#in the way he couldn't for paul and claudia

[pynkhues]

brat lestat and brat tamer louis are literally so dear to me 😩😩 i love how you always write that aspect of each other and as a couple so well in your stories and to a degree that is so in character and realistic, thank you for your writing always 🤩

Ah! You're so welcome, anon, and thank you! I have a lot of fun with it, and I personally feel it's authentic to them as a dynamic (particularly with Lestat never really being in control of himself, as Sam said in the recent press events, which I think comes through in the show too, and Louis, in my interpretation, needing a degree of control over himself, his life and how he interacts with those around him to be not only empowered / rooted in himself, but to be happy). I don't know, it makes sense to me, and I'm always so thrilled to hear that the way I write it makes sense for others too.

[yusiyomogi]

i think when louis says that lestat was his "murderer, mentor, lover and maker" all parts of this are equally important in the eventual failing of their relationship and louis' struggles as a vampire. i mean, aside from obvious power imbalance and complete shift of louis' support system onto one person. and the one role that's discussed the least, i think, is the "mentor" one.

vampirism in iwtv is usually discussed as clear-cut queer allegory, where the struggle of louis to accept his nature depicted in parallel with his struggle to accept himself as a gay man. but i feel like vampirism represented more than one thing for him and definitely represented more than one thing in the narrative. one of those things is that louis saw vampirism as yet another role he was expected to fill and couldn't. he felt like "a botched vampire", as he said hundred years later. "i'm never gonna get control over it", "i can't do it", "throw me into incinerator and make another one", "afraid to disappoint" etc.

there's a continuous thread of guilt for never meeting lestat's expectations of him, which i think culminated in the end of s1e2, where lestat lost patience and yelled at him for not accepting his nature. lestat didn't understand the whole complexity of the issue, but obviously he couldn't read louis' thoughts anymore. and then lestat's antagonism makes louis put up the defense mechanism, where he basically "rebels" against lestat's way of life, similar to a teenager who rebels against expectations of their parents or teachers they can't meet.

a large part of it ofc that louis did grow up with a lot of impossible expectations placed on him, many difficult roles to fill. we see that he was a constant disappointment for his mother, never "enough" for her, not even when he had to do something horrible to keep her financially safe. she never accepted his sexuality and everything connected to it, like him not getting married or not being enough of a man in the eyes of society. the way she blames him for paul's death demonstrates the dynamic they've probably had for decades at that point, as louis most likely was the child his parent held all the hopes for and he "failed" each of them, so he was always the one responsible in their eyes.

despite doing his best, despite giving everything to his family, he was never enough. and that's the big thing for him, that why i think that the softest word for claudia he could think of was "it would be enough" for him if she was the last vampire on earth, as this is what he always wanted to hear from his parents, from anyone. and also probably why he - unfairly - felt like she betrayed him when she wanted to leave him for the theatre and then madeleine.

i felt like louis was never truly proud of the way he chose to live, because it was also a defense mechanism, not his true feelings. i think morality of his choice matters very little in the grand scheme of the story, but i also don't think that the problem was that he refused to accept what lestat wanted him to be. the problem was that louis always wanted to be something else, but didn't have the environment and mental state to do this. most of all, the unhealthy choice to stop drinking human's blood was a desperate response to pressure he experienced from all the directions.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep8 Musings - LDPDL: Burning Questions

I was reading this Variety article, and they mentioned something that made me think of fan critiques of Louis' opaque motivations in the finale, and the fun laughs we've shared over how he's so unbothered by vamp nonsense that he never seems to ask important questions.

I'm drafting a separate post specifically about "Vampire Grace," but I wanted to focus here on only one point in particular:

PAUL.

We always talk about whether Louis chose Lestat over Claudia; "you take him with you, in HERE!" But I haven't seen talk about how Louis chose Lestat over Paul, and how that factors into Lou's habit of not asking HELLA important questions that could've saved Loustat DECADES of resentment.

Paul's suicide "opened the series," setting this whole thing in motion. Florence blames Louis for his death, making Lou feel like a failure.

--the first time we see Louis outright say to someone's face "I love you," it's mere seconds b4 Paul jumps off a roof. (The only other person we see him say it to is Armand, right after saying they're not companions. 💀)

Paul's memory is wrapped up in Louis' love of Lestat, cuz until Les showed up, Paul had been Lou's one and only companion--the sole person he could TALK to. As a closeted gay man, Lou was desperate for MALE companionship: understanding, acceptance & love.

Sure, he had Grace & Lily (& later Claudia)--all WOMEN--but:

his daddy's dead, and who knows what their deal was, but it couldn't be worse than effing Florence. So there's a lingering want of a father-figure; someone older/wiser who could teach & guide Lou when he was feeling "lost...in a dark way" (*cough* Armand *cough*)

a father or brother is still not the companion Louis REALLY wants/needs, so ofc there's things Lou can't tell Paul, or have with him. Les's an upgraded Paul-- a HUSBAND, not a SIBLING (*cough* Claudia *cough*).

(deep down) Lou was jealous of how candid & honest Paul was; regardless that Paul's lack of a filter was a side effect of his mental illness & religious fanaticism (cuz vampirism's an allegory for sexuality--and even in gay mecca Paris & SanFran Lou was still tryna "find himself" as the Zodiac Killer *cough Daniel *cough*)

Paul's dying wish was for Loustat to never be together

and Lou felt he'd betrayed Paul; that he'd lied/hadn't kept his word

folding like a leaf rather than saying NO, or killing himself like he'd implied (suicide by vampire instead of cane-sword/alcohol poisoning)

(and Queen Claudia called Lestat the "Father of Lies" (aka The Devil), and she ain't never lie a day in her life, either)

So the Catholic guilt was extra strong, cuz Saint Paul was right about Les; but Lou chose Les anyway--in the church, on the altar--after Paul died trusting that Lou WOULDN'T take him back.

Instead, we get this boatload of excuses from Louis about the "vampire bond," when the only bond that matters is LOVE. But this is the crux of Louis' personality/problems, and why the interview took so long for him to attempt either the 1st or 2nd time around. Cuz Louis is a hypocritical coward stuffed to gills with self-loathing & GUILT. He runs away from the truth, he runs away from his issues, and he hides from himself and everyone around him.

So OF COURSE Louis doesn't ask important questions. It's not that he doesn't care--it's that HE'S SCARED of asking, and terrified of what the answer is. So it takes him forever to even BEGIN addressing the elephants in the room.

Louis ALWAYS suspected. But he was:

Scared of the answer/truth

Scared that Les would LIE

Scared he'd forgive Les regardless

Paul died in 1911. It had been 26 YEARS until Lou finally piped up in 1937 (the end of Les's Grovel Era). But this was the PERFECT chance to call Les' bluff & get some honest answers out of him for once, cuz:

If Les (unapologetically) caused Paul's death, he can just stay gone

It's in Les' best interest to tell the truth regardless, cuz he's been desperately tryna get back in Lou's (& Claudia's) good graces for 6 years, and being sincere will earn him more cookies (he'd also be banking on Lou forgiving him regardless, cuz he's been missing Les so bad, even after being beat into the next decade & dropped a billion miles in the air)

If Les IS lying, how would they even frikkin know if they can't read his mind? Lou just wants to see what Les will say

(In 2x6 he waited to ask Madeleine if she only saw Claudia as a replacement for her dead sister--a question he should've asked BEFORE he Turned her, but... 🤷 Moot.)

So in the finale, there's 2 painful truths Lou has to contend with:

WHY is he doing the 2nd interview?

WHO saved him during the Trial?

It takes Louis 77 YEARS to reclaim the "pieces of myself" he'd lost/forgotten. He ALWAYS knew things weren't adding up with Armand. He KNEW there were things missing. Even in SanFran, BEFORE the mind-wipe, he was already losing his mind/memories--PTSD from all the awful things he'd been through.

Even book!Louis knew about Claudia's diaries for a decade b4 he finally got the courage to ask the Talamasca if he could read them & speak to her ghost.

Although Lou's naive AF, he's not an idiot--he HAD A HUNCH that Armand knew more than he was letting on, which is precisely why he kept ignoring Armand every time he asked to stop the interview.

However, for once, Lou actually wastes VERY little time with this one:

As soon as he learns the truth about "Banishment," he divorces Armand, and runs back to NOLA to find Lestat. Memory is a monster Lou'd been running scared from all this time. He's tired of running away, wasting so much time, wasting the gift, when he could be actively tryna solve his problems to make life bearable/better. The hellish prison he'd lived in was by his own design--only he could chose to stand up, take control of his life; and finally ask the burning questions. "Truth and reconciliation."

Lou could finally make peace with the memory of the two people he'd been avoiding for so long; whom he felt he'd let down the most:

For once Lou chooses to be "companion enough for myself," and live with/for himself, not relying other people to save/fix/determine his life for him anymore. That's really the only way he'll be able to be with Les in a healthier, guilt-free relationship in the future.

[loumandforyou]

What makes me think Louis is really into Armand is that scene with Madeleine "why don't you want him to know how much you love him?"

I'm sorry, I know you won't like this, but I honestly think that was Madeleine sensing Louis' feelings about Lestat, not Armand. I might be wrong, it's open to interpretation (and I think Louis has feelings for Armand), but the show makes a big point of Louis never saying "I love you" to Lestat or even Claudia because he's terrified to say that to someone he loves after Paul. And then it shows him easily saying it to Armand, and dreamstat (who both Jacob and Sam have said reflects Louis' internal/real feelings) being amused and mocking it with "I looove you"). So Madeleine saying "why don't you want him to know" doesn't make much sense as being about someone he's said "I love you" too (and we know that Louis' strong feelings of love for Lestat are still there at that point, as much as he doesn't want them to be), and Louis easily saying "I love you" if he really means it doesn't make sense either.

I thought Dreamstat was a clever way to get us inside Louis' head in the Paris years in a way that his Dubai voiceover or his conversations with other characters couldn't. It does undermine the romance of Loumand, but I think that's the story the show is telling. As you said, they're all about Loustat. But that doesn't mean it has to be that way in your fic, fics can be whatever you want them to be! I've enjoyed fics where Claudia never dies as my own person fix-it lol

Kindly, I disagree. I think Madeleine can tell the difference. She couldn't just sense he loves someone, she could feel how Louis feels when she is around Armand.

Anyway, you clearly think differently and I'm not trying to change your mind here but the key word is "how much". Not that he loves him at all. Louis said I love you before he meant it and then he stopped saying it cause it got real. Not to mention that the timing of it. If it was about Lestat, why show it just before the betrayal? Where is the tragedy in that?

Other relationships can be strong, too, you know. Doesn't mean Lou.stat wasn't important. And.. i don't think I've said it's all about Lestat/Lou.stat, I said this is how the fandom and Danny interpret it cause Louis shares a glimpse of his story with Armand. Louis is so much more than loving one man in his entire life.

[plantmommoonbaby]

I have covid (rant about that later), and to keep my mind from rotting, I'm rewatching IwtV. So, please enjoy

My Delirious Ramblings about Our Favorite Beautiful Vampire Divorcés (pt 1)

Episode 1:

It feels like it means something that went Lestat does the mind control thing, his victims eyes look like his

Uuugh i saw a tumblr post wondering if the widow du Pointe duLac ever convinced herself Louis pushed Paul so she could believe Paul went to heaven and 😭

That means his mother starts to see him as a monster the literal morning he chooses to become a monster

God, if she never subtle accused him, would he even have agreed to Lestat's offer??

Louis talking over what Lestat said to convince him makes me think all he had to say was that he loved him...

I mean... valid since he just lost his mother's love 💔

Episode 2:

Ummm, Louis, why do you have a painting by your grampa??

Armand isn't even acting in this scene, is he? Boy worships Louis

But, like... how is Armand--sorry, Rashid 🙄 being the only staff member who doesn't mask not a dead give away?

Louis's eyes go green when he has blood lust

Tiny buns 💓

I have a hard time believing Louis diets out of compassion when he'll eat a hogtied endangered species...

God bless Grace du Pointe du Lac

You can say you aren't buying in to the killing, Louis... but your eyes are very green...

Oop, Daniel couldn't stay objective while reliving that little dish... this is when the lines start getting blurry

Episode 3:

It has to be a superiority thing, coz the way he ate that poor kitty was brutal...

Daniel has not kiki'd over exes enough and it shows. Louis reeks of missing his ex. You don't point out how obvious it is until after a few drinks and making sure he can't slide into the DMs first...

Ooooh if looks could kill. Our literal green eyed monster damn near drained Antoinette right there... I guarantee the only reason he didn't is because he thought Lestat was going to drain her later

Checking to make sure Lestat is paying attention before making Jonah think about "them old days" 💀 Louis said "fuck around and find out, Daddy 😘"

Jonah, I know a certain European who is cares a whole lot about who you are looking at, and I'm pretty fucking sure he's not gonna be sensible about it...

Louis, you're not you when you're hungry...

Lestat plays fucked up games, but seeing Louis's green eyes and knowing he isn't stable enough to actually restrain himself and then hurting himself to get them all out is actually pretty respectful of his diet...

Lestat wasn't wrong about Louis being a natural... he's just a natural serial killer, not hunter. He has to want to kill his victim...

Louis kicks in one door, his sister sees him as the devil. He kicks in another and Claudia sees him as an angel 😭😭😭 IM NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING

I think I need a nap...

[randomfandomss]

I mean if Rolin said that the main reason they wouldn’t show Daniel’s tuning is because it would mean they’d have to re-build a set they’re not going to re-build because it’s too much effort/$$$… that’s him also confirming that Daniel’s turning DID happen in Dubai/the penthouse. Otherwise it wouldn’t be an issue and they could show it in S3 but like, he said it *because* that’s where it happened, unless I’m missing something 🤔

Oops sorry, I guess I didn't remember the whole comment but I still strongly feel it's such bs. He is definitely trolling us.

First of all, he literally can't and shouldn't be telling us what happened or didn't happen.

On top of that the reason is kinda lame according to me. They couldn't film because the set has been destroyed? Come onn. I don't think so. They could've filmed and then destroyed the set then maybe.

If they won't show us Daniel's turning then it must be because it is important for the way the story unfolds. If that is so, then I'm excited to see what's the reason.

From what I can gauge, Rolin and co. respect the story too much to not show such important moments they know the fans are dying to see. They simply won't do that and if they do, it must be due to strong reasons.

Also I feel it would be a bit sudden if Louis moves to some other place in the beginning of s3 after finally have carved out a space for himself in the Dubai penthouse. After decorating it, putting up Paul's portrait and Claudia's dress.

I think that place, at this point, holds a lot of meaning to not come into picture at all at any point in the future.

[blacclotusss]

What Can the Damned Really Say to the Damned?

Just a bit of meta on my favorite scenes from episode one of season two!

Louis and Lestat in the Field

At this point and time, using context clues, we know Lestat is conjured up from Louis' mind. Personally, I think Louis conjured him up due to the fact that he's surrounded by dead bodies and the most recent "dead" body he's cared about is Lestat. So now, he's thinking of his past love and the murder of him, the only time he's felt like he murdered someone. "Oh love, I'm merely waiting until you're happy." This seems to be the opposite of what Lestat has done to Louis in season one. He would always try and catch Louis when he was down and make the situation worse e.g. Paul's death, the church turning, the closing of the Azalea, the riots, etc. It's interesting, especially, considering Lestat isn't actually saying any of this. Crazy how Louis' brain is working in this moment. A friend of mine also brought up that Louis is in a period of desperation and despair and I think it may have brought up thoughts of home, the home they left Lestat to die in.

Claudia and Louis' Argument in the Boiler Room

The first time we actually hear, from her own mouth, how much Claudia resents Louis for the fact that Lestat is still looming over them. "I forgave you for messing up my plan, I did not forgive you for bringing him with you." Louis, in that moment, seems to want to make nice with people on their journey and dismisses Claudia's concerns and ideas, which may build even more resentment. "I'm looking for one, just one, that ain't a goddamn bastard!" Her search for vampires seems to be her both wanting answers as well as her own companion to escape the bastards she's encountered as a vampire.

Claudia's Dreams/Nightmares

This one is a bit tricky for me to understand because the only thing I can think of what Louis is trying to say is that she is lying, but I don't think he'd call her a liar. I believe Claudia only said she couldn't dream because Louis was getting on her nerves. I hope to God that is not the angle we're going with because I will personally raise hell for her.

Morgan Asking Louis for Help

Very short point but it's so interesting that Morgan thought Louis would help and I was somewhat surprised that Louis left it alone. I think that those four years have hardened him just a bit and he's over the humans for now. Another point, a bit of racism slipping through that Morgan thought the Black man was going to help.

Daciana and the Fire

Two interpretations of this scene and I'd like to believe that the both of them have some truth to it. One (brought to me by my friend @nakiaslilhoodoo), Daciana and her killing her children relating to Claudia. Even in season one, we see just how much he cares for Claudia, even going so far as to postponing his suicide so that she wouldn't have the memory of her brother dying on the same day as the beginning of her journey of traveling. I think Daciana jumping into the fire after losing her children could show how Louis will lick the fire (internally) once Claudia is gone. 

Two (another point made by a friend of mine, Daciana and Magnus being one in the same in this scene. The both of them walked into the fire after feeling defeated with having no companion. I didn't realize this until a friend brought it up to me and I think it makes the situation even more tragic.

Louis' Speech to Claudia

A very bittersweet moment for me, and the way the trailers and clips are set up makes me believe this may fall apart. I thought I'd feel stronger about Louis telling Claudia about having a shitty life, I still don't think it was quite necessary because I'm sure she knows that and her life was shitty before she even met Louis, but it didn't leave a poor taste in my mouth like I thought it would. The soft words he gave her was what genuinely broke me. I think it hit me because I know Louis genuinely believes what he said to her and how it's her and him against the world, but I know it's going to go left. Even when they held hands together after getting off of the van, they really could be everything if they keep each other close. You could tell by Claudia's face that she's been waiting to hear that from, (Delainey said this as well) but she also seems a bit skeptical and questioning whether he'll stick to his words, which I don't blame her for. And then Louis conjuring up Lestat as he's telling her this...I know there will be problems on the rise.

Louis and Armand in the Bedroom

First of all, the bedroom seems to be gorgeous and I would pick it apart more if it weren't for the bars and the painting in the back. The bars are a bit jarring because I don't know who they would represent. Would it be Louis feeling confined to this relationship and life he's made with Armand or would it represent Armand holding back his emotions and how he feels? And the painting of Jesus and Judas, who betrayed Jesus, hanging in the back is a wild concept. But, I did enjoy the softness each of them displayed with one another. The talk of Claudia's diary pages could have easily blew up into an argument, but they each know each other well enough for it to remain calm. Even Louis' face before he kissed Armand was quite reassuring. Love what I see from these two so far.

[shellkissed]

could we get a cute kwp x reader where he meets her parent for the first time 🫶🏻 love ur work <3

Authors note: ofc anon! thank you so much!

Meeting the Parents

Kevin William Paul x fem!reader

You had been dating Kevin for a few months now, and it felt like everything was moving at just the right pace. He was kind, funny, and the type of guy you could easily picture a future with. But, as much as you loved him, you couldn't shake the nerves about the idea of him meeting your parents for the first time.

It wasn’t that you thought they’d be difficult—your parents were actually quite easygoing—but the pressure of introducing someone you cared about to your family always brought up those little butterflies.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” You asked him, pacing in your living room as Kevin leaned casually against the doorframe.

“Of course, babe. I’ve met a lot of people's families in my life,” Kevin said, his deep voice smooth with that easy confidence you adored. “Besides, I wanna meet the people who raised such a beautiful girl.”

You paused in your tracks, turning to give him a soft, grateful smile. The sincerity in his eyes made your nerves settle a little. "Thanks, Kevin. It’s just… you know how parents can be."

“I’ve got this,” he said with a grin. “I’ll charm them. Don’t worry.” He winked, and your heart did a little flip.

Before you knew it, you were sitting in the car, Kevin's hand resting on your knee, your fingers lightly entwined with his as you both made the short drive to your family’s home.

When you arrived, your mom was the first to greet you at the door, as always. She was all smiles, arms wide open to hug you as she stepped aside to let you both in. “There you are! I was starting to think you weren’t going to show up at all!” she teased, pulling you into a warm embrace.

You chuckled and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Sorry, we’re here now.”

Kevin smiled nervously behind you, stepping inside and offering a polite wave. “Hi, Mrs. Y/L/N, it’s really nice to meet you.”

“Oh, none of that ‘Mrs. Y/L/N’ nonsense,” your mom said with a warm laugh, reaching out to shake his hand. “You call me Claudia, Kevin. None of that formal stuff around here.”

Kevin smiled, clearly relieved by her friendly demeanor. "Okay, sounds good. Thank you."

Your dad appeared next, offering a hearty handshake to Kevin. “Welcome to the chaos,” he said with a chuckle, gesturing around at the family photos and clutter that decorated your living room. “It’s good to finally meet you, Kevin. Y/N talks about you a lot.”

You felt your cheeks heat up, and you tried to pretend you weren’t thinking about all the times you’d gushed about him to your parents in the past. It wasn’t hard—after all, Kevin was always on your mind. Your dad gave you a knowing smile, which only made you blush more.

Kevin, though, seemed unfazed by the attention. He was a social guy, but you knew he had a soft spot for making a good first impression. As you all sat down to dinner, he engaged your parents with the same easy charm that you’d come to love.

“I’ll tell you, Kevin,” your dad said between bites of steak, “I was a little concerned at first. Y/N has always been so independent, and I wasn’t sure if anyone would be able to keep up with her.”

Kevin’s smile softened, and he reached over to take your hand. “I’m up for the challenge,” he said, voice warm but playful. “I think we make a great team.”

Your heart skipped a beat as you caught your mom’s knowing smile from across the table. She was probably already imagining your future together, and you couldn't blame her—it was hard not to when you had someone like Kevin by your side.

The rest of the evening passed in a blur of laughter, light teasing, and casual conversation. Kevin fit in seamlessly, cracking jokes with your dad, asking your mom about her garden, and even making fun of you in the way only someone who was truly comfortable with you could. He had a way of making everyone feel at ease, and you couldn’t help but admire him for it.

When it was time to go, your parents waved you off from the doorstep. “It was great meeting you, Kevin!” your mom said with a big smile. “You’re welcome here anytime.”

Kevin grinned, his hand resting lightly on the small of your back as he nodded. “I’ll take you up on that, Mrs. Y/L/N. I mean… Claudia.”

You laughed, feeling the last of your nerves melt away. “You did great,” you said, giving him a playful nudge as you walked toward the car.

Kevin opened the door for you, his grin still wide. “Told you I’d charm them.”

“I’ll give you that,” you said, shaking your head fondly as you climbed into the passenger seat. “You were perfect.”

Kevin slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment. “Well, they raised an amazing person, so it wasn’t hard.”

Your heart swelled. He was too good to be true. “You’re amazing too, you know that?”

He winked at you as he drove off, his hand finding yours again. “Yeah, I know. But I’m glad they think so, too.”

And at that, you couldn't't help but lean in and give him a soft kiss on his cheek.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Authors Note: kwp I love you with all my heart

[pynkhues]

I think it does make more sense to cover the trial earlier in season 3 rather than later. In the book vs the show trial, it’s relatively clear that Lestat isn’t fully responsible for Claudia’s death, and Armand takes credit for it by the end of the first book. I think the show will want to clarify that because it’s a lot more complicated than her relatively simple execution in the books. It doesn’t make sense to lead the audience along that way when some viewers won’t know if Lestat really did that or not, unlike the books where you do get that it wasn’t his idea, just not to what extent he was tortured into participating.

(x)

Agreed, anon. I also think it could really hinder the momentum of the season if it feels like we're ultimately building to the same place we were across s1 and s2, where the question of what happened to Claudia really underpins Louis' emotional journey.

I was thinking about this on the train earlier, but in a lot of ways the tragedy of Claudia is actually really different for Louis and Lestat, which is actually where the show left us with the reunion. Louis' story is bookended by the loss of people he loved and who in many ways, defined what he felt was the good in him. Being Paul's brother and Claudia's father were these parts of himself that he never felt ashamed of, he felt a sanctity in their need for, and understanding of him, something that allowed him a lightness he'd deny himself. That feeling of his love for them being something that killed them both is what he's ultimately grappling with, and understanding that their deaths were out of his control and not a reflection of the evil in him is really at the root of his arc.

In that sense, while Lestat's involvement and lack thereof is important narratively and for the audience's understanding of the character, I don't think it's actually that significant to his arc. Him not having wanted to be there doesn't absolve him, he'll always in part blame himself, just like Louis will, but that's not the tragedy of his story, just like it isn't the tragedy of Louis'. The tragedy is that he never let Claudia know him, and that whether through trauma, circumstance (again, interracial relationships and adoptions were illegal in Louisiana) or choice, he could never be father to her in the way that Louis could be. The thematic power in that arc as a result comes not from disentangling who was responsible for what at the trial, but in Lestat telling his story to a stranger now, when it saves nothing and no one, when he could never tell it to his daughter when maybe it could've saved her.

The trial wasn't an isolated incident, it was the culmination of a history he never let his husband or daughter know, and if Louis' role within the family is something he feels defines the best of himself, Lestat's forever left trying to define it at at all because his role within the family unit was beaten and starved out of shape in his boyhood, and as an adult, he's pushing himself into indentations he won't fit into.

To me, one of the questions Louis asks at the start of season 1 is: 'how could I love a man who killed our daughter?' And what the reunion scene to me had Lestat asking was: 'how can I grieve a daughter who I couldn't let be my daughter?'

Which, to me, with my writing hat on, leads ultimately to the question of 'would telling her any of this have saved her?'

Of course, I don't know what the framework might be for s3, but I feel like if the season is asking a question like that, then revisiting the trial earlier rather than later makes a lot of sense.

[kawouwu]

Sparse ep8 thoughts (covid fever dont take it too seriously)

devil's minion is like the least interesting thing this ep idk why ppl in the spoilers tag are losing their mind over it when LOUIS IS RIGHT THERE

i was worried last ep that i wouldn't be satisfied w the finale bc there was no way revenge could feel satisfactory after what was done to claudia, but i liked it??? it is satisfactory bc the final player, no, the main player in the entire plot against the 3 of them finally got his shit revealed and louis dumped his ass

But also lmao louis why did you leave a coughing baby alone in that penthouse with a hydrogen bomb? You tell him not to hurt daniel and you really think armand 514yo vampire who has lied to you and disrespected you wouldn't do it after you just dumped him?

Louis tore up that tree and replaced it with paul's portrait and claudia's dress is ;_; I'm glad he got it back. Seeing what they did to her desk made me mad; they couldn't have just cleared it out?

I know s3 is lestat's but i wanna know like. Wtf was up with your thought process armand. Anyways cheers to loustat getting back together and i hope they perpetually remarry and divorce forever as is their right

Louis's provocation of the vampires to come fight him is so........but I'm glad he's for once not in a bad toxic situation that's hurting him anymore ;_; I'm happy for him!!!! I really am

Daniel was almost killed then saved by a god whose name he forgot, and he came back and saved his god and i think thats so sweet

[tetsunabouquet]

Attack On Titan X Reader- Dutch Playlist Headcanon

A/N: Nothing To Lose was repeating in my brain and I couldn't help but think how the doomed, let's runaway theme fits Eren Yeager, and then my mind slowly started attributing Dutch pop songs to AOT men. I hope my AOT girlies can enjoy my picks!

Eren Yeager: Douwe Bob - Nothing To Lose This song is entirely sung in English so you don't need me explaining this one to you. The music video was actually shot in Japan.

Connie Springer: Fouradi - 1 Ding It means 1 Thing, and is about a guy with a somewhat player and clown-like image begging 'you' to be his: "One thing that I want from you, is that you stay by me and become my woman". The more playful lyrics in the rap verses really fit regular Connie and Slap On Titan's Connie both.

Jean Kirstein: Kim - Ik Ben Verliefd Means I Am In Love, this was a finalist song from the Dutch national contest of Junior Eurovision. It's a very mature ballad that fared better with adults then it did with the children watching and lyrics like, "In the silence rings your voice," just really remind me of the way Jean would look at Mikasa or in this instance, you as the listener imagening Jean feeling that way about you

Onyankopon : Re-Play - Kijk Om Je Heen Means Look Around You and it's about realizing you are not alone because there is a guy that loves you, "There is one who waits for you, all day and all night long." Because Re-Play is a pretty famous R&B group from the 90s, they were immediately who came to mind when thinking of this dude as he just fits that smooth R&B vibe.

Armin Arlert: Nielson - Beauty & the Brains Despite it's English title the song is in Dutch, if any of you watched TVD you might recognize this as the song playing during the Amsterdam scene. The title is pretty self-explanatory though and it is about simping for his girlfriend who's equally smart as she is beautiful and just an overall package deal. "I'm not so much of a hero myself, but I have my superwoman with me," is a lyric I can see Armin sing.

Reiner Braun: BLOF - Dansen Aan Zee Means Dancing At The Sea and this would totally fit Reiner falling for a girl on Paradis during his mission. It's about saying goodbye to the one he loves whilst he doesn't wants to and having one final dance on shore. "One for your tears, two for mine and three for the horizon to which we disappear". (tiny fact about me: I was actually classmates with the singer's nephew that had a crush on me in elemantary school)

Levi Ackerman: Claudia De Breij - Mag Ik Dan Bij Jou Means May I Go To You. It's about opening up and showing yourself at your most vulnerable state to a strong protector, the latter role is really befitting for Levi, I mean the song literally opens with "If there comes a war, and I'd need to hide, may I go to you?"

Bertolt Hoover: Paul De Leeuw - Ik Heb Je Lief Means I Hold You Dear. It's just a very sweet romantic song that I can picture Bertolt listening to whilst thinking of you. 'I hold you dear, what am I without you. They are four very small words, and they'll make you a little frightened. I hold you dear, a thousand and one nights long.'

Honorable mention for fluff's sake:

Falco Grice: Melle - Dromen Means 'Dreams'. This was a another finalist song from the Dutch national contest of Junior Eurovision. Not only does Melle have a Falco vibe, but it's a really adorable love song where Melle talks about his dreams of becoming a singer and sharing a life with his crush with whom he will always feel like the little boy he is now, no matter how old he gets. I can totally picture this as a shipping song for Falco and Gabi.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep1 Musings - Looking for Home: Louis, Claudia & Daciana

They flip between siblings and parent so much even I was getting whiplash--no wonder Lou's confused. U_U

This was EEEEEEEEVIIIIIIL, AMC! 😭 Louis carrying Grace's wedding portrait, and using it to FAKE his identity in Europe, after Grace couldn't even go to Europe for her own honeymoon cuz Paul died--STOP IT! 😭😭

And you can hear just a few quick seconds of the DPDL lietmotif that always plays for Grace, Paul, and sibling!Claudia, before it takes this SUPER dark and ominous tone--the song has been tainted, just like Lou's relationship with Grace and Claudia was tainted.

Go AWF, Claudia!

And then she finds ONE, and it was so heartbreakingly touching.

I was hoping she was Alessandra, but nope, she's an AMC!OC, Daciana. I'm assuming they were nodding to one rando revenant:

And she is obviously the same "Anna" the kids were singing about--(very Gaunter O'Dimm of them, I love it 💀)--living like frikkin Baba Yaga in a grimy castle in the woods.

Daciana killed her own fledgling after Claudia blinded him--after the revanant AND Daciana attacked them first, but whatever. Cuz she said he wouldn't be able to hunt/feed with no eyes--so it can't heal; her fledglings are too effed up. She's officially the last one in the area.

And I get it now--the bear(?) head Claudia breaks off of the dead vampire's sarcophagus was a heraldric figurehead. Claudia showed it to Daciana, as a way of asking her who that dead vamp was.

She didn't want to tell them her story or hear theirs--but she wanted them to know about Cezare Romulo (RIP). (It's crazy how in 5 minutes The Vampire Daciana was way more effective than a whole hour of Dierdre Mayfair. 🙄😒) She complimented Claudia's blood, saying it tasted like the cream of the crop. Daciana only told them her name, and that she was waiting for her children--fledglings or real ones, who knows (I bet both).

Only for Daciana to kill herself right in front of them (RIP). 😔🔥

This is so sad, but it was obvious she was gonna do that.

Stop teasing the Children of Darkness after this Alessandra fake-out. She's got the same darkness in her that Nicki (AND Louis) had. And we know where that means. 🔥💀🔥

These vampires are STARVING--hungry for family, love, home: LIFE.

So is Claudia! 😭😭😭 She wants a blood spouse! She wants a companion!

So I LOVE that Morgan clocked Louis on Grace's photo--that ain't yo wife! The gaydar was beeping the second your pretty arse walked in!

Like, it's been established that Louis is a terrible liar-you don't need an investigative journalist to figure that much out. Louis is TOO honest--he was dumb AF for telling Morgan his real name! I get why he did it in the book--again: desperate to make a connection.

But on the show it comes across way different--Louis almost immediately tells Morgan his name (he doesn't do that for Emilia, even though SHE called him pretty! Istg I was picking up some flirtatiousness with Lou & Morgan; put those pheromones AWAY 😂). But you come across MIGHTY SUS if your Black arse is going around switching identities on all these twitchy Europeans, Louis!

Like baaaaaasicallllllyyyyyyy!!! 🤦 You see them shooting up corpses just to make sure--you think they won't shoot YOU!?!

Anyways, it's so cool that they made Morgan a photographer--so is THIS why Louis starts taking photos!? 🤩📸

Cuz I've been wondering how Louis makes money in Paris so they don't have to pickpocket anymore?

I love that they included this.

No matter where they go, they have to pose as Black servants and maids and VALETS and SLAVES, white folk are the same regardless of the country.

Which was an interesting parallel with Daciana, and how much they were hyping up America.

She was clearly nuts, but smart & sane enough to realize that 2 (two!) Black vampires had fled their oh-so-great "land of the free" to come to HER busted AF blown up war-torn country, so why should she expect to have any happiness over there?

I don't know a lick of Romanian, but I wonder if the "another one" she was referring to was the soldier, or the country. As Daciana realized that no matter who she made her new fledgling, and no matter which country she ran to, she'd be alone & unhappy without the people she loved--her HOME.

Home is where the HEART is! Claudia's been homeless this whole time! Daciana's got that huge castle, but lives all alone--she can't make proper fledglings. Meanwhile Louis still thinks NOLA is home, even after they killed everyone who knew them--"including" Lestat!

*sigh* I hate this effing show, it's so dang good. 😭

[murfpersonalblog]

I'm piggybacking offa @lynnenne in the tags

cuz saaaaame~! I like it, too.

Armand hadn't found the person he's willing to risk it all for yet.

People get so hung up on the romantic relationships, and miss the whole point of the platonic relationships. AR was writing these books to express her unconditional love for her DAUGHTER.

Vampire bonds--especially Maker/Fledgling bonds, are about FAMILY; from Amel on down.

But TVC's all about these effed up families, where blood is NOT thicker than water, and your own blood can let you down and even hate you; and the love of your life can kill you; and you and your Maker/Fledging can't even communicate (telepathically) with you anymore once that literal wall rises between your minds. (When pressed, AR had interesting things to say about her parents, AND her husband Stan; her inspo for Lestat.)

The strongest bond in the entire TVC is between Louis and his daughter Claudia. She wasn't actually his blood at all, but he felt more for her than ANYONE--his Maker (blood-father) Lestat and his Fledgling (blood-daughter) Madeleine combined. He could TALK to Claudia--his favorite thing to do; what he'd been missing ever since Paul died, and Miss Lily. He only gets a mere fraction of that back in SanFran, and again when he pays Daniel 10 million dollars to "sit in a room and talk to you." It's better when Grampire Oldmaniel becomes "something like an annoying little brother," as JA called him.

Someone he can talk to (telepathically) over miles, and who knows how he thinks & speaks & who can be 100% blunt & honest with him.

Claudia: We're a family? Louis: Yeah. But with no secrets.

And I think this show is primed to give Armand a similar treatment, as he too finally discovers what unconditional love means.

But I don't even think it'll be with his Fledgling Daniel, or even his Maker Marius.

I think/HOPE it'll be the bond Armand forms with Benji & Sybelle.

When they first met him, Benji called him a dybbuk (a demon), but they weren't afraid of him--they saw that he'd been burned alive and was in pain, so they HELPED/SAVED him. They brought him food & shelter, and nursed him back to health, when he could've killed them both. They stayed with him through thick & thin. And he helped them right back; getting Benji off the streets, and Sybelle away from her abusers; giving her a safe space to express herself (cuz she's clearly on the spectrum).

Marius turned them FOR Armand, explicitly to give him companions he could TALK to (telepathically); who knew & understood him, and most importantly: loved him unconditionally. The wall would never go up b/t them, like it had gone up b/t Marius & Armand, or b/t Armand & Daniel (who was mentally ill for a while after he Turned, and HATED being around Armand until he got better).

Marius' love for Armand was conditional: he left Armand with the Children of Satan cuz he was disappointed in him. And Daniel's love of Armand was traumatic & transactional from the very beginning; and took a massive blow as soon as Daniel turned; which required god knows how long to heal.

It's the same way Marius turned Viktor for Lestat, so they could always communicate (telepathically); and be completely open with each other, without the curse of the Masker/Fledgling bond getting in the way as it had with Les and everyone else he loved but couldn't 100% trust to not "abandon" him. Viktor was Les' blood SON; but he'd finally have family he could be 100% open with; without THE Blood Bond getting in the way & inevitably screwing things up.

Armand freaked TF out when Benji & Sybelle were turned, but eventually grew to appreciate just how precious the gift Marius gave him really was ("I didn't know it was a gift"); having not just one but TWO companions he COULD depend on to love him for 200+ years; without any resentment or white noise from being their Maker.

I'm really looking forward to that; for me that was the highlight of TVA; Armand finally getting a real family.

Rolin's interviews are even more confusing like wdym he really couldn't prevent it?

everything he's said is how i interpreted the show as well but i get the confusion. when he says i could not prevent it it's not in the sense that armand couldn't have overpowered the coven in response to their threats like he says in 2x06

he might've killed them or they might've kill him if it came down to a direct confrontation but he wasn't emotionally or intellectually ready to destroy the thing that gave his life meaning for 200 years. that's how i took the "i could not prevent it". rolin also said armand's first act of cowardice is in this moment not simply running away with louis because choosing louis over the coven means taking a huge risk w/ his heart. as he later says he couldn't count on louis's love lasting 200 years and he's not even wrong. even if he's the love of your life, it could all blow up in your face next week or next month. like loustat barely lasted 30 years after all and the final 20 of those years were held together by ducktape and claudia. it all ended in lestat's murder. that's the risk you take when it comes to love.

so the "acts of cowardice" aren't necessarily about armand being afraid for himself physically but rather his dependence on structure and rules to define his life.

here are the direct quotes referenced:

i found it a very interesting choice for the character, although definitely a part of me thinks this change from the books was to ensure armand didn't encroach on lestat's oeuvre of being the guy who puts everything on the line for love/louis. like lestat's whole deal is even if it all blew up and louis killed him every 10 years he would still always choose to have louis than not. armand isn't able to take that risk (yet) but if you take rolin's assurances this is all building to something in 9 seasons lol

[tiny-murder-daughter]

My thoughts about the amc show:

Pros:

They will explicitly show the romantic relationship between Louis and Lestat. (Though I suspect they'll pull the same homophobic shit the movie did and have Louis fuck with women as well, cause god forbid we'll get a character that's exclusively same sex attracted. I don't trust people who go to such efforts to showcase prostitution in their show.)

Louis is not a plantation owner.

Cons:

Instead of being a plantation owner Louis is now a pimp, so he still owns slaves but now it's only female sex slaves. But I guess that's ok cause sex trafficking is empowering and women aren't people🙄

Daniel is old as fuck. I don't think I need to elaborate on this one.

Claudia's actress is too old and too tall. The whole point and the horror of Claudia's character is that she is stuck as a child forever. I'm sure that Bailey will do a great job with what she is given but she is soon turning 20 (born on 18.06.2003 afaik) and is quite tall at 5'8 = 173cm which is way taller then the actress playing Louis' sister Kalyne who is only 5'2 = 157cm or 5'1 = 154 according to different sources. Bailey will not look like a child and that will ruin Claudia's character as she was written in the book. Also I don't trust them to not sexualize her because as I said I don't trust people who go to such efforts to showcase prostitution in their show.

The writers clearly don't give a fuck about Louis' character. They couldn't even get his name right on their official website🤦🏼‍♀️ not to mention what they are intending to do with his personality.

They did not even cast Paul (at least according to imdb). Sure he dies in the beginning but is death is really important. Where is he?

The time period shift. Instead of beautiful period costumes like in the movie we get ugly and boring early modern suits and ugly ass hets.

In conclusion:

I really wanted to have hope for this show but from the moment I read they are going to make Louis a pimp that hope started to disappear, and lessened with every bit of new information. Now I just hope this show will fail miserably and I won't have to hear about it anymore.

I will not be watching the show. Maybe I'll watch a youtube compilation of the best loustat moments or something but I'm not wasting any time on a show that clearly doesn't respect or care about the source material.

[beautyindiversity]

Why is this the first thing I thought about this morning?

Ok ok ok (ok,ladies now let's get in formation) but no seriously. I've seen people be like "what happened in the fight when we couldn't see?!" and like framing the question to mean "Louis was probably fighting him back" but in a negative way. And like.... y'all are so weird for acting like if Louis DID get a few hits in he was wrong. I have two points.

Louis has never been shown to be non-violent. He literally stabbed Lestat in the back before he turned him. Like....what? So I'm SURE with all the cheating,and yelling and criticism he had been dealing with from Lestat he had been wanting to (attempt to) beat Lestat's ass. Lestat choking Claudia was his last straw. And before y'all bring up "he choked Claudia before" although it's not right in either case,there was a clear difference in levels between him holding her against the closet and him running at her full speed and choking her. AND this is before it was "confirmed" that Lestat had nothing to do with Paul's death so THAT was always in the back of his mind.

At ANY time if Lestat didn't really want to fight him he could've hemmed him up! You cannot convince me that Louis was sooo much stronger than Lestat that he couldn't have been stopped WITHOUT beating the hell out of him. Lestat wanted to beat his ass too! He said he'd been fighting his nature! We know he didn't mean that about the killing and whoring! He said "my daddy beat me and I've been trying not to beat you" girl!

So stop acting like if Louis did get a few hits in he was wrong,ok thank you 😄

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV Ep4 - Rewind the Tape

"How does Claudia joining Lestat and Louis’ family affect or change them, separately and also as a couple?"

@iwtvfanevents

IMO, Lestat saved Louis' life, but Claudia gave Louis a reason to go on living. Cuz unfortunately for Lou, he thinks his value came strictly from external sources; the value other people put on him & judged him by--his career & socio-economic status; his worth as a Black man (a product of slavery and the literal value/prices put on Black bodies; how his role/actions affected "my people"); his orientation ("identifying as a homosexual," "embracing my sexuality"); and his place/dynamic within the nuclear family unit (at the DPDL estate, and at 1132 Rue Royale).

By Ep3, Louis had lost everything--out of business when Storyville was shut down; thoroughly disrespected by white racists at every turn, from Ordinance 4118's segregation bill & Finn O'Shea "a white man who used to work for me" burning down the Azalea after stealing his money to open his own "No Coloreds Allowed" competitor, to Tom & the Alderman screwing him over ("a dumb pimp who got robbed blind years ago"); his white husband cheating on him with a white woman that used to work for him & laughing in his face about it; and Lou dumping Les during the race riots on the night Lestat wanted to make "our anniversary."

But ironically, Les had a point about making that night their "anniversary:" a night of change, evolution, transformation & rebirth for ALL of them--most obviously for Claudia, the baby phoenix vampire rising from Storyville's ashes, but for Loustat too.

IWTV focuses on how Louis was affected & changed by gaining Claudia, first as a daughter & then as a "sister." She became his central axis--everything revolved around her. Louis had discovered what unconditional love truly meant.

That was something Lou'd NEVER experienced before. Everyone's love for him came with conditions, clauses, terms of service--from Grace's conservative judgementalism, to Paul's dogmatic religiosity, to his p.o.s. mother's resentment, hate & homophobia. The affection b/t Lou & Lily was a transaction bought & paid for. And where to even start with Monsieur "Without Apology" de Lioncourt. 😒 And in turn, Louis' love was tainted--he lost touch with Grace, he was blamed for Paul's suicide (and likely blamed himself sometimes), his relationship with his mother had been ruined LONG before he became a vampire, and Lestat...jfc.

But in Claudia, Louis could finally pour all of his love & attention & affection on someone who could love him back, tabula rasa, a newborn vamp who just wanted food, home, comfort, safety & love from him, with all a child's demanding.

Sadly, Claudia did NOT love Louis unconditionally. By the end, she genuinely hated him (and ofc Lestat), for all the ways he'd "dragged his family into this mess" (especially in Paris), and hopelessly "failed" her, and chose other men over her (regardless of whether or not he really DID, that was how SHE FELT). Lou'd learn the hard way in Merrick that NOTHING he'd given her had been enough.

As horrific as it was, Merrick was the best thing for Lou; forcing himself to face Claudia's ghost, her diaries, and her true feelings about him. In the end, he had to learn that loving people (and being loved) couldn't be a crutch, or his reason to keep living or not.

Lou'd HATED himself his entire life, deeply depressed & full of "self-loathing;" and after losing Claudia he couldn't pretend to be happy anymore (even w/ Armand, despite how long they stayed together).

Same goes for Lestat. For all his vain cocksure braggadocio, Lestat hated himself too. (Despite claiming he didn't in ToTBT.)

Lestat thought his value came from what he could provide/give/do for others--the gentle son who stayed by his mother Gabrielle when the Marquis & his horrid brothers abused them; the Wolfkiller who saved the town & hunted food for his family; the gallant hero/lover who rescued the damsel in distress & whisked them away on a whirlwind adventure/romance (Gabrielle, Nicki, Louis, etc). Whatever people wanted, he'd give them, lovebomber supreme.

This ultimately culminated in his role as the vampire Maker, the god of his own Savage Garden, creating the world through his image of what he felt the world was/should be like (a la the Chateau Era).

Cuz he suffered from chronic abandonment issues--everyone he'd loved most had betrayed him & left him--first & foremost God.

So it all snowballed from Lestat's own traumatic childhood, trying to find God (freedom, food, home, comfort, safety & love) but being dragged back into Hell over & over (LITERALLY in Memnoch).

And trying to connect with his fledglings & being abandoned over & over, as vampirism had turned Lestat into a monster/the Devil.

Claudia effed up Les' God Complex, but he needed that humbling. He needed to take accountability for all the things he'd done wrong, and the ways he'd failed as her Maker/Creator/Father. Cuz we know Les loved her deeply in the books--he just didn't know HOW to love.

Together, I think Loustat was most affected/changed by having Claudia in the way they were able to come back together and rekindle their love for e/o through loving Claudia--she really was an effective bandaid gluing them together, when Lou would've left Les in Ep3.

Claudia was an outlet for Loustat: she gave Louis someone he felt he could "do right" by (after he'd failed Grace & the kids), and she gave Lestat someone he could bond with as a sadistic vampire killer.

So yeah, Loustat (mostly Louis) did the best he could by Claudia, but we see where the road to Hell is paved with good intentions.

Ultimately, in the books, Loustat is only able to come together to "do right" by another daughter when they take in Rose; making up for the mistakes they made with Claudia. (But even there, we see the ways Rose still suffered from loneliness/abandonment, especially when Lestat over-corrected by giving her more freedom & autonomy by being more hands-off & distant, instead of overbearing & controlling.)