#hopefully all of those links work let me know if they don't for some reason

[lilangeldeath]

Manifestation tip #1

"if I can pause you, I can turn you off" - using your commanding power to harness your anger/frustration and start kicking Wavering in the face until it runs away crying

A little storytime. Once I was in the middle of a task i needed to finish before bed, and was trying to hurry it along because I was tired. I began having deep wavering feelings and felt like my entire manifestation was falling off the rails even though the entire day i had been experiencing lots of movement. I, with my inner voice, got frustrated and for some reason the first thing that popped up in my head was imagining the Wavering as it's own character, i'm sure you can tell what that sounds like. it's all very interesting to me, the links between so many religions, always has been.

Anyhow, if it's helpful, give your wavering a name or a "character"/persona, hopefully one you're not fond of. or if that's too extra for you, just try imagining those thoughts in the voice of someone you think is a giant, annoying asshole. it immediately makes you go "wait a damn minute, shut the fuck up!!"

the other thing that popped up in my head when i imagined the Wavering as a sort of asshole character was saying "wait! hold on! let me finish this first. pause. time out. if you're gonna test me, at least test me on a level playing field when i'm not in the middle of something." yes, i am an extreme yapper, even in my own thoughts lmao. and then right after that thought was over, i realized how silly it was.

i said inwardly "if i can pause you, i can turn you off. i can get rid of you." and called my power back to myself. it feels good to laugh at yourself now and then and i think that's really important during all of this. yes, you should want to take your creations seriously and not be lazy and expect good results, but taking them seriously in my opinion also has to have its silly moments. it's just the way life is, really. forrest gump, box of chocolates, you know the deal. sometimes even when you're manifesting really serious stuff, you have to be able to laugh at yourself.

you really can turn the wavering off whenever you feel like it, if you allow yourself to feel the strength and the power of commanding. don't be afraid to command the universe, your subconscious, whatever you want to think it comes from. not in an evil way like "oh i get to control everybody" but in a way that you refuse to let anyone, or anything, including your own ingrained negative beliefs, take your power away from you, the real you, the 4D you/soul

our bodies are just mech suits we use as the creator observing and experiencing itself, experiencing a new method of creation. if you feel drawn to do it, take your wavering by the horns and tell it to shut the fuck up. if it helps, beat the shit out of it mentally. not beating yourself up, that just compounds it. not like "oh i had a negative thought, i'm so bad at this". like "i command all negative thought patterns to leave my subconscious forever. i am a creator/manifester and i am so grateful to wield such power." things like that.

if you work on your self concept (in whatever way that feels best to you) enough that you really feel that power, that fire inside, you will really start locking in. you have to ASSUME the ROLE of being in charge around here (your reality). i'm the type of person that my anger management issues in the past used to make me isolate and be bitter towards others or lash out at them to push them away. now i funnel my anger into a sword that i use to cut off quantum timelines i do not wish to experience. that's how i personally see it.

[letomills]

Recategorizers and unhiders for clothing from the University EP: • the recategorizers enable young adult clothes for adults + you'll also have clothing category options for some of them; • the unhiders will reveal University clothing and hats that are already enabled for adults/elders but hidden in CAS.

They come as unmerged files so you can pick & choose. This matters if you want to use default replacements for some of this stuff, as some default replacements are not compatible with recategorizers (see the note on compatibility at the bottom of the post). If you would prefer a merged version, check out this MTS post by Windkeeper.

Download links & further details under the cut.

Recategorizers

They will affect these clothes and their recolors:

All will be available for adults as well as young adults. For some of them you'll have to choose between 2 categorization options (e.g. ymbodypajamasboxers can stay underwear-only or be enabled for sleepwear as well). Hopefully the file names are clear enough.

I did not include the University clothes that Maxis duplicated and gave to adults with the Nightlife EP (like ymbodyturtleneckmod / ambodyturtleneckmodep2 or yfbodyhipmicrominiskirt / afbodyhipmicrominiskirtep2).

Some of the recolors are pinned to University, some are pinned to the Base Game, I just left it how Maxis did it (the ones pinned to BG are basically age conversions of BG teen clothes).

The game has them all enabled for townies except the togas, yfbodyblazerpants, ymtopcrazybody and ymbodyshorts for some reason. I didn't edit that except to disable townie spawn on separates in their versions that are enabled for categories other than everyday. That's because I'm not too sure about the ability of the game to assign non-everyday separates properly (I've seen townies get assigned, for example, an athletic top with a nude bottom as their athleticwear) so I'd rather be on the safe side. Reminder that to be able to select separates in categories other than everyday, you need LazyDuchess's Separates4all mod.

↳ Download recategorizers: SFS / Mega

Btw the ymbodytoga recategorizer includes the recolors with tank tops under the toga, I don't think they're actually used in game (edit: nvm they are used during toga parties) but there were property sets for them so here you go.

~

Unhiders

These will be made available in CAS:

They're all disabled for townies, categorized as everyday. You can find the mascot hats in the unnatural bin:

↳ Download unhiders: SFS / Mega

~

Note on compatibility with default replacements

[The short of it is, recategorizers & unhiders conflict with default replacements that already contain Property Sets, which you can check for in simPE.]

Each CAS item recolor has 1 associated Property Set. Recategorizers & unhiders are edited Property Sets. Some default replacements also contain Property Sets. Those default replacements will therefore conflict with recategorizers and unhiders.

Texture-only and mesh-only default replacements generally do not contain Property Sets and are therefore compatible. Default replacements that replace both mesh and textures frequently do include Property Sets. When that's the case, using a separate recategorizer or unhider alongside the default replacement won't work. If you want to change the clothing category of your default replacement, you need to open it in simPE and edit its Property Set directly (the "category" value specifically). To learn how to do it, see this guide by AlmightyHat.

~

As you can probably tell from the previews, I used the sims 2 default database as reference. Hopefully I didn't forget anything, let me know if I did.

[recoord]

More thoughts on supporting GO S3

I will always be grateful to GO for giving me comfort in troubling times, but now I find it difficult to support a new season of the series that mainly benefits an alleged perpetrator.

Five credible sexual assault allegations against Neil Gaiman and he's still capable of successfuly releasing another project under his name. Season 3 being released helps him to keep his status as a lucrative creator in the entertainment industry and this helps him to conserve the power that has allowed him to get away with it for so long. His PR team has been making a great work burying the news about the allegations and sadly people hyping Good Omens season 3, without mentioning the allegations, inadvertendly helped on this as well.

However, my opinion will not determine the future of the season. We could assume that Amazon has already invested a lot in the production to just abandon it, so the second best thing would be to ask Amazon to fire Gaiman, he could secretly keep working on the series and the scripts were mainly written by him (the actors and everyone involved will voice Gaiman's words, ugh), and the series will be promoted undeniably mentioning him as one of the creators (I'm sorry for the victims having to hear people praising his name everywhere once again :c), but luckily the news about the allegations would also spread further, more people would come to know about the dangers of Gaiman's predatory behaviour and he would see some consequences.

I still think that cancelling the season would be the best case scenario, but firing him resoundingly and making the reasons for his dismissal heard far and wide might be a reasonable middle ground.

This is just my opinion, but I understand that at the end of the day it's an individual decision whether or not to support the third season.

I'm just going to ask everyone to please reflect on the power Gaiman gains from the projects that are released under his name (not just financially).

Thanks to everyone who has spoken up about the SA accusations even if it hurt to learn that someone who helped create such beloved stories ended up doing so much damage as well.

Here there is a great post that presents actions that fans can take in support of firing Gaiman, still having Season 3, and not ignoring that the allegations exist.

(Petitions, extra steps, etc.)

Thanks a lot to the creator of the card!

Update:

It has been confirmed that both Gaiman and his own production company are out of the project, thanks to everyone who supported his dismissal! [Erratum below]

The changes made for the GO final serve as a message to the creators and everyone abusing of their power:

If you harm people, it will not be without consequences for you and the things you profit from financially and professionally.

Power to the victims. They were brave enough to share their stories. You will never be forgotten.

Scarlett, K, Claire, Caroline, Julia, Courtnee...

Still sceptical about supporting the victims? I recommend reading:

Staying neutral until Neil Gaiman is convicted by the courts?

Falling Safes (I very much recommend reading this one)

Here there is a great summary of the available sources (Podcasts links, transcripts, etc.): Credits for the round up to Muccamukk.

Thank you to all those who continue to speak out about the allegations and do not let the voices of the victims fall into oblivion.

Update 2:

Erratum

The situation about the current business relationship between Gaiman and Amazon has more specific and complex details better detailed in the image below (credits and thanks to the author of the post).

Source

[kiwi-luminaryofthestars]

Chapter 4 is up!!

Was gonna say I had no idea how to link this chapter on tumblr but look at me, I figured it out! Chapter 4 is up, if you so dare to read this absolute monster of a fucking chapter. It took me like two hours to just do another once-over before I posted it, holy shit.

And there's art at the bottom!! Super cool!! (DON’T SKIP TO THE BOTTOM OF THE CHAPTER FOR THE ART, YOU WILL GET SPOILED; I AM SO SORRY PERSON WHO COMMENTED 😭😭)

Some behind the scenes stuff I thought might be cool to include here, if that's something that interests you. Moreso for my benefit, I suppose, but there's a read more because it's spoilers:

The discussion between Rantaro and Kokichi was one of the first conversations I fully drafted out for this fic when I started outlining. It has changed somewhat as the outline was fleshed out, but the big pieces have always been the same, so if that tells you its importance, I don’t know what else does lol. I actually have all of the Rantaro conversations already drafted out (though there are technically only two more super important ones). I hope his role is as interesting to you as I think it is. 

One of the reasons I struggled so endlessly with writing this last section is because I initially did just have Kyoko and Shuichi sitting down for a normal interview. I scrapped that idea near immediately because it just felt so boring (glad I did). I also scrapped another idea that I won’t divulge quite yet because I think I may still use it in a later chapter. 

The lovely @psaiouma was so kind as to lend me a copy of a DICE zine that I realized, after drafting out some of the first section, I accidentally copied a little bit. And I thought I was so clever making it so they didn’t actually know what their acronym was lol. So I tried to keep the acronyms away from what was used in the first fic in that zine, though I could only go so far (that acronym is ridiculous, dammit Kokichi!) 

I know it’s typical to give Kokichi the chess-move-type metaphors, but I thought it would be interesting to let Shuichi take a lot of his inspiration from Kokichi in this chapter and, thus, feel as if he’s playing chess with the various people he has to trick. Clearly, he’s not as good at it as Kokichi, lol, but hopefully that wasn’t so jarring to read.

Aaaand yeah, I'm taking a break for like a week lol. I have been sitting on this futon since 4:00 am finishing this and I need a shower, the sun, food, and maybe a glass of wine. Don't be like me lol

Hope everyone has a great day and this bombshell of a stupid chapter isn't unbelievably overwhelming. I appreciate those who have been so hyped about this and hope it continues to be something interesting for you to read :)

[griefsodeerly]

hey gang. We're going to take a moment here to be incredibly transparent and vulnerable with you all, as our audience.

We - us and Grimace - have been a single income household since the beginning of the year. As some of you may know, we left our full time job in January because it was making us actively suicidal, and we agreed it would be best for our health and safety to stop. We did that with the idea that we would take time, recover, and make up the income difference with commission work and, hopefully, streaming.

That hasn't panned out, due to me instead spending the last seven months being a burnt out husk and barely touching our tablet pen, save for the deerfest sketches, and now we're really struggling.

On top of our rent, payments for the cats, bills, gas, food, and everything we already pay, right now we're staring down the barrel of an additional $1500 in bills due by next week. We're trying to figure out our plan to make it work, but we don't have anything concrete yet, and the stress has been crushing both Grimace and us.

We're making this post not to beg for sympathy, and we know how hard it is out there for money for all of us right now. We're posting this so you all have an explanation for why streams have been sporadic, why we've suddenly canceled streams for little reason, and what's going on behind the scenes.

Some days, this all makes it hard to put on the show we feel you all deserve, and we'd rather give you those than a stream where we're barely holding ourselves together.

Thank you all for your patience with us. We don't have anything to offer in return - we owe far too much art to offer that - but if you wanted to throw a few dollars at us, paypal and ko-fi are the best and quickest methods to do so, along with donations through our stream link.

We'll be back tomorrow. Today, we're going to try and buckle in to get as much owed art done as we can.

[eloise175]

Profile and Masterlist info ^^

𖤐 ̊⁎+˳✧༺ Welcome to my blog! ༻𖤐 ̊⁎+˳✧

Who am I and what do I do?

I go by El for short (most used), Eloise, or even Eli if that’s what you’d prefer (though not very used); she/her prononouns.

Mostly a VADTD-centric blog. My main focus most of the time are Callisto and Penelope, I love them so so much and have made it a mission to yap about them constantly <3

I post lots of my personal headcanons, AUs, memes and even episode/character/series analyses. Novel reader so beware of spoilers, there are plenty on my page!!

I'm a VADTD fanfic writer and artist, tho I rarely post my art. You can find my fanfics on Ao3 (I'll link my profile down below) ^^

➠ Callisto and/or Penelope haters DNI with me or my posts, you will be blocked. Yes, I will block even if see random hate for no reason—most of all misinformation.

What fandoms am I in—manhwas/webtoons I've read?

(These are obviously not all of them, but mostly the main ones);

Villains Are Destined to Die (VADTD/VADD) — my longtime favorite and hyperfixation

Genshin Impact: EU sever; AR 60; Yelan main

Honkai Star Rail (HSR): EU server; TL 67; Acheron main

Sailor Moon — mostly SM Crystal

How to Win My Husband Over — quickly became one of my favorites, may or may not be because I have a thing for men with red eyes (what can I say I’m a woman of culture)

The Siren: Becoming the Villain's Family

A Business Proposal — comfort manhwa, I watched and enjoyed the kdrama too but the manhwa is pure greatness and I will die on this hill

Daytime Star — comfort manhwa yet again, it’s sooo cute

Positively Yours — comfort manhwa pt.3 :))

Unholy Blood — another one of my longtime favs, Euntae and Hayan my beloved <3

Where can you find me?

I have pages on a few other socials, and I'm usually pretty active except stated otherwise. All of my profiles are still very much dedicated to VADTD or underwent changes to conform:

Read my fanfics on Ao3 — For now I only post my fanfics on Ao3 so if you see them posted somewhere else, that is not me! Please let me know if you come across anything like that, or any sort of plagiarism of my works (yes, it has happened before, on a whole different site too *sobs*)

Eloise_175 on X/Twitter — Quite active on there lately, sometimes I post things I don't end up posting on here, like threads and whatnot

VADTD Discord server — I tend to be pretty active on discord and consequently on the VADTD server too, everyone is welcomed to join! (please make sure to read the rules carefully ^^)

calliopeys_ on Instagram — I don’t really post much on there as I’m not an Instagram person, but hopefully I’ll get around to posting more on there as well. Created a new account from scratch to maybe post my art and fanfic updates. If I see an influx of people from here on there, I may do some of those quick asks in the stories :))

calliopeys on TikTok — Empty for the moment, but maybe I'll do some silly memes on there

Tags Directory

(might edit this section later on)

Villains Are Destined to Die | Novel | Headcanons | Analysis | My Fanart | Memes | My Fanfics | Merch | Asks | Incorrect Quotes | Scenarios | Reblogs |

Calliope: Penelope Eckhart x Callisto Regulus

Characters:

Penelope Eckhart | Callisto Regulus | Judith Regulus |Cedric Porter | Ivonne Eckhart | Reynold Eckhart | Derrick Eckhart | Winter Verdandi | Duke Eckhart |

[municiberg]

📌intro post

Hey, welcome to my blog! My name is Cameron, but I've also gone as Sam in the past.

🦸‍♂️ 26 🦸‍♂️ they/them 🦸‍♂️ previous urls: screensllaver, deav0rs, shelectra 🦸‍♂️ main: @princeproteus 🦸‍♂️ personal carrd 🦸‍♂️ ao3 🦸‍♂️ youtube

I've ran this Incredibles blog since 2018, but I've loved the franchise since 2004! With Incredibles 3 just announced, I thought now was the right time to write a new intro post, since I'll (hopefully) be getting more active.

I like to post about theories, headcanons, and any and all general Incredibles-related thoughts. I also love getting asks with your thoughts and headcanons about the series. I'd love to talk about the Incredibles with you!

I have some playlists of Incredibles-related stuff like bonus features, deleted scenes, the scores, and other stuff, if you'd like to check those out. I also have a spreadsheet which lists the characters in the franchise, and all the various books, shorts, and video games that I could find, among other info, if you're interested in taking a peek at that! I may be neurodivergent lmao

I have a soft spot for all the characters, but my most beloveds are Voyd and the rest of the wannabes, Mirage, and especially the Deavors! I also love the glory days supers, especially Gazerbeam. I'm definitely a multishipper and Hevelyn, Wingazer/Winsterbeam, and Evelage are some of my faves. I don't have a problem with most ships unless they're incest or adult/minor - Winlet, Synlet, Elastigale, etc.

I haven't written Incredibles fanfic in a hot minute, but the fics I'm most proud of are:

🦸‍♂️ The Soaring Six & the Queen of Hearts: 130k words, T-rated, general (no pairings), focused on Voyd and the other wannabes as they adjust to life as supers in New Urbem. I wrote this in a fevered haze powered by the strongest hyperfixation I've ever gone through, and it's still the longest thing I've ever written and the only novel-length work I've ever finished! I know it's long and the lack of romance can be a turn-off, but if you decide to give it a shot, please let me know what you think - I'd love to hear it! 🦸‍♂️ Five times Gazerbeam didn't get the joke (plus one time he did): 12k words, T-rated, oneshot, Gazerbeam/Winston Deavor. This pairing only has a flimsy basis in canon, but I love it so so much, and this fic basically encapsulates all the reasons I'm obsessed with them. Winsterbeam you will always be famous.

I've also written several others, so feel free to check them out!

Since 2018, I've owned Incredibles Antics, a small and tight-knit community server by and for people who love the Incredibles. If you're a fan, please feel free to join us!

I've also tried to keep a tradition of hosting yearly streams to celebrate the anniversaries of I1 and I2, so please keep a lookout for links around the time of the films' release anniversaries. We typically watch the first and second movies along with assorted special features and other related fun videos. All are welcome to join!

I think that's it for now. Thanks so much for reading!

[dragon-creates]

Royally Screwed!

Read on AO3

1/2/3/4/5

Wow that was some hiatus. But we're officially back! And hopefully we'll start to update more frequently as well, but I can't be too sure because of college and (if you've been following me on twitter and tiktok) I'm also voicing Jane Doe in 'Birds Of Paradise' by Rosetta Sun on tiktok. I really recommend going to her kofi as the rest of the cast and I are doing commisions to voice your oc's! We all have a large range of voices so if you want go to the link of Rosetta's tiktok bio and go to her kofi and see which voice would best suit your oc! Besides from that, hopefully I'll be writing more too, especially with a certain sequel everyone has been waiting for 👀.

Also, the beginning of the chapter does go into detail about Pomni's past and how she was treated by Caine, it wasn't great to say the least. I don't want anyone to feel triggered to like always, I will label (1) when the flashback starts and (2) when it ends. If this is something that you're not comfortable reading, please always feel free to skip this fic.

Anyways, enjoy!

4. Anything, Anything, Anything

(1)

Pomni panted as she stared at the ground below, clutching onto her aerial silk. She didn’t know how long she had been practicing for, only that she was completely exhausted. But rehearsals weren’t over yet, she had to keep going. The ground looked so far down below her, sure she was up high but for some reason the height was giving her vertigo. She never gets vertigo.

“Pomni?” Kaufmo called up to her, placing down a pie he had for his act. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Pomni took a breath, “I’m fine Pa! Just lost my focus, that’s all.”

The clown didn’t seem to buy it, “I don’t think so kiddo, start climbing down slowly, you look exhausted.”

It was true. Her eyes were red with bags underneath, she seemed paler than normal and she was concerningly thin from what Kaufmo could see. But she didn’t want to worry him, not when there were worse things at play, “I’m fine Pa! I promise. I…”

She didn’t get to finish her sentence, her vision blurring and her head pounding with the force of an unexpected headache. Against her control, she slipped into unconscious, letting go of the silks.

“POMNI!” Kaufmo screamed, running to where she was falling. The rest of the cast gasped, halting their own practice as they raced to the collapsing jester.

She was lucky that her father was there in time, catching her in his arms before her body hit the floor. Kaufmo didn’t even want to imagine the type of damage she could have taken. “Ragatha,” he turned to the ragdoll, “Go get her some water, she’s skipping practice for the rest of the day.”

“Now, now Kaufmo,” a low voice drawled, making everyone’s skin crawl when the ringmaster floated into the tent. His eyes sharpened in on Kaufmo and the fainted jester in his arms, “I don’t believe you have the authority to make those commands.”

“Pomni fainted Caine,” Kaufmo hissed, his own tone cold and unafraid, “It takes the slightest bit of human empathy to recognise that she’s being overworked!”

Caine went still, his feet planted on the ground, unhappy with Kaufmo’s attitude. Ragatha’s lions immediately circled round the clown and jester, shielding them from the ringmaster’s unknown wrath, “She’ll be fine, she just needs to keep practising.”

“She needs rest.” Kaufmo spat, “The only reason why she fainted the way she did is because you keep working her to the bone to the point that she can’t even stand. Not to mention the fact that you’re sucking the literal life out of her every day just so you can fulfil your ‘precious’ ego! So excuse me if I find everything that comes out of your mouth to be complete horseshit!”

The clown panted, not tearing his eyes away from Caine even for a second. The next few seconds were nothing but aching silence.

Kaufmo had been used to Caine’s torment for years. The pair of dentures forced him to endure each performance no matter how much pain he was in. As long as the audience was satisfied, he couldn’t care less if the clown had a few broken bones. But Kaufmo would be damned if he was going to let the ringmaster inflict that same pain onto his daughter, not if he could help it.

The clown turned his attention away from Caine when he heard a small whine, turning to look down at Pomni fluttering her eyes open. “Pa?” she whimpered, “What happened?”

“Hey there kiddo,” he rocked her lightly, like he used to do when she was younger after she had a fright or a nightmare. “You fainted, you’re lucky I was there to catch you.” He put a hand to her forehead, wiping away a bead of sweat, “You’re burning up, come on you need to lay down.”

“I didn’t give out that order,” Caine intervened.

“And I don’t care!” Kaufmo snapped, “You’re not pushing her to the brink today Caine! Do what you want with me but leave Pomni out of this!”

“Here,” Ragatha rushed back, a cup of water nursed in her hands as she held it to Pomni’s lips. “Oh sweetheart, you look as pale as a ghost.”

Pomni gulped down as much of the liquid as she could, she didn’t realise how thirsty she was until the water hit her throat. Her head buzzed with a light ache, pressing her hand to it when she finished the water. She really had been overworked, hadn’t she?

“Easy there, kiddo,” Kaufmo raised her upper body into a sitting position, “Let’s get you back to your quarters.”

Caine cleared his throat condescendingly, “I believe I told you that I didn’t give out that order Kaufmo.”

“And I believe I told you that it was complete horseshit,” the clown retorted, not taking his eyes off Pomni as he helped her to her feet.

“I guess you need a gentle reminder,” the ringmaster spoke softly, contradicting his words with the next action he was about to do.

He flicked his hand, a red mist contrasting Pomni’s usual blue appearing. It extended like a chain, wrapping round Kaufmo’s neck and pulling the clown towards him, forcing him to drop Pomni as she landed back onto the ground with a thud. “Pa!” she cried out, the others surrounding her.

“Let me make this perfectly clear Kaufmo,” Caine hissed, the chain tightening around the clown’s neck, suffocating him. “You are under my rules, you obey me. If I say jump, you jump. If you are tied to the back of a carriage while being dragged around on a rope, you will do just that. If you had to bleed out for an act with no one to assist you, you will continue with a smile and be damn pleased about it.”

Kaufmo coughed and spluttered, pulling at the misty chain to get the smallest breath of air, but Caine was too strong.

“Caine, stop! Stop please!” Pomni screamed, the others holding her back, “Let my Pa go!”

His eyes darted to the jester, his gaze making her feel tiny. He threw Kaufmo at a box of crates, the clown grunting at the painful impact. Pomni let out a cry, her hand reaching out to him.

Caine flicked his fingers again, lifting up the others and leaving Pomni on the ground to watch in terror. “You did this, you know,” Caine tsked.

Pomni’s eyes widened with terror, “W-what?”

“They all suffer because of your incompetence,” he growled, “You’re lucky you have a bit of talent and that little magic of yours, otherwise you would be a nothing-filled waste.”

“Caine, let them go, please,” Pomni begged, her lip quivering.

He rolled his eyes, letting out a chuckle before throwing each member in different directions of the tent. Sun hit his head against a pole, Ragatha tore one of her stitches as she landed on her knives and Gangle ribbons were tied up in knots when she landed face first on the ground, putting a crack in her mask.

Pomni covered her mouth, trying to stand yet her legs give way once again. She was too weak.

“Caine, what is the meaning of this?” Moon’s startled voice echoed throughout the tent, gasping when she saw everyone scattered around and furrowed her brows when she saw Pomni’s dishevelled form on the ground. “You have to put a stop to your madness, look at what you’re doing to everyone! Look at what you’re doing to that poor girl!”

“This is merely discipline, Moon, I’m doing whatever it takes to make sure a circus is successful,” Caine muttered, barely paying her any mind.

Moon could even barely recognise the man in front of her, “What happened to you Caine?”

He turned to her slowly, “Come again?”

“What happened to the man I fell in love with?” she continued, “What happened to the promises you made to make this circus amazing? What happened to trying no matter what? What happened to the man I fell in love with?”

Caine scoffed, “I did what I had to do in order to make these dreams happen. You could never understand sacrifice Moon, you believe what you want to believe but this is the way things are.”

Moon’s eyes darkened, she started stomping towards him, “You…you vile, disgusting, monstrous-!”

He snapped his fingers, an axe appearing in his hand as he held it to her chin, daring her to come closer. “Just because I’m soft on you Moon, it doesn’t mean that I won’t take precautions for you stepping out of line,” he glared at her.

But Moon was unflinching, staring him down with the same coldness he gave her, “Do your worst.”

Caine hummed, giving her a shrug, “Fine.”

He waved his hand again, sending the axe into her shoulder. An agonised screech echoed throughout the tent as a group of his masked men rushing in and pulling her away. “You’re lucky dear, this is me sparing you,” Caine sneered, “But make no mistake, I will be dealing with you accordingly.”

Moon screeched as she was dragged away, her eyes looking on with worry at the frightened Jester. “Run Pomni!” she screamed, “Run!”

She wanted to, Pomni really wanted to. But fear had paralysed her when Caine set his eyes on her again. Tears leaked from her eyes, feeling like the five-year-old girl he grabbed from the street the moment he caught of whiff of her power. “Caine, don’t do this,” she sniffed, “I’ll be better, I’ll practice more, I’ll stop singing just please don’t do this.”

“You know, I never did understand your silly little songs,” he mumbled, “You waste so much time on them yet you know the real reason the audience comes to see you, and it isn’t to hear those tacky lyrics of yours. You know exactly what you’re good for.”

That part stung. Yes she knew that her skills as a trapeze artist and her abilities was what got tickets to sell, but her songs were her passion. Her songs were her, something that Caine hadn’t been able to take away yet. She wanted to scream at him, to tell him that her songs were everything! But she was still too frail, and she was certain that it was only going to get worse.

“Caine please, I’m still recovering from last time and we have another show tonight!” she back away, kicking her legs as she crawled backwards on the ground. “Please don’t do this it…it hurts.”

“All good sacrifices come with pain Pomni,” Caine told her, reaching into his coat pocket and pulling out the amulet. “You should be thanking me for using this gift, I’m the one who’s actually putting it to good use.”

He held the amulet in front of him, Pomni’s eyes pleading for mercy. “Now my little possession,” he grinned, “It’s time for me to receive my gift.”

The amulet glowed, a loud whine leaving its source.

Pomni could feel her blood boiling, her head pounding and every part of her body shattering with pain when she felt her energy being ripped away from her. Her blue mist was forced away from her, being sealed away into the amulet as Caine looked on with greed.

It hurt, it hurt so much. Her skin was burning as though she had been lit up into a thousand flames, her hair being ripped from her scalp, and she was bleeding out of every pore of her body. She wanted it to stop, it hurts, just stop, please stop, STOP, STOP, STOP!

A pained scream ripped from her throat.

(2)

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Pomni woke in a cold sweat, her heart pounding in her chest. Her head whipped from side to side, scanning her surroundings in a dazed panic. She wasn’t in that lifeless tent anymore with that cruel ringmaster. She was in the castle, she was safe, and she was far away from him.

She let out a sniffle, bringing her knees up to her chest and hugging them tight as she buried her face into them. A few stray tears leaked onto the sheets, her sobs muffled against the blanket. That was the worst thing about her nightmares, they weren’t just that but memories too. It was real and it had happened. All they did was make her relive it over and over again.

Kaufmo told her many times that it wasn’t her fault for what Caine did, that his actions were his own doing. But seeing the repeated moments of her family being hurt over and over again just to protect her only made her guilt increase. Maybe Caine was right. Maybe it was her fault.

She took a deep breath, sitting upright and wiping the wetness off her cheeks. That was the past, there was no need to be self-pitiful about it now. She shouldn’t waste time fussing over stupid memories that only brought everyone else down the longer she thought about them. She just needed to get up and go throughout the day, push everything back until she’s able to manage it on her own.

Pomni swung her legs over her bed, going over to clean herself in the sink inside the connected bathroom, before moving behind the screen the maids gave her to change into a new dress she was given. She first pulled over a simple cream shift over her head, the silky fabric gliding over her skin. Next was a simple blue stays and puffy skirt, with two red hearts on each side of the skirt and ribbon of the same colour in a criss-cross pattern in the middle of her stays, with the bottom of the skirt being layered with red and white trim.

She did a onceover in the mirror as she pulled the strings off the stays shut, giving herself a quick nod before finally exiting her room.

Part of her wanted to bury back under the soft sheets of her bed, to hide whatever the day had to await her, her nightmare clawing at the back of her mind. But the moment she saw Prince Jax outside her door waiting for her, all doubts instantly vanished as a true and natural smile tugged at her lips.

“A good morning to you Prince Jax,” she greeted, giggling as Motley immediately jumped into her arms and climbed onto her shoulder, “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Only your smile little lady,” he grinned, eating up the little blush that dusted across her cheeks. “But that’s not the only reason I’m here. My parents asked me to collect you, they have an announcement for you and the rest of your family in the throne room.”

His brows were furrowed and face serious, this had to be a serious matter.

“Oh, lead the way then,” she said, anxiety started to grip at her again.

Jax sensed her apprehension, scooping her arm up and linking it with his, “Don’t worry, no matter what it is we’ll be able to figure it out. Promise.”

How does he do that? How does someone with the type of reputation that made her want to keep the farthest distance away from him as possible, say the simplest yet heartwarming things that might her heart spark? And how did he say it so honestly that she had to believe him? She cleared her throat, giving him a little smirk, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep Princey.”

His eyes were unchanging, still soft as he placed his other hand over her and rubbed his thumb over her fingers, “I don’t. You’re too important to risk.”

Pomni felt her heart skip a beat. If it weren’t for Motley purring against her ear, she wouldn’t have anything to ground herself from floating up to cloud nine. Her grip on his hand tightened, whispering, “Good.”

With a gentle smile and a steady hand, he led her out of the hallway and made their way to the throne room. Neither of them felt the need to run down the halls like they usually did, that experience would be for another type of day. For this day, the slow steady pace down the long halls of the palace was what the two of them needed. The comfortable silence of each other’s company was enough for both of them, not a single word had to be spoken. Was this what it would be like for Pomni if she were to stay? Just peace? No worries about what or who could come after her? That she could be free to express herself in any form she wished for, song, dance, art, speech? Where her powers would be hers and hers alone without the fear of them being used for someone else’s selfish exploitations? And where she could finally allow herself to open up to the idea of love? To spend her days with someone who would listen to anything and everything she had to say. To feel safe in the loving embrace of another. And she and Jax could live their days in nothing but peaceful bliss…

…Oh…OH!...oh…

Electricity struck through Pomni as the realisation dawned on her.

She had fallen in love with the prince.

Jax looked down at the jester once he felt her grip loosen on his, concern curling through him when he saw the worried look on her face. “Hey, it’s okay,” he said soothingly, capturing her attention as she blinked up at him. “I know that this whole ‘being called to the throne room’ thing seems pretty daunting, but trust me, there’s nothing to be afraid of. My parents always have a plan, so no matter what happens, I’m sure it’ll be alright.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” she nodded, giving him a soft smile before they continued walking. How she wished that were the reason why she suddenly felt so down. But no. She loved Jax, she had fallen so hard for him. But she didn’t have the luxury to stay with him. Someone like her couldn’t afford to love.

Bury it down, she inhaled deeply, don’t ruin this, not like everything else.

She wanted to enjoy this as much as she could before anything else could happen.

The throne room already had a small audience, consisting of the rest of the circus while Kinger and Queenie sat ahead of them on their thrones. The king and queen shared a nervous yet hopeful look, two emotions that could go either way depending on what the topic of conversation that were about to have. It only made the prince and jester all the more nervous.

“Thank you for joining us Pomni, I’m glad that our son is being a good host to you,” Queenie greeted, bowing her head to the girl.

“Well, he has become a very good friend to me over the past few days,” Pomni gave the prince a smile before focusing back on the queen, “If you don’t mind me asking your majesty, but why have you summoned us all here?”

“Hey, it’s okay kiddo,” Kaufmo walked up to her. Pomni detached her arm from Jax’s to put her hands in her father’s, the rabbit already missing the warmth of her touch. “They’ve already informed us that there is nothing to worry about.”

Pomni exhaled shakily, nodding. Though her nerves would get the best of her at times, Kaufmo’s voice was always something that kept her slightly grounded ever since she was a child. Even Motley’s purring added to that as well. With a final breath, she turned to the king and queen, ready to hear whatever they had to say.

Kinger cleared his throat, rising from his throne, “As you know, we’ve had our guards roam outside of our kingdom to make sure that Caine or his men haven’t been planning another invasion. Well, we’ve just had a report back and they’ve told us that the outer realm has been clear of them since the last attack.”

“We’ve told them to do one last surveillance before their final report, just to make sure that Caine isn’t lurking,” Queenie continued, “However, since there’s not been any sightings, we believe that it is safe for you to continue with your travels.”

 “So, how long do you determine that we stay in the castle?” Ragatha asked, “During the last surveillance.”

“Unless anything else comes back, I’d say you should stay at least one more week before you believe that you should go,” Queenie confirmed.

Several of the cast members let out a sigh of relief, the anxiety of Caine’s lurking washing away at the thought of being free to travel again. Though a bittersweetness hung in the air. The kingdom had been nothing but supportive and accommodating to them in their time of need. What was supposed to be a short time here to entertain the subjects here had turned into the kindest experience any of them had ever received in their entire lives.

For Pomni? While the thought of seeing new places (and being as far away from Caine as possible) thrilled her to her core. For the first time in her life, she actually wanted to stay. Don’t get her wrong, she still had her dreams of travelling the realms, to let audiences hear her songs - not watch her acts or witness her powers, but to listen to her songs. To listen to her singing. To listen to her.

But if she closed her eyes for a moment, only a moment, she wanted to let herself pretend. Pretend that she had a place here, to wake up in the morning and plan to do whatever she pleased, to go out into town and greet the other people of the kingdom as though she were one of them too. To sing in the town centre for whoever wanted to stop and hear her.

And perhaps, in the far back of her mind, she would go up to the castle and be greeted by a pair of yellow eyes and a Cheshire grin. Where he would take her hands into his and ask about her day, stroll in the gardens with her as he listened to whatever plans she wanted to venture. To listen to the songs that she only reserved for him and him alone. And until the midnight sky, watching the stars twinkle amongst the inky blanket of the nightly heavens, he would hold her in his arms, a silent promise that he would always love her. No matter what.

But now, she realised that there was no way to have that fantasy be real. Yes, Caine wasn’t spotted by any of the guards, but it didn’t change the fact that he was still out there. Still waiting for the chance to strike and get his hands on her and her powers. As long as Caine was after her, she could never have the life she dreamed of living.

Jax looked over the side of his shoulder, worry striking him when he saw Pomni’s crestfallen expression and the glazed look in her eyes. While he was sad that she was leaving (and deep down prayed that she could stay), a part of him believed that there would be some joy in the fact that she could finally be free to leave. He knew that something was wrong, “Pomni, what’s wrong?”

Pomni wanted to cry right there and then at how kind his words sounded, at how far the prince had come from the stereotype she expected from him. Why couldn’t she just keep hating him, why did he charm and endear her so much that she had to fall in love with him! It could have made everything so much easier. She wanted to tell him how much she wanted to stay, tell him all of the potential plans she could have had here, and how much she wanted him to be part of them. But the words kept getting stuck in her throat, as though an invisible hand had wrapped around her neck, silencing her from making any word that would ruin Jax too.

“However,” Kinger’s voice rang through the room. “There is one last thing we would like to do before you all take your leave.”

Pomni didn’t know whether to feel eased or frustrated at the sudden interruption.

“We would like to host a ball in your honour near the end of the week,” Queenie announced, “To thank you for all that you have done here.”

“For what we’ve done?” Ragatha titled her head in confusion, “Your majesty, you and your family are the ones who took care of us in our time of need?

Queenie eyes softened, a glimmer of a smile flickering in her gaze. A kind look that Jax knew all too well from his mother. “Yes, you and your family may have been under our care,” Queenie confirmed, “But it does not take away from the fact that you have all been an incredible presence in our kingdom. You have brought smiles to everyone, not just from your performances, but by simply being your best true selves for everyone to see. Even if you didn’t bring your tricks or talents, the moment you stepped out into town you all saw the world as authentic and beautiful, that’s what brought our subjects to you. That mind view is an incredible ability to possess, you’re lucky. Many people lack it. That’s why we want to celebrate you, for all of you cherishing the kindness that our kingdom was built upon. Doing that is the greatest thing our foreigners and travellers can do, that is why the entire kingdom is invited, so they can say one more final thank you and goodbye for all that you have done for us.”

Each member looked to one another, like a sparkler had been lit within their souls as they grinned at the prospect of a ball. Neither one of them had been to one before, mostly they would stay as long as they would need to in the town they were performing in, do the performance they rehearsed day and night to do before finally leaving up the time their shows were finished. They had only heard what happened at balls through whispers of stories from the other common folk. And now they could finally be a part of one.

Excited murmurs broke out between them, wondering what they could wear, where they could get their garments, what colours they should choose, what type of jewellery they would wear if they decided to wear them at all. There was just so many choices in so little time! It was all so amazing!

Pomni felt herself smiling. A ball. Like everyone else, she had never been to one. But Kaufmo’s fairytales left so many fantasies in her mind. When she was a teenager - after a rough night of performing and dealing with Caine’s wrath - she would dream about being at a ball, wearing the loveliest gown while dancing under the stars. Sometimes those dreams would include a handsome prince or princess sweeping her off her feet, taking her far away from all that hurt her.

She looked to Jax. She may be leaving after the end of the week, but it was still one night to have all her dreams come true. Even if it would only last for so long. “So,” she lightly nudged Jax’s shoulder, “I’m guessing you already have a plus one to bring to the ball. A princess no doubt.”

“Well I am planning on asking someone,” Jax confirmed. Pomni felt her face fall a bit, a little piece of her was hoping he would ask her. Huh, she never expected that thought to enter her mind. “She might not be a princess, but she has the spirit of one for sure.”

“Oh,” Pomni fiddled with her ring finger, “Well, she’s lucky if you’re the one who’s wanting to ask her.”

“I’m the lucky one if she says yes little lady,” he grinned, “Or rather, if you say yes.”

Pomni’s head snapped up.

“You really think I wouldn’t be asking you?” Jax chuckled, “Did you not see what I was like when I met you? Maybe you hit your head harder than you thought before I heroically saved you.”

“Shut up,” she shoved his lightly in the chest, unable to stop her own laughter from joining his. “I’ve never been to a ball hosted by royalty, I thought since you’re the prince that it was required for you to ask a princess or a noble to join you.”

“Maybe in other kingdoms,” he nodded, “But here, you’re the only lady I want by my side that night.” His breath wavered as his face went serious. His hands slightly shaky as he prepared himself for his next question. Years of his ego being his defining personality trait, to be able to get away with the most rioting pranks and wild parties, it all melted away when asking the girl of his dreams to a simple ball.

And this was the same prince who revelled in the promise of danger.

“Pomni,” he began, taking her hand still on his chest into his own, lacing their fingers together. “Would you do me the honour of accompanying me to the ball?”

She squeezed his hand, her stomach doing an excited little flip as she answered, “I’d love to.” The jester heard a disgruntled cough coming from behind her, and by Jax’s pale expression, she could tell who it was. She turned, coming face to face with Kaufmo, Ragatha and Moon, each of them wearing a stern look on their faces. “Pa, it’s okay. He asked and I agreed.”

“Don’t worry kiddo, I know you did. I trust you,” Kaufmo replied reassuringly to his daughter. “I just have a warning for the prince.”

Jax gulped at the three cold stares coming from the trio, if looks could kill then he was fairly sure he would be singing with the angels right about now. “Let me make this very clear,” Kaufmo began, “If Pomni is even slightly sad at the ball because of you, then I have no hesitation to let Ragatha use you as cat food for her lions.”

The ragdoll nodded, glaring at him with all her might. Moon didn’t even have to say anything, but the way she stood with Ragatha was enough to tell him that she had no problem assisting the redhead. He whipped his head to his parents, who hadn’t uttered a word during this whole ordeal.

“Don’t look at me,” Queenie put her hands up. “I’m not the one to judge a father for being protective over his daughter. Besides, he has a right to be wary of you darling.”

Jax shrugged with a nod, he couldn’t disagree there. He looked back at Pomni, her cheeks slightly flushed with a humoured smile on her lips after that whole interaction. How did she manage to look so beautiful in every way? He probably had a lovesick look on his face again, but he didn’t care. He didn’t care because this was her, nothing else mattered. “Well in that case,” he picked up her hand again, revelling in the way her cheeks flushed even more, “I can’t wait to see you there, my little lady.” He pressed a gentle kiss on the back of her hand, forcing himself not to laugh as he heard a silent squeal erupting from the back of her throat.

“A-and, I-I,” Pomni cleared her throat, straightening her back again and regaining the calmness she had before. “And I you, your highness.” She then enclosed his hand in both her palms, with the upmost gentleness she started running her thumb over his fingers, like he had done so with her hand earlier. All without breaking eye contact with him, she smirked when it was his turn for him to get all flustered.

She let go, giving him a small curtsy, “Now if you don’t mind, I’m fairly certain that the rest of the ladies and non-gender affirming friend are going to drag me to help them find ballgowns soon.”

Jax spluttered, trying to find the words that were in his head a few seconds ago. How on earth did this tiny powerful woman have this much of a hectic effect on him only from touching his hand?! “Y-yeah, I’m pretty sure my father will be doing that but for me,” he wasn’t able to focus on anything but the faint tingling of where her fingers had been on his hand, sending little shocks up the nerves on his arm. He flexed his hand, letting his fingers stretch to see if it would make any difference. The tingling only increased, his fur fluffing up at his neck at the reaction. He huffed fondly, worth it. “I look forward to seeing how beautiful you look.”

She raised her brow at him, rolling her eyes as he chuckled. He was always just so him wasn’t he? But it’s also why you fell in love with him, isn’t it? She sighed, yes, it was. In the amount of since she met him, he had become a far cry of what she believed him to be from the tales she heard. He had proven to be kind, noble and brave. Though still a little bit of a trickster, a good man and a good prince with a tender heart was all she could see. And soon she would have to leave all that behind.

She opened her mouth to say something, she wanted to say something, but she found herself being pulled away by Ragatha, Moon, Gangle and Zooble. Just like she had suspected, they were pulling her away to start dress shopping. “I’m afraid we’ll have to continue our conversation later!” she called out to Jax, looking over her shoulder while Motley jumped out of her arms and trotted back to the prince as she was dragged out of the ballroom.

Jax laughed at the scene in front of him, picking up the kitten and placing him on his shoulder, “I look forward to it.”

Pomni gave him one final smile, before joining in with the excited chatter with the rest of the ladies and Zooble.

However, once she was out of sight, did Jax let himself frown. The girl seemed so strangely down all morning, quieter and more reserved, less of the usual spunk than he had come to expect. Had something happened? Did he do something to offend her? Whatever it was he should at least try and make it up to her.

“You’re overthinking,” A familiar voice murmured. Jax turned to face his father walking towards him.

“I inherited it from you, old man,” the prince snickered. Kinger’s face didn’t move an inch, not willing to change the topic of conversation just yet. Jax sighed, “I’m worried about Pomni. She hasn’t really been herself much this morning. I didn’t want to pry into what it is cause its none of my business and I don’t wanna push her, she already felt pretty stressed out when she told me about her past. I don’t wanna add anymore onto that. But I can tell that something’s wrong, and I hate feeling helpless. I just want to protect her.”

Kinger hummed. He had heard this monologue many decades ago from when he was around Jax’s age. He should know, for Kinger was the one who said it too. “When I fell in love your mother, I was a wreck,” the king began. “Despite going round in circles to think of a way to win her heart, I also had other thoughts in my head as well. I worried that I could never protect her the way I wanted to, she could be sad for only a moment and I would panic that I had done something to hurt her. But when he married and grew together, I had to realise that I wasn’t a magical knight from a story book. Even with my crown I was only a man who loved his wife deeply. It hurts when we have to come to turns that we cannot protect everyone – including the ones we love – but no matter what we still try. We try because we know that it’s better for them to be in our lives than to lose them. We can do what we can and that’s all right, for what is love than the desire to guard what we care for the most?”

Clarity never hit Jax harder than it did right here in this moment. He lifted the hand that Pomni touched again, shifting his fingers where hers had been. His father was right. Even the biggest dam in all of the world would never be able to stop a crack, letting a flood release. And even if he wanted to, he knew that there were bigger forces out there who would do nothing but take Pomni for themselves. He squeezed his hand into a fist, but they would have to kill him first before ever hurting Pomni ever again. Even if he were to fall, her safety would forever and always come first for him. “Yeah,” he nodded, “It is.”

Kinger felt warmth radiate through him, it had been so long since he heard that part of his son speak so earnestly. He missed him, “Come now, it’s time we get you fitted. I’m sure you’ll want to look your best for your lady-friend at the ball.”

He snickered as he heard his son’s splutters, it was fun getting under Jax’s skin sometimes. A little petty revenge if that’s what you want to call it.

From the side, Kaufmo stood, hearing everything they had just said. For the first time, since Jax saved her, he was able to see clearly about what Pomni saw in the prince.

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Pomni was panicking. Which wasn’t a complete shock. Tomorrow was the ball and she had spent the entire week helping everyone else pick out their gowns expect for herself. The ladies had insisted on finding what colour would flatter her the most, but she had turned away in favour of finding something for them, insisting that she would find a garment for herself soon. And yet, here she was. Gown-less and nearing a mental breakdown.

She groaned, honestly she blamed herself. She had been so caught up in the nightmares that she had and the future aftermath of the ball. Caine would always be breathing down her neck, something she would never be able to shake away even after they escaped from him the first time, and soon she would be returning to that fear. When she met Jax, somehow his foolishness and change in behaviour had been able to forget about her worries for a while, despite their first meeting. He only had to say one word and the rest of the world didn’t matter, it was just bliss. Soon, she wouldn’t have that anymore. She’d soon return to surviving for herself and her family, looking over her shoulder constantly to make sure a pair of blue and green eyes wouldn’t be staring back at her.

She just wanted to be selfish, just once and stay here. Stay with Jax, stay in the kingdom, stay in the life that she oh so wanted to have. But the thought of Caine harming Jax because of his obsession with her powers was a risk that she never wanted to take…after all, it was the same risk that her village was raided and burned to the ground.

How dare you think of that, how dare you even think about staying. You could lose everything just because of your entitlement you stupid girl! Pomni felt tears well up in her eyes, You’re selfish! Selfish! Selfish! Selfish! Selfish-

A knock at her door broke her away from her panic, wiping away her tears and smoothing down the fabric of her skirt. “Just coming!” she hoped her voice didn’t give away the fact that she had been crying.

She had expected either Ragatha or Kaufmo to show up at her door, so it was quite the shock when it was Queenie who had appeared, holding a large yet flat box under her arm. “Apologies, I don’t mean to intrude Pomni but I…Oh darling, what happened?” the queen asked, her brows furrowing with worry.

Pomni wanted to rub at her eyes again, to hide any evidence of her tears. But the queen had already put the box down and took the jester’s hands into hers, leaving Pomni unable to hide. “It’s nothing, your majesty,” Pomni brushed off her worries, “Please, don’t mind me, I’ll be okay.”

“Oh honey,” The queen wrapped her arms around the girl, “This is a safe place, your tears aren’t nothing. Whatever it is you’re feeling, don’t ever be afraid to say it.” 

Pomni typically wasn’t one for physical touch, usually it was reserved for those she was close with like Kaufmo or Ragatha – and now it included Jax. But this was different. Queenie’s warmth reminded her of a familiar touch that she had not received in a long time. A touch of a mother reassuring her child that everything was going to be okay. And though Pomni couldn’t remember her face, that small yet significant warmth from her mother stayed with the girl throughout her life. And now, she was receiving the same touch from Queenie, another mother who fiercely loved her son.

Pomni clutched onto the queen, her small body shaking with silent sobs. Queenie was patient and gentle the whole time, rubbing her hand up and down the jester’s back, shushing in her ear like how she did with Jax when he was young whenever he got scared or bruised his knee. She had only heard snippets from Jax about what the girl’s childhood what like, he didn’t tell her everything, after all, only Pomni could be the one to detail her past to another. But what she heard was enough for her to know that this poor girl had went through hell and back. She wasn’t surprised to see Jax so protective over her after their day at the village festival, whatever Pomni had told him there was enough for him to guard her with everything he had.

Once the girl was quiet, she pulled away, leaning into the queen’s touch when the latter lifted her hands to Pomni’s face and brushed her tears away. “Are you okay to tell me what wrong my dear?” Queenie asked, as kindly and patiently as she could.

Now Pomni understood how Jax was able to show kindness the way he did. “Is it…is it wrong for me wanting to stay?” Pomni spoke softly, as though a single wrong word would make everything crumble. “I love my family, and I’m so grateful for the hospitality that you’ve given us and I can’t wait to get back on the road again, but...I never had a real home in so long. That isn’t to mean Kaufmo and the others aren’t! They have always been my home. I’m just…I’m so tired of running. I’m tired of not being able to live a normal life and pursue my dreams because of the threat of one man. Your kingdom, that has been a home for me after so long. For the first time in my life I didn’t have to run, I could be safe in the knowledge that I was protected…and Jax. Your son has to be one of the sweetest people I have ever met, despite his reputation. But the thought of leaving here? It already makes me feel homesick thinking about it…I-I’m sorry your majesty I didn’t mean to overload you with all of that!”

Queenie had not spoken a word, letting Pomni take the time she needed in order to let out everything that was tying her down to the ground, like releasing her from being chained to a boulder. Pomni had more pages than the heaviest book in the world, each piece unfolding a new layer of her that made the queen’s heart ache for the girl. “My darling, I am queen of a kingdom where people need to unload on me,” Queenie told her. “It is my job to help those who cannot help themselves. Do not apologise for letting yourself feel. You might not be my subject, but that does not mean I will not take your problems seriously.”

Was this what having a mother was like? She wouldn’t trade Kaufmo for the world, but that never stopped the lingering curiosity of what her own mother would have been like. All she had left of her mother were blurry images in her mind, the powers she shared with her, and her love of music. If her mother was still here would she offer her the same comfort and security that Queenie did for her in only a few short moments? It was times like this, times her soul twinged with sorrow and doubt when she wished that her life was different. That it could be of her own making. She would be in her village, under the care and singing day and night with her mother, only traveling when she wanted to find new places to play her songs, meet the other members of the circus under different circumstances, and fall in love with Jax without having to worry about leaving him.

Why did life choose her to be so cruel to?

“Thank you, your majesty,” Pomni bowed her head in appreciation, “I’m sorry again for such a heavy topic.”

“You must learn to stop saying sorry, dear,” there was a joking tone in Queenie’s voice as she wagged her finger at Pomni, “Otherwise I’ll have to make a rule to ban you from saying it.”

Pomni laughed at that, tears of mirth pricking in the corners of her eyes instead.

Queenie’s eyes smiled, softening as her hands encased the jester’s again, “Not every bad thing that happens is your fault. Please hold onto that information for when you travel again…Pomni, it’s not my place but if you were to stay, we would be more than happy to protect you from Caine.”

Pomni’s face fell, “That’s the thing your majesty. Caine always comes up with new plans, if I stayed he wouldn’t stop terrorizing this kingdom until he gets what he wants, No one is powerful enough to stop him.”

“He managed to get arrested once,” Queenie pointed out, “He can be again.”

“He also managed to escape,” Pomni said, her face saddening once again. “You’d think someone with powers like mine that I could be able to do something. But even now, he still has a hand around my neck. I could be the strongest person alive yet I’d still be too scared to face him. You have…you have no idea what he put us through.” Her heart squeezed, she felt so damn pathetic.

“I don’t know what he’s done, but I do know that you didn’t deserve it,” Queenie told her. “Never feel ashamed for feeling afraid because of what that monster did to you. Do what makes you feel safest my darling, and if you ever want to come back our castle doors are always open.”

Pomni sniffed, a smile brightening her face once again, “Jax is lucky to have you.”

“And he’s lucky to have you too,” the queen teased, humming laughter as the jester started gasping and stuttering. “Now, speaking of Jax. I understand that he asked you to be his plus one for the ball. I hope it’s not inappropriate but I do have something that you could wear. If you don’t already.”

“I-I don’t,” Pomni’s jaw fell a little in surprise at the kind gesture. “You didn’t have to do that your majesty, not for me.”

“Nonsense,” Queenie shook her head, picking up the box from the ground and bringing it over to Pomni’s bed. “Every girl deserves to have something nice for themselves. Besides, I was hoping you would wear this.”

Pomni bit her lip, the queen had a pleading look in her eyes. Whatever was in that box, it was enough to convince the jester that whatever was in it held significant importance to the royal. “Okay, um, I’d like to look at it,” Pomni answered, fidgeting with her hands for a moment.

The queen lit up, like a sun shining in the jester’s direction as the chess piece’s fingers went lift up the lid of the box. As soon as it was removed, Pomni’s breath hitched at the contents on the inside. What laid in the box was nothing short of the twilight sky stitched and sewn together into a ballgown. It was too much, “Your majesty, I can’t have this! Someone like me shouldn’t wear this!”

“Someone like you is perfect for this gown,” Queenie stated. “It was a gift to me in my younger years, from a good friend of mine in another kingdom. She wanted me to wear this, saying that it would be worn when I was with my true love. I never had a chance to wear it, after all Kinger was already courting me and I didn’t feel good enough to wear it. Ironic, I know. However, something tells me that this dress wasn’t meant for me.” She looked away from the gown to face Pomni again. “But perhaps it was for you.”

“I…” Pomni was speechless, truly. The gown that laid in the box looked as though it was worth all the gems in the realm, if she were to wear that, she would literally be wearing that costed millions. Yet the queen believed that it was perfect for her. She had said it so earnestly that Pomni couldn’t find it in herself to turn it away. “Thank you, your majesty,” Pomni bowed, “I promise to take care of it during the ball.”

“As long as you’re having fun as yourself, then that’s all I care about,” the queen told her. “Now, let me help you get ready. I have an idea on what makeup would go well with that gown.”

Pomni giggled as the queen rushing over to her vanity at the other end of the room. Pomni ran her fingers over the gown’s fabric, perhaps she was worth more than what she believed.

.

.

.

Jax pulled at the collar of his shirt. His suit was nowhere near uncomfortable, but it didn’t stop the anxiety coursing through his veins. The suit in question was consisted of a long navy-blue waistcoat, with ruby embroidery along the lapels and cuffs with matching trousers with the same crimson detailed design. Underneath the button coat was a white blouse with a ruffled collar and a pendant on top, with the final addition of his outfit being a red rose tucked into his breast pocket.

Why was he so nervous you ask? It was all because of Pomni. She had yet to arrive, and though the ball hadn’t started yet, both guests and the circus group had already flooded the ballroom. He hadn’t seen any of the nobles yet, well, the nobles that he normally couldn’t stand. When asking his parents about the matter, they had merely shrugged with a mischievous glint in their eyes, yet it told Jax exactly what they did. And they’re still surprised by the fact that I turned out to be a trickster he grinned to himself.

His hands were shaking. What if something happened to her while she was getting ready? What is she hurt herself and wasn’t able to attend? What if Caine somehow managed to get into the castle and swiped her away?! Oh god he had to go get her-!

“Relax prince boy,” a hand grabbed him by the back of his coat, dragging him back before he could run off. He scowled, turning to see who did that, when he came face to face with Gangle and Zooble. The girl he had rudely pushed upon their first meeting, and her justifiably angry partner. “Pomni’s fine, Gangle went to check up on her a while ago.”

“How did you know I was thinking about Pomni?” he questioned, raising a brow.

“Gee, it’s not like you’ve been spending every waking moment glued to her side ever since she came here,” Zooble replied sarcastically, rolling their eyes at the rabbit’s question.

“Zooble,” Gangle hissed, “Be nice, please.” The body of ribbons looked back at him, not as upset as he thought she would be after their interaction when they met. She was wearing a sleeveless gown the same colour as her ribbons, with a full skirt and rubies sewn atop of it. Zooble was wearing a suit of the same colour, no doubt wanting to match his sweet girlfriend. “Pomni will be here soon, your mother kinda overwhelmed her while getting ready.”

The prince sighed. “Of course she did,” he shook his head fondly at Queenie’s direction, the woman was laughing with her husband at whatever joke he had come up with. He looked back to Gangle, who was looking up at Zooble with nothing but love in her eyes, the other doing the same. He hadn’t apologised to her for what he did, yet she still talked to him as though he had only brushed her shoulder on that day. He wouldn’t blame her if she were to be as upset as their hot-headed partner, yet she didn’t. That only made the guilt sting all the more.

She deserved an apology. “Listen, uh, Gangle right?” he asked, making the ribboned lady look up at him with worried eyes. She probably thought that he was going to be mean to her again, it only rubbed more salt into the wound. Jax was sure Zooble was going to kill him right there and then with the way she was glaring at him. He gulped, “Listen, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for how I treated you when we met. It was ignorant and entitled of me to do that to you and how I treated Pomni as well. I genuinely care for your friend and I’m extremely ashamed of how poorly I was to you. I deeply apologize.”

There was shift in the way Gangle looked at him, she didn’t look as worried as she was before, her posture was straighter as she gazed at him with intent in her mind. “Thank you for your apology your highness,” she replied, “Though I’m still not happy with you pushing me, I’m glad you’re able to realise the error of your ways.”

“Of course,” he nodded, “And please, call me Jax. If I’m going to make a fresh start, I would like if you could call me by my name.”

Gangle smiled, a new determination flickering when she saw this new side of the prince, “Very well, thank you Jax.”

“I’m still onto you,” Zooble growled. “But…I’m glad you’re not a total dickhead…you’re still pretty dumb though.”

“Zooble!” Gangle hissed.

A snort escaped from Jax, surprising the couple when a loud belly laugh boomed throughout the ballroom. The laugh lacked any type of maliciousness or was mean-spirited, it was just a hearty yet a pure and honest carefree laugh. “They-” he snickered, “They aren’t wrong! I haven’t had the brightest ideas in my lifetime.”

Both the body of ribbons and the assortment of shapes were a little surprised by the prince’s reaction. They were fairly certain that he would have made some sort of passive aggressive comment or even get angry at Zooble. But no. It was the same sort of laugh that one of them would have whenever Kaufmo told one of his better jokes or when they all had fun as a family. Zooble smirked, “See Gangle, princey doesn’t mind.”

Gangle groaned, rolling her eyes, “What am I gonna do with you?”

“Hmmm, love me forever?” Zooble retorted cheekily, wiggling his eyebrows.

“If I have to,” Gangle couldn’t keep the grin off her face, resting her head onto Zooble’s shoulder.

Jax’s laughter ebbed away, a softness lacing his heart. That tenderness and comfort the couple shared with one another, he couldn’t help but imagine it with him and Pomni. To let her feel safe with him no matter what, to share sweet moments with him with no other prying eyes. But after tonight, she’ll be gone, along with his wish for all of that. All this because of a power-hungry man who kept her in a state of fright ever since childhood, it wasn’t fair for someone as sweet as Pomni.

“Ah, I see the prince has graced our presence,” a soft voice spoke. He looked up to see that it was Ragatha’s voice he had heard, with Sun and Moon by her side and Kaufmo trailing behind her. She looked towards Gangle and Zooble, “He hasn’t given you two any trouble, has he?”

“Quite the opposite, actually,” Zooble said, “He came over to apologise to Gangle.”

Ragatha raised a brow, shifting a little bit in her place, as if this were a small shock to her. “Did he know?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Zooble nodded, what they said next made it look like they were going to hurl just having to form it into words. “I guess I was…wrong about him. Oh god I hated saying that.” 

“Oh,” was all Ragatha said. The doll in question was wearing a backless gown of midnight blue, sleek and sparkling, no puffiness in sight as long skirt trailed behind her. She wore long silky white gloves and half of her curls were pinned up into a bun while the other red locks pooled around her shoulders.

Moon was wearing something similar, though hers was pure black with little stars stitched onto the fabric, with a double leg slit and a feathered scarf around her shoulders. Sun was wearing a red and yellow striped waistcoat and trousers, along with a simple white blouse and a black bowtie wrapped around the collar.

Lastly was Kaufmo, whose waistcoat and trousers were sewn with a fine grey silk with what seemed to be music notes embroidered into the lapels and cuffs. He pulled at the collar a few times, he hadn’t worn something like this before so it was a bit new to him. But he looked happy with his new attire.

“Well,” Ragatha’s voice broke Jax out of his trance again, “I’m glad you weren’t up to anything foolish, after all I still have two very hungry lions.”

“Don’t forget the meat cleaver you have darling,” Moon pointed out, “It would be such a shame to see such a lovely tool go to waste.”

“Uh…and I’m here!” Sun cheered, not wanting to be left out. While it did relieve some of the tension, it didn’t stop Jax from shrinking under the glares of the women.

“While I support your protection over my daughter,” Kaufmo interrupted, placing a hand on Ragatha’s shoulder, “Let’s wait until the prince does anything before charging headfirst. Besides, something tells me that he would want to join in with that protection as well.” The clown gave Jax a knowing wink. “But make no mistake, you hurt her and not even the guards will stop Ragatha and Moon with what they want to do with you.”

Jax gulped, “Understood, sir.” Despite the obvious threat, the fact that he had Kaufmo’s acknowledgement about how much he cared for Pomni made Jax want to sing. The clown trusted the prince, and Jax wasn’t going to let him down. Pomni mattered to him just as much as she mattered to Kaufmo, there was no way he was going to break that trust.

“I’m surprised that little Motley cat isn’t with you,” Sun said, “Other than Pomni, you two are practically glued together.”

Jax was about to open his mouth to say another word, until a small mew interrupted him. The group looked at him with wide eyes, the sound not going unnoticed. The rabbit sighed, reaching into the side of his coat pocket and pulled Motley out, the little kitten wearing a blue bowtie around his neck.

Everyone’s mouth fell open, it was quite the sight indeed.

“This little bugger insisted that he should join me tonight,” Jax defended.

“Right, a non-speaking animal somehow managed to convince you to let him come to the ball,” Zooble drawled with doubt.

Jax frowned, though he didn’t feel mad. So far, everything was going well. The guests were happy, he had Motley in his arms, there were no sign of the nobles, the music was lovely, the food was delicious, his parents were delighted and he had won over the favour of the circus group. All that was missing is-

“-Pomni,” Kaufmo’s eyed widened as he gazed up to the staircase leading out of the ballroom.

The rest of the group followed the clown’s eyes, their own jaws dropping when they say who he was looking at. The rest of the ballroom had gone silent as well, so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Jax whipped round, wondering why everyone was reacting the way they did…oh…he understood perfectly now.

Pomni stood at the top of the staircase, the only way to describe how she looked was breathtaking. Her gown was the most beautiful shade of purple, startling at a light pinkish lavender at the top as it faded into an amethyst shade in the middle before finishing in a plum shade at the bottom. Her skirt was full, layered with organza, rippling like raindrops on a pond. The top of the gown had off-the-shoulder sleeves with a sweetheart neckline, with glistening gem at the centrepiece. And the whole gown twinkled with little diamonds stitched into the fabric. She wore simple makeup, with her normally short hair curled and now reaching her shoulder as it gleamed under the chandeliers.

She clenched her hands, there were so many eyes on her. She didn’t have the façade of her jester persona to help her out, it was only her they were all looking at. Gathering herself, she managed a small curtsey, the shimmering layers of her skirt pooling around her. She stood again, her gown swishing as she made her way down the steps.

Jax couldn’t wipe the awestruck grin he had on his face even if he tried. Not even the stars could compare with how beautiful she looked. He handed Motley over to Kaufmo, “Sir, if you may. Could I please lead your daughter for the first dance?”

Kaufmo smiled, running his hand over the kitten’s back as he purred, “Go on, give her a dream come true.”

Not wasting a beat, Jax turned back to Pomni. He wasn’t sure if he saw him yet, so ever so slowly, he made his way towards her, the rest of the guests parting to let him through.

They had done the same with Pomni, giving her the room she needed yet not being able to take their eyes off her. A little part of her liked the attention, they weren’t drawn to her for powers or the act she had to put on, they were drawn to her for simply being her. This new feeling was strange, but nice…really nice.

She let out a small gasp when she finally saw Jax, how handsome he looked in his garments and how he looked at her as though she were the only person in the room. Her heart fluttered seeing him, making her way towards him as he did the same. Finally they met in the middle of the room, the only ones in the middle of the ballroom floor, their eyes locked onto one another.

“Prince Jax,” she breathed.

“My lady,” his voice held nothing but adoration for her. “You look absolutely exquisite.”

“I’ve been praying all day not to trip in this,” she whispered, “I think I would perish if I ruined something as lovely as this.”

  “That would be a shame, you look too beautiful in it,” Jax murmured, “Um. Pomni, would you do me the honour of letting me lead you through this first…” he trailed off. Could you blame him? She was positively stunning.

“…Dance?” she finished for him, a small grin forming on her lips.

“Uh, yes of course, dance,” he stuttered, laughing awkwardly.

Pomni took pity on him, nodding excitedly. Call her childish, but it was nothing short of magical that she actually got to dance like the princesses she read about in fairytales.

Jax’s face fell, a serious look took over yet his eyes were still soft as he brought his hand forward, pulling Pomni closer to him. The girl’s breath hitched, with these newfound feelings she had for Jax, it made this touch all the more significant. A shiver ran down her spine.

The music of the orchestra began, filling the ballroom with the sounds of the many violinists and pianists’ instruments, a soft yet heavenly tune echoing in the room. Ever so gently, Jax began to sway, with Pomni repeating his movements. Pomni gulped as he led her further into the dance, she could feel everyone’s stares despite having her back to them. Who wouldn’t? After all, she was the prince’s choice to lead the first dance with. “They’re all looking at you,” she whispered.

“Believe me,” he grinned, “They’re all looking at you.”

Normally she would have panicked at that sentence, but the gentle grasp of his warm hand on her waist kept her attention on him. He picked up her forearm with his, letting it glide up and down, “Just focus on me, okay? And follow my lead.”

Pomni nodded, her once quickening heart slowing down as she gazed into his eyes. He took her hand, carefully spinning her before she held she gently grazed the knuckles of said hand against his cheek. He threaded his fingers through her, spinning her again as the skirts of her gown fluttered around her, giving her the appearance of a butterfly.

The repeated the range of movements a few more times before Jax wrapped his arm around her waist again, pulling her closer than he did before, their noses inches from each other as he clasped his free hand into hers again. Pomni’s breath stuttered as their feet travelled around the empty space, never in her life had she felt anything so surreal, so euphoric in all her life. A carefree laugh escaped her lips as both she and Jax spun again, the prince doing the same as the picture of her lovely smile imprinted into his mind again.

He released the grip on her waist to twirl her onto the empty space on the floor, the rest of the crowd aweing at the way her gown glittered each time she spun left and right while holding onto Jax’s hand.

Not even the rest of the circus troupe could erase the butterflies they were having just by the way the prince and the jester looked at one another. It was right out of a love story. “I can’t disagree, they would make a beautiful couple,” Kaufmo remarked, with Motley letting out an agreeable mew in his arms.

“I suppose so,” Ragatha nodded, “As long as he doesn’t hurt her.”

“Don’t worry my dears, rest assured that my son would never do the following,” Queenie told them as she and Kinger snuck up behind the group.

“Your majesties,” Ragatha gasped, the rest of them quickly bowing, “Please forgive me for saying that.”

“Oh that’s alright,” Queenie snickered, “Jax has caused one too many incidents to have a reputation that’s worth your worry.”

“Though I will say, your Pomni has him wrapped around her finger,” Kinger mused as he watched the due dancing on the floor. “I haven’t seen this side of my son in so long, until your daughter arrived Kaufmo.”

“Pomni has always found a way to bright the best out in others,” Kaufmo told them, “Whether they know she’s doing it or not.”

Kinger hummed in agreement, “I can confidently say that without a doubt, this is the best ball this kingdom has ever seen.” Kaufmo nodded, the two fathers turning to look back at their children, smiling at seeing how happy they were together.

Jax had twirled Pomni a few times, still holding her by the waist until he picked her up in both arms and held her high up above him, twirling her in the air as the crowd oo’ed and clapped for the sudden display. Though it was silent compared to the chimes of her giggles at the sudden motions, bringing her back down to face level. Neither of them could stop glancing at each other’s lips, the temptation to swoop down and capture them growing stronger.

Before he could give into it, he saved himself by dipping Pomni once more time as the music slowed. It was for the best, she would be leaving tomorrow. He didn’t want to sour things more for her, not when they had come so far. He could tell by the way she was looking at him that she was silently agreeing, what they had right now was good, good enough in fact.

The music slowed to a stop, with Pomni curtsying and Jax bowing respectively as the crowd thunder into applause. The first dance of the night was a success.

They allowed themselves to breathe for a movement, unable to take their eyes off each other before the music started up again, more fun and livelier than the last. More couples ran onto the floor, including the king and queen as they chortled together while reminiscing how they used to dance when they were younger. Gangle had pulled Zooble onto the floor, squealing with excitement at the thought of dancing with her partner. Even Moon and Ragatha had decided to dance together, the latter shocked when her friend took her hand and led her into a dance.

Pomni and Jax were still together, and quite frankly, they didn’t see themselves dancing with anyone but with one another. And so, they danced again. And again, and again, and again…

After a few songs, they did have to stop eventually, panting heavily and needing food as well as drink. “I must say, you dance pretty good for someone so short,” Jax snickered, handing her a glass of water.

“Shut up, I’m just glad you didn’t stand on my dress,” Pomni retorted, giggling into her glass. She gulped down as much as she could, especially with what she was planning to do next. “Do you mind waiting for a second? There’s something I need to take care of.”

“Oh, of course, is everything alright?” he asked as she handed him back her glass.

“Yes, everything’s fine,” she reassured him, “There’s just something that I need to do.”

“Well, whatever it is, you take care of yourself,” He told her, “Alright?”

Pomni nodded, patting his hand reassuringly before disappearing into the crowd, Jax sighing fondly as he watched her walk away. He nearly jumped when he felt something rub against his leg, looking and scoffing when he saw that it was Motley. “Of course it’s you, you little shit,” he muttered, scooping up the kitten with one hand, “Alright, you had your fun. Now you’re in time out.”

“Well I must say,” Jax turned when he heard his mother’s voice, “I think this is the most you two haven’t been able to keep your hands off one another.”

“Mom!” he groaned, his ears flopping down and pressing against the back of his head as his cheeks flushed in embarrassment.

“What? I’m just making an observation,” she shrugged, “It does make sense though, with her leaving tomorrow.”

His ears perked back up at the mention of that, his tail twitching in discomfort. Although that statement would ring true every time he heard it, it didn’t mean he liked it. He wanted to get on his knees, beg Pomni to stay with him, stay in the kingdom where she would never worry about feeling afraid ever again. But he knew that it wouldn’t be fair for either of them. He knew as much as she wanted the freedom of her own life, the freedom of this choice was all she could have. And he didn’t want to make her feel guilty about having to travel again. Even if it meant she would be further away from him.

“I…I really love her mother,” he said, earnestly and honestly. “I have become an ocean and Pomni is a storm, raining down on me strongly without resistance, but my waters are able to take her strengths, faults, everything. But I know that…I can’t have her.”

Queenie’s face fell, her son had never looked so vulnerable in that moment. It reminded her how she felt when she fell in love with Kinger when she was her son’s age. “Oh darling,” she murmured, cupping his cheek in her hand. Even Motley had climbed up onto the prince’s shoulder, rubbing his fluffy face against Jax’s face to comfort him.

The queen was going to say another word when a single strum of a guitar made the room go silent. Both the queen and prince turned, for on the stage with the rest of the musicians was Pomni, holding onto her guitar as she looked out onto the crowd. She looked positively petrified, there were more people here than there was at the festival, the confidence slipping as doubt crept into her mind.

But when her eyes caught Jax’s, and as he smiled at her with the upmost reassurance, the doubt started to melt. She could do this, taking a breath as she faced her new audience, “This is a song that I wrote during my stay here. It’s a little bit different than what I’ve written before but I hope you all enjoy.” Her fingers pricked at the strings of her guitar before her voice rang like a bell as she began to sing.

Honey, I hate wine

But I’d gladly down a bottle of your name

Just to get another taste of you

A single drop not on my tongue would be a waste

The audience seemed to be enjoying so far, leaning next to their partners or spouses as Pomni continued to sing.

And I hate mornings

But I like waking next to you

You always wake up before I do

So I can sleep in your embrace

We burn like gentle firewood

We yearn like vines and leaves

And we settle in the comfort of

The bones that rest beneath

And I’d start drinking wine and sleeping at night

To keep your soul with mine

I’d do anything, anything, anything

Anything, anything, anything

Pomni could hear the distant murmurs in the crowd, murmurs of praise and how much they enjoyed her simple song. Her heart nearly skipped a beat form excitement as the rest of her doubts faded away. People liked her songs, people liked her. Her songs meant something!

Honey, I hate travel

But I’d man a boat to glimpse you at the shore

No stretch of miles would ever mean more

Than feeling my hands wrapped around your waist

And I hate time

The minutes shared will never last enough

No amount of time will ever be too much

And parting leaves a bitter taste

At that last word, Pomni turned her attention to Jax, who was patting the side off his leg at each beat of the song. She thought she would hate him, she despised him when hearing about all the rumours that built over the years. But now, nothing tasted as sour than the idea of leaving him tomorrow.

We burn like gentle firewood

We yearn like vines and leaves

And we settle in the comfort of

The bones that rest beneath

And I’d stop staying home and wasting time

To keep your soul with mine

I’d do anything, anything, anything

Anything, anything, anything

She would. She would do anything to change the fate that life had given them. She wanted to have that choice to stay. Jax’s eyes never left hers, not even more a second as he smiled with all the warmth he could muster. If this was truly their last night together, she was going to make it count.

And I love rain

But I’d ruin every cashmere coat I own

Before I let it wash off any kiss you stole

So they’ll keep us dry as I walk you home

We burn like gentle firewood

We yearn like vines and leaves

And we settle in the comfort of

The bones that rest beneath

And I’d lose every penny that I find

To keep your soul with mine

I’d do anything, anything, anything

Anything, anything, anything

With that final strum of her guitar, she finished her song. There was a beat, it felt like years to Pomni as she waited to hear the crowd’s final thoughts on her song. Suddenly, the audience erupted into applause, grins nearly splitting their faces.

She let out a sigh of relief, they really did like it. She placed her guitar backstage as she walked away, letting the band strike up again. She strolled towards Jax, determination set in her mind, she meant it when she said she was going to make this night count. “Another dance your highness?” she asked when she got close to him, holding out her hand, “Or are you afraid I’ll look better than you?”

Jax took her hand into his, his smile matching hers, “Little lady, you could trip and you would still look better than me.”

Pomni hummed, “You’re right, I would.”

They snickered as they want back to the dance floor, dancing the night away until the ball came to an end. It was the most magical thing Pomni had done without her powers.

.

.

.

Jax groaned as he sat up in his bed. He had been trying to get to sleep for the past few hours, but he could still feel the tingles of where Pomni’s hands had been on him while dancing. That night was going to be burned in his brain for the rest of his life. He wished she was here right now, to hold her while she ran her fingers through his ears, his fur, wherever she wanted as long as he felt that simple lingering touch.

The prince sighed, shifting as he reached his hand to find Motley, onto to find that the feline was nowhere to be found on the bed. Don’t tell me that little cretin went back down to go ham on those leftovers. He threw the sheets off his bed, ready to exit the room when there were three soft knocks on his door.

Strange, the servants didn’t use that knock and neither did his parents. He opened the door, it was Pomni holding a purring Motley. “I, um, thought I’d return him,” she spoke quietly, her voice breaking slightly, “He woke me up.”

Jax didn’t take him just yet instead leaning in slightly closer to inspect Pomni’s face. His heart plummeted when he saw dried tear stains on her cheeks, “Have you been crying?”

“W-what?” Pomni stammered, “N-no, of course not! I-it’s probably-”

“Pomni,” he spoke sternly, “I know when someone had been crying, I’m not that dumb. Please, tell me what’s wrong.”

She took a breath, walking into his room as Jax shut the door behind him. She sat on the edge of his bed, the prince sitting next to her as she cuddled Motley closer. “I sometimes have really bad nightmares,” she told him. “Well, I’ve always had them but they got worse when we escaped Caine and he came after us. Some of them are about ways on how he’d find us and how he’d make us suffer, others are…well, memories of growing up in the circus…”

Jax brows furrowed as the girl curled in on herself, making her seem smaller than usual, “And I’m guessing you had one now?”

She sniffed, nodding her head as Motley pushed his face into her neck, purring as much as he could to give comfort to the girl. Jax brought her into his arms, she let out a surprised squeak as he rubbed a hand up and down her back. “It’s okay, you’re safe here,” he told her, “I won’t let anything happen to you.”

“I know,” she whimpered, easing into his touch, “But I won’t be here tomorrow. And I know no one has seen Caine, but it doesn’t stop the fact that he’s still out there looking for us…looking for me.”

Jax wanted to kick himself for saying that. Why her? Why did the universe make her go through the hardest trails life had to offer? It wasn’t fair. “I know what you’re going to say if I asked you,” he ran his fingers through her hair, “But I wished in another life, you could stay.”

“Jax, I…I wish I could too,” she cried, burying her face in his chest.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed, “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that. But, just for tonight, stay…with me?” She peered up at him through her lashes, his fingers wiping her tears away. “For one night, please…be mine?”

She wrapped her hand around his, bringing it up to her face to cup her cheek, “I am yours, as you are mine.”

“For you Pomni,” he mumbled, carrying her over to the middle of his bed and laying her down, “Always.”

That night, they slept in each other’s arms. That night, they pretended tomorrow didn’t exist. That night, they weren’t Prince of Laphria or jester of the traveling circus. That night they were Pomni and Jax, two people in love.

.

.

.

Kaufmo let out a grunt as he closed the door of the trunk connected to the circus carriage, “I think that’s everything.”

“I’ll say,” Zooble whistled, “I feel like we have more than we did at the last place.”

“Well we were here longer than we have been in other places,” Pomni pointed out.

The circus troupe was outside the palace doors, finally ready to leave. The king and queen had guards to travel with them to their next location, to make sure they would have the extra protection they needed in case Caine was nearby. It had been a wonderful dream here, but like all dreams, it had to end.

Pomni was wearing the same dress she wore when she first came to the kingdom, her simple blouse, corset and pink skirt. She gave the palace one more look, out of all the places she had been to, this one was her favourite. And now she had to leave.

“The king, queen and prince had already given us our goodbyes,” said Ragatha, holding onto Moon’s hand. “Our we ready to go?”

Kaufmo looked to his daughter, “What do you say kiddo? Ready to go?”

Pomni sighed as she turned to her father, he frowned as he saw her downed expression. He hated seeing her like that. She was going to open her mouth to speak when-

“-Pomni!” Jax, it was Jax. She whipped round and saw the prince running out the palace doors and towards her.

“Jax? What’s wrong?” she asked, running over to him.

“I know we already said our goodbye inside,” he explained, “But I needed to do one more thing before you leave.”

Pomni nodded, looking back at the rest of her family, “I’ll be a minute, you finish packing.” The rest of the circus gave each other knowing looks, doing as they were told when Pomni gave them a glare. When they went back to packing, she turned back to Jax, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” his voice sounded nervous, “I just…I want you to have Motley.”

She gasped as she looked at the kitten held in Jax’s arms, the little feline already jumping into hers, “Me? Why?”

“Little monster likes you better than me, traitor,” he frowned at Motley.

Pomni stifled a laugh, “He’s a sweetheart, admit it. Plus, he loves you too. I can’t separate you too.”

“Hey, I’ll be okay,” Jax told her, “Besides, it’s better if he goes with you, to let him be a reminder of this place and…of me.”

Her breath was caught in her throat at those words, nothing could ever make her forget all that he had done for her. “Are you sure?” Pomni asked, scratching behind Motley’s ears.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” he bent his knees to be eye level with the kitten. “Listen here bud, you’ve got an important mission. In case Pomni gets into trouble, I want you to protect her. If you need backup, you know where to find me. Understand?”

Mew

Motley lifted his paw, it hit Jax directly on the nose.

“Good,” Jax straightened his back, “So I guess this is my final goodbye.”

Pomni bit her lip, reaching up to kiss Jax’s cheek one last time, “Thank you for reminding me how magical life can be.”

Jax’s breath hitched. He could barely recover from her hands, how could he recover from her lips?! She gave him a tiny grin, that jester was going to be the death of him, “You’re welcome Pomni.”

With that, she curtsied once more before running back to the carriage and hopping inside. There was a call from Kaufmo upfront as he pulled on the reins connected to the horses on front, giving them the command to walk as the guards followed on their own horses.

Jax watched as the carriage was pulled further away from him. And further, and further, and further. Then, it was gone. Pomni was gone.

He sighed, lifting his feet and going back into the castle. He didn’t retreat to his room or to his studies though. In fact, hours after the circus had left, he had been pacing back in forth in the throne room, his arms crossed behind his back while the prince was deep in thought. It caused the staff to alert the king and queen at once, leaving the royals to watch their son as he continued to pace.

“Oh the poor boy,” Queenie cooed as she peered through the crack of the door, “Pomni must have left quite the impact.”

“Tell me about it,” Kinger agreed, “I’m fairly certain that his brain has never worked that hard in its life.”

“Shush,” Queenie whacked him lightly on the shoulder, “This is a good thing. It’s not the bad type of thinking he’s having.”

“Then what exactly is on his mind then?” Kinger titled his head to the side.

“Well there’s only one way to find out,” she took her husband’s hand leading him into the throne room. Jax didn’t even notice them come in, still pacing back and forth as his mind kept storming. “What are you thinking about darling?”

The prince let out a yelp, jumping a few feet before facing his parents with a hand to his heart, “You have to stop sneaking up on me like that!”

“I apologise, but you’ve been so caught up in your head for the past few hours,” Queenie told him, her brows furrowing with concern, “We were worried.”

“Please,” Kinger went up to his son, placing a hand on his shoulder, “Tell us what’s on your mind.”

“Well I…,” Jax sighed, clenching and opening his fists, feeling slightly anxious for what he was going to say next. He hadn’t said or done anything that he was thinking about right now, only hoping that it was the right thing to say and do. “I’ve been having a lot of perspective for the past few weeks, about my place in the world and my role as prince. Even since I was young, I was told that I didn’t belong, that I never deserved my title and I started to believe it. I pitied myself for so long that it blinded me to the potential that I had for myself and for the people of my kingdom. When Pomni came into my life, it opened my eyes to see how fortunate I actually am and what I can be able to do. Knowing what she went through, it made me realise just how privileged and lucky I am, and how I’m able to use my power do help people like her. The nobles were wrong about me, wrong about my dreams being too childish, there is nothing childish about wanting better in this kingdom.”

He took a deep breath before continuing, “That’s why I wanna open a home, a home for people who need to seek shelter if they don’t have it, whether they are from our kingdom or somewhere else. To protect them and give them a life until they can stand on their feet again. I want to give them the safety and security that they were denied. I know that I’m able to do this, I want to do this. I am worth the title of Prince and Heir of Laphria.”

Both Queenie and Kinger were speechless, never before had they heard their son speak with the most graceful confidence. This wasn’t like the times when he spoke with arrogance, no, nothing that he had said held no vanity or selfishness. For the first time, he was speaking like a true prince. “That’s a wonderful idea Jax,” Kinger beamed, sharing a pleased look with his wife, “And you doubted that you’d be a good king.”

“Look at my baby growing up,” Queenie cupped his cheeks in her hands, pressing little kisses to his forehead and cheeks as the rabbit flushed.

“M-mom!” he tried not to grin at the attention, but his wagging tail gave him away.

Mew

He froze at a familiar meow, facing the window when he heard something scratching at it. There was a small little blob on the other side, is that? Jax opened the window, Motley immediately jumping into his arms. “Woah, woah buddy what are you doing here?” he checked him over, his front little paw was bruised as the poor thing was shaking, “What happened?”

The doors of the throne room slammed open, two guards panting and bleeding as they staggered through. “Oh goodness! Someone assist them and get them some water!” Queenie demanded to the nearby maids, the royals and servants rushing over to them. They were led to one of the nearby sitting rooms, urged to sit down and drink until they could get their energy back to speak. One of the servants had brought an ice pack for Motley, Jax immediately took it and held it to his paw while another servant wrapped his paw.

“Easy buddy,” he whispered to the kitten, still trembling in fear. “You’re okay.”

“Don’t force yourself,” Kinger instructed when one of the guards tried to begin speaking, “Tell us what happened at your own pace.”

“We…ugh…we were leading the circus through the forest, there was no sign of danger so far,” the guard began to describe the scene. “But they appeared out of nowhere. We tried to fight back but they were too strong, as though they were having some assistance.”

“What are you talking about? Who attacked you?” Jax was starting to panic. The circus had been promised safe travel and if anything happened to them…he didn’t want to imagine it.

“Caine,” the guard continued, “He and his men jumped out and attacked us. We had the upper hand but then there was this red mist and…” he trailed off, his pupils shrinking as he remembered the horrors of what his mind had deceived him with.

“Easy, easy,” the queen soothed him. “The circus, are they alright?”

“We don’t know,” the second guard spoke up, “We were lucky enough to escape to come back and warn you, but…”

“But? But what?!” Jax raised his voice, he didn’t mean to but fear was rushing through is veins. If anything happened to-

“Pomni,” the guard said, making Jax’s heart stop. “Before we escaped, Caine took Pomni.”

Song Credit: Anything, Anything, Anything by Madds Buckley

[marshallpupfan]

Hopefully this isn't too weird or invasive a question, but I'm curious what draws you to Paw Patrol as an older fan, and also what your experience has been like in the fandom and as a collector? (I'm assuming you're an older fan and probably close to my age from the non-Paw Patrol media you share haha).

I am indeed one of its older fans, and I can think up a few reasons that keeps drawing me to it.

One I can say right away is the fact I have a big love for canines, thus I tend to gravitate towards anything with dogs (and wolves, depending on if they're heroes or villains). They make up plenty of my favorites characters, as some of you seen in one of my previous Asks, and I generally tend to enjoy things more when they're involved (a friend recently recommended an older game to me, which I enjoyed all the more because you got to travel around with your trusty dog).

Funnily enough, not too long ago, I took an interest in the Asterix and Obelix franchise because of its dog character, Dogmatix... and I was quite thrilled when I heard he was getting his own spinoff cartoon! Of course, it was only available in French at the time, but much to my luck, the first half of season one got dubbed in English and [officially] posted on Youtube, free to watch! I gave it a go, and I thought it was pretty good! If anyone's curious, click this link to check it out. And yes, this might've been a thinly-veiled attempt to talk about this cartoon somewhere, since there aren't many English-speaking fans. lol

Arquebus/Musketix is the best character.

But yeah, the pups are one of my biggest draws to PAW Patrol, and unlike some fans, I rather like it when other pups get added to the cast. Boomer and Claw both certainly helped renew some of my interest in the franchise, particularly during a time in which I felt things were going downhill. Hey, I just love dogs!

Obviously, Marshall's easily my biggest draw to PAW Patrol. I'll admit, I tend to take a far bigger interest in an episode when he actually gets some good attention... and it's why my interests start to wane when he doesn't. The dude's legit my #1 favorite animated character, so I suppose it's no surprise to hear I often tune in specifically for him. That's not to say I don't get enjoyment from the other pups, but I'm just so crazy about that spotted pup!

Another aspect that draws me to PAW Patrol is just how fun it tends to be (or used to be, but the modern seasons still have their moments). I don't want to go too deep into this because I don't want things to get too serious, but let's just say... life can be quite rough anymore, and it never seems to get much better. I often look for something that can help me escape that for a while, even if it's just for a half hour at a time. I found that PAW Patrol does that for me. It's cute, colorful, fun, doesn't try to be complex, and by the end, everything turns out okay. And if I need cheering up after a bad day, a certainly clumsy, spotted pup often always puts a smile on my face. Some days, I need that.

----

As for my experiences with the fandom, I'd say it's been largely positive. I do tend to meet a lot of friendly people, many of which tend to be supportive and/or cheerful when I need it, and I generally enjoy interacting with most of them right back! I certainly don't regret being a part of it for the last five years or so.

With that said, I've had encounters that certainly weren't pleasant. I think everyone knows about my copycat by this point, so no need to retread that old ground. There's one infamous user out there who just seems to hate everything (unless it involves Everest), and he often turns hostile if you don't agree with his opinions. The same dude even tried arguing and verbally attacking those who work on PAW Patrol... including their families, too! Crazy guy. I've also encountered some fans who seem to make stuff up, believe their headcanon to be fact, and then become angry when people don't agree with them. I once had someone tell me Ryder is "gaslighting" Rubble, and... I don't even want to know what that means or why they believe that.

And in-regards to being a collector, the reception I often encounter has been quite positive, too. Most fans really seem to enjoy seeing my collection, even if it's just out of curiosity to see just how much merchandise they made of one single pup. I still get compliments on it all the time, from both fans and non-fans of Marshall, and I've even seen other folks who just think it's legit cool.

Surprisingly, I've only had one negative encounter so far, and it was, believe it or not, from someone who used to be a fan of PAW Patrol. She became one of those folks who encountered bad users, got tired of them, and then decided every fan must be awful... and of course, she tore into me because I "talk too much" about Marshall and deemed me a "freak" for collecting so much merchandise. Most of what she said was largely laced with swears and insults, and I'm sure she believes she put me in my place or something... though in truth, I was laughing at most of her replies. Why she felt the need to throw such a temper tantrum on me, I'll never know, but she didn't succeed in even the slightest to discourage me or anything. lol

[givemethelovebitxx]

daily recap! i think last week's recap got a little long.. too long if you ask me. i just can't help it, i have so much to say! even for today, i've written a ton and a large portion is just about the thoughts i've been having, not about the day itself.. all that being said, i think i'll be switching to daily recaps for now. or maybe i'll try alternating until i find what feels right.

monday 250602 recap

got accused of being a catfish on here again. lol. i'm not sure why i replied this time.. the rage bait got me! i like posting my pictures that won't make the cut for my instagram but the dms roll in when i do. i'm not here for connections or to chat. i've responded to a few people out of boredom, especially those who have complimented my writing. but mostly, i'm just here to share my thoughts in peace.

i think i'm going to start watching the righteous gemstones. i had never heard of it before but brenda had it on while i was painting her nails. in between curing her polish, it totally caught my attention. it has four seasons which might be a good thing for me to get into. just enough exposition to keep my brain occupied for the time being.

if i do end up watching it, and enjoying it hopefully, don't be surprised if i end up making posts talking about it on here. it's a few years old so there will be spoilers. just a notice in advance lol. i'm trying to break out of my rewatcher habit but it's hard. new things require too much energy.

that said, i'm thinking of seeing friendship again(i am aware i just contradicted myself). the first time i saw it, i was kind of distracted at times. no particular reason.. definitely not because of a certain person who happened to be sitting right next to me... part of me wants to experience it again without the mental link but the closest theatre is still 45 minutes away. i'm not sure the drive(and gas) is worth it for one film that i already saw not even two weeks ago.

i'm still longing and i am fully aware i need to let it go. writing about it has helped tremendously. but i can't help but be reminded of him by everything. there was too many things in common, even dumb little stuff. liking the same side of the bed, hell, our rooms were even set up similarly. like how stupid is that? hate those dumb coincidences. ts pmo lmao

lowkey, i hope i'm clouding up his thoughts the way he is mine. i'm just worried they might rain on me. the worst part is knowing that he likely isn't. it was a clean and easy cut for him. meanwhile, i'm just here. left behind like a sad puppy. genuinely i hope he's living his best and unbothered life. i mean that with sincerity.

i'm telling myself this outcome was and is for the best. at least until i believe the words coming out of my mouth. i should have made him practice some patience. i would have made it worth all the waiting.

my eyelids were so heavy this morning. i'm just experiencing this constant fog of exhaustion that's been lingering around me. my brain has got to be wearing my body down. mental exhaustion bleeding into the physical.

the first thing i did was open youtube and started catching up on life plus cindy's newer vlog about celebrating her divorce at a theme park. i'm glad she came back to youtube despite my love hate relationship i have for her. her videos are exactly what i need right now. but of course while i'm watching, my mind is wandering again. knock it off omfg. it's been long enough, no? surely he shouldn't still be in the back of my mind taking up so much space. like a damn cockroach.. refusing to die.

despite the way i've been feeling, i'm glad we aren't talking anymore(if he reached out i would probably rescind that though lol!). i think it'd be beyond embarrassing if he ever saw my posts. realizing how often he's here.. rent free in my mind.

i keep mixing up dates. forgetting things i literally just told myself to remember. thought i had work this morning, it's actually tomorrow. my head has been a clutter drawer. it's not the worst thing. now i have the day to myself. going to spend it cleaning up my room. hopefully clearing the physical mess will take a load off the mental mess.

jp and i made plans for saturday. my end is an hour and a half drive.. regardless i'm excited. i'm hoping nothing comes up last minute since i definitely need connection, especially from a long time friend. he's been kind and supportive lately, not that he hasn't always been that way prior. it just means extra right now. i think we are going to round1. my last time there was... something.. so i'm hoping this time is better. apparently i told him that there's a japanese restaurant nearby. concord maybe? i have no recollection of saying that though. how many times do i need to say my head has been anywhere else?

i'd love to plan a trip to six flags with him. he's close by so it's kind of perfect. i'm strapped for cash right now so it might have to be pushed back later this summer, or maybe even in the fall would be fun.

i'm running on fumes. my mom pointed out that i hadn't pulled my car far enough into the garage and that the door was dangerously close to hitting my trunk. that's never been an issue before, i've always been diligent. i'm not sure how many times i've said my head is displaced but i'll say it again.

i just sat thinking about the entire situation again. i'm such a bad overthinker and he knew that too. that's what makes it seem so cruel. like he designed this outcome to torment me and make me pick apart every interaction. blocking everywhere without a word is intense. i'm kind of spiraling trying to figure out what i did that was so awful and deserving of this treatment. am i really that terrible?

i thought we were fine? at least that's the impression i was given. he invited me to stay longer - i only left because i had work the next day. we made plans for dinner two days later and to hang out the day after as well. how do you go from that to absolutely nothing?

it has me thinking there was someone else. a recent ex or something. or maybe he met someone more attractive and cooler or whatever he was looking for that i didn't possess. i'm not nonchalant lol. it's hard not to take it personally. maybe he got scared, agreed to something he didn't mean again. the worst truth would be better than this silent treatment. just closure so i can rest. so i can move on without this being my roman empire. i just know moving forward, every time i try to date, this is going to be a worry of mine. even when it no longer hurts, it'll still keep me up thinking what went wrong. speculating the cause whether it's on him or i.

i feel for my friends who have kept up with the things i've posted thus far. surely you're all tired of me writing about this. thinking i need to move on. i will in due time. i'm just not ready yet. if i suppress my feelings, they'll only come back tenfold.

[dracrownian]

Alright, PT, gun to your head, here's some questions for the ask meme-

6, 11 (AkAm), 12, 13, 16, 18, 19, as many of those as you'd like, gogogogogo

Oh no, there's a gun to my head. I guess I'll have to answer all of them then! for the ask meme [ here ].

6. Show us a bit of a WIP!

Okay, so. I am going to share some of a WIP, but I'll add it in a separate post and then link it here when I do (and make a note on that post as well), because it'll be longer than I'd like to make this post. And also I have to find one that I haven't either already posted bits of here/haven't shown you elsewhere/etc. Because I figured it should be something new (to you, not new to me).

(It's also going to be several hours from now, probably, because of irl reasons and because everything I have saved on this pc you've already seen. I think.)

Edit: the WIP is [ here ]! And hopefully editing this post doesn't completely break the formatting, tumblr.

11. What's your favourite piece of fanart for [akam]?

Picking a favorite is impossible, so I'm just gonna link a bunch that I like.

Akai's burning desire for Rei. Honesty. soft. (this one is from a deactivated account, so I just linked to my reblog of it) Rei smiling, god it's so cute. average akam interaction. okay I lied, this one is my favorite I think. the vibes are perfect.

Hopefully the links work and I didn't mess them up. If I did, let me know and I'll figure it out.

12. What's the funniest or craziest AU idea you've ever come up with?

Craziest is probably the yokai au, given all the research I need to do for that one, and the general plot. Super fun though.

Funniest... probably recency bias, because I can't think of many right now, but I am currently very amused by the fake marriage au.

(For those who wouldn't know these because I haven't talked about them here: dragon/yokai au is... hard to explain without giving things away that I'm not ready to give away yet. there's yokai. it started because of the scene where Ran pictures Chihaya with wings, and went completely off the rails from there.

The fake marriage au is akam getting married for a case.)

13. What's a character or ship you haven't written/drawn yet but would like to some day?

Hmm. I don't know. Masumi x Momiji might be a fun one to write. I have no plans for it currently, though. I'm not currently setting out to write anything other than AkAm, and the occasional HiroRei.

16. Do people irl know you participate in fandom?

Yes. My sister, who got me back into DetCo after a long break from it, is the sounding board for a lot of just "wouldn't this be funny if..." discussion, and she's aware that I write fanfic and talk to people online about it.

Aside from her, I have at least one active tumblr mutual I've met irl. (And at least one that I'm pretty sure is inactive on tumblr, but I talk to elsewhere. There might be more, but my memory is bad today.)

18. Type [Akai and/or Rei]'s name and tell us what the autocomplete suggests as the next word

So I'm assuming this is the same as predictive text, and I had to struggle to remember how to turn it back on because I don't use it. And then it just gave me boring answers as the "next" word (type the name, then space, and then it just gives me "is") for both.

Instead, I started typing the name to see what it would suggest that I'm trying to type. And I did a couple variations for fun.

Rei -> Reign Shuuichi -> Shuukichi Furuya Rei -> Furuya Reiterated Akai Shuuichi -> literally no response here. Bourbon -> Bourbons Rye -> Rye's Amuro -> Amuro's Okiya -> Okiya's

Okay so those last few weren't fun. Akai turning into his brother amused me, though. And Demon Lord Rei has taken over.

19. What's your favourite thing about [fandom] (the people in it, not the media you're all enjoying together)?

All the fun brainstorming, and the suffering together because of whatever Gosho's done now, and just. The general interactions. Idk, that feels like a bad answer, but I've just been really enjoying being back in fandom and actually participating and making stuff. I hadn't felt comfortable sharing any of my writing with anyone in over a decade, and now suddenly I've posted two fics on AO3 this year alone, and I'm constantly either writing or thinking about writing, and it's because I'm enjoying the fandom interactions so much. <3

[painterofhorizons]

Some incoherent rambling about tracing in art under the cut. And I'm not trying to start a fight on this, so depending on your own stand about this, just go ahead and don't read it.

I'm struggling a lot with seeing art that is clearly traced.

And I don't speak about the obvious "don't do that" thing of tracing someone else's art, which we hopefully can agree on that nope, don't be an asshole and don't trace someone else's art.

I mean seing art that is, let's say, fanart that is clearly traced from a photo. (And let's be hopeful and say it's a traced stock photo that was initially created for being used in any way, not like, some celebrity photo or picture from instagram or anything that was not created as a stock image.)

Don't get me wrong. I firmly want people to have fun with their hobbies. And my resentment about this topic definitely originates both in

a) my own frustrated relationship to drawing (aka used to draw a lot for 20 years, then fell out of it completely for 15 years, and now has a very difficult time getting back into it because of 15 years of lacking training) and

b) the fact that back in the day there still was a very clear mentality of "do not trace" that people strictly obeyed, or so it felt.

And yes, of course tracing is okay for practice - but the way I was artistically socialized is: you can totally trace - but do not post it, and IF you post it, do link the traced reference. STATE that it is traced. But best keep that to your sketchbook, it's something you did for practice, and you do not show it to anyone, because tracing is morally bad.

And now it feels like you see so much art that is clearly traced, because I know a thing or two about how hard it is to get proportions right, and it is very easy to tell if photographs are the traced basis of a drawing esp depending on the art skill.

It feels like you barely see art anymore where the proportions are off. And no one who is not a complete pro gets every proportion completely right, especially if going for a very realistic art style. Which, in itself, often is a sign for tracing.

And I think the reason it bothers me is that it feels like cheating, like, "back in the day" we had to learn proportions and all the hard way, by, like, looking at stuff and then just fucking up by drawing shit on our own freestyle. Or like drawing a grid on the reference picture and a grid on your own sheet of paper and trying to do it like a puzzle. But back in the just traditional day tracing was much harder anyways. (And yes, "we" means "I", but it also means a general "we".) And it feels like those folks who work the tracing way nowadays take the shortcut, they don't struggle the same we/I did, and it is unfair because of all the struggling you undergo when you do not take the shortcut.

And this sounds absolutely ridiculous, because basically it is saying "if I had to struggle, so do you" - or in a more gentle approach - "I wish I, too, didn't have to struggle so much".

Like, rationally, I would never say that to someone's face. Which is why I don't do it, like, I'm really trying to just ignore it and let folks do their thing. And I know not taking the shortcut gets you a much bigger learning outcome than taking shortcuts. You only learn shit by doing it, and getting proportions right ON YOUR OWN needs you to DO IT ON YOUR OWN.

And it bothers me so much that it bothers me!

But boy. It bothers me so much to see such art, especially when it is not stated that hey, this is a shortcut version of art, because it is traced.

It feels like, idk, betrayel towards art itself, as well as towards other artists. It feels dishonest.

Like, there's no such thing like this in writing! Because if you did that in writing, it is plagiarism, and that gets you shame, and shitstorms, and de-registrations.

And like, usually artists who use reference pictures but do it free hand usually even like/state the use of reference pictures, but those who *trace* don't even say they worked with references. And that feels so frigging wrong to me towards art.

And in the end, all of this is just my inner artist begging for me having fun with art the same way as all those other artists, and as much as those who trace but at least they draw and hopefully enjoy the process, right?

I just desperately want to draw and enjoy it again, just like my first two decades of life.

So yes, in the end, this is me being utterly jealous about folks who have such a relaxed and not-overthinking relationship with art that they see a nice photograph that inspires them and be like "I'm gonna trace this and make it my own and have fun".

This is me wishing I didn't have such high moral standards towards myself and others.

Just take it easy. Relax. Don't care so much.

But I can't. I see traced art that does not have the disclaimer of "oh yeah btw I did use a reference for this and I traced the general proportions" and my brain and my stomach go "wrongwrongwrongMORALFAILUREhowdareyou".

Yeah, this is a rant post that goes in different directions - but it is also an honest question to those of you who also used to feel strongly about the topic of tracing=bad and who learned to take it easier.

How did you do that?

Because no matter how much I try to rationally tell myself: relax, how others treat art is not your business - I still feel sick in my stomach about this matter when it occurs and I cannot help it - but I really wish I could help it.

[mysticsparklewings]

Obscutober 2024 Day 8: Inflorescence 💐

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Inflorescence (n.)

the flowering part of a plant or arrangement of flowers on a stalk; the time and process of budding and unfolding flowers.

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So begins Week 2 of Inktober! 🖋️

I am pretty pleased with today’s art, but my posting time probably says it all: Not everything was coming up roses in the making-of process. 😅

Click the "Keep Reading" and we'll talk about it! ✨

⭐️ Like My Art and Want to see more of it? Here's All My Links! ⭐️

---------- Whew boy Sparklers; If I seem a little "off" or this description comes out a bit short, that's because (to the surprise of absolutely no one) I got a bit of a later start on this mandala than I'd hoped and it also ended up taking longer than I wanted. 😅 Thus I am now very acutely aware that I have much less time to get this description type and everything cross-posted than I'm really comfortable with.

Granted, this isn't the Cinderella-esque race against Midnight that I've very "used to" from Inktobers' past, but in some small ways that almost makes it worse because I know I've technically been doing much better than usual this year and the further I push that "better" envelope, the more anxious I become. 🫠

So let me stop wasting time rambling about that and get to talking about the art!

I think the main reason this one ended up taking so long is because I hyped it up too much—The idea of getting to draw a mandala made of flowers àla Adult Coloring Book-Style was so enticing that I did that thing us artists tend to do sometimes; I got in my head about it being "good enough" and "right" and all that, as if this is somehow the only opportunity I'll ever have to make a flower mandala so it "needed" to be perfect. 🙄

And, in a strange kind of other sense I think I had a little too much confidence going in because I recently spent quite a bit of time drawing intricate flowers in a similar style for a project you Sparklers haven't seen yet but my Ko-fi Members have. [And hopefully you Sparklers will get to see it soon, too, I've just been too busy to squeeze it in yet!] Mostly, I underestimated my own standards for what translating those flower drawing skills into this mandala format would be like. 😅

I also kind of hurt myself in that I decided I really wanted to get roses in here somewhere on top of trying to make sure I got at least one flower that had more obvious stages of blooming (per today's deifnition), rather than all of them being full-bloom. Naturally, I picked the most difficult option of having the roses be said multi-stage flower. 🙃 I'm sure I don't have to tell any of you Sparklers that have attempted to draw them before that roses are among some of the trickier flowers to draw, particularly in a more doodle-y style like this. I have semi-successfully handled roses before, but I think it's been literal years since the last time I drew any. 🫣 [Maybe not, but I don't feel like I have the time to dig through my posts and check to be sure right now!]

You can see that I did manage some results I'm decently happy with in the end, of course, but I probably spent about half of the total time I worked on this mandala on the roses specifically. 😵‍💫

And then of what was left, probably about half of that was spent on the "final" swirling vines that have different little pink flowers on them. Which is to say I think that was the second most challenge part to draw, even though it's one of the more simple elements present.

I could have stopped before adding those final swirls and it probably would've been fine, but the outer corners just felt so empty compared to all the flower and leaf stuff going on elsewhere, particularly the center-most ring. (That's what I get for adding lines to look more like a vague suggestion of roots below the big leaves!) I wanted to fill just a little more space badly.

If I hadn't felt timing ticking down so strongly, I would've definitely bothered to figure out something a little more involved for those swirls, but it just wasn't meant to be today. I couldn't stop thinking about the time and it seemed like every other false start I has either wasn't right or tested my patience too much.

I very nearly put some more sunflower-esque flowers in the corners instead, but I didn't like the idea of looking myself into a more specific color palette in that way and I didn't like the idea of not being able to either "attach" them to the rest of the mandala or the fact that I couldn't think of a way to make them more vine-like on their own. Therefore, the sunflowers sat this one out. [And besides, they already had a small cameo last week!]

The leaves, fortunately, didn't give me much trouble. Those largest leaves that I put down first where probably the most difficult, but only because they were made using a criss-cross line method I observed in some mandala techniques on Pinterest, rather than other more typical ways I go about drawing leaves. They really weren't too bad, though. And I think they were the right choice because they kind of set up a shape foundation that directed a lot of the rest of the mandala.

Likewise, this may have been the easiest color scheme to decide apart from Day 1 because of the leaves. I set up with that green foundation, pushed it to be a little more teal/aqua, and then went with most pink flowers since that's complimentary, but then a soft blue for the...They're sort of lilies-of-the-valley but maybe not exactly. I think the blue I picked is a touch too dark for that, but since I was very sold on this off-white/cream background, I went with the deeper blue so the color would be more obvious.

I will admit I originally wanted to avoid pink or red roses, but I made the outermost flowers pink first, dared to touch the roses with a bit of a darker pink, and promptly threw that plan out the window. I did try to mix a little purple int here so they weren't a super-traditional rose pink, but I think I overblended it so that effect was mostly lost. 😅 But I did stand firmly behind no-red roses, though. Against many fibers in my Alice-in-Wonderland-loving being, but it felt too stereotypical and like a bad fit for the more aqua-green leaves, which I really didn't want to change at that point.

Yesterday and Day 2 are still gunning for my favorite, but this one isn't super far behind despite the choices I maybe would've handled a bit differently if I'd felt like I could afford more time to puzzle over them. If anything, I think this will be my favorite as a coloring page, if I do end up making coloring pages out of these. [Which yes, is an idea I've been toying with—I think I mentioned it on Day 1? Maybe?]

You Sparklers will have to tell me if that sounds like something worth bothering with. 😉

Let's see...I think that's everything I wanted to mention for today, so I should probably be getting on with that cross-posting now; I'll see you Sparklers tomorrow, hopefully at least a little earlier in the evening... 😅 🤞

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See the Prompt List

Artwork  © me, MysticSparklewings

Obscutober Concept Inspired by nikolas_tower

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⭐️ Like My Art and Want to see more of it? Here's All My Links! ⭐️

[captainsophiestark]

Hey guys! So I haven't been on Tumblr like, at all for the past few weeks because of this ask I got:

I'm not gonna lie, I've been pretty much furious since I first read it, and so I decided to take a break from the internet while I worked through my feelings and decided how I wanted to respond to this. If you're reading this at all, please do me a favor and read all the way through this post. It's a little long, but it's also very very very important.

First of all, let's get one thing straight: I will NEVER consider using AI to write my stories or otherwise for about a thousand reasons, two of the big ones being respect for myself and my fellow creators, AND the fact that it "learns" to write stories and spits out responses based off of plagiarized work. Like mine, which was taken and fed into chatgpt without my consent. Using programs like this is not even remotely harmless, and I will never be one of the people putting shit into programs like chatgpt.

Additionally, this is illegal. Beyond the fact that it's ridiculously disrespectful of creators, under US copyright law, the elements of my writing that I created, including characters and scenarios, are my intellectual property. Taking my work and feeding it to the AI without my permission (and no one will EVER have my permission) is a violation of the law and also goes against Tumblr's terms of service.

If you are continuing to use, support, or otherwise feed the AI, seriously educate yourself and stop, or never fucking come near me again.

Right here is a link to a post that includes a legal disclaimer that I'll be putting with all my fics now making people aware that putting my work and my writing into AI programs is not only not okay, it is also illegal. I'm sharing it like this for anyone else who wants to use it too, to educate themselves on the law or otherwise. It's written by a legit lawyer and the sources are cited, so it's not just me screaming into the void.

I've been going back and forth for a while now on what the hell to do about this ask I got, because I absolutely love writing fic and sharing it with all of you. And it doesn't feel right to me that so many of my wonderful readers who have supported me for so long have to deal with the consequences of a few assholes. But I want to write professionally some day, and I am not okay with my voice, style, and words being fed into some machine to be plagiarized by both the people stealing my work and the people running and making money off of programs like chatgpt.

I debated for a while about taking down all my writing and just calling it a day, because as long as it's up I know that it's possible, despite my best efforts to protect my work, that people will still rip it off. However, I truly love writing fic and writing in general, and a big part of that has come from the incredible interactions that I've been able to have with people on here. There's something special about the feeling of sharing a story, and I will not let a minority of assholes ruin that for me or the people who choose to read my work and be good humans about it.

That said, I am going to take a little break from writing. I have no idea how short or long it might be, but right now I'm a little over it all, so I'm going to take a step back from requests and oneshots and everything else for right now. This is hitting in the middle of the Year of Themed Creation and it also came right before an event called Daniel Sousa Appreciation Week, so if you had requests or expectations for those events, I'm sorry. I hope you guys can understand where I'm coming from, and thank you for supporting me as much as you have.

I still plan to be online (I love Tumblr and fully believe it's the only useable social media), I just won't be posting my writing. Hopefully, it'll free up some time for me to do some reading and commenting instead, so I can support my fellow creators!

Tl;dr and a final ask for anyone who read all this: please, please, PLEASE don't feed the AI. Respect your content creators and recognize just how much of what the AI spits out is ripped off of the thoughts, ideas, and words of someone else, often without their permission. Fight for art and the people who make it.

[vintagetvstars]

Submission PSA

Thank you everyone who has already sent in your submissions and to those planning to make submissions! This bracket literally wouldn't exist without your contributions. I started entering submissions into my spreadsheet today so I can keep track of everyone and their propaganda and there were a few submissions that had some mild issues so just wanted to quickly bring those issues up so we can hopefully keep from repeated mistakes in future submissions. First just a reminder that picture and video propaganda need to be from between the years of 1950 and 2004 and somewhat relevant to their vintage television career (for example please don't include things from movies they've done or things from their career pre 1950 or post 2004). I won't catch everything but if something is obviously outside of these guidelines then it won't make it in as propaganda since this tournament is specifically celebrating these stars during their vintage television careers. I just want to keep things focused and simple for this blog which is why I'm sticking with these restrictions for propaganda. As long as people are being polite you are free to add whatever you wish to convince people to vote for your favs in your own reblogs. Secondly there has been some issues with broken links where some suggested poll picture links are not working on my end of things. Luckily for most of these they are for people with multiple submissions so I'm simply moving down the list and using the next suggested poll pic. So if your picture isn't used for the poll pic or included in the propaganda then it's probably because the link you sent didn't work for whatever reason. If that's the case please feel free to reblog it with the picture you wished to include and let me know so I can reblog it here with your additional propaganda as long as it meets our usual propaganda restrictions whenever the polls go up.

Some broken links are for people who only have a single submission so far though. For those I'll try and keep a list of those and post them after submissions close so the people who submitted them can try and send me the picture they wanted included as the poll picture as an ask before the polls go up. Otherwise I'll just have to use whatever I can find and I want to give everyone's favs their best chance.

Thank you all again for the reblogs, likes, follows, and submissions! I'm really enjoying hearing about your favs from your lovely submissions and I can't wait to share them all with everyone!

[chattegeorgiana]

Hey I'm the sasusaku fan reading Kaika Sasei. Thank you for the answer I'm looking forward. By the way, can you link here the written version? You have so many chapters written and I wanna know more before reading the manga.

I was hoping you could pick up fan's ideas, wish you could check out inosakutema they're a great trio though. I see that you plan to stay true to Kishimoto and I can pick up on the Temari situation with Sakura in Suna. (Hope it's the clinic!!).

Speaking of the clinic I can't wait to see your version of it. Boruto leaves me wanting for some more head of medical department Sakura. It's so simplified and boring, she's your average healer only when plot needs her and it's so boring only the same jutsu. It's like she ain't the world's strongest kunoichi and its best medical ninja.

I might be a loyal sasusaku but I'm not too hostile on Karin, I think she's really useful as a sensor and her sensory is the best in the world, I don't get how people downplay them. Hopefully you can find a spot for her in Konoha as their leader of Barrier.

I was sad when you didn't give any details about Hanabi. Neji was my favorite character and the only escape to his absence I could find is Hanabi, she's the best in Boruto all things considered (the story is trash). If you follow Kishimoto writing then I can rest assured she will lead her clan like I've been waiting for them to show already.

Hi there! Welcome back! 🤗

So, I have multiple formats for the written version.

I have it pretty much everywhere: my blog in storybook format on chatte-georgiana.com

This post here has a table of contents with all of them: https://chatte-georgiana.com/2020/10/25/kaika-saisei-naruto-au-after-the-war-sakura-haruno-centric/

Then, if you want, depending on what you’re most used to I have it on:

FFnet: https://m.fanfiction.net/s/13771214/1/Kaika-Saisei (this one for some reason ruined some of the formatting and no matter what I try it won’t save the modificatiosn)

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28149138/chapters/68971716

Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/1063652674-kaika-saisei-chapter-1-every-end-is-a-new

So, depending on what you like most, pick your favorite. 😁

Now to the next part of your question, regarding fan ideas and whatnot… to be honest I try to stay as far away as possible from that because at the end of the day this is the vision I have over her development & I’m writing it based on old theories I had regarding her. Which ironically came true partially and didn’t come true at the same time. It’s like Schroedinger’s cat situation lol.

From what you’re telling me there’s plenty of that in the original series though? Like I said, I’m trying my best to stay as far away from it, although I will have a certain reference to it at some point in the story. But that’ll come when it’ll come and that’s all I’m going to say about it cuz I don’t want to spoil. 😁

Of course there might be certain similarities to original due to the fact that certain things have been discussed in the fandom prior to the ending, so what the publisher did was take those ideas and put them into the actual story, lol. It’s more than clear at this point they’re scanning the fandom for ideas. But anyway, moving in from that….

As for the writing, yeah, I’m trying to stay as close as possible to Kishimoto’s writing though. I’m sure you’ll enjoy the Sakura/Temari thing I have in mind because in a way it’s not very far from what you’re telling me, it’s just that it’s maybe a different angle, let’s say.

As for the clinic, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it purely from the angle of Sakura being highly underutilized in OG material.

Like trust me, I tried giving Boruto a chance even if I was mad at the ending. I said ok, if the writing is good then I’ll give it a chance because at the end of the day, I can appreciate something good even if it’s not my preferred taste. But sadly, the way the franchise treats her it’s just lamentable, imo.

Medical ninjutsu used to be so much fun & intricate, but OG material just stuck to its ever used green aura type of thing and that’s it.

That’s precisely why in Kaika I did my best to try and give it the respect it deserves. Ofc, I might not do it 100% okay either, but at least I’ll try my best to go past the green glow. 🤷‍♀️

As for Karin, buckle up and think if this is going to be or not an impediment to you because as I said, this is going to be SK story in the end as well, not just NS. As I’ve said, I’m a big fan of the symbolism & mirroring Kishi did with them, so I’m planning on playing that out in Kaika as well.

I can understand how that might not be someone’s cup of tea, but I’ve always been real about what this story will be in terms of pairings.

As for her & Konoha sensory, well, I have let’s say other plans. At the moment Karin is very well focused on discovering more about her Uzumaki roots. And that’s all I will say for now. 👀

As for Hanabi, sorry, must’ve escaped my mind. In Kaika she’s currently the heiress of the Hyuga and as you’ll see from the written version, there’s some subplot involving her, a treasured Hyuga secret & the complications of being the heiress & having access to such a secret and trying to mend the relationship with her sister. But anyway, read the written version and you’ll see for yourself.

And as I said, in Kaika, Neji Hyuga will be brought back to the cast. 👀

As for the details of how that’ll happen, all I can say is just to follow the story. 👀🤭

Anyway, thanks once again for your interest in Kaika. Highly appreciated! 🙏 Hope you enjoy the written version! 😊