#how comfortable sam is around cas despite the... everything. makes me so insane

[aliusfrater]

THE a4a (autism 4 autism) episode

[monstermoviedean]

i so so get your feelings about the michael arc as a whole, just spilling some added thoughts here, feel free to ignore, i just wanted to make it an ask so this mess wouldn't be an rb

the michael arc has a whole other layer of unfairness to me because it follows so much of the same plot threads as sam's issues with lucifer in season 4-5 and then hurts dean in a way they never hurt sam. when sam was panicked over what being lucifer's vessel meant and running around on cases, dean supports him (despite getting no sympathy when michael is also revealed). in s14 however sam not only, obviously, actively brings up dean's very valid fears like they're just him abandoning family (sammy, honey, look at your track record) and works behind his back with others. sam in the cage = dean in the malak box. but dean trusted sam to let him go, no matter how much it killed him. sam frames dean doing the exact same thing as another issue of trust. also also also if i remember right, sam wasn't even possesed by lucifer as long as dean and cas were by the archangels!!! not dismissing his cage trauma ofc, but there is a very clear level of repression that sam is trying to keep concerning everything, which also leads him making some bullheaded statements to dean.

like it's insane how they speedran the archangel vessel trauma from s4-s5 with michael, but proceeded to have no aftermath resolution for any of it. nor did they have sam really support and dare i say, comfort, dean, the way the reverse happened. (and obviously dean made his own mistakes in s4-s5 with sam, but the ratio is completely different). anyways, just found the repeated themes interesting and thought you might too

oh this is soooooo tasty thank you so much!!! i especially love it when people send me stuff like this that helps me connect dots. i hadn't connected the dots on how much of a speedrun this is! but holy crap. it really is!

they spend almost all of season 5 working on the lucifer + michael vessel buildup, and then most of season 6 and part of season 7 deals with the aftermath of sam's decision to say yes. to be clear, i don't have any issue with that! it makes sense in context and a lot of it is well-done. and i certainly don't begrudge the show for highlighting sam's feelings about being lucifer's vessel. but even if we round down, even if we say it's just one season of sam having this vessel arc, that's still way, way more than dean got.

i don't want this to sound like "wah sam got more screen time than dean" because that's absolutely not my issue. my issue is that both in their universe and in our universe, sam and dean can have the same exact problem and their problems can be assigned different levels of weight and attention. is this 100% true 100% of the time? no, of course not. but when it comes to being a vessel, the effects on sam are highlighted. the effects on dean are downplayed.

like you said - even in s5 dean barely gets to react to being michael's vessel. he gets one episode (05x18) to really consider it and we all know how that goes for him. and in s13-14 it's just as minimized. dean gets less than 5 minutes in 13x23 to concoct his plan. this isn't something he's agonized over. this isn't something that is foreshadowed even a little bit. and then dean is possessed for an unknown length of time. in my opinion, it was probably a few months.

that's a huge deal. that is a HUGE deal. even if he's possessed for the minimum amount of time necessitated by the episodes, it's still probably a month. i don't remember how long sam was possessed for in 05x22, but i'm pretty sure it was less than a month.

is length of time the only thing that matters here? nope! definitely not! in no way do i mean to suggest that dean automatically had it worse than sam simply because he was possessed for longer. as you point out, the cage.

but this brings me to one of my biggest issues with the whole arc: sam not showing a single speck of empathy for dean. as you noted - sam is going through it, he is feeling emotions and recalling memories that he has repressed, and i understand why those could come out in ways that are less than healthy. totally get it. but it is still just downright awful to watch sam talk to dean the way he does, especially knowing sam has been exactly where dean was.

dean doesn't do a perfect job handling sam being lucifer's vessel. no doubt. i don't remember it that well at this point; it's been a while since i've seen season 5. but look at what he says to sam when sam has made up his mind to say yes:

SAM: You're gonna let me say yes? DEAN: No. That's the thing. It's not on me to let you do anything. You're a grown – well, overgrown – man. If this is what you want, I'll back your play. SAM: That's the last thing I thought you'd ever say. DEAN: Might be. I'm not gonna lie to you, though. It goes against every fiber I got. I mean, truth is… You know, watching out for you… it's kinda been my job, you know? But more than that, it's… it's kinda who I am. You're not a kid anymore, Sam, and I can't keep treating you like one. Maybe I got to grow up a little, too. I don't know if we got a snowball's chance. But… But I do know that if anybody can do it… it's you. SAM: Thank you.

dean says it's not up to him to decide for sam, and while he doesn't necessarily like his decision, he respects it. and he wants sam to know that. he goes out of his way to comfort sam and to build him up, to support him. and it's a shocking contrast to what sam says when dean tells him about the ma'lak box plan. it's even more shocking when compared to sam trying to talk dean out of it.

does sam need to be 100% supportive and kind all the time? nope! but the way he goes about this is just so incredibly self-centered and so actively harmful to dean. as you mentioned - he frames it as dean abandoning his family. he also suggests dean is "giving up," "quitting," refusing to believe in/trust sam. i yelled about this yesterday but sam is, whether intentionally or not, picking at all of dean's worst fears while dean is facing down another worst fear and feeling shame for feeling fear. sam says and does some pretty awful things and dean does not get to respond to any of it. he just moves on. it's like it's not his story so it doesn't matter what he feels or how he's treated.

and to know that all of this gets heaped on dean - guilt for saying yes, guilt for letting michael out, guilt for "leaving the door open," guilt for what michael did, guilt for not being "strong enough" to keep him contained, guilt for "abandoning" sam, plus the very VERY real trauma of being possessed for a long stretch of time, plus what's about to happen to mary and jack - to know all of this happens back-to-back-to-back? that's hard enough. but to not even let him react to any of it? to force him to keep going as if this is all business as usual and he should just suck it up? so much worse.

and i'm just going to go ahead and assume sam never apologizes for any of it. i may be wrong. please correct me if i'm wrong.

[googledocsdyke]

Do you have any thoughts/recommended texts for Cas analysis? I genuinely love the dean gender studies and I just wanna know what people might apply to Cas.

yes absolutely!! while dean studies is my first love i also deeply love cas analysis (casnalysis?) and wanna strive to do more of it. here’s some stuff off the top of my head:

1. gender, sexuality, heavenly embodiment

this is much more theological and less psychological than dean’s whole Deal because there’s so much fascinating stuff around how the angels in general experience express and conceptualise gender (@autisticandroids has a good post about angel gender & lily sunder has some regrets) but for cas in particular there’s this fascinating kind of collective fandom agreement (which i DO also agree with) that cas’ own gender kind of is gay man, that he actively chose gay manhood, but also that he’s kind of..... lacking the Insane Genderishness that dean exhibits at all times, even though he actively chose to engage in male gendering and became so comfortable housed Within Jimmy that he, as some post i saw the other day that i can’t find anymore said, “became his own body” when jimmy died. 

like on the one hand there’s an almost-canonical transness to the whole process but it also never feels fully written-into because 1) the supernatural writers for all their insanity are sometimes very boring and *most* of the time only feel interested in narratively expressing angels As Their Vessels anyways and just like leaving convenient spaces around these questions (boldest thing they ever did was hot girl cas which i WISH i had the range to unpack) 2) there’s a vague inevitabilist shrug to the whole thing since they obviously weren’t gonna recast misha collins (though they HAVE tried to get rid of him) and 3) something amorphous about cas’ entire..... personhood? makes him Empty Of Gender as a contrast to dean’s Full Of Gender (i believe it was @deanwinchestergender who said this) and like is it just the juxtaposition to dean/jensen’s whole insane Deal? or something else? 

like he actively chooses the terms of his own embodiment and yet narratively it feels like a shrug. and we’re all like “well obviously even though he’s a celestial being he was always a gay man” and like WHY. i love it idk idk much to think about! and yeah just in general the theological questions of possession and cas genuinely Becoming a man as he iterates himself consciously towards humanity it almost feels like. by doing the most boring things possible with his gender they made it interesting? idk if that makes sense.

2. discipline, free will, metanarratives

cas is like a tool (“i am not a hammer, as you say”) held in constant discipline and surveillance by the system that enmeshes him and it’s really, really fascinating to watch the way the angels hold each other to conformity. especially pre-god they kind of produce each other as foucauldian disciplinary subjects (which i posted about here) in perpetual visibility through angel radio, generating their own and each other’s conformity rather than being directly ruled through like a single centralised source of power. only the spectre of a god. and obviously cas’ whole thing is that he has ALWAYS disobeyed and the narrative affords him this psychological interiority never given to the foucauldian subject, an internal will and desire for freedom in a way that fits more with the liberal subject (super roughly and not with the same pro-capitalist implications but he has this internal drive for self-liberation. 

and that’s also where the metanarrative comes in ofc! i think it was @dykecas who said that cas is a real person written by people who hate him, and there’s this crack in the narrative (mirroring the crack in his chassis) where cas gets in, over and over, despite all the order imposed by the show’s authorfathergod. like we’ve all seen the analysis about how it was Never supposed to be this way they DID try to fire misha collins in 2012 and yet this gay man literally cannot be stopped! i think actually his appearance in scoobynatural is a neat little distillation of this — he drops into this animated world originally with a singular purpose (Save Sam And Dean) the same way he dropped into lazarus rising with a single 3-episode arc (Save Dean). huge hammer behaviour. his “utility” diminishes within the narrative (he finds that he can’t fly in the scooby doo universe) and so he is no longer a tool/means to an end that salvation moves Through. and in the process (and huge creds to @lesbianyuugi for this) he does something ENTIRELY unrelated to his original cas-as-tool aim, and learns, like, the meaning of laughter from shaggy and scooby. WHICH brings me onto the third point

3. love, queer kinship, family-making

HE’S GAY AND HE’S A DAD! i feel like a lot of tumblr throws around the term “found family” in a very flat and tropey way (which is fine it’s cute and fun no matter what!) but like . GOD there’s so much specific stuff going on here. like the way that cas (unintentionally) obliterates the midwestern white christian nuclear family (made incarnate in the novaks) which like could be uniformly portrayed as an act of deep malice and villainy but instead grows to serve as a surrogate (if imperfect/complex, but DEEPLY loving) father figure for the gay daughter who has now escaped that nuclear family/seen it destroyed depending on how you read it? like he remasters the entire concept of fatherhood and it’s a very interesting (if DEEPLY) unintentional subversion of the homewrecking non-nuclear gay trope. cas is so good because his character arc doesn’t say “look, gay people can be normal and have perfect settled families just like you” it says “gay people DON’T have normal settled families actually and they are full of love anyways! or Because of the abnormalcy itself!) 

to cite ziz lesbianyuugi again he DOES queer fatherhood in his parenting of jack particularly because it really is one of the ONLY parent-child relationships in the show that breaks the incessant cycle of abuse and control and cold indifference perpetuated by the authorfathergod (a cycle reified in 15x20 lol). like god’s treatment of cas and his siblings mirrors john’s treatment of sam and dean (particularly dean) mirrors victor’s treatment of krissy and her crew mirrors dean’s later treatment of jack. there is a CONSTANT reiteration of the story of authorfathergod (often a father tightly entwined in biological kinship) treating a child as a mechanism or a tool or a means to an end. and cas looks at ALL that he has suffered and all that he is ever known and chooses constantly to reject it with every piece of love he expresses for his child. and not to sound like the kind of academic people make fun of on twitter but there is an INHERENT queerness to that. gay love will pierce through [the veil of death/the thick silence of abuse/the mechanism of godly control/hegemonic american masculinity] and save the day

anyways here are some very haphazard recs on everything above for further reading:

angels in america (tony kushner)

histrionics of the pulpit: trans tonalities of religious enthusiasm

the public universal friend: religious enthusiasm in revolutionary america

discipline and punish (michel foucault)

friendship as a way of life (michel foucault)

the genesis of blame (recommended by @pietacastiel who has GREAT theology content in general

all about love (bell hooks)

the chapter “when hated characters talk back” in anti-fandom: dislike and hate in the digital age (is actually explicitly about cas)

also cannot recommend enough following the ppl i tagged above!! most of the unlinked stuff is available through http://libgen.li/ and bookshop is a good alternative to amazon if ur american and want physical copies

[impala-dreamer]

Two Weeks Notice - Day Six

~With the world practicing self-isolation, Y/N and Dean break all the rules of social distancing and common decency as they explore an empty bunker and use the time alone to their playful advantage…~ 

Dean x Reader

1,947 Words

Warnings: NSFW. Fluffy, Costumed Smut.

Two Weeks Notice Masterlist ~ My Masterlist ~ Become A Patreon ~ My Original Works on Amazon

Dean lay back in bed, memory foam mattress forming perfectly around his aching hips. He’d never admit it in a thousand years, but Y/N’s Fuck-Fest 2020 was making him a bit sore around the joints. Not that he was complaining. He was enjoying the ever-loving hell out of it, and her. There was something very relaxing about doing whatever you wanted with no fear of someone else- Sam - walking in on you at the wrong moment. Hell, he was even considering not wearing pants for the rest of the week.

That and Y/N seemed so open to play at whatever popped into his head. He was certain the whole vampire thing wouldn’t go down well, but she leapt at the chance and played it out perfectly. They were exploring each other and the bunker and it was magical. He had almost forgotten that the outside world was in chaos and that Chuck was breathing down their necks.

Almost.

Alone for a moment, he fluffed up the pillow behind him and texted his brother.

‘How’s it going up there?’

As always, Sam answered quickly. ‘Fine. A little bored stuck in the house, but we’re getting by. How’s Y/N?’

‘Oh, she’s doin reeeallll good.’

Dean could picture the look of disgust on Sam’s face.

‘Make sure you guys are washing your hands and… disinfecting the sheets.’

Dean laughed at the screen. ‘I don’t think the sheets are the problem…’

‘Gross. Clean up before I get back, please.’

‘You got it. Hey Sammy- Stay safe up there, OK?’

‘Obviously…. You too.’

As much fun as he was having, he did miss Sam, and Jody, and the girls, and Cas.

“Ahem.”

Y/N’s call to attention did just that, shoving away any lamenting thoughts from Dean’s mind and focusing his eyes on the doorway. The door was open and under the frame stood Y/N, wrapped in a familiar tan trench coat, the sash pulled tight around her waist.

Dean’s jaw dropped.

“Hey there, sexy,” she greeted, posing for him, one bare knee popping out from the folds of the coat.

He swallowed hard, trying to wrap his head around the intensely arousing sight before him. “Hey yourself,” he whispered back, tripping over his tongue.

Y/N ran one hand slowly up the door frame, the long sleeve of the coat dropping down to reveal a smooth, naked arm. “Whatcha doin’?”

A bit of drool sloshed from the corner of his mouth and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. “Wonderin’ where you got Cas’s coat from.”

Y/N licked her lips and turned slowly so that he would see all her curves and edges. “Stole it from his room. Who knew he had more than one of these things?”

“He’s gone through a few over the years.” There was a lump in Dean’s throat that he was sure was his lust in physical form, and he spoke around it, trying to keep his cool. “None have ever fit him like that though.”

She took a step inside the room, bare feet moving in a perfect dance toward the bed. Her hips swayed, her lips parted. “You like?” Painted fingers ran over the sash and tugged the ends, squeezing her waist even tighter.

Dean lost his breath. “Uh...yeah. Yeah, I do.”

Y/N laughed sweetly. “Knew you would.”

His brow raised as she neared the bed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

One knee on the bed, mattress moulding around her. “Nothing, it’s just...sometimes you get a look in your eye when Cas is around.”

Dean startled, pushing himself up against the headboard, crushing the pillows beneath him. “I don’t have a thing for Cas,” he said sternly.

“I didn’t say you did.”

“You kinda did.”

“Whoa!” Y/N threw her hands up and laughed to herself. “All I’m saying is…guys in long coats are hot. And so is Cas. He’s a damned angel for fuck’s sake. Who wouldn’t wanna try it if they could?”

Dean pouted and shrugged, thinking it over. “Yeah, I guess.”

“And anyway, Cas isn’t here right now.” Another knee on the bed and Y/N climbed over him, fitting her thighs tight around his. “And I’m wearing a surprise for you beneath all this tan.”

Dean licked his lips and lifted his knees, forcing Y/N to slide closer to him. “Oh, really?” He chewed his lip and tried to peek between the coat folds. “Whatcha got on under there? That hot pink strappy thing?”

Y/N shook her head, grinning innocently. “Nope.”

“Hmm… the black one piece with the hole in the-”

“Not even close!”

Dean ran his hands down her back, trying to feel for a clue. “OK, I give up. What’s hiding under all that London Fog?” He flicked at the lapel and Y/N swatted his hand away.

“Tisk, tisk. Patience, Mr. Winchester.”

Dean laughed. “Yeah, patience and I ain’t exactly ever been on good terms.”

She smiled and opened the knot on the sash, letting the ties fall to her sides. “Then I guess I won’t keep you waiting any longer.”

His eyes dipped to the buttons as she opened each one, taking her sweet time, driving him insane. When the last was popped, Y/N sat back a bit and pulled open the coat, revealing his ultimate favorite costume: nothing.

Dean growled. “This. This is perfect.” He reached forward and cupped her breasts in his hands, loving the heat of her, the softness. Her nipples hardened instantly beneath his wide palms and she leaned forward to kiss his plump lips.

“You like?”

“Baby,” he moaned, his brain already buzzing with hunger. “I love.”

She bit down his words, sucking them from his mouth with her perfect lips; hands massaging his neck and shoulders, digging into him, begging for him.

He moaned into her mouth, still playing with her tits, loving how close she was, how perfect, heavy against him. He felt himself swelling and let his mind drift as Y/N licked into his ear, nipping and sucking wherever the urge brought her. When she ran out of room, she tugged on his shirt and Dean sat up too quickly to remove it and something popped. A lightning bolt of pain flew from his right shoulder all the way down to his ass and beyond, pooling in his foot until everything went numb for a moment.

“Fuck!”

Y/N flew backwards, hoping off of him as his pained curse filled the room. “What happened? Are you OK?”

Dean hissed and clenched his teeth as he shifted on the bed trying to ease the strange pain. “Yeah, just… something pulled funny.”

Her face dropped and Y/N lay a soothing hand over his heart. “Did I break you?”

Despite the discomfort, Dean laughed and grabbed her hand, bringing it to his lips. “No. I’m OK. just like… ouch.” With a sigh, he scooted down the bed and found a pillow to crash into. “Come ‘ere.”

Y/N pouted but laid down with him, stealing half of his pillow instead of using her own. She always liked his better anyway. “I’m sorry. Maybe this week’s been too much.”

“Hey.” Dean’s brow creased as he went on the defense. “This week’s been amazing, you shut your mouth. I’m just…”

“Old?”

He scoffed. “How dare you!”

Y/N cupped his jaw and patted his cheek lovingly. “I don’t care how old you get. You’re perfect. And old’s better than dead anyway.” She winked and he nodded.

“You got that right.”

“So let’s just cuddle.” She turned onto her side, facing away from him, and settled in. “You can cuddle, cantcha?”

Dean smiled and rolled to fit himself behind her, one arm slung over her middle. “Yes, ma’am.”

Y/N sighed and lay her hand on his, keeping him there. “Good.”

He closed his eyes and let the pain subside, nuzzling into the crook of her neck. She smelled like apples and wind; like that summer he spent on the farm in upstate New York. Fresh and sunny and real.

She wiggled a bit, getting comfortable, and Dean hummed in interest as her ass rubbed against him; just a thin layer of cotton and that old trench coat lying between them. He pushed his hips forward and let his body do what it wanted.

His lips wanted her throat, so they took it, kissing and suckling at the tender flesh beneath her ear; teeth gently scraping at her shoulder, inducing a shiver that brought her closer still.

His hand wanted her supple flesh, so it rose from her waist to her tits, rolling each nipple between his long, calloused fingers until she moaned and pushed her ass backwards more, arching against him.  

His body wanted more, wanted all of her. He left her breasts and slid down her body, carefully pushing her legs apart and pressing against her pussy. Her heat was intoxicating. Her fingers wrapped around his wrist and urged him onward; her breath becoming heavy as he dipped inside.  

“Want you,” she moaned, twisting her neck to reach his lips.

He kissed her hard. “You have me.”

“You promise?”

Her whisper blew across his lips and Dean nearly died; so taken with every tiny thing about her, he couldn’t think of ever letting her go.

“Promise.”

She turned fully then, knocking his fingers from her thighs, and took his face in her hands, kissing him hard and fully, holding onto every bit of him. When he rolled over her, she paused, pulling back from their kiss to look him in the eye. “Are you sure?”

He grinned and kissed her deeper, pushing her knees apart with his bowed legs. “I’m fine.”

The trenchcoat fell away and Y/N helped him tug the boxers from his hips, gently stripping him with warm fingers and lingering kisses.

"Slow," she whispered, guiding his cock into her. "Go slow. I wanna feel you."

Dean pushed up on his thick arms and let his hips glide back and forth, rocking gently, in and out until he was coated fully in her juices. She felt every inch of him and her body tightened more with each thrust.

“Oh god…” Her eyes were screwed shut and her lips were parted, ripe for the taking. Dean plucked at them with his teeth, sucking her into his mouth as he fell into a steady rhythm, leisurely stoking the fire between them.

When he felt her begin to pulse around his cock, he licked at her lips and set himself perfectly above her. “Y/N, open your eyes.”

She bit her lip as the orgasm loomed, unable to do much more than feel.

“Look at me,” he demanded, soft but firm. Her eyes popped open and an unstoppable smile lifted her lips. “There’s my girl. I wanna see you cum. I wanna watch you.”

Teeth still tucked into her bottom lip, she nodded and her eyes grew wider, an almost manic look taking over as her body let go. She convulsed in his arms, pussy pushing and pulling at his cock, forcing him to join her in mindless bliss for a moment.

Dean’s left elbow crumbled beneath him and he fell down, crushing her into the mattress as he came. He panted against her neck and Y/N wrapped her shaking arms tight around him, hugging him closer.

“I love you, Dean Winchester,” she whispered, expecting nothing in return.

He smiled and kissed her shoulder where the trench coat had fallen aside. He could never find the words when he needed them, ever afraid to voice them, but he knew she knew, and that was enough.

2020 Forever Tags:

@akshi8278​ @alwayskeepfightingsweetheart​ @amanda-teaches​ @bakutododeku69 @because-imma-lady-assface​ @broiderie​ @burningcoffeetimetravel​ @cheritzie​ @cosicas-cuquis​ @covered-byroses​ @crashdevlin​ @deansotherotherblog​ @deansgirl215​ @deanwanddamons​ @defenderrosetyler​ @dontshootmespence​ @emoryhemsworth​ @feelmyroarrrr​ @focusonspn​ @hannahindie​ @herbologystudent252​ @ilsawasanacrobat​ @justcallmeasmodeus​ @ladyjenny19​ @laxe-from-outer-space @mariekoukie6661​ @missjenniferb​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @msjava1972​ @mylovelydame21​ @mysticmaxie​ @pilaxia​ @sandlee44​ @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester​ @squirrelnotsam​ @tatted-trina6​ @typicalweirdbookworm​ 

TWN: 

@rebelemilu​ @pastathighs​ @deans-baby-momma​ @bobbie3939​ @peachyafshawn​ @spencer-reids-babygirl @akrasiaev @shadowkat-83​ @deangirl7695​ @foxyjwls007 @bxbyizzy​ @chenshemesh1 @pandaxo79 

[zmediaoutlet]

in support of Texas relief, @cestlestial-beings donated $50, and requested hurt/comfort wincestiel after 9.03. Thank you for donating!

to get your own personalized fic, please see this post.

(read on AO3)

Cas is different. It's not just the clothes, although that was such a surprise that Sam almost didn't recognize him when they finally found him, knocked out in that reaper's apartment. That was a surprise, too—when Sam had thought Castiel was dead—and Dean all panicked, clutching at his face, when Sam woke up (from being knocked out? it must have been a bad fight)—but there was Cas, blinking and groaning and sore and saying, "I thought—I didn't think you'd—"

Uncertain, unbalanced. Weak. Sam thinks it and hates himself for thinking it, but it's true. The Cas they've known was a powerhouse, not just in his grace but in his certitude. No matter what insane plan, no matter how dangerous or frightening, Cas just stepped into it. It was like bravery except that Sam wasn't sure that Cas knew what fear really was. Dean hugs him close and Cas clutches at Dean's sides, at his jacket; when Sam tugs him in Cas's fingers dig into his shirt and they feel… soft. Human. Human—well, that's the problem.

"Man, you've gotta listen to me," Dean says, close. His hand on Cas's shoulder, his face this tangle. Sam's been on the other side of it before and he wonders if Cas is feeling the same heart-crumpling slam of guilt. "What were you thinking?" Cas's head ducks and Sam thinks, again, wrong. It feels so strange. Dean glances at Sam and his voice gets lighter. "And what are you doing, huh? Going home with strange girls. Me and Sam are chopped liver now, or something?"

"You're not chopped liver," Cas says, quiet. Sorry. "I was just—cold. And very hungry. April seemed kind."

"They always do," Dean says, and Sam huffs but gets his hand around the back of Cas's neck, reassuring. Cas looks up at him and seems wrecked. Like before, when Heaven had cut him off and his grace was thinning, spooling away—except, Sam thinks, that's how it's going to be, now. Castiel, their angel, not an angel anymore. Something snakes through his stomach, thinking it, but he can't quite pin it down. Dean's grabbing Cas back, though, hugging him close and putting a hand in his hair and looking so relieved Sam almost looks away, and the snaking feeling disappears, in favor of getting Cas close and warm, and safe, and theirs. Theirs, again. Maybe for the first time.

He sleeps in the backseat, on the drive home. Dean keeps checking the rearview. "He's fine," Sam says, and Dean says, fast, "I know," and then, slower, "I know, I just…"

Sam twists around. Cas is tucked in behind Dean's seat, Sam's jacket pulled up over his chest, passed out hard despite the thin morning light. Sam's seen him sleep only once before and it keeps pinging him, strange. "It feels wrong," he says, quiet. "Like it's not him."

Dean looks at him sideways and then turns back to the road. "It's him," he says, firm. "Has to be. Who else would be dumb enough to trust a reaper?" Sam snorts, flicks Dean's arm. Gets a half-smile that appears and disappears so fast Sam might've imagined it, and then Dean rubs his mouth with the back of two knuckles, glancing up in the rearview again. "I know what you mean. Like—what is he, if he's not…"

Sam shakes his head. Hard to say. What would they be, if they weren't hunters? Not much, Sam thinks, but they'd have each other at least. They always have. "We'll figure it out," he says, finally, and Dean nods, and keeps his eyes on the road, and Sam settles in to his side of the seat and wonders how.

Night again, by the time they hit Kansas. Castiel wakes up an hour from the bunker and croaks out, small, "I need food," and Dean immediately signals for the nearest exit and they hit a drive-through and then Sam watches Cas eat, in the backseat: messy, ravenous. Like when he was cursed by Famine except, of course, it's not anything more supernatural than that particular kind of all-day gnawing hunger. He sucks his fingers eating the fries, eyes closing in relief at grease, salt, protein. Meaty, human. Sort of disgusting but Sam offers him more fries over the backseat and Cas is so grateful that it's sort of endearing, too.

Home. Cas's legs are wobbly, getting out of the backseat. "Whoa," Dean says, steadying his arm. "Too much excitement after being in a coma all day?"

"My body is unreliable," Cas says, looking down, and he sounds uncertain enough about it that Dean's face changes, soft where Cas can't see. "I'm not used to this."

"Of course not, Cas," Sam says. He smiles when Cas looks at him, trying to be encouraging. "It's a lot. I can't really say we understand but—you're just going to need some time. Everything's going to feel weird for a while."

Cas's mouth tilts. "I must say, it's amazing how much time humans waste with urination," he says, and Dean laughs, says, "Okay, partner, let's go," and Sam follows them out of the garage, smiling too, ignoring the sensation in his stomach that keeps saying no. It'll go away. It's time for them to be here for their friend.

Cas asks to shower, before anything else. "I didn't realize people could get so itchy," he says, and Sam rolls his eyes and sets him up with soap, a towel, points out the shampoo and conditioner. He finds Dean going through the drawers in a bedroom they haven't used, frowning. His eyes look more tired than they should, even after two long days of driving. Sam says, "Hey," and isn't expecting Dean to jump like Sam's someone he doesn't expect to see.

"Ought to put a bell on you," Dean says, dragging a hand over his face. He's got a pile—boxers, socks, thin white undershirt. He leans his palms on the dresser and blows out air, slow. "God. I thought he was—"

Sam remembers. Castiel's still face, the blood. He thought he'd seen the knife go in but—well, that was wrong, obviously. Thank god. "He's okay," Sam says. "Or, I don't know. He'll be okay. He's human, right? We're resilient."

Dean lets out a low, fake hah. "Right," he says, and Sam can't hold back anymore—he steps closer, and slides his hand along the low of Dean's back. Dean's head dips, his eyes falling shut. "Sammy," he says, almost like warning, but Sam doesn't want to wait—doesn't know why they've been waiting.

"We're going to be okay, too," Sam says. He pulls at Dean's hip and there's resistance, for a second, but Dean stands up, turns, slides an arm around Sam's waist. His head's turned down until Sam tips his chin up and then there's his brother: tired worry around his eyes, his mouth an unsure slant. Sam drags knuckles along his jaw and smiles at him, trying to make it easy. "We're okay now," he says, and Dean's eyes close, and Sam takes the opportunity and leans down, and kisses him.

Jolt in his stomach. That mouth, familiar after all these years, even if the last year was hard. Even if they haven't touched like this, not really, since the hospital. Dean's soft, unsure for some reason, but Sam's not. After the promise Dean made to him, back at the church, he's not going to be unsure ever again. He frames Dean's jaw in one hand and kisses him deeper and Dean responds slowly, the worry or anxiety or whatever it is uncurling, his hand sliding warm under Sam's shirts, his mouth opening, his breath a sigh. "Sammy," he murmurs, against Sam's lips, and Sam smiles, holds his head, thinks yes.

Dean's eyes are heavy, when Sam pulls back, searching Sam's. He looks exactly like Sam could always want him to look—red mouth, cheeks flushed. Ready. It's not just them, though. "Let's see how Cas is doing, huh?" Sam says, generous, and Dean's eyelashes sweep in a slow blink and even that, god, is enough to send a rush down to Sam's dick. "Yeah," Dean says, raw, and has to clear his throat, and Sam grins at him and picks up the half-assed load of clothes and doesn't think they'll be worn, not for a while.

Cas is drying off when they get back to the shower room, scrubbing his face, standing naked among the ivory tile. He picks his head up from the towel when he hears them and blinks, pink-faced and damp, his body whole, tanned and compact and long-legged. Lovely, Sam thinks, anticipation building in his belly. Cas lets the towel fall to one side, unselfconscious, and Sam blinks. "Holy crap, dude," Dean says, "like three weeks as a human and you're already joining a biker gang?"

A frown before Cas looks down, and touches the tattoos on his ribs like he forgot them. "Oh, right," he says, like this is nothing. "This was—protection. My brothers were chasing me and it seemed prudent to go dark before I had to kill more of them." Dean glances at Sam and Sam bites his lip, shakes his head. Cas is still frowning when he looks up. "I don't know what a gang has to do with it."

"I know you don't," Dean says, quiet, and then, "C'mere."

Soft, easy. Dean holds his hand out and Sam gets a weird frisson in his spine—the times they've done this before. Castiel, angel, in his trenchcoat like armor, with his otherworldly eyes and his strength and his sense always of a universe inside—stepping close, drawn in to Sam's brother like a wasp to a raging fire. Human, now, naked and frail, and he doesn't have a chance. He takes Dean's hand and gets reeled in close, Dean's affection easy even if it's not simple, and Dean says, "God, we were worried about you, man," and Cas blinks and looks down and says, sort of rough, "I—was worried, about me, too," and Dean shakes his head and tips up Cas's chin and kisses him, the gentleness in it clear from across the room, and Sam's stomach flips over and he breathes out and thinks, okay. They'll play it this way.

First time they ever slept with Cas it was strange—Sam was uncertain, Dean was angry. Cas had no idea what to do with either of them. He's come in and out of their lives since then and it never got easier, really, although they got used to it. Sam always had the sense that Cas was watching, a little apart. It was obvious that he was in love with Dean and that he had affection for Sam, and Sam was—okay with that, came to love that about him, too. Even an angel couldn't resist Sam's brother. Sam got it more than anyone else ever would. Still—he was always an angel, no matter that he was warm flesh and a soft too-generous mouth and that he'd learned to suck dick almost as well as Dean could, and whenever he rose from a motel bed in moonlight, Dean sleeping warm against Sam's chest, Sam looked at Cas's bare skin and thought, he was never naked with them. Not really.

Now—

In Dean's bedroom it's shocking, how much Cas needs them. Uncalloused, raw, he grips at Dean's face, his shoulders, reaches for Sam's hand when Sam touches his chest and clutches at it hard enough that Sam's bones grind. "I want," he starts, breathless, but doesn't seem to know how to continue, how to say. Sam kisses the back of his knuckles and looks at Dean, undressed now too and climbing up next to Cas on the too-soft mattress. He raises his eyebrows and Dean nods, frowning a little.

Dean drags a hand up Cas's belly, hides the tattoos, kisses his jaw. Moves in, soft, says, "Hey, man. Relax, okay? Me and Sammy are gonna take care of you, right? Like we always do."

"Always," Cas repeats, turning in toward Dean's body, and Sam takes the opportunity to half-strip, to crawl in behind, pressing up against Cas's warmth. He feels—softer. Sam's fingers dig into his hip and he thinks, abruptly, that he might leave a bruise, and Cas has been untouchable for uncountable years and that's so insane-making that Sam buries his mouth against the back of Cas's shoulder, smooth and tanned-brown and the faintest taste of salt, trying not to think about what they could do. How they could hurt him, if they wanted to. How much he could've been hurt, this last little while, and how maybe he was.

A flinchy gasp—"Yeah, there we go," Dean's saying, with his voice that too-familiar almost-porny tilt—and Sam reaches and finds Dean already jerking Cas off, a smooth fondling pump that's clearly already almost more than Cas can handle. Sam scrapes his teeth along Cas's shoulder and reaches down, feels his balls, full and always a little bigger than Sam expects. "Yeah," Dean says, "is that what you need? Cas. C'mon, tell me."

Jesus, Dean's voice. Cas shudders, one knee pulling forward. "Kiss me again," he half-whispers, and Dean groans and does, and it's wet, sloppy. Sam's mouth waters and he kisses the back of Cas's neck, under his ear—grips his thigh and moves him, pushes him forward so he's half-sprawled over Dean's body—and Dean rolls with it, gathering Cas in closer, gripping his ass, pulling him in. "Oh," Cas says, at the full-body contact, and Sam says, "Yeah, Cas—go on, make it feel good," getting up on his knees so he can see.

He reaches between Cas's legs, touches his balls again, traces along the clean light hair in his taint, touches his asshole. Cas groans, surging against Dean, and Dean laughs a little, gripping Cas's hips, spreading his legs wider with his knees. "Yeah, buddy, come on—been a long time, right?" Sam sticks his thumb in his mouth to wet it, brings it back to Cas's hole, hot, snugged tight—trying not to actually listen to Dean, so he doesn't just pull his dick out of his boxers and jerk off over Cas's ass. It's hard to ignore, though: "When's the last time you fucked anything? Was it Purgatory? Remember, by the river?"

"Of course I remember the river," Cas says, shuddery, but lifts up suddenly, his knees spreading around Dean's hips and his ass pushing back against Sam's hand, his shoulders tight and hunched. "Please, I can't—I feel—Sam—"

Sam comes up behind him, wraps his arms around Cas's ribs. "Too much?" he says, and reaches down—god, yeah. Painfully hard, leaking wet already when they've only gone for a few minutes, a smear shining on Dean's belly. Dean pets his thighs, his eyes tight at the corners. Sam squeezes, soft, and Cas's face turns away, his back flinching against Sam's chest. "God. Okay—come on, buddy, it's okay. Just let it go, all right?"

"Yeah, Cas," Dean says, sitting up. He kisses Cas's chest, soft, his belly warm and soft against Sam's knuckles. "Let us see, huh? Damn, you're hot like this—isn't he, Sammy?"

Sam jerks Cas's dick instead of answering, pressing his lips to Cas's throat. He can feel the race of his pulse, there, the hammering anxious need, and Dean whispers something—Sam can't hear it—and then Cas groans low and hurt and he's flexing, in Sam's hand, spilling heat all over Dean's stomach and chest, jerking, giving up more maybe than he's ever given.

"There," Dean says, warm, and Sam's dick flexes in his boxers, full, wanting. "Takes the edge off, right?"

"I think there may only be edge," Cas says, after a second, his voice more normal even if his breath's still heavy, and Sam snorts, squeezes his dick. Still thick, even with Sam's hand smeared and slick. Cas's fingers brush the back of his hand and he turns his head, his mouth a strange tilt. "I didn't know if…"

Dean frowns, not understanding, but Sam gets it instantly. "We want you here," he says. He squeezes around Cas's ribs, soft. "Not just for this. Angel or not. Got it?"

Castiel looks in his eyes, searching, and then smiles, small. Sam's stomach flips. "Okay," he says, and turns to look down at Dean, who's smiling too. "If you'll have me."

"If he'll have us, he says," Dean says, rolling his eyes. "Like I'm not gonna get my mouth on that hot-ass tattoo here in the next five minutes."

Cas tilts his head, and Sam laughs. He puts away the strangeness. Cas is here, and safe, and that can't be anything but good. It'll be good to get to show him how humans actually do things. Any weirdness can wait for another day.

[profoundnet]

Header by @cryptomoon and is available on merch from her redbubble store. You can use all those fancy emojis (and more!) on our Discord server!

The masterpost is open for all creations by ProfoundBond members which are posted in their entirety during that month.

MEMBER CONTRIBUTIONS FOR JUNE 2020!

Featuring works by @blueraven06, @castielslostwings, @delo0821, galium, @goldenraeofsun, @imbiowaresbitch, @jemariel, @masterofevilmonkeyness, @multifandom-fanatic, ravens_tell_stories, @saywhatjessie, @shadowkat-83, shikaro, @spnsmile, tiamatv, @thefandomsinhalor, @vulfmert, and @wookieefucker under the cut.

Redamber79 - @imbiowaresbitch - Redamber79

Free Hugs (E, 2.6k)

Castiel is moving into his dorm for his first year when his older brother Gabriel trips him into the arms of a half-naked hunk holding a sign reading FREE HUGS. Then Cas meets his roommate...

Tags: No Archive Warnings apply, meet-cute, explicit, roommate AU

The Fall of Castiel (E, 5.8k)

Another fight, Castiel's blue eyes flashing as he pinned Dean to a wall for his stubborn refusal to accept his role. A desperate attempt to convince the angel to join Team Free Will. Dean could never have anticipated how well it would work.

Tags: no archive warnings, explicit, canon-adjacent, wing king, grace powered orgasms, claiming, confessions

“Yes, Sir.” (E, 3.8k)

Dean's earned himself a spanking, but keeps losing the count. Cas decides it's time to up the ante for his punishment.

Tags: no archive warnings apply, bdsm, explicit, safe sane consensual, safewords, top cas/bottom dean

Pizza Man (E, 3.4k)

Dean and Castiel are roommates in their third year of college. Cas frantically shows his best friend a horrible typo on the latest ad for the pizza place where he works, just knowing it's going to ruin his night.

Tags: no archive warnings apply, roommates au, explicit, PWP

Grow For Me (E, 20k)

Dean is desperate for a housemate after Charlie moves out. After interviewing several potential tenants with near disastrous results, he meets Cas. Can the lawyer with the strange habit of talking to plants fit into Dean's life?

Tags: no archive warnings apply, omegaverse, POV Dean, explicit, Roommate AU, Complete, Happy Ending, mating cycles/in heat

FriendofCarlotta - @delo0821 - FriendofCarlotta

Adventures in Demon Summoning (E, 10k)

When Dean's friends get high and decide to summon a demon, it seems like a monumentally bad idea. Of course, even Dean couldn't have guessed that the whole thing would land him with a grumpy, sarcastic angel who seems dead-set on following him around.

Tags: Alternate Universe - College/University, First Time, Meet-Cute, Soft Boys

JessJesstheBest - @saywhatjessie - JessJesstheBest

Five Times Dean felt Out Of His Depth and One Time He Definitely Was (G, 10k)

It was with a sore shin and a broken model P-51D Mustang that Dean began to consider he wasn’t quite ready to be a foster parent. Or it's exactly what is says in the title.

Tags: Human AU, Fluff, Parenthood, foster parent au, Established Relationship, 5+1 Things

castielslostwings - @castielslostwings - Castielslostwings

Fire and Ice (E, 165k)

Firefighter Dean Winchester has somehow tumbled headfirst into a whole new kind of relationship with his quirky paramedic best friend, Castiel Novak. What was only meant to be mutual relief from their high-stress jobs is quickly developing into something more, but with all the missed signals and crossed wires, can these two ever figure out that they're so much closer to being on the same page than they think?

Tags: Firefighter Dean, Paramedic Castiel, Dom Castiel, Sub Dean, Friends to lovers, mutual pining, angst with a happy ending, BDSM, all the sex.

multifandom-fanatic - @multifandom-fanatic - multifandom_fanatic

We Can’t Keep This Undercover (T, 5k)

Cas and Dean have been dating for a month, but Sam is clueless, despite the fact that they haven't been hiding that they're together. Or so they thought. After reflecting on Sam's obliviousness, Dean deviously suggests he and Cas try to be as obvious as possible to see how long it’ll take for Sam to realize. Cue Dean and Cas' escalating attempts to prove they're together, and Sam mistaking every scenario until Dean just can't take it anymore.

Tags: Oblivious Sam Winchester, Clueless Sam Winchester, Fluff, Feels, Teasing, Idiots in Love, Sneaky, Flirting, Domestic Fluff, Plotting

Put a Ring on It (T, 3.2k)

After non-stop researching, Cas is in the Bunker's kitchen making Dean lunch with the radio on when he hears Single Ladies by Beyoncé. Suddenly he's stuck by the lyrics and realizes just how much he loves Dean and therefore needs to put a ring on him. Cas goes out and buys a ring, and a week later he proposes to Dean in the library of the Bunker. Will Dean say yes?

Tags: Marriage Proposal, Proposal, Engagement, Castiel Proposes Marriage to Dean Winchester, Inspired by Beyoncé, Crack, Song: Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It), Romantic Fluff, Love, Fluff

galium - galium

scents & sensibility (M, 5.7k)

There are three things Dean knows about betas: (1) Betas are boring. (2) Betas can be passive. (3) Betas have a mediocre sense of smell (well, unless you're Cas).

Tags: AU, A/B/O

ravens_tell_stories - ravens_tell_stories

i’d rather drown (E, 3.7k)

Was there anything weird that you noticed?” “Weird? Other than the fact that I could see you while you were several states away?” “Yes, Dean,” Cas sounds impatient now, which is never a good sign. “Weirder than normal.” Dean tilts his head, weighing his options, then sighs and scrubs a hand over his face. “Yeah, I, uh… I could see your wings.” ~~ wing!kink destiel oneshot.

Tags: No archive warnings apply, smut and a little fluff, pwp, handjobs, set season 8

Jemariel - @jemariel - jemariel

Cas is a Tummy Sleeper (T, <1k)

A short fluffy ficlet. Cas is sleepy and snuggly. Dean is smitten. Everything is beautiful and nothing hurts.

Tags: Cuddles, bedsharing, human!Cas, fluff

MasterOfEvilMonkeyness - @masterofevilmonkeyness

“Ah yes. Me. My brother. And his Angel who sneaks in his bed when they think I’m asleep” (SFW)

Art created for Meme about Sam, Dean and Cas.

Vulfmert - @vulfmert

Ghost Road (SFW)

Art created for the fic Ghost Road by Kris-Kenobi in the Bottom Dean Big Bang and it’s lovely.

Tags: Michigan, Canon Compliant, Human!Cas, Only One Bed, Case Fic, Post Series. Collaboration with fic by Kris-Kenobi.

spnsmile - @spnsmile - spnsmile

Undercover in the Bunker (M, 3.5k)

Castiel invites an angel to the Bunker to 'observe' the Winchesters in order to change Heaven's view about his charge, only to end up making Dean just a little miserable and himself a little jealous.

Tags: Domestics,  Castiel in the Bunker

Devastatingly Yours (G, 3.9k)

When almost everyone—demons included— all but told Dean that his angel is the hottest, most devastatingly handsome angel in the face of the seven seas, he not only believed them, he’s secretly and most exclusively Cas’ number one fan. So when the angel is recruited as a model in the middle of a case, what is Dean to do?

Tags: Established relationships, domestic, fluff

Saved by a Stranger (E, 43k)

Rule One: Never change the deal. Rule Two: No names. Rule Three: Never look in the package. Ex-Special Forces operator, Alpha Castiel Novak adheres three strict sets of rules, which he never breaks as a mercenary "transporter" who moves goods—human or otherwise— from one place to another. No questions asked. Until his new delivery contains a deal-breaker pretty face hot-headed Omega—who turns out to be his true mate— Castiel knows rules have to be changed especially with a dangerous group intent to get their hands on his Omega. Castiel wants to see them try. Destiel x The Transporter AU

Tags: Non-con,  Graphic Depiction of violence

The Room Service (E, 39k)

‘Hands off, Pants on!’

Dean Winchester has groomed himself to be a professional room service staff providing hotel guests with all the necessities they need while catering to all mundane whims and complaints except one: keep hands off the staff. Until a mysterious blue-eyed guy enters the 7th heaven floor and shakes Dean’s steamy dreams. And after saving Dean from one dangerous stalker, it seems like the restriction is practically flying off the window for his grumpy blue-eyed hero.

Hotel x Destiel AU

Tags: Romance,  Fluff,  First meeting,  Jealousy,

Baby Plushie (G, 1.1k)

A Baby. Who says Dean doesn't need it?

Tags: Romance,  Fluff. Inspired by art by @gabester-sketch.

Shadowkat83 - @shadowkat-83 - Shadowkat83

Better Than I Know Myself (T, 1.1k)

He had to make a choice; he didn't want to. The choice was between the two people he cared about the most: Cas and Sam. They both knew him so well but on different levels. How could he possibly go through with this?

Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Songfic, Fluff, Love, Confessions, Mutual Pining, Ambiguous/Open Ending

Shikaro - shikaro

Mr. Tall, Dark and Handsome (E, 1.5k)

the one where Dean comes untouched for the first time

or the one where they meet at a bar

Tags: PWP

blueraven06 - @blueraven06 - blueraven06

College days (G, 1.2k)

It's Castiel's first day of college and he is already late.

Tags: Alternate Universe - College/University

goldenraeofsun - @goldenraeofsun - goldenraeofsun

Magic Quarantine Ride (M, 1k)

“Cas,” Dean growls as he stalks past the hospital's general information desk. “What the hell are you doing here, you psycho? Go home - where it’s safe!” Cas whirls around. “You forgot this,” he says hurriedly as he rushes forward with the necklace he made for Dean. “I told you, it will provide protection.” He waves it in the air like a crazy person trying to ward off demons. “You are insane,” Dean says flatly.

Tags: They were quarantined, witch!cas, college nurse!dean, fluff and angst, mentions of COVID-19, mutual pining, emotional hurt/comfort, discussions of PTSD

thefandomsinhalor - @thefandomsinhalor - thefandomsinhalor

A Driver Worth His Salt (E, 68k)

Twenty-year-old Dean Winchester hates fixing up stolen cars on the side for Gordon Walker. But with his grandfather’s dry-cleaning business slowly dying, medical bills piling up, and his younger brother Sam abandoning the prospect of attending college because of their grim situation, Dean convinces himself that it isn’t as reckless as it seems.

When everything goes belly up, leaving him in a troubling position with the wrong people, a representative of the Garrisons, the city’s most powerful and notorious family, offers Dean to help him with his situation in exchange for his employment.

The job is simple: drive the passenger a few times a week to yet-undisclosed locations and return with said passenger without fail. Don’t ask questions. Be on time. Be discreet.

And never interact with each other outside of work.

Shady, but simple.

So, he accepts.

But once he meets the passenger in question—the sharply dressed and rough-looking Castiel Novak—Dean finds that abiding those rules may be more complicated than he had anticipated.

Tags: Graphic Depiction of Violence, Alternate Universe - Modern Settings, Crimes & Crimes & Criminals, BAMF Castiel, Slow Burn, Hurt Sam Winchester, Trauma

wookieefucker - @wookieefucker - wookieefucker

The Eye of the Storm (T, 8.5k)

“Only fifteen miles to the highway,” Dean said cheerfully, reading from a sign on the side of the path. Bobby groaned loudly. “Shoulda known I’d get my body back only to put it through its paces right away.” Amara left with Chuck, promising that she was going to give Dean what he needed. Maybe what he needed was different than her first impulse.

Tags: eventual Castiel/Dean Winchester, season 12 AU, canon AU, canon-typical violence

tiamatv - tiamatv

Spicier Ginger (G, 4k)

Kevin held out a flat piece of dough and spooned in a teaspoon of pork mixture. “You can’t put too much in them or leave any air bubbles inside," he explained, folding up the dumpling. "‘Cause they’ll explode.” “So kind of like packing shotgun shells,” Dean joked. “Uh, yeah. Sure, Dean,” Kevin agreed, very dubiously. “Sure.”

Tags: Cooking, Domesticity, Kevin Tran Lives!, Winchester Family Fluff

To Sleep, Perchance (T, 3.4k)

Dean wasn’t used to good dreams. But he was used to taking what he could get—so when he dreamed of a lean, compact body pressed against his back, an arm heavy over his waist, he settled into it, hazy and comfortable.

Tags: Canon Temporary Character Death, Canon Compliant, Dreams vs Reality, Mark of Cain

Ephelis (E, 1.8k)

“I think someone has sent me a picture of their genitals.” Castiel looked down at his phone. “Erect.”

Tags: AU-Canon Divergence, Dick Pics, Plot What Plot, Fluff and Crack, Season/Series 09

Phaleonopsis (E, 4.8k)

“Here, let me.” Cas’s long fingers plucked away a dead leaf from a calathea, and Dean watched helplessly as Cas rubbed the bare spot where the leaf had come away with a fingertip. “See? Isn’t it nice to let someone touch you now and again?” “Goddammit, Cas ain’t the creep, I’m the creep,” Dean muttered, and put his head down on the desk.

Tags: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Gardening, Roommates, Fluff And Smut, Alpha Castiel/Omega Dean

(Atypical) Love Story (E, 13.k)

“Are you… scenting me?” the man in an oversized beige trench coat asked, suspiciously, in a deep gravel voice that ran down Dean’s spine. "Why? I really don't smell like much." Dean’s mouth sagged open. “Dude,” he answered, honestly, “You smell amazing.” He’d never seen anyone look so shocked at a compliment before. “O-oh.”

Tags: Non-Traditional A/B/O Dynamics; Scenting; Top/Bottom Versatile Dean/Castiel; Alpha Dean/Omega Castiel; Enthusiastic Consent

Pigment (G, 1.6k)

Dean wasn’t ashamed of what he was doing or anything. He didn’t think he had any reason to be, hell. So what if he liked to spend a little of his downtime just putting little blobs of paint inside neat little lines?

Tags: Canon Compliant, Hobbies, Painting, Fluff

[daughters-and-winsisters]

Huntress- Part 24: Loss

Sam x Daughter!Reader, takes place in S12 E23 so warning:SPOILERS

Part one Part two Part three Part four Part five Part Six Part Seven Part Eight Part Nine Part Ten Part Eleven Part Twelve Part Thirteen Part Fourteen Part Fifteen Part Sixteen Part Seventeen Part Eighteen Part Nineteen Part Twenty Part Twenty One Part Twenty Two Part Twenty Three

A/N: There will be one more part after this in the Huntress series

“Okay so let me get this straight, we beat the Brits, kick their smug, tea-swirling asses -no offence Y/N- and instead of finally catching a break we get Lucifer?!” Uncle Dean sighed, pacing about the bunker while you sat with your Dad and Mary. You looked up from your mug of tea, glaring at him over the rim before turning your attention to the photographs your Dad had printed. “You’re sure that’s him?” Mary asked. “Yeah I’m sure.” Dad nodded, not looking at them for too long. It was Lucifer, alright. “In his old vessel?” You asked. “Yeah...”“How’s that possible?” Mary took a photograph from the table and studied it. “Kelly I guess...” Dad shrugged. “So what do we do?” You said, putting your tea down and sitting back in your chair. “Well,” Dad cleared his throat, “Rowena can slam Lucifer back in the cage.” “Great,” said Mary, “where is she?”

Dad picked up his phone almost immediately, standing up from the table as he did so. You all watched in anticipation as he held the phone to his ear. He rose his head, his eyes pacing the room. He then breathed a sharp breath and looked to Uncle Dean who shot him a frown: “What?” Dad put the phone on speaker and held it up so you could all hear.

Then came a voice: “Oh and if you’re looking for Rowena she is presently indisposed which is a delicate way of saying I stomped on her face till the white meat showed and then stomped on her face just in case,” Lucifers voice sounded as smug as usual, “uh...it was messy. Screamy. Had to be done, though. I’m about to be a Dad! Can’t raise a kid from a cell, can I? Speaking of, any idea where Castiel is?” “Go to hell.” Dad snapped. “Oh good one! Let me write that down.” “Look-“ Dean cleated his throat, but was interrupted. “Oh, hey Dean! I know I know you guys are gonna want to kill me but you’ve never done it and you never will. Especially now Rowena is gone,” he paused, but none of you had anything to say, “catch you guys later!”

You all fell silent with the phone, aware he was right, but not wanting to admit it.You sucked it up and spoke, “He’s got a point.” Dad threw you a look you couldn’t quite read, but composed himself and said, “Okay, so we just have to keep Cas and Kelly moving. Lucifer can’t hurt them if he can’t find them.” “And Cas will go along with that?” Mary asked, sounding unconvinced. “We won’t give him a choice.” Uncle Dean said sternly. You frowned with concern, “What he means is we’ll figure something out by talking it through with them.” You corrected, not willing to make any more causes for tension. “Right.” Dad nodded. “How do we find them?” Mary turned to your Dad. “There will be signs: locust plagues, freak storms things like that.” “Okay so we’re looking for something weird.” Mary said unenthusiastically. “Story of our lives.” Uncle Dean huffed.

——————

You all sat back around the table, researching on phones and laptops to find anything weird. “What about this?” Uncle Dean held up a news report about a three-headed calf being born. You chuckled, “Poor mother.” which made him cringe. “Not biblical.” Dad muttered, not looking up from his tablet.

“You rang?” Crowley spoke up from now where, appearing at the table. Before you could even take him in, Uncle Dean launched himself at him, punching him square in the jaw and sending him flying. “Did you do it?!” Uncle Dean shouted, holding a demon-blade to his throat, “Did you let Lucifer out of the cage?” “I didn’t let-“ “Tell me!” Uncle Dean pushed, shaking Crowley by the collar. “Dean, wait! Don’t kill him.” Dad put a hand out. “Seriously?” Mary raised an eyebrow. “He wrote the cage spell with Rowena,” you nodded in understanding, “he could help.” “What if he can’t?” Mary asked, eager to put an end to Crowley. “Well then we kill him.” Dad said, making Crowley’s eyes widen as Uncle Dean loosened his grip.

Crowley stood himself up when Uncle Dean let go, patting his coat down. He swivelled his head a little and cleared his throat, aware you were all waiting for what he had to say and making the most of that small amount of control. “I put Lucifer in a vessel of my own making. I had to win. Too damn many people have been after my throne. I put the Devil on a leash to show everyone not to mess with me.” Crowley explained. “Worked out well.” Uncle Dean scoffed. “And then I narrowly escaped death,” Crowley paused and eyed you all, “by hiding in a rat.” “Must have been nice being clean for a change.” You remarked, earning a smirk from the others. “Gave me a break from my work,” Crowley continued, ignoring your comment, “made me realise just how much I hate it. The constant stupid questions the mountains and mountains of paperwork, who wants that? Not me. Not anymore.” “So you decided to hide in a rodent?” Mary asked. “I placed my bets. The Winchester’s come out on top. And I can help, after we put Lucifer in the cage I’ll seal the gates and you’ll never see another demon again...except me, of course. Do we have a deal?” You looked to your Dad who you could see was thinking it through, analysing the pros and cons in his mind. Uncle Dean looked as suspicious as always, but Mary was harder to read. “Okay, fine. But you stay here and you keep quiet.” Uncle Dean lurched forward and slammed a demon blade into Crowley’s hand. It pierced through his skin and into the table, holding his arm in place. Crowley grunted and scowled, watching as you all stood up to gather your things.

Your Dad gave you the same look and you realised he wanted you to stay back. You sighed to yourself, waiting till Mary and Uncle Dean had left the room.  Dad gave you a tight smile before saying what you’d been expecting, “I need you to stay back.” He placed an arm gently on your back and guided you to where Crowley could no longer see or hear.

You shuffled on your feet and attempted to find something convincing or witty to say, but you just stayed quiet with your eyes fixed on the floor. “Y/N, I need you to be safe. Make sure Crowley doesn’t get up to anything.” “How many times are we gonna have these conversations?” You asked, “How many times do I have to save your ass or let you save mine before you realise I’m a Hunter too?” “That’s not what I meant-“ “I’m not giving up on the last hurdle, Dad.” “It’s just with your powers and everything, we don’t know what’ll happen. I can’t risk you being in more danger because we don’t take them seriously.“ “Do you want me to sit around and panic because I don’t know if I’ll see my family again? You want me to spend the rest of my life knowing I could’ve helped or died trying to save them if only I’d have come with you all?” “We don’t plan on dying.“ “And I don’t plan on waiting to find out if you do,” your voice went quiet and your eyes teared up, “I’m sick of people not coming back.“ Dad’s expression and stance softened, he let out a sigh and gently wrapped his arms around your frame. Placing a kiss on the top of your head, he gently rubbed your upper arm with his thumb.“Okay,” he nodded against you, “but you be careful.”

——————

The drive was quiet, everyone consumed by their own thoughts of what might happen. Mary seemed restless, loading and unloading and then reloading her gun in the seat next to you. Dad didn’t look away from the window the entire time, careful not to miss anything, just in case. Uncle Dean watched the road and played no music. And you, you watched the three of them, wondering how you’d ended up here. If anyone had told you a few years back that you’d be driving with your Dad, Uncle and Grandma to a house where there’s an angel helping the presidents girlfriend to have her half-human, half-angel, son-of-Lucifer child you would have laughed in their face. And yet there you were.

When you pulled up outside the house you couldn’t help but admire the scenery despite the situation. It was one of those American lakehouses from the films, with little wooden steps outside and a bungalow-type house just sat comfortably amongst the greenery. The sort of building that should look out of place, but it just works. But, this wasn’t the time to sit and stare, so you got out of the car, noticing how Uncle Dean had almost made it to the door by the time you were out. You followed on, seeing Cas in his usual attire look astonished at your arrival.

“Dean?” Cas said in shock, glancing at the rest of you before turning his attention back to Uncle Dean. “Look, Cas, is this place heavily warded?” “Of course.” “Enough to ward of Lucifer?” Dad added. “Lucifer?” Cas echoed with wide eyes. “Look, you and Kelly taking off was a stupid move. There’s no way Lucifer can get his hands on that kid.” Dad said sternly. “Kelly can’t be moved, she’s in labour.” Cas explained, accompanied by Kelly crying out in pain. Mary turned her head to where the noise had come from and stumbled over her words, “I’ll go make sure she’s okay.”

“How much time do we have?” Cas asked, turning back to look at you. “We don’t know.” You shrugged. Dean then groaned in pain, doubling over as he held his bad knee. “Wait, Dean, let me.” Cas began to heal Dean, but something else caught your eye and a low hum of whispers surrounded your thoughts. A bright shining light, as though a line had been cut through the Earth was stood up on its end just outside. And, as insane as it sounded, it was calling to you. The whispers were seemingly nonsense, inaudible syllables of a dead language, but they were definitely calling you.

You felt your head pulsate with some sort of energy and began to walk towards the light. It was shining and had some movement.

Footsteps sounded as they came to see what you were looking at. Dad and Uncle Dean took a step back and Dad put a hand on your shoulder as though he knew what he was protecting you from. The moment his hand touched you the voices left and it was just a light, no sound came from it. “What is it?” You stammered, glancing back to Cas, but finding your eyes unable to look away. “It’s a rip in time and space.” Cas explained. “Like a doorway?” You asked, taking another step forward and ignoring your Dads hold on you. Sure enough, the sounds came back. Perhaps because you were much closer they became louder, an endless chorus that rebounded inside your mind. You could still hear everything else, but it felt secondary. “B-Be careful.” Dad said in vain as you circled the light. “Exactly like a doorway. Only to an alternate reality.” Cas replies. “Where did it come from?” You said, unsure if the words came out right as you could only just hear your own voice. “Well with the nephilim being brought into the world there’s been an abundance of cosmic energies. The odd rip is bound to happen.”

As though your feet had decided before your mind, you found yourself walking towards the rip, the faint shouts of Dad in your ear as you passed through.

——————

You were met with a grey landscape, bodies scattered about the place in the same way leaves are in the autumn. There were areas where smoke was rising from a bundle of twigs. The floor was a harsh sandy texture, no doubt consisting of rubble and decaying parts of the Earth. But, before you could properly take in the place, you felt your powers. You felt them the same way you had done when you’d gotten angry or when you saved Uncle Dean in the tunnel. Only this time it wasn’t a surge of energy that was gone before you could properly grasp it. Instead, it was a continuous level of something and it was powerful. It felt as though you’d finally understood how to control what these were. You rose your fingers, concentrating on a cloud of smoke. As you danced your hand around the smoke followed suit, putting itself out as you rubbed your finger tips together. You couldn’t help but smile.

“Y/N!” Dad hissed, making you drop your smile and lower your hand, “what the hell were you thinking?!” “Sorry...” You looked down, not sure whether to mention what had happened. You coughed a little and decided to keep quiet, after all, it didn’t seem like the time.

“This Earth is caught in an eternal war between heaven and hell with few humans left behind,” Cas explained, “the child opened this door and he can close it. I have faith.” “Well then you’re a dumbass.” Uncle Dean scoffed before jumping into action, “Guys!” He pointed to where a small number of people were headed towards you. They were heavily armed.Dad and Uncle Dean aimed their guns, but you just watched. Cas held his arms up, “Stop. Don’t shoot.” One man who was a few feet ahead of the others came to a halt, he lowered his face cover and tilted his head. You looked to Uncle Dean who immediately lowered his gun. With a shocked face he stammered, “Bobby?” “Do I know you?” The man grumbled. “Bobby,” Dad said in awe, “it’s us. Sam and Dean. Winchester.” You remembered your Dad mentioning a Bobby before, Bobby Singer. Any time he came up in conversation they spoke as though he raised them, as though he’d be proud of them if he could see them now. “Winchester?” This Bobby repeated in thought, “the only Winchester I ever knew was John.“ “Yeah our father.” Uncle Dean pushed. “Doubt it. He died 40 years ago,” he looked at you suspiciously, “you don’t get many kids round here. Take care of her.” “She can take care of herself, thanks.” You remarked. “Good.” He said, his tone making it hard to tell if it was a compliment or not. You decided to take it as one. “The hell is this place?” Dad turned to Cas. Cas sighed, “This is Earth where you two were never born. A world you never saved.”

—————— 

Going back through the door to your world wasn’t as simple as coming through, at least, not for you it wasn’t. The moment you came into contact with the rip the voices flooded your mind and you clutched your head in pain. They were no longer calling you to come, but to stay. With every step they became angrier and louder and you could feel the blood throbbing in your brain and chest as you began to sway. They screamed in your mind, clawing away at you in a desperate attempt to keep you in that otherworld. You could just about see your world and with one last burst of effort, you stumbled through and fell faint. You woke to the house empty. Not just of people, but of furniture and sound and colour. It was empty. Rising from the cold floorboards, you pulled the hair from covering your eyes.

The crunch of footsteps along the stone path sounded, making you jump into action as you followed the sound. “Dad?” You called, your voice shaking a little as you turned the corner. It was’t Dad...you’d come face to face with Lucifer. And he was smiling right at you. You gulped and took a step back, aware there were no weapons on you. “Wh-“ You paused, not sure what to say. “Well,” he said, “this is a fun surprise. I gotta hand it to you guys you never give up.  Even when you really should.” You frowned a little at the use of “guys”, but spoke anyway, “What do you want?” He chuckled,” You’re right. What should I do? Oh God don’t strike me down! Sam, you gotta stop with the lines.” “What?” You said in confusion, starting to wonder if he had lost it. You turned around to check the others weren’t behind you, and sure enough you were greeted with the same cold and empty house. “Start with the classics.” He shrugged, turning to face someone who should’ve been beside you.

You took a piece of courage and walked right in front of him, “Hey!” He didn’t even blink. You let out a chuckle in spite of yourself, giving him the middle finger, partly to test if he could see you, but mostly because it was a good opportunity. “Well boys, enough of the foreplay. Let’s do this.” He threw an arm up as though casting his powers onto someone, his arm going straight through you. Your smirk fell from your face when you felt his power shaking through your bones. “Real mature,” He tutted, starting to walk to the side of the house, “look boys I’m on the clock, haven’t got all day.” You watched him go, more focused than before, quickly following after him. When you’d reached the corner the rip in time was back, but no voices accompanied it’s presence. “The fuck...” You muttered, following him through.

As you did you were back in the apocalypse-world. “Interesting.” You said, still chasing after the Devil. “Sammy, hey! Where’s your big bro?” Lucifer asked the air. You tried to follow what was going on, but that was too difficult when you could only see or hear one of them. However, it seemed like you had a pretty good grasp of powers in this world. And, this was Lucifer. He had no idea you were there. If this wasn’t an opportunity, then what the hell was? You jumped, taken away from your thoughts, when Lucifer began to shake and stumble backwards. His chest was filled with bullet holes but no bullets appeared to be there. You realised this meant he was winning. Which also meant your family was in danger.

You concentrated hard, willing with all your might, and launched yourself at the devil, your hand turning to a fist as you braced for impact. Instead of his face, you hit the floor straight on and let out a groan. Your hand twisted a little as you did so, spraining the wrist and sending jolts of pain up your arm. “Well shit,” you grumbled, wincing as you pulled yourself off the ground, “let’s try that again.” Lucifer began to move forward and began hitting and punching and kicking someone. “Come on, Dean!” He shouted aggravatingly.

This time you felt of your Dad’s fear, your Uncle’s anger and Cas’ protection over this child. You felt Mary’s desperation to keep her boys safe and you felt your eagerness to show everyone you were capable. You let out a cry and with all your power you pelted the devil square in the face. “Shit!” You shouted on impact, feeling the sprain scream along your hand and arm. You rubbed the wrist with your other hand and watched as Lucifer stumbled in pure shock.

He spoke up after composing himself, “Woah! Who’s this?!” Dean must have been just as confused as he continued by saying, “No seriously who is this?” You smiled and went for a kick to the stomach, making him double over as he did so. Without a dominant hand you went for the shins and the crotch. This had to be buying them time at the very least, right? You felt your powers grow and grow. A surge of energy manifested into lightening as they began to strike down on Lucifer, targeting him and his surroundings.You felt the impact of them on the ground, rumbling the landscape as they crashed into the rubble. Lucifer scrambled to his feet and looked around to try and locate you. You let your pride take over and just a flicker of reality flashed in front of you. The lightening ceased and you caught a glimpse of Dean who turned his attention to you in amazement. You felt Lucifer’s glare on you. But Dean was gone again and so were you. “Y/N?” Lucifer called as he turned to try and find you again, “I saw you! As in Sam’s little baby girl? Well I gotta say this is impressive. You pack quite a punch.” He began to move about the place as if surveying for another glimpse of wherever you were. You moved from where you had been, careful not to abuse your powers to the point where you show yourself again. Through no doing of your own, Lucifer fell to the floor with a flash of red that reminded you of the alarms of the bunker. To your suprise, he chuckled, “Crowley!” You sighed in relief and backed away, realising they were going to seal the doorway. Crowley must have almost completed the spell by now. “Come on Crowley, you realise whatever you try you’re gonna lose.” Lucifer smirked. Just as he said this Crowley appeared in your vision, making you jump back in suprise. His body flashed and collapsed to the ground. You noticed from his stance, realising he must have stabbed himself with the demon-blade. He lay still and Lucifer, for once, looked as shocked as you.

You tore tour eyes from the body, remembering the plan to lock Lucifer in, and raced to the light in time to get back. You felt the warmth and energy of the doorway as you ran through it’s break in space.

—————— You gasped, sitting up in panic and breathing heavy. “Y/N? Hey, you okay?” Mary called, she was sat with Kelly in the bed next to you. Kelly has sweat pouring down her forehead and was screaming in pain. You winced sympathetically before jumping from the bed, managing a nod to them as you raced to where the light was. Your head throbbed and your hand felt swollen and bruised, but you had to make sure they made it back.  You watched as Dad and Uncle Dean staggered out of the other-world. Their eyes fell on you, your Dad racing over the moment he caught his balance. “Hey, hey. You okay?” “How the hell did you do that?” Uncle Dean asked, but you couldn’t even begin to describe it. “...Not sure.” You admitted, watching where the light was fading and unable to look away. Cas appeared just then, breathing heavily and bruised.

Before anyone could react a hand shot from out of the rip, sending an angel-blade straight into Cas’ chest. “No!” Uncle Dean shouted in panic. You gasped, tears forming in your eyes as you watched your friend fall to the floor. Lucifer was stood proudly behind him. Cas was limp and lifeless. You saw Mary appear at your sides in your peripheral vision and reluctantly looked away from Cas. Mary threw you a sad smile before turning to each of you. .“I love you.” She said, taking her last look. Then you realised what she was going to do.

Just as the light began to flicker away, Mary grabbed hold of Lucifer by the collar and shoved him back through the doorway, taking herself with him. “Mom!” Dad and Uncle Dean cried, sprinting after her. You watched as the light faded away to nothing, leaving behind a seamless landscape as though it was never there. The two of them halted  in front of where it had been, unable to doing anything. Dad composed himself as much as he could and ran back to the house, no doubt to check on Kelly. You watched with teary eyes as your Uncle fell to his knees over his friend, his back hunched in mourning. “De?” You whispered gingerly, taking a step towards where he knelt. “Don’t,” he snapped, not even looking up from Cas’ lifeless body, “just go.” Your feet began to backtrack and a few tears fell down your cheeks, but you couldn’t leave him like that. Even if he told you to. Instead, you knelt down next to him, resting your head on his shoulder and softly whispering, “No.” Uncle Dean turned and glared at you, but his eyes began to water and his lip trembled. He saw the tears running down your crestfallen face and let his tough gaze soften away to honesty. With a helpless breath in, he softly sighed, wrapped his arms around you, pulled you in close and rested his chin gently on the top of your head as he tried not to shake.

Part 25 (The End)

Masterlist I do not own these images (Tag list after cut )

@barbygrozna @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou @chelseypaigeake @impala-hunter @msdooos @starswirlblitz @fanboyswhereare-you @amorluzymelodia @d-willem @adidabach @blackjack-the-sword @spazzstiel @booksarecoolio @winchesters-favorite-girl @squirels-angels-and-moose @27bmm @practicallyawinchester @demonic-meatball @xsecretrejectx @bea789 @sarahthewriter55 @jiggysupernatural @trashforwinchesters @snazzyjazzyh @diesintheshower @intoomuchfandoms @the-chick-with-the-best-fandom @kbarnett1089 @riversong-sam @intoomuchfandoms @teamfreewill-67 @revwinchester @jensen-jarpad @itseverythingilike @avalon821 @miss-miep @lovelouisbabe @wcmanwcnder @graceless-dragon @sofy7012 @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou @oneshotsdeanshort @caroldanversinatardis @soulfiretheobsessed @whovianayesha @fandomsstolemylife00 @straightasdeanwinchester @soullessbabee @heytherecutie13 @spnkisum @clairedelalune @honeybeetrash @sammy-salamander @reddeputation @internationalmusicteacher @andyl394 @kysosa @stitchattacks @not-astounding @carryon-doctor-lock @wecantgiggleitsafandom

@nnoxygen @summerbee53 @lil-sister-winchester @itsrainbowunicornstuff @graceless-dragon @iamflanneltrash @clairedelalune @winchester-2301 @lavender-winchester @anarahma @mariahoedt @shewhoscreamssilently @livelikeawinchester @metaphysicalmisha @storyofawinchester @fandomsstolemylife00 @griff1ndor @mollykmccarthy @27bmm @archangelsandwarlocks @bea789 @imprettycool-i-guess @lovelife-tothefullest @jayankles @seninjakitey @stressedoutkitten @juneinthered @thyotakukimkim @susan-is-in-the-house @fountain-pen-of-youth @analisespn​ @fandomqueen2003

[lady-wallace]

Whumptober Day 31: Embrace

It’s the final day of Whumptober. Thank you so much to everyone who has read, shared, and reviewed my stories this month! I hope you all know it means a lot ^_^

~~~~~~~

Prompt: Embrace

Fandom: Supernatural

Links: Ao3   FF.net

~~~~~~~

Five Times Dean gave hugs when they were needed. Once he received one.

1

Kevin’s head ached. He’d hit another roadblock in the translation of the tablet and he was just incredibly tired. But when the safety of the world was on the line, how could he justify taking a break?

           Still, all he really wanted was to see his mom, but he couldn’t risk leading demons or angels to her. It was just all too much. Everything was too much.

           He buried his head in his hands, feeling his eyes getting wet.

           “Hey, you good, kid?”

           He jerked upright, seeing Dean standing on the other side of his desk. He quickly dashed a hand across his eyes. “I—I can’t do it anymore.”

           “Sure you can,” Dean said, not unkindly. “You just need a break. Come back to it with a fresh head.”

           “I don’t have time for a break!” Kevin cried, standing up and clenching his hands in his hair. “I feel like the whole fricken’ world is on my shoulders right now! How am I supposed to deal with that?”

           “Hey,” Dean said gently, stepping around the desk and settling a hand on Kevin’s shoulder. “Trust me, I know what that feels like. But remember, Sam and I are here to do the dirty work. You just have to translate that tablet, and you’re doing good. Hell, better than I expected. So what if you need a night off? Get some sleep, watch some Netflix—hell, eatsomething. I’ll go get whatever you want.”

           “But, I…”

           “Hey,” Dean said, smiling slightly. “The world’s not gonna end tonight, okay? Because I’m not gonna let it. You’re gonna sleep, and you’re not gonna look at that tablet until tomorrow.”

           Kevin sagged, some relief flooding through him.

           “Come here, kid,” Dean said affectionately, and to Kevin’s shock, wrapped him in a hug.

           Kevin sagged against the elder Winchester, feeling some of the tension wash out of him. Dean was right, the world wasn’t going to end that night. Maybe a break was a good thing.

2

The dream had been horrible, and Charlie sat panting in the chair for a long minute after she and Dean had been pulled out of the djinn’s hold. It was almost worse, having finished the game in the dream, having been forced to let her mother go.

           Tears fell down her cheeks in both relief that it was over, and terror at knowing what she was going to have to do next.

           “Hey, Charlie.”

           She looked up, blinking back tears and sniffling as she met Dean’s eyes. He was crouched in front of her, concern on his face, one warm hand wrapped over her wrist.

           “It’s over,” he coaxed, handing her a handkerchief, which she snatched and wiped her eyes with before blowing her nose noisily.

           “No, it’s not,” she said. “I—I have to let my mom go. For real. I know I should, but I can’t…I can’t…”

           She bent over and buried her face in her hands.

           “Hey, hey,” Dean said gently, reaching out to rub her back. “It’s gonna be fine. I promise. It might hurt for a while, but I think it will be for the best in the long run as hard as that might be to think about.”

           Charlie hiccupped a sob and finally nodded. “Yeah. You’re probably right.”

           “Come here,” Dean said as he stood up and pulled her from the chair, directly into his arms. Charlie melted into his warm embrace, pressing her face against his chest as her shoulders shook. Dean held her tight and his lips brushed her forehead before he rested his chin on the top of her head.

           “I’m sorry, kiddo,” he murmured. “About all of it. If there’s anything I can do…”

           Charlie shifted to look up and him and forced a small smile through her tears. “You’ve already done enough. Thanks, Dean.”

           He smiled back and held her tightly again and for that moment, Charlie felt truly safe and loved.

3

Castiel stood at the edge of the abandoned factory, looking out to see the dying sun. He felt horrible, for everything. His body psychically, and his being mentally, for saying yes to Lucifer, for helping to cause most of this…he could no longer be relied upon for anything. The Winchesters would do well to cut him loose. Honestly, he had been hoping to avoid all of this. He hadn’t expected surviving being Lucifer’s vessel, after all. The afterhadn’t occurred to him, and it was harder to bear than he had ever imagined.

           “Cas, you okay?”

           The footsteps stopped a couple paces behind him and Castiel couldn’t stand to face Dean. The fact that the elder Winchester—who had once been a friend, a brother, to him—was even speaking to him now was a miracle in itself after everything he had done.

           “I ruined everything,” he said stiffly. “I was stupid.”

           Dean huffed slightly. “You know well enough we’ve all made stupid mistakes, Cas.”

           “Not like me,” Castiel replied bitterly. “I should never have said yes to Lucifer.”

           “I started the apocalypse.”

           “That wasn’t your fault.”

           “And you were just doing what you thought was the right thing too,” Dean said and came over to stand shoulder to shoulder with the angel. “Look, I know part of it was because you’re going through some self-worth issues—and trust me, we’re gonna have a talk about that—but I also know that another part of it is because you didn’t want Lucifer to take Sam. And I would never trade either of you, you know that, right?”

           Castiel pressed his lips into a thin line, but a small flare of warmth starting in his check.

           “I guess what I’m saying is that, despite the stupid act, I know your heart was in the right place. And at the end of the day, in our lives, that’s all that really matters.”

           Castiel hung his head, a lump forming in his throat. “Dean…” he couldn’t decide what to say. Whether he was grateful, or even more ashamed that Dean had understood his motives so thoroughly.

           The hunter’s hand settled on his shoulder, making Castiel tense.

           “You’re our brother, Cas, I want you to know that,” Dean said sincerely. Castiel finally dared look at him, his own eyes pricking as he saw the honesty in Dean’s. “Never forget that you’re our family. I’m glad to have you back.”

           And then he simply pulled the angel into an embrace, the kind he and Sam shared when one of them had been in peril or come back from the dead. Firm, lingering, and full of relief. Castiel was stiff at first, but when Dean didn’t let go, he sagged, allowing himself to enjoy the comfort as he eventually hugged Dean back, head lowering to rest on the hunter’s shoulder.

           Dean let out a long breath as if he had been waiting for Castiel to return the embrace and Castiel thought, that, perhaps, he could learn to have more faith in himself again, if the Winchesters still did.

4

Everything was just so overwhelming. First Sam had let his brother go sacrifice himself to defeat Amara, then he’d been taken and tortured by the insane British Men of Letters, only to be rescued by Dean who wasn’t dead after all. And then there was the fact that their mom was back from the dead as well…

           It was a lot at the moment; after a couple days of torture and grief, and Sam was shutting down. It was just too much for him to take in at the moment.

           “Hey.”

           He looked up, startled to see Dean standing in the door of his room, a beer in hand.

           Sam looked up from where he sat on the bed, attempting a smile, but it didn’t make it, wavering on his lips as he fought to hold in his emotions.

           “You okay?” Dean asked, though his eyes said they knew they truth.

           Sam looked down at his hands, swallowing hard. “I thought you had died,” he said simply. And everything else…” He stopped, throat closing, eyes blurring.

           But he didn’t need to say anything else either. Dean knew exactly what was going through his head. He didn’t even try to say anything, simple walked into the room, sitting down on the bed beside Sam and turning to pull him into his arms.

           Sam sagged against his brother, shoulders heaving in a silent sob as Dean gripped the back of his neck, holding him close. Sam felt safe like he always did, always had. His brother was his refuge in whatever storm he happened to be weathering, and he was so, so grateful that he hadn’t lost him.

           He couldn’t put that into words at the moment, but he didn’t need to. Dean understood, and simply held his tighter.

           No words were needed.

5

Jack sat on his bed, arms wrapped around his knees as he tried to sniff away the tears. He couldn’t do anything right. His powers were too hard to control and he would never get the hang of using them. Cas and Sam had both tried their best with his training, but he could tell they were wearing thin. And he didn’t blame them. He was sure he was a difficult student.

           He heard footsteps outside in the hall before they stopped in front of his door, followed by a soft knock.

           Jack quickly scrubbed his face free of tears as the door opened and Dean stepped inside.

           “Hey, rough day?” he asked.

           “No.” Jack replied quickly, trying to put on a false bravado. “I’m fine.”

           Dean smiled as he came in and sat on the side of the bed. “Cas and Sam said they were worried about you. Said you took training kind of hard today.”

           Jack looked away as more tears welled in his eyes. “I…I have all these powers and I’m not good at them.”

           “Sure you are,” Dean said.

           “I don’t want to hurt people anymore,” Jack whispered, hugging his knees closer to his chest.

           Dean sighed. “Jack, look. You’re really powerful. And you’ve got to learn how to use those powers, but you don’t have to beat yourself up about it. We’re training you so you don’t have to feel scared about hurting people. Like when I taught you how to use a gun, remember? You treat it with respect, not fear, and when you do that, it’s just a tool. You don’t have to be afraid of your powers, you just have to learn how to use them with confidence.”

           Jack sniffed. “It’s just so hard.”

           “It is, but remember, we’re not expecting the world from you, kid. We’re just here to help you.”

           Jack glanced up. “Really?”

           “Yeah,” Dean smiled and leaned forward, cupping the back of Jack’s head. “C’mere.”

           Jack was shocked when Dean pulled him in against his chest in a hug. He’d never gotten one from the elder Winchester before. It felt good, warm and safe.

           “Come on,” Dean told him after he pulled away, squeezing Jack’s shoulder. “Let’s go get some popcorn and we’ll watch a movie. I think you earned it after today.”

           Jack smiled, and felt better than he had in a long time.

(1)

He felt tired and sick. The exhaustion from having Michael in his head for weeks, not sleeping, hardly getting any rest, had worn on him, and now that it was over, and the archangel had gotten free, decimating the majority of the hunters who had been living in the bunker, and forcing Jack to burn off his powers to save them, it was just too much. Dean felt like he was finally collapsing, his world was collapsing, and he didn’t know what to do.

           He didn’t realize he was literally collapsing until strong arms caught him.

           “Hey, Dean,” Sam’s voice murmured in his ear as his brother lowered Dean onto the steps that led into the library. “You’re good, you’re good.”

           “No, I’m not,” Dean forced out.

           “You will be,” Sam insisted, still holding onto him, a solid presence as Dean’s head swam, still reeling from his possession. He leaned instinctively into his brother, shamefully seeking any comfort he could get. Normally he would be embarrassed, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care right now, even when Sam began to rock him gently, soothingly.

           “Dean, Michael’s gone, everything will be fine.” That was Cas’ voice and Dean felt another figure settle on his other side, another arm wrapping solidly over his shoulders. “It’s over.”

           Dean wanted to believe it, and hell, he was starting to. But…

           “Jack,” he murmured. “He…”

           “I’m here, Dean, and I’m okay.”

           The kid’s voice trickled through Dean’s reeling mind and Dean felt a third pair of arms wrap around his waist, and all three of them, his family, were holding onto him, keeping him together, almost physically, when he couldn’t seem to manage that by himself.

           He didn’t know how long they sat there, and frankly, he didn’t care. He just knew that being enveloped by the embrace of his family made him feel whole for the first time in forever.

           Made him feel like he might be able to get up and keep fighting.

~~~~~~~

If you guys enjoyed Whumptober, I have a Ko-Fi where you can buy me a coffee, if you so wish ^_^

[casbeanwrites]

if the muse strikes u would u do destiel with 31 and 53?

bed sharing + mutual pining from the trope mashups

“This isn’t how I imagined we’d first share a bed,” Dean lets out without thinking about it.

A shocked silence follows his words. He immediately regrets them, but it’s too late, and now they float heavy between the two of them, tied up back to back on a small dingy bed in the room in the back of a vampire nest.

Let’s just say the hunt didn’t exactly go as planned.

“How did you imagine us sharing a bed?” Cas’ low voice breaks the silence.

“I didn’t,” Dean back-paddles. “I haven’t, I didn’t mean it like—”

“That’s too bad,” Cas murmurs. “Because I agree. This is not how I thought we’d first share a bed either. Although, considering the lives we lead, perhaps I should have.”

“How–? How did you, uh,” (God, when did Dean’s voice turn into a squeak?) “you’ve thought about us? In a – in a bed?”

“Yes. Many times.”

“Oh.” Dean attempts to laugh it off, but it doesn’t come out right. “Hope we were doing something more fun than this.”

“The bar is very low, but yes.”

Dean’s heart is hammering, and it’s not because of the twenty-five rabid vampires right outside the door, who promised to drain them slow and painful.

He feels Cas’ hands move until they meet his own. An index traces the curve of Dean’s thumb, until Cas is able to hook their fingers together. They’re still facing opposite walls, and are still about to very probably die, but Dean bursts with the most ridiculous giddy happiness he’s ever felt.

“Cas, I–”

“No.”

“You don’t even know what I’m about to say,” Dean frowns, craning his neck to try to look behind him. He can only see the back of Cas’ head. His hair is dirty and messy but Dean still aches to run his fingers through it.

“Yes, I do. And I already know.”

Dean closes his eyes. He still wants to say it. Out loud. At least once.

“We are past the deathbed love confessions, Dean. We’ve been there, and we’re not going there again. We’re not going to die.”

“But Cas, if we do–”

“We won’t.”

Dean would lie if he said he doesn’t quiver a little inside when Cas uses that decisive, rough tone, but it doesn’t change the reality of their situation.

“You’re human now. And we got no one coming for us, so–”

Dean can’t finish his thought. The door opens with a swing.

“How’s he doing?” Sam asks from the door.

“No change.”

Dean’s finger automatically finds Cas’ pulse point and he sighs. He’s been watching him breathe for almost 10 hours. The steady pulse of Cas’ blood under his fingers is the only thing keeping him from going completely insane.

As it turned out, Sam and Jack were alerted by some  hunters in the region that the pack that they thought was only six vampires turned out to be a large family. When Dean and Cas didn’t answer their phones, they immediately drove over and asked all the hunters around to organize  a rescue mission.

They made it out almost without a scratch. Except Cas, who got caught and might or might not have been bitten. His wounds weren’t deep, but he still lost blood and hasn’t woken up. Dean hasn’t left his side since, sitting in a chair or laying awkwardly on the motel bed, counting Cas’ breaths, checking his pulse, awaiting the dreaded moment when Cas might wake up with fangs and a hunger for blood.

Dean makes himself a little more comfortable in the bed and finds Cas pulse point again. He counts his deep breaths, one, two, three, four, five… And without meaning to, he drifts off to sleep.

“Dean?”

Dean groans. His nose shifts against soft skin.

Oh.

He pulls back and Cas’ face enters his field of vision. His expression is soft, a gentle smile on his lips. His eyes are shining despite the darkness.

His pulse is steady under Dean’s fingers.

“You’re awake,” Dean breathes out.

“Yes. And you’re in my bed.”

Cas’ smile is way too bright for this shitty situation, but Dean can’t help but mirror it.

“Yeah. Is it everything you dreamed about?”

Cas’ smile widens. His hand shift, threading his fingers with Dean’s.

“Close. Ideally, I’d have enough energy to do a lot more than just hold your hand. But this is still quite satisfying.”

“We got time,” Dean murmurs, despite the fact that he’s waited ten freaking years for this and he doesn’t know if he’ll survive waiting any longer.

“You could still kiss me,” Cas offers.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll do that.”

When they finally get home, it’s not even a question. Cas follows Dean to his room without a word, and they don’t make it out for almost a week.

They never again spend nights in different beds.

[fanfic-scribbles]

No Longer Pining

A/N: ::Rolls around in shameless Cas fluff:: Not sorry! Not even for the terrible title. This is part of @webcricket‘s “Supernatural Advent Challenge 2017” for the prompt “Scent: Pine”.

Summary: A bad encounter with a Djinn leads some truths to light.

Quick facts: Romance fic – Castiel/Reader – Christmas fic – Nondescript Reader

Warnings: Fluff!

Words: 802

    You hum to yourself as you place the next ornament on the Christmas tree. This one is a little heavier than most and requires an exact placement, but hooked deep on a strong branch (with a few branches underneath to cradle it just in case), you move onto the next, a light, silver ball.

“It smells very nice in here.”

You flinch, but breathe a sigh of relief when you don’t drop the delicate decoration to the ground. It makes it to the too-empty branch you had set your sights on, and you pause to glance back at Cas. His head is tilted back as he breathes in the smell of A-grade prime cut Christmas tree and you take a moment to appreciate the sight of his contentment before you get back to what you’re doing. Decorating is a slower event this year but you’re taking your time, trying to enjoy it.

“How are you feeling?” Cas asks and by his voice you know he’s coming closer. You try to tell yourself it’s no big deal, but you stiffen when he stands next to you.

“Fine. A lot better. Thanks,” you say and hang a couple more ornaments in the silence. Cas is still there, still next to you, and it’s bringing up things you’d rather do anything else than think about.

You turn away from him and suddenly there he is in front of you. You swallow hard and Cas grabs your outstretched wrist. He studies you too intently for your comfort and you try to pull away. Subtly at first, but he’s not having it. “You have been avoiding me. Ever since the Djinn. Why?”

It shouldn’t be hard to figure out. In fact, Cas is insanely smart and you know he knows why. But that doesn’t make it easy to admit to. “I’ve just been getting on my feet.”

“What did you dream about?”

You pull more insistently. “Nothing I want to talk about, Cas. Drop it.”

He leans in closer. “Did you dream of me?”

You panic and rip your arm away and you’re thrown off balance, wheeling and on track to fall right into the tree. Suddenly you come to a stop, panting, with pine needles pressing into your back and head, where Cas has caught you, his arm behind your back and his body far, far too close to yours. In his arms, you bite down hard on your lower lip and try not to remember what that felt like. How it felt to have him hold you while you bled out from a self-inflicted wound only to come to in a dingy old shack where his care and concern seemed so much more distant, where everything was suddenly so cold, so real. So utterly, painfully real

But his eyes soften now and he says, softly, “Do you really think your affection is so one-sided?”

You blink. “Cas, wh–”

He kisses you. He kisses you and for several nauseating seconds you think you’re back in that Djinn dream where everything felt so wrong, where you had Cas but you weren’t hunting and Sam and Dean were gone but you were supposed to be happy because wasn’t it everything you wanted? And it wasn’t. The fake tree in that fake life with that big house and fake friends and Cas who was yours but miserable can’t compare to the fresh, bright-smelling spindly thing behind you in an underground lair you share with two friends you would die for and an angel who finds purpose and joy in what he does with you and those friends. Fake Cas might have been ‘yours’ but he was a pale shade of the original, and even if you can’t have the real thing…

But he’s here, now, kissing you, and things are right and real. “Cas?” you whisper, afraid to break the moment, unwilling to let normalcy creep in even despite the pine needles tickling the back of your neck. Water lines up in the bottom of your eyes. “It…it’s okay. I’m sorry; I know it was a dream. I just…I…”

“I would consider myself lucky to be the one that could make your dreams come true,” he murmurs.

The tears fall but you laugh. “That’s, uh…that’s sweet, Cas. Cheesy, but sweet.” You sniffle and go to rub your face, but Cas catches your hand in his.

“It’s true,” he says and wipes your tears away. “And real.”

“Real,” you breathe. And pull him in for another kiss. He responds eagerly, pulling you close up against him, and you allow yourself to revel in your first kiss entirely untainted by the Djinn. With pine in the air, fuzzy Christmas music playing softly in the background, and a half-broken string of lights blinking haphazardly to the side, you know you’re home.

[rockhoochie]

No Apologies

(*Edit, previously titled “He Brings Me Sugar”)

Pairing: Dean/OFC

Warnings: Adult Content, Smut, Slow Burn, Somewhat Dubious Consent, Angst, Prescription Drug Abuse, Drinking, Knife play (very brief), Minor OC (sibling) Death, Language, Oral Sex (M/F receiving).

Summary: After losing her sister Anna to a demon, the Winchesters have taken Lexi under their wing. She studies and trains with them, tense friction quickly growing between her and Dean. When Sam and Castiel leave to take care of the demon that killed Anna without her, the levee of tension amidst Lexi and Dean breaks, flowing into something neither of them expected.

A/N: This is an edit of a fic I’ve posted previously. I meant to write a brief smutty one-shot and ended up developing the OFC a bit. Since the word count is 10K+, I decided to chapter it out. There may still be some errors, so please forgive me as I haven’t had this beta’d yet. Thank you for reading and as always, if you’d like to be tagged just send an ask!

**My work is not to be copied, altered, posted on other sites or otherwise used without my express written permission**

 Chapter 3

I had been living with Sam and Dean for about six months no, ever since my life had been turned completely and insanely upside down. Ever since my house had been burned down by a demon. Ever since that same demon had possessed my sister Anna and made her snap her own neck…

It had just been Anna and me. Our parents were gone, killed in a car accident almost two years ago. Anna had resolved to stay home with me after our parents’ funeral. They had left the house to us in their will – rather than try to deal with selling it, we moved in. Although sometimes painful, living in our childhood home again, surrounded by our parents’ possessions and essence was comforting in its own bittersweet way.

Sam had been only halfway through the exorcism when Anna was killed. Dean had been holding me from behind as I simply cried and screamed for my sister. I watched, helpless and confused and terrified as the demon glared me with eyes black as obsidian. It cackled with Anna’s voice, and unceremoniously twisted her head almost the whole way around. The demon left her then, in a thick black vine of smoke that reeked of sulfur, and making the most wretched squealing sound I had ever heard. Dean’s grip loosened on me as her body hit the floor. I had run over to Anna and held her, stroking her hair as my tears fell into her open, dead eyes, not caring that the flames licking the walls were gaining more and more strength. Sam had yelled repeatedly at Dean to get me out; Dean had to coax and scream and pry me away from my little sister. He had dragged me out of the burning house – literally kicking and screaming – as I watched Sam pour a copious amount of rock salt over Anna’s corpse.

Once Dean had gotten us a safe distance away and Sam had run out of the burning house, everything I had left in me vanished as I collapsed on the street. The brothers stayed with me the entire time, through the police and fireman interrogations, through the paramedic examination. The EMT’s kept telling me how lucky I was. I kept silently telling them to go fuck themselves.

Once the fire was out and Anna’s body had been wheeled away, all I could do was tremble, and repeatedly ask Sam and Dean what hell happened, what’s going on, what was that thing. They tried their best to calm me and explain. My head swam along with my tears as they told me that monsters were real, that they were hunters – the kind of hunters that kill the things that everyone else dismissed as fairy tales. They told me were demons real, angels were too, but God had left the building…and vampires and werewolves and even dragons absolutely existed outside of nightmares. At first, I thought they were insane, or that everything that had happened had caused me to go off the deep end.

They took me to their car, a black ’67 Impala, and showed me the contents of the trunk. Guns, knives, bullets, a goddamn machete. Dean reached for and opened a leather-bound journal, and flipping the pages slowly as I peered at them. They were full of hand drawn pictures of awful creatures, of handwritten information about each one – what is was, where it came from, and how to kill it.

Despite the obvious proof, I maintained the position that either I was losing my mind or they were certifiable lunatics.

Deep down I knew it was all true - nothing else could explain it. The weight of accepting that truth crushed anything that remained of my heart that night.

That demon had destroyed the only home and family had left. The only thing I was able to walk away with were the clothes on my back and the necklace I wore – a heart-shaped silver pendant with a single diamond embedded near the top, a single silver angel wing decorating the right side, and the words “Big Sister” engraved in simple print. Anna had one that matched – the only difference was the angel wing on the left side, and the engraved phrase “Little Sister”. We had found them in our mother’s closet, already wrapped in Christmas paper, tucked away amongst other gifts and boxes. Mom had always called us her angels on earth.

One of the EMTs had slipped Anna’s necklace into my hand. I slid the pendant off the chain, and joined it with my own. I silently promised my sister retribution. Whatever it took, wherever I had to go, I was going to destroy the thing that murdered her or die trying.

When Sam asked me if I had someone to call or someone I could stay with, I had shaken my head ‘no’. I had some friends out of state I could’ve called, but I couldn’t even bring myself to consider leaving. I needed answers about what had happened to Anna, and I was hellbent on revenge. I had told them I’d get a hotel for now, but Sam said he didn’t feel comfortable just leaving me alone. That demon was still out there somewhere, and chances were it was going to come after me.

That night they brought me to the bunker.

I sat at the library table in silence, watching Dean unpack his gear while Sam got a room ready for me.

“Hey,” Dean had said, “When’s the last time you ate anything?”

“Not hungry,” I mumbled.

“Not what I asked you.”

“I don’t know, sometime yesterday…”

Dean walked into the kitchen, leaving me to stare at the strange arsenal he had laid out in front of me - a sawed-off shotgun, several knives, bloody clothes and flasks – either full of holy water or whiskey.

He returned with a small plate and a fork, setting a piece of cherry pie in front of me.

“I’d rather have a drink,” I mumbled.

“Pie first.”

I cut a small piece, forcing myself to take one small bite after another until I finished it, trying to at least find some comfort in its sweetness. I licked the last of the thick filling off of my fork, and ran my finger along the sides of my lips to clean off any trace that may have remained.

When I looked up, I found Dean staring at me, his lips parted, his green eyes fixed on me.

“What is it?” I asked. “Is there some on my face?”

He blinked with a slight shake of his head and leaned back in his chair.

“No,” he said. “I just…I’m sorry for everything you went through tonight. I know how it is to lose family, and…”

“Thanks,” I whispered.

“Here,” he said, handing me a silver flask. “You can have that drink now”.

***

I had stayed in my room for three days after I got there, only leaving to use the bathroom. For the most part, Sam and Dean gave me my space. Sam would knock twice a day, come in and bring me food. Sometimes we would make small talk. Sometimes we would just sit there in silence, until he would put a movie on for me. He’d hold me while I cried, listen calmly when I screamed.

Dean had been present, but had kept himself fairly distant. On the morning of my third day at the bunker, I woke to find a pint of Jack Daniels and slice of cherry pie on my night stand. I knew that was from him. As great as Sam was about being attentive to my emotions, Dean knew what I didn’t know I really needed – sugar and booze. I washed down the pie with the whiskey, and spent the rest of the day getting blissfully drunk while watching old western movies.

On the fourth day, I finally came out of my room with a staggering hangover. That was the day I met Castiel, and experienced the glorious magic that was angelic healing. Cas had simply touched two fingers to my forehead, erasing the lingering physical pain I had from the night Anna died, healing the cuts and bruises covering my body. Even my hangover was gone. It was also the day I asked Sam and Dean to teach me everything they knew.

Sam read through lore and research with me, quizzing me on what the most common creatures were and how to kill them. He showed me the best places to look for the rare, odd things, and told me to who to call if I got stuck on something. I studied symbols, warding, summoning spells and credit card fraud. Sam was patient and warmhearted while he taught me, leading me to correct my own wrong answers and guiding me step-by-step as I practiced sketching Devil’s Traps. Sam quickly became like a big brother to me – that was the reason I picked him to take me to get the anti-possession tattoo on the back of my neck.

Dean led me in the more hands-on aspects of hunting. He taught me how to handle the guns, how to clean them, how to put them back together. He showed me the different bullets, the rock salt shells and the witch killers. He gave me a hunting knife, a lock-pick kit, and finally my own Glock.

We also spent time sparring, practicing hand to hand fighting. He never held back with me, saying that if I was going to have his or his little brother’s six, I’d better damn well know how to fight.

Dean was tough on me, critical, demanding perfection from everything he was trying to teach me. It only took about two weeks before started grating on each other. The more comfortable I got around him, the more he learned that not only could I take it, but I could dish it right back to him. That seemed to piss him off, and I found myself secretly enjoying it.

One particular day in the shooting range we really had it out. I was holding my Glock, trying to aim at the target and he would just not shut up. My stance was wrong, I wasn’t holding the gun the right way, what did I think this was, the goddamn movies? I finally cracked that day, screaming at him to get the fuck out of my face and back the hell off. I had stormed off, hiding myself in an archive room for the next several hours. When I finally returned to my room, there was a pint of Jack Daniels and a slice of pie sitting on my nightstand. By that time, I had learned how high pie was on Dean’s list of priorities. So, with a smile, I took the gesture as an apology and forgave him.

After a couple of months, I went out on some simple hunts with them – a spirit here, a poltergeist there. Sam was proud of me. Dean was impressed. I wanted to do more. Despite my insistence and protestations, they left me behind on the more difficult hunts - vampire nests, werewolf packs, things that hunted in twos, or anything demon-related.

Whenever they left me behind, I resigned myself to trying to track down the demon that killed Anna. I looked for patterns, strange sightings, any hint that the thing was still around. Sam and Dean tortured any demon they came across to get information before destroying or exoring them. Not one of them knew anything, or if they did, they weren’t talking. Dean had even summoned Crowley to interrogate him. After Crowley spent an eternity talking in circles and flirting with me, he insisted he knew nothing about my sister, or which one of his minions may have killed her. He did however, offer to make finding it out for me his top priority in exchange for my soul. Dean had cursed at him for that, charging at him with Ruby’s knife. Crowley vanished with a snap of his fingers before Dean could even get close to him.

I kept hunting, kept researching, kept hoping. I made it extremely clear to Sam and Dean that I was going to be the one to destroy that demon once it dared to show up again. They never protested, but never seemed too thrilled with the idea either.

It was comforting knowing I had people who had my back – hell, it was comforting to know that an actual angel had my back. Any time they left and hunted without me it filled me with dread. The Winchesters were the best at what they did, but if anything ever happened to them I’d be lost. I couldn’t imagine life without Sam, the brother I never had. I couldn’t even imagine life without Dean…the Dean I never had.

[profoundnet]

Profound Member Post - January 2020

Header by @cryptomoon​ and is available on merch from her redbubble store. You can use all those fancy emojis (and more!) on our Discord server!

The Masterpost is open for all creations by ProfoundBond members which are posted in their entirety during that month.

This months round up is extra special as PB celebrated its 2 year anniversary with a creation birthday bash. You will find submissions for this monumental occasion marked with a 🎂 emoji! Happy Birthday PB and thank you to everyone who makes this server, and our corner of the fandom so great!

MEMBER CONTRIBUTIONS FOR JANUARY 2020!

Featuring works by @nox-lee​, @nickelkeep​, @maleyah-givemetomorrow​, @banshee1013​, ArielAquarial, @castielslostwings​, @butterflydreaming-writes-fic​, @goldenraeofsun​, @jemariel​, @surlybobbies​, @blueeyesandpie​, @rauko-creates​, @foxymoley​, @maggiemaybe160​, and, @andimeantittosting​!

Masterpost below the cut.

noxlee - @nox-lee​ - noxlee - (Pillowfort)

Soft (E, 1.7k)

15x10 coda. Dean discovers that his new "normal" extends to his sex life as well. 

Tags: coda, established relationship, mediocre sex

 nickelkeep - @nickelkeep​ - nickelkeep

Tupelo Honey (E, 5.5k) 🎂

When one of his co-workers fall through on a photo shoot, Dean steps up to help out and cover it. Who knew that there was a such thing as a beekeeper's society? And who knew that a gorgeous blue-eyed man would be a beekeeper?

Tags: AU - Modern, Photographer!Dean, Beekeeper!Cas, Nude Photoshoot, Pinups, Cas acts like Endverse!Cas, Semi-Public Sex

Time Alone  (T, 1.9k) 🎂

Dean wants some alone time with Cas. The best way to do that? Find a case and tell Sam and Jack to stay behind.

Tags: Canonverse, Casefic, Salt and Burn, Established Relationship, Secret Relationship, Impala Kisses. 

‘Til I Found Salvation (M, 14k)

Finding your soulmate isn't hard when almost everyone has multiple soulmates; four, five even upwards of seven. It's rare to have only three soul marks and people who only have two? Sucks to be them. And the poor sons of bitches who only have one? They're the unluckiest of all. Dean Winchester knows a thing or two about being unlucky.

Tags: Canonverse, Canon Divergent, Soulmate Marks, Angst with a Happy Ending, Temp. MCD, Whump, Hurt/Comfort

Something to Talk About (T, 5.6k)

Charlie pointed up at her ear. "You don't hear that?"

"Hear what?" Dean closed his eyes and rested for a moment. He realized that music played in the background and started searching for the source immediately. "Wait, is that... Is that Zeppelin playing?

"Bunker, play 'Houses of the Holy,'" Charlie replied, a smirk on her face.

The first few haunting notes of the Zeppelin classic started playing, and Dean's head whipped around in surprise. "Where's that coming from? Did you buy one of those damned Alexa Despacito things for the bunker?"

Tags: Canonverse, AU - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Charlie & Sam ship Destiel, Home Automation, Domesticity in the Bunker, Pranks and Practical Jokes

Balance to the Force (E, 7.5k)

When needing their privacy in open areas, Charlie and Dean have no problem switching to an uncommon language - Sindarin, from Lord of the Rings. But when they start speaking it at Nerd Convention, does Dean bite off more than he can chew?

Tags: AU - Modern Setting, AU - ComicCons, Gratuitous Nerdiness, Polygot!Cas, Language/Accent Kink, Strangers to Lovers

Space Oddity (SFW) 🎂

Art for @maggiemaybe160​‘s fic Space Oddity

Maleyah - @maleyah-givemetomorrow​ - Maleyah

Where the Corporeal and Poetry Meet (E, 3.6k)

Part one of a series of ficlets exploring a season 9 divergence, where Cas is brought back to the Bunker and explores his humanity with Dean. "Straddling him as they make out, Dean whispers the suggestion that night. He binds Castiel’s hands with his own tie, which spikes Castiel’s breathing. He’s sure that if he still possessed his grace, his eyes would light up the dimly lit room in pale blue. His eventual orgasm knocks the breath out of him and it takes a long time to come back down into the safe circle of Dean’s arms.

They take it from there."

Tags: Human!Cas, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, Soft Dom!Dean, Soft sub!Cas, Poetry, Idiots in Love, Domestic Fluff

Where Kinks and Breakfast Meet (M, 3k)

Part two of a season 9 divergence series where Cas gets brought back to the Bunker and explores his humanity with Dean. "But he still wants to engage Cas. Fully. He’s only unwilling to put Cas at a similar risk, despite Cas’ persistent reassurances that his drop was related to the realisation that hit him mid-play. They do further research together. Into shibari. Into bondage. Into subspace. Drops. Both on the Dom and sub’s end. So he realises he suffered one in the wake of their moment and that he went about handling it the wrong way. A few days ago, Dean found a promising list, which he insisted they fill in to avoid a repeat performance. With everything they have been up to, Dean has faith (who knew?) they are compatible, but he wants clarity. He smiles at the feelings that loosens up inside his chest and huffs, rolling his eyes at himself."

Tags: Human!Cas, Kink Negotiation, Domestic Fluff, Soft Dom!Dean, Soft sub!Cas, switching implied, Sam Winchester Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester

Banshee1013 - @banshee1013​ - Banshee1013

Texas Sun (M, 4k) 🎂

Ever since Cas and Dean tied the knot, they have been driving Sam *insane* with their inappropriately located and utterly spontaneous make-out suggestions. So when he finds them looking at filming locations for the movie "Tombstone" in Arizona, he suggests they take some time (and give him a break!) and road-trip it. Dean plans the route and takes the long way 'round through Texas - all the more time to spend with his angel, and show him some sights along the way.

Tags: Fluff, Road Trips, Sam Winchester is Not Amused, Honeymoon, Grinding, Canon Related, Established Relationship

ArielAquariel - ArielAquariel

Your hand in mine, we walk the miles (E, 11.5k)

With the big day finally there, Dean is more than ready to walk down that aisle and marry Cas.

Tags: Wedding Fluff, Honeymoon, Established Relationship, Alternate Universe, Castiel is Claire Novak's Parent, Fluff, Domestic Fluff

castielslostwings - @castielslostwings​ - castielslostwings

Slide Away (E, 51k)

Since meeting and falling in love in front of the camera a decade ago, movie star Dean Winchester and his husband, celebrity photographer Castiel, have been the media’s darlings. From the outside, it truly appears as if the couple has it all: fame, fortune, fans and most of all, a profound and unshakeable bond that sees them through all the highs and lows. Behind the scenes, everything is not as it seems. Beyond carefully-curated sets of photos and filters, Dean and Castiel have been falling apart for years. Their marriage is essentially over, the latest victim in Hollywood’s merciless grinder. As a last-ditch effort to punch out some positive PR before news of their split breaks, the boys agree to do one last PR stunt—a recreation of the photos that made the world fall in love with them (while they were falling for each other). Will this plan drive their relationship over the edge permanently? Or will Dean and Castiel finally realize that their fans aren’t the only ones who have been fooled by all the smoke and mirrors? Misunderstandings, miscommunication, and mistrust are only the beginning. But if our heroes can push past those mistakes, perhaps they can learn that it's never too late to start all over again.

Tags: Miscommunication, Misunderstanding, Fake Relationship, Idiots back to lovers, Movie Star Dean, Photographer Castiel, Accidental sex tape, divorce, mutual pining, angst with a happy ending. 

looks_clear (chrysalisdreams) - @butterflydreaming-writes-fic​ - looks_clear (chrysalisdreams)

White Light // Black Water (T, 7k)

In 2019, the Baozhu, a pearl that granted the desire of Dean’s heart, changed the timeline from a particular moment in 2003. Dean is hunting alone when events set in motion before that year catch up to him.

Tags: Drowning, Temporary Character Death, Car Accidents, Baby Gets Hurt, Time Travel, Episode Related, Episode S8e12: As Time Goes By, Episode S14e300: Lebanon, Kale!Sam, Alternate Angel Lore

goldenraeofsun - @goldenraeofsun​ - goldenraeofsun

Dean Winchester and the Patron Saint of Blind Dates (T, 18k)

Dean Winchester's friends are a bunch of traitors. So he had a bad breakup two years ago and hasn't gotten back on the horse. Their intervention - a series of blind dates - can't be the solution. But if this'll get his friends to stop, Dean can choke down over-priced spaghetti, make forced conversation, and drink whatever random cocktail the weirdo behind the bar makes for him next. At least Cas has Dean's back. One word from Dean, and he'll make excuses for Dean to bail like a super awkward knight in shining armor.

Tags: Human AU, Bartender Cas, Dean has self-worth issues, minor angst, Benny & Dean friendship, minor Sam/Ruby

jemariel - @jemariel​ - jemariel

Spit-Polish and Shine (E, 1.5k)  🎂

You know how Dean Winchester doesn't wear shorts? Well. Sometimes he does. Unredeemed filthy porn on a car. Prompted by a PB botstat.

Tags:  Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sex on a Car, Exhibitionism, Masturbation, Anal Sex, Established Relationship, Sam Winchester is Scarred For Life

surlybobbies - @surlybobbies​ - surlybobbies

I Like the Sound of That (T, 1k)

In mid-December, Gabe hangs a sprig of mistletoe in Cas’s foyer. Cas, resisting the temptation to strangle his brother, snaps a picture and sends it to Dean. Take it down or leave it up? Idk dude. U trying to catch someone under there? Cas hedges. I don’t want to kiss anyone who’d only do it because of a plant. Fair enough. Just leave it up tho. U’ll break an ankle climbing up ur rickety ladder. Dw u don’t have to kiss me Cas puts his phone down and doesn’t reply. He indulges in two glasses of wine and valiantly tries to avoid thinking about kissing Dean.

Tags: friends to lovers, christmas fic, fluff, mistletoe, au

Lucky Enough (T, 2.5k)

Dean opened his mouth, ready to argue, but then closed it just as suddenly, deflating. He sighed and ran a hand over his face. “Cas, I don’t mean to be a dick.” “Then stop being one,” Cas said simply, adjusting the blankets around Dean a little more securely. There was a pause. Dean blinked. “You’re supposed to say that I wasn’t being a dick in the first place.” “I dislike lying to you.” Dean scowled. “Why am I your friend?” “Because I spend my holidays looking after you when you’re sick,” Cas said matter-of-factly, reaching out to touch Dean’s forehead. [Dean's sick over the New Year's Eve holiday, but it's fine because Cas has got a bed to share.]

Tags: holiday fic, bed sharing, hurt/comfort, friends to lovers, new year's kiss, cuddling

blueeyesandpie - @blueeyesandpie​ - blueeyesandpie

Beginnings (SFW) 🎂

The door to Dean's room in the Bunker, with Cas's tie on the doorknob

Tags: the bunker, pb100, we all know what's happening in there

In the California Sun (SFW)

A commissioned painting for Slide Away of Dean and Cas standing in a pool.

Tags: slide away, commissions, the tension amirite

Commission for Slide Away (SFW)

A commission for Slide Away of Cas running into Dean's arms along a corridor lined with photos of their rekindled romance.

Tags: commission, yay they happy

The Kiss Cam (E, 8k) 🎂

Dean's excited about the tickets he got for the OSU/UofM football match, but his boyfriend Crowley seems intent on ruining the day (and possibly his life) for him. When the kiss cam settles on them and Crowley pushes Dean away, a blue-eyed man they'd met in line is more than happy to fill the void. Loosely based on the headline/prompt "Woman Kisses Man Next to Her on Kiss Cam After Date Snubs Her."

Tags: manipulative crowley, non-explicit dean/crowley, minor sabriel, strangers to lovers, angst and fluff and e-rated shenanigans, NOT a sports story, pb birthday bash, collaboration

Say It Straight (T, 1.7k) 🎂

Something went wrong in that milk run to Kentucky, but neither Dean nor Cas want to explain what happened. When the truth does come out, it isn't at all what Sam expected...though really, why should he be surprised? 

Tags: PoV: Sam Winchester, Sam ships it, Idiots to Lovers, Canonverse, drinking to cope, PB Bot Prompts, first time, no spoilers past season 13

rauko-creates - @rauko-creates​ - FeaRauko

Sing Love (T, 2.7k)

Castiel comes back from a grocery run with Sam and overhears Dean singing in the shower. ***or*** That one where Castiel finds out that Dean might love him too.

Tags: canonverse, singing, idiots in love, first kiss, fluff, some angst, love confessions

foxymoley - @foxymoley​ - foxymoley

Hell’s Companion (G, 350 words)

This is for saltnhalo's birthday!

It's hard to write for someone so talented but I scoured PB for any prompts she had shown an interest in and apparently she 'needed this'! Lol So here we are!

Prompt by Sky: You’ve heard of witch!cas and familiar!dean now consider this upgrade to demon!cas and hellhound!dean - hellhounds, of course, having a secret human form in this au.

Tags: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Demon Castiel, Hellhound Dean, non-explicit/implied torture of random unnamed demon, mention of Boy King Sam

Roll for Dragons (T, 2.8k) 🎂

Dean is offered up as a sacrifice by his corrupt hometown. Written for jdragon as part of the Profoundbond birthday bash.

Tags: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Charlie Bradbury, Jo Harvelle, Dragons, Alternate Universe - Historical

Mithril (G, 1k) 🎂

Dean makes an interesting discovery in a bunker storeroom so he and Sam perform some experiments.

Tags: Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Weapons, The Lord of the Rings References, Men of Letters, Bunker, Soft!Dean

MaggieMaybe160 - @maggiemaybe160​ - MaggieMaybe160

Birthday Wishes (M, 3.5k)

Dean recalls his past birthdays before going out to celebrate his 41st.

Tags: Graphic Violence Warning. Heavy Angst. Anti-John Winchester.

Broken (M, 700 words)

Dean snaps out of a dreamlike state and found he's made a huge mistake and it's Zachariah's fault. All part of a plan to get him to say yes to Michael.

Tags: Graphic Violence Warning. Major Character Death Warning. Heavy Angst.

Demon Deals and Prayers to Angels (T, 4.5k) 🎂

Dean makes a deal with a demon so he can go back in time and change the future.

Tags: Major Character Death Warning. Heavy Angst.

Sleep Oddity (T, 1.5k) 🎂

Based on a prompt: "I just want to go home," said the astronaut. "So come home," said Ground Control. "So come home," said a voice from the stars.

Tags: Major Character Death Warning

Falling (T, 2k) 🎂  

Cas remembers all of the times that Heaven was against he and Dean getting together, and the repeated times he didn't care.

Tags: Graphic Violence Warning. Happy Ending. 

Memories on Display (T, 2k) 🎂

Cas is in shock after a battle and is going through memories to try to cope with loss.

Tags: Major Character Death. Grief.

andimeantittosting - @andimeantittosting​ - andimeantittosting

On a Breath of Snow (G, 4.5k)

Once, Castiel, Duke of Rexford, gave up the love of his life in the name of duty and honour. He has dedicated his life to raising his son Jack. Now, a fierce snowstorm brings Dean, Viscount Winchester back into his life on Christmas Eve. And as North Cove Castle's fires burn warm and festive, so do Dean and Castiel’s feelings of hope.

Tags: Regency AU, Getting back together, Christmas, Alternate history

[writings-of-a-british-fangirl]

This Spells Trouble (Dean Winchester X Reader; Team Free Will X Reader)

Title: This Spells Trouble Summary: After Dean, Cas and Y/N get hit by a lust spell, more than expected is revealed. Warnings: Minor sexual themes (no actual smut tho) Request: Hey, could you please write a Supernatural one shot where a witch casts a lust spell on Dean, Cass, and the reader? So Dean lusts for reader, reader lusts for Cass, and Cass lusts for Sam. Since Sam didn’t get affected, he finds the whole situation hilarious, and when the spell wears off, the three of you act a little bit awkward around each other for a few days. I really hope you write this, thank you for taking the time to read my request! xoxo

A/N: Think I'm going to do a second part of this, let me know if you want it xx

Want to read more of my stuff? >>Here<< OR >>Here [Mobile]<< [Got any feed back? I’d love to hear it!]

Want to see the upcoming requests? >>Here<<

Dean Winchester [+Team Free Will]~This Spells Trouble

The situation you found yourself in was actually quite ridiculous. For three very experienced hunters and an angel of the lord, it was even more ridiculous- and frankly embarrassing. You sighed and tried to think through the situation- and hopefully find a solution to the blatant mess of a day.

    It all began when you went on a hunt for a witch. Witches: you hated witches. Just like Dean, you had come to loathe them. Even though you knew that not all of them were bad, the bad ones were horrible. And, frankly just rude. I mean, what decent person hexes someone for revenge? You wouldn't hate them so much if they didn't frigging throw around curses and spells so much. Currently, you were facing the wrath of one of the worst spells you've ever been under: a lust spell.

    A frigging lust spell.

    Earlier that day, you had set out to hunt a witch with the understanding that there would only be one witch. When you had arrived at the seemingly normal suburban house, you had actually been faced with two witches each as mean as the other one. And, to put it politely, they had not reacted positively when you had tried to kill them. In fact, they had been quite pissed, and before they died, chanted off a curse that you are now suffering because of.

    So were Cas and Dean.

    They weren't pleased either.

    "This is ridiculous," Dean huffed, folding his arms across his chest like a toddler having a tantrum, "I can still drive!"

    Since Sam hadn't been effective, he had insisted on driving.

    "I wouldn't want you getting distracted by Y/N's (as you put it so nicely) soft, luscious lips," Sam laughed, teasing Dean as much as he could while he was in this vulnerable state, "Besides, I've been wanting to drive for a while now."

    "I still don't have to like it," Dean sulked.

    You could've sworn that Dean had a blush on his cheeks, and if you weren't currently being distracted by Cas' strong jaw line, you would've said something. Until now, you hadn't truly appreciated how gorgeous Cas was. From his sparkling blue eyes to his soft hair or caring personality: he truly was beautiful. You had subconsciously leaned closer to Cas in an effort to get nearer him, and you were not so subtly moving your hand slowly towards his own. Part of you recognised that you were staring shamelessly at Cas, but you couldn't help it… After all, it was Cas.

   Or maybe it was the spell.

   It was probably the spell.

   Despite the fact that Sam hadn't technically been hit by the spell, he was still affected as a certain angel had been suddenly awakened to the appeal of Sam Winchester. Yes, Castiel, the strong power angel of the Lord who had been the Winchester's friend for over half a decade now was lusting over him. Had it not been for your own situation, you would've been laughing your ass off- and no doubt so would Dean.

   Speaking of which, Dean was desperately trying to deal with the effects of the lust spell. He had resorted to gazing off into the distance out of the window; it was a desperate attempt to keep his eyes off of you and keep his mind off of the lust spell. He cursed under his breath as he caught sight of your gorgeous face in the wing mirror- your hair was brushed gently to the side, and your eyes were cast away from him giving Dean the perfect view of your features. Your eyes fluttered shut briefly before you opened them again. Without meaning to, Dean let out a love-struck sigh. He immediately regretted this as he could just hear the sniggers from his brother. After making a mental note to kill Sam later, Dean prayed for this experience- this ordeal to be over.

   "Can't you drive any faster, Sam?" you complained, also wanting to get back to the safety of the bunker.

   "What? You're not enjoying in this?" Sam teased, glancing back at you.

   "Shut the hell up, Sam," you snap back.

   "Alright, alright," Sam shushed, "We'll be home in… twenty minutes."

   You cursed to yourself, praying those twenty minutes away.

It was almost unbearable- the key world being almost. For you weren't dead. Yet. You had faced hell, the torture of the devil, and even faced a couple of hell hounds but nothing, nothing would ever compare to this journey. As soon as the impala stopped, Dean, Cas and yourself got out of the car so quickly, it was almost super human. Sam simply chuckled, and calmly got out of the car.

     "This is ridiculous," Sam comments, walking after you, "It's just a spell!"

     "Don't make me end you, Samuel!" you call back, fuming at the fact the damn spell still had a hold on you.

      Sam merely smiled, and watched the three of you head off in three separate directions to avoid the awkwardness of the whole situation. Currently, the older Winchester was facing the toughest time above you and Cas. Dean was fulling the brunt of the spell, having been the one to actually kill the witches and be in their line of sight when they died. And, he was suffering. He watched you walk off to your room, gazing at you like a lost puppy. It took him every bit of his self-control not to follow you and try to-

    Actually, he didn't even want to think what he wanted to do to you right now.

    He didn't want to imagine holding you, kissing you, slowly undressing you… No! He couldn't let his mind slip to that place; in this state, he'd never get out of it.

    "It isn't that bad, is it?" Sam asked, having caught up to his brother.

    Dean glared at him before taking a seat around one of the library tables and pouring himself a drink. He needed it: now more than ever. He look a large swig and waited for Sam to… go off and do whatever nerdy thing he usually did. But, he didn't leave. Dean groaned and turned to face Sam again.

    "Something I can help you with, Sammy?"

    "Not really," Sam said taking a seat, "I'm just wondering why the spell chose Y/N of all the people in the room for you-"

    "-Shut it-"

    "-I'm serious!" Sam defended, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say it was because you actually love Y/N."

    "Yeah, well Cas now has a boner over you, so I don't think it's entirely accurate, Sam," Dean scoffed, dismissing Sam's comment about him loving you.

    That was insane. Right? There was no way he actually loved you. It was just the spell, the frigging spell making him feel this, think like this. Dean wasn't being entirely truthful with himself.. He had had these thoughts about you before, but he always could brush it off. Until now.

    "Maybe Sastiel is real," Sam shrugged, before adding, "You should talk to Y/N."

    "I.. What if Y/N doesn't feel the same?" Dean muttered, "I mean if there's any logic to this spell, Y/N is head over heels for angel boy."

    "Dean…"

    "I'm going to bed, Sam," Dean told his brother, "My head hurts and its late- hopefully this spell is gone by the morning. Night."

    Dean walked back to his bedroom, for once leaving the drink firmly in the library. He made his way down the corridor, trying to convince himself that his thoughts weren't on what Sam had said. …The spell, the spell making him lust over Y/N- that was just a coincidence. It didn't mean anything.

    Definitely not.

Just as you were emerging from your room, hoping not to catch sight of Dean or Cas (or even Sam at this point), you caught a glimpse of Dean. Out of habit, you smiled at him, but all you received was Dean quickly slamming the door to avoid you. You sighed; this was terrible. Despite the fact, your mind was haunted with images of Castiel doing very… suggestive things, you were actually thinking of Dean.

   You continued walking down the hall, disheartened by your last interaction with Dean. This was absolute hell for him, you just knew it. And, for a second you actually believed you had a chance with him: stupid. Utterly stupid.

   "How you doing?" Sam asked, titling his head to the side as you walked into the kitchen.

   "Been better," you mumbled, reaching for a glass, "A lot better."

   "It'll only last a couple of days," Sam comforted, but it didn't help.

   "Can’t you make it go away quicker, Sam?" you pleaded, "You have a solution for everything! Why can't you fix this?"     You're practically screaming at Sam by this point. But, you're not really upset about the spell- its more than that. And, Sam knows it.

    "Hey, hey, hey," Sam soothes, "What's going on, Y/N? What's wrong?"

    "Dean," you sobbed, "It's Dean… You should've seen his face, Sam, earlier in the hall way when he saw me: it was pure hate. I know it. It was like… Sam, he hates me. He just slammed the door in my face to get away from me."

    You didn't mean to end up in the arms of Sam Winchester, but that's what you had to do when you could no longer stand by yourself. You felt completely useless and worthless at this point, but Sam was determined to make you feel better. After carrying you back to your room, he makes you a hot chocolate and fetches you a snack. You're thankful, but still feel sick from the look Dean gave you, from knowing the man you love hates you. Sam meant well, though…

    "Thank you, Sam," you murmur.

   "It's okay," Sam smiles, "Try and eat something, okay? You lost a lot of energy in that break down."

   You manage to smile.

   "Night, idiot."

   "Good night," Sam says before shutting the door and leaving you to your thoughts.

   Hopefully, Dean hadn't seen any of that and doesn't question you about it tomorrow. You don't want to deal with that. 'It'll be better tomorrow,' you think, 'It'll be better.'

[sassmastercas]

I hate you, I love you

Title: I hate you, I love you (part 2) 

Part 1 here 

Word Count: 1,324

Pairing: Cas x Reader 

Series Summary: (This is a very crappy summary I’m sorry XD) After a killer hunt with Cas, the Reader is starting to realize the true depth of her feelings for her angel friend. Instead of talking about it though, she takes the Winchester way out and tries to drink away her feelings, which of course doesn’t work. All the alcohol does is leave her vulnerable to strangers with mal-intentions and to a flood of feelings she can’t seem to shake. Little does the Reader know that this one night at the bar will change everything.

A/N:  I am so sorry if this isn’t as great as it could have been, it’s been such a long time since I wrote that I practically had to start back at square one. This was inspired by the song, I hate you, I love you by Gnash. Also, for those who don’t recognize this url, my previous was supernaturaltookover. As always, feedback is welcome and much much much appreciated. <3 Let me know if you’d like to be tagged, tags are at the bottom.

Warnings: None 

It had been over a month and a half since you last spoke to Cas, and over a month and a half since you last had a decent night’s sleep, even after long and brutal hunts. Every second you were left alone with your thoughts was plagued with theories about what Cas could be doing with Hannah, the things they could be complaining about regarding humans, the sights he would be taking time to see ,despite their eminent mission, with her by his side because such wonders would only be accessible by  angels. Whenever you managed to shake that dread away, all you could think about was how one night with Cas changed you forever; you would never love anyone with so much passion like how you loved him, nor would anyone ever hurt you as much as he did.

Every day was a constant battle to keep yourself from going insane, but luckily you weren’t alone in it. All your best friend had to do to expunge all the details from about what happened that night was use his puppy-dog eyes. They work every single time and on anyone, you were no exception. Sam had known about your feelings for Cas since the very beginning so telling him was no big deal, its Dean you still had to get in the loop.

The Winchesters were your family and you loved both of them to death, but you had always been a bit closer to Sam than you had been to Dean given that you met him first when Dean was in purgatory. Getting close to Dean definitely took longer but now you wouldn’t know what you’d do without him. Hell, not only has Dean saved your life more times than you could count but he’s even helped you get dates a while and a half ago, unknowing that all you really needed was a distraction from your true feelings. It killed you not telling Dean, but you knew that if he knew, he would spill to Cas. Even if you did manage to get Dean to keep his mouth shut, Cas would be able to sense that he was hiding something because of their “more profound bond”.  You would have avoided telling Dean entirely if you didn’t have a new feeling of dread caused by the fact that you hadn’t bleed in over a month and a half, since the last time you were with Cas.

Every corner of your brain was telling you it was impossible for an angel and a human to conceive, but your gut was telling you otherwise. Even though none of the signs were there, you still couldn’t help but feel…hope… believe that you could possibly be a mother. Ever since you choose to give up the 9-5 to save people from all the big, the bad, and the ugly in the world, you knew you had to give up the prospects of the apple pie life. But for the first time in a long, long time, you felt a little shroud of hope that maybe theres still a chance for you to have that life. And with that hope came the fear that you would have to raise that life alone.

All of this had just kept eating at you for weeks until finally one early morning while making breakfast you decided to put all your fears and doubt to rest with the stupid white stick with the pink end.

It was supposed to be a lazy Saturday morning, but since no news had popped about more “words of god” in weeks, everyone was getting pretty antsy. Luckily, Dean found a case not a few hours from the bunker so that’s where you were all headed around noon. But of course your thoughts wouldn’t let you sleep, so after slaving for a couple hours at 5 am in the kitchen making a pumpkin pancake mix from scratch, shredding potatoes for hashbrowns, and putting the frittata in the oven to cook, you decided it was the perfect time to take the pregnancy test: the boys were sleeping and wouldn’t be awake for a few hours, all of the breakfast prep was done, and once you knew everything was normal, you would be able to sleep comfortably in the car for a few hours.

The few minutes you had to wait after you peed on the stick felt like hours, all you could do was pace back forth in the bathroom, feeling the cool ceramic tiles on the soles of your feet. You hadn’t even noticed you were biting the nail of your thumb, probably ingesting the splotches of black nail polish that remained after weeks, until you heard the ding of the oven so loud it startled you out of your thoughts.

You ran to kitchen to pull your frittata out of the oven; there was no way you were going to let it burn, especially since you made it with extra bacon, just for Dean. Plus, it would only take 30 seconds to take it out and put it on the stove top to cool.

Lo and behold, a minute later you were back on your way to the bathroom to let a little white stick tell you what you already knew. As you pushed open the white wooden bathroom door, instead of finding the pregnancy test on the counter of the porcelain sink where you left it, you found it in Sam’s hand, his eyes what you imagined were riddled with sleep before were now awake with shock.

“What are you doing awake?!” you exasperated, “and give me that” you snatched the pregnancy test from his hands.

Before you took a look at the gray LCD screen, Sam half questioned, half stated, “You’re pregnant?!”

You looked down to see the  screen showing 2 black lines. You felt as if the ground had dissipated from beneath you and your legs just followed. Sam caught you before you hit the ground and pulled you into his chest, holding you tight. You didn’t know how long you just let your tears of happiness, joy, fear, and disbelief just stain his gray v-neck, but when you finally gained the strength to pull yourself together, you knew exactly what was coming next.

“(Y/N)… you need to tell Cas”, he coaxed.

Wiping a tear from your eye, you nodded in agreement, “I know, but I’m just not ready”. Just minutes ago you were ready to lay your life on the line to save a random stranger from the supernatural, and now you couldn’t even have a cup of coffee without worrying about the harmful effects of caffeine on the growing life inside of you. It was all so overwhelming you felt your eyes starting to water again.

“Hey,” Sam put his hand on your shoulder and stared you dead in the eye, “It’s going to be okay. I promise” he pulled you in for one last hug before he pushed you to your bedroom, assuring you that he could handle making the pancakes and telling dean that you just weren’t feeling well enough to hunt. Even though you were able to relax a little and even fall in and out of sleep for quite some time after Sam and Dean left, around midnight, you woke up to a feeling that you weren’t alone in your room.

You felt an energy creep up your body, shocking you awake just to find a badly injured, bruised and broken Cas standing on the far side of your room by the door. His trenchcoat and white shirt were stained red from blood. His once flawless face now had more unhealed scars than you did on your whole body. His eyes were flooded with pain and agony. When he opened his mouth to speak, his voice was unrecognizable. What you remembered to be strong and confident was now frail and raspy.

He only croaked two words, “Help…me…”

Tagging: @sis-tafics @d-s-winchester @deals-with-demons @teamfreewill-imagine@importantwordsgohere @sherlock44 @thegirlwiththemarkofcain

[dcficstoread]

Realistic AU

The Definition of Perpetual Motion by elsewhere-kels

http://elsewhere-kels.livejournal.com/44887.html#cutid1

Doctor!Cas

Summary: Dean Winchester was doing all right. He had a good job, a few friends, and all the people he loved were safe. He got by. Then he got a call from Sam in the middle of the night. Sam wasn’t all right, and it turned out he hadn’t been for a long time. Dean’s little brother had no memory of the last four years of his life and only pieces of years before that, and all Dean could think of was how he’d smiled as he waved Sam-who-wasn’t-Sam off to college. Sam didn’t want to take over Dean’s life, but he didn’t know where else to turn. Dr. Castiel Novak was “a bleeding heart” and he was beginning to realize that neither of the brothers had gotten through their experiences unscathed. 

12 Steps by gedry http://gedry.livejournal.com/70245.html Summary: The 12 Steps tell you to keep it simple, but Dean Winchester has never been good at keeping anything simple.  So, with the help and support of the core people in his life he’s giving sobriety his best shot, which even on a good day is a struggle.  But as he works at it he makes progress and starts to rediscover himself, and maybe find love with the new guy next door.

Precious by clueless_psycho http://clueless-psycho.livejournal.com/771975.html#cutid1

Soldier!Dean

Summary: Dean, Kubrick, Jake and Ash were US Special Force members stationed in Afghanistan. An attack got them separated from the basecamp and lost in the mountainous area. They came across a house, kept by Castiel who fed them, let them stay the night and tended Jake’s wound. Nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary until Kubrick was found dead upon leaving the house.

It's Only Love We're Falling In by zeppx **** http://zeppx.livejournal.com/32465.html

Nurse!Cas, enemies to lovers

Summary: Human AU. Castiel is a nurse. Dean isn’t a very pleasant person. Castiel and Dean don’t get along at first, then, naturally, like in most romantic comedies, things happen. Like unwillingly falling in love.

Close to Broken by darkforetold https://darkforetold.livejournal.com/6655.html

Hitman!Cas

Summary: It is 1932. Castiel, the adopted son, serves as the Sant’Angelo crime family’s hitman, a ruthless soldier who kills indiscriminately without questions. It is only when Castiel is contracted to kill Dean Winchester, his childhood obsession, that his world is torn asunder. Suddenly, in the face of the man he once loved, Castiel begins to doubt himself and nothing can prepare him for how quickly everything seems to fall apart.

Always with you by DeanaWinchester http://archiveofourown.org/works/261950/chapters/410182

Stableman!Dean, Horse trainer!Dean, Lawyer!Cas

Summary: A fairytale for adults about people, horses and the important things in life. When Dean, a stableman and horse trainer and Castiel, the top-notch lawyer with issues meet, sparks fly. Castiel comes to the estate to take a pause from his everyday life, and possibly turn it into a different direction. Meeting Dean and falling in love with him turns it completely upside down, but Castiel doesn’t mind it one bit.

A Better Method of Pretending by ricketyhands http://ricketyhands.livejournal.com/5067.html

Journalist!Cas, Dean Smith

Summary: Dean is young and a hard worker living in shitty place near Cleveland, with one plan - to get his boss's job. When the possibility is complicated by a journalist by the name of Castiel, Dean has to learn to work with the writer and make nice. Of course things get complicated and Dean isn't sure to balance how he feels about work, this relationship, his best friend Sam, and how Castiel is kind of an enigma, though every time they get closer his barriers seem to weaken. But where does Cas draw the line, and how does Dean figure out what the hell he wants?

Convictions by gedry http://gedry.livejournal.com/224287.html

Thief!Dean

Summary: Dean makes a living in high class home invasion. Dean's careful, he never wanted anyone to get hurt. But when he discovers Castiel still at home while he and his team are robbing the house everything changes. Dean pays the price for his misdeeds but somehow, along the way, he manages to make a friend out of Castiel. A man still struggling with his own kind of incarceration. Their relationship offers Dean some comfort, but once he's done serving his time questions still remain. Are they friends, or something more? Can they make a life together out of the ashes of their old ones, or are they both still serving their sentences?

A Drop in the Ocean, a Change in the Weather by 9_of_clubs http://9-of-clubs.livejournal.com/35243.html

Titanic fusion

Summary: Titanic AU/fusion - For Dean Winchester, the Titanic is nothing more than a way to get to his brother in America. For Castiel, it's the ship that's taking him away from his childhood home, and everything he's ever known, to start a new life across the ocean. Neither of them ever expected to fall in love on this trip, but sometimes fate is stronger than expectation. Still it's no easy journey, not while they're separated by class, not while Cas is in love with someone else, and certainly not while the floor is sinking underneath their feet.

Things I should have known by wolfrider89 http://wolfrider89.livejournal.com/74031.html

Mr. & Mrs. Smith fusion

Summary: Castiel Novak has managed to keep his personal life with Dean Smith separate from his professional life as a secret agent for three years. He expected to continue living a series of detestable but necessary lies cloaked in precarious alibis for the rest of his life, and then his new assignment threatened to throw all of that out the window: Kill Dean Winchester.

Mon Mercenaire by knut_the_kitten http://knut-the-kitten.livejournal.com/2435.html#cutid1

Summary: Mercenaries AU. Dean drifts through life, changing job and country every few months, on the run from his past as a mercenary leader. When war, blood and betrayal catch up, old obligations compel him to get back to hell; in his shadow walks Castiel, the man sent to bring him back. After serving half his life in the Foreign Legion, Castiel knows nothing but obedience; yet as his loyalties falter he offers Dean a chance at redemption.

Mr. Know-It-All by baba_o_reily http://baba-writes.livejournal.com/8003.html

Journalist!Cas, Photographer!Dean

Summary: 1964. Castiel thinks he's got a good enough life--he's married to the greatest girl in the world and he's got a great job writing for the San Francisco Chronicle. Everything is exactly as it should be and he's pretty sure he's happy. Which is, of course, when a new photographer named Dean comes along throw a great big wrench in the cogs.

Trying to Describe the Kingdom by miscellanium http://writingidk.livejournal.com/8592.html#cutid1

Summary: In the year 1944, after their father dies, Dean and Sam are left with the remains of his infantry team deep among the forests and rivers of France where it can be hard to find a way out. Supplies are running low, Axis forces are pressing in all around, and there's a plane following them. The question of whether the pilot is friend or foe is answered when he crashes, saving Dean from an ambush, and now Dean has a choice to make. He can help Castiel and his brother get back to Switzerland, or he can press on with his father's covert mission, worries about Sam's loyalty aside—or he can go home.

We Became the Gravel Beaneath the Tires by noellabear http://noellabear.livejournal.com/13744.html

Summary: College!AU in which Dean hasn't seen Sam in months- or heard from him in weeks. It's hard staying in touch when Dean lives across the country and his brother's a genius studying law, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't miss the stupid Sasquatch. Cas, who's tired of his cookie-cutter lifestyle and is Dean's best friend/roommate, sees it as a perfect opportunity for a road trip. Despite Dean thinking Castiel has gone absolutely insane, they embark on a journey across the United States- the road a catalyst for finding things in themselves and each other. Crappy motel rooms, roadside diners, and cigarettes, become the perfect mix for falling in love, but roads aren't complete with twists and turns, and cheap wine on a warm, spring night might not have been such a great idea.

Drop Your Expectations (And Your Pants) by trickylady http://archiveofourown.org/works/543095

Summary: This is the story of how Dean fell in love with his brother's boyfriend, and how Sam let Dean have this one thing he wouldn't ask for.

Cheeseburgers and Pie by kenzigoss http://kenzigoss.livejournal.com/1594.html

Summary: Not only does Dean Winchester have to finally man up and go to college, but he has to deal with a strange roommate, Castiel Novak. Things get easier for Dean as he befriends Castiel and realizes that maybe he's cut out of this college life afterall. When tragedy rips the two apart, and fate brings them together agian after ten years, it's up to Castiel to see if time heals all wounds.

Between Want and Need by Padapuppy http://archiveofourown.org/works/551610/chapters/982758

Summary: Castiel's life is in shambles, but he's got control over it. The sex, the drugs, it's all he's got, all he knows. Everything is about control for him, getting what he needs, putting wants aside. It's not until he meets Dean that he realizes that control might be overrated. He's going to have to suffer a loss to finally get where he needs to be, and he'll get out better than okay. Things don't go easy from there. He's faced with a decision and he'll have to figure out if what he wants is more important than what he needs.

Adolescence at an All-Male Boarding School by signe_chan http://signe-chan.livejournal.com/39413.html

Summary: Dean doesn't want to go to a stupid boarding school. Sam loves the stupid boarding school.

Show Me How To Love (And I'll Show You How To Live) by slutpunk http://archiveofourown.org/works/542024/chapters/963484

Summary: Dean's broken and he's 95% sure he's always been broken. He's a Fed because he used to believe it would do some good and now? He's not so sure. Castiel knows he's broken and he can't be fixed. He does as he's told, kills who his uncle tells him to kill, and pretends that the nightmares don't wake him up anymore. But they find some solace, some peace in each other, until the day it all comes crashing down.

Hymns of Angels Sound Like This by bodiesnotourown and azimmermann http://bodiesnotourown.livejournal.com/2519.html

Summary: Dean is a new student, Castiel Milton and family have a band. Castiel is in a relationship he hides from his family, but starts to fall for Dean when they meet at a concert. Angst ensues, interrupted by the antics of the Milton kids who can’t mind their own business and trouble that seeks to destroy what they have before it can get off the ground.

Humble Pie by The Homeless Poet (orphan_account) http://archiveofourown.org/works/528214/chapters/935480

Summary: Sam and Dean Winchester are professional lawbreakers and criminals. That being said, they're awfully good at minding their own business and staying out of trouble. That is, until they're landed with an escaped slave and what might just be the story of their lives. On the run and with enemies on every side, all Dean can think about is finding a way to keep his brother safe and get the cops off his tail. But things are never that easy, and this particular complication is one of the heart, and comes ready-packaged with a pair of very blue eyes...

As The Sparrow by hubrisandwax http://archiveofourown.org/works/1035865?view_adult=true

Summary: It’s 1947. Dean is an ex-marine fighting crime and a very different sort of war to the one he faced in the Pacific as a detective on the streets of LA. This city isn’t all the glitz and glamor it’s made out to be, however, and Dean finds himself tugged in to a world of life-threatening unknowns when Daphne Novak’s body is discovered. Castiel Novak, her husband, was one of Dean’s battalion mates in the war, and he's just as deadly and dangerous as he was two years ago when he saved Dean’s life during the Battle of Okinawa. Except now he’s wanted for his wife’s murder, and Dean just doesn’t believe Cas is capable of that. Is Cas really who he says he is, though? And what will Dean have to sacrifice in order to repay the debt he feels he owes?

Big Machine by anubis-s-j http://anubis-s-j.livejournal.com/22846.html

Summary: Dean Smith is an intelligent, successful businessman who is perfectly content with his life the way it is. That is, until he meets Castiel Novak. Castiel is strange and unlike anyone Dean has ever met before, but he can't help but be drawn to him.

Death doesn't have to be a lonely business. by ladyrocketdale (Maiucha) http://archiveofourown.org/works/1036502

Summary: Dean Winchester's life went downhill in a year, or, actually, more than ten years ago when his family was taken away from him. He's ready to continue living hiding on the streets, faceless and forgotten as many others; but Castiel Novak finds him, contacts him and offers him a way back to life and, maybe, to himself.

Or Something by ScarletPhoenix http://archiveofourown.org/works/997876

Summary: The past year of Castiel Novak's life is definitely the worst. His brother dies, leaving him with custody of his young niece, Claire, prompting his long term boyfriend to leave him. But everything starts looking up when he moves in next door to single father, Dean Winchester.

A Song For Coming Home by ourdivineashes http://archiveofourown.org/works/1044572

Summary: Ten years ago, Dean was left devastated by the sudden departure of his best friend, after he confessed that he felt something more than friendship for Cas. Now, with a decade of bitterness and anger built up inside of him, Dean is surprised to find his old friend returned to their small farming town. Cas says that he is here to make amends, but Dean is unsure. With storms rolling in, Dean struggles with holding onto his anger, or letting go and letting Cas back into his life.