#hellfiresky drabble

[hellfiresky]

That cursed Kaminoan sex ed

The downtime between missions was always a drag. Delta Squad spent their time lounging in their barracks, doing whatever they could to rest, and fill in the mind-numbing hours. Scorch, naturally, was never content to let a dull moment fester.

“Oi, vode,” Scorch, sprawled across his bunk wearing his ill-fitting red cadet fatigue as his top and full armour from his waist down, piped up. “You lads remember that kriffing awkward repro health module from Kamino? What class was that? Sentient Bio 101 or some dwang?”

“Sentient Reproduction and Biological Sustainability Efforts. Worst hour of my life. Long-necks droned through it as if it was some kind of sick droid sex.” Hunching over his datapad, and slicing through some random codes he picked up from their previous op, Fixer didn’t even look up.

“Ah, yeah, that’s the one!” Scorch’s grin was delightful. He yanked his own datapad from his pack, fingers excitedly tapping across the screen. “Guess what, vode? I still have it.”

“You kriffing didn’t,” Fixer finally looked up, his face was a perfect combo of disgust and resignation. “That thing’s foul. Why would you keep that?”

“Mmm why not?” Scorch hummed, scrolling his datapad to no end. “Oh, here we go! Jackpot!” The bleached blond haired RC stood up, and walked towards the broken holotable that was coated in dust in the middle of the room. “Ahem. As his anatomical conduit—”

“His dick,” Fixer cut in, deadpan, still typing binary codes at his datapad.

“—enters the designated receptive structure,” Scorch continued, voice shaking with barely contained laughter.

“Pussy,” Fixer chimed again.

“Scorch is,” Sev coughed from the corner. He pushed himself to focus on the array of weapons in front of him - clearly trying to stay out of this but failing miserably.

“—a critical phase of sentient synchronisation is initiated,” Scorch plowed on, finger jabbing the air.

“He’s pounding,” Fixer supplied with another non-lab grown definition of the act.

“Ugh, find a better word, you di’kut,” Sev lobbed a rolled-up towel at Fixer’s head. It missed and thwacked Scorch’s shin instead, but the demo expert didn’t flinch. “—This interaction, facilitated by coordinated muscular responses, creates a platform for genetic exchange within a controlled environment,” Scorch kept going.

“That’s literally just a corpo way of saying ‘he’s mounting it in,’” Fixer groaned, finally tossing his datapad aside to entertain his brother. “Who writes this stuff? Droids?”

“Really, vod? Mounting it in?” Sev snorted. “You’ve never gotten laid, have you? Kriffing mounting. What are you - describing two banthas fucking?”

Scorch, ignoring his brothers’ continued bickering, powered through to the end of the passage. “—The interaction typically resolves in a peak state of high-intensity release of all tensions!”

“They come,” Fixer said as a matter-of-factly.

“Yep. Both finally blow the hatch, game over,” Sev groaned.

The scattered laughter that followed was broken by the thud of a datapad hitting the floor. Boss, who’d been quietly suffering in his little corner by the window, finally snapped. “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ABOUT YOU LOT?!” he shouted. “I’m trying to finish our report - cause NONE of you did it, and you’re over there reading Kamino’s sex ed instead of helping me?!”

“Maybe you should get your anatomical condui—“

“SHUT UP 62!”

—

There you go @orangez3st!

[orangez3st]

Drabble Challenge May 2025 by @thedrabblecollective Day 21: Choices | Masterpost

swipe left, swipe right

✧ Star Wars | Rex, Fives, Hardcase, Jesse, Delta Squad | 20 BBY ✧

“What in Prime’s name are you doing with commandos—” Rex pauses, blinking. “Deltas.”

“Rex'ika,” Scorch beams, smacking his back so hard that it almost sends him flying across the room.

“Teaching Sev how to use Spinder,” Fives announces with a massive grin.

“Swipe left if you no likey, swipe right if you likey,” Hardcase explains to the sniper commando.

“Won't that offend someone?” Boss asks.

“Nope, that's how that works!... Sarge,” Jesse clears his throat, “It’s everybody's choice. No one'll be offended.”

Fixer watches on. Fives notices his silence. “You?”

“No need! He gets laid every week.”

“Shut up, Six-Two.”

A/N: Inspired by bits and pieces of @hellfiresky’s stuff 😭😭 their latest update on Seeing Red involves Triple Zero plot! Oh, truly the happiest day of my life. Spinder is space tinder or something.

Divider Credits: [1] by @/plum98 - [2] by @/enchanthings

[hellfiresky]

Where’s the Delta Squad? Good question. Read what went down behind the scene below!

This crack is based on a conversation I had with @orangez3st! Keep reading!

Boss: alright, picture time! Everybody move move MOVE! Goddammit these non-clones are moving like kriffing conduit worms. DIDN’T YOUR BUIR TEACH YOU HOW TO MARCH? MORNING ASSEMBLY? NO?! Karking hell. Of course you lot had normal childhood.

Sev: TALL PEOPLE AT THE BACK. MONSTERS, SPACE KAIJU, Everyone!!! No, not you Batcher. You’re not a monster. Your handler is.

Fixer: The fuck was that?

Sev: sniper business

Boss: first Atin, now Crossy?

Scorch: Mmmm. Everyone’s here, yeah? I feel like we’re missing something. Don’t you think?

Fixer: we’re missing four actually

Boss: yeah.

Sev: Fives, Hardcase, Fox, and Bly

Scorch: Riiiiiight. Totally, yes. Yep. Who else, huh?

Fixer: not us, we ain’t canon.

Boss: we were in that one episode though, remember?

Scorch: AHHH YES! Where Fixer stayed at the ship?

Fixer: yeah I was busy

Sev: busy watching Kaminoan sex ed

Fixer: you shut up *pokes Sev*

Sev: aye, I don’t judge

Boss: EVERYONE SHUSH! We need to take the photo!!!

————

Kit Fisto: are we good? Do you guys need any help? 😀

Sev: no, no, sir. We’re good.

Fixer: damn he looks good. How is he always so happy?

Scorch: probably because he doesn’t work with you

Fixer: I WILL WHOOP Y-

Boss: DELTA I’M TRYING TO GET SOME GOOD ANGLES. BE HELPFUL FOR ONCE!

Sev: *ten seconds sighs* fine. *grabs a lighting set*

Scorch: Oh I can do that! *takes the lighting set*. Sir, do you want a light boom? Or an explosive party?

Fixer: Nah, that’s my job *takes the lighting set and starts setting it up*

Scorch: Booooo! Okay. I know what i’m good at. EVERYONE MOVE CLOSER TO EACH OTHER. YES LIKE WE HAD SAID EARLIER, TALLER PEOPLE AND MONSTERS AT THE BACK. YES, ZEB, YOU CAN GRAB A CLONE. THAT ONE BITES, BE CAREFUL! NO, JAR JAR YOU CANNOT GET ON REX’S SHOULDERS HE’S SENSITIVE. GREGORRRR YESSSS REPPING US COMMANDOS!!! COMMANDER WOLFFE, YES I WILL SHUT UP. YES, SHINY WITH THE OLD ARMOUR YOU CAN STAND AT THE FRONT WITH THE CUTIES. CAPTAIN HOWZER, YOU LOOK DASHING, COME CLOSER A BIT.

Scorch (to Delta): Damn, Howzer really looks nice. How does he do it?

Boss: He moonlights as an underwear model

Scorch: we should go to GARber and get the Howzer cut tomorrow

Fixer: that won’t fit you, you bantha fodder

Scorch: LOOK BABY WOOKIEE!

————

Sev: *holds at least a dozen datapads* I’m afraid my hands are full, sir. Yes, Senator Amidala, you’re an exception, hand me the datapad.

Quinlan: One more one more! Come on, man. Just one more datapad. This is spiPhone 16, better than Boss’ camera.

Fixer: *coughs* fuckin spiPhone users

Boss: OKAY EVERYONE READY????

Wrecker: THREE TWO ONE SAY YEAAAHHH

Scorch: I thought I was the director

Sev: you got anything better to say?

————

Rex: *side eyes Jar Jar* COME ON GUYS BE QUICK

Kit Fisto: My teeth are drying here 😀

Fixer: lighting ready

Scorch: We’re not using Wrecker’s line

Boss: got anything better to say?

Scorch: SAY RED GREEN REEED AFTER ONE!!! GOT IT?

Scorch: THREE. TWO. ONE

Everyone: RED GREEN REED

Scorch: OKAY NOW EVERYONE SAY YEAAAAAH

Everyone: YEAAAAAAAH

————

Sev: HOLD THAT POSE. HOLD THAT POSE, PLEASE. YES, INCLUDING YOU, ZIRO. YOU’RE GOING BACK TO PRISON. I STILL HAVE FOUR MORE DATAPADS *takes more pictures using people’s datapads*

Quinlan: OH THAT’S MINE! MAKE IT GOOD I’M POSTING IT ON SPINSTAGRAM

Sev: Fucking guy *takes pictures anyway* AND DOOOONE.

————

Boss: Okay, what did Cody promise us again if we did this impossible group photo job?

Fixer: A confirmation that he and General Kenobi are official. Did you boys see them? They stood beside each other!

Boss: Seriously? That’s the only reward?

Sev: there’s a betting pool, we all voted yes, and now we have a hard evidence. We’ll bathe in credits

Scorch: Then we can go on a holiday! To Kashyyyk!!

Sev: Too soon, you di’kut!

[hellfiresky]

Gooooood morning, Coruscant! You’re tuned in to 512.7 Peak FM. Your trusted voice above the spires. Broadcasting live from Illodia Tower, this is your host Elvira Goor bringing you another bright and sunny Centaxday morning on the jewel of the Core Worlds!

Starting off with our much-needed traffic updates. Skyways 25 through 40 are seeing moderate congestion headed southbound. What’s new, huh? There’s a stalled speeder just before the CoCo Town exit on Skyway 36. Emergency services are already en route, expect a slight delay.

Our beloved hovertrains are running and on schedule across the board. Bank Station is already cramped with mid-morning rush at this hour, so if you’re headed to Column Commons - make your exit at Fabosi District, and get your 10k steps in! And if you’re headed to Senate Plaza, don’t forget - it’s rally season! Increased foot patrols and intermittent plaza closures are expected until midday.

Moving on to weather, it’s a gorgeous one today! The weather control have been tuned to a crisp 24 degrees with low humidity and a soft breeze programmed in for that open-balcony brunch. If you’re still deciding what to wear, ditch the dray wool and go for those lightweight linens.

Looking for dinner plans tonight? You’re in luck! Dominica, the Financial District’s newest five-star fusion restaurant, is still celebrating its soft opening. Indulge in a fine take on Nabooan cuisine, curated by head chef Nita Jankesga. Reservations are filling fast. Get your reservation now at Chop! - available at the NetStore.

Enjoy your day, and stay with us for another hour of news, music, and updates around the topside. Stay tuned on 512.7 Peak FM.

Photo courtesy of myself. (I’m bored at work).

[orangez3st]

Drabble Challenge May 2025 by @thedrabblecollective Day 5: Cold | Masterpost

poncho-holics non-anonymous

✧ Star Wars | Sev, Wrecker, Cal Kestis, Rex | ? BBY ✧

“Nice seeing you again, Wrecker.”

“Can't miss the weekly meeting, Rex.” The demo expert’s chuckle echoes around the cold, quaint strategy room with four chairs in the middle.

The door opens to reveal a guarded ex-clone commando.

Cal Kestis frowns. “And who are you supposed to be?”

Sev stares at him in disbelief. “M’one of the Delta Squad?”

“Hang on. The Delta Squad?”

Wrecker laughs. “Always gets that reaction every time.”

“No I mean, when did you even put on a poncho?” Cal asks.

“Uh,” Sev blinks, “Kashyyyk.”

“Oh yeah, been there,” Cal snorts, “The humidity. Osik planet.”

They high-five.

A/N: @alor-ika ner vod you said poncho and I said "ooohh it's on" 😂😂😂 enjoy the full crack of this meeting I wasn't even thinking about this 🤣 and @hellfiresky thought you should know this one

Credit: bottom divider by @/enchanthings

[orangez3st]

Drabble Challenge May 2025 by @thedrabblecollective Day 14: Abundance | Masterpost

where do i find hope?

✧ Star Wars | Rex (CT-7567) | 19 BBY ✧

Sometimes the silence is too loud.

Rex's only consolation in the midst of traitorous galactic pandemonium is doing anything else but staying still. Scrapper job in Bracca once enticed him, but he turned it down as fast as it appeared as an idea.

Landing his Y-wing in some junkyard in the middle of nowhere, watching every sunset only reminds him to count how many days have gone by since that day. His rations remain abundant—he can't stomach anything.

He doesn't want anything.

Rex blinks, jolted awake again. Still inside the ship where he's safe from the Empire's scrutiny.

For now.

A/N: Woe clinically depressed Rex be upon ye. Yeah uh I forgot to make him more L and talk to his ship but this is the angst you asked for 🧍🏽‍♀️ thanks for requesting, @hellfiresky! Deleted scene is he'd say things like "We're the only survivors out of that wreckage" while ignoring Ahsoka is still out there. Maybe it's better if he forgets. He could deny anything and everything if he's ever caught.

Credit: bottom divider by @/enchanthings

[orangez3st]

💛💛💛 LUPE I'M SO HAPPY YOU LIKED IT SO MUCHHH (and made you unwell about it that i am granted not one but two keyboard smashes it's the greatest honor)

I was hoping to fill more prompts but I ran out of ideas 🤔 soooooooo you got any? 😏

Also thanks for reading as well vode!! 💕 @pichiflu-draws @alor-ika @hellfiresky (yes this is also your chance if you wanna submit drabble ideas)

Drabble Challenge May 2025 by @thedrabblecollective Day 29: Maelstrom | Masterpost

workplace solace

✧ Star Wars | Fox/Riyo Chuchi | 19 BBY ✧

The door to Fox's office slides open. Fox looks up. “How was it?”

Riyo crosses the cramped office and takes liberty of his lap. She plops back against his armored form. “A maelstrom of a meeting. I barely registered anything.”

He rubs her arms. “You need rest.”

“I need caf.” Riyo shifts around to face him. “And you.”

She lifts his helmet slightly, just until showing enough skin so she’s able to press a kiss against his stubbled jaw.

Fox hums, his grip on her tightening. “Get back out there.”

Riyo's cheeks ache from smiling, her energy recharged. “Yes, sir.”

A/N: OOP I almost forgot to post today's drabble. Have a Foxiyo one, my first Foxiyo fic ever actually! She's got so many ship partners already and I love them all. Dear Foxiyo enjoyers this is for you ❤️🩵

Credit: bottom divider by @/enchanthings

[trixie2023]

Hilarious. 😂😂😂

That cursed Kaminoan sex ed

The downtime between missions was always a drag. Delta Squad spent their time lounging in their barracks, doing whatever they could to rest, and fill in the mind-numbing hours. Scorch, naturally, was never content to let a dull moment fester.

“Oi, vode,” Scorch, sprawled across his bunk wearing his ill-fitting red cadet fatigue as his top and full armour from his waist down, piped up. “You lads remember that kriffing awkward repro health module from Kamino? What class was that? Sentient Bio 101 or some dwang?”

“Sentient Reproduction and Biological Sustainability Efforts. Worst hour of my life. Long-necks droned through it as if it was some kind of sick droid sex.” Hunching over his datapad, and slicing through some random codes he picked up from their previous op, Fixer didn’t even look up.

“Ah, yeah, that’s the one!” Scorch’s grin was delightful. He yanked his own datapad from his pack, fingers excitedly tapping across the screen. “Guess what, vode? I still have it.”

“You kriffing didn’t,” Fixer finally looked up, his face was a perfect combo of disgust and resignation. “That thing’s foul. Why would you keep that?”

“Mmm why not?” Scorch hummed, scrolling his datapad to no end. “Oh, here we go! Jackpot!” The bleached blond haired RC stood up, and walked towards the broken holotable that was coated in dust in the middle of the room. “Ahem. As his anatomical conduit—”

“His dick,” Fixer cut in, deadpan, still typing binary codes at his datapad.

“—enters the designated receptive structure,” Scorch continued, voice shaking with barely contained laughter.

“Pussy,” Fixer chimed again.

“Scorch is,” Sev coughed from the corner. He pushed himself to focus on the array of weapons in front of him - clearly trying to stay out of this but failing miserably.

“—a critical phase of sentient synchronisation is initiated,” Scorch plowed on, finger jabbing the air.

“He’s pounding,” Fixer supplied with another non-lab grown definition of the act.

“Ugh, find a better word, you di’kut,” Sev lobbed a rolled-up towel at Fixer’s head. It missed and thwacked Scorch’s shin instead, but the demo expert didn’t flinch. “—This interaction, facilitated by coordinated muscular responses, creates a platform for genetic exchange within a controlled environment,” Scorch kept going.

“That’s literally just a corpo way of saying ‘he’s mounting it in,’” Fixer groaned, finally tossing his datapad aside to entertain his brother. “Who writes this stuff? Droids?”

“Really, vod? Mounting it in?” Sev snorted. “You’ve never gotten laid, have you? Kriffing mounting. What are you - describing two banthas fucking?”

Scorch, ignoring his brothers’ continued bickering, powered through to the end of the passage. “—The interaction typically resolves in a peak state of high-intensity release of all tensions!”

“They come,” Fixer said as a matter-of-factly.

“Yep. Both finally blow the hatch, game over,” Sev groaned.

The scattered laughter that followed was broken by the thud of a datapad hitting the floor. Boss, who’d been quietly suffering in his little corner by the window, finally snapped. “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ABOUT YOU LOT?!” he shouted. “I’m trying to finish our report - cause NONE of you did it, and you’re over there reading Kamino’s sex ed instead of helping me?!”

“Maybe you should get your anatomical condui—“

“SHUT UP 62!”

—

There you go @orangez3st!

[orangez3st]

THE AMOUNT OF VINE BOOM SFX PLAYING IN MY MIND WHILE READING THIS 😭😭😭😭

Another gold piece vod I believe this is what actually happened 😌👌🏼

CRYING NOISES

Where’s the Delta Squad? Good question. Read what went down behind the scene below!

This crack is based on a conversation I had with @orangez3st! Keep reading!

Boss: alright, picture time! Everybody move move MOVE! Goddammit these non-clones are moving like kriffing conduit worms. DIDN’T YOUR BUIR TEACH YOU HOW TO MARCH? MORNING ASSEMBLY? NO?! Karking hell. Of course you lot had normal childhood.

Sev: TALL PEOPLE AT THE BACK. MONSTERS, SPACE KAIJU, Everyone!!! No, not you Batcher. You’re not a monster. Your handler is.

Fixer: The fuck was that?

Sev: sniper business

Boss: first Atin, now Crossy?

Scorch: Mmmm. Everyone’s here, yeah? I feel like we’re missing something. Don’t you think?

Fixer: we’re missing four actually

Boss: yeah.

Sev: Fives, Hardcase, Fox, and Bly

Scorch: Riiiiiight. Totally, yes. Yep. Who else, huh?

Fixer: not us, we ain’t canon.

Boss: we were in that one episode though, remember?

Scorch: AHHH YES! Where Fixer stayed at the ship?

Fixer: yeah I was busy

Sev: busy watching Kaminoan sex ed

Fixer: you shut up *pokes Sev*

Sev: aye, I don’t judge

Boss: EVERYONE SHUSH! We need to take the photo!!!

————

Kit Fisto: are we good? Do you guys need any help? 😀

Sev: no, no, sir. We’re good.

Fixer: damn he looks good. How is he always so happy?

Scorch: probably because he doesn’t work with you

Fixer: I WILL WHOOP Y-

Boss: DELTA I’M TRYING TO GET SOME GOOD ANGLES. BE HELPFUL FOR ONCE!

Sev: *ten seconds sighs* fine. *grabs a lighting set*

Scorch: Oh I can do that! *takes the lighting set*. Sir, do you want a light boom? Or an explosive party?

Fixer: Nah, that’s my job *takes the lighting set and starts setting it up*

Scorch: Booooo! Okay. I know what i’m good at. EVERYONE MOVE CLOSER TO EACH OTHER. YES LIKE WE HAD SAID EARLIER, TALLER PEOPLE AND MONSTERS AT THE BACK. YES, ZEB, YOU CAN GRAB A CLONE. THAT ONE BITES, BE CAREFUL! NO, JAR JAR YOU CANNOT GET ON REX’S SHOULDERS HE’S SENSITIVE. GREGORRRR YESSSS REPPING US COMMANDOS!!! COMMANDER WOLFFE, YES I WILL SHUT UP. YES, SHINY WITH THE OLD ARMOUR YOU CAN STAND AT THE FRONT WITH THE CUTIES. CAPTAIN HOWZER, YOU LOOK DASHING, COME CLOSER A BIT.

Scorch (to Delta): Damn, Howzer really looks nice. How does he do it?

Boss: He moonlights as an underwear model

Scorch: we should go to GARber and get the Howzer cut tomorrow

Fixer: that won’t fit you, you bantha fodder

Scorch: LOOK BABY WOOKIEE!

————

Sev: *holds at least a dozen datapads* I’m afraid my hands are full, sir. Yes, Senator Amidala, you’re an exception, hand me the datapad.

Quinlan: One more one more! Come on, man. Just one more datapad. This is spiPhone 16, better than Boss’ camera.

Fixer: *coughs* fuckin spiPhone users

Boss: OKAY EVERYONE READY????

Wrecker: THREE TWO ONE SAY YEAAAHHH

Scorch: I thought I was the director

Sev: you got anything better to say?

————

Rex: *side eyes Jar Jar* COME ON GUYS BE QUICK

Kit Fisto: My teeth are drying here 😀

Fixer: lighting ready

Scorch: We’re not using Wrecker’s line

Boss: got anything better to say?

Scorch: SAY RED GREEN REEED AFTER ONE!!! GOT IT?

Scorch: THREE. TWO. ONE

Everyone: RED GREEN REED

Scorch: OKAY NOW EVERYONE SAY YEAAAAAH

Everyone: YEAAAAAAAH

————

Sev: HOLD THAT POSE. HOLD THAT POSE, PLEASE. YES, INCLUDING YOU, ZIRO. YOU’RE GOING BACK TO PRISON. I STILL HAVE FOUR MORE DATAPADS *takes more pictures using people’s datapads*

Quinlan: OH THAT’S MINE! MAKE IT GOOD I’M POSTING IT ON SPINSTAGRAM

Sev: Fucking guy *takes pictures anyway* AND DOOOONE.

————

Boss: Okay, what did Cody promise us again if we did this impossible group photo job?

Fixer: A confirmation that he and General Kenobi are official. Did you boys see them? They stood beside each other!

Boss: Seriously? That’s the only reward?

Sev: there’s a betting pool, we all voted yes, and now we have a hard evidence. We’ll bathe in credits

Scorch: Then we can go on a holiday! To Kashyyyk!!

Sev: Too soon, you di’kut!

[orangez3st]

HAHAHAH KRIFF ME YOU'RE ACTUALLY DOING IT 😭😭😭😭😭

“Really, vod? Mounting it in?” Sev snorted. “You’ve never gotten laid, have you? Kriffing mounting. What are you - describing two banthas fucking?”

SEV I LOVE YOU you crude 😭

I read Fixer's "his dick" in his voice idek that's even possible it does sound like he's criticizing Scorch's porn collection rn. Poor Boss he's got a lifetime ahead with these morons. Scorch's "mmm" YES I love it it's him it's him 😭😭

That cursed Kaminoan sex ed

The downtime between missions was always a drag. Delta Squad spent their time lounging in their barracks, doing whatever they could to rest, and fill in the mind-numbing hours. Scorch, naturally, was never content to let a dull moment fester.

“Oi, vode,” Scorch, sprawled across his bunk wearing his ill-fitting red cadet fatigue as his top and full armour from his waist down, piped up. “You lads remember that kriffing awkward repro health module from Kamino? What class was that? Sentient Bio 101 or some dwang?”

“Sentient Reproduction and Biological Sustainability Efforts. Worst hour of my life. Long-necks droned through it as if it was some kind of sick droid sex.” Hunching over his datapad, and slicing through some random codes he picked up from their previous op, Fixer didn’t even look up.

“Ah, yeah, that’s the one!” Scorch’s grin was delightful. He yanked his own datapad from his pack, fingers excitedly tapping across the screen. “Guess what, vode? I still have it.”

“You kriffing didn’t,” Fixer finally looked up, his face was a perfect combo of disgust and resignation. “That thing’s foul. Why would you keep that?”

“Mmm why not?” Scorch hummed, scrolling his datapad to no end. “Oh, here we go! Jackpot!” The bleached blond haired RC stood up, and walked towards the broken holotable that was coated in dust in the middle of the room. “Ahem. As his anatomical conduit—”

“His dick,” Fixer cut in, deadpan, still typing binary codes at his datapad.

“—enters the designated receptive structure,” Scorch continued, voice shaking with barely contained laughter.

“Pussy,” Fixer chimed again.

“Scorch is,” Sev coughed from the corner. He pushed himself to focus on the array of weapons in front of him - clearly trying to stay out of this but failing miserably.

“—a critical phase of sentient synchronisation is initiated,” Scorch plowed on, finger jabbing the air.

“He’s pounding,” Fixer supplied with another non-lab grown definition of the act.

“Ugh, find a better word, you di’kut,” Sev lobbed a rolled-up towel at Fixer’s head. It missed and thwacked Scorch’s shin instead, but the demo expert didn’t flinch. “—This interaction, facilitated by coordinated muscular responses, creates a platform for genetic exchange within a controlled environment,” Scorch kept going.

“That’s literally just a corpo way of saying ‘he’s mounting it in,’” Fixer groaned, finally tossing his datapad aside to entertain his brother. “Who writes this stuff? Droids?”

“Really, vod? Mounting it in?” Sev snorted. “You’ve never gotten laid, have you? Kriffing mounting. What are you - describing two banthas fucking?”

Scorch, ignoring his brothers’ continued bickering, powered through to the end of the passage. “—The interaction typically resolves in a peak state of high-intensity release of all tensions!”

“They come,” Fixer said as a matter-of-factly.

“Yep. Both finally blow the hatch, game over,” Sev groaned.

The scattered laughter that followed was broken by the thud of a datapad hitting the floor. Boss, who’d been quietly suffering in his little corner by the window, finally snapped. “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ABOUT YOU LOT?!” he shouted. “I’m trying to finish our report - cause NONE of you did it, and you’re over there reading Kamino’s sex ed instead of helping me?!”

“Maybe you should get your anatomical condui—“

“SHUT UP 62!”

—

There you go @orangez3st!