#lady roberta meserole

[catharsis-in-a-bottle]

transmasc vetinari fic is UP!!

featuring:

the icon herself, lady roberta meserole

downey thinking vetinari is a bastard but not because he's trans

rufus drumknott being another trans icon

vimes being vimes

vaguely formed play/script metaphors

mirrors

[helenvader]

First attempt at Lady Meserole and young Havelock.

[yeoldecryptid]

Headcanon: Roberta is that one family member everyone has who knows all the ways to remove any kind of stain from any kind of fabric. The really funky substances to use too, like milk or vinegar. Vetinari picked it up as a side effect from living with her his whole life, and whips the knowledge out of his back pocket when needed, leading to the inevitable response of ‘how do you know this???’

[mushroom-punk]

imagine being a cruel, paranoid tyrant ruling pretty successfully and then some rich lady from fantasy new orleans shows up and gets her weird goth gay teenage nephew to kill you

its been months since i finished it but the B plot of Night Watch will never stop being funny to me

[pratchettpatricianpages]

Five minutes later the Patrician was striding the length of the Oblong Office, fuming.

“They were laughing at me,” said the Patrician. “I could tell!”

“Did you suggest a working party?” said Wonse.

“Of course I did! It didn’t do the trick this time. You know, I really am inclined to increase the reward money.”

“I don’t think that would work, my lord. Any proficient monster slayer knows the rate for the job.”

“Ha! Half the kingdom,” muttered the Patrician.

“And your daughter’s hand in marriage,” said Wonse.

“I suppose an aunt isn’t acceptable?” the Patrician said hopefully.

“Tradition demands a daughter, my lord.”

The Patrician nodded gloomily.

-Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett

[rem-ir]

aunt Roberta probably didn’t even tell young Vetinari to call her “Madam.” He was probably just BORN formal like this guy I knew who was born to hippie parents and rebelled by becoming a strict Anglican in a three piece suit

[hermitmoss]

some of braigwen’s discworld playlists

thud! - margolotta and havelock

cinematic, choral, dramatic

a very unusual lady - margolotta

cinematic, dramatic, dark

secret lionheart - rufus drumknott

instrumental, soft, indie folk, quiet

hard-luck cases - sybil ramkin

pop, high, warm, empowering

del polis, per il polis - havelock vetinari

instrumental, dark, smooth, haunting

feel the city through my soles - sam vimes

80′s, rocking, upbeat

i was his guard i let him down - vetvimes

rock, mismatched, heartfelt

revolutionary woman - roberta meserole

smooth, dramatic, determined

you grabbed my hand (adorned in wildflower warpaint) - sybil and havelock

warm, rough, supportive

[megmahoneyart]

Inktober 20

Still...thinkin about The Night Watch.  (And I think the shadow politics going on qualify kind of for 20′s theme: Deep.  Or rather, I’m going to stretch the themes as far as I can to draw what I want)

[lallouette]

Ladies of Night Watch: Madame Roberta Meserole

[helenvader]

I can't! Another parallel! And such a wonderful one, too.

1. Sam and Sibyl (Men at Arms):

‘So just you run along. It’ll be terrific fun. Have you got a handkerchief?’

Vimes panicked.

‘What?’

‘Give it to me.’

She held it close to his mouth. ‘Spit …’ she commanded. She dabbed at a smudge on his cheek. One of the Interchangeable Emmas gave a giggle that was just audible. Lady Ramkin ignored it.

‘There,’ she said. ‘That’s better. Now off you go and keep the streets safe for all of us. And if you want to do something really useful, you could find Chubby.’

2. Havelock and Aunt Bobbi (Night Watch):

‘You’ve missed a bit,’ said the figure. It produced a lilac-coloured handkerchief and held it in front of the young man’s face. ��Spit,’ came the command.

Reluctantly, he did so. A hand wiped his cheek, and then held the cloth up to the light.

‘Dark green,’ said the woman. ‘How strange. I understand, Havelock, that you scored zero in your examination for stealthy movement.’

[ao3tageverything]

Night Watch - AO3 tagged

Rating Teen And Up Audiences Warnings Minor Character Death Fandoms Discworld Categories General

Characters Samuel Vimes, Fred Colon, Nobby Nobbs, Carrot Ironfoundersson, Carcer, Rosie Palm, Dr. John “Mossy” Lawn, Lu-Tze, Samuel Vimes (young version), Findthee Swing, Lady Roberta Meserole, Havelock Vetinari, Qu, Ned Coates

Additional Tags lilac, cop killer, commemoration day, visiting graves, mad murderer, storm, magical accident, time travel, Monks of History, mulitverse theory, wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff, impersonation, curfew, meeting your former self, secret police, craniometry, fledgling revolution, riots, booby traps, bamf!Vimes, the art of deescalation, build-up to big events, Sam Vimes whump, barricades, item connecting you with reality, changing history, torture chambers, torture victims, coup de grâce/mercy kill, arson, improvised weapon, The People’s Republic of Treacle Mine Road, hero worship, soldiers’ song, civil war, malicious use of ginger in body orifices, assassination, terror-induced heart attack, coup d'état, death by grapnel, violating amnesty, surprise attack, police-confiscated vehicle, improvised plumes, delayed major injury reaction, mêlée, berserk moment, the Glorious 25th of May, back to the future, disregarding one’s nudeness, difficult childbirth, beyond exhaustion, ... (spoilers after the jump)

not changing history (much) after all, resisting the beast inside, by-the-book arrest

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 3/? Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Mature Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari Characters: Lord Downey (Discworld), Havelock Vetinari, Roberta Meserole, Madam - Character, Rosemary "Rosie" Palm Additional Tags: stuff about aging, traveling in carriages when you're over eighty is hard on the joints, Vetinari's leg issues make appearances, some references to our favourite serial killer(s), Family Relationships - Freeform, are fun!, Madam POV, Vetinari POV, Downey POV Series: Part 5 of coveting desperate things Summary:

Madam fulfills her vague threat(?) to visit Vetinari after the serial killer business of the summer has been wrapped up. She is here to ask pointed questions, make insinuations, and to tell Vetinari to purchase a lint roller. Also, possibly, to meet Downey. For no particular reason at all. Havelock, dear, why are you making that face? Do desist. It's unattractive.

(as always, ratings/tags may change)

(no need to have read much of the previous series, to be fair)

-

Obgligatory Excerpt: 

Plants are very slow animals. But they can see and they can remember and they can speak and mimic and mock and tease and kill and save — which makes them, at the base level of things, not that different to humans.

Which made Downey fret, because if this holds even a small percentage as true, it means he’s been torturing his plants by forcing them into isolation of independent pots. He brought this to Lady T’Malia one day after a Parent-Teacher meeting when they were digesting the complaints of the latest Association with a brandy and a fag.

She suggested: First, you’re overreacting. Second, put them in bigger pots so they can share.

To which Downey primly replied: I am not overreacting. And I think I might give it a try. I talk to them, but if they communicate through roots then that does them little good. Anyway, I’m not sure they’re much interested in what I have to say.

T’Malia flicked buds out the office window. Said he had always been a strange one. But don’t worry, his secret is safe with her.

Downey has arrived everyone and you’ll be pleased to know that he’s being his Peak Nerd self. 

Also he and Madam have a Little Chat. 

[katemarley]

fanfiction: what everyone wants

Fandom: Discworld Pairing: Havelotta Characters: Havelock Vetinari, Lady Margolotta of Uberwald Rating: T

Summary: A young nobleman visits Lady Margolotta of Uberwald on his Grand Sneer. She finds him quite … interesting.

Also available on AO3 and ffnet (see the links in my profile).

---

“You have freedom, Mister Vimes. Isn’t that vhat everyvun vants?” —Margolotta in The Fifth Elephant

---

“It seems,” said Lady Margolotta, staring at the board in front of her, “that you have beaten me.”

She was still working out how that could have happened. The pale young man in front of her had been losing, for H—for someone’s sake!

Then again, this was exactly the point when you played Stealth Chess: If the Assassin piece entered the Slurks to either side as the chessboard and made a few moves there, it could reappear practically anywhere on the board. And the young man, she reminded herself, was a trained assassin.

“So it seems.” The young man didn’t smile, which was, Margolotta thought, fortunate for him because gleeful winners tended to get on her nerves—and the blue veins under his skin were shimmering rather enticingly.

“Even so…”

“Hmm?” Her eyes shifted from his carotid to his face.

“I would feel honoured if your ladyship graced me with the opportunity of a return match.” He smiled. He had a calculating smile, this young man.

“Vhy? You have already von.”

“Yes, but I might not the next time.”

Now he had her undivided attention.

“Our match was even,” he said simply. “This was the most interesting game of Stealth Chess I have played in a long time, and we play it often in the Assassins’ Guild.” Now he smiled a real smile. “One might say we are a match for each other, as opponents.”

“Hmm.” Margolotta watched him more closely. He wasn’t conventionally attractive: A gangly young man with a long face and shoulder-length black hair … but with pale skin and clearly visible veins—features that were certainly attractive to a vampire. And he got along well with her dog.

In short, he was a temptation. A temptation sent not by any unknown deity, but by her friend, his aunt Lady Roberta Meserole, who had asked him to pay her a visit on his Grand Sneer. It would have been quite impolite to sink her fangs into—

Oh, well. Better not follow that train of thought.

---

“My sources are a little vague on the matter, but it seems you had to flee Ankh-Morkpork because you inhumed Lord Vinder?”

The young man was sitting in her library, several books of Uberwaldean philosophy on the table in front of him. Margolotta watched him closely in case the twitching of a brow or, indeed, the speeding up of his pulse revealed the truth of this allegation.

“Oh no, I did not inhume him,”[1] the young man said without any sign of surprise. “However, Lord Snapcase watches every younger member of the Assassins’ Guild quite closely at the moment. Rumour has it that he wants to invite the assassin who … predeceased his predecessor in order to congratulate him, but I would not bet my travelling cloak on his true intentions.”

“Indeed not,” Margolotta said thoughtfully.

“You never know what a tyrant who compiles registers might do with them,” the young man continued in an equally thoughtful tone, looking directly into her eyes. “The existence of a register means that the aforementioned tyrant now knows my name and address. I thought it wisest not to be there, in case he thought a … reduction of the number of assassins in Ankh-Morpork was due.”

“Visely said,” Margolotta had to admit. “Perhaps not so vise to go to Ubervald, though.”

“Oh, several of my teachers at the Guild recommended Uberwaldean philosophers to me,” the young man said. “I thought reading their works might broaden my understanding of politics and its underlying principles.”

“It seems you have come to the right place, then.” Margolotta gestured around at the high-vaulted room. With its chairs and ladders leading to a second storey with even more books, it resembled the library of a cloister rather than that of a castle.

“Indeed, I believe I have.” The young man turned to one of the books on the table. “I found some of the statements in Die Bedingtheit der Werte by Friedhelm Niklas quite enlightening, especially the passage in which he emphasises that the powerful and the wealthy define what is ‘good’, and usually define that they are ‘the good ones’ themselves.”[2]

“Ah, is that not a universal truth?” said Margolotta. “There are no good people at all, only people vho claim to be the good ones.”

“Oh yes,” said the young man. “Not long ago, I watched a play in which one of the characters said: There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.[3] That seems entirely correct to me.”

“Vell,” said Margolotta, “In my experience, there are, alvays and only, the bad people. It is just that some of them are on opposite sides.”[4]

The young man turned to her, books forgotten. There was an alertness in his expression that drew her closer. He pulled out a chair for her.

“Do tell me more.”

---

“Such a pity you have to go.” Margolotta stepped behind the young man with superhuman speed. She expected him to flinch, but there was nothing—nothing but the suggestion that he might have moved away if only he had wanted to. But he remained standing, and his pulse did not speed up.

“Yes,” he said. “I quite enjoyed my stay at your place.”

“I only vonder,” she said, lifting her chin to bring her lips closer to his neck, “vhat makes you believe I vould let you go.”

And there it was, the quickening of a pulse.

“I trust that you will let me go,” he said, “and that you will not harm me.”

“Oh, but you don’t,” she whispered close to his ear. “You are afraid.”

“As a matter of fact, your ladyship, I am not.”

“I can hear your pulse.”

“I am aware.” He paused. “You can also smell people’s fear, I am told. Can you smell fear?”

She hesitated. There was no fear.

She closed her mouth and brushed her lips against his pulse point.

He shuddered, barely perceptible. Margolotta only noticed because she had been waiting for it.

“Interesting.” She stepped back.

“Of course I cannot know if you feel the same—if that is, indeed, what vampires feel,” he said, “but I do believe that you will not try to subdue me.”

“Oh, and vhy is that?” With lightning speed, she stepped to his side. He did not flinch this time either.

“Because you were the first person in years who challenged my skills when we played Stealth Chess,” he said. “Because some of the most interesting conversations of my life so far were with you.” He paused. “There will be no more if you subdue me.”

Margolotta stared into his eyes.

“An intelligent young man indeed.”

“So I am told.” He smiled. “Your ladyship, it was an honour to meet you.” He took her hand and bowed deeply, breathing a kiss on her hand.

“May ve meet again, Havelock Vetinari,” she said solemnly.

“I hope we will, Lady Margolotta. I hope we will.”

He mounted his horse. She watched him ride through the gates of her castle.

He was right, of course. She would never subdue someone like him, tempting as it might be.

“Thall I clothe the gateth, mithtreth?” said Igor, appearing right behind her in the way only Igors could.

“Yes, close them, please.” She turned back to her castle. Quietly, she added: “And I shall spend the evening asking myself if vampires can feel the same…”

“Mithtreth?”

“Nothing, Igor. Nothing.”

---

Notes

I was listening to “Freiheit” (Freedom) by Saltatio Mortis and it gave me quite the Havelotta feels… You can find the German lyrics and an English translation on lyricstranslate. 

---

[1] Lady Margolotta might have received a more accurate answer had she asked if he had had anything to do with Lord Winder’s death, but as matters stand, giving someone a heart attack does not mean inhuming them in accord with Assassins’ Guild statutes.

[2] Paraphrased from Zur Genealogie der Moral by Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche.

[3] Written by a certain Discworld playwright named Hwel.

[4] Quoted almost verbatim from Guards! Guards!

[littlesmartart]

DRAWTOBER #20 - Ladies Who Organise by reckonedrightly

“A woman,” Roberta Meserole had said once, lighting a long black cigarette with a silver lighter, “hides in plain sight. Visibility, Haveline, is our most important asset—”

She looked up. Around. 

“Haveline,” she said, “that is not funny.” 

--- 

or, how Ankh-Morpork acquired its first female Patrician very, very quietly.

I don’t ship ‘em romantically any more but you know how it is... make it gay and Bitch, That’s Love. a really nice, interesting exploration of what could have been if vetinari was a woman. I honestly can’t remember the last time I drew margolotta in her pre-league tropey vampire days, so that was fun. though vetinari looks more... feminine than I imagined despite me trying to keep the design as close as possible to my normal young!vetinari design. today has been A Lot though so tbh I’m just proud I managed to get this done. an excellent fic guys, please check it out. 

[sayitwithsarcophilus]

All-POC Discworld Fancast

I was doing another Discworld fancasting and noticed I was choosing a lot of actors of color anyway, so I decided to run with it.

Havelock Vetinari: Naveen Andrews or Mahershala Ali

Sam Vimes: Don Cheadle

Lady Sybil: Queen Latifah

Carrot Ironfoundersson: Alfred Enoch

Angua: Dichen Lachman or Marisa Quinn

Fred Colon: Michael Peña

Sally Von Humpeding: Chloe Bennet or Rihanna

William de Worde: Lin-Manuel Miranda

Sacharissa Cripslock: Gugu Mbatha-Raw

CMOT Dibbler: John Leguizamo

Granny Weatherwax: Cicely Tyson or Tsai Chin

Nanny Ogg: Loretta Devine or Nichelle Nichols

Younger Esme Weatherwax: Abena Ayivor or Lucy Liu

Younger Gytha Ogg: Octavia Spencer

Magrat: Melissa Fumero

Agnes Nitt: Amber Riley

Mightily Oats: Riz Ahmed

King Verence II: Danny Pudi

71-Hour Ahmed: Samuel L Jackson or Danny Trejo

Tiffany Aching: Quvenzhane Wallis

Moist von Lipwig: Michael B Jordan or Leslie Odom Jr.

Adora Belle Dearheart: Stephanie Beatriz or Arden Cho

Mustrum Ridcully: Laurence Fishburne

Ponder Stibbons: Richard Ayoade

Glenda Sugarbean: Gabourey Sidibe

Lady Roberta Meserole: Alfre Woodard

Igor (all of them): Rami Malek with a lot of stage makeup

Susan Sto Helit: Jessica Williams

Conina: Ciara

Miss Rosemary Palm: Jessica Parker Kennedy

Polly Perks: Samira Wiley

Maledict(a): Chynna Ortaleza

Pteppic of Djelibeybi: Rami Malek

And James Earl Jones as the voice of DEATH.

Raul Julia would have been my choice for Otto Chriek if I hadn’t been restricting myself to living performers.

[squadron-of-damned]

Discworld headcanon

The Vetinari family is actually a rather minor noble house from Genova. Then there is the Meserole family which is Morporkian and they are merchants. Vetinaris happened to have a son, let's call him Christian (why not?) and ol' Meserole had two daughters Roberta and... Amelia (Amelia is a nice name, stop complaining). Lord Christian Vetinari and Miss Amelia Meserole got married and had a son whom they for an unknown reason named Havelock. Poor Amelia was feeling lonely in Genova, knowing only her husband there and so her sister moved in to keep her company and eventually get married too (also she wanted to stay close to Christian on whom she totally had a crush). However Lord Ch. and Lady A. Vetinari both died die to unexplained and untold reasons (Lilith Weatherwex coming to Genova maybe?) and little Havelock had to be raised by his aunt.