#mainly bc I want to get these out BEFORE I do a rewatch

[quillyfied]

Okay next batch of episode thoughts that I don’t know that I can expand into real coherent thoughts so heck it we’re doing it live and cramming them together, no chronology just memory vibes, PART TWO:

- “that’s six inches of silver in your scapula” MADAM.

- They’re doing an amazing job of showing Izzy in a pure pathetic state. I still have a lot of conflicted emotions about him but his increased confidence and ease around the ship BECAUSE the crew is taking time to be kind to him is…it’s. I don’t. GOLD UNICORN LEG OKAY. THE CARE THEY ARE SHOWING HIM AND HE DOES NOT DESERVE IT AND HE KNOWS IT AND HE BELIEVES IT BUT IT IS CHANGING HIM FOR THE BETTER ANYWAY.

- once again my expectations are being undercut. Of course Buttons isn’t the rabbit. Silly of me to think that. Of course he isn’t going to screw up turning into a seagull. He’s Buttons.

- …he’s coming back, though, right?? Guys Buttons is coming back at some point, right????

- Hang on have to go giggle about Izzy dragging himself across the floor mumbling existential horrors and shouting at the unicorn and then barking at people knocking on his door.

- Also have to giggle about the two halves of the crew coming at each other trying to help in two different ways and talking it through on their own, without Stede’s direct interference. I’m so proud of them.

- Wee John might just be slowly transforming into a mermaid. And I want his sweater.

- Ed referring to himself and the rabbit as lone wolves but immediately imprinting on the thing—and it not leaving him, either.

- HES SCARED OF SPIDERS

- How instantly Ed is glad to see Mary and Anne though. And the secret handshake with Anne. I cry.

- I also cry over how Anne instantly smells blood in the water with Stede before even knowing his connection to Ed.

- Like I guess Buttons not coming back makes sense bc he gave the most profound advice of the entire show and then flew off as a seagull, thereby completing his life’s dream, but have they considered the fact that I will miss him.

- (And so will the crew)

- I love that Ed and Stede finally have it out and get to a point where they can start to heal. I also find it so interesting to see the difference in what the fandom thought would be important to bring up, and what the show itself seems important to bring up. Stede could have blamed Badminton for his cowardice, but he doesn’t; he owns it and makes a greater stride towards mending things with Ed and being better himself. Ed could have mentioned what Izzy said to him, but instead he’s starting to work at the greater issue of his own self-loathing and how that drove him to harming the crew. It’s entirely possible that those details will come up later, but. I think Izzy has a point when he says it’s better to patch things with fiction (or silence) than never moving on. And maybe the hashing out of this stuff belongs to fanfic, not to canon. Because the events themselves don’t matter so much to canon as does what those events represented and THAT is what is getting fixed and addressed.

- Mary Read’s whole thing about “this is what an adult relationship looks like.” I have so many conflicted personal feelings about it. The summary: never been in a romantic relationship before and now at an age where I’ve witnessed plenty but I’m terrified of how I’ll be if and when that ever happens for me, bc the only experiences I’ve got is watching others and fiction. And I just was listening to both my mom and sister in law talking about how so many women my sil’s age have gotten divorced bc their expectations for what a marriage is were unrealistic, how marriage is more like a business transaction. And I was too scared to ask for clarification at the time. And I really do wonder if Mary has a point, yknow. When the mystery fades and the magic is gone…what’s left? Bc fiction tells us one thing. Real life often tells another. Dying alone doesn’t sound fun but it sounds better than accidentally ruining my and/or someone else’s life based on a false hope, yknow?

- Anyway that’s way too personal time to move on

- TO ANNE SETTING THEIR STIFLING LIFE ABLAZE AND REALLY REKINDLING THAT ROMANCE WITH MARY. HELL YEAH LADIES GET IT.

- I know it’s never gonna be addressed but please can the satanic ship be addressed at some point, even as a throwaway line

- (Also patiently awaiting the literal translation of what the dying priest was saying)

- PUT STEDE BACK IN FINE FABRICS 1717

- The absolute ball you know they were all having with this episode. Rhys Darby your FACE when screaming at Izzy after he reiterates that it’s cursed.

- Just the sheer hope in Ed’s face as he witnesses Buttons(?) fly away, as he submits to the jumpsuit and cat bell, the enthusiasm with which he jumps in to go fishing with Fang. The man is going through it but I love seeing him so earnest

- LUCIUS THO. SO MANY THOUGHTS. First and foremost I want his outfit this season, forget Stede’s cursed suit for a minute let’s talk about how Lucius is SERVING this season (and why it’s making me more hopeful for ABBA on the soundtrack at some point)

- How Pete gets through to him by pointing out that HE LIVED BITCH. TALK ABOUT A PERSPECTIVE CHANGE. Also the various blackbeard doodles I’m dying

- Izzy turning the tables on Lucius. I love a good parallel.

- Pete tho. Marry the F out of that man, Lu, he’s a keeper.

- “Loner artsy types” EXPLAIN CALICO JACK TO ME

- AND ALSO I NEED NAMES AND DESCRIPTIONS OF THESE OTHER ARTSY LONER TYPES

- Fang is such a wonderful character and we are so blessed to have him. I was a little wary that Fang was going to try and off (or offload) Ed just to make the crew feel better, but what we got was so much softer and better. Teaching Ed in such a gentle and honest way to examine himself! To sit with himself and learn to value the company! Telling Ed that he’s been crossing boundaries for a long time and giving Ed space to apologize and process! HIS NAME IS KEVIN AND IT’S A FOUR HUNDRED YEAR OLD TRADITION.

- Listen. Listen. Listen. Shirtless Con O’Niell is. A gift. That shirtlessness belonging to the character of Izzy is a little more of a conflict for me but given that Izzy has entered his “little shit and owning it” phase, I’m inclined to enjoy it.

- Also the SHEER BALLS on Stede Bonnet to manipulate Izzy into teaching him some piracy bits. That little stutter when Izzy tries to act unaffected but still asks what Blackbeard said about him. I’m just. Omg.

- And the way Stede sucks at the practicality but he excels at the instinctive/emotional bits. How he’s so creative and genuine and absolutely won his crew’s respect and loyalty and continues to prove that he’s worth it. I ADORE Stede Bonnet.

- Okay I gotta I gotta I gotta: KISS NUMBER TWOOOOOOO. I’ve only kissed one person in my time so far but I remember the moment after that initial dam break, when it occurred to me that I was allowed to kiss this person again; something about the casual way Ed and Stede both lean in just feels the same way to me. Like this is their new normal and they like it. And ADORE Ed setting a boundary and Stede immediately respecting it. AND. THE FINGERS. THE PLAYING. Comparing their games to what Anne and Mary get up to, it does make me hopeful that a mature relationship can be comfortable and playful and sweet and not just a grind or a business transaction. Idk man.

- Now I fully forgot that the episodes have post credits scenes so my reactions to them are not included here but I’ll be rewatching all five episodes later tonight so maybe a separate little baby post about them later.

[chaotictomtom]

NEED to go to sleep rn but ive finished my bcs rewatch earlier today and started to rewatch brba and.....seething by how much i despise big baby bastard man. hoping to punch him in my dreams.

[liyawritesss]

ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴜᴇʟ

-> synopsis: you've never dueled before, despite being in the presence of dueling legends. what happens when they decide to teach you? do you fold under the pressure, or do you show your teacher who's the real master of duel monsters?

-> pairing: yugi moto | jaden yuki | yusei fudo + black!gn!reader

-> from: yu-gi-oh! abridged, yu-gi-oh! gx, yu-gi-oh! 5ds

-> contains: can be read as either platonic or romantic, ot3 protags, 2nd person ('you', 'your', 'yours')

-> a/n: I've been rewatching yugioh and as always I fall in love with this show all over again - it was a pivotal show in my childhood that'll always hold a special place in my heart. this really came abt bc I was thinking of yusei....yeah he's my lil yeah yeah 🫶🏾 we got mad history. okay, anyway, hope you guys enjoy!

-> join my taglist!

-> tags: @mbakuetshurisprincess @shuriszn @writingintheshadowsforever @cafehyunji @niyahwrites @marsfunzon22 @briology @asensitivecookie @moon-bo-young @flo-milli-shit-hoe @romiantic @shuinami @badass-dora-milaje @uranometrias @elvenxwarrior

yugi moto

-> yugi would jump at the opportunity to teach you how to duel. at this point, it stands as one of his love languages, so expect him to be a bit giddy about it.

-> one day after classes he brings you to the game shop and his grandpa can immediately tell from the smile on his face that it's you that has him this happy. after introducing you to him, yugi asks if his grandpa has any starter decks you can use to learn with. as grandpa moto goes to search for one, yugi takes the opportunity to point out certain cards on display, telling you about their mechanics and histories as if he's an expert on them. you note how animated he gets about them and it's honestly so cute how passionate he is; it even gets you pumped up a little.

-> grandpa moto hands off the started deck and the two of you retreat to the upstairs unit and to his room. once settled, he starts laying down the ground rules, showing you the basics with his own deck before starting up a practice duel. At certain points he'll show you different ways you can play strategies to get the best outcome, coaching you until you get the hang of it. yugi let's you make mistakes on your own but points them out so that you don't end up doing them again.

-> he's the kind of teacher to walk you through things carefully - not necessarily hold your hand the entire way, but he knows it can be intimidating to be thrown in on the deep end with no support, so he takes his time. it takes a couple days of coming over to his place and practicing with the spare deck until most of the rules and basics stick to your brain, and pretty soon, you gain the confidence to duel him without his guidance, and even in school during lunch or down time in front of people (youd been previously embarrased to do so bc of your amateurity)

-> honestly, seeing you grow comfortable with dueling and loving the game just as much as him makes him admire like you ten times more. the disappointment he feels when you beat him is quickly replaced, if it wasn't feigned all along, with a sense of pride that this is the very unique and special connection he has with you, and he definitely cherishes it.

jaden yuki

-> so like.....if you want to learn *seriously* how to duel, don't go to this guy. jaden's whole shtick is having fun and feeling the adrenaline that comes with dueling, the high that he gets is unlike any other and unique to him in his eyes, and so mainly, he's gonna focus on the more fun side of dueling instead of the actual logistics of it.

-> it did come as the consequence of a dare, so you can't really blame him for not taking it seriously at first. It was either that, or sneak into the obelisk blue dorm and take a dip in the obnoxiously large pool they have - and jaden was already in the hot seat and couldn't risk any more shenanigans at the moment.

-> that is to say, he's not necessarily a *bad* teacher. he's just not the kind of guy to be all....teacher-y about it. He's gonna make it fun and engaging, but you're gonna have to be the one asking the questions and taking the lead on your duel monsters learning.

-> for jaden, he's gonna lean more into the 'dive head first' kind of strategy. he'll wanna start a duel up right away, and while you don't necessarily understand what's going on, you trust jaden enough to follow his lead on things, and gradually, you pick up on certain things based on his own dueling strategy. the easier parts, such as setting traps and spells and basic summoning techniques, gravitate to you quickly, and jaden gets more excited the faster you pick it up, since it means the duel itself can pick up speed.

-> jaden does give you feedback though, and this is obviously after he's went wild and had his fun. I think he'd make jokes about your mistakes so you won't feel bad about them and to alleviate any pressure you may be feeling. after all, dueling is suppose to be fun (such a shocker compared to the world they live in). but over all, jaden makes sure you experience the fun that comes with dueling while still showing you the basics so that they stick.

-> the first time you beat jaden, he's honestly kind of dumbfounded...and so are you. neither of you realize what's happened after a few minutes, but when you do, of course jaden's initial response is for a rematch. you think it's because he wants to see if you can do it again, and while that's partially true...he also just wants to one up you and get that adrenaline rush again. it turns into a long-winded back and forth thing throughout the duration of your time at duel academy - you beating him, he beating you - until your last duel ends in a draw and you ultimately call a truce.

-> jaden thinks youre the only one who can match his energy during a duel and thats what really spurs him on. it's only natural that since he's the one that taught you, you'd have a more spontaneous style to the game, and that's what jaden seeks out during duels - someone to keep up with him and to keep the energy alive. believe it or not jaden gets a teeny hit jealous when you show that kind of energy to someone else in a duel. you find him pouting like a puppy and when you ask what's wrong, he just says "nothin'" because even he doesn't know why he acts like that, until Cyrus starts teasing him about potentially liking you....and it starts becoming a serious accusation the more Jaden refuses to respond to them.

yusei fudo

-> now don't hate me ... and don't hate him, but yusei is the kind of teacher who makes you work for it. hes not gonna give you the answer ir explain things to you right away, because to him it takes away the the whole point of learning how to duel *your* way. there's never gonna always be someone in your corner giving you a play by play for each turn, so you have to be able think fast and critically on your own to survive in a real duel.

-> it comes about as a sort of 'service exchange' - he needs help with some diagnostic software runs on his duel runner, and in exchange, he teaches you the fundamentals of dueling, as you've never actually learned even though you've been running with his crew for some time. so he deems it about time you learned (y'know, now that there isnt an imminent threat of world destruction to stop you).

-> he'll either tell you constantly "youre not suppose to do that" over and over again, or when you make a suspicious or an off move, he'll ask "why'd you do that?" and it lowkey frustrates you, because you're not being told exactly what's wrong so you can fix it. he doesn't let you get frustrated to the point where you get pissed off and want to stop, though - he'll ask you different questions to gage your thinking before showing you how it's done on his end. that mostly means you losing the practice duels, though, but you don't mind, as with each match, you learn a little more, until you can finally take him in a hand-to-hand duel without any guidance.

-> turbo dueling is a completely different beast though - one that damn near gets you in the hospital. Granted, you've only ridden Yusei's bike a handful of times in situations that were also life or death, so you're not completely experienced with it. of course, he's smart, and has you ride it around a couple of times to get the feel of it before having the speed world spellcard engage. though both of you quickly learn that with the added pressure of maintaining speed as well as focusing on driving and playing the game was too much....so you both agree that maybe turbo dueling isn't for you just yet.

-> yusei always makes time to have a duel with you if you ask him. given the amount of times he's had to duel for the sake of the world, it's definitely a change of pace just having a tabletop duel for fun. he's also always on the lookout for cards that could be useful for whatever kind of deck you intend to build for yourself, and even asks the twins about any new releases in the city that you might be interested in. akin to his silent caring personality, he'll also gift you a duel disk of your own, fitted to your arm size and adjustable as well.

-> you better believe this guy gets extremely excited when you win a duel, whether it be against him or anyone else. he may be a bit of a hard teacher, but it's all so rewarding in the end when you can stand on your own against an opponent; especially with those endearing acts of praise like a nice pat on the head, shoulder, or back and even a tight bear hug. the guys may tease him a bit for always having a smile on his face whenever he's in the stands watching you duel, but it falls on deaf ears to yusei, who's always gonna sport a neverending smile of pride

If you enjoyed, please leave a like, comment, and reblog for others to see! And don’t be shy to send in a request!

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

HIII I KNOW. A LITTLE BIT ABOUT ANNIHILATION. PERIPHERALLY. ive seen like part of it but i do NOT remember much. except that its one of the prettiest movies ive ever seen. that being said im so eyes emoji abt ur au..... r there any specific scenes frm the movie ur thinking about?? how would the character dynamics differ from either canon?? etc etc etc!!!

GOD I FUCKING LOOOOOVE ANNIHILATION. ONE OF MY TOP 5 FAVORITE MOVIES OF ALL TIME EVER. yes yes yes yes yes OK. so this is. all encompassing crossover jrwi au which means I'm pulling characters from different campaigns. which. usually im not a huge fan of but i think i pulled it off rlly well in a limited sense here bc i have very specific reasoning behind why i put each character where. u will know at least two of them and they WILL cause you psychic damage so trust me when i say the other ones will too. putting this under a cut bc im gonna ramble

BASICALLYYYYY it's gonna follow the plot of the movie pretty closely just with slightly altered character dynamics + each of their reasons for going into the shimmer. so each person on the Current Team has lost someone on a previous expedition, and basically all of them are trying to find answers for what happened to their loved ones.

im gonna talk mainly about the ones you know because youll understand where I'm coming from the best with them but just know I am OBSESSED w the roles I have put gillion and chip in here. god I miss riptide every day .

DAKOTA COLE AS ANYA. Anya is the retired paramedic !! she's the one that. hold everything. gets killed by the fucked up bear. smile. that was just a fun little coincidence for me . ORIGINALLY I was dead set on having the pd representative be william bc im biased and I love him but after rewatching the movie I just think dakota fits in anyas place so perfectly. she's the most outgoing of the group, she's the one that initially invites Lena to join their team (also side note there is a pre-existing dynamic between dakota and chip because they've had MULTIPLE interactions in various what if crossover episodes and their dynamic is one of my favorite things ever). she's also the most aggressive. she's the first one to snap into action mode after finding the body in the pool, she's the one to take josie away from it and has a very protective stance over josie for the rest of the time after that (this is going to be relevant i am gonna talk about josie next) . once the group starts arguing about whether they want to continue further into the shimmer, anya shifts into a VERY black and white mentality, pinning ventress as The Bad Guy immediately for wanting to continue. and then when Lena shows some hesitancy over what she wants to do, anya snaps into a "youre either with me or against me" mindset. she also has this growing sense of paranoia ever since they find the tape of what appears to be the previous crew killing each other, and after she learns Lena is lying to them about her connection with Kane she goes way overboard with tying them to chairs and threatening to kill them. while i don't think dakota would necessarily go that far I DID say this to jonesy when we were rewatching the movie together so. bfu connecting two dots meme

anyway i think dakota is in the shimmer looking for william AND vyncent. parallels to the "dakota leaves for 10 months without telling them" which is why the three of them would be separated in the first place. william somehow finds out about the southern reach and his draw toward a mystery is what causes him to join the first expedition. vyncent goes with him because he can sense it's dangerous (and basically a suicide mission) and doesn't want william to go alone. I have. ideas. for what happens to them in the shimmer but they are vague at best right now and even then. dakota never finds out what happens to them before he's killed by the bear. the bear uses their voices to draw him out btw. smile. he dies protecting thr rest of the group even immediately after his paranoid breakdown.

OK THAT GOT LONG. OOPS. ONTO THE SECOND ONE

SHILO AS JOSIE. ohhhhh josie radek one of my favorite characters in media of all time. God I love her so much. anyway she's the only one of the current expedition with no previous combat training, so she's often seen by the rest of them as someone who needs to be protected. if I'm remembering correctly she's also the youngest. (in this. au. dakota would be older than shilo. feels better in my mind. none of them would be Kids they'd all be adults at this point but I'd put shilo in early 20s and dakota maybe in mid 20s. so . still young.) shilo is in the shimmer looking for his twin brother who went missing. somehow he was able to track down the southern reach and find out emizel was part of a previous expedition, and desperately wants to get him back. he's the one with the LEAST amount of knowledge going into the shimmer. he doesn't realize it's a suicide mission. he just wants his brother back. anyway when they get to the first outpost they find the remnants of the first team's base of operations, with names on a guard patrol rotation and leftover weapons and. a video camera. with a tape in a plastic bag labeled "for those who follow". josie is the one holding the camera when they watch it. the tape shows members of the previous party in the abandoned pool, one guy tied to a chair while the others cut open his abdomen to show his intestines moving around like snakes or worms. in the movie, the guy who cuts him open is Kane, Lena's husband. the rest of the party doesn't know her connection to kane, and she knows now if she tells them they won't trust her (and is proven correct by this when anya eventually finds out her connection) ANYWAY I'm going off track. sorry this is my favorite scene in the whole movie I get distracted. ANYWAY so when they see this, josie is the most immediately horrified by it because she's the only one who hasn't seen anything as gruesome as that before. for shilo. well. he gets to see the one being cut open is emizel. and then later when they get to the pool and find the body still there (again. josie is the one to find this. she's also the one who reaches down into the old dirty water and accidentally picks up the knife. which was still left in the same place they saw it be dropped in the tape) corpse plastered to the wall by all kinds of multicolored fungus and lichen, I think shilo doesn't immediately break down, he doesn't really. process it right away. I mean it's completely unrecognizable. it's not until he accidentally picks up the knife that it all clicks into place in his mind and he realizes "that thing right there used to be my fucking brother" and completely shuts down. runs out of the complex, dakota has to chase him down because they all know its dangerous to go anywhere alone, etc. after this he loses any sense of purpose, the only reason he came into the shimmer in the first place was to get emizel back and now seeing what happened I think he just gets. hopeless. which is the beginning of the end for him . i haven't decided if his exact death is the same as josies but i want it to be peaceful in the same sort of way. "imagine dying frightened and in pain and having that be the only part of you which survives... i wouldnt like that at all" "ventress wants to face it.. you want to fight it... im not sure i want either of those things...." josie radek i am in love with you. anyway. annihilation pool scene for you because I love this image more than anything

[sunsetstarving]

would like to start this by saying there is DUH no time limit on answering this i sooooooooo get it <3

i finished legend of korra and have been mulling it over playing minecraft and just RRRHRHSDFERRRLKFD

i think my favorite part of the whole show is how humanized all the villains are? underneath it all theyre just guys who've been fucked over one too many times. and each time the *basis* of their quest is valid.. it's just that they go about it in ways that actively hurt people. it's like, okay, so you want this, but the people who are directly affected by this change have to *agree* with it before you start enacting it. you cant just... force people to change their entire way of life thats not how life works. which....... SUCH parallels to palestine im kinda going crazy over here bc its rlly just enforcing my like. not understanding of how zionists can uphold their ideology. really ANYONE who's belief system requires the putting down of another group. but especially with zionism.

its like.. ok sure you want the land but fun fact?? people literally already live there?? and you cant in any way make yourselves look like the good guys by forcing people out of their homes. ESPECIALLY when you already have your own land.

mainly connects to the fourth season lol

also lowkey HILARIOUS to me how much the spirit vines felt like a metaphor for nuclear power lmao. like ok?? way to go making a critique of something that happened like 70 years ago (when season four was released anyway).

obviously not the most eloquently put as it is past midnight and i am sorta shaking from either the windows being open or the avalanche of thoughts being had about korra (probably a combo)

my other favorite part got realized during the last episode and idk if you care about spoilers or not so i wont say anything too detailed but basically just admiring korra's growth as a character etc etc. tbh something the people making these shows are so good at????? like give the same attention as character arcs to romance plotlines :') (i will say, however, that by the time mako/asami/korra were all just friends i LOVED them it was never more awkward than it shouldve been and i super appreciated that)

RAHHHHH YEAH!!! oh man i knew u would love the villains they're just so fantastically done. i think my personal favorite had always been zaheer because of how interesting his philosophical debate was with korra but also as i've been rewatching i've also come to appreciate all three of the main villains just. how much their debates are also something that korra gets to (in some ways) understand?? iirc. and yeah it is horrific how it compares to real life and how vividly similar it is. tbh i find a lot of the comparison to current events also in the original atla just because like... the total destruction because they think that they deserve this power more, and then the insane propaganda that affects those on the inside if that makes sense. i didn't like the live action show but watching the first episode just had me sitting down and staring at a wall because in general just. how can we look at death like this and think that it's okay. anyway

i mean hey man we can always use some more critique of nuclear power it's always good to dissuade the kids who will become adults someday

anywho DO tell me more about korra's development i would love to hear ur thoughts (also YEAH the mako/asami/korra platonic dynamic was extremely nice and deeply appreciated. it settled nicely despite all of the pains)

[chaotic-toby]

I might write this out or I might not, but I just had to type this out bc I will explode if I don't. Please excuse Toby's ramblings.

Okay, so I've mentioned before about how I wanted to write something about Asa Emory's childhood. Like, a collection of one-shots showcasing random thoughts about how his childhood was like. Just random things I think up.

Well, while I was walking to my third period class today, I thought of Asa Emory in high school and how much of a train wreck that would be.

As I've established before, Asa was-- and still is-- a loner. He barely had any friends in school and the few he had seemed to drift away. I'll come back to that later bc I have a whole thing about that.

Asa hated his classmates. I know that when Asa was in school, it was a completely different generation if you're thinking realistically, but this is mainly me projecting (shocker I know it /sarc) so let's just say that his classmates act similar to how high schoolers act in this day and age.

He despises them. I've seen someone headcanon that Asa hates loud noises, and after rewatching The Collector for the sixth time today, I can see it. His classmates were so loud, and everyday, he would come home overstimulated. However, as a kinda shy student, there wasn't much he could do about that, so he just tried to focus on his school work. His teachers LOVED him, though they were also a bit creeped out by him as well, but they tried their best to not judge too much. Though there were some teachers that didn't care and mistreated him but he ignore them.

Asa tried acting like he didn't care that he didn't have close friends, but when he watched people talking to their friends or partners, he would get jealous. He tried dating the few people who surprisingly took an interest in him, but those relationships never lasted long. They were either using him for sex (asexual Asa believer (I literally just thought about that as I am writing this)) or they were using him to seem nice or something. Idk. Eventually, he just gave up trying to date someone, and every time someone asked him out, he either ignored them or rudely declined.

Everytime there was a bug in the classroom, Asa would stop anyone from killing it, pick it up, open the window, and let it free. He never understood why people would get mad at him for that. It was like they wanted to see bug guts splattered on the ground.

Anyways, back to his friends. This is the part I am excited to discuss. So, I've said that Asa didn't have many friends, but he did have one that he considered a close friend at one point. I like to think he had a friend from the 7th grade all the way to the 12th. However, in the 12th grade, the friend started to hang out with another person a lot. At first, Asa didn't mind. He didn't expect his friend to only be friends with him, nor consider him their best friend. However, he soon noticed how everytime they were hanging out, and the friend's friend showed up, the friend would pay more attention to the other person than him. Again, he was fine with it. He was a quiet person anyways, and the main thing he liked to talk about was insects and gory stuff. It was understandable if his friend wanted to hang out with someone normal.

Though, this eventually evolved into his friend, not ignoring him per se, but Asa became the third wheel. Asa wanted to hang out with his friend, but his friend's friend was always there, taking all of his friend's attention. Every time he tried to start a conversation, the other person will interrupt, leaving Asa to just stand there, watching as his friend was noticeably more happier with their new best friend.

At first, he was sad. He's known his friend since the 7th grade, while the newcomer had only known them since the 10th grade. Asa had known them longer, and yet, it was obvious that his friend preferred the other person over him. He didn't cry over it. Of course not, but it did dampen his mood for a while. It led to him skipping breakfast at school just so he wouldn't have to sit beside his friend only to get ignored.

This sadness, however, eventually turned into anger. He had thoughts about killing his friend's friend, knowing full well that he could get away with it. He spent weeks planning it over. Thinking of all the things he could do to them. How he could mutilate them, if he should even keep them in the first place, or if he should put the person somewhere public so that his friend could see; could see the mistake they made. (I wanna say that that was his first ever kill and what started it all).

Welp, that's all I've thought about. None of what I've said is canon, obviously. Just my little headcanons and projecting. I love Asa so much and I wish the Collector movies were more popular :(

[odysseys-blood]

This is literally the first time ever ill do one of these after being tagged in ig bc i always forgot! anyways got tagged by @taketheringtolohac for a "9 people you want to get to know better" game!

Last Song: Sway - A Trak & AJ Christou ft. Duckwrth

i luv duckwrth and this song is super wavy someone come dance to it with me

Favorite color: Idk what to call it like a wine purple? this thang and similar shades

i also rly like deep reds too. if u ever notice i accidentally tend to use mainly the red-blue portion of the color wheel in art and its not a concious decision either it just kinda happens and i try to steer away from it every once in a while and it never sticks.

Currently Watching: nothing rly!

it takes me forever to start watching things and get through them. The last series i finished I think were Witchblade and Link Click abt a month or so ago. I was also planning to watch yuri kuma sometime soon bc i remembered ppl posting about it but i never watched it while it was airing, as well as a rewatch of banana fish bc my brother brought it up bc he was using it as a topic for his paper recently????? i dont even know why he knows it but oh. well i guess. was also gonna watch mignon but the art style is getting me and my city hunter plans have been dashed by the sheer volume of episodes scaring me for now

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: i like them all!

not sure i rly prefer one over the others but i like to bake so maybe sweet. did you know my baking enemy is cookies idk what it is but if im making my own from scratch somehow they always turn out wrong. fav thing to bake is cinnamon rolls i just havent done any in a while bc they take so long (also bc i wanna do peach cobbler style cinnamon rolls which ive done before! but that takes extra long bc of the extra toppings you have to make)

Relationship Status: who want me

Current Obsession: ok prefacing this with these r not good games and im gonna censor the names so they dont show up in tags

i got into some eroge gacha named wh*t in hell is bad back in october and it has not let up since. i filled an entire sketchbook almost w/ doodles of my mc. also replayed through nu c*rnival recently bc they added voice overs for almost the entire game for the second anniversary (ive been playing since maybe 3 months after its release). everything is on the backburner to me rn besides these games and maybe the everyday maintenance of shinozaki bc im thinking abt finishing it bc i love it. anyways forget abt those last two and look at shinozaki

Last Thing You Searched: list of mythical weapons

this was not for anything important except that i rly wanna get a black cat and name it excalibur (nicknamed cali for short). however excalibur is exclusively for if i get the litte black kitty of my dreams but if i get a cat w/ another coat eventually i have to pick a different name so i was brainstorming.

i didnt think this was so long (///￣ ￣///)

anyways ill tag @meicheesecake @feluka @beepiiboop @nil-number @theunstablejester @luminousrabbittt @scamoosh @tilapiamafia and im forgetting names but if u wanna do one then tag ur it ☆〜（ゝ。∂ )

[greatyme]

9 Fandom Peeps to Get to Know Better:

Thank u @troubled-mind for the tag!! I swear I didn’t forget to do it hahahah

3 ships you like:

Ok so I’ve technically done this tag before BUT I’m gonna take this chance to do 3 DIFFERENT ships from when I last did it hehehe

wei qian & wei zhiyuan - unknown

currently airing angsty Taiwanese bl my beloved. They’ve been on my brain all goddamn day. Ep6 was INCREDIBLE and I keep going back to rewatch parts. I can’t wait to see how their relationship develops and ahem.. certain scenes the cast has teased lol

hira & kiyoi - utsukushii kare

I never stop thinking about them. I have a literal whole paper I want to write about just One aspect of their relationship which I WILL COMPLETE one day. They have the perfect dynamic… they r so like hualian it’s insane (both ships unironically redefined my expectations in love forever). Utsukare is a masterclass on characterization imo and that makes it such a fantastically written romance. I’ve never related to a character sm as I have w hira so ummm if there’s any kiyoi’s out there.. hai <3

aylin & luna - 23.5 degrees

I have to put at least ONE of the 23.5 couples on here!! These girls r so catered to me… I can see myself in both of them in diff ways and I love it so much!!! This show is so sweet and I feel so lucky I get to experience it live

First ship ever:

I said this last time but I also don’t rlly remember… probably the doctor & rose lol. Maybe something from an old Nickelodeon/Cartoon Network show idk

Last song you heard:

NOCTURNE AND FIRE DANCE!!!! My lowkey all time favorite harp pieces. I CAN play this I just can never get a good recording so idk if it’ll ever see the light of day to those that don’t know me irl. It’s challenging in a fun way. Anyway I was just listening back to a full performance! (But aside from that I’ve had a few bl osts, mainly from unknown, on repeat lmao)

Favorite childhood book:

Maybe something like the 3 scary stories to tell the dark series? Or miss peregrine’s home for peculiar children? I liked scary stuff

Currently reading:

……….yes I am still in my tgcf reread. But I haven’t had time bc I’ve always had other stuff to do 💔 I have a few other books I need to get to as well…

Currently watching:

Anti reset, unknown, 23.5 degrees, love is better the second time around, and the miracle of teddy bear (+ a few things that are on hold I guess. And I’ll start jazz for two tomorrow once it airs)

Currently consuming:

Nothing! But I had chicken soup earlier and it was v healing :P

Currently craving:

A rested night’s sleep lol

Tagging: aaahh not sure who’s done this but @sailub @universe-club @sunsfancyscooter @grapejuicegay here’s a tag if u haven’t yet & want to lol

[squeakheart]

what's Bebe's dynamic with the Blackbeard crew like? Obviously you ship her with Blackbeard but is she also shipped with the others?

ok insane rambling and some nsft soooo .. this post is going under the cut but

i mainly ship her with blackbeard buuut .. i feel like a lotta casual sex goes on in that crew so stuff w the others inevitably just happens lol? never planned to make bebe polyamorous bc i am very much not polyamorous irl but it just sorta started making sense once i started making bebe less of 'me' and more of her own character

bebe and blackbeard have a little lovey dovey thing going on bc i really like the gap moe of a big scary guy like him having a soft spot for my little mouse ^_^ not that hes not also rough and dominant with her too but. yknow. they have a special bond bc when they first meet he says some stuff that makes a big impact on her aaaand she baked him a real nice cherry pie so hes totally ride or die for her lol. i dont feel like retyping my whole ass backstory so heres bebe wiki screenshots

needless to say. important to her.

slightly less going on with the others but i would say yeah i still ship her with them

burgess and her sleep together for SURE bc um. hes hot as fuck. his huge muscles and confident charisma have captivated her .. hes an irresistable guy. i think her dynamic with him is more playful than her dynamic w teach and theres a lot of likeee him tossing her in the air and chasing her and pinning her down 🥰🥵 shes a weak little mousey but she really enjoys it

doc q and bebe are like genuine bffs bc theyre both sick forever .. chronic illness solidarity. their dynamic hovers somewhere between "platonic" and "holding each others cocks while they pee" its a special bond. they definately fuck nasty style but only when theyre not both too unwell lmao. bebe/doc started out genuinely just platonic but every day i realise more and more how fucking handsome he is so uh. call me in a week and ill probably tell you shes in love with him

van augur .. hm .. yknow i dont actually think about him and bebe that much bc i know a couple of people who ship their ocs with him already and their ocs usually spring to mind for augur before bebe! a lotta the stuff i have for her and augur is just her teasing him for being a big nerd hehe .. but sitting down and thinking about it .. sure. bebe and augur can kiss with tongue ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ if i do think about bebe/augur i usually think about my husbands transfem augur AU bc something about augur with tit growth does it for me lol

laffitte and bebe are mainly like. gossipy brunch friends who meet up for coffee and make fun of everyone else lol. also passive agressive to each other constantly. hes my least fav so they probably have the least romantic tension out of the original crew. something sexual going on tho. i think laffitte gets a little jealous of anyone who's close to blackbeard and they have weird sex about it where laffitte makes sure to let bebe uhm. know her place on the crew. hes taking his "chief of staff" position very seriously i guess

i have some stuff brewing for the later additions to the crew too but our household rewatch is only just up to impel down so i want to let myself mull them over more before i commit to any dynamics hehe

thanks for reading if u read this far. take this post timeskip bebe from my sketchpad as some kinda reward

[raysletters]

Ask game!

thank you @read-and-write-, @suseagull04 and @daisymae-12 for tagging me <33

name: ray (or the less common name that is my actual birth name that ppl on discord might know 💀)

sign: aries sun, virgo moon and escorpio rising

time: 7:47pm (what's with all these specific questions?? 💀💀)

favorite band/artist: this is so hard yall this changes by seasons ajdbkzhsdbjwdbkasbansjsj rn its taylor swift and no, i dont have tickets to see the movie and im very sick atm so if i ever see a spoiler i might scream and cry.

fun additions (bc i have never been able to decide 💀) are måneskin (AND IM SEEING THEM THE 24TH), conan gray, and twenty one pilots

last movie: i- i think it was something about rock art for my audiovisual narrative class??? bc it was either that or rwrb i think

last show: the other two on hbomax (thanks to dany's recommendation and i finished it up in like a week ahdndjsbdjsbsmdhsj), before that was heartstopper season 2 that im waiting a bit to rewatch shsksjsksjsksjskssusksj

when i created this blog (and other blogs): i have absolutely no idea. ive created several blogs for different fandoms ive been in, and then have deleted most, if not all, of them because as soon as my hyperfixation passes, i cringe at myself from literally a year ago. learning and growing and all that jazz ig. though, replying to the actual question 💀, i guess this one started to become active by july for @the-brownstone anniversary fic exchange(?

do i get asks: i think the only time ive gotten asks was on nice ask day and it was really cool, but y'all can absolutely ask me anything always (not that im really interesting, but i can give you colombian food recommendations :DDDD)

average hours of sleep: its either 4 or 12 hours, theres no in between. it all depends on my blood sugar levels yaaay /s

instruments: i have a piano in my room and all, i learned to play with my right hand thanks to youtube, but then my motor skills have never been really good, so im still struggling to learn to use both hands correctly, but oh well.

what i'm wearing: pijamas (mainly bc im really fucking sick and it hurts to breathe oh yay /s)

dream job: writer, be a book writer or script writer or journalist writer (my top three in that order), i just want to put my ideas out there in the world (which is incredibly funny when you realize ive had a writers block for ages and the diabetic!henry fic has gone more than a year without updating)

im incredibly late to this as always, but oh well. is there anyone that hasn't do it?? idk but if u see this and u haven't, ur absolutely not obligated to do it :D

[crowniko]

Me writing today for my shinji/reader fic

I wanna have a few chapters polished before I post the first one 👀

here's a little taste though: the story is set in the main storyline. It'll jump around from the current timeline to flashbacks and all of that. The reader is gender neutral and used to be the 5th seat in Squad 5. They have a friends to lovers dynamic, but it's very slow burn bc shinjis a bitch.

anyways, expect drama since I have fomo so of course the reader is gonna be a part of an incident that went down 100 years before the current timeline.

They might also have some interactions with hueco Mundo bc I love the concept of it and want to explore it more.

Also, something important to note, is that I'm gonna try to leave a lot up to imagination reader wise. like I won't say hair color or body descriptions. it'll be vague for y'all. but there's one thing that won't be vague: the reader's Zanpakuto. it's a critical part in the plot so I couldn't create one up to interpretation. it'll have a name and a whole description, but that's it.

I'm going to try to keep each character's personality accurate, but sometimes it might get a bit ooc. mainly that'll be me exploring a part of the character that I didn't see enough in the manga, like I wanna give justice to shinjis strength (he deserved more in tybw 😭) and his kindness. also orihime is a sweet child that deserves no harm. she went through trauma that isn't nearly recognized enough. I'll also explore Zanpakutos more since I love that shit. (and personified hollows like White Ichigo)

Finally, the reason why it's taking me a bit to get this out is bc I'm currently rewriting it/starting from scratch. I do have 200 pages of content, but it's all in first and third perspective with my own OC. It's also old and has a lot of things I would change now, but I'm using it for ideas/rewriting it in a second perspective. I can always post a chapter of it if y'all want to see something. a crumb.

that's all, sorry for another rant. I've been rewatching bleach, writing, and realized that this account was going to get dusty if I didn't post an update soon (my bad)

-Nico :)

[numetaljackdog]

what i'm listening to 5/5/2023 (song notes under cut)

spot. link//yt link

Laura Les - Haunted: haunted. by laura les.

Machine Girl - Dumbass!!: i was listening to a whole bunch of machine girl in the lead-up to the gecs n girl show and i feel like it made me a bigger fan than i had been previously. i honestly still am not like the most familiar with their individual songs but this is one of the ones that sticks with me. NO SUCH THING AS THE BOOGEYMAN!!!!

Cracked Out - If You Leave Me I'll Kill Myself: pretty tasteless but as soon as i came across this post and listened to it i was immediately hooked on this song. it reminds me of the dumb edgy comedy bullshit i would have listened to as a tween, but like, the better side of that stuff. it was basically impossible to find much of anything about this group, so the spotify track is a local file that you guys won't be able to play, and it wasn't on youtube so i actually uploaded it myself this morning just to put it in the playlist lol

Sum 41 - In Too Deep: i feel like sum 41 tends to kinda get dismissed as part of the obnoxious skate punk scene of the 90s-00s, and to a large extent that's fair, but man did they have some good hits. i feel like edgy teen songs like these really can work by being simple as long as they just hit the premise with everything they've got, and this would be an example

Tyler, The Creator - DOGTOOTH: i was very pleased when this reached the top 40, brief though its stint was. i've been getting more into tyler recently bc i feel like i've been missing out, he's really such an interesting artist and he balances a lot of different traits super well while still delivering the goods in terms of good beats, good lines, etc. seriously, "not sure what you overheard but it's probably what I said" is such a good fucking line

Nick Lutsko - A Ghost Story: would STRONGLY recommend checking out the video for this one, either in the youtube playlist or on tumblr here actually never mind i can't find it. watch it on youtube it's fun. i followed nick lutsko on youtube for a while before whatever network it was that he was producing for went under. probably machinima. i mainly knew him because of his limp bizkit parody which is funny bc i wasn't even listening to actual limp bizkit at the time. anyway i really like his voice and i'm actually glad that he's still finding success these days

Naughty By Nature - O.P.P.: as i've referenced, i've been rewatching robbydude's paper mario vods, which are very good, and in one of the early ones robby references this song and it made me look it up. and then i made this post and it was underrated. i don't really have anything else to say it's just a good classic rap song

Slipknot - Left Behind: putting this here as more of a landmark to represent that i've been listening to iowa (the album this is from) a lot in general. i've had slipknot on the brain recently more than usual (not for any reason of course. winks) and reminded myself of why everyone loves iowa so much. it's so fucking brutal and biting... nu metal <3

Busta Rhymes - Woo Hah!!: honestly another one where it's like yeah idk this is just a classic what do you want me to say. busta's a legend and this song is legendary and he tears it up and it's good

Sweet Trip - Tekka: probably the most direct of the violet finds from this month (hi violet :3) i had never listened to sweet trip before but tekka instantly grabbed me... it's all crunchy and stuttery and has yummy synths. i especially love how it just fucking breaks down in the second half it's like that machine that's breaking down and sweating and sputtering it's almost sexual. you know

Ike & Tina Turner - I'll Never Need More Than This: so i've been on my phil spector bullshit, as you might have guessed, so i was revisiting some of his tracks to just kinda take it all in. as always, it. well it sounds really fucking good, and tina turner turned in a killer performance as always. i love. sound :)

Rowdy Rebel - Computers (feat. Bobby Shmurda): I'M SLIDIN OVER CARS WHILE I SHOOT

.

.

.

THEY THINK THAT I'M TOM CRUISE

Machine Girl - Scroll of Sorrow: it's really rather exciting. see for those in the know (which is all of you bc there's only two or three people reading this), you're aware that my mutual (hi again :3) had posted about how, at the live show, the vocalist of machine girl got up real near the crowd (including said mutual) during scroll of sorrow. as such, i was listening out for the song at my own show and well chat i'll tell you i was not able to recognize it :-) but there was one point where they got up on the railing above the pit and were singing from up there, and while it wasn't like exceptionally close to where we were at, it was still cool bc it was like hey! that's like the thing! that i heard about! :) amd anyway i like the song

Sonic The Hedgehog - His World: itsa banger... i actually heard the penny parker cover of this song from the sonic fandub way before ever hearing the original so even now i still mix up the lyrics but it's fine. i've actually never played a mainline sonic game or any video game or any media at all but i like the music

Strapping Young Lad - Oh My Fucking God: i straight up didn't know that strapping young lad was a devin townsend thing, not that i've listened to any of his other stuff. this song's weird and loud and stupid and i like it

Rae Sremmurd - No Flex Zone: okay now. based on this one and the previous song, can anyone guess what semi-popular artist playlist i was listening to this month? i tried to listen to a lot more rap this month, because i wish to learn more about this beautiful world. no flex zone has been my first exposure to rae sremmurd and it was a good one, although i like one of the guys way better than the other one. slim jxmmi i like him better

glass beach - classic j dies and goes to hell part 1: i didn't really "get" glass beach for a while, i thought they were alright, but this month they started to click (once again with some help - check out this post teehee). they're cute, earnest, and high-energy; i have to kinda be in the mood but i can get into it 👍 i've also seen the band described as sort of a modern emo type deal and while i don't yet know if i agree or disagree with that it compels me

NLE Choppa - Final Warning: straight up this dude is weird and has a weird hit on the charts rn but bc of that i was like "ok let's see what he was like before his big image change" and ended up liking some of that stuff. he's so energetic and it really gets you pumped up, which is def what i'm looking for in this type of thing. he's got some interesting lines, too. it almost makes me wish he hadn't changed at all - i feel like i missed out lol

Vanilla Ice - Prozac: okay look i try not to vanillapost too much but like i'm a little bit insane about vanilla ice. i'm obsessed with his career path and it is not uncommon for me to just sit and think about it for an hour or more. i really enjoy his nu metal stuff, at least the earlier portions of it, and this is a top-tier track from that era. real headbanger. FUNKY RHYME KILLER, THE DOPE SONG DEALER

[seasideselfships]

Howdy Maverick! I read your Carrd and it seems we've got a lot of things in common like a love for space (and maybe the ocean??? I love your url name and also your names!!) and a couple of f/os who share the same media, so please know I'd be so thrilled to have you in my Ask box and talk about them if you'd like!

Some I noticed were your T//V//D f/os and Avengers f/os-- it makes me so happy to know you also do domestic ave.ngers please I'd love our s/is to be friends (maybe Max is able to learn some things from Xiomara and also vice versa? Whiplash went to Xavier's since she's a mutant--- did Syntax? Maybe they met there and could be assigned together? Idk but it's all fun to me!) for both media tell me all about yours anytime ;----;

Anyway, I wanted to also send these asks for different f/os and invite you to gush or talk about any of them in my Ask box too! (Also i love the different FOB lyrics i found looking through your Carrd, they're my favorite band!!!)

👍The Good Part👍 ~ What moment made you realize that you had to be with your F/O? For the Lo.st Bo.ys! (Love that your s/i is from key west btw I LOVE key west it's the only good place in Florida besides the space Center/LH)

🌃Chelsea Streets🌃 ~ If you could go anywhere, where would you and your F/O wanna vacation at? How would it go? With the Johnathan & the rest of the Byers fam + Hopper? Like a big family trip?

🎶Overture🎶 ~ Tell us a few of your favorite/most important memories involving your F/O! With Stefan?

Moxie @tex-treasures

Again, my ask box is always open so please feel free to stop on by anytime!✨💜

Howdy Moxie!! You guess correctly, I do have an odd fascination with the ocean, hence the 'seasideselfships' user!! Great observation!  Domestic av.engers is 10/10 my comfort ship, to go back to when I need Soft Vibes. It's so fun to be a big ol found family!! As far as s/is, I would love for them to be friends, please-

Max and Xiomara would be such fun friends! I read a little of your s/i write-up, and I feel they'd get along swimmingly! They'd definitely have a bit to learn from each other, and I think they'd have fun teaching each other, maybe over tea!  And as far as Syntax, I play fast and loose with her story, so it wouldn't be much to move her to Xavier's!! She's been my ma.rvel and all related stuff s/i for ages and I kind of edit her backstory to fit her where I fit her. Would be very fitting though to add Xavier's to her timeline since I went back + rewatched the first couple movies + got Major Sibling Vibes from Charles - And yes FOB!!! There's mainly fob, a few p! ones and one or two mcr ones, bc I haven't grown out of my emo phase and I still love all that music, but I vibe super heavy with FOB so they got the honor of being most of my tags-

Now that I have successfully rambled a mile of stuff, on to answer questions! 👍The Good Part👍 ~ What moment made you realize that you had to be with your F/O?  For the Lo.st Bo.ys!  - I think the defining moment would be one night on the boardwalk, the boys stood up for Marina. As someone who had to hide what she was from her friends on shore in Key West, she was always afraid that revealing who she was would scare people away. And even knowing the boys weren't human, she was still wary. You never know how people will react. But one night she was alone before they got to the boardwalk, and they found her getting harassed by some ner-do-wells and scared them off. That was proof to Marina that they cared. 

🌃Chelsea Streets🌃 ~ If you could go anywhere, where would you and your F/O wanna vacation at? How would it go? With the Johnathan & the rest of the Byers fam + Hopper? Like a big family trip? Byers Hopper clan road trip? Oh boy. We'd probably embark on a massive camping trip, I wanna say north Michigan. Considering I'm familiar, it'd be super fun. Platte River Campground. I've got no clue if it was around in the 80s, but that's a great place for the fam to camp + see all the sights north Michigan has to offer, like porcupine mountain, the lake in the sky, and of course the bridge. 

🎶Overture🎶 ~ Tell us a few of your favorite/most important memories involving your F/O! With Stefan? OH boy... Even if it had alterior motives, the Mi.kaelson Ball! It was so fun. Getting dressed up, fancy party style. Dancing with Stefan, swoon.  A funnier memory is Stefan giving her the "I'm a vampire" speech and Max laughing and telling him she had a feeling, which leads to a conversation about her abilities. 

@tex-treasures thanks for the ask!!!!

[1d1195]

Bestie I had to search my email for the answer to the personality quiz because i took it YEARS ago lol The email said INFJ-T but then I decided to take it again because I think i have changed a bit since then lol The one I took today, i got INFP-T which is the "mediator". I think in some ways most teachers having an extroverted personality makes sense in my head lol In my head it also makes sense that might would be an ambivert but then again idk lol And i Use to LOVE those buzzfeed quizzes! I have a vivid memory of taking those quizzes with friends on the school bus ride back home in middle school lol

Your bf may have a point bc it's pretty common that when parents want to be "friends" instead of "parents" with their kids it mainly stems from other issues which then their kids are exposed to that. BUT I AM IN NO WAY DISSING YOUR MOM! literally being a parent is hard and that's just a generalization and very simplified version from what i've studied!

It's okay! I dont think any less of you or anything negative like that! Some people just don't get too much exposure with other cultures and that's okay as long as you are respectful, questions are always good to ask! Especially with Latinx/Hispanic cultures, they often get clumped together but there's a lot of diversity within those too! Ngl i BAWLED my eyes out Coco when it came out and I saw it in theaters with my parents and they cried too lol But its a yearly rewatch just to cry lol especially since my family actually celebrates the day of the dead it's in some ways therapeutic lol and I've never seen Encanto but i have seen clips and generational trauma is REAL so i understand how people found it so appealing, plus the songs were catchy lol And don't worry about unloading! At least for me, if it got too much I would tell you and I feel comfortable to do so because I know you wouldn't do anything with negative intention!

i will be SAT when you get to TA Harry! my TA is just SO AHHH like idk something about his vibe is something! Like he exudes confidence but not in a way where he's a jerk! plus bestie... HE HAS A SLEEVE OF TATTOOS! he wore a short sleeve today and ugh😵‍💫 I was going crazy in my head! i HIGHLY recommend going to a drag show! i love the drag scene! I think you would probably enjoy a nice drag brunch since those are mainly not in clubs or late at night lol But i do get not wanting to do too much when it's not needed lol like I DONT BLAME YOU!

BAHAH A COUPON! i kind of love thinking of it like that now! And my week is going okay! I went to the bookstore on campus today and got one of those "blind date" with a book so that was fun! I hope your week is going good!! ILY SO MUCH!! thank you for always taking the time to read my messages and responding 😭-💜

I so had a feeling we'd be similar!!! INFJ/INFP either way. I know there's a distinction but four out of five is pretty normal.

No my mom is def one of my best friends and that comes with good and bad. My mom relies heavily on me emotionally and kind of physically. My dad's in rough shape and my sister is also one of my bff's but she's useless when it comes to family stuff. Do you have siblings? I think you said you were an eldest daughter (but I totally could have made that up).

Okay long-winded thing that I talked about with my sister the other day, here we go: I saw this thing that said "you're only remembered for three generations." I thought that was so devastating and tragic because I hardly know my great-grandparents and I know NOTHING about anyone before them. I think I said to my sister word-for-word: "ya know, Day of the Dead is where it's at. That's how you're remembered that is the nicest, sweetest way to remember your family, your heritage." Like I'm really into my ancestry and I want to know more (but there's really not much about us--bunch of European peasants more than likely HAHAHAHAHA). But part of me wants to write an autobiography (it would probs be the MOST boring biography in the history of the world). It just seems sad to me that after a few generations I'll be forgotten, through no one's fault or anything. It's not like I'll be a famous politician or celebrity or a composer. It's just so wild. Anyway, all of this to say I think Day of the Dead is SO nice and cool (also it kicks of my b-day month) But I would love to learn more about your culture if you'd like to share! 💕

A SLEEVE OF TATTOOS OKAY SAY LESS 😍🤤 I'd melt. TA-Harry is writing itself! I have a thing about forearms--not like in a WEIRD way just like okay what was the reason for someone's forearm to look sexy? Like how does that work. There might just be something wrong with my brain.

OMG I've never tried a blind-date with a book! I love it! That sounds like so much fun! Let me know how you like!

LOVE YOU!

xoxo

[wannaliveattheholidayinn]

fun tag game? fun tag game. ty @janelevy for the tag <3

what book are you currently reading? 

i just finished i'm glad my mom died by jennette mccurdy, so now i'll probably move onto loveless by alice oseman or iron widow by xiran jay zhao

what’s your favorite movie you saw in theaters this year? 

i,,, genuinely cannot remember going to a single movie in theaters this year. i'm pretty certain i never went into theaters this year. although, now that i'm thinking my local theater did host a viewing of goncharov-

what do you usually wear? 

um,,, mainly,,, like dresses or shirts tucked into skirts. i don't own many "masculine" clothes and i'm just generally more comfy in "feminine" clothes

how tall are you? 

uh,,, 5'2 or 5'3 i think. i'm pretty short. i'm the shortest of my friend group

what’s your star sign? 

gemini !

do you go by your name or a nickname?

i'll go by anything if you clear it with me first. hannah? sure. 04? sure. jamie? sure. stan? sure. munchkin? ... sure, fine [redacted]

did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child? 

uh,,, so i'm in (community) college now w an undecided major (which funnily enough, i did not want to go to college when i was little), but i'm pretty sure i'm going into education. little me wasn't exactly sure what i wanted to grow up to be, i flip-flopped around a bit, but i clung onto actor for a while so,,, no, not really

are you in a relationship? if not, who is your crush if you have one? 

i am very single. i do have a crush on someone (two someones, actually), but i'm scared they'll find my tumblr so they'll remain unnamed. i do also have many crushes on celebrities who have no idea i exist

dogs or cats?

don't make me choose... okay fine, cats

if you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favorite picture/favorite line/favorite etc. from something you created this year?

oooh i am a fanfic writer (ik, i'm really cool /s), and my favorite fic has got to be this zep fic i wrote (pas de deux) kiss me backstage, in part bc it's just really personal. i'd say my favorite line in it is "She stepped away, wanting to see how he’d react before going. He seemed a little shocked, but slowly, a smile played at the edge of his lips. She smiled and then ran for her life towards the wings, because Jesus, she was late." what can i say, i'm a romantic who spent their final show of dance running to and from the wings

what’s something you would like to create content for?

ooooh um... maybe the west wing or wednesday or the punisher. definitely would like to write something for jessica jones. maybe if i'm feeling daring, derry girls?

what’s something you’re currently obsessed with? 

the west wing. did a rewatch a month or so back bc of hln and i remembered how much i love it. derry girls, abbott elementary, and she-hulk attorney at law have all been taking up considerable space in my head, especially derry girls. also, weirdly, the punisher, which i've only seen one episode and clips of

what’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year? 

... first kill. i tried really hard to like it, but idk there was a lot about it that rubbed me the wrong way and i just couldn't get into it the way i wanted to

what’s a hidden talent of yours?

um,,, it's not very hidden, but i have a pretty good singing voice. idk most ppl on here don't know and it isn't something i talk a lot abt with ppl i don't know... or maybe my hidden talent is the ability to ramble on for any given topic i'm somewhat passionate/invested in for hours on end, which i have done before

are you religious?

i'm not,,, religious, but i am somewhat observant of judaism, and i'd like to be more observant

what’s something you wish to have at this moment? 

um... i guess a friend to hug. idk, i'm kinda sad, i had to leave my family early for the holidays bc my dad caught covid and i just really wanna hug somebody... also, bc we live in a capitalist society, money

tagging @wannabe-etymologist, @pesby, @delphiniumblooms ! obviously, no pressure, if you guys don't wanna participate <3

also open to anyone who sees this and thinks it would be fun to have a go at it <3

[jemmo]

choosing to believe they're doing a fake-breakup. it wouldnt make sense for their characters but neither does a real one so

ok anon after sleeping on it and finally doing my rewatch (which hurt A LOT, just as much as the first time), ive gotta say i rlly dont know. the preview leaves a lot to be interpreted. everything could be taken at face value and equally be explained away so its a preview i cant really dig into bc i feel like its intention is to send us spiralling into madness.

what i can do is try and gauge the story they're trying to tell knowing now what we got from ep 11 and certain things that'll be said and things we'll see in ep 12. my instant response to that preview upon first watch was what?? no?? thats not it, its not happening, it cant be real. this is all a ruse, its a joke, its fake. but upon my rewatch, contextualising everything through a new lens knowing whats in that preview, i can see the narrative threads coming together. i dont exactly know how to put it into words at the moment bc its all still v fresh and raw, but its like... i see both resignation and defiance if that makes sense??? i see an acknowledgement and acceptance of all the facts plain and simple, both those that are wonderful and beautiful and those that are unfair and hurtful. them running away was always a break to process, never a solution, and thats what they have to do. they have to take it all in and slowly over the ep i do see a coming to terms. but they also come to terms with the extent of their love and commitment.

i've watched some scenes a couple of times, mainly the kiss and the scenes in the bed (not to objectify but bc i think they're honestly beautiful and resonated with me a lot), and upon multiple watches i saw them differently every time. i see it first as what it is simply, an act to reaffirm and express their love. but then i see it as a stolen moment to be that close before everything is torn away. then i see it as as an act of defiance, as in no matter what the world tries to take from them they cant change the fact they've had that, been that close, been together. then i see it as vulnerability, them being in a place, an environment that feels safe for them, being with a person they can trust whole heartedly to bare their soul to. and its a lot more things and i dont know what it meant to them, if it was none of these or all of these, but i guess what im trying to say is that this ep wasn't simply an ode to a relationship destined to be lost. in bittersweetness there's also kind of rebellion, bc bittersweet moments are made when you know you shouldnt do something but do it anyway. in this ep in all its emotional moments i see unbreakable and unparalleled strength. and you can predict from that what you like. you can believe that means they will not break up, they have a plan, they will not let the world separate them again. or you can believe that they break up but that strength will live on and be the life force that pulls them towards the inevitability of them coming back together. im not in the headspace for prediction, but the fact i can see that strength still is enough for me.

and to get back to your ask, i think i ultimately dont know what i 'choose' to believe. a fake break up almost feels too much like a punch in the face, like i dont want this to be solved with more lies and deceit, especially not from pat and pran who have always had that forced on them and vehemently tried to reject it. and it feels like a cop out to have such an emotionally heavy ep and leave us with those crumbs to have it be fake. i know they like to mislead and play us with previews sometimes, but we're at a place where i don't want to play games, not with this much at stake. so i believe its real, bc as much as that hurts, i can see it. i said before id accept a break up if it made narrative sense. and after ep 10 it didnt make narrative sense to me, but i think that was my optimism talking. i believed in that moment that these two boys wanted to take on the world and fight it, but the enemy has always felt too big. its like they saw the monster in the distance and felt strong enough to fight it, but when you're right in front of it and its 10x bigger than you and you're faced with something that feels insurmountable, i just... i dont want them to be blamed for being weak. not everyone can take everything on. theyve both had the weight of the world thrust upon their shoulders for too long and being together only makes the weight heavier in some ways, bc you want to carry it for that other person even if it crushes you. thats a horrid truth, and at some point exhaustion kicks in and you just have to remove yourself. you have to see the world beyond those two houses on that street and realise yes there's places we could be together but that life is more complicated than that, and beyond those houses is also university and work and friends and family and everything else.

thats the thing about love, and specifically pat and pran's love. its always been so self contained for them, and that amplifies that feeling of it being the be all and end all, the feeling its the most important feeling in the world. but from the outside you can never know what its like on the inside. you look at other's love as something simple, small, just another facet of life. we've been allowed inside and we see it for how huge it feels for them, and thats why its hard for us to reconcile with the fact that now they're letting it go for something else. happiness should not have to come at the expense of pain, but sometimes it does, so what do you do?? what do you do when all options lead to hurt?? when the world feels so hostile to everything you are and wanna be, whats the step forward?? whats the sacrifice you have to make?? i think that sacrifice is time. they dont want to sacrifice people, their families or each other, so they sacrifice time, with a belief that time is enough to fix, time can mend, time can reunite as it has before and when it comes, that the best way to defy the world is to not look back on the time lost, but the time you have ahead, where finally the brightness of the future can shine.

(sos this was soooo ranty but this is the first times im putting my thoughts into words and theyre very messy and emotionally charged and my head and heart are fistfighting but yeah... its a lot)