#i hate tags sfm

[eagle-head-charge]

WE!!!!!!! ARE GOING TO MAKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE PRETTIEST TREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AMERICA HAS EVER SEEENNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAAGAGAGAGAGAHHGAGAHGAHHHHH

[Part 2] (this time with more Gay!)

[hballegro]

guess what no one asked for

my sfms. here they are

you think i just make ellis and nick l4d2 content WRONG

i also make men kissing in tf2

i also made a few ANIMATIONS but those are NOT for viewing because most of them are GIFTS to LOVED ONES except THIS ONE

its not very GOOD but i DID finish it unlike MOST of my ANIMATIONS

that is ALL i will now go back MASH content. i just wanted to give context for my current banner that i made for pride month. i am proud of at least 3 of those.

[djannell]

[raeman-ray]

saw this and couldnt help myself

[artscheese]

If I ever see skinny habit drawing again ill blow up your pancakes with my mind.

okay

[mechanichuntsman]

[skeletalheartattack]

u rb’d and tagged my art as nice lines and I wanted to thank u bc that’s probably the thing I’m most self conscious about when it comes to my art and it gave me a big ol confidence boost 🫶🏻 have a nice day/night :)

hey hell yeah!!!! that's what it's all about babey!!!! that's what it's all about!!!!!!

[sillyscientists]

Call me controversial but the more I think about Emesis Blue on my own the less and less I like it. More for personal reasons, mostly Horror tropes I’m not too fond of. I should really re-watch it, take notes on what I like and dislike and write a whole critique on it, because there’s a lot of things it does great and a lot of things that just bother me.

[heavymedicshackerwife]

Under the cut for length but... Some musings on how the fandom treats Heavy. TW for fatphobia and discussion of life under the Soviet Union.

(BTW this is the stuff I posted on Discord a while ago. Somewhat ranty but... I just love that dude. I do complain about an artist in this fandom, but PLEASE do not harass them. I do not name them, this is my silly personal opinion.)

I hate how the fandom treats Heavy... He's got such deep lore but all the fans are like "SO FUNNI! STUPID FAT POOTIS COMMIE HUEHUE!"He's none of those things but they've turned him into the butt of the joke. He's a hardcore badass who gets so little appreciation at all. He has a PHD but he's constantly depicted as a dumbarse.

Heavy isn't a communist at all, and his father was killed by the regime. Sorry if I piss off any whiny tankies who get mad at me for dissing a nuclear military superpower that killed millions of people, but the Soviet Union was a brutal dictatorship and generally not a good place to live (shocking! I know!) . Heavy was sent to a GULAG. A work camp. He risked his life to break his family out and free the prisoners, but does anybody care? Nope! Let's make soviet themed cosmetic #283027192 because original funni joke!

The entire fandom on Tumblr seems to ignore Heavy too. He only really shows up in Tumblr tags as "Medic's boyfriend" and they're happy to give him depth... As long as he's just Medic's golden retriever BF. I see so much fanart where he's this big aggressive alpha-daddy but that's not him around Medic either. Heavy is fierce and will gladly tear someone's arms off, but he's not just a brute. He's an intellectual. He really does care for the people he loves. And for the rest of the fandom, he's the butt of a joke. Big, fat, stoopid pootis man.

Valve gave us this incredibly intelligent, deep, creative character and despite all the fat jokes in-game (then again all the Mercs talk shit about each other) he has so much character development that just gets overlooked unless he's either kissing someone else or getting memed. I'm used to SFMs and memes having him as "dumbass fatty" because half of them were made by teenage boys before the comics were made (and they probably didn't know about the Russian translation where Heavy talks like an academic at times), but having Nice Tolerant Tumblr treat him as just "someone's boyfriend" is just as insulting.

There's this one AU by this artist I blocked where he's literally a Mafia boss Alpha Daddy with a cigar, and Medic as his twink femboy boyfriend. That's not him. You're sticking two middle aged men onto the 🥺🗿generic yaoi template. He's not a soft ball of butter but he's not the cruel, brutal classic Heavy either. He really is like a bear like his description says, as people either see him as a funny toy or a big aggressive beast. He loves his family and does this job FOR them, but he's also strong and fierce.

I could go deeper. I could talk about fandom fatphobia and how the only way he's consistently sexualised is as a huge angry muscular dominant, rather than general sex appeal like the other mercs. Lots of NSFW fanart ignores his belly, and just makes him beefy. There are few fics he has (Him and Demo have so few good fics on AO3). He's left out of "Mercenary boyfriend" scenarios on Wattpad. Sure, a 57 year old, 300lb balding Siberian mercenary who's in love with his gun isn't to everyone's taste, but none of the Mercs are conventionally "handsome". I couldn't see any of them modelling underwear for Calvin Klein. I love Medic, I love the ship between him and Medic, but I hate how the fandom treats Heavy as just an extension of him.

He wrestled a bear bare-handed. Sure, he's big. He's overweight. But I'd bet he's in better health and fitness than any of us here. Some people in this fandom literally cannot turn their brains on and actually think of why Heavy night look how he does (appearance and fatness is not a moral failure btw), they just think he's uggo and thus just a joke.

Thing is... He's not even "just" fat! He's overweight and plus-sized, but look at what he does all day. He runs around with a 150kg minigun and several rounds of ammo, alongside a bulletproof vest and TINY legs. He has a strongman's body type which is mostly thick muscle with a layer of fat. He's big, and he certainly has body fat, but he's arguably in great shape for someone over 50 who's most likely lived through several famines. Heavy being fat does not mean he is unhealthy in these circumstances.

He is arguably the best husband out of all the Mercs. Not a pyromaniac or a drunk, not immature, doesn't like his job TOO much, doesn't have lead poisoning or a god complex, doesn't love building killing machines and won't cheat on you with Scout's mama.

Oh mann... I love him. He needs so much more love. And I wish the fandom would love him too

[casadecopia]

Based on this art by @grindedcoffeebeans

V buys Copia a pet rat 🐀 and Copia loves the rat sfm. He’s so angry and confused— irritated at V for somehow knowing just how to exactly get under his skin. He feels vulnerable knowing V somehow seems to understand him better than does himself.

a/n: I've literally only watched the last two eps and Rite Here Right Now so if my b if I got the characters personalities wrong

He didn’t want to like the rat, he tried to hate the rat— but it was impossible.

One morning Copia had gone into his makeshift office and found a bright sparkling purple gift wrapped box with curls of silver ribbon sitting in the middle of his desk.

Copia had looked down at it distastefully and scoffed. He had half the mind to knock it to the floor and had almost swiped it off his desk—Only to stop at the last moment with a frown as he saw the top of the box was covered in holes.

There was a sudden scratching noise from inside the box, followed by a barely audible patter of tiny padded feet—

Copia felt a tug on his heartstrings, and he took a step back, eyes widening as they caught sight of a pink nose— smaller than the end of a pencil eraser— poking out of a hole near the bottom of the box.

He reached out with his hand and felt the tiny brush of whiskers against the pad of his finger. The nose pushed its way farther out and sniffed— it was the softest of sounds followed by the smallest puff of warm air, and Copia’s breath caught in his throat.

He swallowed and then snatched the top off the box in one quick movement to reveal a small sleek gray rat with a long tail.

It turned its head. It had two beady eyes—one dark, the other so pale it almost appeared white. It rose to its feet and wrapped it’s tiny paw around the rim of another hole and blinked up at him from the confines of the box.

Copia didn’t hesitate and immediately reached down to scoop up the rat.

It fit perfectly in the palm of his hand. It turned around in a circle, sat down, wrapper its tail around its body and then closed its eyes.

Copia gently sat down on the garish golden sofa behind the desk. He rearranged one of the pillows and set the sleeping rat down carefully.

He was still staring thoughtfully at the rat when one of his assistants or ‘assisatans’— as he liked think of them— approached with a tray of coffee, tea, and an assortment of small biscuits and tea cakes.

Copia frowned at his assisatan. “I thought I told you to take off your name tag and cover the naked shame of your face,” he grumbled up at them and then turned his head in to look away.

“Frater Imperator,” they began.

Copia raised his hand at them to stop. “I do not care about what bullshit you have to say. You are supposed to be nameless! Out, I want you out of my sight!”

The assisatan turned around and began to quickly walk back towards the door.

Copia coughed loudly and they stopped. “You may leave the tray,” he told them and picked up the purple box from the desk.

He had been about to set it on the floor when he caught sight of a dark purple velvet covered pouf with silver trim and tassels.

“Ah, sir that is from—“

“I don’t need to be told who it’s from!” Copia snapped at them harshly and pointed at his desk.

The assisatan set down the tray as Copia gently set the pouf down by his side and turned his attention back to the box.

A lilac soft cashmere blanket, the size of a washcloth lay at the bottom along with bits of sawdust, a small piece of stale bread, and a salt lick the size of a small dice.

Copia frowned at the water dispenser stuck to the side of the box and pursed his lips in annoyance. “What shit is this? This— this—is a disgrace.”

He looked down at the rat at his side. “Like for some common hamster?” He complained with a shake of his head.

“I’d like another cup and saucer.” He told them and then added “Also some shredded napkin. And don’t look at me that way,” Copia grunted, and then flicked his hand at them to go away.

“You come back I better not recognize your gender nor see your face— I give you masks much better than Ghouls,” Copia muttered in irritation.

He turned his attention to his rat and gently laid the blanket on top of it. He tucked it gently around the rat’s sides and tried not to scoff too loudly at the fancy embroidered V on the back of the blanket.

“Mother fucking show off,” he murmured under his breath at the thought of his twin.

Copia sighed and pushed the thought from his mind as he took a biscuit with a raspberry pentagram baked into it and poured himself some tea.

The teacup slowly began to change from a clean bright white and then marble into a deep blood red as the hot water warmed the porcelain.

Taking a bite out of the biscuit, Copia turned and looked down at the small snoozing lump beside him.

He set the biscuit down and contemplated the tray for a moment.

The coffee cake looked especially tempting today. It was warm, soft and fluffy on the inside and decorated with little round balls of cinnamon and a dusting of powdered sugar.

Copia took a bite and then set the cake down on a small china plate decorated with delicate black grucifixes. He gently placed it beside his rat on the pillow beside him, and then pinched off a small piece and crumbled it onto the saucer.

The rat’s nose twitched and it opened its eyes. It stared at the cake on the plate beside it.

Copia pushed a crumb towards it, watched as it hesitated before crawling carefully over to the saucer to inspect the cake.

He booted up his computer as he watched the rat begin to nibble on a fluffy bit of cake.

Copia hummed in the back of his throat in contentment and opened his web browser. He looked down at the rat one more time and then reached for his cup of tea.

The computer pinged softly, and a message appeared in the bottom corner of the screen. It read ‘(3) UNREAD MESSAGES FROM V,’ and then blinked and updated to say ‘(4) UNREAD MESSAGES FROM V.’

Copia closed the box at the bottom of the screen and began to type ‘demonbabynames.com’ into the search bar.

The computer pinged again, and he smirked as the number of unread messages switched to (5) and then (6).

Copia ignored the box and then clicked the first link for the letter ‘A.’ He was considering the named ‘Abaddon’ versus ‘Absalom’ when his phone chimed.

‘(1) UNREAD MESSAGE FROM: V’.

With a grunt of irritation, Copia flipped over his phone. Fucking menace, he thought to himself with a roll of his eyes.

He turned back to the screen and scrolled down. "Agamemnon... Asmodeus, Baalzebub, Baal, Belial... What kind of crap website is this? What about Acharon, Andras, Andrealphus, Astaroth, Azazel? Just skip right to Valac, Wormwood and Zepar---? I could do this shit in my sleep.

"Where's my Ars Goatia," he grumbled and began to look through the stack of grimoires at his feet.

There was The Key of Solomon, but he didn't want that. The Apocrypha of Paul, The Holy Books of Thelema, The Cipher Manuscripts...

"Ahh, The Book of Enoch,” he said to himself and picked up the small volume and then groaned as his back started to twinge.

"This will have to do, eh?” Copia said and looked back down at the rat.

It had crawled into his lap to eat the crumbs that had fallen from a chocolate piece of biscotti he was now eating.

"Big appetite..." He murmured fondly to it. "Hungry hmm?"

Copia scowled as his phone went off again. "This guy is like a fucking vampire, yeah? Fuckin' draining the life out of me..."

He picked up his phone.

‘(2) UNREAD MESSAGES FROM: V’.

"What are you, desperate?" Copia snapped as he unlocked his phone.

V: Ivy, hope this 'filthy' rodent harkens 'the darkness at the heart of ur love'

V: XD :D

Eye's widening, Copia texted back in a panic without thinking:

IV: 'I have to push back plans to 2029' --and then hit send.

He was about to help himself to a slice of dark chocolate pound cake when his phone went off again.

Copia frowned and reluctantly set the piece of cake down. He looked at his phone and then snatched a black and white macaroon off the tea tray.

He shoved the entire pasty into his mouth, began to chew furiously and then picked up his phone.

V: FYI Wherever u may hide away i'm gonna hunt u down'

Copia mouthed the words as he read them, eyes widening in a mix of shock, horror-and something else that was definitely not a bit like excitement ran through him. 'Anxiety,' he thought to himself with a shake of his head.

The text message showed a speech bubble that indicated V was still texting.

V: unless u rather choose to walk away from me bc I will tickle u internally

V: U wouldn't have a prob w that would u?

Copia swallowed dryly and began to cough. He almost dropped his phone and took a gulp of tea that immediately dissolved the macaroon and burnt the back of his throat at the same time.

What. The. Fuck.

He picked up a chocolate scone and began to chew it furiously. He swallowed, took another bite, and then reached for a lemon poppy seed square of cake.

Copia followed that up with another cup of tea. He was finishing a half slice of glazed donut when his phone began to ring, shocking him out of his emotional eating spiral.

He was going to get early onset diabetes, he thought, and then sent the call to voicemail.

Copia set down his phone, only for it to immediately chime with another text alert.

'V: u show me urs I'll show u mine' flashed across the screen.

Copia did drop his phone that time and made a strangled noise in the back of his throat as he felt himself flush.

Fucking V.

He carefully picked up his rat and placed it gently back into the box and then stood up.

He grabbed his phone and went to the bathroom, and then marched out a few minutes later with a smile.

Copia turned his phone on mute and then sat happily back down on the sofa and picked up the purple box. He placed it on its side, so the rat could crawl out.

He poured himself some more tea and laughed to himself as his phone vibrated once, twice, and then began to steadily buzz as V apparently decided to switch to call instead of texting.

---

“Fucking-God dammit!” V yelled in frustration and then threw his phone at the nearest ghoul.

“What'd he say?” Rain asked as he took in the red, pinched look on V's face.

He stuck a foot out to stop the phone from sliding across the floor, bent down and then picked it up.

"He didn't say anything important!" V told him quickly with a shake of his head and then stood up, instantly regretting tossing the phone.

Rain raised a brow and turned over the phone and immediately burst into laughter.

"Stop that!" V snapped at him.

Rain shook his head with a snort, looked over at Air and just pointed to the phone in disbelief.

"He send a picture?" Air asked.

Rain nodded and then smirked.

V ran over and snatched the phone out of his hand. "Give that back!"

"And what did Papi Imperater say?" Air asked in a mocking tone, smile widening at the look of indignation on V's face.

"Shut up!" V shouted, face turning red under the paint. He hurled the microphone at the two of them and then quickly took off backstage in embarrassment.

"He said fuckin' 'Kiss my Go-Goat,'" Rain told them with a roar of laughter.

"Classic Copia," Air replied with a chuckle and then smiled.

[eagle-head-charge]

How could anything have been wrong when he had Spy to take care of him?

(Reposting art from the roleplay thread I did with @/backstabbing-spook! Wanted to post it separately so I can tag it with Freedom Fries)

(Yes Solly is in the bath. No I didn't intend for him to be wearing a vest while in the bath. I couldn't find a shirtless model and I don't think it matters too much, nor did I need "shirtless mercs" filling my search history /lighthearted)

(Definitely stuff I hate about it, especially Soldier's right arm/hand. It's positioned so weirdly but I genuinely spent over an hour just fiddling with it and couldn't get it to look right. I ended up keeping my friend waiting for over THREE DAYS while I made SFM sillies. Oops!)

[de-gekkedoktor]

goedemorgen, goedenavond, en goedenacht!

welcome to my Medic kin blog! it's not the fanciest (since i know jack shit about blog decorating) but it's mine! this is technically a sideblog of a sideblog, because i used to do all my medic-posting on @/absinthe-earth-ghoul. turns out my next biggest kin after being an Earth Ghoul is BLU Medic. who knew?

anyway, "about me" time

ik ben Fritz! my name is Fritz!

he/it pronouns for me, please

gay. gay as hell

i'm a college student, so i tend to be rather busy

punk who's trying to be an activist, but i get overwhelmed easily

self ship with my dear Maynard (Engie)

big, weird, multi-source f/o family :]

i'm the BLU Team Medic!

my TF2 canon seems to take some cues from Emesis Blue and TF_Truce, mainly in the names

Christian Brutal Sniper, Ass Pancakes, Painis Cupcake, and the rest of the Freak Fortress guys exist in my canon. i remember quite liking Pancakes (i refuse to call him Ass)

i tend to talk about my teammates using their given names (i'll put them under the cut so nobody gets confused)

i use parenthesis A LOT

i adore using sfm!!! most of the sfm things you'll see are mine!

i love food and cooking so so so much

the reason i use Dutch on here is because i'm slowly learning the language, and it's as close to German as i'm gonna get ToT

my main acc is @/radio-ghost-cooks

uhh. there's probably more that i can't think of right now

a few blinkies, f/o list and family tree, + my tag system and the team's names under the cut :]

decor

tag system

#fritzposting - kind of my signature!

#sfm sillies - my sfm stuff

#dit kan verkeerd zijn - dutchposting

#operating theatre music - playlists/songs i like

#let food be thy medicine - food stuff :]

#mijn leifste - selfship (MAYNARD!!!! <33333)

#mamushi🐍 - Venom Snake and Kaz (familial f/os)

#philanthropy🧨 - David and Hal (platonic/familial f/os)

#bird on an antler🎐 - Lysandre and Sycamore (familial f/os)

#firebug🔥 - Pyro (familial f/o)

my teammates' names!

Scout - Jakob/Jake

Sniper - Mundy

Soldier - Solly (RED's Soldier was Jane)

Spy - N/A (i know what it is i just know he wouldn't want me to tall anyone)

Pyro - Pyro!

Demoman - Mickey

Engineer - Maynard <3333

Heavy - Ivan

not my teammates!

Christian Brutal Sniper - Chris

Ass Pancakes - Pancakes

Christian Pure Spy - Mardochee/Mardo/Mallard

Gentlespy - Hugh

Painis Cupcake - Pinny

Vagineer - fucking cunt who i hate

my f/os

Lysandre and Sycamore (Pokemon XY) - my fathers!!

Maynard (TF2) - hubsband

Pyro (TF2) - adoptive son

Dave and Hal (Metal Gear) - adoptive brother and brother-in-law. kinda. Dave and i just have that kinda thing where you know each other so well that you're just brothers to everyone around you

Venom and Kaz (Metal Gear) - technically adoptive parents? but not really? idk Venom taught me what little battle medic technique i have and he adopted Dave in this canon soooooo...

credit to @/sister-lucifer for the dividers

[cluing4looks]

Music Tag

When you see this, post 5 songs you actually listen to and tag 10 of your favorite followers/mutuals!

This is probably going to go past 5 songs. Ha Ha. I just want to share a bunch of songs that I enjoy.

Thank you for the tag, @durotoswrites !

I listen mostly to the songs I grew up on in the 90s and early 2000s. I am not to big on listening to the current songs. I know I am a old / grumpy person. LoL.  Thanks to my Mom, I have a love for 80s and 90s Country as that is all that played in the car when we went anywhere. Then my Dad always played the Oldies which would have been from the 60s and 70s when I was little.

I also love any relaxing and ambient videogame soundtracks and I have been getting into the Youtube Lo-fi Music Videos.

But then I also like genres like Nightcore, Celtic, J POP,  K POP, and Fandom Songs.

So my music for this might just be all over the place.

But let’s start with something not on with any of what I just mentioned. Here is a song I found back in the ye-old early days of internet from a creator call Joe Cartoon. He did a lot of funny Flash Animations. This song has stuck with me however and I think a lot of people can relate to it with the idea of wanting to have the courage and freedom to do what you want to do and not be stuck working a job you hate and answering to someone for your whole life. 

1. Joe Cartoon - Dancing Monkey Don't Never Get To Be Kong 

Next song is from Celtic Woman and my husband is actually the one who found it. This woman’s voice is so beautiful. 

2. Celtic Woman - Fields Of Gold

How about some songs from my favorite K POP Band? Orange Caramel. Their music videos are always so odd and cute. 

3. Orange Caramel(오렌지캬라멜) _ Lipstick(립스틱)

4. ORANGE CARAMEL '까탈레나(Catallena)

60s and 70s anyone?

5. Sam Cooke - Cupid

6. Anne Murray -  I Just Fall In Love Again

7.  MUD -Dynamite- - The groups outfits and dancing are on point!

Fandom Songs.....I regret nothing.

8. My Little Pony - Discord (Remix) - Eurobeat Brony

9. Five Nights At Freddy’s -  FNAF SONG ▶ "Let Me Through" (ft. Dolvondo) [SFM] | CG5

10. Bendy and the Ink Machine -  CG5 × DAGames - Children of the Machine (Bendy and the Dark Revival Song Animation)

Okay I will wrap it up and end on the banger that no one can hate.

11. The Goofy Movie - Eye to Eye

I tag anyone who sees this and wants to play.

[raeman-ray]

its 12 in tha morning and i just finished this what yall think :33333

[terriblygrimm]

I JUST WANT NOMAD STEVE AND WHITE WOLF BUCKY!!!! like come on!!!!!! they actually developed additional superhero identities!! it’s fuckin meant to be bitch!!!!!!!!!!

[avosettas]

HERE AT THE HABITAT, WE HAVE A STRICT BEDDY-TIME :-)