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#jake kiszka
katuschka · 3 days
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I just had to. It was stronger than me... :D
@writingcold @edgingthedarkness @thewritingbeforesunrise @takenbythemadness @lvnterninthenight @its-interesting-van-kleep @fleet-of-fiction @josh-iamyour-mama @jazzyfigz @peaceloveunitygvf @clownstan @lipstickittty @Dayumclarizzel @gvfmarge @emojakekiszka @lizzys-sunflower @fleetingjake @cheersdannyx2 @sanguinebats
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“don’t forget that i’m five minutes older than you bitch”
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wildbluesorbit · 1 day
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GET THIS AWAY FROM ME 🫣😵‍💫
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📸jakeforsakeher
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I can't take any more
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We all know I am one of the biggest rhythm section lane girlies on this app but sometimes? Just sometimes, folks, Jake does something and it makes me wanna turn on my blinker
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seenoversundown · 23 hours
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For Death Or Glory : Chapter Nineteen
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Jake Kiszka x Charlotte (Fem OC)
Warnings: 18+ Smut | NSFW | Spice Level : A LOT (if you prefer to not read warnings this is your chance to scroll away, otherwise read the warnings besties xoxo)
Unprotected Sex (consensual! wrap it up at home, folks!) Oral (f&m receiving) Soft Dom/Sub vibes- they switch off, Mirrors are involved, Pet names used, Hand kink briefly, Praise Kink (YEAHHH), FOUL language, Shower scene (some smut involved in there too), and obviously- fluff, sweet, precious, wholesome things that'll wake up the butterflies.
Word Count: 5k 😈
Summary: After a day together in Salem, they have the apartment to themselves for a bit.. so why not take advantage?
Author's Note: I think you'll agree- we ALL deserved this chapter. Strap in, it's a spicy one. Get your sweat towel and have a water ready! (That's so dramatic) But for real- this chapter is sexy as hell and maybe.. there's something important in it, but that's neither here nor there 👀 Happy Thursday! 💕
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To Be Alone - Hozier "Honey, when you kill the lights, and kiss my eyes, I feel like a person for a moment of my life."
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“You’re full of surprises today; why don’t you decide, babe?”
Babe– the sound of it playing on a loop in my head. 
“If you keep calling me that, I’ll give you endless attention,” I mumble against her lips. 
She presses a soft kiss into me before letting out, “Mmm, babe.” 
I hum back, “Mhmm.” 
“What about baby?” she asks sweetly. Lifting her onto the counter and standing between her legs, I let my hands sit on either side of her. 
I mumble back, “That also works.” Holding eye contact but looking down at her lips a few times. Leaning back in to leave a few pecks on her before going back to my part-time job of staring at her. 
“I already know that Captain gets you going,” she giggles. I can feel the blood rush into my face. I don’t know why it works, but it does. 
“What are you trying to do here?” I cock an eyebrow up at her as I ask. 
She pouts her lip, “Oh, are you not enjoying it, daddy?”
“God,” I groan, my head falling back for a second. “You’re asking for it now.”
“Mmm, yes, Jake, I am,” she almost sounds like she’s moaning. If I weren’t trying to keep it together, I’m pretty sure my eyes would have rolled into the back of my head at that. 
Grabbing the edges of my shirt, she pulled me in, and her lips felt desperate. Her teeth lightly tugged at my bottom lip, and I sighed at the feeling. She lets her arms drape over my shoulders, relishing in the feeling of her lips on mine. The way she goes out of her way to kiss my top lip before smiling into me. 
“Hey, you,” I whisper, letting my eyes wander to hers. 
Her sweet smile as we make eye contact, “Hi, handsome.” 
Her hands found their place, holding my jaw, pressing kiss after kiss into me. I pull her hips into me, letting her legs wrap around my waist as I lift her off the counter. 
Struggling to walk straight, I push my bedroom door open with my foot, kicking it shut behind me. Her legs start to slide down me, so I help her stand back up. She spins us around, backing me up to the edge of the bed. She lightly pushed my chest once my legs hit my bed frame, I quickly sat down for her. She grabs my shoulders and straddles my lap; I look up at her while she hovers above me.  Letting her take control is the most lethal thing for me.
She finally brings her face back down to mine; something about how she’s kissing me makes my heart flutter.
 Her hands slid under my shirt, pushing it up. I pull it off quickly, watching her eyes drop to my chest before her hands slowly creep up my stomach until her arms are around my neck. The lower she sits on me, the further up her skirt goes. I tug on the bottom so she sits up, unzipping the side to easily slide it off.
She sits back on my lap with just her tights covering her legs; I can see the dainty black thong she has on underneath, and something about being able to see it through the tights is making me sweat. 
The feeling of her lips against my throat as her hands unbuttoned my pants. The sound of my zipper felt loud as hell in the moment. 
“Stand up for me,” I finally tell her. 
I slide off my pants, tossing them towards my closet. Standing up with her in front of me, I grab the hem of her sweater, pull it over her head, and set it behind me on the bed. I sit on the end of my bed, pulling her towards me but spinning her to face the mirror. My hands hold her hips; I bring her down onto my lap. Pressing kisses into her shoulder. I slide my hands around her, hugging her, feeling her skin against mine. She runs her hands up my arms a little and tilts her head into mine. 
I keep one arm wrapped around her waist and move the other to slide down her thigh. Dancing my fingers along the inside of her leg, pulling them apart. Hooking her knee over mine, spreading her open. I look up into the mirror, meeting her stare. 
The hand holding her waist slid up, toying with the edge of her bra. Tugging it down slightly, watching the way her breast drops subtly. The small glimmer of her piercing makes my cock twitch underneath her. Gently, my fingers roll her already peaked nipple between them. Her head dropped back onto my shoulder at the feeling. 
I undo the clasp of her bra, watching the straps immediately slide down her arms a little. She pulls it off, letting it fall to the floor. Looking back into the mirror, all that’s left are the tights and her thong. We quietly hold eye contact through the mirror as I slide one of my hands up her thigh. 
“Watch how pretty you look when I touch you,” I whisper to her as I drag my fingers up the inside of her thigh, letting them slide in between her legs. She’s already trying to shift at the small amount of contact, so I add pressure as I pull my hand up the center of her. I linger over that sweet, sensitive spot that makes her squirm.
“Mmm, babe,” sneaks out of her. “Please.”
Teasing her a little by just adding a bit of pressure through her tights, slowly working her clit. I watch her in the mirror, her nipples peaked, her hands unsure of what to do right now. My free hand finds one of hers, holding it as my arm lays across her waist. 
She grabs my hand and moves it to her stomach, lifting the fabric of her thong slightly and guiding me to where she wants me. Feeling how wet she already is, sweet girl. 
“Jacob,” she whines. “I need you.”
The sweetest sound I could hear. 
“This isn’t enough?” I tease. I watched her reaction in the mirror but felt her hand tighten around mine. 
Pouting, she looks at me, “Baby.”
I sunk my middle finger into her, getting a delicious little moan out of her. I was curling it up, finding the right spot, and listening to how wet she got from it. Her breathing getting a bit louder. The way she’s shifting against me, it’s hard to deny the state I’m in. The hottest girl I’ve ever been with, writhing on my lap because of what my hand is doing– yes, I’m hard. 
I slow my hand down just to see what happens; her mouth drops open for a second as she looks at me. 
“I’ll let you come,” I mumble into her ear. “Just not yet.” 
My middle and ring finger slid into her, pulling a gasp out of her. I start pumping them into her quickly, curling them up and making her moan louder. Feeling her unravel in my lap, she’s so hot, Jesus Christ. 
I can feel her starting to flutter around me, and I lean into her ear again. “Almost, sweet girl.” 
She just whines in response. 
Letting go of her hand, I slide it down, rubbing her clit quickly. Her mouth is hung open, and her eyes are shut; I can feel how close she is.
“Open your eyes, hun,” I whisper. “Come for me.” 
Her eyes lock with mine when she gasps; I can feel her tighten around my fingers. Her string of ‘oh fuck’ and ‘yes baby’s ringing in the air. 
She slumps back against me once she’s come down, her body warm against me. I held her close for a minute, and she pressed her face under my chin. Leaving little kisses along my jaw. 
She whispers, “Wanna see how pretty I look with your cock in my mouth?” 
“Holy shit, Char,” comes out faster than I can think. She’s moving off my lap before I can say anything else, sitting on her knees in front of me. Her hands run up my thighs as she looks up at me. I could come just from the look in her eyes.
She hooks her fingers into the waistband of my boxers, pulling them down far enough for my cock to be freed. Quickly wrapping her lips around me, feeling her tongue swirl around, and I can’t stop the moans from coming out. 
I feel her hand slide up my chest for a second; she leaves it on my shoulder when she pulls back from me. 
Tapping my lip lightly, she looks up at me with those green eyes and whispers, “Open, baby.” My mouth falls open at her request; she slides two of her fingers into my mouth, and without hesitation, my lips close around them. Letting my tongue dance around them for a moment while she watched me, my breathing getting heavier. I didn’t realize that I- oh. 
“So good for me,” she whispers, pulling her hand back. My mouth hangs slightly open as she drags her finger down my bottom lip, her stare straight into my soul as she does it. I can feel the blood trying to decide if it wants to show up in my face or go straight to my cock, from her praise. Please keep telling me how good I am. Wrapping that hand around me, stroking a few times before letting her mouth sink back down onto me. 
I look into the mirror, watching the way her head and hand are moving. The fact that her tights are sheer is killing me because I can see her entire ass in the mirror. Carefully gathered all of her hair, brushed it away from her face, and wrapped it around my fist. The visual only makes it worse. 
She slowly takes more into her mouth; the feeling of her lips around me has me falling apart already. She lets herself sit like that for a second, lingering where I can feel her slight exhale against my stomach before her tongue starts to swirl around me a bit. Oh, fuck me. 
I whisper, “I don’t wanna come like this, hun.”
She pulls back, still gently stroking me as she looks up at me. 
“I have an idea,” she says. Standing in front of me, she slides her tights and thong down her legs and drops them on the floor next to her. “Scoot back a little, babe.”
I join her, pulling my boxers the rest of the way off. Moving myself back a little for her. 
She starts to straddle my lap again, still facing the mirror. Is she about to.. 
“Do you want me to..” I ask, pointing to my nightstand. 
“No, it’s okay,” she whispers back, lining me up with her as she sinks down onto me. My head falls back at the feeling. I keep myself propped up with one arm, but I move one hand onto her hip, holding on. She slowly lifts herself up and, just as slowly, lowers herself back down. We both sound like a mess at the moment. Her speed picks up as she bounces on me; my grip on her tightens. 
“God, baby,” she moans.
Without thinking, I groan, “Feels so good.” 
Her hands moving to my legs, she leans forward a little, and starts rolling her hips against me. The sound of her moans changed when she switched. Her mouth fell open as she kept rocking her hips slowly; I must be hitting the right spot. 
 “Use me, Char,” I mumbled, watching her writhe in pleasure. Watching the way her ass moves against me, softly grabbing at it. Her sweet face, her eyebrows pulled together as she moaned at the sensation.  
Her legs start to shake after a few minutes. I wrap my arms around her, standing up, bringing her with me. I moved us to the side of my bed before whispering in her ear, “Bend over for me?”
She immediately leans down, arching her back and wiggling her ass against me. Looking over, she can definitely still see the mirror.
I don’t know what came over me when I told her, “Eyes on me, honey.” 
She turns her head to the mirror, watching as I push back into her. Her mouth instantly opens at the feeling. My hands held her as I started to rock my hips into her hard and fast. I can feel her stare, and the feeling from it causes a smirk to lace my lips as I glance back over at her. Her foul moans rang throughout the room. 
“Do you like to watch while I fuck you?” I ask her. I don’t know where this is coming from.
She falls apart at the question, squeaking a small ‘yes.’
“Jake, you’re so– good, oh my god,” she whimpers out as I’m relentlessly thrusting into her. Reaching my hand down, rolling her clit between my fingers, watching her grip the comforter. Switching to tight, fast circles over it, she’s practically dripping for me and almost screaming my name at the feeling. 
I can’t come yet. I pull out of her, letting my fingers take over. She backs herself up, giving me better access to her. Leaning down and pressing a few messy kisses to each cheek before I dove in. Licking a long wide stripe up from her clit, shit, she’s so wet. My fingers are still pumping into her slowly, my tongue laps at her, and I want nothing more than to keep hearing my name fall out of her pretty mouth. 
I feel her tap my arm a few times, so I pull back, and she just falls over. Wrapping my arms around her legs, pulling her to the edge of the bed as I kneel. I keep my arms around her thighs, holding her up and placing a kiss against them before diving back in. 
I look up at her, seeing her eyes fixed on us in the mirror. Her hands knit themselves into my hair as my tongue practically spelled her name against her. It’s not long before her hips are trying to roll against my tongue, and who am I to stop her? My breathing shallow as she rides my face, waiting for her jaw to drop. Her grip on my hair tightens as it finally happens, lapping at her clit like my life depends on it and feeling her legs go limp in my arms as I’m setting her down. 
She crawls up to the pillows, flopping down with a few quiet giggles. Reaching out to me to join her. I take her in as I do, looking at ALL of her. This is the first time we’ve both been actually undressed. Every other time has been so heated that we don’t even care, so we’ve never taken the time to get this far. 
“You’re so beautiful,” I whisper to her, pulling her face to mine for a kiss. The flush of her cheeks mixed with the sparkle in her eyes, making my heart pound. 
She pulls back, glancing down before bringing her eyes back to mine, “You’re not so bad yourself.” Making us laugh into each other; I press my lips into hers as she giggles against me. I could do this forever.
I nudge her legs apart, moving in between them but never breaking the kiss. Making myself comfortable laying against her, keeping myself propped up on my elbows so I don’t crush her. We lay there pressing kiss after kiss into each other, her hands holding the sides of my throat, fingertips pressing into me harder with each kiss. 
When she starts shifting her hips against me, I push myself up, missing the feeling of her lips on mine instantly. 
“Look at me, honey,” I tell her, hovering over her. The moment her eyes meet mine, it feels like time has slowed. Lining myself up with her, but keeping eye contact this time. We’ve never done this. I start to push myself into her as my heart pounds, and her mouth opens slightly at the feeling; this feels different. Letting myself drop back down onto my elbows, my hands cradling her head. I start to move my hips into her, slow, crawling even. Our eyes stay locked on each other; why am I nervous?  Her hands grabbed the sides of my face, looking at me intently before pulling me into her. The moment I bottom out in her, a groan escapes me. 
Our mouths kept the same pace, slowly working against each other, letting out little moans into the kiss. The amount of contact is overwhelming, but I almost wish we were closer. Her sweet moans into my mouth, making my head spin. My hips stay at a slower pace; the feeling is indescribable but only lasts for a minute until she breaks the silence. 
“Mmm, baby,” she whispers into me. “Please, fuck me harder.”
I swear my cock got harder when she said it, if that was even possible at this point. 
I push myself up, pulling one of her legs up against my chest. Leaving a few small kisses against her ankle before tightening my grip around her thigh, driving myself into her. She loudly moans at the feeling, which only fuels me more. I wrap my arm underneath her, moving us further up the bed; I look down at her. I grab her hand, moving it up to grab the headboard.
“Hold on for me, hun,” I tell her. Leaning forward, I keep her leg against me, pushing myself into her, deep. Taking a breath before I start pounding into her. I watch as she falls apart; the sounds coming from her pretty mouth are foul. I try moving a bit faster, and her breathing picks up. 
“You're so good, baby,” she praises me. “Please, don’t stop.” 
I don’t think I could stop even if I wanted to. Slamming my hips into her, listening to the sounds coming from her, the visual of her tits bouncing as I do. Fuck.
“Louder for me, honey,” I coo into her ear. “Let the neighbors know how good it is.” 
Earning a loud moan when I push myself all the way into her quickly. I moved my hand to play with her clit, rubbing fast little circles around it; she was instantly more wet. 
“Oh my god,” she practically yells. Her voice is even louder when she lets out, “Jacob– yes, OH, oh my god, don’t stop.” 
I lean down, hovering over her ear, murmuring, “That’s my girl.” Seeing the goosebumps flood her skin at the comment.
“Yeah, you like that?” I ask quietly, slowing my hips for a minute and sliding my hand into hers. 
She just nods quickly, “Yes, say it again.”
“Oohhh,” I coo into her ear. “My girl needs me to talk her through it, huh?” 
Her free hand tangles itself into my hair as she moans at my voice. Fuck me, that’s hot. My hips rock into her slowly, and I hold her gaze; it feels intimate. 
“Tell me what you want,” I mumble to her. She moans in response, her eyebrows pulling together slightly, and her grip on my hand tightens. 
She finally lets out a small “you.” 
“You have me,” I tell her. She looks like she’s holding something back, “Use your words, honey.” 
“Want you to come with me,” she moans. 
The thought alone got me closer; I looked down at her. She’s so beautiful. I start thrusting into her a little faster, listening to her slowly unravel as I do. Her hands grab my shoulders and pull me back down to her; her moans are getting louder as I snap my hips a little harder. 
“I’m close,” falls out of my mouth. “Where should I..?”
Her eyes lit up as she stared at me. I can see her sitting on the edge of her orgasm with the way her mouth is just slightly open; she has to be right there.
“Come in me, baby,” she whispers, her eyes fixed on mine. “I wanna feel you.” Oh my god. 
I groan at her comments, feeling my cock start to twitch and my hips struggling to keep pace. I lean in, kissing her as my orgasm starts to hit. She lets out a delicious moan as I feel her tighten around me, and she whimpers into me, “Oh- Jacob.” 
Kissing her as we both finished felt surreal, feeling her hands hold onto me, pulling me closer to her like we weren’t already an inch away from each other. The mix of our moans in a sweet symphony. I had never finished in someone like that, and now I just want to only sleep with her if this is what my life could be. 
  I lean down, kissing her sweetly a few times. Peppering her face with little pecks as we lay there in a light layer of sweat. The little glimmer in her eyes as we’re still pressed together, her soft little laugh while she’s moving a piece of hair that’s sticking to my face. Oh, honey. 
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After a few minutes of her laughing at me trying to help her, we managed to make it to the bathroom. Thankfully, we still have a little bit before we have to worry about Josh coming home. I turned on the shower before grabbing the hair tie on the counter. I start to pull my hair up, staring at myself in the mirror as I do, becoming incredibly aware of how we’re both just.. naked. Why am I .. comfortable with this?  I glance over at her as I’m shifting the bun around on the top of my head to loosen it a little. The look in her eyes is hard to read, but she’s just watching me quietly. Not that I shouldn’t be, I mean.. We’ve slept together enough. This just feels a lot more vulnerable, and it just .. feels normal. 
I let her step into the shower first, her hand in mine for support. She practically pulls me in behind her, tucking herself into me. We just stand there for a minute, enjoying the warmth of the water. 
She tiptoes herself in a circle under the water, giggling as she does. I grab the body wash, pouring a fair amount into my hand, watching her spin around carefully a few times. 
“Here, let me help you,” I laugh, rubbing my hands quickly up and down her arms. Sliding the soap across her collarbones and letting both hands trail down to her tits really taking my time. I graze my thumbs over her piercings, smirking at her when I do. 
“Jacob cut it out,” she laughs, grabbing my hands and pulling them away. She turns around, and I massage her shoulders for a second. She lets out a little sigh at the feeling, letting my hands slowly work their way down her back. As soon as I hit her lower back, I couldn’t restrain myself any longer. Giggling as I glide my hands over her ass, knowing she’s probably going to yell at me again. 
“You need to focus, babe,” she scolds me; a laugh was in there, so she doesn’t entirely hate it. 
“You’re right,” I tell her, but not without slapping her ass. 
She whips around with her jaw dropped, “You little shit.” She grabs my arms, making us switch spots so I can be under the water for a minute. Taking her turn by pouring the body wash directly onto my chest, and it’s cold as hell. Frantically rubbing it all over me, I just laugh while she does. She takes her time scrubbing my arms, thoroughly coating them in soap and dragging them down to my hands. God, she’s so fucking cute. 
She grabs my shoulders, forcing me to turn around. Her hands are still moving quickly as she scrubs little circles down my back. I hear her little giggle before she fully grabs my ass, squeezing it a few times. I turn just enough for water to run over my shoulder, washing away the soap as she’s having her fun. 
“Hey now,” I mumble, reaching back and grabbing her hands, pulling them around me.  
Her forehead leans against me, her hands running up and down my chest. She slides her hands dangerously low. Lord, help me. 
“Hun,” I let out, probably sounding a bit concerned. Her hand was eerily close to my cock, and I was fighting every demon not to get hard. 
She kisses the base of my neck, “What?” her taunting little tone laces it. The sigh that falls out of my body when she wraps her hand around me, gently stroking me as I get harder. 
“What are you–” I start, but losing my breath when she picks up her pace. “Char–” 
She lets go, grabbing my hips to turn me back to her, but her hand wraps back around me quickly. Stepping closer, she leans up to kiss me, her hand moving down the length of my cock at a painfully slow pace. 
“I just think you deserve a little more,” She says against my lips. Her thumb rubbed over the tip of my cock, making me moan into her. “Feel good, baby?” She moves back a little, pulling my hips with her. 
‘Mhm’ slips out of me; she can’t be real. Her lips found their place back on mine; my mind wandered to the night I got off to the thought of her. Now she’s here, in the shower with me, and she started this. The feeling of her hand on me, the taste of her on my lips, her fucking voice. Little whimpers are escaping me left and right; I can feel her smiling into me over it. Despite the fact we just had sex, great sex, mind you, I’m already close. Something about her is just so different. 
She leans into my ear, whispering, “Come for me, Captain.” 
I feel my orgasm start to release, her lips pressing into mine again as I do. This girl is my dream, holy shit. She slowly works me through it, giggling once she looks down. I scoot out of the way so she can clean herself off, kissing the side of her head while she does. 
I get out first, holding out a towel for her as she shuts the water off. Wrapping herself up, I quickly dry myself off. She scoots herself closer to me, snuggling herself against my chest. I throw my arms around her, my towel almost covering the two of us together. 
“It’s cold out here,” she giggles into me. Feeling her body shiver against me. I swear everything she does makes my heart feel weird. 
“I’ll keep you warm, don’t worry,” I mumble to her, her face tucked into my neck as I rub my hands over her arms and back to warm her up again. 
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After some mild convincing, we made it back into my room. I watch as she slides her panties up her legs, leaving minimal room for the imagination with the way they frame her ass perfectly. I just pull on some boxers because, at this point, I feel like she would laugh at me if I tried to be any more covered than that.  She comes back over, crawling into bed with me. 
“You’re just gonna.. sleep like this?” I ask, looking at her bare chest as she comes closer. 
Her arm slides up my chest as she makes herself comfortable against me, “Mhm. Is that okay?” 
“Hun, I will never pass up the opportunity— I just wasn’t expecting it.” 
She draws little shapes on my chest when she timidly lets out, “Just wanna feel extra close, I don’t know.” 
“Well, in that case,” I turned towards her,  grabbing one of her legs and pulling her as close to me as possible. Her leg drapes over my hip, and I slide one of mine between hers. Her head laying against my bicep, both of her dainty little hands holding my free one. I can practically feel her heart beating with how intertwined we are. 
She leans forward, kissing me a few times before settling back into her spot. Pressing lazy kisses against my arm every so often, she glances up at me.
“This is nice,” she whispers. “Thank you for everything today, baby.”
Her little smile makes me nervous, pulling her hands up and littering her knuckles with little kisses as my heart feels like it’s falling out of my body. 
“Of course,” I whisper back. 
She moves closer, somehow, and tucking her face back into my neck with her chest pressed against mine. My arm gently wraps around her shoulders, keeping her close. I can feel her breathing against my skin and how she’s smiling into me. I can feel her eyelashes brush against me when she blinks. The scent of my body wash on her ignited a little fire in my stomach. She snaked her arm around me, holding onto my shoulder, mindlessly leaving little comforting scratches as we lay there when I felt her lips press into the side of my throat. 
The chills sent through my body at that moment; I couldn’t describe the level of bliss I felt like I was in. Being able to hold her like this, the fact she’s enjoying it enough to keep tangling us into each other even further. I wanted nothing more than to lie here, listening to her breathe and feel her skin on mine. She’s so warm against me. My mind wanders as she aimlessly plays with my hair, and letting eyes fall shut. 
My mind is racing with thoughts about her and how we’re in this position. But it suddenly feels like everything comes to a screeching halt, all the noise stops, and my heart pounds as it sits there, front and center in my mind— 
 I think I love her. 
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Chapter Eighteen
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via-fm · 2 days
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making a mirador meme everyday until they announce the ep/album
day 119
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sacredthethreadgvf · 22 hours
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Oh
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traffic-was-a-b1tch · 17 hours
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wrapped around your finger
(jake kiszka x reader) 18+
author’s note: I RECOMMEND NOT READING THE SUMMARY BEFORE READING THIS FIC! if you want to have the full effect of the story, don’t spoil it for yourself! now for those of you who don’t know, along with gvf, I am a huge 5 seconds of summer fan. I wrote this fic based on one of their unreleased songs (my favorite of all time), wrapped around your finger. I recommend reading the fic first and then listening to the song on youtube after. I loveddd the experience of writing this fic because I got to live out the events of the song through my own character and I think that’s always fun! anyway, enjoy the story!
summary: jake takes you out for a night you’ll never forget. but when the morning comes, will he still be the man you thought he was?
warnings: SMUT!, unprotected p in v (WRAP IT UP!), oral (f rec), loss of v card (unknowingly), cursing, theft, angst, arguing, misogyny, underage drinking (I do not condone)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
the clock read 6:37 pm and you were just coming back up to your room after mom’s chicken and rice dinner.
you had to kick a few boxes of pictures to the side on your way up the stairs. the new house was pretty but still unfamiliar. it had only been 4 months since your parents uprooted you from everything you knew and moved the family to california for your dad’s new job. the transition was tough at the beginning, but now was just boring. you had nothing to do. ever.
you plopped down on the edge of your bed that wasn’t covered in papers. you had decided to leave all your homework piled there, too lazy and overwhelmed to continue anymore. if mrs. turner thought that you were gonna finish her set of 50 algebraic expressions by monday, she was on crack. it was friday, damn it. why was everyone being so freaking difficult lately? couldn’t you catch a break? you eyed the pictures displayed on your wall, the contrast and vibrancy made you break into a small smile. you wished you were out taking pictures. you hadn’t got a chance yet, to capture your new city on film. it was calling to you…but so was your notebook and pen. you glared at them, frustrated. you needed something other to do than homework right now, but still you reluctantly grabbed them, starting on the next problem.
you don’t even know how much time had passed while you were scribbling math before you heard the tiny click. perking your ears up, you looked around to see what made the noise. you scanned around you. nothing in your room was out of the ordinary. the closet door was open as well, letting you see clearly that nothing was hiding in it. you suspiciously looked around one more time before going back to your equation.
so, if x equals the equivalent of 172 radical 4…
another click.
you recognized the direction the sound was coming from then, head focusing in on the window near your bed. you waited, wanting to see what was going on. after a few seconds, a pebble came flying up and smacked into the glass.
you got up and walked over to the window, peeking out to see if you could catch a glimpse of the person, at least you hoped it was a person, down below. a shadowed body was barely visible, the face too dark to tell any features.
damn it. you were hoping you wouldn’t have to do this. you were barely dressed in pjs, definitely not for unknown guests, and you had no makeup on.
slowly, you unlocked the window and pulled up, sticking your head out. just then, a rock came hurling up at you fast. you gasped and ducked, the solid circle traveling through the air and into your room. luckily for you, it landed on the carpeted floor so it didn’t make much noise. the last thing you needed was your parents to know someone was outside trying to get your attention this late in the evening.
you hesitantly peeked your head back out, seeing a pair of empty hands waving.
“hey! sorry!” a man’s voice called up, too loud when considering your parents’ keen ears.
“shhh”, you whisper-yelled back, “who’s down there?”
“it’s jake, from english”, he lowered his voice a little, “sorry for being so loud, I just wanted to see what you were doing tonight.”
you were a bit shocked and wondered if you had heard correctly. he wanted to see what you were doing tonight? what did that mean? I mean, you and jake weren’t particularly friends. sure, you saw him in class or the halls and he joked about teachers with you, but you wouldn’t say you two were friends. you definitely weren’t on the “show up at my door after dinner and throw rocks at my window, why don’t you” level. so, you had no clue why he would be here. you knew you didn’t have friends yet, but a childish thought popped in your brain. what if he liked you? no, that’s stupid. you hadn’t ever had much action back home anyway, so to think he liked you already when you had just gotten here was a delusion. but still, the question stood. why was he here?
“well, I was working on mrs. turner’s packet. I’m probably going to try to finish it tonight”, you hesitated, “why? what are you doing here?”
he finally came into view, stepping underneath the light shining from your bedroom. you took him in and became almost speechless. he was clad in dark denim jeans and a cream long-sleeve shirt halfway tucked in, buttoned only up to his nipples, where they would be anyway (you weren’t thinking about his nipples, definitely not), and completed with a ball cap. you had never really saw him like this before, relaxed and rugged. maybe it was just the soft yellow lights from your room that made him look this handsome. definitely the lights.
“well I, uh, was in the area”, he began, “you know, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out?”
what? the hell? you couldn’t help but think that jake being outside your window asking you to hang out was just a cruel joke. or maybe, just maybe, it was fate? what if him being here was for a reason? what if this random hang out with a new classmate would be the best thing for you? the thought ate at your logic-loving brain. you had to tell yourself to shut up.
“um”, you thought for a second, “I’m not exactly dressed to go anywhere.” you laughed a bit awkwardly, looking at your pink rainbow pajama set.
“come on”, he urged, opening his arms out wide, “live a little.”
his words hit you. you hadn’t really had a social life lately, having no real time to get friends or join extracurriculars. you almost gasped when you realized.
you were lame.
sure, you never were the life of the party, even back home. but you wanted to be. you wanted to be the girl that people envied. with this move, you could make cooler decisions and nobody would know better.
“you know what, fine. where are we going?”
he broke out into a grin, “it’s a surprise.”
a twinge of doubt and fear hit your brain but you shook it away. maybe he was right. you needed to live a little.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you changed quickly into a pair of jean shorts and a white t-shirt. grabbing your phone, you sneaked down the stairs, past your parents’ room, and out the door.
you met him in the backyard, his back leaned up against the side of your white house. he seemed a bit taller than you remembered, towering over you.
he smirked, “you ready?”
smiling slyly back, you replied with a nod.
he cocked his head to the side, pointing to the direction you two were going to walk. you followed him, still a bit nervous but powering through. you hated the idea of not being cool enough to do fun, spontaneous things like this. he led you to the road and you started making the trek to wherever you were going.
“soooo”, he put his hands in his pockets, “where did you move from?”
“georgia.”
“ahhh, southern girl huh?”
you laughed, “yeah I guess. not too obvious?”
“nah. I would’ve guessed east coast, but now that I look at you”, he took in your appearance up and down, “you have that southern belle kinda look.”
you rolled your eyes with a smile, “oh really? what about me says southern belle?”
he shrugged, “you look sweet.”
you shut up at that. you weren’t sure why a small compliment from him would shake you up so much, but you couldn’t deny how attracted you were to him.
he chuckled, “what? I can’t say that? ok.” he shook his head with amusement, “you have any plans coming up?”
you shook your head almost immediately and laughed, “I don’t do much.”
he smiled and laughed with you, “well, there’s a party tomorrow night at jenny stewart’s house. I heard it was gonna be fun so i’ll probably go. you should come, it’s at 9.”
you fought the urge to raise your eyebrows in surprise at him. was he really flirting? instead you just nodded and said “maybe.”
he smirked and changed the subject, “so how are you liking santa cruz?”
you reflected on the time you’ve spent here and became underwhelmed. “well, the people are nice”, you slightly tilted your head towards jake, making him smile. “and…I don’t know. I haven’t made many friends yet and kinda get caught up in school, I guess. I haven’t had a chance to really experience everything here.”
“mmm. well, then I guess it was a good thing that you have me tonight.”
he stopped at a crosswalk and grabbed your shoulders. it caught you by surprise, and you tried not to shiver at his touch. “I have a question for you.”
“yes?” you answered a bit too quickly.
jake looked down before making eye contact, “can I have you tonight?” you immediately raised your eyebrows in confusion, and he continued, shaking his head. “can I have your time? show you what is great about this place?”
a small smile tugged at your mouth from his thoughtfulness and you nodded.
“yeah?” his eyes looked hopeful and sweet as he became excited, nearly jumping for joy. he settled a bit before saying, “ok, first things first:”, his eyebrows jumped, “race ya.”
he took off down the crosswalk, the sign still illuminated with a red hand. he was fearless, dodging two cars to make it to the other side. before you could talk yourself out of it, you chased him, nearly screaming when a car honked his horn at you loudly. when you caught up, you pushed him playfully and he laughed heartily. the rest of the walk was about 10 minutes, silence non-existent. he’d managed to get you to open up. you talked about your life in georgia, your old friends, your school. he filled you in on what happened in santa cruz before you. the conversation was easy and fun, flowing freely.
he led you to a mcdonald’s, the golden arches shining above you. this was a bit surprising, as you didn’t exactly picture a mcdonald’s being a particularly important part of santa cruz.
“follow my lead”, he smirked as he pulled the door and went inside.
there were a few employees inside mopping and a couple in the kitchen. jake swaggered up to the register and dinged the bell on the counter in front of him. one of the employees in the kitchen walked over and mindlessly asked what he would like to order.
“two big macs please”, jake said a little too confident, “and two drinks.”
the worker handed you two the cups and left to get the burgers.
“hey”, he whispered in your ear, “get me a coke, will ya? i’m gonna initiate phase 2.”
you looked at him questioning, but he waved you off and you listened. you went to the fountain, filled your cups with soda, and when you turned back around you saw what jake was up to. he was slinking to the part of the store that an employee had just mopped and, because there was no wet floor sign, turned back to you and winked. with one move he flung his head back and pulled his feet up, falling on his back, hard. you put your arm over your mouth to cover your shocked mouth. you started to giggle a bit at what just happened and jake, groaning, jerked his head at you to come over. you got the hint and gasped before setting the drinks down and rushing over to him.
“oh my gosh! are you ok?” you rubbed his arm as he twisted and turned in mock pain.
“oh no! no, no, no! I am not ok! who would have known that they were mopping there? there was no sign! oh, my back! having no sign for a slippery floor is so dangerous for your customers!”
you nodded and then shook your head, “so dangerous!”
by this time, all the employees had stopped to see this and the manager had come out to see what was going on.
the manager rubbed his bald head as he took in the scene and asked, “are you ok, sir?”
“no”, jake answered, “i’m not ok! I got hurt because of your negligence! i’m gonna sue!” jake crossed his arms and you followed, trying to seem genuinely mad.
“well, don’t do that!”, the manager bent to help jake up as he chuckled uncomfortably. “we can offer you coupons or free food or-“
jake, standing with a stuck up look on his face, cut him off, “I would imagine that my meal today is free!” he thought for a second. “in fact, I would like additional food to help with”, he fought back giggles, “my healing.”
“of course, of course”, the manager snapped his fingers at the employees. “whatever you need, sir!”
you two proceeded to order just about everything on the menu.
“…and two mcflurry’s”, you added at the end. out of the corner of your eye you saw jake smile at you, full of an emotion but you weren’t sure which it was.
only a few minutes later, all your food was in bags and you were walking out the door with too much to carry and zero money lost. as soon as you two were out the door and around the corner, you started laughing hysterically.
“when you- I didn’t know that you would- that was-“, you laughed.
he did too, smiling at you and then doing something unexpected: he put his arm around you. you tried not to let it phase you, clutching the food a bit tighter, but you loved the weight of his arm around your shoulder.
“you know, i’m surprised that you got into it as much as you did. you don’t seem like a troublemaker.”
you rolled your eyes, “well, i’ve never done that before, that’s for sure. but, I don’t mind a bit of trouble.”
he smirked at you, impressed, “good. we’re gonna get in way more trouble tonight, just wait.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you eventually turned a few corners and reached a big chain link fence. you couldn’t see what was beyond it very well, as there were quite a few buildings blocking your view.
he grabbed the bottom corner of the chain, which had been cut, and pulled it back. he looked back at you with a grin, “you ready?”
you couldn’t really believe you were about to follow a cute boy you didn’t know, who you talked to about your past and robbed a mcdonald’s with, through a cut fence to a unknown place.
you laughed a bit through your words at the absurdity of the situation, “yeah, I am.”
he offered his hand, his eyes hopeful. it occurred to you then that you were definitely going to take his hand. you couldn’t stop the night, too far in to quit now. even if you could, there was no part of you that would decline. you were his for the night.
you accepted his hand and he smiled. he bent down, squeezing himself through before helping you, the sharp edges around you catching on your clothes. you ease out and grab the food that you left on the other side. once you were all together, he stopped you before you could move.
“ok, do you know where we are?”
you looked around yourself breifly before answering, “nope.”
“good. i’m gonna go do something really quick and I need you to stay here.”
you nodded, a little sad he was leaving you.
“promise?” his eyes searched your face for sincerity.
“I promise.” you smiled and fought the urge to tell him that you wanted to promise your life to him. you kept all your thoughts inside as he grabbed the food and raced away through the alley of the building.
you shook at your thoughts, “ugh! stop it! you don’t know this guy! you need to stop before you embarrass yourself.” you took a deep breath, closing your eyes to center yourself. opening them back up, you saw jake coming back through the alley. his sleeves were rolled up and his ball cap had turned around, now facing backwards as he jogged up to meet you. you nearly passed out. what was it you said about not embarrassing yourself…
“you ready?” he pulled you out of your trance and you had to remember to answer.
nodding, you watched his body get behind you and place his strong hands over your eyes.
“ok, we’re gonna walk forward, but go slow.” his voice was right on your ear, low and raspy. you could barely concentrate, but you put one foot in front of the other and walked.
he led you through the alley, and from there you had no idea where you were. you relied on him to guide you, leaning back on him a bit. you almost tripped over a rock of some kind, letting out a funny scream-like noise. he chuckled in your ear behind you, making you almost shiver at his voice. god, this was getting hard.
“and… stop.”
finally, he pulled you back and stopped walking. he kept his hands over you eyes as he talked.
“before I show you, what do you hear?”
you listened closely.
“wind.”
“good”, he praised and you tried not to smile. “what do you smell?”
you sniffed the air, slowly.
“um”, you giggled at your answer, “fishy air?”
he laughed deeply in your ear, “good. now, what can you taste?”
you opened your mouth and stuck your tongue out a little.
“hmmm, salt?”
“very good. now, are you ready to see?”
“for goodness sake, jake, we’ve been walking forever and I played your games, I think i’m ready-“ you tugged his hands off your eyes and lost all your words as you took in where you were.
the beach was beautiful under the moonlight, lighting up the waves as they crashed and sprayed. the water met the sand in a beautiful blue-tinted dark spot, and a few feet in front of it lied a blanket and our mcdonald’s bags. it was a picnic on the beach under the moon. you wanted someone to pinch you.
“jake- I-“, you couldn’t find the words if you tried.
“do you like it?”, his voice hopeful while his fingers grazed your arms lightly, his presence ever comforting behind you.
you looked back at him, “I love it.”
he grinned and grabbed your hand, leading you to the picnic.
“where did you find a blanket here?”
he smiled fondly, as if at memories you had brought up with your question. “my family used to come here all the time, so I always loved it. now that, you know, i’m grown and we don’t go out much, I come by myself. I keep a blanket in one of those lockers over there, just in case.” he pointed to a wall of lockers for people to stow their belongings while at the beach.
“and what about…“, you answered your own question by turning around and seeing what the buildings blocking your view of the beach were. “suites and private beach houses? wow, people have money.”
he laughed and helped you sit down on the blanket, fingers accidentally brushing your lower back. you locked eyes at the touch, dangerously fast, and you looked away before anyone could say anything. if you would’ve stared into his eyes for just a second longer, who knows would’ve happened.
finally, you both sat and got comfortable on the blanket over the squishy sand. he frowned, sighed, and shook his head.
your eyebrows furrowed at his actions, “what?”
he sighed again and made eye contact, “i’m just-“. he contemplated his words, looking up into the sky and then dropping his head to the sand before looking back at you. “i’m just really…”, his eyes danced around your face as he leant in, almost unaware he was doing so. it seemed like he was being pulled towards you, and you back to him. you followed his lead and leant in a little. he licked his lips, smiled sheepishly, and pulled away. “i’m just really hungry.”
you both nodded fast and you tried to shake the memory from your head. giving him a sweet smile, you grabbed a big mac out of the bag.
you two ate and talked for a good hour. half of the humongous bags were empty and there was nothing but happiness radiating from your spot on the beach. he had found himself on his elbows laying back, and you on one elbow looking down at him. he was so fucking charming. and it was going to be the death of you. you laughed at his horrible jokes and he smiled up at you, putting a fry between his teeth. you tried your best not to stutter or lose your train of thought, but it was so hard with him. he was just- perfect. and that was a dangerous thought.
“so”, you began after catching your breath from the joke, “what do you want to do? in life, I mean.”
he thought for a second, his head moving side to side. “realistically? or my dream?”
you smiled, “your dream.”
he grinned back, “musician.”
you rolled your eyes, laughing, “is that why I always see you playing that sg?”
his brows furrowed as a questioning look donned his face. “you see me play? when?”
your face blushed a bit, realizing how creepy the next sentence was going to sound. “after lunch. my next class is- well- when I leave- I pass the music hall on the way to my health class.”
he smiled at your embarrassment. “and you spy on me?”
“no! no, of course not! I just- see you through the window,” you backtracked, “like because it’s really big and I just catch a glimpse. I don’t watch you or anything-“
he threw his head back and laughed. you grunt in frustration, nothing you say making the situation sound less weird.
“it’s ok, it’s ok”, he fought to stop laughing, “I know you weren’t being creepy.” then, he raised an eyebrow at you. “wait, how did you know it was an sg?”
you shook your head, “my dad is a collector. it’s dumb but he always made me go with him to look in the vintage shops.”
jake smirked, “impressive.”
you shrugged, “I don’t know about that.”
he eyed you, “what about you? what’s your dream?”
you felt yourself get bubbly just thinking about it, a smile creeping on your lips. “a photographer.”
his eyes got bright, “pictures, huh? take one of me right now!” he stood, kicking up a bit of sand as he did, and struck a pirate-like pose.
you laughed and grabbed your phone, lining up the lighting and snapping a few shots.
he sat back down and urged you to show him, laughing at the situation. when you did, the joking left his face and was replaced by an expression of amazement and confusion.
“fuck, these are actually really good.” he looked up at you, “how did you get the shadows and highlights with just a phone camera?”
you shrugged, “i’m always just taking the picture by feeling. I get inspired and then it always just leads me to the perfect shot.”
he shook his head, still surprised at the quality, “this is perfect, don’t you realize? you could take pictures at my concerts!”
you laughed and nodded, “sure, jake.”
“i’m serious! you said you need inspiration and my music, especially the guitar solos, will definitely inspire you.” he tilted his head back and added, “plus I look super sexy when I play.”
you wanted to laugh, to play it off, but you didn’t want to admit how much that image was affecting you. you just decided to roll your eyes and shake your head, pushing the thought away.
“promise! say that you’ll be my personal photographer!” his enthusiasm was hard to turn down.
giggling, you agreed, “fine. but no nudes.”
he busted out laughing and shoved you.
after the laughs subsided, there was silence for the first time in the night, both of you too caught up in the eyes of the other. the tension was dangerous, waiting to erupt. still, there was a question still eating at you.
“jake?”
“yeah?”
“why this tonight? why me and the beach? why are you doing this?”
jake studied you, eyes drifting up and down your body. he motioned for you to come closer, his breath tickling your ear, “why not?”
you slowly turned your face to his, not backing up. you were eye to eye, foreheads almost touching and lips just inches from each other.
you broke the trance by placing a finger on his lips and pushing him backward. “race ya”, you challenged and took off towards the beach.
you heard him laugh from behind you, getting closer. you were about ankle deep in the water when he grabbed you around your stomach from behind, lifting you up and spinning you. water splashed up on both of you, drenching your clothes. giggles plagued both of you as he spun and then set you down.
you turned and saw his face…and you don’t think you’ve ever been the same since.
he was smiling, big. his hat had flown off in the run, the wind blowing his shirt open. his hair was flowing messily and his skin almost glowing in the moonlight. he was perfect. so amazing that you couldn’t find words to describe it. you hoped right then and there that this would last forever. you weren’t sure you’d ever get him out of your brain.
it was then you realized that your shirt had been soaked by the ocean, the white cloth sticking to the curves of your torso and becoming see-through. you looked down to see your light gray bra showing through, and looked back up to see jake’s smile gone. it was replaced with a look of deep desire. his mouth slightly parted, his eyes locked on your wet body. you stared at each other for a minute, your salty hair whipping at your face.
he came close, brushing a piece of your hair behind your ear, his hand resting on the side of your face. he leaned closer and nudged your noses, almost asking permission.
“jake…”, you trailed, begging him to keep going.
he came in so close that your lips were grazing each other, pausing just a second before closing the painful gap. he kissed you softly, and you sighed into it.
you knew then.
it didn’t matter anymore.
it doesn’t matter what else happens or doesn’t happen tonight.
you were his.
the connection was complete.
after a few seconds of sweetness, you kiss him harder. his hands find your waist, pulling you into his body. your hands hold his face on yours, slightly in his hair. he continues to kiss you deeply, hands roaming to your ass and then your legs, picking them up so he could carry you back to the blanket.
he made haste, nearly tripping from the sand on the way, making you squeal. he laid you down on the blanket gently, you legs wrapping around his waist naturally. you both giggled at the position you had found yourselves in, feeling the excitement and adrenaline. you could feel his hands shaking as they trailed up and down your sides. the kisses grew hungrier, both of you getting impatient. he disconnected your lips and sat back, panting. you watched from your laid position as he unbuttoned whatever was left of his shirt and shouldered it off. then he bent back down and lifted the edge of the shirt sticking to your stomach, pulling it up and over your head. your bra was removed shortly after, being tossed to the side. your chest laid bare in front of him, his breathing shook as he whispered under his breath, “you’re fucking gorgeous.” with that, he kissed you hard again, hands slowly cupping your breasts. you moaned softly in his mouth and it was obviously too much for him to handle, as he immediately fumbled for your jean shorts’ button. he undid them and tugged them off fast, throwing them to the side. he groaned as he took you in, only clad in your underwear. it was a white thong decorated with cherries and jake laughed when he saw it.
“cherries?” he smirked as he began to kiss his way down your chest, licking your nipple. you gasped and moaned as he continued down your stomach and reached the top of the thong.
he smirked and looked up at you. god, what a sight that was. his hair messed, his eyes dark and mischievous. he looked up at you like you were something to eat. and god, you hoped he had an appetite. “I wonder if you taste like cherries, too?”
you were speechless as his fingers hooked into them, inching them down and tossing them over his shoulder. automatically, your legs came together at the brisk air on your private parts.
“ah, come on baby”, he shook his head, “let me see her.”
he made eye contact with you and bit his lip as he placed each of his hands on your knees, prying them apart slowly. his eyes flicked down to your center and he took a throaty breath before he dipped his head down between your legs. hooking his arms around your thighs, he looked at you before lowering his face down and licking a long stripe up your core.
you moaned and threw your head back as he licked and sucked, already feeling like it was too good.
“fuck, you do taste like cherries”, he smirked, licking his lips, before diving back in. he teased you, going fast and then slow.
“jake, please”, you begged.
“what baby? use your words, honey.”
he stopped teasing and made out with you, only taking breaths to kiss your inner thigh. you squirmed and whimpered, his grip just getting tighter. your hands tangled in his hair and pulled, causing him to grunt and flick his tongue over you faster.
“jake- too much. I can’t-“, you pleaded.
“you can. you will.” he said it as a promise, like he had already made up his mind about it.
jake went faster, harder. he was making true on that promise. you felt your muscles tighten and your mouth fell open. you screamed as the orgasm hit you. he continued for just a minute more, working you through the rest of it, until you started to run from the overstimulation. he pulled back and admired the mess you made.
“fuck, cherry”, he panted, smiled, and came up to kiss you. “I almost couldn’t stop.”
you moaned as he kissed you, beginning to feel something hard and hot on your thigh. you gasped breathlessly, his bulge evidently turning you on. you reached down and touched him through his jeans. you didn’t even use much pressure and he was already groaning. too worked up for his own good, he tugged down his pants, and you couldn’t help but run your hands across his toned chest. as he removed his underwear, you sucked a small hickey into his neck as a little memento to remember your first time together. you were certain that this wouldn’t be the last.
jake finally got fully naked, lining himself up with you. your eyes met and he slowly started to push into you. he sighed in relief, like he was returning to his home inside your body. the stretch was painful at first, as he wasn’t small by any means, but when he started to move the pain went away. it felt so good. too good.
“fuck, baby. you’re gonna be the death of me.” he moved slowly, all the way in and almost all the way out.
the sensation was unlike anything you’d ever felt, the pleasure taking over your brain and making you a mindless zombie.
“jake, oh my-“, you couldn’t even finish, cut off by a powerful thrust that hit a spot in you that you didn’t know existed.
“I know, baby. give it to me.”
the rhythm got faster, fueled by the pleasure radiating from both of you. soon, he was fucking you hard. the sound of slapping skin and moans mixed with the background noise of waves crashing against the sand was intoxicating.
“oh fuck, baby. are you close?” he was falling apart, evident by the squeak in his voice.
“yes! fuck, jake!” you could barely get the words out, too caught up in the feeling. the warm buildup started in your belly and you knew it wouldn’t be long. his grunts became faster and louder as he pummeled into you as hard as he could. he looked you in the eyes and moaned your name loudly, like he didn’t care who heard him.
“jake…”, you groaned, feeling the buildup get to the edge.
“oh, fuck. me too. show me, baby. show me how good you feel. cum for me.” he groaned at the thought of you falling apart on him.
you did as he said. moments later, you felt like you were engulfed by a wave of pleasure so intense you shook. you never broke eye contact as you moaned his name and squeezed his dick like a vice.
“fuck-“, he came with a groan. he shuddered and panted as he painted your walls. his eyes drifted away and he hung his head in the crook of your neck.
still inside you, he whispered in your ear, “you’re so amazing.”
you felt a smile creep on your face as you scoffed lovingly. he brought himself back up to look at you, brushing a piece of your hair away from your face. the smiles on both your faces were sweet and sappy, taking in the warmth.
you wished that this moment would never end. this right here? this was heaven. in jake’s arms, on the beach, orgasm haze washing over you both. it was all you’d ever want, you were sure of it. all you’d ever want is him.
he pulled out, hissing at the feeling, and tearing you away from your thoughts. “so, let’s get you cleaned up then.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
he used a napkin from the food bag to clean you off and then you both got dressed. pulling on your shirt, you saw jake glance at his phone.
“oh shit. it’s 12:06 in the morning. I gotta get home.”
“oh”, you tried to hide your disappointment, “that’s ok. I probably should too.” you smiled, walking over and pulling him into a hug, and he smiled back.
the walk back to your house took almost 30 minutes but you welcomed the time, dreading the moment he’d have to leave. you talked the whole way back, laughing about the night and things that happened at school lately. you held hands, swinging them like elementary schoolers with their first boyfriend.
you reached your house and turned to face him, sad. “I don’t want you to go.”
a small, empathetic smile tugged at his lips as he pushed you back towards your home. “go. you don’t want your parents to wake up and find you gone, now do you?”
you looked him in his dark brown eyes and wished you could tell him that all you wanted was a hug from him. all you want is a life with him. he became all you wanted within a few hours, sweeping you off your feet instantly. you needed him.
but all you could manage to say was, “ok.”
you kissed him one more time, softly. he smiled and kissed your back, his hand coming around to grab your ass. you squealed and pushed him away.
“stop it! my parents are like a foot away.”
he laughed, “fine. i’ll see you around.”
and with that, he turned and walked away. you figured you should do the same too, backing up slowly. you got to your front door and turned back to look at him. you hoped to see him looking back at you, but he was gone. frowning, you slipped inside. quietly, you made it to your bedroom and sat on your bed.
holy fuck. what just happened? this was the greatest night of your life.
you tore off your still-wet clothes and grabbed a towel before running to the bathroom to shower. the warm water ran down your body, washing away the sand and salt. you could still feel his hands on you, and you smiled at the reminder. when you were done washing your face, you went back to your bedroom.
you gasped when you stepped on something unexpected, but then smiled when you realized what it was. it was the rock from earlier tonight; the one jake threw. you smiled and picked it up, putting it on your dresser next to your favorite pictures. it was now going to be displayed with your favorite things. when you laid down, the comfortable bed swallowed you up as you thought about the night. about him. about jake.
you smiled and yawned, the happy memories and warm sheets lulling you to sleep.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you woke up the next day sore. you sat up and stretched, but your mind started to wander and soon you remembered the fun of last night. it filled your heart with happiness and all you wanted to do was see him again. but, in the haze of the night, you never exchanged numbers.
that’s when it occurred to you. jenny stewart’s party. he said it would be tonight at 9 and he’d probably be there. you almost patted yourself on the back for remembering. you looked over to your clock and almost screamed when you saw that it was noon. you slept late. too late. it was time to start preparing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
you had jumped in the shower again, and this time it was an everything shower.
you washed and conditioned your hair thoroughly, did full skincare, exfoliated, and shaved everything. like everything, everything. when you got out, you wiped your hand on the foggy mirror and brushed your teeth to finish the routine.
you ran to your room and started picking out something to wear. you started by grabbing a lacy, black matching set. last night you weren’t prepared, but tonight you would be. you put them on, the black bra pushing your tits up perfectly. the lacy panties left nothing to the imagination, but that was the point. next, you turned to your closet to find a dress. this would probably take a while.
it took a good minute of searching before you found what you were looking for. it was a black dress covered with cherries. how perfect. you thought about how he’d love the subtle callback to last night’s events and giggled. you put everything on and smiled at how you looked. he was gonna love it.
next was makeup. you did a subtle look, swiping a bit of sparkle on your eye and blush on your cheek. the mascara you used made your eyelashes 10x longer and you batted them at yourself in the mirror. you added a bit of sparkly gloss as a finishing touch. you felt like a little girl, giddy to see your crush.
by the time you were finished with everything and put on comfortable shoes, it was time to go. you said bye to your parents, saying you were going to a study group with friends. you tried not to feel upset when they raised their eyebrows at you having friends, and just ran out the door.
the walk there would only be a few minutes because jenny lived in the neighborhood next to yours. you checked your phone and saw that you were gonna be a few minutes late, but that was ok.
as you walked up to her house, you saw that the party was in full swing. there were people in the yard and on her wrap-around porch, already tipsy and talking. you excused yourself by them and made your way up the steps and to the door. the music bumped inside the house, rap being played out of a speaker. you walked into her house and saw you were in the kitchen. jenny’s house was big and very nice, but it was a mess from the party. there was beer bottles everywhere, liquor spilt here and there, and tortilla chips spilling out of bowls. the granite island in the middle of the kitchen had all the booze on top of it, and you realized then that you had never really been to a high school party. not a real one anyway. the only party you were used to going to had punch and a piñata. this was a real party.
you decided to keep your focus on finding jake, looking around the room. you tried to make your way to the living room, accidentally bumping into a very drunk jenny stewart.
“heyyyyyyy girl!” she slurred her words and waved at you.
“hey, jenny”, you tried not to laugh at her state, “have you seen jake?”
“jake kiszka? yeah he’s here.” she almost turned away before she whipped back around and grabbed your arm, “wait. whyyyy?”, she said in a flirty tone. “are you guys togetherrrr?”, she smirked.
you blushed and looked down, “I mean, kinda.”
“shut upppp! go get him, girl!” with that, she pushed you towards the living room.
you laughed and continued on, smiling as you came into the living room. but as soon as you saw him, your smile disappeared.
there he was, dressed in a hot black t-shirt and jeans, leaning against the stairs with a drink in his hand. and next to him was a girl. her dark black hair fell down her back and contrasted with her fair skin. she had on a red bra-like top and the shortest shorts known to man.
they were laughing. talking. why was she making him laugh so much? her hand was on his bicep and his hand on her waist.
you walked over slowly, mouth still slightly open in shock. when he caught a glimpse of you, his eyes went wide and he excused himself from the girl, coming over to you.
“what are you doing here?” his tone was annoyed, impatient.
“um, what? what am I doing here? first of all, you invited me!”
he rolled his eyes, “I didn’t think you’d actually come. it took a army to get you out of your house the first time.”
you scoffed at his rudeness but kept going, “well second of all, what the fuck are you doing?”
“what do you mean, ‘what am I doing’? i’m at a party, having fun.”
you’re eyes got wide and your voice got louder, almost able to be heard by others over the music, “you’re with someone else! what the fuck?”
he put his hand over your mouth and backed you into a corner where nobody would see you, “shut the fuck up. damn, do you ever stop talking? what? you act like we got married last night.”
your eyes glossed over with hurt as you ripped his hand from your mouth and spoke, “what? so nothing that happened last night means anything to you?”
he laughed and rolled his eyes again, “oh my god! it wasn’t that big of a deal. it was one night. yeah, we had fun. but I thought you knew it was just that: fun. you act like we said ‘I love you’ or some shit.” he took a swig of his beer.
you felt stupid. he was making you feel like last night was all in your head. the tears started to fall on their own and you couldn’t stop staring at him in disbelief.
he sighed, “oh, now you’re fucking crying? grow up, (y/n). we’re in high school. what did you think? we were gonna go run away together, get married, have kids, and live in the florida keys?” he scoffed, “you’re pathetic.”
you wiped your tears quickly and made eye contact again, “no, I didn’t think we were gonna get married”, that was a lie that hurt your heart to say, “but fuck, jake! we had sex on a beach and now you’re here flirting with some other girl like I don’t mean anything to you?”
“it’s just sex! fuck, you are so sappy!”
“you took my virginity, jake! what am I supposed to do? pretend like it never happened because you want to fuck some other girl?” the tears started again, and it was getting harder to hold them back.
he threw his hands up like he was innocent, “hey, don’t blame that shit on me! I didn’t know you were a virgin! you didn’t tell me shit.”
“so it was all about sex?! so if you knew I was a virgin, you would’ve never taken me out?” your shook your head, hoping you were wrong.
“no, I wouldn’t have”, he scoffed and said it like it was obvious, then he turned and ran his hand through his hair muttering, “this is such bullshit.”
you couldn’t help the disgust and shock plastered on your face as you took him in. this was a new person. this wasn’t the man you knew last night. maybe it was because he was drunk, or maybe you were just a fool all along, believing his lies. you dropped your head and took a shuddering breath.
“so, you don’t want me?”
he turned back to you and you looked back up. he sighed at your face, covered in tears, like it was annoying to see you like this, like you were a rock at the bottom of his shoe.
“no, I don’t want you. I wanted you last night, and so I had you. don’t make this a thing, ok? normal girls know that when a guy shows up at their house at night asking to ‘hang out’, it means he wants to hook up.” he took a breath, “I guess you just thought I was asking you out so we could lay in a flower field naming the stars and counting the constellations”, he laughed at you, “don’t get me wrong, the sex was good but that’s all it was. now, we’re done.”
that was it. the truth. the truth you never wanted to know. you didn’t know what else to say to him, but you knew you had to say something.
“ok.”
he raised his eyebrows, “ok? you’re done crying?” he sighed, “alright, i’ll see you around.” he walked away, drinking more of his beer, and returned to the box-dye-black-haired girl.
you moved on autopilot, leading yourself out of the room and back into the kitchen with the loud rap playing. passing by the liquor island, you grabbed a big bottle of malibu and continued outside. the party was still going, people making out and talking everywhere. you found the porch stairs and sat down, opening the rum and chugging a good amount. you sat there, drinking and staring out into the moonlight for a long time. you could still feel his hands on you, and you shivered. it was now such an unhappy memory. when the malibu was about half gone, you pulled out your phone. you went to your camera app and looked at the pictures from last night. they started with the one of jake striking a pose right after he learned you wanted to be a photographer. you laughed at the memory and took another drink of the malibu. you swiped and found a bunch of pictures that you had took while you two were laying on the beach, right after you were done having sex. they started with you two smiling, then another of him kissing your cheek, then another of you kissing passionately.
“you can’t tell me that wasn’t real”, you muttered to yourself, looking at the picture and taking a swig of rum.
“boy problems?”
a girl’s voice startled you as she walked up to you from behind.
“yeah.” it was all you could say, the tears already welling up again. you turned off your phone, not being able to look at the happy faces anymore.
she sighed and sat down next to you, “I know that feeling. happened to me a year ago.”
“really?” you looked over. she was so pretty. her brown skin and hair fit well with her marbled glasses frames. she was dressed in a polka dot t-shirt and jeans with a headband taming her curls.
“yeah, some guy I met from a different school. you don’t even want to know what happened.”
you looked at her empathetically and handed her the bottle.
“thanks”, she took a drink and turned to you, smiling. “i’m kate.”
“(y/n). it’s nice to meet another girl who can relate.”
“oh yeah”, she sighed, “I definitely can. so, who’s the guy?”
you hesitated at first, but then thought: what did you have to lose by telling her?
“a guy named jake.”
she gasped, “wait. kiszka?”
you nodded and took another drink.
“that’s the guy who broke my heart a year ago.”
you nearly spit out your gulp of rum. “what? he dated you?”
she rolled her eyes, “yeah, well I wouldn’t call it dating. it was one night. a glorious night on the beach.”
you went still but stayed silent. of course. of course, it was all a prepared night. it was a routine he did to make girls put out and then leave them high and dry.
“I know that’s what happened to you, too. i’ve heard it’s what he does.” she shrugged and took the drink from you, downing some more. she looked over at you and smiled softly, “i’ll help you get over him; I don’t have many friends anyway. we can go get slurpies and sour candy and go watch step brothers at my house.”
you laughed and nodded, laying your head on her shoulder, “that sounds great.”
a silence fell over you, only the faint sound of music and breathing audible.
“it feels like i’m never gonna be alright.” you were such a fool for him. you let him build you up just to tear you down. you hated how much you still wanted him, after everything.
“yes, you will. believe me, it takes time but you get there eventually. until then you just have to deal with it: being wrapped around his finger.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
THE END.
this one took forever to write (purely because i’m lazy and took so many long breaks lmao) but it’s so rewarding to see it finished! please let me know if you liked this one and what you would like to see next! love you guys so so so much! 💓
(comment under this post to be added to my overall tag list because I just realized I don’t have an overall tag list lol :))
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Thinking about having a shitty past partner who never really did anything for your pleasure and then now being with Jake and him going down on her for the first time and- yeah that’s all. I suppose I’m projecting
Jake is such a pleasure dom I can feel it in my bones. He'd take his sweet, sweet time warming you up, kissing your neck, touching you over your panties, kissing and licking down your chest and belly until he's perfectly situated between your legs. He's very aware you've never had this before and he cannot wait to make a mess of you. Gently taking your panties off after kissing over the soft material, making you squirm for more. You'd be so shy, he'd kiss your knees, helping you part your legs by telling you, "I want to taste you so badly, I'm gonna make you feel so good. But only if you want me to, baby." He purrs. You nod quickly, cheeks blushing. He would kiss your thighs and gently lick slowly between your folds. Immediately sending a wave of pleasure through your body. You can't help but claw at the sheets. His lips making you moan and whimper and arch your back at the overwhelming pleasure. God he's so focused, he wants you to remember this. To know you deserve it. That your pleasure is important to him and he'd give you whatever you wanted if it'd make you happy.
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📸 brittni_howard on ig
they’re TWINS
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readyforthegarden · 2 days
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🥴
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my baby x
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jakekiszkadaily · 2 days
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9.18.24
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writingcold · 1 day
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Chapter Eight - Internal flaws and internal conflicts will lead the way
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Content Warnings:  I need to put this here - this is a work of fiction. There will be imagery of violence, character deaths, inequities, poverty, heavy angst, and adult sexual situations throughout the story. Please read at your own discretion. All characters are fictional, though some of the big events that are shown are historical, but may not be historically accurate. 
Thank you to @edgingthedarkness for all of her help as my all mighty beta for this fiction. She listened to me drone on and on about it for months on end. She really took a bullet for this one! She created the banner for this story as well! Also thank you to @katuschka for her amazing skills in bringing our hero Jakub to life. Divider art by @ firefly-graphics.
The Dead
Jake X Fem!Reader
Chapter Eight word count: approximately 6000 words
Warnings in this part: Sibling arguing, feelings of self doubt, grief.
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Chapter 8.1: Swansong in the Graveyard
     “Spill it,” Owen said as he stared directly into his phone.
      Fighting the urge to laugh, I found distraction in yanking the pan of eggs from the stove before they burned. “Spill what?”
      “Gran says that you’re still in Frankenmuth.”
      I nodded as I plated up my breakfast. “So?”
     “I don’t know when the last time you were in a single place that long just to do research,” he jabbed. “If you wanted a dude in lederhosen, I could’ve flown you here to-”
     I grumbled, bobbling my plate and coffee to the table away from the phone. “It’s just more than I planned on. That’s all.”
     “Still not talking about the story is what is bothering me,” he admitted, turning back to the screen just as I returned to grab my phone from the counter. “Typically you’re done with research and writing by now. How interesting can that touristscape be?”
      I rolled my eyes and moved the topic away from me but it boomeranged back within minutes.
     “What about that literacy bit you have - isn’t that coming up?” 
     Eating slowly, I explained how the conference would traverse across three days and many state-based authors and educators of all levels teaming up for more impactful and meaningful methods of catching the interest of kids and adults …
      “Stop,” he growled as I finally hit the bored button. A twinkle in his eye caught me off guard as he leaned in close. “You gonna take the cute pilot to the conference?”
     I blinked. I blinked again as my brother’s grin grew smug. “Pardon?”
     “The pilot? Maybe he can fly you two out and then-”
     “Owen,” I tried to break in, but he continued to ramble. He spoke unabashedly. “Owen, please.”
     “Come on, Y/n,” he jabbed. “He’s a good looking guy. How could you not-”
     “I’m hanging up.”
     “No! What the hell is going on?”
     “Don’t want to talk about it.”
     He sat back in his chair. When I finally looked at the screen and took in his expression, I knew he got it. Maybe.
     “Since when?”
     “Since when, what?” I dodged.
     “You’re not seeing that guy.”
     “Well, since it wasn’t anything but fun anyway-”
     “Jesus,” he huffed. He did not bother to wait for my response. “When are you gonna give this up and take meeting someone seriously?”
     “Maybe when you-”
     “Dumbest argument ever.” He flipped me off and my jaw dropped. “I at least got married. Divorced, yeah. But I was married and loved it, remember? You won’t even try for fuck’s sake.”
     “I’m just saving a whole lot of trouble for someone.”
     “Bull shit.”
      “You’re not my therapist.”
      “Considering you don’t have a therapist, I kinda am, sis.”
      “Owen, let it drop.”
      His eyes pierced the screen and hit mine and my cheeks colored all the more. It was the same look mom would deal out when we were caught avoiding chores or doing something naughty.
      “I just want you to be happy.”
      “I don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy.”
      “No, but you sure as shit deserve to be happier.” He fell quiet and I picked at a bit of dry skin on my palm. “I know this year is hard. Shit, every year has been hard.”
      I swallowed. He looped us back to a conversation from my prior year’s birthday. I had officially out-lived my mother. To think that by the time she was thirty two, Corrine had lived her whole life. The notion made all the bruises of losing her and Dad all the more fresh. Grief is strange that way. Loss does not get easier as the years pass. It doesn’t heal. No. Those are the kind of wounds that are permanent. They rear up every day and your brain just puts the pain into a box with a lid and a label to remind you. But it never goes away. Owen was the only one who knew who Mom and Dad were for us. Gran might have been her mother, but Corrine was our mom. That kind of permanence doesn’t go away. Not ever.
      Feeling wrung out and done, I told my brother that I loved him and would talk with him in a few days. Upset was not the right word. It was easy to brush others off as just not understanding the situation. With Owen, hiding was not an option. What was an option was to shove the whole conversation to the side and ignore it for a few blissful hours to focus on research. 
     “Fuck,” I sighed as I looked at my scattered pile of notebooks and the singular tab that was open on the laptop. 
     What was there really to research? I had followed the thread of Jake Thomas and of Yakov Petrov to its end. Whoever the hell it actually was in that cemetery was just as elusive as the story itself. Was there a pirate? Yup. Was there a love story right out front and center? Yes. It hurt my head all the more that both were dead and stuck in a cemetery trying to figure out how to ‘move on’ but not leave each other.
      “God, this sucks balls,” I griped.
      How dramatic would it be to torch a manuscript? Would it hurt? Would I laugh maniacally as I dropped it page by page into the open flame? Or perhaps let it spoil in the rain. Ah, even better - cast it to the wind off some mountain would be delightful, I would imagine. The writers of old must have relished in the self murder of their work, unlike what it takes today. Striking a simple delete key does not seem to have the same killing stroke.
     My vibe must’ve been casting a bat signal as a text came through from Vin, scheduling a check in in a few days. I grimaced. I was going to have to get my shit together and make my story the best ever gothic pirate romance. Fuck my life. In truth, I was at a dead end. No pun intended, of course. Guitar Jake or Yakov the Artist. There was no real way to incorporate them in the story either. Maybe they could be side characters? The dynamic could add to a comedic element. Twentieth century hedonist rock star meets nineteenth century hedonist artist from deep in his own family tree…
     “I have officially lost my shit,” I muttered as I made myself move away from my perch at the table.
     Truth be told, if my research was complete, there was no reason to stay in Frankenmuth - was there? The idea seemed wrong. The thought was frayed at the ends like it was trying to stop me from leaving. I melted into the soft cushions of the sofa. Funny idea that was - but why? My fingers found the comfort of the tangled, corded fringe of a pillow as my mind began to drift.
⭒☾   I smoothed the scratchy lace down across the bodice of the dress. The pit of my stomach bristled with opposition. I did not need another party. I did not need to dance and smile and laugh falsely. I did not need to breathe in smoke and the same conversations over yet again. I wanted to lay with my Jakub and feel his warmth around me. I wanted to read to him and him to me and listen to his breathing with the crash on the velvet shore as the sun cast its last rays to the sky. I wanted to feel his strength and bask in the heat of us.
      However, there I was, walking down the grand stairs, eyes cast to me as if I were some entity to be in awe of. Father was clapping his hands and his voice was booming across the house guests in a tone of celebration. The players began to draw their bows across their strings in a lively jig that tugged the gathering to the wide planks of the ballroom. I blew out a breath that was sour as I cast a wary eye at the backs of my guests. I took refuge with my lovely sister-in-law, Celeste, in the sitting room where voices were hushed and tempers were placid. Somehow, she had hidden a tiny book of sonnets in the folds of her skirts. We read together and kept out the voices of those around us. 
      “Have you seen him? Has he been here to call upon you?” she whispered, her voice full of conspiracy wrapped in grace.
      I nodded as I turned the page. “Been here two days and every moment he can, he is here.”
      “I thought I had caught a glimpse of him on the beach when Astrid and I were at the market this morn,” she said. Her smile was dreamy as she leaned into me. “He’s so handsome. If all you say is true, Maéva, he is a good man that you love.”
      The words shivered across my skin and tingled in my breath. Celeste was my only confidant. She was the only one that knew of how my heart fluttered and my smile sparkled any time my Jakub was near. She was the only one I knew would not cast judgment to his station in this world, as she herself was the daughter of a stablemaster. And she was just as giddy as me when it came to my tales of how we would dance in the tide as it tumbled ashore, or the little trinkets that he would bring to me from his ports of call. She would swoon just as much as I would over the pretty little rock or the pressed flower that would remind him of something I wore or made him feel.
     “Dance with me.”
      I looked up to find Matthias hovering above me, his hand, although turned up for me to take, was kept against his hip bone. I did not like his face. There was a darkness about him that he did not shake, nor did he try to truly hide. His status as a future viscount was his bank that he had overdrawn upon to make himself elevated over the rest of us. We all knew why the viscount had brought his family to this place - he was poorer than those that made their way on the beaches and on the ships of the harbor. He only presented lavishness and superiority due to the blood in his veins. Looking into his dead eyes and his flat mouth, I made my apologies that I was not well enough to dance. Celeste slid her fingers through mine to hold me close.
      “I am sorry, sir,” she said as if her tone was filled with silk. “But our Maéva feels a fever coming upon her-”
      He reached for our joined hands and separated us. “She looks plenty strong enough.”
      I searched for my father, but he was too busy clapping Matthias on with encouragement that I knew any argument would be for not. The anger toiled under my breath as I voided my expression. One dance. And then I could build upon Celeste’s fever fib. My eyes stared forward while my feet and frame moved in time with the players. I imagined my Jakub, dressed in the fine fabrics that Matthias wore, showing off the strong body and grace he had been blessed with. I saw him with his hair drawn back and his hands polished. But that was not him. No. My Jakub was wind blown and wild and hardened by work. His mind was open and his words were shaped by his experiences. That was the man I loved. Threadbare and hungry.
      Father and the viscount were close, talking with wide smiles. Their words were fast and glib looking. Father’s excitement was palpable. His hands were like two excited birds flitting around him. I gave the man I danced with no satisfaction of words. But then he gave me only silence anyway. It was as if he and I were in unvoiced agreement to pacify the patriarchs that were obviously so much more aflutter over our nearness. Soured thoughts were bending the joyful notes that filled my ears. Each face that I looked upon held anticipation and cheer. Anxiety stabbed at my feet. My limbs turned heavy as I turned away from him to give me some distance from his nearness. Celeste hurried towards me, her pretty face stretched with concern.
      “Come. The air grows too close for us here,” she was saying as Matthias reached to catch my shoulder.
      “They expect us to dance, madam,” he said, voice icy and hand heavy on my skin.
      “They can be disappointed then,” she remarked.
       My feet fumbled forward. I was thankful for the full skirt to hide such ungainly steps. My breath felt hot in my mouth and my stomach lurched. Everything felt woozy as Celeste maneuvered us through the tangle of guests. I wanted my rooms, but instead, she drew me to the parlor where she could shut away the eyes and wagging tongues but get me to sit.  
      “You do have a fever,” she said as she cast the window open.
      “No,” I said, wiping at my mouth. “I was just faint. Perhaps his sickish perfume was too close to my nose.”
      “He really is a brute. I heard Abel saying some rather unkind statements about that one.” She was pouring a few drops of wine into a tiny glass as I tried to compose myself. “We can hide here for a while. I’m sure Papa will be on the hunt for us, but I say let him hunt. I do not trust him when he is with the viscount. He changes when that man is near.”
      She was correct. Father changed in the face of bred privilege. My soul quivered across the notion. My father’s intentions were becoming very clear. It sickened me. I wondered if they were in negotiations for my hand already, or perhaps still in the discovery phase like two dogs, sniffing at each other to see if the carcass of the other was willing to submit. Tears prickled at my eyes at the thought. I had no control over this and it was as if I was a prized bitch looking to be sold. Celeste took to my side, but I could not be consoled. I wanted my Jakub. Such a simple dream to love him and be with him… ☾
      My lungs burned like I had been under water too long. I sputtered and coughed through emotions as I pushed away from the couch. I was crying. My cheeks felt hot and sticky and wet with strangled cries that I had just been having in my dream-state. I was quick to the kitchen to fetch a glass of water to cool the effects. The dreams were getting harder to take. I had tried to write them down as is, but they were like smoke through my brain, too thin and elusive to really record. Although, I was discovering that elements of these pieces were landing more often into the story. Spooky. It was the sense of my brain leaking out uncontrollably onto the proverbial page that bothered me more than the gothic pirate love story as a whole.
     I needed out of the rental for a bit. It was too late for lunch, but early supper wasn’t a horrible thing. Deciding on the diner, I packed up my bag and thought perhaps I could tuck into a corner and proof the last few pages over coffee and sandwich without having to hog a booth or table during a rush. I was correct that it was not busy, but there was a rather large, loud group that had pushed six tables together in the middle to accommodate their numbers. By the look of it, it was a men’s group that was meeting for their afternoon dose of gossip.
      I slid into the booth that the server had waved me to. My eyes rolled closed over the first sip of steaming coffee. God that was good. I tucked behind the laptop, fighting to keep my expression blank as I read over the squishy words that I was daring to call worthy of a story. I sat back as the server returned to take my order. As I handed her the menu, I noticed a set of eyes I had seen before - faded blue jean colored and a very sun weathered smile met my gaze. I grinned at the kind man from the park who had been working.
     Dinner finished, and some hot gossip taken in with hearty laughter, I decided to walk through the park by the library, and perhaps step foot inside as it had been a few days since I had looked across the books and care that Becca and the others had helped me through. Stopping at the florist, I purchased a few large plants to take along in thanks. It would be my first step in severing the connection here. I owed them so much, even if it did not amount to what I would really be using in the story. 
      “I come bearing gifts,” I announced as I struggled through the door.
     Becca was quick to help. “Oh, these are lovely.”
     “I thought a little more green in here would keep you bright,” I said, smiling across the wide range of plants and live displays that would carry the library through the winter.
     I helped her put them close to the windows by my workstation. I grinned as I looked at her. “I’m afraid I’m nearing the end of my stay,” I admitted, my fingers drifting across the huge binding of the newspapers.
     She smiled. “You’ve found what you’ve come for.”
     I nodded, though reluctance swam across my heart. “I believe that I have. You have been so good to me here.”
     Emotional outburst aside, it was going better than I planned. We chatted a bit before I set into the books that had become the path of my story that made my fingers itch, despite not really liking the plot. Perhaps I will settle into it at some point. 
      “Oh my goodness,” Becca exclaimed from behind the glass of the back office. 
      I was not the only one to sit up, prairie dog style looking for the source of upset. She was making her way towards me with a look that might have been inspiration. I glanced around to find that other patrons were just as puzzled as I was.
      “I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before, Y/n,” she proclaimed as she had eyes cast down on her phone, scrolling. “What was I thinking? Or… well. Not thinking is more like it.”
      “Uh, wanna catch me up here, Becca? I’m not from here, remember,” I laughed at her flustered state, sure she was thinking full sentences, but what was coming out made no sense.
      She grinned as she waved at me. Her exuberance washed over me and it was hard not to get caught up in it, even though I had no idea what was going on. “I have someone I need you to meet.”
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Chapter 8.2: Swansong in the Graveyard
     “We need to run.”
     The words blazed in my thoughts as I watched the creature rise from my grave once more. I had come to the decision that this feminine form could not be Maéva. If the memories that had been shown to me thus far were true, then this thing could not be her. If this thing were my soulmate, there would be no hesitation within and know me for what I am - hers. And the truth would be the same for me, but all I could feel towards it was… curiosity. Perhaps anger. Jealousy, even. How such a creature could be doomed to repeat or seem to repeat the same construct of a path over and over without meaning…  Wait. What am I if that road of thought were true?  What am I in this half existence but the same as the creature - am I nothing more than goo from the ether that has been chained to a strip of ground because of some man’s greed and foul nature? For lack of a better phrase, I closed my being off from the lights of the world as the creature slipped away once more. Could something such as myself be petulant? The stray thought struck as the gate whined to its closed position.
     “We need to leave.”
     Her hands were shaking against my chest. Whatever had happened had just occurred. She had run to me still dressed in her fine cream and olive green gown. The lace puckered and draped across her breasts and dripped from her shoulders. I could not stop myself from dragging my fingers across her collarbones and up along her graceful neck. I tried to soothe her with my words and touch and kisses, but she whipped herself away from me.
     “Jakub!” she cried, her delicate fingers tucking into tight fists.
     “Just tell me then what has happened,” I said, unable to keep the edge of impatience from my tone.
     She withdrew a few steps. Her features slacked with an expression that made me quiet. “I am to marry.”
     The bottom of my very shallow world fell away. I could not understand her words that she continued to speak. Every bit of me was frozen on the notion that she was meant for another.
     “Jakub,” she whispered.
      I kissed her. It was all I could do. Our dream was to be severed. I pressed my fingertips into the plump of her blurred out cheek and the hardness of her back as if I could force her to be part of me through this mourning. She reeled back from me with a frustrated cry.
      My thoughts thinned and I found myself kneeling, hands dug into the darkness of the dirt. I begged the cosmos to allow me to see her - to see my Maéva. To know her features, her expressions, her… her soul and how it resided in her eyes. I could feel her innocence. I could feel her goodness. It danced across my fabric. But to just glimpse her eyes and know her. My chin tipped and I looked into the velvet of the night sky and the swirl of songs and begged for that scrap of memory.
      “No- no, Jakub,” she stammered. “We can leave this place - together. We can go to the east! We can build our lives there!”
     “Maéva, you don’t know what it’s like-”
     The sound she made hit me. I had insulted her.
     “I don’t know what? How to live without my family? Or do you mean to say I do not know how to live without my family’s wealth?”
     I felt a sigh bubble through my chest. “You don’t know what it truly means to be cold or hungry. Despair is not what I ever want for you.”
     “If it means we are together, I would gladly show you what strength lies in these bones of mine.” 
     She was so resolute. So sure of herself. It was the trappings of her always having what she needed that gave her that kind of confidence. I felt small for these thoughts. She possessed such knowledge, such a drive to learn - but this. What she was asking would take away the shelter that allowed her to thrive in that world.
     “Jakub - you could learn to farm, or build ships or apprentice in some other trade,” she was explaining. “And I could teach!”
     “Teach?”
     “I taught you. Surely there is no other more stubborn student!” Her laugh was pulling at my resolve. “Or I can learn to be a clerk, or even farm at your side if you are willing to have me.”
     She was reaching for me once more and I could not keep my hands from passing across the fine fabric that held a menagerie of flowers and moths and swirls of colors that I could’ve studied for days to pick out all of the finer details. She knew there was nothing I would not do for her. But this - to just run. To leave them all behind and live in this world together - as equals.
      “My mother,” I whispered into her hair.
     “Of course we will bring her,” she said without hesitation.
     Her exuberance was hard not to purchase in to.
     “You have been to Boston and New York. We can make our life there. We could be free there,” she continued on.
     I paused, knowing that no ship would be leaving any time soon. “When does your father expect this wedding?”
     “June.”
     The lake ice would have the harbor locked up for a few more weeks. If LaBeau was willing to wait to give his daughter away, that gave us the opportunity to book passage. My purse was too light to do this - to make our escape. I was already a beggar. How was I to do this without coin, without…
      She kissed me and led my hands against her fine dress. She was shivering with cold. I folded her close knowing that I needed to return her to the cage of her rooms - at least for now. I wrapped my coat around her, the bite of cold nipped at me but she allowed me to hold her close as we began to walk. Maéva was like a bird, chirping out plans and flittering with excitement. 
     The doubt attacked in the silence of my brain once it was alone. How could I care for her? Surely she would come to regret stepping so willingly into the depths of poverty and find her love turning to resentment when the realization came that her belly was empty and her body exposed to the true harshness of this world. To know that she would willingly walk into the sheer unknown only because she loved me, set my brain on needles with thoughts of unsureness. She trusted that I would provide what I could and in trade she would care for me. Though these lands of the new world were framed as obtainable dreams, that was still only true for those of wealth. Maéva would grow tired of the scrabble to just survive on the daily means of hard labor. Perhaps I should walk away and let her to her path of husband and titles and …
      My gaze turned to the way the tops of the trees bent under the angry gust of wind. It matched my own thoughts. I had entertained leaving her behind? I wanted to leave her to a fate chosen by her father? If an entity such as myself could feel shame, I am sure I was feeling it the only way I knew how. The waves of color that thundered around me, billowing into storm clouds, were gathering to punish me. Fun was on them - apparently all of this was punishment across all time.
     I had watched the ice slowly crush against the shore. Maéva fought with me to take her purse and purchase three tickets on the first ship that could carry us east. It was going to be hard enough to try to get her aboard without recognition, but to be forced to use her own money - it was not the start to our lives that I wanted and it bruised my ego in a way that was difficult to swallow. After years of watching my mother struggle to keep us alive, then adding my hands to the work, it was beyond hard to take her money, no matter the cause. I had fought my way through this life. I would fight my way to get away with her, even if it meant I had to take her as a married woman - take her from that rogue of a man her father deemed better.
     It was bitter. My need to stand in our way because of some perceived notion that I had to be a man for her was dragging upon us, threatening the tender thread of a chance that waited for us. What a fool I was.
     Another grand ball celebrating the engagement roused me from my sulking, for that was what I really was doing - acting like a child who had been scolded and paddled. I snuck up onto the side patio, staying to the shadows with my eyes searching for Maéva. There were musicians playing and people moving around with huge smiles that oozed privilege. I saw LaBeau waving his arms around and acting like he was the rooster on the field while his daughter stood at another man’s side. I hated it - the sight of that man, that Matthias, being so close to her made a rage boil in my belly that I could not tolerate. 
     Their hands met and he guided her through a dance that made the guests of the party clap their hands and smile their most beautiful smiles. No smile was upon Maéva’s mouth, however. Quite the opposite. What more, Matthias mirrored her hard expression. I watched as she turned, full of grace, full of beauty while her father beamed in his greed and lust for title for the family. And the man who was equally bright - that must have been the viscount. He was practically leering over the merchant’s purse that swung so heavy at his side and dripped from the walls of his marvelous manor house. They were the mechanism that drove this union, surely.
     I caught Maéva’s eye, but withdrew deeper into the shadows. Amongst the smiles and delicate music, I solidified my presence as an outlier. I would free her from this fate that her father wanted more for himself than for her. To know that he would damn her for a few scraps of veneration was sickening. Was his wealth not enough, must he really have a title to put before his name as well? 
     Pathetic.
     The veil of clouds streaked across the velvet of night, curling and swirling through the air like the smoke from Monsieur LaBeau’s fine pipe. I could feel the anger I had felt across the expanse of time. If that was a lesson that I needed to learn from, then in my stubbornness, I never learned to let that malice subside. I could feel it still bubble and toil on my echoed thoughts.
     I stole away from the manor house like a stray cat turned away from its supper. I lingered on the edges of the beach, not wanting to be seen by anyone for fear of seeing the toil of my struggle over her. I had sequestered her coins under the floor of my bed. I would collect those coins and find a ship to the east coast. It would be easier to hide in a city. Perhaps we could get to Savannah. I had listened to a fellow deck hand ramble for hours about the warmth and wild beauty of the near tropical port. Or maybe Philadelphia. There were many, many people there making hiding amongst them easier.
     I knew she would be in the market the following day with her matron. We’d found it easy enough for me to shadow her for a chance to talk. It was always near the baker when Leila would have her attention pulled enough away from her charge that we could sneak away for long enough for the woman to take no notice. The morning found me lingering amongst the fringes of the market square, my stomach empty. Mother had used the last few coins for medicine for the woman next door. The babe had been sick for days. Mother had been trying to apply the typical remedies, but the fever was slow to break and it was obvious that the child's needs were beyond her hands. She bartered where she could, but when there was nothing left to barter with, she would turn to what her body may earn. I would be sure to beg the stable master and the blacksmith for work, even if it meant for a few scraps to get us through a few days.
      And there it was once more. I hid this from Maéva. This aspect of struggle. I wondered if I did it to protect her or keep her blind? It did not matter. She would hear me once more lay out what was ahead, but I knew in my heart that she would not listen. She would have to learn hunger and need through experience and I would have to keep my tongue about me as she waded through the mire in hopes that she would not wake and realize the horrible mistake that she was making on loving me.
     Close to midday, I was near giving up that she would arrive, and getting more frustrated as I knew I should be finding work for my hands, not standing idle. Finally, she appeared, fresh and bright amongst the damp and dingy pier. I fought my heart from just running to her. How foolish would that be. No. I waited and quietly watched as she looked over the wares she was there to procure for another day in the grand house. Her matron was already looking thin of patience. I wonder if Maéva had deliberately worn her through before even reaching the market for the sole purpose of this visit. I bided my time, moving slowly and making sure to look at the different vendors before stopping once more before the baker’s stall. My stomach stabbed and complained. I was fighting the urge to snatch a lump of bread that had been cut apart and tossed to the side as stale as it was easier to feed it to the birds than a human in need. I dug my fist deeper into my torn pocket in hopes that it would keep me from the easy notion of theft. She approached, relieving my thoughts of my hollow belly.
      “Good day,” she whispered, hiding her mouth in her outstretched arm.
      I smiled and nodded as I looked for the matron. “Talk?”
     I moved away as was our warrant in such affairs. I would find her once more closer to the beach once she was able to slip the eye of Leila. There was a spot under the well trod boards of the pier that was in between the massive pylons where the boulders sheltered the land. I waited, breathing in the soured, fish riddled air. Maéva appeared in all of her faceless brightness, but I could feel her smile radiating off all of her body. It was always the same without fail whenever she came near. I could only imagine what I actually looked like, but on the inside - I swooned over her nearness.
     She took my hand and I leaned in to kiss her mouth, but I stopped before the sweet crush touched my lips. “Will you want to go to Savannah?” I whispered.
     Half of a breath later, her arms were thrown around my neck and her lips to mine with a trill of laughter. I found myself caught up in her exuberance. My love for her was absolutely consuming and yet so strong that I felt as if I could sustain on our love alone.
     Coyotes chirping in the distance drew my eye back to the present. The creature was once again laying upon my grave. It was torture not knowing the significance of this being. Or perhaps it was the anguish of knowing this lingering was my form of purgatory. I was languishing across centuries of time that I should have been with her - with my Maéva. 
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Yeah. So where do we go from here? 💚
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seenoversundown · 2 days
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🖤 moodboard for chapter 18🖤
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Just to give some visuals for the chapter if you have or haven’t read! 🤭🖤
If you need to read: Chapter 18
I hope you’re ready for tomorrow, I know I am 😉
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