#ghvstgrl

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

ghvstmommy? ☣@ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

I know, I don’t like THAT good irl, it’s a filter. But it’s fun and feels artsy. I feel judged when I use a filter like it supposed to be a secret but it’s not a secret we all use filters. It’s like a guilty pleasure? A shameful pleasure. Like sleeping with your ex boyfriend.

[ghvstgrl]

Cute pic of me & my type 💕💀

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

♥ 𝒾'𝓂 𝓇𝑜𝓉𝓉𝑒𝓃 ♥ - - Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

H҉E҉L҉L҉O҉ ҉K҉I҉T҉T҉Y҉ Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣

[ghvstgrl]

Kingslayer

I just have to say this right here, right now.. I have just woken up from a nap on my comfy ass couch in front of the afternoon sun. I took a pee, washed my hands, splashed my face with some cold water and then had 2 bong rips. Now i'm drinking cold water in front of the fan, naked and draped in my favourite black kimono, (lmk if you wanna see a pic). I genuinely and whole heartedly feel connected with my true self, i feel like i have reached the point of self - actualization 

""actualization (also referred to as realization or self-cultivation) can be described as the complete realisation of one’s potential as manifest in peak experiences which involve the full development of one’s abilities and appreciation for life (Maslow, 1962)." - simplypsychology.com" it has been 3 days now since my whole reality turned the lights on. It's almost like, the thread has been removed from my lips and the glue wiped from my eyes. I was heard. I was acknowledged. For anyone who is a survivor, a victim of childhood abuse, To have your matter heard in court and for a magistrate to say " Well Amy, I have read your statement to police, as well as your case files notes. And I just want to be honest with you. And i am satisfied enough that these events did happen to you. Those things should’ve never happened to to you and i'm so sorry no one looked after you." *time slows down*

I'm still pretty speechless about the outcome and how lucky i am. The best way i can describe it.. its like you have been working really hard at a video game and you finally complete the boss level. its pretty surreal. It does however confirm that manifestation, living in the moment as much as you can and being humble and grateful is the perfect ingredient to achieving your dreams. never give up, I like to image on my worst days that my journey is like i'm stuck in a hole and i have a pick axe and i've gotta get myself to the surface or i'll die. And i have been close to dying and giving up many times. It has only been in the last 4 years that I have actually hit what felt like to me, total. rock. bottom. I felt totally naked, vulnerable and scared. I genuinely felt deeply like i was an orphan, i had no family. no friends. My family home i grew up in gone. Both of my grandparents who raised me and took care of me are both gone. I felt like I have lost everything and i had nothing. But I never gave up on myself, on seeing things through to the end. I have transformed from one stage of my life, the last 2 decades, now being reborn into my next stage of my journey. I look different, i feel different and i see myself in a whole new light. I feel about myself in a whole new way and I am seeing the world for what feels like for the first time. There is a lot here so for those who don't wanna read it all TLDR; VERSION: - I am a bad bitch, who can't die, who want give up.

[ghvstgrl]

Picture not mine. ☣ @ghvstgrl ☣