#honest to god i would have eaten it anyways the fridge is such a fucking war zone

[planet4546b]

objectively ‘leaving a ton of food in the fridge/freezer before leaving for 3 months’ is a completely uncalled for roommate move but she did say ‘well you guys can have whatever you want :)’ (OBVIOUSLY otherwise it will ROT) so i am enjoying a wide variety of snacks

[lucid-loves]

Taste Like Venom ~ Simon "Ghost" Riley Part 4

Pairing: Ghost x assassin!reader (fem!reader, no use of y/n, callsign “Hex”)

Word Count: 3.6k

CW: angst, violence, blood, strong language, scars, enemies to lovers trope, slow burn, fluff, clear attraction and sexual tension, smut later on, reader POV and ghost POV, minors dni, Soap lives in this AU

Let me know if I missed any CWs.

Story Synopsis: After Makarov gets away once again, Laswell decides to force a favor from you, the world’s greatest assassin and best-kept secret. You are now expected to help the 141 with taking down Makarov in addition to playing nice with them. It’s hard to play nice when you have always worked alone. It doesn’t help that one of the team members, Ghost, gets curious about you in each interaction. 

Chapter Synopsis: While you are alone in your own hotel room, the men talk about you over Italian cuisine. This includes speculation on Ghost’s feelings for you. Meanwhile, you are already gearing up for infiltration to tap the target building. Ghost decides that he wants a front-row seat to your show.

A/N: I am adding a taglist from now on for those who want to be a part of one. I made a post asking people to like it if they wanted to be part of it. If you would like to comment that you want to be in a taglist, you can do so on this post~

Taglist: @eatingtheworldsoffanfiction @dory-98 @cum-tea-and-towels @completelymarveltrash

Part 1 ~ Part 2 ~ Part 3 ~ Part 4 ~ Part 5 ~ Part 6 ~ Part 7 ~ Part 8 ~ Part 9 ~ Part 10

Good God, authentic pizza was absolutely amazing. The standard for pasta was incredible as well. It beat the standard cafeteria food back on base by a landslide. The 141 grimaced as they thought about someday having to return to the food back home. Even the food they’ve eaten out of your fridge has been refreshing to their taste buds. Soap was the most vocal about his dread of the mass-cook cafeteria food as he devoured another slice of heaven. “Christ, going back to bland spinach and soggy rice is going to be fuckin’ painful!”

“Remember when they tried to do a taco night. Fucking hell, the lettuce was dripping fat like a sponge.” Gaz added as he took a swig of whiskey. It wasn’t the Italian choice of liquor to pair with food, but it was the 141’s choice. Not Ghost’s though. He missed his Kentucky bourbon. 

“Last Thanksgiving was the most painful for me. Turkey was drier than my fuckin’ belt.” Soap chuckled, trying not to drip sauce onto the bed with how his whole body laughed with him. They were eating in one of the double queen hotel rooms, away from the public eye. When they were all together in a group, they often garnered attention. Such was the price for being such large, capable men.

“Anyone reckon that Hex is up yet? Food is gonna get cold.” Price inquired. They had saved some food for you. A plate full of different things since no one knew what you liked. Even Kate didn’t know when they called to ask her. Still, they tried their best anyway. And their best was getting cold on a ceramic plate.

Soap shook his head in refusal. “I’m not gonna knock on her door. The lass scares the shite out of me.”

Gaz laughed out loud. “Soap? Afraid? Never thought I’d live to see the day.” 

“Hey, you weren’t the one that nearly lost an ear! With fuckin’ car keys of all things.” He defended, taking a long swig of his own drink. He clearly wasn’t going to forgive you for that any time soon. It made him annoyed when he thought about the fact that you probably didn’t care. 

Price shrugged and poured himself another drink. “You were kinda asking for it, Johnny. I think I would’ve nearly killed you too if I’m being honest.”

“Well, Lt. made the joke first and he didn't nearly get stabbed.” He continued to argue, looking to Simon for an answer on how it was different when he cracked the joke. Ghost just stared with indifference, sitting in the corner with his mask halfway up. Even if he was with the people he trusted with his identity, he just felt more comfortable hiding his face while he ate.

The room went quiet for a moment as the men thought about it. Out of all of them, Ghost seemed to be the one that was able to get the closest to you. You still pushed him away by miles, but it was definitely closer than they were getting. Kyle took another slice of pizza, the fresh basil so vibrantly green that it looked like it was glowing. “How do you feel so comfortable pushing her boundaries, Lieutenant? One attempt at our lives is enough for us to back off. Yet, you seem to keep going back for more.”

The men waited for an answer, an idea crawling into each of their heads. Price had already picked up on it by now. He noticed as soon as Ghost lifted you in his arms. Gaz vocalizing his observation out loud just now triggered Soap to realize it too. A slow, knowing smirk crept along Soap’s lips. Simon scowled at the insinuation, reading all of their minds. “All of you can bury your ideas six feet under. I’m just trying to get her to trust us. The mission will go a lot smoother if she does. The sooner we do that, the sooner we can go home.”

All of them returned to enjoying their meals, unconvinced by Ghost’s protest. Was Simon attracted to you? Absolutely. Did he like you? Well, he certainly didn’t hate you. The biggest problem for him was that you were dangerous. Not just from an ability standpoint, but from an emotional standpoint. While he did want to get close to you, he still wanted to keep you just out of arm’s reach emotionally because he knew that you would burn him. Poison him with that venom of yours. He knew if he really did fall for you, he would never stop falling. 

For the sake of the mission and his own preservation, he convinced himself that you were only a temporary attraction. A beautiful woman with incredible power that will return to the unknown as soon as this is all over. His teammates knew better, though. In all their time of knowing Simon, he has never shown interest in women. Always too busy. Always too focused on work. Not even making time for hook-ups. When you came into the picture, you got his attention in a way they have never seen before. That meant a lot to them.

“Regardless, you have the honor of delivering our assassin her dinner, Lieutenant.” Price smirked, abusing his power as Captain to avoid feeding the feral woman next door. Ghost clenched his jaw, cursing out John in his mind as he got up.

The men continued their lighthearted conversation as Simon walked out, plate of food in hand. Taking a deep breath, he walked to your door and knocked. When there was no answer, he thought that perhaps you were still asleep. So, he took out his spare keycard to the room and welcomed himself in. 

The room was dim, large shadows casing over the beige walls. A few laptops were running on the desks, already hacked into the security cameras of the target building. You’ve actually been up for a while and have been busy getting things ready for your infiltration. It was alarming when you woke up in your hotel room instead of the car at first. However, it didn’t take you long to figure out that someone must’ve carried you. You were pretty sure who it was, but you didn’t dwell on it. There was work to be done and you had wasted too much time with sleep. 

Kate helped you get into their systems. From there, a layout of the building was mapped out along with the IDs of everyone working for Makarov. You have watched enough security footage to take note of the guard routes. All that needed to be done was planting the taps to allow you to listen in on everything. Nothing was going to be unheard. Not even the sound of a guard taking a bathroom break.

Simon watched you fasten a black belt tight around your hips that carried a collection of small throwing knives. You wore new pants, a long sleeve turtleneck with a hood, and boots. All tight. All black. His hands ached to reach out in order to trace your prominent curves. He wanted to feel the thin fabric of your shirt, the heat of your skin exuding through it. 

Instead of that, he placed the food down on top of your dresser, resisting the temptation. “Not going to eat first?”

You didn’t even glance his way, something he wanted to fix immediately. “No. It will weigh me down. I had room service bring up some fruit earlier. It will tie me over until I get back.”

“You’re leaving now?” He questioned, anger rising in his tone. You should have let them know that you were awake. That you were set up with the tech. That you wanted to proceed with the mission with a lookout. You shouldn’t have intended to do this alone.

But, you couldn’t help it. This is how you have always worked. Besides, to you, there was no reason to waste time with unnecessary things like knocking on their door to let them know you were ready. What were you? A fucking dog looking to be let out? “Now is better than later. Security usually lets their guard down after meals. It’s not too late in the night to expect intruders too. Now is the optimal time for me to place the taps.”

Simon scoffed at your unapologetic reasoning. “And you were just going to do this alone? Not even someone to watch the cameras out for you? What if you get compromised?”

Here we fucking go again. You grabbed the taps sitting on the desk, putting them in a small satchel securely tied to your belt. “Can you not criticize the way I do things every fucking conversation? I’m doing what I do best, Simon. I’ve never been compromised before. That’s a streak I intend to keep.”

He stepped towards you, his frame menacing as he towered over you. Hearing your name come from your lips was still something he wasn’t used to. Despite that, he wasn’t going to let you do this alone. This time, his tone was gentle yet resolute. “I’m letting the force know and I’m going to monitor the cameras.”

Looking up into his eyes, you could see that he wasn’t going to waver from his decision. There was no point fighting about this, you finally decided. Not even twelve hours ago was your last fight with him. A part of you was getting tired of it. Stepping back towards the hotel window to leave, you threw in the towel. It wasn’t going to stop you from getting the job done anyhow. “Do whatever you want. I don’t give a shit.”

“Hang on.” Ghost stopped you, his hand reaching out to grab your wrist. He pulled you towards him, using the advantage of his strength to have you close to him. Anticipating you to either reach for your knives or strike him with your other hand, he prepared to guard himself. However, you never used the same trick twice in a row. 

Like a forceful tango, you stepped your full weight forward to catch him off balance. You then pushed further as he was forced to step back lest you headbutt him, your hand now having the room to land on his chest with a quick, sharp force. In Simon’s fall, you swiped his sheathed knife from his own belt. Before he knew it, he was laying on his back on your bed, you straddling him, his eyes locking with yours that blazed with victory. 

Ghost’s strong hand was still wrapped around your wrist, but your free hand had his own knife pressed against his chest. Right over his heart that was thudding against his chest like it wanted to break out. The hot blood in his body was pumping into overdrive. Not in fear of death. No. In pure, passionate attraction. He swallowed hard, fighting back the urge to still pull you down and kiss you through his mask. Even if it would cause the knife to be plunged into his heart, the thought of being able to share a passionate kiss with you didn’t seem like a bad tradeoff.

Tendrils of your hair fell past your face, framing a beautiful jawline he wanted to trace with his lips. The image of you gasping in shock and pleasure as he squeezed your hips flashed in his mind for a second. It wouldn't have been hard to do. His other hand was still free but frozen as you pressed the tip of the blade into his chest. He also imagined the potential sweetness of your tongue, giving him a taste of dessert after dinner. He wanted to be the one to catch you by surprise and submit to his will. Only, you would love it and beg for more through feverish kisses and the grinding of your hips against his.

Christ, he was getting a boner. 

He wasn’t the only one who was feeling it, though. The sound of your own heartbeat was flooding your ears. You couldn’t seem to pull away from his blue eyes that so heatedly begged for you to come closer. The heat already felt from your body pressing against his didn’t feel like enough. Especially when you began to feel his growing hardness pressing against you. That just made your own sex tingle with need.

You got off of him quickly, putting distance between the two of you. What the fuck were you doing?! What the hell was wrong with you?! You haven't been with anyone for so long, but it was no excuse to get so swept up like this. Not with someone like Ghost. Not with someone like Simon Riley. You needed to get a fucking grip. Get your head on straight. Damn it, you were better than this!

Slowly, he sat up and cleared his throat, trying to pretend that what just happened wasn’t the sexiest thing he’s ever been through. His knife was tossed onto the bed next to him, your movements quick as you rushed to get the fuck out of there.

However, when Simon called your name, you froze. He sounded a little breathless, his voice making you shiver. “Hex, wait.”

Simon stood from the bed to grab something from the desk. Cautiously, he walked towards you, now learning his lesson that it wasn’t a great idea to just grab you so suddenly for multiple reasons. At a slow pace, he opened his large palm to show you a small earpiece. Still being careful with his speed and touch, he lightly brushed your hair behind your ear and inserted the earpiece for you. You flinched as his fingers brushed against your jaw, butterflies erupting within you.

“You’ll be able to hear me through this. I won’t say anything unless I really have to. You’ll be able to talk to me through it too. Whatever you want, whatever you need, just say it.” Ghost promised. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. You feared that using your voice would reveal just how flustered you were over what just transpired. Instead, you gave a simple nod and headed back to your window.

The nighttime breeze flooded in as soon as you opened the window, the chill seeping into your bones. Good. You needed to cool off. Without looking back, you slipped out into the night, leaving Simon behind to wonder if supposed enemies were supposed to be attracted to each other like this. 

~

The shadows concealed you, the moonlight accentuating them on every surface they could touch. Quietly and quickly, you moved from shadow to shadow until you stumbled upon the targeted building. From the outside, it looked like a rundown, abandoned office building up for sale. The place was hidden away, tucked behind the forefront of what Italy wanted to offer instead. Beauty. 

You watched armed men standing guard, looking out into the alleyways for enemies. Sticking to the shadows, you crept along the side of the building before spotting an open window just above you. Taking a deep breath to focus your mind, you sprung into action. With a few wall jumps, you were right in one of Makarov’s weapons depot. 

From the laptops back at the hotel, Ghost carefully watched the footage, almost holding his breath as he searched for you. His team gathered into the room once he told them you had left already. They had assumed that all the time he spent missing with you was just him helping set up the tech. He didn’t correct them on this. Like you had said before, never underestimate the power of assumptions.

Relief washed over his shoulders as soon as he saw your figure invade the building. Just as fast as you had entered, you hid, dropping a tap that was modeled to look like a dead fly onto the dirty tile. The place was dusty, the smell of stagnant air filling your lungs. The men here didn’t care about the cleanliness of the place. Fortunately for the 141, that meant that they wouldn't have to worry about anyone cleaning up the “dead flies.”

All of the men watched the footage as you swiftly made your way from room to room dropping flies. Soap double checked to make sure that the enemies’ own footage was still scrubbed as you worked. Regardless, you moved so carefully that any video of you just looked like a weird, black glitch. You were in your zone. This is what you did for years. This is what you have secretly missed doing.

Every move you made was calculated, following a strict regime based on the men’s own schedule. As you dropped more and more taps, Price began to check if they worked on his end. Sure enough, they could hear everything.

Gaz noticed that Ghost’s body was rigid, his eyes refusing to leave the screens. He was keeping track of you like he would lose sight of you if he blinked. Wanting to ease his worries, he began to prepare some tea using the hotel’s electric kettle. Kyle was always one to look out for his friends like this.

A hot cup of black tea was placed in front of Ghost, the smell already releasing the tension in his muscles. Gaz pat his stiff shoulder. “She’s gonna be alright, bruv.”

Ghost gave a silent nod, finally taking a moment to let his eyes wander off of the monitor to have a sip of tea. Now that he was more relaxed, he viewed your movements in a more admiring way. None of them could pull off how smoothly you moved. How easy you glided through like a gust of wind passing through. Even when you were close to an enemy, you kept your cool, refrained from killing, and moved on without detection. 

You were a god damn modern-day ninja. A fine one at that.

In less than an hour, you had swept through the whole building without detection. Every tap was planted. Not once did you hear Simon in your ear either. You were glad. You felt like if you heard his voice through the earpiece it would break your flow. But, a part of you did yearn to hear his deep voice so close to you. 

Getting out was the easiest part. Having no one seen you come in, you took the same route out. When you came back through the window, you were met with grateful smiles and words of praise that were foreign to your ears. Ghost wanted to be the first one to say something about your skills, but loud-mouth Sergeant Soap beat him to it. “Damn, Lass! I think you just set a record for 141!”

“That was quite impressive stuff there, Hex. It was like you were never there. Kate was right about you.” Price grinned as he thanked you in his own way.

Gaz hopped on the headphones to listen to the taps as soon as his Captain moved. “All of them are working just fine. I’ve only ever seen moves like that in movies and video games. Job well done!”

You were unsure of what to do with all of this attention, never having experienced it before. When you worked alone, there was no one to tell you that you did well when you got back. You didn’t know if all of this flattery made you feel good. In all honesty, the confusion you felt about it made you a little sick to your stomach.

Weaving past them all, you grabbed your cold plate of food that Simon brought to you earlier and left without a word through the door. After receiving some worried glances from his soldiers, Price provided some words of reassurance. “Don’t worry, men. Hex probably isn’t used to having people wait for her like this, let alone praise for good work. Give her time.”

As the team brought back some of the tech to monitor from their rooms, Ghost stepped out into the hallway to look for you. He initially thought that you would be in one of their rooms to use the microwave, but you were nowhere in sight. While he wanted to keep looking, a call by his Captain to help made him call it there for the night. 

And so he spent the rest of the night bunking with Soap, listening in on private conversations and thinking about you. Meanwhile, you spent your night eating a cold dinner alone on the hotel rooftop. Overlooking the city, your own mind occasionally wandered against your will towards Ghost and how it would feel if his heat saved you from the autumn winds chilling your skin.

[iceeckos12]

and he sees dawn before the rest of the world

or: a fucked up little au of 200. intended to be unsettling so just be warned warnings for: unreality (i think that’s the appropriate term? please lmk if not), implied self harm, fucked up relationship dynamics; lmk if i should tag anything else

Bzzzt! Bzzzt! Bzzzt!

“Ugh, five more minutes,” Martin hissed, throwing an arm across his face, as though he could stop the barrage of sound just by covering his eyes. His alarm was unsympathetic to his whinging, continuing to scream its daily mourning dirge, grieving the end of another period of blessed rest. “Fine, fine! I’m getting up, christ…”

He reached clumsily for the phone on his bedside table, only for his fingers to scrabble uselessly around the ghost of its presence. He was momentarily so stymied by the absence that it took him longer than it should’ve to remember that he’d moved it to his desk, to prevent him from giving into the temptation to hit the snooze button just one more time.

Letting out another slew of curses, Martin shuffled onto his other side and reached for

A jaw-cracking yawn near split Martin’s face in two as he hunched over the gleaming tea kettle, steam beginning to pour from the spout. He shuffled his feet, eyes meandering sightlessly over the cow-shaped mug drying on the counter, the cluster of crumbs that he must’ve missed when cleaning up after dinner last night.

He hated mornings. Maybe it was the preemptive dread he felt at the thought of going to work; maybe it was because he hated having to be upright this early in the morning. Either way, he felt strangely disconnected from his morning routine, each motion carried out with habitual, distant efficiency as his thoughts raced along like a hamster on a wheel just below the surface.

It...was a bit silly for him to be worried about work, though. The stuff he was doing was interesting, and he had the loveliest coworkers a guy could ask for. They’d even offered to teach him a thing or two about artifact restoration once they learned the truth about his CV.

He drew himself up to his full height and rolled his shoulders back, clouded sigh mingling with the fog from the boiling water. Things were going well. Hell, he was actually going to get top surgery sometime in the next year or so, which was amazing considering his teenage self would’ve laughed at the very idea of being out.

There was no reason to dread going to work.

Martin carefully poured the water into the mug, letting the tea steep before adding a splash of milk and sugar. When he picked the mug up, the heat from the tea had bled into the ceramic, so warm as to be uncomfortable against the delicate skin of his palms. He didn’t let go, just kept on gripping the mug, like trying to contain the last gasp of a dying star.

Martin stared around his kitchen. The waterstains on the inside of the cow mug slowly evaporating into the still air; the crumbs that had sat there for who knows how long. The empty, blank face of his fridge.

Martin lifted the mug, and steam collected on his glasses as his breath wafted over the surface of the tea. He drew away, waiting for the lenses to clear, before leaning in for another sip.

His reflection stared back at him, a monochrome facsimile of his face rimmed in white smoke, and he recoiled, the mug slipping from

Working nine to five, what a way to make a living…

Martin stared out the window, his hand pillowed in the palm of his hand as Dolly Parton crooned in his ears. Split second by split second, he let his eyes catch on a point in the darkened surroundings, only letting his vision blur into incoherence when that fixed point whipped out of sight. It was a game he sometimes played when he got bored of reading or playing cards on his phone.

The old woman across from him let out a quiet grunt and shuffled, drawing his attention back inside the train. She was a gnarled old thing, bowed by the gravity of grief and time and life, though Martin couldn’t say for certain whether it was one well-lived.

Barely getting by, it’s all taking and no giving...

That was the thing about people watching: Martin was never quite sure if it was disrespectful to make assumptions about a person’s life based on a passing glimpse. He could never be sure if the person with the grumpy expression had a foul attitude, or if they were just a kind person on the tail-end of a truly awful day.

The old woman was knitting though, and Martin generally found it safe to assume that knitters were nice people.

For a moment he thought about taking out his headphones and striking up a conversation; the pattern looked devilishly complicated, and as a beginning knitter, he always appreciated tips. There was an unfinished set of fingerless green gloves in the back of his closet; it was easy for hands to get cold in the Archives, and the color suited

“Alright, Martin?”

Martin startled, his pen clattering to the floor. He looked up to find Sasha perched on the edge of his desk, grinning like the cat who’d just eaten the canary. Or, he thought she was. His eyes kept skittering from one corner of her face to the other, like a smooth stone skipping across a lake.

“Uh…” Frowning slightly, he let his gaze travel over the shelves of books, the humming lights, his cluttered workstation. He removed his glasses so he could rub at his aching eyes, and let out a deep sigh. Probably just the stress. “Yeah—yeah! Sorry, I’ve been distracted all morning.”

Martin got the impression of Sasha’s grin being tempered with genuine concern. “I’m sorry to hear that. Is everything okay?”

“I think so. Just...work, and my mum…” he gave an expansive you know sort of gesture at life in general. “Thank god the weekend’s coming. Anyway, is there something I can help you with?”

“Well, I was going to ask if you wanted to come get drinks with Mel and Tim and I after work, but…” She cut him a meaningful glance, the bottomless holes where her eyes should be boring bright spotlights into the back of his skull. “We’d understand if you’re not feeling up to it.”

“Is Georgie coming?”

Sasha shrugged. “Probably. Mel didn’t say so, but they’ve been all over each other since they started dating.”

Martin laughed. “True.” Tried to gauge how he was feeling, whether or not he was up to a night of socializing. You should go, a strangely posh little voice murmured in the back of his head, and he found himself saying, “Actually yeah, I would like to come. I could use a night out.”

Sasha clapped him on the shoulder, and the impact rattled through him like a gong being struck. The echoes of it vibrated all the way down to his toes. “Excellent.”

Martin hesitated, and then, not entirely sure of what he was asking, “What about J

“Thanks for waiting with us,” Georgie said, smiling beatifically up at him. Passed out on her shoulder, Melanie let out a drunken snuffle and curled over, like she was thinking of climbing through the spaces of Georgie’s ribcage and sleeping in her chest cavity forever.

“Not a problem,” Martin replied, scratching the back of his neck.

To be honest, waiting with her was as much for his benefit as theirs. At first, he’d thought it was just stress; now, he was very sure that something was wrong. It wasn’t anything specific, or even bad; more like there was a sepia camera filter tinting the world dusty and nostalgic.

After his third drink, he’d looked into Tim’s laughing face and thought he might burst into tears. And he still didn’t know what Sasha was supposed to look like.

But he didn’t want to worry her, so he just bit his lip and rocked back and forth on his heels, even though the motion made his head spin that much worse.

(Maybe he needed to take a couple of days off. Have a lie-in. But that would—that would delay his work. The Institute’s work. Delays were bad; he felt strongly enough about that to carve it directly into his skin so that he’d never forget. He could roll down his sleeve and take a peek at it whenever his motivation slipped, like checking a watch for the time.)

For lack of anything else to say, he nodded toward Melanie. “She’s really out, huh?”

“She’s always been a lightweight.” Her tone was wry, but her eyes were soft and fond as she brushed Melanie’s bangs back from her face. “Never gets hungover though, the lucky bastard.”

“The nerve!” Martin said, affecting offense, which sent them right into another giggling fit.

Once he got his breath back, Martin mentioned offhand, “You know, considering how similar they are, I’m surprised that her and J̷̧̱̜͕͕̤͉̣̺̺̝͖̠̹̜͙̣͉̩̺̤̟͉͓̞̹̗́̆̂̋͆̊̎́͂̑͋̌͊͘̚͠ͅo̶̧̨͕̖͔̬̖̝̪͚̻̟̠̜̣̰̅n̶̥̉́̎͑̀͂͆̿̾͛̾̔̐͌́̅̂͂̒̆̐́͊̄̾̍̅̅͝

“Stop it!” Martin screamed, grabbing the mug from the counter and throwing it across the room. It shattered against the wall, scattering shards of ceramic across the floor. “I know

“What you’re doing,” Martin gripped the bathroom counter, ignoring the persistent ringing of his alarm, staring deeply into his reflection, “Stop it, stop it, nononon̴̡̡͚̮̠͙̻͔͎͈̜̓̈́̈́͜͜ͅǫ̸̯̠̱̖̲͙͍͎͒̇̑͒ṅ̶̨̩̳̩̝̹̳͎͈̬̦͆́̈́́͐̏̈́̕͝͝o̸̡̻̱̗̥̮̙̳̞͗̄͋̈́̀͝n̸̢̛̟͙̘̱̩͕̦̫̤̮͆͑̊͋́̂̽͜o̶̘̱̗̘̘͑̿͜ņ̶̥̞̠͕͓̠͔͚̮͈̬͕̀͗̄̓͑͑͛̕ͅő̸̮̫̓͌̾̌͋́̂̏̒̃̃̄̚n̵̗̫͕̺̻͔̭͖̉͒͗̀̈́̃̅o̴͓͉͉͗͋̎̕—”

“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m sorry, it’s okay—”

“No!” Martin shrieked, shoving Jon’s hands away, skittering backward across the broken and cracked stones of the Panopticon. Through the arched windows, the sky was a poisonous green and black, and multitudes of eyes orbited the room, watched his every movement with sickening fascination. “Just—stop.”

Luminous gaze weary and resigned, Jon did as he was bid, dropping back onto his heels.

Rubbing sweat and grime and tears from his face, breathing harshly through his mouth, Martin took a moment to remember where he was, why he was here. It always took a moment for everything to come back.

As though unable to keep silent any longer, Jon asked, “So what was it this time?”

“Don’t,” Martin hissed, dragging his hands through his greasy hair.

Though his expression went mulishly annoyed, Jon raised his hands placatingly, a silent, alright, you win. It was a familiar gesture, one that he’d done so many times while they were living in Scotland, while they were traveling the devastated landscape of the apocalypse. It made Martin ache for when things were simpler, when his heart didn’t just feel like one big bruise.

He gently set the thought aside, and turned a more assessing eye on the Panopticon. Normally the changes were insignificant, but something thick and red and black had started to coil around the windows, weaving in and out of the floor, cracking the stonework. Martin traced the strange things with his eyes, frowning—

“Christ, Jon,” he whispered in horrified realization. “Are...are those corpse roots?”

Jon bobbed his head. “They’ve long since overtaken the rest of London. It’s just us, now.”

Martin sucked in a long, frustrated breath through his teeth. There was no point trying to talk any sense into Jon, not after so long, and force would only result in immediately getting kicked back into that horrible dream world.

“And the others?”

Jon shrugged, tracing the cracks in the earth with his fingers. “Still alive, and living happily in the dream I made for them.” He didn’t say, unlike you, but the implication was so loud he might as well have screamed it.

“Shut up,” Martin muttered, pushing to his feet and limping to one of the windows.

Corpse roots, as far as the eye could see. They covered the city of London in a blanket of tangled black, so thick that it was impossible to see the buildings beneath.

“Was it worth it?” he asked, sagging against the side of the window, too tired to be angry.

When the silence persisted a second too long, Martin turned around to find Jon with his head tilted back, examining the corpse roots consuming what had once been the Beholding’s seat of power, expression distant and thoughtful. The eyes, ever-watching, never understanding, drifted closer, greedily drinking in the sight.

When Martin realized that Jon wasn’t planning on answering, he let out another sigh, ruffled his bangs away from his face, and said, “You’re never there.”

Jon’s gaze snapped to him with a laser-edged focus. “Sorry?”

“If you’re going to trap me in a dream,” Martin said, each syllable clipped and precise, “You could at least be there.”

Like it always did, Jon’s face crumpled, and he looked away. “...I don’t deserve it.”

“Oh, we’re well past that and you know it!” Martin shrieked, striking his fist against the stone. “You made your fucking decision to damn the world, to hell with whatever we thought, the least you could do is stop hiding behind your pointless guilt and act like this is what you actually want!”

It would’ve been better, if Jon had simply become drunk with power and was no longer listening to reason. The fact that he’d made this same decision every single day with clear, unclouded eyes and sound judgement—as Jon the human, rather than Jon the lynchpin of the apocalypse, pupil of the Eye—made Martin want to scream.

“I do want it!” Jon snapped back, then quieter, “I do.” He looked up at the corpse roots again, eyes going misty. “I just—I should witness every second of misery and pain that I’m causing. I don’t deserve to just...forget.”

Wind snapped and howled around them like a creature mad with rage, and Martin idly wondered what would happen to this world once Jon died. If it would all go back to the way it had been before, or if the shell of the apocalypse would remain until the end of time, a corpse husk of a reality warped beyond repair.

“You shouldn’t have to experience this alongside me though,” Jon continued, rallying. “So I would really appreciate it if you’d stop breaking your dreams.”

“Tough,” Martin snapped back, folding his arms obstinately over his chest.

“You could be happy!” Jon reiterated, stabbing his index finger into the palm of his hand. “You could just...live your life! Forget! There’s no point in being here.”

“It’s a deal, remember? Where you go, I go. Fuck you very much, but I don’t break my promises.”

Jon stared at him for one beat, then another—and then promptly burst out laughing, his whole body shaking with the force of it. Martin stared at him, utterly bewildered, as the laughing slowly began to dissolve into desperate, heaving sobs, as he began rocking back and forth, arms wrapped around himself in a mockery of comfort.

“I miss you,” Jon gasped out, half-crazed. “So much. I miss you every day even though you’re right in front of me. But I can’t go to you, because I don’t deserve to, not when I’m the one who trapped you here. I’m everything that’s wrong with the world. I always have been.”

“Jon,” Martin sighed, low and tired.

Jon buried his face into his knees. “No, you shouldn’t—you shouldn’t forgive me just because you pity me, that’s not what I—I don’t—”

“Who said anything about forgiveness?” Martin shook his head. “Fine. You’re an asshole, and I hate you. But it’s like I said.” He gestured toward the Panopticon, the roots, the poisonous sky. “When has deserving ever mattered?”

Jon lifted his face from his knees, though his gaze stayed rooted to the floor. “...I suppose.”

“Right,” Martin agreed. “I’ve accepted that you’re not going to change your mind, but...at the very least, I don’t want to die alone. So can you please just…”

There was a long, weighted pause.

They’d had arguments like this what felt like hundreds of times before. Martin begging for Jon to change his mind, Jon refusing with that same resigned, determined expression on his face, before sending Martin back into his dreams.

Maybe it was because Martin wasn’t asking him to change his mind this time. Maybe it was because they were so close to the end of all things, and soon they’d be the last two people on earth. Maybe it was because Jon was tired, had been for so, so long, and he had won anyway, so there was no point in fighting any longer.

“Alright,” Jon whispered.

…

…

...

Bzzzt! Bzzzt! Bzzzt!

“Ugh, five more minutes,” Martin hissed, throwing an arm across his face.

Somewhere in the far distance, the toilet flushed. A moment later, a pair of feet padded lightly into the room, hesitated at the edge of the bed, and then made their way over to the desk. The alarm abruptly went silent.

Martin uncovered his eyes and grinned up at Jon as he tentatively slid back between the covers, every movement careful and deliberate, like he was reading stage directions from a script.

“Look at Mr. Workaholic, having a lie-in,” Martin teased, pulling Jon into his arms and inhaling the scent of his coconut shampoo. “Must be the end of the world, or something.”

Jon stiffened for just a moment, before turning around and burying his face into Martin’s chest. “Or something.”

[hermannsthumb]

hey I’m not sure if you’re taking prompt requests but I just had this idea if you ever want to write it. I know it’s not anywhere near New Years right now but I had an idea for if there was a little NYE party with all the ppdc staff there. All the homies are just vibing, getting crunk on shitty alchohol or whatever and y’know Newt and Hermann have a lil New Year’s Eve kiss 🥺

That’s all I have to say I hope you’re having a good day!

@owengrose said: Prompt: "My New Year's resolution is to finally tell him I love him."

happy new year’s eve to both of you!!! i let the first one sit in my ask box for a while before getting to it lol. my annual Newmann NYE fic. here’s to hoping next year is moderately better (and I actually get more writing done...)

-------

“Here we are, then,” Hermann says.

He hands Newt a glass of something he concocted at the lab kitchenette—judging by the color, and the pitiful wedge of a clementine garnish he squeezed onto the brim, some sort of gin and tonic, though less tonic and more watermelon La Croix. It was the only thing they could find in the breakroom fridge that would work remotely as a mixer. It’s probably been buried in there for months. “Thanks, dude,” Newt says. Then, noticing the lack of a similar glass in Hermann’s hand, asks “Not drinking?”

“None of that,” Hermann says. “I’ve got a bottle of decent wine buried somewhere under all the rubbish in my desk. I’ll have that if I want any before we go.”

“Suit yourself,” Newt says. “It’ll be more fun if we show up tipsy, I’m telling you.”

New Year’s Eve used to be a lot more exciting when Newt was in school, and young and invincible and all that shit. There were parties—bar crawls—the Times Square ball drop at midnight, queued up on someone’s laptop or a television screen wherever he was—drinking until he needed a classmate (or later colleague) to walk him home. The Shatterdome staff still goes as hard as Newt used to, and God, Newt envies them for it, but the end of the world kinda killed it for him. He just kinda exists in a low, humming state of anxiety now. He and Hermann both. It’s good for them to get out of the lab every now and then and strive for normalcy, and Newt has a feeling Hermann knows it, which is probably why he didn’t put up a fight when Newt suggested they go to the big base party tonight.

Newt still needs a good few drinks in him before he can drink more and pretend to be merry. He finishes the gin and tonic with a wince. “Too much gin,” he says. “Okay, let’s go.”

Newt drinks, and he dances with a few people, and he engages in a few genuine non-work-related-conversations before he finally admits to himself he’d rather just chill with Hermann in one of the deserted corners of the room. Hermann is waiting for him in a stupid gold party hat with a cup of water—what a guy. Always there for Newt. The hat is a cute look on him, too. Newt wonders if he picked it out himself, or if it was forced on him; either scenario is cute.

“I just don’t fancy dealing with your hangover tomorrow,” Hermann says with a sniff, as Newt swallows the water down gratefully after a few thanks. “Last year—”

“Yeah, okay,” Newt says. Last year was bad. He ended up falling asleep on the floor of the lab, and when Hermann made him coffee the next morning, he puked it up all over a very important stack of Hermann’s paperwork and the subsequent shouting match just made his headache worse. Drinking water is good, very good. He kicks his feet up on a nearby vacant chair. The music is loud, and people look like they’re having fun. Normalcy. He and Hermann are just two normal dudes right now, who aren’t fighting monsters from another dimension. “Can you believe we’ve survived another year?”

“Frankly, no,” Hermann admits.

“One whole year,” Newt says. “One whole year of not being squashed by a kaiju, or eaten by a kaiju, or murdered by you…”

Hermann snorts derisively, though a bit of a genuine smile does peek through. “One whole year of you not blowing the laboratory up. That is a feat, isn’t it?”

“You fucking bet it is,” Newt says. He really thought Hermann was going to kill him over the puking incident, and only a day into the new year too. He slings an arm around Hermann’s shoulders. Two normal dudes, and friends at that. He really likes Hermann, y’know, but that might just be the gin and watermelon La Croix talking. “You got any resolutions, dude?”

“Er,” Hermann says.

“I want to try to get into yoga,” Newt says. “For exercise, and shit. We should do it together.” Back when the base enjoyed more funding and workers, Newt was always seeing flyers for weekly yoga classes taped up in the elevator and at the announcement board in the mess; once, he got it so into his mind that he was going to start going that he bought three whole pairs of yoga pants. He never got around to it, of course. The classes kinda fizzled out when the PPDC budget was slashed drastically anyway. Hopefully YouTube videos work just as well, and that the pants still fit him...

“If I’m being honest, Newton,” Hermann says, and Newt spies the tips of his ears turning pink, how cute, “I still haven’t quite managed to accomplish last year’s resolution. Or technically this year’s, I suppose. My—well—my nerves failed me every time I thought I was close.”

"Eh, no big deal,” Newt says. “I never did mine either. I think that’s just as much of a tradition.” He went vegan for all of two weeks before realizing most of the rationing-standard food they served in the mess wasn’t exactly catered to those particular dietary needs. Also, Newt likes fancy lattes too much, and oatmilk just wasn’t kicking it for him. “I totally am gonna do the yoga one though. I need a stress reliever. I don’t wanna go bald before we’re even killed by kaiju, you know?” He crosses his legs. “Or go grey. I can’t decide which is worse. What was yours?”

“Nothing important,” Hermann says quickly. He takes a clumsy sip of his own cup of water, and spills a bit of it down his sweater. Newt decides not to mention. “It must be nearly midnight. Don’t you want to run off to find someone to snog?”

“Nah, not this year, I don’t think,” Newt says. Last year (before the whole blacking out and ruining the paperwork thing), he made out with a ranger he had a crush on for, like, months, and the guy never even called him back. And Newt slipped his official PPDC email into his pocket too. So totally rude. He reaches out and plucks the elastic string holding Hermann’s hat on, and is delighted when Hermann scowls. “You’re stuck with me. Why don’t you find someone to kiss?”

Hermann opens his mouth, and then shuts it. The blush is spreading down from his ears. “I am staying right here, thank you, and I am not kissing anyone.”

“Suit yourself,” Newt says.

“Five minutes to go!” someone in the crowd shouts.

Newt locates a party hat of his own on a nearby table and pulls it on. It’s silver, unlike Hermann’s. He doesn’t think it looks nearly as cute as Hermann’s. “What was your resolution?” he finally asks. The burning curiosity’s too much for him. What did Hermann mean by nerves? Hermann’s never afraid to speak his mind around Newt, at least—Newt can’t remember the last time he’s held back anything. This must be a pretty big thing. 

“Oh, it hardly matters now,” Hermann says. “The year’s about to end, isn’t it? Better luck next go around, I suppose.”

“Were you going to request your own lab?” Newt says. That’s a big thing. And it’s a big thing he’d be hesitant to share with Newt, too. Not that Newt would be upset over having his own lab, obviously, sharing with Hermann totally sucks. It’s the worst.

“Mm. No,” Hermann says.

Newt feels a small twinge of relief, but only for a moment. “A different Shatterdome?” It’s the sort of thing Hermann’s always threatening—by Jove, Newton, if you don’t clean this mess up right now, I’m marching into the Marshal’s office, and I’m going to demand...

“Oh, it’s hardly that dramatic,” Hermann says. He plucks at the elastic of his hat this time. “It’s one minute until midnight.”

“Just tell me!” Newt says. Their fellow partygoers start counting down around them. “You’re killing me. I just wanna—”

“Ten—”

“It’s not important,” Hermann says.

“It is to me,” Newt says.

“It’s really not,” Hermann says.

“Tell me, tell me, tell me—”

“Fine,” Hermann says.

He grips the front of Newt’s shirt. Newt shuts up immediately. “I’m in love with you,” Hermann growls, “you wretched little man. That was my bloody resolution.”

“Oh, shit,” Newt squeaks.

Someone pops a bottle of champagne to loud cheers; confetti is suddenly raining down on Newt and Hermann. They totally missed midnight. “Oh, shit,” Newt repeats, and then, because Hermann looks utterly mortified and like he wants to book it out of there as fast as he can, thinks fuck it. He leans forward and kisses Hermann.

“Newton,” Hermann gasps, half in shock, half in delight, and returns it enthusiastically.

[probably-writing-x]

Admittance.

Guzmán x Reader

Set after the end of Season 3 (assuming Nadia and Guzmán were never a thing)

Request from anon: The reader is Andér’s sister and she found out she is pregnant with guzmán, but they are like not a couple.

My requests are always open❤️

- - - - - -

“Come on, school can hardly get any worse now!” Ander laughs as the two of you walk towards school.

“I wouldn’t speak too soon,” You roll your eyes, smiling as you see Omar walking toward the two of you.

He looked so oddly fitted to the new uniform as he hurries down towards you. He’d had to come in early today to get himself sorted for the introduction into the school. And it lit up your heart when you saw how excited Ander was to see him.

“I’ll meet you inside, okay?” You mention to your brother, walking off ahead as Omar comes running down toward his boyfriend.

It was a completely relief to see them back together now, so comfortable and relaxed back into what was meant to be all along. You couldn’t be as excited to be back as those two were. There were a thousand questions of your future running through your head and you were sure you’d pass out if you kept them to yourself for any longer.

When you get through into the school, you instantly focus on Guzmán only a few metres away. He’s the only person you could focus on at the minute. He’s stood laughing with Samuel about something or other as he clasps him on the shoulder and pulls him in like they’re brothers. It was good for them to have someone like that - both hardly having the best luck with siblings over the past year.

You hurry down the corridor towards him and bypass anyone who didn’t hold that exterior that he did.

“Guzmán,” You say, grabbing his arm to turn his attention toward you.

“Hey (Y/n),” He smiles, “Ready for school?”

“Guzmán I need to talk to you,” You persist, glancing over your shoulder as people begin flurrying in past you.

He must see the concern that the words inject onto your face as he holds your arm to pull you away from the crowds of people.

“You okay, (Y/n)?” It’s Rebeca that joins you and the boys, smiling to Samuel as she does.

Before you can say anything more, Ander and Omar are making their way towards you too, joining the group in a situation you should feel completely comfortable in.

“Nobody gonna tell me how hot I look?” Omar gasps, spinning round proudly in his uniform.

Everyone else laughs but you and Guzmán are evidently uncertain. He didn’t know what you were waiting to tell him. But one thing was for certain - given what happened over summer, he didn’t expect anything good to come from whatever conversation would be had.

- - - - - -

You’d been in first period for approximately twenty minutes before you started to feel it. It was that feeling you’d been suppressing as much as possible all morning but was impossible to avoid now.

Instantly, you find yourself hurrying out of class and straight down to the closest toilets. Hunching over the toilet bowl and trying your best to hold your hair back too.

You slump back against the wall of the toilet stall and sigh, resting your head back as one hand finds its way onto your stomach.

Shit.

When you collect yourself together and come out of the bathrooms, Ander is stood waiting for you on the opposite side.

“What happened?” He frowns, “Are you okay?”

His voice is panicked as he scans you fearfully.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. I must’ve just eaten something bad, maybe at dinner last night.”

Your brother’s frown doesn’t release, “I can take you home if you want to.”

“No, don’t be silly,” You shake your head, “It’s probably out of my system by now anyway but I might head home early.”

“Okay, just let me know.”

It kills you to lie to him. The two of you had gone through a lot together. But this summer had been a strange one for both of you. Whilst he was missing Omar and going through the last stages of his treatment, you’d not been as honest with him as you should’ve been.

- - - - - -

“(Y/n)!” Guzmán calls as he strides down the hallway toward you, “What’s going on? What did you need to talk to me about?”

You glance over your shoulder and already spot Samu and Rebe, followed by your Mum not far behind, “Not here,” You shake your head.

“Yeah, okay,” Guzmán nods, “My house is free, we can go to mine.”

He settles a large hand on your back and leads you through the school until the two of you start a silent walk back to his house. You weren’t about to confess this to him on a random sidewalk. In fact, you weren’t sure if there was any way you could confess this to him.

- - - - - -

“Can I get you a drink?” He asks calmly, opening the fridge, “I mean we don’t have much in...”

“I’m fine, honestly,” You encourage, “Thank you.”

“So, what did you need to tell me?” He turns around and leans back against the kitchen counter across from where you sat at one of the stools by the island.

“Okay, I don’t know how to tell you this and I’m sorry for not telling you sooner...” You can feel yourself starting to ramble so quickly hold it back to stop yourself, “But I’m pregnant, Guzmán.”

His face falls instantly, his folded arms slacking slightly, “You’re- you ar- you... pregnant?”

You don’t say anything, that already felt like it had drained you of all energy anyway.

“I- Is it mine?”

“I didn’t really spend my summer fucking multiple people Guzmán,” You snap, “Of course it’s yours.”

“But we... we were careful!” He points out, “The majority of the time.”

“Yeah, I guess that two, or three, times weren’t so lucky,” You sigh, “Look, I’m not expecting anything from you b-“

“Who else knows?”

You take a deep breath, “Me, and you. And the twelve tests I took to make sure.”

He can’t help but half laugh at that, “Have you been to the hospital? Told your Mum? Ander?”

“No, Guzmán,” you sigh, “I’ve spent the past two weeks trying to process it myself, and I didn’t want to do anything until I told you. So, no.”

He inhales deeply and runs a hand over his growing hair, “Shit.”

You fiddle with your hands in your lap and keep your eyes away from him, practically ashamed at your own admittance.

That’s how the two of you stay for a while. Both of you in silence, trying to process what this meant for practically everything in your lives. This summer had been an interesting one. It had started by you spending time with Guzmán whenever he was at the hospital for Ander, and then he’d walk you home when Ander had to stay at the hospital with you. Then it turned to him offering for you to stay at his when both of you would be home alone. Then a late night kiss that turned into more very quickly. And suddenly? The two of you were hooked on each other like you wondered how you ever went without. You both craved each other. It was only towards the end of summer that you both called things off completely - admitting that neither of you wanted things to go any further. Now? Any further had developed a completely different meaning.

“Shit,” You mutter to yourself as that growingly familiar feeling starts to flood your veins once again.

You find yourself hurrying to the nearest toilet instantly and repeat the events of earlier that morning. Only this time, you’re not alone in the school bathroom stalls. In moments, Guzmán is with you. His hand moves up to bunch your hair together behind your head, whilst the other rubs circles onto your back soothingly.

“You’re okay, you’re fine,” He repeats, though you’re not sure if he’s speaking more to you or to himself, “You good?”

You groan and sit back away from the bowl, flushing it away like it would get rid of any of the fear and terror that this whole process was causing for you.

You slumped back against the cupboard behind you and he sat opposite, drawing his knees close to his chest.

“I’m sorry to spring this on you,” You say quietly, “I know it’s probably not the kind of news that anybody wants to hear.”

“(Y/n), don’t say it like you should be feeling sorry for me,” He shakes his head, “You’re the one really going through it.”

You give him a sympathetic look to match, “I don’t think this is easy for either of us.”

The silence falls again and you fear that things will never be the same in your life, in that exact moment it all seems to hit you. You’d told Guzmán, Ander could easily freak out and hate you for getting with Guzmán in the first place, your Mum could hate how you’ve jeopardised your future, you-

“You know you won’t be alone, right?” Guzmán cuts through like a knife into your overpowering thoughts, “Whatever decision you make, whatever path you think is best for you, I’ll be there every step of the way. I know this isn’t what either of us expected but that doesn’t mean I’m going to ever let you go through it alone, I promise.”

It might be the overwhelming hormones but you find yourself bubbling with tears at those words, spilling before you have a chance to stop them.

“Oh god I didn’t want to make you cry!” He chuckles, shifting around to sit beside you.

Guzmán wraps an arm over your shoulder and pulls you close to him. And the two of you stay like that for as long as you need.

- - - - - -

It’s a few days later when you’ve finally booked to get a doctors appointment. And, just as he’d said, Guzmán is right by your side. He meets you at your house in the car, offers you a smile and had even brought a drink and snacks with him in case you felt like you needed it. He also managed to reel off what the entire process of this appointment would entail - having done his extensive research last night.

“Miss (Y/l/n)?” The nurse calls with an all too bright smile on her face and an unsettling welcome brightness in her eyes.

You take in a shaky breath and glance down at your stomach like you were trying to change the results of whatever they’d tell you.

“Hey, I told you, I’m right here,” Guzman’s hand locks with yours and he squeezes tightly, “Both of us together, okay?”

The two of you had never been more than that summer fling, you’d never even thought of him that way until the summer came, but he was showing himself in a different light now. And it settled you instantly.

The doctor is nice enough and goes through the procedures to tell you exactly what you’d expected. You were currently five weeks pregnant.

“Now, there are certain different options available to you (Y/n) and I encourage you to look into what works best for you,” The doctor explains as you lay atop the risen reclining chair with Guzmán seated beside you, “There are some leaflets I can provide you with, and I am more than happy to answer any questions that you have.”

You nod like you’re taking in all of the information he is saying, when you’re really hoping that Guzmán is instead. All of this felt too overwhelming to absorb.

“I encourage you to remember that this is your choice. You shouldn’t feel pressured into this decision and you should not base it on any other moral compass than your own,” He looks between the pair of you, “Your choice, completely.”

“If we chose to... when would we have a scan?” You ask cautiously, glancing down at your unmoving stomach.

The doctor smiles gently, “It would be scheduled for a few weeks time, that would be when the foetus would likely be visible and we could get a clearer understanding of what’s going on in there.”

Guzmán nods along and it looks as though he’s digesting it all. When you see him sat beside you, it’s like he has an odd maturity that you’ve never seen before. His shoulders carry him like he’s confident and collected, and he’s asked all of the right questions this whole time. What surprised you most was that his hand still hadn’t left yours.

“I’ll just leave you two for a moment,” The doctor states before exiting the room and closing the door behind.

Guzmán turns to you and furrows his brows just a little, “What’s going on inside that head of yours?”

You let out a shaky breath, “This is a lot Guzmán, and I don’t want to be making any decisions that you aren’t comfortable with or you don’t feel are right. This baby would be mine as much as it would be yours.”

“(Y/n),” Guzmán stops you, shifting closer in the chair than he had been before, “I know. And if you choose to have that baby, I’ll do my half. I’ll do it all, I’ll make it work, and I’ll be there every step of the way through the pregnancy and for every day after that. But I need you to remember that it’s your body, and you know how you feel.”

“You really think we could do it?” You let out a little laugh, “All from a summer fling?”

He chuckles gently but it curls his lips into the most delicate of smiles, “I think any man would be lucky to bring a baby into the world with you, (Y/n). And this might not have been the way you expected things to happen, or who you expected them to happen with - but I’ll be that man if you want me to be.”

With that, he presses a soft, gentle kiss to your hand that was intertwined with his. And some of that fear just about manages to dissipate. You feel like you’re finally letting that weight settle into his shoulders too and it’s not as scary as you’d imagined it to be. Sure, there was still a LOT more to come after this. You were yet to tell anybody else beyond this boy next to you. You’d have to go through the fearful process of pregnancy and child birth before you even managed to bring this child into the world. But somehow it seemed just a fraction more manageable as Guzmán was a man of his word. And the way his eyes smiled when the doctor confirmed your expectations had already told you enough. He would be that man. You didn’t have to be married, engaged, or a couple at all. You just had to have trust, trust that you’d both be there. And as he kisses your hand again, you become even more certain that he is.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #361

“the world is a vampire, sent to drain”

Have you ever been through a phase of thinking emo guys were hot? A phase? Hunny, they're still hot lmao. Have you ever dated someone that could play an instrument? Yeah. Juan could play guitar, and Girt played I think the tuba in band. What’s so horrible about wearing leggings like pants? I've actually never understood why people freak about this. Like so long as they're not sheer and fit you fine, why exactly is this a problem...? Weirdest picture you’ve ever taken of yourself? Oh dear. When someone claims to be suicidal, do you take them seriously? FUCK you if you don't. Honest to god, fuck you. This is NOT something you just don't even blink at. Even if it's surprising to hear from that person, you take that shit seriously and try to talk to them about it. Ever been kicked out of anywhere? Colleen's house. Ever had Skittles vodka? No, but that shit sounds good. Ever punched someone in the face? No. If you haven’t, do you want to now? Uh, I'll pass. Do you truly HATE anyone? No one I know personally, but people like rapists, pedophiles, etc., I sure as hell do hate them. Most historical/famous landmark/building you’ve been to in your country? No clue. Favorite flavor for most things? Strawberry, watermelon, or blue raspberry, depending on what the thing is. Ever taken pictures in a photobooth? Who with? Yeah: Summer, Jason, and I'm pretty sure Sara and I did? What is the closest book to you? It's a full collection of Poe's poetry that Mom got me. Are you reading it or someone else? I'm not right now. I may eventually. Milkshakes or Sundaes? Hm, I gotta go with milkshakes. Do you like watermelons more or cherries? I'm not a fan of either, but I'd definitely pick watermelons over cherries. Who was the last person you ate with? My family and I went to Ichiban (a Japanese steakhouse that we have here where they cook directly in front of you) yesterday to celebrate Nicole's graduation. Do you prefer broccoli or asparagus? Broccoli. I hate asparagus. Do you have any bug bites? No. Do you have any flowers in your room? No. Do you know anyone that owns horses? Loosely, anyway. It's a family I took pictures for, and I still have the mother on Facebook. When you were little, did you ever go to feed the ducks? Yes, I LOVED doing that. Don't feed ducks bread, by the way. Have you seen any of the seven wonders of the world in person? No. Have you ever won anything out of one of those crane machines? Yeah. Can you remember being taught how to ride a bike? Was it hard for you? Yeah. I don't THINK it was too hard. Did you get carded the last time you ordered an alcoholic drink? No. Do you know anyone who uses medical marijuana? No, it's not legal here. Do you know anyone who’s died in childbirth? No. Which was the worst phase in your life? 2016 was. Towards the end of '15 was the breakup, and through aaaaaaall of 2016, I was just dead inside and totally useless. Every day I wanted to be dead. Can you remember your last dream? I had a nightmare some stupid kids were fucking with my snake Venus, so I was trying to protect her. Do you ever use Snapchat? No, I don't have one. What’s your favorite musical? I don't like musicals. What happened at the last party you went to? Summer prepared some little Halloween treat bags for us guests, we watched a horror movie, and everyone but me smoked some weed. Are you more comfortable sitting or lying down? I would assume everyone is more comfortable lying down... Have you ever been a fan of N*Sync? Yeah, as a kiddo. Favorite kind of cake: Red velvet, yum yum. What is your middle name? Marie. TV shows and anime you watch regularly: None. Do you want to have a big family in the future? Just a big family of pets with a spouse. What was the last thing you did that gave you a rush? Oh boy, I couldn't tell ya. Is Vegas one of your must-see places? No. Pet rat: yay or nay? YAY!! I've had many, but I don't think I'll get any more. I've just had bad luck with them, save for one that died of cancer at an old age. Would you call yourself a writer? Written any stories lately? Yeah. I haven't really written any big RP posts of the late, but I did recently write a poem. Are needles something that you’re afraid of? Okay, so this is super weird. Tattoos and piercings? No problem. Little prick, getting blood drawn, that sorta little stuff, no problem. I am, however, NOT a fan of big needles, which used to not be an issue. It's actually kinda recent, and it's why I'm nervous about my second Covid shot coming up, aha... What was the last unexpected hug you gave/received? I really haven't had an unexpected hug since Jason asked for one before he left my house after our final talk. Who was the last person you held hands with? Either my niece or nephew. Have you ever been in a parade before? If so, was it on TV? No. Do you have a fear of rollercoasters? If so, were you ever forced to go on one? If you don’t, what is your favorite rollercoaster? I have a big fear of them, yeah. Post a picture of you from a recent time. Don't feel like it. Who was the last person to give you some of their food? Miss Tobey let me try one of her dumplings yesterday when we were at Ichiban for dinner. The last person you met, what was your first impression of them? I actually didn't quite like her. Have you ever been to a football game? Yeah, because my sister was a cheerleader. Do you like the snow or rain better? Snowwww. Have you ever faked sick? Yeah. What is your blood-type? A-. Have you ever eaten a bug? Not knowingly. The last time you were in the fridge, what were you looking for? Salsa. Mom got these veggie chips at the store and they apparently taste better with salsa, which it did. They weren't great, though. Are you listening to anything at the moment? It's Gab Smolders' turn for me to watch her Resident Evil 8 upload, haha. I'm literally watching three different people (Mark, John Wolfe, and her) play it. Can you take a bra off with one hand? I haven't tried, I think? I doubt I could, given that I'm not exactly small. Do you have an innie or an outie bellybutton? Innie. Can you crack your neck? NOOOOO AND DO NOT DO IT AROUND ME YOURSELF. Are you donating your organs? Yeah; what am I gonna use 'em for? It just seems like a waste otherwise. They're just gonna decay. When was the last time you talked to you mom? Before she left with Tobey to go to the store. Do you like pumpkin pie? NO. I don't like pie, and I hate pumpkin. Do you own your own computer? Yeah. Did you ever have to share a room with one of your siblings? Yeah; growing up, my little sister and I did. Is there any piece of technology you want to buy? I REALLY want a PS4. Did you ever have a night light when you were a kid? Yeah. What TV show had you hooked from the very first episode? Meerkat Manor, 100%. I had to know that Shakespeare was okay. What is your least favorite Sour Patch Kids color? Orange or red, can't pick. Have you ever seen the movie Matilda? YES! I love that movie. What is the weirdest chant you have ever heard? Uh, idk. How are you feeling? Annoyed and hurt as fuck because shit Miss Tobey says without thinking for a single goddamn second. I'm honestly beyond sick of this woman. Do you know anyone with a unibrow? I don't think so. Doughy or saucy pizza? Doughy. Do you have anything that’s limited edition? Yeah. Do you have an air freshener in your bathroom? If so, what scent? I... think we do? If so though, I just don't notice it. The bathroom doesn't smell like anything in particular. Do you like Jalapeno Cheetos? Oh man, I forgot about those! Love 'em. Are you a fan of salads? Yeah, they're fine. I have to be in the mood for one, though. What’s one random thing that you don’t like? Uhhh carrots. What’s one random thing that you like? Shrimp. Do you like chicken noodle soup? I don't. Is it easy for you to accept loss? NOPE. I'm the absolute worst with it. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? I really wanna see Sara, so take me to Illinois. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you? No, but a former best friend had her birthday the day before mine. Is there someone you just can’t imagine your life without? Not anymore, honestly. After Jason, I stopped that "I can't live without you" mindset. Truth is I'm going to lose people through life, and I'm not attaching my ability to happily exist to anyone. Are you wearing a ring? Two. Have your friends ever stopped by your house just to say hi? In the past, yeah. Do you like Chinese food? Not really. I only ever get pork fried rice and eggrolls from Chinese restaurants. Have you done any shopping for something in specific recently? No. Do you still live in your hometown? No. What was the reason behind the last time you stayed up all night? I don't recall, honestly. I haven't done that in a very long time. Have you ever had a UFO sighting or a sighting of strange lights in the sky? A very strange light, yes. Have you ever seen your mom or dad drunk? Yes to both. Seeing Mom drunk is very, very rare though. My dad was an alcoholic when I was growing up, so I saw him drunk plenty. Do your parents vote? Mom does, idk about Dad. Who’s the most romantic person you ever went out with? Jason. What restaurant has the best fries? Nowhere has anything on Bojangle's, y'all. Have you ever had a surprise party thrown for you? No.

[jasontoddiefor]

Idk if you write ocs, but if you do, can you write something about a male teen vigilante that was Jason's best friend? Something angsty but with a happy ending maybe, like Jason feels all alone after he came back and oc yells at him and makes him see he really cares about him?

Well, I wasn’t writing it before but now I sure am. Hope you enjoy this!

There was not a lot to be said about Arlo Temmings, exhausted high school student, but plenty about the upstart vigilante Stardust. Stardust was not affiliated with the batclan, not really, but Arlo supposed that had more to do with the fact that he really wasn’t the heroic, batarangs blazing, taking down mob bosses kind of vigilante. Arlo’s powers allowed him to heal others, given that he was physically well enough and had eaten enough. He’d always thought all those videos about metahumans and their heightened metabolism were jokes, but ever since he’d woken up with the ability to literally kiss away bruises, he’d been eating nonstop. Protein shakes were his new favorite breakfast, lunch and dinner because you could only eat so many pizzas before you started throwing them up on sight.

Arlo hadn’t even wanted to become a vigilante or do anything that had to do with healing. Honestly, he was planning to graduate high school with a just average enough GPA and then get some average job somewhere. He used to have bigger ambitions when he was twelve and had the coolest best friend possible.

Well, Jason Todd had been the tutor he’d gotten through their schools’ exchange programs, but he’d acted more like a friend. A very nerdy friend who was the living proof that some people got extremely lucky in life while others didn’t, but his friend nonetheless. Jason had planned to get a college degree at a fancy school, out of Gotham and told Arlo he should dream bigger as well, like graduating with honors big. Studying architecture.

Jason would be pretty disappointed to see how terrible Arlo’s grades had gotten, but Jason was dead and dead people couldn’t do shit.

So Arlo knew pretty much nothing about how human bodies worked except that the mitochondria were the powerhouse of the cell. Arlo had been flunking his biology exams ever since he had first been forced to learn about the fact that plants didn’t, in fact, just grow when Poison Ivy decided that now would be an awesome time to wreck an entire city block.

She’d also been the reason he got pushed into this whole hero business. Turned out that Arlo’s abilities were immensely useful when it came to disaster relief and so Stardust had been born. Crime Alley’s very own non-violent superhero, running around in a black hoodie, a Venetian mask covered with stars, and dark, paint-splattered jeans. Nobody had tried to hurt him yet when he walked out. Pushing the bats around who were all too willing to put you away for life was one thing, hurting the kid whose voice cracked when he was nervous, but could heal your broken bones while glowing like a supernova was something different. Arlo enjoyed his immunity, really. He only wanted to help others, make the world a slightly better place. He’d grown up staring at the pretty buildings at the other end of the city, wanting to live in one of them and built his dream around that. This situation wasn’t so different.

Tonight had been one of the bad nights though. Arlo had already gone through most of his snacks as people of all ages came to find him. Usually, he just walked through the streets, people spotted him and pulled him in new directions. It was reckless and stupid, but everybody knew Arlo was kind of untouchable because he cared for everyone and so everyone cared for Arlo.

And it wasn’t like anybody would be waiting for him at home. His father had died years ago and his mother was never there. The streets were kinder, more vibrant and alive, than Arlo’s actual home.

“Thank you,” the girl whose knee he’d fixed whispered.

“No problem,” Arlo repeated and yawned. He was tired and he had an early class tomorrow, or today if he wanted to be honest with himself. He should head back and try to catch at least three hours of sleep.

Arlo grabbed his bike and began heading home. As an unaffiliated vigilante, he didn’t have any fancy bat tech. Red Robin had offered to get him something, but Arlo wouldn’t know where to stick that anyway. Besides, the mob might start roughing him up if they knew he was on Batman’s payroll. So instead, Arlo had an actual normal bicycle. It had been a gift from Red Hood, who’d been a little appalled that Arlo just got everywhere by foot.

“That’s dangerous,” he’d said like he wasn’t waving around a gun at the same time.

Red Hood was a strange vigilante. He was no hero, he hurt and killed people, wrecked and ruined them and left behind a terrifying warzone. But he didn’t hurt kids.

That was one thing every child in Crime Alley knew. As long as you were young still, you didn’t have to fear the Red Hood. Adults were fair game, they were supposed to be better, but kids were just kids. Arlo himself had only just turned fifteen. He’d spent his birthday watching cartoons and doing an extra-long nightshift and then accepted a sleek black bicycle as his birthday present. He was reasonably sure the entire batclan knew who his civilian identity was, Red Hood did for sure or he wouldn’t have been able to deliver the bike to his house door. Arlo stopped his bike and parked it in the small garage all the families on the top floor had to share and made his way upstairs. He stretched and tiredly pulled his keys out of his pocket to open his door when he noticed that it wasn’t closed.

So his mom was back, likely drunk as well. Great.

Arlo pushed open the door and closed it behind himself. Without much care, he walked down the hallway, not bothering to turn on the lights. His mom would just complain about a headache or something. He entered the kitchen and opened up the fridge. Happily, he noticed that his takeout was still there. He took it out of the fridge and fished a fork out of the water basin and began munching on his noodles. He was so freaking hungry. Closing his eyes, he enjoyed his meal.

“Aahrlo?”

Arlo would later claim that he didn’t, in fact, scream, but that was exactly what he did when he heard somebody who was very much not his mother whisper his name. The food dropped on the floor and Arlo twisted around. Behind the table, in the very right corner of the kitchen, sat a dark figure. The must be tall and their hair was an inky black color.

“Red Hood?” Arlo asked and immediately rushed over to the other vigilante. “You- uh. Um, what are you doing here?”

He was pale and Arlo didn’t think it was just because of the moonlight illuminating his skin.

“Head wound,” Red Hood replied. “Didn’ know where else t’ go.”

Arlo kneeled down next to Red Hood and could only now spot the dark red that was quelling out between his hair. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, he was not going to bleed out in Arlo’s kitchen.

“Can you ‘elp?”

He was slurring his words, Arlo was pretty sure that was a bad sign. Due to the bad light, he couldn’t actually make out a lot of his features, and his mask still covered his eyes, but even so, Red Hood sounded so familiar and young. Arlo’s age kind of young. He’d never seen the other vigilante without his red helmet, but he’d assumed he was older. He was so brutal, so skilled.

Nothing like Stardust who barely knew how to throw a punch and was relying on other people’s goodwill.

“Hold still,” Arlo ordered and put his hands on Red Hood’s wound. The vigilante hissed, but Arlo didn’t even twitch anymore. He’d gotten so used to the feeling of blood sticking to his hands, it was almost welcome. He associated it with the rush he got when his powers activated.

“You glow,” Red Hood muttered, entirely out of it. He had lost a lot of blood, but head wounds generally bled a lot, didn’t they? “Like a fairy.”

Arlo giggled nervously and pushed his long dreads behind his back. “A girl I helped tonight told me I look like Rapunzel.”

“Nah,” Red Hood replied. “You’re not stuck in a tower all by yourself. You’re not-“ His breath hitched. “-not lonely at all.”

The wound was slowly closing, not as fast as it usually would, but Arlo was also dead tired.

“I don’t know,” Arlo confessed. “I feel pretty lonely all the time.”

Red Hood laughed, it was a dark and bitter sound, tethering on the edge of a sob or so it seemed to Arlo.

“But you’re good, always were. Helping people and all that. You’re not like me, you don’t fuck up. You stop listening and don’t give in to all that anger. You’re good and you don’t push people away and hurt them all over again.”

Arlo took his hands off Red Hood’s head and rested them on his thighs, blood smearing all over his jeans.

“You’re good too,” Arlo said. “You help people-“

“No,” Red Hood interrupted him harshly. “I just- I just get rid of problems. I shot a man point-blank. His brains just- it was everywhere and the kids were screaming and I just made everything worse but I was so fucking angry and didn’t even care-“

Arlo wasn’t good with words. He didn’t like reading, his dyslexia made it a god damn nightmare, and he couldn’t use all those fancy words he used to practice during tutoring because they felt so foreign on his tongue. Gestures, though, he knew. His parents used to be affectionate. His father was always holding him, had been holding him the day he died, protecting Arlo against debris. Slowly, to avoid startling him, Arlo put his arms around Red Hood. The other man tensed beneath Arlo’s touch, then slowly relaxed in his hold and even went as far as resting his head on Arlo’s shoulder, probably smearing blood all over it.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Arlo said, at loss for words.

“You shouldn’t be,” Red Hood replied. “You really, really shouldn’t.

“Well, I am,” Arlo insisted. “In fact, I’m so glad I’m going to cook you something because I need to eat and you need to eat and then I can heal any other injuries you have as well.”

Arlo kept on blabbering about whatever came to his mind until Red Hood was seated at his kitchen table and Arlo could hardly keep his eyes open anymore.

So, really, there wasn’t much to be said about Arlo Temmings, exhausted high school student and part time vigilante. His grades were held together by duct tape and safety pins and sometimes Red Hood nearly bled out in his kitchen while Arlo made an utter fool of himself and fell asleep on him.

[love-fireflysong]

Day 20: Dare

Fandom: Until Dawn Character(s): Beth Washington, Josh Washington, Hannah Washington Words: 1728 Rating: General (minor language, plans to poison your best friends and yourself!) Author’s Notes: Super late holy shit. But it’s fine. Have some cookies. Just don’t take any from Josh...

This fic is not sponsored by Dare Cookies. Honestly, that’s probably a good thing.

When Beth walked into the kitchen that morning, to say that she had not expected the sight before her would not be a lie. There were many things she anticipated seeing when walking into her kitchen, Josh covered head to toe in white powder was not one of them. Well, that was a lie actually. Truthfully, Josh was exactly the type of person she could see running a secret coke lab, just not from the family kitchen. At least, she really hoped not. Reporting her brother for running a cocaine lab in the middle of their kitchen was not what she intended to start her day with.

“Are you, are you covered in flour?”

While Josh didn’t move from where he was standing at the counter, he did look over his shoulder at her affronted. “Um excuse me. This is cornstarch, not flour. Learn the difference Beth, god.” He gave a disdainful sniff, and then proceeded to sneeze violently into his arm.

Beth rolled her eyes. “Sorry. Cornstarch. Why in the world are you covered in cornstarch then.”

“Making cookies.”

Beth just stopped to stare at her brother with narrowed eyes, mouth opening and closing as she tried to find some form of words, only to groan and rub at a spot between her eyes. Words were quite literally failing her right now, and she didn’t even know where to start.

“Hey Beth, what’s taking so long—why is Josh covered in flour?”

Beth turned to see Hannah behind her, who stopped to stare at Josh in turn. Before she could figure out how to even start answering her question, Josh had butted in with exasperation. “It’s cornstarch, people! God, does no one in this house know what basic fucking baking supplies look like?”

Beth ignored Josh, an easy feat when he’s been part of their everyday lives since before they could talk, and gave her twin a flat, unimpressed look. “He’s making cookies. Apparently.”

Hannah’s forehead creased in confusion. “But, cookies don’t need cornstarch...”

Beth nodded slowly in agreement, her next words coming out as a tired sigh. “They also don’t need soy sauce, mustard, and mayo, and yet, here we are.”

True to her words, surrounding Josh on all available surfaces were bags upon bags filled to the brim with numerous bottles of soy sauce, mayonnaise, and two(!) kinds of mustard. All of this was ignoring the dozen boxes of cookies scattered around the kitchen and the roughly four bags filled with cornstarch alone. There were questions out there that Beth never wanted the answers too, and this right here was roughly seven of them.

Unfortunately for her, Hannah didn’t share the same thoughts. “Do I want to know what kind of cookies you’re making?”

“No, no you don’t. I don’t want to know. Neither of us want to know. So let’s just grab our shit from the fridge and get back upstairs where it’s safe.”

Josh ignored Beth just as easily as she did him earlier, instead reaching over to grab one of the bottles of soy sauce and proceeded to dump almost the entirety of it into what she hoped was a bowl. A bowl of what, she didn’t want to know. “Special cookies, Han. For three very special people.”

“...if those cookies are for us, I will end you here and now Josh, don’t think I won’t.”

Josh snorted as he lifted his whisk to inspect the consistency of his soy sauce/cornstarch concoction. “Oh please Beth. We both know that you could probably snap me like I twig.” He grimaced for a second, seemingly unhappy with the thickness, and added some more cornstarch. He coughed at the rising cloud of white that erupted from the bowl. “Nah, these are for me, Chris, and Ash later.”

“Alright. Gonna be honest here. Was not expecting to have to call the police because there was a murder-suicide pact tonight.”

“Sad thing is, probably the least exciting call they’ll ever have coming from our house.” Hannah gave a long-suffering sigh as she reached for one of the empty boxes of cookies on the table nearby, this one Ultimate Maple Creme.  “Is there a reason you bought like, a million boxes of four different flavours of cookies?”

Josh shrugged nonchalantly at the question, and reinspected his brown sludge. Happy now with the results, Beth and Hannah watched him reach of a plate of what they recognized to be the cookie halves of the Ultimate Fudge Chocolate. “We’re playing truth or dare tonight.”

Hannah held up the empty box of Dare brand cookies higher. “I don’t think that when people play truth or dare, they mean the cookie brand.”

“Yeah, well, that’s because you don’t share my brilliance. See, this is how we can tell that I was the only one who got any imagination in this family.” Josh started to carefully take his thick sludge and began to ice the cookies with them.

Hannah was a little more hesitant with her next question. “What exactly are you doing to all these cookies anyways?” Once again, not a question Beth wanted the answer to.

This time, Josh did fully turn to face the two of them, and oh boy was he a sight. He was almost completely covered in cornstarch with random flecks of soy sauce and mustard covering his hands and the apron he had probably stolen from the home-ec room at school. In one arm was a bowl filled with what Beth assumed to be the unholy amalgamation of soy sauce and cornstarch and the other held the whisk, covered in said mixture. The large, maniacal grin on his face and insane look in his eyes was enough to complete the image that their brother had officially snapped. “Oh, am I glad you asked, Han! You see, this is where my brilliance comes into play! I am slowly and painstakingly replacing the creme in every single one of these cookies with my own!” He waved the whisk wildly and Beth backed up to hopefully avoid the spray of brown, but it was thick enough that nothing actually flew thankfully.

Beth hated herself for the words coming out of her mouth, but they were out into the world before she knew it. “And what kind of cream is that?”

Josh changed the tone of his voice so resembled that of a teacher giving a lecture. “It changes for every cookie of course, but they all start with the same cornstarch/water base as a thickener. From there, it all changes! For the maple, I add some dijon mustard for color. Chocolate gets soy sauce. Lemon, just a smidgen of regular mustard.” Josh turned back to the row of chocolate cookies on the counter. “And the coconut gets mayo, simply because an icing of just cornstarch is boring and I am not all about that life.”

“Kind of making it sound that your not all about life in general right now.”

Josh didn’t give much of an answer other than a shrug. “That’s because you don’t understand my genius.”

“Evil genius more like.”

“Is there any better?”

God help her, but Hannah moved closer to watch over Josh’s shoulder as he continued to ice the cookies. “And what are you doing with the normal fillings?”

Without looking, Josh pointed towards a couple of containers to the left of him. “Failures and fillings are over there if you want them.”

Beth was definitely more then a little hesitant when she looked in the bowl of ‘failures’. Only to sigh in relief at the sight of what was just a bowl of broken cookies that Josh hadn’t managed to separate properly. Which wasn’t a surprise. These weren’t exactly Oreo’s he was dealing with, so it was probably harder to split these without one or both sides of the cookie shattering. The other container was just filled with maple and chocolate creme centers as he promised. She reached into the first bowl and picked out a maple one that was missing about a third of the cookie on top, popping it into her mouth as she handed Hannah a similar chocolate one.

“Surprised that these are even here. Thought you would have eaten every single mistake.”

The look that Josh gave her was so unimpressed that she almost choked on the cookie in surprise. “Beth. I have been at this for literally hours. Trust me, I got sick of these things like two hours ago. There were so many mistakes.”

Hannah stuck her hand in a bowl to grab another broken chocolate fudge, but carefully added some of the discarded maple creme on top. “So how exactly is this game supposed to work? Whenever someone picks dare they have to eat a cookie?”

Josh shook his head in clear disappointment as he gestured at himself. “Oh Hannah. Hannah, Hannah, Hannah. Once again, only one who has any imagination, right here.” He returned back to his tray of cookies, carefully placing the other half back on top of the soy sauce creme, cleaning up any that leaked over the edge as he did so. “Of course not. It’s very simple really. Someone picks either truth or dare, and the person asking asks their question or gives their demand. The fun comes in refusing! If anyone refuses to either answer the truth or do the dare, then they have to eat a cookie as repentance.”

Beth watched Josh put the tray of now completed ‘chocolate fudge’ cookies into the fridge to harden as she ate a piece of maple creme from the bowl. She noticed that there was already a couple of other trays in the fridge and made a note to warn Sam not to touch a single cookie when she came over later in the afternoon. “And are Chris and Ashley aware that there are going to be cookies?”

“Nope.”

She sighed. “Are they even aware that they’re gonna be playing truth or dare tonight?”

“Nope.” 

The pop of the p was so self-satisfied that Beth turned to look at Hannah, but saw that she was already on her phone before she could open her mouth.

“Already putting Poison Control on speed dial.”

“Probably a good idea honestly.” Josh didn’t even pause from grabbing the four boxes of lemon creme’s, another four containers of cornstarch, and two bottles of regular mustard as he replied.

[thatfanficstuff]

The Light in my Darkness - 22

Pairing: Clint x Reader ???

Warning/Note: Still angsty and shit.

***

The thing about loving someone was the pain that so often came with it. You knew from the beginning that this agreement with Clint was a risky proposition. That there was the chance it would all go to hell and you’d be left picking up the pieces of your heart. What you didn’t realize was just how deep that pain would go. Your chest ached with the loss of him. This wasn’t heartbreak, this was pure devastation. He had become such a part of you that his absence was a physical thing you felt deep in your soul.

God, it hurt. You laid on the floor of your studio for hours and wept. The coolness of the wood beneath you seeped through your clothes and your skin grew tight with dried tears, but still you cried. Grieving for the loss of the man you loved and for the love you were so certain he’d felt for you even if only for a moment.

Eventually the tears stopped but you remained curled up on the floor not willing to move just yet. You ran your eyes around the room taking in the photos that lined the wall, the sketches you’d drawn, the paintings you’d created. You hadn’t been wrong. He loved you. The proof was all around you. And nowhere could it be seen more clearly than the photographs still in your computer. 

You sat up with a sniff and ran the sleeve of your shirt over your face to wipe away some of the tears. You reached up and pulled your laptop from the counter where you’d sat it when you’d first entered the studio. After firing it up, you went immediately to your photos to scroll through them again. The images that had brought you such joy earlier now only served to hurt you more. You took a deep, stuttering breath, trying to center yourself.

You opened one of the images in your graphics program and, after making a couple of tweaks, sent it as an attachment to Steve. The email you sent with it was lengthy and detailed and perhaps a little rambly but he responded almost immediately. He loved every rambling thought you’d typed out.

This was it. This is what you had been missing. That central theme Steve wanted your show to have. Love. Loss. Him.

***

Clint woke the next afternoon with a dry mouth and throbbing head. He might have had a drink or five too many after returning home from your apartment. How had everything gone so colossally fucking wrong in such a short period of time? He’d taken the day off intending to spend it in bed with you. Well, your plan had been to do some prep work for Thanksgiving the next day, but that wasn’t what had been on his agenda at all. Shit. Thanksgiving. At least it was only supposed to be the two of you and Wanda. His girl wouldn’t give a shit what her old man whipped up for the holiday. If she even showed. She would probably be too pissed at him to even come.

And he deserved it. He knew he did. He should have stayed well the fuck away from Y/N and continued to admire you from afar. Instead, he’d just had to have a taste. He had just wanted to know for a moment what it would be like for you to be his. God, he was an idiot.

Natasha was right. This had been different from the beginning. Hell, if he was honest, he’d been in love with you before he ever had Loki write up the damn contract. But you were supposed to be stronger than him. Than all of this mess he was now in the middle of.

You weren’t supposed to fall in love with an old man like him. And as much as he wanted to toss all of his worries and concerns aside, he couldn’t. He already knew what would happen if he did. He’d become even more tangled up with you. Until he couldn’t function—couldn’t live—without you.

And then you’d realize that behind the success, behind the money, he was nothing. That deep down he was still that dirt poor soldier with nothing more than a good aim. And he wasn’t sure he could survive that look in your eye when it happened. That utter disappointment and regret. Not from you.

He swung his feet off the bed and sat up with a groan. He dropped his head into his hands and tugged at the strands of his hair. He’d lived his life the way he had for years to avoid this bone numbing ache that settled deep in the core of him. He sucked in a breath and released it in a sob. He was so, so broken without you. But if he let himself love you, let himself live the life he so desperately wanted, it would end him when you finally left.

***

Clint was more than a little surprised when Wanda showed up late the next morning. His head was buried in the fridge trying to decide what to make when her happy hello announced her arrival via the kitchen door. He straightened with a jerk, his eyes finding her immediately and taking in her happy expression.

“I didn’t think you were coming,” he said hesitantly. Surely, you had called her. Texted. Something. She was your best friend.

Wanda frowned. “Why wouldn’t I?” She looked around. “Where’s Y/N?”

Clint groaned and let his forehead fall against the fridge.

“What did you do?”

He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, otherwise not moving. “Who says I did anything? Maybe she did something.”

She placed her fists on her hips and stared him down, waiting for him to break, to admit what he’d done.

With a sigh, he opened the fridge and pulled out a beer before sitting at the table. “Things just didn’t work out, okay?”

“No, it’s not okay. Go fix it.” She stomped her foot and for just a moment, Clint had a flash of the girl she used to be.

“I’m sorry. I know she’s your friend, but there’s no reason that has to change.” He meant the words. He really did, but he also knew that there would be no more casual swims at his house or holiday dinners together.

“Why did you start this if you weren’t going to see it through? Why her?”

“Come on, Wanda. You know you can’t predict how a relationship is going to turn out. You just jump in and hope for the best. Sometimes things work out, sometimes they don’t.” He leaned back in his seat and ran his thumbnail along the edge of the label on his bottle.

She dropped into a chair across from him. “I’m not stupid, you know. I know you didn’t care about any of those women that you went out with. That’s why I thought this would be different. I thought maybe you were finally ready to give yourself a chance to be happy.”

Clint wasn’t surprised to hear that she’d figured him out a long time ago. She was always smarter than him anyway. He kept his eyes glued to the bottle in his hand.

“You are allowed to be happy, Dad. You know that, right?”

His gaze found hers but still, he said nothing.

After the silence stretched for too long, she sighed and got back to her feet. “As much as I love you, I’m not going to let my best friend spend the day alone. Especially when it’s your fault.”

He nodded to let her know he heard and watched her walk to the door.

She stopped in the doorway to look back at him. “By the way, you look like shit.” With that she left, slamming the door behind her.

***

“Y/N?” Wanda’s voice called surprising you. She had apparently let herself in with the key you’d given her. You hadn’t been expecting her to just show up.

“Back here,” you called back and returned to your project.

“What are you…” her voice trailed off as she stepped into the doorway. She sucked in a breath and the corner of your mouth kicked up in a smile. “You’ve been busy.”

You hummed in agreement but didn’t quit working.

“Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” you asked in an attempt to dodge her question.

“Besides the fact that I know what happened? Well, sort of.” She stepped into the room and walked over to the large canvas you’d finished earlier. “If I’m not mistaken this is a hand crushing a heart made of love poems.”

You glanced at her. “Don’t you like it?”

She blinked at you and you grinned before turning back to your current piece.

She cleared her throat. “I don’t think that’s really the point here, Y/N/N.”

You didn’t respond as you kept painting.

Wanda stepped closer to you. “How long have you been working like this?”

“Since he left.” Your voice broke a little and you reached over to grab your coffee from the counter. A long swallow of the lukewarm brew and you leaned on the counter to look at your friend.

Her worried gaze ran over you taking in your paint spattered appearance. “And when was that?”

You scrunched your nose in thought before shaking your head. “When I came back from the photo lab.”

She tilted her head and her gaze sharpened. “Tuesday?”

You took another sip of the coffee and nodded.

“That was two days ago. Have you slept at all?”

You ran a hand down your face. Of course, you hadn’t slept. You were too afraid you’d see him in your dreams.  

“Have you eaten?”

“Sure.” You’d had a bowl of cereal sometime the day before and enough coffee to keep you fueled for days.

Wanda plucked the paintbrush from your hand before pushing you toward the door. “Go get in the shower. I’ll make you something to eat.”

You wanted to argue, to tell her that you had work to do but she was right. You needed food and rest and you weren’t going to get either until you were clean. You stumbled into the shower and started to scrub rich, blue paint from your hands.

By the time Wanda appeared in your room ten minutes later, you were already curled up on your bed sound asleep.  

[neutralish]

Sakamaki Subaru x Reader (part 1)

(H/L): Hair color (H/L): Hair length (F/C): Favourite color

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Silence... It was all you could hear besides the forest noises. Here you were at night wearing your nightgown, which was a simple dress, walking quietly in the forest without any destination in mind. You just got bitten again by one of the Sakamaki brothers, and as usual, they haven't been gentle with you. Your neck and wrists were sore and painful and you were feeling beyond tired but you just didn't wanted to stay at the mansion, so you decided to take a walk in the forest without any care because you just... didn't give a damn about anything. It was comprehensible: chased every day for your poor blood, being humiliated because of their sadistic sides, never had a chance to spill your feelings or being acknowledged as a human being and not as a bag of blood... You were just tired of everything and feeling emotionless which scared you! You still wanted to be optimistic. You steal wanted to feel emotions besides pain and sadness. But here you are walking like a zombie through the dark forest, in search of peace and calm.

Spotting a small river, you marched there to see it more closely. "What a stunning view," you thought, "it could make a beautiful painting... but I don't know how to paint " you deadpanned. The moon was directly shining into the river making it reflect the beauty of the water happily lapping onto it and the small fishes swimming around with some fall leaves. It indeed, made a beautiful contrast with the dark forest as the moon only seems to shone on the river.

You took a deep breath of the wet wood smell which was quite unpleasant but anyway... It's more pleasant to breathe this than the smell of an old mansion. Suddenly, a gust of wind swirled the few dead leaves that were there and your (L/H) went flying around your head. Arms crossed, you shivered "What an idiot, I should have brought a coat" you muttered while trying to reheat your arms by making up and down motions on them. In the rush of getting out of the vampires' home, you neglected the fact that it was the beginning of Fall so you only went out with your nightgown and a thin jacket.

Crack...Crack...

Upon hearing the noise, your head immediately jerked upwards," please let it not be one of them or I don't know what monster !" You silently prayed with a pleading face. Not stopping, the noise came only closer and closer to where you sat...

Crack...Crack...

Slowly rising from the rock you prepared yourself to hide down into the forest as the noises only got louder and closer. Sweat started to bead on your forehead and you felt as if you weren't breathing, your breath seems to have been stuck inside of your lunges." Seriously! I only got peace for like five minutes! Can't they go away and eat they fridge instead of me for once! "

A minute passed... then two...

"Strange..." you thought. Knowing them, they wouldn't have wasted a second in piercing down your already bruised neck and gulping down your, oh, so precious blood. "Maybe it's a cold joke... or maybe they want me to faint from fear..."Just by this thought, you were getting annoyed, heck, you were even ready to shout  "Take my damn blood already and leave me alone!" But nothing came out of your dry mouth. Taking a deep breath, you cautiously rose more from the rock and mentally prepared yourself to face the vampire...

"1...2...3..."  You turned around in a swift motion, ready to be eaten again, but nothing prepared you about the thing in front of you...

A deer... A pure and simple fucking deer watching you with big black innocents eyes. Breaking down, you erupted in laughter as you try to seat down on the rock, which was quite difficult because of your shaky legs. You had been scared of a poor fucking brown deer. "I cannot believe I have been this silly!" You laughed again "It's really brought me nothing good to live with six vampires." You said quietly, your voice still quivering with giggles.

The deer was still watching you as if you where the stranger here and not him but his eyes quickly moved to the river. "I think he came to drink" with this thought you moved alongside to let him make his way to the river. Still, the deer didn't move but his eyes where still fixed on the water as if...as if he was afraid to approach it. "Maybe he's really scared of the water". Wanting to help the poor creature, you untied your shoes, removed your long (F/C) socks and barefoot, you went into the water. Taking some in your hands, you put them in the front of the now much closer deer. Watching you first then the water he waited as if he was asking you your permission to drink. Nodding to him, you put your hands more closely. Slowly bending his head down, the deer took a few sips before suddenly jerking his head up scrutinizing his surroundings.

Tension started to rose again inside of you as you started the search the thing that scared the deer.  "Please be another deer, please be another deer !" Your heart was beating more and more loudly and at a strange pace as your eyes tried to size the dark shape of the forest. The wind only blew more loudly, swirling the dead leaves around and the small noises of the forest were getting worse as if it was announcing the arrival of something dangerous.

Sensing the danger the deer ran away in the forest leaving you all alone... "Dear God, have mercy on me and let it be another animal " you muttered, nervously watching your surroundings. If only you knew that going in near a river means tension plus danger then you would have stayed in this damn mansion!

Abruptly, everything stopped... You tensed at once, your senses where high on every sight, noise or even smell. That when you felt... no... you knew that someone was behind you. Without a second thought, you violently turned around the see the one who disturbed your tranquil moment.

Sakamaki Subaru

You didn't know if you should feel happy or afraid...

Of course, you were more than happy to see him and not Ayato or Laito or even Kanato (you didn't imagine Shu or Reiji going out in the forest) but you knew that the white-haired boy was quiet violent and could break everything with a single flick. Fully turning your body toward him, you stood still in the water, your gaze fixated on him, not daring to even lift a finger.

Frankly, Subaru was a beautiful boy despite his attitude and the eternal scowl present on his face. His light snow pink hair who seemed fluffy and his stunning red ruby eyes made him and his features unique. It only goes well with his really light skin and his body shape. Your trail of thought only stopped when you saw his mouth moving. "I'm sorry,  did you said something? " you asked in a barely audible voice. "The heck are you doing here ?!" His voice was harsh as he spoke to you dryly. " I was trying to find a quiet place because... you all piss me off." You bluntly spoke. What was the point of lying to him, you didn't wanted to get (more) on his bad side so might as well be honest. His scowl only got deeper but he said nothing. With a "tch " Subaru stopped looking at you as his gaze started to take notice of his surroundings.

Right now you were dreading to ask him if he came here for your blood as you silently watched him... but maybe he didn't wanted it right now... you were just afraid to ask because if you did so maybe he would do it and you were already in the verge of fainting! So you just keep quiet in this awkward situation. The silence was back again but it wasn't as peaceful as a moment ago, it was this kind of silence that wanted to make you want to do anything to fill it. The problem was that you haven't any subject to talk about, you didn't even know if you have something in common with him. Plus he was difficult to talk with as he either ignore you or either threw his fist of rage on you. You never saw anything else on his face than a frown. You were sure that once, Laito told you that Subaru was a tsundere ... keyword: a tsundere. Sure you saw him getting embarrassed but he expressed it by breaking a wall or by insulting everything and anything but never in your life you saw him blushing.

"The heck you're looking at!" Subaru suddenly screamed, breaking the awkward silence, startled by his sudden outburst you jolted in the water. "Nothing Sir !" You said in panic... Wait did you just said sir to a boy of sixteen years!? Wanting to pass this embarrassing moment you went on with your dreadful question "Hum... you're not going to drink my blood ?" you asked with your broken voice as your mouth was dry. "Tch, these bastards tainted your blood with their filthy fangs. How can enjoy it !" "Oh... That's great... I suppose " "Don't get cocky, I'll drink your blood as soon as you recover." A small smirk danced on his face for some seconds before disappearing, "How weak are you, letting these idiots drink your blood " Spatted the snow haired.

Isn't this brat getting a little bit too much arrogant...

Your face was twitching in annoyance as you tried to remain calm" Excuse me my dear vampire but as you can see... I'm a mere human so... I cannot fucking fight a vampire!" It was a matter of fact, unfortunately, how could you beat a vampire when his strength was ten thousand times stronger than yours! Your only strength was seen through your words as you spoke little but think big.

Not wanting to talk to him anymore, you turned again to watch your feet in the water, enjoying the pleasant filling. You heard Subaru moving, getting closer to where you were. From the corner of your eye, you saw him sitting down on the wet grass looking up at the moon, mimicking him, you looked up. The moon was still beautiful and his light only shone more brightly showing your and Subaru's beauty as the wind only blew more calmly than before.

Twenty minutes passed at least before Subaru broke the silence " Back then when I gave you the knife... why didn't you killed me or my brothers? You were still watching the moon as you pondered over the question with a frown on your face."Hum... How to put this... I was shocked about these sudden situations, I mean it's not every day that you see a bunch of vampires at the same time or is being pursued every hour or asked to do strange things. But the thing is that...I didn't have the strength to kill, vampire or not..."

This response was partially true of course there had been a time when you planned to kill them but how could you? They knew every movement of yours and you were getting weaker each time they take your life vessel. But the thing was that you were quiet observant despite being physically weak. You knew that, somehow, Subaru was in depression... You weren't totally sure but the way he gave you the knife and asked you to kill him first then his brother put you on this trail. It was almost a plea for uncertain freedom. That why you first wanted to know him better in order to somehow help him 'cause you knew how hard is it to handle depression or anxiety alone. The feeling of not wanting to live or to feel a burden for the world where the worst. So how could you try to kill him? He didn't even saw the good side of life so how could you even try? True, he was a sadist and much more than mean toward you but with the little kindness left in you, you wanted to help Subaru (and maybe his brothers ).

Upon hearing your answer, Subaru watched you in a mean way "Are you an idiot ?! You could be fucking free doing whatever stupid humans usually do and YOU here, stay with a bunch of bastards! Are you this much of a masochistic?!" "Wow..." you thought "is he calling himself a bastard ? " you kept quiet, not knowing what to say. You stared back at your feet who were getting colder but you just didn't wanted to move from the water. As strange as it was you were more feeling safe in the water than on the grass. Subaru was still angrily mumbling about "stupid brainless humans ". True or not, you really did thought that vampires and humans were not so different... Each of them has a complex personality and they are all too hard to understand. The only difference, for you, is that vampires have too much pride and arrogance to compare themselves to humans.

"Say, Subaru?" You began, he spatted a harsh "What?" before you continued, "Are you feeling okay right now? " you asked in a calm and innocent voice. Silence followed your question. You turned your gaze towards him and looked at his face. You tried to read his emotions but all you could see was a face voided of emotion... even his eyes were more dull and blank than a moment ago! "Maybe I shouldn't have asked..."

"Who the fuck do you think you are to meddle in my life!" He told you in a heavy angry voice. He got up from his place with an angry scowl on his face  "Don't you dare to ask me any questions again or I won't hesitate to break you! Approach me again and I won't hesitate to destroy you! "Watching you with mad eyes, he turned his back before disappearing right before your eyes. You weren't going to lie, you were taken a bit aback by his sudden outburst. Sure you knew that he wasn't going to easily open up to you but you didn't expect this...

Vampire or not, he was still a child in his heart, afraid of everything, of the world and not knowing how to seek help and love. Him running- more like disappearing- from your question was comprehensible.

That's why you still wanted to try to help a little bit at least. It's not that you liked him in a romantic way, it's just brought in you a kind of maternal instinct (even though you were only seventeen years old). "Ah, ~ guess next time will be better... if he even comes back here..." You sure planned to return here as it was better than "your home ".

The moon was slowly going higher."Oh my, almost time to go back to school". You gave a last look to the moon before stretching your arms and shoulders while yawning from the lack of sleep. Getting out of the cold water, you putted your shoes back without your socks, because your legs were still wet. A cold wind passed through your legs causing you to shiver again" Next time, I'll be sure to bring a towel." Heading towards the forest you just hopped for one thing" I hope they won't get mad at me for disappearing like this" just by this thought, you wanted to go back in the river but you knew you couldn't... Hopefully, the Sakamaki will be more lenient towards you.

First one-shot, hope that you'll all like it ( sorry in advance for grammar mistakes😣). I'll probably do it in two or three shots.

Neutralish

[helplessly-nonstop]

Depression (B. Wyatt series)

Hey, it’s Cassie and I actually have a series for you this time! Description, would you be a doll and tel our lovely readers what they’ve stumbled upon!

Honey Bee, or the reader, is a poem blogger and they meet a depressed Abigail Wyatt. As time passes by, they grow closer. But an abusive relationship separates the two and on Honey Bee’s visit to Florida, they realize that it’s too little too late. It will be a three part series: Depression, Impression, and Succesion. Please enjoy and don’t repost to other sites. Because I will find you and I will end you. Cool? Cool. My beta was my favorite soulmate: @sporadic-fics! (Go read her stuff, I love it all)

WC:2454 (the next two parts will ((more than likely)) be longer)

Warnings: depictions of an abusive relationship, mentions of murder, thoughts of suicide, Klandy Borton is a garbage human, character death, mentions of child abuse, anyway, here we go! (GIF was found on Google)

I was a social butterfly on all counts and one person had confided in me when I had posted a poem about suicide on my blog. Her name was Abigail Wyatt and she admitted that she wasn’t having the best life that she could be living. She and her two brothers lost their parents when they were young and unfortunately was pushed into the foster system.

Years had passed and there was multiple families that neglected and abused them, until finally, the oldest brother turned eighteen and they were taken from foster care under his watch. I took her under my wing, even though we had never met in person, but from there, we traded war stories. I explained where I got my inspiration to write and she told me all about her brothers: Bo and Bray.

Bo was apparently very outgoing and she confided in me that she believed that he was gay, which made me giggle a little. When she asked me why I laughed, I informed her that in sets of three siblings, there’s usually at least one that is a member of the LGBTQ+ community. She laughed with me for a while then continued telling me about her family.

Bray was the quietest of the three, with an aura of danger surrounding him, and she stated that she was often worried about what he might do if he had to protect his siblings from serious harm. I assured her that she should have nothing to worry about, but to be honest, there was no way of being sure.

But things went from good to bad for Abigail after a while. She had met a man by the name of Randy Orton and she told me that she had loved him like she had never loved anyone before.

“Abigail, are you sure that you truly know what kind of person this guy is? I just don’t want you getting hurt, that’s all.” I stated, bumping my apartment door shut with my hip. My hands were full with groceries while my phone was squished between my shoulder and cheek, something that was definitely uncomfortable. When I realized that I didn’t get it closed all the way, I raised my foot and kicked it in to its place.

“Oh, Honey Bee, I couldn’t be more sure! He’s so sweet and considerate, never late to pick me up! He works at the police station here in town!”she informed me, a small, dreamy sigh leaving her throat. I gave a laugh and set my bags on the ground before kicking my shoes off my feet.

“All right, as long as you know you’re safe with him. I’m going to get off of here and make some dinner.Tell Bo that I said hello!”

“Oh don’t lie to me, Honey Bee, you’re going to order in Panda Express for dinner cause you don’t want to cook.”she scolded but her soft giggle assured me that she wasn’t truly shaming me. I gave a grin then ended the call, beginning to put my food away in the sections that it belongs to. I laid on my couch for a few moments and stared at the ceiling before I decided that I was going to succumb to my ridiculous addiction to Chinese takeout.

Forty five minutes passed and finally, my food arrived, allowing me to retreat into my room properly. A small chirp through my phone drew me away from my bingeing of Brooklyn Nine Nine and I rolled away to check who texted me and raised an eyebrow when I realized that it wasn’t just any number: it was Abigail: Leave her alone or I swear to God, you’ll fucking die.

I jerked up out of bed and stared at the screen, unsure of how to react to this message. Apparently Abby hasn’t told her boyfriend that her closest friend just happened to be a person halfway across the country. I paced the length of my room and finally paused, deciding that I would call her in the morning. She was obviously with Randy tonight and I didn’t want to risk her getting hurt because I want to discuss her possibly dangerous boyfriend.

I set my half eaten sweet and sour chicken in the fridge and returned to my bed, staring at my clock, hoping that I could fix whatever Abigail had gotten herself into with this guy before it was too late.

With a quick roll to the right, I hit the floor with a groan, looking through the window to see that it was now daylight and snowing. Fantastic.

I pulled myself back to my feet and checked my phone to see if I had received any new messages that I should’ve been worried about. Luckily, there was just one and it really was from Abby this time. I swiped upwards then pressed in my thumbprint before reading what she sent me,”Hey, sorry about that last text! Randy can get a bit jealous. Don’t worry, tho, explained it all!”

I hesitated on what I should say, my thumbs hovering over the text keys, then I decided that I needed to see her face when I asked her these questions that had been brewing in my head all night. I guess worrying about the possibility that your friend’s boyfriend is a psycho really doesn’t let you sleep at night.

“You home alone?” I sent back in return, hoping that she’d give me the okay to FaceTime her. A few seconds skimmed by then she answered, ”Yeah, Randy left for work early today.”

A small sigh left me, my shoulders dropping in relief, then I pressed the button to go ahead and call. It rang three times and she finally picked up on the fourth one, her face slowly coming into focus. But that’s when I noticed it.

“Oh my God, Abigail, do you have a black eye?!” I demanded, leaning forward for a better look. She brushed a timid hand over her injury and reassured me, ”It’s fine, I hit the door knob cause I slipped. No big deal, I promise.”

“Abigail, I don’t think you really know this guy. I mean, he threatened to kill me and he doesn’t even know me!” Her eyes flashed with uncertainty and I began to say something else when she rushed out,”It’s fine, I fixed it! He’s gonna change, I swear it, Honey Bee! It’s fine, now, please, can we just talk about something else?”

And stupid, idiotic me being me, I allowed her to change the subject. But things didn’t become fine and Randy most certainly didn’t change.

Months passed and I began hearing from my friend less and less frequently, something that was uncommon for her. Eventually, time for my semi annual visit down to Florida had arrived and before I knew it, I was getting settled in my usual little hotel that I stayed in. I decided to FaceTime her to make sure that she was at home, since it was Thursday and she didn’t work today.

Her phone rang four times and for a moment, I thought she was going to let me go to voicemail, when she finally picked up. A gasp escaped me at her appearance and I stared at her with my mouth agape, unsure on what to say.

Her cheek was swollen, her black eye barely concealed, and her bottom lip was busted. But really frightened me was the bruises maring her throat. It was obvious that she was at her house, but there had been drastic changes made.

“Abigail, what happened?” I murmured, pressing my hand to my mouth, as if it could stop the tears brewing in my eyes. She began to give an excuse when someone snatched away the phone, shouting,”Fuck off, it’s none of your fucking business!” And with that, the screen went dark. I stared at my phone for a few moments then finally, I acted on what I knew needed to be done. I called the emergency number for Brooksville, Florida, desperate to send help for my friend.

“Hello, 911, is everything alright?”

“No! No, I think my friend is in danger. I called her and she looks like her boyfriend is beating her! When I asked what happened, he took her phone and smashed it. Please, could you send someone out to check on her?” I rushed out as calmly as I could manage. The man on the other end paused for a quick second and I thought that he might’ve hung up on me then he asked,”Do you know what the address is?”

I began tossing items from my purse then finally dragged my planner out, flipping to all of the addresses I had written down and thankfully, I had Abigail’s. I recited it back to the operator and I could hear him clicking on the keyboard before he answered,”Okay, we are sending in a patrol car now to check on your friend. Do you know what the boyfriend’s name is?”

I began telling him it then paused, remembering one of the few details that Abigail provided me about this dick fuck: he worked at the police department. Cops had a history of hiding domestic abuse cases like this when one of their own was the abuser and I was not about to let Abigail be let down by a corrupt system.

“No, I’m sorry, I don’t. I hope that’s okay.” I apologized, fake sympathy leaking into my voice.

“It’s alright, not a problem. Alright, it sounds like the patrol car is there now. Would you like to stay on the line with me, see if your friend is okay right away?”

“Yes, please, you could.” Silence hit the line and I waited with bated breath to hear what was going on then I heard words that I never wanted to hear.

“Shots fired, shots fired! One officer down, suspect is deceased, victim is critical. We need a bus!” Faint shouting rose through the phone and I ended the call quickly, unsure of what to do. My hands fidgeted, tossing my phone back and forth, then finally, decided to go digging through our past conversations in search of her brother’s number. I knew I should’ve saved it when she first sent it to me.

Two hours passed and I was barely a month through our texts when my phone began ringing with the caller ID as someone from Brooksville, Florida. I quickly picked up then asked,”Hello?”

“Hi, I’m lookin’ for a person by the name of Hunny Bee?”a man questioned, his voice something of a phone sex operator. He had somewhat of an accent and I realized that I knew that drawl. It was Bray, Abigail’s oldest brother. He somehow got my number and was calling me, hopefully with intentions of delivering good news.

“This is them. Is Abigail alright?” I asked, nibbling on my nails. A small sigh escaped his mouth then he stated,”I think you need to meet us down at the hospital, sweetheart.” I paused at his statement then began nodding as I agreed,”Of course, I’ll grab a cab and be there in ten.”

I snatched my bag from the bed and darted out the door, already ending the call with Bray and dialing for an Uber.

I rushed into the hospital and slammed my hands on the desk, rushing out,”I’m looking for Abigail Wyatt.” The man running the desk looked upwards and said with a monotone, ”Can’t if you’re not family.”

“I’m her sister in law and I suggest if you don’t want her brother in your face, you need to fucking tell me what room they’re in.” I snapped, cracking my knuckles. He rolled his eyes and clicked a few tabs on the keyboard before informing me where they were.

I rushed upstairs and began scanning the room numbers for Abigail’s when I heard someone call my name. I turned on my heel and watched as Bo came into view.

“Bo! Have you heard anything yet?” I rushed out after he crushed me into a hug. He pulled away and I watched his face crumble, giving away exactly what fate my dearest friend had met. Another man stepped beside us and I immediately connected who it was: Bray, the oldest of the Wyatt siblings.

“By the time that the police had arrived, it appears that Randall shot her. They warned him to lower his weapon but instead, he fired at the cops who in return, shot him. I’m very sorry, but Abigail has passed.”he informed me and for a second, the briefest of moments, there was silence, then my mind shattered.

“No! She- she can’t be gone, oh my god, how could I let this happen,I should’ve known, I should have pushed her to get help.” I sobbed, my knees buckling from underneath me. Bray caught me by my arms and lowered me to the ground, allowing me to continue my breakdown. He petted my hair and informed me,”Abigail knew the risks. You did everything you could do, it’s not your fault that she didn’t heed the warnings you were giving to her.”

“But-but I could’ve helped her more, could’ve convinced her to break it off with him.”

“Sweetheart, even if she would’ve tried, I imagine that the same result would’ve came along. This will not fall on your delicate shoulders.” Bray assured me, bringing me to my feet. I let out a sniffle and he offered,”Let me take you back to the house, you can rest there. Bo and I have some… arrangements to take care of.” My mind filled in his pause and I gave a stiff nod, muttering,”All my stuff is back at my hotel though.” He rubbed a calloused thumb over my cheek and said,”If you give me your key, I will retrieve your items and bring it back. I don’t think you need to be alone right now.”

“I-I don’t know why I’m not comforting you… you’re the one who lost his sister.” I murmured, lifting my head. He gave a stiff smile and replied,”Indeed I did.. but you gave her life. After she met you, she was like a beacon for us. You blessed her with light when darkness was being to consume her very being. Thank you… for everything that you did for Abigail.” I nodded then he dropped Bo and I at the house to settle in while he went to go get my items from my hotel room. It was going to take a while for me to fully come to terms about what the hell had taken place over the last couple weeks.

[kirstenlinae]

Coming to Terms

I should be doing the dishes in order to prep for dinner tonight. I've had thawed out chicken sitting in the fridge for a few days now. I want to make breaded, air-fried chicken with some broccoli cheddar rice and brussel sprouts. I know my boyfriend will appreciate it seeing as how for the last two or three nights we have eaten out, garbage I might add. My boyfriend said that I've been "royally fucking up" my diet (or something to that effect). He is correct. My eating has been horrible since Saturday night and boy, do I feel it. I have been keeping up on my insulin, water intake and exercise, however. So, I haven't exactly taken two steps backward or anything. I miss how I felt before Saturday... positive and full of energy. To be honest, I think that I am eating emotionally.

I have decided that I want to go back to school for nursing. However, I know that I really shouldn't start taking any classes until well after my surgery (summer semester at the soonest). I have a couple of options. I could go back for my MSN, which requires about 7 pre-requisite classes before I can be fully accepted into the program I am interested in. I will have to pay for the pre-requisite classes out of pocket...which will be thousands of dollars, even if I take them at the local community college. If financial aid doesn't work out for my MSN program then, at least if I pay out of pocket at the community college, I could keep going for my two-year RN there. I don't trust the pre-requisite track that the university wants me to take. I don't think those classes will transfer anywhere in case anything should go awry. Anyway, I think that my coming to terms with the barriers to furthering my education is what is causing me to emotionally eat. See, I have maxed out my student loans so, I'm not going to get any help there. I work part-time right now, due to this surgery and of course, my job has no benefits, let alone a tuition reimbursement program. I could probably take two classes at a time. It would be a struggle financially but, not impossible. If I can only afford one class at a time, then it will take me over two years to finish my pre-requisites. I prayed about it today. If it's in God's will, I know he will make a way...

[trashyazeohane]

Finally done with this one! Huff puff!

Part 1 can be found here!

Anyway, let’s jump onto this ride! (I love fluff okay!? Fluff and angst… but mostly angst xD)

Adult!Maxvid!AU - Part 8 (forgetting is hard, though everyone is trying):

im so fucking borrreeeeeeeddddd…

David blinked, staring at his phone. Max wrote to him, the very next day after meeting at Gwen’s!

He felt a flutter of happiness sparkling in his chest as he answered and the pocketed his phone, so the kids in his class wouldn’t get a glimpse of the foul language.

Through the day they exchanged few more messages. David scolded Max for writing during classes, but to be honest he was kinda… happy Max wrote to him.

It felt like some part of their friendship was back.

David was still kinda stressed. There was this something thumping at the back of his head whenever he opened Max’s messages and he hoped it would disappear with time.

Though there were times where his mind still couldn’t comprehend what had happened.

The first time David saw Max picking up Little Star after that night, he was kinda nervous, but the meeting went smoothly. However David kinda could feel the tension in the air.

But they talked and this was what mattered.

And like that passed two weeks, with the tightness in David’s throat getting smaller and smaller with every short meeting and another message on his phone.

(Back to Max) ->

It felt amazing, Max concluded, to be able to write once again with David. Nikki immediately noticed his better mood.

Max still felt guilty, of course, but mostly he was happy.

Though he would deny feeling it, if someone asked him! Fucking no, nu-huh!

Nikki was still teasing him, like fricking a lot! Everything started to move to its rightful place. Well, almost everything.

David didn’t ask him to come over to his house. And well, Max couldn’t really blame him? Because the last time Max had been there he had had the best night of his life. But it hadn’t been the best night of David’s life. And he probably regretted it on so many levels.

(It hurt him, but he couldn’t really blame David)

Talking with David via messages on phone was fine. Seeing him for few short minutes during the week was fine.

(No, it wasn’t, but he couldn’t really do much about it.)

So like that passed two weeks, then another one. The weekend rolled and Max found out that he was out of food. What the fuck!?! He had bought a lot of it few days ago!

(But yeah, one night Nikki had eaten everything from his fridge)

So this was how Max found himself – outside the store with at least five bags and a fucking storm roaming around.

Fuck. And he didn’t have an umbrella! But maybe if he could run…

- thunder cracked dangerously close –

…No can do.

So Max stood there, outside the supermarket and damn! his hands started to hurt. Plus his meat! He needed to put it in a fridge (it was on a promotion, so Max doubted it could live long outside of a fridge)

What to do? Maybe he should call a taxi? But ugh… the money. Plus –

He took out his phone. Yep, it was dead. Great…

This wasn’t his day, fuck –

“Max?”

Max blinked and turned his head.

Shit, it was David, standing there, and Max’s heart leaped so high into his throat that it was almost painful.

“Oh…” Max said, and fuck he wasn’t sure how he managed to sound deadpanned, but he somehow did it. “Hey David.”

“What are you doing here?” David asked, stepping closer to him. He himself had few bags in his hands.

“Shopping, duh?” Max answered, trying to sound casual and as Max as he could, but damn, he was nervous.

David blinked, but instead of getting offended by his tone, he chuckled softly.

Damn, fuck his heart, fuck everything.

“I meant here, outside.”

Ohhhh… damn.

“It’s raining like batshit fucking crazy and I don’t have an umbrella. Plus I kinda don’t want to be killed by a thunder.” And just like on cue another lightning struck through the dark, gray sky and the sound made even David flinch. “Yeah, that.”

“Oh.” David mumbled, looking past Max’s shoulder at the rain cutting through the air with a strict precision.

They stood there for few minutes, staring at the heavily drizzling water pouring from the sky. Max moved his weight from one leg to another, to move it back few seconds later. He could see David stealing glance after glance at him, few times opening his mouth, but still with no words coming out.

Just say what you want to say!

It took David another minute or so, before he opened his mouth:

“Do you want to go to my house?” David asked, slowly, hesitantly, unsure and there was something at the end of this sentence that made Max flinch. Some particle of fear.

However Max turned to David with wide eyes and hope blooming in his chest and found himself asking:

“Are you sure?”

There was an unspoken question, a hidden agreement, a covered understanding of the situation.

David stared at him and Max could almost see hundred or thousand of different thoughts flying through his mind.

It felt like eternities passed before Max heard a reply.

“Yeah.”

Max glanced at the rain.

“We need to run to get there. You are aware of that?”

“Yes, but it’s better to run for five minutes, than stand here for God knows how long.” David added with a smile. “Plus it’s starting to get cold.”

“That is true.” Max said, feeling his fingers getting quite chilly.

There was another beat of silence. Max opened his mouth, feeling the eagerness seeping into his voice.

“So we’re running?”

“Yeah.” David answered breathlessly.

And so they jumped out from under the roof of the supermarket and ran to David’s house.

Max would deny it till the end of his life, but he could feel himself smiling, especially as he heard David giggling behind him. That slow poke.

Even though they maybe ran for four or so minutes, when they reached David’s house they were still soaked.

Max was still kinda stressed when David was taking out the keys to put them in a lock. Thousands of memories were running through his mind, but he tried to push them all back and down.

“Put your things in the fridge if you want. I’ll be right back.” David said, after he took off his shoes, and glanced at him.

Yet there was some strained tone at the end of this sentence and some robotic rhythm to David’s steps as he moved to his own room.

Max put few ingredients in the fridge and then waited for David in the kitchen, taking a first good look at the apartment after what had happened between them. It looked the same – he remembered every book on the shelf, every plant, every stain on the couch – and yet Max felt like he was staring at it for the very first time.

“Here.” David said and then threw something on his head, blocking his sight. “Dry your hair so you won’t catch a cold.”

Oh a towel.

David himself had a fluffy white towel on his hair.

Max started to brush his hair with the towel, observing David from between his wet locks as he moved around the kitchen, busying himself with hiding food in the fridge and cupboards. His movements still weren’t relaxed, there was some hidden tension, some stress pulling strings inside his body, a lagging program directing his movements.

Max couldn’t really blame him, but some part of him was deeply hurt.

Ten minutes later the rain was still pouring heavily outside. David was about to put the eggs away, but he glanced at the window and bit his bottom lip.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?”

Max turned around, from his position near the sink, to stare at David who was in front of the opened fridge. He played with the box of eggs, tilting it and then twirling around.

(He was selfish)

“It depends on what you’re making.”

David glanced at the eggs and then at the fridge, only to finally turn to Max.

“Spaghetti Carbonara?”

Max shrugged.

“Sounds edible enough.”

At that David chuckled softly under his nose and put the eggs on the counter.

After that they worked mostly in silence. The radio in David’s kitchen accompanied them with a soft tune of old songs. After some time David started to hum the lyrics or the rhythm. It was awkward at first, with the tense atmosphere, but it was dissolving slowly, step after step, diluting the thickness around them.

They started even a small conversation.

When they finished making food, they sat in the living room on two different couches with the turned on TV and plates on their laps. Just like they had used to. They ate while watching some random movie – with the rain outside turning into a drizzle, only to finally stop pouring altogether.

When they finished eating, Max washed the dishes, glancing at the window and David few times.

“I should be going.”

“Already?” David asked, looking up from his place on the couch.

“Yeah.”

David clearly wasn’t one hundred percent comfortable around Max, and he didn’t want David to feel like an outcast in his own home, so he decided to return to the dorm. He was just happy David asked him over in the first place.

Max packed his things from the fridge and then moved to the door.

“Will you message me after returning to your room?”

It was dark outside, but it wasn’t even nearly late.

“Sure.” Max said, putting on his scarf and grabbing his groceries. “Take care.”

“You too.”

And with that Max went out.

He messaged David when he returned to the dorm, because when he had forgot to do it last time, David had sent him like five messages later. Plus Max didn’t want to worry him.

(Stupid heart, making him do stupid things)

(Back to David ->)

David was kinda glad Max went out, but he was also like fricking sad by it and he wasn’t sure how to deal with two so different emotions. He wasn’t as comfortable around Max as he used to – which was dumb, because he knew Max wouldn’t simply jump on him. Though he couldn’t stop the stress from forming in his stomach.

But David was also sad, because he hated spending time alone. The house was too empty with only him inside, too lonely, too hollow – even with the radio always turned on and plants or flowers put in every possible place.

Gladly soon after his phone pipped up happily and David quickly grabbed it, mouth twitching into a soft smile after seeing that Max got safely to his dorm.

So time slowly moved forward, with the invisible, awkward atmosphere around them dissipating slowly.

Two weeks later, he made quite too big dinner (but come on, he had to use those tomatoes, other way they would turn bad) and even though he was still kinda nervous about all of that had happened, he messaged Max if he wanted to come over to eat.

Max answered few minutes later, asking if he could bring Nikki over. That idea was a little soothing.

They came over not even fifteen minutes later, with Nikki busting into his house like she owned this place.

“David, my man, free food! Sign me the fuck up!” She shouted, kicking her shoes, not even sparing a glance where they were landing.

David chuckled at that, especially as the girl was already next to him, trying to eat the meat from the pot and he had to swat her hand away.

“Ah ah! Few more minutes!”

So Nikki and Max sat at the table and started chatting about their Uni life, telling David bizarre stories from their dorm. Some of them were funny and some utterly terrifying. David loved every one of them.

And oh, his house felt so much better with someone inside.

Soon after they were eating the food and enjoying a simple evening.

But Nikki wouldn’t be Nikki, if she didn’t ask if David had alcohol. At that David twitched, even though he didn’t want to, with eyes flickering to Max for a brief second.

It was okay, it was okay, it was okay…

“No, Nikki, I’m sorry…” David said, with an apologetic smile on his lips. “Gwen is usually the one with alcohol in her house.”

“Shame.” Nikki said, laying down on the table. “Next time we’re going to Gwen for free food, Max.”

“Why the fuck would I go to Gwen’s house again?”

“For free food! And alcohol!”

Max groaned and then glanced at David, like he was searching for help, but David could only chuckle in reply and shrug.

In the end David enjoyed the evening and soon after he even forgot all about feeling uncomfortable.

Heh, maybe the situation between him and Max wasn’t the worst.

(Back to Max ->)

“Nik, this is literally the worst…”

“What is the worst?” Nikki asked, popping a giant bubble from a bubblegum and almost getting it all over her face.

“David is the worst…” Max grumbled.

“David? I think he is cool! He gave us free food! Like in free and in food, two best things in life!”

“I know… and that’s why he is the worst…”

“Because he did something nice?”

“He is always doing something nice!” Max slapped his hand over his face and dragged it down. “Even after I acted like a fucktard.”

“Hmm fucktard is a pretty fitting word here.” Nikki stated, grinning like crazy and blowing another bubble.

Even though Nikki was kinda or totally right, Max still popped her bubblegum balloon.

“Hey, rude!” Nikki yelped and then slowly started to get rid of the pink gum in her hair. “I mean, he is definitely trying to get your friendship back, that is for sure. Which I think is really nice.”

“That is the problem!”

“Erm David being nice is a problem now? I’m confused!”

“Yes!” Max threw his hands in the air. “Because by him being nice I feel like I l…” Oh, he bit his lip in time.

“Like you like him more and more?” Nikki added, grinning from ear to ear.

Max flushed bright red and turned his head away.

There were few minutes filled with silence as they moved slowly through the quiet and almost empty city.

“I know he is trying hard to get… whatever friendship we had…” Max mumbled, feeling his chest constricting with every word leaving his lips. “But I don’t want that…”

He thought he did, he thought. But he was wrong. So, so very wrong.

“I don’t wanna be friends. I want…” Max took deep breath, combing his hand through his black, curly locks. “I want to be something… more?”

Nikki blew another giant bubble and then asked:

“Does David even know what you feel towards him?”

“No, I don’t… think so…”

Nikki hummed loudly, smacking her lips.

“Well… maybe it’s not the worst situation right now.”

Max glanced at her, kinda perplexed.

“I mean, if he knew, he could get… scared after you two fucked.” Max flinched internally, but there was some kind of a thread of truth intertwining with Nikki’s words. “But he doesn’t know that, so maybe not all hope is lost?” Nikki then ruffled her hair. “I don’t think I make much sense, but well, have you considered trying to be something more now? Like I dunno, I know being nice isn’t your best trait, but maybe do that but like more?” She then huffed and let her hand drop. “Do you even get what I want to say?”

“I think I got the gist of it.” Max murmured, even though he wasn’t sure really.

“It’s just… I’ve seen you dealing with this for few years by now. If you don’t do something, nothing will change.”

There were few steps filled with silence, until Max slowly opened his mouth.

“What if this doesn’t work?” He licked his lips. “What if David doesn’t… like me back, even though I will try?”

“Well, you definitely won’t know until you try.” Nikki shrugged. “But hey, if something like this happens… it’s still a problem for future you, so why should you worry about it now?”

Indeed, why?

Until they reached the dorm they didn’t move this topic anymore. They said their goodbyes and moved to their separate rooms.

Later Max laid down in his bed for few more minutes, maybe even full hour, staring at the ceiling and thinking about what Nikki had told him. Because she was right. He never had done anything with his crush – he just had left it there and had hoped it would disappear. But it hadn’t disappeared. It simply had grown and transformed into something that wasn’t a childish crush anymore.

And it gnawed at Max, it nibbled at his consciousness, because damn he had enough. He had enough of wanting to do something and not being able to. It didn’t have to be anything sexual, fuck, it was even pretty low on the list of things he wanted. He wanted this normalness that came with being with someone – being able to hold their hand, feeling them smiling at you, feeling the warmness spreading over your heart whenever they would peck your cheek.

Feeling that you were alive and loved.

(God, he sounded cheesy!)

But he never had done anything with it. He just had swept his feelings under a carpet and had ignored them, hoping that they would disappear. But they hadn’t and he was tired of pretending they weren’t there.

These few weeks without David – without his cheesy and warm messages, without him hanging with Max, doing nothing and talking about everything and nothing at all in the same time – were terrible and… damn…

He had to do something, because fuck… he wanted this.

Because Nikki was right – doing nothing won’t change a thing.

So Max grabbed his phone, brushed his finger on the screen and clicked David’s name in the contact list.

thanks for the food

No, not enough. Something more.

g’night, you doofus

Maybe it wasn’t much, but it still made Max’s heart thrum heavily inside his chest. Especially when few seconds later he received a reply.

No problem :) :) :) Sweet dreams, Max :D

Yeah, he wanted to try.

Lol, nothing happened in this part, why it took me so long to write this xDDDD? But idk, I like the slow paced story~ Anywayyyyyyyy, stay tuned for Max actually trying!?! What!?

[randoreviews]

A FRIEND’S VACATION EMAIL

     My wife and I will actually be taking turns writing this. We did a lot of planning in advance (a LOT of planning) and it paid off in spades. You ever hear of the app BUNK? Highly recommend.      Let’s skip the part about our faucet making a weird noise before we left home. Maybe it would be magically fixed by the time we got back! Wouldn’t that be great. Believe it or not, this was our first trip to Europe together. We’d been to Canada (not so exotic, I know), we’d been to Mexico, and we’d been to the tropics. I get a little nervous before flying, so we did some quick breathing exercises at the gate and then, to be honest, what helped even more, I had a Xanax and a glass of wine and was out like a light, as my grandmother used to say.      We were both a little crabby after the flight, being in a new place, being deprived of real oxygen for the last however many hours, but we were also excited to have arrived and to be there, where we were, finally. The first place we stayed was in the countryside in the quaintest little cottage (which we found using the BUNK app, of course... such a lifesaver). Well, before this, at the airport, I’ll just say, when we were waiting for a taxi there was this really old Chinese man sitting nearby smoking a cigarette. Super creepy. I don’t know why. I guess I wasn’t expecting to see anybody Chinese. And why the cigarette? One of us also may have kicked a duck as we were walking up to the cottage. We didn’t really know how else to negotiate the situation. One of those things where it all happened so fast, and you’re purely reacting off of instinct, that it’s in the books before you know it. It was of a bad attitude, it charged at us. Thankfully it didn’t die. What are the memories of those things, I wonder? It would have recognized us had it seen us again, no? It made for a bit of a saucy, bit of a suspenseful aspect of the trip. Would we see this duck again?       After that we washed ourselves a little bit and got some proper rest, like in a bed, to try to counteract the jet lag. When we woke up, or half-awake, we made tender love. We brought a ball gag. It gets a little weird sometimes. But you have to try to keep things interesting. We had taken the ball gag to Mexico before, so we were confident traveling with it. Immediately following, one of us had the crazy idea of getting a mound of booger sugar from, who knows, maybe Phil the farmer just down the dirt lane and spending the whole vacation indoors playing games and getting weird. We were really excited about this for a minute. But nooo, we told ourselves. We haaad to go walk by the sea and get pictures taken of ourselves and all the usual hooey. We haaad to try this cheese and that scotch and buy knickknacks for Otis the dogsitter, who was completely made up, we didn’t even have a dog. Buy knickknacks for SOMEBODY.       We walked down to the market in the morning. Old women selling fruit, this type of thing. Veeery charming, very, very charming. We bought many fruits. I would always try to have a dispute with the fruit seller, usually beginning by mocking their voice and then saying that the guy in the next stall over had much better fruit. Just to get their engines revved up a little bit. You understand. At one point a lady almost came at me with a knife. Solid woman, easily a buck eighty, if not more. If she had lunged at me, I would have sidestepped and dropped her with a right cross. Not that I wanted this to happen, not at all. But I’ll admit, the possibility excited me. Would not have been the first time I had coaxed an old lady into an altercation. It’s a marshmallow world out there.      We had a nice lunch in a pub. Some fish and chips. Some vittles. A few Beefeaters. It’s amazing how much a few gins can change the complexion of your day. The rest of the day can only be described as “ginny,” and I’m not talking Forrest Gump. If they had opened up either of our stomachs that night, they probably would have found a combined forty-seven olives, and maybe a chewed-up license plate. Fortunately we had just as many rounds of onion rings which seemed to have magically absorbed all the alcohol. It was like it was such a bad combination -- gin and onion rings -- that they cancelled each other out somehow. But I guess if you think about anything being digested in your stomach, it seems strange.       Churches, churches, and more churches. When will people realize that god doesn’t exist? If he does... what a sicko. I was absolutely speeding off of a quadruple shot of espresso the morning after the gin and onion rings, and we stopped in one of these old, old churches to try to calm down a little bit. We met the priest, if that’s what they’re called, and I couldn’t help wonder all the horrible and treacherous things he had done. He was a person, after all. Temptation, am I right? Gets you every time. I put some money in the donation box but it was Canadian money, leftover from that trip, which I thought was a perfect gesture. How often had the church sold the weak and weary a false bill of goods? The greedy bastards would probably go down to the bank and get it changed over anyway. Assholes.      Next we drove 217 kilometers (kilos... temptation!) to the next place we were staying, some old hotel (found on BUNK), and the roads were so narrow that we kept grabbing each other’s thighs out of nervousness and we got into arguments about this and that, arguments with very deep roots, and I think we both started thinking about separating as soon as we got home. This had to have been part of the allure of the ball gag, when you think about it... hurting... wanting to be hurt. It’s always about power. I used to think power wasn’t a real thing but now I think it’s all there is.       The muffins at the hotel... my god! Life changing! We must have eaten about a dozen. People looked at us like street urchins who hadn’t had a decent meal, or at least a decent muffin, in forever. This hotel was in one of the old cities, and okay, I don’t believe in god, but maybe karma is real, and when we went out I would take a muffin in my pocket and let it get all warm and crumbly and then I would feed it to some ducks. Some lucky ducks. This at least made us feel like good people. We took the requisite pictures of buildings and Dickensian characters around and we propositioned one old ninny to go back to our room with us for a ride on the Love Boat. The woman just stuck a crooked little pinky up, I think in a reference to manhood, and I frowned.       In the back of our minds the whole time was the faucet back home. Problems you leave behind are ones you’ll always have to pick back up later. And what would happen after the faucet? Would the fridge go on the fritz? Would the dryer legitimately start eating our socks? What right had we to any of these things anyway? Who could raise a child in this world, when the village was full of drunken derelicts and not much else? What the fuck is the point, really. It’s all such a fucking struggle. Okay, thanks for reading about our wonderful trip! And many more to come!                                                                                                              Best

[niall-is-my-dream]

The Bucket List - Chapter Thirteen

You made your way around the supermarket Sunday morning picking up everything you needed for the bbq that lunchtime. You checked your list and realising you were done you made your way to the check out. You packed up everything and paid before loading it into the back of your car.

It took two trips from your car to your apartment to carry everything. Your mind swimming with thoughts of Niall. You'd not seen him in over ten days,

 and yet you knew he was in this building now sleeping off his jetlag in his own apartment 3 floors below yours.

You started to unpack all the shopping, switching on your music to listen to whilst you sorted stuff. Your Pops had come over the day before to help you build the bbq and brought you over the gas cylinder you needed. As much as you wanted to build it yourself, your Pops had insisted and to be honest it was a 2 person job.

Michael and Claire were first to arrive just before 12. They'd been to the pub to see your Mam and Pops that morning and had left with a cheesecake for you all that your Mam had made. They were both grinning from ear to ear. 

"Annie we have some news." Michael said. "You're going to be an Auntie! We are having a baby!"

"Oh my God!" You screamed and jumped up and down before hugging them both. "This is so exciting! How far along are you? This would explain the no drinking last week in the pub!"

"We are 12 weeks, we wanted to wait till we had been to our scan before saying anything." Claire said, as she produced a fuzzy scan picture from her bag. "This is a copy for you if you want it?"

"Course I want it! I'm the proud Auntie! I'm going to spoil this little bean so much! Can I tell the others today? When are you due?" You said bouncing up and down on your heels.

"Yeah of course, Its due January 2nd." Michael said.

"Could arrive early for Christmas! What did Mam and Pops say?"

"Oh Jesus Christ Mam was excited!! She was in tears! Pops was almost welling up to!" Michael replied.

You heard the doorbell go and went to answer it still clutching the scan picture in your hand. It was Katie, Willie, Deo and Martin.

"Guess what?" You asked jumping up and down as you invited them in.

"What?" Said katie.

You showed them the picture of the scan, "I'm going to be an Auntie!"

"Jesus feckin Christ thought Niall had knocked you up or something for a second then!" Said Deo. "Feel like I should give these flowers to Claire not you."

"Ha! She can have some when she has the baby!"

"Then these are for you my love!" He said as he gave you a hug. "Me mother always said you should take a gift for the hostess of the party." 

Everyone gathered in the kitchen hugging Michael and Claire whilst you got everyone a drink.

"Can I be the bbq king today?" Willie asked. 

"Yes please mate, that would be great." You replied. "I'm not sure what time Niall is arriving but I thought we'd eat about 1-1:30 if that's ok with everyone?"

"He woke up just as we left and was sorting some washing out. Think he was just going to shower and get his stuff ready to come here. Don't think he will be long." Willie said.

You smiled. You couldn't wait to see him.

Everyone spilled out on the balcony. It led off the kitchen diner and was a massive space, you'd got an 8 seater wicker dining table and chairs, an umbrella and an area in the corner for the bbq. You put the flowers from Deo in a vase and started chopping some cherry tomatoes for the salad. Deo was busy making a playlist when the doorbell went. Your heart started to race, that had to be Niall. "I'll get it" Deo said as he could see you were busy.

"Thanks." You replied, as you walked over to the sink to wash your hands.

After a minute Deo came strolling back into the lounge with Niall behind him. He looked gorgeous, fuck you'd missed him. You couldn't wait to kiss him. You smiled when you saw him and he smiled back that cheeky grin across his face. 

"Hi." He said, as he wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you close and snuggling into your neck. 

"Hi yourself." You said snuggling into him, wrapping your arms around his neck and stroking your fingers through his hair. You sighed as you breathed in that amazing scent of coconut, it engulfing you completely.

He pulled away and faced you reaching down to kiss you gently, your lips meeting his. Jesus you'd missed this. His kiss was gentle at first but you tell he was hungry for you, his tongue was teasing yours. He pulled you closer, holding onto your bum and he continued to kiss you making up for lost time. Your hands were running through his hair making the kiss deeper. He gripped onto your hips pushing himself against you.

"Dear God put her down Niall, you've not been gone that long!" Deo laughed.

Niall pulled away and turned to him. "Fuck off!" He said laughing. "Close your eyes if you don't like it!"

Deo laughed and walked out onto the balcony leaving you and Niall alone.

You were laughing to. "Missed you." He whispered staring straight at you. 

"Mmm missed you to." You replied kissing him again. "Did you sleep ok?" You asked him as you pulled away.

"Sort of, couldn't wait any longer to see you. I'll try not to be grumpy whilst I get over it."

"Yeah, I don't want a grumpy Niall." You said laughing. "Come on I've got the food to finish. You get a drink and say hi to everyone outside. Michael and Claire are here to. They told me earlier that they going to have a baby. I'm so excited for them!" 

"Wow that's great news, I'll go congratulate them." He said as he grabbed a beer from the fridge. "You need a drink babe?"

"Yeah, could you top up my wine please?" You asked. "Oh and ask Willie to light the bbq please?"

"Oh no, he's not doing the bbq, I'm the bbq king today, he's on my turf!" He said as he refilled your glass.

"Your turf??!!!" You asked giggling.

"Yeah!" He replied with a wink as he went outside.

Willie and Niall shared bbq duties, not sure why they were so bothered about it, fucking men arguing over a bbq but you liked that Niall got protective over it thinking it was his as it was in your apartment. You'd only been seeing each other a few weeks but when he was in the UK he spent all his time with you at yours. You were glad he felt comfortable here.

He had helped clear up after everyone had eaten, loading the dishwasher and putting the remaining food in pots for the fridge. He moved around your kitchen like it was his and you liked that. You grabbed some drinks from the fridge taking them out to everyone on the balcony. You came back in with some empty bottles to find Niall wiping down the kitchen counters. 

"You keep that up babe and I'm going to keep you!" You said laughing.

"I thought you were going to keep me anyway!" He said smirking while trying to look offended.

"Wasn't sure to be honest!" You said smiling.

He came over to you and placed his hands on your hips. 

"How about we disappear for a while and I'll show you how much I've missed you." He whispered in your ear. You ran your fingers up and down his back a low growl escaped his lips. 

"So impatient Niall, but I don't want to be disturbed by anyone and I certainly don't want to be leaving that bedroom for at least 24 hours once I get you in there." You whispered back.

"Jesus Annie, I've missed you so much." He said as he leaned down and kissed you. "Can we make everyone go home now?!"

"No we can't! You'll just have to wait!" 

Chapter  Fourteen

https://niall-is-my-dream.tumblr.com/post/168426297208/the-bucket-list-chapter-fourteen

[sunnysidewrites]

Wolf!Wonwoo

Requested by anon: The Wonwoo fic and Taeyang fic are so freaking cute and they are so well written too omg! Please write more fics for the both of them as they're my favourites (: Wolf!au? Thank you ((((:

Requested by anon: Wolf!au for wonwoo or woozi! Thank you and I love your works!!

so i got the same au request i hope both of these suited your taste! LIKE I SAID I HAVE OVERWHELMING FEELS FOR WONWOO SO THIS IS PROBABLY LIKE THE LONGEST HEADCANON I’VE EVER WRITTEN THIS IS SUPER LONG OMG BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOY EVERYONE!!!! BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE WONWOO IMAGINES :)))) if you weren’t satisfied please send me another request!

oKAY NO LIE I WAS LITERALLY THINKING ABOUT THIS LAST NIGHT

I was lying in bed and was just like “hm you know wonwoo really resembles a wolf????”

aND THE NEXT THING I KNOW I HAVE 2 REQUESTS ABOUT THIS AU LMAO

I love jeon wonwoo anyways

You lived near a very dense forest with your grandpa

Since it was a small town, there could only be so many things that could happen before word travels

Ofc nothing ever happens in your small town the most eventful thing was when the local market ran out of your favorite potato chips like honEST TO GOD

But as of late there’s been more signs of wildlife in the forest and everyone is lowkey freaking out like what is this we haven’t even had livestock in 80+ years????

Thanks to the dense forest there’s been showing a steadily increase in deer population yay!!!! But also what!!!!

With deer ofc comes…………

Wolves

Packs and packs of them

You’re worried for your life what if a wolf is gonna attack you one day since you’re right next to their habitat!!!!!

Your grandpa is just like lmao y/n chill i was a hunter back in the days we’ll be fine

It was a chillier day than usual in the winter and temperatures were dramatically dropping

You were tired of being cooped up in the small little house so you were just roaming around in front of your porch and playing with the fluffy snow

You smol child were too busy cutely hopping around to notice a wolf lurking behind the trees oH SNAP

It wasn’t until it got a little closer that you felt a strange presence and you know that eery feeling in the horror movies where it’s like …..i feel like someone is there…..

You immediately stopped and cautiously looked around you

You would have missed it if you weren’t so keen about your surroundings bc the wolf so easily blended in with the forest and snow

yOU WERE GONNA SCREAM BUT dude they can probably smell fear that’s not your best choice here

your heart leapt in your throat so you couldn’t have screamed even if you wanted to (you did)

Gdi your grandpa was out running errands and he left like half an hour ago so you’re kinda screwed!!!

The wolf looked so,,, ethereal and majestic with its mix of black, gray, and white fur and it was still pretty young

It looked more like a wild husky so beautiful i love dogs

But you obviously didn’t have time to soak in their beauty you were about to get eaten for pete’s sake

You were very very very slowly backing away from it your door was only a few steps away

buT IT KEPT INCHING TOWARDS YOU LIKE PLS LEAVE ME ALONE ALL YOU WANTED WAS TO MAKE A SNOWMAN (it doesn’t have to be a snowman im sorry that joke is old)

You decided that maybe since this winter was harsher than normal it was hard finding food

So once your back hit the wall yOU SLAMMED & LOCKED THAT SHIT

You rummaged through your fridge to see if you could find absolutely anything for the wolf to leave you tf alone

“Aha!” you grabbed a piece of red meat and cut up a fourth of it into smaller chunks

You were pretty damn smart like we’re talking about how a pre teen be doing all of this

You brought your cutting board to your window and sure enough the wolf was still outside your house yiKES

You cautiously opened your window and you could see the little ears perking up

You threw the pieces as far as it could reach the wolf in the hopes of him leaving once he’s gathered his meal

At first the wolf jumped back in surprise like ??? what’s this human doing?????

After a few minutes of inspecting the meat the wolf cautiously approached the makeshift meal and started to gobble all of it in seconds flat

You’re just like,,,,,,,,,,,,,, that could have been me oh my god,,,,,,,,,,

After it finished eating it looks back up to you and even from afar you can see gratitude and hints of,,,, sorrow??? in its eyes

It turns back to the forest and disappears as fast as it came

All your little body can do is slump against the door clutching your beating heart like i WAS GONNA DIE TODAY

You thought that would be the last time you were gonna encounter a wolf but there wouldn’t be a plot then lmao

You managed to prevent any more wolf encounters as you grew up and by the time you hit 20 you have been successful

But all good things must come to an end

You decided to go to a college nearby to still help take care of your aging gramps but the school isn’t all half bad it’s pretty decent so good for you reader!!

It was now winter break aka the longest school holiday your college granted you with so you decided to return home and spend some Quality Time with your grandpa

Your grandpa’s health has been declining more apparently than ever

One time you had to rush him to the hospital because he fell unconscious and you were trying so hard not to tear up and be strong the whole time

You stayed overnight at the hospital despite the nurse insisting you return home but you just camped outside the hospital room and slept there

You woke up to a random blanket on you and you figured it was just a nurse who knew better than to convince you

Your grandpa quickly recovered in a matter of days go gramps

When he was finally discharged and you were approaching the front desk about the bill they were like “oh it’s already been paid for”

“What that’s strange I didn’t even get the bill yet”

“Someone walked in last night and said they’ll take care of it for you miss”

You thank her and walk away in confusion like,,,, ofc you’re grateful that you didn’t have to pay but who on earth would do that?????

One day you wanna explore the forest because i mean you lived next to it for basically almost your entire life and you don’t even know what it looks like!

Ofc your grandpa is like do you wanna get killed child um

“Pls gramps I lived my whole life being terrified of that forest and now that I’m older I kinda want to see what it looks like,,,, I’ll stay close enough to have the house in my view!”

“sigh,,,, well you’re an adult now I trust that you can make decisions for yourself so,,,, fine”

So off you go to your death exploring

You’re amazed by how enchanting the forest looks like from within, nothing like what you see from your house

The snow only adds more of a magical sense

There’s a small pond and some bushes where you guess is the deer’s habitat but they probably left to find a warmer spot

You push yourself to discover more about the forest so you inch just a litttttle farther

You see a bridge and think ????? did someone live here or something why is there a bridge?????

And being the curious cat you are you crossed it only to see aNOTHER HOUSE LIKE UM WHO THE

you hear some muffled talking and you’re just likE OH CRAP I GOTTA SCRAM so you hide behind a fairly big trunk just in time before some faces are in your view

You see a group of men around the same age as you and at first they seem to be normal but what’s normal about living in the middle of the woods????

You carefully eye each of them, and you mentally do a headcount of 13

One of them immediately catches your eye and you can’t help but feel a sense of familiarity

He’s wearing a gray turtleneck and black skinny jeans with a gray winter coAT SLJDKFLJDSFLJFDSLJFDLJDFSJDSF I LOVE WONWOO THE MODEL

He seems to be aware of you and he’s like @ the group

“Guys… do you sense someone here?”

And you’re like oH NO MY COVER IS BLOWN ABOR T M I SS ION

And the guys are like eh wonwoo you’re probably being a little paranoid

“Wonwoo it’s been years just let it GO!!!” (what’s up with all of these frozen puns this is unintentional i sTG!!!!) “the last time you said this it was just a rabbit!”

And you’re like ???? what do they mean by that buT I GOTTA JET

You wait for them to enter the house and wonwoo is the last one

He scans the area one more time and does a little head shake before heading inside

you can’t help but feel a tug in your heart because he just looked so disheartened and dejected

And he sWEARS he could have smelled your scent but maybe it was his brain tricking him like it did all these years :(((

Who hURT MY EMO SON wait you did indirectly lmao

You get tf out of there like “i aint trying to die again bye yall”

You’re scrambling to get out of there and when you reach the house your gramps is like so how did it go

“uM I HAVE HOMEWORK TO DO BYE”

Gramps: but??? it’s ,,,, break,,,,,,

You contemplate about what just happened back there

You: i shouldn’t go back i got lucky and didn’t get eaten alive

Also you: but i need to find out more ok it’s settled I will return

Soon enough you found yourself visiting the same place every day and now wonwoo is rEALLY on edge

“gUYS DON’T YOU SENSE IT WHAT THE HECK”

“wonwoo…….. We acknowledge your senses are the better ones out of us but…… you need to let her go”

You’re like omg what??? Her??? Who’s her?????

“You know I can’t do that…… she fed me -- hey wait a minute, is that someone over there?”

OOOHH FUCKKKKK

You’re like oH WELL FUCK MY LIFE

They whirl around to where his finger is pointing and they’re like hmm wait he’s right it looks like someone’s shadow

“COME OUT WHOEVER YOU ARE”

And you’re scared to literally freaking death bc you are not trying to get yourself killed but i mean you kinda had to see it coming tho

So you do what a reasonable person would

RUN

“hEY WHO ARE YOU”

But you just keep running and you eventually get lost in the forest and you’re like oh my god pLS NOT NOW

You’re desperately trying to reroute but you’re pretty sure you passed by that same stump six times

You try to calm down like ok look it’s still probably around noon and the sun is still out you still have time

That is until you hear a crunch of a leaf

And you’re like oH MY GOD NOW WHAT

You turn around to see you’re surrounded by dark black wolves

This is it this is where you die

And you’re trying to find an escape but you’re practically cornered

“Please….. Go find something else to devour……. I swear I am not tasty at all…………… I’m all bones you wouldn’t want that right aHAHA………...”

One of them inches closer to you and you can guess it’s probably the alpha male since it seems to be the biggest

And you’re like welp i lived a good life IM S ORRY GRAMPS YOU WERE RIGHT

You’re in the middle of having a mental breakdown when the alpha suddenly bares his teeth and you know it’s gonna go down

Just as it’s about to leap on you, you see another blurry figure slAMMING INTO THE ALPHA

A full on wolf battle is going on right in front of you

Not only did that wolf come but his entire pack did so it’s pack vs pack

And some black wolves are still trying to get @ you ;))) to devour you ;)))

I gotta go

But obv the other pack is like dON’T TOUCH HER and you’re super confused bc 

Well there’s obviously more than one thing to be confused about but your main concern is why am I not getting eaten??????

You can’t help but notice the one who rammed his body in your attacker has very,,,, familiar looking fur,,,,,,

And you’re like oMG NO,,,, NO IT CAN’T BE HOW

Since the wolf brawl has temporarily taken the focus off of you, you’re like ok this is my chance 2 escape

You don’t get too far like probably 15 feet when you’re feeling really lightheaded and nauseous

You stumble upon a tree and try to steady yourself but the events took a huge toll on you and so you collapse

Right before you do you feel someone’s arms holding your waist up and some yelling

“I… finally…. found you….” you hear someone whisper in your ear before you really blackout

By the time you regain consciousness the sun is about to set

You’re stirring around in a foreign bed and you’re like wait,,,, hold on,,,,,

Your eyes slowly adjust to the dim light and the strange room

You’re fully awake now and start panicking like where am i???? Am i gonna die?????

You see someone’s head on the edge of the bed and you’re like WHO THE

“oH GOODNESS” your little outburst woke him up

He groggily yawns and rubs his eyes “oh great you’re awake!!!!!11!!11”

You just stare at him in 34384682 emotions welling inside of you like pls do not hurt me i just want 2 go hOmE!!!

He starts to introduce himself as Wonwoo but who cARES YOU JUST WANNA GO HOME

“Ok Wonwoo i have no idea who you are or where I am but I need to leave before I’m actually gonna get killed by my grandpa I appreciate you letting me stay here for the time being but I gotta go now thanks i guess??? bye”

And you’re trying to keep your cool and escape as fast as you can but he’s right on your heels

He is nOT gonna let you leave so easily after spending the past decade thinking about you

You reach the outside of the house and you realize,,,, hey it’s the house i saw earlier,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

He eventually reaches you and pulls you around by the arm and you almost gasp when you see the intense look he has in his eyes

“I,,, can’t let you leave just yet”

“Please i’m sorry for snooping earlier!!! Please let m eg o I swear to keep my distance!!!!”

“tHAT’S THE THING I DON’T WANT YOU TO KEEP YOUR DISTANCE”

You: what

Him: what

“What…. did you say?”

“Don’t you remember me? You fed me”

And you’re like ?????????? ?? ???????  what is this guy on

“Uh… Wonwoo, was it? I think you have the wrong person; I don’t know what you’re--”

And it hits you

That day you thought you were gonna die

You look at him completely baffled like how is that even possible???? That was,,,, a wolf

Your breath is hitching you’re gonna faint again that means he was the same one who saved you from being eaten

“I know it’s hard to believe but that was me!!!!! Food was extremely difficult to find at that time and when I saw you…. Well, i was hoping you would be willing to spare me something”

My heart poor little wonu was gonna starve to death if it weren’t for you

“But…. but how….”

“Ah…. well that’s a story for later but the important thing is I was eternally grateful to you and I was determined to find you again,,,, I wanted to return the favor for saving me. Who do you think paid off your grandpa’s medical bills? I hope that blanket was warm enough for you”

YOU’RE FLIPPING OUT LIKE HOW DID HE

Turns out he’s been watching you from afar as his human form as your little guardian angel (or stalker…. tbh) im crying

“You were thankful just for some pieces of meat I gave out?”

“It wasn’t just some meat. You saved me from dying! I hadn’t had any food in my system for a week. I’ve helped your grandpa plenty of times at the market before. I also purchased those textbooks you needed for that math class”

“Wait but my friend gave those to me?”

“Yeah well that’s what I told her to say to you LOL”

gdi your friend was probably geeking out about how good looking he was

And you’re just trying to process this but it’s overwhelming to say the least

“You… you did all of that for me???”

And he’s like ofc!!! :DDD you deserve everything and more!!!!

And you’re like oH MY GOD DID I JUST DIE AND SEE AN ANGEL

“What about that pack from earlier?”

“That’s our rival pack,,,,, I’m so sorry you had to get caught up in our rivalry but good thing I got there in time. I told the others to help protect you”

And you start tearing up because of how gracious and humble and caring he is and he’s like oh nononono and starts to freak out and hugs you

You’re gonna bAWL why is this guy so nice to you he’s even rubbing circles on your back to help calm you down

“I’m not asking much of you…. but can we try getting to properly know each other? You were the only single person to not judge me in my wolf form,,,,, everyone else would throw sticks and stones :(((“ (words do indeed hurt you tho) “and i’m also grateful that you were able to accept me even as a creature that you feared”

you take a moment to breathe and eventually accept bc even tho this is all so sudden and foreign you can just tell he has a heart of gold and doesn’t wanna hurt you

Ofc your gramps throws a fit when you get home and he’s like wHY IS THIS GUY WITH YOU

After a long long talk things are settled and your gramps is like ok fine you can date her or whatever but one wrong move and your head is gonna be hanged here

“gRANDPA WE’RE NOT DATING (yet)!!!!”

“I’m just saying i got my eye on you boy”

You spend the rest of your break getting to really know Wonwoo and try to overlook his,,, alter ego thing,,,, as best as you can

You’re outside making snowmen and snow angels and just being so carefree about everything

You somehow end up in a snowball fight with wonwoo and he’s like ur going down!!11!!

You’re hiding behind a tree and peek out to find him but when all of a sudden someone ambushes you from behind

“I GOT YOU” he screams in your ear while you’re laughing and trying to wiggle out of his arms

You guys stumble and fall with him on top of you oHMYGOHDGHLGDS

Your laughter dies down a little and all you can think about is how close your faces are

He softly smiles at you and leans down to give you your firST KISS IM SCREAMING

“HEY KIDS WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING”

“gRANDPA STOP”