#in a few places showing feet is actually against the rules

[prinzrupprecht]

Asking them if you’re their type

Featuring: Susano’o, Loki, Qin, and Apollo ( part 1 )

Ight new series! And yes, established relationship.

Part 2.

Warnings? Mostly fluff.

Susano’o

Being the wife of the sword god, you must’ve impressed him somehow. Well, you were yet you were having doubts about why he asked for your hand in marriage of all the women he could’ve wanted.

You were an ordinary fighter. You used the legendary Kusanagi no Tsurugi sword and created new wind-style techniques. While Susano’o used the Totsuka-no-Tsurugi. Was it by luck you had created such a fine blade? Susano’o had spotted you training one day and was acting crazy over your techniques.

He begged you to teach him your kenjutsu techniques that you’ve learnt from humans. In a way, you liked how he was super fun to be around with until he told everyone from the Shinto pantheon that you were his wife. It was supposed to be a secret to keep quiet. Amaterasu? You were certain she wanted to kill you. However, you were a female sword goddess like Susano’o except you weren’t for the seas and storms. You represented warm breezes and spring. They found you as the perfect match for him.

“Oh no, he’s gone somewhere again…��� you mumbled looking ahead over the hill but Susano’o was already fighting in a new battle showing off his sword skills.

“You see that! It barely scratched me,” Susano’o was enthusiastic despite all the humans that watched him kill such a beast to save them. He was dressed and disguised differently when he was around them. You haven’t been a saviour to anyone unlike him. Your insecurities were eating at you more. Were you really supposed to be his wife? On a good note, he had no interest in other women or wanted to take on concubines or a second wife.

You two walked towards your small lodge home in the Honshu region. Susano’o always changes back to his normal form and appearance when he’s alone with you or those who were considered his family from the Shinto Temple. It’s very rare he would socialize with humans and it’s against the rules for you and him to actually talk to humans.

He was very affectionate, but mostly it’s him holding you in his lap and talking in your ear about his passions with the sword. You loved listening to him and falling asleep soundlessly on him. You always woke up being suffocated by his big arms holding you in place.

As the two of you returned, you turned to your loving husband and asked him the question that had been bothering you. “Susano’o-san, why did you ask me to be your wife? Am I really your type? Sometimes it feels like our personalities are different,” you felt a sting of embarrassment stir in your lower abdomen waiting for him to answer.

His face turned serious as he stopped what he was doing— sharpening his sword as soon as you two returned. His mouth gaped and you stood frozen a few feet away from him. “I never felt more like myself around someone who understands me. What’s better than not having the sword goddess with the sword god? So of course, you’re my type in every way possible!” One of his hands cupped one side of your cheek.

“What if I said no to your proposal?” You were acting innocent and he gave you a puzzled stare.

“I don’t think I would’ve taken no for an answer,” his response made your heart beat faster as he wrapped his arms around your body.

Loki

You loved him; everything about him. Even accepting his weird side. Was it normal? No. He used to tell you he had a massive crush on Brunhilde before you came along and cured him. Massive? Why would he tell you that? Loki normally wasn’t honest about such things regarding his feelings. You had wondered if he was toying with you once again.

You weren’t a goddess of trickery so you had no idea how you made him move on and treat you as his woman. You have always liked him since childhood. Yet, it turns out he had a thing for the Valkyrie woman and you never knew about it. A part of you was happy he had used you as a stepping stone to move on from Brunhilde— someone who would’ve never liked him back. You wanted to believe you weren’t a rebound, but the doubts were still there. He doesn’t mention her and only pays attention to you mostly.

He even gets jealous of other men who were guards of Asgard that compliment you. You wondered what made him like you. You weren’t anything like Brunhilde at all. She was brave and cold towards others. You were quiet, shy and very observant of your surroundings.

You were fixing up one of the gowns Loki had gotten you. It had a bad tear in it and you wanted to fix it up and wear it for him. You were using a sewing machine before Loki barged into your room. “Where were you? Thor said you didn’t appear at the main hall to greet some of our guests.” Loki saw you holding the gown in your hands. It was all torn up and you couldn’t even look him in the eyes.

“What happened? I’ll get you anoth— actually, I’ll fix it.” Loki started to feel bad that the gown he got you had a tear in it, and you didn’t make an appearance with him to the meeting with some important gods of the pantheon.

“One of the cats got spooked when I entered my room and had accidentally ripped the dress a bit that was hung up while running out of the room. I wanted to fix it and wear it… for you.” You couldn’t even look him in the eyes. Loki was embarrassed realizing he was the cat and fell speechless for a moment. Why did you want to fix such a thing that he found in the commoner’s section of the palace? He didn’t want to tell you that but a deep part of him felt saddened you were going through such lengths for this dress he got you.

“Why not wear something else?” He grabbed your hands but you shook your head. Loki was puzzled for a moment but he knew he wouldn’t be able to change your mind.

He grabbed one of the needles and attached the string to it. He was using magic to sew it up quicker than the machine.

“Done. Are you happy?”

“One more thing before I put it on and be yours for the night.” You nodded. Weren’t you already his? Loki had thought but didn’t say anything.

“Am I really your type? Like wouldn’t everyone there find me… too different to be with you?” You brought the dress up to your face to cover your embarrassment.

“I wouldn’t be going to such extreme lengths to keep you with me if I didn’t like you. I’d prefer you like this and not anything like me. Now, put this on and it’s not for one night. You mean more than that to me,” he lifted your chin up with his index finger.

You nodded gleefully and happy with his answer. You were certain he was telling the truth.

Qin Shi Huang

You were his empress, named and married to him. Despite his reluctance in wanting to marry anyone before he met you— a hard-headed woman who didn’t want any man to sway you. You fought against his army to survive. He was conquering lands and is the emperor and king of the Qin dynasty period of China.

You couldn’t tolerate him in the beginning. He liked ruling and ordering people around. However, you didn’t care who he was. Royal or commoner, everyone was the same to you. Zheng saw you as someone he wanted and desired. It felt impossible for him to obtain despite your reluctance and hard-headed nature.

“I heard you were giving the maids a bit of a hard time earlier,” Zheng walked into your shared room with a curious look on his face despite the blindfold. He was right but also had it wrong. You overheard them talking about how they wanted to be his mistress despite he was yours. It’s not uncommon for imperial rulers to have multiple wives, consorts or mistresses when the man is bored. You had torn down Zheng’s proposals to be his woman many times. He still never gave up but something in you snapped at those maids.

Chasing a man who is already married? How disrespectful. “Sorry for my behaviour, they said some things I didn’t like.” You muttered before turning your head away from him in embarrassment. You were trying to conceal your face from him.

“They upset you? Shall I have them punished—"

“N–No, not at all!” Your voice must’ve squeaked when he suggested punishment. Qin was oblivious to what others felt about him, but his eyes were only glued to you.

Qin walked towards you before forcing your face to look up to him. He took his blindfold off since you two were alone. He was going to speak once again to not let others get to you.

Your insecurities have been eating at you lately and you spoke before he did. “Zheng… am I really your type?” You were flustered but he was not.

“Ha, what? My type? What does that suppose to mean? I just like what I see and if I want something, I’ll do whatever in my power to achieve that. Is that a perfect answer for you, my empress?” He leaned in to call you his empress. Your heart must’ve jumped to your throat. You had no idea what to say to that. He wanted you for a long time and now he has you?

You were satisfied and sighed showing how weak you were in front of him. Only he was able to get you this flustered and feeling vulnerable around him. He loved it and loved making you a mess during private times.

Apollo

Being the wife of Apollo came with a lot of work. Previously you were just a lower-ranked deity of the Greek pantheon that served the Olympus Palace. Apollo didn’t care that much about your existence in the beginning, but it bothered him that you weren’t into him or swayed by his beauty. It dented his ego and turned him into someone who chased you and not the other way around.

Oh, how you miss the old days of being someone who wasn’t very important to anyone. You were quiet, shy and liked to read on your own without being bothered. You were a deity of knowledge and wisdom. You liked history and watching over humanity to learn about their existence. Your whole purpose was to learn and expand your knowledge. Why or how did Apollo come to like you? It was a mystery to you.

You hated the women he used to surround himself with constantly. Not because you were jealous, they were constantly fawning over him and melting in the halls in his presence. It made you uncomfortable how they talked about him a lot when all you cared about was the library and archives. You never cared about getting to know the other gods at the Olympus palace, but maybe because of how different you were made the sun god fall for you.

Apollo had followed you into the archives numerous times considering he was also the God of Philosophy and wanted to get to know the woman obsessed with knowledge. Was he that fascinated with you? He would comment about how your beauty exceeds others and had asked for your hand in marriage. You told him no unless you were the only one which you had hoped he’d leave and decline your request. However, he accepted it. Were you surprised? Yes. He had to give up some part of him just so he could have you to himself. He hasn’t touched any other woman other than you since.

This brought you to wonder why you? Were you his type? What even is his type? He always told others you were his wife. It’s been several years since then. You had lost count. He was busy with many things regarding the Greek pantheon. Whenever Zeus asked him to do something, he was quick to his feet to do it.

You loved him and it took time to realize it. Apollo was deeply in love with everything about you in the beginning. You were sitting alone while reading in the library thinking about your husband. “Why are you still here? It’s late.” You heard Apollo’s voice near the entrance of the room from behind. Oh, it was late? You didn’t say much but closed the book and smiled. Immediately Apollo knew something was wrong and walked over to you to see what you were doing. He picked up one of the books that were lying in front of you on your desk. Romance novels? You never read fiction. You always preferred research.

“I didn’t take you for being into this sort of thing?” he placed the book back down on the desk. You weren’t embarrassed in all honestly. He was someone that was easy to open up to.

“I’m just curious, humans that have written these books over the years must’ve experienced or strongly desire the connection with someone… am I someone you wanted that connection with? Sometimes I feel like… I’m not your type.” Your question made Apollo reach for your hands and hold them.

He hummed, “there’s no such thing as being my type. My type is someone who I deem worthy of my love. What a rhetorical thing to ask, but I can’t deny the connection I felt for you, in the beginning, was something more deep than a simple desire. Did I want you? You already know the answer to that but since you like the comfort of hearing it from me, then yes, I was very interested in you from the start.” His response had you feeling weak for him more.

“Let’s head to bed, or do you want me to keep you awake?” He leaned in your ear as one hand cupped your left cheek.

You weren’t going to get much sleep that night and you were right.

Note: part 2 has no ETA release date. May take a day break unless I get a request that piques my interest.

[jjkarmy091]

The boyfriend Game- Jungkook (1)

synopsis: You never thought that fighting for a position in JV's team would end up with you falling for the guy who was helping you out with it, especially since he had the same rule as you: no date, no romance, just socceer

> pairing: Soccer playerJungkook x (f) reader

> genre: romance, strangers to friends to lovers; angst; fluff

> word count: 13.727

> Author's note: this is an adaptation of one of my favourite books. A couple days ago I came across it again I thought it'd be perfect for a Jungkook adaptation, since I can see him behaving like this. Hope you like it as much as I do <3

The afternoon sun was beating down on my shoulders as I watched an evil leer light up the face of my best friend, Jennie Kim. Her long legs were like sticks below her shorts, and there was the faintest gleam of sweat over the upturned nose that she swore was her only decent feature.  

“Just try and stop me, Y/n,” she taunted, her dark curls bouncing with each step. 

“Just try and get by me,” I shot back, grinning as she got closer. It might be just a routine one-on-one drill on a Thursday afternoon of JV soccer practice, but it was always a lot more than that when I was going one-on-one with her.  

Jennie was better than me at soccer even tho she didn’t even try. I busted my butt of and she was still better. She hated the fact that over the summer, I’d gotten a real figure and she was still as skinny as ever, so we were even. Especially since we’d totally make the trade if we could. She’d take all the attention I got from guys in a heartbeat, and I’d give that up in a minute if I could have her soccer skills. Actually, I’d give it up in a minute for free, if I could. Only six weeks into my freshman year of high school and already I was tired of the boys treating me differently than they used to.  

Jennie’s smile faded into concentration, and I focused on every angle of her body, trying to anticipate what move she’d pull to try to get past me. My muscles tensed, and I felt the zip of adrenaline that I loved, the sensation of power that had me running for the soccer field every afternoon, totally pumped to sweat and yell and forget about all the baggage of my day at school. On the soccer field, it wasn’t about boys and girls or how I looked it was about how good you were. It was my favorite place to be. 

“Hey Y/n. Looking good out there!”  

Jennie sucked in her breath, and I scowled at the sound of Taehyung’s obnoxious voice, not even bothering to glance at the sidelines where I knew he’d be standing with his loyal shadow, Jimin. Probably wearing Nike sunglasses, baseball hats, and faded jeans, like they always did, knowing just how to dress to look good. 

Well, they were cute, but they were also idiots, so I shut them out and concentrated on Jennie. Her gaze flicked towards Tae and I grinned. Oh, she was so busted. Keep yelling, Tae. One little distraction was more than enough for me to take her out. 

“Y/n! Hey, Y/n Perkins! You gonna come to Pop’s tonight with me or what?” Tae shouted. 

Jennie scowled at me. I bit my lip and quickly adjusted to her sudden increase in intensity. Great. So now she was going to take it out on me that he was yelling my name and not hers. Classic Tae, always screwing up my life. 

Jennie'scheeks turned pink and she shot a quick look in his direction. I lunged forward to take advantage of the distraction, my cleats grabbing the turf as I plucked the ball from between her feet. She spun around and I dodged her, making a snarky face at Tae, who was yelling something about how he liked my new haircut. He should be shouting about my great steal, not making some stupid comment about my hair. It was then when I noticed a guy standing next to him and Jimin. 

He was way taller than them, had short dark hair and a few tattos on his arm. He was wearing soccer cleats and shorts that showed off his oh-so-muscular soccer legs. He was holding a soccer ball against his hip, his arm hanging loosely over it. Who the heck was he? 

Before I knew it, Jennie was next to me, her feet were on the ball, then I went flying. I threw up my arms as I went skidding on my left hip and wound up in a face-plant in the grass. She crowed in victory and I rolled to a sitting position, spitting grass out of my mouth. Tae and Jimin howled with laughter, and I immediately glanced over to them. To the mysterious guy. 

Who was gone. 

I made a quick scan of the fields, but I didn’t see him anymore. Where’d he go? 

My other best friend, Sana, walked up and peered down at me. She was wearing cleats and a tee shirt like I was, but she was still clean. No sweat, no dirt. Not that it was a surprise as she only played JV soccer to hang out with us. I played to play for real. Jennie played . . . well . . . I was never quite sure with her anyway. 

“You almost had her,” Sana said. I sighed.

“I know.” It was always almost when it came to beating Jennie at soccer. 

Sana held out her hand and pulled me up. “I mean, you did have her, and then you let her come back and get you. What was up with that?” As if I were going to tell her that I’d let a boy distract me. That was their move not mine. Actually, it was totally embarrassing, so I shrugged. 

“I felt bad for her. Didn’t want to show her up with Tae watching.” Sana snorted.  

“Yeah, right. You have no mercy on the soccer field.” 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” My thigh was burning big-time, so I hiked up my shorts and inspected the raspberry that started up by my hip and went halfway down my thigh. It was already bright red. I grinned, loving the badge of honor it gave me.  

Despite what Tae might think, there was so much more to me than what I looked like. I was a warrior! “There goes my plan to wear a miniskirt tomorrow,” I joked. 

The guys yelled and whistled so I pulled my shorts back down to cover my leg, my cheeks suddenly hot. Guys were so annoying! 

Sana raised both her eyebrows. They were carefully shaped to augment her bright blue eyes, courtesy of a makeover by Jennie last weekend that had ended up with all of us sporting highlights and new haircuts. Not that you could tell with me, except for the fact that some of the layers weren’t staying in my ponytail very well. Well, you could see the auburn highlights in the darker brown of my natural hair color, but that was it. 

“You’ve never owned a skirt in your life,” Sana said. I grinned. I definitely wasn’t a skirt girl.  

“Nice raspberry.” Jennie flounced toward us, shooting a flirtatious grin in the direction of the sidelines. “Totally uncool to take advantage of me when Tae distracted me. If I hadn’t beaten you in the end, I’d make you kiss my toes.” A reference to when we were little and dorky, and we used to make the other one actually kiss our toes when we made up from a fight, or after one of us did something mean to the other. 

“There would have been no toe kissing,” I shot back. “It’s your own fault for not paying attention.” 

She was wearing a fitted tee shirt and spandex shorts and was having a successful trial with her new water-proof makeup. She was tall, thin, and had thick curly hair—everything that Sana wasn't, with her short, stock-ier figure, although she was blond and we knew Jennie would kill for Sana’s straight, golden locks. 

They were both totally cute and into the guys. I mean, Jennie had dropped her notebook last week and I’d seen that she’d written Taehyungs name all over the inside cover, not that she’d ever admit it out loud. And Beth was right there with her in checking the guys out. They both spent ten minutes doing their makeup before practice, in hopes of getting guys to yell at them. 

Coach Merrill blew her whistle. “I have an announcement to make everyone. As you know every season at the end of October, I pick two girls from JV to move up to varsity for the rest of the season. Two weeks from this Friday, we’ll be having tryouts with the varsity practice. The top five girls on JV will be invited to that practice but only two will move up.” 

No way! Varsity, how great! My heart started racing as I inched closer so I wouldn’t miss any of the details. 

“So, I wanted to announce the five short-listed players, so you can tell me if you’re interested in being considered.” 

I stole a glance at Jennie. She was better than I was, but she didn’t work nearly as hard. Would Coach take that into account? Five spots weren’t many when there were over forty girls on the squad. Lookig at my best  friend I notice her paying more attention to the guys looking at us than to coach Merryl. I adored her but honestly I don’t think she should be one of the selected.  

“The players I’m considering are Kathleen Hoffman , Heidi Maxwell , “Vicky Conant . . .” 

Jennie leaned over. “Sana, I think Jimin is checking you out.” She smacked her on the arm. “No way! Really?” She turned bright red and immediately turned her back on the boys.  

“Y/n, you look at them and tell me if she’s lying.” 

“Shut up!” I stepped away from them, straining to listen as the other girls on the team started whispering. 

“Jennie Kim . . .” 

I bit my lip against the sudden swell of jealousy as I heard Sana squeal behind me. Great.  

“And Y/n Perkins.” Yes! Sana threw her arms around me.  

“That’s so awesome! You guys are too cool!” 

Coach said something about practice being over for the day, but I didn’t hear her. My heart was pounding too loudly. It was going to be two long weeks, but you’d make it. It was your dream . You had to get it.  

Jennie got quiet as Tae leaned over us. “Competition among friends,” he teased. “Who’s going to win? Y/n or Jennie? Are we going to have a girl fight?” I rolled my eyes.  

“Shut up.” See? This is why I avoided guys like him. Total idiots. Where were the congratulations? The appreciation for being picked for the short list? 

“You wish, Taehyungie.” Jennie giggled. “But we’ll be sure to call you if we do.” Sana and I exchanged a groan, then he grabbed my hand and tugged me to my feet before I could jerk away from him.  

“How about going to Pop’s for a little celebration, Y/n? A little dancing, maybe?” His gaze flicked to my hair. 

 “A quick shower and a change of clothes and you’ll be smoking.” I yanked my hand out of his grip. 

 “No, thanks.” Pop’s was the local hangout for the kids at our high school. They served great pizza, had free refi lls on soda, and owned a sweet jukebox stocked with all the best tunes, including the newest JamieX CD. 

I’d been so psyched to start going there once we were freshmen, but lately it totally bummed me out. It was all about guys being loud and obnoxious and checking out the girls, and girls worrying about their hair and their makeup and giggling at the guys.  

“I’m going to practice some more.” 

“Practice?” he laughed. “Are you kidding? It’s Thurdsay night. Time to party.” Jennie fluffed her hair and smiled at him. 

 “I’ll go to Pop’s with you. Y/n might be antisocial, but I’m not.” I frowned at her remark. She hadn’t made comments like that before this fall, when Taehyung had started noticing me.  

“I take soccer seriously. That’s a good thing.” 

“Unless it gets in the way of fun,” she said. “Come on, Sana, let’s go shower.” She gave him a special smile. 

“We’ll be ready in twenty minutes. Can you wait?” 

“Sure.” He took another look at me, then headed off toward the gym with Jimin. I leveled a look at Sara. 

 “I’m not fun?” 

“If you pick soccer over hanging out with Tae at Pop’s then yes.” I folded my arms, a sudden hope flaring in my chest. 

“So, does that mean you’re going to turn down Coach for the varsity thing?” She glanced at wher the guys were then met my gaze. “Do you want me to?” 

“Ha. Of course not.” But even as I said the words, I realized I was sort of lying. If she dropped out I had a much better chance at making varsity. Iwas probably tied with Heidi as the third best on the team, behind Jennie and Kathleen. But I wanted Jennie there with me. Together, but if it came down to her or me . . . No. She was my friend. I wanted her to get it too. I swallowed hard and managed a smile. 

“Why don’t you stay and practice with me? I could really use your help to bone up on my skills in the next two weeks.” She cocked her head, actually considering it, then Tae ruined it. 

“Hey, Y/n. I’ll save you a seat in case you change your mind. You know you can’t resist me forever!” 

Jennie hesitated. “I’m going for varsity, but I’m not going to miss out on fun by staying late to practice. I’m going with them” Then she turned away and broke into a jog to run after the guys. 

It was going to be a lot harder if I had to practice by myself. I couldn’t help but watch as the girls caught up to the boys. I didn’t want them going out without me. I mean, I didn’t want to go, but I wanted them to stay with me. All girls, like it used to be. 

 I could hear their laughter all the way across the field and I coun’t help but sigh and started to get majorly depressed, then suddenly realized that the varsity girls were jogging toward me on their way to take over our field for practice.  I forgot all about my friends as I watched the varsity players start drilling. For a few minutes, I was in awe of their footwork and their ball handling skills. 

They were joking around and having fun, but they were totally serious too. I’d miss JV, but this was so my world. 

I belonged. 

Then I realized how much better they were than I was, how much I needed to improve to have a chance with them. Shoot, I didn’t belong. Not yet. Not by a long shot. Even Jennie needed to get better, and she wasn’t practicing, was she? I should run to the gym and tell her. 

I should.  

But I didn’t. She’d made her choice, right? Instead, I snagged a ball and headed over to the smaller practice field behind the equipment shed. I wanted varsity and giving up a little time with my friends rotted, but it was worth it.  

They didn’t get me, not this part of me. The part of me that loved to have grass stains on my shorts and sweat rolling down my temples. Thepart that loved being out there with the ball, in a world where nothing mattered except how you played. 

I broke into a jog, dribbling the ball in front of me, a sense of rightness settling over me as my muscles started to work. No Tahyung around to judge me and make me feel stupid for not caring about my hair. When I rounded the corner I saw the guy I’d noticed during practice. I immediately tripped on my soccer ball and went down. I popped back up, watching as he dribbled two balls through an obstacle course of cones. 

His head was down and his body loose. He had the great build that all soccer players have, with strong legs and fit upper bodies. His hair was dark and stuck to his head.  

Why hadn’t I seen him before? I knew everyone who played soccer. Not that it mattered. It wasn’t like I was going to talk to him. I picked up my ball and started to turn away to find somewhere else to practice, when the misterious guy lifted his head and looked right at me. 

And I totally forgot what I’d been about to do. 

He stopped drilling, flicked one of the balls up with his toe, then bounced it off his knee, then flipped his foot behind him and caught the ball off his heel. Damn, he was good. He bounced the ball high off his thigh, let it land on his forehead, then headed it straight up in the air, then did it again, dribbling off his forehead arms out for balance, feet moving quickly to stay under the ball. He was definitely showing off.  

I rolled my eyes and started to turn away, then saw him head the ball at me. Reacting instinctively, I spun back toward him and blocked it with my foot. He grinned and nailed the second ball at me. I headed it back toward him and he trapped it with his right foot. He fl ipped the ball up at me again with his toe and I caught it as he walked up.  

“Nice reactions,” he said. No comment about my hair or my looks? That alone was almost enough to redeem him from showing off with the hackey sack moves.  

“Thanks.” 

“What’s up?” He raised his brows in question and I noticed his eyes. Big brownished eyes and intense gaze. This guy was simply waiting for an answer. Like he actually wanted to know what I had to say.I relaxed a little bit. 

 “Soccer.” Like anything else mattered, right? He was out here practicing. He might actually understand where I was coming from. 

He nodded. “Me too. I’m Jungkook, just transferred here a couple weeks ago. You are ?” There were trickles of sweat dripping down the sides of his face. He didn’t smell bad, though. He just had the scent of sports. I liked it, I mean, I didn’t like it, like it. It just made me feel comfortable. 

“Y/n” 

He used his toe to tug my ball out from under my foot and I let him. “So what are you doing on the fields at this hour?” he asked. 

“Trying to find a place to practice. You?” He started in on the hackey sack thing again, and this time I realized that he was paying more attention to the ball than to me. Maybe he wasn’t showing off, maybe he was just doing it because he liked to do it. 

“Same here,” he said. “I need to beat out Jung Hoseok for center forward so I’m taking a little extra practice.” He bounced the ball off his right knee, then his left, then right, then left again.

“You any good?” 

“I can’t do that,” I blurted out. He grinned, showing a dimple, his gaze flicking briefl y to me before focusing on the ball again. 

 “So, that’s why you’re practicing? Because you’re terrible?” I couldn’t help but laugh.  

“No, I’m not terrible. Why? Are you terrible?” 

“Never.” He caught the ball and eyed me. “You staying around for a while?” 

“’Til it’s dark.” 

“You want to drill, or what?” 

A flash of nervousness ran through me. I swallowed, suddenly very aware that he was a guy. Was this his way of making a move on me? Yeah, not interested.  

“Um, I kinda . . . was going to do some on my own.” 

“Suit yourself then.” He turned, dropped the ball, and dribbled away. Instantly I felt a stab of regret as I watched him maneuver the cones. He’d been totally normal with me, and he was way better than I was.  

It would’ve been awesome to drill with him. Awesome because it would help my game and that’s why I was here. He peered back over his shoulder at me.  

“You coming or what?” I hesitated.  “Afraid you can’t keep up with me?” He stopped and started doing the hackey sack thing again. I smiled.

“No way.” 

“Don’t believe you.” 

I thought of the girls on varsity practicing around the corner and of my friends fooling around with the guys, leaving me behind. This kind of practice was exactly what I needed and he hadn’t seemed to even notice I was a girl. 

“Well?” 

I can handle this. “Fine.” I dropped my ball to the field, then dribbled toward him.  

“I’m in.” He flashed me a grin and then spun back toward the cones. “Follow me.” 

Five minutes later, he’d reset the cones so there were two lines. One had about twice as many cones as the other, but it was the same setup. He pointed to the one with more cones.  

“That’s my course. We’ll start at the same time and race through it, to the end and back. Loser has to run a lap.” 

I bit back a complaint about the fact he had more cones than I did. If he wanted to give himself a handicap, I’d make him pay. “Fine.” 

“If you knock down a cone, ten push-ups.” I chuckled. My adrenaline kicked in.  

“Be prepared to run a lap.” He laughed back.  

“You’d better beat me. You have half the cones I do.” 

“Oh, I will.” 

“Let’s see it, then.” He took his ball and lined up behind the start line he’d set up. I moved next to him, my muscles relaxed and my mind focused. He was so going down. Guys didn’t take girls seriously on the sports field, and he was going to learn he’d made a mistake. 

“You call it” he said. I nodded and took my stance. 

 “Ready.” 

He set his gaze on the cones. 

“Set.” 

We both tensed. 

“Go!” 

I took off, burning through the cones, listening to him breathing heavily right beside me. I pressed harder, determined to leave him behind, but he didn’t go away. The cones blurred past my feet, and I hit the end, spun around the cone and headed back, digging in as hard as I could, even as I was aware of him pulling ahead of me. 

My quads were screaming, but I pushed even more and blew through the last six cones, giving a whoop as I crossed the finish line. He was already done, his chest heaving and a big grin on his face.  

“Not bad,” he said. 

“You beat me.” I bent over, trying to catch my breath. He gave a snort of amusement.  

“If it bugs you, beat me next time.” 

“Oh, I will. Just give me a second.”  

I was pretty sure I’d never run that hard before in my life. And it rocked. He hadn’t taken it easy on me, and I loved that and as soon as the ground stopped spinning, I’d kick his butt.   Then I remembered to check my cones. All standing but two of his were down. I shot him a look and he glanced at his course.  

A flicker of surprise crossed his face and I felt a smug sense of satisfaction. He’ d been concentrating so hard on beating me that he’d messed up. 

“Drop and give me twenty, big guy.” 

“You still owe me a lap,” he grumbled, even as he dropped to the turf and started pumping.  

“Count ’em.” For a second I forgot to count as I watched his arms flex with each push up. His triceps were glistening with sweat, and the muscles were corded under his skin. He shot me a look.  

“Six,” he prompted. 

“Right. Sorry. I was gloating.” Then I realized what he’d said.  

“Nice try Jungkook. Two.” He chuckled.  

“No mercy.” But there was a respect in his voice that made me feel good. 

“Like you’re going to let me skip my lap.” I was glad when he grunted his refusal.  

“Not a chance.” 

“Didn’t think so.” 

I sat back on my heels and counted him down, already working on a strategy for my second trip through the cones. Jungkook was pushing me and I was challenging him and it was awesome. He was intense and funny and he took me seriously. 

He treated me like one of the guys, and it was the best feeling ever. None of that girl/guy stuff, just sweat, sports and competition. Exactly how I wanted it. 

An hour and a half later, it was so dark I could barely see the ball, but I wasn’t about to call it and neither was Jungkook. I’d never practiced with someone who was as intense as I was, and it made me try even harder. He’d even set up the drills so it didn’t matter that he was a better player, he was still working as hard as I was. 

I’d done more laps than him, but he’d had to do three and we’d both done so many push-ups that I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be able to lift my toothbrush by the time I got home. Even my legs were trembling but I wasn’t about to admit it, not with Jungkook treating me like a real athlete instead of a pretty ditz. 

I eyed him as I approached him for a little one-on-one, then faked to the left and split right, then tripped. It was too dark to see. I yelped as I landed on the ball, the leather smacking me like a gut punch. I groaned and rolled onto my back, letting my arms flop out to my sides. 

“Ouch.” Jungkook bent over me.  

“You okay?” 

“Yeah.” I struggled to sit up, not wanting to be a wimp, but I was so tired all I wanted to do was lie there in the grass. 

“Want a hand?” He held out his hand, and for a minute I hesitated. Was he trying to make a move? 

“Come on, klutz. Off your butt.” I grinned and grabbed Jungkook’s outstretched hand and let him pull me to my feet.  

“Thanks.” 

“No problem.” He flipped the ball into his hands with his toe.  

“Call it a night?” I didn’t want to, but I knew it was too dark and I was totally beat. 

“Yeah, I guess we should.” 

“Aren’t you tired?” He scooped the other ball up and tossed me one. 

“Not at all,” I lied. “You?” I rested the ball on my hip and we walked back toward the equipment shed. Just me. In the dark. Alone. With a boy.  

I cleared my throat and peeked at him, but he was bouncing the ball off alternating knees with each step. I shook my head. Like I had to worry about anything with him when he was just as single minded as I was when it came to soccer. 

“Not tired” Jungkook said. He still wasn’t looking at me. “You stay late much? I’ve never seen you out here before.” 

“Actually, this is my first time. Coach told me that she was considering bumping me up to varsity in two weeks, so I decided to stay late and do extra practice.” 

“Really?” He caught the ball and started tossing it from hand to hand as he walked.  “Sweet.” I felt a swell of pride at his tone. He got it.  

“Yeah, I’d be stoked to make varsity. I’m going to practice every day ’til she picks.”  

Man, I would love to practice with Jungkook again I’d never been pushed as hard as I’d been tonight and he’d given me some great tips. A few more sessions with him, and I’d be better than Jennie. Well, as good at least. 

We neared the building, the small fl oodlight lighting up his face. The shadows made his cheekbones prominent and his jaw look really angular, kind of strong.  

I suddenly felt intimidated and realized there was no way I’d ask him to practice again. He was on the varsity boys team. A million times better than me, no way was I going to be dumb enough to invite myself into his practice sessions.  

“So, well, thanks for tonight. It was. . .” Was what? Awesome? Hard as heck and the best night of my life? “fun.” 

“Yeah, it was good. It’s good to have some competition.” He caught the ball and gave me a thoughtful look. Not checking me out, not plotting, just normal.  

“You going to be out here again?” I eyed him, trying to figure out what he was asking.  

“I won’t get in your way.” He laughed softly. 

 “I meant, do you want to practice again? It helps me to have someone to go against.” 

Oh, wow. He wanted to practice again? With me? I almost shouted my excitement and then thought of how manic Jennie got around guys. I didn’t want to be like that, didn’t want to make Jungkook suddenly start thinking of me as a girl, so I gave a casual shrug.  

“Yeah, that’d be all right.” He tugged open the door and held it for me.  

“Same time, then?” 

“Works for me.” I slipped past him, then tossed the ball in the corner. Jungkook added his to the pile, then we walked out. He locked the door behind us and we headed toward the gym. We were about halfway to the gym when Jungkook spoke.  

“So, how come you’re not at Pop’s? I thought that’s where everyone went after school.” 

“Not everyone.” I thought of my friends there without me and scowled. He nodded.  

“Yeah, I know what you mean. The guys on the team head over there to check out the girls. I’d rather play soccer.” 

“Really?” I jerked my gaze to his face to see if he was making fun of me. 

He looked totally serious, and my heart soared. “That’s how I feel! My friends just go to hang out with the guys acting really stupid around them. I’d so much rather be out here.” 

Jungkook laughed again, a low sound that rolled through my bones.  

“They can’t be as dumb as my teammates are. It’s like they lose their brains around girls.” 

“What’s up with that?” We laugh at the same time. It was such a relief to talk to someone who thought like I did. I reached the gym door first and I hauled it open. He reached over my head and grabbed the edge.  

“Who knows? I can’t imagine choosing a girl over sports.” 

“I know what you mean!” I ducked under his arm and caught another whiff of his scent. It was all guy, with an undercurrent of soap or something. I liked it. Not that I liked it . . . okay, fine, I sort of liked it, so what? That didn’t mean I was going to turn into Jennie and Sana. 

 I appreciated him as an athlete and a guy who treated me like an equal, that was it. I took another quick inhale before I moved out of sniffing range.  

“I’d pick soccer over the scene at Pop’s any day.” 

“I hear you.” He let the door shut behind us.  

“I guess that means I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

I shoved my sweaty bangs off my face and grinned up at him.  

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m thinking I might go to Pop’s instead. . . .” He laughed.  

“Yeah, right.” He jumped down the four steps leading to the boys’ locker room, then saluted me. 

“See ya around, Y/n. It was nice meeting you.” Then he shoved open the door to the locker room and disappeared. 

I ran all the way down the hall, dancing with excitement. Not only did I have a practice partner, but he felt the same way as I did about our friends and the dating scene. 

Jungkook was just like me in everything, about  Pop’s, about dating, about guy/girls relationship, with him I didn’t have to worry about any of that intimidating stuff.  

I could even make fun of it and he didn’t think I was a freak. Plus, I was going to seriously improve my soccer if I kept practicing with him and that was what really mattered. I was so going to call my dad tonight and tell him about my chance at varsity, and how I was putting in extra practice time. 

I slammed my hip into the locker room door and shoved it open, feeling truly happy for the first time in months. 

Friday night, I found myself sitting between Sana and Jennie at the football game, listening to them detail their night at Pop’s with Jimin and Taehyung. I managed a grin. It did sound like it had been fun but honestly all I could think about was Jungkook. How he was so good with the ball and never missed a beat when it came to it. Obviously they started saying how I should have gone with them 

 “Yeah, well, I was practicing and I met this—” All of a sudden Jennie elbowed Sana and pointed at the entry where they saw Tae and Jimin walk in. For a split of second Jennie looked sad  

“Tae was checking the door for you all night,” she said, almost managing to sound like she didn’t care. “Sana how many times did he ask if Y/n was coming?” 

“Like, a zillion,” she replied. “He was sitting next to the seat we were saving for you and he wouldn’t let anyone sit there.”  The thought of Taehyung waiting for me ended all regret I had at missing out. 

“What’s his problem? Why won’t he stop bugging me?” 

“Because he likes you” Jennie said. “What’s your problem? Why won’t you give him a chance? You’re so lucky. Guys adore you, and you don’t even appreciate it.” 

“Yeah,” Sana sighed. “If I had half your chest, my life would be so much better.”  

I snorted. “Get real, the only reason Taehyung likes me is because I don’t like him back” 

“Shut up Y/n. You’re hot as hell. I’d try to smash you if I was a guy too.” Sana said and  I felt my cheeks heat up like they always did when she started talking like that.  

“Shut up.” 

Jennie leaned on her elbow, twisting around to look at me. “Seriously, do you like him or not? I mean, he seems to think you’re playing hard to get.” 

I rolled my eyes and took a bite of my hot dog. Some questions simply didn’t deserve an answer. She bit her lower lip and looked at Sana. I eyed them, realizing they were hatching some plan. I swallowed too soon, choked, and started coughing. 

“Smooth move, Y/n,” Taehyung hollered from down below. “You want me to give you some lessons on how to eat?” 

I quickly wiped my mouth as Jennie ran her fingers through her hair. “Is my makeup okay?” she whispered. 

“Perfect,” Sana said.  

“Hey, Y/n.” Tae was wearing jeans and a brown leather jacket that was actually pretty sweet. He swung his leg over the bleacher in front of me and straddled it like some cowboy wannabe sitting on his metal horse. 

“Missed you last night at Pop’s.” 

“Yeah, well, sorry I missed out. I heard you were a dead ringer for Britney.” I popped the rest of the dog in my mouth and gave him a ketchup-smirk. 

“I practiced instead you know, that thing where you run around and kick soccer balls? Much more fun.” 

Jungkook and I had practiced after school today as well and it had been awesome. A great workout and nothing else. None of this stupidness. I seriously doubted Jungkook had even noticed I was a girl which was fine with me. 

Tae gave me an obvious once over. “Well, you might have been sweaty yesterday, but you clean up good.” I snorted and rolled my eyes. Didn’t he get that he had a much better chance with me if he appreciated my soccer talents and not my hair? Not that I cared what he thought of me or especially how I looked. 

“So, Taehyungie, when are you going to do a karaoke duet with me?” Jennie tapped his leg with her toe. “You’ve got some serious dance moves.” He grinned and leaned toward her.  

“Anytime, babe. I think we’d be a perfect match.” He slanted a calculating leer at me, like he was hoping I’d be jealous. As if. If she really wanted him, and I couldn’t imagine why she did she could have him. 

I sighed and turned back to the game. Jennie was nearly hanging over my lap in her attempt to flirt with her crush, and Sana had apparently lost her ability to speak. 

Whatever. I totally should have stayed home, watching some Major League Soccer on television or something. I averted my gaze from them, scanning the bleachers for someone to go sit with but then my heart jumped. 

Jungkook was sitting in the next section, a few rows in front of us. It looked like there was a group of guys and girls with him, but he was sitting one row behind them, by himself. He was stretched out, his feet up on the bench in front of him between two girls and he was leaning back, propped up with his elbows on the bench behind him. 

He seemed to be ignoring everyone around him, focused intently on the game. His jeans were faded, his sneakers were hashed, and he was wearing a Red Sox cap backward and a red sweatshirt. It was the first time I’d seen him in anything but shorts and cleats. 

As I watched, he turned his head and looked right at me. I was so surprised that I forgot to turn away and pretend I hadn’t been staring, then he grinned and gave me a nod. Relief rushed through me and I waved back. 

“Who’s that?” Sana asked, sitting up to stare at Jungkook. 

“Who are you waving at?” Tae twisted around to see who I’d waved at. “That guy’s a sophomore. How do you know him?” Jennie shot me a weird look.

“Have you been holding out on us?”I jerked my gaze off Jungkook and fixed the cuff on my jeans.  

“His name’s Jungkook. I practice with him. It’s nothing.” 

“Nothing? He’s freaking hot.” 

Hot? I took another look at Jungkook, who was watching the game again. Really?  

He sweats a lot,” I admitted. “That’s cool, I guess.”  

“He sweats? That’s all you can say?” Jennie whistled. “Are you blind or something? He’s a total smash!” 

“Are you dating him, Y/n?” Tae inquired 

“No! Relax you guys. He plays soccer. So do I, that’s all it is. It is possible to just be friends with a guy, you know?”  

Jennie raised her brows and Sana snorted her disbelief, but Tae grinned and relaxed, then Jennie scrambled over me and plunked herself down next to him. She ran her finger along the sleeve of his leather jacket. “This leather is so soft. Where’d you get the jacket? I love it.” 

I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing. I loved Jennie but she was a total maniac around guys. But Tae didn’t buy into her thing. Instead, he looked up at me.  

“You going to Pop’s after the game?” 

“No. I’m going over to my dad’s.” Well, I was supposed to spend every Friday night at my dad’s, but I hadn’t heard from him this week, even after I’d left him the message about varsity.  I had a feeling I was going to be stood up again. He’d been busy lately. Really busy. Maybe I should go to Pop’s. Might be more fun than sitting home being ditched again and having my mom make chocolate chip cookies . . . again. 

Tae rested his elbow over my knees. “How about tomorrow, then? Want to hit a movie?” 

Jennie made a noise of distress and I felt bad. I knew what she was feeling because that’s how I felt about her and soccer: We both had what the other wanted. Maybe if I helped her with him, she’d cut me some slack with practicing. So I leaned down and looked right at Tae. 

“I’m not playing hard to get, pal. I’m just not interested in dating you.” 

Everyone seatted a the table turned their attention to us. Tae stared at me for a long minute, and I didn’t blink. My eye itched, but I refused to give in. Then a slow grin appeared on his face.  

“Nice try, Y/n, but it’s not going to work.” 

Argh! 

“I’m serious!” I said. He just gave me a sly look, like he was totally on to me, then he turned back to the game and pressed his shoulder against Jennie’s whispering something to her. She immediately bent her head toward him and I felt a flash of sympathy. He wasn’t ever going to like her, was he? She needed to forget about him. 

Taehyung casually leaned back against my knees, like they were a backrest. I pulled my knees to the side and he almost fell over. He raised his brows at me, and I stuck my tongue out at him. 

 “Go lean on Jimin.” 

He smirked, then turned away and slung his arm over Jennie’s shoulders, bending his head next to hers so they could whisper. She giggled, he laughed, and Sana sighed. 

I peeked at Jungkook and he was watching us. I pointed at the back of Tae’s head and made a face and Jungkook grinned at me. I smiled back, then realized Sana was looking at me. 

“What?” I asked. “He’s a friend. That’s it.” 

“No guy who’s that cute can be only a friend.” 

“He’s not that cute! He’s just a guy.” When she rolled her eyes at me, I decided to check out Jungkook again to see if I could see what she was freaking out about, but when I looked down at him, he was standing up talking to Winter, one of the cutest girls in the sophomore class. She had this long, blond hair, a perfect figure, huge blue eyes and so, of course, all the guys loved her. She was also one of those girls who always had perfect makeup and clothes that were right out of the pages of Cosmo or something. 

What was Jungkook doing talking to her? I thought he wasn’t into the girl scene. As I watched, she turned and started walking away while he followed her right down off the bleachers toward the concessions. No way. How could he be into her? She was as girly as they come. 

“So that must be his girlfriend.” Tae sat down next to me with a thump and I turned away from Jungkook and Winter. He brushed his shoulder against mine.  

“I think I’ll sit up here for a bit. You don’t mind, do you?” Jennie was sitting with her back to us, her arms folded over her chest. Her shoulders were tense and I could practically feel her being mad at me. 

“Get away from me.” 

“Because you don’t want him to think we’re together?” 

“Ha. As if I care what he thinks.” At his grin, I suddenly realized I’d given the wrong answer: By telling him I wasn’t interested in Jungkook, he could take that to mean I was available. I felt like smacking myself in the forehead. 

I’d had it with the guy/girl thing. It was going to give me a brain freeze! Tae scooted closer.  

“Give it up, Y/n. You know you like me. Stop fighting it.” 

“Ew.” I shoved him off me and stood up, nearly tripping over Jimin, who was sitting there like a dork, just listening and staring at Sana, who was pretending not to notice he was watching her. 

“I’m going to get popcorn.” Tae stood up. “I’ll go with you.” 

“No!” I started to walk away, then stopped when he started to follow me. “Jennie has something she wants to talk to you about.” Her eyes widened in panic, and I shoved him toward her.  

“She’s been waiting all night to bring it up. Sit and listen.” 

“Um, yeah, see I had this question about . . . um . . . English. Yeah, English.” 

I bailed before Tae could get away from Jennie, jogging down the metal bleachers and heading toward the concessions, my sneakers squeaking with each step. With any luck, the line would be long and I wouldn’t return to my seat until the game was way over. 

I headed for cotton candy, because, well, what was better than cotton candy when I was in one of those moods? I took a quick glance around for Jungkook and Winter, but didn’t see them. So maybe they’d left. Together.  

What was up with that? I folded my arms over my chest and scowled at the back of the head of the girl in front of me. Dark hair, cropped shirt, and low-slung jeans. I felt my eyes widen as I saw the edge of a tattoo peeking out from under the waistband of her pants. There was blond hair and a halo. An angel. My parents would flip if I did that! Unless it was a soccer ball. My dad would probably support that. Assuming I ever saw him again to actually get his permission. 

“Hey, Y/n.” I spun around. “Jungkook?” 

He was standing right behind me, a navy letterman jacket from what must have been his old school slung over his shoulder. His hair was sort of spiky, which was new. It was a good look. I took a quick peek behind him. No Winter. 

“What happened to your girlfriend?” Fuck, had I actually asked that? Like I cared about his life on any level except soccer. 

His brow furrowed and he looked behind him, like he was trying to see what I’d been looking at.  

“What girlfriend?” 

“Winter. I saw you guys talking and . . .” I suddenly realized it sounded like I’d been spying on him. So I shrugged and turned back so I faced the front of the line.  “Whatever.”

He moved next to me, his shoulder brushing against mine and I caught a whiff of the scent I was beginning to recognize as his own. This time, there was no athletic undercurrent. He just smelled clean, sort of like the woods, pine-scented. I grinned to myself. A pine-scented practice partner. How fun. 

“She’s not my girlfriend. Are you kidding? A girl like her? Way too high maintenance.” He grinned. “Plus, she hates sports.” 

“She’s insane.” I suddenly felt much better than I had a few minutes ago, probably because the line was finally moving. He took a step forward as I moved with the line.  

“What about the blond guy sitting with you? Boyfriend?” 

“Ha. He wishes.” 

“Humm.” We were silent for a few minutes, and I watched as a guy came up to tattoo girl in front of me and put his arm around her waist, making some comment about how pretty her hair was. She giggled and leaned into him, fluttering her mascara-laden lashes at him. I snorted and I heard Jungkook stifle a laugh next to me. 

I’d been right about him after all. He was like me. Soccer was our world and dating was for people who didn’t have enough other interesting things to talk about. 

“You getting some cotton candy or what?” 

“No, actually, I’m heading out.” He glanced at his watch. “Got a family birthday to attend. I just wanted to say hey.” 

“Hey back.” I grimaced at how wistful I sounded. So what if I hadn’t had a family since my parents had split up at the start of the summer? Didn’t bother me. “Well, have fun.” 

He nodded. “See you Monday?” 

“You bet. Prepare to run a lot of laps.” 

“Back at ya Y/n .” Then he looked past my head and frowned. “Winter spotted me.” He sighed. “She needs to get a life.” He winced visibly when she shouted his name. “I gotta bail. See you later.” 

And then he was gone. I chuckled as I saw Winter run past me, trying to get Jungkook’s attention. He didn’t run away from me, did he? Nope. Because I was cool and not girly. When I got back to my seat, Tae’s attention didn’t bug me nearly as much as it had earlier in the night.

Go figure

When we were walking to the soccer field for practice on Monday afternoon I was so busy thinking about Jungkook that I totally wasn’t paying attention to where we were going. 

“Wait a second.” Jennie stopped suddenly. “I thought we were practicing with varsity a week from Friday.” 

“We are.” I took advantage of the moment to drop to one knee and crank the laces on my right cleat tighter. My shoes were getting a little too broken in. My dad was the one willing to cough up the dough for the really good cleats, so I’d texted him that I needed a new pair. He must be out of the country or something, because I hadn’t heard from him since before the whole varsity thing had started. 

“Then why are the varsity girls on our field? During our practice time?” I glanced up at our field.  

“Holy cow.” She was right. Varsity girls were there. Now. It was too soon. I wasn’t ready. “They must be finishing up.” Tell me they’re finishing up. 

“God, they’re good,” Sana muttered. “I had no idea how much better they were than us.” 

“They’re not that good,” Jennie scoffed but there was a slight waver to her voice. “I’m right there with them.” 

Coach Merrill was standing next to the varsity coach, and she pointed toward Jennie and me. She and Coach Young turned to look at us, then Coach nodded and wrote something down on a clipboard she was carrying. 

“Oh, no. Not today.” My lungs got tight and a trickle of sweat dripped down my back. I wasn’t ready yet. 

“I think today,” Jennie whispered. “Kathleen and Heidi are already out there" Our competition was already on the field? Not fair. I grabbed Jennie’s wrist. 

“Come on. Let’s find out what’s up.” 

“Right.” We stalked forward, side by side, and I was vaguely aware of Sana running after us. We reached Coach Merrill, but before we could ask, she introduced us to Coach Young, then said,  

“Coach Young wanted an early look at you guys.This isn’t an official tryout, but she wanted to get a sense of where everyone was and see if there was anyone else she wanted to add to the list of potentials.” She nodded at the field. 

“Why don’t you all head down to the goal and take some practice shots?” 

All I could manage was a nod, then I spun around and started jogging toward the goal. My hands were actually shaking.  

“See, it’s not a tryout,” Sana said as we made our way out onto the field. 

“Today doesn’t count for you guys. You’re already on the list.” Jennie and I exchanged glances.  

“Of course it counts,” I said. “It always counts.” A varsity girl jogged up to me. “You’re with me. Come on.” 

I shot a nervous look at Jennie, who gave me a thumbs up, then I followed the varsity girl. She dropped the ball between us.  

“I’m Lisa.” 

“Y/n.” 

“Hey. I’ll play defense. Try to get past me to kick a goal, okay?” I nodded and wiped my palms on my shorts. My footwork was way better after two days with Jungkook. I could handle this. Lisa backed up about ten feet and settled into a defensive stance. I carved the ball with my foot and headed toward the goal. I’d just lean to the right to make her think I was going that way and then I’d go left. . . . She was there and stole the ball in less than a second.

Crud. 

Lisa grinned and kicked it back to me. “Again.” I tried again.  She stole it again. 

And again. 

I wiped the back of my hand across my forehead and glanced over my shoulder. Coach Young was watching us. Come on, Y/n. I lined up again, drew deep on what Jungkook and I’d been working on, and went for it. I made it fifteen feet before Lisa stole it for the fourth time. 

Crud. 

I looked up just in time to see Jennie kick a goal, her varsity defender grimacing as she picked herself up off the turf. Great, just great. As Coach Merrill and Coach Young disappeared into the gym behind the last of the girls, I plunked myself down on the field and dropped my head between my knees. I was beat and completely frustrated. I’d been totally  hosed by Lisa the entire practice and I knew it. I was sunk. 

Jennie was bouncing all over the place, fi red up after her great performance. “You weren’t that bad.” I lifted my head to look at her. She gave me a sheepish smile. 

 “You’ll do better next time, at least. You still have next Friday.” Sana sat next to me and put her arm around my shoulder.  

“And even if you don’t do better and don’t make the team, you can hang out with me on JV. That’s not so bad.” I let out a deep breath. 

 “I love hanging out with you, but I want to make varsity.” I wanted it even more after practicing with the varsity team today and seeing their intensity, but it seemed so much further away now. Like, out of reach. Totally. 

“What’s the big deal with varsity, anyway?” Jennie grabbed her shirt and rubbed the hem of it under her eyes, wiping off her smeared mascara. “I mean, either way, it’s still soccer.” I frowned at her. 

“You’re kidding, right? They’re totally different.” Jennie dropped her shirt back down and started running her fingers through her hair, trying to untangle her dark curls.  

“Yeah, because varsity practices later and if we make varsity, we’ll miss out on time at Pop’s.”  

“Really?” Sana sat up. “You’ll stop going? But what about Jimin. . . and Taehyung?” 

“Well, I was actually thinking about that, you know?” Jennie sat down in front of us and crossed her legs. “I mean, the whole point of doing soccer is to hang out, so if the three of us get split between two teams, then where’s the fun?” She leaned forward, her gaze pinned to my face. 

“I was actually kind of thinking that maybe we should both drop out, since Sana’s not going for varsity. What do you think?” I was too surprised to answer. Drop out of contention for varsity so I could be social? She grinned, a twinkle in her eye I hadn’t seen before, winking at Sana.  

“I saw Taehyung earlier today. He said he and Jimin are going to Pop’s tonight at six to study for the history test tomorrow. You want to go?” I stared at them in disbelief.  

“Are you guys serious? You’re worried about hanging out with them instead of soccer?” 

“Face it, Y/n,” Sana said. “You’re not going to make varsity. Those girls are so good.” I clenched my fists. 

“I can make it. I’ll just work harder.” Jennie rolled her eyes.  

“Y/n, you have to mellow out about soccer. It’s just a game. Who really cares if you make varsity?” 

“I do!” I stood up, unable to take their attitude anymore. How could they not understand how important this was? 

“I’m going to go practice with Jungkook. I’ll see you guys later.” 

“But what about Pop’s tonight?” 

“Can’t do it.” I grabbed a ball and left them in the field, too frustrated even to feel depressed about them going out without me. I mean, I didn’t want to lose them as friends but I wanted varsity too. Why couldn’t they understand it? Jungkook would understand . . . not that I was going to go complain to him, a guy wouldn’t get all upset over a bad practice, and I wasn’t about to go pathetic and girly on him. I’d seen him run away from Winter and there was no way I could take that kind of rejection today. 

He was already on the field when I got there. He’d set up a bunch of cones all over the place in front of the goal. He smiled when he saw me.

"We’re practicing at this end today. Cool?” 

“Yeah. Great.” I dropped my ball at my feet and sighed. Did I really have what it took to make varsity, or was I kidding myself? Was I wasting my time?  Suddenly became aware of Jungkook waving his hand slowly in front of my face.  

“What?” He chuckled.  

“You were totally spacing out. What’s up?” I bit my lower lip to keep myself from blurting it out. I would not become a high-maintenance chick. I was going to be like a guy. Cool.  

His left eyebrow cocked. “Y/n? What’s wrong?” I studied his face for a second, but he didn’t turn away or start doing his hackey sack thing. He was actually waiting for me to answer him. Maybe I should. He would get it.  

“Can I ask you something?” He nodded. 

“Do you think I really have a chance to make varsity? I mean, we had to practice with them today and they were so much better. This one girl kicked my butt all over the field and my stupid friends think it’s not a big deal if I don’t make varsity, and it’s driving me crazy!” He opened his mouth to answer and I smacked my hand over his lips.  

“Tell me the truth. I need to know... Am I wasting my time with this varsity thing? Tell me the truth or I’ll sic Wintr on you, I swear I will!” His skin was warm under my hand, and it sort of distracted me from how upset I was making myself. I cleared my throat. 

“Do you promise to tell me the truth?” At his nod, I moved my hand away. He was smiling again, almost laughing. I scowled.  

“What’s so funny?” 

“You.” I set my hand on my hips. “Why?” 

“Because you’re all insecure and I didn’t think you ever got that way.” Oh, great. Now he was going to blow me off. Too wimpy. Too girly. Too annoying.  

“I’m not insecure,” I snapped. He simply cocked his head and looked at me 

“Honestly, I think a lot of the varsity girls are better than you. . . .” He caught my arm as I started to turn away. “But that’s to be expected. There aren’t any freshmen on the team, are there?” 

I eyed him. “No. Not unless some of us get moved up next week.” He nodded. “See? So, of course, they’re going to be better than you right now. But that’s not the issue. The question is whether you’re one of the top two JV girls, right? Because two girls are moving up, right?” 

“I guess so.” 

“So, that’s all you need to think about. Once you make varsity, you have the rest of the season to catch up to the other varsity girls.” I pursed my lips while I considered his comment. 

“I guess . . .” He did have a point. I could be top two on JV, couldn’t I? He slung his arm around my shoulder and messed up my hair. 

“Y/n, relax. You’re a great player and we have almost two weeks to train.” I froze at the feeling of his arm around me. My shoulder was pressed up against his side, and his whole body was warm against me, and my stomach did a little flip flop. This wasn’t how it felt when Sana or Jennie put an arm around me, this was different. 

He started walking toward the cones he’d set up, keep-ing his arm around my shoulders. Why was he doing that? Had he suddenly decided he liked me? That would be bad. I didn’t like guys like that. Not even Jungkook, who the girls thought was so hot. Was he hot? Were they right? I mean, he wasn’t ugly for sure . . . but hot? 

He dropped his arm, and I sighed with relief. Yeah, relief. But then he put his hands on my shoulders and turned me to face him. Um, hello? Total eye contact. Was this the moment? Was he going to change our relationship and force me to run away from him? 

“Y/n.” I swallowed hard.  

“What?” 

“How bad do you want varsity?” Varsity? That’s what this was about? Good. That’s what I wanted it to be about. Um, yeah. 

“Y/n?” 

“Varsity’s all I want.” He nodded with satisfaction, like he totally heard me. Like he got me. Like I’d said what he wanted to hear.  

“You can make it. I know you can.” I met his determined gaze and felt all the pressure and frustration fall away from me.  

“Yeah, I can.” He grinned. “Then we better get to work, huh?” 

“You’ll help?” 

“Of course.”  

Of course. A warm feeling settled in my belly. Jungkook did get me. Soccer was just as important to him as it was to me. We were a team, kinda.  

“I’ll owe you.” 

“No sweat.” He turned away and headed toward the cones. “Practicing with you helps my game, you know?” 

Of course that was why he was helping me. Because it helped his game, made sense. That was how it should be. See? We were good. It was still just us, doing soccer. I lifted my chin, realizing that I wasn’t feeling bummed out and frustrated about soccer anymore, thanks to Jungkook and I jogged after him.  

“I’ll kick your butt today,” I announced. He shot me a grin as he moved the cones. 

 “You’re so going down, Y/n.” 

“Not even!” I gave him a friendly hip check. “No mercy.” His eyes glittered at me. “No mercy,” he agreed. Then he tossed me a ball.  

“You have to get through all the cones and then kick a goal. Timed, as usual.” 

“Got it.” I took my ball and headed toward my end, not even bothering to get upset that he had a longer course than I did. He was better than I was and that was okay. It didn’t bother him and it didn’t bother me. It simply gave me motivation to kick his butt so he had to make his course shorter.I dropped the ball.  

“Ready?” 

“Set.” 

“Go!” 

And then we were off. Adrenaline surged, my mind focused, and I charged forward, pretending Coach Young was watching me and I was going against Lisa with my varsity spot on the line. Around this cone, that one, to the end and voilà! I slammed my ball into the upper right corner of the net a full half second before Jungkook’s ball did. It was by far the most I’d ever beat him, and I threw my arms up in victory. I laughed at the disgruntled look on his face.  

“What can I say? You inspire me. Take a lap, buddy.” He chuckled and smacked me lightly on the back of the head as he ran by. 

“I’m going to have to stop taking it easy on you.” 

I laughed as I watched him take off. He’d been breathing hard after that run. I’d pushed him, and I’d beat him legit. As I watched him jog around the field, I felt the tension from JV practice ease from my shoulders. Not only did Jungkook get me and help my soccer, but he hadn’t even cared when I’d sort of wigged out on him. He was good for me. 

Then my smile faded as I realized I was watching his quads flex with each step. Watching the ripple of muscles under the skin. I immediately cleared my throat and yanked my gaze off him, totally flustered as I hustled over to take a couple of his cones away. What was wrong with me? We were soccer partners. He didn’t like girls, and I didn’t like guys. That’s why we got along so well, there would be no changing of the rules, even if I wanted to change them.   

Which I didn’t because if I did, soccer practice would be over. I’d seen how he ditched Winter. There was no way I was giving him a reason to do the same to me. I needed him, at least until the tryouts, which meant we were soccer buddies only. 

Which meant no more noticing his quads. You had this Y/n

It was almost dark when I walked out of the locker room after our practice session, after a quick shower. My hair was still wet, but why bother to dry it if I was just going home. Who was going to see it? I jumped down the stairs, humming to myself as I hit the street. 

“Wait up!” I immediately stopped and turned around in time to see Jungkook jogging up behind me. His backpack was over one shoulder, and his gym bag over his other one. His hair was sticking up straight from the shower. 

“What’s going on?” I shifted my weight and fiddled with the strap on my bag. 

“Where are you headed?” He fell in next to me and I started walking again. 

“Home. You?” 

“My brother's picking me up at the ice cream shop down the street. He’s going to be late today, so I figured I’d grab some food there and study ’til he gets here.” 

“That’s on my way home. I walk right past there.” How often did he go there? Had I walked by him other times and not noticed? How weird would that be? 

“You walk all the way home?” he asked. I nodded. “It’s only a ten minute walk. Works for me.” 

We fell silent and I became aware of the sound of his sneakers crunching on the leaves, and I realized I was matching my steps to his. I immediately shifted my gait to a different tempo.  

“So, I liked that new one-on-one drill we did today.” He caught my arm as I was about to cross the street, nodding at a car that was coming.  

“My brother plays college soccer and he told me about it. I asked him for some drills the other night.”  

His hand was warm around my arm and I couldn’t stop myself from noticing. The car passed, he dropped his hand, and headed across the street, still rambling on about soccer. I jogged  after him to catch up, trying to focus on what he was talking about. But all I could think of was the fact that Jennie and Sana thought he was hot. 

And he’d been holding my arm, but who would care about that? 

He stopped suddenly and I almost ran into him. “So we’re here. You going to stop for some ice cream or head home?” 

“Ice cream,” I blurted. “I’m going to have some ice cream.”  

He dropped his bags on the one open bench out front. It was crowded inside, mostly with families and little kids. All the tables were taken both inside and outside, and all that was left was the bench. There was music being piped out from under the green and white striped awning, but I didn’t recognize it. Sounded like the kind of music my parents listened to.  

“I’ll get the ice cream. The guy behind the counter has a brother on the soccer team, and he lets us skip the line. What do you want?” 

“Chocolate with Reese’s peanut butter cups would be awesome.” He grinned as he frowned his brows. 

“No protests of how you’re on a diet and just want water?”  

I snorted. “As if! You really think I’m that kind of girl? I’m totally offended.” 

He batted me softly on the head. “Don’t worry, Y/n, you’re not like other girls. Why do you think I’m hanging with you and practicing with you? If you were like other girls and all into that kind of girl stuff and stalking me, I’d be gone. You’re like . . . a guy with highlights.”   

A surge of warmth went through me.  A guy with highlights had to be the highest compliment Jungkook offered. Guess I didn’t have to worry anymore about whether he liked me. Question answered. I felt so much better knowing he didn’t like me. Really. I felt better. I was pretty sure of it. 

“Swear,” he said. “Now, are you going to save my seat or what?” I put my foot up on the bench as he stood up.  

“I’ll take out anyone who dares take your spot.” 

“Thanks.” He gave me his cute little salute, then ducked inside the store. I sighed and let my head fl op against the wood, but my cell phone buzzed before I could get my thoughts in order. I jerked it out of my pocket, my heart skipping when I saw who it was. I flipped it open. “Dad?” 

“Hey, hon. Sorry I missed our date last weekend.” I picked at a loose paint chip on the bench. “No, that’s fine. Whatever.” It wasn’t like I’d expected him to be there. “Did you get my messages?” 

Jungkook sat down next to me and handed me a ginormous chocolate dipped waffle cone the size of my head. 

“Thanks,” I mouthed. He nodded and took a bite of his equally huge Oreo cookie cone. 

“I didn’t listen to your messages,” my dad said. “I just saw you called so I called you back. Figured it was faster.” I scowled.

“I left those messages days ago.” Jungkook watched me as he took another bite. 

“Now, Y/n don’t get all defensive on me. I’ve been busy and this is my first free moment. Why’d you call?” I took a deep breath and told him about the varsity thing. By the end, I was all excited again. 

“So, anyway, the tryouts are next Friday. You think you can come?” 

“I’d love to, hon. I’ll see if I have any meetings.” My throat tightened. “I really want you to come.” My dad sighed.  

“I know, hon, but you know it’s difficult for me to take time off work during the day.” 

“Yeah, and you can’t take time off at night, either. When can you ever take time for me anymore? You move out of the house and it’s like you moved out of my life. Don’t you even care anymore?” 

“Honey, I said I’ll try to make it, okay? I just can’t promise, you understand” Oh, I understood. “Forget it. Forget I asked. Bye, Dad.” I slammed my phone shut and shoved it in my pocket. 

“Problem with the ’rental units?” Jungkook grabbed my ice cream, which I’d forgotten I was holding, as it tipped precariously to the side. He smiled and held up my waffle cone.  

“Ice cream solves all problems.” I glared at it. So he angled it and popped the end of it against my nose.  

“Sorry.” I snickered and wiped the ice cream off. “You are not.” 

“Sure I am. You better take it before I eat it.” 

“Pig.” But I took the cone and took a bite. It was smooth and chocolaty and tasted awesome. I sighed and let the ice cream roll over my tongue. So what if my dad didn’t care enough to come?  Jungkook leaned back next to me, his shoulder against mine as we ate our ice cream. 

“So, I’m the seventh kid out of seven,” he said after a while. I looked at him to see if he was kidding.  

“Really? That’s a ton.” 

“Swear.” He took another bite of ice cream. “My parents never made it to any of our games. Seven kids was too many, you know? So they said if they made it to some and not others, it would be like playing favorites, so they never went to any.” I swirled my tongue around the ice cream.  

“So?” 

“So, it didn’t mean they didn’t care. That’s all I’m saying.” He broke off a piece of his cone and popped it in his mouth. I bit my lower lip for a minute.  

“You think that’s all it is? That he’s busy?” He shrugged.  

“Once my parents forgot my birthday.” I thought of my birthday next month and wondered if my dad was going to forget. 

 “Did you freak?” He grinned. “I made them feel so guilty for forgetting that they gave me a huge party a week later. I was the only kid in our family ever to get a huge party.” I couldn’t help but return his smile.  

“So, that’s cool.” He nodded. “So, don’t take it personally. Parents have stuff going on. Keep harassing him. He’ll come around.” 

“You think?” I took a bite of my ice cream and thought about it. My dad had said he’d at least try to come. 

“I know.” He raised his brow. “You ever done tears on him? My brothers were brilliant at it.” 

I lifted my chin. “I don’t cry.” He gave a nod of approval. 

“Good. Girls that cry drive me nuts.” He shot me a look, like he was trying to see if I was still bumming. I managed another smile, but it was a little weak. He looked thoughtful for a second like he was planning something. “Is your ice cream good?” 

“Yeah, it’s . . .” I hadn’t even finished talking when he grabbed my wrist and pulled my cone toward him, dropping his head to take a huge bite out of my ice cream. 

“Hey!” He lifted his head, licking the ice cream off his lips.  

“It is good. Want to trade?” I eyed his cone. Oreo cookie was my second favorite kind of ice cream. 

“Can I try a bite first?” 

“Go for it.”  

I bent over and took a bite, but as I was pulling away, he moved the cone suddenly and smushed it against my cheek. 

 “Jungkook!” I batted his hand away, then saw the mischievous look in his eye. “You did that on purpose!” He grinned.  

“Oops. Didn’t mean to do that. Sorry.” 

“You are not!” Oh, this was a battle now! I grabbed his cone and shoved it upward, smashing it into the bottom of his chin and his throat before he realized what I was doing. I cracked up as he jumped to his feet and danced out of my reach, ice cream dripping down his chin and over the front of his sweatshirt.  

“That was so overkill,” he protested. “I barely got you.” 

“What can I say? I’m competitive.” I grinned as I wiped a napkin over my cheek, clearing off the Oreo cookie ice goop.  

“Now that your cone has been shoved in your neck, I don’t really want to trade, but thanks for the offer.” His eyes dancing, he pointed at my throat.  

“There’s some on your shirt.” 

“Really?” Still laughing, I tugged my collar out from my neck and saw a little ice cream around the rim.  

“Good. I’ll snack on it later when I’m hungry.” He chuckled and sat down next to me, crunching on his cone.  

“You know, as girls go, you’re not too bad.” I grinned. “You’re not bad for a guy.” Yeah, like, so not bad. He helped me deal with my dad.  Practice soccer. And he bought me ice cream. And he made me laugh.  And he made me feel good about myself. And he was cute. Not that I cared.  

A red pickup truck suddenly pulled up in front of us and honked its horn. Jungkook jumped to his feet.  

“That’s my ride. Gotta go.” I snickered at the ice cream still dripping down his shirt.  

“You’re just afraid to take me on in an ice-cream battle. Wimp.” 

“Never.” He paused with his hand on the door. “There’s a Major League Soccer game on Thursday night. Any interest in watching it? We can learn a lot from watching their strategy. It’s on cable. We can watch it at my house. My older brother can pick us up after your regular practice and we’ll skip our drilling session. Cool?” 

If he hadn’t already told me that I was a guy with highlights, I might’ve wondered if the invitation to go to his house was actually a pseudo date in disguise. As it was, no biggie. Glad I knew what was up so I didn’t wig out. I nodded. “Should be fine. I’ll check with my mom and let you know tomorrow.” 

“Great. See ya then.” And then he hopped in the truck and was gone. I had just leaned back in my seat and taken a big bite of ice cream when I heard a familiar voice from behind me. “Oh, my God.” 

I turned around to see Jennie standing in the doorway of the ice-cream shop with her little brother. Her parents were still inside, cleaning up the table they’d been sitting at. Even though Jennie was out with the family, she was still dressed up. Makeup, hair, and a cute outfit. I forced myself not to run my hand through my still damp, unstyled hair. 

“Hey, Jen. What’s up?” 

“Did I just hear what I think I heard?” Her blue eyes were wide like, really wide, not just mascara enhanced wide. I shifted against the hard bench and tried to think of what she was talking about. “What?” 

“A date! You have a date with Jungkook!” 

“Oh, that.” I snorted and turned back to my ice cream. 

“Not at all. It’s soccer. We’re going to watch a game.” 

Jennie plunked herself down next to me and yanked my cone out of my hand.   

“Y/n, a guy does not ask a girl to his house unless he likes her. I saw the way he looked at you.” She grinned. “You, my friend, have a date, with a very hot guy.” She took a bite of my cone for emphasis, grinning wider when I scowled at her. 

“Sorry, Jennie, but you’re wrong. We’re just friends.” She cocked her head.  

“You sound like you really believe that.” 

“I know it. He just told me I was like a guy with highlights.” Her eyebrows went up.  

“Really?” I sighed. “Uh-huh.” 

“Ahhhh . . .” She leaned back against the bench. “So that’s it.” 

“So what’s it? Can I have my ice cream back?” She took another bite and then handed it back. “You like him.” 

“Jungkook? No way.” I shook my head hard. Then did it again. “Not a chance.” 

“Give it up, Y/n. How could you not? He’s totally cute and I saw him making you laugh. You guys have been spending how much time together?” She giggled. 

“Y/n has finally noticed the opposite sex. It’s about time! i'm so happy for that!” 

“No.” I said it firmly. “Our friendship is based on the fact that neither of us is into the dating thing. If I liked him, then he’d bail on me, so even if I was thinking of liking him, it would be stupid and I wouldn’t do it.” 

Would I? No. Of course not. The fact that I could still remember what he smelled like didn’t mean I liked him. Jennie was wrong. So what if he was cute and made me laugh? I didn’t like him. 

I. Didn’t. Like. Him. 

She gave me this look that told me she wasn’t buying it, but all she said was,  

“Want to come to Pop’s Friday night? The boys said they might be there, so I’m trying to talk Sana into going, but she’s been wigging around Jimin ever since I told her he likes her.” She must have noticed my expression, because she added, “Please? I bet Tae will come if you’re there. Just stay ’til he comes and then you can leave, if you want.” 

I couldn’t keep from grimacing. That didn’t sound like my favorite way to spend a Friday night. “I don’t think so. Why don’t you and Sana just come over to my house and we can watch movies?” 

“Please?” She put her head on my shoulder and sighed. “I’ll owe you forever.” I snorted at the tone in her voice.  

“Why are you so into Taehyung?” Her face immediately lit up.  

“I like how he makes me feel.” 

“Really? But he barely even talks to you.” 

She lifted her head, shaking it vigorously. “Only when you’re there. When it’s just us, he’s so nice. He makes me laugh, he compliments me and makes me feel good about myself, and he even listens when I complain about whatever’s bugging me.”  I stared at her, an eerily familiar feeling coming over me.

“He does?” That was how it was with Jungkook, but that was because we were just friends, right? She got this dreamy look on her face.  

“Totally.” 

“Wow.” I sat back, my fingers tight around my cone. “I had no idea that it was like that between you guys.” I also had no idea that it was the same as it was between me and Jungkook. Did that mean I liked him? No. It didn’t. It couldn’t. I would lose everything if I were stupid enough to like him. 

“So, you’ll help?” She sat up suddenly, an eager look on her face. “Will you tell Tae that you’re dating Jungkook?” I jumped up in horror. “No!” 

“Why not? You said you don’t like Tae. But you do, don’t you?” I shook my head. “No, no, that’s not it. It’s just that I don’t want to say I’m dating Jungkook. What if it got back to him? He’d flip!” She relaxed and gave me a speculative look. 

“Maybe he’d start thinking of you as more than a guy with highlights.” 

“Which would be bad.” She lifted her brows. 

 “Would it?” 

“Yes.”  

It would. So how come I suddenly couldn’t stop thinking about it?

[dahlibae]

hiii i really really love your writing and your blog!! it’s so so pretty <33. i also adore your mommy wanda :). some ideas! (as per your latest post)

I literally cannot stop thinking about coming home drunk to mommy wanda after being out with your friends, and being so so affectionate with her and wanting to kiss her all night. she wants to get you to bed because it’s late and you can be stubborn, and somewhere along the way you tell her you’re wet. just her undressing you and you sweetly showing her how wet you are and how badly you want her, even though you’re too drunk for sex. she tries to soothe you and cuddles you to sleep despite your whines and whimpers as you fight bedtime.

hii nonniee! ehh thank you, you’re so sweet hehehe. i love writing for mommy wanda so much, she’s just so kind and pwetty and lovin! :3

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

yes! to follow from your idea… you’d literally be like bambi, stumbling over your feet as you make your way into the house. wanda would notice your arrival and make her way down the stairs when she finally catches sight of you, and to her, you look sooo adorable! your cheeks flushed and eyes glassy from both alcohol and the cold night, as you struggle with an ice cream container, mumbling under your breath about, “how stupid it is to put lids on ice cream.” actually, she should be reprimanding you for trying to eat ice cream at this time. it was one of mommy rules… you can have only one bowl of ice cream a day before bed, and you already had todays before you went out. but she can’t help but laugh at your antics and when you finally notice her, you’ve suddenly lost all interest in the ice cream, placing it against the countertop along the way to run into her already open arms. wanda’s nose would crinkle at the smell of alcohol lingering on you and yet she’d still bury her face into the top of your hair, inhaling your scent - her own shampoo and conditioner - deeply.

“did you enjoy hanging out with your friends?” she’d ask, and you’d pull away slightly, reaching on your tiptoes with a small pout on your face as you lean in… clearly you were feeling not all that talkative and very clingy. wanda ofc wouldn’t be able to resist, and so, she’d place a chaste kiss to your lips before attacking your cheeks, and your nose, and your chin… and you’d step out of her grasp, your girlish giggles quickly becoming little hiccups, so she’d take the initiative to grab your hands, “cmon baby, let’s get you to bed huh?”

the move from the kitchen to the bedroom would be a bit of a blur for you, considering you managed to walk into the walls a few times… and wanda - failing to hold her laughter back - had to carry you the rest of the way. safely in your room, she’d try to put you down on the bed but you wouldn’t have it, clinging even tighter to the tall woman as you whined your dislike into the crook of her neck. she’d try to steady you, her voice soft but firm, telling you that, “it’s time for bed,” but you’re stubborn, leaning into her warmth, murmuring about how much you love her, how much you need her right now. you’d shiver, heat instead of the earlier cold now spreading through your chest, and somewhere in your rambling, you begin to tug at the waistband of your skirt, tugging the material down your legs as far as you could.

wanda obviously knew you were wet. she could practically feel you, your drenched panties doing nothing to protect you, but she knew now wasn’t the time... her baby needed to rest! and so, she managed to set you down, fingers working quick to undress you, and your touches grew more insistent, lips brushing against her jaw, your voice a sweet but needy whisper, telling her how badly you want her, how you’ve wanted her all night and can’t wait any longer. she’d hush you, hands warm and soothing as she tucks you under the duvet and a mountain of blankets, promising that, “you’ll have all of tomorrow to play with mommy.”

and despite your whines and little protests, she’d manage to get you settled, holding you close as you snuggle into her, fingers occasionally wandering, your lips pressing sleepy kisses to her bare skin. she’d stroke your hair, her voice soft, as she murmurs for you to go to sleep, her patience endless as she calms you with gentle reassurances. eventually, the warmth of her embrace and the soothing rhythm of her voice would lull you into a deep sleep. your stubbornness melting away as you finally surrender to rest in her warm arms.

[twistedteatime]

Super Soldier Theater: The Little Mermaid

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve Rogers x Reader, Stucky x Reader. It's not specific. No pronouns assigned to Reader past "you".

Summary: Bucky Barnes missed out on a lot while being controlled by HYDRA. Steve Rogers missed out on even more being frozen in ice. Since Sam has made it his mission to update them on music, you decide that it's your job to update them on what they've missed out on in cinema.

Chapter Summary: Deciding that the guys need a break from blood, monsters, and people getting eaten you decide that it's time to start them on Disney's animated movies. So, naturally, you choose The Little Mermaid. Nothing horrifying happens in that...right?

Word Count: 6.5K

Warnings: Mild Language (Steve will deal), warnings that come with The Little Mermaid, Bucky and Steve questioning logic and people's intelligence, Strong reactions to Ursula, Alpine being angry, other stuff I probably forgot.

A/N: Yeah...this...took a turn. Poll for the next movie is at the end. If you notice typos along the line of he instead of the or is instead of his, like a word out of place. It's my keyboard. I do not support my work being put into AI in any fashion

Ao3 Link: Super Soldier Theater: The Little Mermaid

Series Masterlist🍿MASTER Masterlist

Previous Movie:Jaws

Next Movie: Monty Python & The Holy Grail

You needed a break from MythBusters.

You didn’t regret introducing them to the show, but you needed a break from it. Reluctantly they agreed when you promised them it was going to be something completely different. Something classic and kid friendly.

Disney animation. The Little Mermaid to be exact.

You had debated starting with a different movie. Not Snow White. They were familiar with that. You contemplated starting with The Aristocats but decided against it after the mission they’d come back from and after deciding you didn’t need them trying to off the butler by dismantling the tv screen. Same thing with 101 Dalmatians.

Someone making a Poor Unfortunate Souls reference that they didn’t get was what tipped the scales towards The Little Mermaid for you. The fact that it was animation intrigued them both from the moment you mentioned that it was Disney. Still it took a few days for you all to actually be able to sit down and watch it together due to the mission debriefings that kept postponing movie night.

“Finally…a night at home…” Steve sighed as he put his feet up with his bowl of popcorn on one side of you while Bucky nodded with his Cracker Jack box on the other, “That mission was just…”

“Stupid.” Bucky said while handing you the remote.

“It was necessary, Buck.” Steve said but nodded when Bucky looked at him silently, blue eyes locked on blue eyes with a flat, unflinching gaze, “I could have gone without the crazy ferry boat guy trying to hide the explosives in a gas can stuffed with crawfish singing about crustaceans, though.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t jump on it.” You said and Steve sighed.

“The grenade was a dummy.”

“Don’t act like you haven’t jumped on anything else since then.” Bucky replied and you nodded in agreement while getting the movie started and Steve just licked his lips and sighed while shaking his head.

“Alright, enough. Time to watch the movie. Same rules as always. This is Disney so it’s different from the original tale written by Hans Christian Anderson by…a lot, but…it’s got music, pretty animation, and romance. There’s also a very fluffy dog.”

“Mao!” Alpine meowed from her perch on the couch and you reached over to pet her gently.

“You’re better, sweetie, and you know it.” You said, smiling as she purred, “Alright. Ready?”

They nodded so you hit play and relaxed, watching the opening castle sequence and waiting to see how long it’d take before you had to hit pause. You had a feeling you knew when and you weren’t wrong.

Their delighted fascination at the images dancing across the screen before them soon shifted to a glance of expectant knowing on Steve’s face and one of mischievous teasing on Bucky’s when Sir Grimsby’s green seasick face came on screen.

You paused.

“Get it out of your system.” Steve sighed and Bucky chuckled.

“That’d be you on that ship.” He said and Steve just rolled his eyes but nodded.

You said nothing and hit play again.

They were soon enraptured with the animation again. The colors, the fluidity, and the music. It was calming and they watched silently. Relaxed.

Then the seahorse herald announced King Triton’s arrival with his dolphin chariot lighting the chandelier in front of an ecstatic crowd. Steve narrowed his eyes thoughtfully. You weren’t entirely sure what was going to come out of his mouth but you knew it was something. Really you should have expected it.

“Why are those dolphins like horses but the seahorse has the frill thing?” he asked and you shut your eyes while silently chuckling and shaking your head.

“Because it’s Disney, Steve.” You said but Bucky had his own answer.

“Because you’d probly need 300 of those seahorses to pull Triton instead of three dolphins.” He said and Steve nodded.

You just shook your head and hit play again.

They watched the seahorse announce Sebastian excitedly then laughed when his fanfare was then played with a chorus of kazoos. The goldfish pulling him neighing like horses made Steve gesture at the TV again while Bucky narrowed his eyes and nodded in agreement.

“Disney.” You repeated and they gave up for the moment, watching the king and crustacean talk.

“What exactly is Sebastian?” Bucky asked while leaning over.

Steve answered.

“I think he’s a crab.” He said and you nodded and hit play so they could listen to Sebastian compliment Triton’s daughters and Ariel’s singing before complaining about Ariel not showing up to rehearsals.

You then stopped them from asking about how there was paper underwater, reminding them it was a cartoon before they silenced themselves to listen to the song Triton’s daughters sang. All with A names that the pair didn’t comment on.

They did comment on the huge empty clam shell opening up and Sebastian’s face in response along with Triton’s reaction. You paused, knowing this was going to be a more longwinded thing judging by Bucky’s face.

“They remind me of that one teacher we had whenever Steve would get into a fight in school.” He said and Steve thought and nodded.

“Yeah. Panic then anger, but it wasn’t my fault and you didn’t help.” He said and Bucky looked at him.

“Next time you ever have to go back in time make sure you tell my younger self to let you get flattened by Big Jim Bunson and every other guy in school.” He retorted.

“Don’t start.” You warned and pressed play when they nodded so you could watch the introduction of Ariel and Flounder.

They totally agreed with Flounder when he panicked about sharks. Then they stared in horror when it came into view. You mentally sighed.

You forgot about the shark scene.

“I feel so bad for Flounder…” Bucky said and Steve nodded before they both just stared dumbfounded at the screen when Ariel found the fork.

“Have you ever seen anything so wonderful in your entire life?!”

“Yeah.” Bucky said, “S’called a fork.”

Steve nodded and looked at Flounder when he questioned what it was before looking at Ariel when she said she didn’t know, “It’s basically the same shape as you fathers tri-the shark is outside.”

“Hmm…I wonder what this one is?”

“You have worse self-preservation instincts than Steve.” Bucky while shaking his head and Steve was too busy staring wide-eyed at the shark looming up behind Flounder in the window.

They watched carefully, and tensely, as the shark attacked and the chase scene began. Predictably they both yelled at Ariel when she went back for her bag with her things in it. They were relieved at the end when they got away.

They watched Scuttle, both arching an eyebrow but you waited until they looked at you when he declared the fork to be a dinglehopper. You remained silent and just smiled when they looked at you again when the bird described what the “dinglehopper” was used for. Then you paused.

“She has hair.” Steve said and you nodded.

“Her sisters have hair done up in hairstyles.” Bucky said and you nodded again.

“Do they not have combs?” Steve asked and you shrugged.

“I don’t know. I’m not a mermaid.” You replied and hit play and then pause again after Scuttle “explained” the use of the pipe and dated it back to prehistoric times when humans just stared at each other all day.

“I am so glad Sam isn’t here right now.” Bucky said and looked at you sternly when you smirked, “Don’t even say it.”

“Mm…I’ll be merciful. For now.” You smiled and Steve snickered before they watched as Ariel remembered the concert finally and took off.

At least until Flotsam and Jetsam showed up with their glowing eyes and Ursula made her first appearance.

Bucky shook his head back and forth at the screen, “No.”

“She’s a cartoon character, Bucky.” You soothed and he shook his head.

“No. I don’t like her. She’s evil. Why the tentacles?” He asked and Steve looked at you before he kept going, “Did they know? I doubt HYDRA would let themselves be portrayed as evil. I don’t remember anything to do with Disney.”

“Calm…breathe. It’s a children’s movie…” you soothed and he looked at you.

“She’s nightmare fuel!”

“She’s half calamari.” You replied and he calmed down with a deep breath, chuckling as Steve did when they both remembered what you had dubbed the HYDRA logo back when they first met you.

Calamari on Skull Island.

“Yes, she’s evil, but…it’s a Disney movie. They only stopped making the villains obviously different in recent years and they still actually kinda do that so…Ursula.” You continued and he nodded before letting you hit play again.

They watched as Triton scolded his daughter and as Sebastian helped him do so before Flounder attempted to defend her only to get her into more trouble when he mentioned the crazy seagull.

“What’s he got against humans?” Steve asked you and you paused when Ariel swam off upset with her father.

Bucky nodded, “Yeah, I mean…I get we kind of suck but it’s not that great and safe in the ocean. You got Jaws’s relative and then the tentacle lady. Not exactly safe.”

You paused to answer, thinking about it for a moment on how, “Well…it’s kinda complicated. This movie has sequels. Disney sequels…kind of have a reputation as being…crap compared to the originals. Some aren’t as bad as others. One of the ones for this explains why he hates humans so I’m…a bit torn on telling you outright. I’m leaning towards no because I want you both to see this as I did. The sequels took a good while to come out so Triton hating humans was just a thing for a long time that people theorized about.”

They nodded and accepted that answer. Pressing play again you all watched as Triton sighed, moped, and Sebastian complained about teenagers. It also allowed them a moment to see Triton as a concerned father, though you knew what was coming was going to trigger some thoughts from both.

Until that moment, though you watched them both stare flatly at the screen when Sebastian went off on what he’d do if Ariel was his daughter. Then they nodded when Triton thought before shaking their heads when he assigned Sebastian to keep an eye on Ariel.

“Saw that coming.” Bucky said and you and Steve both nodded then watched as Sebastian caught Ariel sneaking off with her bag and followed her, “It is so weird watching him swim…”

“Yeah…” Steve nodded as they watched him swim into Ariel’s grotto and stare at all the human stuff while Ariel sulked.

“I just don’t see things the way he does. I don’t see how a world that makes such wonderful things…could be bad.” She said; Bucky didn’t miss a beat.

“Try living in it.”

“SHH!” Steve shushed him when Ariel started singing.

You were surprised when they both just watched, listened, and thought. Quite honestly you were expecting some sort of comment but they both sat, listened, and watched. At least until you understood that it connected with them in two different ways…but that thought was quickly displaced.

“I betcha on land, they understand, they don’t reprimand their daughters. Bright young women, sick of swimmin’, ready to stand!”

“No.” both of them said shaking their heads and you sighed and paused.

“What?” Bucky asked blinking at you, “We all know that’s not what it’s like. ‘Specially back in the 40s.”

“Yeah. I mean…it’s better now but c’mon.” Steve said, “We’re adults and we get yelled at all the time. Sure we’re men but look at what Nat’s had to go through.”

“Yelena.” Bucky added.

“Peggy was far from typical for the day.” Steve added and Bucky nodded as did you.

“I know, but Ariel’s a teenager idealizing a world she’s fascinated with. Y’know…grass is always greener type of thing? Movie?” you reminded them and they nodded before allowing you to hit play again.

They returned to watching the rest of the musical sequence, enjoying it until Sebastian crashed into everything and started freaking out. Then they watched as she spotted the boat passing overhead and swam off, completely ignoring Sebastian. The question that came next was one that got you pretty good.

“Wait. It’s nighttime?” Steve asked and you nodded slowly, “How’s there light under the water then?”

“Yeah. I thought it’d be daytime. Sure it’s murky but…it’s underwater.” He said and you blinked.

It wasn’t exactly something you’d paid attention to, still you just shrugged and answered as simply and honestly as you could, “Movie logic.”

They nodded and let you hit play again to watch as Ariel surfaced and stared in wonder at the fireworks before swimming towards the boat. Comments on her self-preservation instincts followed. Then comments on the dog when Alpine meowed at the screen.

“C’mere, Al.” Bucky soothed and scooped her up to put her on his lap and pet her, “You’re better.”

“Mao.” She replied and purred, watching with him when Ariel spotted Eric and instantly fell in love.

Then Scuttle showed up.

“Is that seagull drunk?” Bucky asked and Steve thought for a moment.

“The seagull sounds familiar.” He said and Bucky nodded.

“Y’know…yeah. Rewind it.” He said and you rewound it to play the seagull again, and then again, “This is gonna drive me nuts…”

“Leonard Hacker.” Steve said and Bucky nodded, “He was enlisting about the same time we were. He’s not drunk it’s just how he talks.”

You googled it and nodded, “Yeah, Buddy Hackett was his stage name. Served three years in an anti-aircraft battery.”

Bucky nodded, “Alive?”

“No. He passed in 2003.” You explained and they shook their heads.

“Shame.” Bucky said and Steve nodded and you hit play again to let them watch Ariel swoon over Eric then watch Sir Grimsby introduce Eric’s statue of a very over the top statue before complaining about Eric not being about to get married, “I take it back. He’s not you, Steve. He’s Sam.”

“He’s Nat if she got seasick and was a man.” He replied and you shook your head at them then listened to Eric say that when he finds the girl of his dreams he’ll know.

“It’ll hit me. Like lightning.” He said and the clouds in the distance started flashing.

“Hurricane acomin’!”

You saw various questions on their faces when the hurricane was announced yet they didn’t say anything. They simply shook their heads and watched as the storm battered and hit against the boat and the sailors before it suddenly ran aground.

“Y’know. He’s goin’ back for his pet. He’s alright.” Bucky said before sighing as the screen focused on the powder barrel, “Of course they’re gonna blow him up.”

You bid your time and held your tongue. You knew you’d get your opportunity soon.

“Well, at least Ariel’s saving him. I mean, he should be in worse condition than that but…it’s a Disney movie.” Steve said and you nodded while watching the scene shift to the beach where Ariel was tending to Eric, “Okay, how’d she get him all that way out of the water?”

“Probly durin’ high tide and then just…kept hold of him. Or she’s stronger than she looks. She’s a mermaid.” Bucky replied and Steve nodded, eating some of his popcorn before choking on it as he laughed at Scuttle peeling Eric’s eye open then listening to his foot for a heartbeat.

Bucky laughed with him as well and you couldn’t help joining them even as Ariel started singing happily again when Eric started breathing. They calmed as Eric started coming around. Then, when the shot of Ariel looking down at Eric with the sun behind her came on…you couldn’t help yourself.

“So when Steve rescued you from the HYDRA base in Austria was that what he looked like with the light?” you asked and Bucky looked at you while Steve tried not to laugh again.

“I thought I was hallucinatin’ and then I was very confused because he was tall.” He answered and you nodded, smiling, “You’re up to somethin’…I know that smile.”

“Yeah…” Steve said slowly; you just smiled more and kept silent while hitting play.

The urge to point out the similarities between them and Eric and Ariel was strong, but you resisted. For now at least.

They let it go for the moment, watching Grimsby tease Eric about drinking too much sea water. Watching them watch Sebastian go on about forgetting the whole episode they’d been through so he’d stay in one piece you knew a comment was coming as it went in one ear and out the other with Ariel.

Bucky shook his head and glanced at you, “You’re saying Ariel is Steve…and y’know what? I agree. Talkin’ to him about not doing something dangerous is like talking to a brick wall. That whole thing. That was me back in the 40s tryin’ to keep him out of trouble. In one ear out the other.”

“What?” Steve asked with a smile that smile he wore whenever he was being purposely difficult and Bucky just shook his head while rolling his eyes and turning back to the screen when you unpaused it then paused it again when Ariel sang as Eric and Grimsby walked away, “They can’t hear that?”

“Apparently not.” Bucky answered and took a bite from his Cracker Jack box and you hit play again instantly causing him to scowl as the eels showed up and Ursula returned and started gloating about how easy it was before it showed her “garden”, “Ugh…what the hell did she do to them?”

“I don’t know, Buck, but it’s not right.” Steve said scowling at the screen.

“That entire lady isn’t right.” Bucky said and they watched the scene shift to Ariel with her sisters and the one announcing to their father that Ariel was in love, “Huh…”

“Triton took that well.” Steve said and the scene shifted to Sebastian pacing back and forth while Ariel daydreamed and picked petals to determine whether Eric loved her or not, “Well at least she has a plan.”

Bucky nodded then watched Sebastian try to get Ariel to stop daydreaming about Eric before the next music number began. They watched and listened, nodding with Sebastian reminding Ariel that the fish got eaten on the surface. All while Ariel went on unimpressed.

They continued watching as Sebastian went on about all the different fish and Flounder whispered some sort of plan. Sebastian was clearly having fun and they were clearly enjoying the animation and music, but neither were surprised when it ended with Ariel missing.

“Yep.” Bucky nodded, “I know how that feels. Enjoyin’ yourself…then you look over and…where’d they go?”

Steve said just pointed at the screen as it showed Triton happily imagining who the lucky merman to get his daughter was, “Shh.”

Bucky shook his head and scratched Alpine on the ears when she nudged his hand for attention. They both watched Triton question Sebastian and Sebastian try, and fail, not to panic or say anything.

They both then tilted their heads at the sight of the statue in Ariel’s grotto.

“This reminds me…” Bucky started and Steve sighed, “Yeah. Of that one weapons dealer that had a shrine to you.”

“Look, I know it was weird…but…well it was weird and yeah. It does.” Steve said and gestured at the screen, “I wanna know something more important. How’d Flounder get that statue into the grotto? It sinks so it’s obviously heavy.”

You knew he was just trying to divert the attention off of that particularly strange and somewhat uncomfortable mission, but you paused anyway. Bucky was nodding in agreement with him. They were also both looking at you.

“Disney…” you reminded them and they looked at you, eyebrows raised, “Look I don’t know how Flounder got the statue into the grotto. I don’t think it’ll even fit through the skylight. It’s a cartoon. For all we know he had a bunch of his family help him move it. Just watch the movie and stop questioning cartoon logic.”

They both nodded and you hit play. They grimaced at the sight of Triton watching his daughter swim about and cling to the statue of Eric. They watched the argument that took place, both shaking their heads.

Then they both scowled when Triton charged up the trident and destroyed all of Ariel’s treasures. Then Bucky scowled even more when the eels showed up and started talking.

“No.” he said and Steve looked at him.

“I mean, I can see how she’s tempted.” He said and Bucky looked at him scowling, “It’s not the same.”

“Of course you’d see how she’s tempted.”

“Don’t you two start arguing.” You said and hit play and they watched Ariel swim off with the two eels and Sebastian try to stop her.

“I agree completely with everything the crab says about Ursula. Stay the hell away from Tentacle Lady.” Bucky said and groaned when Ariel told the crab off, “Of course.”

“Well at least he’s not giving up.” Steve said and they looked at Ariel’s lair, “Okay she has an evil villain lair.”

“Yeah…that’s not creepy or a warnin’ sign.” Bucky added while petting Alpine, “She’s livin’ in the skeleton of a giant sea dragon thing. Sure. Totally fine. The shriveled-up husks of the Sea Witch’s victims are trying to stop you and you keep on going because this is such a good idea.”

You just let Bucky complain as Ursula talked and you looked at both him and Steve when she started singing. They both scowled. Then they gave her a new name.

“Zola.” They both said and you paused the movie while looking at them and they gestured at the screen.

“You can’t say we’re wrong.” Steve said, “HYDRA scientist. Got arrested. Given a reprieve by the government to start over and work for them. Still completely devoted to HYDRA and evil the whole time.”

Bucky nodded, “Yeah. ‘Oh, Sargent Barnes, you look so weak and tired, here let me strap you to this gurney and make you feel all better with my homebrewed super soldier serum’. That is Madam Zola.”

“She’s a cartoon character, boys.” You reminded them, hit play, then paused again when Ursula gave Ariel three days.

“Three days?!” Steve asked and you nodded.

“Same amount of time in the original story.” You said and they shook their heads and shook their heads when Ursula asked if she and Ariel had a deal.

They then shook their heads again when she asked for Ariel’s voice as payment. They watched in horror as Ursula made the potion while going on about how Ariel wouldn’t need her voice because human men really only wanted quiet women that were pretty and dumb. Both just shook their heads with sighs yet before they could say anything about that they were both face palming when Ariel signed the contract.

The wide-eyed look on their face while Ursula cackled insanely, shaded green on the tv was almost comical. Alpine hissing at the screen was, but you managed to hold it in

They watched as Sebastian and Flounder rushed Ariel to the surface after she was turned human. Alpine watched as well, meowing when the dog Max appeared on the screen again as Eric daydreamed about Ariel’s voice. Steve’s eyes narrowed.

“He’s not gonna recognize her because she can’t talk.” He said and you smiled.

“Mmmm…maybe.” You said and they watched as Ariel marveled over her feet and toes.

Then they shook their heads as Scuttle arrived and tried to guess what was different about her until Sebastian blurted it out angrily then began freaking out and panicking. They watched as he slowly understood when Ariel looked at him before agreeing to help her. Then raised their brows when Scuttle said he was going to dress Ariel like a human.

“Oh this’ll be good.” Steve said and Bucky nodded, petting Alpine when she cuddled into him more as Max barked, “Just a cartoon dog, Al.”

“Mao.” She replied and Bucky nodded.

“Not real.” He said and nodded at what Scuttle dressed Ariel in, “I was imagining much worse actually.”

“Yeah.” Steve nodded, “So was I.”

You nodded in agreement and watched as they watched while Eric discovered Ariel and she smiled at him excitedly.

Then you waited as Eric looked at her, staring into her eyes as if he had a revelation only to say she looked familiar as he looked at her thoughtfully. Thoughtfully but cluelessly and obviously not remembering the person that saved his life.

“Have we met?”

Steve looked at Bucky. Bucky hit the pause button himself and looked at Steve and then you. You tried not to smile, but it was a lost cause.

“Yeeessss?” you asked and he licked his lips, eyes narrowed as he gathered his thoughts and Steve just smiled slowly and full of amusement that bordered on mischief mixed with retribution.

“I’ll get you for this.” He said and you blinked at him as innocently as you could, “Don’t give me that. You’re both telling me that I’m Eric.”

“Yes.” You nodded and smiled more, “And if you start trying to get me back for it…we’re gonna watch Alien next and that will give you nightmares.”

“We already know aliens exist.” Bucky said and you tilted your head with a smile.

“How about the kind that burst out of your chest after hugging your face against your will?” you asked and he looked at you in horror, “Yeah…so…shush and watch the nice animated cartoon movie where you get to be an oblivious prince and Steve is a sheltered mermaid that thinks forks are hairbrushes.”

Steve laughed until he scowled, “I am not Ariel.”

“You are so Ariel.” Bucky retorted and you hit play so they could watch Ariel and Eric interact and watch her try to pantomime an explanation to him that she lost her voice before falling into his arms, “Yep. You.”

“Shut up, Eric.” Steve retorted and Bucky scowled at him.

“Knock it off.” You said with a smile, “Ariel.”

They both quieted down so you hit play again, the scene with Ariel enjoying her first bubble bath playing out with Sebastian being subjected to a scrubbing board and then being flattened. They both grimaced at it then tilted their heads when he was just flattened. A look from you silenced them, causing them to nod and mumble “cartoon, right” before watching as Sebastian landed in the kitchen.

“Oh no…” Steve said and you smiled as Sebastian fainted at the sight of stuffed crabs.

They then watched as Eric argued with Grimsby before staring in awe at how pretty Ariel was when she was presented to him. They nodded as he pushed her chair in for her, clearly approving, then they both shook their heads when she started to use the fork to brush her hair and blew into the pipe. What really got a reaction from them was hearing the chef’s “special” was.

“Stuffed…”

“Crab?”

“Yep.” You smiled, “And now the musical number Les Poissons. Queue the crazy French chef guy singing about how much he loves fish and cooking them…with murderous glee.”

“What?” they both asked and you just pointed at the screen.

They jumped as he started chopping up the fish with hard zealous strikes of his cleaver. Faces contorted in confused horror while Sebastian nearly puked at the sight of it. Looking at them you could see they felt sorry for the crab.

Looking at Alpine you could tell she was getting hungry.

“Hee hee hee…”

“Haw…haw…haw…”

You snickered but didn’t pause.

“Zut Alors! I have missed one!”

“Run Sebastian! Run!” Bucky said and Steve nodded.

“Guy loves his job but there’s something not right in his head.” Steve added, eyes wide as the chef started to prepare the little crab and stuff him, “He’s still alive!”

“Eh? What is this? Oh!”

They both jumped as the music shifted and Sebastian began fighting back and trying to escape. Heads bobbed to the music as smiles spread across their faces. At least until Louis the chef dove headfirst towards Sebastian with the cleaver in his hand.

“I think I’d better go see what Louis is up to.”

“You really don’t want to do that, ma’am.” Steve said and Bucky shook his head.

“No…it’s…gonna be bad.” He said and flinched at the mess depicted in the next scene then stared Steve at the sight of the chef’s torn clothes and disheveled appearance, “You need a new job.”

“I hope they’re not gonna serve her fish…” Steve said they watched Eric gaze at Ariel and Bucky smiled.

“See. He recognizes her. He’s not me.”

“Mhmm…” you nodded, knowing fully well what was gonna happen later and they watched Sebastian scamper across the table into Ariel’s dish she slammed shut before agreeing to join Eric on a tour of his kingdom the next day.

“Wonderful! Now let’s eat before this crab wanders off my plate!” Grimsby said with a smile.

“Too late.” You all said at the same time and laughed lightly then watched Ariel gaze down at Eric playing with his dog only to wave shyly and retreat bashfully into her room when he noticed her.

“And she’s still using the fork to brush her hair…” Bucky said and listened to Sebastian talk about the day being the single most humiliating one of his life then watched Ariel sink into the bed.

Both Steve and Bucky nodded but otherwise were silent while listening to Sebastian go on about what to do the next day to Ariel to get Eric to kiss her. That’s when the silence ended.

“Crabs don’t have lips.” Steve said and Bucky looked at him.

“Cartoon.” He reminded him and nodded when seeing that Ariel was asleep, “Yep. She takes advice as well as you do, too.”

You just shook your head at the two, “Don’t start.”

They nodded and watched as the seahorse ran back to Triton, reporting that they couldn’t find Ariel or Sebastian anywhere. They were clearly conflicted about how they felt about Triton at this point. Seeing a need for them to voice this you paused on the image of Triton sitting on his throne regretfully.

“You lost your temper is what you did.” Bucky said and Steve nodded.

“Yeah, after being a racist jerk, but…I have to give it to him…he at least seems to care about his kids.” He said and you nodded as did Bucky.

“Yeah…just wants to keep ‘em safe. Can’t blame him for that…but…y’know…if he wasn’t so hardheaded this might not have happened.”

“Yeah, but Ursula would have still found a way to interfere.” Steve said and Bucky nodded vigorously.

“Oh yeah. No doubt. She’s still gonna do something horrible.” He said and you nodded and pressed play when they signaled for you to.

They watched as Ariel was given a tour of the kingdom, enjoying the sights, scenes, and activities, including dancing. Bucky nodded with approval, for a moment. Then he shook his head.

“No…no…don’t let her drive! She’s Steve! You don’t let Steve…drive.” He said and shook his head as Ariel took off.

“I don’t drive like that.” Steve protested and gestured at the screen, “Besides they’re fine. See?”

You just shook your head and they looked at the screen when Scuttle said that the scene called for vocal romantic stimulation.

“I do not think ‘seagull song’ as romantic stimulation.” Bucky said with a chuckle Steve shared while shaking his head.

“No. Yes, Sebastian you’re surrounded by amateurs.” He said and tilted his head, “How’d they all know to listen to him?”

Bucky sighed, “Because Sebastian is a famous court composer. I don’t know. Shh, maybe you can learn something about setting a mood for once.”

“What’s that mean?” Steve said and you looked at him.

“Shh.” You said and he sighed and they watched, then watched Eric try to guess Ariel’s name.

“She does not look like a Mildred.” Bucky said and Steve shook his head.

“Rachel isn’t too bad. Wait, he can actually understand Sebastian?” Steve asked and you nodded.

“Disney movie.” You reminded him and they watched as the animals sang and then as the flamingos shut Scuttle up before the kiss was interrupted by the eels knocked them both out of the water.

“I knew it!” Bucky said and pointed at the screen, “Don’t you call Ariel a tramp you over-purpled calamari broad! I hope Jaws eats you.”

“What is she doing?” Steve asked you and you just pointed at the screen.

“Just watch and Jaws isn’t in this movie.” You said and Bucky looked at you still gesturing at the screen as Eric played his flute and moped.

“There’s a shark! That counts!” he said and you nodded then they both glared when Ariel’s voice started playing out of the shell around the mysterious woman’s neck and cast the spell on Eric.

“Oh…hell no!” Bucky growled while staring wide-eyed full of wrath at the screen.

“Shit.” You thought to yourself, “Movie! Cartoon! Calm…down…”

“Did she just brainwash Eric?” Steve asked and you threw a piece of popcorn at his head, “Hey! No throwin’ food!”

“Shut up!” you said and gestured at Bucky glaring at the screen.

“She’s right, Buck. It’s a movie.” He said and Bucky nodded, taking a deep breath.

“Right. Movie. Cartoon. Disney.” The ex-assassin nodded, relaxing then scowled at Scuttle flying in and excitedly babbling to Ariel “He’s getting married…not to Ariel. He’s getting married to that evil b-yep. There she is.”

“Oh no…” Steve said, shaking his head.

“I know and if this were the original story you’d be both very upset, but this is Disney.” You said and they looked at you briefly before scowling at Ursula singing in the mirror, “In the original story he does get married to some princess he thought rescued him, but it’s not the sea witch, though she does try to get Ariel to stab them both with a dagger so she doesn’t turn into sea foam.”

“What?” they asked and you gestured at the screen as Scuttle asked if he’d ever been wrong.

“Yes.” They both said.

“When it’s important?!”

“Debatable.” Bucky said and they watched Sebastian make a plan and put Scuttle to work stalling the wedding after having Flounder tow Ariel, “Okay so the fish is stronger than he looks.”

“Apparently.” Steve said and ate some popcorn, “I wanna see what Scuttle does.”

“Mh.” Bucky nodded as he ate some of his own snack and they watched him squawk and gather the other wildlife, “This’ll be good.”

They then watched as Ursula’s human form kicked the dog Max, scowling. Bucky scowled intensely at the sight of Eric just standing there stock still, responding “I do.” Like a robot. At least until the animals attacked.

Then the most satisfied smirk appeared on his face. Steve chuckled as he looked at Bucky and watched the ensuing chaotic fight, including Max pausing before biting down hard on the “bride’s” butt.

“Good dog.” He said and both frowned when the shell amulet broke until realizing it was a good thing, breaking the mind control on Eric, but both of them frowned as they talked, “Shut up and kiss already!”

Ursula cackled as the sun set and you had to physically sit on Bucky to stop him from leaping at the screen when the witch grabbed Ariel and gloated. Steve launched out of the couch and grabbed Alpine in mid-leap the screen, having let out an affronted growl at it.

“No!” he told her, landing on the floor before holding her as he got up, “It’s just a movie.”

“Movie!” You reminded Bucky as he scowled and pointed his finger at the screen.

“S’not fair! S-she violated the contract! She interfered!” he protested and you nodded as he watched Triton bargain with Ursula to save his daughter.

“I know, Buck, but it’s gonna be okay.” Steve said while comforting the cat.

“That’s not how royal succession works!” Bucky scowled and Steve nodded.

“I know, but movie. Movie.” You said and pointed as Eric stopped Ursula from hurting Ariel, “See, they’re gonna fight back. It’s gonna be a battle, but it’s gonna be okay.”

He took a deep breath but nodded and smirked when Ursula zapped her own eels, “Good. Wait…what’s she doin’?”

“Well…she’s made herself a bigger target.” Steve said and Bucky nodded, watching Ursula brag about her power and bring up the sunken ship.

“Yeah, a very big target for a very big spear.” He said and nodded when Eric rammed the boat straight through Ursula, “Good.”

Steve nodded as well but didn’t question how Eric got to the shore so fast, he was busy petting Alpine, calming her from seeking revenge on the tv for upsetting Bucky, “Yeah. See, princess? The bad lady’s gone. All gone.”

“This better have a happy endin’ or I swear…” Bucky grumbled and you nodded while pointing at the screen as Ursula’s garden captives were transformed back to normal, including Triton.

They watched Triton show remorse, looking at Sebastian when he said kids needed to be free. They both shook their heads at that before smiling when Triton expressed how much he was going to miss his daughter before turning her into a human. Both were emotional as the music picked up and transitioned to the two getting married after kissing.

They then laughed when Louis the Chef returned to chase Sebastian only for the crab to win once again by cutting a rope. They then both watched Triton embrace his daughter before letting her go be with her new husband, sailing off into the rainbow together.

The credit music started playing after the last kiss, you hesitated for a moment, “So…maybe…maybe you’re not ready for Disney movies just yet. That…uh…that had a strong reaction…”

“Ursula is pure evil and shoulda been chopped, fried, and put in some Japanese sushi dish you feed to prisoners.” Bucky said with a scowl and Steve nodded.

“Music was good though.” He said and Bucky nodded, relaxing a bit as the music played again.

“Yeah. Scuttle was funny.” He added and Steve nodded.

“Animation was gorgeous.” He said and Bucky nodded.

“Oh yeah. Absolutely. All of the animation was great. Different from Snow White but still Disney and great.”

“What are the sequels like?” Steve asked and you shook your head.

“We’re not watching the sequels right now. You two need a break.”

1 Week Later

“Bucky…what the hell did you order?” you asked as you set the box down on the table that had just been delivered.

Steve set his coffee cup down to stare at the large box and nodded, “Yeah…Buck…what is that?”

“I ordered some cat toys for Alpine.” He answered and opened the box with one of his knives and you started shaking your head when you saw what it all was.

“Really, Bucky?” you asked and he smiled and tossed the Ursula shaped kicker toy on the floor that Alpine promptly launched herself at to punish followed by two jingling Flotsam and Jetsam toys she smacked repeatedly with her paw.

“Good girl.” Bucky said with a smile and sipped his coffee.

A/N: I couldn't help the comparison between Bucky and Eric and Steve and Ariel. I mean...I only have so much restraint. As for Bucky's reaction, well...he feels strongly about things. Time to decide the next one!

I hope you enjoyed it! Please feel free to let me know! I appreciate all likes, I do because it lets me know you like it, but if you really like it reblog it and if you really really like it comment and tell me, write some tags, send an unhinged gif. It's all accepted and I'm not picky, just let me know.

That is all.

Ao3 Link: Super Soldier Theater: The Little Mermaid

Series Masterlist🍿MASTER Masterlist

Taglist: @maryevm

Previous Movie:Jaws

Next Movie: Monty Python & The Holy Grail

🍿Winner: Money Python & The Holy Grail🍿

[moonstruckme]

i want this to be a series even if i'm the only one who will read it

would you do more royal!au sirius x reader??? please??? i mean the fluff and the banter alone are ripe for more situations but the smut of banging in a castle in formal wear or the angst of some great big political problem??? i'm here for it allllllll

only if you're interested in it

Absolutely I would! Thanks for requesting lovely ;)

cw: nausea, controlling family dynamics

prince!Sirius x princess!reader ♡ 2.1k words

You lie atop your bed, rubbing the sheets between your thumb and pointer finger. You estimate their thread count is about ten gazillion. The duvet piled by your feet is probably stuffed with feathers of a goose hatched from a golden egg and raised with a silver spoon right here in the palace. It all makes you feel slightly nauseous to think about. 

Though in fairness, the nausea could be from any number of things. The several courses of rich foods you had to force down over dinner with the Black family, the way Sirius’ eyes seemed to flicker every time they passed over you, the many, many hours of memorization you’d put in only to set your fork on the wrong edge of the plate when you wanted to signal you were finished eating, or perhaps the conversation you had with your grandmother and her council of advisors in her office afterwards. 

All in all, you’re really only waiting to either be violently sick or fall asleep. Whichever comes first. 

A knock on the door makes you sit up slowly. No one usually cares to see you past dinnertime. You wonder for a moment if you’ve misheard, if someone knocked further down the hall and the sound carried. 

Then it comes again. You get up. 

Sirius’ mouth is already half curved when you open the door, but his smile blooms as he takes you in from head to toe. 

“My,” he leans against your doorframe, looking positively delighted, “don’t you look cozy.” 

Your cheeks flame. You hadn’t been expecting any visitors when you’d put on your pajama bottoms and giant, graphic nightshirt. Sirius is also the most casual you’ve seen him in a gray sweatshirt and dark jeans, but he’s still wearing clothes, which means he’s still dressed better than you. You fear this is an inevitability you may never escape with him. 

“I’m having an early night,” you say.  

He frowns. “Oh. Really? What could I do to persuade you not to?” 

You feel your eyebrows rise. “What would you be persuading me to do instead?” 

“I’ve been thinking,” Sirius says, looking you in the eyes, “we should go out.” 

You feel acid in the back of your throat. You nearly choke on it. “We—you and me?” 

“I see how that wording could be confusing. I don’t mean like a date,” he clarifies. You let out a breath, and his grin renews. “Not that I would ever deny you one, gorgeous, if that’s what you wanted. But what I had in mind was more of an introduction to the kingdom.” 

Your stomach settles a bit. The inside of your lip finds its way between your teeth. “What do you mean?” 

“Well, it doesn’t seem like you’ve gotten out much since you’ve been here. Am I wrong?” 

You shake your head. 

Sirius’ smile is almost gentle. “I know it’s a bit unorthodox, because I’m not from here and your family rules this place, but I’ve actually been here quite a lot. I could show you around the town, get you acquainted with some worthwhile haunts.” He pauses, analyzing your reaction. “There’s a bakery not far from here that has the most incredible apple pastries this time of year, best I’ve had. They only use seasonal ingredients.” 

There’s an uneasy feeling about this, about him, an allure and a simultaneous urge to run. But you’re intrigued. “The best you’ve had?” 

His eyes flash with satisfaction. “Change quickly. They close at ten.” 

Sirius proves his prowess quickly. He brings you into town off the main road and says a few words to your guards that have them keeping a furtive distance from the both of you. To any passerby along the lamplit streets, you look like a regular couple. Intentionally or not, Sirius’ hand in yours completes the image. 

He pulls you into a coffee shop first, coerces you into trying a specialty latte and promises it won’t matter when you order it decaf. You make it to the bakery just before close, and Sirius orders not only the apple pastries but some with pear and a few with blackberry and one muffin for each of you to have tomorrow morning. He charms everyone behind the counter so effortlessly the owner gives you the muffins for free. 

You end up sitting on the grass at the edge of a park, on a hill sloping downward towards the street. Admittedly, you’ve not put much thought into the kingdom you’re allegedly supposed to run someday. It still feels like some kind of fraudulence to sleep in your bedroom in the palace, and the idea of being a princess to this place doesn’t feel any more real now that you’re seeing it up close. 

But this is a town you could love, you think. It’s the sort of place you might have traveled, before, and imagined your life in. Maybe a job at the bakery, grabbing coffee before your early mornings, indistinguishable from any of the other locals strolling around and chatting with shopkeepers and wearing their footprints into the ground. It’s hard not to imagine it even now, though you know your role in this place is far less quaint.

“Mmmmygod,” Sirius moans, licking sugary apple glaze from the corner of his mouth. “Your palate is not prepared for this. Don’t let it get cold.” 

You fish your apple pastry out of the bag obediently, taking a bite. It’s warm and soft, the dough flattening over your tongue. You close your eyes, and the flavor blooms. 

“Wow.” 

“Right?” He sounds downright gleeful, excited for you in a way that’s out of keeping with the refined, stately way you’re both usually expected to behave. 

“You were right. It’s really good.” You give him a smile and take another bite before putting the pastry away. 

Sirius cocks an eyebrow at you, his expression unabashedly judgemental. “You’re not going to finish it?” 

“Dinner didn’t sit very well with me,” you say apologetically. “You can have the rest, if you want.” 

“Oh.” His countenance melds into something like sympathy. “That’s alright, you can reheat it tomorrow if you like. Are you not feeling well?” 

You press your lips into a smile. “I’m okay.” 

“They’ve been running you pretty ragged, yeah? It must be a lot.” 

“I’m okay,” you say again, softer. 

You think the polite thing would be to at least act like he believes you, but Sirius doesn’t. You can feel his gaze on your face as you look out over the town. He’s been a bit different tonight, you think. Still ridiculous and jovial and loud, but gentler at times. Friendly in a more sincere way. Kind. 

You take a breath. “Can I ask you something?” 

You can practically feel the lift of his eyebrows. “Maybe,” he answers, half humorous. 

“Did you know our families have been trying to arrange our marriage?” 

There’s a thick pause. You watch a couple of the lights in windows go out. 

Sirius’ sigh is heavy. “Honestly? I suspected.”

You turn towards him, your throat tightening with nausea and fright and half a dozen other emotions you haven’t identified yet. Sirius is still looking at you, his mouth twisted in a grimace. 

“My family doesn’t tend to see fit to involve me in these things, even when they pertain to me,” he says somewhat bitterly, “but I know how my parents operate. It’s not rare for us to have visits here, but these last couple since you arrived have involved much more nice-making than usual.” He leans back on his forearms, tilting his face to the sky. For the first time since you’ve met him you think that he looks almost tired. “I suppose us appearing to get along at the ball probably didn’t help matters. They’re always looking for someone who can ‘tame’ me. Now they likely think you’re it.” 

You fight to keep your tone even. “Can they just do that? Make us get married?” 

“Well, clearly it’s not that easy, or we would be.” Sirius seems to be musing aloud. His eyes trace the stars, voice low and thoughtful. “I imagine the holdup is on your side of things. My family would love to be rid of me, but your lot may not want to take me on.” 

“I’m sure that’s not true,” you say, but your voice is growing wispy, your vision blurring. 

Sirius sits up. “Hey.” He sounds upset, but his hand on your shoulder is gentle. “Don’t do that. It’s not as bad as it seems, it’ll be okay.” 

“Sorry.” You jam your fingertips into your eyes, trying to keep tears from leaking out. “I’m sorry, I’ve just never felt so…out of control before.” 

Lately, that’s all you’ve felt. Helpless, robbed of your autonomy. You eat and wear and say what you’re told to, you need guards to go out and get pastries, and now the rest of your life is being practically given away to some other kingdom so that your family can rest easy knowing trade agreements are well solidified. 

“I know,” Sirius murmurs. His palm runs a couple inches down your arm, then back up again. It’s the most tentative you’ve seen him. “You’re not, though, really. They can scheme all they want, but nothing has to happen unless both of us get in front of an altar and say ‘I do.’ No one can actually make us go through with it.” 

You lower your hands enough to look at him, and he gives you a sideways smile. 

“I’d be more than happy to be the one to ruin us, if you like. I have a reputation for foiling my parents’ plans anyway. You can even act betrayed. The gracious new princess, and the wayward prince who wouldn’t be bound to her.” 

You worry the inside of your lip. “I wouldn’t want to throw you under the bus.” 

“Sweet of you, doll, but I’m already under there. No sense in taking you with me.” 

He takes another pastry out of the bag, resolved and resigned. You study him. Your life has been nothing but change lately. One terrifying revelation leading to the next, seemingly following a structure you’re not privy to. You haven’t had time to get your feet under you in your new life, constantly being told you’re doing things wrong or getting introduced to new important people or having your manners corrected. This is only your first time getting out into the town where you live! You don’t feel ready to be married. 

But through all the madness of your new life, Sirius has been an odd sort of constant. Kind, and grounding, and casual even when it’s improper. He’s been a real friend to you, the only person who stops to ask how you’re doing and seemingly wants an honest answer. You’ve come to take comfort in him. 

“Do you really think my family is keeping us from…” You find you can’t say it, but Sirius catches your drift anyway. 

“It’s the only explanation I can come up with,” he replies. “Or, not keeping us from it, necessarily, but slowing the process. They’re likely negotiating something to do with the trade agreement, making sure I’m a worthwhile deal for them to take on.” 

“How long does negotiating that stuff take?” 

“I don’t know. Believe it or not, this is actually my first time as well. At least a couple weeks, I’d guess. Your family may want to see how you’re settling in first.” 

You gnaw on your lip, pensive. When you look at Sirius, he’s looking back at you, gray eyes discerning. 

“What’s going on in that head of yours?” he asks you. 

“What if we didn’t stop it yet?” 

Surprise flickers over his expression, gone as quickly as it came. “I assumed you’d want to be done with this as soon as possible. Why are you asking?” 

You shrug, feeling your cheeks heat. “You’d probably have to be here pretty often while they’re still talking things out, right?” 

“Yeah…” 

“And we’re sort of friends now, aren’t we?” 

Sirius’ mouth pulls up on one side. “I’d love to be your friend, gorgeous.” 

“So…” You pull up a blade of grass, carving it in half with your fingernail. “As long as we don’t say ‘I do,’ we don’t have to be married, but we don’t necessarily have to send you home before they’ve even decided anything, right?”

He leans forward interestedly. “Are you suggesting we let our families go through weeks of pointless negotiations, maybe even humor their beliefs that we like each other, just to break things off when it all comes to a head?”

“Well, we do like each other, don’t we?” You smile, and he beams back. “I don’t know, would that be okay with you?”

“Oh.” Sirius shakes his head at you, still grinning. “Sweetheart, you are even more fun than I imagined you’d be.”

[crowsofdarkness]

CamBoy! Bill Skarsgard: First Virtual Meeting-Part One

-pic not mine.-

Pairings: CamBoy!Bill Skarsgard x Viewer!Reader

Summary: Bill isn't ashamed of the work he does, showcasing his body online for anyone willing to pay. His number one rule was never to make a connection with anyone who either sent him messages or paid for private one-on-one video sessions. That was until you decided to request a certain private session.

Content Warnings: 18+ smut which includes Bill having an only fans page, masturbation, phone sex, virtual sex, and language.

Authors Note: this is a limited mini-series, just a bunch of blurbs that take place in this universe. i'm not sure exactly how long this will be. tags will be open for this if anyone is interested!

CamBoy!Bill masterlist.

What the hell am I doing? 

I found myself asking that same question more than once ever since I signed up for only fans a few weeks ago. Not as a producer but as someone that watches and enjoys. At first I was extremely nervous, chasting myself for even thinking of subscribing to strange men who do sex work, virtually. But after being single for my entire life, I’d become desperate. I craved some kind of attention whether it be sexual or just a simple conversation. Although, after being subscribed to a few different pages on Only Fans for a few weeks, I had yet to actually talk to anyone. 

I mean, who the fuck subscribes to Only Fans to talk to people?

Again, asking myself what the hell am I doing?

Letting out a deep breath, I eased farther back into my bed with my laptop on my lap as I clicked through the different pages I subbed to, ready to unwind after a long day. I had a date earlier that ended in disaster, further proving that maybe a relationship was not meant for me. It was weird, me finding more comfort doing this rather than dating. 

Even though there were a few accounts I liked, there was one that I had always found myself going back to when I thought I wanted something different. 

Bill with the 70’s porn stache. 

I watched nearly all of his videos with my rose vibrator pressed against my clit or using my dildo while Bill had his hand wrapped around his cock. He never had any special effects or wore masks like a lot of the other creators on here which is why I found myself drawn to him. He also had a tik tok page where he would post videos showing off his defined abs or trying whatever viral sound was trending. I liked every single new video he posted but never commented due to being shy. He had over a million followers, there was no way he’d ever pay attention to one of my comments. 

Earlier today, he posted a Tik Tok saying he’s offering a new type of content on his OF page, one on one virtual meetings. For a certain amount of money, Bill would skype call someone for ten minutes and they could have virtual sex. Only one time. He made it clear that he would never have more than one virtual call with someone. Almost immediately I checked to see if my funds were available for this but then when I actually thought about it, it was weird, right? Having virtual sex with a stranger? 

Then again, how would it be any different than me getting off to old videos he posted? 

He would actually be talking to you. Which is what you want, no? 

Gnawing on my bottom lip, I quickly signed up for this special one on one virtual meeting and after paying the amount that would put a small dent in my bank account, I waited. Bill mentioned earlier that due to how many people would most likely sign up, he would have to set times and dates for everyone. So instead of sitting for a reply, I opted on placing my laptop on the other end of my bed and dragged my feet to the bathroom across the hall in my apartment. When I first sat down with my laptop, my body had been vibrating with the need for a release but now as the nerves began to eat away at me for what I’d just signed up for, I needed to think of something else. 

By the time I returned into my room, towel wrapped around my soaked body, I saw a flashing notification on my laptop making my heart nearly burst out of my chest. I didn’t bother to get dressed, simply sat on the edge of my bed still in my towel and brought my laptop to my lap. 

New message from Porn Stache Bill. 

While his username wasn’t that great, he made up for it with the content he provided. 

Letting out a deep breath, I clicked open the message and nearly choked on my saliva when I saw it was a video message from Bill. 

“Fuck, this is too real,” I muttered under my breath, finger hesitating over the play button before I hit it.

Bill appeared on the screen of my laptop, dressed in only a pair of grey sweats. The muscles of his abs seemed to rippled underneath the light of his bedroom as he leaned back against the dark sheets of his bed. His hair was messy, chest rising and falling with each deep breath he took which only made me wonder what he’d been doing before he recorded this video. My eyes, however, quickly honed in on the mustache. I was a sucker for it with every single one of his videos.

“Hi, Y/N.” His face broke out in a smile followed by a wink and I nearly fell back onto my own bed when I heard my name fall from those full lips. “I wanted to say thank you for signing up for my private one on one video chats. I’ll be calling you tomorrow night at nine p.m. You have me for ten minutes for whatever you want. If there are any limits, please let me know beforehand. I look forward for our time together.”

When the video ended, I couldn’t ignore the way my heart sank at how monotone Bill sounded. But then again, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was recording the same video over and over again, only changing the names for everyone who signed up. 

Closing my laptop, I set it on my desk before stepping into my closet to find something to wear tomorrow night on this video chat. 

“What the actual fuck am I doing?” I yelled at myself while I paced my bedroom. 

It was five minutes to nine and to say I was a nervous wreck was a fucking understatement. I could barely concentrate at work today and when I went out with some friends after work, all I could think about was this video chat that was about to happen. I didn’t dare tell any of my coworkers I signed up to have a sexual video chat with a complete stranger because I knew they would try and talk me out of it. Sex aside, I was doing this for me as terrible as that sounded. I’d been in my own shell for the last 28 years of my life, never branching out or trying anything hence why I’d been single. No one wanted someone who was inexperienced. 

How pathetic. You signed up on a sex website to help a stranger with sexual activities and for them to talk to you. No wonder why you’re single. 

Once again ignoring the criticizing voice in my brain, I stopped pacing in front of the large mirror in my bedroom to give myself one final once over. My hair was pulled back in a tight french braid, I wore very minimal makeup, and the outfit I wore was anything but sexy mostly because I didn’t own any lingerie. I chose to wear a loose white shirt that hung off one of my shoulders and a pair of olive green panties which you couldn’t see due to the length of the shirt. 

My bedroom wasn’t anything fancy or special, and with the way I had my laptop set up, Bill would only be able to see me and the wall behind my bed which had those vine lights hanging against it. 

Just as those thoughts began to creep in again, a noise from my laptop had me turning on my heels; the clock on my nightstand blinking 9:00 pm. Bill was calling me. 

“No turning back now,” I sighed, sitting on my bed. 

I didn’t bother trying to find a sexy position to sit in because I wasn’t that; sexy. I’d always been average and it took me awhile to accept it. With shaky fingers, I accepted the video chat and soon was graced with that mustache and smile. 

“Hi. Y/N, right?” 

I blinked, forcing myself not to gawk too long at his bare chest. Bill wore a pair of red boxers as he sat relaxed on his office chair. Unlike the video he sent me yesterday, his hair was neatly combed to the side. 

“H-hi,” I said. 

Bill smiled. “Nervous, huh?” 

My cheeks burned and I ran my sweaty palms on the comforter of my bed. “A little. I’ve never actually done this before.” 

“Is there anything I could do to ease your nerves?” He asked while easing back into the chair. 

“Uh, maybe if you could take the lead.” 

The corner of Bill’s mouth curved slightly. “I read over the list you sent over. Seems like you don’t really know what you’re into.”

I cast my face down, not wanting him to see the embarrassment that covered me. This was a very bad idea. I shouldn’t have signed up for this. 

“Hey,” Bill’s soft voice from my laptop made me lift my gaze slightly. “It’s alright. There’s no need to be embarrassed. We all have to start somewhere when it comes to sex.”

I bit my bottom lip. “If I’m being honest, I’m not sure why I even signed up for this. I thought maybe it could help break me out of this shell. But now I think maybe it’s only making things worse. Which I know sucks because I already paid for this and there’s no refund so I guess I’ll eat the money. I’m sorry that I wasted your time. I don’t know why I did this.” 

“Seems like you ramble when you’re nervous,” Bill chuckled. 

I cringed at myself. This was something I already knew and the fact this attractive man, who I spent hours watching his tik toks and O.F content, immediately called me out on it made me shrink farther into my bed. The hem of my shirt rode up my thighs when I did, showcasing my panties. Bill’s eyes darkened as he sat straight up in his computer chair to get a closer look at the camera. 

“If you want, we can just talk,” he offered me a smile. 

I thought about it for a moment. While I did start this whole thing to try and find someone to talk to, I also did want this to break me out of this shy shell. 

“No, I want to do more but I don’t know where to start,” I admitted. 

Bill glanced at something off screen for a few beats before looking back at the camera. “We have seven minutes. Would you rather us both do something, just you, or just me?” 

I sighed. “Maybe if you just did something? Since I’m so fucking nervous, I think it would be better if I watched you.”

“You’re kind of cute when you curse,” he winked. “Alright, as long as you're comfortable with it. How about you strip for me?” 

“I don’t know why you would want to see me,” I said. 

“Your shirt is thin, Y/N. The last four minutes of us talking, I’ve been looking at those pretty tits underneath. I bet they’re round and so perky,” Bill’s voice had deepened, his hand starting to leave the armrest of his chair. 

“Oh,” I muttered, glancing down at my chest which was in fact visible through my shirt. 

“Just the shirt for me, Y/N. You can keep those green panties on. That alright?” 

Slowly nodded, I dragged up my shirt over my head, letting it fall to the bed next to me. Bill groaned, pushing his chair back so I could see all of him as he took out his cock from his boxers. 

“I knew it. I knew your tits were perky round.” 

I watched, frozen, as he wrapped his hand around his cock in a grip that had to have hurt but only seemed to bring him more pleasure. This wasn’t anything new for me, I’d watch plenty of videos of him teasing his followers on Tik Tok or posting more intimate videos on his O.F. 

Only this time, this was more private. It was only between us. 

“Lay down on your bed for me and spread your legs. Can you do that?” 

Bill’s hoarse voice made my skin shiver with heat and doing what he did, I slowly laid on my bed with my legs spread wide. The show of him jerking himself off made a small wet spot appear on my panties, something he immediately noticed. 

“The sight of me choking my cock with my hand is making you wet, huh?” 

I nodded, slightly blissed out from the sight on my screen. Bill’s jaw was slack as his hand moved in a fast rhythm. I studied the way his thumb would drag over the beads of precum on the head before using it as lube to make his cock slick with it. Or how he would grip the base of his cock, holding it for a few seconds before choking on a breath. 

My pussy ached with the need to touch myself but I couldn’t move. Too engrossed in the private show he was giving me. No one else. Me. 

“Can you touch your nipples? For me, please.” 

Something flared deep inside of my gut at how he begged me so with another nod, I began playing with my nipples in the way I knew I liked. I arched off the bed slightly when I pinched a little too hard. 

“You like it rough, Y/N? The harder, the better?”

“Yes,” I moaned, watching him through hooded eyes.

Bill licked his lips, tongue grazing over the mustache, and I let out a moan when I watched his hips stilled right as he spilled into his hand. 

“Oh fuck, Y/N. You see that? You see what you do to me?” He groaned, working himself through the aftershocks. 

“Oh my fucking god,” I moaned, letting my head fall back to my pillow and my fingers grazed over my panties. 

I was going to wait to touch myself after the call ended, too embarrassed to do that in front of Bill. But seeing him come apart while he watched me pinch and pull at my nipples nearly tipped me over the edge and I knew I wouldn’t last long. 

Just as I went to slip my fingers inside of my panties, my phone began buzzing when the ten minute timer went off. Feeling the world drop from around me, I sat up in bed to silence the timer and stared at the laptop screen where Bill was slumped in his chair trying to catch his breath. 

“I’ve been doing this for a while but that,” he motioned to his messy cock, “Was so fucking messy.

A red hue covered my entire face and my ears as I avoided my gaze from the screen for a moment. “I bet you say that to everyone” 

Bill reached for the tissues on his desk before he began cleaning himself off. “Well, it seems like our ten minutes are up. I hope it was everything you wanted.” 

Silence filled the air between us for a few beats as I tried to think of what to say. Do I thank him? Do I say see you later? Can’t wait to see the next video you post?

“Uh, yeah. Sure. Thank you for this, for everything you do. It’s always a nice thing to see. You’re a nice thing to see. Not your thing! I mean it’s nice, don’t get me wrong. But-.”

Smooth, Y/N. Real fucking smooth.

Bill let out a deep and hearty laugh, running a clean hand through his hair, and tucked himself back inside of his boxers. 

“You’re fucking adorable when you ramble. Have a good night, Y/N.”

When the screen went black, I let out a long breath and closed the laptop. This was the one and only time we would have a private moment like this, just the two of us. He’d continue to post videos, which I planned on watchling like I had before, but now I couldn’t push away the lingering feeling that it would be different now.  

I originally signed up for this thinking it would break me out of my shell, help me find out more about myself, sex wise, and what I was into for future partners. Hell, the few words I spoke to Bill was enough to fill the empty void in my life, even if it was for a few minutes. But now that it was over, I realized how much of a mistake it was. It wasn't the shame that usually followed after I watched porn but more so the disappointment in myself because the only way I could have a man's attention on me was if I paid for it. 

Clearing my throat, feeling the burn slowly rise, I snatched up my shirt and walked towards my bathroom; Bill’s words clinging to my sweaty skin. 

Oh fuck, Y/N. You see that? You see what you do to me?

[criminallyvenomous]

Anytime, Always - Spencer Reid X Reader (part five)

part four story masterlist

•Plot - When Dr. Reid came to speak at your University, you were thrilled. A big-time F.B.I. agent at your own school, how could you resist? Soon, that wasn’t the only thing you couldn’t resist. Random meet ups and nights together were fun at first, but when he started guest lecturing on a regular? That was a whole new experience.

•Ship - Spencer Reid X Reader

•Fandom - Criminal Minds

•Warnings - Age gap (legal consenting adults), Alcohol, Fluff, Eventual smut, Pining, and of course a warning you might fall for Spence even harder post reading)

•Word Count - 807

~

You hopped onto the bed and pulled out your food, handing Spencer his as he sat next to you.

“Wait, what are your socks?” You asked, sitting up.

“Penguins. I like to add a little light to my days.” He placed his food onto the nightstand and turned to put his foot near you.

“Cute, but get those dogs out of my face.” You laughed.

“Dogs?” He asked, putting his leg back down and sitting up to grab his dinner.

“Yeah, feet? Dogs? Don’t tell me you’ve never heard that.”

“Gotta say I haven’t.” He admitted and you laughed.

Man, he had to take a few more weekends off, this was great. He tried to remove some of the pressure, like Derek suggested, and it felt nice not trying so hard with you. He felt like he could be himself. He liked that you were yourself with him too. You were a little shy at times, but still more confident than he was on any day of the week. Other than at his job, which he had completely forgotten about with all of the spare room in his brain going towards being with you.

“Do you think we could try watching that Parks and Recreation show again?” He asked as you looked through the apps on the hotel’s smart T.V., ruling against cable.

“Spencer Reid, are you actually asking to watch a T.V. show?” You teased,

searching for it on the screen.

“What can I say? You’re rubbing off on me.”

The two of you were watching an episode about the miniature horse, Li’l Sebastian while you ate your dinner and drank some wine. It was a great date, Spencer went over some brief history on the usage of tofu and you in turn put a bite of it into his mouth to stop the tofu talk.

“Jokes on you, It’s delicious.”

The food was good, so was the wine, but the atmosphere and ambiance were fantastic. Spencer was fantastic. It was cute to watch the strong and intelligent man snort at a dumb joke in a show. It was hot when he drank wine, just the way his adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. It was sweet when he looked right at you and told you something you wanted to hear.

“Theophrastus said ‘time is the most valuable thing a man can spend.’ I’m glad I spent it with you.” He spilled quotes out of his brain as if it were water falling out of a faucet. His easiness in complimenting you brought a smile to your face you felt like you’d have for years.

“Me too. You’re amazing, Spencer.” You blushed as he smiled at you.

“I truly try.” He laughed. “Come ‘ere.” He said, placing a hand on your waist and pulling you onto his lap.

You leaned in to kiss him and he met your lips with the same excitement. It was more aggressive than expected, the time apart having pulled you two closer in desperation of one another.

“I could get used to this.” You let out as you separated to catch your breath.

“Me too.” He smiled, leaning back in. He went for your neck this time, stumbling trying to move your shirt with his right hand as he moved his lips lower.

The two of you were in a daze of desire. Hands roaming with need and clothes falling and thrown anywhere and everywhere.

“Perfect.” He shaped his hands into a little camera, pretending to take a picture.

“You’re cute.” You chuckled, just the simple sound of your laugh making his stomach flutter. He could really get used to this.

You reached towards your wine glass that you were beginning to forget about and taking a rather large in comparison sip. He decided to join you.

“Liquid courage, or so I’m told.” He took a swig and extended the drink towards yours.

“To liquid courage.” You clinked your glasses, cheers-ing.

You set the glass down as the sound of the next episode’s cold open filled the gap of silence between the two of you. It wasn’t an awkward silence, which was the plague to Spencer’s existence. He enjoyed a good gap of conversation, allowing his thoughts to have a moment to shine, but when it became tense or awkward between two or more people, he hated it. There were already so many moments shared between the two of you that he would hold onto. He just wanted to hold onto you, to be as close as possible.

With confirmations of consent and the heat inside of you growing every second he wasn’t inside you, Spencer smirked. He had kissed his way down your thighs and was teasing you with every waking minute.

“Spencer.” You stated with a fake anger tone of voice.

“Hmm?” He muffled against your skin.

“Please.”

part six

[sister-lucifer]

READ PART TWO HERE

Genre: Fluff, not explicitly romantic

Summary: It’s been raining all day, and you and Tim are stuck inside the cabin together. You can’t sleep because of the thunder, and decide to see if Tim can help you out. 

Content/Warnings: Gender neutral reader, brief mentions of alcohol, uh…if you can think of anything else let me know! This is pretty damn soft, but actually not explicitly romantic.

Like my writing? I take requests! NSFW or SFW for any fandoms in my bio (request rules + masterlist in pinned post)!

Also, please reblog! it’s free, takes two seconds, and really helps me out 

Feedback is encouraged and appreciated.

Not fully proofread! Let me know if you see any errors!

You don’t really notice the sound of the rain against the windows anymore. It’s been raining nonstop since, what, 7 AM this morning? Its not quite storming, at least not yet, but everything is soaked, and you can hardly even walk out onto the patio without your shoes filling with water. It’s dreary, sure, but not exactly unpleasant. It’s a good day to stay in, that’s all. 

You shift your sitting position a bit, wrapping one of the woven blankets from the back of the couch around your shoulders as you gaze out the window. You’re not really expecting to see anything, it’s just trees and trees for miles around, but you always seem to find yourself gazing out into the endless pines. You only turn away when you hear Tim sit down in the recliner, sighing lazily as he puts his feet up. This is a sight you’ve seen many times: A few strands of hair falling between his eyes, an old flannel half unbuttoned over a stained white tank, a beer can in one hand and a nearly finished cigarette in the other. It’s practically Tim’s natural state.

He takes one last drag from his cigarette before snuffing it out in the ash tray he keeps on the end table, chasing the smoke with a sip of his beer before that, too, is set aside. He glances out the window, whistling softly. 

“Ain’t nobody goin’ out in that weather,” He drawls, “Nobody with half a mind, anyhow.”

You nod in agreement, taking a little sip of your hot cocoa. It’s a wonderful way to keep warm in this homely old cabin.

You glance over at Tim, who is now absentmindedly flipping through TV channels. He’s probably looking for sports or Storage Wars or something, you think. Some old man show you’ll never find interest in.

As you look at him a bit longer, just spacing out a bit with your eyes on his face, your mind meanders back to before you two were this comfortable with each other. It feels weird to think about that now, though. You couldn’t imagine being in that place again.

Tim’s told you before that you reminded him of himself when he was a younger, when he was ‘new and green’ as he’d say. You were a wide eyed, scared kid, just like he was. You deserved to be living in a dorm somewhere, getting shitfaced at college parties and making choices you’ll regret the next morning but laugh at for years, not to be forced to cope with this reality. No one deserves it, really, to wake up in an unfamiliar place surrounded only by endless woods, no one and nothing around to help you and your body aching all over with injuries you don’t recall getting. 

He knows that feeling. 

He’s never felt worse. Neither have you. It’s hard to get worse than that, really. 

You were still a bit dazed when he first helped you back to his cabin, but something about the worn walls and cozy, lived-in feeling of the old rugs and antique furniture told you you were safe, at least for now. You were out the second your head hit the pillow. You slept for nearly two days straight. You really needed it. 

Since then you’ve been a permanent fixture in Tim’s life. You don’t really leave the cabin, and you’ve never left alone. Tim says it’s just until you can find a job and a place of your own, but he doesn’t seem to be in any rush to kick you out. You’re thankful for that, of course, but you can’t help but smile every time he insists that this is only a temporary situation, that if you don’t get off your ass he’ll quite literally throw you to the wolves, but he always smiles too. You’re definitely on the same page, and the headline says you’re not going anywhere.

The rainy day melts into a rainy afternoon, then an evening, then a quiet night. The rain has slowed down a bit, but now the thunder has rolled in, and every ten or fifteen seconds or so you can hear it clapping loudly overhead. The sound is a bit more…penetrating than usual, a bit more raucous, and far more bothersome. You’re not sure why. The only thing you are sure of is that your once comforting outdoor ambience is really ticking you off. 

You sit up with a yawn, glancing at the clock and groaning with annoyance when you see it’s already passed 2:00 AM. Damn, you’ve been lying here a while, and still no luck getting to sleep. 

The thunder crashes outside once more, making you roll your eyes. It’s mocking you, you think, poking and prodding in an attempt to get a reaction. You simply sit there for a few moments, debating turning your TV on or reading a book to tire yourself a bit more, but neither of those are particularly attractive options at the moment. You bring your knees up and rest your head on them, half lidded eyes lazily wandering around your dark room. It looks the same as usual, no surprise there, but when you look down the hallway you notice that Tim’s door is cracked open. 

Hm. Odd. He never leaves it open. Must’ve stumbled off to bed and failed to realize he didn’t close it all the way. 

It’s not a big deal at all, really, but the light of his TV leaking out through the cracked door paired with the noise of the thunder gives you an idea. 

You slowly slip out of bed, cringing a bit when your feet hit the cold wood. You’re as quiet as you can be, avoiding all the floorboards you know will squeak. There’s really no point, Tim sleeps like a rock most nights, especially if he’s been drinking, but you figure you’re better off safe than sorry.

You make your way to his door, pushing it open just a bit to peek inside. You wince when the door creaks unbearably loudly, but Tim doesn’t move a muscle. He’s sprawled out like a starfish on his bed, limbs in all directions and his single blanket only half covering his body. He looks foolish, but in a charming sort of way. He’s even snoring a bit.

You cautiously make your way to his bedside, watching him for any sign of consciousness. You don’t want to startle him. Even if he didn’t mean to, he could really hurt you if he thought you were a threat, though at the moment he’s not very intimidating. His sweatpants are ratty, there’s no hiding his dad bod in that old sports tee, and his face is illuminated by the cheesy sitcom he left on; not exactly the pinnacle of danger. 

You step up to his bed, debating what to do. You should wake him gently, it reduces the risk of injury, but how do you gently wake someone who could sleep through an aerial assault?

“…Pssst, Tim?” You whisper, but get no response. You repeat yourself, a bit louder this time.

“Tim, wake up.” 

He stirs a bit, but all you get is a groan and a minute twitch of his eye. Dammit. 

You sigh and roll your eyes with annoyance, reaching out to softly shake his shoulder.

“Tim, it’s me. Wake up.”

He lazily swats your hand away, groaning again and mumbling a reply without even opening his eyes. 

“Whaddya want, kid…?” He asks, practically chewing his words.

“I can’t sleep,” You respond simply, giving a little shrug. Tim is not amused at this answer. 

“And why does this have to involve me?” He huffs, glancing at you for a moment before his eyes close again. He turns onto his side towards you, yawning as he tries to pull his blanket back up. 

You don’t really have an answer to that one. Why did you feel the need to come in here and wake Tim up? It’s not like he controls the thunder. It’s not like he controls your inability to sleep…

…But maybe he can help. 

“I can’t sleep,” You explain, trying to figure out how to word your request without sounding stupid, “The thunder is too loud. I thought maybe I could…you know…” 

Tim’s eyes finally open, for real. He raises a brow at you, and for a moment you fear you’ve overstepped, but his expression shifts to tired once more as he turns onto his back again. 

“Kid,” He mutters, clearly annoyed but trying to be gentle, “If you’re old enough to share a beer with me, you are definitely too damn old to be running into my bed ‘cause you’re scared of a li’l thunder.”

“I’m not scared,” You quickly protest, “It’s just too loud for me to sleep. I didn’t know what else to do, I just thought…”

You trail off. You’re not really sure what you thought.

“…Never mind.” 

You turn to walk away, hoping he’ll be too tired to remember this in the morning. You’re in the doorway when his gruff voice stops you. 

“Wait, wait,” He drawls, sleepily waving you over without moving from where he’s lying, “Get back here, I ain’t chasin’ ya off…” 

You pause at that, then slowly walk back to his bed. He’s silent, and for a few moments unmoving, but then he scoots over a bit, patting the bed next to him. 

“C’mon.” 

You sigh in relief, happy to see Tim responding at least somewhat positively. You climb into bed next to him, though you’re careful not to get too close to him. You and Tim don’t really do physical contact beyond a high five for a job well done. 

That’s what makes it all the more surprising when he wraps an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side but making sure to be gentle, giving you ample opportunity to pull away if you need to. You don’t.

He doesn’t turn to look at you, keeping his eyes closed and his face towards the ceiling, his free hand idly resting over his stomach. 

“…You ain’t too scared, are ya?” He drawls. You’re confused for a moment, but then the thunder sounds again and you realize what he means. You hadn’t even noticed the thunder since you walked in. It was nice. 

“No, I’m fine, really,” You insist, “I’m not scared, it’s just hard to sleep with the noise. It’s more annoying than anything else.”

He gives a grunt of acknowledgment. 

“You get on to sleep, then. Ain’t no reason for you to be tired tomorrow.” 

You nod, moving a bit closer to him. He, in turn, wraps him arm a bit tighter around you. It feels…nice. Foreign, yes, but far from unpleasant. He smells like pine trees and faded Old Spice cologne. 

You yawn softly, pulling the blanket up over the two of you as you get comfortable. A comfortable silence settles over you both as the sound of the thunder mixed with the blurry noise of the TV. You’re the first to break it, a question falling from your lips before you can really think of stopping it. 

“…You were worried I was afraid?” 

Tim shrugs, scratching at his stubble as he answers. 

“I mean, I guess…I just wanted to make sure, ya know? Make sure you didn’t need me to do nothing to make you feel better…” 

That makes you smile.

“Didn’t think you’d care that much…” You murmur with a hint of a giggle. 

“Don’t be stupid,” Tim quickly snaps, “Course I care. I care about you. Ain’t no way for me not to. I’ve cared about you since the second I took you in. You’re not that young, I know, but back then you were just a kid to me. You’ve matured since then, yeah, but I’ll never forget the way you looked when I found you wandering the trail that day…” 

“Yeah, yeah, and you remember when I was three apples tall, I get it,” You tease with a playful laugh. Tim can’t help but chuckle, giving you a little squeeze. 

“Can it, ya little shit. You know what I’m sayin’. I knew what I was doin’ when I let you into my home, I wouldn’t have done that if I didn’t care.”

He’s got a point there. Most of the time Tim’s number one priority is self preservation. He rarely goes out of his way to do anything that doesn’t directly benefit him. He must’ve seen something in you absolutely worth the trouble. What exactly it is you’ll never know, but you’re certainly happy with where it’s gotten you. 

You turn to him a bit, giving him a tired smile. He turns to you as though he can sense your stare, cracking open one eye to return your smile before laying his head back again. 

“Alright, alright, ‘nuff yammerin’. Go to sleep,” He orders, reaching over to ruffle your hair before his hand rests back on his stomach. He never was good at being strict.

You stretch a bit before settling into your spot, getting as comfortable as you can so that you won’t have to shift around and risk bothering or waking up Tim later on. He hasn’t moved a muscle, his breathing already slowed and all of his muscles relaxed for once. It’s an odd sight, really. Usually he’s always holding some tension in his brow or jaw or shoulders, but he’s completely relaxed now, as are you. You finally feel like you could fall asleep.

“Night,” You mutter, your eyes fluttering shut. The last thing you hear before you fall asleep is Tim’s southern drawl ringing in your ears. 

“Sweet dreams, kid.”

reblog banners by cafekitsune

[witchhkitty222]

Supernova (series)

Steve Rogers x reader

Chapter 1 - A Line in the Sand

summary: Y/N Y/L/N, a bold and reckless speedster, joins the Avengers, immediately clashing with Steve Rogers. She delights in teasing him, while he struggles to keep her in line. Their rivalry intensifies until a mission gone wrong forces Steve to save her, revealing an unexpected vulnerability between them. Despite this, Y/N continues to challenge him, and their tension only grows—much to the amusement of their teammates, who are convinced something more is bound to happen.

warnings: none

word count: 1.2k

The Avenger’s Tower was always buzzing with energy, but today, something—or rather, someone—was shaking things up more than usual.

“Everyone, meet y/n y/l/n,” Tony announced, leaning against the bar with his usual smirk. 

“Speedster, telepath, and officially the newest pain in Steve’s ass.”

Steve Rogers crossed his arms, jaw tightening. He had already read her file three times. Former SHIELD asset, saved by some mysterious plant after a mission gone wrong, now boasting powers that made her both an asset and a potential threat. He wasn’t convinced she belonged here.

Y/n, on the other hand, had no such doubts. She beamed at the room, flipping her dark hair over her shoulder as she placed a hand on her hip. 

“Nice to meet you all. I promise I bite only when asked nicely.”

Natasha snorted. Thor let out a booming laugh. Even Loki, lurking near the corner, smirked with mild amusement. Steve, however, was unimpressed.

“We take our job seriously here,” he said, his voice firm.

Y/n blinked at him. Then, her lips curved into a slow, mischievous grin. “Oh, I love a challenge.”

The next few weeks were nothing short of torture for Steve.

Y/n was everywhere. Training sessions turned into an exercise in frustration. She zipped around the gym at lightning speed, dodging every punch, and when Steve finally managed to land a hit, she giggled.

“Wow, Cap, didn’t think you had it in you,” she teased, winking as she stepped away, completely unbothered.

Meetings weren’t any better. She’d kick her feet up on the table, twirl a pen between her fingers, and interrupt serious discussions with flirtatious quips that had Sam and Bucky choking on their coffee. But the worst? She had a thing for invading his personal space.

“Relax, Captain. You’re always so tense,” she purred one evening, standing far too close in the common room.

Steve clenched his jaw. “Some of us actually follow protocol.”

Y/n gasped dramatically. “Rules? Oh no! Not rules! What will I ever do?” She placed a hand on his chest, batting her lashes up at him. “Tell me, Steve, do you ever break them? Or do you sleep in your uniform too?”

The others were enjoying the show. Too much.

“You’re unbelievable,” Steve muttered, stepping away.

“And you’re adorable when you’re flustered.”

Steve hated how his ears burned at that. But then, everything changed. One night, during a mission gone sideways, Y/n found herself facing down an enemy alone. She had been reckless—too confident in her abilities. And for the first time, Steve saw something other than mischief in her eyes. Fear. Without thinking, he was there, shielding her from an incoming blast, throwing his shield with deadly precision. When the dust settled, he turned to her, breathing hard.

“You okay?”

She nodded, something unreadable flickering across her face. Then, to his utter shock, she whispered, “Why did you do that?”

Steve frowned. “Because I don’t want to lose you.”

For once, Y/n had nothing to say. And that was the beginning of something neither of them saw coming.

--------------

Steve Rogers liked order. He liked predictability. He liked discipline. Y/n Y/l/n was the opposite of all of those things.

After the mission where he’d saved her, he’d expected her to tone down her antics. Maybe—just maybe—she’d realize the seriousness of the Avengers and stop treating it like some personal playground. But no. If anything, she doubled down. It was as if their moment—the rawness of it, the way her teasing had slipped into something real—unnerved her. 

So, naturally, she decided to piss him off even more.

“Rise and shine, Cap,” y/n chirped, plopping down across from him in the Avengers’ kitchen the next morning. She reached over and stole a piece of his toast before he could react.

Steve exhaled sharply. “Did you just—”

“Steal your breakfast? Yeah. Gotta keep my energy up. Super speed burns a lot of calories,” she said between bites, smirking.

He stared at her, then at his now-toastless plate. “We have plenty of food.”

“But this tastes better because it’s yours.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose, willing himself to be patient. “You do realize you almost died yesterday, right?”

Y/n rolled her eyes. “Almost died. Big difference.”

“You were reckless,” Steve snapped. “You can’t just throw yourself into danger like that.”

Her smile faltered for just a second before she covered it with another smirk. “What, worried about me, Rogers?”

Steve clenched his jaw. “We’re teammates. I look out for my team.”

Y/n leaned in, resting her chin on her hand. “Just teammates? Nothing more?”

Steve stood abruptly, chair scraping against the floor. “I don’t have time for this.”

As he walked away, he heard her laugh softly behind him.

Infuriating. Absolutely infuriating. Later that week the Avengers were in the middle of a training session, and Steve was already bracing himself for Y/n’s usual lack of discipline.

Sure enough, while everyone else was focused, y/n was… causing chaos.

“Come on, Spangles, move those legs!” she called, zipping past him in a blur.

Steve scowled, throwing his shield in a calculated arc. y/n dodged at the last second, but the shield rebounded off the wall and clipped her shoulder just enough to throw her off balance. She skidded to a stop, blinking in surprise. Then, a slow, wicked grin spread across her face.

“Ohhh. So that’s how we’re playing now?”

Before he could react, she vanished—and suddenly, she was behind him, whispering in his ear.

“Nice move, soldier. But can you keep up?”

Steve turned sharply, but she was already gone, a blur of motion. He barely had time to raise his shield before she was on him again, striking fast. For the first time, he saw something new in her eyes. A challenge. A test. And damn it, he wasn’t about to lose. He adapted. Adjusted. And little by little, he started to anticipate her moves. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he caught her—gripping her wrist just before she could land a final hit. They were both breathing hard, faces inches apart.

And suddenly, y/n was grinning. “Not bad, Cap. You might actually be fun if you weren’t so damn serious all the time.”

Steve let go, stepping back. “And you might actually be useful if you took things seriously.”

Her smirk flickered. Just for a second. Then, with a mock salute, she zipped away, leaving him standing there—frustrated, confused, and more intrigued than he cared to admit.

Meanwhile, the Team Notices

“How long do you think before they kill each other or—” Sam wiggled his eyebrows. “You know.”

Natasha smirked. “Give it a month.”

Thor laughed heartily. “I say two! But it will be glorious!”

Loki, sipping his tea, merely smirked. “Fools. It’s already begun.”

Thank youuuu for reading!! More chapters coming!! Comment if u would like to be added to a tag list!!!

chapter 2

series masterlist

[paperbag34]

Hazbin Hotel roleswap au concept? maybe?

Got bored, started thinking about "What if Alastor found Vaggie instead of Charlie", snowballed a little from there.

_______________________

Edit: an expansion: How Deals Work

_______________________

What's swapped in this AU:

For now, only Alastor and Charlie.

Alastor remains largely unchanged. He's still the Radio Demon, the terrifying overlord with a meteoric rise to prominence after killing multiple century-old overlords and broadcasting their screams, then disappeared after a fight with the TV Demon, Vox.

But, now after seven years of. well. Radio silence (lol). His radio has begun broadcasting once more. And unexpectedly, what the voice on the radio speaks of is not the brutal murder of Overlords, but instead, a pet project of his. The Hazbin Hotel, an establishment accepting all, and under his protection, with its insane goal of redeeming sinners.

No one really knows what made the Radio Demon take on such an impossible, foolish task, thuogh speculation is abound. Vox, in particular, likes to ridicule Alastor on his shows to the point where it's a bit of a running gag for his viewers. No one knows anything, except that these days, the Radio Demon is often seen around a winged cat, and an odd, gray-skinned girl.

Charlie, on the other hand, is the Princess Of Hell. To the common sinner, not much is known about her. She's more of an abstract presence since her role has her with responsibilities that don't et her get out as much. What is known is that sometimes appears after an Extermination, you can catch a glimpse of the third-most powerful demon in Hell looking around the devastated circles, cataloging the destruction.

While it's unknown how much of Hell's ruling she actually does, most of the things she attaches her name to have to do with the Extermination, or more accurately, the aftermath. Ways for sinners to get back on their feet after the exterminators pop in and trash shit, for example. Most of the Overlords don't really like having to do this, but even the greatest detractor puts the programs in place with some level of competence, after how the last Overlord to disobey her rules was... Punished.

______________________________________________________________

So, why the change of heart? Why would Alastor suddenly decide to try to redeem sinners? In a word: Vaggie.

During that particular Extermination Day, Vaggie crawls in an alley, injured and in pain. Lute left her alive, but her eye will never grow back, and she left her torn-off wings to rot in a trashcan a few steps away. Leaning against a dumpster, she decides she needs to rest.

Normally, she'd be afraid of sinners finding her, but she knows from the few of her former colleagues that she's talked to that were trapped in Hell after the Extermination ended and had to be extracted, that Sinners actually have a bit of a grace period after an Extermination, where violence is at an all time low. (She doesn't know this, but this is actually a decree by the Princess of Hell).

As she begins to drift off, however, a shadow falls over her. In canon, this would be Charlie, deciding to help what she thinks is a demon lucky enough to escape the Extermination with only a missing eye for it.

Here, though, the responsibilities of the Princess keep Charlie in her office, working and unable to go see what's been happening with the devastation. Here, her eyes snap open as she senses the aura of an Overlord, and right before everything goes dark, she realizes with horror, that whoever this demon is, he knows she's an Exorcist.

_________

When she awakes, she's tied to a table, restrained by dark tentacles that radiate demonic power in a room lit by a single bulb. The demon from before walks in, introducing himself as Alastor, and he asks for her name.

Naturally, she ignores him, instead demanding to know what he wants. She considers threatening him that she could call Exorcists down to extract her, but she knows that she's considered a traitor, and it'd never work. For some reason, the demon acquesious, and he explains that he's curious what exactly managed to harm an Exorcist so badly.

As an Overlord, he's seen and even fought off Exorcists before, and he's seen what happens when a demon harms one. They get back up. Tear an limb off and they regenerate, punch a hole through their chest and they'll be down for a while, but it'll close and they'll keep going. Suffocate one and given time, they'll start to breathe again. Even the more thorough methods of disposal simply result in the Exorcist turning into golden light and reconstituting themself or flying back to Heaven.

So, four years into his "sabbatical", when he followed the scent of an unfamiliar type of blood to the sight of an Exorcist missing their wings and an eye, he was naturally very interested. Knowing what, exactly managed to permanently harm an Exorcist is invaluable knowledge for an Overlord, after all, even though he's on a sort of sabbatical.

He threatens torture if she doesn't tell him how to kill an angel, even proposing a Deal where he won't use the knowledge against her (as long as she doesn't attack him) if she tells him. It's his turn to be surprised, however, when she just laughs, rejecting his deal only to just tell him the answer: the only thing that can harm an angel permanently is angelic power. He couldn't kill her even if she wanted him to, and with the guilt she's feeling and the pain she's in, she actually kind of wants to die.

Alastor, after some prodding, gets her to spill her story, and sensing opportunity, offers another Deal; for her to work under him in exchange for his protection, or if not, she can just leave, and he'll let her go. Demons gain power from having Deals, after all, and having one with an Angel is far too tempting.

Vaggie, believing that this is the best option she has, and that she'd probably not have to do that much more than what she'd have to even if she struck out on her own, accepts the Deal.

_________

Two years later, the two have formed a sort of "friendship?"with each other. It helps that despite Alastor being Alastor, with all the cruelty that implies, since Alastor's basically decided to disappear from politics, he has no real need for any sort of "enforcer" role for Vaggie, and she's more of an assistant than anything. She's also friends with Husk, having bonded over the collective experience of Alastor having them in a Deal, though it is strained at times since Vaggie's Deal is so much more lenient while Alastor owns Husk's soul.

It also helps that Alastor did defend her during Extermination days whenever some Exorcists tried to attack them. He doesn't want to lose his Deal with an Angel, after all!

Eventually, the topic of what goes on in Heaven when they're not down in Hell exterminating demons comes up between Vaggie and Alastor. It's all well and good until Vaggie mentions a woman she knows, and how she talks about her beloved son, and Alastor freezes. That woman? It's his mother. After some talking, Alastor tells her that his only real regret to what he's done (being a serial killer) is that his mother would be heartbroken that he'd turned out like that.

The conversation eventually turns to if Alastor could do someting she'd be proud of now, and, well. He's in Hell, there's not much he can think of right now that'd have the large impact he would want it to have. And honestly, while it does eat at him, he's had decades to make his peace with the fact that his mother would be severely disappointed in him now.

But the idea of doing something that'd make his mother proud stays with him. And eventually, after a conversation with Vaggie he comes up with the idea of redeeming sinners.

And so, one year later, Alastor's radio comes back up, and sinners start hearing of the Hazbin Hotel.

[thelittlestladylikesthis]

The Pink Rose, part 4

Part Four- July 5th, 74 ADD

Pairing: Haymitch Abernathy x reader (vaguely, part 4 is mostly filler- sorry)

Word count: 1,444

Warnings: Brief violence, weapons, and reference to death

[Y/n] had slept too late, she knew Effie was going to be upset with her. She quickly readied herself to make a Capitol appearance when they arrived. Making her way to the dining car, she prepared herself to get some snide remark about punctuality from Effie. As soon as the car door opened, [Y/n] saw Peeta slap the glass of wine from Haymitch’s hand as Peeta said, “Only not to us!”

A half second later, Haymitch punched Peeta’s jaw, knocking him to the ground before reaching for the liquor cart. Without missing a beat, [Y/n] and Katniss each grabbed a knife from the nearest place setting. Katniss drove her knife into the table between Haymitch’s hand and the bottle, barely missing his fingers. In the same second, [Y/n] expertly threw a knife and sent it directly through the space between Haymitch and Katniss causing them to lean apart from each other.

Haymitch sat back in his chair, first raising an eyebrow at [Y/n], then looking at their tributes, “Well, what’s this?” he said, “Did we actually get a pair of fighters this year?”

Peeta rose to his feet and reached for the ice for his jaw, but Haymitch stopped him.

“No,” Haymitch smirked, “Let the bruise show. The audience will think you’ve mixed it up with another tribute before you’ve even made it to the arena.”

“That’s against the rules,” Peeta shot back.

“Only if they catch you. That bruise will say you fought but you weren’t caught, even better,” 

[Y/n] opened her mouth to protest but Haymitch held up a finger and turned to Katniss. “Can you hit anything with that knife besides a table?”

With an eerily blank expression on her face, Katniss removed the knife from the table and flicked it away, lodging it directly between two of the decorative wall panels. [Y/n] and Haymitch exchanged impressed looks.

“Both of you come stand over here,” [Y/n] said seriously, nodding to the middle of the room. Not being Haymitch, the tributes obeyed. [Y/n] and Haymitch examined Katniss and Peeta. They weren’t completely malnourished and seemed strong enough.

“Well, you’re not entirely hopeless. Seem fit,” Haymitch said.

[Y/n] added, “And once the stylists get hold of you, you’ll be attractive enough for the sponsors… I would know,” 

Peeta and Katniss didn’t question this, the Hunger Games weren’t a beauty contest, but the best-looking tributes always seemed to pull more sponsors.

“All right, I’ll make a deal with you two, actually, all of you,” He looked directly at Effie that time, “You don’t interfere with my drinking, and I’ll stay sober enough to help [Y/n] help you. But you have to do exactly what I say.”

“Fine,” says Peeta.

“So help us,” Katniss interjected, “When we get to the arena, what’s the best strategy at the Cornucopia for someone—”

“One thing at a time. In a few minutes, we’ll be pulling into the station. You’ll be put in the hands of your stylists. You’re not going to like what they do to you. But no matter what it is, don’t resist,” says Haymitch.

“But —” Katniss began.

Haymitch opened his mouth and [Y/n] held up her hand that time, “No buts- just let them do their job,” she nodded at both tributes, “But if they make you too uncomfortable, you tell me and I’ll handle it,”

Haymitch left the car and the train entered the last tunnel before the Capitol. As soon as the train left the tunnel, the Capitol came into view. Peeta and Katniss ran to the window to see the ruling city of Panem. As they pulled into the station, the people begin to point at Katniss and Peeta eagerly as they recognized a tribute train rolling into the city. Katniss stepped away from the window, but Peeta stayed, waving and smiling at the crowd. He stopped once out of view.

He turned to Katniss and said “Who knows? One of them may be rich.”

[Y/n] chuckled at how fast Peeta was learning and he seemed to be ready to fight in every way. Haymitch definitely misjudged him. But [Y/n] still worried about Katniss. That girl must have a hard time trusting anyone.

*     *     *

Katniss and Peeta had an interesting introduction to the Capitol- one [Y/n] still cringed at the thought of. [Y/n] at least had an idea of what Katniss would experience- exfoliated, waxed, tweezed, and practically hosed down. Then they would take her barely covered body to go meet a stranger who would decide what she wears in front of Panem. Unlike other years, [Y/n] liked the District 12 Stylist, Cinna. Even Haymitch didn’t seem to mind him. They hoped this up-and-coming stylist would make their tributes something worthwhile.

Haymitch joined [Y/n] and Effie outside the building where the chariots were kept, but he didn’t enter with them. Finally, Effie and [Y/n] saw Cinna leading Katniss and Peeta towards the chariot. Cinna’s assistant, Portia, followed behind, fussing over every strand in Katniss’ hair. The two tributes were dressed in a simple, conservative black unitard with an uncommonly high neckline. [Y/n] remembered that she had mentioned to Cinna that for her own ceremony, she’d hated how much cleavage they made her show. The unitard was accompanied by a pair of shiny leather boots laced up to their knees. [Y/n] was most surprised to see the long billowing capes and matching headpieces. The red, orange, and yellow were an impressive contrast to the black. [Y/n] heard Cinna telling them about a synthetic fire for the costume. Of course- they weren’t coal miners this year, they were the coal!

As Katniss and Peeta’s chariot took off, [Y/n] could see them whispering to each other. She couldn’t help but hope that they would do great things. As the opening music played, [Y/n] wished Haymitch would participate more. He did say he would help- but maybe he didn’t mean public appearances. [Y/n] knew she was forcibly comfortable in the public eye, but Haymitch was not quite the flavor the public eye favored. His consistent public drunkenness was not something District 12, much less the rest of Panem was happy to accept. 

Effie, Portia, and [Y/n] watched the ceremony on their own screen where they would wait to collect their tributes. Each district’s chariot crossed the screen as they listened to the commentators give their opinions on the designs. District 1: luxury items- wore fashionable, jeweled tunics and had their skin spray painted silver. A hard act to follow for the attention of the capitol- hopefully Cinna had something extraordinary up his sleeve. [Y/n] looked around wondering if she’d get a glimpse of Haymitch when suddenly she heard the gasps and cheers for District 12! Effie and Portia were beaming as [Y/n] whipped her head around and saw her tributes on fire! Cinna and Portia’s synthetic fire was just the combination of danger, beauty, and excitement that reeled in the sponsors. The ceremony music could barely be heard behind the overwhelming cheers of Katniss and Peeta’s names, the screams of appreciation, and clapping of thousands of hands.

[Y/n] jumped as a hand rested on her shoulder and the owner said, “I didn’t know she could smile,”

Haymitch could always be counted on for a sarcastic comment. Although, it was good to see Katniss helping herself and Peeta by playing to the crowd: catching a rose, blowing kisses, and proudly holding hands- Katniss was coming out of her shell. She was going to fight. 

After the ceremony, the tributes chariots were brought inside. Effie and [Y/n] rushed to meet Katniss and Peeta with the intention of beating everyone who would want to meet them. It didn’t take long for Katniss to point out that she had made several enemies already. She’d stolen sponsors from Districts 1, 2, and 3. 

Cinna and Portia helped put out the flames. Tributes weren’t usually worried about relationships, especially because there was only one winner. But [Y/n] felt like there was something between Katniss and Peeta and wondered if she should shut that down before they literally have to try killing each other. To solidify her wondering, Peeta said something that made Katniss smile and reach up to kiss his cheek. Oh no, [Y/n] couldn’t allow that- or could she? Should she let them die happy? Or risk one of them losing the other? She figured they were 16 and it wouldn’t lead to anything anyway- at least one of them would die feeling like they’d felt something for the other. 

Masterlist

[lebirbybitch]

The first in what will hopefully be a couple of connected one-shots, and eventually compiled and made into a longer fic, because I'm genuinely obsessed with this au.

@missterious-figure

Chance Meetings

~~~~~~~|

It wasn't often that Stella got a chance to actually watch one of the brothers performing. More often than not, she was cleaning the stage and audience area in between shows, desperately trying to tidy up before the next event. She wasn't meant to be here, not truly, always having some sort of task she was meant to complete.

The Casino never slept, and neither did Stella most days. Snatches of sleep could be grabbed when she could find a place to rest, but as it was she was better off taking her far and few breaks eating if nothing else.

She could deal with being exhausted if she simply grabbed something sugary to keep her wired. Was it healthy? Absolutely not. But she didn't need to be clean and shiny for the crowd, not as maintenance. All that mattered was she avoided stains on her "uniform", and she got the jobs done she was supposed to.

But she had a break now, and a too-sweet snack bar was held limply in her hands as she watched the night time performance.

Moon was glamorous as always, perhaps not as flashy as Sun or Eclipse, but elegant. His silver tail spread and swaying with every movement, feathers shiny and full. His eyes seemed to drag over the audience, letting them know he was watching them watch him. He shone in the attention.

Stella herself was hidden behind a curtain, dull and dusty bronze and seafoam feathers catching nothing more than the dirt in the air. She knew she wasn't much to look at at all, and compared to the shining silver of Moon, she was a dirty copper penny.

It didn't stop her heart fluttering at the display, the dancing and flaunting once meant for a mate instead gathering gasps and praise. A softer part of her imagined Moon dancing for her, but she swiftly shoved that part away.

She was already breaking rules by simply watching. It wouldn't do to lose herself in a fantasy. The music began to crescendo on stage, Moon finishing up his act in his usual flourish.

Stella pulled her gaze away from the stage, carefully tucking herself into the door hidden behind the curtain, the freezing air of the backways halls causing her to shiver. She pressed her back against the door, her neglected feathers fluffed up as much as they could as she savored the image of Moon's final pose in her mind, the way the light had bounced off of him. The noise behind her settled into a dull murmur as the audience began to leave the room, discussing the show.

She sighed, rubbing the feathers on her arms to sit flat once more, wincing at the dry feel of them. A few broken ones fell to the floor, and she quickly picked them up and tossed them into a nearby trashcan.

She wasn't a performer, she reminded herself as she bit into the stale candy bar she'd grabbed from the trash, the sugar off-sweet on her tongue. Her clawed feet tapped softly against the concrete of the hall as she walked, her particular biology unable to handle being shoved into shoes. (Not that the company would give a lowly maintenance worker much more than the robes she wore already.)

She didn't have the benefit of being a star attraction's mate, not like Chica. Stella berated herself for the hot flash of jealousy that bloomed in her chest at the thought of the chicken harpy. Chica was better than Stella, pretty and graceful if nothing else.

There wasn't a being in the world who'd look at Stella's disgraceful state and call her "pretty".

Even Toby said she looked like a feather duster more than an actual bird, and if there was anyone who's opinion she'd agree with it'd be the only other employee in this damn place she actually talks to.

Even if it was only when he specifically searched her out, and could drag her away from her work.

It wasn't his fault she had to work for her stay. It's not like the company spent much money on her in the long run. And it was far easier to continue working her like a mule than trying to sell her and explain her condition, or fancy her up just to get rid of her.

So she was good at what she did. She cleaned fast, and she cleaned well, and she didn't complain when she worked a whole week without a single hour of sleep within a day. The only thing worse than the company trying to pretend she didn't exist was when they noticed her failure.

Stella shook her head, adjusting the bag on her back that held her supplies as she opened the door to the backstage, carefully looking back and forth.

Good. Nobody there.

Stella placed her bag by the hidden door, grabbing a broom that was already propped against the wall. She didn't carry one around with her everywhere like the wipes and sprays, just left a few in areas she knew she'd need them. It was simplier that way, easier to stay out of sight if she wasn't lugging around a stick that'd give her away.

The practiced motions of sweeping the stage allowed her to drift, the exhaustion that normally clung to her weighing heavier when she began a monotone task such as this.

(Later, she would attribute her lack of sleep to the lack of awareness, and how she managed to completely ignore the other person in the room.)

As she was sweeping, gaze unfocused, a shine caught her eye. Pausing in her work, Stella leaned down to pick up a button, the gold coloring shining softly in the now-dim lighting of the empty room.

"Oh good, you found it already."

Stella yelped, spinning around with the button clutched close to her chest as the broom fell with a clatter, scattering her dustpile where it collapsed.

Standing serenely across from her, face unimpressed, was the largest of the peacock brothers, Eclipse.

Stella felt a cold chill go down her back. She wasn't meant to be seen, much less by the one brother most likely to begin searching her out, or go asking questions. The last thing she needed was her meager breaks being removed entirely because she managed to completely miss Eclipse's entrance.

"I'm- I'm sorry sir, I didn't hear you enter." She managed to stammer out, forcing her feathers down and averting her gaze. "Is there something I can possibly help you with?"

Stupid stupid Stella, she muttered in her head. Don't make the very important harpy ask MORE questions.

"The button." Eclipse said simply, his smooth voice breaking Stella's internal monologue. "It fell from Moon's glove sometime during the performance, I offered to search for it. Far easier to have it simply reattached rather than waiting for a new one to be ordered."

As he spoke he walked forward, his much greater height making him tower over Stella. She herself was barely taller than the average human male, while Eclipse was easily twice her size.

With an ease that honestly impressed Stella, Eclipse leaned down and picked up her broom, holding out the cleaning impliment towards her, his other hand palm up.

"A trade, perhaps?" He crooned, gaze flicking to the hand Stella was holding the button in.

She blinked in surprise, before quickly dropping the button into Eclipse's gloved hand, pulling back and grabbing her broom as if the other harpy was on fire. Part of her felt both better and worse as she took a few steps back from the larger bird, broom clutched against her chest.

Eclipse rolled the button between his fingers, humming softly.

"I don't think I've seen you around before." He hummed, taking wide strides to circle around Stella. She stood still, trying to avoid the way her feathers wanted to rise as he shifted out of her sight.

"I'm just maintenance, sir." She replied softly, gaze locked onto the floor. "You're not supposed to."

Eclipse sighed harshly, his shadow falling over Stella.

"Do you have a name, maintenance?" He asked, seemingly biting out the last word between his teeth.

Stella shivered, closing her eyes tightly. Her name was something she kept close to her chest, not even Toby knew it. Management didn't care, it wasn't worth remembering if they weren't going to use it for advertising. She was simply a Maintenance worker, and in some occasions she'd been referred to as "the maid". But never her name.

To those in charge, she didn't have one.

"I'm just a cleaner sir." She stammered, "Just trying to do my job. Honestly, I'm nobody important."

Eclipse stepped forward, back in Stella's view. His expression seemed...dissapointed, and Stella shirked away from the barely hid anger in his gaze.

"Please sir, I'm just trying to do my job. I wouldn't want to take more of your time." Stella said softly, utterly aware of her dusty feathers and unkempt state compared to the second-most vain of the star attractions.

Heavy silence sat in the room, the dark shadows of the drawn curtains hanging over Eclipse, a thin ray of light shining on Stella. She felt like she was under a microscope, a disgusting bit of dirt being studied for her faults.

"If you must." Eclipse finally said, breaking the tension. He turned quickly, bronze tail swaying behind him. "I wish you luck with the rest of your night, Maintenance." He called, pushing through the heavy curtains to leave the room.

Stella listened to him leave, unable to pry her gaze from the floorboards of the stage as the clack of Eclipse's boots became softer and softer. The creak and shut of the door relayed his exit, and Stella collapsed, falling to her knees with the broom as her only support.

Adrenaline coursed through her, the stress of the interaction leaving her hands shaking. A few dusty feathers fell into the dust around her, her trembling body shaking them free.

Stella took a few minutes to gather herself, before standing and quickly finishing her job. Perhaps not as thorough as normal, but she didn't want to be in that room any longer. The next show was due to start within the next 10 minutes.

Stella practically ran to her next job, the scenario running through her head over and over again. She could only hope Eclipse would think her just as dull as any of the other harpies in the building, or moreso, and completely forget about her.

It wouldn't do to stress over it, she thought to herself, and then had to suppress the hysterical laughter she wanted to let out at the thought.

As if she wasn't stressed enough.

She would just have to pretend it didn't happen, and let the actual problems take priority.

Like the fact someone had apparently broken an entire wine bottle in the outside gardens, according to her hidden radio.

No rest for the weary, she supposed.

~~~~~~~~~~

[florassexperience]

A Simple Request.

Another regretevator self insert lore writing! I might actually make a fanfiction, but for now I like writing these little blurbs. I hope you like them as much as I do!

-

“No! Absolutely not. You’re not going on that elevator, you’ll create more attention to yourself than needed, and then put your people in danger. It isn’t smart.” Mach spoke quickly, quill writing in swift cursive silhouettes, she’s barely even glancing up at me, but by the whitening in her knuckles and the furrow in her overgrown brows, she’s not happy. Her jaw clenches and unclenches periodically, and she puts the paper she was writing on in a separate pile.

“I am meant to be a protector, Mach- a protector to my people! It’s what I’m training for, she’s dangerous, she’s now visiting my dreams, she knows too much about me, if she ends up telling the people I rule-“

Mach cuts me off, raising a hand to effectively make the gesture more sudden, “She won’t if you stay out of her way. She only is talking to you to frighten you. It’s what she does. You’re not going on that elevator.”

“Maybe she’s not the only reason I want to go on there.” I counter, and Mach looks up at me, pursing her lips and reaching up to scratch her jaw, leaving soft, faint marks on her skin. The marks are too red to be human. She narrows her eyes at me, and in turn I place my hands on my desk, lean in, and narrow mine back.

“Why else, then? If you’re going to continue to fight, back up your claim.” She grabs another paper and looks back down at her work, writing again with that quill. In the moment of my thought, the sound of the quill scratching against course paper becomes too much, and I snatch it out of her hand.

The glare she gives me is dangerous.

“Maybe I don’t want to only know my small village. Maybe I want to meet more people, make allies, make friends that don’t kiss my feet because they think they know me when they don’t. Maybe, I don’t know, want to have a distraction to the turmoil that is my brain? You know my thoughts consume me greater than anything else, and when I’m there that’s the only thing I have. I want to see something different for once.” My voice tapers off, and I gently hand back her quill, but she doesn’t go back to writing, but she’s still watching me.

She just doesn’t speak.

The silence is enough to make me softly break, a quiet sob gently escaping my throat, “I..I want to live again, Mach. If…If I have to be stuck here for…for eternity, I want to do it while living. I know it’s what she would’ve wanted.” A hot tear drips down my cheek, and falls from my chin and splatters onto my desk. Now she’s quiet, but it has a different air to it.

I don’t look up at her, and I stay quiet, but I hear her chair wheels rolling, and the soft heft of heavy footsteps walk around the desk and reach me.

Her arms reach to touch me, and instinctively I flinch back her, face contorting into fear as I look up at her, but she only has her arms out. More tears drip down my cheeks, and she just stands there, not walking closer, but keeping her arms out. Her eyes watch me, but her expression is softened.

I slowly inch into her embrace, and wrap my arms around her. She does the same. She’s stiff, and while this isn’t the first time we’ve hugged, it’s not enough to shake that stiffness in her mechanical body just yet. The effort and the gesture is enough to show she cares, though.

“..I’m sorry for yanking your quill out of your hand, I shouldn’t have let my frustration leak out on you.”

“I know you didn’t mean it. I forgive you. Just don’t make a habit out of it.” She pulls away from the hug, but her hands stay on my arms as I pull away as well. She reaches, carefully and slowly so I can watch her movements, and gently pats my head.

“I won’t.” I smile weakly.

She smiles back.

“Good.” She walks back to her chair and sits down, grabbing her quill again. “I’ll send you the schedule of the elevator, I will also give you a list of few locations that would be suitable for you to get on. Don’t make me regret that decision.”

My smile grows, but I pause. I had one more request.

“Go on. I can sense your pause.”

“I want to do things the way the players do. I want to get off of floors and interact with them, learn more of the world around me.”

She pauses, “Alright. No rule that says you can’t. I also surely can’t stop you. Just be careful, and know if you die you’ll be splitting yourself into the other universes. So don’t die too much.”

I nod, a gleam of hope in my heart, and I jump up and down, flapping my hands a bit. “I won’t! Thank you so much, Mach! I’ll see you! I will! I’ll get off of your floor sometimes! Thank you so much!” And with that I run off, and into the elevator portal she opens up herself, and let it close behind me.

I’ll be damned if I let anything ruin this opportunity. Even her.

[rindecisions]

Stranger Tales Part 22

Read the rest on AO3

The next work day, Robin stood in the doorway to the back room watching Steve hit his head off the freezer door. She felt like she should have interrupted him a few hits sooner than she did, but part of her was hoping he'd knock some sense into himself first.

"Okay, what's going on?" she groaned.

"I think I'm like Bowie," he grumbled, resting his head against the metal door.

Robin squinted in confusion until their conversation from the show came to mind. She laughed. "And that's bad enough for you to want a concussion?" She crossed her arms with a smirk.

"I just don't get it," Steve mumbled to the door. "How can I like guys?"

"That's a question for you to answer, not me, but sometimes you're attracted to people you might not realize were even an option."

He lightly thumped his head on the door again.

Robin heaved a sigh and pursed her lips. "Think of it this way. You just doubled your chances of getting a mark on the 'you rule' side of the board."

Steve huffed a laugh. "I don't know if I actually want to pursue this new side."

"Up to you, man," she shrugged. "But we need to open soon and the new tub of vanilla is in the freezer you're trying to concuss yourself on."

Steve laughed in defeat and stepped away from the freezer.

As the day went on, he doubled his efforts on women, desperate to not think about the fact that he could be into men.

"I think you're scaring them away more than reeling them in," Robin teased as a group of girls scurried away without buying anything.

Steve groaned and collapsed to the ground behind the counter. Even he could see how strong he was coming on.

"Bugging you that bad, huh?"

Steve groaned again and hit the back of his head off the wall.

"I really don't think you're going to thump your head hard enough to turn you straight."

Steve let out a weak laugh and turned his eyes up to her. "What do you think I should do?"

Robin crossed her arms and sucked on her lip in thought. "It's not really my place, but I guess if I had to suggest anything, it'd be to lean into it. See what this new side has to offer. It might not be as scary as you think."

Steve heaved a sigh and slumped his shoulders. "Maybe you're right."

"I usually am."

The quip got another small laugh from Steve.

When she saw him trying to get up, she offered her hand and smiled when he took the help to get to his feet.

Steve sighed and smiled almost shyly at her. "Then the next guy to walk in, I'll turn my charms on for."

"Here comes one now," she said with a smirk.

Steve braced himself and turned to face Ted Wheeler holding Holly. "Maybe the next one," he cringed at Robin.

She laughed and made the order Steve took.

[lyatudor]

Carnage Circus

Chapter 2 - No rhyme, no reason

Warning 🔞⚠️: A horror/thriller story depicting elements of blood, manipulation, death, murder, implication of sex or sex themes, abuse, guns, blood, smoking and alcohol consumption.

Fun fact: this is a chapter that has been added extra in the rewrite

Moments of freedom when she got to actually wander around were rare, if not close to impossible to obtain. Rules were made to be obeyed, never allowed to be broken, ingrained into each member of the main act. Their tents and caravans were their homes, forced into the confines of a designated space, hers more so than the others. As if Iris had done something wrong from the very second she became part of the main act. Or so she viewed her situation, a prison traded for another prison.

Yet, when they rehearsed, the main tent became her world. And during rehearsal days, though scattered in between to accommodate everyone and opened towards all staff, few, if none dared to attend when Alaric placed his name on the schedule.

Iris however, driven by sheer curiosity or madness, which were both valid in her head by that point, decided to place her name beside his. Because in truth she was nervous to return to the very town he saved her from. For three years it was as if he avoided it, spreading thin between other towns, however deep inside she knew it was only a matter of time until the circus was going to return. A show was a show, every town needed to be ticked off and the moment she found herself on known soil, her very soul became more restless.

And the only man who could hinder her more but also give her strength was Alaric.

She joined late, a path as if opening from her caravan to the main tent, steps light and not forced. She approached the main stage on silent feet, Alaric’s voice booming through the empty air. Peeking through the heavy velvet curtain, she stood and watched.

A moment of hesitation in his speech, before he opened his arms to the invisible audience, speaking about the magic of the circus, how it called to people from far and wide. She studied him, how his gloved hands flexed when he emphasized certain words that held importance in his speech and she knew the audience would eat it up immediately.

She had not known him to prepare a speech in advance, however seeing him rehearse it made him appear almost…human. He would repeat certain lines, a flourish of his voice, each line delivered to perfection as he gestured and waved his cane in the air, catching it with practiced ease.

Stepping into the main arena, a question left her lips before she could stop herself “How do you know what to say to them ahead of time?”

Alaric tipped his top hat and turned slightly towards her “And now, the main attraction, the very light of the circus, Iris Blackwell.” That rehearsed smile on his lips chilling her, calling out to her as if compelled to follow, to perform the actions, her veins hot as she stepped in the middle of the arena, placing a delicate hand into his, the leather of his worn-out gloves as if biting into her skin.

He spun her around, like a twirling doll on display, both as if dancing inside a burning room, the air leaving her lungs as her eyes caught the quick motion of the empty seats blurring in front of her vision before she came face to face with Alaric, him dipping his head, placing a kiss against her hand before leaving her to her act.

Iris shook her head as he retreated to the shadows, music assaulting her senses, her trying to speak above the sounds with no avail. She ran her trembling hands through her hair and spun around and around before she extended her hands and just continued to spin, letting the light above her pour onto her skin and the music go through her.

Even during a performance, it was not the crowd that fueled her. Eyes watching was not something she liked, but she learned early in life how to channel those feelings. What fueled her was anger and deep down the knowledge that he was also watching her. Not in the sense to ensure she was doing a good job, it was tattooed into her very essence whether she liked it or not since she joined the circus and found her act. She knew how to move, as if her body had been performing the motions for years.

But the knowledge that his dark eyes were keeping track of her every move, each smile that was falsely directed at the crowd even when she could not see them, appeared slightly genuine when she was center stage. She knew it, she felt it deep inside her bones. How his eyes would hone in on a single moment, one that appealed to him. He chose, carefully carving into his memory pieces of her performance. And the worst part was as she twirled invisible batons between fingers, was that she enjoyed performing for him.

It felt like the first time she discovered her act. Ever after years, she would still search his face or try to read his body language when she would perform a new move, trying to see if he liked it or not, approved or considered it too much. Yet he never reprimanded her for anything new and in a sense she sort of wished he did. For him to tell her it’s too much, or too little. That she shouldn’t have smiled too bright or broad. That her hair didn’t flow properly or she was too focused or not enough in the middle of her performance. But no, Alaric looked at her, if he ever met her gaze briefly, like it was for the very first time.

Iris never believed in magic until Carnage Circus. Even then, as she spun around invisible threads of fire, she still considered it an abstract notion. Something reserved perhaps for holly people or the complete opposite who dared to look into the eyes of darkness and realize there was more. She was neither, not even in between. All her life a bystander even to her own existence. She was good at ripping herself away from moments she did not wish to belong in. Like a ghost outside of her body, looking down on whatever scene played, with such indifference witnessing her very soul flicker out of existence each disgusting scene after another.

It had been a long time since she felt something call out to her, the craziest notion and set of circumstances when she witnessed the circus for the first time and saw him. By any standards he was just a man, or so she tried to convince herself. Everything had to be just smoke and mirrors, tricks of the light. For that made sense to her inside a very real and raw world.

What did not was the pull she felt towards him, as if he held in his very hands, the answers she had been searching for all her life. Having her heart tremble and at the same time beat faster was foreign. She was not a child or a teen to believe in fantasies, all those were taken away from her long ago.

But when she witnessed him, speaking to the crowd, staring into her eyes as if he knew her, the lines “You have come to the right place. I have been waiting for you.” something told her she needed to act no matter what. That it was this, him or nothing at all.

Concluding her performance, Iris stared at the empty seat, the very one she sat in when she looked upon the show for the very first time, her chest heaving slightly.

Alaric watched her from the sides, slowly lifting his hands to clap, startling her out of her thoughts “To answer your previous question, while you are rather new, I have been doing this for far longer than you. So you get used to the cities, to the people and what they wish to hear.”

She breathed out slowly “Then why do you rehearse?”

He slowly approached, not entering the light “Because change is imperative to keep things going, be it staff, attractions or a simple speech.”

She averted her gaze for a second, looking back at the chair she sat in once “Yet you have had the same staff for quite a number of years now.”

His eyes narrowed slightly despite her not paying attention to him “Less…hassle so to speak. Plus, you needed some consistency. I can’t have you thinking last in, first out.”

A single side glance, as if to assure herself he was still in the same spot. She heard the stories, everyone has. It was as if they surfaced when the circus was in town and died with it leaving “So everyone is replaceable one way or another?”

Alaric stepped forward into the light, the shadows still following him, his face obscured “Yes and no.”

She never did enjoy the cryptic messages, how he spoke to her as if in riddles, but then she noticed something, his lips moving without any sound coming out of his mouth, as if he was testing the words on his tongue before speaking.

“All are replaceable apart from you.”

Her eyes widened slightly, the words as if hitting something deep within her “Even you?” she asked before she even allowed for the question to linger in her mind. Alaric nodded his head, confusion clouding her mind. He was the director, he was famous, known. Feared…

“I don’t believe you are replaceable.” She saw the way his jaw tensed, as if doubt crept inside of him and in all honesty why should he believe her words, she rarely was on his side even on good days “You’re the head of the circus, you” she hesitated “control everything. Without you it would fall apart.”

Alaric shook his head “No, another would take over, the second in command, as it has always…” the words failed him “as it is intended.”

Her eyes widened slightly, taking a step towards him “You hesitated. How did you become the director?”

A long pause “I was called, nominated…forced” even the word itself was spoken roughly as if dragged with great effort from his mouth. Around the light, shadows loamed, circling them, trying to push through.

She hesitated before speaking, but a part of her wanted, no, needed to know “You never wished to be the director?” she asked as if testing the waters before adding “It all changed with you, the name, the theme.” All facts on display.

Alaric closed his eyes taking a step back, stopping when Iris took hold of his cane, eyes searching for answers in the darkness that was him, her light making his head spin. He knew he should give her an answer, tell her something, show her some things to keep her close or at the very least draw her closer as it should be. Even if his words failed him, the curse not allowing him to tell her everything, he could still work around some of the limitations imposed on him. But it was not fair in his eyes, she should understand from one look, be in tune with him, not against him.

Pulling at the cane she resisted “Answer me.”

The demanding tone made his teeth grit, a forceful pull making her let go and fall back a step as he retreated back behind the light. He watched her, whispers in his ears darkening his mind. A heavy sigh left his lips before he departed, Iris calling after him. He stopped before disappearing behind the heavy velvet curtains, a few motions in the dirt below his feet with his cane and then he was gone.

She approached slowly, glancing at one word written in the dirt “No.” and her heart felt an inexplicable ache. If he never wished to be the director, was forced by powers beyond his control then what chance did she have for salvation?

[brilliantfantasticgeronimo]

66.7512 meters episode!!!

i think i broke his heart! oh well!!!! ÑLKÑLK ruby y are u so happy about this all the time skfljdks1 (waiting for the karmic writing where someone breaks *her* heart....). tbh also very doctor-like. they are *so* unhinged

i was looking for some Spin-off foreshadowing in this war between land and sea business but best i've got is that... it will probably be set in wales ksdlfj

nuclear war is hilarious. fiften u are not all right.

That's the most bizarre "circle" ive ever seen. if anything is the orthogonal projection of a geodesic dome.

"A pee around the back"…….. dr pee foreshadowing

AESOP #1: children, when u are doing "off the road tourism", don't disturb sacred sites

susan twist's "thing" is just gonna be: "take revenge from being killed so many times". like she's just red-shirting all over the place (maybe it's gonna be a bit of meta commentary of the high body count of this show? that it's all for our sadistic pleasure but doesn't always have real significance skfldj)

I guess inflation is a recurring theme this season?

liminal spaaaace

"and then there's the blood""w-what blood?" i laughed ngl sksksk

the different color fonts in iplayer are a bit distracting tbh…...

ah yes. welsh racism...

hmmm… runy sitting in the chair... to wait in front of the tardis... "The one who waits?"

Thats' what men do skdksk love me some "Intergalactic fuck boy" subtext being voice and made text

Poor ruby ):

it's about the [metaphor for being stigmatized]!!!

Ohh the doctor was the first to disappear by the curse, maybe?

"even ur real mother didnt want u" Bro this monster is so mean wtf Kate!!!

AGAINST HIM, SOMETIMES!!!!!!!!! Antagonist kate be coming!!!

"well, that's classified"

This timeline might be suspended along ur event???

WE INVENT THE RULES AND MAKE THEM WORK!!! THEMES!! YOU HAVE TO COUNT EVERY GRAIN OF SALT!!! IT'S THE GAME THEME CONNECTING TO THE SUPERSTITION THEME!!!!!!!!

theeeemes

the more unit gets competent the more sinister they become

her going "cheers!" to her personal satan. i love u ruby

FUCK YEAH. ICON. GO KILL THE PRIME.MINISTER

...only guys in ruby's little montage ]: im heartbroken T.T rip the x5 times wlw companions streak dream it seems

"except the bed thing that was u" narrator voice: it wasnt

"Which is what?" KILL THE PM KILL THE PM DO IT ICON

Rtd connected to the universe skskdk oh beautiful synergy

[also literally how Y&Y starts... ]

"No more" feels loaded/intentional here, considering how it's been used before as an Important Phrase is War's arc.

the emo advisor guy intrigues me

Ruby having to solve this whole thing + cold war vibes.... mmm very ace coded

[lol @ soc dem / liberal writers being so scared of "populism" and "the dumbness of crowds". peak soc dem / liberal] [what is a "political allegory story" by a soc dem without the punchline being that "I think The People are really fucking Stupid actually"] [i do enjoy the side point of british politicians being so desperate for relevancy that they fire nuclear missiles for the fun of it. yeah… that tracks]

[lol becoming independent from nato being a bad thing. lol #"fucklybia!!"#signed:thisepisode]

the directing is very fun in this

Ruby get on your feets and make it happen

She's gonna say u forgot to say hi to this lady

ruby's asking to be shot again sksks

Iris u say…........ eyes emoji

[ok but also. lol not to go " ah, peak liberal again!" but lol. this resolution is peak liberal [ie. fundamentally antidemocratic, a few 1% technocrats (obvs, privileged and from the global north) with the answers "know what's best"]. this lad may have been crazy but they voted for him for a reason that "the system" wasnt providing.but in typical soc dem fashion they can't ever fight the fascists on The Real Deal ie. strength of a proposed political project + material gains resulted from those political projects + committing to real system change, so they have to scramble for antidemocratic solutions like [timey wimey prisons] to ""fight facism""" (ie not fighting it at all and by proxy, just making the fucking cockroaches stronger each "election cycle" because they can't fight them in a meaningful, political sense) bc the people are just too stupid!!! and this is why democracy was a mistake!!!!!!! ... sigh rtd. oh well good thing i didn't expect more on this front tbh sdlkjfdsd in that sense the s1-s4 rewatch prepared me well lol]

clara vibes in this ep in a lot of moments (old!ruby, sort of "mausoleum tardis", etc)

"i didnt travel with him long..." "but it felt like a lifetime" became literal…

"Everyone has abandoned me my whole life" T_T

AESOP #2: kids u are never alone <3 u always have ur inner demons :) and the unrelenting spectra of death~

There's always something a bit unsatisfying about self closing paradoxes... kinda like "oh it was all a dream so it didnt matter". but i think in this one it was crunchy enough with other things that i think it was balanced.

Very turn left-y ending! CONCLUSIONS!! people kept saying in the press this episode was gonna be "super scary" tbh i just found it.... profoundly sad sdxkljflkfj ruby's life just *screams* "missing the important bits by focusing on the unimportant" and "obsessing over things that don't matter" and "companion becomes detached from real life to the point they become super unhinged and callous" ("im sorry i couldn't help you marti")

(c+p some stuff i put on a discord): tbh i rolled my eyes at the political stuff but i don't think im even mad about it this time lol (too tired irl to get properly angry at doctor who these days ig)

anyway i dont think the political stuff is what it was really "about". i found this story very moving on what it was (imo) rlly about: ruby's fear and experience of being abandoned and also the general "fear of approaching death"

and obvs a bit of other emotional beats that are more specific to doctor who's long running stories: like the doctor "always does this" ie leaves everyone of his friends behind and there's the lingering tragedy that this will happen, as well, to ruby inevitably, then also both ruby and the doc becoming 'detached' from real life (ruby basically never investing anything in those relationships w/ those guys bc she was 'absorbed' by this mystery /clearly a parallel to her being absorbed by her parental origin) and also how tourists cant watch where they step / the doctor and co arent always respectful to the 'silly traditions' of the places they visit (tbh excellent bc to overcome my "this show has the white man's burden' engraved in its dna" meta... the show is gonna have to keep making story like and like Demons of Punjab for at least 3 more decades lol) (basically tldr i think it fumbled the politics stuff but it was rlly crunchy where it mattered. also, ....... i think this pretty much confirms that ruby isn't her own mother / the person who let herself at the door step in Christmas, right??? like rtd had said was the short story he had concocted years ago, and was the insp for this... but he kinda used up that trick here… so it must be something/someone else, right?) (another thing: ruby going "i used to be able to make it snow" made smth click....... ---> if ruby's whole focus rn seems to be about "the mystery", and this quest seems to be not only something she *needs* but also something that like... means joy and adventure, and traveling with the doctor... when she finds out the Truth,,, that probably means all the whimsy in her life will go away? (so she may come to a point where she Doesn't want to know Actually (which would be very "thirteen regretting throwing away the watch" realness mirror again)