#is this a cold call

[shanklin]

Sentient Mystery Shack, who is really biased towards Stan, so when Ford tells Stan he has to give it back after the summer it’s on sight.

Ford keeps tripping over nothing, nothing is where it's supposed to be and somehow he keeps running into closets when he tries to go outside.

But the worst part, the WORST part is that Ford's lightbulb just won't. Work. No matter what he does it keeps flickering and exploding.

Ford is spiraling. 

There is no reason why it shoudln’t work. All his trial runs work perfectly. He’s already checked the Shacks wiring three times and relearned this dimensions science from the ground up. 

Nothing works.

The Rift? Bill? The impending apocalypse? Eating? Sleep? Who cares about that. 

WHY. WONT. THE. LIGHTBULB. WORK???

It doesn’t help that Stan keeps laughing at him.

“Then you do it!” Ford eventually snaps at Stan.

Stan shrugs and with a little song under his breath screws his own lightbulb in. It works perfectly.

Stanford screams.

[j0hnpr1c3sm1ssus]

Alpha!Kortac with a new recruit!Reader who's being courted (or attempted to be) by every alpha on base.

All of them try to show off with their various positive attributes, winning fights, showing off conquests, etc.

But then there's König. König takes the time to really truly learn Reader. He learns what reader likes, their favourite scents, fabrics they like, music, everything. He learns it all.

So when heat season comes? On reader's doorstep there's about 20 different scent items, labelled from various alphas.

They're all big blankets, or hoodies, all theirs.

But then there's König's. He brought a box.

It's shirts, all your favourite colours and fabrics, some freshly bought, others from his collection. In the bottom is a fluffy blanket, it's comfortable looking, too. It has a note on it, which reads "Saw this in the autumn and it reminded me of you. I've been making sure to scent it frequently for you." With a little crown doodle. It's from König.

It's not a massive surprise to him whenever he sees you on his doorstep, trying to tug him to your nest, thick with heat smell.

[zorangezest]

thanks for listening

[keferon]

I find it so so funny how people just keep tagging me under Prowl related posts. You all collectively assumed I lost my mind over this guy and you are absolutely right hahaha

[merchantservices444]

What is the Difference Between a Vendor and a Merchant?

[mellosdrawings]

Bell, after having their brain toyed with so much they can't even remember the concept of gender anymore.

Giving you the opportunity to make your character NB when they've been canonically brainwashed into becoming a whole other person might be the funniest thing the COD franchise has ever done. I'm eating it up so much.

[sunburstsandmoonshadows]

ok but i've heard that WAX STAN 3: THE THREEQUEL: THIS TIME IT'S IMPERSONAL is the best out of the franchise

[lunarw0rks]

john “big stretch” price

simon “make it fit” riley

soap “just the tip” mactavish

kyle “give me one more” garrick

[allallallstone]

[suntails]

winter

[septic-salad]

Eyes Without A Face

[j0hnpr1c3sm1ssus]

Imagine Johnny coming back from deployment and he goes to open 'er (your legs) up and then all you see is horror on his face.

You shaved. That's it. No period, nothing scary down there. But to him?

Guys he's fucking BAWLING. I think if this was his first time since coming back from deployment he'd lose his shit AND ACTUALLY CRY.

"bonnie... Ye shaved 'er bald," he says, having to keep from crying, "what'll keep 'er warm in the winter?"

[technically-human]

We're drawing the idiots with traditional clothing from our countries? hell yeah, here's stobotnik as Argentinian gauchos!

Plus a very normal and not at all unhinged rant about mate (the thing they're drinking) in the tags.

[yanderestarangel]

𝗔𝗗𝗟𝗘𝗥 𝗥𝗨𝗦𝗦𝗘𝗟𝗟 – 𝗕𝗢6

𝗕𝗢𝗡𝗨𝗦: THIS LINE...

I need this tired, traumatized old man's cock down my throat.

[verynordiclars]

this was probably how the whole break on through level went for bell

[roryfrommybabysittersavampire]

I think one of my favorite little details about spike's character is how he treated drusilla. he wasn't just "patient" with her disability, he actively treated it as just another thing about her to love. he verry rarely coddled her or tried to get her to be more present in a situation when she wasn't capable. (I can't think of a single time that he did but i feel like there were some when he was already upset at other people?). he learned to understand what she was saying even when it sounded like nonsense. when she was upset he comforted her, no matter how often it happened. when she started dancing he danced with her.

and we see in buffy 5x20 that it wasn't just his love for dru that made him act like that. when tara was incoherent and opened the window in the van, he didn't just immediately forgive her for burning him, he never got upset in the first place. he yelled, of course, because he was hurt, but as soon as willow started apologizing and trying to explain he just nodded. because it's no biggie! he already understands. some people are just like that, and he doesn't see accommodating that as the big deal that the people around him are making it out to be.