#get rekt clockwork

[karurabluew]

"It is. Its just so random, and everywhere you look there's always something just weird...like the giant covered hole in the center of the city."

Which is something he expected from a volcano side island, not a city thats industrial sized and that could only mean one thing. There is something important inside of it.

"Its so obvious something is there."

        ❝ With a... top hat? ❞ danny wasn't quite sure he'd heard the other boy completely right for a second. but, then again, it wasn't like that was the weirdest thing he'd ever heard. far from it. heck, if he encountered a ghost dog with a top hat, he'd probably be more annoyed than anything else. ❝ Uh, no, sorry. Nothing like that. But you are right. ❞ a hand came up to rub the back of danny's neck as he sighed. ❝ This city is super weird. ❞

[schleckermaul]

since it'll be a stellar opportunity for break to meet new people, this is a starter call for spiralefes! i'll most likely hop into your ims to see which setting they're going for, but i'm also adding the ones break is generally interested in:

a roarin' borealis skating rink

pixie perfect treasure hunt (y'all might turn into fox kits)

nerf jousting (get rekt, nerds)

star-den tea party

never-ending extravaganza (where he will be performing a variety of magic tricks for your entertainment)

candy camouflage

there's more, but these are the ones easily accessible to most anybody, previously interacted or not! for now, i'll have this capped at 3, though i might throw out another one eventually. and: clockwork, break's spiramonster, might accompany you.

[tcheschirewrites]

Ya ain't shit, Dale.

RC, Years Later: 

[askjaneandclocky]

laughing jack: my name is laughing jack and im here to kill-

clocky: laughing jack more like laughing jackass

laughing jack: no listen im going to-

jane: you look like the goth lovechild of the joker and pennywise

[meatball-soup]

Incorrect coldharbour compact

Sotha sil: Ladies and Gentlemen, I gather you here today to propose you an offering. I would like to ask you to stay away from nirn in circumstances.

Azura: Okay but what would you offer us in return?

Sotha sil: I have some offerings for you all..

Firstly, dear lady azura, i understand you're still pissed about what happened with Nerevar. sorry, i had to do it to him :(

i know, it gives me crippling depression too you see. But lets say I happened to get my hands on Nerevar's favourite enchanted pants, tho i have no idea where his ring went. I'll also throw in these uh.. steamy paintings of nerevar if you want.. took these from the red mountain.. almost died for these you see.. oh well, You can have it if you want.

Azura: What i wanted is revenge!! Uh.. but this will do for now, i guess. I'll send the nerevarine, just you wait.

What? shut up and just give me those stuffs. >:(

Next is for Boethiah. I got these drama dwemeri tapes about the dwemer-chimer documentation. You'll need this dwemer TV to play them. Quite dramatic, the effects they used in the tape was a bit too much for me, but i think you'll like it. Oh, and also Azura got cameo in like episode 6 or something.

Boethiah: What's with these titles? "Two mer bros fight over big robot (brutal)(people dies)"

"Local chimer plays with forbidden toys (gone wrong)(got killed)"

anyways give me the entire series.

Hermaeus Mora. I have my knowledge to offer you. I can bestow upon you any information that i possess, as what i see apropriate. Aaaand also i made a clockwork toy for your.. uh.. dragonborn pet? I heard he got issues and keeps trying to run away. And oh, here's *that* manga series you have been obsessed for a while.

Hermaeus Mora: How did you know about Miraak— wait, is that the new My Thalmor Academia season 3?!

Great hunter Hircine. I got this clockwork bouncing ball. Uh.. for hunting practice reasons. From my research, werewolfs seems to love it. Keeps em fit and busy. Good exercise. You can also toss it across the hunting grounds and see them compete over it.

Hircine: . . . . . . . . damn cool

Malacath, I found this defect fabricant in my backyard yesterday. Looks absolutely horrible. Seems it was eaten by something. I don't even know how that thing survived.

Thought of recycling it, but maybe you want it.

Malacath: :( what an ugly one... i'll take it.

Molag bal, do you miss your wife?

I've heard rumors across the oblivion that you cried alone every loredas night because your wife took the kids and leave you alo—

i mean i cannot provide you Vivec in person, that would be against his consent,

also it would be a shame if he bites off whats remaining of your—ahem i mean, i have his body pillow printed if you wanted it.

Molag bal: .....Fuck you sil. Anyways i'll take it.

Ah yes. Merhunes dagon. Fuck you in paticular man, i swear by Difayth Fyr's wrinkly old ass if not for the law of this realm i would have slaughtered you, i have years of training in the heart™ power and i have at least one (1) confirmed chimer kill. I even foreseen that one day that you might get rekt by some farm boy priest but im not going into details because fuck you. Your hometown doesn't even look half decent yet you had the nerve to fuss over other peoples hometown? I don't have any offering for you, instead i got you a threat, look, if you don't agree to this pact then i personally will send Almalexia into your realm. I will tell her that you called her ugly and smelly and how you mock her hairdo in front of every other princes.

Merhunes Dagon: .......

.........

... Fuck you sil. I hate you. You false god. Nerd. Orphan. Boo. Lame.

Sotha Sil: Fuck you I hate you too Dagon. Anyways, next and the last one is Sheo—

wait, where's Sheogorath?

Haskill: Pardon my lord, he's out getting some popcorn. He said he want something to chew on while watching the drama happening—

Sheogorath, entering the room: Huh? what did I miss? The drama ended? Bah! ANYWAYS ANYWAYS! Whats your present for me, morta.. uh.. not-so-mortals?

Sotha Sil: ah yes.. i got this.. clockwork city signature cheese. From fabricant cows. Yes. Just for the warning.. it's experimental. Might explode. Maybe causes poisoning. Maybe not. I don't really know myself. Is that even edible?

Sheogorath: SOLD!

HASKILL! OPEN UP~~!!!

[Haskill's remaining spark of life has left his eyes]