#it's been 1 day and i already feel the brainrot consuming me

[n30nkn1ght]

i'm sorry i can already imagine the magnus protocol fics in the future. somehow time travel happens and the new crew meets jon & martin. you're kidding. imagine how they'd lose their minds finding out their silly little text-to-speech programs are in love. imagine how sad alice would be discovering their names aren't actually norris and chester. imagine jon and martin taking one look at gwen bouchard and noping outta there. god. i just know the time travel fics are gonna be so silly. and i just know i'm gonna eat them UP. martin would be so unimpressed by their statement classifications but i think jon would love them. he's the typa guy who would happily complicate that stuff

[koukaaa-descent]

sits politely in your inbox. saw your post about jester lifecycles and wanted to ask if you have ideas for masked lifecycles. to me the dramatic masks you find as scrap used to be maskeds before, the hosts bodies simply ran out of "juice" and weren't useful anymore so the mask dropped off (the remaining corpse is scavenged by other creatures).

okay long post time!! I’m glad people like what I drag from my brain. (This is very long)

This post will cover topics such as; decay, insects (not in detail) and body horror. If you’re sensitive to things like that, I recommend looking the other way. Otherwise, enjoy however many words of my brainrot! :]

I like to think that the Masks themselves were made rather than born, albeit still organic. I’ve always been a fan of horrifying grotesque body horror scenarios. (User Pangolin-404 and their masked having webs of nerves that root inside of a host’s body, which is so fucking cool by the way, reminded me of this. I realize after writing this whole thing that my brain likes that more than expected.)

Honestly.,, I have a feeling that the masks themselves have been around for a very very long time, and new ones only ever appear when someone unfortunate is converted. There was a war (ingame lore!) roughly 500 years ago which may or may not have facilitated their creation.

In my eyes, Comedy masks are the ones that’ve naturally spawned (I.e, already with a host or otherwise lying on the ground.) I like to believe that the comedy masks are the ‘first’ of the masks to exist, which have been around since the beginning. The ‘first generation’, per se.

I also like to think that the Tragedy masks are made when someone is converted. They’re basically the supposed ‘second’ generation of masks. It goes like this; comedy masked converts someone, they become a tragedy masked. That tragedy masked converts someone else, and then, well... thus begins a cycle. (Ex. Comedy gen 1>Tragedy>TragedyG1>TragedyG2> etc etc..)

There are a relatively smaller amount of Comedy masked as a result of this, but their quantity is still very much immense. (Ex. For every 10 Tragedies, there is 7 Comedies). The reason for this is that, despite how well they can trick and capture prey, they are still oftentimes rotting and weakened from extended periods of isolation without access to new hosts. There is henceforth a greater number of Masks than there is the Masked. Comedy Masks tend to have a greater lifespan with their hosts, as they are very, very experienced and have gathered a significantly larger amount of knowledge. (They are still not entirely sentient, no matter how deeply convincing it may be. They have a measure of sentience, but not enough. This only ever occurs within Comedy Masks.)

I doubt that they ever actually die unless the mask itself is utterly destroyed, shattered or rendered otherwise unusable.

After this point is where more visceral topics are covered. However; with a host, that specific lifetime is pretty simple, I think. In the beginning, the corpse is fresh, probably still warm (and kept warm by presumably boiling blood) and likely behaves the same as any other human body. Even has a heartbeat and continues to breathe. Vocalizing is possible although usually incomprehensible (typically just a weird slurry of sounds). Finer control is possible, down to curling its toes or flexing individual muscles, along with blinking, moving its tongue, or focusing and unfocusing its eyes. (Please note; a majority of those features tend to be entirely lost during possession, either melted from the host’s body or simply consumed during the process of conversion.)

After a day or so, natural body functions begin to slowly and steadily cease as, despite the Mask’s support, the body has finally lost enough of its own blood and thus slowly shuts down. The Mask’s replacement blood—the substance rendered eternally boiling—is not a suitable replacement despite its apparent compatibility with regular humanoid blood regardless of the type. It carries too little oxygen and remains too thick to move properly through the veins without its host’s own biological assistance. Rigor mortis sets in to the majority of the body by the end of the second day, and the mask has to relearn how to use the body as it has new limitations and requires different efforts in order to move as it used to. Movements become clumsier (not just from the disorientation of change) and the fine control it once had is now unable to be achieved again without outside assistance. Vocalizations are now completely incomprehensible as the entity can no longer fine-tune the required muscles in order to produce the vaguest notion of words. (Not that it was able to speak beforehand.)

The body remains this way for about a week total before further decay begins to set in. The nature of the planet that the host was on beforehand does matter; if it was on Offense during this phase, it would proceed much faster in comparison to Dine or Rend. Temperature affects decay times. Masked typically tend to avoid hotter areas for this reason during this period of its host’s ‘lifetime’ (if it cares for or understands what is happening.)

By the third phase of its ‘lifetime’, the body begins to rot. Fortunately, no insects or decomposers infest the body; the natural heat that the Masked’s blood produces keeps anything untoward away, up to and including foreign materials, unwanted substances and undesirable parasites. Most biological poisons have no effect on Masked in general, typically being denatured on contact with its blood. Artificial poisons, venoms and other toxic substances do occasionally effect a Masked, although usually only in the region that it first made contact in. They do not have very good blood circulation.

The skin of the host cools down rather than remaining at the warm temperature it previously had, which is likely an instinctive response from the Masked as it senses the decay. By this point, points that usually chafe or experience too much friction begin to slowly rub away from the flesh and bone, scraping skin and viscera away with it. The Masked does not experience pain, only discomfort.

At the very end of its current lifetime, true rot begins. If the host is using an entirely sealed suit, blood begins to fill the inside. The corpse begins to slowly, steadily, achingly liquify. At one point it will start to drip from the helmet’s filters, pushed outward with every movement. The Masked can no longer run, as doing so will simply worsen its condition. It is now at risk of abandoning its host and awaiting the next.

If its current host is wearing an unsealed suit, flesh simply sloughs off and out of it as the body weakens. During this state, the Masked first feels pain. (It does not recognize the feeling, and does not usually react. There are cases wherein first or second generation Tragedy masks attempt to cry or otherwise vocalize with screams, keens, gasps or sobs, further obliterating their remaining throat. The third generations and those afterward display no such behaviors, however.)

At the very end of its host’s lifetime (where it is left as merely bone, softened flesh and tendon), the Mask finds a very quiet place. Oddly enough, they seek out small and warm areas, usually dry in nature. It is not uncommon for a Masked to give itself to a member of its Masquerade (a term used for groups of Masked, taken from another researcher (Pangolin-404!)) or to another entity that it has taken a liking to. Albeit, this ‘fondness’ is based upon the creature’s unwillingness to kill it, and its own lack of desire to kill the creature. Several cases have been documented wherein Masked have given themselves to a varying assortment of creatures; other Masked, Hoarding Bugs, Spore Lizards, Nutcrackers (which is a very peculiar interaction), Jesters (thought to be out of malice, seeing as Masks can devour a grown Jester if it is attached for a length of time), Coil-heads (incredibly strange), and Brackens, who occasionally partake in attaching the Masks to their bodies in return for the Mask’s boiling blood, forming a symbiotic relationship with as many as three at a time.

In the process of placing itself somewhere or giving itself to another entity, the Masked takes itself off of its host. The body remains beneath its control for a very short amount of time afterward, as its disconnected span of vein-like ‘roots’ within the body act upon its last commands. Shortly afterward, the body collapses and becomes entirely harmless, likely having placed the Mask somewhere, or having handed it to another entity.

After that, the Mask returns to dormancy, awaiting a host. (I imagine that they place themselves in a warm area as to facilitate “good dreams”. I suppose that staying in a cold, lonely place would be rather unfortunate when one is in a state of dormancy, unable to wake and move by one’s own terms. This is just a theory, however.)

Notes; 1 Masks are typically made out of a material similar to bone. Comedy Masks resemble porcelain, retaining a certain shine rather than the dull white that most Tragedy masks have. 2 Masked tend to place their Masks nearby fireplaces or Hoarder Bug hives at the end of their host’s lifetime, as they both retain a great amount of heat. 3 It is thought that the symbiotic relationship that a Mask can create with a Bracken is entirely beneficial to both parties—hence symbiosis. The Mask typically partakes in any form of possession with parasitism, and it is unknown if it chooses to leave the Bracken’s bodily functions alone because of an inability to control it or because of its supposed lack of desire to do so.

Thankyou for reading ,,, my brain likes to rattle around a lot and. I am entirely normal about the masks and I can be trusted to speak a normal amount about them. I’m like 12% sure I answered your question

[johnslittlespoon]

https://www.tumblr.com/hogans-heroes/746685005077544960/the-most-powerful-one-so-far-im-crying

Have you seen this buckbucky edit yet?

BIG OL' MISCELLANEOUS ASK POST!!

1) UNFORTUNATELY (said with love). that edit made me cry like a mf, my soul is too soft for those two to stay dry eyed through stuff like that. but god it was BEAUTIFUL.

2) ohh 100000%. it's in my post–war buckbucky playlist, it fits john's pov so well. it's so angsty, working through mental health issues in the aftermath, learning how to communicate with gale and ask for help when he needs it, just wanting to be by his side 24/7 but feeling undeserving of his love and also being afraid of how much he loves him and how much gale loves him back </3

3) omg no don't be sorry!! i am someone who listens to a little bit of everythinggg don't sweat it. i gave it a listen and YOWCH that hurt wtf?? it does fit bucky in that time so well, our poor sweet boy. :( also i still feel so bad that my only curtbucky fic is an mcd angst one LOL i need to fix that soon <3

4) another one i hadn't heard but nooo it absolutely is. all the angsty pine–y songs fit him so perfectly </3 he just wants to feel someone love him the same way he loves!! but also: 'i know i should be angry, but i can barely feel a fucking thing' is very plane–wing–scene :(

5) NO. NOT FUN. i have such a hard time listening to that song as is but thinking about it with post–war john in mind has literally made it 10x more painful and now this edit 😭 i tried to make an angsty edit to it a few weeks back but i started crying every time LOL phoebe just hurts too damn bad when you pair her with mota stuff. i adore her <3

6) SGDKJG honestly a wild day for us. she cracks me up like no one else <33 but OOO okay so i'm a strange one alright i grew up adoring anything fantasy/sci–fi, ate every novel and movie and show up, but in the past few years i've sort of lost interest in that vibe? which makes me really sad! but i've just been enjoying more slice of life stuff in terms of media i consume.

so i think if dune had come out when i was in like high school, i would've been obsessed, but even if it's not my go to genre, i still thought they were beautiful movies, perfect casts, managed to hold my attention as someone who can barely sit thru movies 99% of the time, the sound design was incredible, 10/10. no complaints.

but listen.... at first i was like "yummy feyd" as a joke. i serious'd very very fast. like i knew i'd be attracted just bc, i mean, c'mon, it's austin lmfaooo, but my brain chemistry was genuinely altered. i haven't like properly fleshed out any au–type of brainrot because i honestly didn't retain enough info about the dune universe (again. i am not a good movie watcher, i do not do well just sitting down and paying attention to one thing for three hours lol) but i do think some sort of crossover where john is in the dune world would be interesting!

let's be real, most of us would probably just wanna see john and feyd fuck nasty so. not sure it needs much elaborating on LMFAO and i'd be surprised if someone doesn't end up writing a fic like that– wouldn't be surprised if there already are some!

[dahldahlbills]

juggling three different writing projects in my head rn i feel like im going insane

[damagedintellect]

Dazai Osamu x reader

💌 Reading into the palms of isekai bullshit: 

Chapter 1  💌  

Summary:   You were no stranger to isekai bullshit. It’s not like you had a problem with it. The genre took over the anime scene for years now but you try to stay away from thinking about how you would handle the situation. The last time you thought about inserting yourself into your favorite show you wrote a 100k word xReader fic for your favorite characters and you didn’t want to spend all your time consumed by the brainrot again. Never again, you promised yourself that was the last time you’d let the devil on your shoulder win. You clicked on chapter 1 to start the adventure over again but when you opened your eyes and saw Dazai O-FUCKING-samu getting choked by Kunikida you honestly hoped it was a dream.

Notes: Another isekai so I can play around with BSD like dolls.

💌 Word count: 3,312 💌  You Are Here | Next Chapter =>

"Nooooooo!” you screamed, throwing your phone down. Today was the day the new Bungo Stray Dogs chapter was supposed to be posted. It was but you weren’t happy about it. You finished reading it in record speed since they left both of your favorite characters in a pretty heavy cliffhanger only to shift the perspective to someone else. It wasn’t a bad chapter, you just didn’t like the idea that you’d now have to wait another month. You sighed falling back on to your bed. The waiting was nothing new but your brain wanted more. More adventures, more side stories, heck at this point you might as well reread the damn thing. You’ve been scrolling through tumblr reading as many plot analysis and character breakdowns to the point where you feel like you know everyone like the back of your hand. Everyone feels so real to you like you’ve known them all your life, almost like in another life you were all friends or maybe you were a part of the agency. You laughed to yourself as you picked your phone back up. The rain outside would be nice ambient noise to start the manga over once again. 

You were no stranger to isekai bullshit. It’s not like you had a problem with it. The genre took over the anime scene for years now but you try to stay away from thinking about how you would handle the situation. The last time you thought about inserting yourself into your favorite show you wrote a 100k word xReader fic for your favorite characters and you didn’t want to spend all your time consumed by the brainrot again. Never again, you promised yourself that was the last time you’d let the devil on your shoulder win. The soft pitter patter of the rain brought you back from your thoughts as you clicked on chapter 1 to start the adventure over again. 

—

“Dazai I swear if this was one of your planed double suicides I’m going to kill you!” a voice rang out. You could still feel the cold sensations of floating in water. What were you doing a moment ago and why did those voices sound familiar to you? The last thing you remember was starting over your beloved manga from chapter 1. You didn’t leave the house and none of your friends had keys to get in. Why were there people in your bedroom and why do you feel cold and wet? 

“I assure you if it was, me and this lovely lady would already be dead but unfortunately Atsushi here ruined that miracle for me.”

You choked, it finally hit you. You did, in fact, recognize those voices “D-Dazai?” When your vision came too you were in Atsushi’s lap as Kunikida was shaking his partner. This couldn’t be real. No this had to be a dream. Dammit you could see it now, once you woke up you were going to write another Stray Dogs isekai. You internally groaned. What have you done?

“Ah so sleeping beauty’s awake!” Dazai tapped the blonde’s wrist to get his attention. “Kunikida as a gentleman you should ask her if she’s alright and stop strangling me.” 

Reluctantly the blonde did as he was told and let go, gracefully kneeling in front of you “Are you alright my colleague said you were floating in the river?” his eyes were full of concern. It made a warm feeling bloom throughout your body. Honestly you could get used to this. Wait, did he just say you were floating in the river?

You looked dazed, glancing around to see the familiar riverbank that Atsushi starts at during the very beginning of Bungo Stray Dogs. You looked at your hands. You were still wearing the same clothes you had before you remember falling asleep, admittedly they were much soggier than you remember but you had no memory of how you ended up in the river. Just from the small scene in front of you this was how episode 1 started. If you played along maybe you’d eventually wake up. You’ve had lucid dreams before, it wasn’t too far fetched but the ache in your heart didn’t want you to wake up. Finally you looked up at Kunikida who was patiently waiting for your answer but before you could respond your stomach growled. How embarrassing, now it really was like how the episode played out.

Dazai keeled over laughing “I guess introductions can wait till we get something to eat, how about that?” He offered you a hand over his partner's shoulder to help you up. You snapped out of your haze staring at it a moment before you grabbed his hand and said “I think that’s for the best.” 

What have you gotten yourself into?

At dinner Atsushi spent no time at all stuffing his face as Kunikida and Dazai bantered back and forth. Dialogue you remembered from when you watched the show originally. You forgot how furious Kunikida was over the whole ordeal and you felt bad knowing what Atsushi was going to say next. He really needed a hug and you know what you can finally do that with your circumstances but maybe not right now.

“I came to Yokohama straight from the orphanage. I’ve had nothing to eat and nowhere to sleep since. I thought I’d starve to death.”

“You came from an orphanage?” Dazai questioned. He was sitting across from you casually and despite being hungry you noticed that he didn’t order anything to eat. You had ordered one out of solidarity. You’ve always wanted to try tea on rice but never bothered trying to find a place that makes it in your area. Atsushi was already on his twelfth bowl or so as he continued the conversation. 

“I was yes but they kicked me out.”

“Sounds like a real philanthropic organization.” Dazai turned his attention from Atsushi to you “How about you? Remember anything now?” He rested his head on the back of his hands. You wanted to hold them.

You nodded looking down at your hands. That’s when you got an idea. “I think my name is (Y/N), (Y/N) (L/N). Still trying to work out how I got in the river but,” you paused raising your hands to your face slightly. Your mom had read tons of books about palm reading. Maybe this could be your chance to use what little knowledge you remember to your advantage. “I don’t know this might sound silly but do you mind if I see your hands?”

Dazai tilted his head to the side before he offered you his palms “What brought this on?” You pretended to inspect the lines ghosting over them with your fingers tracing some of them lightly. “When I looked at my hands I had this voice in my head that told me that I could read palms. Mine were kind of fuzzy so I wanted to see if I could read someone else’s” You pretend to see flashbacks, blinking and tensing up for added effect. He played along, chuckling to himself “Well what do you see?”

You forced a careful expression on your face slowly sparing him a glance “A lot you’d rather I not say out loud.” You move to hold his hands in yours giving him a loving squeeze and smile “Odasaku would be proud of you though.” The look he gave you was sharp, his lips in a tight line hearing the name. Before either of you could really finish the exchange Kunikida piped up.

“Dazai we’re not a couple of do good-ers going around helping hard luck cases. We’ve got a job to do.” Kunikida nudged the other with his book. He clearly didn't believe in your charade. You could fix that “Actually I have a feeling I might be able to help with your case if you let me see your hands too.” He gave you a wary look as you made grabby hands at him “Please I swear I’ll explain once I see everyone’s hands.” Dazai gave him a cautious expression but Kunikida gave in. Probably to get it over with so he could go back to work. This time you didn’t try to trace patterns on his palm like you did to Dazai. “Wow, I’ve never seen someone so traumatized by the color blue before.” as he made a choked noise, you turned to Atsushi. “Okay your turn.”

“Do I have too?” 

“Yes, otherwise I’ll be missing a piece of the puzzle and Kunikida and Dazai might think I'm a threat." Atsushi slowly presented them to you. "You see, they're with the Armed Detective Agency and currently they're looking for a white tiger. You know the one that's been "chasing" you." You said "chasing" in air quotes letting go of his hands to do the gesture making sure to give a nod to Dazai about the tiger thing.

In Atsushi’s panic he knocked over his chair and a couple of bowls as he tried to crawl away. You watched the scene play out as Kunikida pinned him to the floor and the interrogation started. You sat patiently as Atsushi was then asked if he was free to be bait. Dazai hadn't taken his eyes off of you letting Kunikida handle Atsushi. Maybe you did go too heavy handed into this.

“Forget it no way!”

You tried to ignore Dazai's gaze and laughed at Atsushi’s outburst trying to lighten the mood. “I don’t know Atsushi. If it’s after you I feel like this is the perfect opportunity to get it off your back for good. What if I tagged along? Strength in numbers right?” He stood up and defended himself “That doesn’t make it better! I’m not doing this okay. I know what you’re thinking, you’re planning to use me as bait-”

“There’s a reward you know.”

From there Atsushi’s fate was sealed and you all made your way over to the warehouse. You waited around for hours, everyone keeping to themselves. You spent the time trying to plan out how you'd explain yourself to Dazai. You could still feel his cautious gaze on you despite him reading his book. You’ve always wanted his attention but not like this. You especially didn't want to be on his shit list. As soon as Atsushi opened his mouth you sighed in relief.

 Finally, it's showtime.

 It’s not like you’d actually be of any help, you just needed to make sure you didn’t die or get in the way. “Guess that’s my cue to leave, I’ll go find Kunikida and the others.” Dazai only smirked and continued to monologue to Atsushi who would not remember the speech later. You casually strode out of the warehouse seeing the others already surrounding the building, hearing the ruckus inside. You didn’t speak, only waved them in as you made your way back to Dazai seeing that the dust had already settled and Atsushi was already on the ground. After everyone else got to take a jab at him the brunette finally spoke.

“I’ve already made my decision. We’re going to make them one of us.” Dazai’s stare made you freeze up. It makes sense to you, keep your friends close but your enemies closer. Not that you were his enemy but you've already proven you don't have an ability. Your little trick worked on him so you weren't gifted and that probably was the worse part. He doesn't know what your intentions are nor what the extent of your talents were and he couldn’t nullify you even if he tried. He was probably evaluating your level of threat to him, the agency or both.

His eyes were staring into your soul. It was so alluring but you couldn't help the fear that was settling in knowing what he was capable of. Well part of it was fear and part of it was intrigue. Why did he have to also be so damn attractive. Your face felt hot but you couldn't look away. You dug your grave now you'd have to lay in it. The whole way back to the dormitory he was guiding you from the small of your back. In any other circumstance the presence of his hand on such a place would have you swooning because that is peak protective boyfriend behavior but instead it was almost threatening like he was trying to make sure you couldn’t run away. However another part of your brain, the demented part, was screaming louder than any of the other voices in your head because it finally hit you that holy shit they were here. This all felt so real and you were playing with fire. 

You made sure to keep up with what was happening, keeping your emotions in check enough to make sure your face or your body language didn’t give anything away. You and Atsushi were given some spare clothes and a cell phone. They only had one room available right now since the other one was being used as storage. They would have it cleared in a day or two. Atsushi tried to give the available one to you but Dazai stepped in and assured him that he'd personally see to it that you were taken care of. Kunikida was actually surprised that Dazai was willing to put in some level of work settling the accommodations. Little does he know what the brunette had in mind. It sent shivers down your spine for all the wrong reasons. When everything was settled Dazai opened the door to his apartment gesturing for you to go inside.

Once you stepped in you took off the shoes the agency just gave you. You had almost forgotten that when you woke up at the river, just like Atsushi, you didn't have any shoes on. No one questioned your strange attire either but you guess after everything they’ve seen it wasn’t the weirdest thing they’ve experienced in their lifetimes. Standing at the doorway to the small room you were waiting for Dazai to direct you where to set your new things down. His futon was still spread out on the floor and the table near its side still had the slight mess of empty bottles and cans. Once you heard the sound of the door’s lock you swallowed hard unintentionally snapping you back to the gravity of the situation. You were alone in a room with ex demon prodigy, Osamu Dazai. 

"You can put that over in the corner." His voice rang in your ear. He was looming over you. He didn't even make a sound crossing the room; he just appeared behind you in a second. You did as you were told, trying to calm down your increasing heart rate. You knelt down to set it on the floor but as you stood back up you staggered back against the wall with Dazai towering over you again.

"You want to tell me who you really are?" He smiled carefree as if he wasn't using his height to corner you. You took a breath relaxing against the wall. His hands were behind his back yet you felt trapped. "I don't work for anyone if that's what you're getting at. I didn't lie about who I was earlier but I didn't need you to show me your hands. Technically I already saw it when you offered to help me up, that is, your past with the port mafia. I genuinely didn't know that was something I could do. That's why I asked to see your palms a second time, it didn’t sit right with me. That's why I asked for you to willingly give me your hands. I'm sorry I brought up oda but it was either him or the hot redhead you call hat rack." You gave him a knowing look that you made the right choice of who to name drop.

He grimaced when you called Chuuya hot. It seemed mentioning him caused him to lose all hostility in his demeanor. Interesting. He must believe you then. "So what do you know?" Dazai seemed to relax enough to sit on the futon. You followed after him since the tension dispersed. "Well since this bit," you moved to grab his hand to point out the part of his palm "is covered in bandages. I only know generally how you met Mori to the present day. I don’t know everything, just little blips here and there that were significant. I didn't look at Kunikida for that long but the Azure king popped up and I knew Atsushi was the tiger all along. Although it wasn't my place to get involved the way I did. Again I apologize." You caressed his hand with your thumb. He was watching you like a hawk. You were looking down thinking if there was anything else you should mention. Hopefully this was enough.

He hummed taking it in for a second before he pulled your arm while pushing your shoulder back, pinning you underneath him. "Are you scared of me? Knowing what I've done." He smirked playfully but his eyes were serious. If he wanted to play games you knew how to combat him. Or at least you think this would be an adequate counter to whatever he was doing now. You smiled "Quite the opposite. I trust you with every fiber of my being." Your words caused his eyes to dilate and his body to tense before he situated himself to further hover over your shorter frame. "Really now, even like this?" His expression dripped with lust as he dipped to whisper in your ear "I could have my way with you if I wanted." An empty threat clearly.

"You definitely could but you won't." You said it so matter of factly he shifted to look at you again. You used your freehand to caress his cheek giving him a soft smile "You have my unconditional trust. The position we're in changes nothing, ya womanizer." The source material never went into detail about Dazai’s past relationships. Only that he’s made women cry and that Chuuya knew of every single last one of them but he’s done his fair share of over the top flirting throughout the series. You just had to steel your nerves and out bluff the conman.

"Does it now?" He hummed giving you a mischievous grin as his hand delicately released its grip on yours sliding down to your wrist. His fingers pressing into your skin trying to find your pulse. Your eyes widened as you realized what he was doing. Your demeanor broke as you squirm underneath him. It was too late, you could see the pleased expression grace his features "Someone should be a little more honest with themselves." He leaned in making your noses touch. You could feel his hot breath on your lips before he pulled away. "Buuuuut you're right, I won't." He abruptly broke the trance you were in sitting up releasing his hold on you making you feel breathless. Your heart was still racing. Curse this attractive waste of bandages. 

"You can take the room! I'll be off to-" He started off cheerily but you reached out to grab his arm. "Nope. As gentlemanly as you are, you can't fool me. Don't flatter yourself. Yes, I find you attractive but I'm not that desperate. Just stay, we’re both adults." You pretended to gasp covering your mouth "Or are you running away because you're all hot and bothered?" You gave him a smirk waiting to see how he’d react. Two could play at this game. He frowned slightly at your challenge. You knew his signature move was running away from every uncomfortable moment he’s caused but if he backed down from your challenge now you'd win and Dazai doesn’t like to lose. So you shared the futon and you slept with Osamu Dazai.

[discobrainrot]

Kim/Harry for the ask meme? Sorry if someone already asked

Anon. Anon.

PANDORA'S BOX, ANON.

YOU JUST RIPPED THE FUCKING LID OFF.

So, this might be my OTP, so uhhhhhh this one might be longer than the others (somehow lmfao). God, I have so many, this is gonna be hard to pick. More folks can ask for HCs for these guys. Hell, ask me for HCs about them in different AUs!!! I have HCs for days!!!!

1. Harry is the first person to treat Kim like this.

"Like this." That's a broad statement. It's a broad statement for a reason.

Harry is an all-encompassing experience. He assaults the senses from every conceivable angle. Sight, sound, scent - I imagine you can practically taste his sweat from across a room. A warm blanket. A void that swallows the world. You are either consumed Harry Du Bois, or you aren't. There's no in-between.

So, when Kim is the centre of Harry's attention, it's like nothing he's ever experienced. No one has seen Kim like this. But, at the same time, no one has witnessed the raw core of his being and not understood it in such a visceral, primal way.

It's not "you should take those racist comments as a compliment," it's "what's Seol?" It's not "you're one of the good gay people,'' it's "what's homosexuality?"

All Harry knows is how to pick at scabs, tear at stitches, and pull the lifeblood out of people's veins. It's raw. It hurts.

It's beautiful.

Kim has never been put on a pedestal before. He's always been the second, third, even fourth choice. He copes with people implying (or outright stating) that he doesn't belong because of his race (and certainly his sexuality, although we don't encounter that in game). He's a self proclaimed spoilsport - not who the 57th would really want present for a Cop-Off. He's nothing special in his own eyes. Just getting by.

But Harry... Oh, Harry. He wants every part of Kim the way that no one else has. He wants the things that make him angry. The things that make him sad. He wants the parts that Kim hid long, long ago. He wants what hides under the survival instincts and professionalism. He wants to dance in a church.

And, by god, Kim wants to dance, too.

2. Kim was infatuated first, but Harry was in love first.

I think that Kim got butterflies when Harry called him cool on the balcony, but he wasn't completely caught off balance. It was... nice. It was something fun, but it didn't make him fall hard and fast. Attraction is one thing, but I don't think Kim would have fallen first.

Harry, though... Ten days. I think ten days is all it would take for him. I think he's in love the second he asks Kim to join the 41st, but he doesn't have the words to explain it. He just knows that he doesn't want a life without Kim.

Maybe it's the skills trying to protect him (especially having recently experienced the Final Dream), or maybe they're as lost as he is. They just think he's fucking cool. They know he's important. But this is a new kind of deification. With Dora, it was straight forward.

A beautiful woman gives Harry the time of day. Done. Cross your lungs, get on your knees. Easy as 1, 2, 3.

Kim, though? Oh man. He's cool. He knows shit. He can play pinball (cool) but hates it (even cooler). Did you know that there's a very, very slim chance of Kim actually managing to shoot the body out of the tree? BECAUSE IT HAPPENED IN ONE OF MY PLAYTHROUGHS. It blew my mind, and in that instant I was RIGHT with Harry.

Call me Disco "Would Do Anything For Kim" Brainrot. (I mean, call me Misc or Milo, but you know lol).

Regardless - Harry is in love. He's off his rocker, totally, deeply in love way before the word materializes in his broken brain. And as he grapples with everything, Kim preens under his attention. He thinks it's cute. He thinks it's nice to feel wanted.

Still waters run deep, but he's underestimating the depth of Harry's rapids. Welcome to the undertow, boys.

3. Kim can't pronounce Harrier with his accent.

Look. You can't take this from me. If anyone finds the Derierre Du Bois post, please link it b/c I can't find it right now.

But come on. Come on.

Harrier? In the language that decided pronouncing "H" and "R" are optional? I know that his voice actor can say "Harry" and "Harrier." I simply Do Not Care.

It's AH-ree-AH instead of "Harrier." It's AH-ree instead of "Harry."

THAT is why it's "Detective" or "Officer" most of the time. He's fucking embarrassed, but Harry loves the way Kim says his name.

[damagedintellect]

Nakahara Chuuya x Reader

💌 Would this be considered a social suicide? : Chapter 1  💌  

Summary: You knew it was dangerous to take walks at night but hearing the water rushing under the bridge was calming to your nerves. You didn’t imagine you’d ever fall into the river and somehow wake up in your favorite anime. The isekai that I’m sure will come back to haunt me. It’s kept me up all night but I might as well get the brainrot out.

Notes: Reader is Isekai’d into BSD, Slow to start, Chuuya is endgame but there’s a fair bit of reader & Dazai moments too 

💌 Word count: 2,348 💌  Available Chapters [You are here] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8]

You stood over the bridge looking out at the sunset. You would have to return home before it got too dark but the tranquil sound of the rushing water underneath you always calms your nerves after an episode. Things have been pretty rough lately but you’d live. As a writer you were your worst critic. You were almost done with your first big manuscript and you just needed to get past the final hurdle before you could start seeking out publishing companies. At the beginning your novel came easy but as the ending chapters were approaching you started to dread finishing it. The unknown future was a scary thought. Multiple what if’s flooding your mind. The fear that you would have wasted the better of a year and a half writing a story for no actual gain was one of them. It shouldn’t be considered wasted time because writing it helped you in many ways but the ever looming thought that you could have accomplished much more in the same amount of time is a burden that will never leave you alone. If only things could be as easy as the media you consumed. Your recent obsession with a certain anime series wasn’t helping either but it’s captivated your heart and it’s all you think about nowadays. Which is what spurred on the little tiff with your writing. All you’ve done recently is play the Bungo Stray Dogs mobile game trying to pull the rate up Chuuya unit to the point where you were actually no lifing it. While you agree that you might be going overboard just a little, you might actually have formed an addiction to playing marbles. You honestly preferred when you were analyzing and fantasizing about the contrast of the strong bonded characters. Not to mention how much you can see yourself in everyone. The amount of character study is comforting to you and one day you wish to write something that makes others feel the way you do when you read BSD. From your perspective this was just research but to the rest of the world haha whoops just your autism is showing. It’s a limiting belief you weren’t sure how to get rid of either. The need to constantly do and be productive with your time otherwise you fail at society when ultimately success is subjective.

Before you could turn around you were harshly grabbed by the arm. You were pushed against the railing as your assailant threatened you to stay quiet. A knife was brandished against your neck but almost foolishly the wrong side was being pressed against you. The man reeked of alcohol so maybe he wasn’t all there right now. Mustering as much rage and aggression you’ve been bottling up for years you think to yourself that this was now or never. If there was one thing you have been thinking about since childhood it was pulling off a Miss Congeniality. Shouldering him in the gut, stepping on his foot, elbow to the face, and finishing it off with a swift kick to the dick. Panic was starting to kick in. You didn’t think that would work but that doesn’t matter right now you should start running. As you were about to bolt he grabbed your leg and your dumbass clutched onto the railing trying to use your bodyweight to break free and it worked due to the thug letting you go but your momentum was already set in motion. You threw yourself over the railing crashing in the icy water below.

—

“Dazai I swear if this was one of your planed double suicides I’m going to kill you!” a voice rang out. You could still feel the sensations of floating your memory murky. 

“I assure you if it was, me and this lovely lady would already be dead but unfortunately Atsushi here ruined that miracle for me.”

You choked, you recognized those voices “D-Dazai?” When your vision came too you were in Atsushi’s lap as Kunikida was shaking his partner. This couldn’t be real. 

“Ah so sleeping beauty’s awake. Kunikida as a gentleman you should ask her if she’s alright and stop strangling me.” 

Reluctantly the blonde did as he was told and let go, kneeling in front of you “Are you alright my colleague said you were floating in the river?” his eyes were full of concern.

You looked dazed, glancing around to see the familiar riverbank that Atsushi starts at during the very beginning of Bungo Stray Dogs. You looked at your hands. You were still wearing the same clothes you put on this morning, admittedly they were much soggier than you remember but you had no memory of the day or how you ended up in the river. For some reason you knew who these people were and what seemingly happens to them in the future. The most notable thing was you were grossly aware of the fact that this universe belonged to your favorite manga that currently was on its 108th chapter? This had to be a dream. If you played along maybe you’d eventually wake up. You’ve had lucid dreams before, it wasn’t too far fetched but the ache in your heart didn’t want you to wake up. Finally you looked up at Kunikida who was patiently waiting for your answer but before you could give a response your stomach growled. How embarrassing, now you really wanted to die.

Dazai keeled over laughing “I guess introductions can wait till we get something to eat, how about that?” He offered you a hand over his partner's shoulder to help you up. You snapped out of your haze to grab his hand and say “I can’t remember much so I think that’s for the best.” 

What have you gotten yourself into?

At dinner Atsushi spent no time at all stuffing his face as Kunikida and Dazai bantered back and forth. Dialogue you remembered from when you watched the show originally. You forgot how furious Kunikida was over the whole ordeal and you felt bad knowing what Atsushi was going to say next. He really needed a hug.

“I came to Yokohama straight from the orphanage. I’ve had nothing to eat and nowhere to sleep since. I thought I’d starve to death.”

“You came from an orphanage?” Dazai questioned. He was sitting across from you casually and despite being hungry you noticed that he didn’t order anything to eat. You had ordered one out of solidarity. You’ve always wanted to try tea on rice but never bothered trying to find a place that makes it in your area. Atsushi was already on his twelfth bowl or so as he continued the conversation. 

“I was yes but they kicked me out.”

“Sounds like a real philanthropic organization.” Dazai turned his attention from Atsushi to you “How about you? Remember anything now?” He rested his head on the back of his hands.

You nodded “I think my name is (Y/N), (Y/N) (L/N). Still trying to work out where I came from and how I got in the river but it’s something to start.” Being vague was probably for the best right now. Although you would have to find some way into the Armed Detective Agency eventually. After that you could be a little more bold with your knowledge. Without an ability though, it would be by the skin of your teeth and your memory of the events to come. Not everyone in the agency had an ability or combative skills but they had plot armor, you sadly do not. Being caught up with the manga was great for knowing everything to come but you'd have to remember things you've read and watched months ago. There was no room for error as it stood currently. Your life literally depended on it. You wondered if you could pull it off. If you didn't you could always try the port mafia. It would be more risky and twice as dangerous but at least you could hopefully get a glimpse of a certain redhead before you died. Who knows, could be fun.

“Dazai we’re not a couple of do good-ers going around helping hard luck cases. We’ve got a job to do.” Kunikida nudged the other with his book leading Atsushi to question “That reminds me. You said that your current job involves the military. What kind of work do you do.”

“We’re private investigators” Dazai gave his signature smirk bringing his hand up to rest under his chin. What an absolute dork you loved this waste of bandages.

“Investigators?”

“But we handle more than lost pets and cheating spouses. Our office has uniquely gifted investigators, we’re the Armed Detective Agency.”

You sat upright with Atsushi. While he was having his little monologue you softly muttered “The Armed Detective Agency.” trailing off you made your eyes as wide as you could like you were seeing a vision before you shook your head staring back as Atsushi. “Tiger?” you stated in a hushed tone. Hopefully you were acting strange enough for Dazai to notice, it was the only way your plan was going to work out. You needed a reason to be kept around but not to upstage Atsushi's importance. Not like that could really happen since he is the tiger but still. You needed your bases covered without being too off the wall. The harsh bottom line was this was your only chance because you have no idea if your choices affect the story yet. On top of that you have no money, no friends and no shelter so they were your only option.

“You guys are looking for a tiger.” You stated it as a fact, regaining their attention after Dazai’s little health hanging prank.

Kunikida stopped strangling Dazai as the two exchanged looks. “We never said what the job was, it's not supposed to be a secret or anything but how’d you come to that conclusion?” He pushed up his glasses for emphasis.  

You tilted your head for effect. “I don’t know it was just a feeling I got when I looked at Atsushi kinda like a weird deja vu.” you played it off quizzically like you were also figuring things out as they progressed. 

Atsushi stared across the table “You’re looking for a tiger?” You could feel him tense.

“Yes, a ferocious man eater who's recently appeared in the city. Well not that we know for sure it's devoured anyone but it’s ransacked warehouses, eaten farm animals and caused general chaos. The authorities have received all kinds of scary reports about it” Dazai sighed, slipping back into his uninterested mood. In Atsushi’s panic he knocked over his chair and a couple of bowls as he tried to crawl away. You watched the scene play out as Kunikida pinned him to the floor and the interrogation started. You sat patiently as Atsushi was then asked if he was free to be bait.

“Forget it no way!”

You laughed at Atsushi’s outburst trying to lighten the mood. “I don’t know Atsushi. If it’s after you I feel like this is the perfect opportunity to get it off your back for good. What if I tagged along? Strength in numbers right?” He stood up and defended himself “That doesn’t make it better! I’m not doing this okay. I know what you’re thinking, you’re planning to use me as bait-”

“There’s a reward you know.”

From there Atsushi’s fate was sealed and you all made your way over to the warehouse. You waited around for hours, everyone keeping to themselves. This was something they didn’t show you in anime but you figured time would pass as normal anyhow. You were laying on one of the crates that was across from Atsushi. You had been staring up at the ceiling after staring at Dazai became boring. He was literally reading his book. You saw his eyes move across the page. You really weren't sure what else you expected. As soon as Atsushi opened his mouth you rolled your eyes.

 Finally, show time.

 It’s not like you’d actually be of any help, you just needed to make sure you didn’t die or get in the way. Hopefully the groundwork you set prior would be enough. If you were in Dazai's shoes and some girl you've never seen before who has amnesia but happens to know the details of your mission, it would be pretty strange. It's not as strong as Atsushi’s but fingers crossed it was enough. When Atsushi started to turn, you stretched and said “Guess that’s my cue to leave, I’ll let Kunikida and the others know.” Dazai only smirked and continued to monologue to Atsushi who would not remember the speech later. You casually strode out of the warehouse seeing the others already surrounding the building, hearing the ruckus inside. You didn’t speak, only waved them in as you made your way back to Dazai seeing that the dust had already settled and Atsushi was already on the ground. After everyone else got to take a jab at him the brunette finally spoke.

“I’ve already made my decision. We’re going to make them one of us.”

You sighed in relief when he gestured to you as well. You didn't want to be presumptuous and assume he meant "them" as in plural when that's not always the case. Regardless, your personal mission was accomplished. It was enough to be lumped in with Atsushi but you weren’t out of the woods yet. It was enough to get you through the night. If you didn’t wake up from this dream you’d still have the entrance exam to worry about. Then the matter of how much you give away about possibly having an ability and next being able to live the lie you’ve crafted. As a writer it shouldn’t be that hard to craft yourself a solid backstory but there was still no proof of your existence outside waking up at the riverside. You’d have to be careful but you were up for the challenge. After all, what have you got to lose?

Chapter 1 | Next Chapter =>