#idk how to explain it in english...
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been thinking a lot about womanhood lately
#like. i don't exactly identify as being a woman. in contrast i do have a strong nonbinary/muunsukupuolinen identity#yet i do feel and acknowledge that in most contexts i AM a woman#not only because that's what most of the world sees me as but that's also consecuently how i move through the world#there is no one set way for women to experoence the world but i do feel like my experience is one of those. because i am gendered as a woman#it used to make me uncomfortable and dysphoric and i'm not saying that now it never does#but i have made my peace with it? like. i feel like i have “let womanhood in” as a part of my identity#and i have also realized that it's not actually being seen as a woman that makes me uncomfortable but being seen SOLELY as a woman#like my friends calling me a woman or my partner calling me their girlfriend doesnt sting usually#because i know they also see the other parts of my gender identity#but when a coworker refers to me with she/her or includes me in “ladies” it stings. because i know that's all they see#like YES i can be a woman. if you acknowledge that i am a bit of a weird woman.#i can be a woman if you acknowledge that i am a gnc woman. a bisexual woman. a queer woman. a woman who is sometimes bit of a man.#if you see and acknowledge that we can talk#however i am NOT a nonbinary woman. i am nonbinary AND a woman. which to some people is the same thing#but to me it's an important distinction. being nonbinary and being a woman are both parts of my gender identity but in very different ways#and very distinctively. lumping them together as equal parts of my identity as i feel the term “nonbinary woman” does doesn't describe me#i am enthusiastically nonbinary. i am begrudgingly a woman. i'm a woman with a long footnote explanation. woman¹#“nonbinary woman” also doesnt feel like it accommodates the way i relate to manhood or boyhood. but that's a whole another tedtalk#i'm not a man but i like how it looks. and i'm not a man i'm just borrowing parts of it for genderfuckery reasons#idk how to explain it in english...#in finnish i would say that en oo mies mut joskus lainaan tai iahn vaa ihailen asioita mieheyden kuvastosta.#but because in social situations and In Our Society That We Live In you mostly can just choose one gender and it's either man or a woman#thennout of those i would rather be a woman. legally. with strangers. you know. not a woman but kind of yes because i relate to other women#if i could be seen only as nonbinary i would. but then again my nonbinaryness does encompass some parts of both womanhood and manhood.#so i guess people would have trouble seeing it as “only nonbinsry”#idk man. it's complicated and also changes emphasis multiple times a year#ask me again a month from now and the gender landscape will be interpreted completely differently#gender#nowe talks
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN "THE SPARK IS GIVING THE BOYFRIEND CANCER"??????
I'm rolling with the idea from idw about "Cybertronian energy being radioactive to humans"
In the Sins of the wreckers it revealed that Verity(human) is dying because Cybertronian energy gave her cancer. It wasn't only spark energy though, it was also Aequitas. But still. Hanging out with the Wreckers was slowly damaging her health.
#mecha pilot jazz au#also sparks are giving me a lot of nuclear reactor vibes#especially with the way they do WHAAABOOOM when the mech has some kind of spark failure#in the Kup spotlight it was shown that you technically can make a spark fucking explode#if you scare and push a mech to their limits hard enough#idk how to explain it better with English words mhmhmg
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Why people don't like 3rd person pov? Genuinely asking because as a non native I prefer 3rd person. And tbh it doesn't matter to me anyways, sometimes I read books till the middle and realise they're 3rd pov (maybe I shouldn't say that💀) but my point is both are easy for me to understand and doesn't matter to me.
#tiktok is so determent to say 3rd pov is hard to understand and I'm like...#how?#I started reading in english with fanfics and most of fanfics are 3rd pov#now 2nd person is what I dislike lol#specially those character x readers...#and that's because I don't like to imagine myself with my favorite characters? Damn idk how to explain#it's a me problem#bookish#books#booktok#booklr#bookstagram#booklover
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A quick Micoboy (not as quick as you may think tho)
#bloodborne#micolash#painting like gives me like anxiety#but like in my hands#like when you dont want to do something and want to finish quickly#idk how to explain it in my own fucking language let alone in english#*painting like this
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hike in oasis springs
#paolo rocca#knox greenburg#the sims 4 townies#ts4 townies#the sims 4#fanart#paolox#je suis fatigue!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#eee im so emo abt them im gonna ramble but#i draw them being party rats mostly but it balances perfectly w knox's outdoor activities.....#to me they're extreme guys. theyll get wasted on parties one day#and theyll improvise a 3 days escapade in nature or wherever right after#so yea. MY ENGLISH IS AWFUL IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN#anyhow. “will you go hiking with me” is the most romantic thing knox asked paolo so far. so far#(even tho stuff happened between them but its strictly within bro code so it doesn't count apparently.)#SIGH....AND THEYRE NOT EVEN BOYFRIENDS.........#theyll get there eventually. im cheering on them (i hate them)#theyre doing things to my head thats not. FUNNY#they foucked during that hike btw not that anyone cares#wow heehee i said too much here.
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extremely novel things happening in the kidnap preview: threatened/impending separation by way of not the USA! but canada
#how do they come up with it!!! lady gaga in sunglasses meme.jpeg!!#sorry sorry. i kid.#actually iirc in only boo there was a threat of Being Sent To Dad In New Zealand so maybe they're covering their english speaking bases#the vibe on this series continues to be incredibly odd to me but i think i might be getting into it finally. maybe. idk#min DID for sure get me when he was explaining that he decided love should be spelled with a q in it. VERY stupid! i adore it!#*#kidnap the series
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no one can reach my level of petty hating about the stupid english title
#ada speaks#after scott made that thread about how the legitimately valid complaints about infinite wealth's loc didn't matter because of sales#i was like. god damn dude. like what a. horrible reality. so i'm voting with my money. i guess.#not that theres ANY FUCKING WAY to make these things known when there's nuance to it that Sales Numbers obviously can't convey#im just another +1 to the jp sales number and i'm fairly sure they count everything as Worldwide due to eng being included in all regions#but !! at least i dont have fucking. pirate yakuza or whatever the hell that english title is sitting on my shelf#and the other really fun thing is that availability of the game in canada is total ass and exclusive to some random online retailer#i cant preorder from....... fucking gamestop?? ok i guess it's amazon jp time. since this is. somehow easier.#anyway. hey sega. can we fucking talk about your english loc team and crunch and simulreleases.#can we maybe like. release a Good product and not a product that Sells.#these games are going to sell regardless because. the GAMES are good#people are going to buy them for The Core Game. and they are going to Put Up With the shitty localization.#im just. man. remember when SoA used to be proud of what they put out there. what a crazy concept.#if you're pointing to sales numbers to Own The Haters idk what to tell you. i think the haters might have a point. just this time.#you can't genuinely defend how undercooked and sloppy it is by explaining specific choices made or being informative#like so many times in the past#so its just.#lol suck it the games still sell#like yeah no shit. obviously??????????? but why in gods name should we have to Settle for a lesser experience#just because corporate wants a Finished product and not a Good one#frustrating <3#god forbid art be anything but a consumable slop product with a Serviceable translation#to me this is one step removed from shipping it without any translation and being like lol just use google translate bro#and when everyone is like ????? what the fuck???? its like well it still sells. so clearly this is what the people want.#boooooooooo
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Is it just me or arthur looks way more surperior than ds dream
Arthur von licht by onebizarrekai
#dreamswap#fatal flaws#arthur von licht#arthur just hits me so hard maann😭#he has this 'powerful' vibe#its just— he looks like he knows what he was doing#he isnt insanely straight up imprisoning people#and he definitely hiding something#which we all probably figured it out already..#but im excited to know more what's going on this lore#nebula doodles#forgive my english#IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS#i swear#this is getting crazier#still both of them can be workalcoholic#Bro fatal flaws had fucked me up#and im loving it#dreamtale
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#been thinking about getting something fun and pride themed as a treat for myself#but every time i go look at things it hits me how i'm like#feeling like i'm becoming increasingly alienated with western constructs of queerness#like i still identify with these labels and i know your definition of a labelled identity is what you want it to be but#that doesn't prevent you from having to deal with what other people make of it#i'm not articulating this right but just. well#idk i guess i am once again just wishing queer expression hasn't been so defined by the west#the most accurate term for my partner and i doesn't exist in english. how do i explain that to people#delete later#ashton originals
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oh god. oh no. oh god oh no oh god i found the soapbox again. oh good heavens i'm climbing up onto it. oh NO someone left me a megaphone again. i can't stop myself......i can't.....fight it.........i just......
SOMETHING I REALLY LOVE ABOUT TQ IS THE LODGE
lmfao but fr tho, from the moment you step foot into hackett lodge, it feels warm, and it feels homey, and it feels lived in - a stark contrast to blackwood lodge, which is, from the prologue, cold and austere and menacing. in ud, you know the lodge isn't safe from the get-go. you hold your breath when you're exploring it, jumping at every creak of the floorboards. hackett lodge, on the other hand, just.......it's wood paneled and cozy. when the golden hour light comes in through the slats of the blinds, it feels nostalgic. safe. the creaks and sighs of it settling on its bones are expected and almost welcome. it is comfortable, it is maybe a little warmer than you want it to be, it smells faintly of sap and someone else's laundry detergent.
and it is a death trap.
#queenie rambles about supermassive#clearly i'm having Feelings as i work on#the hacketts#im an until dawn girlie until the end OBVIOUSLY and i do think the quarry is p hugely flawed BUT#i do so love the juxtaposition of the lodges#not to get too english class on main but i think it really sort of...succinctly explains how i imagine jack vs the hacketts themselves#blackwood is frigid and unyielding and no one is coming to help you#you have to do everything yourself and you have to hold your breath while doing it#hacketts quarry is warm and beautiful and welcoming and you know where everything is right off the bat#it's HOMEY and it's COZY and that's all just one big fucking lie to cover up what's hiding beneath it#idk im doing a new playthru for some fic details and i just...really love hacketts quarry and how different it is from blackwood#i just want to hang out in chris's office know what i mean? i want to explore all the rooms and sit in the sun#in blackwood i just sort of...want to leave as fast as humanly possible#so much for succinct alksdjflksdjflksdjflksjdkfj
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Carol and Rupert designs! :D
Gosh, i love this woman a lot, AND BABY PRICE, i actually went with playing with military uniform/gear designs, and decided that his is modified (by himself with the permission of Galeforce).
Still, next ones should be Dave and Jhonny and Henry/or Charles. Also idk if it would be better to make a side blog for this, debating it(and yeah if you got asks abt their designs and some lore, feel free to ask :D)
And, some doodles


#carol cross#rupert price#thsc#thsc fanart#thsc fandom#burt curtis#Carol is Big Momma!#but even if she kinda looks a bit like Ellie there are some differences from when i came up with her design#ah yeah#the great dynamic and lore of Rupert's love choices is what has been eating my brain#guess i'll explain it when i get to like learn how to manage other blog#i want to make it like a comic or graphic novel but idk i happen to not be good write LESS WITH ME CONFUSING SPANISH AND ENGLISH#also designs are based of my own analysis of the characters and trying to put it into realistic terms?#but they still are silly sticks
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Hi!! You're free to ignore this if it doesn't interest you ofc but I wanted to talk a bit about the "Aventurine racism" thing. It's mostly people not reading things right and misinterpreting things (as always.)
Aventurine is said to be Sigonian, a race known for being untrustworthy. Now, "Sigonian" is not a reference to any real place or community, in any language. It's entirely made up and exists only within the honkai universe. The reason people started speculating that he is Romani is because he calls himself "Avgin", which the game translates as "honey", and "Avgin" is indeed the romani word for "honey". This, of course, doesn't prove he's Romani or based on any Romani culture at all, but people took it and ran with it.
Ratio called him "Sigonian thrall" and, since Romani people have suffered a lot with slavery, people started freaking out. The thing is, Aventurine is a slave, but it has nothing to do with any Romani inspiration or traits he might have. Aventurine is a slave because he works for the IPC, and a good majority of IPC workers are enslaved to the IPC. He's not even the first character to be shown to have a branding mark. Topaz, who I didn't see anyone complaining about, is also enslaved to the IPC and has the same marking on her neck.
It should also be noted that although both Sparkle and Ratio were racist towards Aventurine, the "race" being discriminated against is entirely fictional and not meant to represent any real ethnicity or culture. We should keep in mind that the story is set in a magical universe, and we have nearly no information on Sigonians or Sigonia-IV.
Personally - and this is just my own theory/interpretation - I don't think Ratio was being racist at all. Judging by how the IPC operates, Sigonia-IV has most likely been destroyed or suffered a great disaster, so his claim of Aventurine being a "Sigonian thrall" could've been just a mention to how he has nowhere to run from the IPC, since his home world is gone. Also, Sparkle is just mean, and not really a trustworthy source of information - her comment on Sigonians being notoriously untrustworthy could be her own personal opinion rather than fact (of course, we don't have enough information on this to claim that it's just her opinion, nor that it isn't.).
Sorry for the long ask! I also have more to say about the possibility of Aventurine being romani if it interests you, based on him being a Su expy.
thanks for explaining this further, i dont really have anything add to it other that i share your interpretation there but i think its interesting for the others to see as well (this entire topic is tiring me out but mostly bc of some ppl taking it to extremes or making stuff up to prove their points. thanks for taking the time to write and explain all this!!)
#i said to my friend too that i simply dont think ratio meant it in such a harmful way as sparkle did#i cant explain it well in english but i feel it doesnt make sense regarding his character#and how he wants to cure ppl from “stupidity” as a doctor helping#and then be condescending bc of someones home world or harmful stereotypes#hed rather yell at you for saying smth outrageously stupid or smth idk....#maybe its just my interpretation#meanwhile sparkle clearly meant to offend/rile aventurine up#reply
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My English teacher asked me to prove that Nick isn't an unbiased narrator. Like... idk, look at the story for two seconds?
#tgg#the great gatsby#nick carraway#english#classic literature#idk how to explain it#other than “... because he's biased in every part of the story”#unreliable narrator#no hate to her#she's cool
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trampoline gymnastics and synchronized diving seems the type of sports a murdered heiress would do in a agatha christie’s novel
#it has such an old hollywood/1920’s vaibe 2 it#maybe bc it combines raw strength with beauty of form idk how to explain it in english
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Me: hey what if I write a fic where Jayce speaks Spanish
Also me: bro this is Runterra they don’t even have Mexico
#it’s like that thing in dnd where it’s like ‘how can there be champagne they don’t even have France’#like would they still call it Spanish????#like obviously there’s canon languages in league lore n obviously he’s supposed to be Latino (his mom’s name is Ximena) but like#would they still call it Spanish??? they never even had Spain#I assume Velarían is their equivalent to English bc it’s basically common but like#how would one explain this in a fic#idk I only briefly played league in high school I might as well have never played#anyways#runterra#league of legends#arcane#arcane: league of legends#arcane league of legends#arcane lol#jayce talis
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Antis would kill me if I said one of my f/os is 8 years old
#there is like one episode were she is a adult tho#but in all the show she is a kid and I honestly dont care#I just dont talk about her here because its not a english show so idk how to explain it lol#proship safe#proshipper safe#proship selfship#proselfship#selfship proship#pro selfship#proselfshipping#selfproship#antis dni#antis do not interact
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