#ft kevin day. on a technicality
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donghuamuqing ¡ 5 months ago
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grugdrew and grugneil. And kevin
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AFTG PLAYLIST - NORA'S PICKS
(If Nora blogged it or tagged it, it's here - I hope I got them all, feel free to add if I didn't!)
The Foxhole Court Lean On - Major Lazer & DJ Snake I'm Not A Saint - Billy Raffoul State of My Head - Shinedown
The Sunshine Court Breathe - Lo Spirit
Seth Gordon Hey, What's Up - Munn Someone, Please Come Help - Munn
Neil Josten Scars - Boy Epic
Andrew Minyard Numb Little Bug - Em Beihold
Kevin Day I'm So Sorry - Nico Collins Burning Castles - Nathan Wagner
Perfect Machine - Starset
Jean Moreau Bird Set Free - Sia Movements - Daylily
vivre ou survivre - Daniel Balavoine
Jean & Neil Used to the Darkness - Des Rocs
Nicky Hemmick Saints - Echos Cat & Jean My Same - Adele Jeremy & Laila Count On Me - Bruno Mars
Jean/Renee Walk Thru Fire - ViceTone She Is The Sunlight - Trading Yesterday
Minyard Confetti - Charlotte Cardin
Neil/Andrew Perfectly Broken - Banners
Jeremy Knox I Am - Tom Walker Best Day Of My life - American Authors
Jean/Jeremy The Other Side - The Greatest Showman Stargazing - Myles Smith
Carry You Home - Alex Warren
Kevin & Jean
Shinedown - Through The Ghost Xavier & Min A Boy Named Pluto - Hailey Knox Jean & Elodie (I’m Guessing, tagged: J&E) All of the Stars - Ed Sheeran Cody Winter Not Like I’m In Love With You - LEW
Pre AFTG
Tyler Brayden - Devil You Know (Renee)
Nessa Barrett - dying on the inside (Allison)
"To be tagged later" A Friend Like You - Andy Grammer
(tagged as 'not technically a TSC song' or as 'writing' in 2023) You're Not Alone - Saosin Hear Me Now - Framing Hanley Darkest Hour - Astrid S Might Love Myself - Baretooth My Brother - MisterWives Wings - Birdy Depression - Nathan Wagner Love Me Now, Or Lose Me Later - Kygo, Matt Hansen
Dark Things - Starset Untagged - (maybe just music she likes) Shots - Imagine Dragon Let's Hurt Tonight - One Republic La Di Die - Nessa Barrett I'm Doing Fine - Mike Waters Who Are You - SVRCINA Stole the Show - Kygo ft Parson James Sound of Surviving - Nichole Nordeman Pieces - Daughtry
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decaflondonfog ¡ 1 month ago
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woahhhhh I DID IIIIIIIIIT. @10daysto1k is one of my favourite events/challenges i've participated it in in the last wee while!!! so fun, so chill :') writing has been really hard recently and i needed a kick up the arse an excuse to challenge myself to write without overthinking and over-editing. with the helpful assistance of some randomiser wheels (into which i fed the prompts, a few different fandoms and pairings, and some fun genres/tropes) i am proud to say i made it through all 10 days, wrote a total of 5500 words, and i technically even managed a bingo lol
100 words for the prompt 'bite' — classic combo | aftg, seth/allison, G
200 words for the prompt 'flame' — love letter | atogai, evemer/kadou, G
300 words for the prompt 'departure' — happy haunting | aftg, cat/laila, T
400 words for the prompt 'citrus' — tender treasure | aftg, kevin/ichirou, T
500 words for the prompt 'roommates' — sandy shores | aftg, katelyn/kevin/aaron, T
600 words for the prompt 'voicemail' — unorthodox understanding | svsss, moshang, M
700 words for the prompt 'fate' — monstrous medicine | aftg, kevneil, M
800 words for the prompt 'clones' — curious concoctions | tgcf, hualian, M
900 words for the prompt 'journey' - killer kismet | aftg, kayleigh/wymack, T
1000 words for the prompt 'moonlight' - honeyed homecoming | omgcp, zimbits, E
✨ click hereeeeeee for my series that houses all of the above ✨ and hereeeeee for the full collection ft. +250 works across +60 fandoms ✨
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unproduciblesmackdown ¡ 2 years ago
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& good men wanted behind the scenes finds ft. asia kate dillon
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docstark ¡ 4 years ago
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Ignite (Avengers/Bucky Barnes Fanfiction) Chapter 2 - He Would Have Liked You
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<<Previous Chapter
So this chapter is jumping staying in Doctor Stark's story and will slowly move into the more of a Bucky fanfiction. It's kind of my running story.
Warnings: Language, violence, mentions of 18+ activities lol
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I managed to get control of my power and I made gauntlets so that I wasn’t getting massive internal arm injuries from the vibrations (Agent Coulson said that I probably used the last bit of vibranium that SHIELD had but as Fury didn’t want me to have broken arms…)
Long story short, my brother is Iron Man, I have powers, Captain America was found, and now after some thawing, a freak out in New York where he was taken to wake up in, Steve Rogers himself is now my patient….kind of. (I’m not a practicing doctor)
“I feel like we’ve met,” he said after a long silence.
“In a way we have,” I said as I looked over his blood work, “You knew my father.” His forehead wrinkled as he was looking at me like he was trying to place me with all the people that he once knew. “Of course, if you were to see my brother you would really see the young Howard Stark in him.”
“Stark? You’re Stark’s daughter?”
“Yep.”
“Is...Is he gone? Like everyone else?” He questioned looking at his feet.
“Both he and my mother died in ‘91,” I replied quietly, “Car crash, I was 15.”
“I’m-“
“It’s okay...it was a long time ago.”
“That doesn’t make it any easier,” he said. I remembered hearing from Aunt Peggy how Steve had lost both of his parents as well and it wasn’t something that you want to have in common with someone, but at least he could understand what I went through. “Anyway, are you doing more tests today doc?”
“No, you’ve got as clean of a bill as a super soldier that has been frozen in the ice for nearly 70 years,” I replied, “Got some interesting data on myself as well…”
“On yourself?”
“Oh...it’s nothing,” I said, not meaning to have said that last part out loud. As a scientist it made me curious to see what my own altered gene sequence looked like to that of Captain America’s since both our serums came from the same doctor and the same time period. I honestly wasn’t expecting any huge similarities, but I was surprised that what had been altered in me had also been altered in him, but because of the way that the serum was meant to activate within my body it didn’t turn me into a super soldier, but a weapon.
“And Bucky used to call me a bad liar,” Steve said, crossing his arms and sitting back in his chair, “What’s going on doc?”
I sighed. He was going to find out sooner or later because of The Avengers Initiative that Fury was putting together, so I just told him everything.
“All for that fact that your brother was kidnapped?” he questioned, “You are a tough one and got heart doc…”
“Yeah, well my brother damn near killed me when he found out what I did,” I replied, “But I’m good with my choices. But this isn’t about me…I brought these from the old SSR storage…” I went to go grab the couple of boxes that I brought with me that morning but he beat me to them.
“Let me get those for you,” he said as he carried them over to the table.
“Thank you,” I said, “These boxes have some of your belongings that were stored away after you went missing.”
He opened the box and looked in, there were some old photos, a signed baseball, his father’s dog tags, his mother’s wedding ring. Small things that were squirrelled away from his Brooklyn apartment for if he were to be found again. “These were in storage this whole time?”
“Yeah, I’m going to guess that either my father or Agent Carter had this done,” I said as I reached into the box and pulled out a picture that caught my eye.
“It wouldn’t surprise me at all if Peggy had it done,” he said, looking at the compass that was sitting on the table by where he had been sitting.
“There are other things that belonged to you that aren't as personal that you can find in the Smithsonian,” I said, captivated by the man in the photo.
“He would have liked you,” Steve said looking over my shoulder.
“What?”
“Bucky…he would have liked you,” he said pointing to the picture.
“This is a much better picture than the memorial one that they have in the museum,” I said as Steve and I sat down, “He has playful eyes…”
He snorted. “Oh you have no idea...he knew just how to make everyone feel happy even on the worst days, but when he was around others...oh and women could not get enough of him. Though thinking about it now he was actually quite picky.”
“Man, romance did die in the 40s,” I said lulling my head back as I put the picture back in the box.
He chuckled. “Guys today not what you wish they were?”
“I get more satisfaction from my hand then men nowadays…” There was a silence in the room and I looked at Steve whose ears were now a bright shade of red. “Sorry…”
“It’s fine…”
A FEW DAYS LATER
“You didn’t,” Natasha said as she blocked my punch.
“As you well know, don’t ask me questions you don’t want an honest answer to,” I replied as we continued to spar. As we did so I managed to grab her arm, twist it and use her own leg to give me a little extra leverage to jump and get my legs around her neck and flip her over.
“Good god, woman…” she said, landing with an oomph.
“I’ve been getting some tips from Agent May,” I said with a cheeky grin, “You are the one that told me not to always rely on my powers.”
She sat up and looked up at me. “Want to play it that way huh?”
“Oh shit…”
After getting my ass thoroughly handed to me (though Nat did say that I did quite well), we hit the showers and after returned to our previous conversation...thanks to her.
“So what did he say after you said what you did?” she questioned as we stood at one of the Triskelion’s coffee stands.
“Who say about what?” I asked at first not catching on to what she was talking about.
“Steve….what did he say?”
“Oh, nothing...his ears turned bright red and I apologised, I forgot that in the 1940s they weren’t exactly open about that kind of stuff.”
She let out a snort. “Oh if only the 1940s could see us now!” she said sliding down the zipper of her jacket with a wink.
“You’re horrible,” I said nudging her with my elbow.
“Anyway, what about that guy that you just broke up with?”
“Kevin?” I asked, wrinkling my nose, “For starters, he broke up with me.”
“Excuse me?”
I just shrugged. “He wasn’t worth the time anyway. He only cared about what I could do for his dick, and not what his dick could do for me. No satisfaction what-so-ever...always ended up sneaking off to the bathroom to get off.”
“I hate that...he’s losing out though,” she said as we grabbed our coffee and headed down the hall.
“I don’t need a guy who leaves me feeling unsatisfied or that tells me that I work too much, or that-”
“He does know that you have 3 Phds and are the co-owner of a billion dollar company...right?”
“Must’ve slipped his mind…” I said shrugging.
“Ladies,” we looked and saw Fury as he walked over to us, arms tucked behind his back.
“Doctor, I saw your final report...is Rogers ready when if we need him,” he questioned.
“I think he is, whether or not he thinks he is will come down to what he does when a challenge is put in front of him,” I replied.
“Very well, are you leaving tonight or tomorrow?” he questioned.
“Tonight sir, I believe that Nat is leaving tonight as well, I finished my work with Captain Rogers, got my training in, and now I need to get back to Stark Tower so that Tony and Pepper don’t completely steal my thunder with the sustainable energy for the tower.”
“Very well...a Quinjet will be available for you to take whenever you are ready,” he said with a nod of his head, “Agent Romanoff...good luck on your mission.”
“Thank you sir,” she said.
He left us standing there and I just looked at her. “Did I just get debriefed?”
“In a subtle way, yes.”
“Agent Doctor Stark or Doctor Agent Stark?”
“None of the above….”
“Party-pooper.”
That evening I did find myself back at Stark Tower, at the very top in Tony’s “Home Away From Home”.
“You know Y/N, technically...you could live here,” Tony said as me, him, and Pepper sat on the couch putting making sure we had all our plans put together for when Tony when to connect the Arc Reactor to Stark Tower.
“So generous, but I like my garden,” I replied, “And I like feeling like a normal human being first thing in the morning.”
“Your house is so small,” he said.
“I’m sorry my 3,000 square ft house bothers you so,” I said, “But it’s my ‘small’ house and has all the upgrades that I need. If I ever need a bigger house I’ll just buy the house next door and evict the neighbors and build over onto that plot of land.” I thought Pepper’s head was gonna snap off her neck with as fast as she turned it when I said this. “I’m kidding Pep...cool your jets.”
“The two of you have deep enough pockets, forgive me if I get concerned sometimes,” she said with a chuckled.
“Nah, I like my neighbors...guy across the street is kind of creepy but-“
“Big brother need to step in and take care of him for you?” Tony teased earning an eyeroll.
“When I moved in there, Nancy, the neighbor to the right of me said he’s been the head of the neighborhood watch for 20 years or something like that,” I replied knowing that though he was teasing me, part of him was also serious, “He apparently didn’t like all the people that came in and out of the neighborhood when I was having the house upgraded with Stark Tech, the lab put in the basement, and then the security around the perimeter...I disrupted the peace.”
“Look at you, turning suburbia on its head,” he said.
“Alright you two, enough...let’s get this finished,” Pepper laughed.
Two nights later project clean Sustainability was a go.
“How’s it look big bro?” I asked as Tony flew back to the Tower as it lit up the New York skyline.
“Like Christmas, only more...us,” he replied.
As he landed I turned to Pepper. “I will leave you two to celebrate, I have other work that needs to be felt with.”
“What? N/N, stay and have some champagne,” Pepper said.
“No, you two celebrate. Date night for you two...enjoy.” I headed to the elevator and to my office where I was greeted by my Artificially Intelligent Digital Assistant or AIDA for short.
“Good evening, Doctor Stark. I would like to congratulate you on making Stark tower the first fully clean and sustainable building in the United States,” she said as I sat at my desk, “Also I am being informed by JARVIS that Agent Coulson is trying to get a hold of both you and Mr. Stark, should I put him through?”
I sighed. “If I don’t, he’ll probably just hack his way-“
*DING*
“Agent Coulson…”
"Doctor Stark, I'm sorry to interupt your evening but there is something urgent that we need dealt with," he said holding out a file to me. Opening the file I saw a picture of a familiar blue cube paperclipped to the top. "What do you know about the Tesseract?"
"Only what was in my father's files," I replied. By now there were five people that knew about the files that were given to my by Aunt Peggy. I knew I couldn't keep them a secret forever so I kept it down to:
Fury Coulson Nat Tony Pepper
Thanks to Pepper and her due dillagence, most of the files were now store electronically on an encrypted harddrive. Though there were somethings that were secret to only me.
"Good, in five minutes send what you have up to Mr. Stark," he replied, "The Tessaract was stolen by an Asgardian by the name of Loki. We will need your help on this....time for you to suit up."
As Coulson headed back to the elevator I went over to my computer and pulled up my files. 'Why my father ever fished that thing out of the ocean instead of throwing it back I will never understand....'
TO BE CONTINUED....
Chapter 3>>
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twin-books ¡ 4 years ago
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🌏🤝🎶⏰ Ben 10! :D
Hi, KC! Thanks for the ask! <3 🌏:Any AUs you would like to share? KC, YOU KNOW I HAVE TOO MANY! >: V But I don’t have many I would like to share. I think the one I’m willing to share is an alternate version of Gwen 10′s universe (yes, I like imagining there’s bunch of alternate versions of the alternative versions of the prime timeline because I’m insane that way. :D) In this universe Ben’s the anidote but like a later bloomer than Prime Gwen. But since he’s so determined I like to think he’s on par with Prime Gwen. I also think that he and Kevin don’t get along as well in this universe because they lack the connection Prime Kevin and Ben have. I also like imagining badass fight scenes in my head that I wouldn’t be able to describe at all but they look cool in my head. 
🤝:What other show would you like to see B10 Crossover with? Well we know the obvious; Miraculous Ladybug x Ben 10. Mostly because I need the Chat Noir and Ben interaction and ship. <3 But another crossover I actually really want is Sonic the Hedgehog x Ben 10. I think it presents a lot of cool opportunities and it’s entirely possible as a universe with aliens and magic and the mobians are an alien race. Ben could unlock a mobian form. I would assume it would be the hedgehog since that seems to be the most common subspecies and they are also the most adaptable and durable. It would also be interesting to see what kind of mana chaos energy is and how Gwen would react to it. Rook would get along great with Tails and the idea of really tall Rook next to any mobian is honestly hilarious. I feel like Kevin and Shadow would have some things in common and Kevin would probably get a long great with Knuckles. But I mostly just want to see the interaction between Sonic and Ben. Since their personalities are similar and they both are so action oriented and romantically inept I would find them a chaotic and fun duo. They would drive everyone around them insane and I, frankly, need to see it. :’ D
🎶:List off some songs you think fit certain characters/relationships. Ironically, as much as I love music and matching songs to things, I haven’t done as much with the Ben 10 universe and crew. I think it’s because they are such unique personalities with very unique stories, it’s hard to find what fits. But here’s a small list of what I have so far;  Whatever It Takes by Imagine Dragons - Ben I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace - BenxKai (I don’t ship them at all but this fits them so well... XD) Only Us from Dear Evan Hansen - Gwevin or whatever that ship is called. :’ D End of Me by Ashes Remain - Kevin Escape from the City (Classic Remix) from Sonic Generations - Ben (I have no excuse for this except the fact I just find Sonic and Ben very similar in personality. Though technically this song fits Og Ben and OV Ben better than AF and UA Ben. I have no idea about reboot Ben. Again, I’m not a huge fan of the reboot. ^^;) Born Ready by Dove Cameron - Gwen (Technically this more reminds me of her then fits her). Into the Unknown cover by Panic! at the Disco - No Watch Ben (Again, another one that more reminds me of him rather than fits. XD) Born for This by The Score - Every version of Ben that happens to be a hero RISE ft. The Glitch Mob, Mako, and The Word Alive - Ben and No Watch Ben Top of the World by Greek Fire - Ben There’s probably more that I’ll end up finding as long as I look hard enough. There was a few I had that I’m just not sure about putting on this list yet. XD ⏰:Favourite alternate timeline? No Watch’s timeline. I love the idea of it and all the possibilities. I’m eternally sad that we didn’t get to see enough of the “boring” of his world to really get to see how he felt and no follow up episode to see how he was doing. :’ D You can find the emojis here.
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kuiinncedes ¡ 5 years ago
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All Kinds of Memes!
Thanks for the tag @slipping-through-my-fingertips!! 🥰 (I’m just gonna post it here bc I like the ✨vibes✨ more and I’m pretty sure I said that exact thing another time I put a tag game on this blog when I was tagged on my main so,,,,,,, anyway)
10 songs meme
Rules: You can usually tell a lot about a person by the type of music they listen to! Put your playlist on shuffle and list the first 10 songs and then tag 10 people! No skipping!
“The Archer” live from Paris - Taylor Swift
“Chandelier” - Glee Cast
“Love Song” - Glee Cast
“All I Want Is You” - Kevin McHale
“Blame It On The Alcohol” - Glee cast
“Any Way You Want It/Lovin’ Touchin’ Squeezin’” - Glee Cast
“Come What May” - Glee Cast
“It’s Not Unusual” - Glee Cast
“A Thousand Years” - Glee Cast
“I Don’t Wanna Live Forever” - idk is this technically Zayn ft. Taylor 
Wow Spotify said i’m just gonna play solely glee songs rn lmao
7 albums meme
Rules: Make an image HERE of your top 7 albums, just type in the name and select the alb. This can be too 7 of all time or this year or whatever you’d like.
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Idk just some albums I like i guess 😂 realistically the most that I listen to is Taylor Swift and glee ofc lol but yeah 😗✌️
Check in meme
1. How has your day been? fine, i did really badly on my math quiz but apparently i don’t care about my grades anymore so i’m not upset about it lmao oof
2. What’s the last thing that made you smile? idk probably something on tumblr 
3. What’s keeping your entertained these days? tumblr lmao also fanfiction and rewatching glee 🥴
4. If you’re in some kind of quarantine/self-isolation what do you hope to achieve in this time? i guess i’m in quarantine bc i don’t go anywhere 😂 just school and homework ldsjajkdfal;fj
5. Post selfie, if you’re comfortable doing so: idk if i want to but i never take selfies anyway so i don’t have one 😂
Phone images meme
Phone Background  
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My home screen photo quality is so bad lmao rip sorry Tina ;-;
Last Song 
Current song??
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Last photo I saved
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Lol other than those screenshots I just took it’s this 🤪
Tagging: @gorgxoxus @kurtanaaa @justgleekout @sugarcarnation @porcelain-nightbird if yall want and you can choose which ones to do/not to do or whatever 😋 also anyone who wants to do this I tag you! 😁
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sun-kissed-star ¡ 6 years ago
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Could u write albert/race (platonic or romantic) w adhd!race (btw i l o v e ur fics)
thank u love, just for you here’s a fic of me projecting on race, ft. an asshole date and albert being a sweetheart
trigger warning: ableist language
~~~~~~~
“Come to the park with me on my date, he said,” Albert muttered to himself, swatting a branch out of his face. “It’ll be fun, he said.”
In any given situation, Albert would rather stab out his left eyeball with a spork than be a third-wheel on a date. It made him anxious and turned him from calm and collected to a shy, awkward mess in a matter of seconds. 
Apparently, all those things went out the window when Race was involved. Albert guessed it was fair, anyway. Race had met a cute boy named Kevin at a party, been asked out on a date, and proceeded to beg Albert to come with him. He’d barely talked to the boy and he was “too young and pretty to be murdered on a first date.” (Race’s words, not Albert’s.)
Besides, it wasn’t really third-wheeling. Not when Albert was crouched in a tree, watching Kevin slip his hand into Race’s. It was technically called stalking. 
“You having fun?” Kevin said to Race. They were sitting on a bench directly under Albert’s tree, and frankly, he considered it a miracle Kevin hadn’t looked up yet. 
“Yeah,” Race said, grinning at their linked hands. His cheeks and ears were tinged pink. “I love this park. When I was seven, my mom, my biological one, took me and my best friend Albert here. I don’t live with her anymore, I doubt she remembers it, but I broke my arm. I don’t even remember how. I mean, that wasn’t the last time I was here, that’s the only time I’ve ever broken something. My brother says it’s a miracle I haven’t cracked my head open from all the idiot stuff I do. He shouldn’t be talking, right? He’s usually the reason I do stupid stuff. Me and him went to this park a few weeks ago. Oh, his name’s Jack, I’ve got two brothers and a sister, all adopted, our poor mom. Have you met him? He was at that party we met at, but he was probably passed out on the couch.”
Race took a breath and looked at Kevin expectantly. Albert had followed the entire conversation, more than used to Race when he started rambling, but Kevin didn’t have the same expertise. He looked like a deer in headlights, scrambling to find an endpoint to Race’s story. 
“Um… you’re a foster kid?” he finally settled on saying. “Or, um, you’re adopted?”
Albert didn’t approve. 
“Yeah,” Race said. “Adopted when I was eleven. Did I mention that? Shit, sorry, didn’t mean to unload on you.”
“Um, it’s okay, you didn’t,” Kevin said. “So… what happened with your brother?” Race raised an eyebrow, and Kevin elaborated. “A few weeks ago? When you were here with him?”“Oh!” Race said, and he launched back into his story like he’d never taken a pause. “So, we dragged a trampoline to the base of a tree, and he dared me to jump off a branch and land on the trampoline. We didn’t have a helmet so we just used a pillow. Honestly, that was one of the times where I thought I’d break somethin’ else, but it was just that one time when I was seven. I had a huge scratch on my leg for a couple weeks and I’ve got a scar, but it’s not that bad.”Kevin laughed awkwardly and tucked his hands under his thighs. It was then Albert noticed that Race had pulled their hands apart and was gesturing grandly with one. The other was resting on Kevin’s knee. Race was a tactile guy, and Albert was surprised the hand hadn’t made its way to Kevin’s face. 
“You talk a lot,” Kevin said. 
Race smiled. “Ain’t the first time someone’s told me that, trust me,” he said. “You should talk to my teachers. They’d probably go on tangents longer than mine about me. My math teacher doesn’t like me ‘cause I always get the answer right, but not the way I’m supposed to get it, which is fuckin’ unfa-”
“Let’s get ice cream,” Kevin cut in, standing up suddenly and grabbing Race’s sleeve to tug him up with him.
Race smiled sheepishly as his hand moved to grab Kevin’s again. Kevin stuffed his hands in his pockets pointedly. “Okay, cool. Sorry. Just let me know if I start rambling like that and I’m bein’ annoying. I’m kind of an idiot.”
“It’s fine,” Kevin said with a grin so fake it hurt to look at. The kid was getting a solid two out of ten on Albert’s scale of “People That Deserve To Hang Out With My Friends.”
“Hey, I don’t have my wallet with me,” Race said, patting his pockets. “But I can pay you back for the ice cream. It’d be the gentleman thing to do, right?” He winked, sidling up to Kevin’s side to lean on him, and Albert forced a laugh back down his throat. 
Kevin didn’t think it was funny. When Race’s elbow raised to rest on his shoulder, he moved away. “You didn’t bring your wallet?” he said, frowning. “But I didn’t bring mine. We agreed to get ice cream a couple days ago, when I asked you out, and you said you’d pay. Remember?”
Race’s face fell when Kevin stepped back. “Oh… oh,” he said, realization dawning over his face. “Fuckin’ shit. I’m sorry, Kevin,” he said, running a hand through his hair. Albert wanted to jump down and give him a hug, but that might have had something to do with the fact that his back was permanently cramped from hunching over in the tree for so long. 
Instead of forcing a smile and saying “It’s fine,” which Albert had been expecting, the frown didn’t waver on Kevin’s face. “What’s your problem, man?” he said. “Like, I don’t wanna be rude, but you’ve spent this entire time talking about yourself and you forgot about something we agreed on two days ago.”
“I… dude, I didn’t mean to,” Race tried. “Sorry if I’m being obnoxious. I have ADHD and I’ve been out of meds since last week. I forgot to tell my mom, but she’s picking them up today.”
If anything, Kevin’s scowl deepened, which just made the situation worse. Albert could read Race’s stiff shoulders and fleeting eyes like a book. “That’s not an excuse, dude. I get that you’ve got memory problems or whatever, but we’ve all got our issues. Can’t you just… I don’t know, try harder?” 
“I -”
“Forget it,” Kevin muttered. “I’m not really in the mood for ice cream, I think I’m just gonna go home. I’ll text you or something.” He clapped a hand on Race’s shoulder. “See you later, Tony.”
From the look on his face as he walked off, hands still stuffed deep in his pockets, Albert had a feeling he wouldn’t be texting. 
He waited until Kevin had completely disappeared around the corner. He’d pulled out his phone as soon as he left Race alone, thumps tapping wildly on the screen. Albert could only pray there wouldn’t be rumors about “the weird, freckled kid that never shuts up” at school on Monday. 
He jumped down from his tree, a lot less gracefully than he would’ve prefered. Race jumped a foot in the air and whipped around as Albert sweared loudly, clutching his foot. 
“Shit, I forgot you were up there,” Race said. His shoulders slumped, and he looked more like a kicked puppy than a dejected teenage boy. “Sorry you had to listen to all that. Like, me rambling and then gettin’ ditched by Kevin and whatever.”
“Shut up,” Albert said. Hearing himself out loud, he quickly backtracked, “I-I mean, you can talk as much as you want. I just don’t want you to… you’ve said sorry too much today, Racer. It’s not your fault.”He stared intently at the hole in the toe of his Converse as he was talking, and when he looked up, Race’s eyes were red. He wasn’t quite crying, but his voice cracked when he spoke.
“Yes it is.” It sounded like he’d tried to sound angry with himself, to snap out his words like a rubber band against raw skin, but he just sounded sad. “Don’t play dumb, Albie. Kevin’s right. I talked about myself too much, and I forgot about somethin’ so fuckin’ simple, and I chased him away. Did you see his face?” he demanded. “He looked at me like I was a fuckin’ alien from Area 51, and then he left.”
As much as Albert wanted to say “Good riddance to him, then,” he didn’t think it would be appreciated. He stepped forward, Race sunk his head into his shoulder.
“I’m such an idiot,” he said, words muffled in Albert’s shirt. “And I kind of wanted that ice cream, babe, not gonna lie.” 
Albert gripped the back of Race’s neck wordlessly, knowing the pressure was grounding and comforting from how often Race did it to him. “Lucky for you,” he mumbled in Race’s ear, “I always come prepared. C’mon, dude, my brother gave me twenty bucks and I’m spending all of it before I step foot in my house.”
Race smiled against his shoulder. “What would I do without you? Seriously, would I be dead? I think I’d be dead.”
“No, you just wouldn’t have stories to tell about breaking your arm with me to asshole dates.”
“He wasn’t an as-”
“Race. You told him you had ADHD, and he told you to try harder and get over it.”
“I should’ve told him before so he’d know how much work I can b-”“If I told someone I had autism and they told me to suck it up and stop whining, would you deck them or not?”
Race lifted his head, silently pursing his lips together. “Okay,” he admitted. “He was kind of an asshole.”
Albert nodded solemnly. “The asshole to end all assholes,” he said. He was just trying to make Race laugh and they both knew it, but in his defense, it was working. “C’mon,” he said, grabbing Race’s collar and ushering him towards the sidewalk. “Chocolate or vanilla?”“Both. Extra sprinkles.”
“Damn. You know I’m paying, right? Maybe you’re the asshole.”
Race laughed again, throwing his head back and an arm around Albert’s shoulders, and for the first time in an hour, all was right with Albert’s world. 
TAG LIST
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orbemnews ¡ 5 years ago
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Kelly Loeffler and the N.Y.S.E. Schwab cited “at present’s hyperpartisan atmosphere” as an element. “We consider a transparent and apolitical place is in the most effective curiosity of our shoppers, staff, stockholders and the communities during which we function,” the corporate mentioned in an announcement. The corporate’s PAC had cut up its donations — $460,000 in the latest election cycle — roughly equally alongside occasion traces. Within the newest interval, it gave to the Home minority chief, Consultant Kevin McCarthy of California, whose vote in opposition to certifying the election outcomes made Schwab a goal of advertisements calling out firms for funding lawmakers looking for to overturn the vote. “It’s a unhappy byproduct of the present political local weather that some now resort to utilizing questionable techniques and deceptive claims to assault firms like ours,” the corporate mentioned, alluding to the stress campaigns. The corporate, which is a member of the Shopper Financial institution Affiliation, mentioned that closing its PAC wouldn’t diminish its voice with lawmakers, noting it was a “main employer in a dozen metropolitan facilities.” In different fallout from the Capitol revolt: Airbnb will cancel and block all reservations within the Washington space subsequent week, amid fears of extra violence on the inauguration of President-elect Joe Biden. Google will ban political advertisements on its platforms till the inauguration. It follows related strikes by Fb to restrict the unfold of election-related misinformation. Jack Dorsey, the C.E.O. of Twitter, mentioned he didn’t “have fun or really feel satisfaction” in banning Mr. Trump from the platform, however urged followers to weigh in, asking: “Was this right?” 1000’s have responded. “A driver could also be human or could also be software program. I believe there shall be an extended time period during which it is going to be a hybrid.” — Dara Khosrowshahi, Uber’s C.E.O., on the way forward for self-driving automobiles. On the newest episode of Kara Swisher’s Occasions Opinion podcast, Sway, he additionally discusses the impact of the pandemic on supply companies, the way forward for regulation within the gig financial system and extra. Did Intel’s C.E.O. change head off an activist battle? Intel moved yesterday to change Bob Swan as C.E.O., two years after giving him the place on a everlasting foundation. Although the embattled chip big insisted that the transfer was unrelated to stress from the activist investor Dan Loeb, it’s certainly hoping the change has placated the hedge fund supervisor. Mr. Loeb’s Third Level fund pushed for change as Intel faces massive challenges. The chipmaker’s inventory has underperformed as manufacturing points left the corporate trailing rivals like TSMC, Samsung, AMD and Nvidia. Intel has been shedding engineering expertise, elevating questions on whether or not Mr. Swan — who has a finance background — was the appropriate particular person to make robust technical choices. In a letter to Intel’s board final month, Mr. Loeb pressed the corporate to think about the separation of chip manufacturing from design, and unwind underperforming acquisitions. Intel’s new chief shall be Pat Gelsinger, the extremely regarded C.E.O. of the software program maker VMware, who was beforehand Intel’s chief know-how officer. His engineering background — fairly than stress from Third Level — was behind the transfer, based on the corporate: “The board concluded that now could be the appropriate time to make this management change to attract on Pat’s know-how and engineering experience throughout this essential interval of transformation at Intel,” Omar Ishrak, the corporate’s chairman, mentioned. In a stark evaluation of what traders considered the change, Intel shares jumped 7 p.c yesterday, including $15 billion to its market cap. Shares in VMware fell almost 7 p.c, value about $4 billion in market cap for the smaller agency, which is unhealthy for the corporate’s shareholders — however maybe good for Mr. Gelsinger’s shallowness. All eyes at the moment are on Mr. Loeb. He praised Intel’s transfer, tweeting: “Swan is a category act and did the appropriate factor for all stake holders stepping apart.” However watch whether or not he information a slate of board nominees, signaling a doubtlessly brutal proxy struggle, earlier than at present’s deadline. THE SPEED READ Offers The French authorities signaled that it could oppose Couche-Tard’s $20 billion takeover bid for the grocery chain Carrefour, citing meals sovereignty and job safety. (Reuters) Two firms’ I.P.O.s priced above expectations: The pet items retailer Petco offered shares at $18 every, elevating $816 million, whereas the web market Poshmark did so at $42, elevating $277 million. (Reuters, Bloomberg) Why SPACs are booming in New York however not in London. (Quartz) Politics and coverage The Trump administration gained’t bar Individuals from investing in Alibaba, Baidu and Tencent as a part of efforts to punish firms tied to China’s army. (WSJ) Doug Leone, the billionaire head of the enterprise capital agency Sequoia, renounced his assist for President Trump after final week’s Capitol rampage. (Recode) Tech Connecticut is investigating whether or not Amazon’s e-books enterprise broke antitrust legal guidelines. (WSJ) Carmakers worldwide are affected by a elements scarcity, and shopper electronics like PlayStations are guilty. (NYT) Better of the remainder Local weather activists criticized BlackRock for holding billions in investments in coal firms, regardless of its said give attention to local weather change. (Enterprise Insider) David Barclay, the British billionaire who co-owned The Day by day Telegraph newspaper and whose familial drama dominated headlines, has died. He was 86. (FT) Let’s be trustworthy, that is big information even for a enterprise publication: The N.B.A. famous person James Harden is leaving the Houston Rockets for the Brooklyn Nets in a four-team commerce that would reshape the league. (NYT) We’d like your suggestions! Please e mail ideas and solutions to [email protected]. Supply hyperlink #Kelly #Loeffler #NYSE
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earwaxinggibbous ¡ 7 years ago
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10 Songs that make Love/Sex Sound Like No Fun
Happy Vagina Day! I mean Happy Valentines Day!
[wipes brow]
What do you mean it’s the 15th???
Valentines Day has always been my least favorite holiday, even now when I can actually appreciate it as a taken man. I was never a very romantic person, as hard as I try, and a lot of the gushy crap forced down our throats around February is akin to being buttfucked with a tree branch. It’s like walking into a store and all of the workers are talking in uwu-speak.
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Hewwo wewcome to Gwistedes dat wiww be 20 dowwaws! Cash oah cwedit?
But if February is good for one thing aside from overcoming your Winter Break Hangover, as a song critic, it’s a good time to talk about love songs. (And fuck songs, ‘cause there’s a lot of those.) But talking about songs that actually bring out powerful romantic feelings is absolutely no fun, because like I said, I’m not a romantic man. Wouldn’t it be much more fun to find love and sex songs that make the acts seem... really, really lame? So that’s what we’re doing.
Keep in mind that I don’t know every song on the planet, in fact, my scope is actually a very small, strange corner of the musical world. So if you have your own list, feel free to put it together and show me if you want! Go crazy.
Honorable mentions go to any songs that aren’t actually intended to be romantic or sexy. Stuff like The Nine Inch Nails’ Closer. Or Eminem’s Kim. If that’s your idea of love, well... you do you I guess. There’ll be more honorables later.
Nuuuumber 10!
Closer - The Chainsmokers ft. Halsey
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I personally believe both of the artists involved in this are more sexually weak than Kevin from F is for Family. (And if you’ve watched the whole series you know exactly what I’m talking about. Also hit me the fuck up, I need someone to fanboy over that shit with.)
I like Halsey. I don’t think she’s amazing or anything. Oftentimes I feel like her greatest flaw as an artist is that she wants to do three things at once: Appeal to internet people who like stuff like Marina and Lana del Rey (eg. Colors), appeal to a mainstream that just likes regular easy-listening pop music (eg. New Americana), and also just do her own thing and talk about her own experiences (eg. Control and Gasoline). These things don’t really work that well together at times. New Americana is one of those times, I hate that song. Closer is another one of those times.
The Chainsmokers kind of improved by 2017, but for awhile they were putting out soulless crap like Don’t Let Me Down with all the excitement of a party that only consists of art students. Closer is also lame. But more than that it shows me two things: The first being that Andrew Taggart is an asshole, and the second being that the Chainsmokers don’t know how to write women and even Halsey’s halfway-decent voice and attempts at emotion can’t really fix it.
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“Hey, I drink a lot. But everything was fine before we started dating, so it must be YOUR fault!”
Part of me almost feels like Taggart just really wants to fuck Halsey and so he wrote this song as an excuse, like it’s essentially the expensive version of a self-insert fanfic. 
If the Chainsmokers are good at one thing, it’s lyrical detail. It worked in their favor in Paris, which is a song that I actually really love. All of the tiny details worked into it paint an insanely vivid picture of these two rich kids basically having some kind of one-night stand.
In Closer it does the complete opposite. I have a hard time believing that there’s any thought less sexy than fucking in the backseat of a range rover with a mattress in the trunk that belonged to your roommate, and they probably masturbated on it and how do you even have this car if you can’t afford it? Or is Taggart just being fucking presumptuous? Dammit, man.
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Halsey plays this really pathetic character who left Taggart’s character based on looks alone, and is now regretting it because I guess the endless sexual draw of the weird long-headed guy from the Chainsmokers would make anyone change their mind. It paints Halsey’s character as pathetic, and that’s a character I have absolutely never wanted to see her play. Because her personality as a singer is kind of thin. When she’s playing a character who is aggressive and violently emotional, it works, but when in a role like this it feels like misuse of her actual talent. Kind of equivalent to when they got Eminem on that strip club song Shake That.
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(He don’t get it. You don’t get it. And most of all, I don’t get it.)
Frankly, Halsey’s strengths (”specific yet vague” emotional detail) don’t play off well with the Chainsmokers’ strengths. (detailed scenery to piece together vague stories) These two should never have gotten together. Frankly, they shouldn’t have even tried,
NumĂŠro Neuf
You Was Right - Lil Uzi Vert
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His face is so weird. It’s just so weird.
I have a kind of odd love of Lil Uzi Vert, despite the fact I’ve only heard one song that I really liked. (XO Tour Lif3, for the record.) I feel like he has a creative energy that most artists in pop are missing, but he’s really, REALLY not using it to his advantage. A lot of his songs are just kind of... nothing. 
You Was Right is one of those hits that was so early in 2017, my brain keeps telling me it was a 2016 hit. It was also Uzi’s first platinum single. It’s an okay song musically. Not that interesting. Beat kind of sounds like it was bumped from Wicked, which is not helped by the fact that Metro Boomin’ was involved in both songs. But lyrically, this song is... weird and confusing.
The basic plot makes sense: Lil Uzi’s character in this song feels bad after cheating on his girlfriend, and he wishes he could turn back time and stop himself from doing so. But man. This song makes the idea of a relationship with Lil Uzi sound like way more trouble than it’s worth.
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I bet you’re asking me: “Panda, is this line accompanied by the most obnoxious eye-roll possible in the music video?”
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Yes. Yes it is.
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Yep, that’s right. Lil Uzi is feeling guilty, and wishes he’d never taken this girl home, and--
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Uzi stop.
You should’ve just not. Done anything. Because you have a girlfriend. You shouldn’t have boned, you should’ve gone home and boned your girlfriend, dammit Lil Uzi. Let me like you, you bastard.
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The reason this isn’t any higher is because I at least feel like Uzi has some kind of love for his girlfriend. As the second line indicates that the moment he saw his girlfriend, he immediately passed by some other woman to hit her up. But still...
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I THINK YOU KIND OF DID WRECK HER. YOU FUCKED A GROUPIE, MAN.
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This whole verse is just funny I have no explanation. Like. You’re in the same room, but because the door is locked, even though... you’re in the same room? You can’t talk? But she’s actually in the bathroom. And Uzi needs to take a piss, so he’s basically just forcing some romantic lovey-dovey crap, like babe I wanna caress you, I’m seriously gonna wreck the carpet right now, can we just move on from this.
But here’s the best/worst line, in my humble onion:
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1. What does this have to do with anything,
2. He’s gonna fuck your sister and then kill her if you talk shit, I guess. So to my sister, I am very sorry.
I think Uzi improved on conveying emotion in his next album, or at least with the big single XO Tour Lif3, which I’ll defend until I’m dead. But as for You Was Right, well... he was wrong.
NĂşmero Ochoooooo!
Shape Of You - Ed Sheeran
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Did you wanna fuck Ed Sheeran?
NO?
TOO BAD.
Ed Sheeran is a musician I enjoy purely for the purpose of mocking him. While he does, now and then, drop a good single like Don’t, Sing or Castle on the Hill, oftentimes he exudes only one thing:
PERPETUAL VIRGINITY!
Maybe it’s because of his voice. Or maybe it’s because he looks like a high schooler who hit puberty too late. Maybe it’s because I have THIS picture of him saved to my computer:
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Look at him. Look at his fucking face.
He just exudes involuntary celibacy. Not like the reddit “hurgh durgh FEMOIDS” kind, just like. The “sees a naked boob and passes out bleeding like an anime character” kind.
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Look at his fucking face. He looks like he’s not sure how to hold a woman’s hand. He looks like he doesn’t even know what it is. I don’t know how I’m expected to recognize Ed Sheeran as a sexually active man. The weird dinky three-tone beat ripped straight from Sia’s Cheap Thrills and pretty much every Rihanna song ever, namely Work, doesn’t help in the slightest. Because here’s the thing: Work and Cheap Thrills are not sex songs. If anything, they’re songs about the lower class and their struggles. No fucking required, unless you count Drake’s verse on Work.
Shape Of You is a sex song. And it’s about as sexy as wedging your dick in a paper bag.
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It’s like it was supposed to be a romantic sex song, but the vibe I’m getting is a teenage boy up in your DMs asking (admittedly politely) for titty pics. 
He’s in love with the shape of you. Just your outline. Your contour. Like that one episode of Ed Edd ‘n Eddy where Jimmy somehow gets his linework stolen and has to be kept in a blender? He wouldn’t fuck a lady like that. You gotta have a... shape. Square. Circle. 
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RECTANGLE GIRLS OF THE WORLD
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This isn’t helping the whole “virginal loser” thing for the record.
The verses try to be more romantic, and totally fail at it because let’s be honest, if Ed Sheeran took me to an all-you-can-eat buffet on our first date, I’d probably kill him. McDonald’s is even preferable. I guess it’s also technically more expensive if you want seconds, but like... everyone there is probably sweaty... and the food usually looks really gross. Sometimes you have mashed potatoes in the steak bucket and it just completely ruins your day.
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Ed’s wispy delivery really doesn’t help, as he has all the sexual energy of a castrated Charlie Puth. He’s not crazy. He does not fit the radio definition of “crazy”. He’s the musician that I just see the least as one who fucks. Puth gets more pussy. The ICP get more pussy. Meghan Trainor probably fucks more than he does, and I wouldn’t be surprised if she was some kind of otherworldly plant being that reproduces via budding. 
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Also I’d feel bad if I didn’t mention the video, which is literally, no joke, the video for Maroon 5′s One More Night. You know, where the lead singer becomes a badass boxer who punches shit. Now I’ll probably drop my feelings towards Maroon 5 with more detail in the future, but in short, I actually enjoy most of their singles. One More Night is a fun song in my opinion, not high art or anything, but I like it. Adam’s falsetto doesn’t bug me as much as other people. I’d prefer him singing in a high pitch than, say, Swae Lee.
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(Dammit Swae, let me love you, you bastard.)
But see, I actually also prefer the VIDEO for One More Night. For two big reasons.
1. Adam Levine is at least a little more threatening than Ed Sheeran. Remember how fucking goofy Animals was BECAUSE Adam was singing it? Imagine if Ed was on that track. It’d be ridiculous.
and
2. One More Night was a song about how his relationship with his girlfriend basically feels like a warzone. The violence in the music video was, at some level, metaphorical. In Shape Of You it doesn’t have any emotional or symbolic relevance, so I just have to take at face-value that Ed Sheeran is a boxer, and...
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That’s just not happening.
Numerum VII!
Blurred Lines - Robin Thicke ft. Pharrell and T.I.
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This would easily be higher up if not for the fact that, on the most technical level, it’s a joke song.
Bet you didn’t know that.
Yeah, the joke here is that these three are singing this ridiculous sex jam despite in real life all being happily married men (or at least were at the time this song came out, Robin’s wife promptly dropped him as soon as this album fell into our collective hands) who are way past their prime when it comes to flirting with chicks at the club. Also, Pharrell looks like an alien.
I’m not gonna extend this too much, as everyone’s already riffed on Blurred Lines more than we’ve probably riffed on other socially questionable songs like U.O.E.N.O. or Treat You Better. But this song sounds like it... COULD BE about sexual assault?
I’ll be fair and say that I don’t think this is straight-up a rape song. Because the thing is that it’s not actually about sex, it’s about picking up girls. But Robin’s approach is so slimy and gross that I’d honestly prefer, very specifically, to re-enact that one scene from The Simpsons’ Cape Feare where they drive through a bunch of cacti with Sideshow Bob hanging on the bottom of the car, and I’m Sideshow Bob, but facing the ground with my dick out, so it slides through the cactus like a sad, sad little pool noodle full of thumbtacks.
On one hand, there’s implications of attempting to get consent, and on the other hand, there’s also discussion of whether or not he’s actually GETTING consent or not. Maybe it’d work if Robin Thicke had more swagger to his personality, and if they removed all the stuff about “blurred lines”, it’d be less suspicious. But even then it’d still sound like a /r/niceguy trying to convince a girl that she WANTS to fuck him.
Once again I’d like to mention the video real quick, specifically the alternate version.
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The topless version somehow makes it even LESS sexy. When the women were clothed, it definitely gave more of a vibe of “cheeky girl at a bar playing hard to get”, but once you have a bunch of topless chicks running around looking unhappy and bored, it reads more as... “harem sex dungeon”.
Not much else to say, really. Other than that Miley Cyrus has horrible taste in men.
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Even you can do better, Miley.
Nummer Sechs!
The Hills - The Weeknd
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The Hills is about as sexy as getting the bottom half of my body lost in the void while prime minister Shinzo Abe projectile vomits onto my face.
I actually like this song. But it doesn’t sound like sex. At all.
It does sound like a good horror movie soundtrack, which I guess...
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I guess at least this line would make sense if it was?
Everything about this song kind of punches you. The beat punches you and the tune punches you and it’s really really loud. Literally everything about this song fits together EXCEPT THE PREMISE. This is, from what I can gather, a song about some dark spooky sex machine who’s helping a girl cheat on her boyfriend, but doesn’t really care because his drug problem or something is more important to him. And nothing fits with it.
Say what you want about Earned It, it sounds like a sex song. Maybe I’ll discuss that song in the future, but while Earned It creates the vibe of some sort of expensive Blank Space-esque rich guy mansion with a sexual twist, The Hills sounds more like... an explosion in a really dark place. Even the video works for the sound more than it works for the premise. Frankly, if this had been a song about a break-up or being sent to prison or something, I’d totally buy it. The Weeknd’s warbling baby voice can convey suffering more than it can convey sex.
The best way I can explain this is...
Imagine if Rolex was backed by the ending track from A Serbian Film. That’s the tonal problem we’re talking here.
Though lyrically, The Hills isn’t high art either.
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Bragging about erectile dysfunction: Counting this and Young Thug’s Lifestyle, I guess we can call this a theme now. I hate it. Also, Weeknd rhymes “simple” with “simple”. And the fact that this is a fuckjam makes the title drop of The Hills Have Eyes even more questionable. I’d honestly rather hear a sex song based on Cannibal Holocaust.
Also, fun fact, this song has a remix featuring Eminem. Fucking EMINEM. That is the least sexy rapper you could have picked. You could have chosen anyone for your sex song, and you picked the man responsible for such classic sensual love songs as Stan and Just Lose It.
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Dear Weeknd, I wrote you but you still ain’t callin’...
Still a song I like. Just... pretend it’s not about boning.
Numero Cinque!
Bad Things - Machine Gun Kelly ft. Camila Cabello
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I debated deep in my heart as to whether or not I could, in good taste, put this song on the list. Because I really shouldn’t expect a whole lot from ex-Fifth Harmony member as well as the only Fifth Harmony member anyone knows the name of, Camila Cabello, as well as this weirdo Machine Gun Kelly, who looks like a very failed attempt to clone Macklemore.
But then I read this.
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Wait, this is a love song?
I thought it was just... about like, fucking.
ALSO WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU SAMPLE OUT OF MY HEAD IN A LOVE SONG.
And most importantly, and much less aggressively, why does this song sound like it’s about, like... abuse.
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Like, yeah. You’re- you’re giving each other scars. And guess what! This is actually edited.
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Somehow the edit makes it both better and worse. Because on one hand, like, bruises usually sounds like more of an abuse thing. When I think of an abuse victim I see bruises. But, also, scars are... technically a bigger deal? Bruises go away. If you’re scarring up your SO, then you have some serious issues. And MGK’s uninterested delivery makes it way worse, as well as the Fastball sample that is from a song about hurting your lover. Which kind of sounds, uh, a lot like... what’s going on here.
And, uh, I guess you could argue they’re in a really intense BDSM relationship? I guess Camila seems pretty into it, and not really in like, a Stockholm Syndrome way. But the other thing that takes up a good chunk of this song is the comparison between drug dependence and romance.
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Which really doesn’t help?
Like drugs aren’t a good thing. Honestly I feel like Kesha using this metaphor was a sign of things to come considering what happened to her in 2017. Because, here’s a crazy thought, drugs may be addictive... but they also hurt you.
Like an abusive partnerokay we’re moving on sorry.
Numero Neljä!
Treat You Better - Shawn Mendes
Oh hey, I like, just mentioned this one.
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Honestly, Kodak Black’s Side N**** would’ve taken this spot, except that I don’t wanna think about Kodak Black. Ever. So you get the whiter version of it.
Treat You Better is another one of those songs that makes the idea of dating the singer sound insanely unappealing. But unlike You Was Right above, Treat You Better has next to no self-awareness.
I’ll admit that I don’t really hate Shawn Mendes. I actually like Stitches, the tune is nice enough and regardless of how you feel about this apparently 6′2 tower of twink flesh, you can’t really argue that he hasn’t got a decent set of pipes on him. 
But damn if his songwriters aren’t trying to sour my opinion of him at every turn.
If this were an actual review, I’d complain about how the backing guitar sounds exactly LIKE Stitches, but the problems arise in the lyrics, and the way the video plays off of the lyrics.
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oh wait excuse me
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Alright sorry.
But in case you can’t tell, Treat You Better is basically a niceguy anthem. I mean, when I read the title I thought it was like the earlier-mentioned Fastball’s Out Of My Head or Hoobastoobaskeeboodidillybaboobastank’s The Reason where the male singer does some nonspecific bad thing to their SO and vows to be better in the future. You know, like--
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(YAH... HUH... I PROMISE TO, UH... BE BETTER... YIEAH...)
But no, actually. Treat You Better is more equivalent to Daya’s Hide Away, which you could honestly consider as on this list in the exact same spot because they’re basically the same song.
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I suspect the reason nobody wants to date Daya is because she dresses like Heather Chandler in the 2018 Heathers remake.
I also suspect her and Shawn would absolutely love one another’s company. 
To be absolutely fair, neither of these songs take the stance that real life nicefolk take, because it’d make them look absolutely insufferable. The big reason I chose Treat You Better over Hide Away for this list is that the video tries to imply that Shawn’s object of attraction is being abused by her current boyfriend. Which I guess makes sense, but...
I love how the combination of the song and the video essentially imply that Shawn’s got this ladyfriend who’s being beaten to shit by her boyfriend and his only response is man, this is why you should’ve dated me instead! I would be WAY better to you than that guy!
Instead of, you know.
This guy is seriously terrible to you and I’m calling the police.
Or better yet!
Kill him.
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Also this girl’s just not... a very good actress. I’m not asking for a Hollywood performance, just, you know. Some kind of expression other than “mild disinterest” when you’re about to get your shit kicked in would be nice.
Really the big issue is that, regardless of whether or not we’re supposed to see the girl as an abuse victim, Shawn will forever see himself as the victim. Which means it’s either
A. Some dildo victimizing himself because his best friend is a taken woman and he wants to Betta in her Dannygans.
or B. Some dildo victimizing himself because his best friend is in an abusive relationship... and he wants to Betta in her Dannygans.
So either way, Shawn Mendes’ greatest worry isn’t your safety, or if you’re happy in your current relationship, his one worry is getting his spindly little baby-soft white boy hands into your undies. And frankly, I just don’t need that in my life!
the third one
Honey I’m Good - Andy Grammar
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How much do you wanna bet all these couples broke up/got divorced after featuring in this thing? 
I labored over how this one matched up with #2, but decided it was at least making some sad, sad attempt to promote faithfulness in couples. See the plot of this song written by Andy Grammar, who I’m assuming is a one-hit wonder because I’d certainly never heard of him until this song came out, is stated very clearly:
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I think the best part about this is the way it’s worded. “I gotta be like oh baby, nah baby” makes him sound so annoyed. Like, “Ugh, I wanna bone you, but I wanna be nice to my wife or whatever, so I GUESS I’ll turn you down... Sigh...”
So this is essentially a self-fellating anthem congratulating Andy’s character for not cheating on his wife. Because, as he says,
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“Yeah, babe, better men than me have cheated on their wives, so it’d be totally fine if I DID, but I’m such a Nice Dude that I won’t do it. For my wife. Smooch.”
One could argue that he’s supposed to be drunk, but let’s be real here: Being drunk doesn’t make you lie. If anything, it makes you more honest. Booze is a truth serum. Now if he had just gotten out of dental care after getting his wisdom teeth pulled and his hot lady dentist was trying to flirt with him, maybe I could imagine it making sense.
And once again, the Devil’s Advocate could say, “well if he’s being honest, then this shouldn’t be a problem, he’s faithful to his wife”, but the thing is that he’s not even totally drunk yet.
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Translation: If I have another drink, I’ll be so boozed up that my honest feelings will make me want to fuck that ass.
He’s tipsy at best, which is why he’d admit to considering this at all, but if he were more drunk he’d totally fuck this assumedly more attractive woman. So for all we know he’ll go back to the club tomorrow, have one too many, and considering how well this stupid song did, he’d throw enough money at the next Cambodian prostitute he runs into to buy her a mansion.
The congratulatory tone to the music doesn’t really help, it really does feel like Grammar is sucking himself off for having the “willpower” to not be a completely terrible person. The only thing that makes it even more hilariously sad is the video of elderly couples lip-syncing to it, all the while holding up signs or wearing shirts that say how many years they’ve been together. It’s as if they’re bragging about how their marriage is bound to last way longer than the marriage in the song.
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“Mildred, do you promise not to bone a random guy at the bar when I’m home?” “Only if you promise not to do that either, you rascal you.”
For all I know, Andy Grammar’s a great guy! But with only this song to go by, I’m obligated to assume that he’s a complete dildo who wears a mask of faux-Southern charm when he’s sober and avoids getting drunk so that mask doesn’t shloff off of his face like he’s a juggalo at the official sprinkler festival.
The weirdest part of this to me is that this song is so catchy we actually fell for it, if only for awhile. And its happy tone kind of makes you forget the lyrics. I almost feel like that was intentional. Like, his producers looked at the lyrics and just said, “Boys, let’s fix this shit.” It’s not even good production, it’s just really catchy! Fuck!
All in all, Honey I’m Good is about as romantic as listening to my parents argue at 12 in the morning. Not only is there no reason Andy Grammar deserves any congrats on his mediocre “feat”, but he really doesn’t seem to love his wife that much, if a shot of tequila and a scantily-clad cokewhore is enough to wreck his faith.
Numbah TWOOOOO!
What The Hell - Avril Lavigne
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I’d honestly argue that Avril Lavigne’s character as a singer is equally sociopathic to that of Taylor Swift and Cher Lloyd. I feel like after Hello Kitty slaughtered her reputation and career forever, we kind of forgot how genuinely terrifying she was. She’s like every horrible thing about being a teenager squeezed into one person who’s way too old to be pretending to be a teenager. I mean, look at Girlfriend. The only thing more terrifying than Girlfriend is, well, What The Hell. 
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Because, you know. That’s not a problem or anything.
Rather than the obsessive character from Girlfriend, Avril in this song is the complete opposite. She doesn’t make connections with anybody, and when she’s sick of a relationship, she’ll move onto her boyfriend’s friends, strangers, fans, non-fans, parents, teachers, Todd Howard, etcetera. So she’ll go around macking on anything she wants and then have blase, slightly annoyed reaction when her boyfriend is completely horrified by it.
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(This? This is my greatest fear.)
Her disinterest really comes out in the lyrics, and her sales pitch is, basically, this is just who I am and you should fuck me even if you don’t like it. Especially since, while I hate to be the guy who says it, if this was a song by a guy, everyone would fucking hate it. I actually don’t mind the beat or the tune, honestly, I listen to this song sometimes when I’m out of music that rises above the bar of “guilty pleasure”. That almost makes this worse. Everything is delivered with the disinterest of a Future verse, as if this is just a normal thing, and looking back imagining middle school me singing along to this is pretty fucked. 
Not that I really blame this for any kind of influence on children. Honestly I don’t think anyone was really listening to the lyrics, they were just having fun. It’s fun! That’s pretty messed up.
By the way, I think this bit on the bridge says a lot about Avril as a writer (and maybe even as a person):
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I love the assumption that this guy is still devoted to her after she has cheated on him and shown no remorse whatsoever. Why would he really want her back? Personally I’d say something along the lines of “fuck you, bitch, go get syphilis somewhere where it can’t be transferred to me.” Bye bye!
Really, though, the more Avril Lavigne tried to lean into her teen rebellion phase, the more I realized how old she was. And as she got older, and tried to be more rebellious, it became less endearing and more sociopathic. Maybe she’s a really nice person, but at the same time, to write a song like this, I can’t really tell. Especially when THIS is how she describes it:
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Avril, you read the lyrics, right? Of course you did, you sang it. Jesus, lady.
Well, before we move onto the big weiner, let’s talk honorable mentions!
You Belong With Me - Taylor Swift
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Surprised that Taylor didn’t make it on here? It came down to the wire, but in the end, the concept of screwing in a pile of jizzy sheets in a range rover bumped this one off the list. Still, though, Taylor’s attempts to be “relatable” end up making her sound desperate. And also Taylor’s pre-existing ideas of why she’s “better” for him than this other girl kinda remind me of...
Hide Away - Daya
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I almost wish I had found space for this song since I hate it so much. But really my biggest problem with it is that Daya sings like a rubber goose and that, of course, the nicegirl/niceguy mentality needs to die and people like Daya are perpetuating it.
Don’t Wanna Know - Maroon 5 ft. Kendrick Lamar
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Yikes, dude. Just... yikes.
Marvin Gaye - Charlie Puth ft. Meghan Trainor
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Charlie Puth and Meghan Trainor are two beacons of sexlessness and this song does Marvin Gaye a disservice. The only reason I left it off is because it’s honestly been discussed to death, I’m almost like, tired of hearing about it. 
Side N**** - Kodak Black
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This isn’t even a niceguy song, it’s literally “you should date me because I’ll shoot you and your man if you don’t”. I’d have loved to make space for it, but I don’t even want to listen to this song in full, or talk about this guy. At this point Kodak Black is keeping the fire lit with controversy. I’d like to just dump water on it.
NUMBER ONE!
Sigh. This one’s obvious enough.
Dear Future Husband - Meghan Trainor ft. Satan, probably
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Sometimes you just gotta throw your hands up and say STOP, MEGHAN! STOP!
STOP!
Meghan Trainor is an artist who I actually do understand the appeal of: She appeals to white feminist teenage girls and soccer moms that still read Twilight even though their daughters are long since over it. But, sadly, that’s two demographics of people I hate, and  thus, I find myself hating everything Meghan Trainor puts out. The only remotely passable single I remember by her was Lips Are Moving. Dear Future Husband isn’t even my least favorite fucking Meghan Trainor song. (It’d probably be No, if I had to pick.) But god, if this song isn’t just... oof.
Let’s get the shoehorned feminist message out of the way:
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We know you have a job, nobody’s expecting you to cook, why would you bake pies all day, who needs that many pies, no you can’t write a hook, and these views are insanely outdated for anyone who doesn’t have a Return of Kings account. So great, you have a job and can’t cook. Cool. That’s a thing with a lot of people.
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Honestly the insistence that she “deserves it” even though she makes no attempt to prove herself a good wife aside from saying she’ll buy you groceries and fuck you sometimes. This song kind of lays on the assumption that you’ll do literally anything because, duh, she’s famous musician Meghan Trainor, and if you don’t do these things, YOU JUST HATE FAT GIRLS.
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(Mary Lambert never pulls this shit. And she weighs more than the gold toilet you use, while you’re using it, MEGHAN.)
Honestly though, listening to Meghan Trainor songs just kind of turn me into that obnoxious guy on 4chan who unironically uses the term “feminazi” in 2018. Because really, she fits every feminist stereotype in existence, and she never says anything of any worth.
Now that we’ve got that out of the way--
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Acting crazy... how?
Do we mean like, Ren & Stimpy crazy, or Avril Lavigne crazy?
Because I’m terrified it’s the latter.
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Meghan kind of talks about her theoretical future husband like he’s a dog, or some other kind of animal that does badass tricks. Essentially obligating him to constantly do what she wants, when she wants it, and never disagree with her even if she’s in the wrong, because then she MIGHT fuck him. Or, uh, excuse me,
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Some KISSES! :D
You like KISSES, don’t you? Who’s a good boy? WHO’S A GOOD BOY? IT’S YOU! YOU’RE A GOOD BOY!
...
[clears throat]
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It doesn’t help that this song is, essentially, just a list of requests and things this guy has to do. So while Meghan can do whatever she wants, her husband is still required to do the traditionalist romance crap like buy her things, lose every argument, hold doors, accept potential insanity, and be “classy”.
Honestly, don’t let Daya and Meghan Trainor do a single together. I think the pain of hearing it will overtake my body. Like that forcible body-wracking feeling you get when you dry heave.
The best part being that I haven’t even touched on the worst line.
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So like, ignoring all of the other shit, if a girlfriend or potential wife said this to me, I’d jump ship. Like, controlling every other aspect of your life wasn’t enough, she also gets to decide what people you see! So if she doesn’t really like your good friend John, then he’s banned from this house forever. And forget about seeing your grandpa. She doesn’t care if he has cancer! You fucking MISOGYNIST PIG! LOVE YOUR WIFE!
Urgh. Of course the song that combines the insanity of What The Hell with the me-me-me attitude of Treat You Better and the bored lack of emotional connection in You Was Right would top this list. I’m glad Meghan Trainor killed her own career in 2016, because I don’t think I’d be able to handle another year of these shitty faux-feminist throwback jams. Thanks, Me Too!
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If I was you, I’d wanna anyone besides me, too!
Also, if anyone’s curious about ratings I’d give these, here you go.
10 - 2/5 stars. Not good enough to be mediocre.
9 - 1.5/5 stars, mostly because Lil Uzi can do better, which is half a saving grace and half a detriment.
8 - 1/5 stars. Ech.
7 - 2/5 stars. I’ll admit the Blurred Lines controversy was blown out of proportion, but it’s still not that great of a song.
6 - 3.5/5 stars. I can get down to this, it’s just... not sexy.
5 - 0/5 stars. RIP Fastball.
4 - .5/5 stars. Only because Shawn’s slurring is funny.
3 - 2/5 stars. At least it’s fun, I guess.
2 - 2.5/5 stars. Again, at least it’s enjoyable if you ignore the words.
1 - 0/5 stars. No more Meghan, please.
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sadbreakfastclubfics ¡ 8 years ago
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i’ll take both | a.a, j.j
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i ‘ l l  t a k e  b o t h
@mattdillpickle: Can I get a Jughead x Archie x Reader smut? Where the reader like Jughead and Archie, and one day they are all at a party at Cheryl’s and they are playing 7 mins in heaven, and Y/N spins the bottle, and it lands on them both, and so Cheryl says they have to go to the bedroom. And the that’s where it goes down? Pretty please???
warnings / smut, mild language
ship / reader x archie x jughead
plot / things get steamy in a seemingly harmless game of seven minutes in heaven. y/n’s bottle spins on both her crushes, jughead and archie, creating quite the dream…
a/n / i know i just wrote a seven minutes in heaven imagine already, but here’s another one! the song i listened to while writing this was fetish by selena gomez ft. gucci mane, i recommend 10/10. thanks for reading!
y/n was down for parties. she never had much free time considering after school activities and her job at pops.
but that’s not why she’s at this party. she heard jughead and archie would be here tonight, and even though the three of them are just friends, she has a major crush on the pair. 
she was going to get a beverage, when she saw jughead sitting alone in the living room. she glided her way from the kitchen to the couch.
“i didn’t think you would come.” y/n said trying to not sound excited. she lied, she totally knew he was coming. due to the fact he had lost some stupid bet with archie.
“technically i’m obligated to.” he chuckled a bit.
“well a party is not a party without a few drinks, that’s the only way i can tolerate half the people here without any fights.” y/n said. jughead was skeptical. “i don’t like drinking. i think there’s enough of that at home.” he looked down at his hands.
y/n felt bad for asking. she knew his household problems, and it wasn’t appropriate. “well surely fruit punch will work.” she tried to sound positive.
jughead half smiled, “i’m pretty sure all the drinks here are spiked. it’s not a big deal.” 
before y/n could reply, cheryl said something about game and everybody gathered around. she quickly noticed archie, very drunk, taking a seat next to jughead. 
“how’s my little juggie doing,” he slurred before scruffing his hair with his knuckles. jughead pulled archie off of him by elbowing him in the ribs. archie let out a small huff before sitting up right again.
the game went by fast and before y/n could blink, it was her turn. she whimpered a soft “oh god.”
“oh god is right, now spin!” cheryl shouted, eager to waste no time.
y/n reached out to the bottle with her shaking hand and poorly painted nails. she spinned very lightly, just hoping it wouldn’t land on someone like reggie or chuck.
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only to her luck, it landed smack dab in the middle of archie and jughead. the whole room let out a gasp, and y/n could feel her palms start to sweat.
cheryl laughed, “do you know what this means? you take both! oh god this is hilarious! janis ian stuck in a closet with a football hunk and donnie darko! you know what, this deserves to be brought up in the bedroom, i mean i only want this to be special for you y/n.”
veronica, betty, and kevin gave y/n sympathetic glances from across he room. and y/n only glared at cheryl, and cheryl made a fake sad face. “now go, we’re waiting!”
y/n slowly got up with jughead and archie following.
the walk to the bedroom felt like such a long time, it was humiliating to be called out like that from a person like cheryl. it’s not helping that she likes the both of them too.
“hey listen, y/n. we don’t have to do anything at all. it’s just seven minutes.” jughead tried to reason, noticing my red face and heavy breathing.
“only if you want to i mean-” jughead interfered, “archie!”
y/n felt like she was going to pass out. archie came closer to her to give her a gentle and sweet kiss. that was the first.
his hands traveled from her waist to her breast, giving a tight squeeze. “okay archie that’s enough.” jughead said trying to pull archie away. y/n didn’t mind at all.
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“it’s fine jughead, really.” y/n said without thinking. this was not her. she was just super horny.
archie was about to pull her back in, but then jughead beat him to it. jughead held her face into her hands before giving her a rough kiss. shivers sent through her spine, the two people she’s been head over heels with, were trying to get with her, but for archie’s sake, he just might be tipsy.
this kiss grew stronger until jughead pushed her onto the bed. archie was on the side of her, trying to take off her top. y/n moaned softly into jughead’s ear as he was giving her small love bites on her neck. not paying attention, she felt archie’s hand go into her pants. he stuck in two fingers in and out, in a slow motion. the pleasure was unbearable to her, she groaned into kissing jughead while her toes started to curl.
jug’s hands went underneath her bra groping her. she felt goosebumps rise, as archie went deeper. she was just about to reach her high until she heard footsteps from the stairs.
she didn’t want to stop, but for the sake of her reputation, she pushed them off quickly retrieving her shirt. archie looked at her confused as the door opened, revealing cheryl.
“i never took you as the screaming type y/n.” cheryl said nonchalantly. “i would’ve never guessed you’d get not one, but two boys down your pants, i have to say i kind of envy you.”
y/n’s cheeks turned red, she didn’t think she was that loud. “now get out we have more rounds to play!” cheryl added before walking out.
y/n closed her eyes, she felt really embarrassed. archie got up and left awkwardly ignoring the weird silence. y/n was about to leave too but then jughead grabbed her arm and whispered, “we are not done here.” 
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hello lovelies💞💞 it was a little rushed at the end, i’ll maybe edit that later. anyway, i really want to do a cheryl imagine next and i just so might… but don’t forget to submit and whatnot, i really want to be as active as possible until school starts! -lilyxx
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thoseguysontheradio ¡ 8 years ago
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MT: WWE Monday Night RAW (4/17/17) Review!
Whatever happened to Roman Reigns? Is Braun Strauman going to fight everyone? Is Kurt Angle still technically the General Manager? Read on to find out in this edition of "Matt Talk!"
Braun talks about ft. Kurt Angle
This was needed more than I thought it was. Kurt Angle needed this moment, because up until this point, he's been behind the scenes, and hasn't done much. Other than making a few matches here and there, he really hasn't added much to RAW. I know some people don't want him getting as involved as Foley did, and I definitely don't want him to turn into "The Authority", but why have a GM character if he isn't going to play any role in day to day match making? This was a good call on their part. I can't wait to see what face Angle is going to do.
Chris Jericho vs Samoa Joe ft. Rollins on Commentary
Its great to see Jericho still around. Obviously, he wasn't leaving the second they announced his rematch with Kevin Owens, but I'm sure this is a dream match that a lot of people are able to scratch off their bucket list. The only two problems with this match is a small botch by Jericho, and Rollins' commentary. The botch was problematic because Joe ended giving Jericho an unintended leg drop when Jericho was supposed to dodge a top rope senton. The reason why Rollins' commentary wasn't the best addition to the match was because we either had commentary focusing too much on his feud with Joe, or he clammed up for most of it. When he did speak, it didn't have a personality or fire to it. I wouldn't say he's bad at commentary, but Rollins' promo afterwards definitely made up for this.
After Joe picked up the win off Jericho, his promo to Rollins was a much needed addition to this feud. We understand why Rollins wants to fight Joe, but not why Joe would want to retaliate. He likes to hurt people, sure, but why not ignore Rollins and move on to someone else? Keeping him as a "hitman" even with Triple H is a smart way of writing him, and it could also mean that other people can hire him in the future.
ELIAS SAMSON SIGHTING #2
The "Drifter" known as Elias Samson was seen playing a guitar near former WWE RAW Tag Team Champions, "The Club."
Braun Strauman beats up fun-loving tag team
He beat up The Golden Truth. There's not much else to say, other than it hurt. A lot.
"Grrrrrrr! I said, 'Everyone!'" -Braun Strauman, 2017
The Club vs Enzo & Cass
Apparently, Strauman beat up The Club's opponents for tonight. I'm always the first one to defend the Brand Split, because both RAW and Smackdown are stacked with talent, both new and old, that have an opportunity to bring a lot of depth to both rosters. Sadly, this is not one of those times. I don't think these four have ever had a bad match with each other, but they've had a lot of matches in recent memory.
And to top it all off, it seems as if one half of the Revival was injured at a house show, and will be out for two months.
Miz TV ft. Ambrose
This os exactly what Ambrose needed. WWE has this problem where they give Superstars whatever title it may be, and they stop giving them promo time completely. Whoever's challenging the champ obviously needs their time to shine, but it definitely hurts face champions in the long run. The characteristics and promos that got crowds invested in these Superstars in the first place seem like they are tossed aside because, "They are the Champ!" This promo solidifyed Ambrose as the Intercontinental Champion.
But let's not take anything away from The Miz, either. I mentioned that this feud happened just last year on Smackdown, yet he is able to make this feud feel fresh and new. Having him be the pursuer, yet acting like he's already the Champion, adds a great layer to what could have been a very stale Smackdown rehash.
Braun Strauman assaults masked individual ft. Big Show
This is one of the worst things you can do to newer talent, and to your Cruiserweight Division. I understand that it sounds like I'm speaking in hyperbole, so let me explain. Braun and Kalisto are both newer talent, but Kalisto is specifically new to RAW, due to the Superstar Shakeup. As all of us can tell, he's a smaller guy. So rumors suggest he's on his way to the Cruiserweight Division. He's been on the house show circuit lately, so a move to RAW looks like it would revitilize his main roster career. Especially if he joins 205 Live. However, how is he going to look on 205 Live, after getting decimated and thrown into the garbage by Strauman? How are the Cruiserweights going to look? You can't build a division and act like they're just like everyone else, when one of the members of said division gets rag dolled by Strauman, even if he is monstrous.
TJ Perkins vs Jack Gallagher ft. Neville and Aries
This match wasn't as good as their showing on 205 Live, but its still a great way to show a wider audience a heel TJ Perkins. While the match itself had both performing going at it in a very Cruiserweight fashion, it devolved into exactly what we saw coming once we had Aries and Neville sitting ringside. Thankfully, Perkins won via cheating, and while I love Gallagher, this can continue their feud, where Gallagher hopefully wins, at Payback.
Titus™ Brand tries to recruit Apollo Crews
While I'm not the biggest fan of Titus' inring style, I am a big fan of the current character Titus is playing. However, I don't think this would be a good first feud for Crews on RAW. Titus' charisma can potentially bring out some hidden charisma from Crews, but I would say the crowd will only care if he looks good in the ring. It might have been better to put him up against someone who is more of a high flyer.
Sasha Banks vs Alexa Bliss vs Mickie James vs Nia Jax
This is why we needed a Brand Split. The fact that we can have these four women in the spot light, able to challenge Bayley for the title, is simply a delight. While I was a big fan of the match, I'm not sure what to think about the outcome. I love that Bliss cheated to get a chance to go after the title, and I do think that she would be a great villain for Bayley, but I wouldn't want Bliss to win the title too quickly, because it feels like she just lost it on Smackdown. Many of you may have heard me voice my displeasure on something similar happening to Kevin Owens with his win over Jericho at Wrestlemania, so I have to be fair and apply the same train of thought here.
Big Show is in the best shape of his life
Big Show was interviewed by Charly Caruso about his attack on Braun Strauman, and said, "I am in the best shape of my life."
Curt Hawkins Star Factory ft. Finn Balor This is a great way to use Hawkins. Fun, delusional heel who gets beat up. I am usually not a fan of squash matches, because it doesn't showcase a wrestler's abilities. Yes, they beat up someone "really good" and "wow, that was so fast", but it usually makes the wrestler look like they can only do the few moves that they used. Thankfully, Finn is so fast and nimble that it actually looked like he bested Hawkins, instead of seeming limited.
ELIAS SAMSON SIGHTING #3
During a fun Chris Jericho interview with Tom Phillips, Elias Sampson appeared. The promo wasn't needed and was simply a rehashing of last week's... until Samson appeared. We will be bringing you more updates on Samson when he appears.
Bray Wyatt Promo
I am ususally a big fan of Bray Wyatt promos, and I can't say that this one is particularly bad, but coming off the heels of the confusing promo he gave last week, it still feels weird. Bray Wyatt, a RAW superstar, can still challenge Randy Orton for his WWE Title, which is a Smackdown Title, at a RAW PPV... WWE, everyone.
Alicia Fox ft. Dana and Emma
I've said in the past that I have no problem with varied characters in every division. Even if some of them, especially in the women's division, are considered "outdated". I say this because there are people that can act like how WWE has written some of the women throughout the years. This, however, is not excusable. There needs to be a healthy balance in the division, where we don't see characters, especially the women, acting "catty" and like children.
Yes, Fox has had her gimmick for a while, but what they're doing with Dana and Emma is absolutely dreadful. This isn't the BFF's from NXT. Emma can be wreaking so much havok as a heel, but she does something like this, and it makes their feud seem so worthless. I know Emma's face character is a (loveable) dork, but that doesn't mean that her heel character needs to do things like that. She needs to seem like a credible threat, and at this point, its not working.  
Jeff Hardy vs Cesaro
This is a match I never foresaw in my PREMONEETIONS, but its still a reality that I am happy to be a part of. Jeff Hardy seems to have a good spring in his step, and it didn't really seem as if Cesaro had to slow down his general pace to wrestle Jeff. The only issue is Jeff winning. Yes, he is one half of the tag team Champions, and he is a future WWE Hall of Famer making his return to WWE, but I just can't see it happening. If there were some kind of shenanigans, I think it would have made it more believable.
Big Show vs Braun Strauman
If this match hadn't happened already, I'd definitely be behind this. I'm not really a huge fan of hoss matches, but Braun is young, and Big Show has been doing some good work as of late, so it would've been a great novelty match if it were being done for the first time. I do have to say, though, while these two have gone at it before, this may be the best match these two have ever had together, and it made them both look great. Even though the "breaking the ring" spot is something that's been done plenty of times over the years, it hasn't been done in a while, so it still gets a rise out of me. Great way to end the night, and its understandable why this was the main event.
We hope you like this edition of "Matt Talk!" Tune in next time, when Matt Talks about WWE Smackdown LIVE!
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royalsports ¡ 4 years ago
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Belgium’s attacking riches bail out creaking back line against Denmark
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On an emotional day Kevin De Bruyne’s advent helped flip the tide however the Belgian defence by no means regarded comfortable
 Perhaps this wasn’t the sport for making right judgments. Belgium had been withinside the desperately awkward function of being the alternative group withinside the face of a fantastic outpouring of Danish emotion, and for 1/2 of the sport they struggled in that function. But the advent of Kevin De Bruyne, again after surgical operation at the facial harm he sustained withinside the Champions League final, modified everything.
 But past speak of the tough emotion of the event or of De Bruyne’s brilliance, there are different problems for Belgium. Going ahead after 1/2 of-time, they regarded just like the face  that had scored forty desires in qualifying. Romelu Lukaku, the isolation of the primary 1/2 of ended, turned into exceptional. But that first 1/2 of uncovered most important issues approximately the defence: the principles are creaking.
The Danish surge, that can have delivered  or 3 desires withinside the starting quarter, did ultimately diminish, however Belgium’s shielding issues remained. Every time Mikkel Damsgaard and his sensitive jinking ft were given a run at him, Vertonghen regarded uneasy. Eventually, it felt, Damsgaard turned into going to get clipped withinside the container or the ball turned into going to fall kindly for him to get a right shot off. Belgium had been lucky it by no means pretty did.
 Martínez has few shielding options: possibly Boyata ought to come in, however he isn't the maximum mobile. The simplest different centre‑again is the 35-year-vintage Thomas Vermaelen. With present day sports activities technological know-how age might also additionally simply be a number, however a few numbers are nevertheless larger than others.
Where there may be De Bruyne, though, there may be hope. As quickly as he got here on, it turned into a distinctive game. Lukaku, remoted withinside the first 1/2 of, had a person to hyperlink to midfield, and inside eleven mins the pair had mixed to put at the equaliser for Thorgan Hazard. The winner, a crisp end from De Bruyne following a slick circulate initiated with the aid of using Lukaku’s run down the right – an intoxicating mixture of bodily strength and deft skill – arrived sixteen mins later.
 The arrival of Eden Hazard and Axel Witsel from the bench, each convalescing from injuries, supplied in addition impetus after the equaliser. Witsel’s presence in the back of the midfield have been especially missed. And but nevertheless there had been Danish opportunities. For all that the momentum regarded to be with Belgium, this turned into now no longer a composed stop to the sport from them. They did now no longer honestly see it out; they'll now no longer pretty had been clinging on however it turned into by no means comfortable, they by no means regarded totally in control.
Thrilling as they had been going ahead, this turned into under no circumstances convincing. In the primary 1/2 of that might possibly be ascribed to circumstance, however now no longer later on. The largest hassle is this facet, in a revolutionary 3-4-3, are designed to attack. Even if Witsel is in shape sufficient to begin from the knockouts onwards, in spite of Lukaku’s capacity because the last in de luxe goal men, bodily strength matched with tempo and tactical and technical capacity, in spite of the magnificence of De Bruyne and Eden Hazard, the again 3 can't take a seat down too deep. It has to hyperlink to the midfield. With 3 gamers of their mid-30s, plus Denayer and Boyata, the dearth of tempo on the again is a chief issue.
 The clock has been ticking in this golden technology for a at the same time as; with 10 gamers elderly 30 or greater withinside the squad (and De Bruyne to show 30 earlier than the final) the alarm might also additionally quickly be going off.
  This turned into, necessarily and pretty rightly, approximately Christian Eriksen, approximately operating via quite a few the anxieties of Saturday and approximately celebrating his survival. And, after that, approximately Denmark getting a win to position them in a function to attain the ultimate sixteen.
 As they got here directly to the pitch Belgium had  functions. The first turned into to be respectful individuals withinside the event – and their gamers will had been affected as well. Lukaku performs with Eriksen at Internazionale, and said: “Chris, live strong, boy, I love you,” right into a digital digicam after scoring in opposition to Russia, at the same time as Toby Alderweireld and Jan Vertonghen had been teammates of Eriksen’s for, respectively, 5 and 6 years at Tottenham. Then, from a soccer factor of view, Belgium’s 2nd challenge turned into to face up to the inevitable adrenal Danish surge.
 But that resistance lasted simplest ninety nine seconds. The most important doubt approximately Roberto Martínez’s facet turned into constantly the getting old defence. Vertonghen is 34 and suffering with an ankle harm, at the same time as Alderweireld is 32. Between them withinside the again 3, Jason Denayer, changing Dedryck Boyata, isn't Vincent Kompany. He does now no longer provide whatever just like the identical composure or authority, and he performed a essential function in Denmark’s opener. It wasn’t a lot his vulnerable byskip out from the again that turned into to blame, despite the fact that that turned into terrible sufficient, because the manner he compounded the hassle with the aid of using being sucked to the ball in looking to rectify the mistake, permitting Pierre‑Emile Højbjerg to put in Yussuf Poulsen to score.
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topbeautifulwomens ¡ 6 years ago
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#Laila #Ali #Biography #Photos #Wallpapers #anime #aztagram #celebrity #fashionshow #happiness #instapic #languagelearning #makeupartist #photography #positive
Laila Ali (born December 30 1977 in Miami Bevery single, Florida) is a professional boxer. She is the daughter of Muhammad Ali and his third wife Veronica Porsche Ali. She was their second child and is the most famous of the nine children born to Muhammad Ali.
Ali has a degree in business from Santa Monica College and previously owned a Balloon and Halloween mask shop in California before becoming a boxer. She is 1.78 m, with a reach of 1.79 m, and weighs around 76 kg.
In her 1st bout, on December 8, 1999, Ali knocked out April Fowler in the first round. She ran off eight wins in a row and a lot of boxing fans started talking about wanting to see her square off in a boxing ring with George Foreman’s daughter, Freeda Foreman, or Joe Frazier’s daughter, Jackie Frazier-Lyde. On the evening of June 8, 2001, Ali and Frazier finally met. The fight was nicknamed Ali/Frazier IV in allusion to their fathers’ famous fight trilogy. Ali won by a majority judges’ decision in eight rounds. It should be noted that she was 16 years younger than Jackie.
After a year’s hiatus, on June 7, 2002 Ali beat Shirvelle Williams in a six-round decision. She won the IBA title with a second-round knockout of Suzette Taylor on August 17 in Las Vegas. On November 9, she retained that title and unified the crown by adding the WIBA and IWBF belts with an eight-round knockout win earlier mentioned her division’s other world champion, Valerie Mahfood, in Las Vegas.
On June 21, 2003, Ali retained the title in a rematch with Mahfood, knocking her out in six rounds. It was announced on June 30, that she would fight Christy Martin on August 23. She beat Martin by a knockout in 4 rounds.
Ali was to begin 2004 by fighting Gwendolyn O’Neil of Guyana at Abuja, Nigeria. The fight was canceled, however, when Ali’s camp learned no airline had flights scheduled to Nigeria on the date she wanted to arrive there.
On July 17 of that year, she retained her world title, knocking out Nikki Eplion in four rounds. Ali missing Eplion four moments before the fight was stopped.
Thirteen days later, she stopped Monica Nunez in nine rounds, in her father’s native city of Louisville. This fight was part of the undercard for the fight in which Mike Tyson was remarkably knocked out by fringe contender Danny Williams
On September 24, 2004, she added the IWBF Light Heavyweight title to her resume by beating O’Neil (whom she had canceled a fight yet against) by a knockout in three rounds, at Atlanta, Georgia. On February 1, 2005 in Atlanta, Ali scored a commanding and decisive eighth round technical knockout over Cassandra Geigger in a ten-round fight.
On June 11, 2005, on the undercard to the Tyson-Kevin McBride fight, Ali pounded Erin Toughill into submission in round three to remain undefeated, and won the World Boxing Council title in addition to defending her WIBA crown. (The Ali-Toughill bout is considered one of the most violent female to female fights in history.) She was the second woman to win a WBC title (Jackie Nava was the first). Toughill and Ali disliked each other, and prior to the fight Toughill joked about Ali. Ali promised she would punish Toughill, much like her father did with Ernie Terrell back in 1967.
On December 17, 2005, in Berlin, Laila fought and defeated Ă…sa Sandell by TKO in the fifth round, marking her 22nd win. The decision was heavily disputed however, and the audience booed Ali during her post-fight interview. While a guest on Quite Frankly with Stephen A. Smith on June 7, 2006, Ali announced that she would be making a world tour, and said that she was looking forward to fighting Ann Wolfe on an October 2006 date. The fight with Wolfe will not materialized. Instead, on November 11, 2006, Ali fought and defeated Shelley Burton by TKO in the fourth round.
Ali was supposed to fight Oâ€Neil again in Cape Town, on August 5, 2006, but she pulled out amid allegations of fraud. In addition, the local promoter couldn’t raise the final $325,000 installment of her $525,000 purse. The South African government is investigating the fraud allegations, according to an exposĂ© in the Cape Times.
On February 3, 2007 in Johannesburg, Ali retained her WBC and WIBA super middleweight world titles, knocking out Gwendolyn O’Neil at 56 seconds of the first round. Ali headlined the first women’s professional boxing match in South Africa. She improved to 24-0. Boxing has also led her into a TV show guest star such as a boxing epesode of George Lopez (TV series)
Name Laila Ali Height 5 ft 10 in Naionality American Date of Birth December 30, 1977 Place of Birth Miami Beach, Florida Famous for Boxing
The post Laila Ali Biography Photos Wallpapers appeared first on Beautiful Women.
source http://topbeautifulwomen.com/laila-ali-biography-photos-wallpapers/
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ultrasfcb-blog ¡ 7 years ago
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England v Spain: Grassroots teaching responsible for lack of English aptitude - Chris Waddle
England v Spain: Grassroots teaching responsible for lack of English aptitude - Chris Waddle
England v Spain: Grassroots teaching responsible for lack of English aptitude – Chris Waddle
Raheem Sterling began six of England’s seven video games on the 2018 World Cup in Russia
England impressed on the World Cup in reaching the semi-finals however regardless of the positives there’s nonetheless an issue in midfield, the place we have not produced a game-changer since Paul Gascoigne in 1996.
You want gamers who could make a distinction by themselves – a maverick, in the event you like. They could have defensive faults they usually would possibly take dangers which individuals don’t love, however I simply suppose these off-the-cuff gamers are what we’d like.
Folks say Raheem Sterling is a quantity 10, historically the gifted artistic participant’s function – however I do not suppose he’s.
He scored 22 objectives final season, however – no disrespect – I’d’ve scored 22 objectives in that Manchester Metropolis crew. Sterling is a large participant who will upset full-backs and chip in, however he isn’t a pure goalscorer and he isn’t a game-changer.
Dele Alli performs behind Harry Kane at Tottenham. He has good motion off the ball and an honest approach, and possibly that’s the approach ahead, however I would not say he’s a game-changer.
Is Jesse Lingard? I would not say so.
After I was taking part in with England we at all times had a wide array of gamers that might affect a sport.
They’ll frustrate they usually do not at all times hearken to the supervisor – however you want that kind of participant to take the subsequent step. We simply do not produce them any extra.
What goes unsuitable?
We’ve acquired the very best services and probably the most cash within the soccer world however, sadly, now we have acquired too many coaches who do not wish to put up with a specific kind of gifted participant – they usually need all people to be dependable.
Coaches don’t love gamers taking dangers as a result of they lose the ball in sure areas. They might reasonably have a participant who cannot dribble however can cross and play a one-two earlier than placing it within the field.
What annoys me most about English soccer is that now we have to pay to import what we used to supply. At my age, we did not go to golf equipment till we had been 13 or 14 – in order that they did not have time to educate it out of you.
Now you convey them in at 5 and 6 they usually lose all of their methods by 10. It isn’t everybody – it is most likely about 90% – nevertheless it’s all about reliability.
In Russia, Gareth Southgate led England to their first World Cup semi-final since 1990
On the continent they have a look at gamers and see what you’ve got. In case you are difficult and intelligent with the ball, they will not take it away – however in England they do.
After I was a participant we had wingers, however that has gone out of the sport as a result of the system has meant central midfielders taking part in on the left or the precise and plodding up and down the flanks with out a lot creativity. They’re trustworthy, they work onerous and they’re good box-to-box gamers who fill in defensively.
I watch video games on the TV now and I see gamers go one-on-one with the full-back – however what do they do? They often try and return to their very own full-back, then they go inside and play a cross throughout the sector as a result of shedding the ball is a criminal offense and they’re scared to take the participant on.
It is a worry issue and I believe coaches are on gamers’ backs in the event that they lose the ball too simply.
You must be courageous as a coach. For those who see a participant from a younger age who can dribble, who’s grasping and egocentric, that can change as he will get older however don’t take the power of beating a person away from him.
These coaches have a look at the highest coaches on the earth and attempt to observe their system. Sure, you possibly can win matches with protected gamers – however to win a event you want danger gamers. We should always have a manufacturing line of them and we must always have too many to select from.
Gazza was an excellent participant that we produced as a result of we let him play. He was very egocentric in his approach, and he performed a sure fashion.
Right now, if a contemporary participant does not see bibs, cones and organisation, they can not suppose for themselves. Whoever is accountable for teaching types and producing gamers has to ask why the web page about taking dangers was ripped out of the handbook?
I bear in mind speaking to the previous Marseille and Serbia midfielder Dragan Stojkovic. He was an exquisite expertise and he instructed me they by no means ran in Belgrade and all the things they did was with the ball. He by no means acquired instructed to play two-touch soccer – and with individuals like that, you simply give them the shirt and inform them to go and play.
How did England’s attacking midfielders fare for his or her golf equipment in 2017-18 in comparison with three of the very best? Title Dribbles accomplished Possibilities created (inc. assists) Raheem Sterling (Man Metropolis) 64 55 Dele Alli (Tottenham) 44 64 Jesse Lingard (Man Utd) 28 26 Eden Hazard (Chelsea) 165 84 Kevin de Bruyne (Man Metropolis) 63 106 Philippe Coutinho (Liverpool/Barcelona) 85 69
Who can fill the void?
We’ve a whole lot of good gamers with good legs who can cross the ball however we’d like a bit extra to go to a different degree.
England supervisor Gareth Southgate picked Liverpool’s Adam Lallana within the squad for the Nations League sport towards Spain, however he has needed to drop out with an harm. He’s technically good, however he needs to be off the leash extra. He has acquired two good ft and he ought to create and rating extra objectives.
When it comes to these outdoors of the squad, individuals discuss West Ham midfielder Jack Wilshere – however he isn’t a artistic participant. He’s tidy on the ball however he isn’t a participant who picks it up and also you say ‘wow, he’s going to take two gamers on and thread it by way of’.
Leicester’s new signing James Maddison appeared good at Manchester United within the Foxes’ first sport after which scored the week after. He seems to be like he has an edge and a swagger about him. I do not suppose he’s frightened about making errors and I am upset he isn’t within the squad for these video games towards Spain and Switzerland.
Nathan Redmond at Southampton can take individuals on and Bournemouth’s Junior Stanislas might play worldwide soccer. He might play in that midfield three as a result of he can create, shoot, dribble and cross.
Will success at junior degree change issues?
We noticed England Under-20s win the World Cup in June 2017 earlier than the under-17s followed suit 4 months later, however our youth groups have loved success earlier than and never most of the gamers have gotten by way of to the senior facet.
From under-16 to under-21 degree, there’s a bodily distinction between gamers and now we have at all times been robust and athletic.
For those who have a look at the dimensions of our age-group sides, it is rather uncommon to see the opposition as huge and robust as us.
For those who converse to our opponents about England, they may discuss energy and legs – however at senior degree, a whole lot of these gamers drop off the radar as a result of they don’t seem to be stronger and faster than everybody else any extra. Everybody else has developed.
Two younger gamers who’ve impressed at junior degree are Manchester Metropolis’s Phil Foden and Jadon Sancho of Borussia Dortmund.
It’s early doorways for Foden however he has acquired a great membership coach in Pep Guardiola to convey it out of him and he will probably be allowed to suppose for himself within the ultimate 30-40 yards. He could have unhealthy days when his reverse quantity will get on high, nevertheless it occurs. I am hoping he will probably be a game-changer.
Sancho has acquired a trick however can he put it collectively and may Southgate be affected person with him? It’s a huge two years for these kind of gamers.
*Chris Waddle was talking to BBC Sport’s Mantej Mann.
BBC Sport – Football ultras_FC_Barcelona
ultras FC Barcelona - https://ultrasfcb.com/football/11837/
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itsworn ¡ 7 years ago
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Drag Test: A Carbon Fiber Driveshaft Really Does Shave ET!
Drag racers are always hunting for an edge. Be it under the hood or elsewhere, they’re always trying to hook harder and run down the track more efficiently. And while increasing horsepower is commonplace, reducing weight and rotational inertia is another sure-fire way to improve acceleration.
In the case of the 2005-present Ford Mustang you can shave weight and go quicker with the install of an aftermarket driveshaft. The S197 (2005-2014) and S550 (2015-2018) Mustangs come equipped with a steel, two-piece driveshaft which does a fantastic job limiting NVH (noise, vibration and harshness), but it’s heavy, (38-40 lbs) and can be a weak link once you add a power or sticky tires.
Car Craft readers may remember our red 2014 Mustang GT tester from a few months ago. We hit the strip with this beauty and ran mid-12s before adding a VMP blower and blasting into the 10s. And while 10s are awesome, we’re certain the increased torque and firm shifts are eventually going to exceed the mechanical limits of the stock driveshaft.
To keep things safe and legal, we swapped a QA1 REV carbon fiber driveshaft that’s designed specifically for late-model Mustangs and can be ordered with or without SFI certification for roughly a $100 difference. “Our REV driveshafts are a truly engineered system from transmission to rear end,” said Dave Goldie, Drag Race Product Manager at QA1. “They can handle up to 1,500 hp with a max rated torque of 1,000 lb-ft. In addition, they feature Spicer Life-series 1350 U-joints, and use a high-speed CV joint with a high-speed sealing boot and high-temp grease. This high-speed capability allows us to minimize effects of NVH while increasing the performance.”
The 2005-2018 Mustang REV-series carbon fiber driveshaft is also a one-piece unit, so it’s very light at just 23.5 lbs. It has outstanding technical features that reduce weight, improve safety, and will make your car quicker on track. And it’s designed to bolt directly into any 2005-present Mustang, including the Shelby GT350.
As we mentioned, the stock driveshaft is a two-piece design. This arrangement allows the factory to virtually eliminate NVH from the driveline, while providing a tight fit under the tunnel. Ford’s driveshaft uses individual front and rear shafts that are coupled by a center bearing joint. The center bearing joint is supported by a hangar that mounts to the floor of the car. As you can imagine, it’s not the best choice for drag racing, road racing, or any application with big power.
“A single-piece driveshaft can be a significant improvement over the stock two-piece shaft,” says QA1’s Goldie. “The auto manufacturers have design criteria including length and diameter that make a single-piece driveshaft pretty much impossible using traditional materials. Automotive designers must adhere to constraints like how close the shaft can be to other components, plus driveshaft cost, and of course, they have concern for NVH. This leads them to a two-piece design that is typically heavy and may include rubber mounting or drive components. In the aftermarket/racing world, these restrictions do not exist and allow the use of larger diameters and alternate materials such as carbon fiber,” he added.
When designing a single-piece driveshaft for newer production vehicles, a major concern is the critical speed of the driveshaft. This is due to the ever-decreasing area around a driveshaft that would allow for a larger diameter. Since diameter is relatively limited, composites are a good solution for higher critical speed encountered in racing and offer a significant weight savings over traditional materials. According to Goldie, a one-piece composite design can save as much as 20 pounds over the stock assembly.
The reduction in rotating weight and the failure mode of carbon fiber results in a significant improvement in safety, too. Additionally, the removal of the rubber components results in a more direct torque transmission to the rear tires and gives the driver a more positive feel.
“Carbon fiber is preferred because it’s the safest and lightest material available to the racing world,” says Goldie. “Most of us have seen the damage that a steel or aluminum driveshaft can do to the cockpit of a racecar. In the unlikely event of a failure, a carbon fiber driveshaft shreds like a broom, so there is no damage to the racer or other parts of the car.”
And to ensure the highest standards in engineering and manufacture, QA1 builds its carbon fiber driveshafts in-house. “QA1 is redefining industry standards by performing our filament winding in-house, in our Lakeville, Minnesota facility,” says Goldie. “This is a necessary process to design and produce the correct torsional stiffness specifications for world-class carbon fiber driveshafts. It is imperative to have control over the entire filament winding process, and by having the specialized equipment in-house, QA1 is able to customize tube length, wall thickness, and pattern, enabling products such as carbon fiber driveshafts to be designed and wound for specific applications.
Install & Test
We turned to Ray Skillman Ford in Greenwood, Indiana where Mustang drag racer Joe Cram handled the job in a couple of hours. Cram was impressed with the QA1 driveshaft and also with the Stifflers’ driveshaft safety loop we brought along. This is a straight-forward installation, assuming you have access to a lift or a jack and jack stands. Air tools are also helpful, especially when dealing with driveshaft bolts.
After installation, which included the Stifflers safety loop, Cram carefully inspected the area around the driveshaft. Carbon fiber is very strong, but it can be damaged easily should it drag across components while spinning. We also noted earlier that the QA1 shaft can be ordered with or without SFI certification, so be sure to check your part numbers if this is important to you. We were glad to have a safe, SFI-approved driveshaft and safety loop under the car, and eager to get to the track and see if the mass reduction helped out elapsed time.
We didn’t have to wait long, as the following day was Wild Wednesday at Lucas Oil Raceway at Indianapolis. Car owner Kevin McKenna has been burning up the track every week, practicing his driving technique and making runs, so we had a great performance baseline. As a side note, the previous best e.t. came earlier in the year at Bradenton Motorsports Park in Florida, where in sea-level conditions the Stang ran 10.79 at 126 mph. But this was summer in Indy at Lucas Oil Raceway (which sits at 856 feet) and corrected altitude during out test was 2,900 ASL. In these conditions, McKenna had been running in the 11.09-11.12 range.
“I’m very pleased,” said McKenna after making three runs. “The car ran 11.04, 11.02 and after a nice cooldown it went 10.99 at 128.45 mph in conditions that were less than favorable, actually 2,900 feet corrected, compared to the seal-level conditions in Florida. Based on similar runs, I’d estimate that the driveshaft was worth a tenth on average. Best of all, the car was noticeably smoother, which makes me wonder if the stock driveshaft was slightly out of balance or perhaps the QA1 unit is just that darned good!”
REV Series carbon fiber driveshafts are made specifically for S197 and S550 Ford Mustangs so they bolt directly into place. They are wound in-house using 3M Matrix Resin in QA1’s Lakeville, Minnesota facility.
Engineered For Critical Speed
Custom manufacturing and winding of carbon fiber tubing allows engineers to achieve the required performance including diameter, torque capacity, torsional stiffness, and critical speed. Dave Goldie of QA1 explained: “Driveshaft diameter is important, but it needs to be considered in conjunction with wall thickness and the type of materials used to make the driveshaft. There is a trade-off in diameter and wall thickness from a torque and critical speed standpoint. Also, the modulus or stiffness of the material plays a significant role in what diameter is desired. In a composite shaft, fibers can be oriented so that a driveshaft can have a relatively small diameter but maintain a high strength and critical speed.”
A properly balanced driveshaft is required for maximum performance and low NVH. Balancing must include U-joints and slip yokes as assembled. QA1 shafts are balanced as an assembly without the use of welded or bonded weights, ensuring a precise and more reliable balance.
This driveshaft was intentionally tested to failure in QA1’s torsion test machine. Unlike steel and aluminum driveshafts, carbon fiber driveshafts will shred like a broom instead of bending. This keeps the driveshaft from becoming a dangerous object in the event of a failure.
To improve our Mustang, we headed to Ray Skillman Ford in Greenwood, Indiana where tech Joe Cram handled the installation.
For added safety, and to remain NHRA-legal, we also picked up a driveshaft safety loop from Stifflers Chassis & Suspension. This unit is lightweight, easy to install, and bolts in with no modifications.
Joe Cram got started by unbolting the mid-pipe under the Mustang. Since the factory H-pipe must be removed, he disconnected and unbolted the O2 sensors, too.
Next, he unbolted the H-pipe at the headers and set it out of the way. With the pipes removed he gained access to the stock driveshaft.
Here’s a look at the rearward mounting flange on the factory shaft. Cram used an impact gun and removed the bolts from the front, then the rear of the driveshaft.
With the front and rear disconnected, he removed the hangar bearing and pulled the driveshaft from the car. If you’re doing this at home, you might want an extra set of hands since the stock shaft weighs roughly 40 lbs.
There’s quite a difference between the two driveshafts: QA1’s REV carbon fiber unit comes in at just 23.5 lbs, which is roughly 17-18 lbs lighter than the factory unit. The improved performance of reduced weight is even greater on rotational inertia, which is where most of the performance increase comes from.
A close-up shows the hangar bearing that connects the front and rear of the factory driveshaft. While this reduces NVH, it has proven to be a weak link in the Mustang’s driveline.
Before installing the QA1 shaft, Cram inspected both the front and rear mounting flanges. A clean, clear surface is important, as debris can cause the new shaft to fit improperly.
The next step was to remove the CV joint adapter plate from the QA1 driveshaft (it comes mounted to the driveshaft for delivery) and install it on the pinion flange.
Aside from the carbon-fiber construction, the QA1 driveshaft features a beefy front mounting flange, Spicer Life-series 1350 U-joints, and a high-speed CV joint with a high-speed sealing boot and high-temp grease.
Cram lifted the carbon fiber haft into place and he tightened it down using the supplied hardware. Note how the new shaft fits nice and tidy in the tunnel of the Mustang.
The Stifflers’ driveshaft safety loop was easy, and took just a few minutes. The first step is to remove the three transmission crossmember bolts, then simply attached the base and snug the bolts. Next, the strap was slipped over the shaft and the bolts installed. You can complete this installation with or without the exhaust in place.
Before driving your car, it’s important to make certain that you have ample clearance between the loop and the driveshaft. As you can image, the QA1 REV carbon fiber driveshaft is very strong, but contact between any brackets, exhaust components, or the safety loop can cause damage to the shaft.
The post Drag Test: A Carbon Fiber Driveshaft Really Does Shave ET! appeared first on Hot Rod Network.
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