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OKAY im posting this crappy wip kubosai one-shot because ive been lagging severely on writing... sorry if its cringe, its completely unedited rn</3
this is roughly 1800 words.. the actual wip is about 4000 LOL but i skipped a couple parts so this is about half the wip i guess..
Kusuo was sitting at his desk with his legs curled to his chest, glaring at nothing, when his phone dinged next to him. Already not in the best mood, he sneered as his eyes snapped over to the device. The noise had disturbed one of his favorite pastimes; being moody for no reason and doing nothing, and the bright light was equally disturbing. When he looked over, it also shone the time as "1:36am" which ruined his blissful unawareness of how long he'd been brooding. His unusually accurate internal clock could have told him that, really, but Kusuo would never pass up an opportunity to be mad about something stupid.
His eyes softened significantly when he caught sight of what the notification actually was. A text from contact name "Kuboyasu Aren" with no contact picture. Yeah, that was how Kusuo kept all his contacts. Super boring and super normal.
He clenched his teeth, trying to bring his anger from before back after realizing how much and how easily his mood lifted just reading his classmate's name.
His phone had gone back to a black screen before Kusuo could read the actual contents of the message, so he begrudgingly unfurled himself from his position with a heavy sigh. He planted his feet back on the floor just a bit too aggressively and swiped up his phone as he stomped over to his bed to flop himself down on it.
When he finally turned his phone back on, the notification read “3m ago” and he clicked on it.
The message read, “hey princess when u wake up do u wanna hangout ??!? could i come overrr tomorrow please”
Annoying lack and misuse of punctuation, but Kusuo has learned that this tends to be the norm in texting, especially with other teenagers. In all fairness, the way Kusuo texts isn't very conventional either. He made fun of Toritsuka’s severe overuse of emojis once, and then immediately got ganged up on by all of the self proclaimed ‘PK psychickers’ because he tends to overuse emoticons in the same way. He doesn't know how else to express himself over text, alright? He learned to text only from his mom, Akechi, and Aiura and this is just how it turned out.
And for your information, the stupid princess pet name was just some silly thing Kuboyasu had gotten in the habit of doing lately. Trust Kusuo when he says it's much more embarrassing when he says it out loud, especially at school, than when he texts it, though knowing that his name in Kuboyasu’s contacts was “My Princess :)” was probably even worse.
Anyway, Kuboyasu had clearly made the assumption that Kusuo would be sleeping at this hour. Well, usually he would be. Kusuo LOVES getting his sleep in, but he just so happened to have taken a very long nap earlier that day, so he had a late dinner, and subsequently a late dessert. So, his usually abnormally fast metabolism hadn't quite been rid of all the sugar and caffeine he'd consumed not long ago. A series of unfortunate events, really, which culminated in him not being tired enough to sleep yet. At least he got to get in his usual ‘angrily staring at nothing for no reason’ time that he accidentally skipped because of his nap, although that did just get interrupted too.
So finally, he responded to Kuboyasu with, “I'm awake. (-.-;) Sure, I guess.”
Kuboyasu read the message and began typing unnervingly quickly after it was sent. “really ?!?!? also y r u awake lol i thought u would be asleep hours ago”
The poor guy probably wasn't expecting him to say yes immediately. Kusuo usually would argue about it for a bit before giving in to the teasing and pleading of his self proclaimed friends. It was way too late (/early) to play that game right now though, he knew he would just say yes in the end anyway. It had nothing to do with him actually wanting to see the dumb former punk who he had been unusually close with lately.
The taller boy just GOT him in a way other people never did. His undying loyalty and honesty was a refreshing contrast from many of the other people the psychic was often forced to be around. Loyal, honest, strong, romantic, protective. Not that those last few things affected the way he interacted with Kusuo or anything…
Kusuo replied again, “Yes. And I usually would be, but… too much caffeine. ( ̄^ ̄)”
Another quick response, “lol thats totally something u would do.. since ur up, r u down to call right now ?”
“To call? It's almost 2am. ಠ_ಠ Why are YOU awake anyway?”
“lol i know i know but im so bored… i just cant sleep.. we can be quiet on the call, but id like to hear ur voice right now :)”
Good grief, ew. How disgusting. “Hm… okay. ∩(。-_-。)∩”
(Don't you dare ask Kusuo why his internal monologue is so different from what he actually replies with. It's definitely not because he's an unreliable narrator who doesn't want to admit to himself or anyone that he actually wants to talk to a boy. Why would that be the case? Don't be dumb.)
Kusuo forgot to turn his ringer off before Kuboyasu could call him, so despite entirely expecting the phone call, the loud ringing startled him into dropping his phone on his face. How embarrassing, all-powerful psychic drops his phone on his face at almost 2am.
He scrambled to pick it back up and answer it so that the noise wouldn't wake up his parents. It would be really easy for him to just lull them back to sleep with his telepathy the second they wake up, but it would be inconvenient and his dad might complain in the morning. About either remembering waking up or just about not getting a good night’s sleep.
He finally clicked the answer button, luckily before his parents could wake up, and held back a sigh as he held the phone up to his ear.
“Hey, princess!” Kuboyasu was speaking in a whisper yell, probably also a room away from his sleeping parents.
“Hello.” He tried to speak in a way that wouldn't give away the fact that he was recovering from a smack to the face. Phone calls were a bit awkward for Kusuo, since microphones didn't pick up on his telepathy so he had to use his actual voice to speak over the phone. He always just hoped people wouldn't notice the extra rasp to his voice, but the late hour might work in his favor in this situation.
“So what have you been up to?”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing? Up at 2 am and you're just sitting there, doing nothing?”
“Yes, that's exactly what I've been doing. What else is there to do at 2am?”
“Well, I've been making the most of MY time, personally.”
“And how have you been doing that, exactly?”
“Thinkin’ about you.”
“...”
“...”
“... *snort*” Okay, how could that NOT make him laugh? He took the phone slightly away from his face and laughed into his hand.
“What?? It's true!” The idiot couldn't hold back his laughter either.
“Yeah, yeah, okay… whatever, you're such a pain…”
“Yeah? Am I?”
“Yes.”
“And yet, you're here talking to me at 2 am just because I asked you to? Admit it, you love it.”
“Tch. You really need to get over yourself, you know that?”
“Well. Humor me for a bit longer, will you?”
“You're desperate.”
“For you.”
Kusuo muttered into his hand, “Oh my god.”
“I wish I could see your face right now, I know you're blushing.”
“Yeah, right. Not like you can prove that.”
“You want me to?”
“What do you mean?”
“You want me to come over there and check?”
Kusuo could hear the smirk in Kuboyasu’s voice. The jerk knew Kusuo couldn't say no to him. They both knew this game. Kusuo would deny him just for show, even though they both know he wants to say yes, and Kuboyasu would tease the truth out of him. Well, fine. Kusuo could play this game.
“You want to sneak out of your house and into mine at 2am just so you can check how successful your teasing is?”
“Mhm. Not just that, I would do anything to see my pretty princess’ face right now. I'm bored, you're bored, the only solution is for the knight to rescue the princess from this ailment, obviously.”
“You're an idiot.”
“You want to see me, I know it.” And he did. Kusuo could hear shuffling over the phone. That asshole was probably already putting his shoes on, knowing Kusuo would say yes. “What, you scared to prove me right? You don't want me to see your pretty pink face right now?”
… Kuboyasu was good at this game. He knows that husky voice is fucking irresistible. To Kusuo, at least. “... Okay, okay. Only so I can prove you WRONG.”
He knew Kuboyasu was smiling, but then the mood settled a bit. “You serious, Saiki? I know I'm messing with you, but I won't pressure you if you don't wanna sneak me in. I mean, that's kinda a lot to ask now that I'm thinkin’ about it. I really wanna see you, but I wouldn't make you do that.”
“Yeah, yeah, shut up, I've already made up my mind. Are YOU sure? You realize how late and dark it is, yeah? You can't just stroll the streets at 2 am, you're gonna get hurt.”
“Awee, you worried about me, princess? No need, your knight in shining armor can protect himself just fine.”
"... Fine. Just stay on the phone with me."
"Hm? While I walk?"
He figured Kuboyasu wouldn't want to have a conversation over the phone in favor of paying attention to his surroundings, but... Kusuo couldn't help but be nervous about his friend's safety at this hour. He just wanted to make sure he was fine the whole walk.
"We don't have to talk, just... stay on the phone with me..."
Kuboyasu snorted. "What, you gonna miss me in those, what, ten whole minutes?"
Kusuo scoffed quietly. "Don't be so full of yourself. I'm just making sure you don't trip and fall or something at 2am on the way to my house. Wouldn't want the blame to fall back on me." He somehow still managed to convey snark in his almost monotone voice despite his whisper.
Kuboyasu chuckled softly, as he snarked back teasingly, "You know I can take care of myself. Can't believe you're still worried about me~."
Kusuo did know that. It didn't change anything. And he WASN'T worried, he just knew that his various nuisances tended to get into trouble when he wasn't there to monitor them. He was always getting them out of trouble even in broad daylight, so there was absolutely no reason to think that walking alone in the middle of the night would prove to be an exception.
"Just shut up and don't hang up, alright?"
He heard the quiet creak of a door closing and shutting, barely drowning out Kuboyasu’s attempt at muffling his laughter. "Alright, sweet boy. I'm right here."
-
EWWWW CRINGEE EW THEY HAVE COOTIES
#this is so cringe its crazy#maybe a little ooc idk u cant judge its totally unedited#im also not going to read it before i post this so last time i reas this part was like a week ago um hope its not too embarrassing#kubosai featuring kuboyasus shit fuckin rizz#i hate him#(lying)#also i dont have a title for this#but my other wips are named after mitski songs lol#gotta follow the pattern#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusuo#kuboyasu aren#kubosai#meows post#meow writes#<-idk if ill ever use that tag again but im putting it here so this doesnt get buried
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Batfam AU where Jason never dies, so Tim doesn't join the family the standard way. Instead, he continues pouring most of his time and energy into his photography, eventually becoming known as a popular photographer for events and all that. So now, picture this: Tim gets hired to be a photographer for a Wayne gala. Obviously, he's ecstatic, because he can take pictures of Batman, Robin and Nightwing and be in their presence for a whole night. Since Tim is so naturally talented in stealth and taking pictures unnoticed, the second one of the fam realises this they're like: this kid is good. Tim manages to go unnoticed by all 3 of them (all bat-trained, one literally batman) multiple times during the night, and even when he is noticed, he disappears before they can manage to get a good look at him; to the sheer amazement of Dick and Jason.
Jason, (very discreetly putting snacks in his suit pocket): i know you're under the table, kid.
Tim: don't mind me, Mr. Todd-Wayne, sir, just taking a few pictures
Jason: right... Jason's fine, and what pictures were you taking from under the table?!
Tim, showing him perfectly good shots of him: these.
Jason: how did you get that. it looks like you took it from the rafters
Tim, nodding: I did.
Jason, glancing at the ceiling: ...what?
Tim, gone:
Jason: no fucking way.
Dick, hearing a very, very faint camera shutter from behind him:
Dick, turning around and finding no one there: what the actual...
Dick, getting the feeling of being watched and whirling around to find Tim staring at him from across the room: ... huh.
Jason, pulling Dick aside: you see that kid too, right?!
Dick, nodding: the camera kid, yeah?
Jason: who is that.
Dick: he's one of the hired photographers, apparently. one of the best in his field, despite his age.
Jason: he's good. like, really good. snuck up on me 4 times already, the little bastard.
Dick: you too? i swear he's constantly watching. it's creepy how well he can sneak past both of us.
Jason:
Dick:
Jason: you don't think...
Dick: no. B would've told us.
Jason:
Dick:
Dick: did he get another kid and not tell us somehow
Bruce: what do you mean another kid?
Jason: you heard us. did you adopt another kid and not tell us?!
Bruce: no?? how would I even?? ... what's this about?
Dick: one of the photographers has managed to sneak up on both me and Jay multiple times already
Bruce: what.
Jason: he also can't be more than like. 15 or 16. so forgive us for assuming you took another one in.
Bruce: do you know his name?
Dick:
Jason:
Bruce: really?
Dick: in our defence, he's very hard to catch. i wouldn't be surprised if he's snuck up on you, too.
[camera shutter noise]
All of them, whipping their heads toward the sound only to find nothing but air:
Tim, smiling from the other side of the room:
Jason: do you see what we mean?!
Cue an entire night of shenanigans where it's just Dick, Jason and Bruce trying to catch Tim and learn about him. Upon finding out who he is and where he lives, Dick immediately asks to keep him as an honorary member of the family. Jason is hesitant at first but at some point Tim calls Bruce Batman instead of Mr. Wayne on accident and Jason laughs so hard he's basically won over. Bruce can do nothing but watch as Tim proceeds to come over almost every night for sleepovers and is coddled by both of his sons. And he can't deny, the kid's investigation and stealth skills are top tier. By the time Dick and Jason both start referring to Tim as 'their younger brother' Bruce has just accepted his fate.
#batfam#batman#dc comics#tim drake#bruce wayne#jason todd#dick grayson#batfam au#dick: look he's even got the dark hair and blue eyes#jason: he fits the pattern. you gotta#dick to tim: you are ours now#tim who just wanted to spend time with his heroes: oh#they declare him as theirs so he is theirs#bruce does not get a choice#he is THEIR little stalker#when jason finds out that tim follows them as vigilantes too he falls over laughing#dick wiping a tear away: he's perfect
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Fig's line "I don't think I'm an artist, I think I'm just a good friend" has not left my head at all. Just...
You're Fig Faeth and your horns came in over the summer and you pick up the bard class as a form of adolescent rock 'n' roll rebellion, and it works! It's exactly the outlet you need! You give a guy you just met drumsticks and you start a band and it's good enough that within a year and a half you're touring. You are, in every sense, good at being a bard.
And then, finally, your junior year, you start to take it seriously. Your art goes from an outlet and a form of rebellion to a practice. A discipline. (Can rebellion exist within a discipline?) Your classmates know what they want to do with their work. They all have a thesis statement. And yeah, there's cohesion in the music you make, but you've never had to think about why you make it. You've never sat down and dissected what it is about bass that speaks to you. You've never poured over your lyrics to pick at any deeper meaning. Why should you? You don't play music for a grand design, you do it to... huh, why do you do it?
(Your art is the one form of self-expression that feels as safe as Disguise Self does, because even if you're pouring your heart onto the page and then screaming it in front of thousands of people, it's not like you're really making yourself known. You can sing I'm lonely, I'm scared, I'm furious, and your fans will sing it right back, and there will still be the distance between performer and audience to keep your heart safe.)
Now you're being asked to look inward to explain the artistic choices you're making, and you can't help but recoil at that, because you'd rather do anything than look inward. Meanwhile, your classmates have no problem with it, so you start to wonder if you're a real artist at all. Can your art be authentic if it only exists to bolster a thesis statement? Has your art been unauthentic this whole time because you've never really thought about a thesis statement before? Is that what makes it art, and not just the next track on somebody's teen angst playlist?
You can't think about yourself— acknowledging your own existence makes you want to puke. So if your music is an extension of yourself, (and it is, even if it's just because the spotlight reveals only what you want it to,) you can't think about your music. You can't. You have to. Your grade depends on it.
You're Fig Faeth, and you keep multiclassing because you'd rather be a good friend than a great artist. If introspection is what great art demands, then fuck it. You must not be a bard at all.
#Dimension 20#fig faeth#fhjy#Idle Chatter#my last two years of college were when I started to get more and more nauseous about my own art#because I wasn't being taught how to make the art I wanted to make#the whole curriculum's focus was on gallery art#which infuriated me! I wanted to make art that didn't have to involve twelve layers of meaning and metaphor to be considered good!!#so I drove myself into the ground time and again trying to make (miserable) work that I thought would fit the criteria of a Real Artist#anyway it's been 4 years and I'm just now picking at why I don't enjoy creating anymore so Fig's whole arc has hit home in a major way#ALSO. AAAAALSO. THE ADHD STRUGGLE WE SEE WITH BOTH FIG AND KRISTEN. LOVING SOMETHING BUT STILL STRUGGLING WITH FOLLOW THROUGH#BEING TOLD YOU'RE NOT DOING ENOUGH WHEN IT'S SO FUCKING HARD JUST TO GET WHERE EVERYONE ELSE IS AND NOT UNDERSTANDING WHY IT'S HARD FOR YOU#it was easy and now that the rubber's hit the road it's hard for you but not for others so it must be YOU that's the problem#you must be lazy or stupid or just not suited to this after all even though it's part of a pattern that has been happening all your life#if you were good enough or cared enough then surely the discipline would come easily to you! the way it comes easily to all your classmates#SCREAMS I gotta stop before I write a second essay in the tags. I'm so normal you can trust me to be normal about D&D characters
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just thinking again about the difficulty of achieving actual escape velocity from the womenswear standard of Pervasive Negative Ease…
#an extremely 2015 post brought to you by an extremely 2015 experience#namely 'someone i follow posting an outfit pic with vibes describable as ~dapperqueer~'#except that like. the trousers were by menswear standards pretty noticeably too tight#which is something i used to notice all the time with transmasc* outfit bloggers back in the day—#just that like‚ esp by comparison with the rest of the outfit‚ the pants would just be disproportionately painted on—#and like. idk. on an individual level you Gotta not hyperscrutinize people's individual choices. you just Gotta.#but systemically it just really points up like.#a way in which 'girls' get trained to shy away from ever wearing anything that might visually bulk up their body#such that their perceptions of what 'fit' means become totally skewed#by comparison with any standard that respects like. freedom of movement for both you and the fabric you're inhabiting#ditto the way so many knitters make these intensely Shaped and frankly shrunken sweaters#and like. idk. that's not my style‚ i love a good british-fisherman shapeless sack look‚ but you do you!#but like. do you not want‚ like‚ enough room to at least fit a shirt under??#but like. the body Must Be Contained.#anyway obviously it's hard bc like. lord knows with trans fashion you're always like. trying to strike a balance between things that Fit#vs things that like. seem to you to help create a gender-affirming visual illusion even if they're in material tension with your body#(and also like. 'nonbinary' isn't in fact 'just doing the Opposite thing'! the freedom to pick and choose is part of the point!)#but at the same time. on a broader level. Patterns Do Emerge…#anyway really i'm just mad bc i'm thinking abt like. clothes i bought in too small a size#bc of my bad mind-warping training#and how i'm STILL‚ even now‚ struggling to accept eg the birk size that all metrics agree i should be#because something in my brain is like. wow those sure are some boats down at the end of your hairy calves!#which is making me feel murderous bc like. i love my leg hair passionately actually! and i deserve to have room for my toes to wiggle!!#like. goddamn. can we take up space!!!#anyway. like i said. some *extremely* 2015 nonbinary feminism feels…#(probably a bad and humiliating post to make but what is a perblog for if not. bad and humiliating posts.)
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I feel like I've seen this season before
#afl#port adelaide#carlton#hawthorn#geelong#sorry for my carlton followers catching strays BUT YOU GOTTA ADMIT ITS A PATTERN#after how crazy this season it's wild that we've basically reverted back to the same finals iteration we've seen multiple times this centur
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can’t make vent posts on here anymore cause i keep remembering the one time i did while i was spiraling about being a terrible person and everyone hating me and that i was worried i would ruin all my relationships and i just got comments going “yeah probably! but here’s (unasked for criticism and advice aimed at a literal stranger)” like yup that happened
#just a friendly reminder that i am stranger to most of y’all#like i love y’all but if we’ve never talked and you’re making judgments on my character like that#while following me???#also maybe don’t affirm peoples negative thought patterns in their vent posts#or leave advice on vent posts#like most of us just don’t have another place to get shit out we’re not looking for advice on here#i’ll go to my friends or a professional for help#i just gotta get it all out here sometimes when that’s not an option#personal.txt
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so...the janus family and discord will one day be a part of an actual slenderverse series
:)
#:)#leaving it at that#the lore will be a bit different but still following the whole dakota and trinity are being hunted bc theyre nephilims thing#omg im basically doing game fnaf vs movie fnaf#except its rp vs source material (that doesnt fully exist yet)#omg i gotta make or get a fursuit#making it will probably be cheaper but i suck at patterns and sewing#>:(
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Oh also we got together with some friends and we all hung out n did crafts for an entire afternoon the other day n it was so fun and chill AND

I finished all the pieces for my cardigan!
I’m gonna try n block it a little so the edges dont curl as much but!!! Cardigan!!! Almost wearable!!!
#personal tag#its like. cheap acrylic yarn so idk how nice it’ll be to wea#but i made this specifically so i could have like. a kind of baseline on how long a project like this would take/what issues i would bump in#i have learned that i do not ever want to leave the back panel for last again oh my god.#i cant let myself do that to myself again i can not give myself the longest n biggest piece for last#the sleeves r also different bc i lowkey followed a youtube knitter’s first pattern#but the first sleeve i made felt a little too balloon-y? so i did like one less row of increases on the second sleeve n that feels nicer#so yeah! this was always meant to be a tryout cardigan. to learn n assess n such#AND I FINISHED ALL THE PIECES OF IT!!!#i started it in late November i believe#and now i just gotta. block it. and learn how to sew it together. and do that. and then it’ll be done
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still got an occasional gross cough and a bunch of anxiety over being back at work with a certain horribly exhausting person but prolonging the stress will prob make it worse so I might as well go back to work tomorrow.
I stress cleaned everything in my flat today except the piles of washed clothes and unwashed dishes so things are back to normal once more, and then I sorted out all the stuff for upcoming project + exam prep and packed my bag for tomorrow and laid out clothes so I'm as ready as I can be.
gonna be exhausted tho bc it's already 11 pm and I gotta be up by 4:30 am at the latest if I wanna be at work at my usual time. I don't have to be there at 6:30, I could go there at 9 or 10 even but then I would have to stay late and deal with people right away, which is a strong hell nah for me
#we'll see how it goes. if I end ul feeling like utter shit in the morning or the cough gets worse again as it has been kinda#then I'll just divert to going to the doc instead. maybe ask for another day or two. it'll be a short week anyway#since the 3rd is a national holiday and most ppl will take the following day off to have a long weekend#so we'll see. gonna go with my gut on this. either way. and try to fight against the anxiety bc it'll just escalate again if I let it#today was proof enough of that. cleaning the entire place bc of nervous energy is a clear sign that I'm not doing so hot#but as therapy teaches you: recognising the pattern is the first step in changing it. so all that's left is adjusting behaviour#can't fix her attitude and her lack of care about anyone else and her disregard of other people's emotions#all I can do is focus on the rest of the bunch bc they're wonderful folks and on the work since there's plenty to do#esp with the project time starting now. I really gotta get on that. I have a week and a half to figure out the practical aspects etc#and I'm sure I'll be returning to a bunch of emails and messages and unfinished tasks rip#all the more reason to be there early as usual so I can take some time to get back on track#a day in the life of..
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hadn’t really regressed in a While and i didn’t realize how much i missed/dareisay needed it until i had the free time and ability to do so over the last few days and i have to say. i’m feeling a bit better
#imagine that! the coping mechanism… helps!!! wow#Seven’s Small Thoughts#not tagging this as anything else bc this blog is really just a not-so-secret public diary#and im not really trying to gain any sort of following or participate in the community very much#i just wanna talk to the void abt regression every once in a blue moon y’know#i also feel like i don’t really belong in the community much/am not a Good Example of sfw agere since i’m very n/ s/ f/ w everywhere else#which is a double standard that i don’t hold others to but i feel like others will hold it against me??? and i’m just shy anyways#and not looking to interact. just wanna keep all this stuff tucked away in a side-blog#i also feel like a lot of the community likes to blog while actively regressed and i don’t wanna step in there as someone who isn’t#nothing wrong with it! at all! i just don’t have the capacity to since i go nonverbal when i regress. no thoughts head blissfully empty#anyways this wasn’t supposed to be a vent post let’s change the topic!#anywhooo what else did i come on here to say. oh yeah#i lowkey forgot how much regressing has helped me in the past until i was able to really indulge myself in it again recently#it’s so nice to just be small and hand someone else the reins and forget abt everything other than doing something you enjoy#maybe one day i’ll be at a point in my life where i can fully regress more freely and more often but for now i’ll take what i can get#i’m also excited because i’ve been thinking abt ordering a paci from this one specific seller#and yesterday saw that they’re dropping a new batch of fall/halloween themed ones today!!!#so now i’ve gotta make myself stay awake until 6pm so i can jump on it when they’re available#which is a small struggle considering my nocturnal sleep schedule but i will do it nonetheless#that crescent moon patterned one Will Be Mine#trying to decide between buttercup yellow and schoolbus yellow for the clip#i think i’m more drawn to the vibrancy of the schoolbus yellow honestly#eeeeeee i’m excited i’ve been wanting to treat myself to ordering from this shop for a g e s and im finally gonna do it
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Not me staying up late to draft some more patterns.
Nope. Nothing like that. Never.
#SOMEDAY I will have a job that allows me to follow my natural sleep schedule#Whether that is my day-job-that-I-need-to-survive or pattern-drafting-as-a-career remains to be seen#Tho my immediate boss is okay with me work overnight again#Just gotta get it past the corporate backstage overlords 🙄#pattern drafting#Athene abstracts
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24 days left. I shouldn't be excited for this to be over soon but gotta be honest. Mental health wise not my best few months. Kinda glad to go home soon
#it's really just the eating problem#that's the main thing ruining my life lol#kinda pathetic#i end up literally crying like every other day because i fucked up a perfectly good 'healthy' eating pattern i developed the past 4 years#and can't seem to get over it#and i know it's probably gonna follow me home but a part of me still wants to believe things will just go back to being okay#once I'm back and can exercise the way i want and eat what i want again#and of course also have some mental support and things to focus on other than obsessing over food and body issues#(i.e. my wonderful sweet little baby dogs who i love more than life and who definitely will fix Everything)#i just gotta try to make it through these last 3 weeks with minimal damage#it's literally fine#void screams
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edit: fun fact! i tried to save this as a draft halfway through my tag rambling only to find it physically refused to save anymore tags (will probably make my own post to rant about the tragedy of these two later)
nintendo pls i just want them to be happy
#totk#totk spoilers#these two are gonna have separation anxiety#link *died*#zelda *watched* him die; to take a hit for her#he spent 100 years in a coma and she still waited for him; believed in him; missed him#he lost her so badly he didn't even know her *name* but he still risked his life to reach her#based on nothing more than a voice he heard on the wind and scattered memories#and even though link didn't come back the same; they were *together* again#he stayed by her side as they worked together and with their remaining friends; old and new; to restore this kingdom they had#already done so so much for#they were *living* together; settling down. she stole his old hair tie#and he was willing to follow her to the ends of the earth; deep into the underground#and then zelda got to watch him almost die again#saving her again#and link chased her all through hyrule#again following nothing more than a voice on the wind#and it was a curse. an illusion pretending to be the thing he loved#and when he finally pieced together what had happened to her; realized what she had become#he could visit her; run a hand through her hair; trace patterns in her scales#but this time she wouldn't remember him#zelda spent centuries just *waiting* for him to find her#and once again she just had to believe he would be able to do what their predecessors couldn't#win a fight against the man who defeated six of the strongest beings of an era#buying time for her swordsman again#i can only imagine what they could accomplish together#but destiny itself seems dead set on tearing them apart at the fist sign of danger#that's gotta leave a mark#if link takes his eyes off her for a moment will she be replaced by a puppet that mocks her being?#if zelda strays to far will he be able to find her again?
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If you ever happen to see me walking and for whatever reason you happen to look long enough to be making observations and those observations happen to be that I'm staring at the ground just ahead of me, moving at an inconsistent pace, seeming to jolt at random moments due to suddenly switching from long adult strides to "toddler learning the stairs meets choir kid" step-together-step-together, then shhhhhhhhhhh....no you didn'ttttttt
Cause you see there's a feral neurodivergence goblin running wild in my brain who's a big fan of "oooo shiny!", and if something catches its eye it locks in, and if it becomes aware of my feet + any cracks, colors, textures, or different materials I'm walking on that will be the only thing it can focus on until said feet stop moving. So you see in order to appease the beast each foot needs to step on each area of Different™ and in an equal amount or in a consistent, balanced, alternating pattern that ensures an equal number of steps on Different™. Because if one foot steps on something that the other doesn't that foot feels 𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜 and the goblin will continue to state that it is 𝙬𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜, that it is ��𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣, that it is 𝙙𝙞𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩 on a non stop loop until it is rightfully evened out by completing the missing step or an acceptable substitute balancing step is agreed upon, and trust me, you don't want to be part of those negotiations.
Signed,
A person who has been sat down for half an hour yet can still feel one yellowish carpet foot and one purplish carpet foot distinctly
#one foot can't go concrete brick concrete while the other goes concrete concrete -are you nuts?!#unless the walkway has a repeating pattern of strips and you immediately follow up with concrete concrete and concrete brick concrete (obvi)#and don't even get me started on the little bumpy panels on each side of a crosswalk#but you also need to factor in which foot you step with first because it will make or break a successful walk pattern#not to mention all that goes into having to on the spot adapt your approach to correct or accommodate new factors#........ this is probably the type of thing i should have brought up when i was being considered for ocd#i didn't get diagnosed ocd btw; my therapist said i had obsessive tendencies but not really the compulsive criteria#she still might be write but then i do things like this and i wonder if maybe i just didn't share enough examples#what do you mean no one else is thinking like this#you don't come to this completely rational conclusion that this is the Correct™ way and therefore only choice?#you're telling me you grab a cold door knob with one hand and just carry on?? you don't grab it with the other for equal cold???#you just roll with the feeling of utter imbalance with no guaranteeing it evens out yet I'm the strange one??#living on a college campus has made me so much more aware of how much i do this#like why did you have to make the floor out of so so many different floors? why must you mix the floors so much?#this is bare minimum finally voicing this monologue I've had with myself countless times to the possibility of an audience#but like statistically someone out there probably has gotta relate- right?#astertings#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#monkey brain
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Started swatching for a crochet sweater and doing the math to let my gauge match one of the preexisting sizes and (A) there are three gauges for this pattern and I cannot meet any of them aldkjdjfkffjrj and (B) the math for the sizing with the pre-existing gauge doesn't make sense to me 🙃
#dryad speaks#dryad dabbles#i almost never meet gauge which is why i didn't used to test my gauges but uh that's not always a good strategy#so now MATH and PROPORTIONS can give me GREAT ANSWERS#but not when the proportions for the sizes don't follow the math in the original pattern >.>;;#sooooo I might just be winging it#i always gotta make my crafts more complicated than necessary lmao
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Atta Girl
old jackson!joel miller x younger fem!reader
summary: joel miller discovers the world, yes, the same world that has gone (been for a while) to shit, can still have surprises. like you, his sweet naive unexperienced girlfriend, being everything but that.
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (old joel miller my GILF!), smut, sighs this is pwp who am i lying to, inexperienced!reader (yet for some reason she's a pro sucker lmao i'm a virgin don't come at me besides this is a fanfic who gives af if it's realistic or not), dirty talk, fingering, breast play, pussy pronouns, oral (m. receiving) (need that geriartric cock inside my mouth), some fluff bc we gotta balance this thing or i'm going to hell (okay he's not mean i baited y'all. mean jackson joel miller piece is still in draft dungeon)
word count: 4,722 words
side note: hell-fucking-o????? 2K CITIZENSHIPS APPROVED!?! ,, ok gonna be honest when i started writing in here and my first fic (an old man logan one, do u guys see a pattern?) flopped, i never thought i'd make it this far and it's all thanks to you my lovely citizens :,) you may think this is silly but your support means a lot to me (especially comments n' rb I'M A WHORE FOR THEM). now, yapping aside, as promised, this won the poll for the celebratory piece, so here you go !!! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
Joel Miller is a man hard to surprise.
Years of weariness, trust and spirit broken by things that would kill anyone else, and overall, just surviving, you'd think that a man that was hardened by a rough past and of his age had seen it all.
Joel liked to think he was prepared for whatever life threw at him. Enter Ellie: how she had managed to break his shell, from cargo to soothing balm to heal old open wounds he refused to even speak of. But he was ready to burn the world for her, picking guns and taking lives to bring her to a home. His home. He settled, filial terms silent but felt, ready to take the second chance life had given him. Until the bond that united them turned fragile, loose ends tensing the silver string of found family.
He fell down the path of a familiar ache he hadn't felt in a long time, dormant, waiting for him to fuck up to show again with it's dull and hollow torment. He always did. So now he's spending too much time at the Tipsy Bison nursing a glass that could have his name by now, all to avoid going to a eerily quiet home where the room at the end of the hallway lies empty.
And then life decides to startle his track, albeit destructive, with a third chance: you.
Just thinking about you brings a certain tingle that an old rugged man like him should be embarrased about. One he shouldn't even feel.
But Joel loves you, he thinks. From the moment you showed up on his front door, rambling about some reparations at the school, were you volunteered.
"They were all scared of you" your sweet voice had said, some of that unreasonable fear laced within it, "so I came"
He scoffed at Jackson's ridiculous antics. Rumors spread fast in the small town, and suddenly, the hanging threat of who he was followed him everywhere like a shadow, which, given the dark nature of his now put to rest violence, seemed a proper description.
"They sent 'cha?"
You were clearly intimidated, given your shaky frame despite spring and the light tremble in your tone. But you were still here, gaze set on him as a determined child who wants to win the best prize.
"No. I chose to come"
His stomach does a flip at the stillness of your words, security etched in the statement as if you hadn't been in the verge of stuttering seconds ago.
Like you wanted to show him this is what it is, and whatever that was, you weren't running. But he testes the water, skin prickling intensely.
"And you ain't scared, kid?"
He laughed, the type of laugh that shakes your body with unease, but the one that shot across you didn't come from a place of distress, rather a more hidden one, between a pulsing press between your ribs, like it'd swallow you whole if you kept thinking about it too much.
"I am" you answered truthfully.
Something about your quiet admission made him falter the tiniest bit. Maybe it was how you had no problem voicing out loud any of your thoughts, or how you weren't afraid to be seen for what you were, the quiet of your answer out of a gentle place and not dread.
"Then why are ya' still here?"
Brows furrowed, like he, for some reason, expected you to yell at him for all the sins that colored his calloused hands red. Instead, you had looked at him as if he had all the answers in the world, big sparkling eyes staring deep into his tainted soul.
"Because I need you"
Yet, when you said it, Joel felt you weren't talking about the creaky drawers and old stairs anymore, but of the anchor you just found for yourself in the shape of Jackson's most respected and troubled resident, unknowing that, in that moment, he had chosen you too.
So, Joel may have forgotten about what feelings that feel too before world-ly feel like, but the quiet steady beat of his heart, mingling into a peaceful symphony with each soft breath past your rosy lips, head laying over his rising and falling chest, warm, feels exactly like love is.
He knew from the very first time you were his. Yeah, he loves you.
Joel just wants to give you the world, his world: the quiet afternoons, his rough limbs and aching joints, his face covered by spots and sun kisses that compliment his wrinkles, hair that gets curlier and softer and greyer, every figure he makes in his little shop and, of course, his bed.
Your Joel isn't exactly a pleaser, used of doing what he deems best without asking, yet, the moment you uttered those three words, he knew it was because he hadn't met you.
"Be my first"
He remembers the surprise on his face, how it grew red as the silence stretched on. The door bursting open, bed creaking under combined weight and your giggles. He too remembers the sweet cries past your lips, your taut muscles, the little strained breath you let out when he slipped inside of you. It all belonged to him because you let him, and that day, Joel Miller became the luckiest man in the world.
And yet, he still hadn't been as surprised as he was today.
The routine was the same from the past year: pick you up from the school after he was done at the office, taking some minutes to watch you with the toddlers, making voices as the same tender hands you used to jerk him off booped noses and carried children who made him think of getting one of your own, one with your grace and beauty, getting him painfully hard at images of filling you silly and your body changing to carry his seed. Fuck. He was a psychopath for such lewd thoughts on a place destined for education and infancy innocence, and here he was, cock uncomfortable inside his pants.
But then your mouth gets too greedy when your sickenly honeyed voice whispers his name, robbing him of air and only pulling away when his lips get swollen and his face a little flustered.
"Need help down there?"
There's always that problem and you're always the solution.
"Let's go home, sugar. Then ya' can help 'tis ol' man fix it"
Walking back home is always a hassle, hands intertwined, Jackson seeing a cute couple. But you're both aware of the throb that settles in between you like the tension, nobody noticing how hard you're trying to not just fuck on the middle of the street like two eager bunnies.
It's his fault, he thinks as you push the door of his house open, for making you like this.
The truth is, after taking your virginity, Joel's taught you things your unexperienced mind couldn't even imagine, and this past six months, you've complied with that sweet disposition that clung to you like the floral of the soap you used. And Joel loved that: how, despite having his dick stretching your tight pussy, you looked at him with those big eyes from the very first night, still round and innocent, like a doe and not a siren.
Which was surprising, because Joel, in a way, had corrupted you. Tainted the naive angel. And still, it was like he couldn't get rid of quiet shy you. Worst of it all was, instead of filling him with shame from robbing pieces and pieces of your integrity everyday, the older man felt some wicked sense of satisfaction and pride, to see how, despite his age and your soft nature, he was yours as you were his, and that he had taught you exactly how to enjoy that.
He knows you like the palm of his hand and the littered scars across his chest. The pattern you call stars, holding into a beauty only you see in the ugly marks, yet make him feel with each delicate trace, making such blunt and rough marks a galaxy; exorbitant. The same ones he thinks hide behind your adoring warm eyes. Joel just knows you, so even when things go the same way they have for a while, he's aware something is different when your fingers fiddle with his belt, trembling hands now struggling to free his aching cock.
He knows better than to think it's your arousal and impatience. No, this is something else.
"Sweetheart..." he warns. "Somethin' wrong?"
You shake your head, hands ready to take his underwear down.
"I'm fine"
He won't take that clipped sentence for an answer. Instead, his hands slowly remove yours from his hips before going to grab you by your chin, fingers pressing not enough to bruise but to make a point. His thumb presses lightly over your mouth, your bottom lip tugged down, parting your lips. You let out a little sigh, closing your eyes, eyelashes kissing your cheekbones. What a damn sight, he thinks.
"Talk to me"
"I want to suck your cock"
He almost chokes on nothing. Joel coughs a little, red painting his cheeks as a surge of lust and desire crashes through him. His eyes go wide at your bold and eager request, because one: it wasn't like you to talk like this, and two, you had never done it before.
Sure, you had jerked him off so many times he's lost count, but your lips wrapped around his length, mouth swallowing his aching cock? Just the image of it going past your pretty lips, the sensation of your spit mixed with his liquids... He already has a special place in hell, the blood rushing to his already hard member.
"Fuck, sugar. You wanna have this dick 'nside y'r mouth so bad? That eager and needy y'are?" he asked, voice reduced to a low rumble.
You nod, a little too excited as he sits in the edge of your shared bed, letting out a huff of effort. Old man sounds, you would tease. But not today, it seems, when your eyes are too busy looking at the pulsating silhouette under the grey cloth. He smirks, removing the layer, and he swears you begin to salivate like a starving dog.
"Y' think y' can take it?" his hand wrapped around his sensitive cock, giving it a few slow pumps as he watches you with a drowsy gaze. "Ain't it too much for a pretty lil' thing like y'rself?"
Wordlessly, you fall to your knees, looking up to him with those eyes of yours that drove him crazy. You caress his thigh, and despite being the one in control, Joel's eyelids feel heavy, fluttering at your soft and tender touches on his thick muscle, every hair rising at the reverence of your every move. You leave a little kiss in his inner thigh, making his heart skip a beat, breath a little ragged.
"I can" sounding so sure. Oh, his little angel.
"You gon' be a good girl then?" he whispers, voice hoarse and thick, looking down at you.
You nod, slowly.
"Let me taste it" you murmur, voice soft and breathy.
Your tongue darts out, licking a slow stripe up his shaft. You savor the salty taste of his arousal, moaning softly at the flavor. Joel's brown eyes darken in seconds.
"Quit 'da teasin'. 'M too damn old for that"
You smile a bit. "Impatient"
"Minx" he replies, voice thick.
It is indeed big, especially now that it was hard, and you do wonder for a second if you're biting more than you can chew.
"Y'asked for 'tis" like he can read your mind, "don't grow shy on me, doll"
He groans when your hand wraps around his length, stroking him slowly, teasingly as you always do. He feels the heat building in his gut as you work him over, letting out a little groan.
"F-feels so good, sugar" he voices out, strained. "But I need'a know if y'r made fo' 'tis. C'mon, princess. Show me what'a good lil' cock slut y'are"
You lean in, warm breath ghosting over the sensitive head of his big cock, making him shudder.
"Let's see what y'r pretty mouth can do" while tracing your lips, idly.
For the first time ever, the warmth of your mouth takes him. He can see it dissapear past your lips, stretching around his girth. Joel can only watch with a breath he forgets to take how every inch of his thick cock is gone past your lips. Entranced, like this was a magic trick of some sorts.
"S' that all?" he lets out a tense chuckle. You narrow your eyes, feeling a bit of a gag and spit drool past your lips. "Don't worry, princess. I can be of help on that"
He moves a bit, groin almost on your face as he's dangerously close to fucking your face. Instead, you feel how it reaches the back of your throat, making you pause at the feeling of your eyes watering slightly as you adjust to the intrusion.
"S'okay, sweet girl. I know ya' can take it deeper" he encourages, one hand coming up to tangle in your hair. "Relax, baby. You're doing so good-" his voice cuts off with a strained grunt. Then, he voices out in a more huskier tone. "Use y'r throat and take my cock like'a good girl"
You push forward, taking him deeper until Joel feels the head of his cock bump the back of your throat. He throws his head back, curls combed slicked now starting to dampen and fall disheveled, drops of sweat sliding down his forehead, muscles of his thighs taut with trepidation.
You gag slightly yet quickly recover as if to prove something.
"That's right. Why did we wait s' long to do 'tis? Fuck, baby, ya' were born for 'tis. Keep goin'. Y' mouth's drivin' me crazy"
Joel groans as you take him deep, nose pressing against his groin, his fingers tightening in your hair. Your throat constricts around him all while you fight your gag reflex. Then slowly, you pull back, lips sliding along his shaft until just the tip remained in your warm mouth.
"Don't be such'a tease" his voice reduced to a hoarse rasp. You just give him what appears to be a shrug and an apologetic smile, right before diving back in, taking him to the hilt once more. His hips rock involuntarily at the feel, your head bobbing. A guttural moan cuts through his throat, the only other sound in the room aside the wet sounds of your suckling. "S' real bad girl, hun. Wouldn't think a docile lil' doll like ya' would be s' mean"
But he watches you with such adoration in his eyes, completely captivated as you work him over, that you know his words carry no malice behind them. Without a word, he takes your hands, guiding them to pump what you couldn't fit in your mouth.
"Let's give 'em somethin' to do, don't 'cha think?"
Suddenly, the pressure ties his stomach in knots, his belly strained under his flannel shirt, slightly protruding in the middle, buttons as tense as his muscles. Joel feels his legs become shaky, chest heaving as he catches his breath. He looks down at you, taking in the sight of your sweet disposition. If he wasn't one lucky man.
"Y/n" he gasps your name in a choked breath, followed by a strangled grunt, his release building fast as he doesn't dare to . "I'm gonna..."
Joel tries to pull off, thinking having you wrapped around his shaft is enough sin for the day, but then your hands find their way to his legs, keeping him grounded. His eyes widen slightly at the insistent glaze in your determined eyes.
"God damn, doll. What're ya'-"
He doesn't get to finish, his words dissolving into a low, animalistic growl as his orgasm crashes over him. His cock jerks and pulses in your waiting mouth, spilling thick ropes of hot, salty cum down your eager throat, painting its back white.
"Baby, don't" Joel says through a worn down rasp, trying to pull out, but you, his sweet little girlfriend, grips his thighs with an unknown force, keeping him buried deep as you greedily work to milk every last bit of his cum.
"'S 'tis what ya' want, huh? You dirty dirty girl" his voice grows lower, a filthy snarl as his eyes darken a bit more. "Swallow it, then. Take all ma' fucken seed"
He holds your head in place, fingers tangled in your damp hair as he rides out the intense waves of his release. Joel's so inside of you, he can feel your throat working, gulping down every drop he had to give.
Finally, as the last spurts of his climax taper off, he releases you, his chest heaving with exertion. You pull back, a strand of saliva and cum connecting your bottom lip to the tip of his spent cock.
"Like that, dirty girl?" he grabs you by your chin, thumb wiping some of your saliva and his cum off. "Did ya' like the taste f' ma' cum?"
You lick your lips, savoring the taste of him. "I did"
"'S that right? What happened to my angel?"
You laugh, the sound tired and hoarse. "I'm still here"
He pats his thigh, so you sit in there, wrapping your arms around his neck. With a free hand, you remove some curls that have fallen over his worn face.
"Hard'a believe"
You click your tongue. "You were never a believer, Miller"
He lets out an exhausted chuckle. "I believe in you"
Joel revels in the delicate pink hues coating your cheeks. He's so weak for you.
"Now, doll. Be honest with y'r ol' man" he brushes a stray strand off your face, tucking it behind your ear with a delicacy so contrary to the roughness of his hands. "I know when ma' girl's goin' through somethin'"
You seem to grow shy all of the sudden. "You'd be right"
Needless to say, he's intrigued now.
"Care to tell?"
You hide your face on his shoulder, inhaling his sweat and natural odor, even the faint traces of soap. He combs through your hair, lazily.
"Promise you won't laugh" you say as you pull back, to face him.
He raises a hand, expression curious.
"I'd never make fun of 'cha, doll"
"I want you to cum inside me"
The room grows quiet for a minute, an by each second of silence that stretches so is the red across your face. Joel blinks slowly. Once and twice. By the third time, the crease between his brows has become prominent.
"What?"
Your face grows hot as you try to run away, but he stops you.
"Woah, hey. Where ya' goin'?"
"I told you you'd laugh" you pout your lips, flustered.
"I ain't even let out a goddam laugh" he defends himself. "'M just tryna process in here"
You huff. "What's so hard to understand?"
Joel looks at you like you've grown a second head. "Y' really gon' ask me that?"
"Maybe I want to try different things" you play with your fingers, avoiding his gaze.
He obligues you to look by taking you by your chin, gently. A small warm smile adorns his face.
"Different's good"
You reciprocate his smile. Maybe it's that or the fact he can still see his cum glistening your lips, or the thrill of his seed seeping out of your tight walls. Either way, Joel surrenders.
"Ya' know I'll give 'cha anythin' you want" he says, voice low. "Just say da' word"
You gulp. "Yes"
Joel lets out a low, animalistic growl at your breathy acceptance. It was all the permission he needed. He crashes his lips against yours in a hungry, desperate kiss, pouring every ounce of his pent-up desire as he grabs you by your hair, right at the nape of your neck, pulling you closer and tighter. His other hand roams your body greedily, slipping under your shirt to caress the smooth, warm skin beneath.
"We gotta take 'tis out"
He shoves the fabric up and off, breaking the kiss just long enough to pull it over your head and toss it aside.
"It's my shirt"
"It's a nuissance"
He pauses for a moment, drinking in the sight of your naked torso, the swell of your breasts rising and falling with each anticipating breath.
"Told ya'" he murmurs, voice rough with desire. "'S fuckin' perfect to be hidin' all that"
Joel leans down, capturing one rosy peak in his mouth. He swirls his tongue around the sensitive bud, suckling and teasing until it pebbles under his touch. You let out a breathy choked moan, loving the wet of his tongue against your warm skin. Then, his hot breath ghosts over as he utters a simple word that has your core clenching at nothing.
"Mine"
His hand slide down your stomach, slipping under the waistband of your jeans. Joel can feel the heat of you, the damp patch that had formed on the fabric of your panties. He groans against your breast, his fingers sliding lower, brushing against your clothed sex.
"Can tell she missed me. That ya' weren't lyin', baby. She's fucken wet" he rasps, his voice muffled against your skin.
Joel's fingers slip under the fabric of your panties, feeling the slick heat of your arousal coating his fingertips. He groans, his cock hard again, throbbing almost painfully against the confines of his jeans.
"Fuck, sugar" he mutte4red, his voice rough and low. "S' ready for me already"
He circles your clit with the pad of his thumb, feeling it swell under his touch.
"Ain't she know me s' goddam well..."
Then, he dips a finger inside your tight, clutching heat, groaning at the way your walls flutter around the intrusion.
"God, you feel s' good" Joel says, voice strained. "S' fucking tight and perfect. I can't wait to feel ya' wrapped 'round my cock, doll. Can't wait any damn longer fo' y'r sweet lil' cunt"
He pumps his finger in and out, thumb still circling your clit. He can feel you getting closer, your hips starting to buck against his hand.
"That's it, baby" he encourages, his voice a low, filthy rumble. "Fuck yourself on ma' fingers. Show me how much ya' want it"
He adds a second finger, then a third, making you yelp as he stretches you open.
"Relax, doll. We've done 'tis before. 'M just preparing her to take ma' dick. You gon' be a good girl and stop fucken squirmin'?"
You nod, pliant, your body starting to tense.
"'Tis ya' reward. Come on ma' fingers like a good girl, and then I'll give 'cha what ya' really want. I'm gon' fill 'tis greedy cunt with my cum an' pump 'cha s' full of it 'til 's drippin' outta ya'"
Joel curls his fingers inside you, rubbing that all too well spot that brings you to tears. He feels you clench down hard, crying out as you come undone. Your orgasm crashes over, body convulsing as your pussy clenches rhythmically around his fingers. When he pulls his fingers out, he's bringing them to his lips, sucking off your essence from the digits, groaning at the taste of you.
"'S sweet as always"
After that, Joel is quick to shed what's left of his clothing, nearly tearing the old flannel in his haste. He lays you down on the bed, covering your body with his own, his tummy pressing lightly over your abdomen, his weight sinking you down on the mattress.
He then looks down at you, taking in the sight of your flushed cheeks, glistening parted kiss-swollen lips, and heaving chest.
"I love ya', sweet girl" Joel blurts out, eyes are dark and intense.
He settles between your thighs, the thick head of his cock nudging against your slick entrance.
"Say y'are mine" voice a low, demanding growl. "Say ya' belong to me, y/n, baby. Say it"
He pushes forward slightly, just the tip of him slipping inside your tight heat. He groans at the feel of you, at how your walls stretch to accommodate him. You let out a small whimper, yet still unable to form coherent sentences.
"I want to hear you say it, angel" Joel presses nonetheless, his voice strained.
He rocks his hips slowly, pushing a little more of his thick length inside you with each thrust. He can feel you getting wetter, core glistening as if your body yielded to his.
"Please, y/n" he begs, voice rough and desperate. "Please, baby... say it. That 'am your first an' last. The only man who ever fucks 'tis sweet cunt"
"I'm yours, Joel" you choke out. "Only yours"
With a final, hard thrust, he buries himself to the hilt, his eyes nearly rolling back in his head at the feel of you, letting out a long low groan.
"Fuck, doll" he gasps, hips starting to move, pistoning in and out of you. "She's just made f'me, ain't she? Gon' make ya' feel good. Give ya' what y'asked for. Lemme take care of it. I like to take care of's mine"
He hooks your legs over his shoulders, nearly bending you in half as he pounds into you. The bed creaks under you, headboard slamming against the wall with each thrust.
"Take it, sugar. Just like ya' wanted. 'Tis dirty mouth n' greedy pussy" Joel growls. "Take ma' cock like a good little girl. Fuck, y' were made f'r 'tis. Made't be fucked hard and deep and full of my cum"
He feels the tight coil of heat in his gut winding tighter and tighter; knows he won't last long.
"Please, Joel" you mewl, desperately clinging to him.
Joel lets out a feral growl at your plea, hips snapping forward with renewed vigor. He can feel you clenching down around him, body trembling as another orgasm builds deep inside you.
"Ya' want my cum, baby?" he snarls. "Want me t' fill her 'til it's drippin' down y'r legs?"
You nod, too eager.
"Look at that" he chuckles, pounding harder into you, forgetting for a moment he's sixty one. "Such a slut, beggin' for me to flood 'tis sweet pussy with ma' load. 'M gon' give ya' s' much you'll be leakin' for days. Gon' fill her up nicely. I know you gon' make sure not'a single drop goes to waste"
Joel reaches down, his thumb finding your clit, rubbing the sensitive nub in tight circles.
"Come with me, doll" he demands, growling. "Come on my cock like a good girl n' milk every last drop 'f cum. Show me just how much ya' want it"
With a final, brutal thrust, Joel buries himself balls deep inside you. He throws his head back, a guttural roar tearing from his throat as his orgasm rips through him.
"Take it, baby. Let me make ya' mine" His cock jerks and pulses inside you, spurt after spurt of hot, thick cum painting your insides. "Atta girl"
He collapses against you, hips still rocking slightly as the aftershocks of his release roll through him. He can feel you coming around him, pussy clenching and milking his spent cock, trying to pull every last drop of his seed deep inside you, just like you asked for.
Joel's chest heaves as he struggles to catch his breath, heart pounding against yours as he cradles you close.
"Not so bad for an old man"
He snickers, rolling onto his side, pulling you with him until you're tucked against his chest, head pillowed on his arm.
"Brat"
He wraps his other arm around your waist, holding you close as he nuzzles into your hair, traces of lavender up his nose.
"But you love me"
Joel sighs softly, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead, then temple and finally shell of your ear. In that moment, he knows he'll never let you go.
"That I do"
You softly comb his hair, his eyelids fluttering.
"I love you too, Joel"
A beat of silence goes by.
"So..."
"So?"
Joel offers a tired smile, glint of mischief laced somewhere.
"Any other ideas ya' wanna say outloud?"
cr: divider @kodaswrld / gif @iamasaddie
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