#legend of eli monpress

[elimicu]

If I think of a way to make Nicos manacles I can do a wardrobe cosplay how I imagine her

Sadly I don't have a cloak (we should normilize wearing cloaks in public, they look so comfy!)

[camthecatchameleon]

Me when i say “it’s yappin’ time” and yap all over the place

(The Legend of Eli Monpress AU edition) @thefandommind

Essentially this AU is a rewrite of the story if Josef had been recalled to Osera earlier and never met Eli or Nico prior to the events of the series.

In this AU I imagine that Eli, Nico, and Miranda would have met in Mellinor and similar we-have-to-save-Mellinor events occur, allowing for Miranda to make her pact with the Great Spirit.

The thing that got me really thinking about this AU is scenes of Eli and Nico’s relationship when Josef isn’t around. Which are scarce. Because Nico is heavily dependent on Josef and Eli has (had) a lot of unintentional prejudice towards demonseeds. They just don’t interact a lot in the series, but when they do I eat that shit UPPPP

Without Josef as a buffer, when Eli and Nico meet they’d haaate each other. Eli’s bad at being a partner in crime without taking advantage of her abilities, and Nico doesn’t understand Eli’s fixation on his bounty because they don’t talk about their trauma. They shut up about the past and just focus on thrilling heists, which works and they do have a bond, but there’s lingering animosity that erupts in arguments and sometimes physical fights.

And yet they don’t have anyone else. Nico was saved by Eli after she was ejected from the mountains. She doesn’t have anywhere else to go. Eli can’t do this on his own for long, and he desperately needs to keep doing this. He can’t go back.

They’d have a very toxic codependent relationship with Karon as the fed-up middle man who never says anything because he can’t be bothered.

Josef would have gone out to be a swordsman, received the Heart, and lived as a bounty hunter for a short while. He would have encountered Eli a couple of times, but of course he never caught the thief. He was quickly recalled to Osera due to his mother’s health and quickly had to take over, marry Adela, etc. Leanette and Adela, not expecting Josef to return so soon, have to reconsider their plans and formulate new ones. It would be so easy to just kill him now, but how would they retain their position? Adela hasn’t had enough time to foster the strong image she was aiming for, they still don’t trust her, and now the King is back.

(I’ve got a very hyperspecific headcanon that explains why they would theoretically not have kids but there’s nothing in canon that backs it lmao)

The fic I have in mind follows the book 1 format in which Eli gets himself caught and then steals the king of Osera to increase his bounty. Except the king is Josef.

I’ve got this vision of Josef interrogating Eli and Eli flirting with him because they’ve met before and Eli likes to annoy people. 

Nico knocks Josef out while he’s distracted talking to Eli, snaps at Eli for taking too much time, Eli rolls his eyes but gets himself out of the cell they threw him in, and they take off with the king and make shelter in a shack somewhere. 

Eli, knowing Josef’s history as a bounty hunter, would offer to whisk Josef away from his kingdom indefinitely. Josef obviously refuses, but has to admit to himself that the offer is enticing. He feels a sense of responsibility to his kingdom, of course he does. But he’s never felt connected to the Throne of Iron Lions. He’s no leader, he’s a swordsman pretending to be a king. The people don’t like him, the council and Adela do most of the work and public appearances. 

The Heart has long since gone quiet, and Josef wonders idly when it will find a new wielder. He wonders why hasn’t it left already?

Eventually after some introspection and conversation with Nico, Josef would reluctantly agree to be permanently kidnapped by the Famous Eli Monpress. If they send people out looking for him, well. How would they find him? They’re searching for a tied-up king, not a scruffy, scarred man with too many swords travelling with thieves and looking more content than he’s been in years.

[thefandommind]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Legend of Eli Monpress - Rachel Aaron Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Josef Liechten/Nico, Eli Monpress/Josef Liechten/Nico Characters: Josef Liechten, Eli Monpress, Nico (Eli Monpress) Additional Tags: Missing Scene, Open to Interpretation, Pre-Relationship, Post Benehime, Set End Of Spirit End, Caring Eli Monpress Summary:

The first thing to interrupt Josef's blissful unconsciousness was the temperature.

Just enough of a chill that clung to his skin, slowly pulling him from his sleep.

Or, Josef wakes up after the end of the world and finds a clingy thief.

[deadmountaindaughter]

hey so if there are any bored eli monpress fans seeing this you should check out Beware the Villainess, it's an isekai that somehow has an insanely high number of similarities to tloem and i've been having a lot of fun. they have their own benehime and everything. and if there are any BtV fans then you should totally read the Legend of Eli Monpress our fandom is way too small

[roseunspindle]

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11754293-the-legend-of-eli-monpress

[flyincakecow]

Good sir, would you please draw Nico's identical copy of Josef's penis? And what she could possibly be doing with it?

I’d like to point out that I was in fact correct in my assumptions

I will not fall for your tricks you fiend

Take your penis on penis crime now SCRAM

[haveyoureadthisfantasybook]

vote yes if you have finished the entire book.

vote no if you have not finished the entire book.

(faq · submit a book)

[reginleif-valkyrie]

The Legend of Eli Monpress

I have a feeling this won’t get answered, but how old is Nico?

I could see her small size being contributed to her demon seed and I know some adult women that aren’t very tall, but the fact she’s referred to as ‘girl’ while Miranda is ‘woman’ makes me think Nico is a child or maybe a preteen at best.

The only time Eli, Josef, and Miranda are called boy/girl is by an older character usually to remind them who’s ‘superior’ or who’s in charge.

If I remember right, Pele is referred to as a teen at least once.

Nico’s not. Her description is always ‘girl’.

[alittledarkalittlegloom]

was just curious

[hollowistheworld]

Freedom of the Seas

For AURoulette2023, hosted by @astriiformes. It was supposed to be 'favorite historical era' but I don't know if it counts as a historical au with this much fantasy injected into it. But in my defense, Eli works really well as a magical pirate!

Also on AO3

Gin rested his chin and his front paws along the side of the boat and let out a miserable sigh. “I hate the water.” 

Miranda set a hand between his ears. “I know. Not much longer now.” 

“You said that a week ago.” 

She tugged lightly at one of his ears. She had, that was true, but pointing out that their quarry was proving harder to catch that anticipated was neither helpful nor appreciated. “Eli can’t run forever.” 

“He can, actually,” Gin retorted. “The ocean is very big.” 

Miranda couldn’t deny that. It hadn’t seemed so large on her maps, when she’d first accepted the message to hunt Eli to ground. But not only was she about to go crazy for want of the sight of dry land, it seemed that Eli Monpress never docked, or at least not for longer than it took his first mate to resupply. No shore leave for the crew of Home, it seemed. She didn’t understand how they hadn’t mutinied. 

She barely understood how she hadn’t mutinied, and this was her expedition. She couldn’t decide if she disliked the unrelenting beat of sunlight glinting off the water or the brutality of the storms more. She was either wet or hot, and sometimes she was both. And she couldn’t even commiserate with Gin, who was equally uncomfortable and also seasick.

“Ship off starboard!” a voice shouted from the crow’s nest. Miranda straightened, hope and adrenaline rushing into her at equal speeds. 

Gin barked and dropped down to all fours, hackles raising. 

Miranda leaned forward, gripping the rail, searching for the ship. 

Instead, she found fog, rolling in quick and silent. 

There had been no fog in sight when the lookout had called out. By the time Miranda’s focus had moved to the horizon, the deck was covered in it. Thicker and thicker, blotting out the sun, then darkening the ship until it could have been night. The crow’s nest disappeared from view, then the bow, then the very railing Miranda was standing against. 

“I would say I’m flattered,” said a charming, cocky voice from within the fog, “to have another hunter sent after me so quickly, but you aren’t even making it a challenge. Not a single cannon shot before I made it on board? Really?” 

Miranda had never met Eli, but it had to be him. Charming and cocky summed up every report she’d ever read about him, and odd weather patterns had come up plenty - though she hadn’t expected so much fog so quickly. 

She leaned toward Gin, her fingers gripping his fur so she wouldn’t lose him - she couldn’t even make out her own feet anymore. “Can you get us to their ship?” she asked, voice pitched so low she was barely speaking at all. A human standing on her feet wouldn’t have been able to hear, but that was one of the many advantages of working with Gin instead of with a human. 

Gin didn’t respond aloud. They didn’t know enough about Eli’s crew, what his abilities were, what he had aboard, if someone would be able to understand him, or to recognize his growls for what they were. 

Instead, Miranda felt his muscles tense under her fingers and then they were leaping through the darkness, landing with a soft thump on another deck.

“Thank you for your help,” Eli said, flashing the mist his most winning smile, despite the fact they couldn’t appreciate it. That was no reason not to be polite. “You just let me know if you need anything in return.” 

The mist bid a polite farewell, including an affectionate ruffle through his hair, and rolled away. Within a minute, the sunlight was back, as bright and cheerful as if there had never been a cloud in the sky. 

Eli turned to Nico and Josef and clapped his hands together with a broad grin. “Well, I think that went spectacularly!” 

“Not much of a fight,” Josef grumbled. “That was pathetic.” 

“Yes, yes, they don’t make bounty hunters like they used to, I know. Nico, how much did we get?”

“A thousand standards.” 

“Really? That’s it?” 

She shrugged, apparently not sharing his distress. “It’s a bounty hunter ship that hasn’t caught its bounty yet.” 

“I think we have, actually,” said a new voice. 

Eli froze for a moment. The advantage of having two crewmen and a semi-living ship was that there were never any surprises on board, never any new people with unknown motivations. 

But now there was a furious and triumphant looking red-haired woman standing beside the main mast with an enormous dog at her side. Somehow, the dog looked triumphant as well, and more than a little bit smug. 

“Ah,” Eli said. “I thought that bounty hunter ship was a little too easy. Have they resorted to tricks then?” 

“That’s rich, coming from you, Monpress. I’m not tricking the weather into committing crimes.” 

“I am not tricking anyone. And weather spirits don’t care what rules you’ve slapped around the world. I ask them for a storm or a rush of fog and as long as I ask nicely, they’re happy to oblige.” 

The enormous dog let out a deep, grumbling noise and stepped forward. A moment later, Eli realized why. Nico had moved around and toward them, obviously intending to make a move to get their uninvited guests off the ship, and the dog had noticed. Nico looked it over, her expression calculating, and turned her head slightly toward Eli. 

He shook his head. “What, exactly, is your plan here, Ms…?” 

“Miranda Lyonette. And my plan is to wake up your ship, have it beach itself on the next bit of dry land it gets near, and have my still intact team of bounty hunters come pick you up.” 

“Told you,” Josef said. “Too easy.” 

“You always say it’s too easy. You can’t fault me for not listening anymore.” 

“You never listened to begin with,” Nico said. 

“Hush.”

“Where’s the rest of your crew?” Miranda asked, looking around, one hand on her dog’s back, obviously braced for a fight. 

“This is it,” Eli said, sweeping out his arms to encompass his two friends and the deck of Home itself. “Josef, Nico, and Home. I take it you haven’t actually tried to talk to Home yet? Because she’s very much awake already, and I don’t think she’ll be very interested in sticking herself in the sand.” 

A flicker of uncertainty passed over Miranda’s face and Eli grinned. His grin broadened when the flicker vanished again - he loved an opponent that wouldn’t roll over and be done with it. It kept life exciting. 

He could do without the big dog and its big teeth though. He wasn’t really a dog person, and one that big was worse than most. 

The deck pitched under their feet. 

“The bounty hunters are chasing us again,” Home said. 

“Your friends have a lot of faith in you,” Eli said to Miranda, whose face was tight and serious, weighing up her options as she reworked her plan with the knowledge that Home wasn’t going to be turning on him. He hoped she didn’t just throw in the towel and have her dog paddle them back to the bounty hunter ship. That would be no fun at all. 

“They know I’m good at my job,” Miranda said coolly. 

Eli grinned. “Are you now? How many criminals have you managed to catch on these seas? You look a bit sunburned, Ms. Lyonette. Typically the sign of a rookie.” 

She straightened further, which was impressive, since her back had already been as straight as a pole. Eli’s smile stretched wider. “That’s what I thought.” 

“You aren’t getting away from me,” she said. “Your flashy tricks aren’t going to be enough.” 

“Flashy tricks?” Eli cupped a hand around his mouth. “If anyone could give me a strong wind heading south, it would be greatly appreciated!” 

A moment later the wind sped up, faster and faster, until they were speeding south, Home laughing all around them. 

Miranda jumped a little at the sudden speed, but otherwise looked unimpressed. Her dog huffed. 

“I wouldn’t call that a flashy trick,” Eli said smugly. 

“I would.” Miranda and the dog stepped back to the ship’s railing. Miranda held out a hand. “Mellinor?” 

Water rushed out of her, down the side of the ship and around the rudder. 

Home stopped with an offended noise. The sails reached for the south, pushed along by the wind. Water, a lighter blue than the ocean was supposed to be, bubbled around the water and pulled it north, back toward the bounty hunter ship. 

“I prefer to do this in a way that doesn’t rip your ship in half,” Miranda said. “Especially since she is fully alive and awake. But you will be coming back with me in handcuffs.” 

Eli crossed his arms over his chest. “I will not.” 

“I don’t plan on giving you a choice.” 

Josef drew one of his swords and took a step, apparently unfazed by the growling of Miranda’s dog. Nico stepped closer to Eli. “Her water’s loyal to her,” she said out of the side of her mouth. “Attacking her will make it dig in more.” 

Eli’s mouth pulled up. “Well, alright then, Miranda. I guess things are going to get interesting.” 

[elimicu]

I always find it interesting how when reading a book different people imagine the characters voices differently.

For me Nico sounds like Scylla from the song Scylla by Epic the musical, especially at the end of the song where the voice harmonizes. But when she talks I imagine her voice softer and quieter

And Eli sounds like the main character from Doctor who, I don't have an explanation for that one

[thefandommind]

I have questions about the logistics of the firebird, jade horse, and sand centipede from that one scene in Spirit Rebellion. Because why are they like that, is the spiritualist guiding them into that shape with their will? Did the spirit decide fuck it, we're a bird now, I will fly. Like a bonfire spirit being different from a typical fire, and chemical fires being their own thing, sure. But why is that fire a bird, and why is that hunk of jade a horse, and why does the sand need so many legs.

Also how old did y'all think Marion from Spirit Thief was, did y'all read her as a teen, or young woman. Cus I've seen both types of people interpreting her and Miranda's interactions as sweet female friendship, and sweet budding queers.

My Miranda is a bisexual woman kisser so I'm biased.

[deadmountaindaughter]

have not watched berserk but my understanding is that guts berserk is Josef Liechten if he were WEAK

[thefandommind]

Hell fucking yeah dude

Gin!  One of my favs from the Eli Monpress series by Rachel Aaron.

He’s basically this giant magical racing dog and, having owned greyhounds in the past, I can confirm that they are Mostly Nose.  I imagine his expressions are pretty amazing as a result (seen here are disgruntled glowering, quizzical glowering and default glowering).

[reginleif-valkyrie]

The Legend of Eli Monpress

Who’s going to tell Eli he sounds like a jealous boyfriend when he gets mad at Josef for worrying about Nico?

‘It’s Nico this and Nico that’

Dude, seriously, chill. 🤣

To be fair, I was shipping them before I even started the series.

[omophagic-beast]

What is your Hogwarts house?

Hi! Im gonna assume this is in good faith once, and answer this by saying that im a trans man and have fully disconnected from harry potter because theyre bad books and jk rowling sucks if youd like to read something better id love to recommend some stuff! The Legend of Eli Monpress by Rachel Aaron is a series I like enough to put a quote from it on my arm, though I still hesitate to call it my favorite. It's about the greatest thief in the world as he tries to get his bounty as high as possible, accompanied by a swordsman wielding a mountain and a woman hosting the seed of a demon. The Keys to the Kingdom series by Garth Nyx was recommended to me by the lovely Jay Dragon and a few others at Metatopia this year, and I ended up devouring four of the seven books on the plane ride home. A child unwillingly goes through The Horrors, fighting seven angels who have been overtaken (in a sense) by the seven deadly sins. There's so much cool and interesting symbology throughout the series that's really fun to pick out when you notice it. Delicious in Dungeon is a manga by Ryoko Kui and definitely my favorite manga of all time. It's mainly about the importance of good food, as a group of adventurers end up having to traverse a dungeon with no supplies, surviving by eating the monsters within.

The Seep by Chana Porter is fun, if you're willing to get weird with it. Trina Goldberg-Oneka, a trans woman, finds herself devastated and unmoored after her wife leaves her to become a baby again. And by "fun" I mean it's a book that left me feeling like I was more of a person than I was before.

There's also plenty of really good webcomics out there, like Sakana, Bicycle Boy, Pia and The Tiny Little Things, A Better Place, We Go Together, Barbarous, Cold Sweat, ect, that you can simply find and read for free online! And if you simply must have wizards may I suggest making your own, the blog There's a TTRPG for that has a great post listing a bunch of good ttrpgs with that theme: https://theresattrpgforthat.tumblr.com/post/718030523649376256/theme-magic-and-mystics And speaking of games I'll cap this all off, for no particular reason, by recommending the game Let's Rob RJ McElhenny and Steal Her Golden Quill by Glaive Guisarme Games. It's fun and campy and a really good time.