#im allowed to have One cringe moment ok. ok cool

[slimespecter]

i thought of something funnier than 24

[stained-glass-spirit]

ok, the fact that he was my first major fictional crush aside, its absolutely ridiculous how much asriel means to me as a character lol. when i was going thru years of abuse in my teens, one of the things i told myself early on was that i had to survive because i wanted an imaginary flower prince to be proud of me. or i'd picture him calling me an idiot and telling me it was stupid that i gave up.

i remember literally screaming when i saw his name drop in the original survey program and that he was ALL GROWN UP and in FUCKING COLLEGE (which was mind blowing to 14 y/o me)

a world

where this guy got to grow up

i could picture him getting to grow up with me or frisk just fine in my own self indulgent fanfics i guess, but this was like, an official thing so i was going CRAZY!! like.....

like i was going to see him one day when everything was all better. like. its like a wife seeing her army husband finally come home from a war, in my head, in terms of the seriousness. its so fucking stupid and ridiculous! i genuinely like. still keep telling myself. "im not allowed to kill myself i have to see my husband home from the war" about this fucking guy ?!

its rly not shocking that the moment i fell back into my utdr phase i immediately descended into desperate scrambling madness to write a cool story involving him. unfortunately for him, the player is kind of like a god, and i like weird stories with extremely nonsensical eldritch madness... and i think itd be funny to see him deal with being on the receiving end of it from someone who really loves him, in a strange, traumatized way

i may be cringe, but i suppose i'm free

even if all i can do is sit in my room most of the time :)

[anordinarymuse]

sweets I.

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary : you’re new to school and meet eddie for the first time, only to be caught by your brother jason

Warnings : swearing; jason’s sister; weed; unedited.

Word Count : fucking long (2.5k)

A/N : i tried. i really did try.

credit to @0who-cares0 for the inspo + letting me use your prompt !

maybe a pt.2 idk ?

navigation.

request here.

“Are you sure people won’t think I’m strange for joining halfway into second semester?” You ask your brother Jason in the car on your way to Hawkins High School.

Your parents had divorced and before this past move, you lived with your mom. But after countless fights, having a difficult relationship with your boarding school, and missing your dad and brother, your mom, bitter as she was, allowed you to move back in with your dad.

“You’re my sister, Y/N, don’t worry about it,” Jason replies cooly with one hand on the wheel while using the other to adjust his hair.

“Yeah but-”

“Look, we both know you were popular at your old school, and that was on the west coast,” Jason begins, taking a sip of gas station Coke before continuing lightly, “We’re in fucking Indiana, you’ll be just fine.”

Before you have the chance to respond, Jason swerves into the High School parking lot, breaking harshly into a parking spot. Before he’s even parked you notice how a swarm of letterman jackets crowd around the car. Jason practically leaps out of the car and after taking a deep breath, you follow.

When you step out onto the pavement, you’re basically ignored, everyone’s attention glued to Jason. But once Jason raises his voice, his crowd goes silent.

“Guys,” he paused to motion over at you. “This is my sister, Y/N.”

“Hi,” you say, smiling cheerfully while edging with nerves.

After the shortest moment of silence a strawberry blonde girl pipes up, offering a small wave, “Hi! Im Chrissy.”

“You’re Jason’s girlfriend, right?” You ask, thanking her silently in your head for saying something before it got awkward. You noticed then she looked vaguely of familiar.

“Yup!” Chrissy giggles, her high ponytail swaying as she spoke. “I can walk you to your first class if you want.”

“Yeah, I’d appreciate that,” you nod, grateful for the guidance since you felt embarrassed having Jason walk you around.

“Kay, cool,” Chrissy grins, fixing her skirt before turning to your brother and giving him a passionate kiss. “See you ‘round babe.”

You try your hardest not to cringe as Jason pulls her in, his arm tight around her waist and other hand dangerously close to her ass.

“See you after third hour,” Jason grins, giving her another peck before Chrissy leaves.

As you turn to follow Chrissy into the school, you try erase the disturbing memory of watching your brother kiss a girl you’d just met in person for the first time.

Your parents had already set everything up your schedule, locker, and besides you sort of knew where things were because you visited Jason last year. You were supposed to go to the office and meet someone there, but by the time Chrissy finished her tour the warning bells were ringing.

“Thanks so much Chrissy,” you say as she drops you off at class.

“No problem, are you planning on trying out for cheer next year?” She asks, pulling you aside so people can get through the door.

“Jason suggested I should, so I think I might,” you reply. “I’m not very good though.”

“I’m sure you’re great, plus I can help you during the summer and stuff.”

“Really? Ok, thanks!”

“Yeah, no problem!” Chrissy says excitedly before turning her heel to leave. “See you later, Y/N.”

You bite the inside of your lip as Chrissy leaves, then you enter the classroom and sit in a random seat near the back of the room.

Class begins and it’s boring as ever. Every couple minutes you find yourself checking the clocking, wondering if time is moving any faster than before.

Then suddenly, with about twenty minutes left of class the classroom door swings open. A tall guy, who looked a couple of years older than you, with long brown shaggy hair and arms covered in tattoos clambers in.

“You’re late, Munson,” the teacher says sharply as the boy falls into the only empty seat.

“Didn’t mean it,” the boy shrugs with a condescending smile as he leans low into his seat.

“Open your textbook to page 183 and read the first paragraph,” the teacher snaps back, obviously unhappy with the recent addition to the class. “After you Munson…you in the back, what’s your name?”

“Me?” You ask, shrinking slightly in your chair as the teacher stares at you dead in the eye.

“Yes, you.”

“Y/N Carver…”

“You’re next. Munson, begin reading, please.”

After your turn reading the class continued on with an odd tension pulsating in the air. You caught yourself glancing over at Munson, you couldn’t help but stare at his tattoos, rings, and shirt that read “hellfire club”. Compared to your current surroundings it was just so…so different…?

Time passed and you saw him less and less, especially after Spring Break when your classes got switches. You heard about Munson surprisingly often since people were always saying things. Jason always seemed to have something to say, that's when you turned face. But you rarely saw him.

The school year quickly came to and end and you spent the majority of your summer training for cheer tryouts with Chrissy. You also visited your mom for one weekend and regularly went to the arcade with Jason. By the end of summer you knew every cheer by heart and placed fourth on the pac-man machine.

Once school started again, Munson was the last thing on your mind. You’d completely forgotten about him until the second week when you saw three freshman wearing the “hellfire club” shirts. By now you’d heard all the rumors surrounding Munson, and you wondered if he’d graduated or if was repeating again.

Homecoming was in a week and a half and you stared at yourself in the changing room mirror, righting your high ponytail and raising the waistband of your cheer skirt. You’d easily been let onto the cheer team and you smiled at yourself in your cheer uniform.

“Ready?” Chrissy asks as she washes her hands in the sink next to you.

“Of course, we better win the game next week or else it’ll be so fucking embarrassing,” you joke.

“We’ll win and if we don’t it’s rigged,” Chrissy replies. “Plus, we haven’t lost a game the whole season yet.”

“I know what you’re saying.”

“What am I saying?” She asks innocently.

“You’re all giddy because it’s your boyfriend who’s the star player.”

“He’s your brother.”

“Ugh, don’t say he’s my brother after I say he’s your boyfriend-“

“GIRLS LETS MOVE!” The cheer coach shouts into the changing room, the door slamming behind her.

At the demand of your coach Chrissy and you run out to the football for the homecoming pep rally. As the cheer team tumbles onto the field the stands are shaking with excitement. Students are screaming and cheering as the team stunts and poms.

After the cheer team cheers, you knew Jason, as captain of the football team, would say a speech and then the rally would be over. So instead of listening to the heartwarming message of your brother, you slip away from the crowd to around the back of the school for a breath.

Absentmindedly, you wander far away from the football field finding yourself lingering in an area of the campus you’ve never been in before.

Dusting off your cheer skirt before sitting on the dirt, you yelp as someone bumps into you from the side.

“Holy shit,” a low voice grunts, stumbling to stand up straight without falling beside you. “Sorry, didn’t see you there.”

“Who are- wait a minute, Eddie Munson?” You blurt out accidentally, only realizing how creepy you sounded, knowing you’d never formally met him, after you’d said it.

“Do I…Do I know you?” Eddie asks, looking down at you curiously.

“Uhm…you were in my Physics class last year, that’s- that’s how I know you,” you reply.

As you stare at Eddie, you smile to yourself seeing that he still wears his hellfire shirt. You noticed he’d grown out his hair and he had the lingering scent of freshly smoked weed.

“And you are?” Eddie asks, eyeing your cheer uniform suspiciously.

“Y/N Carver.”

Suddenly, Eddie jumps back, checking his surroundings distrustfully. He then asks, his voice strained, “Your brother sent you here, didn’t here? To fuck with me?”

You blink, furrowing you brows, it takes you a moment to understand what Eddie meant, but when you did you shot up from your seated position, “What?! Jason?! No, I swear he didn’t. He’s doing his pep rally stuff, I just needed a- a breath.”

“Look here sweets, I don’t want- I’m not trying to fuck with you,” Eddie stumbles on his words and it’s obvious he’s racking his brain for a narrow escape. “Or Jason really for that matter.”

“I’m not here because of Jason, I’m here cause I don’t want to be at the pep rally. It’s stuffy and loud, and too- too- too midwest for me. I don’t not like it- it’s just that it’s-“ you halt trying to find the right words, your mind stuck on the fact he just called you sweets, it made your cheeks warm. "It’s just too much.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

The two of you go abnormally quiet, filling up the space is the sound of breeze and trees rustling. The scent of weed brought from Eddie traveled around you, it was a type of mesmerizing intoxication.

“Are you high?” You ask, staring into Eddie’s eyes for redness or dilated pupils.

“Unfortunately not,” Eddie laughs before asking slowly. “You don’t smoke…do you?”

“I did,” you shake your head. Cheeks flushing from embarrassment as you think back to when you’d sneak out to buy a join from some sketchy dealer in a hoodie. “I used to live in California.”

“Wow, would not expect that from someone like- like you,” Eddie motions to your cheerleader uniform. Something about you suddenly interested him. This kind of thing only happened in movies, where a girl was this preppy kind of perfect but was actually sort of like- like him.

“Thanks, I only stopped because I can’t find any weed here, and I’m not about to ask my brother, even though…never mind.”

Eddie stalls before laughing, “I lied.”

“What?” You exclaim, giggling as Eddie deviously hops around in excitement.

“I’m a liar, here see,” Eddie pulls out a fresh joint from his pocket. You take it delicately from the palm of his hand. Eddie’s breath wavers as your hand touches him, it felt almost electric. “Just rolled it.”

You hold the joint in your hand, eyes wide at the sight, you didn’t think anybody had weed, let alone knew about it in Indiana, and the only thing you could say was, “Do you have a light?”

“‘Course sweets.”

“Sweets,” you repeat your new nickname, loving the way he said it in his stupid Midwest accent that made everything drawl just a little longer.

“Sweets, it fits,” Eddie grins, pacing the leaf littered dirt restlessly, the fresh scent of weed waking him up while his eyes are almost watering at the sight of you taking a hit.

You were stunning, Eddie had decided that the second he spotted you in his dedicated smoking spot. But now with a blunt between your pink full lips, damn, it was torture.

“So what is it? The hellfire club?” You ask, motioning to Eddie's shirt while plopping down on the dirt, trying to make yourself comfortable against a bumpy tree trunk.

“Oh this!” Eddie exclaims. “Me and my friends we play DnD.”

“DnD?”

“Dungeons and Dragons?”

“Never heard of it.”

“Never heard of it? It’s the best game ever!”

“Teach me?”

“Mhm- sure- let me have a hit,” Eddie nods passively, not believing your telling the truth, which you take note of. Meanwhile, he slips the joint from your fingers, takes a hit, then funnels the smoke upwards in a straight shot.

While adjusting how you sat yourself on the ground, you ask in a quiet voice, like you were telling a secret, “Can I tell you something?”

“Hm?” Eddie nods, biting back a smile, loving the way it felt like you were revealing this big secret you’ve kept down forever.

You pause before speaking on a tangent, “I think you’re really cool, since I first saw you too, with your rings and with your hair and the tattoos and- hm- yeah.”

“Can I tell you something?” Eddie fake falls, which makes you laugh, before plopping down to sit across from you.

“Go ‘head,” you nod slowly, taking another hit between nods.

“I didn’t think you were like this,” Eddie motions his arms to you.

“Like…like what?”

After a moment of thought, grinning, Eddie responds with, “Metal.”

���Metal?”

“Cool, I dunno know, neat, just metal. You’re metal.”

You laugh hysterically at Eddie, coughing as smoke gets caught in your lungs. Eddie’s smiles before breaking out into a laugh as well, you were contagious.

“Ok- Then here- I think, I think that you’re metal too,” you decide, leaning forward to take a hit from Eddie’s hand, but as you shift your weight, you move to fast and almost fall your face.

“Woah, careful, you’re out pretty fast huh,” Eddie catches you then looks into your eyes and noticed how dilated your pupils are.

“What?” You blink, missing what he said.

“Nothing,” Eddie dismisses it, letting smoke seep from his lips in a thin line.

“Can I show you a trick? C’mere,” You grin sinfully, sneaking a hit of the joint before unfolding onto all fours, moving towards Eddie.

You were slightly intoxicated, you could feel it in your head, but something about being looser made Eddie’s brown eyes shimmer like honey and you couldn’t help but stare. Which made Eddie uneasy as your wide eyes stared without blinking, but at the same time it was captivating as fuck, almost doll-like.

“Uh- oh- ok,” Eddie stumbles, leaning back on the edges of his palms as you approache him, startled by your forwardness.

“Stay still,” you demand, grabbing Eddie by the shoulders, pulling him forward while crawling into his lap. His legs were relaxed and angled outward, so you fit perfectly between them.

Before pulling yourself in close to Eddie’s face, you take a deep hit of his joint, then using your thumb, you pull apart Eddie’s lips, as you do so a low whimper escapes from his throat.

With the smoke from your last hit caught in your cheeks, slowly you separate your own lips, blowing the smoke into Eddie’s mouth.

You can hear Eddie’s heartbeat and it matches the rhythm of the pounding in your head. Your only seconds away from touching his lips with yours. He was so inviting, the way he was propped up just for you as if waiting for you to make the first move.

Eddie’s breath was at loss, he could barely grasp what was happening. The smoke from your lips whispered down his throat, warming his body. He could feel his boner in jeans, pushing at the fabric, but he tried to keep it tucked away.

He watched as your pupils glanced down at his lips, which sent him to delusion, before searching for permission. Eddie gave the slightest nod forward before closing his eyes bracing himself for a kiss.

You inched forward, letting the last of the smoke wisp from the spaces between front teeth. The crown of his lips brushed up against yours and just as you were about to sink yourself in deeper-

“GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY SISTER YOU FUCKING FREAK,” you hear Jason roar as he runs towards you. Your head snaps in his direction and you watch in horror as he pushes you aside to take Eddie by the collar.

“Shit,” Eddie cusses under his breath as he scrambles to stand up from beneath you.

“Stop it, Jason,” you warn, watching as he takes Eddie’s by the shirt, bunching up his collar.

Jason turns to you, his jaw was strained and eyes darkened with rage. He looks you up and down before abruptly letting go of Eddie, then he pushes up your chin with his hand, glaring into your eyes. “Are you fucking high?”

“What-?” You exclaim, stumbling back away from your brother, hating the way he looked down on you with pity and rage.

Jason then turns back to Eddie, “You did this to her. You fucking made her do this you shithead.”

Before a second more passes Eddie’s on the ground getting demolished by your brother. You try to pry Jason back but he’s stronger than you, so you can do nothing but watch in horror.

“Jason, stop it! Eddie didn’t make me do anything,” you desperately try to explain, still attempting to get in between the two of them.

“I’m going to fucking kill you,” Jason sneers at Eddie, shaking you off as you try to grab Jason by the shoulder to pull him off.

Eddie on the other hand gives up, not because he didn’t have the strength, but because he far too out of it to comprehend exactly what was going on. Every so often, Eddie throws a punch, and is satisfied when blood begins to drip down Jason’s nose.

“JASON!” You scream, shrinking into your body when your hear a crack. “STOP IT!”

“Stand the fuck back, Y/N,” Jason warns, his glare narrowed at you, blood trickling down his nose. You stumble back, you’d never seen your brother likes this before, and suddenly you were very afraid. “This fucking freak is getting what he deserves.”

Finally, Jason stands up, wipes the blood from his face and kicks Eddie’s shins. Instantly you kneel to the ground to see if Eddie’s ok. Jason scoffs as you use your hair bow to wipe off the blood on Eddie’s forehead.

Even though everything’s a little blurry, Eddie can see the worry painted all over your expression, so he heaves out a weak, "It's all good sweets,” between coughs while clutching his stomach.

"I'm sorry," you whisper, pushing away the fly-away hairs that crowded his face. You stomach tumbles as you stare at the pain written all over Eddie's eyes even though he smiles.

Before you get the chance to say or do anything else, Jason grabs you and tears you away roughly by the shoulder. "Get the fuck away from him, Y/N."

"Jason-! Stop it-!" You try to push him off but his grasp is too strong. "Let go of me-!"

"Let's go," Jason ignores you cries and drags you away. All you can do is follow your brother out of the woods while looking over your shoulder. As you blink back the lump in your throat you stare helpless at Eddie's wearied body until it disappears behind the trees.

**********

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[magstorrn]

ok i am desperately trying to remember as much as i can from sonic 2 (will be seeing it again in a couple days) but a few things that i loved/noticed

- i know that a few people were worried (including me) about them leaning too heavily toward the superhero angle with the whole blue justice thing, but that was mercifully really short and was just a way of showing how sonic was being overly reckless/arrogant! and it was nice to see them showing that side of him too

- i just have to say. the winter soldier line WAS annoying, but that fucking pay off?? the whole ‘bucky saves steve’ thing but with knuckes and sonic?? hello? IM LOSING IT

- unfortunately i found jim carrey insufferable in this movie but my guy deserves credit for giving 200%

- i didn’t find the movie particularly funny at any point and in fact there were many bits i found just unbelievably cringe (the siberian dance off, for one - uptown funk is so old now?? the adventure pose maybe JUST saves it). i mean... did we really need a flossing reference in both movies

- but that negative stuff aside, this was just so clearly a movie by fans for fans and i honestly think that’s why critics dont like it. the audience of this film is either a) sonic fans or b) kids and there is no in-between

- on that note!! i was LIVING for the interactions between tails + knuckles + sonic, it’s such a blessed dynamic and i loved how they all got to individually play off each other.

- there were so many facets to knuckles too - his gullibility, his vulnerability, his longing for a family, his strength and honour, his ruthlessness... like they allowed him to be a bit dumb and clueless without making him a complete joke which i adored

- knuckles and sonic bonding over their difficult pasts and sonic not blaming knuckles for longclaw’s death was really nice? like sonic really didn’t want to fight him. and BABY KNUCKLES. knuckles’ dad! ken penders is losing his shit

- this movie was just so deeply and unashamedly earnest (even with the power of friendship stuff and emphasis on family!!) that i couldnt help but smile through most of it. 

- oh man, i just. all the clever references to the games?? the sonic 06 reference! the unleashed reference! even the thing with the chilli dog falling from the sky felt like a black knight reference!!

- seriously was losing my fucking MIND during the super sonic scene. it just encapsulated for me how long it feels since ive seen a movie like this that gives the fans what they want! I mean?? the chaos emeralds?? sonic’s design including the floating quills and the red eyes?? he looked soOOOO COOL

- knuckles talking about ice cream DID NOT DISAPPOINT. i really didnt expect them all to be just hanging out together at the end but that fucken killed me man

- GUN!!!

- TONED DOWN OLIVE GARDEN REFERENCES THANK YOU

- the human characters 100% got shafted but uhhh. i didnt mind it all that much?? and there was that huge moment with maddie and tom accepting sonic as their son and sonic talking tom dad like,.. that’s pretty important

- colleen was soooo good she just seamlessly slotted in and it was so nice to hear her voice throughout!!

- i loved seeing how the bits in the trailers were chopped and changed and moved out of context, it was cool to see how everything actually slotted together in the movie

- it was interestng how they’ve made it so the chaos emeralds are components of the master emerald rather than a separate thing? to the point where super sonic was said to have absorbed the power of the master emerald rather than the chaos emeralds... but its nbd tbh

- SHADOW SHADOW SHADOW!!!!! SHadoW!! he looked so good - if anything it looked like the red fur around his eyes was more obvious? he also looked kinda sad : ‘( i cannot wait to see his final design! so i assume the next movie is going to be pretty much just sa2 with a few changes? it doesnt really surprise me - shadow is just way too popular, and it felt like it was foreshadowed by the sa-2 on the gun helicopter. i like to think this means amy will be introduced too!

[captainlevisteacup]

Oooh, an idea has struck. The brothers reacting to Dom Male!MC reuniting with his childhood bestfriend in the Devildom, only their bestfriend is now a high ranking/powerful incubus who has a fuck ton of influence & money. (Not nearly as powerful as any of the brothers or Diavolo, of course, but you get the point)

And while normally a simple childhood friend wouldn’t be enough to bother the brothers, DM!MC’s Femboy CH!Bestfriend is the optimum of gorgeous, with a lithe & toned body and an “innocent” charm to him.

Spoiler Alert, CH!Bestfriend has been in love with DM!MC since they were kids (though it was just puppy love back then) and is determined to never let him get away from him again, resulting in him being extra clingy and needy.

Another Spoiler Alert, DM!MC’s childhood bestfriend may or may not be a mix of a “Worship” & “Self Sacrifice” Yandere.. (Look up “The Dere Types Wiki” if your confused)

You have some very interesting ideas😂 im so sorry this took so long, I didn't want to post it until I was back up to my full working capacity after getting injured and after breaking up with someone😁

Anyways, without further ado, here ya go😘

The Brother's Reactions to M! MC'S Yandere Childhood Incubus! Friend

Warnings: Violence, Language, Blood, VERY SLIGHT sexual themes, some non-consentual touching in Levi's section, brief mention of drugging in Beel's

Lucifer

At first, didn't think twice of MC having a childhood friend

But when he heard the word incubus

He got the smile on his face

You know the one

Lucifer "innocently" is around whenever the incubus is around

Its starts off small

Little poisoned glances from the incubus here and there

But eventually it escalated and turned into him putting a possessive arm around MC's waist

Lucifer snapped

The second the Incubus was alone, Lucifer followed him down an alley

Slammed that fucker against the wall and held him there by the throat

The incubus started laughing, even when Lucifer tightened his grip

"You'll never get rid of me. I have connections to everyone, Fallen Angel. I've loved him since before you even knew he existed, and a prissy peacock like you isnt gonna stop me from making him mine, even if I have to drug and kidnap him"

Lucifer only smiled and released him

The incubus smirked, daintily dusting off his lithe figure

Thinking he won, he shouldered his way past Lucifer

Only to stop short in horror

Deep growls greeted him

Lucifer didn't even bother hiding the screams of the incubus as Cerberus ripped into him

After a while, he signaled Cerberus to stop

As the incubus lies on the ground whimpering, Lucifer calmly says:

"Now that I've shown you just what I'm willing to do to protect MC, I'll make you a deal. MC cares about you, as a FRIEND. But his heart belongs to me and me alone, and mine belongs to him. If you can understand and respect that, I'll allow you near him. But one wrong word, one wrong placement of a hand, and I won't hesitate to finish you off myself. And believe me," he says with a dark chuckle "I won't be as gentle as Cerberus."

Mammon

This man immediately is on high alert

Someone trying to take what's HIS?

The incubus makes him more greedy than ever

Decides not to leave MC's side for a second

Even when he's sleeping

When Mammon can't help the incu-bitch (his nickname for the childhood friend) being around, he acts sort of like a child, which makes him look like a dick in comparison to the incubus's calm and innocent facade

Mammon tries to tell MC there's something up, but he just chalks it up to Mammon being Mammon

One day, MC randomly receives news from the human world that his mother contracted something contagious and was placed in ICU

The incu-bitch was, of course, right there when MC started tearing up, letting him cry into his shoulder

Mammon sees this and starts to protest

This leads MC to snap and tell Mammon he's being a child

Mammon leaves them be and thinks hard

Comes to the conclusion that maybe MC is right, and he begrudgingly decides to apologize to the incubus

As he approaches him, Mammon catches a glimpse of the Incubus's *expensive* phone

Unable to resist, he throws a coin against the wall in the opposite direction.

When he turns to look at the noise, Mammon snatches the phone and yeets off to his room

When he gets there, he opens the phone- no lock- and is startled by what he sees

A fake texting app, along with the messages telling MC his mother was sick

Mammon was about to run to find MC, when he heard a slight chuckle

Looking up, he saw the incubus...holding a knife

"You just couldn't stay away, could you? You've been a pain in the ass ever since I got here. But no matter, once MC sees how *cruel* you are to his defenseless childhood friend, he'll want nothing to do with you. And he'll be mine to fuck and own as I please."

Mammon gritted his teeth and ground out "Making MC think his mother was gravely ill just to get close to him when he's vulnerable? You're disgusting. I actually care about MC, and I respect them more than you ever will."

The incubus snorted, and raised the knife.

"Oi! What do ya think you're doing with that?" Mammon yelled

He raised the knife....and slashed it across his own arm

He then threw the knife towards Mammon, threw himself to the ground, and yelled out in pain

Suddenly, MC burst into the room

Mammon sputtered out a panicked explanation, but MC cut him off with a stare

He kneeled down next to his friend, who reached up with a bloody hand to cup MC'S face

MC put his hand over the incubus's....and sharply bent it backwards

He leaned down and whispered into his ear: "I heard everything, you little shit. Now, get the FUCK out of my house and away from my boyfriend, and don't even THINK of defiling my life with your presence ever again"

After he left, Mammon cautiously said "boyfriend, huh..?"

"Shut up mammon"

Levi

Oh, this won't do

Immediately feels threatened and triggered

He is the avatar of Envy, after all

His response?

Prove to MC nobody can know him as well as he can

He does this every single time the incubus is near

"MC, I got you your favorite drink!"

"MC, I ordered you some food. Don't worry, I already know what you like"

Flinches whenever the incu-bitch touches MC. It literally makes him cringe

His suspicions are confirmed when the incubus shoots Levi a malicious glance next time he touches MC

Levi snaps

Challenges the incubus to a video game duel

He surprisingly accepts

He cheats like hell and beats Levi

Levi goes into his demon form and rages

But MC thinks he's just being a sore loser

He tells Levi to back off and to go cool down

Once Levi storms off, the incu-bitch thanks MC for standing up for him

Then, he promptly tries to make a move on MC

He reaches out a hand to unbutton MC'S shirt

MC slaps his hand away, but not before noticing writing on the Incubus's hand

Before he can pull away, MC snatches his hand and sees cheat codes written on them

Gets super upset and tries to get up to apologize to Levi

The incubus pulls him back down by his wrist and pins them to the couch

"MC, don't you realize? You're all I want, all I need. I WORSHIP you, MC. And you're going to be mine. Nobody else can have you. And you're going to love me, whether you realize it right now or not. You'll learn with time to need me just as desperately as I need you"

Starts to take off MC'S clothes in spite of their fighting and protests, the incubus shushing him

"Shhhh, I know you don't see it, but this will make you see."

Levi slams open the door, tail lashing and face white with rage

"Get your normie hands the fuck off of my human. Now."

The incubus nopes the fuck out. He may be a high ranking incubus, but he still isn't as strong as one of the seven demon brothers.

Levi holds MC tightly as they fumble over an apology

"Shhh MC, its okay. I'm here now. Let's watch some anime and calm down together, yea?"

Satan

Do I even have to explain this one?

Is hostile as soon as MC even MENTIONS a childhood male friend, let alone an INCUBUS

Honestly, the Incubus is a bit scared of Satan

But, he decides he wants MC more than he fears Satan

So, he swallows his fear and patronizes Satan in tiny, unremarkable ways

Ways that would only be noticed by Satan

A stray hand here and there that lingers a LITTLE too long

Wiping a crumb from MC'S lips during a meal

Tucking a stray hair behind MC'S ear

Every last one of these actions makes his blood boil

It gets so bad that Satan is just in a perpetual state of rage, never leaving his demon form

Satan starts passive aggressively insulting the incubus's intelligence

"Oh, you mean you don't know how disestablishmentarianism impacted the overall congruence of Midwest society? Thats odd, its fairly simple. Practically common sense."

Is shocked when MC got livid at him, because he was being condescending for seemingly no reason

Starts to get angry at MC

"Can't you see? He's trying to turn you against me. Just LISTEN, DAMNIT!" He says as he grabs MC'S shoulders

The incubus barges in and shoves Satan away from MC

"Are you ok, MC? Did he hurt you?"

The amount of white hot rage in the room was tangible

He can't do it anymore

Slams the incubus against the wall

Knocks him to the ground

But when he falls down

A bunch of photos fall out of his jacket

Not normal photos

Horrifying ones

One of MC while he showers

One of MC sleeping

One of MC changing

Even one of MC and Satan having a steamy moment

MC goes still...and then SLAPS the shit out of the incubus.

He wordlessly turns to Satan, eyes pleading

"It would be my pleasure, MC" *evil grin*

Cue Satan dragging the incubus off by his hair

Asmo

P A S S I V E A G R E S S I V E

He sees this lovely incubus with NEARLY perfect hair, a lithe and toned body, and a seemingly innocent attitude, and he just wants him gone

He's been with plenty of Incubi, so he knows what they're like

Because of this, he doesn't want this one anywhere NEAR his darling MC

Comes up with a plan to use all his fashion design connections to outdress the incubus

He knows they're vain by nature, so he comes to the conclusion that this is the best course of action

But there's a problem

"Is that a statement piece from Priya Lacroix? She hasn't even released her collection yet"

Asmo.exe is not responding

He knows that HE is the only one Priya would ever give an early release to

So why does THE INCUBUS have her statement piece?

And WHERE is his phone?

Complains to MC, but MC doesn't take him seriously because he's too busy catching up with his friend

Asmo gets jealous and storms off to do a stress relieving skin routine

As MC and the incubus hang out, the incubus's phone goes off

Only...the ringtone is sinful indulgence

Mammon storms into the room

"AHA! I FOUND YA ASMO, YOU ANNOYING LITTLE- huh?"

"I/N? Why do you have Asmo's phone?"

"MC, you have to understand, I just want you to realize I'm the only right one for you. You NEED to realize you can't be with anyone else. Because you're mine, MC. You always have been."

Screeching could be heard in the distance, then footsteps quickly getting closer and closer

"THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY" Asmo yells as he slams open the door

"As if MC would choose a crusty, obsessive, STEALING, lying, probably STD having Incubus like you over me! Now give me my phone back and get out of here. And while you're at it, take off that Priya piece. There's a reason I'm the only one allowed early access."

Beel

Honestly doesn't think that much of it at first

He thinks its nice MC reunited with one of his childhood friends, and an Incubus at that

But when he meets the friend, something just feels off

He gets a weird sensation, and its not hunger

Its like his senses are on red alert

The incubus was nice enough to Beel, seemingly charming and genuine

But Beel couldn't help but feel rubbed the wrong way, with a sensation similar to seaweed against legs in the ocean

He doesn't want to mention this to MC, because he's convinced he's just overreacting

He feels a little sad that MC is too busy for him, but he does his best to give them time together

One night, he had made some food in the kitchen and decided to bring MC and I/N some

When he neared the door, he almost dropped the plate

He heard a loud thud, and MC saying "Hey, I said no, okay?"

He gently opened the door and looked at MC, who immediately forced a smile to his face

"Hey MC, I brought you guys some food. Is everything ok?"

"Thanks Beel, that's sweet of you. Everything's fine, I promise"

Beel relaxed a bit, although he still knew something was off.

The incubus excused himself to use the restroom, encouraging MC to eat without him

Beel and MC sat down, and Beel scarfed down his portion

Chuckling, MC offered his plate to Beel, who gladly accepted

The incubus opened the door shortly after with an expectant look on his face, as well as rope and a gag in his hands

Upon laying eyes on MC, a shocked expression came onto his face as his eyes darted between MC and the empty plate

"How are you still conscious?" He blurted

Confusion flashed across MC'S face. "What do you mean, I/N?"

"You drugged it, didn't you?" Beel spoke up.

"I thought it tasted odd," Beel continued "but I never would have guessed you would actually drug MC. I'm guessing you couldn't handle that MC rejected your advances, so you drugged the food while MC was distracted talking to me. Am I right?"

The incubus chuckled. "Guess I was wrong about you. You are more of a threat than you seem. Heh, I guess you're not just a talking stomach after all."

A loud smack could be heard shortly thereafter.

But the devastating blow didn't come from Beel

It came from an enraged MC

"Trying to drug me I could keep my cool over. If thats all you did I would have just told you to stay the hell away from me. But the SECOND you spoke to Beel like that, you signed your own death warrant."

Before he could react, MC summoned the brothers one by one, Beel explaining the situation.

"Well, MC, perfect timing as always. I was just beginning to get bored" Satan drawled

*screams*

Belphie

It takes a yandere to know one

Belphie doesn't want to alarm MC though, so he decides to outmaneuver the incubus without him noticing

It starts small, with I/N reaching out to put an arm over MC'S shoulder, and Belphie's arm already being there

Eventually, they start glaring daggers at each other the second MC looks away

After a while, Belphie decides to up the ante

Religiously falls asleep on MC when I/N is trying to spend time with him

Goads the incubus so much that he corners Belphie when he snaps and can't take any more

"Listen, I know exactly what you're doing. But if you think that YOU can take him away from me, you're sorely mistaken. MC is mine whether he likes it or not. And if it turns out to be the latter, well, let's just say he won't have much of a choice in the matter, nor will you have any control over it. Got that?"

Belphie does the one thing he knows will get the outcome he had painstakingly built up to the past couple weeks: he laughs

"Ah, you have a good sense of humor, know that? Funny stuff. All kidding aside, MC already belongs to me. So your child's play isn't gonna cut it. Got THAT?"

With a choked cry of fury, the incubus pulls out a knife and stabs Belphie

Belphie, having planned this, falls to the floor just as the door opens to reveal a shocked MC.

"BELPHIE! Shit, please be okay! What the FUCK is wrong with you, I/N?"

The stunned Incubus could only stammer out a couple words

"I- he...was gonna...tried to take what was mine. Tried to take you..."

MC laughed bitterly and shoved him to the floor.

"I don't know what sick world you're living in, but I belong to Belphie. I love him. And I hate YOU. Now I'll leave you be so you can deal with THAT. Ta ta." He says as he scoops up Belphie and heads out the door

"Deal with what?" I/N nervously asks after him, backing up warily

The incubus stops when his back hits something hard.

Gulping, he looks up...

"Hello, I/N, I'm Beel."

"Nice to...meet you? I imagine you're one of the brothers?" He replies shakily

Beel smiles. The light doesn't reach his eyes.

"Yes, I'm one of the brothers. You see, I'm Belphie's twin."

Across the house, Belphie smiles at the faint screams, MC curled up next to him after patching him up.

He succeeded in protecting what was his. He deserves a good nap. Holding MC tighter, he goes back to sleep.

[marimo-o]

ok so im making a long ass post about Abzu (the game) within the context of mesopotamian mythology because I'm insane. It's gonna be a doozy and likely incomprehensible so <3 below the cut it goes! There's gonna be TONS of spoilers for the game, and, like, I guess for the mesopotamian creation epic, so. Play Abzu if you haven't and if you wanna read the Enuma Elish that's also cool. Good for u

(a note from afterwards: it's long. like, REALLY fucking long, holy shit. if you actually want to read the whole thing, be. prepared or something idk take breaks! the last two paragraphs (i know they're walls of text pls bear with me) contain most of the important information. like, the final hurrah of my brain after working on this for multiple hours! So if u wanna save time and avoid some of the redundancy, just skip to those last two <3)

So "Abzu" referred to two things; the fresh water people got from underground aquifers (also as the void-sea which was underneath the Sumerian underworld, Kur), and the deity; he only appeared in the creation story, Enuma Elish, because a big part of that whole thing was that oh no! He dies! And that's also a thing I'm gonna touch on (sorry about the lack of accent marks in advance, it's not available on my current keyboard^ ^;)

I'm gonna start off with a brief tale of what happened with Abzu the deity, and then move onto how both the deity and the concept relate to the game!

So like I mentioned, Abzu the deity only really appears in the creation myth. The story goes that the Primordial Soup divided into two beings, with Abzu representing the freshwater and Tiamat being the saltwater. They were married, and together birthed some of the first formative gods! Some of these gods, jealous of Abzu's power convinced Tiamat to kill him (or, I thought it was started by Tiamat growing resentful of the younger gods, one of those). Either way, Abzu was killed, and Tiamat ended up lashing out, creating the first "dragons", or perhaps becoming one herself; with "poison instead of blood". She is killed by Marduk, the god of storms and the child of Enki (one of the first gods created by Abzu and Tiamat), and from her body the heavens and the earth are formed. Imagine getting killed by ur grandson lol cringe /j

Now! The waters itself! This also brings Enki into the equation, who kinda took over as god of the waters in place of his dead father. He's also the god of creation, intelligence, crafts, mischief, and more! Very important guy.

Abzu refers to both the groundwater reservoirs that people depended on for both accessible clean water and for some agricultural work, and also to the void-sea beneath the underworld, where it is said that Enki rests. He had a temple at Eridu, a now-ruined city, and I remember hearing somewhere that he lived in a temple in an underground aquifer? But I can't find wherever I read that anymore so don't take my word for it. Anyway, the basics of Enki as a deity is: child of Tiamat and Abzu, widely worshipped in his time, god of the waters, generally a cool and important dude.

And now. Finally. We move onto the game. My head hurts.

So, for a quick (post-writing: lol it's not quick) overview of the game; you play as a funny little diver, who woke up in the middle of the ocean and, as the player, are given no clues as to who or what you are. You explore through the ocean levels peacefully at first, and with the guidance of a scarred shark (painted as a bit of an antagonist at first with the audio cues) you make your way to wells at the bottom-center of each level that revitalize the space around them; as they progress, many levels start out as barren, empty landscapes that give you a foreboding, nervous feeling going in, before using an energy from yourself to rekindle the life. Huge coral growths, seaweed, and a myriad of ocean animals spring to life. The player character can also ride on the sides of the bigger ones! The game also puts a big stress on unity between yourself and the environment; there's not a whole lot you can physically interact with, but you can play with the animals there and, like I said before, ride on some of the larger animals. There are also "meditation spots", statues where you can sit and explore the wildlife from more of their point of view, able to follow them seamlessly and see what the different kinds of fish and such are called. It's a calming experience, and really the most interaction you get with some of the more timid animals, letting you still see them up close even if you can't get there as the player character.

The story of the game is told via writings on the walls, which you can light up and access by solving small puzzles regarding connecting reservoirs of glowing waters, similar to that of the almost cosmic area you go to between levels; one thing I read described it as a kind of "rebirth area", which I can definitely see hehe!

At the end of the game, you've held the shark in its dying moments, you've discovered a strange factory that builds the weird triangular prisms that deliver anything that touches them a shock, the little flashlight dudes that you've found over the levels, and little divers that uncannily resemble yourself, and you've seen yourself disassembled to your funny little mechanical skeleton, weak and slow as you try to walk on land, before you are rebirthed from the void-cosmic-water area once again, fully yourself. There's a wonderful ending sequence where you swim through all these rivers, bringing life with you as you go, with the shark once again by your side. The whole game, you saw no land when you poked your head above water, just miles and miles of water, but you've travelled far enough to reach a reservoir. You cut the chains to a central triangular prism, and it grows over with moss. It gives me goosebumps just thinking about it, really, it feels like such a... grand gesture as you play through it. It feels personal.

Okay. Theory time. Finally, we're getting into the meat of it. Fucking hell.

So, imagine that you are this being. You're wandering an oceanic wonderland, observing and caring for what you need to, doing as any good little diver should. After a bit of poking around, you discover the start of the engravings on the walls; they tell the story of the people that were here before you, who built these temples and halls and used, or at least stored, the strange blue glowing "water" that you connect and move. It's a water of life, of sorts, one that they truly valued. You come to an impasse between areas, and this massive, scarred-up shark cuts in front of you. You're gonna stay hidden, that thing is terrifying! You try not to move. It doesn't spot you, or at least doesn't move to attack you. However, once it's safely out of view, you do follow it, and it leads you to a dark, desolate, empty chamber. This is wrong, you think to yourself. This isn't how it should be. There's a well, towards the bottom, and you approach it, taking... a fragment of light, from your chest, and imbuing that spark of life into the well. And, lo and behold, that intuition proved helpful, because the world around you springs back to life. Congratulations! You did it! And you continue to, as you work past puzzles and challenges and the appearance of these strange triangular mechanisms, that shock you when you get too close. These people worshipped a shark, as well, likely the same as the one you saw; the guide, now old and scarred, that brings you to where that spark is needed. Even later in the game, you see depictions of the triangular mechanisms, at first heralded as a positive, before these things are found to be the reason for this society's collapse. As if that wasn't perplexing enough, you see a depiction of a being that appears suspiciously similar to yourself, once again treated with reverence from the past civilization. In their hand is a ball of light, similar to the one shown when you revitalize the oceanic chambers. Well, that's certainly odd, you think to yourself. Perhaps this was a being that postponed the death of the civilization, or first allowed for those small chambers of life to exist in captivity instead of the open, natural landscapes you explored at the start. Regardless, it's now a relic of something long gone; but it still gives you something to think about. Later on, that strange coincidence of your similarities to that person are explained; you find a manufacturing plant, full of the vicious triangular mechanisms in each tight hallway, and right at the center of it all... multiple iterations of yourself, running down an assembly line, a spark not unlike what you saw before imbued into each of them. My, look at that; you've been responsible for part of this destruction all along, haven't you? Borne from that same ill that has been forcibly removing that spark from each of the places you've gone to. A bit inconsiderate of you, no? And yet... look at all the good you've done. You've rebirthed, revitalized, purified these ocean fragments, is that not enough? You are the keeper of these waters, regardless of the evil you had come from, despite the terrifying empty things may have reverted to. You, who trusted and followed the shark that seemed so scary at first. You, who followed it as it tried to attack a source of the evil, of the thing that was draining the oceans of their life. You, who held and comforted that shark as it lay dying, despite any fear you may have had. You, who attempted to traverse a minefield of those triangular machines, shocked over and over again and at the final moment, unable to make it to the finish line. You, who was rebirthed in full regardless by the oceans you'd cared for, by the void-sea you always returned to, to rest. You, who traversed a now-ruined citadel, temple, all of which had been flooded and had been dedicated to you. You, who brought life with you.

I hope you see what I'm getting at here. You're serving as a figure not unlike Enki, god and guardian of the waters. In the wake of Abzu, the avatar of the fresh waters, now confined to irrigation canals so as not to kill the younger gods, Tiamat lashes out. Her husband is dead, as far as she is concerned, and she goes to those younger gods to seek her revenge. The dragon, that which sucked the life from the seas and poisoned the waters. That which Marduk killed, to carve new life from. I would say that the shark is Marduk, even; given how the shark is the only one who is openly on the offense to those mechanisms, and who comes in at the endgame to finish them off, bringing new life with it. Even in how it all shapes up with the civilization before, in connection to the constructs; Tiamat was the mother of all in existence at that time. She was surely loved; but she turned hostile and violent. She could no longer be safely loved. And Abzu, both the glowing water we use to open doors and the light that we hold and the deep void-sea we enter between levels and father to all in existence, he was confined to small canals and reservoirs and put in a deep sleep so that he would not kill his own children. And by you, no less. Enki put him there. That is why you can use that water from the start; you lived in the Abzu, you came from it, and each time, that is where you return. That temple, now submerged and decrepit, is Eridu; the place where Enki was most worshipped. The other diver clones are the other gods, or perhaps the "dragons", now, that Tiamat had mothered. The smaller prisms definitely count in that "dragon" category; purely harmful beings that seek to destroy life. And in the end, indeed, you restore life; you and your son, upon killing Tiamat, return life to the world from her body. Perhaps you could not save those who once worshipped you, perhaps those structures will forever be in ruin. But there is no more danger, now; there is space to build and replenish. There is space to grow.

Fuck ok that was long as hell. Hi if u made it this far i love u. god fucking damn im never writing anything again after this. it took about as long as a full playthrough of the game, coincidentally!!

[sour-n-salty-citrus]

Do you have any hopes for the season finale? I saw in another ask, you described the dynamic between rick and morty this season as "very weak, distant, and downright frankly boring" and I completely agree with you! I hope that, because this is most we'll see rick and morty interacting this season, it'll have at least a few moments of what makes their dynamic so interesting to watch.

(Ok i started airing my grievances with this season, which ended up being... long, so skip this paragraph (starting at / / /) to get to my thoughts on the finale)

Oh gosh I remember that ask (I think-). And yeah, maybe I'm being a bit overly critical. I'll probably look back on this season with retrospect, and a kinder, fonder view. Ik androgynousblackbox (think thats right) made a great point about it being the season FOR rickorty shippers. And sure, I agree on some bits, like Rick acting all pissy and partying the way you would if your ex got with someone new in the planetina ep. Overall though, i think my problem lies in that I was enjoying more individual moments than episodes themselves, especially the middle three. For example- Amortycan Grickfitti. Like, I really liked the idea of the Ship getting on a crazy adventure with Summer and Morty (and Chutback). I like the idea of a Beth-Jerry-Rick adventure. But put together, it's just kinda... meh? You know? I liked the first half of the Thanksgiving special... but it kinda dragged on after that. I get that they want to give other characters (particularly female ones) more attention, which is completely understandable and i encourage it(!) but I can't help but find it underwhelming. Like, Summer in the voltron ep was like- girl how are you STILL vying for Rick's attention! He's the worst! Haven't we done this already? (I will say though I ADORE how far Beth has come, props to her for continuing to seeing through her dad's BS. I was worried the character would relapse into a more typical s1/s2 Beth, and I'm glad she didn't). Some of these plots, funnily enough, seem more fitting of the comics (they actually had a voltron parody already). Fun and entertaining for two or three-something issues, not so much a 22 minute episode. i think most of my complaints come from the dynamic between our titular characters- ok, I know I'm very biased (I mean you can see it), but I came to the show primarily for their relationship. It doesn't even feel drama-fueled, just that they kinda... can't be arsed. I'm torn because on the one hand, they're unhealthily codependent and this separation is probably a good thing, but on the other... it doesn't feel natural? I'm not sure if that's the right word- it's like, season 4 had them practically joint at the hip, but all that's suddenly flung out the window. It just kinda feels like this "i got better things to do" vibe from both of them and its strange. The only time they both got a solo adventure (I'm classifying "solo" as an adventure where they spent a significantly large portion of time together, without the other family members) was in the sperm ep and Thanksgiving ep. And, well, in the Thanksgiving ep Morty felt like a side character in his own show, and the sperm ep... um. Yeah. I don't think it's AS bad as people were saying, but I was cringing the whole time (the second hand embarrassment for Morty was so strong I had to turn off the episode multiple times and return to it. It's just like- godammit MORTY). And I think there's good reason those two seemed to be the most disliked episodes overall. They're the ones RaM spend the most time together and it's... meh. Meh? Meh. I don't mean to say the season overall is bad (it has loads of good points, and its amazing for Smith family as a whole) just that if we're talking specifically about the dynamic between these two? Yeah, I wouldn't recommend a single episode from this season so far to use as an example of their relationship.

/ / /

There's one thing this season has been pretty good at, though. And it's showing us what happens when Rick is alone.

And that brings me to the finale.

"Who is Rick without Morty?"

Well... we already know the answer to that. Pathetic. Sad. Lonely.

This season has been phenomenal in humbling Rick. (And trust me I'm happy for it- every time someone beats the crap outta this shitty old man I'm like YES!!! IT'S WHAT HE DESERVES!). Ep 1 had his "nemesis" clearly besting him, ep 2 had Beth making constant digs (love her) and overall pointing out his extreme callousness and cruelty towards even himself(ves). Ep 3- when Morty shows interest in a girl and ditches him (like seriously it's not like he's moving out, chill) he immediately goes on a bender and develops a deep attachment to the first person he can (wearing yellow, funnily enough). Ep 4, he devotes himself to becoming an "honest man" for his new child, only for it to instantly be taken away from him. Ep 5 highlights how RICK is the asshole for making fun of and taking advantage of someone well-meaning and honest, if "simple", and how literally not cool that is. Ep 6 has his crazy rivalry with the president, and they both get smacked down a couple pegs for that. Ep 7 shows what happens when he allows himself to get carried away, and that he can end up driving everyone else away in the process (lucky they still wanted to save his ass when he needed them). And episode 8? Hooooo boy. Episode. 8. We see a direct parallel in Birdperson with Morty, and the whole "Rick and [insert] 100 years!" Rick has few people he cares about, arguably only one or two that he truly devotes himself to, but when he does, boy does he go HARD. We see younger Rick, optimistic, energetic, friendly and hopeful. And we see all of that crushed in minutes. Rick is desperate for a companion, someone to see the stars with. He needs someone there, someone he can trust and rely on to stay. Someone like Morty. So without Morty, who is Rick?

No one.

And the thing is, Morty doesn't need Rick anymore. Not like Rick needs him. In season 1, Morty was this bright-eyed kid who was new to the cosmos and the multiverse, who needed his grandpa there with him as they explored all these places together. But that's not him anymore. That's not them.

The promo has Morty using the portal gun to go somewhere w/o Rick's permission (i like to think it's boob world lol). It doesn't matter to me as much where he's going, as much as he's doing it alone. He doesn't just not need Rick there, he doesn't want him.

(Also correct me if im wrong but I've missed that sweet portal gun so much. I think the last ep was like- the first time this season we saw it).

Morty's response to Rick? "Replace me!". And wow. Wow. WOW. Morty doesn't give a FUCK! I think Rick thinks that because he's so smart, that he can offer so much, that Morty will come crawling back, and I don't think he will.

Hopes for the finale! Hmm. I mean, I definitely hope "evil" Morty makes a reappearance, haha. I think we all do tbh ;). I want to see some Morty development too, this season has been very Rick-centric (not that there's anything wrong with that!) so I wanna see what's in store for Our Boy. I really hope we get to see the Citadel again, and see the state it's in, but I doubt it. We know something super big is in store, it's just a question of what? Other hopes I have is some Summer + Beth action (please let them team up Im BEGGING) and Jerry too ahaha. I'd love if some other side characters made an appearance as well. Oh- I'm definitely expecting a dramatic cliffhanger at the end of the first half leading to the second half, with the kind of angsty music that leads into the credits (pls that shit is so good (OH WAIT imagine if it was like, for the damaged coda, but like- the chopin version or smth so it could be more subtle maybe bruhhhh)). Ok haha, maybe that's asking too much, the writers made it clear in the story train ep that they weren't gonna do that big dramatic showdown (... unless 👀). Oh, I'd also love some Premium Angst too, like someone getting kidnapped/nearly dying (like ACTUALLY nearly dying). These stakes better be so damn high I could spear a man on them! OH, also I remember androgynousblackbox (is that right? I hope it is) mentioned something along the lines that they could be driving Rick and Morty apart this season in order to have them come back together stronger than ever in an explosive finale, which, I'm strongly hoping for myself.

Thanks if you made it this far! If you have any thoughts on or hopes of your own for the finale please feel free to share! :D

[lindzem]

BLACK CAT

Jack laughed as he strode down the sidewalk with his sister Emma. They'd had a normal day of school and the chilly october breeze whirled leaves all around. Emma giggled as she bounced into a pile of leaves playfully before jogging back next to her brother.

Jack pulled out his wallet and hummed.

"Ready for some pumpkin ice cream to celebrate you getting an A on your math test?"

Emma twirled and bounced.

"Yes yes yes! Its pumpkin season! Woohoo!"

Jack smiled as he kept walking with her until they both heard a piercing screech from a nearby alleyway. Emma hid behind her brother instinctively with a frown.

"What was that...?"

Jack frowned and paused also.

"The heck...? Hey, stay here. I'll check it out."

"Be careful, Jack..."

The brown haired boy cautiously walked over to the alley entrance. The closer he got to the commotion the worse he heard. A sniggering voice babbled while a few others laughed.

"Let's glue its tail to its back!"

Another voice chimed.

"No, let's pour the glue in its ears!"

Jack rushed forwards to see three male teens a few years older than him had trapped a black cat in a broken cage. They were harrassing it terribly and one of the boys had a bottle of super glue in his hand. Jack couldn't bear what was about to happen.

He yelled and rushed forwards, slamming into the kid with the glue and it crashed onto the ground.

"Leave the cat alone, you assholes!"

Flustered, all the teens watched as Jack threw himself between them.

"The hell?! Go away if you know what's good for you, punk!"

"It's just a stupid cat! Mind your own business!"

Jack growled angrily.

"Leave it alone!"

The tallest teen hissed.

"Get him!"

Jack's eyes widened and he turned around to shield the cat with his body as all the bullies began to wail on him. Jack took the blows and winced, cringing with every kick and punch until they got bored. They left and Jack slowly sat up. His body ached and stung all over. But the cat was alright. That was what mattered.

"H-Hey...its ok little fella...they're gone. Here, lemme get you out of there."

Slowly but surely Jack pried some of the cage wiring back enough for the cat to yank out of it. The feline rushed a few feet away but turned around and stared back at him confused. After a minute it ran away and Jack sighed. He stood and walked back out to Emma.

"Hey, sorry to keep you waiting."

Emma hugged him and he yelped.

"What happened?!"

"Oh, just had to save a cat from these jerks. You know, cool hero stuff~ Now let's go get you some ice cream!"

Emma nodded and they walked off to the ice cream shop.

The next morning Jack awoke much sorer and groaned. He tried to sit up until he saw something at the end of his bed. He rubbed his eyes and blinked. It was the same black cat he saved yesterday. He startled and jerked back, hitting his head on his bedboard. He squeaked and held it.

"Ow! Fuck-!"

The cat merely watched him curiously and calmly, swishing its tail. Jack saw it had such bright gold eyes that stared deeply and intently, but they meant no harm.

"What are you doing here? How did you even get inside my house?"

The cat stayed silent and still. Jack blinked and groaned.

"Alright you gotta go. Come on."

He slowly got out of bed and reached for the cat, but it jumped away from him onto the floor with a chirp. Emma came through the door and gasped when she saw the cat.

"Jack lets go, we're gonna be late for the movie--! Is that the cat?! It's so cuuute!!!"

Surprisingly the cat seemed content with Emma picking it up and hugging it.

"Yeah, but its gotta go. And so do we. Come on then."

He gets dressed and goes with her downstairs to the front door. They walk out and stroll down the sidewalk into town. Suddenly the cat begins to squirm and meow. Emma frowned.

"Huh, whats wrong kitty?"

It jumps down from her arms and meows at them loudly. It rushes forwards and turns around constantly to see if they are following.

"It wants us to follow it!"

Jack shrugged.

"Emma if we go that way, we'll be late for the movie."

She pouted and looked back at him.

"No we wont, come on!"

Jack sighed and followed along. The cat leads them down to the end of the block and stops in front of a black oranate metal doorway with golden painted etchings all over. The cat pushed the door open and ran inside. Emma giggled and followed.

"Wait kitty!"

Jack looked more concerned now, not wanting his sister to rush into someplace dangerous.

"Emma, wait, stop!"

He went in after her and slowed down, seeing all sorts of whacky looking artifacts and trinkets everywhere. The place was only illuminated by candles and everything was mostly the colors of black and gold. Jack was relieved to see Emma staring into an beautiful crystal ball on top of a round table in the middle of the room.

"This place is so cool, Jack!"

Jack walked over to her and kept eyeing around the room.

"Uh, yeah, but it's also a bit creepy. Never too early for Halloween I guess. Where's the cat?"

"I dunno. I lost it. Maybe it lives here! We brought it back home, yay!"

Jack gently nudged her.

"Alright, now lets get back to the movie, huh?"

Emma sighed.

"Aww but I like this place!"

Just that moment a tall man stepped out from behind a drapery of black velvet curtains. Jack gasped and instinctively stepped in front of his sister to protect her if need be. The man was lithe and draped in a gorgeous black silk robe with delicate golden lace all over the neck and arms. He also wore a sparkling golden feathery boa around his neck. His hair was ebony black and his eyes glinted gold in the candle light.

"Good afternoon, children~ How may I be of service?"

Jack felt oddly uneasy about this man and forced a smile.

"O-Oh no, we're sorry to intrude. We were just leaving, really--"

The man tisked his tongue and chuckled.

"It's no bother at all~ Im always happy to have guests. My name is Pitch and I am a fortune teller by trade."

Emma gasped and squealed.

"Really?! Jack, let's get our fortunes told! Pleeeease!"

Jack eyed her.

"But I thought you wanted to see the Perfect Princess Ponypal movie?"

"We can see it next week! Please please please!"

Jack sighed and smiled a little. He couldn't say no to her.

"Ok ok, we can. How much is it?"

Pitch smiled and motioned to the table.

"For you two, I'll make it free. Come, sit."

Pitch sat across the table from Emma and Jack. Jack sat and watched as the man sprinkled some golden powder over the crystal ball. It began to swirl around in various colors.

"Now then. Who's fortune shall we tell?"

Emma piped up.

"Jack's!"

Jack rolled his eyes and laughed a little. Pitch nodded with a smile.

"Very well~ Now let's see. Your aura is a beautiful snowy white, my boy. How interesting indeed."

Jack watched Pitch carress the crystal ball with his finger tips and the coloring inside turned all sparkling white.

"Woah, that's cool. What does it mean?"

"You put on a tough exterior show, but deep down you are as soft as the first snowfall in winter."

Jack flustered a tad.

"Eheh, yeah ok. Sure."

Pitch smiled and eyed the young teen curiously.

"I'd like to read your palms, if you'll allow."

"Uh, sure."

Jack held out his right hand. Pitch gently took it im his own and began to trace some lines softly.

"Very interesting. You're going to live a very long fulfilling life it seems. You have untold strength and destiny awaiting you."

Jack laughed a little, not believing it because fortune tellers were always just cheap parlor tricks and observation.

"Wow. Who knew."

Pitch smiled and looked directly at him.

"Give me that ring on your necklace."

Jack's blood froze. It was a gift from his departed mother. He hesitated.

"I...uhm...ok."

He slowly took it off and handed it over. Pitch accepted it and gazed for a minute quietly.

"Fascinating..."

Jack eyed him oddly.

"What?"

"This ring is a treasured memory of yours. From your mother, yes?"

Jack felt a lump in his throat and uneasyness in his stomach. How could he have possibly known that? Unless he'd been spying on them somehow. Was it something to do with that cat? No, that's crazy...

Jack held his hand out urgently, not comfortable being there anymore.

"Uh, thanks, but I just remembered we have things we need to do at home."

Jack took back the ring and stood, grabbing Emma's arm and tugging. She groaned in upset and confusion.

"Jaaack, no we dont-!"

He interrupted her sharply.

"Yes, we really do. Come on, we need to go now."

Pitch stood and eyed Jack with his own sense of unease.

"Jack, please, I didn't mean any harm."

Jack didn't answer. He knew this felt like a bad idea. Just as Jack got to the door, it suddenly locked itself. Jack's eyes widened in fear as he grabbed and yanked at the handle.

"W-What the hell-?! Unlock this door right--"

Jack whirled around, but Pitch was right behind him. It was a split second before Jack felt Pitch's hand on his head. Instantly Jack slipped into a deep sleep.

When the boy awoke he realized he was still in Pitch's home. He jerked up and looked around frantically. Why did he feel so cold? He jumped up off the bed and paused. Why wasn't he feeling sore from his injuries? In fact, he felt better than ever before, like a new energy was flowing through him.

No, he needed to find his sister. Who knows what awful things that creep could have done to her. He rushed out from the small bedroom area and down the stairs into what appeared to be the kitchen. He saw Pitch cooking some eggs and growled.

"Where is Emma?! What did you do to her, you sick bastard!?"

Pitch blinked and glanced over his shoulder.

"Oh good, you're awake! Now we can get start--"

Jack lunged and slammed into Pitch, shoving him down to the ground. The teen grasped his hands around Pitch's neck and began to choke him with a strength he never knew he had. Pitch tried to pull the boy's hands off, but he wasn't as strong.

"What did you to her?!"

Pitch rasped out.

"Sh..She's f-fine!!! Home, a-at your ho--me!"

Jack began to see frost and ice crystalize its way around Pitch's neck and face as he choked him. He suddenly let him go and backed away in fear.

"W-What the hell-!? What was that?!"

Pitch coughed and gasped for air, clutching his neck. He wheezed and eyed the teen cautiously as he rasped.

"Look...L-Look..."

Jack seemed confused until Pitch pointed frantically at a huge wall length mirror nearby. Jack glanced up and then did a double take with horrified eyes. He slowly walked over in mortified shock. His eyes were blue now and his hair was white as snow, instead of both being his normal brown.

"What did you do to me-!? I--I--! Where's Emma--the stupid fucking cat-?!"

Pitch stood up and slowly approached.

"Jack, I am the cat. Im just repaying you for saving me in the alleyway."

[manage-mischief]

Regulus Black and The Darkest Shadows: Chapter 4

Read on AO3 or FF.net

A/N: CHAPTER TRIGGER WARNING: MENTIONS OF PAST ALCOHOL ABUSE! END OF CHAPTER! I really enjoyed writing this chapter! Hope you all like it! Thanks so much for the kind reviews, and thank you to my amazing beta @leah-ravenanne !

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Chapter 4: Misery Loves Company

September 13th, 1978

The next morning, Regulus left the Slytherin dorms early to avoid any undesired interactions. He made his way to the Great Hall to find McDrew. When Regulus arrived, he scanned the long house tables for a sign of the beefy Quidditch Captain.

Regulus finally spotted McDrew sitting halfway down the Slytherin Table with a couple of other students. McDrew noticed him staring.

“Oi, Black! C’mon, I’ve saved you a seat!” He gave a great wave and a large, goofy grin. Regulus sat down awkwardly.

“Here, Reg, let me introduce you to some of my friends. They’re not all Slytherins, but, then again, not everyone can be so lucky.” he laughed, cheekily.

“Can it, Woody!” The dark, curly-haired girl sitting across from him rolled her eyes. She glanced at Regulus warily. Regulus had a feeling that McDrew had instructed his friends to be nice.

“I’m Wilhelmina Young. Hufflepuff,” she introduced herself hesitantly.

“Oh yeah. You’re in my year,” said Regulus. “We had Care of Magical Creatures together.”

Wilhelmina nodded, warming up a bit. “I didn’t know if you’d remember. We were partners when we had to take care of that nasty Flobberworm in 3rd year.”

Regulus cringed at the memory.

“And you know Marlene McKinnon, I’m sure. She’s a Gryffindor.” McDrew continued the introductions, gesturing to the pretty blonde girl on his right.

Marlene narrowed her eyes. Regulus gulped. He was quite aware of Marlene’s feelings towards him. “Yeah, we’ve met,” said Marlene. “Although, I’m more familiar with your brother. He and I were…close…for a bit.” Marlene grinned while the rest of the crew cracked up. Regulus didn’t know how to respond to that. Sirius had been quite...active...before he’d realized his true affections for fellow Gryffindor Remus Lupin. Regulus wondered if they were still together.  

Marlene stared at him once again, sizing him up. “Well, I guess you’re alright. As long as you don’t go around preaching about the ‘Noble and Most Ancient House of Wankers’, we’ll get along fine.”

The girl sitting next to her chuckled and kissed her cheek. Regulus recognized her as fellow Slytherin Dorcas Meadowes. “Wotcher.” Dorcas nodded in greeting. “Sorry, ‘bout my girlfriend. She doesn’t know when to shut her mouth.”

Marlene playfully shoved her back and exclaimed, “You weren’t complaining about that at Madame Puddifoot’s last week!” The table erupted in laughter again, and Regulus joined them. He was shocked by how easily Marlene and the others had accepted him. Maybe things were looking up. Maybe, this whole turning his life around thing wouldn’t be so hard.

Just then, Regulus saw Woodrow wave towards the Great Hall Entrance. “Ah, here they are, late as always.”

Regulus looked over his shoulder to see who had arrived. His heart dropped. Three Ravenclaws were walking towards them. Two boys—one of whom Regulus recognized as George Fleet, the other he didn’t know—and one girl. A tall, brown-haired girl with clear plastic glasses and a fiery expression plastered on her face. Desdemona.

The three newcomers sat. Desdemona glared.

“Oi, Woody.  I thought you were joking when you said Black’d be joining us,” Desdemona said, pretending as if Regulus wasn’t there.

McDrew shot Regulus an apologetic look. “Des, c’mon. He wants to change. We’re gonna help him!”

Desdemona huffed. “‘Wants to change,’ my arse! You know what his lot did just a few days ago? That little girlfriend of his hexed Broderick in the middle of the hallway for no bloody reason! Called ‘im a Mudblood!” She gestured to the boy sitting next to her, who suddenly became very interested in his bowl of porridge. Broderick was clearly not in the mood for confrontation, or for Desdemona’s angry tirade.

Regulus quickly defended himself. “I didn’t know anything about that! And, anyways, you turned Ginger’s hair green. You got her back.”

Desdemona pounded her fist on the table, causing silverware to fly into the air. “OH RIGHT! BRODERICK HAD TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL WING! But, my, my, I’m so sorry poor little miss Death Eater Queen had to suffer with green hair for a few hours. Poor baby!”

People around them had begun to stare. McDrew put a hand on the tall girl’s shoulder. “Listen, if Reg says he wasn’t involved, he wasn’t involved. I believe him. And you more than anyone should respect the fact that he’s trying to turn over a new leaf. As long as that’s the case, we’re going to help him do it. Understand?”

She looked like she wanted to retort, but thought better of it. She nodded, frowning, and muttered under her breath, “Fine.” Desdemona glared at McDrew, but didn’t argue. Instead, she turned to Wilhelmina. “Can you pass the toast?”

The group of friends let out a collective breath of relief. Regulus got the feeling that McDrew was the leader of this little gang. At any rate, anyone who could convince Desdemona Lewis to tolerate Regulus was impressive.

---

After the meal ended, Regulus, Broderick, Desdemona, and Wilhelmina headed down to the dungeons for Potions. The atmosphere was still tense and a bit awkward.

“So,” Regulus said, trying to break the tension, “What d’you think Slughorn’ll have us make today?”

“I don’t like you, Black,” Desdemona snapped, not even looking at him.

“You don’t like anyone, Des,” Wilhelmina replied casually. Broderick laughed. Desdemona pouted.

“I just have high standards, that’s all,” she said haughtily.

“High standards? Is that what they’re calling ‘being a judgmental bitch’ nowadays?” Wilelmina teased back.

Regulus cracked a smile, but his amusement seemed to really set Desdemona off. Broderick stepped in front of her to try and hold her back. “Des,” he said in a soothing, deep voice. “Remember what Woodrow said? We’re trying to help Regulus. He doesn’t want to be like the rest of those Death Eaters anymore. He wants to change. Remember, Woodrow told us. We have to be empathetic. We have to understand.”

“Understand? I understand! I understand that his little cult wants to eradicate Muggle culture! They don’t think people like you and me deserve to be at Hogwarts, because my mum’s a Muggle, or because I can’t prove my dad was a wizard, or because I was raised by Muggles or whatever! And I’m supposed to just accept that he’s changed? I may be judgmental and choosy about who I trust, but it’s for good reason! Because if we put our trust in the wrong person, we could end up dead!”

Desdemona stormed off ahead of them, leaving Regulus feeling as awful as ever. Despite his dislike of Desdemona’s unpleasant attitude towards him, she was completely justified. She had every right to hate Regulus. Was he being an idiot? Was it really possible for him to cut ties with his past, when his past involved such hurt and pain?

Broderick patted him on the back. “Hey, mate. I’m Muggleborn, and I still have faith you can change. If we don’t allow people from You-Know-Who’s side to change their minds and join us, we’ll never win the war. It’s just Des. You know, she’s got quite a temper and, between you and me, a ton of anxiety. She’ll come around, though. And I can tell, you’re not as off-your-rocker as that Ginger chick.”  

Regulus was shocked at how kind of a person Broderick was—how kind all of McDrew’s friends were. Here Regulus was, asking them to accept him despite the awful people he’d aligned himself with, despite the awful things he had done. And they were willing to give him a second chance he knew he didn’t remotely deserve.

Regulus forced a small smile, still considering how he was ever going to fit in with this new group.

---

Despite a rocky start, Regulus’s attempts to gain new friends had been growing more and more successful with each passing day. By the end of the week, Regulus had taken to studying in the library with Broderick during their free periods, had accompanied Woodrow and Marlene on an adventure to visit the House Elves in the Kitchens, and had even managed to have a thirty second conversation with Desdemona that had not ended in screaming or cursing.

By Friday night, Regulus whistled happily in his dorm while he put gel in his hair before the year’s first Slug Club dinner. He had felt freer and happier than he had in a long time.

As Regulus strolled towards Slughorn’s office, he heard a strange whimpering. Curious, he followed the noises down an unfamiliar corridor, where he discovered their source—Desdemona. She was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall, quietly crying. She was dressed up for Slughorn’s party, in a midnight blue dress and silver shoes. However, her makeup was running down her face, ruining the aesthetic. Her fingers were tapping noticeably at her side. Regulus was about to back away from the scene when she looked up and noticed him watching. Her eyes narrowed dangerously.

“What the bloody hell are you looking at?”

“Um, I was just…going…I’ll leave you to it,” Regulus sputtered. He felt a pang of regret in his chest. Sure, he and Desdemona mixed about as well as oil and water. Sure, they had been hellbent on outcompeting and insulting each other for six years now. However, in the moment, she seemed vulnerable. He sighed, sure he would regret his next decision. But, he was trying to turn over a new leaf. And that included rectifying his past mistakes. Maybe, this could be a start.

Slowly, he approached her and slid down the wall, taking a seat onto the cool stone floor beside her. He awkwardly patted her shoulder. “Er…everything ok?” He winced at his tactlessness. Clearly everything was not okay.

For a moment, Regulus thought Des was going to snap at him. Then, her face melted and she took a deep breath. “Do you really want to know?” She asked, leaning her head back against the wall and staring up at the ceiling. She tapped her fingers together more rapidly. Regulus didn’t quite know how to respond, so he simply nodded his head, inviting her to continue.

“My mum. She…ah…she died.”

Regulus’s heart sank for her. He was at a loss for words. What was he supposed to say to comfort the girl? “Oh. Sorry,” was all he could muster.

She shook her head and laughed emptily. “No. I shouldn’t be shocked. In fact, it’s a surprise it took her this long.”

“Was she sick?” Regulus asked.

“In a way.” Des furrowed her brow, as if considering whether to divulge any more private information. “I guess I can tell you. Since I’ve been ordered to be your ‘friend’ now.”

“I’ll ignore the sarcasm,” Regulus quipped, hoping to put her more at ease.

“What a shame,” she replied. After a brief pause, she continued: “My aunt always says it’s best to share your thoughts and emotions. ‘Don’t let yourself be controlled by them.’ I tell her that’s bullshit. If people knew half the things that went on inside my head…”

She paused, stopping herself. “Well, anyways,” said Desdemona, returning to the story. “My mum kind of…lost it…when my dad died. She had run away to the States to be with him. Given up everything. The family hardly approved, but she was head over heels. Hippies, the pair of them. Hence the name,” she gestured to herself.

Regulus chuckled. “Oh right. Desdemona Rain.”

“Awful, isn’t it? Anyways, dad died—I don’t know how, none of my family does. Mum wouldn’t tell them. After that, she brought me back to England. She started drinking. A lot. And then, one day, she left me with my aunt and uncle while she went to the store, and she never came back. I hadn’t heard from her in over ten years. Last my aunt had known, she was in some sort of rehab center up north. She…she didn’t want to see any of us…she didn’t want me to visit…” Desdemona took another deep breath. “The center…they—they called Aunt Eliza yesterday and said she had been released, then relapsed and OD’ed. I just found out.”

Regulus watched her as she attempted to steady her shaky breath. “I’m sorry. Do you…do you want me to walk you back to your dorm or something?”

“No, no,” she said, “Please don’t be nice to me. It makes me feel pathetic when you’re nice to me.”

Regulus laughed lightly.

“And besides,” she continued, wiping the makeup from under her eyes and smoothing her dress, “I can’t very well go back knowing that you’ll be hogging the time of whatever influential person Slughorn has brought for us this evening! Git.” Pulling out a small pocket mirror, she examined her reflection and dabbed away the remaining black streaks on her cheeks.

Regulus stood and hesitantly offered a hand to Desdemona. To his surprise, she took it and pulled herself up. Regulus awkwardly dropped her hand and spoke. “I’m sorry, Desdemona. Truly. I know that the things I’ve said and the people I’ve associated with in the past have hurt you. I don’t know what to say besides I’m sorry. I like to tell myself that I never really believed those things, that I was trying to fit in and make my family proud. But, I didn’t try to stop it. And any pain I’ve caused you—directly or indirectly…You don’t deserve to be bullied or put down because of who your parents were or how you were raised. But if it makes you feel any better, I’ll say this: you’re an amazing witch. Probably better than any of the rest of us.”

“Wow. Can I get that in writing?” She joked. Then, seriously, she said, “Please, call me Des. I think I can allow it, seeing as you’ve unlocked a piece of my tragic backstory. I expect you to return the favor someday.”

“Come on, we’re already running late. Let’s go…Des.”

[karasflowers]

the worst one of these you guys are ever gonna see :)

Name: mark...... something lol

Date of birth: oh you know ;)))))))

Date of death: something something 2019

Age when they died: oh god oh fuck not like. an old man. but also not too young ya feel? dont wanna make things weird. old enough to be independent in life (lived alone n such). young enough to not be cringe.

Cause of death: carefully planned sewer side by hung

Are they in Button House, or a different location? button house accidentally oops

(If they live at Button House) What are their thoughts on the ghosts there?

Pat: you are my dad. youre my dad! boogie woogie woogie. i love you bro you are so fucking epic.

Thomas: cautious 'friends'. would attack at any moment. thinks hes funnee but is mad as hell at him.

Fanny: hahaaaaaa no.

The Captain: I LOVE....... YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the only motherfucker in this house whos allowed to call him markus. if not already dead would die for him all over again. dear captain: how do i love thee? let me count the ways. one one thousand two one thousand three one thousand f

Kitty: thinks everyone else is too mean to her. the only motherfucker in the house who truly appreciates her 😤

Robin: they dont really interact a lot but he doesnt mind him

Mary: likes the way she talks and like alison is wanting and willing to help her learn stuff like cards n such

Julian: AY YO FUCK THIS GUY.

Humphrey: im rewriting this whole one fuck you. hell yeah humphrey love that guy. will (almost) always try to help reconnect his head to his body. bro we are bros.

The Plague Ghosts: weird him out but he tries not to show it. is as nice as he can be to a basement full of fucked up dead people.

Jemima (the little girl): best friend. thinks shes really cool (because she is). i love you you funky little apparition.

Do they have any special ghost powers? floatin n flyin is all i crave 😏

If they could be seen by a living human, what would their response be? hey bro can you help me make a post on tumblr dot com i wanna scare all my followers

What do they look like? you should already know this by now but lol

Which of the Friends would they insist they were? CHANDLER IS THE ONLY ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION

Other Headcanons: he sleeps wherever he wants but usually in mid air just to flex on everyone else. he misses food so fucking bad he just stares at it endlessly and phases his head through it to pretend hes eating it. is sometimes completely unintelligible. chases ghigeon around the house to try and eat it. purple skin is from choking to death ok fuck you.

[willgayers]

reddie at a fuckinn,,, office christmas party and eddie is like 'oh finally my chance to talk to the cute guy (richie) that works in HR' but then richie walks in and he's wearing the UGLIEST fucking christmas sweater ever and eddie loses his shit ((idk this just came to mind do what u want with it)) ((((this is kinghanscom ily)))

@kinghanscom MY ACTUAL GOD ,,, I WORSHIP ,, LOVE, AND ADORE YOU

theyre like ,, 25-26 here

office christmas parties… oh god

first of all they’ve been seeing each other in work the whole year, never really talked 

they were in the break room at the same time a couple of times but they never really got far with talking

as richie was always busy being the jester of the break room 

but one time he winked at eddie before he turned his gaze away to talk to somebody else again 

and eddie rushed away with a blush

and his donut

well yeah,,, back to the christmas party:

“hey greta” eddie smiles at the old info counter lady as he walks in 

“hello eddie,,, here take this”

she gives him the “hi my name is” sticker

eddie writes “Eddie” on it and sticks it to his baby blue button-up 

he grabs a glass of the “champagne” on the tray but its probably some cheap apple cider just put in a fancy glass

eddie sips it and cringes

yep he was right

soon he turns his gaze to the left side of the hall, where laughter is coming from

who else but richie tozier is in there,,, entertaining as usual

eddie bites on his lip because tonight would be a great opportunity to finally talk to the cute scrawny guy 

like eddie had no idea if he was gay or anything (at least not according to the awful shoes he wore) but he HAD winked at eddie so??? 

suddenly everyone starts to disappear from around richie,,, to get more drinks or smoke cigars or something

richie gets left alone,, and eddie notices how he pulls his smartphone out from his pocket and starts to scroll on it

now is your chance kaspbrak

eddie gulps the cheap apple cider down in one take and leaves the now empty glass on the table before making his way to richie 

he inhales and exhales once more,,, before he steps forwards

“hey” eddie says

richie turns around, not expecting to see who he did but now a huge smirk takes over his face

“hey!!! its you”

eddie’s gaze slides down to the shirt richie is wearing

its,,, a ,,fucking shirt,,, with a dabbing santa claus riding a grumpy cat reindeer 

“what the FUCK is that” eddie asks, nodding towards his shirt, his gaze still stuck on it 

richie glances down at his shirt again

“its a shirt with a dabbing santa claus riding a grumpy cat reindeer” he says

“oh my fucking god” eddie facepalms

“what???” richie asks “you dont think its cool???”

“NO i dont think its cool i think its a fucking disaster”

“excuse me i paid good money for this” richie jokes

“wasted money i say” eddie says, and now regrets drinking his apple cider down in one go 

he notices an abandoned glass on the table next to him tho so he leans to grab it 

“whats your name, flower of positivity?” richie asks

eddie looks at him for a moment, wondering whether this was a bad freaking idea 

but then he remembers he’s literally been swooning over this guy throughout the whole year

“eddie” he says “says so in here too”

he points at his chest

“ah! right” richie says

eddie turns his gaze to richie’s sticker

which says

“hi, my name is…

CHICKA CHICKA SLIM SHADY”

eddie raises his brows

“are you kidding me”

richie smirks

“pretty genius huh”

“no. thats awful. and used”

“you’re very negative aren’t you” richie smirks, tilting his head and sipping his drink 

eddie had no idea why he was like this tbh

somehow this guy annoyed him to the maximum?!??!!? BUT WHY?!?!?! 

just a few minutes ago he was standing in the elevator his tummy turning around at the thought of running into richie tonight

“you’re really weird” eddie just says

richie laughs

“is that all?”

eddie looks at him quietly

“sit down,,, eddie”

richie pats the empty seat next to him on the awful leather couch

eddie hesitates for a moment but then sits down

“so,,, eddie…..” richie starts “im richie”

eddie fake gasps

“so youre not slim shady???” he asks dryly

richie smirks so wide because ?!?!?!??! !

EDDIE KASPBRAK IS FINALLY TALKING TO HIM 

(he actually knew his name was eddie already)

(because richie’s got the BIGGEST crush)

(it all started when he saw eddie in the break room the first day and noticed eddie picking out a donut for five minutes and then glancing around to see no one was witnessing,,, he grabbed two)

(and didnt realize richie was outside behind the counter)

(so he asked his name from greta)

(and she told him)

(and the whole year richie wanted to talk to him but thought eddie wouldnt like him so he made sure everyone ELSE liked him first and that eddie would notice richie was actually very likable :(((( ) 

(ANYWAY BACK TO THE PRESENT MOMENT)

“i knew you were funny” richie says

“i am kinda funny” eddie shrugs

“thats unfair. usually you can only pick one”

eddie frowns 

“huh??”

“i mean,, you’re already cute as heck. and you’re also funny?? thats not fair. pick one”

eddie blushes vigorously as his jaw drops a little because holy fuck that was smooth

and richie smiles wide 

“youre-”

then all the people march back in from out of nowhere

“HEY RICHIE YOU WANNA COME TAKE SOME SHOTS? JAKE JUST GOT THE VODKA BOTTLE!”

they both stare at the workers,,, and then glance at each other

eddie’s kinda disappointed because he only ever hangs out with three people and richie’s the more famous one 

so obviously he’s gonna go with these people

why would he stay with eddie

“no thanks guys im gonna stay here with eds”

“with who????” eddie raises his brows in a excuse-me-what’d-ya-call-me way 

“you sure???” the guy who suggested shots asked, a little confused

“yeah” richie nodded “am perfectly comfortable here”

eddie blushes again but this time there’s a small smile to it as he looks at richie

richie winks at him

“okay. fine” the guy says

“BOOOOORING” one of them says from behind him and off they go 

“you didnt have to do that” eddie says

“but i wanted to” richie shrugs “why would i care about some vodka shots when i have something much more interesting going on here,,,”

“okay romeo enough with the flirting” eddie chuckles

“why though?” richie tilts his head “i find you extremely flirty-worthy”

“you dont even know me” eddie smiles amusedly 

“i know you stole two donuts on our first day” richie says and sips his drink as eddie gasps and his jaw drops

“I THOUGHT NOBODY SAW ME”

“well you thought wrong sweet tooth” richie smirks

“its just,,, who the hell can decide between a raspberry sprinkle and a salted caramel?!?!?!?”

��i totally get you” richie nods understandingly “i feel the same about a chocolate and a crunchy crunchy one”

“YEAH” eddie says “like honestly i think everyone should be allowed to take two donuts. one donut… what the fuck is this, the biggest loser????”

richie laughs

“yeah i know right”

“yeah” eddie says, sipping his cider again

and richie smiles

because wow they havent talked for even thirty minutes but he’s like so fucking whipped already????

“i didn’t tell anyone though” richie says

eddie looks at him for a moment,, his heart swelling up a little 

but he doesnt show it outside

“good. because i would have fucking wrecked you”

“oh i dont doubt that for a second” richie says

and he means it 

eddie looks at him for a moment ,,, starting to smile but then he laughs

like really laughs

and richie is heart eyes 

“whats your opinion on cinnamon sugar though?” richie asks

“its okay” eddie says “kind of boring,, but its okay”

“agreed” richie nods

they look at each other for a moment before eddie speaks

“i gotta confess”

“i am not the father”

eddie laughs again

richie’s proud w himself and smiles 

“no,, im serious. i uh,…. i knew your name was richie”

richie raises his brows lightly

“,,,reeeeaaallly????” he asks, starting to smirk 

of course eddie did

one of his work buddies,,, tacy caught him staring at richie one day 

…. 

“what are we looking at”

eddie gasped and turned around, seeing tacy wiggle her brows at eddie  with a cup of coffee in her hand

“jesus,, how long have you been standing there”

“long enough to notice you’re totally daydreaming about the new guy”

“I AM NOT DAYDREAMING ABOUT THE NEW GUY HOW DARE YOU!” eddie gasped

tacy raised her brows 

okay fine

tacy was right

eddie just glanced behind him again,,, looking at the curly haired guy unpacking his box

“you know him???” eddie asked and turned back around

“yeah” tacy shrugged “his name’s richie”

“richie??” eddie asked 

“richie tozier” tacy said, turning her gaze to the guy “and i would climb that up like a tree”

“hey! i saw him first” eddie half-joked, frowning and tacy burst out laughing

“calm down, kaspbrak, i’ve got a boyfriend” tacy said. “but if i didn’t, though…. mmmm-mmm-mm-”

eddie playfully smacked her arm, making tacy laugh again

“come on, we got work to do” tacy said

“but-”

“you can talk to him on lunch break”

—-

(he never did)

“yeah” eddie says “my uh… my friend tacy told me”

“tacy?? tacy’s your friend??” richie asks

eddie gets a little bothered

“…yeah why?”

like has tacy done something with richie???

“she’s been flirting with me this whole year” richie shrugs as he gulps on his drink and slouches deeper to the couch and eddie’s jaw drops

THAT BITCH

ok eddie knew she flirted with everyone

bUT STILL

“dont worry. i was actually focused on someone else” richie says,, and turns his gaze back to eddie 

whose tummy flips again

“…..reeaaaaallly” he imitates richie from earlier and richie of course notices this,,, starting to smirk

“yeah. reaaaaally” he says

eddie smirks wide back at him, before he notices his glass is empty

“well, richie, my glass is empty.”

“oh my god no,,, we have to change that”

“i know” eddie fake gasps 

“that can not happen” richie says and gets up, holding his hand out for eddie who grabs it and richie pulls him up

“at a office christmas party? no way you’re gonna be sober”

eddie chuckles

its music to richie’s ears

they walk to the drink table and get more drinks

approximately a hour and a half later they’re making out hot and heavily inside a broom closet

gotta love office christmas parties

@superbyersbros@xbell22@donthateonk8@stenbroughbros@reddiebrekmyheart@itsgreywaterrichie@donvex@blueeyespurpleskies@ageorgymi@oh-youre-the-worst @eddiekaaspbraak@whipashwhipash@rissyq@richietoaster@edskasqbrak@urtury@bukiminajimu@kcutieeesblog@stansmansuris@adorefack@reddieaddict@icyeyes102@denbroughbill@graveyardshipper@taletellingsir@anxiety-freak-yuuri@rheddie@queertrashmouth@richiefreakingtozier@castletozier@tohzier@80soleff@lonewolfhard@low-key-dying@sad-synth @richietoaster@badboyharrington@beepbeep-losers @temptedtozier @kaspbraccs @kylieee827-blog@sad-synth @low-key-dying @officiallyreddie @reddietofall@stanleyboii@eternitynurarms@remushlupin@turtleneckrichie @rosegoldrichie@80srichie@asteroidbill@lonewolfhard@trashmouthgazebos@littlepointman@finnhardwolf@allison0609@fabulousprinceali @tatiscribbles @s-s-georgie @coralinejones @richiestoziiers@tatiscribbles @bellsd129

[strawberryspeachy]

3 years ago my cat had kittens... i could still talk to my mom kind of.... and... things were ok aside from me being upset over some dumb boy

And i was thinking how i wanna go back. I miss my mom so much i want to go back. And was like. Well that wasnt a good time, a year before was better right?

Leading me to the reason why I was so miserable as a kid.

Look. Im a miserable person - i dont want to blame it all on one person but fuck man...

Everytime i think about times where i was happy, i realize SHE was the reason I WASNT.

Middle school - i had friends. I was smart. I liked school. I had hobbies and dreams. But i never wanted to leave school because i didnt want to come home. I didnt want to come home becauae of HER

I keep saying her like im talkig about my mom. Im not. Im talking about my great grandmother

I just sat here for 10 minites telling myself im stupid and making things up and making things out to be worse than they are.... i bet that thinking comes from her in all honesty

Thinking, “did she love me?” Now. I dont care. I dont miss her. Everytime i think about her its upsetting that i had her in my life... the only good thing i can ever say about her is “i know what its like to have a strict parent” THATS NOT GOOD. like fucking thanks for screaming at me every holiday to eat correctly. Now i know table manners. Thats all you did for me - while making me dread every fucking family dinner which aside from you was wonderful because my family used to be cool.

She ruined every holiday. She didnt want decorations. Were were gonna burn down the house. We were making a mess. We were being loud. She doesnt want this or that in HER HOUSE. She constantly chased everyone out the door because she NEVER had anything nice to say. The second she entered the room everyone made excuses to leave. When shed open her fucking creaking door the laughter would stop, smiles turn to cringes and wed all look at each other with the “welp the funs over” face

She was just so mean. You cant be happy because you’re not doing something she wanted you to do. Or you fucked something up. Theres some reason that youre supposed to be upset or concerned. BUT YOU CANT WIN THAT WAY EITHER - if youre upset - how dare you. You have so many good things you entitled undeserving brat. Fucking appriciate everything. The best way was some mixture where you smile but are ready to be pissed the fuck off in a moments notice. Cause if you wete more pissed off than she was the yelling was cut in half and mostly just her telling you not to give her that attitude - instead of a whole lecture on why you’re a fucking failure.

Everytime i think of a better time in my life. Its not even that much better because of that demon in my life. Constantly teling me shes gonna kick me out of the house. Constantly telling me im a burden to my mom. Constantly telling me im the reason for all her problems and saying that my animals were going to banrupt her.

The only thing i did well in her eyes was that i got good grades in school. She beleived my report card. Thats all. Pretty amazing that she could beleive that but thought i was too damn stupid to graduate college because there was a physical paper in front of her that she recognized

If i cooked or cleaned i did it wrong - if i didnt i should have

Why am i always at my best friends house?! “Her family doesnt want you there!!”

Why dont you play with your animals?!? Stop making noise playing with your animals!!

There was no escaping her. I broke my nose in a car accident and my friends mom took me for surgery. She came running out of the house to complain to my friends mom about how she could have taken me but i didnt ask her and im so awful - right after my surgery. Cause like why dont you want someone whose constantly bitching at you and telling you how shit you are to take you to a stressful surgery?

Conditional love... i already knew that... but its like the first time ive used it myself and havent just attributed the description.

She was my step - great grandmother. Shes all i ever knew but we werent blood related.

She loved my grandfather and my aunt and even my aunts two kids - the way family loves. She was still a bitch but she didnt disown them when they bugged her

The rest of us. Including my mom. Conditional love. Its not like she never did nice things. But she did expecting something in return.

Maybe shes why i dont like dealing with people im not allowed to say no to. Like i have such a deep seeded hatred for that relationship that the second i sense it i just refuse to deal with it again. You couldnt say no to her. You couldnt. If you said no to her about ANYTHING pack your fucking bags and get the hell out of HER HOUSE. that was her favorite two words. She needed my moms and grandfathers help and asked them to move in. But. We were guests in HER HOUSE.

I had some trauma as a kid that I probably would have gotten over if the happy family i knew before we moved to my great grandmothers stayed that way. But my aunt was always miserable. My uncle ran away as fast as possible. And my mom. A people pleaser. You know those old traditions where a man marrys and then he fucks off and does whatever he wants leaving his wife to serve his parents hand and foot. That was my moms life. He cheated on her and the demon made fun of her for everything, apparently constantly telling “dumb poloc” jokes. My mom cleaned everyday and cooked and took care of everyone and took care of our farm basically alone. I tried to help... i was a kid... and she was depressed. You wouldn’t know if you didnt really listen - which no one else in my family did.

And i looked at my mom everyday. I didnt really get it. All i knew was she was a wonderful kind generous happy - all around best human. And yet. Her life sucked. And she was sad. And i wonder if my mom would have been so sad if not for the demon...

My grandfather loved his mom.... but he used to never come in the house. My whole life. He was always out. The moment she died, he was always in the house. Maybe because he missed her and was sad.... but... i dont think so.... he stopped drinking a case of beer every night too

This whole post just to say... im mad that if goven the chance... im not sure if id go back to any of those times where i had to live with the demon... even though everything else at those times were good... the amount of stress and misery she gave me... almost outweigh the good... and. There was alot of good. I miss so many things.

I wanna be with my mom again. Without the dementia. I wanna be with my animals. I wanna be with my friends. I want second chances. I wanna make changes.

I loved her dude...i used to wish good things on her... i beleived she truely cared about me...

When she was dying. She couldn’t talk. Her friend called. I offered to put the phone to her ear. The friend was dismayed when i aswered. The tone of her voice changed. And she went “oh. The granddaughter.” She asked to talk to the demon as though i was holding the phone away from her and like i just wanted to hear whatever secrets she may have and wouldnt actually put it to her ear. She hung up angerly... as though... i wasnt an upset family member... i got preoccupied by the pleading look in my greatgrandmothers eyes. She wanted me to put the phone to her ear... but the woman had already hung up. I told her she had to go but said shes thinking of her. She looked so disappointed that she couldn’t hear it herself. And i felt... still feel bad... for the dying woman in her last days...

But maybe if she hadnt constantly talked about me as though i was the worst person because i dared to live my life the same as my aunt with animals and friends. But then go off to college but take a server job when o couldnt find a better one. Talked about me like i tried to kill her myself and that i was so lazy and rude and terrible. Maybe. Her bitchy friend. Wouldnt have hung up upon even having to interact with me

And then. Even in death. She made sure that i knew my place. she wrote her obituary herself. She put my aunts kids who are 13+ years younger than me, ahead of me, when listing her great grandchildren.