#john winchester deserves to rot in hell

[im-some-lionheart]

he called his dad. he... he was scared and alone and didn't know what to do and he called his dad for help, for guidance, for an order to follow, to regain his sense of self and what does he get??? a fucking voice mail telling him to call himself...

are you kidding me??

Dean really is the embodiment of "you're on your own kid, you always have been".

[xcaliburmoz]

after how many times hinting at john winchester's abusive perantage will the writers of spn stop trying to make him out as a good person?

im not really feeling the blind family loyalty they try to shove down my throat

[im-some-lionheart]

I was going to make a joke about how dean just has this submissive and breedable instinct to follow orders like cas you need to demand and he will obey gladly and quickly 😉 but no actually, come to think of it, the only way dean knows how to interact with other people's requests is if they're orders. if they're imposed on him, he will follow orders like the loyal soldier his dad raised him to be. But being asked??? being told (even implicitly) that his opinion matters at all and that he has the option to say no to something someone else wants from him? it does not compute in his mind. so he might say no when asked "may I?" but mainly bc he's confused –see, his face and previous line "what? this?" (implicit: why would you want this?). But the second cas switches from question to order, Dean folds without any attempt at resistance at all. Because that's what he was raised and brainwashed to do. I'm crying now. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

I just love this scene. A lot.

May I? No. vs Gimme! As you wish.

[shadowsbrainrot]

our dean gets so pissed at canon dean when he’s being a j*hn apologist

[therebetterbepie]

outofpie;

happy fathers day to those who celebrate it. to the dads who deserve it!

casual reminder that john winchester was a child abusing piece of shit and deserved to rot in hell. :)

[rose-of-oz]

💌 + Via Winchester my beloved

Ahhhh, I always love asks for my Hunter baby, thank you so much for this!! Also gonna tag Via’s other biggest fans @aceyanaheim, @endless-oc-creations, and @manyfandomocs!! <3 <3

Via/Eleleth (my most beautiful and beloved of babies).

Cael a.k.a. Charles/Bobby (the gay dads of the Winchester family).

Dean/Castiel (because I couldn’t not do it).

Sam/Gabriel (in this house we support both Sabriel and pan Sam Winchester).

Jo/Charlie (I always thought it would have been cool if they’d gotten to know each other).

John/rotting in Hell forever (as he deserves).

send me 💌 + an oc/fic and i’ll tell you all the endgame ships in the fic!!

[jjongleurs]

That scene in 10x9—when Sam, Dean, and Cas are at the bar talking about their dads because Cas is trying to do right by Clair but is having a hard time doing so—is just... I don’t know. The fact that they’re just hanging out, talking, reminiscing, opening up. It’s sweet, and I wish we had more moments like that. 

While I love the fact that they’re just talking, the fact that Sam and Dean are talking about John freaking Winchester positively when it comes to his parenting? NO. I could rant about how the writers just... heavily missed the mark with this scene, but I’m just gonna roll with it and try to fit it into the good version of Supernatural that only exists in my head. 

This scene just shows me just how badly John treated them, honestly. They just don’t realize what a good parent is. Dean says he loved his dad more than anything, but that love really is just attachment and dependency. There was never any sense of stability in their lives other than it was just the three of them in the impala. No home, no friends, no other figures or role models (other than Bobby, who was more of a father than John ever was, but that’s a different post to be written). Dean says he loved his dad, but he feared him, emulated him, and idolized him because of the circumstances of his life.

He thinks back fondly on the time John managed to find him at CBGBs, but what he fails to realize is that John was the one to put him in that position anyway. Dean sought out that experience out of rebellion. John said what he could and couldn’t do from the time he was 4 years old onwards. From assigning him weapons training at Bobby’s (which Bobby thankfully said fuck that and just played ball with him, giving him a rare opportunity to just be a kid), to assigning him the duty of being Sam’s caretaker and guardian. Dean always had instructions, a role, a duty. He never got to be his own person. He was exactly who his dad wanted him to be. And he ultimately just wanted to please his dad. He took up the same vices, same interests, same demeanor, same wardrobe, etc. He rebelled in the only way he could, and John still found him. 

Then dean talks about people at CBGBs fearing John and laughs about the really intimidating guy with piercings and tattoos saying, “Sorry, sir.” to John. If a grown ass man responded with fear to John, how the hell did Dean feel? He was still a child when this happened, and he’s remembering it now as an adult. He’s remembering it with a nostalgia, a distance, probably some distortion from time. I can guarantee Dean was scared out of his mind, drunk as he was, especially to be as drunk as he was and still remember it all. 

Then Cas says, “He saved you.” And yes, Dean was in a very dangerous situation, and yes, John did technically save him. Who knows what could have happened to Dean that night. But Cas is an angel, and he doesn’t know what it’s like to be a father (yet) or what it’s like to be a child. John did save Dean, but he put him in that situation. John didn’t give Sam or Dean a normal life or any normal ways to rebel or to even just have fun. Had John just... done right by his sons and continued giving them the typical, boring life most people have (NOT the one that involves hunting dangerous things and putting his own life and that of his sons on the line every single day), Dean rebelling would have looked like.. sneaking out of his window to see a boy or a girl he liked or drinking his vodka with friends and replacing it with water or taking the Impala for a random joyride or dying his hair, getting a piercing, getting a stick and poke or just any other typical teenage act of rebellion. The more healthy kind of rebellion. 

John told him, in response to Dean saying he hated him, “It’s not my job to be liked. It’s my job to raise you right.” Well, John failed at both spectacularly. He raised traumatized, repressed, dysfunctional, depressed, anxious, self-loathing, co-dependent sons with no sense of their emotions or healthy coping mechanisms that find no value in their life other than hunting and looking out for each other. And Dean knows this. He doesn’t believe a word he or Sam are saying. Maybe Sam believes it, because Dean shielded him his whole life and was a far better father than John ever could be, but Dean only pretends he does. You can see it written all over his face, the distant look in his eyes, the way he sips at the glass of whiskey distractedly. John was never a father to them and he never made the effort. He never made them feel loved or supported. He never taught them to just... be people. 

John didn’t raise his sons, he trained hunters, soldiers. There was no love there, only duty and dependency on family. Their love was inherently dysfunctional because of John’s selfish need for revenge. Instead of loving his sons twice as much and committing to give them a good life after their mom died, he went on a lifelong revenge trip to kill the demon responsible. He was an awful, selfish, abusive father and Sam and Dean are his victims. Maybe John wasn’t an absent father in the same way God/Chuck was to Castiel—physically absent, but he was emotionally absent. He never behaved like a father, and Sam and Dean don’t hardly know any better.

[im-some-lionheart]

something about Bobby stabbing himself while possessed to avoid killing Dean vs Dean realizing John was possessed bc he said he was proud of him

[multifandomnerd4532]

I HATE JOHN WINCHESTER SO MUCH I HATE HIM J HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM. HE DOESNT DESERVE HEAVEN I WISH CROWLEY WOULD STEP ON HIS THROAT I WISH CAS FREAKS HIM OUT I WISH HE ROTS AND I WISH BENNY RIPPED HIS THROAT OUT

I’m watching the Bad boys ep AND DEAN WAS HAPOY HE WAS SAFE AND HE WAS LIVED AND HE WASNT HUNGRY OR ALONE AND JOHN DOESNT EVEN LET HIM HAVE A NICE DAY WITH THE GIRL HE LIKES AND HE SEES SAM AND HE LEAVES AND HES CRYING AND IM CRYING I HATE JOHN WINCHESTER I HATE HIM SO MUCH

[interrogatethecat]

cas wouldn’t be happy to see dean in heaven. that’s why he wasn’t in the finale. he couldn’t bear to see dean. not when dean deserved the world, deserved to live. that’s the only reason he wasn’t there. because seeing dean dead and unhappy was worse than not seeing him at all.

[anhappyfangirl]

This night I might have sleep about two hours only but I am wide awake and working only through the furious hate i currently have for john winchester

[absandersons]

r u going to watch the winchesters?

Hello! This is going to be a long winded answer because I talk too much lmaoooo

tldr: no.

Look, maybe it will be good. Maybe it’ll be an interesting look at Dean manipulating the story to make it his own, whether that’s in heaven (I think so, from the KAZ plate), or on earth. Maybe the characters will be interesting and dynamic. Maybe it’ll be fun and new and different.

Hell, maybe Cas will make an appearance (I doubt it, but who knows?)

But there is nothing, nothing on this earth that is going to get me to watch a John Winchester redemption tour. I don’t care if it’s all Dean’s false narrative, I don’t care if it’s not real, I don’t care if he’s funny and goofy and a “good person” in this show, I don’t care because I saw the aftermath of the abuse he inflicted on his sons for fifteen seasons.

I saw the way Dean’s face twisted when he talked about Flagstaff, when he talked about Stanford. I saw the way Sam looked when he talked about his father.

I saw the way he got angry at Bobby for letting Dean play catch, how he missed Christmas, how he left Dean to “rot in jail” when he was stealing food for Sam. I saw him put everything on Dean’s shoulders from the time he was four years old.

Dean says it himself: “My father was an obsessed bastard! I didn’t deserve what he put on me!”

They say in Supernatural, more than once, that John abused Sam and Dean. Even if the abuse was never physical, it was certainly emotional, certainly neglectful.

And sure, he lost Mary, but as Dean says, the marriage wasn’t perfect until after she died.

John is not three dimensional. He never has been. He’s flat, a villain that’s compared to the devil himself, and Jensen always seems to forget that.

I don’t care who John Winchester was, I care about who he became, and there’s nothing Jensen Ackles and Robbie Thompson can do to make that character palatable to me.

I hope the show is good, I hope people enjoy it, I wish that I could say I’d watch it for Dean, but I just…can’t. Because there were so many stories they could have told that didn’t have anything to do with John Winchester.

[antichristsammy]

the fact the john is in heaven is the most unrealistic thing about spn

[pinknatural]

Dean tries, really tries, to think of it as a present. Finally, his dad is letting loose on the ropes a bit, finally letting him hunt on his own. But it’s kinda hard to convince himself when his dad sent him in with the case already figured out, with everything but the manual labor already done. 

It’s more like an errand he wants me to complete, Dean thinks resentfully, digging his shovel into the soft dirt. Happy birthday, go dig up two graves. Have fun! 

Dean huffs and pivots to the grave beside the other one. According to Dean’s research, the nuns had wanted to be buried together, but when the convent found their bodies they hadn’t really gone for that option. They had been buried next to each other, though, which makes Dean’s job just a little bit easier. 

He starts digging, even though he hasn’t finished digging out the first grave. You gotta dig ‘em up at the same time, ‘cause if you gank one then her lover gets angry, and the last thing Dean needs is an angry ghost harassing him while he digs up a grave. He can’t help but think that those other nuns should’ve buried them together. Not just because it would make Dean’s life easier, but because they wanted it. Because they were in love, and they killed themselves, and the convent owed them that much. 

Dean inhales, then exhales, his breath escaping in a little white cloud. It’s chilly, ‘cause it’s January, but it’s not too cold. He’s not wearing gloves or anything but he can still feel his hands. He shifts to the other grave and starts digging. 

He remembers what Charlie at the last school said about what his dad got him for his seventeenth birthday--a new car. Lindsey got a fancy necklace. Jake’s birthday hadn’t come up yet, but he’d been hoping for a dog. All Dean has is blisters on his fingers and a sore back from when the ghost of Sister Felicity threw him into a bookcase while he was retrieving the prayer book the nuns’d passed notes to each other in. That book, which had notes in the margins of their love, is gone now. Dean burned it.

Tears sting at Dean’s eyes. He must’ve been too soft, about Jake. He must’ve--something must’ve given him away. Why else would he be punished like this?

He knows, Dean thinks. He knows, he knows, he knows. It becomes a mantra, moving in time with his shovel. He switches graves. 

It’s just that it’s his birthday. The message--the warning--would’ve gotten across regardless, Dean thinks. But why, of all days, why his birthday? Why can’t Dean have a fucking break for once? 

Seventeen sucks, Dean thinks, hitting the first coffin. He climbs out of the hole and switches to the other one. It supremely sucks. Sixteen you get a drivers’ license, eighteen you can, like, vote or whatever, but seventeen is nothing. Just a bunch of shit. 

He knows, he knows, he knows. 

Dean hits the second coffin and breaks it open. The bones are like the ones in Sister Perpetua’s grave--pale and gross, just like most bones are. Dean doesn’t know why he kind of expected different. He climbs out and throws his shovel aside, picks up the thing of salt. He dumps it on one grave, then the other. Lighter fluid, next. Dean’s done this before. Even if Dad and Sammy are usually here, Dean knows how this goes. 

He takes the matchbook from his pocket, strikes one and drops it, then the other. The graves light up, the flame flickering bright and warm, and Dean thinks he hears screaming. He drops to his knees and whispers, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

He realizes that he’s still crying, that tears have run down his face, and for the first time on this supremely shitty birthday, he’s glad to be alone, kneeling between the graves of two women who were in love, twin fires burning bright on either side of him. 

-

Dean wakes up slowly, as he often does these days. There’s a warm blanket around his shoulders, and under that a heavy arm slung over his waist. Sometimes Dean remembers the days he was too antsy to even get under the covers, ready to jump into action at any minute, and it all seems so absurd. 

Light trickles in softly from the window across the room, and the arm around Dean’s waist tightens. Dean turns, slow, smiling already at the sight he knows will greet him. 

Cas is kind of awake, squinting at him but smiling, his hair ruffled and sticking out everywhere, and Dean feels sort of like he might burst. 

“Mmm,” he says. “Good morning.” He stretches his own arm around Cas’s shoulders and draws the man closer to him, Cas’s arm shifting from it’s loose hold to pull their chests together. 

“Happy birthday, Dean,” Cas says, his voice even lower, rough from sleep. Dean grins, tucks his face under Cas’s chin to hide it. 

“Every day’s my birthday when I get to wake up to the best present ever laying in my bed,” Dean says, even though that’s ridiculously sappy and also doesn’t make sense. 

“I am not a present, Dean,” Cas says, and Dean makes a ‘hmm’ noise. 

“I was talking about Miracle, dumbass,” he says, nudging the sleeping dog in question with his toes.

“Of course you were,” Cas says indulgently, like he’s just humoring him. Which is fair, possibly. Dean thinks that Cas spends a lot of time just humoring him. 

“Do you know what time it is?” Dean asks, shifting his arm to touch the back of Cas’s neck, right at the spot where his t-shirt meets his skin.

“It doesn’t matter,” Cas says, holding him tighter like he thinks Dean will get out of bed, which is quite frankly an absurd idea. It’s a Sunday, and it’s his birthday. Dean has nowhere else to be.

“It might, since Sammy’s coming over today,” Dean says, even though Sam and Eileen are coming over in the late afternoon and it’s definitely still morning.

“Well, it’s not time for them to come yet,” Cas says. “We can get up later.”

Dean definitely agrees, and he snuggles back down into Cas, getting even more comfortable. He’s just thinking about falling back asleep, maybe, deciding that this is his best birthday ever, even though it’s only been like ten minutes, when he remembers his worst birthday and has to pause. 

“Dean?” Cas asks. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m…” Dean noses against him, taking a deep breath. “You read my...my dad’s journal?”

“Yes,” Cas says warily. The journal is usually safe, but Cas can get pissy when John Winchester is mentioned. 

“You remember my seventeenth birthday?” Dean asks, and then all of a sudden his angel is trying to squeeze the life out of him. Dean appreciates it, even though he can’t really breathe. 

“I remember,” Cas growls, and Dean pats his shoulder. 

“I was just thinking about how that was the worst, and this is the best,” Dean says, and Cas relaxes his hold a little. “I, uh...that day felt like a huge warning. And now I’m here, with you, and, uh, it’s pretty awesome, not gonna lie.”

“John Winchester deserves to rot in hell for eternity for what he did to you and Sam,” Cas says. “But I am glad to be here with you, and I agree that it’s pretty awesome.”

“I love you,” Dean says, helpess as he always is in the face of Cas’s protectiveness. 

“I love you too,” Cas says, moving a hand to tenderly cradle Dean’s jaw. He begins to guide Dean’s head towards his, and Dean is so sorry to interrupt, but--

“Do you smell pancakes?” he asks, and Cas pauses, considering. 

“Yes,” he says finally. 

“Well, if I’m here in bed, and you’re here in bed, and Miracle, I’m pretty sure, can’t make pancakes, and is also in bed, then who…”

“Jack,” they say together, and Dean laughs. 

“Do we trust Jack with the stove?”

“He is God,” Cas says, but that doesn’t sound like a ‘yes’. They look at each other and then sigh, rolling apart so they can get out of bed. 

“We’ll continue this later,” Dean says, pointing at Cas, who nods. 

“Of course,” he says, and he reaches out and grabs Dean’s shirt, pulling him in for a sadly-brief kiss. “Happy birthday.”

Dean beams at him, and then they go downstairs to help their son make pancakes without burning the house down, Miracle bounding down the stairs beside them, and Dean can’t help but agree with his earlier assessment--that this is his best birthday ever. 

(ao3)

[xsimxx77]

Dean ❤️😭

So yeah Spn ended and ep20 sucked and it's been days and I still can't process ! (I'm a mess btw so God knows how this will come out)

The finale sucked and dean's death sucked basically I'm devastated !! And no it's not just "another Tv character's death" it's not just "a death" no ! it just sucks and lemme start up with some shit here !

So why his death is just bullshit !

Dean out of no where was put into some circumstances that can't be understood or be dealth with at 4 LIKE 4 ! Like suddenly his life just turned upside down and he was faced with "you gotta take care of ur little brother!" HOW WOULD A 4 YEAR OLD UNDERSTAND WHAT TAKING CARE OF SOMEONE MEAN !!? but he did it anyways and guess what he freaking did amazing job in that !!

But wait -

HOW OLD WAS DEAN RIGHT HERE !!!? (btw this is the dark side of the moon ep when angels made them relive their fav memories ) he used to do what he was always doing his whole life !!! His father just messed up sth and he just went there and tried to fix it , tried to make it better for his mother ! He just did that !! And Sammy was like wow "never realized how long" ! yeah Sammy apparently he's been doing this his whole freaking life !

He had to do things that weren't even his job even before Mary's death! He was just so good that he couldn't see her anxious or sad about certain stuff ! And HE WAS SO YOUNG BACK THEN OMG !

yeah He never had a childhood thanks to his lovely father ! Been treated his whole life as a soldier , was raised like one !! He was always convinced that he had one job , just one job ! What he felt and how he felt never really mattered !

Reminder: he never got to graduate , never got to college ! And how he was just so proud that his samrtass brother went to Stanford is just so precious !

"Always wanted to be a fireman" wanted ! What a word huh ! And again sammy went just like wow "never told me that" yeah Sam cuz what he wanted was never important apparently !

He always thought that the things he loved were just never his things , thinking he is nothing and no one. Always thought that he's not really worth anything !!

Imagine being convinced that everyone around u will leave u at certain point and u can't be enough ! and how he's so attached to his family knowing he can't be that for them !!

And don't u dare tell me that John didn't really affect him with so many things !! His whole life Dean was just trying to be good for the man!

Yeah I mean what a bright life right

and yes we can clearly see Dean using sarcasm in facing his problems ! Just all with the "Idc what happens to me" attitude but not bcz he's just careless like that nah not really he's just too scared to admit that he is scared if that makes sense ! U can see that clearly in many seasons

in s3 Sam was trying to find a way to save his brother ! And dean was just like u can't do anything cuz there's no way and acting with the "careless" sarcastic way he is and Sam was just like "How can you" , "what's wrong with you!" He just can't let himself feel that he will be saved cuz there is nothing that can save him , he even admits that he is scared later on !

and to me Dean is this one dude with that mindset that he can't have hope , he won't allow himself to have hope ! So yeah he can't let himself believe that Sam will save him bcz what if he believed that and it just didn't work ! He's just too scared !! I mean can you imagine that !!

he was just so scared dammit !!

S10 (this whole season was so heartbreaking tbh)

and here !! (btw this the paint it black ep) How he just admits that he keeps expecting death ! And how he's just scared !!! "there's people , things feelings I want to experience differently!" And again with the want word !! HE WANTED THINGS FOR HIMSELF but never thought or even made things for HIMSELF !! and u telling me why this hurts so bad !!

He loved cars , wanted to be a mechanic or maybe even a rockstar and we can see that from previous seasons but he gets to talk about it with that girl in the "bad boys" ep ! reminder : that this is the "let him rot in jail" ep ! Imagine Dean with that mind of his and all of those thoughts thinking he's not worth it and shit like that only for his amazing father to leave him out there just like that !!! Thanks again John ! 🙃 YOU CAN'T TELL ME THAT HE DIDN'T HAVE DREAMS OF HIS OWN !! But again he did come back for baby Sammy and I love him !!

I just love him sm and I know he never deserved any of this !!

How he was just convinced that he's just a grunt and couldn't see himself as this smart strong hero he truely is !!!😭 HE'S BEEN FIGHTING HIS WHOLE LIFE ! He'S BEEN SO GOOD HIS WHOLE FREAKING LIFE !!

How he just kept questioning why would an angel save him from hell !! "Why me !!? If there is a God out there why would he give a crap about me ?"

Never really came across his mind that he's worth it !

he never knew , never been told how great he was until Cas happened !! And Cas , this one angel is a wholeee other story !❤️🥺

"imagine telling someone u love 'em only to have him give u this face !" Yeah lol that was funny but u know what ! imagine believing ur whole freaking life that ur nothing and not really worth anything , that ur just so pathetic and can't do anything and then having soemone just state how good and lovely you are and that they love u ! Like love u ! Yeah I find that funny too u know ! Like look at his face it just feels like "don't tell me that cuz I ain't worth it , I ain't that good Cas "

and I just love Cas so much cuz he just wanted to show Dean how lovely , selfless and just how precious he is !

Cas loved Dean the way he should be loved !! He just saw right thru his soul and loved it all !! Cuz he saw exactly what he is !! saw it all and understood it AND HE FREAKING LOVED HIM FOR EVERYTHING!!

and when we finally see Dean kinda accepting that yes he might be worth it , that yes he might be good just like Cas said ! That he deserves to live a life for himself !! They just kill him off !! Just like that ! Throwing everything away !

And this this this right here just hits so hard and painfully rn !! Cuz How many times did Dean say this over many seasons !! Like how many times did he say that "a hunt gone wrong" is what gonna end him !! and seriously don't u dare tell me that yeah he was just ok with that or he wasn't really scared or that *the ending* he's got is the perfect one for him cuz nah !! IT'S FREAKING NOT !!! He kept saying that and he was expecting that !! HE WAS EXPECTING GETTING KILLED LIKE THAT ALL HIS FREAKING LIFE !! But he was literally dreading it !!!That's why this sucks !! That's why this is just so messed up and cruel !!

Imagine getting killed the exact way ur dreading for it to happen !

Like When Dean fianlly goes like "We gotta keep living Sammy" he really wanted to give this a shot !! He wanted to finally give it a shot for Cas and for himself! It's like he finally allowed himself to have hope !! Finally got his whole freaking free wil to do literally whatever he wanted !!!! He had a dog u know ! 😭 HE FREAKING APPLIED FOR A JOB !! FOR A JOB !! HE WAS GONNA GIVE THINGS OTHER THAN HUNTING A SHOT !! HE WANTED THIS !!

only to have him lose all of that !! all ripped away from him !! So yeah this is NOT JUST ANOTHER CHARACTER'S DEATH !!

He was so scared , he was freaking so scared and shaking "didn't think that this day would be today" he just wanted Sam close cuz he was so scared !! and u telling me that this is just another character's death!!

my baby boy , my comfort character deserved better !! I love him so much I can't-

i really thought Cas's death was bad (and it was hell tbh) but Dean's ending just messed me up in ways I can't even tell !

like he had to suffer too while dying !! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR !! Like ffs !!

this is literally depressing and so cruel !! And hopeless LIKE SO FUCKING HOPELESS !

he's been suffering his whole freaking life !! ALL HIS LIFE !!

and I know That he kinda got his peace at heaven (and tbh that might be the only thing that will help me go on with my life and the fact that Cas isn't in the empty too !) but that's just still doesn't make things right !! He freaking deserved a life !! HE FREAKING DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER !!

I just hate those writers so bad !

I will just end this with saying THANK U DEAN WINCHESTER , u've helped me thru alot !! u've changed me ❤️😭 ! Hope ur having all happiness u deserve at heaven baby boy ❤️😭😭

[im-some-lionheart]

as much as I love the girl boss move of Taylor re recording her old albums... Dear John TV really missed the mark

How am I supposed to cry to it while thinking about my best friend Dean Winchester when the hurt and anger isn't palpable through the speakers???