#im not doing every possible tag this is boring/silly

[snailsand]

whateverrrr what Ever . go my scarabs

[whumpacabra]

How would someone start posting their writings and things on tumblr...? Im new to actually posting and lost!

Hi! My advice is largely writing based; I’ll put a more detailed explanation under the cut, but basically:

1. Change your default blog icon/bio/etc. if you haven’t already (people may mistake you for a bot and block you if you’re using the default avatar!)

2. Keep your posts organized, especially writing. Make it easy for a reader to find a list of chapters, the previous, and the next piece in a series by linking them on a post.

3. Initiate interaction and maintain connections. Reblog other writer’s work with comments in the tags or notes; play ‘ask games’ off anon or DM blogs you want to be friends with. It’s awkward and intimidating but honestly consistent interaction is what will bring people to your blog regardless of its content, just to check out what your blog is like.

Customizing your blog

This is a big one - regardless of your blog content or interactions, no one trusts a default icon in their notes. Make it a stock image watermarked photo, make it a solid color, but do not leave it as the default geometric shape. Bots and spam accounts rarely customize their icons, so you’ll be lumped in with them and summarily blocked.

Blog titles aren’t super important, but it can be nice to customize it to your blog content or just a silly phrase to indicate “hello I am a real human do not block me please.” Blog descriptions are pretty straightforward. I advise going light on personal details (especially if you’re a minor) but generally a name people can refer to you as and your pronouns is all people are looking for in a description. You can also customize your blog colors, but it’s a good idea to be mindful of readability (eg. avoiding eye strain, colorblind unfriendly combinations, etc.).

I would also recommend turning on your blog’s custom theme (see guide linked here). This can only be done on desktop, but it makes my second point about organization easier. A standard blog will link as tumblr.url.com, but a custom domain will like as url.tumblr.com. A custom theme changes your blog’s links to ‘permalinks.’ This means that if you change your blog name (its url), permalinks will not break, so you don’t have to go through every link on every post to change your url in the link. You can also edit the html custom theme of your blog it this is enabled, as well as access your blog archive.

Organization and links

Obviously tagging your work appropriately helps it reach people - tag browsing is generally how people find blogs to follow outside of their dashboard. But that means you might tag chapter 26 of a work that shows up, in isolation, for a reader. If they think it’s interesting and want to go to the very beginning, how many clicks does it take? It shouldn’t take too many - people get bored or frustrated very quickly when investigating something new and might decide it isn’t worth their time.

Appropriately linking up your story and making it easily accessible to readers isn’t a hard and fast ‘you must do it this way or no one will ever read anything’ kind of rule. But, I think, making your posts as easy and simple as possible for a new reader to approach is good. A reader might scroll through your blog post by post to find what they want, but if you make it easy for them, it decreases their frustration or boredom by minimizing search time.

The easiest and first step would be to make a masterpost. This can be a Blog Masterpost (usually pinned, containing multiple links to multiple different story masterposts- not just chapters) or a Story Masterpost (tagged with the story name, one story’s chapters all consolidated in one place). You can see an example of a pinned blog masterpost and it’s linked story masterposts at the top of my blog.

If you’re writing a sequential story (or intend to have the story readable in a sequential chapter by chapter order), it helps the reader to link a) the story masterpost, b) the previous chapter, and c) the next chapter, somewhere on the post itself. You can see a few different examples of that in my writing posts, as my style and UI philosophy has evolved over time.

Organizing your writing by tag isn’t as ‘important’ as tagging your story appropriately for new readers to find. If you haven’t been here long, you should know that tumblr’s search function can be truly terrible and fail to find something you know to exist. This is why activating your blog’s custom theme (and therefore it’s archive and the ability to access a post’s permalink) is so important. You can manually force a search of a specific tag if you’re at a url.tumblr.com blog, but you are at the whims of tumblr’s noodle code trying to search a tumblr.url.com blog.

I tag my writing (and reblogs of other people’s writing) with specific unique tags so that I personally can have an easier time searching for them, but not everyone will notice, use, or care for unique tag searching given tumblr’s unpredictability.

Interact

So, your blog looks like it was made by a human being, your posts are meticulously organized and easily accessible, now what? Do you just wait for someone browsing the #enemies to lovers tag to find your story? No!

Tumblr is a microblogging platform with social media elements. There is no traditional algorithm that will magically bring your target audience to your blog. If you want to be social, you need to initiate social interactions. That means reblogging posts as a bare minimum.

Liking posts can garner some interaction - someone might see your icon in their notes and think oh a person let me check out their blog - but it doesn’t…say anything. Reblogging a post says very clearly ‘i want to share this with people’ regardless of your actual follower count (‘cause this is tumblr and no one but you can see your follower count, as it should be).

If you’re reblogging someone else’s work, you probably liked it, and might have some compliment or comment regarding it - share it! You can ramble in the tags, write in the notes, or write it directly in your reblog. This a) is a really nice thing to do; writers love and remember people who have comments on their writing and b) reinforces that you’re a human being (that a writer could personally thank, start a conversation with, share ideas, etc.). Having something to say makes you stand out in someone’s activity, and in the notes of a post. Both the OP and anyone else looking at that post will see your comment or tags, and that can incentivize them to check out your blog and your writing.

Obviously you want to approach this as a community building exercise, not min-maxing your interaction to get the most attention, but you shouldn’t be super friendly or overly involved if you don’t want to - it will show and come off as insincere. This is where the whole ‘be yourself’ thing comes in where it’s trite and sucks but it’s true. There are people who will vibe with you somewhere on this hellsite, you just gotta find them. Step out of your comfort zone but don’t force yourself to be something you’re not.

[insertdisc5]

Hi!! I wanted to ask, in celebration of Deltarune CH. 2, do you have any updated thoughts and head canons about the game?? Like, y'know, similar to a previous ask about Kris in your Deltarune tag? Thanks!

thoughts on kris part 2 i guess???? (part 1 from ch1 here lol)

spoilers for deltarune like woah. this wont be kris focused just random thoughts on everything. thank you for giving me the opportunity to talk

not that many thoughts for this chapter tbh! EDIT LOL: this was a lie i have a lot of thoughts

-just in general i feel like the player isn't the only one controlling kris... like yes the player forced kris to do what happened in the snowgrave route but AT THE SAME TIME idk it feels like there's someone else too. just because of the terrifying voice i suppose. and also the jerky movement kris does every time they get their soul out? unless there's another reason for it... maybe getting your soul out means you walk weird lol

-BUT ALSO i feel like kris is 100% in control when they create fountains. idk it just makes sense kris would create them. to create another world, a better world, A WORLD WHERE THEIR BROTHER IS HERE PERHAPS? i do wonder why they get their soul out then though. i'm all for it sweetie! do whatever! i support you!

-(i am and will be playing deltarune with only kris' best interests in mind. i will not hurt anyone unless kris wants me to. dont worry my little meow meow im on your side! talk to me! no? okay ill stay under the sink its fine)

-speaking of asriel. SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER VACATION COLLEGE WHEN? SUMMER (starts crying) V-VACATION COLLEGE WHEN

-kris misses their brother so much it's so sad. if you make kris steal 5$ from asriel they take it "reluctantly"? talking to asriel online so often even alphys knows?? the google search?? GOING INTO ASRIEL'S GOOGLE SEARCH ROOM WITH THEIR EYES CLOSED BECAUSE THEY'RE CONVINCED THEY ALREADY KNOW WHATS IN THERE? THAT ONE IS LESS OF A MISSING THING BUT IM LIKE OH MY GOD

-the city walk with susie at the end makes it clear to me that kris really values susie's friendship... kris even sits with her if you spend long enough near the lake like aaaaah ;_;

-and even in snowgrave you spend your last acts with the final boss calling for your friends like YES there's a way bigger creepy aspect to this (kris as more of a Leader who Commands and commands their subjects to come) but still :'0 (and then noelle answers oh my god noelle im so sorry for the trauma)

-berdly. listen. listen. listen. liste

-berdly sucks but [berdly hurts his arm in the battle against queen if you don't save him because he doesnt want to hurt you] [berdly realizing smg's wrong in snowgrave and immediately taking steps to save noelle] berdly is my little crumb nugget. i will protect him.

-noelle. noelle. girlboss!

-like ooooh listen. hearing about the genocide path for undertale. made me go "that is SO COOL. i HAVE to experience it myself this is great. hehehe killing time" and like no regrets. i was fully enjoying the experience knowing i was an awful person. SNOWGRAVE THOUGH. i will never try this myself its too fucked up. casually grooming your childhood friend to murder people <3 and also acting like a weird stalker towards her <3 stockholm syndrome speedrun i will get all the info i can about this but i will never do this myself

-people remarking the kris/player>noelle relationship is similar to the relationship between player>chara in genocide path is like yes. chefs kiss. don't worry we just are making you stronger and everything will be fine "you made me kill my friend? and for what?" this is fine sweetie don't worry about it!!!!!!

-like the amount of details added to snowgrave, like if you equip noelle's watch she notices later? and her battle animations change as time goes on, she gets an ice shield and stops sighing in relief after battle? oh my god? oh my god.

-(berdly is not awake.) JUST KILL ME RIGHT HERE I HAVEN'T STOPPED THINKING ABOUT BERDLY NOT BEING AWAKE!!!!!

-also why didnt he turn into dust. so many possible reasons. is magic a thing in the normal world and perhaps no magic means no dust (theres graves). maybe he isnt dead. maybe hes braindead. maybe he'll come back. either way that boy is now in the closet big enough to put someone in

-also dess' name probably being december AND THATS WHY NOELLE LOST THE SPELLING BEE?!?!??! FUCK ME UP!!!!! JUST FUCK ME UP!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!

-also so many good pixel art this chapter. too many? i didnt need pixel art of cardboard noelle falling on the statue. like thank you but please. please it hurts my game artist brain.

-the expressions in this chapter were also top notch. all the unsettling noelle expressions like (i fall over face first)

-i threw away the ball of junk (which i already tried in ch1) and this time the game was like "ARE YOU SURE BC THIS IS A BAD IDEA" and kris felt bitter :'( (it deletes all your items in the dark world)

-i uh fucked up and skipped the susie+noelle scene bc listen last time ralsei mentionned seeing what susie is doing we missed some PRIMO LORE. turns out it just makes you skip the scene and you dont get anything new. welp

-speaking of ralsei well you know. he exists. but im stuck on him going "i just wonder what being ralsei-like even is...?" ralsei my dude there's so much i could say about this. do you feel like you can't be ralsei-like because you feel like you have to be asriel-like

-but also that makes no sense bc susie hasnt even mentioned ralsei looks like asriel. and i cant imagine asriel being so meek. so WHAT GIVES

-ralsei as kris’ “i wish i was a monster just like my bro and family and i’d look like asriel but with red horns [THE HALLOWEEN COSTUME] and my name would be something cool like ralsei instead of a boring human name like kris and im sweet and cute because thats how i act with asriel because ASRIEL MADE ME” theory because that would be cute.

-ASRIEL GOING TO THE CHURCH TO CONFESS HIS "SINS" WHEN "SINS" AREN'T A THING IN THE ANGEL BELIEF LIKE I KNOW THIS INTERACTION WAS TREATED AS A JOKE BUT WHAT THE FUCK ASRIEL?

-kris definitely has a connection with the big red door in the city, judging by what the kids say they probably went there... i feel like this place's dark world will be the Final Dungeon you KNOW some shit happened there. also the sounds you hear when you go there is the phone dark world call's sound slowed down? AND AFTER SNOWGRAVE APPARENTLY YOU CANT HEAR IT ANYMORE? HUWAH?

-speaking of songs the songs were all so good, My Castle Town rules, the berdly snowgrave music is stuck in my head, flashback is uwah wuahah, Until Next Time is so good, AND ALSO A FRIEND NOTICED THE DARK WORLD CITY THEME IS JUST tHE SONG 74 (MOST NOTICEABLE WITH THE SNOWGRAVE VERSION)?????? WHAT DOES IT MEAN????? it might be just "hey its just reuse" BUT MR FOX YOU KNOW WE'RE GONNA READ INTO THIS IS NOELLE THE ONE SINGING IDK BRO!!!!!!!!!!

-asgore dreemurr fired from the force what happun!!!!! game theory is that asgore is related to dess' death/disappearance but eh who knows

-you start the chapter at lvl2 and get to lvl3 after the final boss, a friend mentioned this is probably because we destroyed a world and im :0

-to go back to kris it's still so interesting to figure out who they are based on how they act/people mention them. like kris shaking the ferris wheel car? yeah makes sense i can imagine a pranking kid do this. kris' dance? yeah thats a little silly but i can buy it. doing cool anime poses? well i dunno this doesnt line up PERFECTLY but sure. BUT EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN SNOWGRAVE... especially >proceed like that is such a weird thing that i can't imagine them doing, but i can't completely see the "player" doing either (compare with going to sans -which kris doesnt know- and going "SANS!" because of course the player would know sans), like THATS one of the reasons i feel like there's someone else in there. the weird robotic merciless actions. if im going super meta it feels like there'd be someone else like writing the choices into existence for us to pick you know? gaster probably? god i need to read more gaster theories i completely sidestepped the gaster shit bc i wasnt interested. anyway just spitballing

-(looks at big shot guy) please dont make him the next tumblr guy i beg you

-obligatory "queen was great" mention if only because this part made me laugh a little bit too hard

that was a lot. thank you for letting me talk

[spectracully]

crash the crush.

pairings : senior student!xiaojun x sophomore student!reader warnings : profanity, underage drinking, mentions of drugs genre : fluff, a bit of crack? highschool!au word count : 4.3k

summary : what are the odds of crashing into your crush during the neighborhood-friendly run and mutual friends party?

You were pissed off when your mum said you need to work your lazy ass off. Well, if it's on the summer break, you'll most likely agree with her. But it's only the weekend, and you've been studying your ass off these days. A lazy weekend is something you earned, but your mum decided to rain on your lazy parade.

With all those groans and deep sighs, you storm off your house wearing your workout gear. Not much, only a windbreaker jacket paired with shorts and running shoes. Popping your airpods on both of your ears to blast some jams, you take some light jogging steps on your neighborhood. It's only 4.30 pm, and kinda windy, why the fuck are you doing this? That's right, because mum literally compared you to your neighbor's daughter, Giselle, who recently won a karate tournament. Now mum won't even shut up how much she wants an active daughter, not the lazy one. Yikes.

Back to the streets by Saweetie & Jhene Aiko plays, and you hear a message notification on your airpods. Still on your light jogs, you glance at the notification.

yeri<3 : yo yeri<3 : wyd

You stop jogging for a while to write your bestfriend back. It's saturday, she's probably asking you to hangout along with the gang. Yeri gets easily bored at home and in constant need of hanging out.

y/n : running  💃 💃 💃 y/n : mum said i need to be giselle

You continue your pace while waiting for her reply. You can see your neighborhood clearly now, seeing the details, since you always go to school in a sleepy state, not really noticing the environment, and also going home from school mostly sleeping in your brother's car.

The notification rings again. It must be Yeri.

yeri<3 : bitch thats a dancing emoji yeri<3 : running in a weather like this? yeri<3 : damn straight u wanna be giselle

You chuckle as you’re about to type the messages once more, the weather is fine, what the hell is she talking about? But then Yeri is still typing. 

yeri<3 : n e ways yeri<3 : party at lucas' 8pm yeri<3 : be there or be fucking square 💀 💀 💀

You sigh. There she goes. No other option than tag along with her, but it's not like you hate it anyway. Lucas' party is always awesome, you and your friends also will get a VIP pass because he's a good friend of yours too, despite the fact that you're not even in the same grade as him, he's one year above you and Yeri.

y/n : weather is nice dont jinx it y/n : fine but pick me up y/n : cuz doyoung won't let me drive his car

You send the messages to Yeri to prove her the weather is fine, and indicates that you agree to go to Lucas' house tonight, it's a great night to probably get wasted after all those tiring run mum decided to toss on you. It's gonna be fun, anyways. But the thing about hanging out with Lucas and his senior friends.. You might've developed a big fat crush with one of Lucas' closest friends, Xiaojun. 

You barely had an interaction with him, though, because he's usually the quiet and calm one in Lucas' closest friends group. Lucas himself is already so fucking loud, not to mention Hendery, the good-looking clown and moodmaker. There's also Jungwoo, the one who looks very calm but actually won't shut up once you talk to him. Mark too, the giggly one with some lame jokes. Well, going to Lucas' party tonight means you can see Xiaojun, probably getting the chances that you'll have some interaction over some boozes or something is also quite high.

After feeling all warmed up, you decide to give yourself a run around the block. Yeri's right, it's a funny weather to run. It's windy, but the more you stay outside, the cloud is getting darker and darker. You also knew that you're not really alone, who's doing this athletic bullshit in this kind of weather, you noticed that a boy is also doing this silly run when you were typing messages to Yeri. Probably just another neighbor's child being scolded by his mum of how Giselle is so athletic that his mum also wants an active son? Welp, you didn't see his face anyway, you were glued to the phone when you saw the figure running from the side.

It's not even a minute after you started running, Yeri already replied again. Is she really that bored that she doesn't have anything to do?

yeri<3 : ok i'll pick u up at 7 yeri<3 : um.. its fucking raining, y/n yeri<3 : go home and take a shower yeri<3 : pick ur clothes and put on some makeup instead yeri<3 : its saturday night, activate your hoe protocol yeri<3 : mr xiaojun is going to be there tonight

You stop running and stare at her messages. Raining? Is she drunk or what? It's not even 5pm yet and here she is, hallucinating-

Oop. There it goes. You feel some water drops on your head. Your hand. It was slow at first, but then the raindrops are getting harder and harder, it's pouring. 

"Motherfu-" you let out a curse, you should've trusted Yeri on this. As an intuitive homo sapiens with XX chromosomes, you scan through the streets, looking for some shelter to wait the rain to stop. Spotting a bus stop with a large steel canopy, you run like your life depended on it, avoiding the rain.

Finally arriving, you sigh and sit on the installed chair, typing messages to Yeri.

y/n : omg bitch ur right its raining y/n : should've pretended im dead in my room so mum wont bug me y/n : u know what after the rain ends im gonna sprint back home and take a fucking shower y/n : the universe doesnt like it when im trying to be giselle, it gave me rain instead

You sigh as you shuffle through your playlist, looking for some fun jams to pass your time through the rain, when somebody suddenly approaches you.

"Hi, do you mind if I take a seat here?" a boy asks, pointing to the chair next to you. You look up, and suddenly the next thing you wanna do is ascend your soul the fuck out of your body to the sky. 

Oh boy. It's Xiaojun. The boy you won't shut up about. He’s wearing a white loose tank and grey sweatpants, drenched in his own sweat. Oh god. This is truly an attack for you. What the fuck is he doing here? And why must you meet him at your mess like being all salty because of those running fiasco and the rain? While wearing your not-so-fashionable workout gear and not-so-tidy ponytails? Oh god.

You can feel your heart is about to explode when you realize that he is actually the person who is also doing the stupid running at this very weather, you just didn't notice it sooner because you were on your damn phone. Damn, mum was right, everything happened because you were always on your damn phone.

"No, of course! Take a seat!" you answer him, trying your best to crack your sweetest smile although it's more like sweatiest not sweetest.

He smiles back at you, taking a seat next to you, then his eyes get back to his phone, completely glued. Damn this is the only cardio that is worth it, no running, no jumping, no huff that huff this, only sitting next to Xiaojun on a rainy day on a bus stop. Wonderful.

You quickly whip up the messaging app to type all kinds of gibberish and send it to Yeri. She knows what shit is about to go down when you speak gibberish to her.

y/n : FUCKJSHSJJSKSJK YERI y/n : OH MY FUCKING GOD SJSGSJSHSKJSK

Lucky you, Yeri has nothing to do than respond to your messages, she stays put on the chat room.

yeri<3 : OMG BITCH WHAT yeri<3 : SKSHSJJSKS YOU SCARED ME

y/n : HE's FUCKING HERE AHSJSHSJEK

yeri<3 : OMG WHOS HE?? yeri<3 : THE DEVIL??? IS HE GONNA TAKE UR SOUL? SKEJSJKSKSK

y/n : XIAOJUN y/n : TURNS OUT HE ALSO LIVES IN THIS NEIGHBORHOOD

yeri<3 : ASKJSJSKSK WHAT yeri<3 : HOW

y/n : KAHSKSJKS omg bitch y/n : i was sheltering myself from the goddamn rain y/n : im in bus stop rn y/n : this angel came to accompany me y/n : HE WAS RUNNING TOO OMG y/n : omg yeri just so u know if im not there when u pick me up y/n : its bc im in church getting married with my man xiaojun

yeri<3 : BITCH OMG SKSKSKSKK yeri<3 : GET MARRIED RN yeri<3 : WAIT dont waste the chance yeri<3 : talk to him rn!!!

You swear you're about to scream when Yeri sends that. She was actually right, this is your chance to talk to him, considering that you didn't really interact that much with him. But really? He didn't even say a word when he sat, probably didn't even remember your name? The disappointment slowly gets into your head.

You freeze on the spot. torn between wanting to talk to him and just let it slide, you'll see him again tonight as Lucas' house, right?

Just when you decide to give up and not say a word, he turns his head to you.

"Hey, I didn't know you live in this neighborhood too," he starts.

Oh god. If every time your heart beats fast you get a dollar, you'd probably have your own private island by now.

You try to play it cool when actually on the inside you wanna scream I LIKE YOU to his face rn. "Oh? Oh yes, my house is number 13." you answer calmly,

He cracks a smile, “13? You’re Doyoung’s little sister?”

Oh god. What the fuck is this clownery? He knows Doyoung? Why and how? At this rate you just wanna evaporate to the rain, what if Doyoung actually knows that you liked Xiaojun and he spills it? Oh god. 

You smile back at him, holding the panic you’ve been keeping since he mentioned Doyoung’s name. “Yep. I’m his sister.”

“Oh god, why didn’t I notice that earlier? I could’ve taken care of you at school!” he exclaims, and you sure you just wanna evaporate to the rain. Him? Taking care of you at school? YES PLEASE!

You let out a small giggle, trying to be as calm as possible when in reality you’re very sure you just wanna melt like a goddamn popsicle on a hot summer day. “So, how do you know my brother, actually?”

He laughs a bit, wiping away the sweat on his forehead. Oh god, he’s just so beautiful. “Well.. Doyoung and I used to be a dynamic duo in the school's choir, until he graduated.”

Oh, that. Doyoung is pretty serious about his career in the school’s choir, but you did not expect that Xiaojun is actually a part of it. Of course, he has the face of an angel, the voice is included.

“Now I know why Doyoung never let me come to his house. Turns out he has a cute- I mean, h-he has a sister, and that’s you! M-Maybe he’s afraid I’ll bother you or s-something.” he continues, stuttering a bit, and letting out an awkward laugh. You laugh again, feeling the blood rushing to your cheeks that you can’t hide no more. DID HE JUST SAY DOYOUNG HAS A CUTE SISTER? DID HE JUST SAY YOU’RE CUTE? DID HE-

But then, good things always come to an end. The goddamn rain stops. Oh fuck, no more chitter chatter with the dear crush. Just when it is the fucking time you need to hear the goddamn wedding bells, the rain decided to stop on your rain parade. Fuck.

He looks up, and seems like noticing the rain has stopped. “Well, Y/n. Lucas is having a party tonight, are you coming?”

You can feel your cheeks are still heating from his words, you shyly nod to him. Welp, maybe the rain has stopped, but this stupid crush? No. It goes on. Very much.

He stands up, straightening his white loose tank, getting ready to probably sprint back home. “Okay. See you tonight then, I’m going home. Have a good run!” he says as he walks away from the bus stop, leaving you dumbfounded. And lovestruck. That’s a win, alright.

Xiaojun slowly fades away from your view, and you’re still drowning on your pool of love. Yep, that’s it. You can’t even hold it, you quickly dial Yeri’s number to break out the news.

“What is it, Y/n? You literally left me on read for like 14 minutes straight and now you-”

“YERI LISTEN I’M GETTING MARRIED TONIGHT AND THAT’S A FUCKING FACT!” you shout to the phone, you can picture Yeri is probably goggling out her eyes right now.

“Girl, just because Xiaojun just asked you why the fuck were you running at times like this it doesn’t mean-”

“HE CALLED ME CUTE!” you blurted out,cutting her sentences for the second time,

“-you’re getting married- WHAT?? HE CALLED YOU WHAT?” Yeri yelled from the phone, now it’s pretty clear that Yeri is probably jumping her ass off right now.

You sprint your way to home, while holding your phone to your ears, continuing to give Yeri the details about the bus stop conversation you had earlier. Now she’s just yelling at you to pick the right dress and pamper yourself up, the probability you’ll marry Xiaojun at Lucas’ party is increasing. Sure it does.

-------

It’s 11.28 PM, 3 hours and a half since you and Yeri just arrived at Lucas’ house, escaping from Doyoung’s warning to you, to get back in one piece, and most importantly, sober. As if you’re gonna leave Lucas’ house sober, that’s funny, alright. You and Yeri were greeted by Yangyang and Donghyuck, who are currently setting up the table for snacks and drinks. That was probably the first time you saw Donghyuck ever setting up something, because if not, Jungwoo would’ve set his ass on fire.

The party madness has started, seems like everybody already has enough alcohol running on their system. Lucas is already losing his shirt and starts twerking in the middle of his house along with Jaemin and Jungwoo. Ah yes, the thot trio already started their thing, and all you have to do is just stay back and avoid getting dragged to the dance mess, because the chance of Jungwoo and Jaemin will start grinding at you is kinda high right now.. Considering their.. Twerking fiasco.

You sit back on the couch and watch your friends getting crazy over the playlist Yangyang made just for this event, sipping on your cocktails that Donghyuck put god-knows-what in it, he said it’s just cherry juice mixed with gin and brandy, but somehow it tastes kinda citrusy. You glance to the right, only to see Yeri making out with some random guy (probably one of Lucas’ friends named Changbin but oh well, that’s Yeri’s business).

Slightly grossed out and sad because apparently you’re not making out with Xiaojun right now, you make your way to the patio, and find the crowd that circle around a spinning bottle. Interested, you join Jeno, Mark, Renjun, Yeji, Hyunjin, Sungchan, Karina, Vernon, Hendery, and of course, the (hottest) most important person right now, Xiaojun.

“Welcome! As a newly joined member.. Truth or dare?” Jeno greets you as you take a seat between Mark and Sungchan. Well, you’d love to sit beside Xiaojun, but apparently, that seat is already taken by Hendery and Vernon.

You silently glance at Xiaojun, who is wearing a denim jacket with light-yellow knit top underneath, paired with white trousers. Damn, he looks so damn good that you wanna cry a river.

Your head comes back to the question Jeno asked. Today’s your day, be bold or bald. It’s time. “Well, I’m not gonna put my drunk antics to waste. Dare then.” you answer boldly, earning a few ‘ooooh’s from your friends.

Jeno snickers. Well, fuck. Guess you’re a bit too damn bold tonight, the realization suddenly hits you like a fucking trainwreck, Jeno is kinda extreme for games like this. Wrong choice, y/n. You gulp as you wait for Jeno to come up with something.

“I dare you to kiss Xiaojun!” Jeno exclaims, clapping both of his hands like a goddamn happy seal. Mark and Hendery are high-fiving right now, throwing whistles around Xiaojun, who is silent as a fucking rock.

Oh god. Things you’ve said about not putting your drunk antics to waste should’ve stayed in that goddamn draft. This is where Jeno takes you, even though you’re secretly happy that you finally get to kiss your goddamn crush, that shit is EMBARRASSING. If you wanna evaporate to the waters, then it’s probably the right time to do it.

But why Xiaojun though? Is your big fat crush on him too obvious?

You freeze on the spot as you awkwardly smile and stare at Jeno. This shit can’t be real. Jeno is goddamn crazy. You can feel the air is getting hot, whether it’s because the alcohol starts kicking in, or just because the blood is rushing through your head.

“Scared, aren’t you?” Jeno taunts you, sipping his beer as the rest of the group laugh except you and Xiaojun, who is currently staring at you with a questionable expression. Is he pleased? Or is he pissed? Oh god.

“I-I’m not!” you answer him, leaning to Xiaojun, gulping once more before asking him, “You’re okay with this though?”

Xiaojun smirks, “How can I say no to you?” he asks back, accompanied by a few ‘ayyy~’ from the boys, sending butterflies to your stomach. Your face is probably as red as a tomato by now.

Good god. Is this the same Xiaojun who is quiet, calm, and collected among his friends? Why suddenly he is so bold? Oh, he’s probably just drunk and won’t remember this kiss anyway.. You lean closer to him, closing the gap between his face and yours by sealing the kiss. His lips are soft yet firm, almost like a grape jelly you had earlier this afternoon, with a hint of vodka, of course.

After a few seconds, you finally pull out and linger your eyes on him. It’s beautiful, and mesmerizing. You just wish that you can see it again, and only for you, no one else. As you get back to your seat, you take one more last glance at him, that is currently also glancing at you, with his cheeks red.

Okay. You definitely heard the wedding bells, thanks Jeno. That’s probably one of your dreams, and thanks to Jeno, it came true. But unfortunately, Xiaojun probably won’t feel the same, or worse, he’ll probably forget about it tomorrow.

Everyone claps, exchanging happy exclaims and cheers as if you just said ‘I do’ to Xiaojun lol, when in reality, you were just doing the dare Jeno gave you. You gulp bitterly as the game goes on and on.

-----

It’s an hour past midnight, 1.12 AM to be exact. Thank god you’re not that shitfaced, but Yeri is. She is not even capable of doing anything anymore except being all smiley and shit, Changbin already drove her home like fifteen minutes ago, leaving you behind in Lucas’ lair. You suddenly felt the urge to thank god that Yeri made a fantastic decision last minute before picking you up, she used a taxi instead of driving. If she hadn’t, you’re probably stuck driving her home right now.

You scan through the house while leaning through the stair railings, looking for an easy target to get a free ride. Finally spotted your friends, you now have 3 choices : Donghyuck (who is currently seducing some random girl), Yangyang (who is now playing mobile games with Jaemin and Chenle), or Mark (who recently just hit a goddamn blunt, but he’s very capable to drive).

You sip your glass of water, making up your mind for your ride home. But then, suddenly someone taps on your shoulder.

“Do you wanna go home? Like, right now? I can drive you- I mean, our house is like, near.” you hear Xiaojun speaking to you, holding his car keys on his left hand.

Good gracious, is this even real? Like, Xiaojun, is actually asking you to go home with him? Is this real? Or are you just hallucinating from the goddamn weed you take 10 minutes ago from Lucas?

You stare at him blankly. He bit his lip, “I mean- If you wanna stay longer- or probably-”

“Yes, of course! Let’s go.” you smile at him, cutting off his words.

3 times in a day. Good job, Y/n! The wedding is up ahead!

He smiles and gives you a gesture, “Ladies first.”

-

The drive is not as awkward as you thought. Turns out, Xiaojun is full of surprise though, you nearly choked when he said he once formally apologized to Doyoung before he stood up to defend the dignity of Mint Chocolate Chip flavored ice cream. It’s delightful to find out that he has similar tastes as you, from ice cream flavor to music and school subjects.

Xiaojun also told you the reason why he was on the run earlier, he was bored. Damn, look at it, the difference between a forced daughter whose mum wants an active child, and a bored model-student. He said he didn’t expect to see you because he was embarrassed, he was drenched in sweat.

You can feel the butterflies on your stomach grow wilder and wilder from every word he said, or maybe it’s just the way he smiles when he talks to you? Welp, if it’s anything to do with Xiaojun, you’ll most likely get butterflies.

Just when you thought he was drunk, he is not. He’s capable of driving you home and carrying on some fun convos, also remembering little things. So.. perhaps, he is not going to forget the kiss you shared because of Jeno’s dare?

As you keep on exchanging conversation with him, suddenly it’s time to get off his car and get back to your house, get ready to deal with Doyoung’s nags and scolds for getting home this late.

You giggle as you take the seat belt off, smiling at the brown haired boy.

“Thank you for driving me home, Xiaojun. It was fun.” you say to him, waving him goodbye as you open the door. He smiles and waves back at you.

Just when you’re about to open the gate of your house, you hear the sound of slamming car doors. You turn around and see Xiaojun standing in front of you, eyes sparkling like a goddamn star. Unfortunately, it’s not Christmas.. If it is, all you want for Christmas is to stare at Xiaojun’s beautiful eyes all day, and probably get married to him.

“Um.. Y/n.. I don’t know how to say this but.. The kiss you gave me earlier, it’s kinda..” he starts, smiling sheepishly.

Oh god, what now? It’s kinda what? Gross? You swear you’ll kill Jeno if you hear that from Xiaojun.

You gaze at him as you wait for him to complete his sentences.

“It’s kinda.. Making me feel.. Things.” he finally continues, rubbing the back of his neck while looking away from you, flustered. It’s pretty cute.

You giggle at him a little, the butterflies come back, or maybe they never even left?

“Don’t laugh, Y/n. I’m being honest, I was pretty embarrassed to run into you during sheltering, and now you’re laughing at me for-”

You let out a big laugh before you pull him to another kiss. This one is a bit longer, more passionate and intimate, unlike the one you had before. He cups your cheek as you feel him smiling during the kiss.

“I’m sorry if I invaded your privacy- but your fast typing was very.. Intriguing.. I might’ve seen you texting Yeri at the bus stop.” he giggles after you pull out from the kiss.

Yikes. You feel like you’re about to burst now. He saw you texting Yeri? What kind of clownery is this? Did he see you typing- oh god, that’s too embarrassing to remember.

“No! That’s too embarrassing!” you cover your face, he laughs once more.

“Now, which church are we going to? I’m pretty sure you said we’re getting married tonight, right?” he takes your hands off your face, grinning widely.

You pout and lightly hit him, only to be attacked by his hugs a second later. Aww, finally, dreams do come true. You stay on his embrace for a few more minutes, no talking, just comfortable silence and realization that you’re on Xiaojun’s arms right now.

You glance at your watch, Doyoung would be furious by now. Telling him that you really have to go before Doyoung can rise from his sleep and beat your ass, you finally wave goodbye to him as he gets back to his car.

Finally entering the house, you’re greeted by Doyoung who’s standing in front of you, holding a bowl of salad on his right hand.

“So, kissing Xiaojun in front of my salad?” he raises his eyebrow.

You stick out your tongue as you make your way upstairs. Technically, not in front of Doyoung’s salad, because the door was closed. He’s probably looking through the window, such a nosy brother. You laugh at the thought of Doyoung getting furious while eating his salad as you get a message.

Xiaojun : so, see you at school? Xiaojun : can’t wait to hold your hand on monday ;)

[lyricalimerence]

10 Things I Hate About You • 001

masterlist • 001, 002, 003... coming soon

Chapter One — The Rule

summary: jj & rafe talk w/ the dean, regular expositional stuffs

word count: 1618

warnings: a singular swear word, sexual innuendos & use of euphemisms for terms used in writing smut, allusions to underage drug use.

a/n: i hope this chapter isn't boring 😔 but yALL IM BEYOND EXCITED TO START THIS YOU HAVE NO IDEA KDJD

The Kildare County High School of the Outer Banks in North Carolina is a tale of two cities. The Kooks and the Pogues each have their metaphorically crowned Princes and Princesses, and separate castes in their social hierarchies walking the halls. As one Kook Princess, Kacey Brooks, violently rips a poster advertising the Spring Fling dance off the bulletin board, the Pogue Prince, JJ Maybank, and the Kook Prince, Rafe Cameron, are just about to run into each other in the doorway of the Dean’s office.

The Dean is a thin woman with a raspy voice. She’s snappy, vulgar, and in the midst of writing plotless, and pointless, smut into a novel.

JJ is sat on the opposite side of the Dean's desk, starting at the HP emblem etched into the back of her computer, the clacking of the keyboard keys echoed through the office. He knew why he landed himself there, he just wished she would let him go already. She wanted him gone, he wanted him gone, cut out the middleman and let him leave. The Dean wanted to write out graphic ( and disturbing ) sex scenes, and JJ wanted to get to the quad where he could watch Gracie Brooks from afar in between second and third period.

The Dean carefully closed her laptop, her thin, almost witchy fingers treating her creative medium with more respect than she's ever shown the students of Kildare County. Tapping her thick, pink framed glasses up the tanned bridge of her crooked nose, her eyes settled on JJ. He leant backwards in his chair, tipping precariously on its back legs. He looked the same as he always did when he came face to face with the Dean; a heather grey Coors t-shirt with the sleeves cut off draped over his shoulders—the emblem on the center of his shirt was problematic in itself—, navy blue cargo shorts hung relatively low from his hips, but not enough that he was showing anymore than anyone wanted to see, and his black combat boots left black treds on the tile flooring from the rubber soles. Tousled blond tendrils of hair were more or less disheveled than usual as they curled around his forehead, shading his cerulean eyes that were watching the Dean expectantly.

“Alright, Maybank. You’ve been absent the past week.” She picked up the file that was placed next to her closed laptop, a single piece of printer paper sticking out of the manila folder. her eyes scanned the corner of the paper, just soaking in the most surface level information as to why JJ Maybank was sitting in her office—again.

He nodded slightly, just barely dipping his chin in acknowledgement. “Yes, Ma’am. Do you wanna know—” JJ knew their conversation wouldn't last much longer. The Dean wanted him in and out. She had to mark that the student was in her office as part of her job description, but she didn't actually have to offer them advice or discipline.

“That’s enough. I’m sure this will happen again, just don’t be so obvious next time.” The Dean, who JJ knew by first name ( they were that well acquainted ), stood out of her chair to shoo the blond out of her small workspace she grew to call… her imaginative corner. The needy, shit-for-brains teenagers that were in and out of the place all day were ruining the “aura.”

“Pleasure doin’ business with ya, Ma’am.” JJ replied as he turned on his boot-clad heel through the doorway, only to come face-to-face with Rafe Cameron. Rafe Cameron, the Kook Prince in all his Ralph Lauren polo glory. It wasn’t that JJ was short—he wasn’t at six feet tall—, but Rafe had two inches of height up on him. Even in a metaphorical sense, Rafe seemingly always had the upper hand. Whether it was from a financial, familial, or even school performance standpoint.

So, with a pointed glare ( that was returned by Rafe ), JJ stepped through the doorway, eager to rid himself of the Cameron boy's presence before he threw a punch for no reason besides intuition.

The Dean looked up as JJ walked away, leaving Rafe to turn in towards the interior of the office, a smirk that was bound to stick on his face like a silly childhood white lie, pulling at the corner of his lips. “Rafe Cameron,” her scratchy voice drawled as she dropped her clipboard about a foot onto her desk, letting the clattering sound echo. Rafe didn’t bother with the formalities of sitting down, he, like JJ, knew he would be in and out before he could say the words, “Outer Banks.”

“I see we’re making these visits a weekly ritual.”

“Only so I can see you, Ma’am.” His smirk widened into a sarcastic grin. Despite being so, outlandishly different, Rafe and JJ were uncannily the same. Even in ways they wouldn’t be caught dead with another person knowing about. “Should I play our collection of Frank Ocean songs?”

“Very clever, Rage.” She exaggerated her calling him Rage, his name was so close to the word and the word described almost his entire personality. The Dean relished in the irony. She picked up another manila folder, flipping through the papers inside she looked back towards the boy with disdain. “Says here you snorted coke in the cafeteria?”

Rafe sighed, what it said was absolutely the truth, but he couldn’t get by without putting at least a little effort in. “I was joking, I was pretending to do a bump when it was just salt.”

“Salt?” The Dean walked towards Rafe ready to push him out of her office, although the snorting of coke started turning gears in her crude brain. “That had to burn going down didn’t it? Next time, do it in the bathroom. Now, adios!”

With an exaggerated eye roll, Rafe left the Dean’s office, where she was opening up her laptop once more, muttering to herself, “Snorting coke...high sex? Bump, sounds modern.”

. . .

In the heart of the quad, as the wind picked up, blowing the remnants of an oceanic breeze across the grounds of the high school, JJ fell into step with his best friend—John B. Neither had materials needed for class. John B had a piece of paper stuffed into the back pocket of his shorts, and JJ was going off maybe having a pen or pencil in the amalgam of beer bottle caps and the paper with which he handrolls his joints jingling in one of the various pockets in his cargo shorts. Groups of people stand in their own, small congregations. There are the basic beauts—the Kook girls and guys that have nothing going for them besides their looks. Their parents make good money, enough to stay on Figure Eight, the rich side of the island, but not enough for them to be extraordinary in any feat. There are the surfers; they are Cut’s pride and joy. They adorn their lockers with stickers and listen to reggae music in the halls. One of the only groups in school that intermingled between social classes, that is to say the only group that blurred the line between Kook and Pogue, are the stoners. Lots of smoking weed, but sometimes someone can rope in something stronger. Normally, it was cocaine, considering the expansive market for the drug in the Outer Banks.

John B and JJ found another one of their close friends, Pope. The three Pogues were in their own little world, talking amongst themselves about possible storms heading in that would create surges perfect to surf when Gracie Brooks and her best friend, Arianna Chavez passed them. JJ’s attention was immediately caught. He was like a fish and whenever he talked to Gracie, saw Gracie, hell, whenever he interacted with her in any way, he would take the bait on the fishing rod. She was like a magnet, albeit, she didn’t quite return his feelings.

Gracie is one of Figure Eight’s finest. Her mother split a few years ago, and neither Gracie, nor her older sister Kacey Brooks, have told anyone why. Steve Brooks—Kacey and Gracie’s father—is an obstetrician, and one of the very few on the island. That in itself racks in quite the salary for the two Kook princesses to spend.

“Oh, my God,” he whispered, as the two girls passed him.

Gracie continued to preach the differences between “like” and “love” via the analogy of her high-top Converse to her Doc Martens. Arianna nodded her head in agreement. While there was just something about Gracie, whether it be her cookie-cutter looking exterior in short dresses or her allusions to a deeper meaning behind her relationships with her shoes, there was also something about Arianna. Before she became best friends with Gracie, she was more outgoing, more talkative, more eloquent with her words, but Gracie’s influence changed that, and if the universe was any indication, it seldom sure that Arianna would revert back to her pre-Gracie self after her influence is gone.

“Dude, you know the rule.” John B said, tugging on JJ’s shoulder as the blond sixteen-year-old almost followed Gracie, like he couldn't help but just be pulled into her wake. It was true, JJ did know the rule. It was widely known that the Brooks sisters Do Not Date. In Kacey’s freshman year, the rule was widely condemned by the male population until halfway through the year something snapped. She was no longer just another Kook Princess with preppy sundresses and vintage Reeboks. Now, all the fuss was on Gracie. Every guy was vying for her attention. She simply relished in the attention, and all JJ could do was pine quietly until graduation. Or, he could meddle. There was always that.

tags: @perkily @mortifiedposts @poguequeen @abigailpankow @curlybrownhairedboys @steverogers123 @outerbankslut @jayjaymaebank @jjssarah @whOreforharry @wowitswondergurl @anonymous0writer @kodi8314 @outrbank @aestheticcraze @kylosleftbuttcheek @x-lulu @dailygrace06 @calswildflower95 @insanitysparkles @prejudic3 @ilovejjmaybank @apoguecalledjj @xxxxxxxxxxxxxooooooooooooo @calumbroutledge @rudys-pankow @bxllasanosa @write-from-the-heart @thelocalpogue @fandomsinapile @starkeymarkey @lovingxjj @beatement-l @drew-starkey @beckester @butgilinsky @kayak-huesgen

if your user is in italics then it didn't let me tag you—shoot me an ask or a pm if i typed it wrong or if tumblr is just bitching ✨

if you want to be tagged in the upcoming chapters for this series click here

[vesperstalksclones]

Whats this? A naughty story about REX??? 😱

(18 +) - be warned!!

Warnings: Graphic descriptions of sucking off a Vod. Im not blushing, you're blushing

Uses: cures boredom, loneliness, anxiety, and scratches that "itch"; helpful for all clone lovers, but especially those who are preoccupied (like me) with the idea of going down on one of our gorgeous troopers. 

Ingredients: a bit of deep throating, ample saliva, hair pulling, teasing, and lots of sweet sweet clone rod

A lil sumthin sumthin inspired by the glorious bunch of peeps that admin for and show up at clonesandmoans.

○○○○○○○○○○○

"On. Your. Knees." Fives postured, hands on his hips, trying his best to look as dignified as possible. 

Jesse burst out laughing and his friend's poor attempt to mimic their commanding officer. Amidst chuckles and heckling from the other clones, you sat chewing on your lip, trying to make sense of Fives' act.

I knew Rex as a stern commander, albeit he was thoughtful of his men. I'd never heard him speak with such a dominant and aggressive tone or issue orders in such a basic way. What was Fives on about?

"I don't get it…" 

Fives and Jesse glance up at the sound of your voice. They had become two of your best pals since coming on as a med tech three months ago. Torrent company was known for getting the job done, even if it meant getting blown up in the process. The result was a patient load in the med bay that often flooded in to the halls. The modest staff couldn't keep up, even with the support of the clone field medics. The call had come in for more hands, and yours had been chosen.

"Mph" Jesse grunted. "Umbara. A shit traitor named Krell. He did us pretty dirty; lost us a lot of brothers."

Fives chimed in "Rex took it pretty hard. He felt responsible as our CO. It was his decision to execute Krell. He said that; commanded him 'On Your Knees'. Now when he's pissed that's our tag line…." Fives ducked his head, glaring up from under his brows and growled out the words low in his throat. 

I swallowed hard. I couldn't deny that I had a thing for these men. They were fit and firm and strong. I had handled so many of these gorgeous tanned bodies since I'd reported to Torrent and It was a guilty hidden pleasure of mine. I was glad to save their lives and stitch up their wounds and soothe their fevers. The fact that they were built like every maiden's fantasy under that armour was a surprising and welcome bonus. 

And then there was the Captain. He always presented with an air of quiet dignity. Even when he professed worry for his injured troops, he always always remaind poised. Many of the other soldiers jumped at the chance to flirt with a young available female. Especially one who's job included removing their clothing and occasionally (if they were lucky) touching their twig and berries if necessary. Some, like Fives, were shameless in their chatter. He'd offered to service me several times. Honestly it didn't bother me, he was so sweet and silly and friendly about it, like an overly large puppy. That's how we became friends, as messed up as it seemed. He had offered to paint my molars. I politely declined and checked around his balls for herniations. Instant besties. 

 Rex had never had to present to me before. Apparently he preferred to report to his medic, Kix, for treatment. No, I had only ever traded injury reports and small talk with the commander. He was always perfectly poised. Focused. Buttoned up.

I wanted to unbutton him.

In the most depraved ways I could imagine. I wanted that decent, respectful man to use me like his play thing and leave my sticky, sweaty, and shaking.

Again… a dry swallow at the thought.

Fives cocked an eyebrow at me. 

"Hey uhh… Jess! Look at this shit!"

Jesse swung around, joining us. "Whats that Vod?"

Fives lowered himself to my eye level. He repeated the low growl, and had the heat rising in my cheeks. 

"You fekking like that don't you ad'ika??" Jesse snickered and ruffled my hair. 

Fives stroked his goatee. "Got a thing for the good Captain, do you Nurse? Well…"

"Kriffing… ugh! Fives stop!" I covered my face not sure if I was embarrassed or relieved that my friends had found me out.

I pushed him out of the way and scrambled up from the lounge chair. "I have to run! My rotation starts in 15! Jesse, Fives, … keep your mouths shut… or I'll order cavity searches on both of you!"

"Don't threaten us with a good time!"

                             ○○○○○○○○○○○○○

A few days had passed and I had all but forgotten the exchange with the boys. I was preforming an inventory in a satellite med station, counting off bandages, checking the use by dates on IV bags… important profoundly boring work. Footsteps echoed in the adjoining exam room, big and heavy. Looking to the door… there stood the captain… clad in his boots and blacks, arms crossed as he studied me.

I straightened and tidied myself. 

"Yes Captain?"

"It's come to my attention…" he thought for a moment, " some of my men think I make you uncomfortable."

Uh….

"I beg pardon? Not at all sir!" I crossed the room, intent on showing him that his presence was not unwelcome. "Whatever gave them that notion?"

"Apparently a discussion of my behavior in the field caused you visible discomfort…"

Fucking Fives. And. Jesse. They would die for this.

"No sir…" I thought back to Fives impression and couldn't help but flush from the thought. The real thing was standing an arms length away from me. And we were very alone. 

I stared into his amber eyes, the square stern set of his face. I imagined his full lips forming the words. Commanding me.To my knees.

The heat crept up my neck and into my cheeks. I couldn't look any longer without embarrassing myself.

"It seems to me ad'ika, that you are not being very truthful." His lilting accent filled my ears and I wished for… rougher.. words to be graced by it.

His thumb and fingers gripped my jaw, his palm pressed against my neck. He lifted my face and leaned close enough for me to feel his breath on my skin.

"It seems.." he continued, his rich velvety baritone came softly "...that you might appreciate it if I were to speak to you in a way that many would consider.…indecent."

I took a shuddering breath, my mouth falling open. With just that simple incantation my body caved entirely to his spell, and I felt tingling heat spread through my belly. 

What was happening??? Was this reality? Was Mr Duties and regulations coming on to me???

"What if I would? What would you do about that?" I whispered, testing the terrain.

"I'd certainly oblige." He replied, running his thumb across my bottom lip, "Anything to make you feel more at home."

"Just doing my job sir."

I was physically shaking with the need to grab hold of him."

"Anything to keep you in peak condition".

Oh God, that was terrible. I didn't dare speak anymore, afraid at how quickly my capacity for structured thought was deteriorating. 

I lept at him, pressing hungry lips to his, getting a tight grip at his shoulders.

Rex palmed my ass and lifted me easily, sitting my down roughly on the exam table all the while fighting for my tongue. He positively devoured me, pulling my chest tight against his, bending me backwards to accommodate his height.

"How do you like to be touched?" He gasped between kisses thrusting a hand under my shirt and spreading it across my navel.

"I'll like anything you do to me. Just use me Rex." It came out like an order more than a request. 

His lips quirked into a sly grin. He pulled my shirt over my head and quickly hooked my sports bra with his thumbs, dragging it up my arms. I expected it to be flung away as well, but at my elbows he made a deft twist of his wrist, and the garment tightened like a snare. One big hand pulled my arms backward, arching my torso so that my breasts stood up like lonely mountains before my chin. His opposite hand pressed to my rib cage, and crept around smoothly examining my flesh. He traced the bottoms of my breasts, then slowly closed over one as he watched my face. My jaw had dropped lower with each inch over movement and when his calloused thumb and forefinger teased my nipple to a harder pebble I loosed a groan. It was wanton and desperate and I knew he liked it because his smile showed his perfect teeth, right before they descended to the other breast. 

I couldn't help it but my eyes rolled back in my head. The feeling of his lips nibbling my bud, his teeth pinching, and his rough tongue teasing, combined with the opposite hand massaging was enough to put me out of my mind entirely. 

I uttered a deep moan as the heat of my lust spread through my veins. Sweat beaded on my forehead and my thighs shook a little with anticipation. 

"Do you like being at my mercy?" He whispered against my soft skin, the hand at my elbows tightened my "bonds" with a small adjustment of his finger. "I could do whatever I want to you… and you'd have to just watch."

 My eyes widened and I could feel my pupils dilate. I was eager to watch. 

His hand slid down my hip, then thrust underneath me and gripped the waist of my breeches. He hauled them down my thighs, then ducked and hooked my knees over his shoulder. 

"What if you aren't ready for me?" He whispered, his voice rough and gritty with arousal. He slid his free hand along the backs of my bare legs to where they met, tracing a finger along the fold of my sex.

I swallowed dryly, silently begging him to find out for himself. 

He slipped two large fingers within me, exploring the spaces near my opening, then upward to gently stroke at my clit. The action pushed a desperate whimper past my lips, and I tilted backwards, reveling in his touch. 

"No ma'am!" He chided, slapping me gently on the base of my rump. "You damn well better be paying attention, I don't appreciate being ignored."

He scowled, stepping away from my legs and hauling me roughly to my feet. 

"Generally, when I catch a trooper drifting off I have to make an example."

I trembled at the thought of his "punishment". 

He jerked at the twisted cloth that still held my arms, the other hand plastering me against him, his member pushing hard against my navel. 

"Drop."

I stared at him defiantly. His eyes glared down into mine. Danger and raw power pooling in their depths

"On. Your. Knees." 

I was defeated with little resistance. The command dripped with his dominance, and my weakness to it made itself known by conveniently running down my thigh.

"Yes sir," I rasped quietly. My mouth suddenly not dry anymore. He fucking new what I wanted. 

He loosened his grip on my arms, allowing the garment to slide free as I lowered myself before him. I clasped his thick thighs and guided him to turn and lean against the exam table. I pulled up the top of his black body glove, tracing my tongue over his abs. 

"Take it off," i whispered, "I want to look at you."

 The captain obeyed, rolling his bare shoulders and flexing his physique for my benefit and the view was splendid! My hand roamed with my eyes, up his rippling torso as high as I could reach and back down again, tracing the bronzed curves and inspecting a few ragged scars. He was a man built to be physical, compact muscle and sinew, wrapped in bronzed silk. My hands found the arch of his hips and hooked the waistband of his skin tight pants. Pulling them down slowly my eyes greedily devoured the V-shaped muscles that pointed the way to my "punishment". He was already sporting a raging erection, and I was forced to unhook him from the elastic before I could peel it away further down his thighs.

 His member arched upward before his belly, and without having touched him yet, I was already pretty confident that one of my hands couldn't close around him fully. By nature he was much darker than the rest of his skin, and his darker scrotum was drawn tightly, ready for work. 

He tapped me on the forehead with the spongy head. "Hey!" I giggled, pushing him away. 

"You're getting distracted down there! Get to it."

I cocked my head to the side, quirking an eyebrow up at him, keeping my eyes on his as I ran my tongue along his shaft, teasing at the vein underneath. He kept his face flat and stern, lips still pulled down in a scowl. 

Still watching, I repeated the long lick, but this time closed my lips over his head, tracing circles within my mouth. He twitched,  rolling his neck a bit, fighting to remain the dignified officer. 

I allowed my saliva to gather in my mouth, promising him mentally that I was going to put that military rank right in its grave. Perhaps he didn't know that caf was only my second favorite thing to put in my mouth. His punishment was my forte.

My lips crept slowly down his shaft, my tongue spreading saliva the entire way, preparing him for my attentions. I stopped about half way, and repeated the motion a few times. Sucking lightly with each retreat. He fidgeted with his jaw a few times. My hands circled his hips and gripped his hard ass, pulling his pelvis forward, while he remained leaning against the table. Watching intently, I descended along his cock again, my eyes holding his as innocently as I could manage. His own widened the deeper I took him, his lips finally dropping open with a gasp as he slid in to my throat and my lips pressed to his bronze skin. I swallowed against him, my tongue flitting about and drew away, savoring the deep groan that I was pulling out of him.

Gotcha captain.

I quickened my pace, not taking him as deeply, but sucking with force each time, my fingers clamped around his hips, arched into claws. Holding him prisoner. 

I would break away periodically, running my lips along the sides of his shaft, allowing his arousal to calm a little - no sense in hurrying him along. I wanted to savor this beautiful man.

His hand groped for my head, gently fisting my hair, the other finding my upper arm, kneeding and stroking as he drown in my touch. 

"Ah.. ah...ah'd...ddd..ikka".. he stuttered through his passion, when I took him again in my mouth. "Can you go harder??... GAH!"

He threw himself back as I scrubbed over his head with my tongue, toying with the small opening there. "I love your touch, Dala, its so good! I want to move but I'm afraid I'll hurt you!"

I surged forward down his cock, tearing another moan from his throat. Pulling away with a wet slurp, I met his gaze.

 "Well, do it then, sir. Aren't you the one punishing me?" I asked, stroking him firmly in my fist. 

He grinned, combing back a few escaped locks of my hair and closing his fingers through them firmly. Sliding my closed hand to the base of his member, I chased it with my mouth, tensing my neck and shoulders, the other hand traveling along his thigh to stroke between his legs, caressing the tightened globes there.

I repeated the motion again and again, varying in force and intensity, as the Captain's breath grew more ragged. Pushing him well past his limits, he began thrusting back in to my face, struggling to temper himself and not knock me senseless. The fist holding my hair would occassionally forget itself, hauling me away or forcing me forward when the pleasure got the better of him. I moved with him, savoring the taste of his skin, the salty warmth of the pre-cum that I was pulling out of him, the thrill of pleasuring this man with my mouth and hands. I had been hungry for him. Positively ravenous. And devour him I did. 

His moans were becoming louder and more frequent, with gasped praises and prayers flung from his lips at odd intervals. 

I sucked harder and moved faster, fighting my way towards his release. 

"Ngh!! Ad'ika! I'm close!" He cried. I met his eyes. "I want to… aagh!" he shuddered, loosing his train of thought momentarily. "I want to cum on your face!!!"

I couldn't very well nod, but unstead answered by putting my best effort in to the grand finale, tongue and mouth and hand working in unison to push him over the edge. 

His lashes fluttered shut, his head dropping backwards, Rex thrust against my mouth, a noise building in his chest. He repeated the motion with me. Again. On the fourth roll of his hips a shout tore from his throat, and I felt his hot seed pour over my tongue. I pulled away, allowing thick ropes of his cum to land on my cheeks and lips, down my neck and chest. 

I stroked his hips and thighs as he leaned back on his elbows, his climax rolling through him still. Sitting back on my heels, I simply enjoyed the sight, watching him in the afterglow of his release. He was still trembling, with the occasional violent shudder, breathing raggedly, his shaking hands kneeding at my wrists.

Eventually he lifted his head, fixing me with a bright eyed grin that made my insides positively twist. 

"Damn woman, that was intense!" He gasped, pulling me to my feet. He admired his handiwork on my chest. Then, with an impish grin, he signed off near my collar bone with his index finger, satisfied I had been properly chastized. 

"You ass!" I squealed dodging away. 

Laughing, he grabbed me and pulled me over to the sink. We quickly cleaned up together, and he pulled my breeches away along with socks and clogs. Snaking an arm around my waist, he dipped the other hand between my thighs, which was in quite a state: stimulation to my mouth tended to make me a hot mess. 

"Stars! Where is all of this coming from?" He nibbled at my lips, tasting himself in the process. 

"I guess its my punishment for not paying attention", I cooed saucily. "I suppose I'll have to tend to that elsewhere."

"Perish the thought, Sugar." He fisted himself, working his member as he kissed me again. "Give me a moment and I'll be in top form…" his voice dropped into the low growl that rattled my insides, " then we can continue with your…. Reprimand .."

He scooped me up, and dropped me unceremoniously back on to the table, pushing his already firm cock against my opening. 

"Your recovery time Rex, my God!" I gaped in wonder. He guided his member to my opening and sunk into me slowly, smiling at my low groan. 

"I've told your superior I need you to help me purge old injury reports. Should take the entire rest of the day..." He exhaled slowly, enjoying the delicious friction where we were joined. "... and I've a laundry list of poor behavior that needs to be "disciplined" out of you"

[iyliss]

have you been playing Duel Links much? What do you think of the new content?? Stay safe and take it easy!

Thanks a lot for sending an ask!! and for the nice words.I am technically safe if that’s anyone’s concern, but Im going through a quite terrible time. Probably gonna put it in the tags because it’s quite hard (at least for me) but it feels strange avoiding to say it. Anyone thanks for helping making me thing about something else. Im probably gonna talk a whole lot, sorry in advance. I started playing duel links when it launched. I remember it was when I was in new year holydays with my mom and her partner in a little place in the mountain we rented for a few days. It may sound silly but that’s one of the new year I remember the best. Just chilling near a fire with nice food and playing dl while it’s all silent. And I think I played it quite a bit at first? I was bad but trying. Soon enough they added Bakura too so like. I was all the more invested. But then i believe my interest in dm started to wear off, and I played less and less. Sometimes to grab an event character, quickly not at all. Got back to it when gx entered but I don’t think I was super there either. Like I stopped when i unlocked Edo and Asuka and that’s about it. I still came back when there was event for new characters and all. And then Saiou was leaked. I remember when it happened, I was at one friend place when I receive this from another friend and let me tell you I spend a good few hours just hitting the sofa i was on with my arm for how happy I was (my happiest stimming is like a hitting movement, and i prefer doing it on surface im sure i wont break. the only 3 time I remember doing it was for my birthday, here, and when we rewatched s2 with my friend). And yeah Saiou kind of made me get back into it real hard. I HAD to complete the whole event from day 1 to the end. Also they soon enough added darklords and fabled and well guess who had to make Levianing canon haha. Darklords were still so fun, playing it on dl really helped me understand how to play it IRL. I still can’t believe I unlocked every single thing about Saiou, all of his levels, all of his skills. I even played some ranked. Since then Ive been mostly playing for new content? This time with the added interest of dialogues between interesting characters, tag duel, and little content like this. I am even more doing it that my friend stopped playing so i kind of provide for the both of us. I started Zexal World, and I’ll probably try getting kotori and then go back to waiting for various event?

And yeah I am so happy to see Zexal world! I really can’t wait to have more content for them all, and also to reach later series and qldfjd rn there isn’t that much characters but I am very hyped for dialogues between all of them. Also also, o’brian is coming it’s nice!! i just hope they fix darklord bug cuz I am not really interested in playing any other deck (maybe I should actually try making a decent Arcana Force one?). Also thinking about what’s to come, I wonder what personnality they’ll give to Sora. Since it seems to stay as close to early canon as possible to avoid spoilers, i guess it’ll be his childish personnality but... I kinda want to see him more as his neutral later self in a non world-ending situation? I want to be sure he’s doing good ;w; Also please put Zone and Aporia I want them to talk even if it’ll be horrible.

Though I don’t think Ill go back to heavily play it until there is a character im really interested in. Maybe Astral on his own though I don’t super like his deck. For sure though, Ill max out Thomas, or Aporia since they should be the first one to come between the character Im really, really excited for. thought I also want to see Sherry for her dialogues with Aki. and Antinomy of course. And fubuki (hopefully not as darkness it’d be more fun). And for Zexal pretty much everyone would be awesome lol. Oh also. I have not hope but. I can’t help to imagine if they added 1) crossover dialogues (but of course none of my fav will be concerned im sure ;w;) 2) an unpossessed Saiou. probably s4. like i know it won’t happen but it’d be so damn nice. Like first of because FINALLY I can play a game without feeling like im entertaining the light and hurting Saiou. Second because saiou s4 is damn cool. Third because i want to see him interact and god imagine s4 saiou talking with Edo? ;w; And uh. uh. they didnt put all the arcana force yknow. okay i know i know, the world and the fool just won’t be good to put in a game like dl but.... and those non-used voicelines..... Anyway, thank you! I hope I wasnt too boring.

[horansqueen]

AM Conversations : chapter 15

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.2k. -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- IF YOU WANT TO BE NOTIFIED WHEN THIS IS UPDATED, I THOUGHT I COULD START A TAG LIST SO LET ME KNOW. IF YOU’D RATHER BE NOTICED IN PRIVATE, MESSAGE ME TOO PLEASE!

- THERE IS SMUT IN THIS CHAPTER. not a lot. and not super explicit, but just a fair warning.

- this is mostly about Liv and Harry. I hope you still enjoy.

-is this story getting boring? i really really need to know!

- thank you so much for all the asks i get. you guys make me so happy. i cant even explain. thank you forever. i love you!!!

-tbh idk what i think of this chapter meh im not super proud i admit :X

-please, message me, give me feedbacks, it would mean sooo much to me!

Chapter 15 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

When I woke up, I kept my eyes closed and reached out to find Niall but groaned when I realized I was alone. I didn't remember him trying to wake me up by shaking me or threatening me to do something embarrassing and I ended up thinking I must really have been out of it.

i tried to remember the whole conversation I had with Niall the night before and I shook my head with a sigh, my eyes still closed. I was an idiot. He looked good, he was sweet, and I had been so close to kiss him. That would have been an extremely stupid move. Not only would it ruin our friendship, but just a few hours before that, I was kissing Harry. It was a miracle I had initiated a first kiss, it would have been insane to think I could initiate a second one on the exact same night.

I rolled on myself, ending up in the middle of the bed, on my back, and my eyes fluttered open. I stared at the ceiling for a few minutes and finally forced myself out of bed. I was impatient to see Niall but nervous to see Harry. What were we supposed to tell each other? What did that kiss mean anyway? What was the next step? Knowing Harry, these were all useless questions. He was laid-back and never really bothered with labels. I was the total opposite. Everything was so much better when it was clear and said. Still, I didn't want to rush anything and I had no intention to have that kind of serious conversation with him 12 hours after our first kiss.

I took a quick shower and dressed up before brushing my teeth and rushing downstairs. The house was extremely quiet and I frowned, looking through every open door to find someone. I ended up in the kitchen and my heart skipped a beat when I saw Harry making food.

"What are you doing?" I asked with a frown, my lips curled into a smile. "Where is everyone?"

"Oh shit, I wanted to surprise you with breakfast in bed," he let out as toasts popped out of the toaster. "I guess it's ruined."

I raised my eyebrows and chuckled, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Well, I apologize."

"No, no!" he argued, shaking his head. "Should have worked a bit faster."

I watched him run around for a few more seconds and he finally put a full plate on the table, placing a very similar one right in front. I took a step closer as he showed me the chair with his hand. We both sat down and I leaned my chin on my hand, my elbow on the table.

"Are you trying to impress me with your cooking skills?" I asked with a smirk.

"Maybe, is it working?" he answered, his lips curling more.

"Maybe."

We started eating and I noticed how we kept glancing at each other. The nervousness I had felt earlier was gone but the thumping of my heart against my rib cage was still present. Perhaps I liked Harry more than I thought.

"So, why are we alone?" I asked after a few minutes of silence, looking up at him.

He did the same and chuckled, leaning against his chair and taking a sip of coffee.

"I sort of asked Niall to take everyone to the beach?" he admitted, scratching the back of his head.

He looked embarrassed and I liked it. I nodded slowly and tried to restrain a chuckle. I didn't even want to know how Niall reacted. I was a bit lost at the way he was acting recently. Sometimes, I felt like he wanted Harry and I to finally be together but some other times, I could swear he still thought Harry would break my heart. Either way, he was respecting his promise to not come between whatever Harry and I had and I was grateful for that.

"And besides breakfast in bed, what else did you have in mind?" I asked curiously, staring at him. "Or maybe you thought we'd stay in bed?"

This time, he laughed and I joined him. He pushed his plate away and took the last sip of his coffee before diving his gaze in mine again.

"Are you trying to get in my pants?"

I didn't answer but laughed and rolled my eyes. The truth was, I wouldn't be against some action. It's been so long since I felt someone's hands on me it was driving me insane. When we had kissed the night before, I could have sworn it had made my whole body throb. It anticipated what could happen and I felt like I disappointed it by not going further. Is that even possible? To disappoint your own body and mind?

"When's the last time you had sex, Harry?" I asked daringly, raising my eyebrows.

My questions surprised it at first and his eyes got bigger but after a few seconds, his lips curled again and he laughed.

"You're really one of a kind." he pointed out, licking his lips. "I don't know, I'm pretty sure I met someone when the tour started?"

I thought he knew how straight forward I was by then but apparently, I could still startle him. Even Niall was surprised by my behavior sometimes, so I didn't think anything bad of it.

"Are you trying to tell me you didn't get into anyone's pants since the tour started?"

"I wanted to but every time I could have, I preferred to stay at the hotel or in the tour bus with a cute brunette who chokes on jello."

"I'm never gonna get out of this one, will I?"

He laughed again and shook his head, moving closer to the table and intertwining his fingers, his hands on the table.

"No, you won't." he pointed out. "You want to know why?"

Every time Harry talked, I was curious to find out what he was going to say next. He knew how to make me smile, he knew how to make me melt, and with an other glance at his hands, I was pretty sure he knew how to make me cum.

"Why?" I wondered, raising my eyebrows as I tried to stop thinking about specific parts of his body.

"Because that's when I realized how much I liked you." he explained, the right corner of his lips curling fondly. "I mean I knew I liked you, I knew I wanted to kiss you, but on that night?" He shrugged. "I don't know, I realized it was more than a stupid little crush. It was more than infatuation. It was stronger."

The traits of my face softened quickly at his words. I was not even sure I deserved this, I was not sure I deserved him, and I felt extremely selfish because I knew I was going to go for it even if my mind was telling me not to. I was going to spend time with Harry, get to know him even better, and maybe even go further.

"You know exactly what to say and when to say it." I just pointed out in a whisper. "Maybe we should go in bed right now."

This time, a loud laughter boomed out of him and the way he closed his eyes was endearing. I stared at the cute crinkles on the corners of his eyes and my gaze traveled down to his perfect lips and straight teeth. Why did a guy so fucking perfect had feelings for someone plain and boring like me? I knew physical appearance was not a criteria, or at least I knew it was less and less important the older you get, but someone like Harry could get anyone. I was pretty sure there were many girls out there who would be a thousand times prettier, smarter and funnier. There were a thousand girls out there who had an amazing personality along with a perfect body. Why was Harry losing his time on me?

"We should go to the lake instead, what do you think?"

I chuckled and nodded, grabbing my mug and taking a sip of my cold coffee to hide the redness of my cheeks.

"Why did you ask me about the last time I had sex?" he questioned after a while. "Are you scared I cheated on you?"

I rolled my eyes again but shook my head.

"No, silly. Even if you had, it clearly wouldn't be cheating." I explained with a shrug. "I just asked because I haven't had sex in so long I can't remember when it happened last."

"That's... impossible. And sad. I mean, how can you not remember?"

If I racked my brain, I thought it was probably with the last person I dated but I just grimaced and shrugged again. It was not worth trying to remember, I was sure about it.

"Maybe I just don't want to."

"I can definitely understand that." He chuckled and nodded. "Okay, go get prepared, I'll clean a bit and we can leave."

He got up and I did the same quickly, walking to him and putting my hands on his shoulders. He had our two plates in hands and I just got on my tiptoes again to kiss him. I didn't make the kiss grow but I closed my eyes, feeling the softness of his lips against mine.

"Unfair." he breathed when I moved back from a few inches. "You did that when both my hands were busy."

I laughed and moved back down on my feet, raising my nose a bit.

"You can use your hands later, Harry."

                                                         ---

I dropped my stuff on the dark sand, putting my phone on my towel and letting my eyes roam on the lake as soon as we got there. Harry stood next to me but quickly took his shirt off, sending me an amused smile. I tried to keep my eyes up into his but ended up glancing down at his chest, making him laugh.

"It's a bit unfair, you know?" he asked jokingly with an other chuckle. "You keep this shirt on but I'm dying to see you without it."

I felt both my cheeks turn a soft shade of red and cleared my throat looking away. I was so insecure about my body that even being in a swimsuit bothered me, and somehow, I was sure he could tell. We both knew I was nothing like the girls he usually hangs out with, even less the girls he dates, and i tried to push away the thought that crawled evilly in my head. What if this was all a big fat joke? Or worse, what if he pitied me enough to give me that kind of attention, at least for a while?

"Are you scared of what i'll think of you?" he asked with a small frown, looking concerned. "Because you really don't have to."

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, taking a step closer to the lake until my toes were in the water. How could I explain this to him without sounding desperate for compliments?

"All the girls here look amazing, I mean, have you seen Maya?" I just asked rhetorically, raising my eyebrows but still avoiding his gaze. "All the girls you've been with are models, Harry. I'm not stupid and I read gossips."

We remained silent for a few minutes and i held my breath when I saw him move from the corner of my eyes. He stopped behind me and he was so close I could feel the warmth of his body on mine, making my heartbeats accelerate. Gently, he brought his hands to my shoulders and lets his fingertips brush on the skin of my arms. I felt goosebumps appear on my skin but tried to remain motionless. One of his hands moved back slowly, pushing  my hair over one of my shoulders and I felt his breath on my neck.

"You don't have to take it off if you don't want to." he whispered, his lips barely touching my neck. "But I promise I love all of you."

I knew the word was random but I felt my whole body stiffen when he said 'love'. We were far from reaching that stage but I just kept quiet and licked my lips, keeping my bottom one between my teeth. He trailed kisses on my neck and my eyes fluttered close as I tilted my head to give him better access. I hadn't been touched in so long, whether it was sexually or romantically, and I was craving his touch more than I wanted to admit.

"Tell me if you want me to stop." he breathed close to my ear again.

I nodded and felt his arms wrap loosely around me. I sucked my belly in when his hands slipped under my shirt and all I could think about was that he was used to flat stomachs and firm bodies. When was the last time I actually exercised? Months ago, probably?

"Please, relax." he let out in a murmur. "You're perfect."

I felt his hands move up again and reach my breasts, bringing an intense throbbing between my legs. It was sad but I could already feel myself get excited and I cursed at myself mentally for that while I shut my eyes tighter.

"Do you know how many times I thought about touching you?"

His voice was slightly huskier and my lips parted at the sound. I didn't know where to focus anymore and when he reached up for the straps of my bathing suit, I knew I was fucked.

"You're not gonna fuck me here, Harry, are you?"

He chuckled low and I felt him shake his head.

"No, I just want to touch you."

I felt his fingertips run on my breasts and stop on my nipples and he took a step closer. He was so close I could feel his half-hard cock rub slightly and gently against my ass and it made me swallow hard. I hadn't touched myself since... since Niall caught me. My eyes opened suddenly and I glanced at my phone, moving slightly in Harry's arms.

"Do you want me to stop?" he asked as his hands stopped moving over me.

I tried not to think about my best friend and I finally turned around, feeling his hands slip out of my shirt. I pushed my hair behind my shoulders and took a step back, sending him a smile.

"I think we should swim a bit."

He sent me an amused smile and shook his head as I chuckled.

"You're rare, Olivia." he let out loud enough to be sure i'd hear. "You know that, right?"

I laughed again and shrugged, turning around and getting completely in the water, immersing my head for a few seconds as I tried to calm the beatings of my heart. I liked Harry, then why did I always end up thinking about Niall? After all, I stood no chance with him while Harry was ready to let me in and give me a chance. A chance I was not sure I deserved.

When I got my head out to get air, I noticed Harry very close to me. He smiled at me fondly and pulled me closer. I expected the kiss as his warm lips pressed on mine and slowly, I brought my arms around his neck and felt his hands on my back, over my shirt.

"You know that half my bathing suit is just... hanging down." I pointed out as I laughed against his mouth. "Fortunately, I have a shirt."

"Or unfortunately, depends who you ask." he replied as we both laughed. "You can always just take it off. Ever been skinny dipping?"

I moved my face away slightly and shook my head.

"No!" I let out a bit too loud. "You remember we kissed for the first time yesterday, right?"

He sent me a smirk and shrugged.

"Would you rather take your time?"

My smile faltered a bit and finally turned into a loving one. I licked my lips and brought them back on his, wrapping my arms tighter around his neck. I could feel his wet hair tickle my shoulders and neck and I loved it.

"No." I admitted in a whisper after a few more kisses. "In fact, I want all this to go quicker."

He laughed a bit against my mouth and his pulled me closer, hugging me against his body.

"That can be arranged."

He brought me out of the water, still kissing me deeply, and I noticed our height difference when my feet met the sand again. i felt his lips detach from mine slowly and I groaned low, making him laugh.

"Are you always impatient like that?" he wondered, placing a towel around me , making sure it covered all of me before rubbing his hands on my arms to warm me.

"No."

My answer made his lips curl more and he held out his hand for me. I stared at it a few seconds before slipping my fingers in it. When he squeezed my hand in his and pulled on my arm to incite me to follow him, I felt my heart skip a beat.

"I'm special, then?" he questioned, glancing at me, as we walked back to the lodge.

"Perhaps."

I felt like the walk back took an eternity but when he closed the sliding door behind us, I brought my shoulders closer to my face, keeping the towel around my body. The AC was on and I shivered a few times.

"I think I'll go take a hot shower." I just said, sending him a small smile.

I left the bathroom's door open and he waited for me, sitting on the bed, as I tried to warm myself under the hot stream of water. I held myself against the wall and allowed myself to think about Niall and wondered what he was doing.

I got out and looked at the clothes I brought with me intensely and for a while. I was torn between dressing up completely or partially and I could feel my heartbeats throb all over my body. I was nervous and scared but I wanted this and I knew I would regret it if I didn't do it. There was nothing worse than regretting not doing something. I decided to just wear my panties and a dry shirt and breathed in deeply before getting back in the room. Harry looked up and his lips curled immediately at my sight. I liked the feeling and I took a few steps closer, stopping right in front of him. He looked up at me and we stared at each other for a few seconds.

"You have no idea how bad I wanted to join you."

His words made me smile and slowly, I put one of my knees on the bed next to his thigh before doing the same with the other, straddling him. I brought my hands up to cup his face and kissed him deeply. I felt his fingers graze my naked thighs and whimpered low in his mouth.

"I wouldn't have minded." I confessed in a breath, letting one of my hands slip in his hair.

He tasted just as good as the day before and his lips were sweet, the taste of caramel still lingering on his tongue, and I ended up thinking that I would be fine with tasting this all my life. The thought scared me and excited me at the same time, making my heart jump so high in my chest that I felt it in my throat.

I gripped the back of his shirt and pulled it over his head with difficulty. I thought it would make him laugh but he looked up at me and his eyes roamed on my face. I felt slightly anxious but I didn't move as I watched his lips part slightly.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked softly, placing his warm palms on my thighs. "We can wait you know, as long as you want."

"I really don't want to wait." I said without hesitation, feeling my heart beat harder.

My heart swelled and I had to swallow the lump in my throat when his hands reached for the bottom of my shirt. I tried to concentrate on the skin of his chest and the form of his tattoos but all i could think about was his hands bringing my shirt up slowly and the way his impatient eyes ran on me. My shirt ended up on the floor and I held my breath again when his hands brushed slowly on my sides.

"Fuck."

He pushed my hair gently over my shoulders and let his hands travel down to my breasts again.

"Why didn't we do this before?" he whispered mostly to himself.

My lips curled a bit on the left, remembering that I had asked myself the same question when we had kissed the night before. After all, I had the right to be happy, didn't I? And trying to make things work with Harry was a step closer to my happiness, or at least, something that seemed pretty close to that. 

I bent down to kiss him again and he immediately parted my lips to kiss me deeper. He pulled me closer and turned us around as I chuckled again his lips and ended up under him, spreading my legs to give him more space. I could feel him getting harder as I moaned in his mouth and his lips ran down my neck, making me shut my eyes tight as he ground down on me, noticing just then that he had changed his wet bathing suit for a pair of dry shorts. There was nothing I wanted more at this exact moment than for him to take them off but I gripped the sheets on the bed with one hand while the other slipped in his hair again.

I felt both his hands slip down my waist as two fingers moved on the sides of my panties, pulling them down so slowly I thought it would never end. He moved up on his knees, his body still close to mine, and I pushed my panties away with my feet as he laughed against my mouth, probably at how impatient I was.

"We have all day, no rush." he pointed out, grabbing my upper lip between his and sucking gently on it while his hand slipped between my legs.

"Oh. Oh god."

I shut my eyes tight and arched my back despite myself as two of his fingers slipped on my slit before sliding inside me. My grip on his hair tightened and I bucked my hips in an attempt to feel his fingers deeper.

"It's been way too long." I repeated again.

My eyes shot open and I held my breath when his thumb rubbed on my clit a few times. I knew he could read how desperate I was just by looking in my eyes but he didn't smirk. He just looked at me as his fingers slipped in and out of me, slowly at first and quicker after a while, his thumb still brushing skillfully on my clit, not skipping a beat.

"Harry, if you don't stop i'm gonna..."

"Don't hold it."

I felt a rush to my brain as an orgasm hit me hard, shaking my body beneath him. I would feel embarrassed to reach my high so quickly if I wasn't busy enjoying the incredible feeling invading my whole body. I kept my eyes closed but felt my pupil flutter behind my eyelids as a comfortable warmth spread all over my body.

His lips reached mine again and i smiled, kissing him back. I thought he would want to keep going but he finally moved away and sent me a fond smile, brushing his nose a few times against mine, giving me an eskimo kiss.

"Are you hungry?" he asked, sitting up and passing his hand in his hair. "I could use a snack."

I looked at him with surprise as he bent down to grab something on the floor and hand it to me, holding it with two of his fingers. I smiled shyly when I noticed it was his shirt and took it. As I put it on, it reminded me that I still had some of his clothes that he let me borrow on the last day of tour and I would have to bring them back to him. This shirt, though, had no holes and it smelled like him. I fucking loved it and I felt myself blush at that thought.

"I thought you'd want to..." I didn't finish my sentence and just chuckled, shaking my head and pressing my lips together.

"I told you." he just said in a low tone, moving closer and pressing his lips firmly on mine. "We have all day."

[enbyleighlines]

Modern au drabble prompt - some sort of family celebration with the 'jin' sibs? I really liked the idea of them getting to grow up together in this version (no im not still crying over how they all ended in canon sssshhhhhh)

Absolutely! I would be delighted to write about the Jin siblings!

I also am always crying over how they ended up in canon! I just want good things for all of them! Jin Zixuan, especially, deserves all the love

I hope you enjoy this little Jin sib drabble~

—

Tonight, the Ouyang-Meng-Luo-Mo family is hosting a graduation celebration. More specifically, they’re celebrating Mo Hou earning a two-year university degree. At age 16, she had gotten pregnant, dropped out of high school, and got kicked out of her home, only to be taken in by her abusive older half-sister.

Now, seven years later, Mo Hou is celebrating her triumph over all the tragedies of her past. It involves a lot of wine and karaoke, and other things that thirteen-year-old Jin Zixuan doesn’t quite understand the appeal of.

This is why he is hunkered in the next room over, with his three siblings, and the three Jiang siblings.

They’re attempting to play a game of monopoly. It’s a little hard to concentrate, though, with all the whooping and hollering going on in the living room.

Still, there’s something comforting about the routine. The seven of them have become their own entity over the course of the last three years, like a street gang of child hooligans, but for the suburbs.

Jin Zixuan is the leader, although he’s only the second oldest. Jiang Yanli, who is the actual oldest, allows him to be in charge, because she has a crush on him.

Third oldest is Wei Wuxian, Jiang Yanli’s adoptive brother. Only five days younger is Jiang Cheng, Jiang Yanli’s brother by blood. Both of the boys are twelve, the same age as Meng Yao, Jin Zixuan’s first half-brother.

Second youngest is eleven year old Qin Su, Jin Zixuan’s half-sister. And last is little Mo Xuanyu, Jin Zixuan’s second half- brother, who is only nine.

Jiang Yanli is keeping track of the rules and the paper money.

Jin Zixuan is winning. It’s not like he has tough competition. Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng are playing as one team, and they keep making risky decisions that come back to bite them in the butt. Meng Yao and Qin Su make up another team, and they’re not taking any risks at all.

Mo Xuanyu is also technically on Jin Zixuan’s team, but he isn’t contributing anything to the game. He just silently clings to Jin Zixuan’s side like a baby koala.

After being sent to jail for a third time, Jiang Cheng loses his infamous temper. He attempts to throw his team’s stack of money down at the board, which only causes it to scatter every which way. “This game sucks,” he snaps, “Let’s play something else!”

“A-Cheng,” Jiang Yanli chastises, “There’s no reason to make a mess.”

“You’re such a sore loser,” Jin Zixuan says to Jiang Cheng, and then to Jiang Yanli, “You baby him too much.”

Both Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian bristle at that, equally offended.

Qin Su is already moving to tidy up the mess of papers. She hums as she works, a habit of stress masquerading as ditziness. “It’s okay,” she assures everyone, “It’s just a game. I was getting bored, anyway.”

“Always playing the peacemaker, A-Su,” Meng Yao teases, but he moves to help her sort the paper bills.

But Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian, ever the spoiled little brats, aren’t mollified.

“You think Jiejie babies us too much?” Jiang Cheng asks, in a low, threatening tone. “Or do you just not understand how being an older sibling works?”

“Jiang Cheng!” Yanli gasps.

Hot blood fills Jin Zixuan’s face. Unexpectedly, Jiang Cheng has hit something of a sore spot for him. He finds himself standing up.

Mo Xuanyu retreats, pressing closer to Meng Yao.

“That’s real mature,” Jin Zixuan says, “making fun of my family situation.” He feels the beginning of tears prickle his eyes, but he blinks them away. “How dare you.”

“A-Cheng, apologize!”

Jiang Cheng does not apologize. He gets to his own feet. “I wasn’t making fun of your family situation,” he doubles down, “I’m saying that you don’t know anything about being an oldest sibling!”

“Jiang Cheng has a point,” Wei Wuxian puts in, always coming to his adoptive brother’s side, “If Jiejie babies us, it’s only because she loves us!”

“Okay, okay, that’s enough,” Jiang Yanli desperately tries to calm everyone down.

“Are you saying I don’t love my siblings?” The words leave Jin Zixuan’s mouth before he can think them through. “Just— just because I don’t treat them like babies?”

“What’s going on in there?”

That comes from Yu Ziyuan, the Jiang siblings’s mother. She’s standing in the doorway, glowering in at all of them. Her rage does not discriminate between innocent and guilty, does not give a damn about “who started it”.

Everyone falls silent under her watchful eyes.

The silence is Yu Ziyuan’s desired reaction. She quirks a small, satisfied smile and says, “Good. That’s what I like to hear.” And then she leaves to rejoin the party.

But Jin Zixuan is still hurting. He gives the monopoly board a kick and rushes off down the hall towards his room.

Once there, he slams the door and throws himself onto his bed. He can’t stop the floodgates this time. Tears and snot gush liberally from his face as he sobs as hard as he can without making noise.

He can’t let the Jiang brothers hear him. They’ll never stop teasing him if they find out he’s crying like a baby.

It’s not his fault, he thinks to himself. He’s only been an oldest sibling for four years. Before then, he was an only child. Why should he know how being a sibling works?

But even to himself, it just sounds like a lame excuse. Meng Yao, Qin Su, and Mo Xuanyu are all in the same boat, but they all act like they’ve been siblings since birth. They like each other. They already have nicknames for each other, like A-Su, Yu-er, Er-gege, and A-jie.

Jin Zixuan presses his palms to his eyes and heaves noiseless, wet breaths into his bed sheets.

Maybe Jiang Cheng is right, he thinks. Maybe he isn’t meant to be an oldest sibling. Maybe he doesn’t know what that means. Maybe... maybe his siblings don’t even like him.

Jin Zixuan is only barely calming down when, ten minutes later, there is a tentative knock at his door.

Oh great, Jin Zixuan thinks. That must be Jiang Yanli.

She’s such a silly girl, with such an annoying, obvious crush. It gives Jin Zixuan second-hand embarrassment whenever he talks to her. It’s the last thing he needs.

But then a voice speaks through the door, and it’s not Jiang Yanli’s voice.

“Zixuan? Zixuan, can we come in?”

The voice belongs to Meng Yao, of all people. And... did he say ‘we’?

“Who’s we?” Jin Zixuan demands.

“Me, and A-Su, and Yu-er,” Meng Yao replies, “Just us three.”

His three siblings. Jin Zixuan hurriedly wipes his face dry on a pillow, and then tosses the soiled pillow aside. He sits on the edge of the bed, and steels his expression. “Come in.”

Meng Yao opens the door, and Qin Su and Mo Xuanyu rush forward. They both leap up onto Jin Zixuan’s bed, and huddle up close on either side, sandwiching him.

“You’re not a bad Da-gege,” Qin Su speaks first, “Jiang Cheng was wrong to say you’re a bad big sibling.”

Jin Zixuan freezes at the term. Qin Su usually only ever uses it at her mother’s insistence. Usually, he’s just plain old Jin Zixuan to her. Maybe ‘Zixuan’ by itself, if he’s lucky.

The sudden fear that Qin Su is being inauthentic crawls up Jin Zixuan’s spine. He pushes her away, but softly. “Since when do you call me ‘Da-gege’?”

Meng Yao heaves a great big sigh. “See, this is what Jiang Cheng meant.”

Jin Zixuan freezes. Meng Yao is usually so polite, that this sudden accusation throws him off guard. “What did you say?”

“I said Jiang Cheng was right,” Meng Yao repeats in no uncertain terms, “You don’t know how to be the oldest sibling. Your Meimei just called you Da-gege, and you push her away.”

“She didn’t mean it,” Jin Zixuan accuses.

“Yes, I did!” Qin Su actually sounds angry for once. “It’s just... you always look so mad when I call you that!”

“Me, too.” That comes from little Mo Xuanyu, who, even at the age of nine, rarely speaks. He’s a strange boy, even stranger than the ever-cheerful Qin Su or the eerily intelligent Meng Yao.

“Huh?” Jin Zixuan asks dumbly.

“I want you call you Da-gege,” Mo Xuanyu answers, mumbling as per usual.

“You... want to call me Da-gege?” Jin Zixuan looks from Mo Xuanyu to Qin Su. It sounds too good to be true. Surely they were just saying it to avoid angering their mothers, who are always afraid of being seen as a broken family.

But Meng Yao shares a different way of looking at things. “Why wouldn’t they?” He asks, “Aren’t you our Da-gege?”

Jin Zixuan scowls, but he doesn’t reply. He feels like he’s been put in his place, and he doesn’t like it. At the same time, though, he feels... happy. He’s happy to think that maybe his siblings actually DO like him.

“You can call me A-Su, if you want,” Qin Su adds, “or... at least call me Meimei!”

That last request hits Jin Zixuan like an electric shock. He stares at Qin Su. A thought enters his head for the first time. All this time, he’s been afraid that his siblings secretly don’t like him. Is it possible that they have been having the same doubts about him?

Jin Zixuan takes in a deep breath, and forces himself not to tear up again. “Okay,” he says, “I’ll... I’ll call you A-Su from now on.”

“And me!” Mo Xuanyu pleads, grabbing onto his arm and tugging. “Call me Yu-er!”

“Okay,” Jin Zixuan says, dazed, “Yu-er.”

Mo Xuanyu beams, showing off his missing front teeth. He lost them a couple of days ago after running into a tree, playing tag with Qin Su. It somehow makes him look more like himself, in a weird way.

“And you can call me whatever you want to call me,” Meng Yao pipes in, “I would like to call you Da-ge, myself.”

Jin Zixuan watches Meng Yao, taken aback. But he is often confused by the things that Meng Yao says. They are exactly one year apart in age, as they share the same birthday. But Meng Yao seems older, somehow, like he was meant to be born first.

“You should call him A-Yao,” Qin Su suggests, “That’s what his Mama calls him.”

“Only if he wants to,” Meng Yao insists.

Jin Zixuan is speechless for a moment. His throat is tightening, making it harder to breathe. He wants to say: Yes, of course I want to! But that would be childish, and Jin Zixuan is the oldest. He has to be a good example.

“I’ll call you A-Yao from now on,” Jin Zixuan decides.

Meng Yao smiles and nods his head once, in a strangely formal sort of way. “I would like that very much, Da-ge,” he replies.

Man, his siblings are so weird! Jin Zixuan looks from one to the other.

A-Yao acts so stiff, like he’s got the personality of an old man, wise beyond his years. A-Su is too quirky, too joyful, like she’s afraid the world will end if she allows herself to be sad for even a second. And little Yu-er is weirdly quiet, but clumsy, like he’s still learning how to walk.

Jin Zixuan isn’t mature enough yet to realize that their oddities come from trauma. He just knows that they’re strange, but they’re his, and he loves them.

So he gathers Qin Su and Mo Xuanyu closer, just for a moment, just to indulge in a quick thank-you hug.

And Meng Yao surprises Jin Zixuan yet again by stepping forward, and putting his arms around all of them. He buries his face into Qin Su’s hair, avoiding eye contact as he squeezes them all affectionately.

It’s not until later that Jin Zixuan figures out that Jiang Yanli encouraged his siblings to come and talk with him. That she always saw through his prideful outer skin, to the insecurities hidden below. She’s the one who explained to his siblings that they needed to make their thoughts and feelings obvious, in order to get them through his thick skull.

By that point, Jin Zixuan is in love with her. But that doesn’t happen until much later.

[divine-identite]

Shipping Info Meme

Answer the following for your muse so people know how shipping works on your blog.

Oh boy, this is going to be wordy. Placing this under a read more.

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER?:

I have like a few in terms of Romantic. My Caius, branching into canon and uncanon:

-  Caius and Yeul: Not romantically, familial PLATONIC - my boy is not a map, do not confuse this shit as romantic. I enjoy this ship because there will only be a few times you get to see Caius be gentle. Understanding and protective of Yeul. Sadly I don't have a Yeul to do longterm plotting on what could be so I don't sadly get to flesh out what could be with the characters. So the ship has ended but still a fave.

- Caius and Moana: Another familial platonic. Another huge ship I've had on my blog for like a year or two, it’s not hugely advertised but something you’ll see on my blog. Now I and the mun have already talked about the prospects of this ship and how amazing it will be. Caius being like a secondary dad, who trains and prepares Moana seemingly boring things, but pays off in the end.  Watching as she grows up, maturing into a woman and later into a chief. It’s like watching your garden just grow into a fabulous array of colours of vivid beauty, swirling into a radiant cosmos beyond the blackness betwixt stars. Im, sure there will be fluff and a lot of angst into this though. But I think Caius would be proud but at the same time at peace seeing her grow up. Though it's amusing she hit him with a paddle though lol. But still the mun/ muse are a complete gourmet coffee ( equivalent to cinnamon); made from the finest ingredients, warmed to delightful temperature and quite welcomed at any time of the day. To this ii’ll add @blessedbycrystal and @indrikis as well @oceanschiild

- Caius and Fujin:  Ah yes the potato and eggplant curry. I and the mun have completely made so many routes, alternatives and main that we wish to explore. Even work extensively on the development of the characters, marking down all fluff and angst, anything between. We plotted heavily made headcanons on our ships that we’ve now plotted and every now and then would publish lol ( i know it's my turn to make something lol). The soulmate AU is probably the longest au we’ve had for like 3 -4 years now? and then we’ve decided to release a Pacific Rim AU we’ve cooked up. Another amusing factor is that none of the characters did like another - at all by any means when we started it. It was just insane indifferent between the other like, whatever let's keep this moving, don't know don't care - how they're pretty invested in another now is quite amusing. So much how its funny how to stoic people interact with another is quite interesting. @fujxn

- Caiu and Alex:  We’ve sunk so much time into this ship. Despite the opposite personalities they’ve become a long way actually until now and made a lot of progress. So far its been under the opposites attract rule so far quite a lot of silliness involved lol but it works well with what is given with the ship. A lof cat beats person up, and also dealing with Alex’s episode of insomnia as well! You’ll probably find a lot of cooking to be more involved with this ship than any other ones I feel since you may end up seeing them owning a cooking store. @blessedfate

- Caius and Kuvira:  PROBABLY A BAD SHIP XD not bad as in bad - but Kuvira is just so salty and unyielding. Though the hate is subtly dying down thus far but Kuvira still - well going to be kuvira. The ship is a slow burner but I and the mun have talked extensively about the ship. Though kuvira still does throw rocks at him - and to this day still tries her best to man-handle him despite him literally towering over her all the time. The crack episode between the two is great and you can tell that despite some of the vitriol - there is some fun. All the hate is just one sided on Kuvira’s side and Caius either doesn't care or doesn't know, which might explain is indifferent. Thought I think this may be why its just hard to make him into an enemy when he doesn't see you worth holding a grudge on really. When it comes between who is the queen of pettiness; between all my ships I think I’ll crown Kuvira for this one lol. @thegreatunxter

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO WRITE WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?

Anything. Relationships aren’t static, people’s lives have dynamic changes and events that influence their behaviour on a regular basis. I am a huge fan of exploring the development of the bond they have. Come at me with domestic events, angst, supporting each other through trouble, courting, you name it.

I’m open to anything. Relations are especially hard to get, familial takes time to build up to but I suggest long as the ship is dynamic than it’ll work just fine - coupled with chemistry on both sides. I am quite open to exploration of any angle, angst, fluff and anything in between.

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?

Strongly prefer in the 20′s + I know 18 is like you’re a legal status, however, my muse is immortal. Your muse practically will be dating an ancient relict from the past, or some old bottled wine that’s aged wonderfully. 

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?

Yes with romantic, no isues with platonic. Let this be hewn into your minds.  Caius isn't mean for everyone. There is a lot of issues involving Caius that I've heard and aware - he’s slow to open up, he's cold, he doesn't act like he likes this person, he acts heartless and many more. It’s a list really and probably won't express this. If you are coming with these expectations of my muse, he is not for you. If you want something fast and simple relationship between the two - he’s just not for you in that matter. He’s a man that’s been through a lot and probably very slow of just opening up to people.

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW?

Moment clothes come off or when touching goes elsewhere. However, if its kept fade to black then that is fine.

WHO ARE OTHER THE CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?

I don't really have many romantics for Caius like that anymore but I guess; Caius/ Light ( my interest in Cairai is meh after 5 years) Caius/ Fang (not as bad as Cairai but its okay).

In terms of Platonic,  anyone really - Caius even extends his hand to welcome you.

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?:

Yes, I would greatly prefer you bring this to many attention so we can talk about it and what not. That and give you details so we can disillusion any expectations and come to a realistic circumstance. That or normally just AU’s.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?

Not as much as you would think really, I usually do some looking into before I seal the deal. That and im not so hyperactive due to work so - im just a ghost somewhat lol.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?:

Depends really, if something is convincing and has me enjoying it’s possible I could become ship obsessed.  But now these days Nah not so much, maybe I was more prone to like a few years back now.

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?

Of course, im open to anything just as you should have your own parents. I only ask if there is an issue you bring up to me. I thought I would be doing single ship - hmmm haven't found a person I could rest my laurels on like that really, That and im slow in responses now these days.

WHAT IS/ARE YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP(S) IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?:

Garnet/ Zidane, Yuna/Tidus, I do like 9S/2B as well very good combo. All I could think of that interested me

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?:

Ask

Tagged by: @asouldivided  , Moonpie guy

Tagging: anyone really

[nvr-pass]

actually re: my tags on my previous post bc i remembered this is my blog and i can monologue about whatever pretentious shit i want. i think part of my bewilderment at these people is bc my media behaviour is so antithetical to this happening. here's an essay or w/e ..

basically, i read blake snyder's save the cat a couple years ago (interesting, if you read it with a huge grain of salt) and he talks about the importance of taglines. he's says that people will only decide to see your movie based on a single sentence and poster the cinema/magazine provides about your movie, so it's important to make sure to communicate your hook and set up the correct expectations in your audience in just that little impression they will get. that's what they will decide on to see your movie and that's what will dictate how the think about it beginning to end.

synder's only thinking in the specific milieu and time he wrote his screenplays for, but i think he was onto something with the huge impact of what your audience thinks the movie will be beforehand. if the audience somehow gets the wrong impression before the movie even started, there's a good chance they will hate your movie, regardless of its actual quality. (q.e.d. those reviews i made fun of.)

like i said, synder's view on the issue is very limited, but you've always had to have heard of a piece of media somehow. something, somewhere brought you to it and what exactly it was that got you interested has a huge (often subconscious) impact on what you will think of it. there has to be a reason why you think it will interest you.

there are no more tv guides that dictate our cinema night, but there sure are trailers and reviews and promotion posts and whatever our friend tell us. it's still very much happening.

and i dislike it. i really dislike knowing half the movie from the trailer alone. i dislike the entire set-up of the movie being incredibly boring because i already know what will happen from a 5 second snippet in the trailer. and this doesn't make the movie unenjoyable (unless it's really really bad) because there is loads of enjoyment to be found it stories that you already know (see any popular shakespeare play. im not watching them bc i want to know the plot!). but i still wonder how i often i actually watch a movie i know nothing about. how often im watching them like the makers thought i would, being introduced to every element only as it appears.

ever since, i've made an actual effort to know as little about a piece of media as possible before experiencing it. i've still managed to find stuff i like, often through obscure tumblr posting by users i know share the same taste in media as me. and sometimes through sheer luck and curiosity like clicking on random youtube recommendations of musical bootlegs.

and i am by now means saying that this is the superior media experience! i watched heathers, thinking it would be like highschool musical during act 1 and then i was gutted. i loved it. but there are very good reasons why heathers should have appropriate content warnings and i would not recommend it to others without mentioning the murder (or knowing the other person very very well). knowingly avoiding content indicators is born from the privilege of being okay to see all fictional content there could be and being open to any genre. it works for me because i enjoy it and find it interesting this way.

i just often think about how differently we all experience the same piece of media, not just from our internal bias but also from the trivial fact of how we heard of it and what we already know or expect from it.

i also made the experience that not knowing what a piece of media's strength is supposed to be leaves me open to appreciate any strength i find. this often has to do with genre expectations: for example i don't care if the plot of an action movie is stupid if the action scenes are cool, and i don't care if the action scenes in a romantic comedy are silly if the relationships are interesting etc. that's not what these movies are about! i find that when i don't know what my genre expectations are supposed to be im very forgiving to any flaws or weaknesses bc im assuming that that's probably not what it is about and that's okay. i try to find what it is about and what they were trying to do and i value it for whatever it does manage well.

i notice this a lot with with people watching a movie from a genre they are not familiar with. im thinking especially western audiences watching asian cinema. it operates by completely different rules because it's its own culture and idustry and often gets dragged (very very unfairly) for being "cheap". this is purely bc said audience is expecting and judging things that the makers of these movies or shows obviously never thought were the most important. and if you impose onto these movies that these things should be the most important and should be done a certain way, then that might be your own valid interpretation of whatever, but i think it's your own fault if you didn't like it.

trying to understand media while being cautious about whatever expectations you impose upon it can really make you enjoy movies so much more without having to compromise your annoying(affectionate) overanalyzing. trust me. open your mind, step into the light. bad movies can have earnest attempts to convey something if your willing to look kindly. picking it apart will be much more fun if you're trying to locate the little kernel that did work and trying to find why it worked and what its pitwalls were and how they could've been avoided.

anyways i lied this wasn't an essay it was just a ramble about media approaches. feel free to leave a comment of any length if you have any thoughts on this :^)

[waspstar]

weelllllll i just scrolled through my dash and saw 3 stories abt how ppl got into tmbg so I, the youngin am here to tell a tale. possibly boring but YALL KNOW I WANNA DO THIS  ok soooo ive been on the internet ever since the age of 8. ive seen some stuff, heard some stuff, talked to a lot of people. i had this big friend group in an online chatroom based around mlp, i was a big mlp fan. anyways, i used this website for like 2 years. i was 9 when i first started using it. its the second year, im 10. i had a friend who was really into this indie rpg called OFF. im sure some of yall have heard of it. anyway i didnt know about it but i ended up stumbling upon this video bc someone linked it in the chatroom: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGjnQ5aHpW8&t=22s (honestly im not even sure if this is the original video i watched, i just know it was an animated OFF video with the characters set to particle man) anyways i OBSESSED over this song. i downloaded it illegally on my phone, i learned the lyrics by heart. so i knew abt this song solely because of the internet. not because of tiny toons (bc im 13, wasnt even alive when that was on air) but because of the internet. so this song holds near and dear in my heart for yeaaarrs. fast forward to the middle of september, 2017. very recent, yes it took me this long. at this time i was a DIE HARD fan of vinesauce, vinny’s band red vox, and lemon demon and neil cicierega media alike. i heard somewhere that tmbg was similar to lemon demon. i was listening to particle man all these years after and thought “huh, if i like this so much maybe i should check out the rest of their catalog” so i did. i started with flood, since particle man was on it. i had no idea about these dudes, who they were, how old they were, their names, i didnt even know there were TWO singers. anyways, i loved flood. my favorites were whistling in the dark and hearing aid. the night after i listened to flood i checked out 4 more albums. lincoln, apollo 18, the else, and john henry. i only picked them bc they were on the youtube recommended section. completely random, for no reason. i listen to these for a bit and then i finally listen to the pink album. i love it. now at this point i still dont know much about them. i barely knew what they looked like and when i first looked at flans he looked really creepy to me. (i think it was the flansbeard, and his ominous smile) and linnell looked like an old woman to me which is weird. anyways, i listen to long tall weekend after pink. and then i listen to mink car a bit later. the night i listened to mink car was the same night i watched “gigantic: a tale of two johns” now at this point ive been meaning to watch this for a bit bc it was always recommended to me on youtube. i nestled up into my couch with a blanket and i watched on my phone. i instantly fell head over heels for the johns. i loved their voices, and how they talked about their music. watching them perform was so cool, and when first watching it a lot of the time i was sorta confused bc i dont understand music talk LOL but i was still really into it! it made me so into the johns! and the rest of the band! so the day after i watched gigantic, i searched google and lurked tumblr tags and found tons of pictures, silly videos, and audio and it made me love them EVEN more. i felt a spark of love for these guys, instantly. after mink car i checked out factory showroom, the spine. and now here i am, 6 months later, half of the discography ive already listened to. i only have 2 albums left. i love every single song, i know most of them by heart, and i couldnt be happier about my decision. i didnt like tmbg bc i was raised around it, or because a friend introduced me, or because my mom listened to it. no, i found it all on my own practically. i made the decision to listen to them and im so happy i did. the johns are musical geniuses, musical blessings, and i love them so so so so much. i dont know where i’d be without them. im a 13 year old whos homeschooled in a poor family, i dont do much everyday as you might imagine. its draining, doing nothing at all everyday. im not in tip top health as im never active and i havent had a real life friend in 6 years. but when i have they might be giants, i know ill get out of this secluded, lonely purgatory soon. 

[aspiestvmusings]

More quintis headcanons for when they're finally parents!

Hi, anon. 

Thank you for your submission, But Im a bit confused here. 

Did you  mean to send this message to this blog or some other blog? 

Cause the “more headcanons, please” confuses me, as I’ve not made any actual “Quintis (baby/family) headcanons” posts… At least not recently.

I have “wish lists” and “theories” and other kind of posts in the past that I have posted, where I share my thoughts on what I want the story to do for the Quintis baby storyline, and all that, but…  

I’m sorry…I’m confused right now about what you mean by your ask. I truly think you meant so send it to someone else. ?

As for posting more headcanons or wishes for the BABY QUINTIS plot… I don’t think I’ll be doing that. I’m not comfortable posting something unfinished, and as you’ve probably noticed this blog basically has no original content this year… so I do not think there will be much more besides the weekly “quintis moments” vids coming. Maybe I’ll write something before the finale, maybe not. 

I would like to ask anyone reading this to make their own post on this, and let’s tag it all the same way #BabyQuintis #QuitnisBaby #QuintisHeadcanons so they’d be easy to fid!

My Headcanons: 

Quintis Baby gender: Girl…with a slight chance of boy (I’ll decide after I watch 418 & 422)

Quintis Baby “neurotype”: genius… with a sligh chance of normal 

Quintis Baby name: Grace or Alex …with  a slight chance of other names 

Quintis Baby looks: asian/half-asian 

Quintis Baby origins: bio, bio with help from science/med, non-bio? #youknowtheanswer the only thing I’ll say about this is: if a bio kid will happen now, then adoption later/end of the series & vice versa: if an adoption will happen now, then a bio kid later/end of the series. That is my guess. 

Quintis Baby arrival time: season 5 (depending on possible timejumps & use of time and how things work… in a realitic/non realitic way…etc…): Nov sweeps, Xmas ep, Feb sweeps, S5 Finale (TV characters, whose pregnancy is revealed in season fianle, often give birth in the next season finale..having an impossible 52+ week pregnancy)

Quintis as parents: Happy will be the more serious mom, who’ll teach their kid to fix cars & Toby’ll be the more fun dad, who’ll play silly princess tea party games with their kid. 

Team Scorpion & Quintis Baby: it takes a village/Team Scorpion to raise a Quintis Baby! 

Quintis in S4: What I do love about it that though they’ve now added the infertility to the list…there has been no hint at Happy wanting a kid with 50% her and 50% not-Toby genes. It’s all or nothing for her…. that was made clear at the end of 416 already/again. And I also love that Toby is 100% supportive of her, and her decisions… regarding their future kid. I kinda think he actually had read her mind… a bit… during the 403 end scene… and he knew/knows what she wants (even before she speaks the words)… so despite how the scene might look… I think he was waiting for her to say… all …that… and we might be lucky and hear him reveal…in a future scene… that he actually knew all along…and just waited for her to be the one to start the conversation. #ImBeingCryptic

INSTEAD OF “HEADCANONS”, I HAVE A RANT, SPOILERY RANT: 

I have had many wishes for the QUINTIS FAMILY PLOT #BabyQuintis #QuintisBaby (that I have shared in my many past post regarding this storyline) and I love that it does look as if we’ll get to meet the newest, smallest TeamScorpion member in S5/next year and I love that we & Happy/Quintis get their forever dream/wish granted, but… I also have major issues with the shows handling of the plot (this has been going on since mid-S2, ep 2x13…basically..with season 2B hinting at the coming plot, then the S3 Cd-baby plot, and the ongoing S4 actual road to their family of more than two. And though we only have time for “it’s gonna happen” news this season… with meeting the kid having to wait til next season… we’re close now.) because they’ve used so many not good tropes on the way...

But despite how much I’ve wanted this plot, I must stand by my words, and say I still think the same way as I did in S2, and early S3…when I first posted my thoughts on the storyline and plot idea and all that. And despite loving many things about the plot (how, etc), I also have huge issues with it. And certain things about it. (about how some things were done). And I cannot say yet what exactly, cause that’d give away details about what happens in 418…and the eps after that. (meaning: how exactly this plot is resolved...after all this time)

Most importantly: this show is like any other network show… not brave. (I do not know if the “stalling” decision came from the studio, network, or writers/creative team, but whoever decided that it’s too soon in S3, because “babies mean end of crime shows” is the opposite of brave. #IveDetectedaWimp 

Because as much as that plot was amazing (S3: Happy’s journey to becoming a mom & S4: Toby’s journey to becoming a dad), and needed for Happy’s EQ development & for more..., then to use every single “bump on the road” to their desire for a family… doesn’t make a good story IMO. Too many cry-stories (mom died at childbirth, horrible childhood years with no parents/absent parents, false-positive and “losing the bay that never was”, decision to have a baby…with no continuity -- mention of the S3 emotional experiences, their/teams financial situation, the different options, the prep for this step) and worrying after just a few unseccuful months of trying, to fertility issues, and IVF treatment ... with yet another case almost ruining the important day of the procedure)… 

Just like the shows dedication to follow through with Paige’s/Ralphs Pilot-ep created rule “Scorpion saves everyone” makes the cases boring, and predictable, and not interesing to follow (cause it’s too predictable, too network TV style checking all the boxes, and following the same structure too much)... it’s same with this plot...for me.

And we all just know that either the 1st try won’t work and/or there’ll be pregnancy and/or birth complications, and/or issues with the babies health. Cause somehow there is a need to use every single plot idea for this. And that’s an issue with TV.. they try to do too many things (instead of using just some of the ideas/roadblocks...but make it good)…all at once…and there’s not enough time for all the plots, and most of the ideas get dropped/not finished properly…and same with this plot… and so…as much as I love it…and that it’s happening… it’s not that great. 

I can now say: I have issues with it (yes, I know how it ends/how it is resolved… though I don’t know what’s waiting in s5...still) Even with the happy ending..that was obvious… I’m not giving a “A+” grade for the plot as a whole. For each individual ep/part of the plot… yeah…but not to it as a whole. It’s finally time for everything I wanted..from the start (and it kinda feels like reading fanfic… cause I’m certain I’ve read the same scene in some fic…almost word-to-word…) & I can’t believe it’s gonna be canon..soon, but… I honestly can say that I didn’t really want it like this… 

I’ll end with a quote from Toby/the show: “We love each other. We’re gonna have a family. You’re gonna wait outside a school and you’re gonna build a crib and you’re gonna share tools with whatever baby is lucky enough to have you as their mom. It’ll happen when the time is right. It is gonna happen.“ - Toby to Happy, Scorpion 3x07 Quintis end scenes #itishappening

[amilliontinywraiths]

to the walnut people’s garden.

Blog,

Im starting my post in the way my friend Joshua does, as a letter to a digital realm of writing / reading / whatever u want to say about the cybernetic makeup on the tumblrverse. Mostly, I didn’t know how to start. Insert the meme format, every day I open Microsoft word and write absolutely nothing. Its paralyzing – to have some aspect of my identity wrapped up in “writing,” to be a “writer,” but to really exist as such in bursts. Every few months I’ll write something and lay it to rest in my hard drive, go back to living as a sentient being trying to scrape by eleven dollars an hour.

Its getting colder – the wind knocked over some plants outside, I opened the window and immediately closed it. Im worried about the lettuce dying from the frost. Im doing some reflection because there’s nothing else to do. Im googling depression lamps and silly tips to quit smoking and “psychiatric evaluations for cheap.”

My sister is in town and was asking me about my move, the semi-chaotic summer I lived when plans A and B fell through and my ass tumbled back to my hometown. Its depressing if I read too far into it, coming back to a place I swore I never would, being proof that “you always come back home” (because home is a vapid suburb). She had come to the garden last night, to see the space that picked me up and saved the move, to meet the people that have made this city feel like something new and worth appreciating, and not an exemplar of postgraduate failures. I think the garden might be the only thing that kept me in my hometown, feeling ashamed that I hadnt made it anywhere but here.

Let me explain myself. Im a little sick of the ‘2020 was a bad year [insert sad face]’ discourse, but it was a fucking bad year. So was 2019 and every year dating back to industrialization and colonial exploration, but im getting sidetracked. The year started with a silly (actually devastating and heartbreaking) breakup and months of depression. Of going to aa and spilling my sorrows to a group of gay 50-somethings who hugged me like I wasn’t a lost case. Of later fearing my loved ones, as if they were virus-carrying rascals, or worse, that I was and would infect and kill them all. Of having my visa cancelled but still needing to leave Chicago – fueling myself with the potentially false and certainly romantic idea that running away from ur friends and problems will fix it all. Im lamenting.

What im saying is im as surprised as you are at the success of kc. At the community and love ive found here, all cooked up in the garden squat. The day I met syd and cass and felt really shocked at the ease of meeting the anarchist poets, as if they were just waiting for me. when syd invited me to the garden one night and it all made sense – to take back the land and grow sunflowers. I wont go too far into my gaden-becoming (lol). As it will potentially be ripped away from us by landlord bastards in this next month, I need to solidify some reflections. To poorly paraphrase Audre lorde, you gotta write it down so you don’t forget how you felt. How you thought. Maybe in five years the garden will be flourishing. Or we will be sitting at the track tagging ‘fuck fascism’ as we approach our thirties. Or both.

The endless garden bonfires. Indistinguishable from the next. All the bonfires and cookouts melding into each other. The 200 Hams that showed up one night, maybe 180? The joy of collective drunkenness, peeing behind the shed, grabbing another beer on your way back. We began having movie nights. Thank god cadence brought all of the anime, secretly hoping nobody could possibly want to watch Edward Scissorhands. geeking with syd about poets. Spreading mulch at our first work day, gossiping about sean bonney and wendy Trevino with amalia, the excitement that someone else gave a shit about obscure poets. Later making a book club for just that. picking up two trunkloads of bricks from a gentrifying couple in the northeast, how they wanted to rid their property of the old chimney and practically begged me to take more. Making a path later with neve, I think, and being nervous about becoming friends with everyone. Having met so many people in such a short time. Planning to camp at the garden together, and instead, going to an impromptu occupation. The absolute failure of it all, when the occupiers began to police each other. ‘A world without police’ my ass. The walnut people’s garden tent we squeezed into. Playing ‘never have I ever’ with other twenty-somethings, realizing that the game is only spicy when nefarious activities are taboo—and they’re not taboo to us. Almost winning several games of chess in several different tents, though I think I always lost. That time when Syd’s birthday, when their literal hoard of friends came and went and I watched them from one of the garden beds. That art students look like art students everywhere I’ve been. I think I was talking to cass, about something, poetry maybe, at the garden bed. we were avoiding the group dynamic, that specific stomach feeling that arises when you don’t know anybody. The outdoor space fostering some normalcy, people being able to come and go and celebrate years around the sun. afterwards we went to jail support, a reminder that nothing is normal. “the new normal.” I had just dug up my own garden bed, which if I made decisions financially, was a huge money drain. But it taught me how to grow lettuces and how not to grow cauliflowers. I kept a journal with garden notes, which vegetables liked each other. I left it at the garden one night and it was rained on, completely disintegrated. A sweet first kiss on the garden bench, later, the garden bench showing up in a flash sheet that we’ll all choose tattoos from. the subsequent meme. the continual talk of memes fueled by @dante. A massive group tattoo session. The slew of items always left at the garden after a night of drinking. My debit card, my jacket, somehow always sydney’s backpack. Cullen always finding the objects since he was up earlier than us all. Later, dante’s birthday when I walked from the garden to sade’s apartment, which had a living room—quite literally—filled with only couches. Feeling warm and included, invited to something. Discovering sade is best friends with sue, who lives with Vivian. Facetiming Vivian from the garden, facetiming Vivian from the backyard. Feeling so lonely for so long, and then, suddenly pulled into this weird collective embrace. Pulling up to the the garden and freddy howling. Laying with freddy on the couch. The celebration of life erin and Cullen threw for freddy, when miranda made him this foul-looking peanut butter cake and someone took a bite of it. stealing a thousand cigarettes from bobby or kim or anyone who pulled out a pack near me. meeting syd dante and sade at the garden to break into an apartment complex’s pool. But residents were having a pool party with a vague america theme and we felt out-of-place. When we were driving home from the pool and dante spotted a note on the garden sign, our formal eviction notice. How hard it is to meet common ground with landowners, as a group of ppl who don’t believe in that shit. My dad telling me to just ‘buy the land.’ Are you interested in paying rent? The neighborhood association meeting, the landlords pushing for increased value moving into the neighborhood. Us leaving when the meeting proved too boring, typical leftists unable to sit through bureaucratic garbage. Send someone in our place. The giant saw that looked like an oil rig. How I was disappointed in my own passivity in the situation, letting them reverse screwdrive our land! How sometimes you make concessions for the big picture, but then you feel like a fraud in the moment. How maybe that is just an excuse. Cullen eating a grasshopper, suddenly everyone eating grasshoppers. A grasshopper loose in quicktrip, we considered asking to take it home with us. When we painted the sign and we didn’t like the proposed name, so we made up another one, which was admittedly not very anarchist of us. No collective decision making. The sign was later repainted after a meeting and it looked so much better. The meeting showing that we could fight and come to collective decisions and maybe we’d make it through the eviction. The eviction coming in two weeks, the plans for occupation. A slumber party with demands. A giant slingshot to launch discarded objects at construction trucks. A trebuchet. Maybe we’ll make it through the eviction.

To the walnut people’s garden. 

[dapperfvck-arc]

How do you run your blog?

Repost; Do Not Reblog

Speed: It really depends. Usually I’ll get to a thread within a week or two at the longest. Given that have several partners that I talk to and plot with daily/weekly, we generate a lot of new ideas frequently and when something takes awhile, it usually got buried by under a crust of new threads and occasional meme prompt ask. My drafts box is like an archeological site, I swear. Sometimes I do have trouble with inspiration for a reply, but usually it’s just a matter of getting wrapped up with my little circle of friends and co-writers.

A side note, during my working week, my productivity slows to a crawl. I’m usually better off in Skype or tumblr IM and may get to a thread or two either before or after work if I’m just not in lurk/shit post mode until I pass out.

Replies: Aesthetically I use extremely light formatting. The first word always bolded and italicized and default size with all other text smaller. I also bold the quotation marks in dialogue because it looks hella cool on my blog proper given that I have bolded/italicized text is a different colour than the rest of the text. It also looks classy af on the dash. Icons for either FC depending on verse or comic caps are used until it gets to nsfw stuff or with some drabble prompts. As for preferences, I’m really quite flexible. Honestly, tho, I’m a multi-para whore and with most threads, eventually they start to get longer and longer. However, unless I can’t parse my muse’s thoughts on a matter or situation, I won’t go in hard and fast on a one-liner or small single para. Unless you’re one of my people, but then again, you prolly already have experience being slapped with my throbbing multi-para hard-on. 

I don’t expect people to match me, and sometimes I may struggle to match length, as well, but I do like to see an attempt. Like if I give you a four para starter, I would prefer not to get a two sentence reply back (some of you are shaking your head, but this actually happened to me in my halcyon days in the community).

Starters: I don’t do greeters, because idk, for me it feels like when a teacher called on you because you weren’t paying attention. Nearly every time I’ve gotten a greeter, I’m unprepared and feel quite suddenly pressed. The RPC is already a ball of anxiety 85% of the time and I don’t want to add to anyone’s discomfort, providing I’m not the only crazy person who reacts to getting a greeter like a distant gunshot. Depending on how clogged my drafts box is and how busy I am, I probably post a starter call every couple weeks and open starters very rarely because like, idk, no one ever hops on them, so I don’t really feel like they’re welcome. In the case of the latter, I only ask that people read the tags. Some open starters are meant for mutuals, particularly ones with some established interaction.

Unless they’re plotted starters (or replies to longer ask box meme responses that I wanted to turn into a thread), they usually start short and often vague. Please don’t keep it vague. It drives me nuts. I want you to present an idea, go out on a limb, whatever (I mean within reason of course, use your common sense, too). 

Inbox: It’s a mess, tbqh. A lot of times I mindlessly reblog or queue memes, especially at work or when I’m out and about on mobile, and then don’t feel like doing them or get excited over certain prompts over others. I will say that I keep things in my inbox for a very long time and might get to replying to prompt weeks to months later. Frequently I will draft ones that I know will be long.

Selectivity: Hoooo boy. I’m pretty fucking selective tbh. I like my partners to be literate and of course be able to enjoy their portrayal/character. That’s not to say I’m not open to meeting new people and interacting with new muses. I don’t need to know your muse extensively to RP with you, but I’m also perfectly willing to educate myself (I’m not going to front, I was compelled to watch both Daredevil and Preacher for the sake of character/canon research, as well as starting to read Lucifer). Also, I mostly RP with mutuals, but again, that doesn’t mean I’m not willing to discover new mutuals, you feel me?

Sometimes when my stress levels are high or I’m drowning in drafts, I tend to be a bit more standoffish and stick to “my people”, however this doesn’t last for long and may be broken by a compelling enough new interaction.

Wishlist item: *pounds table aggressively* CONSTANTINE FAM! AND I SUPPOSE THIS IS REALLY SELFISH BUT I WANT A CHERYL OR GEMMA RP BLOG IN MY LIFE. AND IDEK MAYBE HAVING A CHERYL BLOG WOULD BE BORING AS SHIT, BUT A GEMMA??? SURELY TO FUCK SOMETHING FASCINATING COULD BE DONE WITH HER. Also: CHAS! ELLIE! HELL BLAZER CANON CHARACTERS PLS. 

ahem.

Anyway, idk, I really don’t have a wishlist? I mean, there are certain themes I’m keen to explore. Like my mythological bent to John, and developing certain verses, but like...all things considered I’m just more interested in world and relationship building than ticking off a wishlist of AUs or situations I want to see played out. 

Honest note: I’m fiercely independent, and I don’t put up with bullshit. Honestly, I don’t have much tolerance for drama and the easiest way to push me away is pull me into a vortex of social or interpersonal drama. Been there, done that, and honestly I can be a bit skittish if I start getting a weird vibe. I’m coming up on five years RPing on tumblr and there’s not a lot that shocks me anymore. 

A few more admissions:

-- I love writing ships. When I wrote fanfic, it was 95% shippy stuff. That doesn’t mean it’s all about romance, fluff, and sex, sometimes it’s just how two muses relate to each other or a glimpse into their lives together, but I know my strengths and tend to default to them. This doesn’t mean I’m out to collect lovers for John or am not willing to step out my comfort zone, just that there’s going to be a lot of that stuff here.

-- If we talk ooc, there’s a 100% more possibility that you’re going to get more attention from me both ic and ooc. It’s just a matter of comfort level. Though I might seem together and confident, it’s only really in regard to my writing. I’m intimidated by people who are so much better at being witty and fun and silly on tumblr and chatty about their characters and fandom outside of the constraint of meme prompts or whatever. I guess I’m just afraid of boring people or having followers roll their eyes like “omg Iggy stfu. Don’t you have twenty-odd replies? Chop, chop you anal retentive bitch.” Mind, no one’s actually said this to me, I just have dodgy self-esteem, honestly, and some days are worse than others.

-- If I tell you I think you’re a good writer, I mean it. This is important.

-- If I tell you I’m worried about the quality of a reply I gave you, I’m not fishing for compliments, I’m legitimately uncertain that you’ll like it. Just fyi.

-- I’m bad at writing m/f ships in any expedient manner. I have no good excuse for this other than being queer trash that would rather write about men being in love and lust. And uh, that’s not a good excuse at all. I’m just the literal worst and I’m sorry I come off as not inclusive enough. Honestly, I’m trying to be better about this deep failing of mine.

-- I apologize a lot for things I shouldn’t. Sorry lol

Tagged by: @vamptrampbamf

Tagging: @dcviltongued, @aliasinvestigate, @hittcr, @haharlarious, @riskedfalling, @hawkwxrd, @rageinmybones