#instatements

[nenestansunsthings]

having svsss au ideas beyond my station

thinking. shang qinghua goes on a mission as a young disciple to some town in fuckoff nowhere and finds himself in the qiu household. and there he finds a young shen jiu, undergoing the plot he originally intended for him and hadn't realised had become real and he's so young oh god hes so young why is he so small what do you mean that part was real, he hadn't kept it why is it real—

and he panics and sneaks him the Fuck out of that house

and he's not sure what to do but surely sending him to cang qiong will fuck up something in the plot and he can't come under even more investigation and cang qiong tryouts dont happen for months anyway and his system would probably never allow it (it doesnt. it would interfere with yue qingyuans story) but shen jiu is refusing to stay anywhere near this place and wants to learn cultivating to protect himself make sure nothing like this ever happens again and sqh panics harder and

calls mobei jun.

okay. on second thought, maybe this was a bad idea. but he stumbles over himself and shushes baby shen jiu's very understandable freaking out and asks his king for the first thing hes ever asked for other than his own life.

is there any way this human child could learn cultivation in the demon world?

[zvaigzdelasas]

One unforeseen consequence of the male loneliness epidemic

[helpimsleepdeprived]

in honour of national emo day

[buttercatrho]

Buggy! based on this image by @/mcapriglioneart on twitter

[starry-bi-sky]

pouring one out for luo binghe in my disciple SQQ fic, poor guy has taken a backseat here. we're nearly 30k words deep and he hasn't even shown his face once. it'll be much longer before he even actually talks to Shen Qingqiu.

(i say im pouring one out but in reality im sitting in my director's chair chewing on a cigar and wearing a beret as he tearily and unsuccessfully pleads with me for more scenes with Shen Qingqiu)

[elizabethrobertajones]

nearly back to the beginning... just finished the original run of Doctor Who :')

[geistverrse]

Anymore Sivva or has Hunter the Parenting consumed your free time?

[incorrecttowerofgodquotes]

World’s best worst polycule: Bam, Khun, Wangnan, and Ehwa

Two dumbasses, one eldritch being, and the sole brain cell holder, but he has daddy issues

[jakekazansky]

Ron and Merlin trying to parent teenage Jake and nothing works. Taking things away does nothing cause Jake is used to having nothing. Grounding him doesn’t really work cause it’s not like Jake has any real friends and the only place he goes is the academy and he has to go with Merlin (he’s 17 and the government fears if they let him live in the dorms that he’ll disappear so thus he has to live with slider and Merlin at their home his first year).

Not entirely sure on how they figure it out but they find out the only real thing Jake responds to is air jail.

Yes, air jail. Like you would do with cats.

Jake is like 5’6”-5’7” meanwhile slider and Merlin are both over 6 foot.

So Ron just wandering through and snatching Jake up when Jake’s trying to start shit with the son of an admiral whose family is over for a dinner. And Ron being just like ‘nope we’re not doing this’ cause Jake has started fist fights with other people this way. So Ron just acts like he’s walking by and swoops him up and under his arm like a football. And it momentarily stuns him like when you put a towel over a cat.

So Ron just walking out into the backyard with Jake trying to wriggle out of Ron’s hold before he eventually just gives up and just hangs there.

Jake is well behaved the rest of the night.

Merlin days later asking Ron how he got Jake to behave that night and Ron just showing him a video of someone doing air jail to a cat and being like “this, air jail. He’s basically a cat so this”.

[corallapis]

like do i think that the master's house was respectable and the master's criminality was an embarrassment to them? yes.* but the text never says that abt oakdown specifically. please we must look at the text.

[loveletterworm]

commissions for @microwave-kid of beloved characters Infinite from Sonic Forces and Keith from Shadow the Hedgehog (2005). This post is not sponsored or endorsed by Arby's Restaurant Group jenny just wanted me to draw arby's

[amrv-5]

hawkeye poll be real…….

[katzirrart]

My girlfriend made jokes about Avenger's cookie cutters, and lightning bolts which I found hilarious... and then I was like man, Loki would make ugly but tasty cookies for his first tries LOL...

They just expand too much because the dough got funny njfgkh

The joke of Loki being challenged to learn to cook without magic, but not directly being challenged is hilarious to me...

[mimiyanna]

I’m never buying vtuber merch again jesus fucking christ

[thelingering]

in light of my birthday coming up soon, and in confirmation of the rumours whispered in other people's posts, it indeed appears I've reached total enlightenment and desire no physical objects

[front-facing-pokemon]