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megaawkwardhuman · 2 years ago

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finally explaining the bunny thing!

ok I'm currently really board and stumbled upon an old sketch book and I've decided hey let's FINALLY explain why tf I draw wwdits characters as bunnies (cuz I know it's random as shit and I personally find the story behind my bunny art intresting)

so strap in cuz I'm going to write a lot for something I could probably sum up in two sentences

also small heads up a lot of drawn cartoon violence and blood ahead sooooooo :|

if you just want a short answer I draw these goofy looking bunnies cuz 1 it's fun 2 it's kinda a way to release stress and just a way to overall put myself in a better mood. at first I was drawing the same bunny getting kill/injured over and over again and now I draw characters I like as cute bunnies cuz it cheers me up and it's fun!

ok so I know that last part came out of nowhere but to explain a bit of how tf we got from point a to point b that let's go to the long answer

OK SO (wow I say ok so a lot sorry idk how else to start shit lol) THIS ALL STARTS SOMETIME AROUND EARLY 2022

well if you really get technical it all starts like late 2019 early 2020 when I first read a little comic called johnny the homicidal maniac then picks up in early 2022

in the comic there's a character called nail bunny which as the name kinda suggests is a dead bunny with a nail in it and I wanted to draw this character for whatever reason (I think I might have re read the comic? or I was just bored at the time idfk)

shortly after starting I gave up and instead doodled this:

why yes that was a heart and yes I did scribble all over it and stabbed it with a pencil for some reason? I kinda learned not to question past me at this point ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

so later that night I couldn't for the life of me sleep and idk why but I couldn't forget this bunny I drew so I pulled out my sketch book at the time and drew this:

(btw the little virgo simbol in the corner of some of these drawings was my signature at the time cuz it's my zodiac sign and I thought it looked neat)

and as the next day came and I talked to my friends over discord I STILL couldn't get this bunny out of my head so we gave her a name

this plush (yes despite bleeding this bunny and any bunny I draw is intended to be a plush bunny which is why I draw them with twinkies for arms and legs) bunny over here is named alexis (named after a friend who wanted the bunny to be named after her) and from that day onwards it was my goal to needlessly kill/injured her over and over in ridiculous ways

the story I created for this character to kinda justify it is that she gets killed/injured in ridiculous ways often (which is why I draw her with X eyes) cause her luck is just REALLY shitty and she just kinda accepts it all at this point ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

some of my favs from this time:

as times goes by I draw her less and less (cuz I shit you not I ran out of ideas) to the point where I kinda stopped drawing bunny art

jump to later in 2022 and after creating a pixel art shitpost which led to me learning pixel art (but that's another story for another time) I realized wait a minute I actually really like this but idfk what to draw

then I remembered alexis existed! so while chatting with a good friend of mine I asked how should I kill her this time (yes that's exactly what I asked he knew about the bunny thing tho) he said "dying peacefully in a hospital"

so like the great friend I am I decided to be a dick and drew this

this led to the creation of a new bunny character alexis's friend/roommate/idfk what they are anymore courtney!

courtney's little shory is she knows alexis, she has witnessed her die far too many times, and in later drawings she would gain the stare of a victorian child

no joke she looks like she saw her parents die of the plague

after asking the same friend what else to draw alexis doing I also created a zombie bunny but I didn't really draw them much

all of this sparked another wave of bunny art with like a few digital drawings but after a bit it went back to traditional but now with color!

some faves from this wave:

now ngl this next point is a blur but soon I would draw something that would change the course of history bunny art where bunnies AREN'T killed *gasp*

so apparently this happened earlier this year but it feels like it happened last year ngl

at this point I wasn't drawing bunnies AS much but I would doodle them every so often and for whatever reason I decided to draw stede and ed as bunnies (it might have to do with the fact that I'm not the greatest at drawing humans but idk)

and for a while it sat in a notebook with the only people I've shown it to being my irl friends

that is until the one year anniversary of this show when I decided to open up that pixel art website again and turn it into pixel art! (here's a link to the post tho I lowkey wanna redraw this since I don't like the way I drew the ears) and originally it was going to be the only bunny pixel art I was gonna do since it took a while and idk how I felt about the results

but then wwdits brainrot set in and I decided since I suck at drawing humans why not draw my boy guillermo as a bunny and the rest was history

ngl when my bunny art first for attention whenever I saw someone calling it cute in the back of my mind I would think hehehe this only exists cuz I would stop killing the same bunny over and over again

so now you know the history behind the art

yay but why?

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell

at the beginning it was just a fun little thing I did and I never gave it much thought. It wasn't until recently as I started to post it onto tumblr I ACTUALLY thought about my bunny art and to say it's just a fun thing to do doesn't really describe it as well as it used to. To me it grew to be MORE than that! it's a simple thing I could draw to mess with new mediums, it's a thing a can draw over and over again and not have to worry about how it turns out since even if I post it on here at the end of the day I'm mainly drawing it for myself, if I need to let off some steam I can draw alexis getting killed in a goofy way, and if I don't wanna draw alexis I can't just draw wwdits bunny stuff since that always cheers me up since it's hard to be upset while drawing plush bunnies (and trust me I've tried)

yeah I know this whole thing is kinda silly and honestly random as shit but this bunny art has a special place in my heart despite me only really doing it for a year

hell it's gotten to the point where I have a small list of rules I stick by whenever creating something bunny related and I have fucking bases I use whenever I'm drawing pixel art of a character as a bunny for the first time

why yes I am taking pastel bunnies far too seriously

I think the funniest thing is (and I think I've stated this before in the tags of a bunny drawing but I'll say it again) bunnies aren't even my favorite animal

that honor goes to frogs (bunnies are in the top five tho)

so this whole thing makes LESS sense if you take that into consideration but idk it's just fun

and at the end of the day that's really all I had to say but I wanted an excuse to talk about the history of this bunny bs lol

thanks for coming to another one of my TED talks and remember I swear I'm not crazy

#long ass post #bun stuff #this too WAY longer then expected #I started this at 9 and it's now 1 wtf #debated a little on whether or not to actually post this but fuck it you know?

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ageofnations · 3 years ago

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Chamomile // drw // Pt. VIII

Summary: Danny often feels overshadowed by his best friends and bandmates. You, however, can’t seem to get your mind off of him.

Paring: Danny × fem!reader

Word Count: ~3.7k

Warnings: fluff, little bit of jealous!Danny just because i felt like it...tears, talk of anxiety, slight angst but mostly fluff tho lmaoooo

A/N: i cannot begin to explain to yall how much i appreciate you all. your support on this fic has meant the world to me, and i appreciate you for sticking with me on this journey. i can't wait to show you guys what i have planned for other fics. i cried a lot while writing this. 'tis a bittersweet feeling, but an exciting beginning to new things. thank you again, and enjoy the final part of Chamomile

Series Masterpost

Part VIII

Things didn’t slow down after that night at the bar. Fans were celebrating the new album release and the tour that the boys had finally announced after weeks of hinting at through various posts. Management had been hounded by press and interviewers wanting to schedule interviews with any of the boys that they could, but especially Danny.

He seemed to relax a bit and get used to the attention after his win was announced. What used to be anxiety and skittishness from people talking about his status turned into pride with slight bashfulness. He was staying quite humble with the new title as best drummer of the year, almost frustratingly so. You would teasingly bring it up in your conversations, referring to him as “royalty” or some equivalent, and he would brush it off with a laugh each time.

His humility was appreciated, though. He didn’t let it affect him to the point where he was cocky, but it did help his confidence while playing. He didn’t let it change how he acted toward his bandmates, and he definitely didn’t let it change how he acted with you. You were still his number one priority.

He spent the majority of his time with you. If you weren’t sleeping in his bed for the night, he was sleeping in yours. He had about a month before the first tour date, and he made sure to be around you as much as possible.

Today, you were laying on the couch in the band’s home. You had your legs stretched across Danny’s lap on the cushion beside you. He was scrolling through his phone with one hand and rubbing the soft skin on your ankle with the other. Per his request, you were helping him find more outfits to wear for each of the tour dates they had planned, so you also were scrolling through various sketches and shops that you saw online. Occasionally, you would turn your phone to him to ask what he thought, to which he would either nod his head with a smirk or shrug his shoulders noncommittally.

Sam had disappeared into his room to play with a few riffs he had been working on. Jake was spending the day with his girlfriend, also trying to get as many dates in as he could before the tour started. You thought you’d get to do the same, hoping to spend alone time with Danny, even if it was to do something related to the band, but instead, Josh had joined you two in the living room, draping himself over the lounge closest to you. He also was looking at sketches for himself, and occasionally the other members, and showing them to you for your opinion. You wished you had known exactly when you became the stylist for the entire band and when you’d start getting paid for your help.

“What about this one, mama? For Daniel?” Josh said. The nickname took you by surprise, although it was not foreign for Josh to use for any one, especially you.

“Uh-” You started as you turned your head to look at the image he had zoomed in on. Before you could even focus on the vibrant sketch, Danny spoke up.

“I don’t think I like the color,” he said pointedly. He seemed to have a sort of edge to his voice, much different than just seconds prior. It was the most he had contributed to the discussion about what he did and didn’t like out of the options you both had provided him with. What further perplexed you, however, is that Josh’s sketch was the exact same color as one of the few you had shown Danny that he had said he liked.

Josh noticed the quick change in demeanor, the hints of malicious passive-aggressiveness as Danny looked away to continue aimlessly scrolling. He noticed the way he had instinctively tightened his grip on your ankles that were crossed under his hand. You, however, passed it off as the masculine urge of territorialism, something that arose from Josh’s use of the nickname and that would pass soon after it even started.

The room was filled with uncomfortable silence for the first time all day, and you wished you could find the right words to cut through the thick tension in the atmosphere. It seemed that Josh had mustered up enough courage to take on the task himself.

“You know what would be cool?” He said, almost hesitantly. You and Danny both turned your heads to him as you waited for him to continue. “You guys should wear matching outfits to the shows. Same color, same style, something. Even if the fans don’t see you, it makes for a cute picture!”

He didn’t mean to make matters worse, but the suggestion definitely didn’t help the tension.

Neither you nor Danny said anything, you just simply looked away from him and back to your phones, not fully taking in whatever was on the screens in front of you. You noticed the expression on Josh’s face drop into one of confusion and concern.

“What? What is it?”

You almost couldn’t bring yourself to speak, not wanting to rub salt in the wounds. You opened your mouth to answer, but he seemed to come to the conclusion by the time you could find the right words.

“You’re…not coming with us?”

Your heart could have shattered into millions of pieces at the disappointment you heard in his words. You felt Danny resume rubbing circles on your ankle out of reassurance and desire to help ground you.

This was an incredibly touchy subject for you. Sure you wanted to travel the world with your best friends and boyfriend. You could only imagine how fun it would be to go on tour with them. They’d be sure to include you in each of their adventures and let you see as many behind-the-scenes experiences as you could. Being able to watch Danny perform his heart out every week, with the knowledge that he was leaving the venue with his arms wrapped around you…that is what you wanted, more than anything.

But the idea of not having the comfort of your own home, or homes, to go back to any time you wanted scared you. You had grown accustomed to routine for the most part. Being in a different city, a different state, every week…it was completely different than what you were used to. It was terrifying.

Not to mention the change of status you’d have to face every time you went somewhere. You were no longer just a friend of the guys’, but now you were a girlfriend. You knew the fans would want to interact with you too now, and that seemed overwhelming to you. Having strangers come up to you and ask to take a picture almost every time you go out. Seeing your face on all of the hashtags and trending topics. Being the topic of discussion in comment sections. You had already started to get a taste of all of that after their last performance, but this would be an everyday thing. You just didn’t know if you were ready for it.

You and Danny had talked about it countless times, and he never once pressured you to come with them. But you could still hear the sadness in his answers each time. He wanted you with him. He promised he wouldn’t leave your side unless he absolutely had to, and even then, he would try to find a loophole to where you could stay near him. He knew it would be a change of pace for you, but he hoped he could be the source of comfort and familiarity for you. He made sure to listen to each of your concerns about the topic, but you couldn’t help but feel guilty for that reason alone. He was always so receptive to your worries, but it did very little to shift your decision. You wished you could change your own mind, for him.

Josh had put the pieces together before you could answer again. He picked up on the way your shoulders tensed and the way Danny had frozen in place when he asked. He could read every bit of your body language. He tried to bite back his own sadness, not wanting to make it any harder on you both.

“Well, that sucks…but we will try to visit you as much as possible!” The forced nature of his optimism was evident, but you still appreciated it nonetheless. “Any off day we have, it goes to you. We’ll fly back in between dates if we have the time. I know Daniel couldn’t stay away from you for too long.” Josh shot a playful wink to Danny, who still seemed a little out of it from the topic being brought up.

You doubted that it was a viable option for the group, but you could at least hope that you would still see them as much as he claimed.

–

A week before the guys were set to fly out to start the tour, things started setting in. You were about to be mostly alone for the majority of the year. You knew Danny would call and text as much as possible, and hopefully come back for the holidays at least, but being away from him just meant you'd have more boring nights than you wished for. With the amount of time that you were about to have to yourself, you knew you needed to find something else to occupy yourself with. You figured getting a physical job to go to on a normal basis would help. You didn’t need the money whatsoever, especially since you still planned to sell your crafts in your online shop, but you knew you would need the distraction.

Danny had tried to tell you that he could get you a job at the place his sister works, but you declined, stating that you wanted to find one on your own. You wanted the accomplishment of getting a job you found yourself, but you also figured essentially working with a replica of your boyfriend would do little to distract you from the fact that he was no longer there.

Instead of pushing the idea, he said he’d help in any way possible, opting to drive you to whatever business you wanted in order to get and complete applications. He wanted to make a day out of it, so you both decided to go to lunch and go shopping after you were finished with the job searching process.

The car ride was fun in itself, and having Danny alongside you made it seem less nerve-wracking to go into each establishment and ask if they were hiring. Every time you’d come back to the car, he’d ask how it went and listen intently to assess if he needed to do any damage control. Afterward, he’d put on your favorite songs as he cruised to the next destination.

After stopping at countless businesses, you decided it was time to call it quits for the day. Danny took you to a small diner for lunch where he ordered blueberry pancakes for the both of you because “Who said you can’t have pancakes at noon?” You two ate over small conversations about big plans for the tour before finally heading out to do some shopping.

He hadn’t been looking at much for himself the whole time you were walking through the strip mall. Honestly, neither of you were looking much. You just reveled in the time out in public with each other, hand-in-hand. The most he had gotten was a pair of sunglasses and a couple of sets of socks that he found. He had bought you a necklace and earring set that you had insisted was way too expensive, so you especially weren’t anticipating looking for anything else to buy.

That is until a beautiful white sundress caught your attention in a shop’s window. Danny picked up on your infatuation with the dress before you could even say anything. He could see it in the way your eyes widened, how your breathing hitched slightly, how you automatically started to move towards the window and drag him behind you. You didn’t bring yourself to actually enter the shop, still set on not spending any more money for the day, but you stood in front of the display in the window, ogling the bright fabric of the garment.

“You’re drooling, Bip,” Danny teased. He laughed as you instinctively raised your hand to check if his words rang true, only to find that he was exaggerating. “You should try it on, though.”

You shook your head. “No way. If I actually like it, you’re not going to let me pay for it myself.”

“And what’s wrong with that?”

You shot him a scolding glare, vacant of any malice. “You’ve spent enough money on me for the day.”

“Oh come on,” he whined and motioned for the door. “Just try it on. It’s gorgeous, and I want to see it on you.”

Embarrassingly enough, it didn’t take much more sweet-talking from him to convince you to actually go into the store, and once you were both inside, it was too late to back out. He had asked the attendant if they had your size in the dress, which she happily helped you find and open a dressing room for you.

Once you had it on, you were slightly disappointed that you had already promised yourself that you wouldn’t buy it. The dress’s flowy fabric came just past your knees. The puffy sleeves hung slightly below your shoulders and were extremely comfortable. The outfit complemented you in all of the best ways. The pure white stood out and could gain the attention of anyone while also enhancing your complexion and highlighting your natural skin tones. Hints of cleavage were visible and your figure was accentuated while still remaining mostly modest.

As you stood in front of the mirror in the dressing room, you twisted from side to side so you could admire the way the skirt fanned out around you. You couldn’t help doing a few twirls to fully get the experience. You felt beautiful, and you knew you looked good.

“You gonna keep doing 360s or am I going to get to see how the dress looks on you?” you heard Danny call from the other side of the door. You giggled before you stalled your spinning, wobbling a little from dizziness.

You knew he’d like it as much as you did, if not more, but you still felt a little nervous to show him. You paused and took a deep breath before opening the door to reveal yourself to him.

Just as yours had done when you first saw the dress on display, Danny’s eyes widened as he scanned over your body.

“Oh my god…”

You bit back a giggle at his response. You did another small twist and studied his expression with bated breath. “Well? What do you think?”

He huffed in awe. “What do I think? It looks absolutely amazing on you.” He ghosted his fingertips down your arms, still drinking in every bit of your appearance. He grabbed one of your hands and brought it over your head, twirling you around as if you were dancing together. He could have sworn that he fell even harder for you as he watched your cheeks grow a shade of peach with your giggles. “You look gorgeous, Bip.”

“Thank you, Danny,” you answered and gave him a sweet peck on the cheek. “But we’re still not getting it.”

“Whatever you say, love.”

You grinned at him, glad that he hadn’t pushed to spend more money on you, but also a little sad that you would have to take the dress off.

“Let me change before I run out of here with this thing on,” you joked, turning back to the dressing room you had originally occupied.

Danny stopped you and clutched onto your hand that he still clasped, tugging you back to face him. “Hey-”

You turned back to him, blushing at the affectionate smile he had still on his face as he looked down at you.

“-I’m gonna marry you someday,” he finished.

You almost felt speechless, but you were incredibly endeared by the statement and the moment with him. The way he looked at you like he wouldn’t get to ever again. The way his hand was holding yours so tenderly. You felt alone in the universe with him, and it took a lot of effort to remind yourself that you were in a public place.

“Why not now?” The hesitation in your response made the question come out as a near whisper. You were only halfway joking, trying to match his boldness. “I’m already in a white dress, we could do it now.”

He kissed your forehead and let go of your hand so you could return to the dressing room. “Someday.”

–

It came much too quickly. The day he would be leaving to be on the road for months on end. The day you both dreaded, but the day that you looked forward to for them. You were excited for them to continue their dream, but you wished you could have just a little longer with them. It was bittersweet.

You had driven Danny to the airport yourself, trying to soak up the last few moments you would have by his side. You didn’t say much, but he had occasionally broken the road noise by saying “I love you” as a reminder to you both. He wasn’t looking forward to this any more than you were, even if he was leaving to play for thousands of his beloved fans.

Now you stood at the airport, saying your last few goodbyes. You started with the other boys by giving all of the hugs and well wishes you possibly could. You tried to absorb each of their scents and embraces, hopeful to embody at least a portion of them all while they were away. They meandered away from you and Danny to give you some space. They talked amongst themselves as they waited for the drummer.

You stood impossibly close to him, so close that you could feel his warm and gentle breath on your face. You hadn’t let the tears fall yet, but god were they close to doing just that.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us?” He sounded slightly hopeful, even though he knew the answer he hoped for was unlikely.

You chuckled at his question. “It’s a little too late now, don’t you think?”

“We can catch a different flight. Or you could come with us now and I can just buy you a whole new wardrobe or something.” He clutched your hands tighter, praying that his offers and pleads would possibly convince you to join them.

Your pout and silence were enough of an answer to him. He knew how much you wanted to come with, and he could see the apologetic look in your eyes. He didn’t want to ruin your last few moments with his disappointment.

“Well…before I leave,” he started. He released his grip on your hands and started to dig through his carry-on bag. He pulled out a small blue gift bag, a little wrinkled and bent from being in such a compact space, and a small wrapped gift box. “I got you a few things.”

You rolled your eyes at the gesture, but you took the gifts from him with a loving smile. “You know you didn’t need to do this, right?”

“Oh just open them,” he quipped with a smile that matched yours.

You handed him the box to hold while you rummaged past the tissue paper in the bag. As soon as your hand dove into it, you knew exactly what it was. You pulled out the white sundress that you had tried on a week prior, and the tears immediately started to fall. You let out a choked sob, one that made the others briefly turn to face you to make sure you were okay.

Danny smiled and wiped the fast-flowing tears from your cheeks as much as he could. “I had already bought it before you tried it on. I ordered it and had it shipped to the house as soon as you went into that dressing room.”

The gesture was incredibly sweet, so incredibly Danny, and you were yet again reminded how blessed you were to have him. You repeated many thank yous past the overwhelming happiness that you were feeling, and he held the box back out to you. You couldn’t imagine what other gift could top this one, and you eagerly put the dress back in its bag to grab the box from him.

The paper encasing the box was thin, and you assumed it was just the same tissue paper used in the gift bag. There was a sticker of a white flower that held the tissue together. You wondered if Danny had wrapped it himself or if he had gotten help from someone else.

As you started tearing through the paper, you started to see the writing on the box, and you successfully pieced the letters and fragments together long before you had the wrapping off of it. The hot tears were back soon enough, and you noticed your lover had started crying, too.

You focused on the green print on the box and traced your finger across it.

Chamomile tea bags: 20 count

You looked up at Danny with a watery smile.

“For the times I’m not there to make it myself,” he said.

The hug was one of the last things you remembered. He held you tightly for as long as he possibly could. You both were shaking with the tears that flowed onto each other’s shoulders. He was repeatedly telling you how much he loved you and how much he was going to miss you. You had never felt so safe, so loved, and you regretted that you would have to pull away and go your separate ways.

And as you watched him walk away, you regretted not throwing out all of your inhibitions and running after him.

You didn’t know that the regretful feeling would only get worse the longer you stayed away from him.

Read Marigold to pick up from here ;)

taglist: @gretavanflowerpower @joshkiszkas @teenagesublimefan @streamsofstardust @fireandsaltydogs @gretavanflipflop @kdarling1 @greta-van-chaos @stardustingold @the-chaotic-cow @tripthelight-fanfic @gretavancreep @gretavanfleas @weightofdreamz @myownparadise96 @loofypoofy @doodle417 @gmolszewski @m1rkw00dpr1ncess @hearts-hunger @s0livagant @stardustdanny

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recurring-polynya · 4 years ago

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So I actually finally watched Memories of Nobody. I actually saw it years and years ago, in a theater, for some reason, back in 2008. I had vague memories of being disappointed by it at the time, but we actually enjoyed it on rewatch quite a bit. Some thoughts:

According to my husband, who found it on some shady streaming site, this film takes place ��between the Bount arc and the Advance Team arc” which is the 2nd most ass-pulled place to cram some filler, second only the Amagai arc, which takes place in the middle of the Hueco Mundo arc.

Ichigo spends most of the film wearing what I believe are zip-at-the-knee cargo pants, a king

Iba and Ikkaku are 🎶drinking at work🎶

Hitsugaya is so tired.

There’s a scene where Urahara explains a bunch of metaphysics while Tessai sits behind him flipping through a book of (presumably his own?) sketches, exactly like that scene in the Advance Team Arc where Renji and Rukia do this. Notably, Ichigo does not pick on Tessai’s drawing, not even once.

I guess Urahara has some way of extracting Kon’s memories and playing them, like on a tv? W H A T.

ngl the world-building in this movie kinda slaps???

I am obsessed with the fact that it’s not The Valley of Screams, it’s “a valley of screams” and it’s they make is sound like a thing that just happens (although they later back off on that and claim that there must be someone nefarious behind it)

Did I made a “what if we kissed in the valley of screams? j/k... unless...?” joke? You know I did.

There’s a scene where everyone comes to arrest Senna and it’s so ham-fisted and dumb. They sent, like, 3 captains, 2 vice-captains, some ninja, and Rukia and let Renji shout at Ichigo at the top of his lungs. Literally, all they had to do was send Rukia to say “hey, it turns out Senna is the memory crystal we should take her to Soul Society to keep her safe” and Ichigo would have been totally on board. Anyway, this is the dumbest thing that happens is movie, so let’s just move past it.

The Reigai arc sure did rip some beats off this movie

Rukia forces her way into a captains’ meeting while two guards with detaining sticks try to hold her back, this fucking rules. Yamamoto screams at her. Byakuya does not even change facial expressions.

Hey, is this, like a grifting thing? At any given time, you’ve got (1) older, distinguished Kuchiki who never reacts to anything and (1) young, feral Kuchiki who raises ruckuses? And the Kuchiki can use the hothead to start shit and cause trouble while the older one just shakes their head in vague disapproval?

Anyway, someone gave Yamamoto a kidou cannon and he is going to fire it at that valley of screams, ain’t no one gonna stop him now.

It is explicitly stated that firing the kidou cannon will destroy a significant portion of both Soul Society and the Living World but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So you know that animated gif where Renji and Rukia do a sick backflip off a bridge? No one told me they were backflipping into the valley of screams.

My precious husband says “that would make a good animated gif”. “I got you, babe,” I say.

Okay, literally half the Gotei leadership ignores Yamamoto’s orders and goes to the valley of screams.

One thing I do not like about filler/movies is that they are so afraid to do anything new that they just copy the beats of the canon material, which sort of, I dunno, cheapens it. Like, this movie evokes both Rukia and Renji deserting to save Orihime in Hueco Mundo and the captains doing their own shit at the end of the Soul Society arc, and the overall effect is that no one has any respect for Yamamoto, which I don’t think was the point they were trying to make.

They should have let Orihime go to the valley of screams, but she probably would have fixed the problem in 2 seconds

The group of people who go to the valley of screams is perplexing. Mr. P suggested that the reason Soi Fon is here is because she had previously promised to do something with Omaeda (maybe it’s his birthday??) and was like “oh, shit, sorry man, valley of screams situation came up, catch you next time (i def will not)”

Yoruichi is not in this film. I am assuming she is off being a groupie for the Red Hot Chili Peppers or something.

Hisagi was here for maybe three frames and then did nothing. At least Kira got to release his sword.

Komamura is not here, but he is sort of a Yamamoto simp. We don’t see him hanging out with Ukitake and Kyouraku back at the kidou cannon, tho. Wait. Oh, no. That kidou cannon has gotta be pretty loud. Komamura probably had to go home and put on his thundershirt and hide under the bed.

Soi Fon’s shikai worked??????

RENJI USED ZABIMARU TO CATAPULT ICHIGO OVER SOME ENEMIES TO GO FIGHT THE BOSS!!!! MY HEART!!!!! 🐍💀💪🎇💯😍

I made a bunch of jokes about things Byakuya might be doing (napping, most likely), but then he showed up late and interrupted Rukia’s fight to announce “It is an honor to be slain by my bankai.” Dude, c’mon.

I kinda want to know more about this clan that got done dirty 700 years ago and learned to live in the Dangai like Westley and Buttercup living in the Fire Swamp??

If I had to wander the Dangai, instead of trying to implode the valley of screams and destroy all planes of existence, I would have just made a valley of screams and fixed it up real nice and lived there and not bothered anyone, but that’s just me

Yamamoto has fired the kidou cannon

RIP to Ganryu, you had kind of a cool design, dude, I’m sorry your plan was bad and also that you didn’t get any Vintage Soul Society Flashbacks

I am absolutely perplexed by the end of this film. Despite saving Senna, and being hit with the kidou cannon, the valley of screams is still imploding. Senna stops existing, Ichigo is sad, everyone is saved, it ends with Ichigo seeing a girl who looks like Senna because ???

Who cares! It’s time for Sen no Yoru wo Koete!!!!

Great movie, A+++

#memories of nobody #bleach movies

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gally-hin-phantom · 4 years ago

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I cleanned my stuffs and found old paper doodles, early sketches and ideas for projects !! They're all at least 18-10 months old because my wip list was long *oof*

Now I kinda miss sketching on physical paper...

Check the blurry mess and behind the scene under “Keep Reading”

————————————

Starting with some happy Dannos for an abandoned idea of people patting him (didn’t draw the hands), the right corner one is a sketch for this post

Early idea for this drawing of hurt and captived!Danny

Very very early draft for my first Wes drawing

Very early dirty draft idea of all my fav characters tho I like them all (except Spectra :c !)

Early idea for this comic oof And a bunch of Maddie the cat , I did a full illustration of the middle one but never release it

I really like their dynamic, so different yet so similar I didn’t set a Vlad’s design at this point

Sometimes I like to use my second art style, but not often (Danny and young!Vlad) Straight lines, more cartoony and thin characters

I was trying to find college design ideas, and I never finish poor Tuck 😢 I planned to release all the design the day I finish Dash’s fic (the art is actually finished for a long time now but I wait a bit because Dash’s design is a spoiler) The hourglass is an abandoned idea too

Abandoned idea for stickers/pins for myself (I will probably print those for me instead), an abandoned fluffy Danny!clones family napping idea on the left and an adult!Danny’s suit research on the bottom

Early blood blossoms draft for this transparent art

Early draft for this transparent art and headcanon

A Dani early idea whose became the cover of the Prologue of my comic project you could read it there on Tumblr or on A3O An very early draft of child Sam and child Paulina And a happy child Dash idea for my fic (abandoned idea)

Early sketch for my ghostsona, a Dani, a Maddie the cat, and an early sketch for Star and the side hoes week

Fallen Hero au is actually very old, Danny at the beginning really looks like Dan, omg god it’s very very early drafts, please use your imagination ^^” -Early abandoned idea of Sam and Paulina teaming up on the right upper corner (Sam was supposed to have a purple suit, Val a red one and Paulina a pink one) -Vlad hugging a dying Dani in the middle -Maddie and Jack cornered by evil!Danny in the bottom left -Tucker and Jazz in the right corner, watching Danny’s destructions in front of their computers in their basement (not long before their deaths)

My oc Camille aka Vlad’s secretary, first sketch

Divers ideas, expressions for my Dani comic project, as always you could read the prologue there on Tumblr or on A3O

And the best for the end xD

#danny phantom #gally draws #fallen hero au #ava au #the mistake comic

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lovely-necromancy · 4 years ago

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A Cure for Insomnia CH.6

You wake up sometime around one. Not too late in the day given your morning. With a decent amount of sleep under your belt you roll over and start striping your bed of its sheets. Then you make your way across your room, picking up stray clothes as you go to your hamper and dump your collection of dirty linens and clothes into it. You carry the hamper to the bathroom where you load half into the washer. There's no real point in separating the clothes from colored items and pastels or whites. You're only twenty-four and don't have your life totally figured out yet. You can be a little lazy with laundry.

Once your first load of laundry is being washed you go to do your weekly tidy of your home. The one good thing that came from the paranoia of your car's break in was you rearranged all the furniture of the home, thus cleaning as you went. So that means it's more of a quick wipe down of counters and sweeping today. Maybe you'd organize your art supplies while doing your laundry. It's an activity that wouldn't distract you too much and make you forget you had laundry in the wash.

You finish washing the dishes from this morning you begin wiping the counters and tabletop when you notice your fidget cube is still on the table where Toby left it earlier.

'Don't want to lose this. Back to the bookshelf where you belong.' When you get to the living room's bookshelf you notice one of your book's is missing. Ironically it's The Book Thief.

'Tobias probably picked it up and put it down somewhere.' you'd keep your eyes peeled for the book while you cleaned.

After wiping down bookshelves, tables, counters, even the mantel over the fire place you still hadn't found your missing book. You probably picked it right up and placed it right back down without even realizing. You'll just keep an eye out until you find it. You don't even reread books, you really just kept a copy to lend out to people when they ask what your favorite books are. It isn't a real big deal if you can't find it, plus there's bound to be a copy floating somewhere in a thrift shop or yard sale.

The washer chimes right as you grab the broom to sweep. Pausing this task to go retrieve your laundry and do the rest. You empty the dirty clothes left in the basket onto the floor and place the clean wet ones inside the basket. After starting the final load you carry the basket out back. As nice as this home is its still small and doesn't have a dryer, which early summer is fine but come fall and winter might be more cumbersome. Seeing as you have to hang the laundry out to dry outside. Maybe when it gets cold you'll just do smaller loads and hang them up in the bathroom or over the fire place. But that's a thought for future you. Right now current you is struggling yet again to get a fitted sheet to sit on the line. Fitted sheets are probably Satan himself in disguise.

When you finish stringing all the laundry up you take a moment to just enjoy the quiet and the peace that comes with the outside. It's nice out here, maybe after you finish the last few chores today you can come out and just draw, it'd be a good way to also keep an eye on this weather in case it turns. While it hasn't happened yet you're very aware of the risks you take by ignoring the existence of meteorologists. And by that you mean just not bothering to look up the weather for the day.

Heading back inside you restart your task of sweeping. Like you thought you've finished before the washer has even completed it's first cycle. The house isn't too big so it's easy to clean it from top to bottom within a day normally, but today you had even less to do thanks to this week's rearranging. So you move on to organizing your art supplies and separating all materials by medium.

Of course arranging materials is never easy, after all you end up staring at all your horded empty sketch books and note how your thumbnail notebooks are just covered in doodles and random scribbles but no real art or ideas. Maybe it's time to start kicking yourself into gear. You ran into a major period of burnout before moving and now with this fresh start you might be able to focus on progressing with art, even if you don't pursue it as a career. You've always loved the ability to draw and create images that make others happy. But right in this moment you just want to make yourself happy. Maybe you could start small just a few still lifes and see how you feel after that.

Hearing the chime of the washer you hurry to finish putting away the supplies in their newly assigned places. Just as before you transfer the wet and clean clothes into the awaiting basket and take them out to be hung to dry. You don't have another fitted sheet this go round so it goes by much faster than it previously had. Now with all of your washing for today hung you head back inside to grab a fresh sketchbook.

Having never been one for scenery, more of a portrait artist, you start off with small things. A few stills of a flower under the window, the old tire swing on the tree, and even the blue jay that dove for dinner right in front of you. Of course all of these were warm ups done in a few minutes, though you really wish you had more time on the blue jay one. You really need practice with things that aren't people.

The warm ups of course don't look very good, but you can still see what you'd been going for. The hatching and smudging you'd done, to increase depth and give the quick drawing more life, did help a little but it was clear this was an area where you weren't skilled. But that didn't deter you, after all you needed more practice and wouldn't be getting better without it.

Deciding to draw the scene before you, a small open meadow surrounded by trees, in other words your backyard with your drying laundry. You start off slow and make sure to actually look and take in the yard in front of you, doing your best to not just make up the trees and their shapes as you go. Soon you are lost in the meditative muscle memory of drawing. The scratching of pencil scrapping across paper further lulling you into a trance like state as you etch out the scenery.

A harsh breeze blows through and the loud flapping of sheet hitting sheet knocks you loose from your trance. Checking to make sure none of your laundry was flying off, it hadn't the laundry was still secured to the line. Smiling you glance down to actually see what you've sketched out so far. It isn't too bad, though you aren't sure how long you've been working on it, the trees all have a distinct shape rather than your typical cartoon one size fits all attempts. Scanning the page your eyes catch onto something off, out in the tree line it looks like you'd drawn a figure hiding behind a tree.

Hearing the beating of your heart that's currently hammering against your chest you look around. Did your mind do that as a joke or had someone genuinely been watching you draw? Your mouth is dry as your eyes scan the tree line for any sign of what could've been mistaken for a person, but you saw nothing. No one was there. Had anyone ever really been there? Why would you draw that? Why wouldn't you remember doing it? You don't feel safe out here anymore. There are eyes watching you you can feel it. They may not physically be there but the phantom eyes that surround you and cause your skin to crawl make sure you know of their presence. You take that as a sign to head inside for the evening, one that doesn't need to be repeated.

You lock the door immediately behind you and check your phone. It's seven, and you have an email notification. Thanking whatever power for the distraction you slide down your back door and open the notification. It's from Hollis!

YN r u coming to SND? It's that teen beach zombie movie u love. Y;know the awful D list one Blk and wht with the 50yos playing teenagers

Lemme know I'll save your seat.

Sent 6:47 P.M.

They're so sweet to remember you loved this awful D list zombie movie. Horrible subplots and main plot and all. But you're a little spooked right now and watching even that joke of a horror movie is probably too much for you. You doubt you'd feel better by the time ten rolls around to watch it. Not to mention your battery's still drained from Toby this morning. And knowing for a fact you'd probably stay late to talk till morning with Hollis, Jake, and Kirby you decide it's best to skip this week. Just not having the energy to handle Saturday Night Dead.

Nah, sorry man. Battery's dead from being social earlier. Thanks tho, I do appreciate you! ….....,.... lemme know what next week's movie is!

Sent 7:10 P.M.

It'd probably be a good time to make something for dinner, there's a box of mac n cheese in the pantry. Simple but always beloved. As you wait for Hollis to respond you start on boiling water. But you didn't have to wait too long since they'd answered near instantly.

Chill, don worry we'll catch ya next week

…..oooop

ot not...Kirb's said it's the start of watching the entire warren file collection

starting from the beginning

...well the first movie released, Insidious. LOL we probs won't ever see you again.

Sent 7:12 P.M.

How dare Kirby betray you like this. First off those movies are awful, and like not cheesy awful just awful awful. Not to mention he knows how you feel about the Warrens and their cases. You have a power point presentation ready for that dick the next time you see him. ...well not literally but you'd make one to prove a point!

Where's Kirby now? I just wanna talk, I just wanna talk is all.

Sent 7:18 P.M.

Already ran off toy vermont probably

will we get blessed with a ted talk nxt week?

Sent 7:20 P.M.

I can't tell if you're joking or not. If you aren't then yea I can make a power point and we'll play that instead of the movies. Every week until this town understands the severity of this.

Sent 7:21 P.M.

Ya just jkin.

Your passionate hate is funny tho, so could be good to do something mid warren marathon.

Sent 7:23 P.M.

Guess the dissertation on how horrendous the “exorcisms” were will have to wait. They'd just been joking. This is probably a good ending of the conversation anyway, it's hard to tell sometimes but you feel you'll just run in circles with the current topic or worse fall into a rant that they won't read all the way through because they'll have left with the rest of the stunt gang to get dinner before heading over to the Cryptonomica for Saturday Night Dead. Hollis is typically a real good sport about this kinda thing but you'd rather not bog down their night with your hate boner for the Warrens.

'I'll let them know later that I'll still come to Saturday Night Dead next week.' you think as you dump the pasta into the water that finally came to a boil. It's quiet as you cook your macaroni dinner. You'd normally not notice the lack of sound or life in your home before, but maybe having Connor and Toby over put things into perspective. Guests aren't really a thing you've ever had, you always feel rude if your social battery runs out before someone's stay is over. But maybe you're lonely, and it's put you on edge.

Though this week would've put anyone on edge, you have still been alone in this house for two months. That can't be healthy for your mental well being, humans are social creatures by nature after all. Maybe you could get a pet, something that'd make it's fair share of noise and give the home a bit more life than your normally hollow shell wondering the halls. Are you even sure you want a pet? Do you have time for one? You have the standard nine to five, but what about when you're off on a nightly trip because of your sleeplessness? What if you forgot about them? Hell your brain's been so foggy these last few months, it wouldn't be surprising.

Like a sign from the divine themselves, the pot of water boils over. Steam is rising as the sizzling is heard. Your head snaps twice to the right as you scramble to lower the heat and raise the pot off the eye. Putting it down on an unused eye you give it a quick stir and thankfully no pasta got burned to the bottom of the pan....this time. The pasta seems a little crunchy but a texture you'll eat so you kill the hot eye and start on the cheese portion of your mac n cheese.

As you eat you continue your original debate about getting a pet. Ultimately deciding that you just aren't ready for that kind of responsibility right now. Sure you'd had tons of pets in your parents' home but that was with a financial safety net and back when your mental health wasn't all over the place. Not to mention the pets were family pets and responsibility was split three ways.

There isn't much room in your home for you to have a roommate, and that presents a whole nother set of challenges. You could try to make friends through online forums again! It's hard to talk to people in general but you always get scared off before replying to a comment or post. Or overshare to the point people infantize you. Even better trying therapy out could help with your loneliness. Hah ok good one, even if you had money for it consistently you don't think you could trust someone knowing all your secrets but not knowing any of theirs. And while that in and of it self is an example of why you need it, you're rational enough to realize you aren't ready for that either.

After finishing your meal you put away the left overs and clean the dishes. You'll be happier tomorrow knowing they aren't your problem to deal with. You start to make your way to your bedroom but freeze just before the hall.

'You shouldn't stay here...you need to leave.'

A glance at the time tells you it's eight thirty-nine, if you left right now you could make it to Saturday Night Dead with time to spare. You don't need to fill the loneliness with new friends, just spend time with the ones you already have. Duh. Turning you grab your keys off the bookshelf and take one of the masks hanging from a hook by the door.

Checking your door was locked and locking your car once you were in, you're ready to drive. Knowing you're still overstimulated you forgo the music on this drive, hoping it will calm you down enough to enjoy the movie and some down time with friends. And that would help put a pin in your self isolating habits. It'd really be nice if you brought movie snacks over to surprise the gang. You're pretty sure the mini mart carries everything you need. Jake likes swedish fish, Hollis is addicted to those extreme sour airhead ropes, and Kirby's a weirdo with his love of red vines and surge. Hahaha that man will die before he's thirty-eight.

Still having the extra time you deiced to stop by the mini mart and grab the candy. What's the worse that can happen you have another panic attack in front of strangers. Plus you hadn't seen Magnolia the last few times and you'd hate for her to think you'd been ignoring her. Pulling into the empty mini mart parking lot you take a breath to steel your resolve before leaving your car.

Tim looks at the door when he hears the chime and stiffens when he sees you. Fuck you did have a panic attack in front of this guy last night, plus you really haven't formally met. But didn't Toby say his roommate was named Tim? And he and Brian were both here talking with Tim last night before you came in. That can't be coincidence.

“uh...hi?” you say awkwardly standing in the doorway, door closed behind you.

“um, hi?” perfect he's just as awkward in this situation as you are. You can work with this.

Moving through the first two isles you keep your eyes peeled for Magnolia, even though you can make this an in and out trip for candy, you do miss the little bodega cat.

“Wh- hey are you, are you even ok to be here?” Tim calls as he rounds the counter and makes his way to you.

“Huh? Oh...oh yea. I'm chill now.” you hear the bell before you see her. The little ting tin ting of her bell that comes with the grace only fluffy cats have.

“You literally collapsed on the floor last night after blacking out while driving.” his tone is very stern. He and Nate would probably get on like a house on fire. The grumpy old men who secretly care a lot duo.

“I don't remember collapsing...but I know I didn't drive.” well you don't know that but you do firmly believe that.

The man is just turning into the isle when you spot the floof sauntering just behind him. Magnolia didn't spare either of you a glance as she made her way to the counter. Probably going to her bed, an old shipping box for apples, you'd just meet her over there then. With no warning to the man you squeeze past him and and follow the cat. Agitated footsteps following after you in your quest to pet the cat.

Magnolia perks up upon seeing you, the flicking of her tail letting you know she's anticipating her pets. The huffing Tim hovering behind you isn't as pleased with your actions as the cat is. The man is radiating negativity, annoyance maybe or is it concern that breeds frustrated anger? The second he starts to clear his throat, as if to remind you of his hovering, you roll your eyes.

Looking back at him over your shoulder you see him in all his grumpy man glory. His brow was furrowed so hard his thick eyebrows nearly covered his eyes. But with the way his lips emoted the man before you looked more like a pouting muppet. It would be funny if it weren't for the foreboding feeling of the moments before being reprimanded by a teacher.

When you straighten up you take note that your eyes meet perfectly. He's the same height as you that's surprising, you thought he'd be taller than 5'7. His eyes widen slightly at seeing your full height, it must've thrown him off since the first time he saw you, you'd actively been trying, and had succeeded at looking smaller.

“What are you doing here?” well he doesn't get thrown off for long.

Running a hand through Magnolia's fur a few more times as you respond, “Petting Magnolia.” you really are a little shit sometimes.

“No...no, why are you out? Toby had to take you home last night, you shouldn't just be waltzing around town after that.” maybe it was frustrated concern.

“Oh I'm fine now.”

Magnolia at this point has jumped up on the counter and is headbutting you for more attention. Chuckling you turn your attention back to her. Meanwhile Tim behind you is at a loss for words.

“Fine?? You don't just...bounce back from a panic attack.”there's personal experience behind those words.

“I just rationalize things fast.” Hearing the trill of the clock on the wall reminds you that you need to grab those snacks and head over to the Cryptonomica for movie night.

Going to the candy isle you grab one of each of the gang's favorites, you snag a bag of white cheddar popcorn on the way to the counter and place your items there. Tim doesn't get a word out before you rush off to the cooler near the back that is in all honesty pretty sketch. Like who even makes Fruitopia anymore? That stuff got discontinued in the early 2000s. The cooler even has Hi-C Ecto Coolers...you might actually check if they're in date and grab a few.

Rummaging around the cooler you finally spot the weird tech green and black splattered can proudly stating SURGE. It has no date...questionable at best. But hey it's only Kirby drinking it, and it's been well established that man will die well before middle age. Grabbing a can to check the Ecto Coolers, luck is on your side! These cans are from the re-release that happened as a promotion for the Ghostbusters revival a few years back, they'll be good for another two years! For now you'll just take one so you won't have to worry about lugging cans around for the movie.

Once your new items are placed on the counter the expression on Tim's face cannot even be described. The questions of the surge are probably the ones easiest to read...or they're just the most predictable.

“Kirby likes red vines and surge, sickening right?” Maybe a little joke will break the ice.

“...Like that little round pink...thing?” What?

The laughter is coming out before you can stop it, the image of said pink Kirby consuming red vines and surge only to accessorize as your friend comes to mind. It's adorable and cursed at the same time. Adorably cursed. You'll have to draw that and print a few copies to hang around the Cryptonomica.

“No,” you're choking on giggles at this point, “Kirby, the owner of the Cryptonomica.” catching your breath and regaining your composure, “It's that tourist trap just across from the RV park.”

“Oh.” normally such a short cold reply would make you shut down the conversation. But This is Toby's roommate, and if you want to be friends with Toby, you'll probably run into him a lot more. Plus if he's a new night shift cashier it wouldn't hurt to be on good terms with him for when you're out on adventures.

“Yea, hey Toby mentioned you three just came to town, so you might not have known but the Cryptonomica does a weekly movie night on Saturdays. Saturday Night Dead. Normally it's awful old horror movies but next week they're starting a Warren Case files “arch”.” Tim doesn't take the conversation bait at the pause.

“It's a great way to meet other locals, you guys should check it out if you get the chance. It starts at ten and runs till one or so on most weeks.” Olive branch has been extended.

Tim relaxes for the first time since you got here tonight. The sheepish look on his face and twitchy pupils give the impression he's thinking it over. He sighs and nods before saying, “Yea, that sounds...nice.”

Olive branch skeptically taken! You'll count this one as a win in your book. With the mood lightened Tim breaks the ice a bit further.

“Surge and red vines can not be good for you.”

“Right! If living off mountain dew and pizza rolls doesn't kill him, this for sure will.” you both have a small laugh at that. It's nice to finally have cleared up the mix up from the beginning of the week. Which reminds you.

“Oh...um...I'm YN by the way. It's nice to meet you...sorry for the two,” your neck tics to the side, “previous nights.” you finish.

“Tim...and it,uh happens sometimes...'s fine.” Score awkward acknowledgment of previous meetings and you can now erase those from your nightly anxieties.

Tim finishes ringing and bagging your items and you pay. Giving another pet to the curled up kitty on the counter you nod farewell to Tim.

A trill rings out from the clock on the wall. It's ten.

Two heads snap to look at the wall. You take a second glance at your phone while Tim checks his watch. Both say the clock on the wall is correct. But it just turned nine not even ten minutes ago. Right? You can brush off yourself loosing track of time but when you involve another person that just doesn't make sense. Tim looks just as concerned as you. Only Magnolia lays unaffected by the lost fifty minutes.

“I should go.” Tim nods numbly to you as you exit the store.

You won't be able to make it to the movie, well you could but you'd disturb someone if you walked in mid movie. Choosing to go home instead you drive, once again without music. Entering your home you hang your mask back on the hook. Putting away the drinks and snacks for next weekend, you make your way to your bedroom. Once again freezing just before the hallway. Turning to your living room you can see a book in the middle of your coffee table. You definitely don't remember the book being there, and doubt you'd miss it out in the open. But as you got closer you could confirm, even in the dark, that it was The Book Thief.

#ticci tobyx reader #ticci toby #ticcitoby #reader insert #timothy wright x reader #timothy wright #timothy wright x brian thomas #brian thomas x reader #brian thomas #masky x reader #masky x hoodie #creepypasta fanfic #A cure for insomnia

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darkestfable · 4 years ago

Text

Safe Haven

Oribos

Raetos groaned as he found his way back to the waking world. He knew he was alive by how much his body ached. His head, most of all, felt like someone was hammering multiple nails in place. Only one luminous eye opened, the other still swollen shut under bandages wrapped around his head. His abdomen was also strapped tightly. He could feel the pressure of the wrappings limiting his movement, as to not aggravate what he assumed was broken ribs. The wound on his arm had been well cleaned and bandaged. Someone had been talking very good care of him.

He smiled, not having to wonder who, feeling the body curled up against his own. Tilting his head down, he caught a glimpse of the top of Fable’s head… there was no mistaking those lovely indigo locks.

“How long have I been out?” He asked.

For just a moment, Fable grumbled and curled more tightly against Raetos. If this was a dream, he didn’t want to wake up. The hellscape that had been The Maw was no longer ringing in his ears, and his lover was by his side again. This had to be a dream. It was never this good.

Or was it?

The blood hunter finally peeled open his eyes, sitting up after a moment to look over the large lightforged next to him. His heart fluttered at the sight of his lover’s smile, and he reached over to lay a gentle hand onto his bandaged chest. This had been no small feat, what Raetos and the others had pulled off.

“Days, love. Take as long as you need, yeah? I ain’t goin’ nowhere,” Fable’s expression softened as he curled his fingers against the bandages on Raetos. Yep, still there. Still real.

The Draenei’s smile only grew wider as he reached up with his good hand to cup the side of his lover’s face. Raetos didn’t understand much of anything about death and spirits. But Fable looked well. Looked healthy. Better than he had in the Maw, for certain.

“Careful what you say, Babe. I might ask to stay here forever,” he said, flashing his signature grin, “...wherever here is.”

It suddenly dawned on him that they couldn’t be on Azeroth. They still had to find the soul dagger to get Fable his body back… and they obviously weren’t in the Maw anymore. Last thing he remembered was a very pissed off Avehi.

“Uh… where are we?”

“Oribos. Think that’s what they call it, anyway. Kinda a hub for uh...all sorts ‘a people,” Fable glanced at the door, as if the answer would be there. Truthfully, he’d been more worried about Raetos than asking about the name of the establishment.

He leaned over Raetos carefully to kiss him. Tender, sweet, and like he’d been afraid he’d never see him again. Everything had culminated to this point, and truthfully Fable wasn’t sure what he was doing. Getting out of The Maw had been his first task, but the blood hunter wasn’t sure if he could retrieve the dagger by himself. Wasn’t sure he’d want to do it alone. Doubt weighed heavily on him, tied down by the guilt of what he’d done to get here in the first place.

“Hey, love… You got my body, yeah? I’m gonna have somethin’ t’ go back home t’ when this shit is figured out? ‘n th’ animals are taken care of?” his voice was quiet, almost unsure. Fable loved their little life that they’d built, and still worried that he’d ruined it all.

“Mhm,” the Draenei managed a nod, thumb stroking his lover’s cheek, “The tree elf dude you got to take care of the animals while we were away agreed to stay as long as needed. I think we owe him a really REALLY big tip. Obligation and Responsibility really seems to like him, though, so don’t have to worry about them. Did you know he lived in that big ass tree that the Horde burned down? That’s where he got all the scars. Poor guy… Anyway, I was able to find your body at the dig site after going through your maps and stuff. Brought it to the healer chick that was deployed to Darkshire with me. You’re in a coma-like state back on Azeroth, and she’s keeping you nourished and stable until we manage to destroy that dagger.”

He paused in his rambling for a moment, knowing the next part was a bit touchy.

“Hey… uh… on that subject. Bad memories, I know. But like… anything you can tell me about the lady that stabbed you… physical description or name… if she gave you one…”

Another pause before adding.

“Was she hot? She must be hot.”

“Well, yeah… I mean it ain’t like I got bad taste,” Fable smirked, then paused a moment. “Wait, tree… They’re called Kal’dorei.”

The news of his body being taken care of was something of a relief, though the blood hunter still didn’t like the situation at all. Cebina had royally screwed him, and now he had to go find that dagger too? This was just getting more and more complicated…

“She uh… I’d know her if I saw her, yeah? While you were restin’ tho, I asked ‘round ‘bout the dagger ‘n souls ‘n shit ‘n this creepy lookin’ dude called a Venthyr told me ‘bout this place called Revandreth. Said a lady was there ‘n might have a dagger kinda like it?” Fable scratched at his chin in thought.

“Sounds like our next destination,” Raetos nodded, a cheerful smile on his face, “I know it’s not the best of situations, but we get to explore this whole new place together, and I’m sure we can get supplies so that you can map it all out.”

Obviously it would have been much more ideal to have Fable whole for the adventure, but there was no harm in seeing the bright side of the situation.

“Soon as moving doesn’t hurt anymore…” he winced as he shifted, “So... what’s a Venty. Not another type of elf, is it?—Not that there’s anything wrong with elves! There’s just so many different kinds and I can barely keep up with the ones I know.”

“Venthyr, luv. They’re like uh...anima vampires? Ain’t too clear on ‘em yet but I was watchin’ ‘em wander through Oribos while you were restin’,” Fable pulled out a notebook he’d obviously obtained here in the Shadowlands. A keen eye would notice that its leather bindings were a bit unlike any leather on Azeroth.

The first few pages were sloppy, slightly disproportionate sketches of the various different types of people he’d seen wandering through, along with notes of things he’d either overheard or asked them flat out. The page with the Venthyr man had no notes, however. Clearly, the hunter hadn’t approached him.

“They got fangs ‘n glowin’ eyes kinda, most of ‘em are real skinny. Nice clothes though, ‘n some of ‘em wear thigh high boots. Thinkin’ maybe I should get a pair?” the elf chuckled, leaning to stretch his leg out as far as he could, toes pointed.

“Babe, you would look hella amazing in those boots,” the Lightforged agreed, “Are there any with heels? If so, you should avoid them, because then, your already sexy ass will just look too good for me to resist. Afraid you won’t get anything done in that case.”

His hand slipped down to give his partner’s behind a little squeeze, before he attempted to sit up. It was a more daunting task than anticipated with his injuries, but he managed.

“Fashion sense aside, are these Venthyr people safe? The one you drew has like… an evil look to him. Or are they all that withered looking and ugly? Also, what’s anima? And what are the lampshades with legs that you drew in there?”

A smirk spread on his lips at the squeeze, but his attentions to the affections were pulled away when Raetos was trying to sit up. Fable assisted, but his brow furrowed in worry. Had his lover been hurt worse than initially thought? Damn it all, now he was fretting like a mother hen. The lampshades comment pulled the hunter out of his head though, and he just blinked for a moment before tilting the book towards him.

“The lampshades with legs? Oh, those?” Fable pointed at one of the doodles of a Broker. “They call themselves Brokers. They help facilitate trade of goods and services. Information too, ‘m sure. Ain’t got a chance to really chat jus’ yet.”

The concern crept up onto the elf’s face again, and he leaned over to kiss Raetos’ cheek.

“You doin’ okay? If you gotta rest…”

Raetos shook his head.

“Nah, just sore is all. The headache is the worst part, probably. Dude, Avehi hits -hard-! Did you see how pissed she was? Ha! Good times!”

He smiled brightly to his lover, bringing his hand up to cup the side of his face again.

“Honestly, I’ve rested plenty. I just want to look at you,” he admitted, “I missed you so much, Bae… so don’t mind if all I want to do is cuddle and make out for a while.”

He paused, before adding with a wink.

“Wouldn’t hate a blow job either.”

The elf just smiled. That sappy, sweet, completely enraptured smile as he nuzzled into Raetos’ hand. It had felt like an eternity, fighting for his life. Being reunited had been on his mind the whole time, but even now Fable’s heart ached for the life they’d had before. Though, in the middle of his thoughts, a smirk broke through. That was the Raetos he knew.

“Oh, I’m sure you wouldn’t…” Fable turned his head to place a kiss in the palm of Raetos’ hand. “If it won’t hurt you, I’m gonna swallow you whole…”

“I mean… not like I can move much in these bandages,” he grinned, running his thumb along Fable’s bottom lip, “Doubt I’d be able to find a way to hurt myself.”

He paused as he thought about that a moment.

“—Okay, so I would -probably- find a way to hurt myself. But it would be hella worth it, though.”

Fable caught Raetos’ thumb between his lips, cerulean eyes closing as he pressed the barbell through his tongue against the calloused pad. A promise. As his lover spoke, the elf savored the taste of his flesh, finally opening his eyes to look up at him with a smirk. He released the thumb after a moment only to place a kiss into Raetos’ palm.

“Jus’ sit back ‘n enjoy then. You deserve t’ be worshipped,” he mumbled against the blue skin, continuing to kiss down from his hand to his wrist. Of course, he’d wait for permission.

It felt like lifetimes since he’d been away from Raetos, and only minutes that they’d been back together again. Fable felt that familiar skin hunger, but it had only gotten stronger after they were in safety, and he could touch and smell his lover again. The blood hunter had to remember to pace himself; Raetos was still recovering, and they were still in a strange place. But tomorrow could wait. Tonight belonged to them.

(Raetos is @raetos / @kidcatgemini )

#Fable #Raetos #Raeble #romance #world of warcraft #rp log #void elf #lightforged draenei #flirting

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oh-for-fic-sake · 5 years ago

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Trophy chapter four

Masterlist

Warnings: Adult Themes Dubcon,Controlling Behaviour, Swearing, Smut +18 Only

Chapter 0ne Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter five Chapter Six

Your escape doesn’t go as planned as Henry reveals just how much power he truly has.

You were just over a week into your 'stay' at Henry's manor and had just about had enough. Youd spent the last few days in a constant fit of frustration. I had become very clear in the first few days that you were nothing more than a toy, a doll for him to coo over and manipulate. Or maybe a better way to discribe it was the girl in a childs music box being made to dance when ever the owner decided to open the lid. Either way you felt trapped used and helpless, at first he made sure you spent as much time as possible together taking you to the office when he had to work, sitting you on the sofa with a book or parade you around the house.

After that he would put you in what became your daily cell tho never alone if he wasnt with you kal was. Day after day you were left in here a freshly decorated room that youd heard the guards refer to as the play room, it was like a large airy living room like somthing from pintrest a plush looking corner sofa around a light coffee table,large tv on the wall above the fireplace with games consoles neatly tucked away,two floor to ceiling book cases either side ,there was a cabinet full of dvds and games behind the sofa opposite there was a sideboard filled with sketch books, pens and pencils ect and a two seat small dining table sat between the two cabinets. The room was a mix of soft pale pinks and blues and was chock full of soft furnishings pillows and various blankets draped here and there and huge faux fur rug . The window was locked being ground level ,that was the first thing you checked when left alone ,not that you'd get far across the gravel drive he had made a point not to give you shoes. The saying bare foot in the kitchen sprung to mind.

He would visit you when you were in here at lunch forcing you to eat with threats of spanking sometimes worse. Being treated like a child was wearing thin and to be quiet honest you were becoming scared,finding it easier to go along with his insanity, you called him daddy without a thought somewhere in the back of your mind you knew it was wrong but after just over a week he had managed to drum it into you. It was frighteing just how quickly you could be conditioned you had to get out soon. He was overbearing always helping himself to you, kissing ,touching and generally trying to act as if you were a couple until you did something he didnt like then it was back to threats and reality hit.

Today was slightly different you woke up curled on your side his henry lazily running his finger through your hair you squinted rubbing your eyes as he leant over kissing your shoulder before running hi hand across your tummy spreading out his fingers and pulling you back against his crotch, he rocked against your bottom groaning quietly into your hair as you felt his cock springing to life he grinded harder against you before shuffling pinning you flat on your back straddling you pulling your legs to rest either side of his hips you whined in protest trying to shuffle from under him when he pulled you down tight against him he just tilted his head raising and eyebrow. The warning was clear behave. He rubbed against your mound sliding his cock along the seam pf your pussy. You closed your eyes tight already feeling the arousal build inside of you dreading what was to come, you couldnt help how your body reacted you tried to just let him get on with it but each morning he managed to coax you into participating a little more, not letting you distance yourself any longer. He grunted low i his throat as he pumped himself against you resting his weight on his hips one hand cuped the top of his cock squeezing it against you as he pushed it against your clit. You gasped as you felt his throbbing cock against you pulling high pitched moans and whines as you bit your lip trying to keep quiet. He chuckled

"Oh fuck... thats it baby girl ...come on let daddy hear you." You shook your head back and forth as your pussy weeped onto him soaking both of you you found your self panting hard when he groaned grabbing one of your hands replacing his over his cock you tried pulling away and he growled at you.

"Stay still baby.... fuck thats it good girl.. your so good for daddy" he groaed deep as he sped up before leaving wet open mouthed kisses on your collar bone then kissed up to your lips trying to pry your mouth open you turned your head away. He sighed moving his hand into the boxers that you wore finding your swollen clit flicking and pinching harshly causing you to buck and cry out, he quickly took the opportunity to invade your mouth tasting your tongue sucking you into a passionate kiss he let go of your hand placing his hand pressing your knee up to your torso spreading you out for him rubbing his cock faster with jerky thrusts skimming your opening with every movement you gripped the sheets twisting them as you felt your walls trying to clench onto him desperate for him to fill you you rocked back against him looseing yourself in him as he smothered you he released your mouth biting down on your neck leaving a mark alongside yesterdays. You became hot, to hot as you flushed under him chasing your own end grinding up against him

"Oh! oh god please! Please i cant" you babbled incoherently as he repositioned his hand thumbing your clit and thrusting into you harshly with his fingers bouncing your body across the bed you let out a load moan as his hand worked furiously rubbing amd curling his finding your soft spot befor zeroing in and running his fingers harshly across it you cired bucking out at him unsure of you wanted hi to go faster or get off your climax built and he chuckled as your clamped down on his fingers to the point of pain

"Aww baby you want to cum dont you? Thats it good girl so good is it to much?" he didnt relent still masaging that spot you nodded and cried tears falling down your face you couldnt breath it was to much

"Then cum, its ok you can cum, cum for daddy ,all over daddies fingers" you hated how his wods pushed you over the edge and even then he didnt stop he seemed to double his efforts when you arched violently with a silent scream gushing over his fingers he continued moving draggin out your orgasm he moved higher running the underside of his cock across your mound with stuttering hips.

"Oh..OH shit YES YES fuck! OH GOD Little one fuck" he let out a long gruntle moan as he finished spraying cum up your front you both laid there panting. Shame washed over you like it had done every morning he did this. You felt dirty and used he rolled on his side tucking you in his arms kissing your head praising you for how good you were and telling you how much he loved you as you curled ijto him wetting his tinto him overwhelmed. After a few moments the saddness past and you laid stock still against him as he pulled you to lie across him head on his chest stroking your hair once again.

"Iv got to go out today pet. I trust youll be good whne im gone and if your lucky I'll get you a treat" you froze at his words gojng out... that meant youd be alone the thlught filled you with dread and anticipation.

"If your naughty you will regret it when i get back."you both laid there for what felt like hours he wouldnt let you move. Tho he finally let out a breath and ushered you to the bath room showering with you. After getting dressed and having breakfast he left and you noticed he didnt put you any where. You dread to think what he was doing. But you were left the run of the house. So here you sat in the kitchen alone in the huge house apart from the security he kept on site. 'This was it.. or was it a test?..' you raced to the living room window and watched an expensive car leave the gates at the bottom of the drive as it dissapeared behinde the wall that clossed off the property. You debated in your head if he was just waiting to see if you were going to try and run or not. You had to try, somthing was happening to you here ,you didnt like how complacent you were getting with him. It was cruel really the only person that was aloud to interact with you was him, you find yourself almost craving him, you enjoyed his praise lapping it up liike a love sick school girl.

Deciding that this may be the last time you could escape before it was to late you walked into the kitchen slowly as not to alert anyone to your plan even tho your heart was racing ten to the dozen. Quickly and quietly you pulled a small packet of plasters from one of the draws. Throught out your stay you learnt a few things all the doors leading outside and your 'play room' had pressure alarms built in you'd set one off on your forth day trying to get out into the garden resulting in another painfull and very embarassing spanking in the kitchen then experienced your first corner time, the other thing you learnt were all the guards had shifts and patrol routes the house ran like clockwork youd freighed interest in him and he'd waffled on about how it wasnt all bad and he'd take you out when you'd acclimated to your new life then boasted about the cars he had in the basment garage but you'd 'never get to drive one as driving these fast cars is to dangerous for his baby girl'. Tho you hadnt made a thing of it you kept the information locked away youd been behaving hopeing he would let down his gaurd. Once you got the plasters you put them in the pocket of your cardigan and grabbed a butter knife hooking it in the back of your jeans wedging it just under the tight waist band.

"What are you still doing in here? Get to the playroom" you screamed in suprize as the voice came out of no where you spun round faceing the man and nodded walking past him quickly.

"Wait. What have you been doing in here?" He said grabbing your arm pulling you to a stop you huffed tugging your arm.

"Let go i havent done anything" you twisted around as he patted you down you froze mouth going dry as you thought he was going to find the knife in your jeans he didnt instead his hands found the packet of plasters the cocked an eyebrow

"Im doing some crafts today these are incase i get a paper cut...im clumsy and tthought i should take a pack the keep in there just incase" he eyed you for a few seconds befor smirking at you

"So the princess was sneaking about for some plasters, im suprised you werent trying to sneak candy, would be more fitting for his baby girl." He laughed as you glared at him venomously

"Fuck you ,you cunt" you spat in his face he growled before grabbing your arm in a bruising grip dragging you out of the kitchen down the hall as you screamed at him, a few others poked their heads around to watch asking what was wrong as you were dragged down the hall once outside your day room he stopped pressing a card to the reader next to the handle disarming the door and answered their qeustioning stares.

"Nothing just a temper tantrum im sure she will regret later when Boss finds out." He turned back to you.

"He might even make a show of it, i wouldnt mind seeing her bent over" you growled as he opend the door throwing you in , grunting as you landed hard on the floor he whistled for kal and let the dog enter behind you befor shutting the door arming the device again. Shaking away tears in your eyes as you heard then others laugh about how theyd love to see 'a piece of that ass' kal sat beside you nudging you for a cuddle you hugged him breathing deep nuzzling his thick fur, he was the only company you enjoyed here after snuggling with him a few minuets you pulled away putting your plan into action you got out suome supplies fro the art cupborads scattering them hear and there to make it look like you had been drawing, hopefully if anyone came in and found you missing they would assume that you had asked one of the others to let you use the bathroom as the ensuite to this room wasnt finished. You aproached the door pulling out the knife and lowered it to the door handle, the worst thing about this system was that you werent technically locked in, the door opend but set off an alarm that was indicated by a small red flashing light on the card reading panel. Breathing deep you pulled out a plaster removing the tabs on it sticking oneside to your finger. Gentle you pulled down on the handle until you couldnt anymore easing the knife alongside the door pushing on the plate you pivoted your body opeing the door enough to get your hand in the gap and stuck the plaster over the bottom of the pressure plate securing it down. Holding your breath you waited a few moments before summerizing that it had worked when noone came rushing down the hall you quickly slipped thrpugh the door catching kal befor he could make his way out and shut the door fully. You blinked then jumped for joy you could bearly see the edge of plaster on the frame. Quickly you jogged to the end of the hall ducking low realising that not having shoes might be a god send as you were almost silent as you moved you got another plaster ready on your hand as you ducked and dived behind the counters in the kitchen making your way around to the door Henry had left through.'it must have been to the garage' you though you made quick work of the door not waiting to see if the alarm had set off as you heard foot steps coming your way you slipped through the door closing it behinde you and ran down the stairs into a large garage on the left there was lots of hooks with keys on them you toke shaky breaths scanning them befor looking over the cars there must have been about eleven in total ranging from massive range rovers to calssy two seater sports cars. 'I need on that can blend in, a hatch back or somthing, maybe a saloon' you thought running down the line of cars the most normal looking one was a Jag you quickly ran to the keys looking for a set with the same logo as the car finding two you grabbed them both pushing unlock on one set seing another car across light up you threw them on the floor using the other one to unlock the car getting in quickly you felt your tummy tie itself in knots turning on the ignition and pulled the seat forward you put on your seatbelt out of habbit then dojng a small cheer when you saw it was an automatic you put it in drive wincing as it growled to life louder then it needed to be you pulled it up to the garage door and it opend you pulled it forward going up the bank once at the top you saw a gaurd stopping staring befor shouting out to the others.

"Dont let the gate open!!" You panicked and floored it the car took off down the drive skidding you a stop near the gate the instantly began rolling open. On gaurd was sprinting down the drive behinde you. You looked down for a button to look the doors finding it by the window controls you flicked it on and heard the click at all four doors locked lokking up you saw the gate had stopped half way you spun the wheel throwing the scar around squeezing the car throuh the gate clipping the wing mirror off in the process putting your foot down you gave a triumphant shout as you tore down the road away from that house. Leaning back into the seat relaxing as you made yourway towards the town, it was the only way to get to the motorway that would lead out of the area. You wiped tears from your eyes as as relief flooded you sobs wracked your body the drive to the town took longer than you thought it would and you were suspicious as no one had chased you from the house and had spent the whole drive flinching at every car that pulled up behind you. Pulling up to a round about you stopped recognising the area deciding to take a less busy route pulling off to the outskirts of town you parked up into a superstore looking threw the car for money finding a few £20 notes a tap at the window you screamed turning it was a police officer you gulped looking in the rearveiw mirror seeing a squad car pulled up behind you blocking you in, he indicated for you to roll down the window.

"Yes can i help you?" You asked trying to sound normal

"Miss did you realise your missing a wing mirror?" You followed his gaze and smiled meekly. Getting a bad feeling in your gut.

"Yes, its my boyfreids car i borrowed it and hit a sign back there im going to book it in now hopefully get it done and he wont find out i hurt his baby" you ended with a chuckle patting the steering wheel he didn't look convinced and motioned for his colleague to join him

"Uh huh, so are you insured to drive this car? Sure you didnt hit another car?" You shook your head

" Well i hope im insured he said hed made me a name driver and no i didnt hit anyone, the car caught me by suprize i hadnt realised how much oommf it had and still getting used to the size its a bit wider then mine." You explained hoping you were convincing enough he smiled the held out his hand to you.

"Can i see your licence?" You froze then pretended to look around the car for it

"Oh shit i dont have my bag on me sorry can i give you my name instead and you can look it up on the system?" You pleaded hoping that he would let this one go

"So you dont have your purse on you? When your taking his car to the garage to get it fixed?.... yeah im gonna have to ask you to step out of the car now." He said moving back from the door you looked behind you panicking there was no way to pull out.

"Wh-what? Why?" You cried out as he put his hand in the car opeing the door

"No! No you cant do this you dont understand please!" You shouted at him as he undid your seatbelt pulling you out of the car cuffing your hands behind your back reading you your rights.

"Your under arrest for car theft,careless driving and driving with out insurance , you have the right to remain silent anything you do say can harm your defence and used in court ,Call it in we found Mr cavills car" you froze, hed called in that his car had been stolen. He used the police to track you. You wailed twisting against him as you realised why no one had chased you, he was using the police to bring you back to him.you cried as he dragged you to the squad car.

"NO! You dont understand he kidnapped me! Please you have to let me go! He's mad he locked me up please you have to help me." You kicked out as he forced you into the back seat on the car slamming the door you sobbed in the back seat as they locked up the jag and got in the front of the car.

"Please do make me go back i dont know what he'll do" you cried pitifully they sighed looking at you threw the plexiglass.

"Im sorry love there's nothing we can do for you... i wish there was but its our asses on the line" then he started the car driving towards the station. It wasnt long befor you found yourself in a cell heavy metal door between you and your escape laying on the bed crying and terrified of whats to come. Panicking everytime you heard foot steps down the hall thinking it was him. It was over an hour later when you jumped as the heavy lock on your door opened with a loud bang revealing a calm looking Henry standing beside a sympathetic looking officer he shooed them away.

"Give us a minute" he didnt take his eyes off you as he stepped into the room seemed to take over the small space you shuddered backing away from him sending a pleading look to the officer who ingored you and left.

"Well pet have you got that out of your system now?" He said crossing the cell in large strides his suit jacket hung over one arm that was in his pocket. You shook your head crying

"Pl-please im sorry i-i had to" you flinched as he brought his hand to your face. Smoothing back your hair

"Sshhh shh its ok now everything is going to be fine" he calmed you pulling his outher hand up wiping your tears away before for twisting his fist in your hair you yelped clawing at his hand trying to relieve the pain in your scalp.

"You've been a very very naughty girl havent you?" He tugged your hair back forcing you to look at him still wiping your face with his other. It summed him up caring and kind yet brutal and cruel. He grinned a sadistic grin

"I should let you know that im not pressing charges, what kind of boyfreind would i be if i did?" He teased you letting you know he was told your cover story you cried in pain as he dragged you the few steps towards him forcing you onto your tip toes

"STOP! Please Henry your hurting me!" He tutted at you looking at his watch

"Three hours away from the house and were back to Henry? What happened to Daddy? Well it doesnt matter i hope now you realise that there is no escape. You cannot run or hide from me love i have eyes everywhere." He lowerd you back down releasing your hair clutching you to his chest trapping you in a strong grip as you sobbed shaking like a leaf more out of anxiety then anything else.

"Shh shh. its ok little one... i know its been a scary day getting out , nearly crashing into the gate and then being arrested? its all going to be ok, now that you've got this out of your system you can finally settle at home. Ihave been waiting for this little blow up from you i was beginning to think the gun fiasco was it" His words filled you with dread as you began to sink in this was it for you, that there was no way out, he would find you at some point. Rocking you backwards and forwards with your arms trapped at your side he tucked his nose into your hair kissing it every so often.

"Tho this is probably my fault it was enavitable for you to try and run again, i havent trained you properly yet, not givin you the attention you truly need, but dont worry we will start once we get home. I want you to know daddies not angry, no no he's just dissapointed" he pulled back draping his jacket over your shoulders.

"I hope you know that your still in serious trouble when we get home young lady i warned you this morning that youd regret playing up" he murmmerd into your ear as he walked you out of the cell down to the reception he didnt hold you because he didnt need to there was nowhere you could go.

"Mr cavill would you sign these ,I assume your not pressing charges?" Henry looked up winking at you

"No no my girlfriend couldnt help herself, she's like a child in that respect no self restraint. Never thinks of her consequences" You shuddered catching the his unspoken threat looking down as tears of humiliation the officer chuckled as Henry said this sighing his name

"Well she does look distraught, dont be to hard on the little thing I'd jump at the chance to drive one of those myself."

Henry laughed out loud drawing some attention from the others in the waiting room

"Oh dont you worry about her, she'll find a way to make it up to me somehow wont you babygirl" he said winding an arm around your waist pulling you against him squeezing his hand painfully tight. You looked down nodding hearing a few snickers and scoffs from women in seats behind you.

"Now apologize to the officer for wasting his time baby." You scowled up at him being met with a shit eating grin opening your mouth to tell him to fuck off thankfully you were interupted.

"Oh now thats not nessasary saving a tiny thing like her from herself isn't wasting time ..I'm glad I could help" Henry smiled at you kissing your cheek feeling please with himself.

"Now isnt that nice sweety. He's happy to help us" you gave a jerky nod as Henry finished the paperwork.

"I will have someone collect the car today" he called over his shoulder as he forced you along side him stopping before he got out of the door.

"Oh baby Wheres your shoes?" He asked smirking at you knowing damn well that he hasnt got you any, you felt the eyes of the other people on you as he shook his head picking you up cradling you recieveing a few awws and judgmental stares from the women. Unable to take it anymore you tucked your face into his neck crying.

"Im sorry please im so sorry i wont do anything like this again". He sighed pushing throught the doors and made his way to the car park climbing into the back or a range rover holding you in his lap as the car began moving.

"Its a little to late for sorry baby, daddy has to punish you for being an extremly naughty little girl. Stealing and damaging daddies car running away and getting arrested lying to the police? What kind of daddy would let you get away with all that?" You shuddered mind wandering what he had instore for you, not just for punishment but the training he mentioned in the cell you squirmed in his lap as you mulled it all over feeling sick to your stomach.

#henry cavill x reader #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill fic #henry cavill smut #daddy henry cavill #mob boss henry cavill #henry cavill is daddy

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kriscme · 4 years ago

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One Life to Live

Hi, so now we come to the end. The final two chapters. Thanks to everyone who’s been following this story. It can be read on AO3 too. My name is Kris22 there. As always, thanks to Ronja for allowing me to write fanfic of her Hunger Games fanfic “The Chance You Didn’t Take” available on AO3 and Fanfiction. And thanks to Loueze for her encouragement and support. Chapter 37 By the time the television crew was due to arrive, Peeta and I were as convincingly in love as two people could possibly be. Of course, it was helped a great deal by the fact that we actually were. Even so, we were hardly looking forward to our private lives becoming public again and cameras following us around as we went about our daily routine. We worried about how intrusive it might be. Cressida had promised it would be tasteful, but the Capitol idea of tasteful can be very different from the districts. I was afraid that it might be like that show I once saw on television about a houseful of people under constant surveillance. They couldn’t even shower in privacy. Would it be like that for Peeta and me? Would they follow us into the bedroom? Expect us to perform? Our one consolation was that we’d be left alone once filming had ended and we vowed to ourselves that we’d do nothing newsworthy for the rest of our lives. The day came. The house had been cleaned and tidied. Everything was where it was supposed to be to reflect a couple who lived together as romantic partners. Buttercup was bathed and freshly groomed. I had the scratches to prove it. Peeta, always considerate, had baked an assortment of breads for the crew, although I told him he shouldn’t bother. At 7 am everything was in readiness. 10 am came and went. And then 11 am. At 2 pm we were still waiting. At 4 pm we wondered if we’d got our dates wrong. It was 6 pm when Haymitch finally got around to telling us. They weren’t coming. At all. The video Remus took had violated victor media protection. I had been filmed without my consent, wasn’t engaged in illegal activity and hadn’t voided my own protection by taking on a public role or seeking publicity. Plutarch knew this but gambled that in our ignorance, we could be coerced into co-operating. And once filming had started, our media protection was automatically revoked, since we had clearly consented to it. It took only one phone call from Haymitch to President Paylor to have it sorted. I suppose it’s of some consolation that Plutarch was severely reprimanded and threatened with dismissal. And that he was also out of pocket for the purchase of the video and pre-production costs. As for Haymitch, I couldn’t decide whether to thank him or kill him. He had certainly saved us from our lives being turned into a media circus for a second time but he’d let us have the worry of it for a whole week. Peeta calmed me down and reminded me that it had brought us together. Haymitch’s defense was that he was sick to death of our crap and wanted an end to it. He thought that a week of living together would get us sort out our differences and he was proven right. I argued that it would have happened anyway, although I had to concede probably not as quickly. With that in mind, I decided to let him live. The year rolls around. Peeta doesn’t move back into his house. It was never discussed; it was simply taken for granted. We keep busy. Peeta still works at the bakery as a specialist cake decorator. He’s a partner now. The sign above the new premises reads “Carter and Mellark Bakery and Patisserie.” I teach at the school and on weekends I hunt. Marcus wrote to ask if I was interested in culling pest species such as wild dog and feral pig. I jumped at it. It seems you can be a hunter and a conservationist. Haymitch works at the council and raises geese, which he does a pretty good job of considering he’s inebriated most of the time. We attend two weddings and one toasting. Arthur and Lace don’t wait long before they tie the knot, or to be more accurate, thread the needle. Predictably, it was the source of much hilarity for Max, who was also invited. At least he refrained from making jokes until after the ceremony. I enjoyed catching up with Sateen and her husband Roy. They have a little boy. They called him Felt. Poor kid. The second wedding was Octavia and Thom’s. Octavia made a beautiful bride with her rich auburn hair and fresh complexion. Venia’s fear that their past as prep team to the Games would jeopardize their position in 12 proved needless. Everyone knew who they were. They’d seen them on television. Flavius’s bright orange hair and Venia’s facial tattoos made them easily recognizable. But people had moved on. They were tired of holding onto resentments – especially for three harmless beauty therapists whose former “victim” still willingly availed herself of their services. The toasting was ours. One day, we just did it. There was no planning, no prior understanding that we’d have one. It was the middle of winter. We were snowed in and confined to the house. Peeta got a roaring fire going and we picnicked in front of it using odds and ends from the pantry. We had some stale bread to use up and toasted it by the fire. He’d hold the toasting fork with a piece of bread to the flames and offer it to me when it was done. The significance of it entered our heads at the very same moment. It was just a look followed by a kiss. Nothing needed to be said. One day we might make it official, but for us we’re more married than any piece of paper or big party could make us. Johanna won the election for District 7 mayor. She’s kept very busy but we talk on the telephone regularly. She’s coming to visit 12 for a few days next month. Doubtless she’ll be as disruptive as ever. But sometimes we can use a little stirring up. That’s what Johanna says anyway. She takes full credit for getting Peeta and me back together and I can’t say she’s entirely wrong. And we had a visit from my mother! I had her possessions shipped to her home in District 4 and it seemed to have jolted something inside her, because soon after she was making plans to travel here. It was a short visit. She was nervous about coming here, of the memories it could evoke. But aside from the Village, there’s nothing left of the old Twelve. The debris from the bombs has long since been cleared away, new buildings have replaced the old, and the grass grows long and thick over the meadow. We had a long talk about her reasons for not joining me in Twelve after I’d been released from the Capitol. She feared being pulled down into a depression along with me. I understood. When you’re in the grip of it, you can see no way out. My mother, having recovered once, was deathly afraid that she wouldn’t recover a second time. And since misery feeds on misery, she would likely have only made mine worse. Peeta is somewhere in the house repairing the painting of the primrose he did for me. I don’t visit Prim in her room anymore except for that one time I when I wanted to tell her about my toasting with Peeta. She wasn’t there. She hasn’t been for a long time. It was then I realized that Prim doesn’t reside in any particular place. She’s with me every time I think of her. I took down the primrose painting from the top of the dresser. It belongs somewhere where I will see it every day. I had an idea for a book, similar to my family’s plant book. It’s to preserve the happy memories of the people we’ve lost. Lady licking Prim’s cheek, what Cinna could do with a length of silk. In my best handwriting, I carefully record all the details it would be a crime to forget and accompany it with a photo if we have one, or a sketch or painting by Peeta. There are photos of Finnick strewn across the dining table as I try to make my mind up on which one to use - a publicity shot that shows off Finnick’s sea-green eyes or a photo taken of himself and Annie at their wedding. “Katniss, I was looking for some kind of adhesive tape to fix the painting and I found this letter in one of the drawers in the study. It was addressed to me, so I opened it.” I look up, wondering what Peeta’s talking about. He holds the painting in one hand and a sheet of paper in the other. He leans the painting up against a wall and then pulls out one of the dining room chairs to sit across from me. He lays the letter down in front of him. I immediately recognize the handwriting on it as my own. It’s the first letter I wrote to him after the mayor’s party before I thought better of it and wrote a second. But not before putting it in an envelope and stuffing it in a drawer. I’d forgotten all about it. I try to snatch the letter away but he swiftly puts it out of my reach. “Dear Peeta,” he reads. “I’m writing to you because – ““You don’t have to read it. I know what’s in it,” I say. “Give it back.” I make another grab for it but he’s too fast. “. . . because I’m sure to get it wrong, or miss something important if I do this face to face.” He stops reading and hands me the letter. I take it from him, refold it, and slip it beneath the memory book, hoping against hope, that this will prevent any more mention of it. “Did you really want to break off all contact with me?” he asks, frowning. “I didn’t think it ever got that bad. When? Why?” I sigh. Why didn’t I throw the damn letter out? “It was after the mayor’s party. I was very upset when I wrote it. And then I had second thoughts and wrote you another. That’s the one I slipped under your door. I’d forgotten about this one.” He gives his head a shake. “I don’t understand. Nothing happened that night. Not between us, anyway. Did someone say something? Was it Max?” His lips thin in anger. “That – “ “No,” I say quickly. “It was nothing Max did.” I let out a breath, and plough forward. “It was something you did. You and Lace. It was when you sneaked off to have sex.” There’s a moment of stunned silence. “What?” “You know what I mean. I saw it all. Well, not all, but I did see the two of disappear through those swinging double doors only the staff used. And when you came back, Lace’s hair was all mussed. And if you didn’t have sex exactly, it was something close. That was really tacky, Peeta. Civilized people have more decorum than to do that. Civilized people wait until they get home. Civilized people – “ “Katniss, we didn’t sneak off for sex. Cass invited me to see the kitchens once the dessert course was over. That’s where we went.” Oh. I guess that’s a reasonable explanation. But that dream had been so vivid. “Then why was Lace’s hair messed up?” “Was it? I don’t know. I don’t remember anything different about her. We went to see the kitchen, Cass showed us around, and then we came out. Nothing else happened.” “But it was sticking out,” I insist. I know what I saw. The scene plays again in my head. I was at the bar with Haymitch and Max, sampling shots of whisky and getting drunker and more agitated by the minute. Agonizing over what they could be doing. Kissing, fondling each other, maybe even fucking. “And then you didn’t even look to see if I was still there when you came back,” I add in a small pitiful voice. It sounds so pathetic, saying it aloud. It’s a trivial reason for cutting someone out of your life. Just because they didn’t look for you when they came into a room. But after everything, that’s what tipped it over for me. What finally made me give up hope and decide to end it. He reaches across the table to take one of my hands. “Katniss, look at me.” I turn my face away, and he gives my hand a tug. I reluctantly meet his gaze. His eyes look earnestly into mine. “I can’t explain the hair, okay? But I can tell you what I do remember about that night.” He pauses, as if waiting for my approval before he proceeds. I shrug. “Go ahead.” He closes his eyes for a few seconds. “You, looking so beautiful in your Cinna dress. And me, assailed by memories of other entrances and other gowns. Being dragged around by Lace from one boring conversation to another, unable to resist looking around to see what you were doing. And Max, who didn’t leave your side for a minute unless it was to get you another drink. I was jealous of him without knowing why but attributed it to a fear of losing your friendship.” He pauses and adds, “At the time, you didn’t seem very happy with me.”I feel a twinge of remorse. He’s right. I was often moody and distant with him. The tape viewings weren’t going as I wanted and I’d recently learned of a pattern book he was making for Lace, similar to my family’s plant book. “You seemed to be having such a good time together, at dinner and on the dance floor. So, when we came back into the ballroom, I just didn’t want to be reminded of it. I kept my head down and headed for the nearest group of people. And then I did my best not to think about you. I’m sorry. I hurt you and used Lace to hide from my feelings. But that’s the truth, awful as it is.” But not nearly as awful as what I’d convinced myself of. I don’t know what to say. I feel so foolish. So much anger and pain for something that existed only in my imagination. And I’d also assumed that Peeta’s willingness to help me with the Marcus thing was due, in some part, to either empathy or guilt for having being in a similar situation himself. “No, I’m the awful one for jumping to conclusions. I thought the worst. You’d never be so crass as to do something like that. I owe you an apology. I should never – “ “You don’t owe me anything,” he says, interrupting me before I can go further. “In fact, the opposite is true. You wouldn’t have thought it if I hadn’t given you reason to.” He reaches across for the memory book and flips through the pages we’ve done so far. My father. Peeta’s father. Boggs. It stops on Rue. Peeta has drawn her poised on her toes, arms slightly extended, like a bird about to take flight. There’s a reason why I asked him to portray her like this. It’s how I want to remember her. You can’t change the past, but you can bring the best of it into the future. “Let’s make a deal. Only good memories for us from now on. Like this book you’re working on.” He walks over to where I’m sitting to pull me out of my chair. “Now come show me where you want this painting hung.” I take him into the living room. It’s the room we use most and where I’ll see it every day. As I decide where to place it exactly, Peeta comes to stand at my back to hug me from behind. I lean back against his broad chest and luxuriate in the strong arms that encircle me. My dandelion in the spring. The lullaby that Prim liked as a baby comes to mind. Here it’s safe, here it’s warmHere the daisies guard you from every harmHere your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them trueHere is the place where I love you. “I was thinking over the mantle? Or maybe on the far wall . . .” ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Chapter 38 Lace’s story: what happened on the night of the mayor’s party. It wasn’t fair! This was supposed to have been her night. She had been looking forward to it for weeks ever since Peeta casually mentioned it on one of their date nights. The mayor’s inauguration party was to be the biggest social event in District 12 in living memory. All the important and influential people in the district would be there. For ambitious Lace, it was invaluable in terms of creating contacts and securing the kind of clientele that could afford to buy her evening wear, a design niche she wanted to develop. Besides, she dearly loved a party and she hadn’t been to one in ages. The last one had been the district party where she had met Peeta for the first time. He didn’t remember it though. That was fortunate since she had come to District 12 for a new life and a new identity and didn’t want her past in District 8 compromising it in any way. Since she was to be her best advertisement, she put a great deal of thought and effort into her gown. She hadn’t much money saved but she splurged the lot on pale yellow satin and then spent many hours making it up. The final touch was a trip to the salon to have her hair colored and styled. It was an extravagance, keeping up the hair color. But she loved it and it formed something of a disguise as it was subtly different from the typical ash brown of the natives of her home district. As she entered the ballroom, Lace felt she was at the beginning of an exciting new phase. After a slow start, her business had gained momentum and she was making a steady income. A few family members had also made the move to 12 which added to her sense of security. But best of all, was the man on whose arm she clung. How did she get so lucky? Peeta Mellark! Her teenage crush. The romantic heartthrob whose posters had adorned her bedroom wall. The boy she had married in her dreams every night. What a fortuitus twist of fate it had been that day when he came into her shop to have a coat made. A flirtation had led to a date at a restaurant and then another, until she could now, without exaggeration, call him her boyfriend! True, he wasn’t quite what she had expected. He seemed a bit aimless, and he liked activities she had outgrown, like hanging out at the ice-cream parlor and the swimming pool, but he was Peeta Mellark! And he really was so sweet and considerate with his little romantic gestures and compliments to her beauty. He told her she was a wonder. And the more she kissed and flattered and stroked, the more wonderful she became. It was a mutual admiration society that she was more than happy to live in. The one blot on her happiness was Katniss Everdeen. Lace had mixed feelings about meeting her. Katniss was intimidating. Her reputation as romantic heroine, fearless symbol of the Rebellion, skillful warrior and (privately thought by most of the populace) savior from another Snow, preceded her. But most intimidating of all was her relationship with Peeta. He talked about her all the time. Not in a romantic sense, it was true, but it was clear she occupied a great deal of his thoughts. The Games had been mandatory viewing and Lace, like everyone in Panem, had watched Peeta gaze at Katniss with love in his eyes. But Peeta had an explanation for that. It had been an illusion. He thought he had been in love with her, but it turned out that he was in love with his idea of her, rather than who she really is. But now he thought of her as very good friend with whom he shared an unbreakable bond. As for Katniss, well, she had never loved him. It had all been an act on her part. That should have been reassuring. And it was. Sort of. But Peeta had lost many of his memories and what was left was distorted, so how could he be certain? But what gave her most pause wasn’t Peeta. It was Katniss. It was clear at the first meeting that Katniss didn’t like her. Katniss wasn’t rude, but she was cool, even giving her the once over when they were first introduced. And when Lace and Peeta discussed a housewarming gift from the two of them for Lace’s brother, a shadow passed over Katniss’s face. It was subtle but unmistakable. Katniss wasn’t as disinterested in Peeta as Peeta made out. That’s why Lace gatecrashed the tape viewings. If there was anything going on, she wanted to know about it. She didn’t trust Katniss one inch. Unfortunately, the second of the tapes triggered the memory of a traumatic incident for Lace and she reacted hysterically. Peeta asked her not to attend anymore and she had no choice but to do as he said. However, despite Peeta watching video tape of hugs and kisses and romantic slow dancing at Capitol parties, nothing changed between herself and Peeta. If Peeta had ever loved Katniss, it appeared that he no longer did. Even Leevy’s revelations in the salon that day didn’t worry her for long. So what if the star-crossed lovers had been real? It still aligned with Peeta’s version. What had happened in the Games and during the tours was before Peeta had realized his true feelings for Katniss. And she’d already guessed that Katniss was in love with him. The party was everything Lace had dreamed of. So elegant. The women in evening gowns, the men in dinner suits. Waiters with silver trays laden with flutes of sparkling champagne. The tables resplendent with starched white tablecloths and napkins and gleaming cutlery. She turned to Peeta to kiss his cheek. “Thank you so much for bringing me,” she said. “You really are the best boyfriend.” He brushed her lips with his and gave her a fond smile. “Only because I have the best girlfriend,” he replied. She beamed and squeezed his arm. She could hardly recall a happier moment. And then Katniss Everdeen arrived. Lace’s practiced eye immediately recognized her gown as haute couture. Cinna, probably. Deep blue, the bodice studded thickly with diamonds – were they real? – with a strapless sweetheart neckline and more diamonds scattered on the skirt. It dazzled and Katniss dazzled with it. Luxuriant dark hair cascading down her back in loose curls. Smooth olive skin, fine features and those surprising eyes. Silvery gray, the colour of storm clouds. She had a man for each arm. The school teacher Max Matson, who all the girls agreed was very good looking if you could get past his personality, and – it couldn’t be – Arthur! Lace’s friend who adored her since they were children together. She knew he was coming tonight but not with her! She felt the arm beneath her fingers stiffen and her glance swiftly turned to his face. Peeta appeared stunned, his mouth gaping slightly. There was admiration, certainly, but also something darker and more sinister. Recognition. A memory, perhaps several, had resurfaced. Lace’s happiness dimmed as if a cloud had passed across the sun. But she rallied, pulling Peeta quickly along to greet the new mayor and his wife who were momentarily on their own. Lace was in her element. She was a natural networker. She loved to interact with people and was always searching for opportunities. Peeta seemed a little distracted though. Looking around, not quite keeping up with the conversation. She followed his gaze, and it led directly to Katniss Everdeen, who, no surprise, was looking directly at him. They both looked quickly away, but that was of no comfort. It was clear that they were on each other’s mind. Meanwhile, she was pleased to observe, Arthur had detached himself from Katniss and was busy working the room too. Now there was a man with get-up-and-go. He didn’t let his natural reserve get in the way of achieving his ambitions. Lace waved him over and he changed direction to come to her side. Soon they were talking business, a fascinating subject for them both. She didn’t notice how restless Peeta was during the exchange. Dinner was announced and everyone made their way to their allocated seats. Unfortunately, theirs was a dull table and not even Lace’s pearly laugh could liven it up. A burst of laughter from nearby grabbed her attention. Arthur and Haymitch seemed to be at the center of it. It caught Peeta’s attention too. He seemed envious, it appeared to Lace. But whether it was over the entertaining company or because Katniss was seated there too, she couldn’t tell. After the food had been served, people resumed their mingling, moving from table to table. Peeta wanted to talk to Katniss. Ordinarily, Lace wouldn’t feel particularly threatened by this. Over the preceding weeks, Peeta had confided to her that Katniss seemed uninterested in spending time with him unless it was watching the tapes. And even then, she often seemed angry with him. Lace immediately guessed the situation. Katniss had grown frustrated with Peeta. He hadn’t responded as she’d hoped and she was distancing herself as a form of self-protection. As long as this status quo was maintained, Lace felt safe. But after tonight, she wasn’t sure of anything. Lace demurred. Perhaps it wasn’t a good idea. Katniss appeared occupied and hadn’t he told her that she didn’t seem keen on his company lately? It was best to leave her alone. But Peeta said that they should, that it would look odd if they didn’t. So, when Max headed off in the direction of the bar, leaving Katniss on her own, Lace reluctantly let Peeta lead her to where Katniss sat. It was an awkward conversation. Lace embarrassed herself with her ignorance on what it meant to be a victor at the district parties and having to face the families of the dead tributes. Worse, she let it slip that she had been to a district party. Her story was that she’d been a factory worker in 8. Factory workers weren’t allowed to attend district parties. Fortunately, Peeta didn’t pick up on it, but Katniss appeared to sense that something was amiss. There was an awkward pause. Peeta broke the silence. “Are you going to let me talk to Katniss?” he said to Lace, pretending to be annoyed. She had intended to stay at Peeta’s side, but perhaps it would be better to leave before she dug herself a deeper hole. “Okay, okay,” she said, in mock surrender. “I know when I’m not wanted. I need to go to the ladies’ room anyway. Just stay out of trouble and don’t bug Katniss.” There, that would show Katniss who’s really in charge and hopefully plant a seed that Peeta wasn’t exactly happy in her company either. She stroked his hand and kissed his cheek, enjoying her Svengali-like effect, knowing that his eyes would follow her as she walked away. She went to the ladies’ room as she said she would and did the usual things women do there. She wanted to get the timing right and was gratified to see Peeta waiting for her at their table when she returned. The dancing started up soon after and Lace pulled Peeta to his feet. She loved to dance. Peeta didn’t. His prosthetic leg made it a chore rather than a pleasure and he had faint memories of dancing at Capitol parties. But he wanted to be a good boyfriend, so up he got, and shuffled dutifully around the dancefloor with her. But then Katniss and Max came into view. Max had Katniss pulled tightly against him and he swung her around in a series of fancy turns, almost lifting her off her feet. They were making fools of themselves, thought Lace. That’s no way to behave at a formal event. So undignified! So tasteless! She turned to Peeta, expecting him to be as unimpressed as she, but his face was hard, giving away nothing. Suddenly, he put his head close to hers and whispered words in her ear. She nodded and followed him through the double swinging doors the staff used to bring food from the kitchen. It had been pre-arranged. Peeta had told her about it. Cass from the bakery was to show Peeta around the kitchens. He had never seen a commercial kitchen before. While he marveled at the long row of ovens, the walk-in freezer, the huge storage room, Lace could barely stifle her yawns. So boring, and it was fricking cold in there after the warmth of the ballroom. But she stuck a smile on her face and did her best to appear interested but she was hardly in the mood to hear about the merits of blast chillers when her heart was breaking. Somehow, she had to widen the gulf between Katniss and Peeta. She had to ensure that any fledgling signs of a possible reunion between them was snuffed out before it could begin. And then she had an idea. Just as they were about to re-enter the ballroom, Lace ruffled her carefully styled hair and swiped the back of her hand across her mouth to wipe away some of the lipstick, smearing it a little. Let Katniss believe that she and Peeta had snuck away for some canoodling in a dark corner. Isn’t that what Peeta and Katniss did as star-crossed lovers? Sneaking off to be alone when they were at fancy events? It was in a fan magazine she’d read, anyway. With a bit of luck, Katniss’s mind would go straight there. She scanned the room and saw Katniss by the bar with Max and Haymitch. The hour was growing late and the crowd had thinned but there was a group of merry young people standing around nearby. She started to lead Peeta in their direction, but he seemed to have the same idea and led her. And when his arm went around her waist and he pressed a fond kiss to the crown of her head, relief flooded through her. Everything was as it should be. She turned in his arms slightly to look over his shoulder and managed to catch a glimpse of Katniss’s stricken but resolute face, just before her hasty exit with a startled Max close behind her. Satisfied, she leaned her head against Peeta’s shoulder and he squeezed her waist. She had worried over nothing. It was inevitable that as Peeta regained his memories they’d be focused on Katniss. They were, after all, the memories that Snow had meddled with. It didn’t mean that Peeta was wrong when he said his feelings for her had been an illusion. The real proof of who he loved was in who he chose to be with. And that was her, Lace Bomul from District 8.

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nekoabiwrites · 5 years ago

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Battle Bonds

Ahhh! It feels so good to be back and writing again! Panto was great fun and I’m kinda missing it but also, I’m so happy to not have to watch the same show 60 times anymore...

Anyway, this fic was inspired by a freaking adorable piece of art by @artistictaurean with Roman and a lil cute Swablu: https://artistictaurean.tumblr.com/post/190329454010/holy-crap-i-actually-finished-something-just-a Mega thanks to them for not only being super talented at making such darn cute art, but also for being chill with me writing this (even tho I was on anon asking but mehhhhhh details)

AU: None Pairing: None Words: 2644 Warnings: Remus and Deceit are in here. Anything else, please let me know!

Summary: Thomas has been on a bit of a pokemon kick recently and it has affected his imagination more than he would ever think of...

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Due to the recent release and information about new titles in the Pokemon franchise, Thomas had been thinking about and playing a lot of the series – much to Logan’s dismay. It had just been something he was doing, not once did Thomas even give a thought to how his gaming habit would affect his sides.

Roman lightly chewed on the end of his pencil as he tried to work out the perspective of the next detail to his sketch. It was rare to have all of the sides in the imagination with him after all, even more so that it was for social reasons rather than important ones. He dropped his head and added detail to the figure of Logan in his artwork, doing everything to capture the bewildered expression that was currently resting on the logical side’s features and the open book in his hands.

The prince couldn’t fault Logan for this, as he could hear the excited squeals of Patton off to his left as he discovered yet another new species that he didn’t realise existed.

“IT’S A PUPPY!” The paternal side yelled, holding Rockruff high above his head in order to show it off to the others. An amused snort and swishing of grass told Roman that Virgil was heading towards Patton to get a closer look at the small animal.

Time passed leisurely as the cycle of Patton finding new species, calling out that he found a new one and then being told which pokemon it was continued to repeat itself, all while Roman continued sketching. Eventually, Patton and Virgil settled down in view of Roman, allowing him to finally add them to his piece. Then there was an odd breeze that ruffled his hair and a weight was added to the top of his head.

Roman dropped his sketchpad and held his arms up, yelping loudly in surprise. He knew deep down it was fruitless to try, but his instinct was to attempt to look up and see what was perched upon his head.

Another Patton squeal had Roman freezing in place. The moral side jogged on up to Roman and coo’d at the creature on his head, “It’s so fluffy and – Oh! – It’s just like a cloud, and its so soft! Virgil, Logan! What’s this one?!”

“If memory serves, it is a swablu, Patton.” Logan approached, flipping the pages. It took seconds for him to find what he was looking for and he began to read aloud, “It is a primary normal type with a secondary flying type that was introduced in the third generation. Its category is the cotton bird pokemon. According to several entries in the pokedex of various games, swablus are very concerned with cleanliness and enjoy perching upon the heads of people.”

“I thought you didn’t care about this stuff?” Virgil asked slyly, gently brushing a finger along the tops of the swablu’s fluffy wings.

Logan flushed slightly and cleared his throat, “I do not recall saying that I didn’t care about it. I was simply attempting to get Thomas to understand that playing such a game for long periods of time is unproductive and-”

“I was just messing with ya, Logan. It’s okay.” Virgil snorted and rolled his eyes good-naturedly.

Roman was remaining fairly motionless as the others fawned over the pokemon perched upon his head. After getting confirmation on what pokemon it was, he’d regained his composure, sure that there was little to no threat. The prince reached up to pet the extremely friendly pokemon, feeling the cloud-like wings for the first time while also bringing the attention back down to himself with an exaggerated clearing of his throat. “Not that I mind being surrounded by attention, but my art was almost completed and now you have all moved from your positions. I place the blame upon you all if this turns out absolutely horrendous.” He gestured to the forgotten sketchbook resting in the grass.

Shortly after Roman had begun yet another round of bantering back and forth with Virgil and Logan, Patton saw a new pokemon that excited him, and he ran off. Virgil trailed behind, watching with amusement. Logan eventually moved in the same direction once Patton called for him yet again. Roman was now alone with the creature atop his head.

He summoned a floating mirror before himself and saw the blue bird for the first time. It looked to be starting to dose off, clearly comfortable in its position. The royal reached up again and gently stroked the bird, who seemed pleased with the gentle attention as it chirped in response. “How do you like the name Alto?” Roman asked rhetorically. The swablu perked up and flew in a small circle, just above Roman’s head, before seating itself again and almost nuzzling into the creative side’s hair. “I’ll have to take that as a yes.”

It wasn’t long until the hype died down and Thomas went back to his usual level of enjoyment of the series. This meant that if the sides wanted to keep all the random pokemon, Roman would have had to start working extremely hard to keep them all around. Thankfully, Patton wasn’t going to push his fellow side like that, and they all compromised on only keeping certain pokemon that they’d all become attached to – mostly due to the fact that their attachments would take some of the strain off of the creative side.

Out in the dirt courtyard of the castle located near the entrance to the imagination, Roman had placed a battling area for the pokemon, giving all of them a place to battle in a regulated, enclosed space.

“Servine is unable to battle.” Patton called out, “All three of Deceit’s pokemon have fainted! Roman wins! Yay Roman!” The moral side applauded, causing the Lillipup currently resting in his lap to yap alongside.

Roman laughed heartily, “Of course I won. What were you thinking, putting your grass type out against my superior flying type?” Alto soared over to rest upon Roman’s head, allowing her trainer to give her well earned scritches.

Deceit rolled his eyes, “It was because I have no knowledge of typing and most definitely had nothing to do with the fact I only had one pokemon left and therefore had no other options.” As he spoke, he returned the pokemon to its pokeball

“Now Deceit, be nice…” Patton chastised.

“Apologies.” Deceit sarcastically responded before stalking off to who knew where.

Patton went to say something to Roman, but was cut off by the creative side, “It’s quite alright, Patton. Not even the attitude from a slippery snake can dampen my mood!”

“Well, good! Let’s heal everyone up before the final match!” Patton hopped up from his cross-legged position on the ground and took Roman off to the side. Instead of battling on his own, Patton had taken the role of judge and healer. He found it was far more rewarding to help the fainted and injured pokemon than be the reason why they were hurt in the first place. Due to the fairly decisive victory, Roman’s pokemon took very little time to heal.

“There you go! All better now!” Patton handed the pokeballs back over to Roman, who replaced them back into their places on his belt. The moral side then looked around and bit his lip a little in worry, “I’m sorry, kiddo… but I need to go and find out where Dee went. Are you alright to wait just a little longer?”

“Of course he is!” came a third excited voice, who made both sides jump with his sudden presence and arms over their shoulders.

Roman’s smile fell and he sighed heavily, “I hate to admit this… but, for once, my brother is right… It’s more than fine for you to attend to business, Patton.”

“If you require a moderator, I am free to fulfil that role in Patton’s absence.” Logan cut in.

“Ooo! Yes! Let’s murder both of these birds with the stone!” Remus gleefully clapped his hands and hopped in place, whilst the other sides simply agreed to Logan’s proposition.

The two sides of creativity took a spot at each end of the field, staring each other down; Roman with a hardened glare that aimed to strike fear in his brother, Remus with his signature unhinged grin and twitching fingers hovering just over the balls resting against his side.

“The usual format and rules apply. Three pokemon per user, first to have all three faint is the loser. Are we agreed on this?” Logan called out. Both of the participants nodded. “Let the battle commence!”

Roman tossed out his first ball, summoning his precious swablu onto the field. Both looked as determined as the other. Remus, on the opposite side, released his first pokemon and everyone in attendance immediately grimaced.

“What in the heck is that thing?!” Roman yelled.

“It’s an Arctozolt! Isn’t he just a precious little monster?” Remus coo’d, making kissy faces at the abomination before him.

Logan’s eyes darted between the two for a moment, clearly having knowledge that Roman did not. The prince was going to ask what had the logical side looking as though he was nervous for him but decided against it. Instead, he steeled his resolve.

“Alto, Cotton Guard!”

Using her wings, Alto managed to surround her entire body in layers of almost invisible cotton, using it almost as a shield against anything that would attack her. She then seemed to brace herself, watching the pokemon before her carefully.

“Thundershock!”

Time seemed to stop for a second as Roman heard the command. He hadn’t even considered the fact that Arctozolt had the type advantage, especially since he’d never seen it before. Now that he was helpless to do much other than stare, Roman managed to notice the thunderbolt-like growths on the pokemon’s top half and that it was shivering, which may indicate that it was also partially ice type. His thoughts were cut short as Alto screeched in pain as the electric attack hit her square on.

“Alto!” Roman cried out. He watched as the swablu dropped in the air slightly but managed to catch herself before hitting the floor. He let out a soft sigh of relief, “Shake it off and use Round!”

Alto did just that, physically shaking her body to clear herself of the shock before soaring in circles for a few seconds, ending up heading directly for Arctozolt, hitting it square in the chest. The odd pokemon recoiled slightly after the hit, but still seemed to be feeling alright. The same could not be said for Roman as he saw the smile on his brother’s face grow even larger.

“Arctie, use Avalanche!”

Once again, Roman cursed himself internally. “Alto, avoid as much as you can!” He called out, trying his best to get his beloved swablu to not take as much damage as humanly possible.

It was effective somewhat as Alto did avoid several hits, but it always put her in the path of another part of the attack. Overall, it was a severe hit and Alto’s energy seemed to be waning as she was taking far more effort in order to keep herself in the air. Thankfully, the cotton that surrounded her body did help in staving off some of the damage.

Racking his brain, Roman tried to think of the best way to win the battle that seemed almost completely impossible.

“What’s wrong, brother?” Remus jeered from the opposite side of the field, “Having problems?”

Roman glared harshly at Remus before issuing another command, “Alto, sing!”

Alto responded immediately. She swooped in to hang in the air just a short distance from Arctozolt and began to sing a soft melody, attempting to put the creature to sleep. However, before it could really take effect, Remus called out for Arctozolt to use another move.

“Use Echoed Voice!”

The abomination began to screech loudly, the sound causing most everyone in the surrounding area to cover their ears. Alto drifted backwards, clearly in pain from the hit to her senses, her song being cut short. She began to float downwards towards the ground, looking as though she were about to admit defeat. She turned slightly and was able to notice Roman staring at her, worry coursing through him. Her eyes started to shut as she fell closer and closer to the ground.

“Alto, no!”

Her body touched the ground for a brief second before erupting in a flash of light. Yet again, everyone in attendance flinched and avoided using one of their senses until the light died down.

Remus’ grin dropped completely off of his face as his mouth fell open once he’d caught sight of where Alto had once been.

In place of the small round fluffy-winged bird was a far larger version. Its neck extended upwards, causing her to look far more intimidating as she could look down upon him and its cloud like wings curled around its lower body, looking as though the wings were what made up the creature instead. Just behind, his brother was also as shocked.

“Uh Logan. Information please!”

“Alto evolved into her final stage, that being an Altaria. Her typing has now changed, becoming a primary dragon type with the same secondary flying type as its pre-evolved state.” Logan offered.

“That has to be cheating! That’s his second pokemon now, right?!” Remus pouted, stamping his foot like an angry child.

“Not at all. Evolution is a natural process of the pokemon species as a whole and it cannot be timed, at least in the case of the majority of evolutions. In terms of our ruleset, it is the amount of fainted pokemon that provide us with the final result. As Alto has only evolved and is, in fact, still very much present and aware, it still counts as Roman’s first pokemon.” Logan side-eyed the moustached side as he explained.

Roman was still a little surprised but was more than ready to fight back with his now larger cloud bird. Something in him just knew that Alto had learned something new, so he acted without much thought, “Alto! Dragon Breath!”

Alto reared back as she took in a large breath, physically puffing herself up in preparation. She stared straight ahead at the Arctozolt before letting the blue flames pour from her beak, engulfing the odd creature entirely. Remus also yelped and attempted to shield himself as the edges of the attack came close to reaching his position. The flames dissipated after a moment and Arctozolt seemed to be wobbling back and forth slightly before it fell over and was removed from the competition.

After two more quick battles, Roman was declared the victor of the small tournament and Remus went off to lick his wounds – everyone was sure that wasn’t just a turn of phrase when it came to the intrusive side. Patton returned shortly after the match and was more than a little enamoured with the giant cloud bird. Shortly after, the sides returned to their jobs and things went back to normal.

Later in the evening, Patton headed back into the imagination to call Roman for dinner, since he was nowhere to be found in the regular mindscape.

“Roman? Where are you? Dinner’s ready!” Patton called out into the distance as he wandered around the edge of the castle. He rounded a corner and had to clamp a hand over his mouth in order to muffle a happy squeal.

Alto was sleeping soundly, resting at the base of a tree on the edges of the forest. Curled up in her cloud-like wings was the figure of Roman. Evidently, he’d tired himself out and Alto had offered her soft wings as a base for him to nap. Patton quietly headed back, making a mental note to put Roman’s plate in the fridge for when he woke up.

---

My other stuff: http://nekoabi.tumblr.com/myworks Mobile Accessible Masterlist: http://nekoabi.tumblr.com/post/181954641376/fic-masterlist

General Tag List: @not-so-innocent-bi-sander @didsomeonesayprince @llamaly @justanotherpurplebutterfly @iaminmultiplefandoms @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @lowkeyvirgilobsessed @louisthewarlock @fangsandrainbows @xxladystarlightxx @sleepyssnail @ao-koshka @notalwaysthevillian @pumpkinminette @doces-e--tuga @coloursintheblur @safesandersides @hogwarts-my-love

#Sanders Sides #Fanfiction #Pokemon #Roman Sanders #Remus Sanders #Virgil Sanders #Patton Sanders #Logan Sanders #Deceit Sanders #Thomas Sanders #Creativity Sanders #Anxiety Sanders #Morality Sanders #Logic Sanders

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syncogon · 5 years ago

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sad only 480p version this time, and delayed. oh well, temptation too strong, and clips on the weibo looked promising, so let’s go

mjy sighhh i guess he’s just dumb not malicious but man

“the truth isn’t important” glasses shing. oh wow that hair swish tho that was like unnecessarily well animated hahaha

iiiii just want jhx to tell off yy!! i think that’d be great, what a faceslap! also wtf is this thing? iron supplements?? a spray? icy-hot? 铁打损伤喷雾?? god i spent like five minutes trying to mouse-trace those characters and i still don’t know if this is supposed to be significant or if it’s just significant that jhx caught yy doing shady shit

anyway given music / context it seems jhx is annoyed at what yy is doing? so yay friggin finally. “our classes aren’t at nanhua” nice

“xu-da” vs “xu-ge” hmm. anyway jhx don’t fall for the lies. jhx is like sx, annoying and chuuni but probably isn’t as obnoxiously awful as he first appears... probably.... maybe.

goddd sucks that the full version of this op is kinda weird, because i LOVE this op so much like holy crap. jiyi bei yingfu huanxing....

man now im like stressed about the yf at the airport scene. trailer showed an airport. what’s gonna happennn

this exchange about dd feels so weird like it sounds like ctg is trying to explain they’re not in any pre-relationship or smth but maggie is like “i don’t mind” in a way that makes it sound like she wouldn’t mind if they’re together? what??? but whatever

ok i really enjoy this cr/yf dynamic. like i feel like it’s a bit ooc and yf as portrayed here is maybe too far on the acquiescence but also it’s really funny and sparks joy for me so i’ll buy it. i’m happy to see like established relationship stuff i think bc i generally don’t in the stuff i watch. speaking of which i’m super glad that they didn’t make the awful dumb move of trying to insert like Another wack love triangle drama dynamic thing in this like the fans want yecong and tianmai!!

wowwww it’s so nice how supportive cr is being tho like i love to see it!

handholding!! soft!! nice inversion of the earlier part where cr is bandaging his fingers. but like -

WHY DOES SHE HAVE MARKS/CALLUSES ON HER THUMB AND NOT HER PINKY??? like ok i have not played ukelele but i sure have my own share of stringed instrument finger calluses and you don’t?? press on the string with your thumb???

still, they’re trying, it’s a cute detail, i appreciate it. i liked that one wwgk review i watched yesterday that pointed out s1 was like a coming of age story disguised as a music story, whereas s2 is like a real music story....

wait this is incredibly cute wtf. oh my god.

YF SIGHED/FACEPALMED AT THAT? COME ON!! WTF THAT’S SO RUDE? THAT WAS ACTUALLY LIKE PRETTY GOOD?? AND SHE DID THIS JUST FOR YOU? like maybe not performance ready but bro she’s learned for two days!! also holy shit the strumming animation is really good for smth like this im impressed! that reminds me of the like actually legit violin animation they showed in the trailer yo im so ready

like i totally understand the frustration (damn, maggie’s face... 3 free performances? really?) but also i feel SO BAD FOR CR HERE this is so awkward oh my godddd at least ctg like tries to apologize to her (and cr’s reaction to this whole thing is also v solid, good for her) but still like damn

aww ahh man im glad maggie still like! supports encourages cr here! that’s also char dev being able to like get past her own complicated emotions at least for this sort of gesture

awwww i also like seeing maggie’s coping, the happiness philosophy i always thought that was super interesting. she’s a great char! and i think running is good

animators animate a girl running normally challenge

oh nice you have to walk a bit after sprinting, good

the train track scenes are so pretty wahhh

does... does the track just end there? what

the ~significance~ of maggie now sharing this piece of her that used to be a yf thing, with ctg

also excellent bgm - oh omg it’s og soul link remix!!!

“i don’t want you to go”

MY GOD HE’S FINALLY MAKING A REAL MOVE. and one based in real friendship. GOD FUCKING FINALLY CTG AAAAAA she’s cryyying man this exchange is also pretty cute ngl

i can’t believe they figured this out a full 4 episodes before the finale

this is so pretty here wahhhhhh i wanna ss the whole thing in 1080p

awhhhhhh

they never released pink twilight shanghai!! i want this ver!!!

aww yayyy open still cheering her on - YF BE NICE TO YOUR GF COME ON

haha this is like reverse of cr tutoring him - WAIT YEAH YF YOU WERE A SHITTY ASS STUDENT COMPARED TO HER BE EXTRA NICE

also remixed dream i dig it! sounds like new lyrics?

julliard hahahaha

dong dong goddess

HAHAHA did dd just steal ctg’s fries

ctg: expressing some deep thoughts

me: just watching dd

“forever confident, forever happy”

wait sooooooo are they a thing now or what did that count as a confession

“and qing’er is finally here” WHAT’S THE TEAAAAA WE STILL DON’T REALLY KNOW

“im a guitarist this is fine” YOU GO DD I LOVE YOU

BEACH EPISODE BEACH EPISODE BEACH EPISODE

omg oyzq. you’d think they were trying to extort a confession from him. what the hell is this instrument he said what is a xiao 箫. A WOODEN FLUTE? YOOO THAT’S COOL my god PLEASE let us get some kickass trad/modern fusion music im so ready

“i trust ouyang” ahhh double char surnames are cool

HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK

“because i’m about to have surgery on my knee” REALLY? REALLY? IS THIS REALLY HOW YOU’RE GOING TO JUSTIFY ALL THIS? FOLKS I AM LOSING MY SHIT I HAVEN’T LAUGHED OUT LOUD LIKE THIS IN SO LONG

ok this is interesting tho he’s not a dick for the hell of it it’s out of desperation or smth. but like half a year, oh no, what a horror. (i’m fresh out of hb feels ok you shaddap // tho i can also imagine the knife, like in lotus bloom, where they didn’t think szp’s injury was permanent). tho i do also like the “then we’ll be seniors we won’t have time to perform” but also that’s just a reminder that all of these ppl are like frigging 16 year olds and i still cannot take this seriously

i like “i didn’t expect, that i couldn’t give you the confidence to win”. god im so glad this confrontation is happening. man this feels like a wrap up already are they really spending all 3 last episodes on the competition? what’s the story gonna be?

feel like he’d be less ugly with hairstyle that looked more consistently like this. anyway sucks that both of them are so ugly otherwise there’s some nice sun/moon (+stars?) imagery you can get going here

GROUP CHAT GROUP CHAT GROUP CHAT

pretty! i wanna save this hq

it’s this bgm!!! godd i just want this track so bad

an empty beach?? in china near shanghai???

anyway ahhh it’s the iconic beach shot! i like how the promo ver cuts out dd lmfao

wow nine episodes in and cookie finally gets a character moment??? cookieeeeeeee i missed you

ok i can’t ship them he calls her shifu but also THIS IS SUCH A CUTE FRIENDSHIP calling every day 10 minutes?? wow!! i love dongdong and i love cookie. also this hits different in covid times “no one says that we can’t be friends because of distance”

oh i guess they are pushing this as a ship. meh.

wahhhhh. need this hq then i have more propic material.

HE HAS COVID

ah lang is VIBING oh to be the ah lang of my own life. parasurfing. walking into poles.

wow this is so modern! the red bag thing! wow i do love this show flexing the modern-ness

this is the mercedes benz arena im SURE of it ahhhh holy crap this crowd. oh to be in a crowd without mask

IT’S THIS DUDE AGAIN like the trailer spoiled this but if i found out this right here right now i would’ve lost my shit my god hahhaah

im like torn about how i feel about cr’s dress like idk if it fits her well even if it’s pretty

oh im scared i hope this doesn’t become embarrassing

OMG THEY INCLUDED PENCIL SKETCH OF THAT S1 SCENE. HAHAHA. char growth yayyyyy

ok anyway im happy!! spent like an hour watching this or something lmao but good times!! much better than last ep HAHA yayyy im so glad we’re finally at the comp and lots of these little things have been tied up now im ready for new song drops!!!

#music up #mine #synco talks

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capcarolsdanver · 6 years ago

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Crush

Request: I also have an idea for Kate x r: r is new at school and is kind of adopted by the friend group, starts crushing on kate, is super sad tho bc r assumes kate is straight and hooking up with whatever guy and closes herself off from kate, until kate realises what's going on and how she feels about r and goes on to confront r…

Pairing: Kate x Reader

A/N: Sorry for the long wait!! This week I had absolutely no motivation and every time I sat down to write nothing was coming to me. It’s the worst when I really want to write my requests for you guys as quickly as I can but I literally feel stuck and so uninspired to write sometimes. As always, feedback is appreciated!

Requests are still temporarily closed!!

(gif originally posted by @dianas-shortgalpal)

You sit down at an empty table in the dining hall with your breakfast. You arrived at Tanner Hall late the previous day, and so you still haven’t really met any of your fellow classmates. You don’t mind, having been kind of a loner at your previous school, so you open the book you brought with you while you eat your breakfast.

People start to fill the other tables in the dining hall and it’s not too long after that you hear a voice.

“Hey.” You look up towards the voice and see two girls sitting at the table next to you. They both wear friendly smiles on their faces. “You’re new here?”

“I am, yeah,” you reply. The girls share a quick silent look before turning back to you.

“Why don’t you come sit over here with us?” The girl with the dark brown hair says. You look at them in surprise. “If you want to,” she adds on after a moment of silence.

“Yeah,” you nod, closing your book and grabbing your tray to sit opposite the girls.

“My name is Y/N by the way,” you say with a smile as you sit.

“I’m Fernanda, but I prefer Fern. This is Lucasta,” the girl with the darker hair replies.

“Feel free to call me Lu, though. It’s nice to me you,” the other girl smiles at you. The three of you sit and talk for a little while, getting to know each other a little bit and chatting about your old school before a blonde haired girl drops into the chair next to you, startling you.

“God, messing with Mr Middlewood is so much fun,” she chuckles. Fern and Lu laugh and both roll their eyes at their friend.

“Yeah, I don’t think yesterday’s whole shower thing will be forgotten any time soon,” Fern says and the blonde laughs. She seems to suddenly realise that her group of friends has an additional member as she faces you and lets her eyes look you over.

“And who do we have here?”

“Oh, this is Y/N! She’s new,” Lu introduces you.

“Well I’m Kate. It’s nice to meet you.” She says and holds her hand out towards you. You get lost for a moment staring back into her eyes before you realise what you’re doing, quickly taking her hand in yours to shake it.

“Yes. Right. Uh, nice to meet you too,” you manage to stutter out and Kate smirks at you as she releases your hand.

“So anyway, what did you do to Middlewood now?” Lu asks and Kate chuckles.

“Nothing more than usual. It’s just too easy to get a reaction from him.” She looks over to where you sit, still trying to shake off whatever you’ve been feeling since Kate sat down next to you. She looks down at your tray and points at the blueberry muffin you’ve left untouched.

“Were you gonna eat that?” You shake your head and push the tray a little towards her.

“It’s all yours.” Kate smiles at you and picks up the muffin. Somewhere in the background you’re aware that Fern and Lu are speaking, but you lose the ability to focus on anything else as you watch Kate’s fingers peeling the muffin liner off, and you can’t help but watch as she breaks off a piece of the muffin and brings it to her mouth.

You snap yourself out of the daydream you’ve found yourself to rejoin the conversation.

“We can hang out in mine and Fern’s room tonight,” Lu says. “Y/N, you can come hang out too.” You agree and shyly smile. It felt good to finally know you had people who seemed to like having you around.

------------------------

It’s been a few weeks and you’re amazed at how you’ve managed to become such close friends with these girls already.

It’s become routine for you and your friends to hang out most nights after you were all done with your school work. Kate often brings her work with her to hang out with you or one of your other friends beforehand, saying she gets too bored working on her own, and you always let her, glad to be able to spend time with her.

Victoria also likes to show up when you’re all hanging out. You wouldn’t mind if it weren’t for the jabs she’d always throw at Fern and the fact that Lu and Kate seem thrilled by every stupid idea she comes up with. You and Fern always shoot each other glances when she’s talking about doing whatever rebellious act she’s come up with.

You sit by the windowsill and watch Kate apply makeup to Fern’s face while Lu sketches at her desk. Kate leans back to look at Fern and nods in approval.

“Hey, Y/N. Come over here,” she calls to you and you hesitate slightly before standing and walking over to where Kate’s rummaging through her makeup bag. “I think this colour will go great with your eyes.” She grabs out an eyeliner pencil and steps closer to you.

“Get used to this. She does it a lot,” Fern laughs as she moves to sit on her bed. You try to laugh too, despite the internal panic you feel when Kate gently grabs your face with her hand to steady you.

You try to keep your breathing even and hope that Kate doesn’t notice your increased heart rate as she finishes with the eyeliner. She puts the eyeliner down and leans back, smiling at you as her eyes study your face.

“Okay I was right. You look hot.” You feel your cheeks immediately burn and you try to duck your head. Kate picks up some lipstick and holds it out for you. “Now put this on.”

“Don’t you think that’s a bit much?” You mumble and Kate rolls her eyes playfully at you.

“Oh, please. Live a little, won’t you?” She steadies your face with her hand again and looks down to your lips as she applies the colour to them. When she’s done, her eyes stay on your lips for a moment before they look back up into yours.

“There,” she speaks softly and you’re not sure if you imagine the shy expression on her face and the tension that fills the air between the two of you. “You look beautiful.”

Before you can respond, Victoria barges into the room and successfully ruins whatever moment you think could have been happening between you and Kate.

“Kate, pass me that lip colour. I’m going to get the school key from Peter today so I have to look my best.”

“Wait, you were serious about that?” Fern questions as Kate hands her the lipstick.

“Of course I was. We’ve got to have a little fun and rebellion while we’re here, don’t we?” You and the other girls all look between each other, and when she’s met with silence, Victoria looks up from the mirror and raises her eyebrows at you with an exasperated look.

“Come on.” She smirks at Kate and steps closer to her. “Kate. It’s your senior year. Surely you want to have a little fun, right?” It only takes a few seconds before Kate is nodding and grinning in Victoria’s direction.

“Yeah, if you get the key we’ll go.” Victoria squeals in excitement before practically running out of the room. Kate turns back around to face you all again, offering Fern a sheepish grin when the other girl glares at her lightly.

“You really want me to get expelled during my first semester here, huh?” Kate chuckles and even Fern giggles a little and shakes her head.

“It’ll work out fine,” Lu reassures you from her seat at her desk.

“Hey, maybe if we go to the fair we’ll see the guys from the all boys school,” Kate beams as she wiggles her eyebrows. “You know I love it when we run into them.” You’ve heard a lot of these kind of comments about guys from Kate over the last few weeks, but it still makes your heart sink every time.

“I swear you’re the horniest person in this entire school,” Fern jokes and Kate shrugs.

“What can I say? I know what I like.”

You head back to where you’d been sitting near Lu before. You let out a quiet sigh and try to ignore the conversation that continues, zoning out as you stare blankly at the floor. You miss the way Lu looks from you to Kate, a curious look on her face.

------------------------

You’re completely lost in your daydream as you rest your head on your hand, staring at Kate from your seat near the back of the classroom. Recognising that you have a pretty heavy crush on someone you consider a close friend, you’d decided to try to distance yourself slightly from Kate, at least until you can figure out what the hell to do to deal with your feelings. But you still continued to catch yourself with your eyes glued to her, watching her every move.

This time, though, you’re shaken from your daydream when Lu nudged you from the seat next to you. You quickly take your eyes from Kate and look to Lu.

“You okay?” She speaks in a hushed tone, trying not to gain any attention from the class.

“Hm? Oh, yeah.” You try to offer a convincing smile but she clearly doesn’t buy it.

“Really? ‘Cause I swear you haven’t taken your eyes off Kate the entire lesson.”

Your cheeks immediately turn red and you clear your throat, trying to gather your thoughts.

“No I haven’t.” Lu shoots you an incredulous look and a teasing smile shows up on her face.

“Oh yeah? What has Mr Middlewood been going on about this entire lesson, then?”

“Uh.” You glance quickly around the classroom, trying to find anything that will give you the answer but finding nothing. “Shakespeare?”

“Not even close.” You sigh and Lu’s eyes soften as she continues to watch you. “What’s on your mind?” You hesitate to speak and let your gaze settle back on Kate for another moment.

“The guys Kate was talking about. She’s with one of them?” You try to speak nonchalantly but you’re not entirely sure how convincingly you’re pulling it off.

“Honestly? I don’t know. I’ve seen her fool around with one of them a few times at some parties we’ve gone to, but I don’t think they’re actually together.”

“Right.” You nod and feel any hope you had left completely vanish. Lu studies you a little longer as you stare at your desk and your brow furrows slightly, completely lost in thought.

“You like her, don’t you?” She presents it as a question, though when your eyes snap up to meet hers you have a feeling she’s figured it all out anyway.

“What? No!” You speak in a defensive tone, much louder than you had intended, and almost the entire class turns to face you at your outburst. You try to make yourself appear smaller, offering Mr Middlewood an apologetic smile before he continues his lesson.

Shorty after, the bell rings and you stand up. Lu places a hand on your arm to get your attention.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. We don’t have to talk about it. But you know I’m here if you decide you want to, okay?” You see Kate starting to make her way over to you and Lu, so you quickly grab your things and look back to Lu.

“Okay.” You smile and nod at her. “I will. Thanks Lu.” She nods and lets you leave before Kate reaches your seat.

------------------------

Your interactions with Kate go kind of like this over the next few days. If you’re in a group setting, you tend to sit away from Kate, as much as you really would like to sit right next to her. If Kate asks to come by your room to study with you, you always come up with some excuse for her not to, and you’ve even gotten yourself out of some group plans too. Though very likely irrational, you figure it’s the best decision to keep your distance until your feelings fade.

On the day you're all meant to sneak out to the fair using the key Victoria had, the possibility of running into those guys comes to mind and you really try to get out of going.

“You absolutely have to come with us,” Lu says. You’re in your room, sitting on your bed while Fern sits at the chair by your desk and Lu stands.

“Yeah,” Fern says. “I’m meant to be helping Peter with his paper, so if they’re making me come then you have to as well.” You look at both of them as Kate and Victoria walk in through your open door. Kate leans on your desk and Victoria stands by the door.

“Well? Are we ready to go?” She looks at you all impatiently and Fern and Lu shoot you a look before you let out a sigh, standing.

“Yeah, let’s go.” You grab your jacket and you all head out, sneaking out of the building easily and starting the walk down the long road towards the fair.

“Hey.” You turn your head to find Kate walking beside you. She offers you a smile, which you return. “Where’ve you been hiding lately?”

“Oh, I’ve been around.” It feels wrong to not talk to Kate in the usual way you would, but she just seems glad to be talking to you now, smiling even wider at you before bumping her shoulder into yours lightly.

“Well, we’ve missed you.” You continue to walk side by side and you let yourself smile at Kate’s words.

When you reach the fair, you all grow more excited and you actually let yourself have some fun with your friends. Of course, this doesn’t as long as you’d hoped, as you hear Kate squeal in excitement before she’s running towards a group of boys. You and the other girls follow her and when she jumps at one of the guys and kisses him you try to act as unaffected as possible.

They decide to run off to the ferris wheel, leaving everyone else behind. You had already at some point lost Victoria and Fern makes it obvious that she wants to go off on her own somewhere too as she backs away from you and Lu, so you both wave her off and Lu turns to you.

“We should probably go make sure she’s gonna be okay over there.” She tilts her head in the direction of the ferris wheel and you sigh and nod at her begrudgingly. By the time you two stand in front of the ferris wheel, Kate is already cheering and yelling across the fair and you look up as the guy next to her pulls her closer and they kiss again.

“So that’s the guy, huh?” You struggle to keep your tone light as you watch the scene before you.

“Yeah. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” You shrug a shoulder and laugh dryly. “Of course the girl I like has to be straight.”

“Yeah. I think I kinda know that feeling too.” Your head turns fast as you look at Lu, and she just shrugs at you before explaining. “I’ve been finding out some stuff about myself recently too, I think. I’m sure you get it.” She gestures back towards the ferris wheel where Kate is cheering again, and you can’t help the smile that grows on your face at the sound of her laughter.

“You really like her,” Lu observes and you let out a deep sigh.

“Not that it matters.” You see some tables not far from you and point towards them. “Should we sit down and wait? We’ve clearly got a lot to discuss about you, too.” You smirk at her when she suddenly gets nervous and the two of you make your way to one of the tables.

------------------------

You and Lu are given a good amount of time to sit and talk before Kate comes over, stumbling as she stops in front of the table.

“Hey there, pretty ladies,” she says in greeting, slumping down into an empty chair and grinning widely.

“Oh god, Kate. How much did you end up drinking and smoking?” Lu wears a tired expression, probably already preparing herself for the walk home and getting Kate back into the school safely and quietly in her state.

“Mm, I don’t know.” Kate scrunches her forehead in thought for a moment before a cheeky grin takes over her face. “But, god, I forgot how great a kisser he is. We need to sneak out more often.” She bites her lip as you assume she thinks about the boy whose tongue was just down her throat, and it’s enough for you to abruptly stand up. Both Lu and Kate look at you.

“I’m gonna go find Fern and Victoria so we can head back.” Lu gives you a sad kind of smile and nods and you turn and walk away.

Thankfully Fern and Victoria were already walking together in search of you, so it didn’t take long before you were all walking backwards the school. Unfortunately for all of you, the weather decided to mirror what you were feeling, and so it absolutely poured as you all shuffled together miserably along the side of the road.

“Kate, stop walking out onto the road. No one’s going to stop for us.” Lu pulls Kate back to the side of the road, having already done so several times. Kate pouts and huffs heavily as she falls into step next to you.

“God, this is miserable,” you hear her mumble before she presses herself into your side and you let her for a moment, quietly enjoying the warmth she brings.

“Yeah, tell me about it,” you mutter, gently moving yourself away from her body. At the sudden loss of warmth, she looks to you in question.

“Are you okay?” She eventually asks. You keep your eyes facing straight ahead and you nod dismissively.

“Yeah.”

Kate opens her mouth to speak again but Lu obviously picks up on what’s going on, slotting herself between you and Kate and allowing you room to walk next to Fern. She offers you a reassuring smile that you aren’t quite expecting from her and then grabs your arm so you can both provide each other some warmth, walking in this position the rest of the way back.

------------------------

The next morning you’re sitting in the dining hall with Lu and Fern, finishing up with your breakfast when Kate takes the seat next to you.

“God, I think I’m paying for last night a little,” she runs a hand through her messy hair and picks up the mug that’s sitting on her tray. “This coffee better bring me back to life.” Before the conversation of last night can even continue, you stand up and grab your empty tray.

“Alright girls, I’m out of here.” You wave and begin to walk away before Kate pulls the mug away from her lips and calls your name to stop you.

“Did you want to maybe hang out later and watch a movie or something? It’s been a while.” She looks hopeful and you come close to saying yes, but instead force a smile onto your face.

“Uh, I’ve got a paper I really need to work on. Maybe some other time?” Her face drops a little and she nods at you as you turn to leave.

Kate turns to Lu and Fern who are both sitting silently.

“What’s up with her? She’s been acting so weird the last few days.” Kate pouts and looks at her friends, who both share a glance. “What?”

“Nothing.” Kate eyes her friends suspiciously.

“Okay, well that was an obvious lie. What is it?” Lu bites her lip, clearly unsure of what to do. “Come on, Lu.” She sighs and shoots a light glare at Kate.

“Okay, fine. Don’t tell her I told you this.” She pauses and Kate gestures for her to continue talking. “Y/N kinda has a pretty major crush on you so I think she’s just trying to distance herself a bit so she can deal with it,” Lu blurts out and Kate’s eyes widen at her.

“Wait. Y/N has a crush on me?”

“Uh, yeah dude. It’s pretty obvious. Even I figured it out,” Fern chuckles and Kate furrows her brow and blinks.

“I didn’t even know she was into girls,” she mumbles to herself. “But I don’t get it, that’s why she’s been acting weird with me?”

“Well, yeah.” Lu shrugs one shoulder at Kate as if it should have been obvious. “I mean, you’ve talked about guys almost non-stop, and you hooked up with that guy last night. She’s just trying to spare her own feelings by having some distance from you.”

Kate tilts her head. “What do you mean? How will that spare her feelings?”

“Well, you’re straight. So she knows you can’t reciprocate her feelings.” A beat of silence falls over the table and all three girls feel the weight of it. “Wait. You are straight, right?”

------------------------

You sit in Mr Middlewood’s class next to Lu, trying to focus on the lesson. ‘Trying’ being the keyword. You’ve caught Kate more than a handful of times trying to subtly look at you over her shoulder. Again, ‘trying’ being the keyword. She definitely wasn’t the most subtle person you’ve ever met.

“What’s she doing?” You whisper when you catch her gaze again before she quickly looks away.

Lu looks up from her book. “What’s who doing?”

“Kate. She keeps looking over here. Plus, I swear I haven’t heard her flirt with Mr Middlewood once this whole lesson.”

“Oh. I hadn’t noticed.” Kate looks over yet again and looks back the other way, and you continue to watch her in confusion.

“See. She just did it again.” Lu remains silent and a thought suddenly hits you. “You didn’t tell her, did you?” You look at Lu and she instantly becomes a stuttering mess, avoiding your eyes.

“Um..”

“Lu! Are you serious!” You hiss, avoiding calling attention to yourself in the middle of class again.

“I’m sorry!” Lu tries. “She knew something was up so-“

“So you just told her? Oh my god.” You drop your face in your hands and thankfully hear the bell ring, standing and grabbing your books. You completely avoid looking in Kate’s direction again.

“I’ll see you later?” Lu asks hopefully with a sheepish smile on her face.

“We’ll see. I haven’t decided if I’m gonna kill you or not yet.” You glare at her as you walk away but you both know you likely won’t stay mad at her for long. Trying to dart through the hallway as quickly as you can, you’re stopped by a hand on your elbow and you turn to find exactly who you weren’t really wanting to see right now.

“Y/N.” Kate says carefully.

“Uh, hey Kate.” Her hand stays on your arm, but she brings it further down to your forearm.

“Are you headed to your room?” You nod. “Mind if I walk you?” She smiles at you, but you note that it lacks the playful kind of confidence her smiles usually carry.

You hesitate for a moment but decide you might as well have whatever conversation you need to have with her and get it over with.

“Uh, sure.” She nods gratefully to you and drops her hand from your arm as you begin to walk side by side towards your room. As you walk, the continued silence between the two of you makes you increasingly more nervous, going over scenarios in your head of what Kate might want to talk to you about.

Reaching your door, you turn to Kate who still hasn’t said a word since you started walking. “Thanks for walking me here. I guess I’ll see you-“

“Is it okay if I come in for a minute? I kinda wanted to talk to you.” Her body looks pretty tense and she’s acting so unlike how she normally does that you feel a sinking feeling wash over you, expecting the worst.

She doesn’t want to be friends anymore. I fucked it up, you think to yourself.

“Yeah, okay,” you manage, opening the door for her to walk through. You close you eyes tightly for a moment and breathe, keeping your emotions at bay before you follow Kate into your room.

You silently watch her as she paces the floor of your room a few times, deciding on taking a seat at the edge of your bed. Her knee bounces and she looks anywhere but at you. You take another breath to try and calm yourself down before you finally can’t take it anymore.

“Alright Kate, let’s just get this over with.” She looks up to meet your eyes, confusion across her face.

“Get this over with?” You shoot her a slightly exasperated look.

“Come on. I know Lu told you.” Kate bites her lip and drops her eyes, and normally you’d find it cute but this whole conversation seems to have you on edge. “You don’t want to be friends anymore,” you state as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Kate’s head snapping back up to look at you sends you a different message, though.

“Wait, what? That’s what you think I want?”

“Well, yeah.” You feel less sure of yourself after Kate’s reaction, your tone less aggressive. “This stupid crush has obviously made things too awkward now.”

“That’s not it at all. The opposite, actually.” Kate seems to find some of her confidence again and she sits a little straighter, sounds a bit more sure of herself.

“What do you mean?” Kate pats the spot on the bed next to her, waiting for you to join her before she speaks.

“Since I first met you, there’s always been something pulling me towards you. It’s confused me for a while now, but I never really thought about it too much. And I don’t think I realised what it was until Lu told me that you liked me.” Kate’s eyes stare into yours and she looks nervous, maybe even scared, but she takes a deep breath to steady herself before grabbing your hand.

“I’m an idiot for not realising it sooner.” She places a hand on your cheek and strokes it softly with the pad of her thumb, her eyes travelling your face.

“Kate?”

Hearing your voice brings Kate out of the trance she had found herself in, her eyes meeting yours again before she slowly leans her head towards yours. You somehow find the confidence to meet her halfway, her soft lips pressing against your own.

Your first kiss is light and you only pull back for a tiny moment before Kate lets go of your hand to pull you in closer by the waist. Your second kiss is all smiles and quiet laughter and you eventually have to pull back when you’re both grinning too wide for the kiss to continue.

Catching your breath, your eyes move from Kate’s grin up to her stunning eyes.

“So, you don’t want to stop being friends with me then?” Kate chuckles and shakes her head at you.

“Okay, forget what I said before. You’re the idiot.” Your mouth falls open only with mild offence before Kate’s pulling you towards her again.

#tanner hall imagine #brie larson x reader #kate x reader #brie larson imagine #tanner hall #brie larson #mine #fic

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localrobosexual · 7 years ago

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sad AMV dream

I had a dream last night that I came up with two more transformers AMV ideas, but like, it wasn’t that I was in first person watching the AMVs themselves play out in front of me it was more like I sat at my desk, pulled up some sort of browser or editing program and just, somehow magically made and then watched them myself?? idk it was weird

well in any case the first AMV was very heavily inspired by/based on this one Until Dawn storyboard puzzlii made to Wolf Song by Amanda Palmer. It was about Knock Out confronting Silas/Breakdown (I think maybe zombie Breakdown too at another point but I can’t really remember??) and his subsequent shock/horror of it. I had the lyrics altered too kinda like how puzzlii did with changing “father” to “sister” to fit Josh and Hannah in Until Dawn, except mine was changed from “father” to “conjunx”. So it would go “you look exactly like my father conjunx / look exactly like my father conjunx / you’re exactly like my father conjunx / exactly like my father conjunx” and during that first half, like how puzzlii had Hannah changing from a wendigo to her past self, it had Silas/Breakdown shifting back and forth from when he was alive.

and then the second half of the song with “you said you’d be back in an hour / you said you’d be back in an hour / you said you’d be back by the weekend / you said you’d be back by the weekend / etc” would flash back to Knock Out waiting in the medbay for Breakdown to come back from his mission to assassinate Airachnid but he never did, and getting really worried wondering where he was and what happened to him, before eventually a vehicon finally comes up and tells him what happened in the end and he just kinda loses it after the vehicon leaves?? iT WAS RLLY SAD MAN HECK BUT IT WAS ALSO KINDA FITTING AND IM????? BRUH THE HECK

the second AMV was hardly an AMV at all since it was only like, a few seconds long?? but it used the same song except with a few additional points which I can’t remember for the life of me, and I don’t even know how I would’ve made it up in the first place since I’ve never listened to the full song?? but anyways the part I can remember was just a short little sequence of Overlord with his head down chained up in the basement of the Lost Light and the music rose and got all intense like how it does at the end of the segment in puzzlii’s storyboard and at the whispered “let me come in” part of the song he just raised his head up and opened his eyes and grinned. But that was it. Not too too sure what that was all about or what it was supposed to relate to but?? it was a thing I guess lol

so yeah that was pretty much it?? I’m cool with sharing these just because I don’t have a super strong desire to make them, especially since they were so incredibly similar to puzzlii’s work. Or even if I did, I’d probably never release it publicly. Just because like. I don’t wanna straight up rip em off even tho I literally had a dream about it pfffftt. I mean at the very least I might sketch it out sometime since it was kinda compelling but then again??? I probably won’t, I dunno

#words of meg #I didn't sleep too well last night either lmao #couldnt get my gosh darn stupid brain to shut up #I had I Will Never Forget by Kimya Dawson stuck in my head and I couldnt get it to stop playing aUGH #was up past like 12:30 smh #and then I kept waking up in the middle of the night #like at 2 #and then at 7 #weird #but hey I Will Never Forget is another rlly good song I wanna animate robots to aaAAAAAAAAAA #THAT FEEL OF RLLY WANTING TO TALK ABOUT UR ANIMATION IDEAS BUT ALSO NOT WANTING TO BC AS SOON AS U PUT EM OUT THERE SOMEONE COULD STEAL EM #IM SO DISTRAUGHT #IT'S SO GOOD THO #one last thing ok puzzlii's a rlly good animator yall should totally check em out if u want!!

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hannahsspotlight · 6 years ago

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Hannah’s Spotlight

2019 by Jacob Hagedorn

Awake all night, now Asking Saint Chris in the morning about the weather shows how up-for-chaos an agender, asexual is when there is a party happening downstairs, already chaotic, as the alarm alarms and I rub my eyes - my sister’s graduation party.

You may come to know of my worries in a flaming context that proves that I am centered some; mornings I feel the pain so. The worrisome functions are still snowballing - and even if I hold out my hand, Saint Chris shakes it, even tho I was just needy of solutions and was unsurprised he decided to leave the day as a surprise.

Ignoring the noise from downstairs, and circling the present moment, I am sitting on the side of the bed and gazing plainly out the window, the dreams of the night - this time, a lot like other times, was of the demon in my closet that will be left discrete, that is certainly not blood and that makes me cry even if it is a dream now…not crying now - although it was quite real then, and it made me sick to be reminded, or made out to be some sort of Event that was uncanny considering I was mostly content and happy and did not have all that many dark ideas or concepts hovering over me or inside me - it is anxiety and it will be examined but not made of the entirety of my mood. And that is what is funny, a different version is in fact inside me and it is not beautiful. It is what made me how I am way back when.

The schizo affective muttering (addition) slips from my tongue as I turned on collaborative paraphrasing, ergo modern indie rock, and also pulling out strings of hair of figuring out what color of shirt I was going to where - hmm, not a crop top or leggings today, and definitely no magical robe. It is not Sunday, yet this event there will be people of somewhat or definite promising futures or a presence of presents and giving presents. The thought occurred to me about how I am going to probably miss my morning coffee, so I chose a white polo and settled for a bottle of water on my desk. My sister will be beginning a masters study at The University of Texas in Austin.

There will be all sorts of personal cringing for not being adamant about the latest political buzz, or cameras, or philosophy, and even wanting to run back upstairs to take the one bullet from my closet for the one, personal use because my scholarly voice is not of par or being a whole failure - god damn it, being dramatic; I smirk then cringe. The aura from downstairs ignored, *shiver*.

There is no toleration, only anxiety - an outcast feeling, in my home too due to said party. The way to feel alright is to know not only is the person themselves doing alright, it is if we are alright together - mutual concern. Otherwise we are not picking each other’s brain or learning but we are just filling time and air. I am not apt to showing upright confidence, and also I am too experienced to act defeated..usually coming off precisely sarcastic or nonchalant but I am rather just worked up in some way - and hopefully it is not painful for them although it is for me and I fight to survive in this world.

Asking questions is a bit easier than developing something interesting as a response, so this will not be too difficult - the people will not seem familiar mostly; just my parents and sister of course. I will find a seat and sit for about one whole hour, than escape back upstairs to avoid being killed, to be safe, and most likely to read a comedy book meaning drama and not all that funny in modern context - that can be funny in it’s own way to me at least. Okay I will wear the white polo, blue jeans, and just socks. Books are my escape, and I usually get something out of them that was not intended, which indeed makes me frantic about it; frantic about most anything but the breathing is still manageable and I can smile about random things.

Outside there are cars parked and the front door opening and closing to people making loud exclamations towards one another. Imagination brings me to the idea that if, when downstairs, they are all in fact monkeys swinging from the chandelier or turtles stacking on top of each other to reach heights to balance the monkeys swinging and than - possibly - a huge rhino (resembling chaotic power) plows them all over to all truly exceed my expectations and giving me a reason to take out my video camera, taping the rupture to finally being close to have an interesting scenario to show besides being a character in someone else’s figment. Participating is worrisome at times. Having control of a concept helps me sleep at night; make it healthy and good for all the right reasons, I hope.

Yeah, I do not get out much. The college schoolwork is homeschool and I have never been on a date - 22 years old, and the most interesting thing about me is that I am a filmmaker against the odds of popular aspirations, which does not bother me because I am easily inspired. The most interesting film style, personally, is music videos - one can match sound with physical - double the emotion, and that is the only pleasure I get considering the small amount of emotion I muster up on average - not much, and my personal musical scores live in a way together with the visual depictions.

There are no friends downstairs or outside, or anywhere - there are none at all in this life. There is not a map to find me, a trace online or a voice of hints; no use, there is no point in making connections, there must be more wrong with me…I am a bit taken aback at any social point. Making short films or music videos for the simple, acoustic piano songs I make for practice occupies me and I do it for myself completely, I say. To study music theory, or video editing techniques, or new gear knowledge is what I will study on my own - listen, celebrate truth not success (the difference is slim). The truth is I am asexual/agender and this is not the problem, it is just how I am, and yet my parents would like me to get married and there is an obvious raincheck for that. Karen, the eldest of us two and my older sister does not currently have a boyfriend, so she is far from family building as I am, although her chances of success is higher in my eyes - but I probably just will not find a success in that ever; cats, or rhinos.

Muttering my name over and over eyes to eyes: ‘Adam, Adam, Adam, Adam…’.The mirror reflects the body flailing to the music now, vocal paraphrasing, gusts of strums, and strikes of keys - precisely pumping myself up for the bussing job downstairs; cleaning is somewhat a priority but I do have delusions on how often things should be helped when there is a public setting; guessing it is a random obsession act. If the obsessing grows and there is not a dialogue happening at any rate, maybe there is an escape to the neighborhood park. It is only partly true to myself; am not against the human race at all.

The rhythm of aimlessness is a settled spiral till the end where it shoots out in every which way that refuses to be gathered; so you need someone else to pick a point for you, and I have been waiting for that. The loneliness coming naturally ergo this sense of sexuality, although it is really a lack of sexuality, teaches me to start points logically before they spiral and match them with some other logic as an arrow headed somewhere. If it is going to be chaotic soon, there must be a theme and most of the time the idea is of loneliness, being introverted and having no interest in most emotions. So, dancing for a short duration, or going downstairs is actually a huge risk because the voice in my head thinks it an apt time to mock myself and feel small; worthless, and when I do shrivel back into my reality…I feel ashamed.

Sing along for myself, make my bed for myself, and make any effort for myself - this is why the days are long and frantic; there is no one to speak with or of, and for awhile now. My phone does not buzz, no one is ringing the door bell for me, and there are nobody checking in. If I mixed it up and wore a dress, that would be for myself but it ruins all chance for myself and others, even though I know that is not true - more or less to be included but I wish I was just already in the midst of it all. People pretend they want to get away, like they do not rely on gratification at all - and maybe there conversations are not a good-heavy, but at least something is going on in general for them; surely there is good tho.

Now not a completely aimless morning, running back some personal favorites of my musical creations; sketching out visual scenes that probably will not make sense to anyone, including myself. A mood, or even a title, is more powerful than trying to depict meaning - and there is no feedback in my life but I sure enjoy it anyhow, even if beauty is misunderstood or short of cohesiveness. The lack of emotion, the lack of interesting subject, the lack of genuine message: all leaves me sulking, but only in the context of if anyone sees it - what will they think? I know my life has meaning, and the results I am fine archiving or even releasing to be found years from now by one person that may be inspired; best scenario, and absolutely worth the effort whenever it was started. And if not, it satisfied me for a moment while personally interacted with.

Most of my college credits are things that interest me, and there is not a day set for a known completion - there is a chance college will never be completed on my behalf, and I guess that is okay; music, German, fiction, history - it all is great and would not be possible to go in person, although missing society and seeing a smile on a face in reality would be healthy for me, and would create a new sense of how to integrate myself into society, help it grow in some small way, and inspire me to smile myself too.

Then I shift to be in the midst of other music, other videos - it reminds me of meth back a year ago when the nightmares began; crippling, lonesome experience: the most risky endeavor of my life, and I have done my share of rehabs and mental hospitals - combining heroin does not work, of course. Mold, enjoying mold?… *Shiver*, relax and refocus. The mere sound or visual intake of what inspires me: does so freely, and I am washed away in a tide of bliss and love because they are so much accompanied by endearment; there comes tears and something magical to identify with, and the only time emotion is uncontrollable - it could go on forever, but then I get back to myself: nothing; nothing great at all - I will go take a shower. Their magic is not my magic, unfortunately - yet I can take a next step which is always good.

Standing there, through the hallway, by the stairs, I could hear the roar of the crowd and sudden laughter, or indecipherable exclamations. The anxiety in me grew. What is my name? Part of controlling the chaos within is realizing that most people are much like you; different, but living in the same time. Maybe I just feel challenged a lot - by myself, and uncontrollably by others; being fixed on a craft or just having a clear mind makes you a bore unless situationally. I turn on the water.

The future imagined is far from soon receiving disability, or staying at home much longer - ugh- ; it is actually not a defeated mindset, it is finding love in the impossible way meaning romance is so foreign. In the shower I look at the Blue Bed tattoo on my leg, the color fading - maybe the bed is where I belong and may also be the negative influence of my imagination: it is emotionless yet powerful in it being so necessary - although my bed is white. Being aware of having a version of laziness is far from humorous - it makes me sick even though I know a lot can be done or discovered in a bed. I get out of the shower, towel off, skip brushing my teeth, and look in the mirror all ready: boy.

There could be a whole lifetime wasted on depicting reality and worrying about it - and to think I can turn it into art even if it will never be seen is an impossibility and is a part of my delusional thinking - the stuff is important, but I cannot communicate any contrast at all of anything. I am happy mostly, because I intake and study at moments - it is all so beautiful indeed. A boost of confidence is needed, and the reason appearing downstairs is frightening is because hope has only let me down over the course of my life - and being happy is separate than that I believe. Being optimistic, and resetting that optimism is mostly quite simple in retrospect; we mainly defeat ourselves.

No matter the song, no matter the image - there will be a break of ego and the mutual, yet confusing (for me) interest will be kicked around and it will kill me slowly even if it is only two minutes at each go - and there is a bad habit ingrained to just walk away to somewhere else; me, awkward and rude. Do not get me wrong, I am capable of admiring and developing of just about any topic - the emotion they feel though, and what they are trying to relay for some reason does not register. I just say, ‘Oh yeah!…’ and feel defeated and death-near.

Mother said the party will go on till about 2 o’clock. I pretend to look for clothing when I see my closet is cracked; shivering and cold - there is no demon here now, though there probably is but I am sober or not in a dream to be in that sort of realm, and that is terrifying of itself. When it happened then, the creature thew up black mold onto my floor, and was gracefully-but-weirdly accompanied by beautiful, blissful string music; what I heard before and after seeing the most terrifying visual. That song, that I could identify still to this day, is in my hopes that there was also an actual angel soothing me against terror, but what a small closet! There is no way to be an entity with such demonic attire but also mustering up the sound of heaven; I heard heaven and now the closet is closed.

Some tears came as the chair by my desk spun around with me in it - stopping, put palms to face and bending over to my knees; this is my aesthetic, and this will not get easier. A bit of nausea as well, with sweaty palms which makes the whole Manly concept a joke in my shoes. My voice, when speaking anywhere or with anyone, sound like someone is pinching my face and demanding I talk sweeter - like immediate and organic sincerity, but the mocking voice in my head often makes me sound drastically uninterested - and that is just not true.

If the thought of ‘The One’ appears in the brain, it is known that the concept is of the bullet or even the demon - not a real person that is of a hoping mind, or a golden opportunity. The violence is too drastic and the occasion is not on this course of this now though; just a thought and the gun is in the attic - I’d blow holes in my soul for it to rain and come down on the people; the chandelier falling and the creatures in panic as I am in panic in a way but different. Cheers to the few. The white walls in the room are getting higher - and the shadow still lurks in some way - this is the haunting aura and it has just begun. Maybe that experience will be chased endlessly in a way throughout my life - because the music could not have come from evil, jest-like cruelty that was in my face; running out of the room then to my parents was a feeling I have not felt since I was a young child - all the times avoiding nightmares.

Haunted is right; cynical things have happened and even if Hopeless is more daily than anything else, I sometimes think there are no pros only cons in this experience. My friends left me from high school, my parents do not accept me fully, have been shown no grace by society it seems, although I try to get included, and it goes roughly - even if that somehow seems like I am showing grace and easing myself the apparent defeated attitude; I do not want that, this is just what is known by me for the last year or so: more than ever before. There is nothing gained from these ego deaths besides never having to feel this emotion newly again; old and new now, but when it is new it stings above all and I teach myself to minimize the old into a secondary worrisome-process. Maybe I will shed this perspective - good things have happened and will happen I now admit. This tends to happen: it is about latching on to something hopeful and good in the end of a segment, starting a new. There are pros, so let me work this out.

My parents will be smiling, my sister too - that makes it easier; seemingly friendly and inviting: this comes natural for them, and I will busy myself with dishes or offering organic smiles for a millisecond then break away and look down. If the people think I am selfish, they are probably right. When I snuck away and eased with drugs, that was easy - although there was never a point to rely on it completely. This is doable, this is manageable and my sweaty hands are just my sweaty hands - the spiraling and chaotic arrows of unsettling anxiety will not kill me. One foot after the other; conversation and interaction is healthy - that is known but not practiced personally. Following sentences and coming to realize the purpose of them always wants me to practice more - keep asking questions until you find out a unique point and than feel satisfied that they have managed a sincere smile; something like an accomplishment, and making them feel okay mutually - no lies at all, and a mutual firework will gleam around the room back and forth until that night when someone smiles in bed, thinking: ‘That was a good day.’ That is what I hope altogether, and it makes the uncomfortable feeling less dramatic - the pressure shortens.

I am smiling - wow. The mania is drifting towards a light indeed, and it is fait that works in my favor sometimes - and also, of course, feeling giddy about the light. Is this a dream? - gleaming again. If the day started again I would have began it with this song - rolling down a hill, momentum gaining, love or joy possible. There is satisfaction now that the day is coming together - or falling specifically in a happy array of flowers; a new perspective I suppose. Caught on, holding on - near the stairs; deep breathe. Ok, Adam.

Glaring to my left and right with softish eyes, mostly an excited stance, things are lively but not as quick and random as I had imagined. Some see me and give a little smile, in meaning that they recognize me, or a general arrow towards me of pure addition; one more in the room, and even though that did not hold up to my usual satisfaction - that ideology - but knowing there were all sorts of personalities, like the thirty-five or so human figures and voices, that opened up all sort of possibilities for a better chance at a satisfying exchange. My stomach started to hurt; feel a little light headed and my heart kind of is fluttering. I can make out words from people, like: ‘Yes!’, ‘Right.’, ‘Well..’, ‘How did you..’, ‘Ya know..’, etc.

Making way for the caffeine and to find my family one by one to locate for a secure feeling. My sister had her hands on her waist and then raising them as she proudly embraces an old friend - she is just as enthusiastic about mutuals. Right now, a feeling of contentment and satisfaction overtake me because of how much she has accomplished and how much she will too; she is just getting started making a positive impact. A wide smile, a Texan tan, and freshly highlighted hair: people use to identify us as twins, but I stand mildly random about my appearance and hardly prepare - this in fact is not my big day, but it is so for a lot of other reasons.

My mother wearing a flowery dress - big smile, next to my dad, talking to a couple that I know is from church that knew us kids since we were born. Mom is the same person that comforted me when things were low: friends lost, feelings damaged, or a lack of hope in any way. My dad has expressed that he has similar social anxieties or a worried mind no matter the situation - he handles everything just fine, and participates for the sake of loving his family and being proud of everyone. For me, there is an indescribable love for my family - but the fact that there is a house full of people is more potent of a state currently; no matter the original motive.

The first person that talks to me is my dad’s best-friend’s wife, who is the mother of two boys that were some of my best friends when I was very young. Where are they? Your husband too! They were such a great family, and I have not seen any of them in about five or so years. She told me the youngest was working at a camp in Oklahoma, and the eldest was with his father seeing a baseball game in Michigan; where my dad and his friend were from, and the Tigers to always root for. Although a newish, spare-time occupation, writing scores for videos, she heard that that is how I spend my life instead of leaving the house; she knew that too from just the look of me and how I talk seemingly. *Blush*, I asked about the boy’s college experiences and that conversation vanished when the first exit appeared, somehow and it was awkward; I do not know how it was carried but damn it… 0/1.

When arriving at the back patio to find a seat around a table, I was able to recollect and be reflective on how it was going: planning how my tone and mood would contrast with anyone. Breathing, dressed boyish but when talking to any woman here my voice goes up and my pronunciation is more upright and feminine - there are people looking when this happens, but it is when I am the most myself, and the more I ask questions with a more giddy yet wholesome aura, the more people actually hug me or say Adam with some playfulness. The women have strings of potent emotions, and the men seem to scale on productivity or focused on how the present will effect the future; to express intricate stories that may not be but for the purpose of striking a meaning of the subject - to laugh and identify something of value, versus concrete, masculine ideations.

Today, right now, does not remind me of anything here, like a video I have seen; there is no music either happening and the thought of either music or visual captions is appealing due to a boredom, or a genuine idea to process something so foreign to me - the company at the house. The loud crowd and the people hustling around could in fact be cut/arranged into a romantic piece of a sort - the people on the patio could look interesting from across the street, my mom decorates pretty well indeed, and the music would have no beat - but a major key piano that is medium paced, ergo soothing and inviting to showcase gleeful gatherings with hyper zoomed out or in with a Karen voiceover. I do not know; to me it is fun to think about - although it maybe shows how amateur and unfocused I am in actuality. *Yawn*.

Sweat on my body, and shaking hands - my mother comes over and asks if I recently got up from bed: yes, and is Karen enjoying herself amongst friends? She said yes, in fact, she may have found a roommate for Austin or at least a complex to consider. If I made friends that easy, there would be a different future. If it is zoomed out, like the cinema, it would be a ballroom of ants. They come as they come, some dressed as they are or other. How I feel is that I should crawl away back upstairs to where the big red dragon reigns. Now I turn left or right; not going to wait. Pick one of the ants, a new priority but mouth dry - drink tea. Would it be too much to ask if I was wearing a terrifying bird mask? Sipping tea sparingly via slightly taking off the mask; they probably would still ask how my life is and it would not feel any different to me, but they would ask to go off to sit somewhere with my vote and hearty permission, it is so. Been waiting for the urge to run inside to turn on Peter Pan in the living room for the room. Why am I waiting? Or why is my guilty conscience racing my identity?

Looking at my fingernails, somewhat in tune with the feelings of the movements, yet all the reasons they are laughing are contradicting the electric jest of the real psychotic charity I am holding a white flag for - no one is helping and this is why I quit drugs. Speaking any tongue to me is a way I feel like the victim of all this: frightened; yes? Do tell me about the looming elegance of interaction that I have for years avoided; developing a horrific laziness, but I am editing colors in my head calmly at the moment. I get up to go for the coffee, seemingly pressing on with more anxiety coming with the caffeine; maybe just two cups and some tea later.

In the process of giving up being so young and difficult, ready to change partly; an adult, that looks familiar, heads towards the couch I am sitting on - sipping hot coffee, and my soul completely dropped. Uh, uh, uh, uh. A tunnel brought her closer, and she was growing radiantly, now towering over me, in complete surprise.

‘Don’t you remember me, Adam?’ With both hands around her back, and a teeth-smile that broke my eye contact immediately after. Fucking emotion, I remember her - she glances at the space between us, and I say,

‘Sleep…Sorry, I felt asleep.’ Yet my legs were shaking, oh heaven.

‘Do you feel lonely over here all by yourself?’ It is Hannah. Hannah was mormon some time ago, she sometimes hangs out with my old high school buddies ,which those friendships dissolved, and her older brother took Karen to Homecoming her junior year.

‘Hannah. How are you? Your hair is short and purple. I like that! And your voice has changed.’

‘How so?’

‘I do not know, you have changed.’ One. Definite nice one, Adam…

‘Oh, well it is so nice seeing, it has been years! So, film?’

We were in film club together sophomore year in high school and she was just as attentive and passionate about it. She was the fashion hand, which now makes sense - her yellow, unicorn shirt is intriguing. Butterfly earrings and very well done, minimal makeup, eyeliner, and light blue fingernail polish. It is just a genuine breathe-take seeing her - this makes me very happy, and now my voice gets higher but normalizing. I feel comfortable as she sits right next to me on the couch with our drinks.

Impossible to resign when faced with the uttermost sincerity; struck by a calm, white cloud, it feels. When she touched my shoulder after an accidental Lonesome reveal, all the voices hushed in the rooms it seemed as she grinned with contentment. There is no rush for me: bright blue eyes. Hannah has changed a lot indeed - she has grown to be magnificent and she proves that when I say ‘I am not sure…’ and she makes me think it is known in fact, whatever it is; a needed grasp on the self that she seemingly promotes and delicately practices. Go on and ask her:

‘How are your friends?…my old pals?’ Smirking minimally in naiveness actually, because she did not feel challenged - not one bit.

‘They talk about you! Everyone worries about you of course. Ya know, you had some pretty daring obstacles: the drug season maybe, that is so incredible that you have conquered!’

Hannah paints for fun, she showed me a waterfall from her phone, and also works at a gallery now across town, plus a breakfast place on weekends. She is getting more exact on the spectrum of relation - I am dark; everywhere that has been explored for satisfaction was in a false mindset: people, or just maybe her now makes me realize that what has been going on inside is definitely affecting the outcome of my reality. It is the experience she has had, and a knack for keeping it genuine, and this all astonishes me. Now I see that maybe my friends moved on because they needed room to grow: that is a sad thought, but she is proof of evolution in any case of more growth. At school, Hannah was quiet, and stuck mostly around her church friends yet still sweet as can be when speaking out in film club.

‘Did Alex ever tell you… oh, never mind.’ I stopped, being stupid and knocking down the fortress of purity, or the floating adoration bubble she herself brought over and freely included me. Alex was like me in some ways: feeling explorer, and we grew so close it felt like the only thing romance is grouped with in my life in context.

She laughed smartly at words we were saying and the emotion they proclaimed and we, together, were intertwined in a function of progress.

‘Tell me what?’

‘Never mind that. My realm is just a little dark…’

There was a point where there was self-inflicted, heavy tension for me, but not between us. Hannah’s beam was not fading, but I am realizing that this is taking a lot of work for her considering the unhealthy preoccupation that possesses my mind regularly and is seeping out, and with no beam of my own at all. Obviously far from any sensual ideations, and she seems way bigger than me and the attempt to equalize shows me like out-of-options and struck dumb and numb.

We did not go on a walk and I could not find the words to pursue more questions in her direction; how selfish indeed, yet she gave me her number and she told me to update her on my work and I told her the same - me, beyond perplexed and unspeakably inspired. Today, Hannah is my blessing. As the people left, and my sister was happy, I asked Karen about her and she says they have talked before - only a couple months ago too. That night, instead of wondering when there would be another opportunity to redeem myself, or wondering when there would be another event in satisfaction in general in my life: I closed my bedroom door, danced as the sun went down, and Hannah’s everlasting spotlight cleansed my soul and guided the demons away. And I thought: You learn to dance when you fall in with nothing to do, like the universe; my own hell diminished by bliss and the one that saved my day - I fell asleep smiling knowing influence is soft, and a chance for a beautiful state to be accessible is at any moment if I try and acknowledge the eternal beauty of the human race; till tomorrow, and all I will need is a smile.

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