#much chloe vibes...

[asfdhgsdkjhgb]

btw i fully experienced a true blasting music very loud windows down driving the highway yesterday night and oh my god. i will be doing more of that this summer

[titsthedamnseason]

everyone lied to me about the bergman brothers these books are kind of bad

[i-like-anything-water]

beloved chlonette shippers, I have to ask. what's your hc for a Chlonette family/Chlonette parents with their (ridiculously) amazing kids?

[whimsicalcotton]

thoughts on 'tears don't fall' by bullet for my valentine? violet orlandi and lauren babic's cover of it has me envisioning a whole AMV for timelooping Max.

the slow rhythmic verses contrasted with the metal screaming feel like a great representation of her mental state.

while listening im basically that meme of that guy dramatically crouching on the beach, watching sand flow through his fingers (just like what Marrow!Max experienced with Chloe's jacket during the Lighthouse Incident amirite) while 4-5 versions of him in varying degrees of distress are superimposed on the side.

have a nice day! :D (casting a spell of blorbo-induced brainworms)

sdkfhhsdkfh oh hell yeah i have other ppl making mindpalace AMVs for this AU <3

also,

[iridescentis]

watched the life is strange live reveal I DON'T KNOW HOW TO FEEL

I really like the idea of the ending you chose impacting Max's thoughts and dialogue but I just can't see this working post bae ending

like all of this makes perfect sense with bay ending, Max starting fresh, not wanting to talk about her powers or remind herself of that time, completely new cast of characters with some mention to her past her and there yeah perfect

but I have no idea how they can write Max post bae ending and make it feel satisfying because Chloe being almost entirely out of the picture just doesn't make sense, like breaking them up just so you can start fresh for new audiences feels lazy

I think this game doesn't have to include Chloe, I think Max can exist without her in a narrative it just has to👏make 👏sense

For example, a possible explanation for her being gone: she's visiting David in Away. That ties in LiS2 and makes enough sense why the two would be separated. I wouldn't expect Chloe to just wait around while Max is living at a college, but give her something to do instead of breaking them up

I get the frustration that LiS shouldn't just be about pricefield but character wise, it doesn't make sense for the first game to push that these two people are cosmically intertwined only for them to break up after the game and barely be in each other's lives like what were we fighting for the whole time?? The whole emotional impact of that choice would be gone because it basically implies Max sacrificed a whole town for nothing

I'm not against this game, I think the concept for the story is really cool, I'm just not entirely convinced by how this fits with Max specifically

[mytrainline]

Deck nine you better not fuck this up this is a golden gift uve been given that Hannah Telle is back as Max its literally the only reason im getting it bc i like her a lot

[heraldofanclraste]

.

[vaultsixtynine]

hmm. i just realized roz and zari is a way better rendition of life is strange. complicated feelings being invoked by this realization

[valalice]

ུᩧ MULTI FANDOM TWITTER LINKS .ᐟ

ಇ instructions. before indulging, for the best experience and function of the links already be logged into your account.

features. some of your very favorites from arcane, the last of us, and life is strange.

warnings. these are porn links, viewer discretion is advised. strictly wlw. happy indulging, cuties!

a/n. as promised, here she is! thank you, each and every one of you amazing, beautiful, n lovely people. giving all 1,000 of you smooches on your foreheads <3

CAITLYN KIRAMMAN.

older gf!cait's punishment for you. she makes you work for it. milf!cait lets you ride her nipple. getting you worked up. her fingers reach all the right places. overstimulation & praise & cunt slapping. make her cum and she'll think about touching you later. she traps you. taking her strap. getting her upset, so now she has to fuck you over her desk. she's got you tied up ft. teasing & cunt slaps. her nighttime book got boring.

VI.

letting her pretty gf grind on her and let her grope her tits. mutual masturbation but you guys can't help touching each other. tit sucking & thigh grinding & fingering. she's a moaner. using her fingers. she's not done yet. fingering you while she uses a vibe on herself. you treat her good ft. fingering & cunt slapping. she loves missionary. tempo.

SEVIKA.

she takes it slow with you. she doesn't need to get up for air. big mama. reverse cowgirl. messy makeout. letting her rest after a hard day. strap so good she makes you cream on her. keeping you down. tribbing with sevi. she can be sweet. making you squirt on her strap.

JINX.

she loves to sit on your face. playing with your tits. making you dumb on her strap. shes's obsessed with you. she was being a brat, so you put her in her place. grinding and vibe. she's giddy. putting a plug in her and denying her. the only time she'll ever shut up.

MEL MEDARDA.

strapping her for the first time. sharing a double ended dildo. tribbing. she fucks you and looks good while doing so. prettiest pussy ever. she's been busy with the council lately, but she makes it up to you. making a mess. reminding you who makes you feel this good.

ABBY ANDERSON.

you guys are at it all night. she loves to eat. she loves you so much. you missed each other. riding your face ft. choking & tit play. grinding and feeling up on each other. bouncing back on it. tribbing with abs. she finally has her room to herself. you're not running from it. ass groping. she couldn't wait to get her hands on you.

ELLIE WILLIAMS.

mornings with her. pt2. taking what you want. what she sends you when she's desperate. she loves making you guys kiss. she's a squirter. distracting streamer!ellie. she's a finger banger ft. tit sucking. going on a picnic. maintaining eye contact. tasting yourself on her fingers. she loves having a pretty girl on top of her. you promise gamer!ellie that if she wins you'll let her cum. intimate moments.

CHLOE PRICE.

she's high and all she wants to do is munch . . . on you. hope you guys don't get caught in the woods. fingering you while she's driving. you're supposed to stay quiet. you and her have an agreement. the movie got boring. you don't have any money, so you'll have to repay dealer!chloe some other way. the house is empty.

please, let me know if any links aren't working!

[lucientheartisticfox]

whenever i see something about which ship for a character is better i'm always just like, "why not both?" bc polyamory. like, every ship war ever could be fixed by just. making the characters poly. bc then you can have both! especially since not everyone in a poly relationship has to be dating! so if you ever can't pick between ships, just do both!

[kissoflightning]

Are you going to tell us the name of the fic?!

honestly I don’t consume much chloe x connor content, but I saw ONE amazing fic with them and they are permanently etched into my skull

my anatomy is assburgers but we ball 🏀

[bubsmiraculousau]

These r my first brainstorm pages for the ot5 civillian miraculous designs! Some of their styles I imagine would shift throughout the hypothetical series, esp Adrien and Marinette.

Adrien dresses like a little businessman, preppy in the most direct sense of the word, was taught to dress well to leave a good impression. Gabriel believes that every man should just wear a suit all the time, so Adrien's sweaters and khakis are a compromise. He basically only wears neutrals.

Marinette dresses in mainly pink, but dabbles in other colors as well. I think she would always have some kind of comfortable fabric on, and customizes her clothing with embroidery and things like that. I think she also just likes all the rainbow colors too.

Chloe is a true y2k girlie, Megan Fox's character's outfits from confessions of a teenage drama queen is her vibe. Blue, yellow, brown/beige, b&w, are her main look.

Ngl I have no idea what to do with Nino he just dresses like a guy. I think he's the most comfortable in looser clothing. I try to incorporate green into his outfits to tie into the turtle miraculous and him being friends with Adrien. His in-show design literally has like every color in it probably to tie all the characters into each other but it kills me to draw that lol. I'm much better with designing women's clothes...

Alya has tumblr girl style. She loves a black graphic tee and takes black and white pictures of her converse. She basically dresses like the girls I thought were so cool in middle school. Like c'mon she has a blog and Balayage hair, what other style would she be? (Also random fact but when I heard of 'twee' style I thought it just meant all Tumblr girl style not just the peter pan collar stuff lol) I think people call it Tumblr grunge as well? idk

I have a different updated lineup of the civilian classmates and I might make individual posts describing their vibe, background, inspiration, and style because fashion is very important w my characters lol. xx

[ordinary-barbie]

bad moon rising.

pairing: saxon ratliff x fem!reader

word count: 1.2k

summary: It's the night of the Full Moon Party, and you just knew some shit was about to go down.

tags: language, suggestive references, drug use, established relationship, mentions of infidelity but no cheating happens, Chloe being manipulative, pet names (baby and baby), reader is protective towards the Ratliff boys, rewriting canon basically

note: fic title from the song by Creedence Clearwater Revival. also I hope this is good lmao but I wanted to try my hand at rewriting something from canon!

Even though tonight was supposed to be a celebration, you couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to happen—and it wouldn't be good.

Your best friend always teased you about your innate ability to suss out the vibes of a situation, calling it your "tingling spidey-sense." You wished you could turn it off because this was a vacation. You were supposed to be having fun with your hot boyfriend, Saxon, at a luxe resort in beautiful Thailand, not worrying that shit might go down tonight.

When Chloe had invited you, Saxon, and Lochlan to party on Gary's yacht later, you felt something twist in your gut. Every cell in your body told you to say no—but Saxon and Lochlan wanted to go, and there's no way in hell you were gonna let the boys go alone. Chelsea seemed sweet, but there was something about Chloe you just didn't trust.

You'd seen how she'd looked at the brothers all afternoon, how there seemed to be a predatory glint to her gaze. You weren't worried about Saxon cheating—he was way too down bad for you to even think of straying. But you knew that probably wouldn't stop Chloe from trying. And Lochlan had become like a younger brother to you, so you felt it was your duty to look out for him.

A few hours later, it was time to meet with Chloe and Chelsea. When you emerged from the bathroom of your and Saxon's shared bedroom wearing a black bikini top and a teal sarong you'd tied into a skirt, your boyfriend gasped, taking a minute to drink it all in.

"Do we have to go to this party?" Saxon muttered, busying himself by pulling you close to him and leaving open-mouthed kisses against your neck.

You were totally down to spend the night wrapped up in bed with Saxon, but you weren't going to ditch Lochlan and leave him alone with Chloe. "Baby, we already promised we'd go. We can have our own fun later," you assured your boyfriend.

You felt Saxon's smirk against the nape of your neck. "Holding you to that promise, babe."

-

The night started off well, if a little chaotic. The city streets were filled with revelers, and you allowed yourself to be swept into the fray, enjoying the street food, neon paint, and the thumping bass of music blasting from the bars. You'd taken loads of photos with Saxon, Lochlan, and Chelsea (on Saxon's phone because you were a goody two-shoes rule follower) but also made sure to unplug and soak up the moment because when would you ever get to do something like this again?

Then Chloe brought out a little baggie with some pills, and your "spidey sense" started tingling again.

Chelsea gamely took one of the pills, but you declined before Chloe could ever offer you one.

Chloe groaned. "Come on, it's the Full Moon Party! Have a little fun."

"I said 'no,' Chloe," you firmly said, smiling politely.

"Okay then," Chloe said, turning to Saxon.

"I don't take drugs—I am the drug," he replied confidently. You couldn't help but giggle at your massive dork of a boyfriend.

"Saxon, Lochy, don't be boring," Chloe said, pouting. You stiffened, not appreciating the indirect shot at you. Saxon noticed how tense you were and rubbed soothing circles on the back of your palm.

"Nah, I'm good," Saxon demurred.

"Wow, you're so whipped," Chloe teased. "Lochlan? You in?"

Lochlan shrugged, taking one of the drugs before you could stop him. Saxon squeezed your hand reassuringly. "I'm sure he'll be okay," he said, knowing how much you worried, though your chest still felt tight with anxiety.

Chloe and Chelsea were giggling, ready to continue the party back on the yacht. You sighed, feeling so tired but even more determined than ever to look out for Lochy.

-

The vibe totally shifted once the five of you were back on the boat. Chloe, Chelsea, and Lochlan turned into a giggly mess. Chloe and Chelsea decided to kiss, probably out of boredom. Lochlan, high out of his mind, watched the two of them with rapt interest.

Chloe beckoned Lochlan to come closer, and that was the last straw for you. "Leave him alone," you said. "He's clearly high off of whatever the fuck drug you gave him and I can't let you take advantage of him."

Chloe looked peeved. "You've had a stick up your ass ever since I brought out the drugs. Lochlan is 18; he doesn't need a babysitter. We're just having fun."

"Party's gotta end sometime," you replied, shrugging your shoulders. "I don't give a shit if that makes me a killjoy or someone with a stick up my ass. I'm trying not to make this trip something he'll regret."

"Lochy, come here," Chloe purred. "Your brother and his girlfriend might be lame, but you don't have to be."

Lochlan looked between you and Chloe, feeling unsure. You knew the boy was a people pleaser, but he also looked up to you and Saxon a lot.

Saxon cleared his throat, standing alongside you. "Yeah, it's getting lowkey weird in here now," he said. "Let's go, Lochy."

Chloe scoffed. "You've got to be kidding me."

Lochlan stood up, ultimately deciding to join you and Saxon. You slung a protective arm around the younger boy, glaring at Chloe. "We're leaving. Thanks for the invite, but I think we've had enough fun."

Chelsea smiled sadly, enveloping you in a hug. She really seemed like a lovely girl, and it sucked that Chloe managed to have her under her spell. "See you around?" she asked, and you nodded.

Then you and the boys got the hell off of that yacht. You were relieved to have listened to your gut. Nothing good would've come from staying on that boat—you were sure of it.

-

You and Saxon spent the next few hours watching over Lochlan. You listened patiently as he rambled on about whatever came to mind and kept a constant eye on him, worried that he'd find a way to escape and put himself in harm's way. You and Saxon were relieved when Lochlan finally fell asleep, instantly collapsing into your shared bed and snoozing until lunch.

You and Saxon were sitting on the balcony, eating some fruit, when Lochlan came in, looking a tad groggy. "I totally blacked out last night," he mumbled. "What happened?"

"Nothing much," Saxon replied smoothly.

"You got high so we decided to take you back here," you said. "You were very interested in recounting the entire timeline of the Marvel Cinematic Universe to me and your brother."

Lochlan groaned, rubbing a hand across his face. "I didn't do anything else stupid, did I?"

"Nah," you reassured Lochlan. "I wasn't gonna let anything happen to you."

"Well, thanks," Lochlan said with a grin. "I'm gonna go get some water."

Once Lochlan was back inside, Saxon looked fondly at you. "Is it weird that I think you're hot when you're all protective like this?"

You felt your face grow warm—Saxon still knew how to make you flustered even after a year of dating. "So I'm not your 'boring' girlfriend?" you teasingly asked.

"Hell no. Fuck Chloe," Saxon said, capturing your lips in a kiss.

You were glad to feel more at ease now. Saxon and Lochlan were your boys, and you refused to let anything happen to them. The Ratliff family was a bit of a mess, but they were your mess, and you'd look out for them no matter what.

[creatingblackcharacters]

Hi, I wanted your opinion on giving Black (USAmerican) characters culturally Black first names.

I understand Black people can and do have any kind of name that they or their parents choose, but in my own racial experience, I hate when a work has Latino characters but none of them have Latino first names, for example. I'd like to give my Black characters authentic first names, but I don't want to make up a "Black sounding" name and I don't know where to start looking for real frequently used names.

I also believe that names hint at what type of vibe a character has, like a "Timmy" having a different personality to a "Chad" if that makes sense. I'm not sure which name gives off which vibe when it comes to Black American names.

Is this a reasonable thing to consider? And if so, do you have any resources on Black names? Anything from baby name websites to studies on the history of Black American first names would be helpful. I specify "Black American" because while I also have Black Latino characters, I'm familiar with naming trends and meanings for that demographic. Thank you for your advice!

Changing one’s name might be one of the most American things a Black person can do, emblematic of one of the country’s most enduring, if elusive, promises: that where you begin isn’t necessarily where you must end.

One can find themselves introduced to the world as Chloe Anthony Wofford and exit it as Toni Morrison, or begin life as Gloria Jean Watkins and conclude it as bell hooks.

Behind a name lies an expanse of motivations, possibilities and intentions. A name, chosen, repeated and stubbornly asserted, can point to reclamation, remembrance and self-determination, as it did for many kidnapped and enslaved Africans who fought to hold fast to their homelands. For enslaved Americans running away to emancipate themselves, a name change could be just as much about security as self-possession.

I understand your question, but I feel like by asking what is "specifically Black American" you are forgetting that "Black American" would still be a melting pot of names because we are a melting pot of people, with lots of historical and cultural events having an effect on the names we choose- even if it's not as structured as it might be in Latin America. I think by trying to do what you're saying here (like "names that have vibes"), you have a good chance of slipping into stereotypes and I'm not comfortable encouraging you to think that way. Black Americans often gift their children names that signify what they wish for their child, or how they feel about them- pick a name with some strong meaning, and have that character embody (or struggle against) that!

Try watching these, and see if you have any more questions!

[rancidhomo]

In regards to Saxon and Lochlan's sexual dynamic, the defining representation of it for me thus far are the shots of them on each side of the bed, Saxon overcome with ecstasy and Lochlan genuinely delighted when he was able to get Saxon to cum. The sexual dynamic is a mirror reflection of the overarching dynamic between them as brothers raised in the way they were raised and as two people who love each other. I think it's really compelling, and it's why I don't understand the perspective that one of the brothers not matching the sexual desire of the other somehow diminishes the shock impact of what's happening between them, makes it any less unnatural, or generally just takes the thrill out of it for people who get pleasure from contemplating taboo relationships (particularly queer ones).

I truly haven't yet gotten any indication of sexual desire from Lochlan (not for Saxon or Chloe or anyone). He seems a little ace to me in the way he gives off vibes about being curious more as an outsider or accessory, not motivated by the thought of sex but happy to entertain Saxon's obsession with it because he loves him and wants to be a part of his interests. I think at this point sex is just a physical activity to him the same as, like, playing tennis, and that's why he is contemplative rather than alarmed by Saxon's subconscious desire for him.

E.g. my interpretation of the bedroom stare is that Lochlan was in that moment putting the pieces together after a particularly bizarre and telling conversation with his brother. He is recognizing that a lot of Saxon's interactions with him are driven by an unconscious lust and romantic attachment to him (Saxon trying so hard to be integral to a highly individual/personal life event like Lochlan losing his virginity, talking graphically about sex in relation to both himself and Lochlan, and walking nude to the bathroom after making it explicitly clear that he was going to masturbate, are all very revealing attempts to influence the scope/boundaries of Lochlan's perception and engagement with him). That moment to me felt like Lochlan saying "all right...he obviously wants me to consider this. is this something i would want to pursue?"

The hand job felt more like the performance of a loving, helpful deed rather than a lust-driven encounter on Lochlan's side, but for Saxon it looked much more sultry and desirous. The vibes felt so different to me on each side of the bed. Lochlan isn't really showing any signs of being affected by physical pleasure or desire and is more just Performing an Activity, while Saxon is clearly overwhelmed by his pleasure and desire (being brought to climax specifically when he became cognizant that it was Lochlan who was sexually engaged with him).

While Lochlan's sexual activity as we've seen it doesn't seem to include the presence of sexual desire for others or a strong response to physical sexual pleasure, he is still satisfying a specific part of himself by engaging in it (that's to say, I don't think he does it out of pressure from outside influences, but rather to serve a specific and intense self-driven internal impulse). I don't think Lochlan was at all interested in Chloe, and that his primary motivation that night was to share an experience with Saxon that would be resonant for him. The strong self-driven impulse he's serving by doing that is chasing the gratification he gets when he makes the people he loves feel good.

So while the sexual encounter with Saxon doesn't seem to be driven by physical lust to me on Lochlan's side, I do think that the emotional and mental pleasure he derived from the experience was just as intense as the orgasmic/sexual pleasure Saxon got out of it. I imagine that in the future, sex would end up being a worthwhile activity for Lochlan specifically as a means to feel those exceptional feelings he gets when others are pleased by him - and that outcome would be just as significant to him as someone having sex for the orgasm and/or romantic gratification it could provide. Lochlan seems so unencumbered and delighted in the moment that Saxon cums, with his whole experience showing the same buildup and euphoria pay off as Saxon's orgasm.

I think it's also relevant in their situation to consider how their genuine love for each other is elevating the gratification they're getting from sharing this physical experience together. Saxon in particular seems to be gravitationally drawn to and in love with Lochlan as a person in a way he hasn't felt for anyone else. There is a special type of romanticizing of Lochlan that he's doing as a result of the unique kindness and adoration he receives from Lochlan that makes him feel like the golden idolized older brother, and more generally, like a compelling person that is worth loving.

Literally no one else makes him feel this way. Lochlan is positioned uniquely in contrast to Piper and probably every woman Saxon has ever met who thinks he's fucking awful. But Lochlan knows him better than anyone and still wants to be close to him. Nearly all of Saxon's actions in the narrative thus far are motivated by an intense longing to receive gestures of romantic, loving intimacy from Lochlan - because clearly intimacy is something that is grossly absent in his day-to-day life, and that has made him desperate for it. Saxon is obsessed with Lochlan and preserving the unique function that Lochlan serves in his life: being the only human in the world who finds Saxon lovable and worthwhile.

For Lochlan, I think the distinction between types of love (platonic, romantic, familial) doesn't really hold any significance to him when it comes to how he experiences it, something that was probably influenced by the love vacuum he grew up in as the youngest child alone in a huge house with neglectful absent parents. He is just desperate to be loved at all in any way, and to feel like his existence is important (if not critical) to someone else in order for that person to be happy in life.

In the most tragic and off-putting of ways, their circumstances and experiences have molded them into perfect compliments to each other's damage. Specifically, their parents' neglect and unconscious abuse made it an extremely likely outcome that they would develop an unnatural co-dependent bond.

Saxon has a strong and confident personality as a result of his dad-manufactured sense of identity and purpose. His parents inculcated him in a toxic wealth-driven environment characterized by soulless beliefs and behaviors that turned him into a terrible, useless, unlovable person. His wealth and physical attractiveness are bound to get him a lot of attention and draw people to him initially, but his inner character is so awful that it must drive people away rather quickly. Anyone that does stay with him probably does it for the social or financial advantages it provides them. But ultimately, he isn't capable of generating sincere intimacy with another person no matter how much he craves it. The conditions of his life and identity don't allow it. He distracts himself from that fact with superficial, empty experiences with people, but never achieves anything close to fulfillment or self-actualization.

While their father clearly put effort into molding Saxon into a Tim 2.0, both parents appear to have stopped trying to be an active parent by the time Lochlan came along. The lack of interest in cultivating his personality has contributed to his struggle with finding identity, purpose, and self-recognition. He is deeply lonely and awkward in his struggle to connect with others.

This is what's at the heart of the complimentary contrast for me: Saxon's day-to-day life is filled with attention from others that only serves to highlight how starving he is for intimacy and how inept he is at cultivating it in reality. It's like dreaming that you're eating from a buffet but continuing to feel the ache of starvation as you go. Lochlan, on the other hand, receives no attention at all and is desperate for someone to take an interest in him.

At this point in his life, Lochlan has hinged his identity on an abstract sense of purpose that's sort of like Schrodinger's cat. Do I have meaning? I can only know that if someone is looking at me. Will I ever feel good in life? I'll never be anything if I can't compel someone to love me. How do I get people to love me and see me? My purpose, my function, is to increase my value in the eyes of others by any means so that they become attached to me and maybe one day they'll love me as much as I need them to. I will never feel satisfied if I don't keep grinding for the love and attention of others.

I think a big factor in Saxon's damage that has him latching onto Lochlan specifically is all the self-suffocating he's been doing to squash his homosexual urges, which is still a taboo in the Southern conservative culture he was raised in. Not just the self-suffocation, but also committing to a soulless toxic pursuit of pleasure that doesn't make him feel good, with women whose basic dignity he doesn't respect. That confluence of having to constantly sustain a backwards demeaning serial predatory sexual lifestyle, and the hideous unwanted lure of the taboo that he has worked so hard to ignore, has left him obsessive-compulsively sexualizing his brother in ways he seems to not have been cognizant of until the wake of the threesome. He has tragically become irreversibly aware of the most taboo taboo that he could commit (gay incest!) and he knows it gets him off. I'm sure that going hard with Adderall all day isn't helping with his compulsive agonizing about it.

Underneath it all, Saxon is starving and desperate to receive romantic love, and Lochlan is eager and happy to give anything at all if it means it will increase his value in Saxon's eyes and his standing in his life, which in turn will increase Lochlan's sense of purpose and selfhood. I feel like we have seen glimpses of Saxon's veneration/adoration of Lochlan, e.g. the near-religious ecstasy on his face when Lochlan runs his fingers through his hair, receiving Lochlan's kiss from below him like Lochlan is a god bestowing a blessing, and the way that no matter what he is talking about or doing, if Lochlan is there his eyeline will always be squarely focused on him.

Saxon will always be intensely worshipful and adoring of Lochlan no matter how big or small Lochlan's loving gestures, and always with a sense of gratitude exacerbated to extremes by a lifelong scarcity of intimacy. This is exactly the batshit intensity and devotion that Lochlan needs to continuously feed on to feel alive. Receiving the thrilling electricity of tangible love and affection from a compulsively generous person who sincerely cares for him is exactly the faith-giving, life-affirming meaning that Saxon needs in order to feel like life is worth living beyond the empty ideals that define him. In a universe where Saxon would be able to fully surrender to this way of living despite the moral taboo of it, and despite the explosive volatility of the situation should they be discovered, them choosing each other would be endlessly viable for them. If they let themselves anchor their sense of identity to each other, they would always match each other's intensity no matter how excessive or damaging, in a truly insane self-sustaining and self-consuming loop.

The supremely disturbing nuance that would be imbued to an already disturbing narrative by having Lochlan not reciprocate or match Saxon's sexual desire is so compelling to me and makes the idea of a sustained sexual relationship between them that much more disorienting. Insisting that the reason they're doing the things they're doing as a result of innate sexual desire for each other point blank is so boring to me.

I do think that they are morbid soulmates, but in a world where soulmates are made while you're here, not before you arrive in it. The conditions of Saxon's life turned him into a piece of shit, enforced the practice of toxic heterosexual masculinity, suffocated his queerness, and left him performing hypersexual posturing as a deflection. I don't think that Saxon would have harbored incestuous sexual urges for a brother if he had been raised in less toxic, amoral, and oppressive conditions, but his upbringing and what it made him has ostracized him from the rest of the world in a critical way, and Lochlan is the only lifeline he has. I don't think that Lochlan would have been willing to engage in a sexual relationship with a sibling just to feel seen if he hadn't been raised in isolation by parents who never cared much about him, but his upbringing and what it made him has ostracized him from the rest of the world in a critical way, and Saxon is the only lifeline he has. Their separate circumstances have fundamentally, harmfully impacted their development as human beings in different ways that would allow for perfect synchronicity when joined together. They will always be ripe to fall into a fucked up, insane position that has them feeding off each other's insecurities, perpetuating a cycle that will continuously augment their mutual need and obsession with each other, and it's going to be so fucking insane to see if they choose to resist that fact or give into it.

[raelis1]

via @batsplat

speaking of smallville now that was certainly a show. how many seasons did you manage and when is it best to stop? I am currently at s2 and already I would kill every other character for lex, wyd it’s only gonna get worse 😭

lmaooo okay so I got to. six. which actually kinda kills me because I swear I poured my heart and my soul into that stupid show, it drove me insane it left me a lesser person and I BARELY GOT HALFWAY

my basic analysis of the default journey with that show that I'm going to pretend is universal is like. it hooks you with something compelling in s1 and you still have enough naive faith to give it benefit of doubt that the writers actually know what they're doing, because you just wanted to have a bit of fun but, hey, these characters are actually more interesting than you expected!! then in s2 you're starting to get doubts but you're already kinda too deep. then s3 breaks your sanity and makes you scream and at this point you just see how far this shit goes. then s4 is.... mid..... but is also in a way the last remotely palpable season? and then at some point in s5 you're just like. wow I don't even enjoy the hate watching any more. and s6 is. yeah. eventually there was one storyline that is so insanely uncomfortable that it's just. enough. enough!

[mild spoilers to follow]

if s2 drives you insane on lex grounds then!! boy!! s3!! the thing about s3 from lex's pov is that. okay it's extremely angsty and does increasingly radicalise you... I have to say I started this show in a very innocent jokey 'oh ho ho I heard they have some good superman/lex luthor queerbait in that noughties show!!' and was ready to be a lex fan like. as a bit. and y'know my readiness to adopt morally dubious characters is pretty high anyway. but the first few seasons made me go?? okay but he genuinely isn't even the villain?? like I'm not even saying this for the bit, he LITERALLY is not the bad guy in this story?? guys??? and then by the end of season 3 I had been completely radicalised to the 'Actually Lex Luthor Should Turn Evil And Kill All Of You People And I Will Cheer Him On' stance. but what really, really, really kills me is that after all that, they still manage to bungle his transition to evil. like, they ignore all the very obvious reasons for why lex would turn evil after all that, and just come up with completely new ones? that have fuck all to do with this character you've been writing up to that point?

and the worst bit. the WORST bit. is that after all that, he literally does not even have fun being evil. like, you know that season one episode where he's being mind controlled and does his gay little swagger. this scene, yeah:

first of all, again, they ended up erasing lex's canonical motivation for turning evil, which is being so queer-coded he might as well be wearing a sign with slurs around his neck while he's stuck in a small town in fucking kansas. like "you think I don't see the way your parents look at me? the way half the town looks at me?" okay, great, love how this entire arc is eventually concluded by having the show say the entire town including clark's small-minded parents were 100% right to be suspicious of him, that there was something fundamentally defect with him basically from birth and he was always going to turn out to be evil. I feel like you definitely thought through the implications of what you wrote here!

but never mind all that, my actual point is that lex is having fun here!! this is one of several episodes where they're 'foreshadowing' lex turning evil by 'having a paranormal reason to make lex evil for a few minutes' (some subtle writing, this), and he's generally having a lot of fun with it!! he's leaning into the camp of it all!! he's freed from all his nasty and completely unnecessary inhibitions like 'not killing everyone in smallville' which. good. and he's just having a great time. and then he becomes a villain and he's literally just miserable all the time!! it sucks!! like omg if you're going to butcher his writing and ruin the character then at LEAST let him have some fucking fun?? at least let him experience joy at his own depravity or whatever? like he doesn't even get to do any fun villain monologues at clark, he's literally just sad clark isn't his friend any more while clark is giving him the homophobic dog slur. and then also about twice a season something paranormal happens to clark and he physically assaults lex to the point where he like, almost kills him, and then after that everyone pretends it didn't happen and clark never apologises and continues to burst into his room demanding answers. like omg?? lex, they hate you anyway, can you please just attempt to shoot clark?? also, obviously the turn to villainy should have been in large part motivated by lex finding out clark's secret and going?? the fuck is wrong with you for not just SAYING this?? (plus finding out everything clark did to lex in season three to keep his secret like it's genuinely so fucked up #lmao) but. I hate to break bad news to you about where we're at with the whole 'does lex know clark's secret yet' situation at the point where I gave up. genuinely what is the point of all this building and perfectly interesting character work if you're NEVER gonna deliver

but quite possibly an even worse sin of the later seasons that genuinely broke my brain was the treatment of lex's father. like, not to give the game away too much here, but the show's philosophical stance on rotten apples ends up being.... well. it's interesting which characters this show feels is worthy of redemption!! also interesting when they retcon several seasons of writing for the show that already very much set up why a character would actually perfectly legitimately go insane and instead settle for 'well his father sure did know there was always something wrong with him'!! watching some season 3 and season 5 episodes back to back would leave your face scarred from the amount of whiplash in the writing. the whole thing's kinda incompetent and dumb but is also like?? actively a little bit evil when you really think about the implications of what they're writing here

anyway. it's a brave stance on superman to go 'okay but what is being a superhero really about if not a whole whole lot of gaslighting'. and I do love the clark stalking room!! but the problem is, they could've played the clark/lex dynamic in a kinda tragic 'wow clark really has been so blinded by his parents that he's gonna end up destroying his relationship to lex because he just can't be honest with him and lex really needed one person in his corner who actually trusted him but clark wasn't the right person to provide that' way. they could've played it in a sort of fun 'yeah this is kinda fucked up and weird and toxic how they simply cannot stop doing dubious shit to each other' way where you just kinda roll with how terrible the whole thing is. but they don't go for either of those!! they're so stuck with treating clark's parents as the moral centre of the universe, with their "marriage is SACRED, clark" schtick and all that (yeah, there's an episode where clark gets lectured about the importance of the bond of marriage, this is a thing that happens) that they're blatantly unaware of what story they're telling but ALSO just refuse to lean into the batshit insane elements and just have!! fun!! and it's one of those things where you really do feel like an idiot for even thinking about this stupid fucking show so!! much!! but I swear, I swear they had a dynamic that hit like crazy in season one... also some of the fic out there for them is CRAZY like it kinda does make it all worth it but still!! still!! this shit infuriates me!!

anyway, here are some bonkers plot bits I remember happening in this show for you to enjoy if you continue in this endeavour:

the lex luthor slut shaming episode

clark kent slut shaming lex luthor, which is conceptually funny anyway but becomes funnier if you just read it as clark being unable to figure out he is actually just subliminally attracted to his friend. like, okay, clark being disappointed at lex for sleeping with thirteen different women, I see you

like. multiple lesbian lana moments. she's constantly getting herself in lesbian situations. and I get this is some kinda weird fanservice-y shit from the showrunners but, sue me, I thought lesbian vampire lana was cute

which is a thing that happens

they get spike from btvs to tell clark vampires aren't real, which is the one funny thing they wrote in about a season

the native american stuff is always deeply uncomfortable but it becomes even weirder when they invent some native american prophecy *deep sigh* to explain how lex was always evil

clark steals a car from lex several episodes after committing like, one of the most obscene acts of betrayal it is possible to commit against a friend (lex is unaware of this and possibly never finds out? I think the writers maybe forgot about this.) and lex is just like. it's fine <3 I know friends sometimes have to do crazy shit for other friends!! you're my friend, right?? and clark goes... yeah. sure

I vaguely remember lex buying stuff the american football high school team at some point and showing up to the lockers to give a speech and it's just?? this is right after the friendship break up and it's basically lex talking right at clark and he's talking about the importance of fresh starts and it is so fucking funny

the one episode where lana is in paris. they had built up to this for ages as like a whole thing where lana finally frees herself from that miserable town and all the people in it (don't ask how the 'lana knowing clark's secret' situation develops. it doesn't) and then she's there for. one episode

martha kent tells clark how they can't harbour illegal immigrants at one stage?? she eventually changes her mind I think but what even was that all about

the papa kent goes into politics arc. shoot me

lex becomes like. possessed by zod. which somehow manages to make everyone involved more dull

silver kryptonite makes clark paranoid, which ends up being pretty funny because he genuinely talks the exact same way

lex thinks clark can throw him across the room because he's been hypnotised

lex starts capturing various clark super powered friends and delivers these gay villain monologues to them (like genuinely, in one of them he's got shirtless aquaman strapped to a gurney and he's like, leaning over him, teasing him with a glass of water) and they're some of the best bits of the show

clark discovers the clark stalking room, which I will say was very funny

chloe basically saying lex always sends clark these massive gifts as a way of keeping his affections which?? clearly true but I thought we were keeping that the subtext

clark gatecrashes lex's wedding high on red kryptonite

one of lex's old bullies gets killed by like, a statue falling from the top of the building they're standing next to and stabbing the guy and then some of the blood splashes on lex and he's just like ?? bleh. fantastic scene

and THEN there's several scenes with his father where lex is like 'well that sure was a nice shirt :(' and lex's father is berating him for his lack of humanity. or something

there's an episode where lex is split into good lex and evil lex and it's genuinely the only worthwhile thing the show did that season. like the writing is still kinda incoherent but, crucially. it sure is fun

the spirit of lex's mum tells him she thinks he sucks

worst show in existence. I'll never forget it