#i did get a few plot twists spoiled to me while looking for information on other characters

[morgenstern16]

the one nice thing about trails being relatively obscure in the west is that i had almost none of the many plot twists spoiled to me through osmosis, and so i got to go through the entire series mostly blind.

the only issue is that i want to preserve that experience for anyone else interested, so whenever i talk about it on discord with other trails fans any serious discussion of the plot turns into a CIA document

[nearestapothecary]

Don’t Worry Darling - Review (and how I'd fix it)

This post contains spoilers for Don't Worry Darling.

Normally I don’t say this but… this movie was BAD. Bad as in like bad-bad. Not so-bad-it's-good, but just regular bad. If you watched the trailer (like I did) then you were probably expecting a very different movie than what you got. There is a twist in this film that not only does not resolve the things that are supposed to be confusing but in fact makes them make even less sense than if they simply hadn’t included the twist.

I feel I need to talk about the twist in depth here so this is your first and only spoiler warning.

Before I get into the things I disliked (which is a lot) let me give some praise to the film first. I think Florence Pugh and Chris Pine's performances were outstanding in this film. (Harry Styles was not good.) This film looked beautiful the set design, costuming and colours really evoked the feeling of the 1950s. I thought the liscened music fit the film (although it was jarring how much there was). There were a couple really amazing looking scenes that I was genueinly taken by. Other than that I haven't got much else to praise about the film...

Okay so I’m going to do a quick recap of the plot if you’ve not seen it and you care about not getting the film spoiled then you really should have stopped reading by now, and if you have then you can count this as a refresh:

We follow a 1950s housewife (Alice) as she goes about her life at the secretive and secluded town of Victory. Her husband Jack works for the Victory company (owned and controlled by a man named Frank) and can’t tell her what it is. The mystery is then furthered by none of the women being allowed to go out to “HQ”. We get hints as to what the work might be with the occasional earthquake and are told they are working on “progressive materials”. As far as we can tell Alice is happy, her life is good,she has enough time to spend her time doing things like shopping and relaxing with her friends, fresh food and clean water and a sizable home, loving husband, a good sexlife, absolutely everything you could want (as a woman in 1950s America).

So when she sees a plane falling out of the sky near HQ and rushes over to help and then the next day sees her (former) best friend (Margaret) slit her throat and fall off the roof of her house you can see why her life might fall apart. (Before I continue though I must admit that the scene where she goes to HQ is probably the best in the film and I genuinely smiled at it.) However she didn’t see her best friend slit her throat and fall off the roof of her house (Jack tells her that she just saw her trip in the garden) nor did she go up to HQ (she was in bed the whole day), it was just a nightmare she woke up from… to Jack cooking (badly). This is where I thought the film was gonna remain what it told you it was in the trailer. A film about a secretive organisation that the men are a part of and that then gaslights their wives when they get too close to finding out (and it continues like that for a while).

There are a few more gaslighting scenes in the film, the company doctor visits and prescribes her medication. Her and Jack refuse the medication and she starts getting worse, thinking about their old life before Victory (which she struggles to remember any of). Afterwards she steals a document out of his folder which labels her (dead) best friend as a security risk. Things begin to become more and more hectic from this point. She is gaslit at dinner, she somehow recognises a stripper from a dance class that no one else seems to remember Jack dances on a stage after getting a promotion.

So what has all this been building up to? All this tension, all the loose pieces of information: (Here’s some I didn’t mention: eggs with nothing inside them; Margaret’s son disappearing, no one else seeing a plane crash; the question of where all their food comes from; why did Frank say that no one would believe her?; Why did men in red jumpsuits drag her away from helping Margaret?; Where did she hear that tune that she keeps humming?) Where are we going with this? Alice convinces Jack to leave with her (as she needs him to drive) but when they get in the car they don’t move. Jack tells her that he tried to stop what was about to happen and then… she is dragged out of their car by men in red jumpsuits. She’s taken down into an operating theatre where she is fastened to a gurney and then administered electroshock therapy until… we match cut to… her as a doctor in the near future. 

Now if you’re like me (and half of the audience who was with me) you’re thinking:

What. The. Fuck. (and not in the good way)

The reason why I made you read through all of that is so you had the same emotional experience as I and everyone else who had gone to watch this movie had.

Now let me try to explain this. Alice and Jack are a real couple in the real world (near future) but are extremely unhappy (at least that’s what Jack believes.). Alice works 30 hour shifts at the hospital and Jack sits at home listening to podcasts (actually). So he does the rational thing and essentially kidnaps and imprisons her in (drumroll please)... a fucking simualtion.

This twist makes no fucking sense. 

Not only was I excited to find out what they were hiding in Victory HQ only to find out it was actually nothing because the world doesn’t exist but I also started to question every “clue” that we had been given. 

Why bother programming the earthquakes in? Why was there a plane? Why did the eggs have nothing in them? How do they get drunk, feel full from food or have pills work if they are in a simulation? How does ageing work? How does being pregnant and giving birth work? Why is there a big thing about promotions if there isn’t even a company? Why did Frank bother programming only one or two backstories for how couples met?

These questions get worse and worse as they begin to explain the rules of the simulation. I’ll sum them up quickly:

If you kill a man in the simulation he dies in real life.

The children aren’t real, only simulated.

The men have to leave everyday to go back to the real world to make enough money to afford the simulation and take care of their wives (who are chained up in bed).

People choose what their nationality is and what wife they want.

These raise the questions: Why is it only mentioned that “men” die in real life and not everyone? Why do they need to even have their wives chained up if they can simulate people already? 

This twist took a good movie and made it bad. It took a film that had no sci-fi elements and made it the main focus of the film without thinking through the science of its science fiction. 

Now I don’t want to only complain so here is what I think could be changed to fix a couple of the big problems in Don’t Worry Darling. I think if we removed the simulation aspect of the film and instead put the women into a secluded area of the real world then many of the questions that surround pregnancy, ageing, food and drink are all solved. If we change the earthquakes to be planes flying overhead everyday (we could even say that they are carrying the progessive materials that the men are supposedly working on) then it explains where the plane that draws Alice out to HQ came from. Of course these changes mean that Bunnie’s character motivation to be there also needs revising but personally I felt that most of this film relied on the shock factor of the simulation and if the simulation doesn’t make any sense then neither does the rest of the film. Maybe they should have just left the script in the pile they found it in...

[secret-engima]

So I started RWBY (thanks for that, it’s all from you), and I gotta say I love Yang. So are there any Dragon!Yang rambles you have? What about lunweiss too?

It’s been a while since I enjoyed a show like this, it’s nice

Hi!!! Welcome aboard!! And not to taint your opinions but just- idk I feel obligated to warn you that while I 100% recommend V1-V5, V6 is emotionally hard (and has plot points I am Not Happy With) and V7 is just ... a train wreck. A wonderfully animated, woefully badly written train wreck. And I’ve yet to watch v8 so I have no idea what’s going on THERE beyond Oscar being a Suffering Sunshine Boi.

But yes! Headcanons!!!! Also apologies for any spoilers I mention for the show in these? I don’t know where you are in the show and I’ve already talked a lot of spoilers I’m sure XD.

Dragon Yang:

-Yang is excited to go to Beacon actually. Nervous and dreading it, but excited. She’s learned over the two years since returning to Remnant how to manage her strength and limit her lethality, how to hide the worst of her ... odd behaviors. She wants to make new friends, and she’s hoping to see Velvet there (Yang transfers to Velvet’s combat school in this AU and makes friends with her by accident). But she’s also dreading the “living in dorms with strangers” thing.

-Then she learns Ruby is getting to join early and she oscillates between HECK YES SIBLING TEAM HERE WE COME to MY BABY SISTER IS NOT READY FOR THIS. PROTECC. Of course, she’s been training Ruby these last two years too, because she’s afraid of her own strength but she’s more afraid of Ruby being unprepared for the dangers of the world. Ruby will never be a STELLAR hand to hand but she can fight mean and run away and her parkour skills have reached ninja levels even without her Semblance.

-Now she just has to get on the same team as her sister.

-She’s honestly ... highly amused by the initiation exam? Like- yeah sure fling the DRAGON SLAYER off a CLIFF and expect her to be alarmed. Psh.

-She means to track down Ruby and is will on her way to doing so when she runs into Blake first. That’s ... a little annoying. She doesn’t even know this girl’s name (Yang never dragged Ruby off to make friends during the pre-initiation sleepover thing in this AU) but it’s not Blake’s fault so.

-Also, on the note of Blake lemme just sidetrack to point out something interesting in Yang’s mentality. She can tell the moment she smells Blake that Blake is a Faunus.

-She still doesn’t think of her as a Faunus. Because- to Yang, she genuinely doesn’t .... really understand the difference between Faunus and human? To her everyone is human, some of them just have extra bits and more useful senses. And this is a TOTALLY UNCONSCIOUS MENTALITY from back when she was living on Earthland. Because in Earthland, people can look really, really weird (especially in the magic community) and yet they are all still called “humans” and are still treated perfectly normal. Like this girl from canon Fairy Tail show-

That tail and those ears are 100% real, they move and react like actual limbs in the anime, but they weren’t always THERE. When that character was teeny, she looked like a “normal” human, but her magic is feline oriented and so over the years those traits GREW on her. And literally NO ONE BATS AN EYE IN THE SHOW. Not even the people who knew her when she was tiny non-cat human child. She’s far from the only example, but she’s the easiest to think of especially in regards to the Faunus thing.

-So yeah, Yang smells feline traits on Blake and just- doesn’t even react. Doesn’t mention it to anyone because her brain skips right over “cat ears = Faunus” in this world and goes straight to “ah yes, my new 100% nonmagical human teammates. My Sister, Ice Child, and Girl With Decent Hearing Thank Goodness”.

-So while Blake thinks she’s keeping her Faunus traits a secret from her whole team, her partner Yang is just vibing off to the side, perfectly aware that Blake has cat ears but still thinking of her and every other Faunus as regular ol’ humans.

-Yang doesn’t abandon Ruby at the entrance to Beacon either, so Weiss made a ... bad impression on Yang very quickly for yelling at Ruby’s sister for an accident. Yang shut that whole thing down pretty fast, but Ruby was still feeling humiliated and nervous and Weiss was prickly and embarrassed by Yang’s blunt opinions.

-Yeah it’s a good thing they can bond via Nevermore killing because otherwise this team would be way more dysfunctional than it is in the first few days.

-Yang has mixed opinions on Team JNPR. It is painfully clear Jaune has no idea what he’s doing, but frankly she has her hands full with her own team atm and no time to try to gently bully this boy into proper training. She makes a note to do it later. Pyrrha smells lonely and she’s a sweetheart. Nora is wayyyy to prone to getting into Yang’s (and everyone’s) personal space. Ren is nice. He has manners and he smells of tea.

-There’s a scene early on where this guy called Cardin bullies Velvet for her ears by grabbing them and pulling them and I’ve never like how none of the main characters or anyone else try to hELP.

-Ergo, when that scene happens, Yang promptly gets up, twists Cardin’s wrist so that he lets Velvet’s ear go, then picks him up by the back of his shirt and flings him right through the farthest cafeteria window she can aim at from this angle. When his team of fellow bullies take it poorly, she proceeds to throw them through other windows.

-Her only defense when taken to the Headmaster’s office to face down Glynda and a very bemused Ozpin is that 1. at least she didn’t break their jaws or bones like she did the first time she caught someone bullying Velvet, 2. Professor Goodwitch can fix the windows with telekinesis to it’s not like the school was actually damaged and 3. if the Headmaster can fling people off cliffs for initiations, she can fling people through windows for being moronic bullies that needed spanking when they were five and spoiled but never got it.

-Goodwitch is not amused. Ozpin, on the other hand, is highly amused by trying not to show it. Yang can smell it and sense it in his magic tho.

-Yang, later in the dorms, more to herself then anyone, “So Velvet was born with one more pair of ears than most humans have, that’s no reason to be a jerk. I mean come on, he was born with a dumb face but I left him alone until he made the first move.”

-Blake: *vague staticky brain noises of confusion* “She’s ... a Faunus.”

-Yang: Gesundheit.

-Yang meeting Ironwood is gonna be-

-Fun.

-Because she first meets him in v2/v3 when he shows up for the Vytal Festival and brings an army with him and it makes Yang’s instincts SCREECH. This is OZPIN’S territory and this random general man is stomping all over it, bringing his army with him like some kind of power statement and she is immediately ready to Throw Hands with this man on Ozpin’s behalf just out of PRINCIPLE. So when she goes up to visit him at one point and finds Ironwood already there, she ignores the conversation she interrupted by arriving, points at Ironwood and goes, “Is this guy bothering you, Headmaster? Should I through him out the window? Or down the elevator shaft?”

-Ironwood is stunned that a student just- SAYS THAT. Ozpin, who has already gotten to know Yang enough to know that her social default setting is “subtle as a brick that’s been dunked in gasoline and set on fire”, sighs, “I’m fine, Yang. This is General Ironwood from Atlas.”

-Yang clicks her tongue and cracks her knuckles, “I know who he is, he’s the guy who showed up and cluttered up your skies with those rattling junk heaps he calls an army. It’s why I asked if you wanted me to throw him.”

-Ironwood, truly aghast, “Excuse me?”

-(ngl I DO like Ironwood and feel like they did his character dirty in v7 and likely v8 but, especially in v2/v3 he does have a bit of a arrogance problem)

Lunweiss:

-Weiss probably confuses so many people at Beacon. She is a Schnee, so while people are expecting some measure of dignity they are also expecting snobbery or brattiness and instead she’s just- the sweetest, mildest person under her reserve?

-Jaune still has a huge crush on her, she firmly but gently informs him that she’s just not interested. When he is slow to take the hint she gets upset, but that just means she withdraws in on herself.

-Yang, activating her Big Sister instincts: Yo, Jaune. I like you, you’re a good friend. But if you don’t drop it then I’m going to drop kick you off the top of Beacon Tower.

-Jaune: o.o yes ma’am.

-Lunweiss has had ... something of a deprived childhood in both lives. I don’t mean physically, because of course as Oracle and then as Heiress she had the best clothes and finest foods, but just- in the ordinary Teenage Life Experience. Things like video games and board games, carnival food, shopping with friends- she doesn’t have any real experiences like that? So obviously, as soon as Team RWBY realizes this (aka the day they’re lounging around the dorm and Luna asks what “these” are, “these” being Yang’s and Ruby’s collection of video games), they set out to do All The Fun Things with Weiss. Even Blake gets in on it when she comes to the somewhat stunning realization that the life experience even she, the Faunus activist, took for granted, is stuff Weiss has only ever heard of distantly in books and film.

-Weiss, bemusedly attempting to play a video game while Yang and Ruby lean on either shoulder and coach her on the buttons: ...What is the purpose of this?

-Ruby: *initiates lore dump about the video game plot and characters and emotional story beats*

-Yang, yanking Ruby’s hood over her head so she sputters to a stop: To unwind and have fun with friends.

-Weiss: I thought that was what ‘sleepover night’ was for?

-Ruby: People can do more than one ‘fun’ activity, Weiss.

At one point Blake reluctantly takes Weiss book shopping because Ruby, as Team Leader, has organized an entire schedule of “who does what fun thing with Weiss” and this was hers: So this is my favorite book store, the fiction genres are that way, non-fiction is that way, and comics are over there.

Weiss: *looks incredibly, hopelessly lost* Ummmmm

Blake: ... let’s start simple. What kind of books did you read as a kid?

Weiss, a little helplessly: whatever the tutors my father hired deemed proper for my education at the time and whatever books I could sneak out of the library without being caught and told to put them back because they were either “too young” for me, “too old”, or “not proper for a young lady of my standing”. Grandfather had a lot of books that my father put in that latter category and eventually he just- locked the doors to the library entirely and bought a new copy of whatever my teachers or tutors said I needed.

Blake: *listens to this and slowly has an internal crisis that the ‘spoiled’ Schnee heiress has never been allowed to read her own choice of books aka Blake’s favorite childhood activity*

Blake, a little desperately: Are there any books you remember enjoying as a child? Even if they were assigned?

Weiss combs through her memories, decides that’s not productive, and goes all the way back to her Luna lifetime before tentatively admitting: I ... enjoyed reading mythology and other tales set in historical eras with little evidence of being actually true, but entertaining nonetheless, especially since they often had a moral component woven in.

Blake runs that through her internal Weiss Translator: Fairy tales. You like fairy tales. Okay, I can work with that.

[nikki-writes-stuff]

Beauty In the Blood - Part Two

Summary: One day your friend convinces you to join a dating website that matches people based on their search histories, and when you match with Loki Odinson, a handsome, intelligent coroner who’s a fan of your murder mysteries, you’re absolutely thrilled. But there’s something off about Loki, and as your relationship progresses, you discover that his dark side is even darker than you could ever have imagined…

Pairing: Serial Killer!Loki x Writer!Reader

Read part one here!

Read part three here! 

A/N: This story is based off of this post! I hope you guys enjoy; this is my first time writing Loki, and this will probably be the darkest thing I’ve ever written. Please let me know what you think as the story progresses!

Warning: This story contains graphic descriptions of death! This chapter also has mentions of smut in it, so read at your own risk! And, above all else, enjoy!

Your bottom lip was bright red from how ferociously you’d been chewing on it. The menu in your hands was crumpled from where you’d been gripping it, and your thigh was starting to feel sore from how fast your knee was bouncing under the table.

Another glance at your phone revealed the time to be 12:14, and your heart fluttered with a fresh wave of anxiety; you and Loki had agreed to meet at noon, and he didn’t seem like the type to be late. What if your first date with him hadn’t gone as well as you’d hoped? What if you were going to be sitting here, alone, for the next hour or so, waiting for a date who had no intention of showing up? What if-

Your musings were drowned out by a flood of relief when you saw the man in question walk through the bistro’s doors, and immediately you chided yourself on being so paranoid. His crystalline eyes scanned the small restaurant until they finally fell on you, and his face lit up when your gazes met.

Your heart squeezed as he started walking towards you, and you slowly scanned him up and down as he made his way to your table. Today, he was dressed in charcoal grey trousers with a light green shirt tucked into them, and though you knew it was silly, you couldn’t help but grin when you saw the briefcase he was holding. How professional.

“I am,” he huffed, sitting down across from you, “so sorry for being late. The police strolled in today ten minutes before my break with a body they’d dredged up from the Hudson this morning.”

“Just another day at the office, then?” you joked, and he chuckled under his breath.

“When you’re in my line of work, yes.”

“Well, it’s ok. You could’ve called to cancel if your work needed your attention-“

“No,” he shook his head resolutely. “I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind since the café. Nothing was going to make me miss this.”

Your cheeks felt even hotter, and you tried to hide your enormous smile behind your menu. A cold hand wrapped around one of your wrists, and you glanced up as Loki pulled your hand to rest in his on the tabletop. You shared a small, almost shy, smile with him before your waiter approached.

“Good afternoon,” he greeted the two of you. “My name is John; I’ll be taking care of you guys today. May I start out with your drink orders?”

After you’d placed your order of iced tea and Loki had requested a water with lemon, you sat your menu down and turned to him.

“So… How have the past three days been for you?” you asked, and Loki’s eyes flicked up from the menu as he answered.

“Busy. But not unmanageable; the police have been particularly obnoxious this week, but then again, New York’s finest have always been a pain in the arse.”

You chuckled and took a sip of your tea.

“Well… I’m sorry they’ve been giving you a hard time.”

“It’s fine; after all, that’s what they do best.” Having apparently decided on what he’d have for lunch, your date set his menu on top of yours and squeezed your hand. “How about you, though? Any new projects you’ve been working on?”

“Maybe,” you hummed. “I actually just sent the second draft of my latest novel to my publisher, so hopefully it’ll be on shelves in a few months’ time.”

Loki’s eyes lit up, and he leaned forward on his elbow.

“Oh? What is it about?”

You laughed at the eager look on his face and quirked an eyebrow.

“You don’t really want me to spoil it for you, do you?”

“Spoil it? No, but just a brief summary of the plot would be enough to satisfy your most dedicated reader. For now, at least.”

You pretended to think for it a moment, biting your lip and tilting your head to the side.

“Hm… I don’t know…”

Turning back toward Loki, you watched as he lifted the back of your hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to your knuckles as he winked at you.

“Please?” he asked, his voice just a note huskier than it had been a moment ago. “I can think of a few ways I could repay you…”

You swallowed, the cadence and timber of his voice going straight to your core, and you clenched your thighs at the implication of his words.

“Wh-what do you have in mind?” you stammered, and Loki gave you a knowing smirk.

“The only way to find out is if you tell me what I want to know,” he murmured.

Before you could say anything else, though, your waiter arrived with your drinks, and Loki’s eyes didn’t stray from you for even a moment, not even while he placed his order. You hoped the waiter hadn’t overheard your conversation as he walked up, and you stuttered your way through asking for the lunch special.

Once he was walking away, Loki’s smile stretched into a full-on, mischievous grin.

“I believe you had something you wanted to tell me, love?”

You blinked a few times and cleared your throat.

“Ah, yes. So,” you started, “the title I finally settled on is Cracked Glass, and it’s about two detectives who are partners – their names are Smithback and Charles. And the premise of the story is that one of them is a serial killer who keeps dropping bodies all over Chicago, but you don’t know which one is the killer until the very end. I’m actually pretty excited about it! My editor said that it’s her favorite of my works to date.”

Loki grinned, setting his chin in his palm while tracing your knuckles with the thumb of his other hand.

“That sounds incredibly intriguing, my dear,” he praised. “I’m guessing that there’s a plot twist of epic proportions at the end?”

“Well, I don’t like to brag, but…” You trailed off with a laugh, shrugging. “I just hope people like it. Especially my ‘most dedicated reader’.”

“I know that I’ll adore it, just as I have all your other works,” he assured you.

After that, the two of you made small talk until your food came. You found out that Loki’s favorite color was green, that he had a black cat named Lovecraft, and that his brother was planning a trip to New York to come visit him.

“We decided on May,” Loki informed you, “which gives me two months to prepare myself mentally for the onslaught that is Thor Odinson.”

“I’m sure he’s not that bad,” you chuckled, and Loki gave you a skeptical look.

“My brother once ate two entire rotisserie chickens in one setting while singing ‘Don’t Stop Believing’ drunkenly with his group of Neanderthalic friends,” he deadpanned. “We were twenty-eight at the time, and he’d consumed… I want to get the number right; I think it was twelve Jaeger Bombs.”

You almost choked on your tea from laughing so hard, and the smile he gave you was so genuine, so full of affection, that it made your heart swell almost painfully in your chest.

After finishing your meal, Loki insisted on paying the bill, and the two of you walked out of the bistro arm in arm. It was a beautiful, albeit cold, day in Manhattan. The sun was shining; the birds were singing; a saxophone player could be heard performing on a nearby street corner.

“It’s days like this that make me fall in love with New York,” you sighed, tilting your head back as the wind whipped through your hair.

Loki’s eyes followed the curve of your neck as you tilted your head towards the sky, and he licked his lips as he imagined wrapping his hand around it. He wouldn’t do any permanent damage, of course; he would sooner destroy a stained glass window than take the life of the woman he was already madly in love with. But his cock twitched at the thought of you walking around with bruises he’d painted across your body, starting with that elegant neck…

“Loki?”

He cleared his throat, snapping out of his reverie as you raised your eyebrow expectantly at him.

“I’m sorry, darling, did you say something?” he asked distractedly, and you chuckled before repeating yourself.

“I asked when you have to be back to work,” you said, and Loki glanced down at his watch.

“In about twenty minutes,” he sighed. “But the hospital is only a fifteen minute walk away.”

You hesitated, debating whether or not to ask the question that had popped into your head. You didn’t want to seem desperate, but at the same time, you didn’t want your date with Loki to end just yet.

“Would it be ok if I, um…walked with you to the hospital? If it’s ok,” you quickly added. “If you would rather have the time to yourself, then I can head home. It’s just-“

You were cut off by Loki’s lips as they pressed against yours, and you smiled as you sunk into the kiss, resting your hands on his chest as he nipped lightly at your bottom lip.

“Of course you can,” he whispered, running one of his hands through your hair. “I would leave work early, if I could, to spend the rest of the day with you.”

You grinned and stood up on your tiptoes to peck his lips again, warmth blooming within you.

“Okay…”

Reaching down, you laced your fingers through his as he started off in the direction of the hospital, and the walk was mostly silent as you took in the sights and sounds of the city around you. People were milling about busily, oblivious to you as you watched them. Loki, for his part, was too focused on how warm your hand felt in his and how good your hair smelled when the breeze carried its scent in his direction. This was only his second date with you, but you were already driving him mad; he’d never desired another person this way before. All of his previous attractions had been fleeting and superficial, but your mind drew him in like a moth to flame.

Before either of you knew it, the Bellevue Hospital Center was rising before you, a monolith of brick and glass, and you couldn’t help but feel intimidated by it. After all, it was one of the oldest hospitals in the city; Loki must have been fantastic at his job to be able to work in such a prestigious establishment.

“This is the office,” he joked, leading you in past the front doors.

You weren’t able to form a response as you stepped into the modern entry hall of the hospital. Curved walkways lay overhead, and the walls and ceiling were mostly made of glass. People were milling about everywhere, not sparing the two of you a single glance as they went about their business.

“Wow…”

Loki chuckled at your wonder, stopping next to a set of elevators as he rummaged through his pocket. You glanced down to see him pull out an ID card with his name, picture, and the words ‘Medical Examiner’ in bold font on it.

“I’ve never been to such a fancy looking hospital,” you admitted.

“After a while, it gets old,” he admitted, glancing around with an unimpressed look on his face. “It’s big and expensive, yes, but it nearly takes me twenty minutes just to walk from my office to the cafeteria.”

The two of you shared a laugh, oblivious to the detectives who had paused too look at you. Natasha turned to Steve, both of them shocked at seeing Loki actually laughing with someone. Not just someone – a pretty young woman who was currently holding his hand.

“I…don’t think I’ve ever seen him genuinely smile,” Rogers mused, and Natasha quirked an eyebrow, and unreadable expression on her face.

“Neither have I…”

They watched as you leaned up to press a kiss to Loki’s cheek, and something in Natasha stirred at the sight, something that hinted at feelings she’d never even considered having towards Dr. Odinson.

“I’ll text you tonight,” Loki said, oblivious to the officers staring at him from across the room. “Maybe we can do something this weekend? After all, I still need to repay you for letting me in on what your new masterpiece is about.”

Your cheeks heated up, and you playfully rolled your eyes.

“I definitely wouldn’t call it a masterpiece,” you insisted humbly.

“Mm, we’ll agree to disagree on that, love.”

You made to pull away, but Loki’s grip on you tightened, making you turn back to him curiously.

“Before you leave,” he murmured, “can I ask you another morbid question?”

“Of course,” you laughed. “I’m always up for one of those.”

Loki’s thumb traced your knuckles as he spoke to you in a hushed tone.

“Last time, you told me how you’d kill someone out of necessity,” he said, a twinkle of mischief alight in his eyes. “Tell me how you would kill someone who deserves to die. Maybe someone who’d done bad things to innocent people.”

You chuckled at the sincerity of the question; if it was anybody else, you’d be worried. But this was Loki; he had a morbid career just like you, and you knew better than to put any thought into his question.

“Is this going to become a game between us?” you giggled. “Exchanging ideas for murder?”

Loki snickered at the question.

“It can be, if you’d permit it.”

“Oh, I’m always down for some homicide.” You thought about it for a moment, biting your bottom lip in contemplation. “I guess… I would probably drown them. I’m not the strongest person in the world, but if you put someone in a bathtub and hold their legs up, it’s nearly impossible for them to right themselves. And, plus, it’s definitely not a painless way to die, so whatever horrible things they did will be paid for, I suppose.”

Loki nodded, filing away the information for later use.

“Elegant,” he praised, and you playfully bowed your head.

“I aim to please.”

After you said your goodbyes, the two of you parted ways, oblivious to the detectives still watching you. They were too far away to overhear your conversation, but both of them were intrigued to see Loki seemingly happy with someone.

As you walked out of the hospital, your eyes caught a flash of red hair, and you turned to see a drop-dead gorgeous redhead standing next to an equally attractive blonde man. Typically, you wouldn’t of given them a second glance, but… They were both watching you. Intently.

For a moment, you faltered in your step, the distinct feeling of being watched prickling at your scalp. But then the blonde man smiled at you and politely inclined his head, the way two strangers might do if they were both in line at a coffee shop.

You hesitantly returned his smile before walking out the doors, still feeling unsettled by the exchange. Because despite the friendly gesture of the man, the woman with him hadn’t even faltered in her stare. She’d just continued to watch you impassively, her arms crossed against her chest and her lips pressed firmly together.

The couple left your mind soon enough, though, and after sitting in a cab for twenty minutes, you were once again in your comfy townhome. You spent the rest of the afternoon in front of your computer, an empty word document open before you. It was true that you’d just finished up your latest work, but you knew you couldn’t get to comfortable. Bills would continue to come in whether or not you felt inspired, and though you had a comfortable cushion of money in the bank, you still didn’t want to get too comfortable.

And so, you’d decided to move on to the next project. But what would you write about?

Your mind, indubitably, strayed to Loki once more, turning over the last few minutes of conversation you’d had that day. He was so…elegant, with just a hint of a sinister edge that you were sure had come from his work. You were intrigued by his career, truth be told. How couldn’t you be? You’d written about death for years, now. But he’d lived it; he’d touched it.

And it was that thought that sent your fingers typing away at your keyboard.

It wasn’t that she’d chosen to live on the line between life and death; she liked to think that death had chosen her to be among its closest of companions, shaping her since her youth to be the walking Death Knoll that she’d become…

___________

Loki didn’t consider himself to be a full-on sociopath, but it was typically hard for him to empathize with others. Or, rather, it wasn’t that it was difficult for him; it was that most of the time he simply didn’t care to try to feel sympathy for other people.

But even he had some broken semblance of a moral compass, and no matter how dark his inner feelings grew, he knew that he would never be able to harm a child. Unfortunately, not everyone agreed with that particular sentiment, but at least he could do something about it.

He stayed late at the hospital two days after your lunch date, that familiar hunger within him having only grown since seeing you again. Usually, he could keep the beast under control, but something about you fanned the flames within him until he felt as if he’d burn alive if he didn’t do something, anything, to satiate them.

And so he found himself sneaking into the pediatric ward at 7 pm, just as the day-shift nurses were finishing up and the night-shift nurses were starting to take their place. A pair of deep purple gloves clung to his hands, and he was careful not to make too much noise as he snuck into one of the doctor’s offices. He went down the hallway, trying three before he found one left unlocked. HIPAA would have a field day if they only knew…

From there, he searched the room for a password to the computer, not surprised to see it written on a sticky note hidden beneath the keyboard. Whoever this doctor was, Loki made a mental note not to trust him with any of his medical records.

Taking a seat at the desk, he located the file of patients seen that day, scrolling through them for what he was looking for. A case of the flu, a sick stomach, an allergic reaction – no, no, no. He let out a huff of frustration as he pulled up patients seen the day before, then the day after that, looking for something he could use.

And that was when he saw poor little Annie Rineback.

He pulled up a picture of the five year old, frowning when he saw the deep purple bruise around her left eye. Loki skimmed through her vitals, scrolling down the page until he pulled up the doctor’s and nurse’s notes.

Patient refused to say anything in regard to how she’d received her injury. Pt’s mother insisted that Annie fell down while playing in their yard, but could not answer specific questions as to what specifically had caused pt’s injuries, the nurse had written.

Suspected case of abuse, the doctor had followed up in his own records. When asked, pt’s mother said that her husband had been at work during the time of the incident, though I have my own personal suspicions. Will call pt’s mother in a week to follow-up.

Loki made quick work of retrieving the little Annie’s address before closing out of the browser and locking the computer once more. After doing a quick scan of the room to make sure he’d left no trace, he made his way out, a sinister smirk on his face.

Time to get to work.

_________

It was Friday night when Loki got your call. His heart leapt with joy upon seeing your name flash across his screen, and he didn’t even hesitate as he answered.

“Hello, beautiful.”

Your own heart contorted upon hearing his voice; it had been Tuesday when you’d gone on your little lunch date, and the two of you had been texting each other at every opportunity ever since. But his voice just did things to you; you would always prefer it to texting.

“Hey, Loki. How’s it going?”

“Oh, same old, same old,” he replied, glancing around his basement. He’d recently dusted the space and sprayed it down with linen-scented air freshener, and he was quite happy with the result. The knives and saws gleamed against their white pegboard, and if he walked over to the examination table resting in its middle, he’d be able to see his reflection in its surface.

The only thing out of place was the large tub of water he’d dragged into the room. Well, that and the woman he had tied up in the corner. She was still passed out from the blow he’d landed to the back of her head, and he’d preemptively gagged her for whenever she woke up; his ears were still ringing from the way she’d screamed when he grabbed her in the alleyway near her apartment.

“How about you, darling?” he asked, leaning back against the metal sink behind him. “How’s the new book coming along?”

“It’s actually going really well; you’ve been quite the source of inspiration.”

Loki grinned widely, knowing that he must have looked like an infatuated schoolboy as his heart fluttered. But he didn’t care; the only person who could have seen the effect you had on him was currently passed out, and even if she hadn’t been, she would be soon.

“Really? I’m inspiring you? How so?”

“Well… The latest character in my book might be a suave, attractive medical examiner.”

His heart swelled at the idea of her basing one of her characters off of him, especially since he truly did love her work so much. He swallowed thickly before replying, internally berating himself for being such a sap.

“Oh? And do I have anything else in common with this fellow?”

“Not really. She also happens to be a woman. And she kills people, so… Yeah. I sure hope she doesn’t!”

Loki laughed along with you even as he cut his eyes towards his soon-to-be victim.

“Ehehe, yes. Well, I can’t wait to read all about her.”

His eyes widened when he saw Annie’s mom start to stir against her bonds, and he immediately straightened up.

“Hey, love?” he suddenly said. “Could I call you back in half an hour or so? I just got a text from Thor to call him, and I’d better make sure he isn’t setting something on fire.”

“Oh, sure thing,” you assured him, hoping that you hadn’t bothered him. “I’m sorry for calling at a bad time…”

“No, love, don’t apologize! I want nothing more than to hear your lovely voice,” Loki promised. “I’m just paranoid when it comes to Thor.”

You softened at that, letting the doubt you’d started to feel seep out of you.

“You’re a good brother, Loki,” you smiled. “I understand. Just give me a call back whenever you can.”

“I will,” he stated. “It shouldn’t take longer than thirty minutes.” He watched as the woman he had tied up started to blink her eyes open, and he knew that he needed to go before she started with her incessant screaming again.

“I’ll call you right back,” he said once more.

“Okey, doke. Bye, Loki!”

“Goodbye, love.”

Not a moment after he’d hung up, the woman made a small noise of panic, which amplified into a full-on wail once she saw the wall of torture devices Loki had constructed. With a roll of his eyes, and shoved his phone back into his pocket and marched over to her, kneeling down to her level to grip her throat.

“If you don’t shut up,” he growled, “I will cut off your fingers and toes one by one until you have nothing but bloody stumps left. Do you want that?”

The woman’s mascara was tracking down her cheeks, staining the rope that was currently gagging her, and after a few sniveling gasps she nodded her head.

“Good. Now,” Loki continued, “let me explain your current situation. You are in my basement right now under layers of concrete and insulation. This room is locked and sound-proof, and I live alone. No one will come to help you, and no one knows where you are.

“Now, I have a few questions to ask you, so I’m going to take your gag off. But,” he added when he saw the woman perk up, “if you start with that screaming again, I will slit your throat and call it a day. And neither of us want that, now do we?”

Once again, the woman shook her head, and Loki gave her a tight smile.

“Very good.”

He reached out and gripped the rope, tugging it out from between her teeth until it rested loosely around her neck. To her credit, she didn’t scream as he’d expected her to, nor did she persist in struggling against her bonds as she had been a moment before.

“Hm. Very good,” Loki praised as he stood up.

“Are you going to kill me?” the woman asked, looking up at him with pleading, tearful eyes. “Please,” she continued after a moment of silence, “please, I have a family.”

At that, Loki threw his head back and laughed.

“Oh, Mrs. Rineback, I’m aware,” he chuckled. “In fact, that’s exactly what I had questions about.

“See, I don’t have children,” he mused, starting to pace in front of her. “Nor do I think I ever will. But I do understand the general concept. You’re supposed to love your children unconditionally and care for them, nurture them, blah blah blah… But you, Mrs. Rineback, you do none of those things, now do you?”

The woman’s face grew guarded upon hearing that, and she stiffened.

“I… I don’t know what you-“

“Oh, don’t insult me,” Loki scoffed. “I already know all of your dirty little secrets. Poor little Annie… Originally, I’d started researching her, believing that maybe her father really hadn’t been at work the day she was brought into the hospital with a black eye and bruised rib. That was what the doctor assumed to be the case, at least.

“But all too often, the mother is overlooked as the possible abuser, is she not?”

Loki stood still in front of her, watching as horror started to fill her gaze. He took a moment to enjoy this intoxicating moment of complete power; he could get off on this alone.

“Yes, Mrs. Rineback,” he cooed. “I know. I know everything. I know of what you’ve put Annie through, and I know what you put little Micah through before his…untimely end.”

A whimper escaped her upon hearing her son’s name, and she looked away, no doubt feeling hot shame wash over her.

“Micha…fell down a flight of stairs,” she whispered. “It was an accident!”

“Oh, I have no doubt that he fell down some stairs. But I very much doubt that it was an accident.”

Silence hung heavily between them, until the click of his shoes accompanied his steps as he approached her.

“Tell me – how do you sleep at night with the murder of your seven year old son looming over your head? Evidently, not too restlessly, if you still continue to abuse your remaining child-“

“Stop!” she suddenly shouted, bowing her head. “Stop, please; I’m a good mother. I… I love my child. I loved… I loved Micah.”

“But that doesn’t stop you from drinking, now does it?” he snarled. “I only watched you for a day before knowing I wouldn’t be able to stomach another. Do you always start drinking with your breakfast?”

She didn’t look up at him, and he watched with a sneer as her shoulders shook with her sobs. He knelt down beside her, gripping her throat once more and forcing her to meet his eyes.

“You,” he whispered, “repulse me.”

With that, he hauled her to her feet, ignoring the way she writhed and twisted in his grip. Her attempts at fleeing were borderline laughable as he neared the tub, and with a kick to the back of her knee she was kneeling before it.

“The world will not miss you,” he assured her, twisting a hand in her hair and yanking until she was halfway in the water. “Nor will your family.”

And with that, he shoved her in, dropping to his knees and flipping her onto her back. Her restrained arms twisted, and most of her weight was placed upon her tied hands where they rested against her lower back as Loki grabbed her ankles.

From there, it was only a matter of time. He stood up, keeping her legs in the air, as she floundered under the water. It was delightful to watch her at this angle, and Loki once again said a silent thank you for the idea. He could clearly see her face as she fought towards the surface, resembling a fish flopping around on a pier as she struggled.

It didn’t take long before her harried motions started to slow down, though, and Loki almost was disappointed as the fight left her. He watched her chest expand as she took in a large lungful of water, and the sputters she made were music to his ears. And disappointment he had faded when she went completely motionless, and in her last moments, she opened her eyes and looked up at him through the haze. Even through the ripples in the water, he could distinguish the moment that she knew she was about to die, and the fear within her gaze was euphoric to him. He wondered, for a moment, if she was afraid of waking up in hell, even though he’d long since dismissed the idea of such fanciful, religious notions.

When he was finally sure that she was dead, he let go of his grip on her legs and took a step back, glancing down in disgust at the water that had gotten on his clothes. But, then again, he typically left his basement covered in blood, so this was amongst the cleanest ways he’d killed one of his victims.

Ten minutes later, he was in his bed, stroke Lovecraft as she laid against his side. He’d cleaned up and put on some sweatpants before settling in to call you, and butterflies flapped around his chest just at the sight of your name in his phone.

“This is ridiculous,” he huffed, sending a bemused glance towards his cat. “I’m a thirty-six year old man – I’m a fucking serial killer – and this woman already has me wrapped around her finger.”

His cat only blinked slowly up at him, not caring in the slightest about his internal distress, and with a small smile, he pressed the call button.

Meanwhile, you were in bed yourself, reading a book you’d picked up from the store a few days ago, when you heard your ringtone. With a squeal, you all but threw your book down and accepted the call, a huge smile on your face as you answered.

“Hello, again.”

“Hello, darling. Sorry again about earlier.”

“No, it’s fine! I totally get it. How is everything with Thor?”

“Thor is fine,” he smiled. “He needed my help installing photoshop on his computer. Why he needs photoshop, I’ll never know, but I walked him through it and now I only have a mild headache from the endeavor.”

“I really need to meet your brother in person. Just wait until I tell him all the things you’ve been saying.”

“I assure you, it’s nothing I haven’t told him directly in person. But he’s gotten me back a few times, despite his incompetence. One time, he tried to sell me on Craigslist.”

“Oh, no! That’s…that’s actually hilarious.”

“Mm, well. The concerning thing was that I had a few interested parties.”

You both laughed at that, and after a while you were both left in an almost awkward silence.

“So…” you finally began nervously. “I was wondering if you’re free tomorrow.”

“As a matter of fact, I am,” Loki said. “Did you have anything in mind for us?”

“Well… I was wondering if you would like to come over and be seduced by my cooking skills.”

“I think it’s fair to say that you’ve already seduced me,” he chuckled. “But I would love to. Can I bring anything?”

“Just yourself! …And actually, a bottle of wine would be awesome.”

“Then I’ll pick one up on the way.”

You grinned, sitting up in bed.

“Well, then. I’ll plan on seeing you tomorrow, Dr. Odinson.”

There was something about the way you said his title that made Loki’s cock twitch in his pants, and he absentmindedly reached down to give it a squeeze.

“I’ll look forward to it,” he breathed.

As soon as the two of you said your goodbyes, Loki practically leapt out of bed and hopped into the shower, both to wash the scent of Mrs. Rineback’s cheap perfume off of him and to quell his sudden lust for you. He couldn’t help but wonder what exactly you had in mind for tomorrow; he wasn’t sure how long he would be able to wait until he all but threw you onto the nearest horizontal surface and fucked your brains out. The way you made him feel was unlike anything he’d ever experienced, and he could only hope that you felt the same way.

Meanwhile, miles away, you were looking at the new set of lingerie you’d bought that evening as it lay atop your dresser. You closed your eyes and let yourself fall back against your pillows, fantasizing about the look on Loki’s face when he saw you in the dark green bra and panties you’d picked out just for him. A hand slipped into your pajama shorts at the thought, and unbeknownst to either of you, you both came at almost the same time that evening, your minds focused on the exact same thing.

Tomorrow night.

[scullydubois]

Only the Light Ch. 4

Description: Missy and Scully’s girls night gets interrupted by an uninvited guest.

Read on Ao3 here. Tagging @today-in-fic​.

A long--and fun!--part. Hope you enjoy!

-------------

The elevator doors part, releasing Scully into the tranquility of her hallway. She steps out, glad to be away from the bustling FBI building and the noisy street and the elevator so squeaky that she’s pretty sure she’ll find herself trapped in it one of these days. That’s a problem for another time. For now, all Scully wants is to take off her shoes, pantyhose, and bra. The simple pleasures.

She sticks her key in the doorknob and turns. The deadbolt clicks. She’s locked it. She sighs. Missy left the door unlocked again. She twists the key the other way and it opens. She enters and drops the key, her purse, and her badge on the side table.

“It’s me!” Her voice echoes through the place.

“I’m in here,” Missy responds from the kitchen.

Scully enters the kitchen. Her sister’s still in the hostess uniform for the restaurant job she just got. She flips mindlessly through an issue of Better Homes and Garden.

“You left the door unlocked again.”

Missy flips a page of the magazine so hard she almost tears it. “Oops.” 

Scully sighs and sits down at the table. Her sister has always been the dramatic type.

“How was training?” she offers.

Missy sets down the magazine as if she’s thankful to have an out.

“Pretty standard for an upscale eatery that calls itself casual but charges twenty dollars for a bowl of soup. Turns out, the East Coast isn’t actually that different from the West Coast.”

“Wow. Who’ve thought?”

Missy chuckles. “I know, right?”

“Speaking of the West Coast…”

Melissa groans. Her sister’s been trying to get information about her whereabouts ever since she moved in. She’s under the impression that everyone’s life is as interesting as working for the FBI, and while Melissa tries to make hers so, there’s just not much to report. Except for the one thing she’s specifically avoiding. She will tell Dana at some point, she has to, but for now she doesn’t want to add to the cacophony of things her sister has to worry about. Besides, it’s not anything bad. If anything, Melissa is looking forward to telling her. It’s their mother she’s worried about.

“I told you, it’s nothing juicy. I was out there doing odd jobs. Waitressing, mostly. There was a stint as a gas station attendant.”

Scully laughs. “A gas station attendant?”

“In Oregon you’re not allowed to pump your own gas.”

Scully raises her eyebrows. “Seems like it wouldn’t be a very safe job for a young woman late at night.”

Missy shrugs, then, with the dedication of an Oscar-winning actress, says, “It was a male dominated profession, but I made do.”

Scully smiles. She knows the feeling. She steps out of her heels and carries them into her bedroom. She shimmies off her pantyhose, then sits on the edge of the bed and presses her thumbs deep into the arches of her feet. Heaven. After a moment of bliss, she takes a pair of pink fuzzy socks from her drawer and slips them on.

She returns to the kitchen--“Have you had dinner?” 

“Just a bowl of salad,” Missy replies. 

“Am I to assume by your pitiful tone that you’re up for something else?”

“If you order something and tell me I can have it, who am I to say no?”

Scully chuckles. “How courteous.”  She pulls out a drawer full of take-out menus in various conditions. Some of them Scully has had since her Academy days. 

“The ones on the top are Mexican, the middle is Chinese and Japanese, after that is Italian, and the bottom ones are Indian.” 

Few things that Dana has said have surprised Melissa as little as this organizational structure. What she doesn’t expect is the sheer volume of her sister’s collection. Her eyes widen as she approaches the drawer. There’s literally hundreds of menus stacked in there. 

“Um, may I ask for the chef’s recommendations?”

Scully pulls a couple menus out like it’s nothing.

“Well, if you’re in the mood for curry, this one is great,” she slides a colorful menu toward Missy. “But this is the best Chinese takeout in the city.” She sets down a menu with the Chinese symbols for good fortune on it (yes, Missy knows some Chinese). Missy figures they could both use some good fortune, so she picks up that one.

“Do they have hot & sour soup?”

“I’m sure. I always have the fried rice and orange chicken.”

“Oh, that sounds good too. Can we do a bowl of hot & sour soup and two portions of rice with orange chicken?”

Scully picks up the phone. “Of course.” She dials the number from the menu. As it’s ringing, Missy whispers, “And fortune cookies?”

“They always give you some. They’re not very goo-” The restaurant picks up. A fast-talking voice buzzes in Scully’s ear. 

Melissa laughs at this slip. As her sister’s about to recite the order, she adds, “I don’t care, I just want to read them.”

Scully tells the woman the order, confirms that it’ll come with fortune cookies, and gives them her address and unit number. She thanks the woman, hangs up the phone.

“It’ll be 25 minutes,” she tells Missy.

“Perfect.” Scully can tell from the sound of her voice that she’s up to no good. 

“Perfect for whatever villainous plot you’re about to drag me into, you mean?”

“Perfect for us to get ready for the girl’s night we’re about to have,” she replies matter-of-factly. 

Scully opens her mouth to protest, but Missy beats her to it. “I know, I know. It’s Thursday, you have work tomorrow, you’re tired...but it doesn’t have to be anything grand. Just a little self-care and relaxation, okay?”

Scully frowns in her funny, ‘I’m not actually upset, I just can’t think of a good comeback’ way. 

“And besides,” Missy continues, “you don’t wanna be a party pooper, do you?”

Scully frowns for real this time. This unearths some childhood insecurities she had forgotten she had. It conjures up the image of teenaged Missy with a pack of cigarettes--their mother’s--begging her to sneak out the window and smoke them together, that it would be fun. How she said no until she couldn’t bear her sister’s juvenile belittling anymore. It figures that she has to be guilted into having fun. She bets that her parents would never have imagined that their little girl smoked a cigarette younger than their free-spirited daughter ever did.

“Come onnnnn,” Missy drawls. “We can get in our pajamas and slippers, and I have some avocado face masks we can do. Plus, I brought my box set of Golden Girls.”

Scully can’t help but smile at that. On nights before big exams in medical school, she would put Blanche, Dorothy, Sophia, and Rose on in the background to keep her company as she studied. She called it her golden good luck charm because she passed every test she did this with. 

“Fine.”

Fine. The Dana stamp of approval! Missy leaps into action. “Go get dressed, and I’ll grab the face masks.”

Scully does as she’s told (per usual). She chooses her silkiest pajama set because this feels like an occasion to go all out. A few minutes later, she’s sitting on the couch letting Missy spread the avocado paste across her face. 

“Is this just mashed up avocado?” she asks. “Could we eat this?”

“I think there’s honey in it too.” Missy scraps a dot off where it spilled over to Scully’s headband and licks it. “Not bad...Are you that hungry?”

Scully chuckles. “No, I was just wondering.”

“Well, if it does to your insides what it does to your face, then watch out.”

“Yeah, I think I’ll pass on that,” Scully remarks.

“Good choice.” Missy finishes Scully’s face and turns so that Scully can do hers. Scully dips a finger into the green paste. It’s cold and sticky, not exactly a desirable combination.

“Do you do this a lot?” she asks Missy.

“Usually once a week, if I think of it.”

Scully wouldn’t have the time to think of it, let alone do it. “That’s nice,” she says wistfully, realizing there’s not much farther she can take the subject.

“I brew some tea, light some incense, and boom. My own personal nirvana.”

“Mmm.” Scully’s feeling increasingly isolated by this conversation. Missy reads her mind in the typical way.

“You don’t take much time for yourself.” It’s a statement, not a question.

 “I just don’t have much time in general,” Scully replies on the defensive.

“And you certainly don’t allot what you do have to yourself.”

Scully lifts her finger off Missy’s face, dips it back into the paste. “I take care of myself,” she says.

“But you don’t spoil yourself.”

“Who am I to be spoiled?” And there is the fundamental ideological difference between Missy and her sister. Missy, who wants life to be overflowing with joy, bereft of nothing. Dana, who believes that nothingness gives her strength, and strength gives her character.

The delivery man's knock on the door eclipses any response Melissa was planning to make. Probably for the best. This is the rift the sisters cannot manage to pave over.

Missy grabs the food and pays the man. She knows her sister would be embarrassed to be seen with the mask on, and she’ll do anything to make Dana’s life that much easier. 

They dig in, eating straight from the cartons. Missy insists on using chopsticks, which works great for the chicken but not so hot on the rice. She doesn’t bother trying them with the soup. Scully doesn’t have the patience for any of it, so she sticks to the plastic fork that came with it all.

Between bites of chicken, Scully reaches for a fortune cookie. Missy swipes it out of her hand, sending it catapulting toward the floor. 

“What was that for?” Scully exclaims.

“Haven’t you ever heard that it’s bad luck to read your fortune before you finish the meal?”

“No?”

“Well, that explains a lot then.”

Scully smirks, sets the cookie back on the table with the others. “I think you just wanted that one.”

Missy feigns innocence, then shrugs. “I have a good feeling about it.”

-----------

A few minutes later, the girls have settled on the couch, empty cartons of take-out strewn on the table in front of them. The four fortune cookies they received are all wrapped up. They’re too full to bother with them just yet. They chirp bits of commentary about the Golden Girls episode they’re watching back and forth between each other.

“I see some Blanche in you,” Scully comments, “but mostly I think you’re Rose.”

“She’s my favorite, so I will gladly accept that,” Missy replies.

The episode’s laugh track nearly conceals a slight rap on the door. 

Scully looks toward the door. “Did you hear something?” 

Missy clicks the volume down on the remote. “Maybe. I’ll check.”

She heads for the door,  peeks through the peephole, then unfastens the chain and lets the door swing on its hinges.

“It’s Mulder!” she exclaims after Mulder has already stepped through the doorway.

It is, in fact, Mulder. Still in his work clothes and holding a manila folder. His eyes widen in surprise.

“Oh. Melissa.”

She smiles slyly. Evidently, he did not expect her nor her face mask.

“Hello, Fox.”

Scully pulls her feet up onto the couch and crosses her arms protectively over her chest, hoping that somehow, maybe, he won’t notice her here in her own apartment. Her first thought is that she’s not wearing a bra. She realizes that this is an unproductive thought to have because it’s not like she’s naked or anything, she’s wearing a pajama top, and he’s seen her in a pajama top before. Hell, he saw her in her underwear on their first case! Not to mention that he’d seen her on her deathbed, and is there anything more naked than that? Still, she hadn’t expected him, and she feels caught off-guard by his sudden appearance. 

For what it’s worth, Mulder is caught off guard by her too. She looks...soft. Relaxed. He very rarely gets to see her in casual circumstances. Even in the assortment of motel rooms he’d sat with her in, she was always keyed up, her mind trying to piece together the puzzle of whatever case they were on. This was new territory. 

“Hi, Scully,” he croaks. 

“Hello,” she replies sheepishly. 

Mulder can’t take his eyes off her. He’s endeared by the green face mask and all of its components. The headband pulling tendrils of her hair tenderly away from her face, the stray locks that have slipped out and stuck to the paste, the extra youthful look it gives her...he never realized how much he missed out on. How much she keeps from him. Suddenly, he’s certain: the woman sitting on the couch isn't Scully. It’s Dana, and there's nothing he wants more than to get to know her better. 

Remembering what he’s there for, he holds the folder out to her. 

“Uh, I just came to give you these toxicology results. I thought you might want to review them before tomorrow.”

She takes the folder while keeping one arm stationed in front of her chest.

“Thank you. I will.”

She plops the folder with the mess on the coffee table and returns both arms to her chest.

Feeling like the intruder that--in Scully’s mind--he is, Mulder glances at the TV.

“Golden Girls. That’s serious business, I’ll get out of your hair.”

Melissa mutes the TV. “Actually, we were just discussing what Golden Girl we think we are. We agreed that I’m Rose, but we’re still trying to figure out Dana.”

This is a challenge Mulder is more than happy to accept. 

“Dana…” He looks at her with a lop-sided smile, letting the word roll off his tongue in a teasing way.

Scully blushes. Oh how she wishes her body would not so easily give her away. Figuring there’s nothing to lose, she takes this opportunity to catalogue the colors in his eyes. She has an ongoing debate with herself about what color they actually are. She’s seen green, brown, and blue with such certainty that she’s pretty sure he has the ability to change them like a mood ring. She’s not sure she would want to know what each color means. 

She decides that they’re looking quite green tonight (is that good?) and breaks eye contact with him out of necessity. Call it self-preservation.

This silent exchange pleases Melissa, maybe even more than it does Mulder. She loves being right as much as her sister does. 

“I was thinking she’s a Dorothy,” Melissa pipes up. “What do you think, Fox?”

He flinches. Melissa scoffs. “Sorry--Mulder. What is it with FBI agents and insisting on being called their last name? That’s got to be some sort of psychological phenomenon.” Then, because she can’t resist--“You should open a x-file on that.”

Scully chuckles. Mulder just purses his lips.

“Ha ha. Very funny.”

“I know,” Melissa claps back in jest. “That’s why I said it.”

Scully looks toward the window. She could have sworn she saw a flash of lightning outside, but no thunder follows it. When she looks back, Mulder’s eyes are trained on her once again. Yep, still green. He pushes some of the cartons aside and perches on the table in front of her and Missy. If Scully put her legs down, their knees would touch. 

“Dorothy is the obvious choice,” he says. “But that’s too easy. Scully’s not easy.”

Scully flicks her gaze toward Missy, who bites her lip to keep the sarcastic comment in her mind from slipping out. 

“So what is she then?” Melissa challenges.

Scully’s eyes meet Mulder’s. She’s not sure what he’ll say, and she’s not too worried about it. What matters is that she’s looking at him, he’s looking at her, and her skin feels like it’s been warmed by the sun. This is not a normal reaction to another human being looking at you, she knows. She made a pact with herself early on not to think too hard about it. It’s moments like this that make her question the point of that.

She feels sated...she so rarely feels that way. Realizing that there is nothing worth keeping from him, not right now, Scully lowers her hands into her lap.

Feeling like he’s done something right, Mulder smiles. He answers Missy’s question without taking his eyes off his partner. Scully’s burning up.

“Well, she’s smart but not pretentious, curious but not unconventional, reliable but not naive, honest but not a curmudgeon, and diligent but not intense...so I don’t know.”

He looks to Melissa. 

“Are any of the Golden Girls as interesting as that?”

Scully’s breath catches. This is quite possibly the most romantic moment of her whole life...What does that say about her? She lowers her feet so that her silk pajama bottoms nuzzle his coarse slacks. Call it a gesture of goodwill. Meanwhile, Mulder wonders if Scully notices that their kneecaps are touching.

Missy smiles. She’s engineered a moment, and what a wonderful one. 

“I suppose not,” she replies lightly. “Dana’s one of a kind.”

“That’s for sure.” Mulder clasps Scully’s hand, and for a second, she thinks he’s going to kiss it. His fingers slip away and grab a fortune cookie off the table instead.

He rips the plastic off it, then snaps it in half. He sets a half in Scully’s open palm as if on instinct. She didn’t even realize she had turned her hand up. Her fingers close over the cookie. She couldn’t possibly eat it now that he’d touched it. Or was that all the more reason to eat it?

Mulder pulls the paper from his half, pops the cookie in his mouth, and crunches as he reads the fortune. “Depart not from the path which fate has you assigned...huh.” He crumbles up the plastic and sticks it in his pocket. “Never seen that one before.”

“Me neither,” Scully remarks dreamily. Melissa looks on, feeling like she’s watching a movie play out in front of her.

Mulder rubs his hands against his pant legs to extend the moment, then stands up, bumping Scully as he does.

“Sorry,” he says, resting a hand on her shoulder. She shakes her head to indicate it’s nothing. “You’re fine.”

As she looks up at him, Mulder finds himself struck with the desire to swim in those blue eyes of hers. He knows that his feeling for Scully--whatever it is--is different from the girls on his magazines and tapes. His thoughts about Scully are somehow both innocent and ridiculously gratifying. His thoughts about the other girls are neither.

“Well, I’ll get going,” he says, stepping around Scully and Melissa’s feet. He turns back to meet Scully’s glance one last time--

“See you tomorrow morning.” He winks.

Scully is so charmed by this all she can muster up is, “Uh-huh.”

Missy bursts into laughter as soon as Mulder closes the door. Scully lets her. She looks down at her palm and realizes that she has put so much pressure on the fortune cookie that it crumbled. She won’t read into this either.

[allthefilmsiveseenforfree]

What Lies Beneath

So my wife is incredibly supportive of my movie-watching goals. She helped me set up my blog and my Patreon, she was my very first patron, and she watches at least half the movies with me. As my patron, she has the right to request one movie per calendar year for me to review just for her. But sometimes she tries to skirt the rules by insinuating, nay, cajoling nonstop in her goal for me to watch a movie she wants me to see without it counting as her “official” selection. And because I love her, I (sometimes) allow it. Such was the case with What Lies Beneath, a twisty psychological haunted house thriller that stars two middle-aged, serious actors (Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer), and that I shockingly wasn’t lining up at the megaplex for when I was 13. What did my preteen self miss? Well...

A fucking GREAT movie is what I missed. I won’t sugarcoat it - this was a huge surprise in the best way. I won’t spoil the ending at all, because this is one film I think you really need to watch unfold for the first time without knowing exactly what’s going on. Basically, Claire and Norman Spencer are new empty-nesters, and in their gorgeous Vermont home all to themselves, strange things start happening. Is it something to do with the mysterious new neighbors? Or maybe some past traumas that are dug up over the course of the movie? Could their house be actually haunted by some malevolent spirit? All of these are distinct, and delicious, possibilities, and it’s a hell of a lot of fun figuring out what exactly is going on.

Some thoughts:

A VERY GOOD DOG at the very beginning! I was so concerned for the dog at a few points in the film, but the dog (Cooper) is absolutely fine and remains happy and carefree all the way to the end of the film. 

I have always had a thing for Harrison Ford, and that is not diminishing at all as I watch him shirtless in bed while writing a paper about science. Unf.

Very into the way this exposition is handled - Claire (Pfeiffer) missing her daughter and finding the Julliard tank top in her dresser, then looking through photo albums where we see the daughter wearing it, then see Claire studying at Julliard, then see HER wearing the tank top, plus some articles about Norman’s father dying and photos from a car accident in which I think her first husband died. It’s all tiny pieces of exposition, just little bits of information that you, the viewer, have to put together and remember, and I love that. 

Don’t love Norman (Ford) gaslighting her about what to do about the neighbors. If you mind your own business and never reach out when people sound like they need help, that’s how people get hurt. Makes me think he has something to hide or maybe some kind of connection to the neighbors?

Loving the Rear Window vibes of spying on the neighbors, thinking you’ve witnessed a murder, complete with binocular surveillance.

There’s a lot of wind in this movie. Wind is basically like another character.

The layering of dialogue - Norman and his friend are talking about a colleague who got fired for stalking an intern, and Claire and her old friend are catching up. The two conversations are overlapping, and I think they’re both important but we’re so wrapped up in Claire and her friend that that stalking conversation gets buried. This is really well-thought-out character development and building of backstory and motivation. I haven’t watched a movie this skillfully thought out in quite awhile.

I hate the way Norman diminishes her. Like he’s charming and he’s Harrison Ford, but he kind of implies that she’s hysterical or silly for the things she’s been experiencing, and laughs at her expense. 

She didn’t say goodbye after playing with the Ouija board. ROOKIE MISTAKE, everything that happens afterward is clearly a result of poor Ouija etiquette. 

Oh interesting, so she was in a terrible car accident a year ago, which is part of why everyone is worried about her mental state and fragility. We don’t discover this until HALFWAY THROUGH THE FILM. This is storytelling like prestige television does it, and it’s so unusual to see in a film now that it keeps bowling me over. 

Their water bill is gonna be sky high after this. These completely full tubs? The rates are astronomical.

Oh no things have escalated so quickly - I feel like I’m trying to outsmart the twist at every turn and I can’t quite grasp it, which is good because I actually think this is an incredibly plotted movie that’s so purposefully and carefully crafted. I can’t help but feel that we are missing so much now, because we just don’t get mid-level budget domestic dramas with A-list actors like this anymore. I think their era might have completely passed, and that’s a damn shame because the nuance and care here makes this such a delightful and surprising ride to take.

A huge part of that is Ford and Pfeiffer just absolutely nailing how they play every single scene. Their chemistry is great, and watching them play off each other, you can sense all the layers of their relationship, all the past traumas and the lies and the reconciliations. 

He says “I know you’re going through something I don’t understand and I’ve tried to be there for you” but like...have you, Norman? You’re always working, you shut her down every time she wants to talk. 

The brilliance here is that you don’t know if something supernatural is actually going on or if there’s a rational explanation, and I’m so here for the ambiguity. We simply don’t get enough ambiguity (that’s purposeful) in mainstream Hollywood films anymore. It’s all in the indies, which are great, don’t get me wrong! But I want more audiences to see how it could be done.  

I know I just keep going on about it but every new scene reveals a detail that feeds into the overarching mystery in such a natural way. For example, this NICE callback to the key, which I had totally forgotten about. This honestly is a fantastic slow burn of a film, really well done. 

I’m so enjoying Harrison Ford using his charm and his looks and his general Harrison Ford-ness to play a not very nice guy. He’s not a lovable rogue like Han Solo or a stubborn adventurer with a heart of gold like Indiana Jones, he’s just a guy who thinks he deserves to have what he wants at any cost. He’s worked hard, he’s a “good guy” and he thinks that he’s entitled to have things go his way just because. 

Holy shit the symmetry with the first scene of the film to the big climax - that’s just some damn good writing, that is. 

I’m so pleased that there’s no music at all during this final sequence - the score had been a bit overbearing at times, but this eerie silence with just the water running is, frankly, terrifying.

One slight critique - the movie has almost as many endings as Lord of the Rings. You think it’s done, and then there’s another whole section that you think is gonna be the last, and then everything’s underwater again and it’s STILL NOT DONE. But in a good way, I didn’t get nearly as pissed as I do at the end of LOTR. 

Holy fucking shit, Clark Gregg wrote this?????? Agent Coulson Clark Gregg?? This is my absolute favorite bit of movie trivia I’ve learned all year. 

Did I Cry? No. 

I am never going to stop talking about this movie. Wife was right, and I will say it loudly and publicly - I am so glad she cajoled me into watching this film. If you haven’t seen it, watch it immediately. It’s smart, it’s well-paced, it keeps you guessing, and it boils over into an absolutely bonkers climax in the best way. I will be thinking about this for aaaages and missing the way movies outside of the “Disney/Pixar/Marvel vs. teeny independent Spirit Award winner” machine used to get made. 

If you liked this review, please consider reblogging or subscribing to my Patreon! For as low as $1, you can access bonus content and movie reviews, or even request that I review any movie of your choice.

[buckevantommy]

'(Un)Happiest Season' review

Simply put, it wasn't enjoyable as a romance or a comedy or a Christmas flick. It failed on many fronts, but this reviewer from Salon.com puts the thing into words for Happiest Season's main failings: 

What's bad: There were two main criticisms of "Happiest Season." The first being: Can't LGBTQ audiences have a holiday movie where the main plot isn't about mining the anxiety and trauma associated with coming out, being closeted and casual homophobia? Then there's the fact that Harper really is just kind of the worst. After pushing Abby back in the closet, Harper ditches her in a town where she doesn't know anyone to go drink with her ex-boyfriend until two in the morning, then proceeds to call Abby "suffocating" when called on it. It's a pattern of s**ty behavior that is pervasive and present throughout the movie, so her redemption arc doesn't feel super genuine. 

Why can't we have main queer characters in Christmas movies without their presence being all about their queerness? We want fluffy festiveness, dammit! They could've made Harper less selfish and more attentive while still playing into the *I'm not out yet Because Reasons so we need to hide our gay relationship* trope, but they didn't. Who knows why, but what a waste. 🎄👩‍❤️‍👩☃️

^ Look at that trailer and tell me you don't expect Misunderstandings with fun and tropey antics + Domestic Christmas Shenanigans + Comfort for Hurt! You will be sorely disappointed. 😞 

NOTE: The flick does have a few good moments. And it's probably worth the watch just to see what's missing/mishandled when it comes to queer characters and queer romances in mainstream movies. 

But it's not really fun or funny or heart-warming - where are the snowball fights? Insightful conversations? Christmas elements like eggnog/spiced wine, candycanes, mistletoe? Where are the many colourful side characters and the hungover brunches? We get one scene of ice-skating for a few minutes and it's wasted on sibling rivalry bs rather than, say.. Abby and Harper skating together but not being aloud to touch—omg the tension!! 😍 

There's just not enough comfort for the hurt Abby (Kstew) goes through; the film wholly lacks those warm-n-fuzzy Christmas vibes; there's just way more wrong with it than is right with it - which sucks, because this had the potential to be such a great movie if only Harper was written as less ignorant/selfish and we'd gotten more enjoyable family interactions and more festive fun - like a celebration in town. Instead we get a few limited shots of the adorable town, a crappy bar, and an OTT fancy Christmas party for performative rich white folk on a career path for power and "perfection" (ie. wholesome family values). 

The story they went with was definitely better suited for a dramatic film, so in a romcom setting it really didn't work. Plus the side-characters were flat; we needed more depth from the supporting characters, more meaningful interactions. 

^ Look at those intro credits!! Look at all the domestic happy moments and tell me you don't want to see a movie filled with such fluffy festive goodness!! Well, if you don't want to see such moments, don't worry because you won't. I naturally thought we were going to get this kind of romantic-and-non-romantic happiness dispersed throughout the entire film, but no. Not a one. There's 5 minutes of Happy Couple at the start, and that's it 📸☹️ (unless you count a photo collage of the happy ending and year that follows stuffed into the end credits). 

BTW: That intro song is the most Christmasy song in the whole movie. The soundtrack features modern pop songs which 1) don't help set the festive vibe and 2) are really fucking annoying; the song choices are grating, not pleasant, not enjoyable, and they overpower the scenes with a whole lotta noise. I really wish we'd gotten more tunes like the one above. 🎶 

About the image below—Abby is actually miserable the entire time, getting worse by the day, barely a smile seen on her.. while Harper is the one schmoozing her family and contacts with teeth bared, so.. this image isn't what you'll get, just fyi:

(also: the only POC actors they had were the perfectionist-stone-faced-bitch's husband and his girlfriend - wife + hubby being secretly separated.) 

The things that the Salon reviewer liked are the same things I did (see below), but imho even those elements weren't enough to save this film from being: 

an infuriating 102 minute-comedy of errors buoyed by a healthy dose of gaslighting 

More cons of the flick are pointed out by denofgeek.com: 

Some of its issues come from the structure of the film, which shoehorns very real queer struggles into wacky rom-com tropes too fluffy to contain the stakes at hand. Meanwhile the choice to have one half of the lead couple be so aggressively and repeatedly cruel—while her high school ex Riley, played by the ever-perfect Aubrey Plaza was standing right there having all the chemistry in the world with the other romantic lead—was a fatal one.

It really was a dramatic plot idea crammed into a fluffy narrative. You can see the conflicting genres fighting to stay alive and they both die a slow, agonisingly dull death throughout the film. The whole *Abby being converted to loving Christmas by Harper inviting her to spend the holidays with her family* thing, only to have Harper force their relationship + Abby into the closet. Straight conversion much? I'm 100% sick of heteronormative bs in my queer Christmas films. 

For the most part, when you're not feeling for Abby's harsh treatment by her would-be fiance and everyone but Riley ignoring her completely, you will be bored af from the lack of festive cheer - not just twinkle lights and boisterous seasonal music, but those good ol' homey family Christmas vibes. With the Harper house + family members, everything's a performance, so that lack of sincerity and warmth makes for a depressing viewing experience: 

^ Jane (one of Harper's 2 sisters) is the only character allowed to be consistently genuine in the narrative (aside from John, but he's restricted mostly to phonecalls, and Riley - but even she's keeping Harper's secrets). Jane is the only character who is naturally vibrant and reminds us of some of the reasons we get excited about Christmas movies: to feel joy and to enjoy the company around us during the holiday season! 🎄☃️🥳 But rather than give us a fun day out with Jane + Abby, we get Abby + the second sister (i don't even remember her name, just BitchFace) which leads to more bad treatment of Abby - this time by two spoiled af no-smile rich kids. *le sigh* Jane carries the spark of honest joy for the entire Harper clan and that is TOO MUCH to expect of one character, let alone a side-character. 😪 

There are so many ways the story could've been tweaked to make more sense and be somewhat enjoyable, including: 

The orphan!Abby thing is just bad. Rather than give Abby a voice, chances to let her personality shine, almost everyone interacts with her to merely briefly express their condolences for her long-dead parents 🙄 

Abby is a pet-minder, ie. she's an animal lover, yet at no point do we see her interact with animals! Not a dog or cat or hamster, no reindeer at the petting zoo, nothing. 🐕🐈🦎🦜🐠

Riley + Abby getting together (even just a kiss) 👄 

Abby + Harper separating so Harper can get her shit together - and then we get several flashforward shots of them separately living their lives (Harper especially), and then meeting back up again - maybe the next holiday season, after some much-needed time apart 🏃‍♀️🤸‍♀️ 

side characters who engage with Abby in a sincere, meaningful way instead of ignoring her (again, we got Riley, but she was outside of the family dynamic) 😊 

MORE FESTIVE CHEER! where were all the staple Christmassy passtimes, the smile-inducing season-specific experiences??? 🎉 

More from denofgeek: 

Where the script gets into trouble is that it doesn’t distinguish between Harper being closeted and her poor treatment of Abby. The two are separate issues and treating them as one does no favors to Harper, nor others struggling with the closet. As Dan Levy’s beautiful monologue late in the movie alludes to, the closet is a safety mechanism—but it’s not a free pass to treat people like garbage. [...] 😟🏳️‍���

Even a brief conversation teasing out that being in the closet doesn’t justify how Harper acted, and that plenty of people in the closet don’t treat others like trash, would have been important. Instead once Harper is out (which the movie takes pains to make clear only happened because Harper’s sister Sloane outed her), and a gesture so small it could never credibly be called grand is made, all bad behavior is washed away. [...] 😤🙅‍♀️ 

The jarring underlying issue is that 'Happiest Season' attempts to apply the standard rom-com and made-for-TV-holiday-movie tropes to queer life. So Abby having to go back into the closet isn’t framed as a painful regression or being forced to deny an essential part of herself, but rather a fun twist, in the vein of “but the guy she insulted on the plane is the owner of the ornament factory she has to impress to win the Christmas contest!”🚪😒 

All of Harper’s behavior adds up to making her feel like something the audience wants Abby to be free of, not someone Abby should be fighting for. Once Riley tells Abby about Harper’s cruelty in high school, where Harper outed Riley and mocked her rather than standing up for her or finding an excuse that protected them both, it becomes incredibly difficult to root for the lead couple to get back together, or for Harper at all. 👏💃 

With this information, Harper’s other transgressions go from frustrating to part of a larger pattern. Sadly, it’s a pattern Harper repeats when her sister outs her and she throws Abby under the (lesbian) bus. 🤬 

FAVE THINGS: 

all interactions between John (Dan Levy) + Abby (he's witty, honest, and 100% the most entertaining element of the entire film; i wish we'd gotten more of him) 😆 

Riley (Aubrey Plaza, Harper's ex) + Abby's scenes together because CHEMISTRY, both between the characters and the actors 👩‍❤️‍👩

Notable between Abby + Riley scenes include 3 instances of Riley comforting Abby's hurt: outside at the fancy party (Abby feeling excluded/ignored/not worth anyone's time due to the way they treat her even though they don't know she's gay), at a gay bar in town (sandwiched by scenes where Abby's made to feel like crap by Harper), and at the fancy home Christmas party where Riley gets Abby something stronger to drink after hearing Abby was going to propose to Harper (but it's been a helluva shitty week and those plans are dead) 👭 

Every scene with Riley was blessed relief from the hurt and discomfort and boredom of the rest of the time with Harper's family. 🤩 

Sister Jane, for being a genuinely fun character 🤗 who was written starkly different to her family and treated somewhat like an outcast 

Aubrey + Kstew killin it in various pantsuits 👀 

In contrast, Riley connects Abby to queerness, bringing her to an LGBTQ bar to decompress and enjoy a Christmas-themed drag performance. It’s the most relaxed and comfortable Abby is on screen since the opening scenes, a chance to glimpse Abby’s authentic self before Harper summons her back to heterosexuality, and where she once again ignores and disappoints her. Riley actually talks to Abby at the various holiday parties whereas Harper keeps leaving her to please her family, especially her father. It’s not hard for the natural chemistry between Plaza and Stewart to take over

I wouldn't watch this film again. For a hopeful Christmasy love story I'd just watch all Abby + Riley's scenes: 

In closing, here's a batshit article title from observer.com that just makes you go, huh? 🧐:

‘Happiest Season’ Isn’t Happy, But That Doesn’t Make It a Bad Rom-Com

Um.. yes, yes it does. 

Rom-Coms are supposed to be fun, light-hearted stories about love even when the plot deals with lying - The Proposal, Sweet Home Alabama - so a movie that leaves you hurting more than comforted in sympathy with one of the main characters because the (apparent) love of their life is treating them like shit, then it doesn't deserve to be in the genre of Rom-Com. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨💞🎬

In summary, Abby and Harper got 5 minutes of happiness in the beginning, and an eventual happy ending after a super rocky middle. The journey was painful and unenjoyable, and it made their happy ending unbelievable and, for Harper, undeserved because of her behaviour through 90% of the story. 

In short: it was not, in fact, the happiest season. 😕👎

[yurimother]

LGBTQ+ Manga Review - Still Sick Volume 1

If I am not careful, I will squander whatever modicum of “credibility” I hold as a reviewer, as I recently have done little other than sing the praises of all the newest Yuri releases. Of course, so much amazing Yuri is coming out in English that I have to review (oh no, the horror), so it is not like I can escape this fate. I guess I shall resign myself to this miserable existence of consuming fantastic Yuri works. Speaking of which, Still Sick is an interesting Yuri manga by Akashi. In many ways, it is a pretty typical story, although workplace romances are still a minority in the genre, they are blessedly on the rise, rivaling the typical schoolyard romances of Yuri. However, two features help Still Sick stand out. The first is the unexpected direction of the plot and characters, and the second is the prominence of Yuri itself within the work, which allows for some great meta-commentary and an unusual Yurijin protagonist.

Makoto Shimizu is an office worker in her late twenties. During the day, she is an ordinary woman, but while at home, she spends her time obsessively watching Yuri anime and creating fan comics of her favorite couples. One day while at a convention, Akane Maekawa, her coworker, discovers her secret hobby. Shimizu is initially horrified but relieved to learn that Maekawa won’t reveal her secret. Further, the younger woman is intrigued and accompanies Shimizu to her home where she (and the readers) are treated to Shimizu’s rantings about her love of Yuri, which sounds like something straight out of the blog of a social recluse with an unhealthy obsession with the genre… ANYWAY, the two become close, and Maekawa eventually accompanies Shimizu to a convention.

At the convention, Maekawa’s past and the nature of their relationship are revealed to Shimizu. The revelation causes Maekawa to become openly hostile towards Shimizu and her passions. I will not spoil the manga, but I will say that it is enthralling and executed flawlessly. The beginning of the manga builds up to the reveal logically, planting clues and creating consistency. However, the information and shift in the story still acts as an unexpected and dramatic twist.

The change in Maekawa and Shimizu’s relationship, and the friction it causes, drives the latter half of the volume. Shimizu slowly tries to wrap her mind around Maekawa and figure out if she is hurting, or scared, or angry. This process is not simple, nor is it easily resolved, similar to the real tensions and strife that many people experience. Fortunately, Shimizu benefits from the guidance of other colleagues, who work to help mend the relationship. By the end, some threads are wrapped up, while others show a clear and exciting path forward for its story and characters.

Speaking of the characters, they are fantastic. While no side characters have much presence, the main characters are so enthralling and complicated that this focus is excused. Shimizu is a sincere Yuri person. Her obsession with and ranting on Yuri is phenomenal and provides some of the work’s best moments. The meta-commentary on Yuri, which includes Shimizu comparing her and Maekawa’s friendship with the beginning stages of Yuri romance stories, although she swears that will never happen. I recognized much of myself in her, from being unsure of sharing the Yuri part of her life with others to the enthusiastic lectures about Yuri. She is irresistibly likable and an excellent protagonist.

Unfortunately, while much of the commentary on and explications of Yuri is accurate, it often misses critical nuances. For example, the manga states that ‘onee-sama’ is “widely used by Bottoms in Yuri manga towards their top where it denotes respect rather than a familial relationship.” This declaration is sometimes true, but the language of “top” and “bottom” implies that the relationship has to be sexual, which is often not the case in Yuri, as the manga itself goes on to state later. It may not have been possible to communicate these nuances within a narrative manga thoroughly, but the discrepancies irked me.

Maekawa is an equally excellent character. While she starts friendly and vigorous, she becomes much more interesting after her change. While Maekawa is dedicated and passionate, she is also unsure of herself and haunted by her past. She acts cruelly towards Shimizu, but her rudeness makes sense given her situation. The exact reasoning for Maekawa’s cruelty is not explicitly stated but instead shown brilliantly in her actions. It appears to be a combination of jealousy, resentment, spite, and many other mixed emotions informed by her past. Akashi places a great deal of trust in the reader to piece together Maekawa’s psyche alongside Shimizu, and this risk pays off wonderfully.

The relationship between Shimizu and Maekawa is incredibly dynamic, encompassing parts of friendship, coworkers, teacher and student, and enemies. At no point does it ever appear to settle on one label but instead is human and layered as the two women struggle with each other and themselves. While the work will likely end up with the pair getting together, which is incredibly predictable, some more interesting results may come from that union. Shimizu claims to be straight and only interested in Yuri conceptually, “I don’t care about flesh and bloom women!” However, this statement appears to be a reaction to being bullied in school and called a lesbian. She even attempted unsuccessfully to have a relationship with one of her male coworkers. A romance between her and Maekawa will not only require them to continue working to overcome the barriers in their relationship, but Shimizu must to terms with lesbian identity.

I have little to say about the art. I like the character designs. They are mostly consistent and well-drawn enough, although, in a few panels, usually ones where they are shown from far away, they can look horrifically under-detailed. Background and objects are just what they need to be; they help make the world around the characters but do not show anything beyond that. While there are a few slight moments of Yuri related service, such as one character falling on top of the other, pinning her to a bed, and a singular kiss, the work is very tame.

Tokyopop did a fantastic job putting together Still Sick. Huge props to translator Katie Kimura, editor Lena Atanassova, and everyone else who worked on it. I was especially relieved to see that all mentions of “Yuri” were left as such and not changed to “girls’ love,” as Tokyopop describes the manga on its website. I do, however, question the choice to translate doujinshi to “fan zines” which jarred me every time I read it.

Still Sick is an excellent Yuri manga with some of the best characters I have ever seen. It is a Yuri manga for Yuri people, featuring a high degree of self-awareness and intelligence. The plot is intricate and mature, continuously evolving and changing in natural and compelling ways. I verbally gasped “wow” while reading it the first time through and can give it nothing less than my wholehearted approval and eager support as I await the second volume. This manga comes as close to a perfect score as I have given in a while. It just made a few too many minuscule blunders for me to award it a 10. However, you do not want to miss Still Sick! It is easily one of the best Yuri series out there.

Ratings: Story – 10 Characters – 10 Art – 6 LGBTQ – 6 Lewd – 1 Final – 9

PURCHASE STILL SICK HERE: https://amzn.to/2ZzZP2H

Review copy provided by Tokyopop

[franklyautistic]

Alternatives to H*rry P*tter

Given Robert Galbraith’s recent decision to become a Death Eater (”I just don’t want mudbloods in pure-blood spaces”), I am sure many people are looking for new fandoms to get involved in. So here are two great literary fantasy worlds to get stuck into.

I have strictly stuck to 1) fantasy, and 2) series, so great SFF authors like @annleckie, @neil-gaiman, @charliejane-anders, @jscalzi, @maryrobinette, Annalee Newitz, Yoon Ha Lee, and many more had to miss out. Particular shout-outs to Anders and Lee, who are both trans, and Newitz and Leckie in particular have handled trans issues very well in their writing.

(If anyone is looking for recommendations of stand-alone works, or sci fi, or more queer-focused works, or anything else, then hit me up and I can throw ideas at you.)

All these books share two key things: characters who jump off the page and into your heart, and

So, without further ado:

N.K. Jemisin’s Broken Earth trilogy

There is a paradox in recommendation: the better something is, the less one wants to say about it, in case it spoils the experience. With most stories, one does not want to spoil the dramatic twists and turns, the surprises, the emotional highs and lows. And the Broken Earth trilogy has all of that. There are several major twists in the first book alone. There are characters you will love, and others you will despise with intense venom, and some who will make you feel both at once. This is a series full of triumph and despair, wonder and amazement. But you could have all the plot twists spoiled for you and it wouldn’t diminish your enjoyment of this book. The emotion is never cheap, but built up through excellent thematic work which gives the series a huge amount of depth and subtlety.

Jemisin is a middle-aged black woman, not a demographic frequently represented in epic fantasy stories like this, but here she wears her blackness and femininity with pride. This story could not have been written by anyone other than a black woman, a proud feminist and black rights advocate. It’s a staggering work which will make you feel intense feelings in even the most mundane details.

Did I mention that all three books won the Hugo Award? That’s a huge deal, completely unprecedented. By any measure, these are historically important fantasy books.

Lastly, there is a trans character who has a significant supporting role, receives lots of development, and who finds a loving, accepting community. She is not fetishised, and while her transness is made explicit on occasion, it does not define her. There are other queer characters, including two very important ones, and a poly relationship. And nearly all the characters are black.

Patrick Rothfuss’s Kingkiller Chronicles

I can’t not mention Rothfuss. The first thing you notice about The Kingkiller Chronicles is that Rothfuss’ prose is extremely rich. The story is narrated by Kvothe, who was once the greatest adventurer in the world but has lost his magic, and is now trying to live out his life in peace. As well as the great prose, Rothfuss excels at character development. Kvothe is never allowed to get comfortable. His life is constantly driven forwards, and his character builds along with it. And there’s some really good payoff in the form of a few great “crowning moments of awesome” when Kvothe masters a skill.

I will say that some of the sex scenes are rather cringeworthy. I hope that this is intentional, with Kvothe being deliberately portrayed as an arrogant guy who plays up his sexual conquests. But he isn’t just a bad boy

There are no trans characters that I am aware of. There are two obviously gay characters who are in a relationship with each other. While there is a range of female characters, the depictions of women are occasionally a little limited - it’s a step above Tolkien but far from perfect.

And given that this is about Galbraith - in 2015 Rothfuss unthinkingly shared a transphobic New York Times article. It would have been easy for him to claim it was a mis-click, or to double down, just like Galbraith. Instead, he owned up to his ignorance and committed to listening to trans voices and becoming better informed.

Laini Taylor - Daughter of Smoke and Bone

Karou is a young artist who collects teeth for a mysterious benefactor, who might be the devil.

This starts out as an atmospheric urban fantasy book, but builds into a sprawling epic, full of tension, some really brutal scenes, and also lots of feely goodness. Characters bare their souls, get them torn up in their face, pick up the scraps, pull them back together again, and do it all again. Themes include identity, memory, transformation, appearances, good and evil, and love. And once you’re done with the trilogy, there is a weakly-related duology (Strange The Dreamer and Muse of Nightmares) to crack on with.

The nature of most of the characters in the original trilogy makes applying human labels difficult. There is an explicitly asexual character who is shown in a romantic relationship, but the first clearly same-sex relationships don’t show up until the later duology, which is slightly disappointing given the first series focuses on romance. However, I think Taylor’s works very much lend themselves to being read through a queer lens, particularly from a gender perspective.

-----

That’s what I have for you. The intent here is to recommend brilliant fantasy series that can replace Harry Potter in your heart. If you’d like queerer SFF, or black SFF, Asian SFF, or anything else, let me know and I can pull a recommendation post together.

[monysmediareview]

Juliet, a novel by Ann Fortier Review

This time I have a review for a one-off book rather than a series for you guys and it may have actually reached the top of my list for favorite books ever. Juliet, a novel by Anne Fortier was so incredibly good I worry I’ll never be able to fully describe the way it made me feel reading it. I read this book incredibly slow because the idea of finishing it made me so upset; I didn’t want it to end but also found myself thinking about it constantly.

The Shakespeare of it All

When I found this book at goodwill, I figured I’d grab it just to see what it was. Having a degree in theatre and having studied Shakespeare in Europe, I even work for a Shakespeare specific theatre; I figured it would at the very least be interesting. And I was right, but for the wrong reasons. Shakespeare is barely mentioned as the book is actually about the true story of Romeo & Juliet.

If you don’t already know, Shakespeare stole the story of Romeo & Juliet from an Italian poet who wrote the story in the early to mid 1500’s. That story may have also been stolen from another author from France, and maybe even someone else before that. Thanks to the lack of records or copyright laws, there’s not really a way to be sure but we do know that Shakespeare was not the first, only the most famous. And to be fair, his story is much more intense since it takes place over the course of less than a week while the original plot takes months. There are a few other differences between the two but the gist of it is, two star crossed lovers separated by family feuds and ending in tragedy. And this book takes us through all of that drama and gives us a beautiful and dramatic ending to it all.

The Real Story

Some of the things I loved about this book were actually the historical events and characters. The three families in the story, the Tolomeis, the Salimbenis, and the Marescottis were apparently all real families that had feuds and stories fairly similar to what happened in this book. Fortier wrote in her authors note that she did take some liberties with the history for the sake of the story but that she tried to be faithful to them. I do highly suggest reading her author’s note if you get the book because for me, it made it that much more special.

I think that her ability to blend the past and present was well executed and emotional in ways I wasn’t expecting. I really felt the connection between the Romeo and Giulietta of 1340 and the Romeo and Guiletta of the early 2000’s. Her ability to connect these people not only by blood but by fate and destiny and emotion and passion is unmatched and she managed to do it in roughly 500 pages.

Divine Intervention

I am normally not a fan of books with religious undertones, especially without some kind of supernatural explanation to it but in Juliet it really didn’t strike me as prevalent even though it was. The Virgin Mother and the “curse on both your houses” are two huge driving forces behind this story. Both felt like completely natural pieces of the puzzle rather than an overbearing push for Catholic guilt which could have easily been the case in a story set in Italy spanning 600 years with generational family drama. There was a real feeling of the Virgin Mother being the overseer of the fate of these people and bringing them together, to righting the wrongs done in the past. In a lot of other books this might have felt preach-y or overbearing but it actually made fate feel real.

Love Story

I’m a sucker for a good romance book; I will read love story after love story after love story, but even I can get tired of the same plot over and over again. Sometimes the misogyny gets tiring and I want these female led stories to be about more than finding a man to complete them and this book gave me exactly that.

The story starts and ends with Julie Jacobs’ family. She needs to learn about her family, about her history, where she’s really from. I got so sucked into her journey of self discovery that I kind of forgot it was a love story for a while. And that kind of messed me up when we got there because I had missed a lot of the chemistry build up that I had to think back about to even realize it was there. I was so focused on her learning about her father and visiting banks and libraries that I nearly missed her falling completely in love. But in the end it was one of the most passionate and tumultuous love stories, because when you’re Romeo & Juliet, how could you have anything else?

My Personal Opinion on R&J

Following that I want to talk quickly about Romeo & Juliet. If you’ve taken a Shakespeare class or even just a high school English class at some point you’ve probably talked about this. Sometimes it gets glossed over because it’s one of the well known stories and they don’t usually waste time on it but I’m going to.

Classes like this tend to brush these lovers off as horny teenagers who are in lust and get married so they can bone each other but I think that’s a sad approach. I’ll even admit that was my view on it for a while, but not now. It’s a love story. It’s the love story. So to read an in depth story like this that doesn’t diminish the real feelings they had for each other was very pleasing. I might write a whole thing about some of my Shakespeare opinions one day but for now I will leave you with this:

To thine own self be true. Shakespeare is theatre. It isn’t mean to be read, it’s meant to be staged. And the beauty of theatre is that every single production of every play is different (at least it’s supposed to be. Some directors have yet to learn this, but I digress). This means that everyone interprets things differently, so while I think Romeo & Juliet are the ultimate lovers, you might think they were just horny teenagers. And that’s okay.

Generational Drama

Generational stories like this hold a special place in my heart. I’m not sure what it is exactly, but the idea of fate and family and stories that span hundreds of years just really get me. I won’t go on about this too much because I’ve already mentioned it a few times but I love the redemption that Romeo and Guilietta get through their ancestors, even if it was 600 years later. I love that their love lasted generations and the thought of how the spirits of the original couple feel looking at themselves, their ancestors, finally bringing their families together chokes me up a little if I’m being honest.

Alessandro

I was really not counting on Alessandro being such an important piece of this story, but his evolution as a character was a fucking ride. Going from a security guard/driver, to basically an undercover cop, to potential lover, to fake identity, to actual lover, to liar and cheat, to being framed and actually being a lover and savior was intense. Ideal. I loved and hated him through the whole thing but I was very happy with where he ended up.

Symbolism

There is so much symbolism in this book. The gems being the color of their eyes, the golden statues, the paintings, the maestros. All of it. It can be found on almost every page. But there were a few that really stood out to me.

The cencio and dagger constantly popping up as important of the story for Giulietta was not lost on me. I’m still tossing around what I think it really means, actually, but where I stand now is the idea of an official marriage and what makes it official in the eyes of the Virgin Mother. Romeo and Giulietta weren’t considered actually married because they never consummated and it didn’t happen on the cencio if it had. So for it to have been hidden in Julie’s bed after that weird secret ceremony with Alessandro, was interesting because they also weren’t really married. Not the way we think of now. It just shows that marriage isn’t defined by sex (which I think futher proves my point that this was never just about horny teenagers. As well as the entirety of this book), or by words. Marriage is defined by love and commitment.

And then there’s the River Diana. Another thing I haven’t quite landed on a full meaning for, but I know what it made me feel. It’s hard to put into words, but the first word that came to mind was literally symbolism. This story, this curse, killed Diana, Julie’s mother. And now Julie made it to the statue, and she found her Romeo and in the moment that she almost dies it’s by drowning in the River Diana. This whole time she was drowning in what her mother started for her and it’s Alessandro that pulls her out and saves her from it. Being with him is what keeps her alive, from being swept away by this curse the way her mother was. So maybe it’s symbolic of the end. Of not falling into the same pattern or being swept into the same current.

Plot Twists

This story never went where I thought it was going to go. I don’t actually want to talk about the plot twists too much because I want people reading this to be as surprised as I was. Not like I didn’t spoil things before but there are still quite a few things I didn’t mention that really fucked me up if I’m being honest.

If you’re a fan of plot twists, please read this book.

Ye Olde Slow as Hell Language

I don’t want to scare anyone off here - most of the book is in modern language and even the parts that take us back to 1300 aren’t that bad. But they are far more detailed and can sometimes just feel really slow. But all of the information is really important so I wouldn’t skip it. But the language and the flow of the story really slows things down in these parts and it’s what made me take so long to finish this book. Well that and the fact that I just wouldn’t know what to do with myself if I finished it too soon.

However, I will give the author credit for having parallel story lines set so far apart. She really pulled it off and made the entire thing just so magical. By the time they died, I didn’t want to leave that world. I wanted to stay and watch them be happy but then I got to go back to Julie and watch her get her happily ever after

Janet’s Character Development

Right off the bat we’re supposed to hate Janet. And we do. She’s awful and when she shows back up we kind of hate her even more because of what she’s been doing. I didn’t feel sorry for her in the slightest. Up until the last few chapters of the book, these twin sisters felt very estranged so to go from that to them being a fantastic duo that you root for was a twist I wasn’t ready for but whole heartedly welcomed. It was a nice change of pace to see a female character arc into a better person instead of someone who got increasingly bitter. Still not a huge fan of the character but she ended up being kind of important and at least it passed the Betchdel test, right?

In Conclusion

I think this might be my favorite book now. High recommend.

[ms-rampage]

Eden's Gate: Kidnapped Chapter 16 - The News, The Crash

It's the penultimate before the series finale.

word count: 3k+

Warnings: Swearing, some light smut, some angst, some fluff, mild violence, kidnapping, a huge fucking reveal/plot twist. Paige (Dean) and Kate (Sam) have a Supernatural moment.

Paige heard everything Kate had said to John, she knows how much Kate loves him, and she never understood why she loved him so much after everything he has done not only to her but to the locals.

She thinks Kate is better off dating Wheaty, or some of the younger non psychopathic, non Seed guys/girls that live in Hope County. She continues to hear their conversation from outside the kitchen.

“So you really do care about me?” he asks.

She nods her head, “Yes”. 

“But I can’t be with you” she adds.

He looks at her like she just said no to his marriage proposal. 

She has tears rolling down her cheeks, her hot tears rolling down her cold cheeks.

“I understand” he responds,

She wasn’t expecting that to be his response. 

“On that February day, 2 years ago, you were walking your dog Haley. You walked past Falls End church, and I fell in love with you immediately, and I still remember what you were wearing. You were wearing a black, and green flannel shirt, gray jeans, black boots, your hair was down. Haley’s leash and collar were purple”

Kate’s eyes widened, she can’t believe John remembered what she wore that day, and let alone the color of Haley’s leash and collar. 

“You drove past the church in your black 70 Monte Carlo, I yelled out “Nice car”, and you said thank you, followed by a honk of your horn, I sent you flowers, and gifts because I wanted to somehow win you over because that’s how much I wanted you, and I still do. I saved your from that asshole who tried to rape you, and that drunk asshole from the Spread Eagle”.

Kate remembers all those days, she feels like a complete cunt for doing this to John. Yeah he fucking tortured people for their sins but that’s no excuse for her to be with him.

Yeah, he treated her well, he took care of her, he spoiled the hell out of her, he was there when she needed him, and she was there when he needed her. They both took care of each other, he loved her, he was crazy about her.

But he still forced people to join the cult, to confess, atone, and baptism. She hid a lot of her secrets about herself from him, because she didn’t want to scare him off.

When Merihem attacked her friends on their camping trip, she knew it was a demon when her friend Alissa said “A man with blackened eyes”. 

Her friend Dylan said the exact same thing. She accidentally let out that information about her in front of John. She knew she had to tell him about her past, whether or not he believed her.

Paige walks away from the kitchen, and goes upstairs to her room. Kenny walks in holding Cristina, asking her “Hey, you okay?” 

She nods her head, “Yeah, I was just-just over hearing Kate and John’s conversion in the kitchen”. 

He sits next to her, “And?”.

“He’s in love with her. Still. He remembered what she wore the day he first saw her, the color of her dog's collar, and leash. Everything he did for her, how he protected her from some rapist, and a drunk fuck”.

She sighs into her hands.

“So what are we gonna do about John?” he asks.

“We’ll keep him here, until I figure out a plan” she responds. 

“Which is?” he asks, uncertain 

“I don’t know. I know his henchmen are gonna come, and find him. I know that already”

They stay silent for a few minutes.

“Unless, tomorrow is Saturday, and Joseph has sermons on Sundays. Because if John doesn’t show up. Joseph is gonna be concerned why John isn’t there. And we just kill them all” she says.

“That’s a good plan, but I think we should really think it through” he tells her.

“Yeah, you're right” she responds.  

A few hours later, it's after 9PM, and John is still tied to a chair in the kitchen. 

Paige walks in, and sees him.

“Ooh, I forgot you were still here” she says to him. As she goes into the fridge

He mimics her as a response. 

Shortly after Mandy walks in.

“Hey” she says, with something clearly bothering her. 

She’s holding a white envelope. 

“Is Kate around?” she asks. 

“She went outside” John mumbles, through his gag.

“Thank you” she responds. 

“Well I want everyone to be here, when I say this” she says.

“What’s wrong?” Paige asks.

“I want everyone here” she says again.

“Kenny!!!!, Kate!!!!!, Guys!!!! Come to the kitchen!!!!” Paige yells out.

“What!?!?!” Martin yells from behind her, making her jump.

“You dick” she laughs.

Everyone comes downstairs, and Kate comes back inside.

“What’s going on?” she asks.

“Mom, has something to say to us” she says.

“Well actually Paige this is about you” she says

Paige looks at her confused. 

Mandy holds out the white envelope to her, and says. 

“I’m sure Jacob mentioned to you that he was in the Army” she says.

“Yeah, he was in dad’s unit in Iraq, they knew each other. He went on to insulting him, and calling him a coward and shit” she says.

Mandy looks down at the floor, “Open it” she says softly, slightly pointing to the envelope.

Paige opens the envelope, pulling out black and white photos.

The first face she sees is her dad Joel, next to him is a few guys, and a young Jacob Seed.

“Is that dad, and Jacob?” she asks. 

She flips the photo over, and reads “Iraq 11/1990” on the back.

Kate, Kenny, and all the guys stand behind her trying to get a glimpse at the photos.

The next photo she pulls out is one of Joel, and Jacob from what it looks like outside of a barracks in the desert. 

She flips the photo over, and “Iraq 10/1990” is written on the back.

The next photo is of Joel, Jacob and she can’t really tell what the name says but she’s sure it says Miller walking down a desert road in their full Army desert gear with assault rifles.

The back of the photo says “Iraq 01/1991”.

Everyone is looking over her shoulders, trying to get a glimpse of the photos.

Hell John is trying to seek a peek while tied to the chair.

“I mean yeah, dad and Jacob worked together in the Gulf War but that doesn’t really change everything” she says, tossing the photos on the kitchen table. 

Allowing John to have a look at them. 

Mandy grabs the envelope and pulls out a piece of paper. 

“Your dad also wrote a letter to Jacob, after he was discharged from the Army, both of them were at the same military hospital in Georgia. Your dad was able to leave before Jacob. Your dad moved in with me and my family, we got married in summer of 1992, we bought our first house a few months later. We even invited Jacob to the wedding but I guess he wasn’t able to make it. When I was pregnant with you Paige, your father wrote another letter to Jacob in September of 1994. This one is a copy but he should’ve gotten the original one” 

She hands her the letter, she unfolds it, and reads it.

To Jacob Seed 

I'm not sure if you'll get this letter, I was told you were still at the military hospital where we were staying when we were discharged.

I hope you're doing well, I know you're not the same man from before we went to Iraq.

Neither am I. I still get night terrors, I have PTSD and insomnia, I hope you get reunited with your brothers, I remember you used to talk about them a lot, Joseph and John right?. Well the reason why I'm writing to you is I really hope you're doing well, I hope you get reunited with your brothers and I also want to say that Mandy is pregnant, we're having a girl and I wanted to ask if you want to be her Godfather? Because you were always like a brother to me, we've both been through Hell and back, we've had our share with our personal demons, and all the shit we went through in that desert Hell. I hope to hear from you. Best regards

Sincerely Joel Winchester written 9/17/1994

Paige slowly folds the paper back into a square, tears falling from her face.

Just by the tears falling from her eyes, John wants to know what was said about his older brother from that letter. 

Paige tries to even out her breathing, Kenny is holding her from behind, trying to relax her.

“Jacob-Jacob was-was supposed to be my-my Godfather??” she asks, tears making her choke on her words.

Mandy nods with tears running down her face.

John is looking back and forth at Mandy and Paige. “Wait. wait!!” he mumbles.

Kate takes the gag out of his mouth.

“Hold on, my brother was supposed to be her Godfather?!?!?!!?” he asks, pointing his towards Paige. 

“Yes” Mandy answers softly.

Paige hasn’t said anything, too in shock to comprehend the man who tortured her for months, insulted her father, who he worked with during the war, and supposed to be her Godfather!!.

Her whole world was turned upside down by a piece of paper her dad wrote before she was even born.

“Paige you okay?” Kate asks.

“Honey you alright?” Kenny asks.

Paige’s mind goes blank, everything is happening too fast. Then it hit.

She had the sudden urge to vomit, she runs to the bathroom, and retched into the toilet. 

“I don’t know if she told you already but she’s pregnant” Mandy says to Kenny.

“What?!?!” he says, in shock. He goes to the bathroom, and knocks on the door.

“Paige? Honey you okay?” he asks through the door.

“Yeah” she wheezes out, before vomiting again.

“Your mom just told me you’re pregnant, is that true?” 

“Yes” she says, before vomiting again. 

Tears run down his cheek, he leans against the wall next to the bathroom door.

After a couple minutes, the toilet flushes, and the door opens.

Paige steps out looking a little pale, and red at the same time. 

“You okay?” he asks again.

She nods her head, “Yeah”.

She wraps her arms around him, hugging him tightly.

He kisses the top of her head.

Kate unties John from the chair, Paige and Kenny walk into the kitchen as she does this.

“What are you doing?” she asks Kate.

“We’re not really gonna leave him like this all night are we?” she asks.

“I wasn’t planning on it but I was okay with it” she says, sarcastically.

“Love you too Paige” John says, in a sassy tone.

“Yeah, don’t say those words to me” she says, hands on her hips.

“He can sleep in my room” Kate says, somewhat hesitantly.

 Paige gives her a stern look “Umm no he isn’t”.

“Umm yes he is” she sasses back.

“Fine,” she says, putting her hands up in defeat. 

“I’m too pregnant to be arguing with you about this” she says before she leaves the kitchen to go upstairs.

Kate rolls her eyes in annoyance, and says to John.

“She said the same thing when she was pregnant with Cristina”.

30 minutes later, everyone is getting ready to go to bed.

John, who doesn’t have any extra clothes, sleeps in his boxers.

Kate has her back to the man she onced loved, and is gonna share her bed with him one last time. 

She feels his weight on the bed next to her, his hand runs up her back.

Sending shivers down her spine. 

“You okay darling?” he asks. Laying on his side with one of his hands on her lower back.

She nods her head “Yeah I’m fine”.

She looks back at him with a smile.

Those piercing blue eyes of his, she knows she's gonna miss them.

She goes under the covers, and turns off the lights. 

He does the same thing, he looks over at her.

“Kate?” he whispers. 

“Yeah?” she replies.

“What happened to us?” he asks.

“Too much stuff to list” she answers.

“Yeah” he whispers.

She lays on her to face him, his eyes once again piercing into her soul.

“Have I ever told you, you have very beautiful eyes?” she asks, running her fingers through his beard.

He smiles at her “No, you haven’t”.

She smiles back at him ”Well you do”

He pulls her closer to him, where their noses touch. 

He leans in and softly kisses her lips. She hasn’t felt his lips in almost 2 years.

When she left Hope County, and moved back to Jackson, Wyoming. 

One thing lead to another, and the next thing she knew they were having sex, for the 1st time in 2 years. 

He felt amazing, his cock buried deep inside her, rubbing against the walls of her tight pussy.

Making her hold back her moans, and whimpers. He hasn't changed his game at all. He thrusts in and out of her, her hands roaming his back as fucks her. She missed his dick inside of her, how he held her as he penetrates her.

She knows this is wrong but it feels so right, she actually hates herself right now.

The next thing she knew it was morning, and she feels guilty about having sex with John.

She’s supposed to hate him, and yet she slept with him. She protected him, and still is!.

She sits up in her bed slowly trying not to wake him up. 

She sits there for a few minutes, she gets a message from Wheaty saying. 

“Hey K, check out this song” followed by a link to a video of the song.

She zones out, realizing her feelings for Wheaty.

After what just happened the night before, Kate finally realizes who she wants to be with. 

Part of her still loves John but she knows she can't be with him, at all. 

She gets out of bed, gets dressed, putting on black jeans, boots and a flannel shirt. 

She looks over at John who is dead asleep in her bed, looking at him one last time because she knows she's gonna have to let him go. 

It's for her own good, she's taking Paige's advice and is moving on from him. She quickly goes downstairs nearly colliding with her mom.

"Kate, where are you going?" Paige calls out.

"I'll be back!!!" she responds, running to her car.

She starts it up, and drives off the property, leaving behind a cloud of dirt.

“What is she up to?” Mandy asks.

“I don’t know, but I’m gonna have to find out” Paige responds. 

Kate drives down the road leaving Holland Valley into the Whitetail Mountains.

She gets to the area of the Wolf’s Den, climbing up the hill.

She sees the bunker door open as usual, and she walks down the dark steps.

“Wheaty?!” she calls out.

Wheaty, who is putting away records, hears her voice, he looks back at Eli and Tammy, and goes to where her voice is. 

Eli, and Tammy hear her, and they follow behind him.

“Is that Kate?” Eli asks.

She makes it to the bottom of the steps, and the second she sees Wheaty, she crashes her lips against his. Wrapping her arms around him. 

This actually startled Wheaty, he had no idea she was gonna come by, but he’s glad she did. He’s had a crush on her the moment he met her, when she first moved to Hope County a few years ago before she met John Seed.

He wraps his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. Kate knows she has to let John go, her family, and his family are enemies and she doesn’t want the whole Romeo and Juliet vibe. Let alone Paige wants to kill him for marking her with her sins, and just straight up annoying her. 

Part of her still loves John, but all he’ll ever be to her is an ex lover, maybe not much of a friend

She pulls away from their kiss, resting her head against his chest, neck area. 

“I know we’ve kissed before, but I’ve been waiting for our moment like this” he says, taken back by what just happened. Holding her tightly. 

“Yeah, me too” she says, holding him.

Tammy and Eli see them kissing, and they go back to whatever they were doing. 

Letting the soon to be couple have their privacy 

He kisses the top of her head, they stay like this for a few more minutes, and they hear footsteps coming down the bunker stairs. 

And they see Paige, and she sees Wheaty and her sister hugging.

Kate looks back at her, “Hey Paige” Wheaty says, smiling at her not letting go of Kate.

She smiles at them saying, “You’re finally over John”.

She nods at her older sister, “Yeah I finally got over him”.

A proud smile on her face 

“I heard what you said to John last night, about when you 2 first met” she says, crossing her arms.

“You heard that?” she asks, still holding Wheaty.

“Yeah, I heard everything, and to be honest I’m glad it was now instead of never, and I know how much he took care of you, but he’s not a good person. No matter how good he treated you” Paige says.

Kate nods her head, “Yeah me too. I know he wasn’t a good person, I just don’t know why it took me this long to realize it”

“Its fine, I’ll admit as much as I fucking hate to admit. John, he is a very handsome man, who probably has a golden dick, and he has a good job other than cutting off people’s skin, he’s a lawyer” she says, before saying “Or at least he thinks he is”.

The 3 of them laugh.

“Where is John?” Kate asks.

“At the house with everyone else” she replies.

“Hey Paige, I’m sorry for not listen-”

She cuts her off, by saying “No chick flick moments”

Kate scoffs, “Alright, jerk”

“Bitch” Paige responds. 

Wheaty looks at the both of them confused.

Paige gets a phone call from her mom, and she answers it.

“Hey mom, whats-” she gets cut off by her mom yelling in panic.

“Paige!!!, Paige!!! I need you and Kate to come home now!!” she yells in panic.

“Wait, wait mom, what's going on over there?!!” 

Kate and Wheaty look at her in concern.

Paige puts her phone on speaker.

“It's the peggies!!!!, they're here!!!!. John called for them!!!” 

Tammy, and Eli hear the commotion.

“That son of bitch” Paige mumbles in anger.

“It's the peggies, they took Adrian, Martin and Cody” she exclaims. 

“What??” Paige exclaims.

“Mom where are you?!?” Kate asks, in panic

“I locked myself in one the upstairs bathroom with Cristina” she tries her best to stay calm.

“Where’s Kenny, Nate and Mark!?!?!??” Paige asks.

“They locked themselves in one of the other rooms” she says. 

“Shit, sit tight we’ll be there soon” Paige says hanging up.

“Hurry!!!!!” she exclaims. 

“What is happening!?!” Eli asks, concerned in his voice.

“That lawyer fucker John called his merrymen of peggie douchebags, and they took 3 of my friends, and now they’re going after the others including my infant daughter!!!”

Paige and Kate run outside the bunker to the Impala, leaving Kate’s car behind.

“Paige, Kate!!!. Are you gonna need backup?!???!!” Eli yells out.

“If I don’t call back in 1 hour, get everyone, and go to St. Francis or Joseph’s compound. Wherever they could’ve taken them” Paige yells out back to Eli.

They speed down the road, not slowing down for anything. Driving 75 in 40 zone.

“Those motherfuckers, I’m gonna kill that little shit John” Paige yells out.

“No!” Kate says, loud and sternly.

Paige looks at her with anger. “Are you fucking seriousl? You’re still protecting that little shit?”

“No, if anyone is gonna kill John it's gonna be me” she says looking over at Paige.

“I let him loose, it's my fault. I’ll take full responsibility for that, and I’ll kill him” 

As they’re driving through an intersection they get hit from the driver side by a truck.

Sending the Impala tumbling through a field. Both sisters unconscious. 

They get dragged out of the vehicle by some peggies, putting them in the back of a truck, and driving off.

Paige, and Kate wake up several hours later, and the whole setting is too familiar to Paige, she starts to panic when she sees that she’s back in a cage at the Veteran’s Centre. 

She looks behind her, and Kate is struggling to wake up, disoriented and in pain.

All 4 Seed siblings appear in front of them. 

Both of them, in shock, and in disbelief.

Smug smiles on John and Jacob’s face that Paige would love to pimp slap off their faces.

“No, no” she says, shaking her head. 

She sees Joseph looking down while holding a purple,white plaid blanket, and she sees that he’s holding her daughter.

“No, no, no!!!!!!” she screams in panic.

[stevensavage]

Strange Days: Regretful Artificial Memories

(This column is posted at www.StevenSavage.com and Steve's Tumblr.  Find out more at my newsletter.)

Strange Days is one of those films more people have heard about than seen. "That cyberpunk film with Ralph Fiennes" is how I usually hear it summed up. Though this 1995 movie has quite a pedigree - written by James Cameron, directed by Kathryn Bigelow - it did not do well in the theater. When I saw it recently, I could see why; Strange Days is a mostly-courageous, mostly-creative film that mostly ignored popular trends.

Seen now, one can see the audacity, and though there are flaws of the "mostly" variety, there's much to take away.

The Hollow Man

In 1999, right before the end of the millennium, ex-cop Lenny is busy selling the ultimate high - people's recorded memories. A recording technology called SQUID, once meant for police work, now serves as a way to relive people's experiences. A bustling underground in other's lives emerged, and the sleazy-but charming Lenny is ready to make a buck.

When we meet Lenny (Ralph Finnes), he's reliving the memories of a crime someone else committed - another high on a portable disk. We soon realize his entire life is trading memories, some contracted for, some sold, all with a market. He relishes his role as a merchant of dreams, even if a little bit of con and trickery is needed.

But Lenny's life and joy are as false as his fake designer watches. When not trading for experiences, he keeps reliving his life with his former girlfriend Faith (Juliette Lewis). She's moved on to live with eccentric but powerful music producer Philo (Michael Wincott), while Lenny keeps reliving the same days off of a disk. His life is just a loop of other people's memories and his recorded ones.

The film explores Lenny slowly and has a rare quality - the courage to explore a concept. The SQUID is the only difference between our worlds, and our gateway to Lenny's world is Lenny. By seeing his life - and his addiction - we get a natural feel for the impact of technology on people.  

Of course, Lenny, is missing a lot of what's going on.

A Small Man In The Big Picture

Lenny's world is a small one of recordings, sales, and his two friends. Detective Max (Tom Sizemore, as charmingly sleazy as Fiennes) helps him with cons and provides information. Bodyguard and driver Mace (an incredible Angela Bassett) provides transport and muscle, as well as common sense. They also help him navigate the larger world - and his problems because Lenny is a damaged man.

The Los Angeles of the film is damaged as well and all too believable. Police brutality is a constant, and communities conflict. The murder of a famous Rapper on Philo's label threatens to set the city aflame. One can almost understand why Lenny finds customers - who wouldn't want to escape?  Lenny's own withdrawal and delusions seem entirely sensible.

Lenny may be trying to escape himself, but he can't escape after consuming a random memory disk someone dropped in his car.

Hell Is Other People

The memories Lenny finds are of a brutal rape and murder of a prostitute in his circle - from the killer's view. These scenes are disturbing, raw, and ugly - and pumped straight into Lenny's mind.

Though these vicious memories are horrible on screen, they're made more horrible by seeing Lenny's reaction. We jump-cut between the POV murder and Lenny's horrified expression as he cries and tries to make sense of what he's living. We do not just see what is going on, Fiennes makes us feel what is going on and what he is experiencing.

Despite the disturbing nature of this sequence, the courage of the film is on display here. First, the film extrapolates how a sick mind might use the technology. We've seen Lenny's customers buy sex or POV robberies, but now we're forced to reckon with how far people may go. It's not hard to look at this scene and say, "Yes, people would do this. Yes, they would pay for it."

But just as - or more - courageous is the scene comes off as a critique of POV Slasher movies. Often these films put people in the shoes of the killer as they go about their gruesome business. Through Lenny - and Fiennes's performance - he experiences the killer's mind and how disgusting it is.

Lenny, the dealer of a modern-day electronic drug, has just had the ultimate bad trip.

An Erratic Path

The film follows Lenny, Max, Mace, and the others as they deal with the city on edge, the question of the murder, and their own problems. At this point, summing up the film is both difficult but would also spoil too much.

It would spoil too much because, at heart, this is a kind of murder-mystery film. It is the kind of movie - like a human memory - you have to experience to see the winding path and where it goes. Without spoiling, let us say it is like life - some things are dramatic when small, and some dramatic things turn out to be illusions.  Strange Days isn't afraid to be messy or disappoint you appropriately.

Unfortunately, the difficulty in explaining the film is that sometimes the film overexplains. The film's courage gives out in parts, where you don't have slow revelations but large infodumps. These are not as satisfying, and I could easily give away huge parts in a few sentences - because that's how the film does it.

The ending ends up both exciting and disappointing. There are believable ugly and beautiful plot twists, next to feel-good tropes and violence out of an opera. For all it's courage, too many parts near the end seem contrived to be audience-pleasers. These parts are in stark contrast to the film's, gritty, messy mood - Lenny's world isn't clean, and neither should the end of his tale be.

Seventy-Five Percent Courageous

Though I am critical of parts of the film, I have to applaud the sheer commitment to its core ideas for most of the movie. The film is willing to extrapolate on technology. The story is messy in most of the right splots because life is messy. There are elements that I cannot see people being brave enough to include today.

I may critique the film, but that's because it only falters when it loses that courage that infuses so much of it. The film feels easy in so many ways, sprinting forward with its ideas horrible and wonderful, so when it trips, you feel the jolt. I'll take courage most of the time over cowardice predominating.

None of my critiques are directed at the cast, who are uniformly excellent. Fiennes is absolutely believable as Lenny. Basset's Mace is a real bad-ass. You can feel the cast's courage, and indeed they carry the film when it's bravery isn't apparent.

Stumble Towards Greatness

The lesson that stays with me from the film is that in creativity, courage always beats cowardice. Even partial courage is better when it predominates. This film may not have done well at the box office, but it has been re-evaluated in time, and that validates the flawed bravery of the movie.

Much like its protagonist, the film is imperfect and has shallow moments, but it does keep going.  If you don't stop, maybe you get to a place that's better.

Steven Savage

www.StevenSavage.com

www.InformoTron.com

[themockingcrows]

Tapping With Blue Eyes Ch. 6: Tainted

This chapter is SFW This chapter is available on my AO3

Werewolves, despite their general rarity, are not to be trifled with.

     “You going to tell him?” Dirk asked with an amused smirk. “Or do I just get to see you every day.”

     “Depends. How long are you planning on hanging around botherin’ me?”

     “I’m not bothering you. I’m coming in when you’re not even busy and having a nice conversation instead of fighting and causing a scene,” Dirk said, gesturing to the nearly empty shop and to his cup. “And I’m a paying customer no less. Common courtesy says that some casual conversation is warranted.”

     Dave made a face at him, and went back to sweeping.

     “I should tell him about you creeping around here.”

     “He’d have a fit, and Jake would be amused.”

     “...What, does he not know you come here?”

     “Jake’s.. How do I put this,” mused Dirk, swirling the contents of his cup before taking a sip. “He’s enthusiastic, but he doesn’t plot things like this. It’s too public. Swatting at you here wouldn’t do much good.”

     “Does he know or not.”

     “He knew I came here before,” Dirk admitted. “But he doesn’t know I’m still coming by to say hello like today.”

     “Right. Say hello,” Dave muttered sourly. 

     “That’s what I’m doing, yes. It’s not often I get to speak with other taps. Especially ones that are just normal humans.. I keep expecting you to be something else.”

     Dave glance dup from his sweeping with a frown. “Why’s that? Do I give off a non-human vibe or something?”

     “More like most people would assume James’ son would wind up with a powerful tap. He’s quite special in his own right, if he taps into his potential he’d be quite a threat. ..Except for you.”

     “What do you mean except for me?” Dave asked, frowning deeper. “I’m not a liability.”

     “You’re not. You’re a limiter AND a liability,” Dirk said, sipping his drink again. “I’ll explain more another time, Jake’s going to get antsy if I’m out of range too long. Here’s my number, for if you’re curious and want to know more,” he added, taking the receipt from the coffee out and jotting a phone number down on it. “I can help you learn more about why you’re holding him back.”

     Dave took the number by crumpling it up into a ball with his fist.

     “Right. Yeah. Sure. How considerate of you,” he said, stuffing it into his apron without a second thought.

     “Hey now, I didn’t say it’d not be worth your time. There’s ways you can help him more,” Dirk said with a smirk, this time showing the pointed tips of his teeth. He looked just as angular as before, but somehow far more wild like that. It was somewhat unnerving to look at, the same instinctive fear that John’s fangs sometimes brought out in him still. The inhuman edge of it all.

     Stuffing the number deeper into his work apron, Dave sighed a breath out when Dirk finally left, rubbing the bridge of his nose and wishing he had his shades on during work hours. What a fucking mess.. Hopefully that douchebag wouldn’t be coming back every day or something stupid like that. He finished his shift up before texting John for his pickup, waiting in the back room till he got a return text to come outside. So had become their habit for security’s sake. There was a snack waiting for him, along with a bottle of apple juice, and John’s worried eyes looking him over from head to toe. He was still weak, especially with work bearing down on top of everything, but nowhere near as gray faced as he’d been in the last few days and was only getting better.

     “Have a good shift?”

     “Eh. It was a shift,” Dave said as he buckled in and cracked open the juice for a few thirsty gulps. Phew, that sure hit the spot. “Same old same old.”

     “No interesting characters come through? Must’ve been a slow day if there wasn’t at least one old person complaining that a plain cup of coffee wasn’t listed anywhere despite it being on the list,” John snickered, pulling out of the space he’d parked in, checking behind him by bracing an arm on Dave’s seat and twisting around for certainty before pulling forwards to the street. 

     The number felt like it was burning a hole in his pocket already, burning a hole through the back of Dave’s head, but he held his tongue. This wouldn’t end well.. But then again, neither would keeping secrets at a time like this. He fiddled with the window, the radio, his seat, trying to psyche himself up.

     “What’s wrong? You’re squirming like you’ve got the worst wedgie of your life,” John snorted.

     “Uh. ...Dirk. Came into the store earlier,” Dave said.

     The car screeched to a halt so quickly that Dave’s body pressed hard into the seatbelt, hard enough he’d be surprised if there wasn’t an indention in his skin of some kind even through his work clothes. John frowned and turned on him, concerned, trying to check him over.

     “Fuck, really? Jesus. Why didn’t you mention it first thing?” he asked. “He didn’t try anything, right? Jesus, if he knows where you work that’s not safe, I don’t know what to do if Ja-”

     “It’s fine. He didn’t try anything, just talked and left. Apparently Jake doesn’t know he came there, if he’s to be believed,” Dave said, sitting patiently through the literal pat down before reaching up to grasp John’s hand so he could nuzzle it. “Chill. It’s alright.”

     “It’s not alright,” John insisted, finally putting his hands back on the wheel and leaving for the main road back to Dave’s apartment, looking twice as suspiciously at passerby now that he was on high alert.

     “Okay, okay, it’s not alright. But it’s not as bad as your brain’s makin’ you think, I can guarantee that,” Dave said, watching out the window. The number. The phone number. He had to mention the phone num-

     “What did he say?”

     “...That I was holdin’ you back.”

     John looked over and lifted a brow before snorting and shaking his head. “Holding me back? As if, hah. If anything, I’m going twice as hard in everything because of you being around. Learning wards and all that.. I didn’t really have a reason to worry before.”

     “Maybe because you’re worryin’. Because I’m not able to offer much in return.”

     “If you wanna be crass, you offer tasty as hell blood in return. But you offer plenty of things in return, Dave. Don’t let him get in your head, things are fine how they are between us,” John insisted.

     “You sure I’m not like. Some weak-ass that’s just a statistic waitin’ to happen?” Dave asked, frowning. “I mean, dude’s a werewolf and that asshole feeds off him, doesn’t that give him a boost?”

     “Well.. yes. But I don’t care. Who wants to drink dog blood anyway, yuck. And you’re not a weak ass! I already know what happened when we were at Dad’s and he tested you.”

     Dave frowned at him, not quite believing, but more than happy to let things sink down and dissolve naturally rather than be propped up for another round of No, You. He sighed out through his nose and watched the scenery till they stopped at his apartment, walking into the building with clasped hands that only dropped when it came time to unlock the door.

     John strode past to go check everything out, ensuring the wards were in place still. Dave went to the bathroom and then went to go change, all the while thinking about the number and how he’d manage to talk to Dirk while under guard. Try as he might, the curiosity was really eating at him.

     What if it was true? No matter what John said, he was inexperienced in these matters, he was a hindrance no matter what he wanted to think. No amount of movie knowledge was going to help against the real deal in the heat of the moment, and even the things he’d been taught weren’t going to save him in a two on one fight. He raked his hair out of his face as he dropped his apron and shirt, pulling on a comfortable tee and some baggy sweatpants to slouch around in, wanting to get off of his feet after the long shift.

     Before he could leave the room John came in behind him and laced his fingers together over Dave’s stomach, cuddling up close to his back as he fondly nipped the side of his neck.

     “Hey. Really though, are you okay?”

     “Yeah, yeah I’m just tired man.”

     Tired and fibbing. Tired and lying. Tired and hiding potentially important information. The reaction in the car had been strong enough that the curiosity only got more intense. He knew he was going to poke the hornets nest, all for the sake of some outside information and perspective in this. Dirk, enemy or not, seemed to be the calmest person in this entire bullshit situation. Maybe vampires were just naturally dramatic and this was all more of a fucking game than it felt like.

     ...Or maybe it was more serious, and Dirk just didn’t have any allegiance to Jake beyond being his tap.

     Dave felt the pressure behind his knees before registering he was being lifted up, carried into the living room like a princess and being sat down on the sofa. “Here,” John said. “Go ahead and chill out, I’ll make something for you. Want spicy?”

     “Mm. Not in a spicy mood,” he admitted. “You’re gonna spoil me rotten at this rate though.. Wanting another meal?”

     “Not so soon, duh. Gotta build back up before even thinking of it,” John chuckled. 

     Dinner was stir fry with shrimp and plenty of veggies, heavy on the ginger and soy sauce. Movies carried Dave and John through the evening, till finally there was nothing left but bed. ..mostly. Dave turned his volume down on his phone while John was in the bathroom, added the number from his apron to his new message screen, and sent the first text before he could stop himself at a cool 11pm.

              - hey

     The first reply came when John came back and climbed into bed, left unlooked at for a while in favor of scrolling instagram for a time. They showed each other things back and forth on their screens, different memes or interesting posts, things on tumblr being reblogged one way or the other in a conga line to make sure their friends saw them. Comfortable night routines that ended with John snoring with his head against Dave’s chest, his long body curled up on his side to keep his feet from dangling over the far bottom, safely out of grasp of whatever demons decided to take up residence rent free under his bed this week Dave noted.

     Hey. After finding out vampires were real, as well as werewolves, the boogeyman and shit hiding under his bed would just be another square on the bingo sheet his life had recently become. Can you blame a guy for believing?

     The text was still waiting for him when Dave slid the screen over quietly to peek.

             - Hey. Finally get curious?

             - i don’t know you tell me

             - Are you wanting information, or to be antagonized?

             - oh wow i get a choice

             - The gist of it will be the same either way: you’re a liability. If you were anything but human, you’d be more useful than you are to your fangy boytoy.

     Dave didn’t know what he expected. The bluntness was something he could appreciate at least, instead of being babied or sweet talked. It was quick, to the point, and fairly brutal.

             - ive heard as much already 

             - you got any new info for me or can i delete your number now

             - I’ve got new information in the form of an offer, if that piques your interest.

             - offer

             - like what

             - Like the offer to help you be something more than human.

             - You seem like a nice guy, Dave. I’ve got nothing against you. This beef is Jake and John’s business, not mine particularly. 

             - All it’d take is a good infection bite, and you’d be able to be like me. Consider how useful that’d be for your partner in the scheme of things.

             - Wouldn’t you like him to be as prepared as possible, stand as good a chance as he can in this pissing contest?

     Dave frowned at his phone and glanced briefly towards John’s sleeping face before typing quickly.

             - bullshit i already know thats a lie

             - im on the up and up man

             - a bite from you would just make me a feral piece of shit not whatever you are

             - Ah, damn. Should have acted sooner than I did.

             - werent you literally just saying you had nothing against me and then you pull this shit???

             - Having you trust me would have made a lot of things easier. Namely it could have also gone a long way in making sure Jake kept you alive instead of disposing of you when the time came to get John’s food source away from him.

              - bad dog go to the yard and think about what you did

     Dave muttered to himself as he blocked Dirk’s number, hurriedly switching back over to Instagram when he felt John shifting against his shoulder. Sleepily, he cracked his blue eyes open and looked Dave over a few times, squinting against the brightness from the screen.

     “Mmn… Why’re you still up…?”

     “It hasn’t been that long since you went to sleep,” Dave said, kissing John’s forehead automatically before even thinking the action through. Felt natural, felt right, fuck it. “Go back to sleep, I’ll pass out when I can.”

     That was apt. There was a lot to digest now. He’d need to put his foot down on any future visits from Dirk, maybe alert his manager that the new regular customer was actually stalking him, avoid his presence. It’s not like he knew his entire schedule, right? He just… kept turning up on the days he was working, at the right times, like clockwork. Somehow.

     Fuck, maybe this was bad. Maybe he should tell John after all.

     Yet the idea of waking him up now seemed entirely out of the question, not now that he was cuddling up again and closing his eyes, warm and pliant and relaxed. This was the kind of bomb someone dropped when they were dealing with a fully conscious person, not late night “Oh, by the way” conversation.

     Sighing, Dave scrolled a while longer before setting his phone aside and rubbing the bridge of his nose, fending off a late night headache. Too much thinking… One more glance to John, already unconscious again and drooling on his shoulder, and he finally settled down to sleep as well.

 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

      When he woke up the next morning it was to John leaving his entire arm tingling like the static on a television set and an ache in his head from thinking too long into the night. Even his dreams had been stressful, and looking at a bright screen so late at night in the dark certainly hadn’t helped things settle down at all in his mind. Really, he just wanted to forget it ever happened, chalk it up as a shit experience, and deal with it later.

     First, he needed to rescue his arm.

     “John. John. John. Earth to sack of potatoes currently cuttin’ off all the blood to my fingers to the point I can’t flip you off properly, can you maybe roll your fangy ass over and gimme some breathin’ room.”

     Nothing but soft snoring.

     Grunting, Dave struggled and finally yanked his arm out from underneath John’s weight, and sat up to rub his arm from fingertip to shoulder till the stinging went away and the blood flow returned to normal. He unplugged his phone from the charger and took it with him to the bathroom, scrolling out of habit and checking his emails, continuing to do so once he’d finished and washed up. Breakfast would be his treat today, and that meant something simple but tasty. He got out eggs and had just started to fry them and some breakfast hash up when John finally made his way out of the bedroom with bleary eyes behind his glasses. The vampire sniffed, stretched, and went to take a seat at the table before splaying out over the top like a sunning seal.

     “Good mornin’ to you too,” Dave said.

     “Mmmmorning,” John yawned. “Man I slept deep last night… did you finally get to bed at a good time?”

     “Eh. Tried but it was kinda hit or miss,” he said, flipping the eggs over so the tops would cook just a little bit. Sealed and perfectly over medium, nary a runny white to be seen, Dave slid the first two eggs and some of the breakfast hash onto a plate for John with some toast. He cracked two more eggs onto the skillet before delivering the dish, rubbing John’s upper back idly. “Woke up to you deadarmin’ me though. That was fun.”

     “Ah, fuck, my bad. Thanks,” John said, realizing silverware was needed. He stood up to go get two sets, leaving one opposite of where he sat for when Dave’s food was done. “So what’s the plan for the day? You’ve got work?”

     “A few hours, yeah, but not a long shift. And it’s not till later,” Dave said.

     Things were calm, peaceful. John was awake and calm. Maybe he could just-

     “...So. Dirk came to where I was workin’.”

     John choked on a piece of hash before swallowing and dropping his fork on the plate, planting his hands on the tabletop as if he were about to stand up and… what. Fight? “What? When? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

     “A few times,” Dave said, pointedly ignoring the incredulous look John was flashing his direction in favor of trying to distinguish every last flavor in the hash. Hm. Bit too salty but it worked fine with the eggs. “Nothin’ happened though.”

     “STILL! Why didn’t you let me know, this is dangerous shit Dave! Did he say anything? Do anything weird?” John fret, mind racing a mile a minute, already trying to come up with what the fuck to do next if any number of things had happened. Dave LOOKED okay but-

     “He gave me his phone number,” Dave said.

     “...What?”

     “He gave me his phone number, and we talked briefly. Don’t worry. It was bullshit. He was tryin’ to tell me I was holdin’ you back, offerin’ to “help” me. It was a crock of shit and he dropped the act when I pointed out I knew better already.”

     John relaxed a bit, but still seemed on edge as he lowered his hands back to his lap, trying not to sulk. Something that big and he hadn’t been told about it? What else was there that wasn’t being mentioned?

     “Before you ask: I already blocked him. There wasn’t anything to gain, so… cut’em loose.”

     “Nothing to gain?” John asked, confused.

     “The way he talked before, he was actin’ like nothin’ was personal. That he didn’t have any beef with me, that this was between you and Jake mostly,” Dave said, crunching toast after mopping up more egg yolk. “I thought it might be interestin’ if he was kind of doin’ his own thing aside from Jake and your issue.”

     “I’ve got no idea if that’s true or not,” John admitted. “It might be for all I know, I don’t know how close they keep their business to their relationship or how he acts as his tap aside from being one. But it’s not just a Jake and Me thing: you’re at risk too now, remember?”

     “How could I forget. When’s the asshole gonna leave town already.”

     “When he gets bored of antagonizing us and being a dick,” John grumbled, slowly going back to eating.

     “Maybe Christmas’ll come early. I’m gonna go take a shower so I can be a lazy piece of shit around the living room without smellin’ myself till work,” Dave said as he finished up his meal and rose to deposit the plate into the sink. 

     “You mind if I get your laptop out and play a game?”

     “Knock yourself out, you know the password,” he said, gesturing a wave of his hand without looking back as he left the room to get a change of clothes before closing the bathroom door.

     The pressure in here felt different somehow, though Dave was pretty sure he was just going crazy at this point. He’d noticed it briefly earlier, and every time he’d come into the bathroom since getting back home, how different it felt… but there was surely nothing to it. John had warded everything thoroughly, right? Maybe this was just a side effect of it being in a smaller space. Still, he looked to the window as if it would betray him before cracking it open to let the eventual steam out and turning to pull his shirt off.

     The window opened wider, and Dave froze in place, arms up over his head tangled in his shirt, face covered. He heard a step, then a second one as the window creaked under someone’s weight and then eased.

     “Dave?” John called. “Is everything okay?”

     Of course he felt it too. He’d have to be crazy to not feel the presence that now filled the bathroom. Dave had already put two and two together: John had been warding in here when he’d gotten interrupted to go open the window in the bedroom. The job hadn’t been finished. He’d interrupted and bitched and now look at what the fuck had happened.

     “You know, for a human you’ve got a pretty nice figure,” Dirk murmured from behind him. “Might want to tell him everything’s okay or things’ll get messy in here.”

     “Yeah,” Dave called. “Yeah, it’s. Yeah.”

     “Points off, not convincing,” Dirk hissed softly, but John didn’t call again so perhaps things were fine after all now.

     “What do you want,” Dave said, slowly lowering his arms but not turning around, feeling the hairs on the back of his neck rise up as he slowly looked to the side without moving his head, trying to catch a glimpse in the mirror of what was happening. He could just barely make out Dirk’s face, the dark shades he wore, the angular nose, the front of his lips. When he smirked, he could see hints of sharp teeth.

     “To give you a fair chance to get out of this,” Dirk said. “Jake’s outside right now waiting for me to take care of business… but I don’t like taking advantage of people in the bathroom of all places.”

     “Kind of you. What’s the catch,” Dave muttered.

     “You only get a head start. If I catch you… well. Let’s just say our conversation from last night won’t matter much anymore.”

     “And if you don’t catch me with your freakish speed shit?”

     “Then this round is a draw and I’ll accept my losses.”

     “And John?”

     “You assume I believe he’d let me chase you for fun with no rebuff? Please. I know what I’m doing, Dave.”

     “...How long do I have.”

     “You had thirty seconds, you’re down to about twenty five now.”

     Cussing under his breath, Dave jerked out of his frozen state and reached for the bathroom door, launching out and past a startled looking John.

     “Dave! I was jus- Where are you going!” he called out, turning to watch him run to the livingroom and fling open the door, rushing out to the hall. A shape rushed past him then, a blur to most watching, but to John he could see clearly enough to make out the stupid shades and blonde hair of someone who had no right being in this apartment. Snarling, he took off after him. “DIRK.”

     The elevator door closed before Dave could reach it, and he didn’t trust waiting for any length of time. Instead he grasped the railing and started to rush downstairs that way, jumping the last two steps with bare feet before turning the U bend and continuing to repeat the pattern floor by floor. He could hear John’s bellow from above, and could hear something uncomfortably close behind him. Daring to look up as he ran, Dave saw what could only be the blurry form of Dirk rushing down after him, two flights up.

     John dove for Dirk when he rounded a corner, dropping several stairs at once to tackle him with his full weight against the landing wall, succeeding in latching on around his neck and shoulder hard enough to gain purchase on before starting to punch towards his face with everything he had. The impact had been jarring enough that neither of them had their full wind, but something Dirk had that John didn’t was a muzzle full of sharp teeth as he started to shift in the other’s arms. His shirt fell away as his chest expanded and fur grew, arms bulking up, hands gaining claws, feet leaving his sneakers behind as they changed. A pair of ears lifted up into view, sensitive and laid back aggressively. John got a solid punch in before reeling back and releasing his hold, startled, not wanting his hand mauled by the beast who was rapidly bending its bones into a new position with soft pops and creaks.

     Dirk snarled at him and bared his large teeth once before perking an ear up and jerking away from the vampire to look down the stairwell. Several flights down, Dave was looking up, checking for where the enemy was. He could see the color drain from his face as he jumped the barrier and leapt down with lifted arms, catching onto the rung of a nearer floor before hefting himself over. John, unwilling or unable to risk doing the same, was stuck scrambling down the stairs anew in as many flashes as he dared, shouting for Dave to keep running as fast as he could.

     Didn’t need to tell him twice. The blonde was nearing the ground floor on shaking legs and veered for the front exit, not even knowing where he’d go next. Go in circles around the building until John got done zipping downstairs? He knew he could go fast, but that had been on fairly even ground before, not on stairs. Dave knew he himself could go ridiculously fast when pressed, that had to account for something, right? Maybe he had regrets about not joining track in some other life, but this would surely make up for any lingering thoughts. He raced for the front door and threw it open, almost running face first into someone.

     “Fuck, I’m sorry, I jus-”

     “No worries, chap. I take it John’s in there still, hm?”

     Dave could feel his stomach drop when he heard John’s name. The man in front of him looked… well. He looked a great deal like John, actually. Messy black hair and tan skin, broad shoulders and long arms ending in sturdy looking fingers. His eyes were wicked green and he wore an amused expression on his youthful face, one that brought unease to Dave all anew. He took a step back, then another, peering over his shoulder to see what his options were.

     Shit was what they were. Dirk, or the pale beast he assumed Dirk was, was coming towards him with John hot on his heels. It was obvious the vampire hadn’t seen who was in front of Dirk, the beast larger than its human counterpart and hurriedly barreling along, as nobody was slowing down. Thinking fast, Dave turned and ran towards Dirk as fast as he could before dropping to his knees and ducking down when he lunged.

     The wad of werewolf and vampire hit the opening of the door at an angle, Dirk rebounding to hurry along after Dave again on all fours, while John was stuck flat on his ass in front of Jake.

     No. No time. No time, had to get Dave away from the infectious one. Could he fend off two people at the same time? Had to get back into the apartment. No, the apartment wasn’t safe anymore, how had they gotten in!

     “DAVE! DAVE GET THE KEYS! THE KEYS!” he yelled, giving Jake another look before getting up to follo-

     “Ah ah ah, where do you think you’re going cousin! We finally meet up and you don’t even say hello, how rude! I’ll have to get on your father about teaching you some MANNERS,” Jake said, having caught John by the back of the shirt before yanking him back as hard as he could. Choked into obedience, John turned, preparing to fi-

     Preparing to get hit in the nose with enough pressure he was pretty sure he heard a cracking noise. Another hit, this one to the chest, forced him back into the building at an unsteady pace. A third punch, aimed for the side of his face, was finally blocked, giving John enough time to zip back away from Jake with a hiss. He could only pray Dave was getting the keys, that he was safe, that he was faster than Dirk. Going downstairs was one thing, but going up could be exhausting.

     Dave was halfway back to the apartment and his chest and legs felt like they were full of fire, yet he didn’t dare stop. Stopping now felt like a death sentence, especially with Jake around and James’ convincing play acting before. Would getting the keys even help at this point? He knew where they were, hung on the table beside the door where John always dropped them, ready to go and ready to not get lost. It was just a matter of avoiding every single thing downstairs. He heard vicious breathing below him, barely there visible cues of where Dirk was, and Dave pushed himself faster than he’d gone before.

     The door was just ahead.

     Lunging, he grabbed the keys, and slammed the door behind himself, hearing something heavy slam into the wood, nearly buckling it. The ward held, but for how long? How long would it take him to just go to the bathroom window again? Would he leave at all? Would he just be trapped inside, waiting for John to hopefully be able to get back upstairs?

     Hyped up on adrenaline and smelling a nosebleed coming on, Dave stared at the door like he was staring down destiny. The dive had worked before, maybe it could work again. Another battering ram lunge at the door and he dared to peek out the peephole, watching Dirk size up his target for another try.

     Just needed to time it.

     Needed to time it.

     Dave picked a song out of thin air and let it play in the back of his head, a quick tempo and heavy beat to match his thundering heart. 3. 2. 1.

     When Dirk lunged, Dave threw open the door and dove face first for the were’s feet, trading places with him before trying to catch the top of the stairs. He fell, ass over teakettle, till he hit the bottom before getting up and running. He heard scratching and thudding catching up with him, but there was only so much he could do. He had the keys. He had to get to the bottom of the stairs.

     He was so tired.

     He was only human.

     Good and fast as he was, he was still only human.

     With a bark like a demon, Dirk caught up with Dave around a corner, snapping near his shoulder and startling him. A misplaced step of a tired leg, a hard shift in balance, a fall, and Dave rolled down the stairs once more. Less prepared this time, the landing was hard on his side and arms at the bottom of the current staircase, making him grunt as he tried to get up, death grip still on the keys.

     Dirk was on him in an instant, huge hands shoving Dave down and pinning him by the upper arms so he could loom over him. His lips curled back to expose sharp fangs, long and dangerous.

     “It’s nothing personal,” Dirk rumbled. 

     Despite his struggling and kicking, the teeth sinking into the section of his shoulder where it connected to his neck hurt unlike anything Dave had experienced before. It was close to the sensitive space John fed from, a place that Dave had found himself starting to be tender towards even during cuddling, and now it felt like it was being ripped apart. He could smell blood, and down below a few floors he could hear yelling. When Dirk lifted his red tipped teeth away from him, Dave felt cold in the center of his chest, chilled despite the warmth at his neck.

     “You’re just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

      John, waylaid by Jake, was having a hell of a time trying to keep up with him. It was like a boxing match, something he wasn’t prepared for, and when it wasn’t up close punches being thrown, it was bites being exchanged or intimidating circling.

     Jake moved faster. He hit harder. Every time John threw a punch Jake knew how to dodge and return volley or cross punch him, undoing any bit of progress John felt he’d made. They both bore bite marks, tears in the flesh, but John was the one far worse for wear. He could feel it in his face and the swell of his eye, the way his glasses sat skewed on his face, the way his ears rang when he breathed and his nose whistled.

     It all changed when he smelled Dave’s blood, however.

     “DAVE?” he shouted, opening himself up for one more punch to the face.

     It had to be Dave’s blood, he knew it too keenly now. And the only way to smell blood was if he was hurt, or worse-

     “DAVE!” John shouted again, focusing on Jake and squinting, darting back to avoid a hit to the stomach before throwing a right hook with all he had, connecting square into Jake’s face hard enough to send his glasses flying and stagger him a few paces back.

     “Dave, hold on! I’m coming!” he shouted. Fucking daytime, of course most of the neighbors were at work, and the ones who weren’t probably were just waiting for the crazy shit to stop happening outside in the echoing stairwell. As if they had any idea of just how much crazy shit was happening in reality.

     Dirk was already off of Dave by the time he made it to the correct flight, having fled further upstairs to collect his shoes and make his way out the window the way he’d come. The apartment door clunked shut ominously out of range, but John couldn’t think about that, couldn’t remember Jake down below who might be following him at this very moment. All he could focus on was the smell of blood, the ripped shirt, the bruises. The fact he looked terrified, curled up in the corner of the stairwell with his hands around his own neck, just made his blood boil all the more.

     He’d pay for this. They both would, both of them would pay for what they’d done today and John was going to make goddamn sure of it.

     “John,” Dave finally croaked. “...John, he bit me.”

     It took a second to register what Dave said, what he meant, but when it caught up in John’s mind it made his legs go slack and sent him down to his knees.

     “It. ….No. no, no, no he didn’t,” he insisted, “let me see. He didn’t bite you, he couldn’t have, it-”

     “He bit me,” Dave groaned again, slowly lowering his hands to reveal where the blood smell was coming from. It was on his hands, on the edges of his ripped shirt, all stemming from a terrible looking bite wound.

     John’s baser instincts were warring with themselves, half fascinated by the scent and the sight, wanting to sample it, wanting to drink him dry. The other half was enraged that someone had harmed his tap, and wanted to get revenge right that second.

     “Shh…. Shhh it’s gonna be okay,” was all he could think to say. As for what to do… he spotted the keys by Dave’s feet and scooped them up before carefully picking Dave up as well. “We’re going to my Dad’s house.”

     Maybe he’d have some kind of answers, some kind of hope that this wasn’t as bad as it looked. He walked upstairs and opened the apartment, finding it empty. A quick trip to the bathroom and John sat Dave down on the toilet seat, wetting a washcloth and handing it to him while he focused on closing and warding the window thoroughly. He pointedly avoided looking in the mirror till he absolutely had to, and even then it was only to wash up and straighten things as well as he could. They bandaged Dave’s neck and got him in a clean shirt, grabbing a few things in a bag for the trip.

     The tension was gone when they locked up and left the apartment again, Dave on John’s back with one arm holding the bag over John’s front and the other holding on around his neck. Jake was nowhere to be seen, Dirk was gone, everything was peace and quiet again as if their entire life hadn’t just been upended. They made it downstairs safely, ignoring the specks of blood from the fight with Jake at the entryway that he hoped someone would be able to take care of soon, and out to the car before John pulled his phone out and dialed the familiar number of his childhood.

     “Dad?” John said when the warm voice answered. “...We’re coming home.”

[miraculousmidnightreviews]

The Trials of Apollo #3: The Burning Maze Book Review

By Rick Riordan

5/5 stars

Summary: After waking up as a mere mortal, Apollo must navigate Zeus’ punishment as he and his demigod companion/master Meg travel to San Francisco to rescue a third oracle from the clutches of yet another Roman emperor that is not quite dead. With the help of some familiar faces and friendly nature spirits, Apollo continues to understand the hardships of the demigods and must learn the stakes are much higher than the loss of his seat on Olympus.

Apollo’s Character Development

In the previous books of the Trials of Apollo series, Apollo’s character was more of a means to an end for me. He provided a good laugh, but he wasn’t a hero. Not in the way that I was used to at least. Going into the series, I expected a Percy Jackson type or even Percy himself. Does anyone else have that problem? In every series written by Riordan, whether Greek mythology or other, I always want Percy to jump in and save the day. I live and breathe Percy Jackson, and I would totally be okay if every book just turned into another PJO novel. But alas, that cannot be.

Back to Apollo though: In fight scenes, he normally doesn’t get in on the action until the final blow must be struck or until he remembers something helpful from his years as a god. In that way, he’s sort of a looking glass for the reader; he sees and interacts with characters I care more about. It wasn’t until this book did I finally find a connection to Apollo. It takes some work and certain demigods to bring his pompous ass back to the mortal realm but it happens. Because of this shift in him, The Burning Maze becomes more than just another journey to secure another oracle. I foresee the book as a turning point in the series, one that Riordan can never go back from.

Plot Structure

Rick Riordan has a unique way of structuring his books that has become apparent to me over the years. A classic Riordan book normally includes a beginning chapter that plants the reader right in the middle of the action (and this books does not lack that) along with a few chapters to decompress, all the while learning new information that may aid the main characters in their journeys, a sprinkle of character development, and maybe a hint of a good ole plot twist. The pattern continues like this: a few chapters where action-packed battle scenes filled with heroism entice the reader, and then, as the fighting winds down, a few chapters follow as the characters gather to strategize, impart some wisdom and whatnot as the sequence replays once again. 

 As I’ve grown older, I’ve found it harder to remain focused while reading Riordan’s novels, which is a given considering they’re aimed at a middle grade audience. However, The Burning Maze was a delightful surprise in regards to my attention span. I couldn’t seem to put it down despite how hard I tried. Yes, it may be cliché to say that, but there is some truth in clichés. Riordan’s new novel followed, well, a plot that wasn’t predictable at all in terms of structure. The storyline felt more nuanced as not one but two major conflicts drove the characters forward. The chapters didn’t lead up to an epic Riordan-esque final battle. Without spoiling, the plot for me hastened towards two pivotal moments, each a hundred pages apart. One was completely expected and one was not.

The Side Characters! (minor spoilers in this section)

First of all, I never really cared about Meg, but this book really changed my perception of both her and Apollo. They make a strange duo, and yet it somehow works. As Meg and Apollo search for the third oracle, they find a group of nature spirits that need their help and are somehow connected to their quest. The interactions between Meg and these nature spirits as well as revelations about her past turn a once prickly character into someone more tolerable, even enjoyable. The care that both Meg and Apollo have towards each other along with their funny banter really makes their relationship more relatable.

As soon as I read the end of the preceding book, I couldn’t wait to see what our good friend Grover had been up to since the original PJO series. His role as a guide brought back some major feels, especially as he helped the mains navigate the Labyrinth. I enjoyed reading about this character again, and I’m glad he wasn’t anything more than their guide. Riordan perfectly balanced his role and appearances in the book.

Piper has grown so much as a character, and it’s really noticeable in this book. What’s interesting about The Trials of Apollo is that the series shows us characters we know and love through the perspective of a fresh face. Seeing Piper take on more responsibility and aid Apollo on a quest instead of being the demigod on the quest was extremely different but quite enjoyable. It was such a bittersweet moment for me to read about her again. For those who might have found her annoying in the HoO series, I think you may like her better as a side character. Apollo somewhat idolizes everyone because they are more capable than him and that makes them more admirable. 

WOW, Piper and Jason?! Two mains from previous books in more than just a few scenes? I am truly living life here. Thanks Uncle Rick. I’ll be honest, I never liked Jason Grace. At one point, I truly despised him. He annoyed me. But now that he’s not constantly pitted against my fav Percy, I have developed a newfound respect and fondness for his character. Once again, it’s truly amazing to see these characters from my childhood grow up. They’re figuring out their lives and going to school. It made my eyes water a little at the bittersweetness of it all. 

I don’t want to spoil too much but Coach, Mellie, and their kid are adorable. That is all.

Thanks for reading! We hoped you enjoyed our non-spoilery review! Come back later for the spoilery stuff, or keep reading at your own risk! Check out our other reviews here.

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

The Death of Jason Grace

Jason dies wtf

nothing else matters

JASON GRACE IS FUCKING DEAD

HOW CAN MY CHILDHOOD BE RUINED LIKE THIS?!

LIKE WHAT i am still shooketh how can this possible be?!

Okay I avoided writing this review for a few weeks because of Jason Grace. It honestly shocked me. At first, I didn’t know how to react. I cried a little. My childhood character, despite my past hatred for him, had been killed. Then I was furious. How could Rick Riordan do this to me? To the fandom? All we want is for our precious babies to be happy. THEY DESERVE TO BE HAPPY! And yet a hero never gets what he deserves.

After reflecting on it, I now understand the necessity of Jason’s death. Before this book, I didn’t really take this series seriously, and gurl, was that a big mistake. After reading The Hidden Oracle, I considered Apollo’s adventures as a joyride down memory lane. Oh look, over there, is that Percy in Camp Half-Blood? Leo and Calypso riding Festus? Piper and Jason living in San Fran? I loved it. The nostalgia was overwhelming and I couldn’t read them fast enough. But that soon ended with the murder of both Jason Grace and my soul. Now, the stakes are raised and I’ve learned from my mistakes. Riordan knows how to draw in the readers. I should have seen this coming, and yet, like that unforgettable drop into Tartarus, these characters and I will never be the same.

Another thing about Jason’s death: it really hurt. I just needed to reiterate that I felt physical pain in my chest while reading that scene, almost like I was the one being impaled instead of Jason. And to make it worse, Caligula didn’t just impale Jason and then leave. Oh no, Rick just had to make Caligula stab him again for good measure. Rub in the finality of his death with each jab of his golden spear. Jason was the perfect hero to die and that made everything a hundred times worse. He followed the rules. He was truly good. Which made it all the more heartbreaking when his adherence to the rules wasn’t enough to save his life.

ANOTHER thing: the fuck you mean Piper and Jason broke up? Yeah, not everyone can be Percabeth but really? I found myself shipping them more while they were separated than when they were actually dating. Damn, this book was pretty good. And Piper never had a final goodbye? AND LEO?! HE LITERALLY FLEW TO MEET THEM ONLY TO FIND JASON DEAD? I had to reread some of HoO because of this terrible nostalgia, and it just made me think: was that the last time they were all together? During the battle against Gaea? And now that will be the very last time, because Jason Grace is dead. And like I said before, there’s just no going back.

Thanks for reading! We hoped you enjoyed both our non-spoilery and spoilery reviews! Check out our other reviews here!

—Alexa

[snkpolls]

SnK S3E04 Poll Results (Anime Only Version)

The poll closed with 106 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note this is the anime only viewer version of the poll. Manga readers, please click here for the results of the manga reader poll!

Rate the episode

100% of respondents enjoyed the episode, with no negative reviews to be found! 

Did you notice the subtle changes made to the animation in the OP this week?

Only 15% of respondents immediately noticed the changes. The remaining voters either didn’t notice until it was pointed out to them/they watched again, or just had no idea there were changes at all. 

Which of the following scenes were your favorites?

The top moment was Levi and Mikasa hearing Kenny’s last name. But Hange and Moblit kicking ass, Jean testing Marlowe and Hitch and Spider-Hange were all close runner-ups!

Hange punching that one dude lol

Hitch slapped Jean with that stick like her husband was in danger. Wait...

Who made the best face when ambushing the MP base?

Connie is the clear winner here with almost no contest. Although Sasha got a pretty decent chunk of the votes as well!

How bangable was Levi this episode on a scale of 1-5?

Over half of voters would probably let Levi step on them if he wanted to. A good 22% will take a hard pass on that, however. 

K in all honesty my inner ace has to say I wouldn't bang Levi, I just admire the goddamn gorgeous aesthetic of him beating the living shit out of said ass hole--what a time to be alive

On a scale of 1-5, how distressed were you to see Erwin beat up and chained?

The vast majority of voters are anxious for Erwin to get out of his predicament and cleaned up!

How about that Levi/Mikasa teamwork?

More than half of voters were excited to see Levi and Mikasa finally working in unison. Hang tight for the ride you guys! 

Did Flegel Reeves leave an impression on you?

Flegel greatly exceeded watchers’ expectations in this episode! Some of you are hoping to get even more of him moving forward. 

Lame guy, doesn't deserve any more screen time

No, but I understand his significance

How do you feel about Levi torturing another MP for information?

A quarter of you were ready to take your pants off, but the majority of voters were just happy to see the ugly MP have his teeth knocked in.

He is just doing it to get the information as quickly as possible. They don't have much time. They are also being hunted by the MP, so I can't really say I feel sorry for the guy.

The more the merrier. They're evil anyway.

cant be helped

I adore how Levi defends flat assed commander's honour!

How did you feel about Hitch’s emotional response to Stohess/Annie’s disappearance?

The overwhelming majority were happy to see that Hitch really does have a caring bone (or rather, quite a lot of them) in her body. A few, however, weren’t impressed. 

Annie, Hitch and Marlo are (or more like were) in a perfectly balanced relationship. Of course Hitch cared! And look how distressed Marlo is! One of his girls went missing :(

It was nice to see that she admitted to others that she cared about Annie in the first place

So that's why manga readers like spoiling us so much

How cool was Hange and Moblit swooping in to knock out the MP’s?

Voters were hyped to see Hange and Moblit kicking some MP ass this week! 

Moblit is as awesome as hanji damn !!!!

How do you think Erwin’s trial is going to go?

The vast majority of voters believe that there will be a twist during the trial. 17% are sure things will be great, while 10% of voters aren’t so optimistic.

Erwin always has a plan, even if it comes into place at the very last second

His smile in the preview is too beautiful for me! Don't take him away!

He will drown Fritz in his eyebrows, Historia will be crowned and everyone can gather around an Eren Barbecue. Happy End.

Probably sentenced to death but hanged in public later, as MP said

Where do you primarily discuss the series?

Additional thoughts on the episode?

Erwin's hot af even when he's been beaten up. I'm really enjoying the 104th squad bonding being "criminals" and all. I think Levi is a good leader and Erwin is merciful to warn Nile that the royal government is going down! I'm excited to see more Erwin and 104th. Also my love for Hanji and Moblit is growing.

My favourite episode so far.

Glad to see awesome animation not just when Levi is fighting.

It will be nice to see Nile's balls drop for once in his life. Or maybe they won't.

We are four episodes in and Fritz still didn't move an inch.

Ok but where are Best Girl and Angry Plot Device ?

Goddammit Mikasa is so pretty

Where the FUCK is Eren?

Thanks to everyone who participated! We’ll see you again on Monday! 

[ellanainthetardis]

Summer Books Reviews

I’ve said I’d do a book review for the Grisha verse and then I remembered I also said I’d try to do more book reviews because of reasons (like the fact I had a book blog once upon a time, you know) so I thought I’d do a pot pourri of my summer readings.

I’m actually happy because I read a lot this summer. I think I managed a book a week give or take, without taking into account the  various comics (I’ve read all the Buffy comics I could find, sue me, I am in a PHASE). So without further ado, here are my summer reads with a short review that may or may not be spoilerish.

The Night Circus – Erin Morgensten: I think I talked about this one already actually. I gave it a 5/5 on goodreads even though it took me a while to really get into it. It’s very very slow paced and although I liked the characters, I think it’s one of those books you either love or hate. The atmosphere is everything, it’s really awesome because the circus itself is like a character of sort. I loved the two main characters – I loved all the characters actually and I loved how the ending tied back to the beginning as well as the whole meta-reflection about storytelling and stories in general. I think it’s definitely not for everyone but it’s really worth a go.

The Stolen Throne (Dragon Age #1) – David Gaider: I gave it 4/5 on Goodreads. Well it’s no secret by now that I love fantasy and video games and that Dragon Age might be my most favorite franchise. Hell, how many times did I play the whole series by now? I think I’m at three Wardens, Two Hawkes, and at least 4 or 5 inquisitors. This first novel takes place decades before Origins and it was nice to have some more context than just the codex you find on the games. I think the story works very well without further knowledge of the games and everything and it was a nice little fantasy story. I adore Loghain, you have to understand and what I loved about the love triangle (and you won’t hear me say I love a love triangle often so enjoy) is that… They all could be together. I mean, I’m not really into OT3 but for the three of them I’d do an exception.

The Mercy Thompson Series – Patricia Briggs: I re-read the whole series which took me I think more or less the whole July month since there are ten books. I can tell you I give this serie a definite 5/5. It had been so long since I read it and I hadn’t finished it so I thought why not? If you love urban fantasy (modern world with vampires, werewolves, witches and the likes) this series is for you. I just love Mercy. I love the way the author handles sexual trauma as well as trauma in general. I mean, often it’s trashy and written for shock value ( I’m looking at you Career of Evil) and here it’s just… very well handled. It doesn’t fade in the background after a book, it’s something Mercy has to deal with recurrently, it’s just a master lesson in how to write trauma. BUT those books are also full of fun, love and family. I love all the characters in there and I plan on reading the spin off series very soon.

Opal (The Raven Cycle 4.5) – Maggie Stiefvater: Ok it’s a novella but it still counts. I gave it 2/5 and nobody is more disappointed than me by this rating given how much I loved the Raven Cycle (go read if you haven’t seriously). It just… Didn’t click for me. The point of view was very limited, it was hard to relate and it left too many stuff unexplored. But I guess it’s just a way to link TRC with the next series and I’m still very much hyped for what comes next whenever it comes.

Ready Player One – Ernest Cline: ah, that one. I slaved through it. I gave it a 1/5 but really I think it would be more of a 0.5/5. To me, it’s one of those rare rare times when you can say the movie was better than the book. What was even this book? I hated it. This book is an enabler. I say this being an introvert who has problems with social situation and who love video games, considers herself a geek and proud to be and had grown up in the 90s. This book is an enabler. It gives far too much excuses and never quite set out a clear morale. And it was boring. Really, I was surprised by the movie. I liked it a lot more than I expected it too – probably because it was very little like the book.

Fairest Of Them All: A Tale of The Wicked Queen – Serena Valentino: Another one I was disappointed it. I had a strike unfortunately. I gave it 1/5. It was all very… shallow. I wished for more depth and characterization but it was all very confused and confusing. I have little more to say about this one because I honestly don’t even remember. It was that unremarkable. I know I’ve read better fanfictions.

The Infinite Sea/The Last Star (The 5th Wave #2 and #3) – Rick Yancey: I’ve read those two back to back because I knew after The Infinite Sea I would never read the last one if I waited. I gave 2/5 to The Infinite Sea and 3/5 to The Last Star. I was so pumped by the 5th Wave. I remember reading it what… Two years ago? And I loved it. It was fresh and interesting, lots of plot twists… First thing I didn’t like about both books were the shifting povs. Some pov are first person (like Cassie’s, the main character) and some are third person. And that’s just plain weird. I know I have a problem with pov, I usually don’t like first person pov much but re-reading Mercy Thompson helped me get back on that horse. But if you constantly shift from I to he/she, it gets annoying really fast. The second book is mostly full of length and doesn’t have much happening except for Ringer (but I will come back to Ringer) and the third one was… confusing. Ok maybe I’m very dumb but I didn’t get it. Were they really aliens, was it all a plot, who were the real villains… I didn’t get it. The only positive point of both books was: RINGER. She’s the best character ever and she’s the only reason I slaved through those two books. She’s an ass kicking bad ass with a tactical mind to rival all and although the love story with Ben and the spoilerish thing I won’t talk about but let me say REALLY could have been maybe introduced a little better and would have deserved some more depth, I really really loved her arc. I saw a people say the ending was cliché and I might have thought so too but I think if the writing had been consistent and a little better, it might have been emotional despite the cliché.

The Secret Wife – Gill Paul: I gave it 1/5 I’m not even going to talk about it because I skimmed through the last of the book because it was SO bad I couldn’t keep reading. The premise looked soooo good, I usually love the dual present/past story and the Romanov aspect made me very interested but it was badly written and boring and simply meh.

Shadow & Bones / Siege & Storm / Ruin & Rising (The Grisha #1, #2, #3) – Leigh Bardugo: We’re here at last. OMG. Did I love this trilogy (with it’s many linking novellas?) YOU BET. I gave them all 5/5. Let me tell you something, this is MY JAM. I loved Alina Starkov. I LOVED her. She’s so relatable. All the cast of characters is amazing. The writing is just as amazing and I think it’s safe to say I will read anything by this author because I trust her completely. If you love fantasy, young adult and a good villain, this is the story for you. I didn’t like the main ship I won’t lie. I would have loved a good redemption final twist and the love interest was a little too bland compared to the villain and the King but… It didn’t spoil my enjoyment at all. I’m so HYPED on this verse right now.

The Obsession – Nora Roberts: I’m a big fan of Nora, I’ve read a lot of her books and I was a bit disappointed in this one. I gave it a 2/5. The story is okay and it’s nice to read. I mean, it reads easily, it doesn’t as for a lot of reflection. It’s a good story all in all and I would have put it a 3 or a 4 if not for something that has been jumping at me for the last couple of her books I read. I’m not one to jump up and down and scream misogyny at every turn but there’s a certain idea of a woman in her books that is starting to make me a bit… meh. Let me be clear. The male lead is cliché as can be, full of testosterone, riding a bike, a mechanic, a dog lover with a sensitive side because of course he loves books and while the female promised to be extremely strong and independent career woman, it’s not long before we fall into the a happy woman = a husband, a dog and a kid cliché. And that bothered me.

Six Of Crows (Six of Crows #1) – Leigh Bardugo: Ok there was such a hype around this one I was a little disappointed when I read it. I’m not much into incredible heist stories and to be fair, I read it right after I saw Ocean’s 8 (which was awesome) and it suffered from the (unfair and unconscious) comparison. I gave it a 2/5 BUT this being said I just loved the characters. I was already one hundred percent on board the Kaz/Inej train (didn’t you hear me shout as I passed by?) and the Jesper/Wylan one. Matthias and Nina both left me a little indifferent I will admit and I had troubles with so many povs crammed in one book. It was  lot of information everywhere and from every angle. I’m still happy I read it, do you know why? I will tell you. First I love the Grisha universe and it takes place in the same world a few years after and then: CROOKED KINGDOM BABY.

The Lies They Tell – French Gillian : I gave this one a 3/5. It’s a little detective story that reads very easily. It’s nothing exceptional but it will give you a good time.

Kindred Spirits – Rainbow Rowell: I have a problem with short stories/novellas. Always had. it always leaves me wanting more and that was my problem with my book. The moment I got into it, it ended so I gave it a 2/5 but it was really cool nonetheless. Would have liked to read more.

Crooked Kingdom (Six Of Crows #2) – Leigh Bardugo: OMG OMG OMG OMG. Ok, needless to say I gave this one a 5/5. I finished it yesterday so I’m still very much having FEELS. Maybe I wasn’t that much in Six of Crows but this book makes the read worth it, I promise. THIS IS JUST AMAZING. THE FEELS. FEELS EVERYWHERE. Kaz and Inej and their perfect love. Matthias… Nina and her addiction… Jesper and Wylan being cutiepies. I cried at the end. Do you know how often I cry reading books? very much not often. What I mean is: READ IT. READ THE WHOLE GRISHA VERSE. DO IT. DO IT. YOU NEED TO MEET DIRTHANDS AND HIS WRAITH. YOU NEED TO. THIS BOOKS IS PERFECT. IT WILL GIVE YOU FEELS. IT WILL GIVE YOU LIFE.