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spnasylum · 5 years ago

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My notes while listening to Misha’s comments on the podcast: (grab a snack!)

In light of the most recent fandom drama I decided to listen to *that* podcast and take notes as I went along about what was actually said and then give my take on it as objectively as possible. This is basically an essay so strap in!

He complains about not getting a trailer on set that’s the same as Jared and Jensen’s. Even though he has one that can accommodate 3 people. This was the first point of discussion inspired by opening up the interview with a brief chat about Misha currently being in his camper van and how he’s sleeping in it even though he’s still home in Bellingham. The whole hour and 26 minutes has an undertone of complaining and ego stroking by all involved.

Says he’s sad he didn’t get to be there for the final days of filming.

Seems a little nervous about if friendships made during the shows run will last now it’s over.

Admits he has no plan in place or anything coming up career wise and he’s unsure of his future. This is where he brings up Walker and The Boys and says if he had shows like that to go to he wouldn’t feel SPN ending was so monumental. It is said with a slight tone of bitterness.

Side note: the hosts Alaina and Malik seem to be fine with running with the narrative that Misha was part of the show it’s entire 15 year run. Misha clears this up eventually by saying he joined in season 4.

Misha says that he realized about six years ago that SPN could run as “we” wanted it to, implying he has any say in keeping the show going or not. He asserts that he would have been on the show up until the very end in any case. But he didn’t feel that way the first few years he was on the show. So that makes me think something or someone involved gave him the feeling he could be confident in being in the cast for however long SPN aired. Maybe this was after Sera left? Maybe this was when he agreed to a significant pay cut and demotion? Either way it seems he felt SPN = job security.

Misha doubts he’ll have the feeling of job security again.

Says from around age 11 he wanted to be a politician.

Says he saw “successful, untalented” actors and decided “I can do that”. He realized that was naive and it’s actually not easy to be that successful and by the time he got his career going he was basically just in it for the fame it’s not anything he took seriously.

We find out his wife did a doctorate in gender history... for some reason.

That Marilyn Monroe was some sort of baseline for him about creating a public persona (🤷🏽‍♀️) except for getting cosmetic surgery he points out.

Talk about how he got started. Acting classes, improve groups. Moving between Chicago, DC and LA.

Discussion about the differences and similarities between Hollywood and Washington.

States he got a consultant to help him cultivate a fan base and image to connect with an audience after getting on SPN. Admits that was a double edged sword because an anonymous public start thinking that they really know you and things start getting weird.

Mentions trying to find a balancing act of being authentic and having a private life but still keeping your fans.

He admits that the fan base he grew for himself by seeming accessible has caused him to attract people who don’t have any boundaries. This is when he claims the “dialing it back” in regard to how much he shares and mentions his kids specifically as something he doesn’t feel comfortable with putting out there. Uses the word “unhinged” to describe them.

Malik mentions “crazy fans” who seem to know too much about you and finding out where you are etc. Using the example of fans turning up at an airport wanting autographs and you wondering how they even knew you’d be there and what flight you taking. He asks Misha to share experiences about his own crazy fans.

This is when Misha uses the example about having fans who think that when he tweets something out he’s communicating with them personally.

Alaina then says that in the Supernatural fandom people fight each other to protect Jared, Jensen and Misha and it’s “very bizarre”. She volunteered that people think Misha secretly hates Jared and that it’s not true. Not sure why she decided to direct the conversation to a place that would cause drama and give Misha a chance to play victim.

And then...

That’s when he claims that he was public enemy number one with super fans of the show because he’s taking attention away from Jared and Jensen.

That’s when he brings up the alleged organized attack to take down his Facebook account. He says they reported him for... *pauses... claims to not know what. But that whatever it was “Facebook bought it and took it down”. Facebook deleted/deactivated his account but he eventually got it back.

Side note: Facebook (like all social media) have always been bias when it comes to people with leftist views and let them have free reign on the platform. So he must have done something that they would decide to suspend him. I don’t think J2 fans can be blamed for the content he posts and if it violated any ToS. As we know he can post some inappropriate things on social media.

He then brings up the allegations of him taking money out of his organization. Stating it’s “categorically untrue” is all he brings forward as evidence to the contrary.

Side note: I don’t know why then that there’s no receipts or transparency. Why is his mother a beneficiary, why do people who mention he owns Stands get blocked, why set everything up in Delaware and have your for profit and so called non profit interests so entangled etc etc) I guess fans are just supposed to have faith and take his word for it.

He says that ALL of them (Jared, Jensen and himself) have people who hate them in the fandom. But overall the fandom is lovely and supportive of the cast and each other. Makes an attempt at stating there’s no kind of competition or animosity between he and Jared. I think this is like the 3rd or 4th time in the interview either he or Alaina bring up Jared but keep the focus on how Misha is the one facing “character assassination.”

Finally says that all of them have nasty things done to them and they all have had to consult security because of threats to their families etc, doesn’t specify which faction of the fandom that’s coming from. Mentions people filing police reports in the fandom but doesn’t say regarding who or what. Alaina reacts like it’s the first time hearing of this happening. Misha just goes “yeah!” Then they move on to talking about living situations.

Apparently Alaina and Misha were neighbors in LA but didn’t take advantage of that. She doesn’t live in LA anyone, wants a new adventure.

Misha mentions Bellingham is another thing about his future he’s unsure about and how his kids flourished there.

Brings up not being present with his kids even when he’s home because of work and side projects and that the one thing he’s enjoying right now it spending time with them. That he used to operate from a place of guilt because his kids felt like they only have one parent. He and Malik briefly spoke on how their careers have negatively affected their love lives.

Misha says he’s not really involved with Random Acts or running it anymore. (Ummm... what)

He and Alaina discuss Haiti and Nicaragua for a while.

Says he may try to get into directing. Says he likes having creative control. Mentions he likes doing his art installations.

Admits that getting a bit of success made him very entitled and wanting of special treatment. But claims he’s trying to keep that in check (where?) and he’s just like everyone else (well duh!). But he “trades on his celebrity” to get stuff and it makes him feel dirty (I think everyone with any kind of following does that though so nbd)

Talk of how TV/film is more diverse in telling minority stories these days.

Was asked by Malik if he has any kind of chip on his shoulder career wise and Misha says the chip on his shoulder is being bored. But says he needs to work on being more engaged.

He then abruptly wants to end the interview. Saying he has to pick up his kids. Malik wants another question. He asks how Misha has been hurt or healed by his career.

Misha then brings up the movie Karla. Again admitting to becoming more like Paul psychologically irl. But says knowing he has that type of evil in him somewhere (and says that we all have that in us) made him more empathetic to the human condition.

They then say their goodbyes. End of interview.

——

My takeaway. The worst thing he can think to say the people who don’t like him in the fandom did was trolling to get his Facebook deactivated? Also that people can see the suspicious nature of his businesses? It would be really easy to settle that with actually being transparent about the finances, which they aren’t and not having close family as benefactors though. Also, I can only speak for myself. But I never hated him. I actually loved Castiel (before his character was there just to be there in recent seasons and Cass wasn’t Cass anymore. I think Misha’s need to pander to shippers/stay on the show was a great disservice to Castiel and his arc) I was a huge Misha fan, and participated in RA and Gish a lot. I absolutely adored Misha, I led myself to believe he was the most amazing person in the world, obviously that’s the reaction he wanted to cultivate from us. Unfortunately I learned too much, experienced first hand and heard too much to be able to keep cheerleading for him. I feel bad for the people still under the spell of feeling like it’s their job to keep being defensive and unreasonably loyal to someone who you can’t and don’t really know and only have a superficial “relationship” with. Seeing the ever more unhealthy and toxic lengths people feel they need to go to to prop up his ego etc. The constant investment emotionally and financially that goes into it and the “sunk cost” if you let reality in makes it hard to let go I guess. Even he knows that what he’s done to gain and maintain relevance has attracted what he called multiple times an unhinged fan base he has to try and balance without losing his influence. I think he maybe had or has good intentions but his fame hungry drive and narcissistic personality traits win out in the end. The Heller’s seem to have, as always, taken what was said and blown it out of proportion, twisted things and created their own narrative. I do see them using key words from the interview a lot suddenly though to bully for him. So, I guess the dog whistle to the sycophants worked out. I hope that a time comes where they can have a more healthy relationship with the media and public figures they choose to gravitate towards. We can all get over zealous with things but there’s lines that shouldn’t be crossed. For some that seems sadly unlikely. I hope that Misha does indeed one day get himself in check as he calls it and I can feel comfortable to support him again. But so long as he’s being enabled and not held accountable again that seems sadly unlikely. Even though I do occasionally find myself being drawn in by the facade again a little and quickly retreating because the issues remain the same. There is a problematic dynamic in the Supernatural fandom for sure. That’s why for a long time I opted out and just watched the show separately from fandom. It’s why when I found out it was ending I had this odd sense of relief I wasn’t expecting to feel and it made me sad. I hope that now the show has aired its finale we can all reflect on things, hopefully be more self aware and objective and most importantly honest about what really has gone down and why. When things started turning sour there have been plenty of times it could have been nipped in the bud yet wasn’t. People who used this silly yet special show in selfish ways, times when walking away would have been better than sticking around trying to make things and people into something never intended to be, giving into tribalism while claiming we’re a family... for that I think we all hold a little piece of responsibility.

You can listen to it yourself on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0m07her5JUf0JGGtDVohtJ?si=c-RdyZzFQmSzffgNzZhkQg

#anti misha #anti misha collins #misha collins #supernatural #fandom #anti destihellers #strap in its a long one again #opinion #trying to be objective #alaina huffman #malik yoba #anti minions #misha #collins

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yelenasdog · 5 years ago

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it was a pleasure to burn (spencer reid x fem bau!reader)

genre: fluff i think even though the name is v angsty LOL it’s a literal screenplay with the amout of dialogue i wrote LMAO so idk

summary: a particularly rough and disturbing case gets to reader, and spencer and reader are brought together by this.

words: just about 6k (my longest fic ahhHH)

warnings: typical criminal minds gore and violence just up a notch, they get on a plane at the end, somebody gets ~shot~, somebody gets ~bonked~, cursing, mentions of reid’s addiction, and i think that’s it. also the reader wears reading glasses but that’s the only predetermined factor of appearance. btw i don’t think i used any pronouns in this but i apologize if i’m wrong.

a/n: LMFAO i was outside awhile ago celebrating litha with a nice lil hike and i saw a butterfly and i had just started watching cm and was like hMMm... killer who’s obsessed with symmetry??!1??!? y Es. enjoy 😼 EDIT: THERE IS SO MANY PLOT HOLES OMG FBREHJBFHEJFRE IM RBFBRE

🂦∙🂦∙🂦

Present Day, Central Park, New York

“Aren’t they just stunning?” The unsub spoke, keeping her eyes trained on the butterfly sitting happily on her finger. The brightly colored creature fluttered off her hand that was dripping scarlet, flying around her curly head of brown hair. Her, formerly white, blood-stained dress flowed around her as she followed it, watching in awe as it soared about. She giggled, plopping down on the grass in the middle of a circle of her victim’s pale, lifeless bodies, all of them with ironically morbid butterflies resting upon the frail skin of the corpses.

“Aren’t they, agents?”

She slanted her green eyes, gripping the grass a little harder. I flicked my tongue over my lips nervously, looking over to the lanky man on my left. He simply shrugged, just about as sure of how to handle the situation just as much as I was.

“If I knew you all were coming, I would have cleaned up, I really would have, I promise.”

We slowly walked towards her, twigs and leaves crunching under our feet. It could have been comparable to a hunter stalking its prey, but it unfortunately was quite the opposite.

6 days earlier, Quantico, Virginia

“3 bodies, all found within the last 48 hours in rural New York. So far, the first body has revealed that although it was dumped upstate, the victim was murdered in the city, and the same most likely goes for the other bodies as well. Nails well manicured, no drugs in the system. They aren't junkies, we’re dealing with upper class citizens.”

My face contorted as I took the photos from Reid’s hands, his large and tanned one surprising me by how soft it felt as it accidentally brushed against mine. I blushed like a madman, looking to see him doing the same thing. I cleared my throat getting Rossi’s attention.

“Why are we only now hearing of this?” I questioned, flipping through the images as I did so, my confusion only growing. I didn’t recieve an answer, leaving my curiosity to bloom.

“Wait, how did you say they were killed again?”

Morgan looked up, taking the photos from me. “He didn’t.”

I sighed, pushing my glasses up on my nose.

“Is there at least any correlation between the bodies and the butterflies?”

Our attention was shifted to JJ, the resident expert on the insects.

“Actually, the ones being found with the bodies are from the Amarynthis family, all native to Latin America. They weren’t there by accident so yes, they’re somehow related.”

Rossi stood up, grabbing his coat.

“Well, none of this is nearly enough for a profile, so pack your bags and tell the others, wheels up in an hour. We’re headed to New York.”

4 days earlier, F.B.I. Field Office, New York, New York

“The final report from the latest victim is in, all the autopsies are clean. They show no signs of struggles, no marks, no blood, no anything. The eyes weren’t bloodshot, so suffocation is ruled out, and that was our best bet.”

I sighed, sliding the case file across the glass table to Spence as I took my seat, sinking into it and allowing myself to be consumed by its warmth.

“So what your saying is that we’re back at square one.”

I looked up at Hotch from where I sat, running my hand through my ponytail.

“Yeah. That’s what I’m saying.”

Just then, the young Doctor spoke up as he flipped through the pages.

“The eyes weren’t just not bloodshot, there was barely any blood left in any of the victims bodies, only about 3% of the volume left. The killer drained them.”

Morgan gave me a shocked expression, silently asking for an explanation.

“Which you failed to mention, Y/n.” Aaron spoke, agitation once again present in his voice.

I looked at the ceiling, crossing my arms in front of me before turning to face Hotch once more.

“Yeah, well, I thought it was obvious when I said no blood.” I stuttered out cautiously.

“On the bodies! Not in the bodies!” Morgan exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air in what was in my opinion, very childish. Everyone else in the room aside from Spencer was either shaking their heads or pinching the bridge of their noses, and reasonably so.

“Look, I’m sorry I just didn’t see it in the report, plus, In the scheme of things, it just doesn’t seem to matter.”

I soon regretted my words, realizing how ill-fit they were for the current conversation I was having. Spencer looked up, tilting his head.

“Doesn’t seem to matter? How? There’s an endless amount of possibilities now that we know this. If we had known it sooner we probably could have figured out the pattern and caught the one doing this!” He harshly spewed, his voice acting like a crescendo of sorts, quiet and calm and moving towards a loud and violent tone. Tears began to prick at the corners of my eyes and I was starting to feel guilty, not to mention absolutely stupid as could be.

“I’m- I really am sorry guys, truly.”

Hotch locked eyes with me, taking a stern tone that one would usually take with a disobedient child, perhaps even Jack.

“I hope that’s a comfort to you when another body shows up. That’s their blood on your hands.”

I was frozen, the gravity of the situation taking its toll.

In the background I heard him say something to Morgan about a new profile having to be made as there were many new things to be known from this revelation. But it all went in one ear and out the other, just unpleasant white noise.

As I clumsily stumbled out of the room, I felt Reid’s eyes burning holes into the back of my brain. I was quick to turn my head to meet his glance, causing him to look down. I felt bad, the weight on my chest growing heavier from the interaction.

I sat down at my desk, turning on my computer and immediately going to google. I typed in “hypnosis” and let the info trickle in.

About 30 minutes later, I still felt absolutely horrible, but I had also put together a valuable profile in the time that had passed. I shut the newly finished file, blowing an abandoned strand of hair out from my eyes. I had to do a double take when I saw Spencer staring once more, his deep hazel eyes meeting my own. I gave him a small smile before standing up and walking to Hotch’s makeshift New York office. I pushed open the heavy door, placing the folder on his too-clean desk.

“What’s this?” He asked, taking it in his hands.

“My theory about the unsub. I think I know what she’s been doing. You can tell the team if you want, I’m not sure if they would wanna hear it from me. ”

He gave a small smile, pushing the file back over to me.

“You get the team together and I’ll get the local PD caught up. You tell them yourself.”

A few minutes later, everyone except for Reid had gathered in the meeting room. I peeked through the half closed blinds that allowed a line of vision to his desk in an attempt to locate him. He was positioned there, staring blankly at his laptop that appeared to have nothing on the screen. I knocked on the window lightly to catch his attention, his glazed over eyes looking in my direction. I tilted my head at him, silently beckoning him to join me. He only shook his in response, shaggy brown locks swaying back and forth. I sighed, frowning at his action. I turned to the group, clasping my hands in front of me.

“Everyone, this will just be a second if you’ll excuse me.”

With a raised eyebrow from Hotchner and a jab in the direction of Spencer’s workspace, I swiftly walked out of the crowded room.

“Spence, care to join us?” I asked, resting one of my hands against my hip, the other on his orderly desk.

“No, I don’t think I will. I need to try to figure this out before she finds her next victim.”

“What makes you think the unsub is a she?” I searched his eyes that had seemingly become brighter at my piqued interest in his hypothesis.

“Well, the unsub seems to be obsessed with symmetry, all the bodies being found in obscure yet symmetrical positions. This could suggest she had some sort of deep rooted insecurity, possibly from some sort of bullying from growing up in a small town where she was looked at as a superior for subpar looks. She moved to the big city, expecting a big break. Instead she was shunned for being less than average. She grew frustrated and as a result, she began her killing spree. The stresser could have been one too many insults that made her snap. Plus, that would account for the butterflies left on the scenes that are used in modern examples of both femininity and symmetry.”

I smiled widely at his words.

“What- why are you smiling, what are you smiling at?”

I tapped his desk, rolling my bottom lip between my teeth. I headed back towards the conference room, looking over my shoulder.

“Because, I’m glad we’re on the same page, Dr.”

——————

“So, our girl, as Dr. Reid has explained to us, is obsessed with her appearance. She’s an organized killer, no mistakes and no signs of blood or anything of the sort on scene. She has practice, she does this sort of thing every day. She is most likely in the age group of 23-30, and has a job in the cosmetic industry, our guess is in plastic surgery. She probably volunteers weekends at local butterfly sanctuaries or zoos, finding comfort in their perfection that those in her life, or formerly in her life, cannot and could not provide.”

“Which would explain to her easy access to non-native species of the insects. She has an absolute infatuation with symmetry, which yet again, links the butterflies on the crime scene to her MO.”

Spencer and I were vividly explaining our shared theory to the team, as well as local law enforcement. He was excited by his discovery and the lead on the killer, and his energy was contagious.

“She kills without remorse and out of jealousy, picking victims who all have one thing in common.”

Spence pointed to all of the images pasted on the board in the center of the room, all of them split in half and reflected, creating a perfect mirrored portrait.

“They all have perfectly symmetrical faces, as well as strong jawlines and high cheekbones. As most of these victims are models or those searching to start a modeling career, we believe she is luring them in with a photographer trope, promising to make their dreams come true.”

I nodded, taking a moment to study Reid’s own sharp yet somehow soft features. I allowed my eyes to wander over his sunken in, kind, and curious eyes; his pillowy pink lips that are in dire need of some chapstick.

“Agent?”

I turned my head, snapped back to reality by Rossi calling my name.

I gave a tight and quick smile, returning to the topic at hand and tactics to catch the unsub. But of course not before Emily gave me a crooked smile, resulting in me rolling my eyes.

“Physically, she’s nothing special, most likely a mundane appearance or one with quite obvious surgical changes. No in between. Check all of the plastic surgeon offices in the area for both employees who fit our description, as well as a patient who has gotten any serious facial mod operations. Do the same for any weekend volunteers at local zoos and animal sanctuaries, specifically working with any insects.”

It was an NYPD officer then that spoke up this time, raising her hand briefly.

“But, you still haven’t mentioned how she’s killing them?”

“Hypnosis.” Reid and I both spoke at the same time. He looked to his black Converse, sliding his hands into his pockets. I observed the room and all of the skeptical faces filling it.

“Even if it may sound far fetched, we saw no signs of anything that indicated a struggle or even any marks or wounds. This led us to believe that some form of hypnosis was used to allow her an easy kill. This means extra caution will have to be taken when actually handling the unsub. Even though we’re positive she’s using hypnosis, which method she is using to actually kill them after the fact is what we’re unsure of.”

I turned to Spencer, handing off the explanation to him.

“We think that because of her whole thing with symmetry, she wouldn’t want to disturb the natural state of the victims and their faces, even if she would do the same to her own.”

“Which means?” JJ asked, her blue eyes slanted and glossed lips left ajar.

“It means that the unsub wouldn’t want to leave any large marks like stab or gunshot wounds.” I nodded at Prentiss, who had made the assumption, confirming she was correct.

“With her presumed background in plastic surgery, we believe she was able to make small incisions that made no visible scars. We’re having the coroner look back over the bodies as we speak.”

“She drains the body’s blood 97% of the way before closing the holes up. What she does with the blood, we don’t know. Another Eddie Mays, perhaps.”

I looked over to Spencer, raising my brows at his comparison. He was quick to defend himself, shaking his hands left to right and mouthing “No” while simultaneously shaking his head the same way, something he seemed to be doing often as of late.

After we had finished consulting with any officers who had remaining questions, we branched off to conduct our own routine investigations. We found that the only thing they all had in common apart from the symmetrical faces, is that they all had visited the Central Park Zoo in the 24 hours before they were killed. We received a phone call from Garcia not long after we put together those pieces, being alerted that there was one girl who had, in her words, “Hit every mark there was to hit, sunshine.”

“Her name is Alessia Copelas, she works weekdays as a surgeon's assistant at Premier Cosmetic, and weekends at Central Park Zoo from 4-8 p.m.”

I smiled at the new info from the blonde bombshell known as Penelope, turning to Reid who was still looking at me quizzically.

“Alright, thanks babes, you’re the best.” I spoke into the phone, a comical “Mwah!” made from either side as we hung up.

He shook his head, keeping the odd look on his face.

“I swear, you guys have a weirder relationship than her and Morgan.”

I laughed, sliding my phone into my back pocket.

“Oh, please, Spence.” I gingerly placed a hand on his cheek, patting it twice.

“You’re just jealous.” I made a pouty face, letting my hand linger before walking off. “Come on, we’re going on a field trip.”

“Where to?” He asked, gripping the door frame, using it as leverage to swing himself closer to me. He took long and quick strides, catching up to me in no time.

“You like animals, right?”

———————

4 Days Earlier, Central Park Zoo, New York

As soon as we entered the zoo, our ears were filled with the sounds of the loud screeches of birds and monkeys alike. Reid covered his ears, cringing and making his displeasure known with an “Ahh!”

I smiled at his geeky behavior, admiring the animals in the enclosures. I paid special attention to a particularly impressive species of tarantula, leaning down to admire them. A few moments later I looked to my left and saw Spencer doing the same thing.

“Did you know that arachnids have asthma which is why they don’t run for extended periods of time, similarly to cheetahs?”

“Yes I did.”

His face scrunched up in an adorable manner, causing an involuntary giggle to fall past my lips.

“Well did you know that-“

“Ma’am?”

I turned to see a young woman with flaming red hair and a freckled face smiling at me, her green collared uniform top complimenting her eyes of a different shade wonderfully.

“Oh, hi, I’m Agent Y/l/n and this is Dr. Reid, we’re with the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI.”

Her expression shifted to a more confused one, her smile not leaving her face.

“What can I do for you two?”

“Is there an Alessia Copelas that works here, maybe volunteers on the weekends?” Spencer asked, his puppy dog eyes immediately warranting a response.

“Yeah, she volunteers here, she seems nice. Is she helping with an investigation?”

“Well we think that she may have some part in a series of murders.”

Her smile disappeared this time, turning into a cement frown as panic flooded her body.

“Oh God, was she- Is she a killer? Have I been working with a killer for all this time? I mean, I never had any shifts with her but from what I heard I thought she was so sweet-“

“Look,”

Reid glanced down to her name tag that read “Lillian” before meeting her eyes. His tongue darted out, licking his lips, a nervous habit of his I’d picked up on.

“Lillian, we aren’t sure if she’s the killer we just needed to get a feel on her and get some information regarding her personal life.”

She started frantically nodding her head, more trying to convince herself she was okay rather than ourselves. I looked over her shoulder at some exhibits, thinking to myself how this would end up being a waste of our time if this poor girl couldn’t get a grip on herself.

I was soon proven wrong when I looked over to see a young girl wearing an identical uniform to Lillian, probably somewhere between 23 and 24. She had untamed chocolate locks with bangs that stopped just above the shoulder, blemishes covering her T-Zone, and a rounded face to go with it.

The cherry on top? Under her arm she carried a small enclosure with what appeared to be amarynthis meneria, the same butterflies found on the victims.

I tapped Reid on the shoulder once as discreetly as possible, catching his attention. I heard him mutter a small “Oh God” before he told Lillian to walk away calmly and quickly. She ignored his request, turning to look at Alessia, letting out a blood curdling scream and sprinting the other direction.

“Shit.” I cursed, beginning to walk towards Alessia, Spencer by my side. I smiled at her, trying to appear friendly. Reid spoke up as we got closer.

“Hello, do you by any chance-“

wham!

“Spence!” I exclaimed, reaching down to help him up from where he had fallen from being whacked by the 4’2 pyscho that was Alessia Copelas.

“Did she get away?”

I turned to see her gone, the only sign she was even here being the forming bruise on the Dr’s face.

“Yeah. She did. I’m sorry, Reid, that was really stupid of me.” He shook his head, running his own hand over the raw skin.

“It’s fine, I would have done the same for you.” He looked up, and I wasn’t sure if it was my school-girl esque crush on him or the fact I just had another experience with a serial killer, but my heart was racing nonetheless.

————————

F.B.I. Field Office, New York, New York, 1 Day Earlier

The stress levels in the room were high.

Despite our best efforts, several more bodies had been found, New York’s narcissists were in a state of panic, and the spirits of the BAU were down to say the least.

“What? Are you kidding me?” I exclaimed, looking at Hotch in disbelief.

He rolled his chocolate eyes, fanning the folder containing the new information we had gathered on Alessia.

“I wish I was, Y/n. She’s off the grid completely, her apartment is empty, phone and credit cards have been deactivated, and the surgeon’s office hasn’t heard from her for 5 days. And the media has decided to give her the name ‘Butterfly Baron’, so she’s probably been fueled even further. We need a new lead before she strikes again.”

I scoffed, standing up and pushing my chair away.

“This is unbelievable. How many times do we have to reinforce the idea to local PD! Especially when the unsub is a self absorbed psycho, do not give them a name! God, I really cannot fathom this.”

I reached up, letting my hair down from where I had messily thrown it up upon my arrival to work that morning.

I stormed out of the room, my heels clicking behind me. I ignored Hotch’s calling of my name, making my way to the closest restroom.

I went in, locking the door behind him. I ran my hands through my roots, tugging just enough to where it hurt.

Turning the water to the left all the way, I splashed it from the stream leaving the faucet on to my face. I scratched my fingernails against the skin, wiping away the tears that had escaped.

“This is all your fault, y/n.” I whispered at myself in the mirror, doing my absolute best to engrain the message in my brain. I had my head hung in shame when a knock rang out.

“Y/n?”

It was Spencer. My mind started going a million miles a minute, thinking about why he could be there. With my voice raised a few octaves, I tried to scrape up a response.

“I’ll be out in a few, Spence.”

It was quiet for a split second, leaving me to foolishly dance around the idea that he had left me to wallow in my sorrowful thoughts.

“Y/n, Hotch wanted me to check on you. Are you ok?”

My heart slightly sank at the idea that he might’ve just come to check on me because he himself was worried. I discarded the thought, bringing myself back.

“Y/n can you please answer me? If you don’t open the door I’m gonna send in JJ or Emily.”

I sighed, wiping under my eyes where my mascara had smudged, begrudgingly walking over to the door. Just as my hand landed on the silver handle, his voice that was constantly playing in my head echoed out once more.

“Y/n, please? I need to know you’re okay. I’ll come in there myself.”

A soft smirk graced my face as I turned the handle to reveal a worried looking Spencer.

“Y/n, oh God, you had me worried.”

He was quiet when he spoke and his hair looked messy, like he had been running his slender fingers through it in a stress filled state.

I sniffled, attempting to still keep back tears that were still threatening to spill.

“I’m alright, Spencer. Really, I’m fine.”

He gave me a small smile, his eyes meeting my own.

“I know, it’s just that when I had my Diludad problem,” he hesitated.

“I would lock myself in bathrooms to shoot up, and I know you aren’t having a problem like that but I just was worried about you- what are you doing?”

I cut off his rambling by throwing my arms around his middle. He tensed, but quickly melted. He wrapped his strong arms around my shoulders and my waist, laying his head on mine.

“Y/n, I promise you, you’re doing your absolute best to stop Alessia. We wouldn’t even be where we are right now if you hadn’t made the connections. Those deaths are not your fault.”

My tears finally began to cascade like a waterfall, staining his shirt.

“I know, but it’s just like it is all my fault! I could have paid closer attention, or-or, I could have went after her at the zoo, it’s all my fucking fault, Reid.”

I sobbed into his shirt, my hand gripping his shirt like my life depended on it. Like if I let go I would fall into a deep, deep, endless hole.

His hand on my waist moved up to cradle my head.

“It’s not, I promise you-“

He was cut off mid sentence by the ringing of his phone.

“I am so, so sorry-”

I pulled away, breifly touching under my nose with my wrist, then moving a hair behind my ear.

“Nope, it’s fine, don’t worry.” Our words almost had overlapped each other as we clambered to fight the tension that had risen. I closed my eyes, tilting my head up, thinking about how unprofessional yet intimate our previous position had been. How wrong, yet how right it felt.

I kept running the moment through my head, the feeling of his warm figure encasing mine on replay.

His phone call played as background noise to the film playing in my brain, his voice calming me to an extent.

“Yeah, we’re on our way. Thanks, Morgan.”

He closed the phone with a snap, also snapping me out of my trance, putting the movie on pause.

“They’ve got a hit. Copelas was seen dropping by her old apartment.”

And for the first time since that Goddamn case had started, I smiled genuinely.

“Let’s go get her.”

————————

15 Minutes Prior, Central Park, New York

“Hotch?”

“Yes?” He looked back from where he was driving, following our lead in a rushed manner.

“What will we do if she...” I trailed off.

“Hypnotizes one of us?” He finished for me. I nodded solemnly.

The look on his face was conflicted and it took him a moment to come up with a response.

“We kill her before we have to kill one of our team members.”

He saw a look of uncertainty on my face and spoke up once more.

“And that’s an order.”

I nodded again, making eye contact with him through the rear view mirror. I fell back into my seat, closing my eyes briefly.

After a few more minutes on the road, we had arrived.

The doors all slammed to the SUVs, one after the other as we stepped out.

“The letter said that she would be here, somewhere here.”

The voice of Morgan was channeling through my earpiece, referring to the letter found at her apartment that she had left just for us.

“We ordered evac on citizens, correct?”

The unsure voice of JJ was also heard through the earpiece, her uncertainty quite unusual to hear.

“Yes, it was the first thing we did, Jayj.”

I whispered, a sly smirk from Spencer forming at my behavior.

“Oh shut up.”

“I didn’t even say anything!”

snap!

Our senses adapted, becoming dialed to 11 at the sound of a twig snapping under someone's feet.

“Was that you?” I mouthed to Spencer. He shook his head no and I silently cursed to whatever force was listening.

I nodded, which he then reciprocated, the pair of us slowly walking towards the source of the sound after he did.

“They’re going to remember me, I’ll go down in history.”

The voice was sing-songy and quiet, floating through the air. I took a shaky breath, continuing my steady pace.

My breathing momentarily halted soon after.

Different variations of “Oh my God”s, and loud gasps from almost everyone on the team flooded my ear canal at the horrifying sight in front of us.

Red. So much of it.

“Guys, I think we know what she’s been doing with the bodies’ blood.”

“No shit.” I muttered under my breath.

She was bathed in the blood, it looked like something straight out of a horror movie.

“Alright everyone, I want you to approach her as quietly as possible, Morgan, if you get the chance, corner her.”

Hotch’s voice was a stark contrast to her own, Derek’s response all the same.

—————————

Present Day, Central Park, New York

“But Agents, you still haven’t answered my question. They’re beautiful, aren’t they?”

“Alessia Copeleas, FBI, come on, get up, lets go.”

Derek’s voice was stern, not asking, but demanding that Alessia come with us.

“I’m afraid I just can’t do that, Agents.”

She stood up abruptly, causing all of our weapons to rise. The sun reflected off of the silver metal of Reid’s gun, sparkling in a stunning way that caught me off guard.

We all were trying to act as if we were in total control of the situation, but we could tell that us nor Copelas really believed that. Her words were her weapon, and this was the one time where words could hurt, but sticks and stones had virtually no power.

“Take another step and we will have no hesitation to fire.”

She smirked, rolling her eyes.

“If you do, will I be famous you think? You think they’ll hear about me back home?”

Her curls softly blew in the wind, making her appear almost harmless, maybe even endearing, if it wasn’t for the hardening coat of human blood soaking her clothes and seeping from her skin.

“Is that what you want? The kids back home and everyone here to hear about you? You want ‘Butterfly Baron’ written on every billboard in Times Square, your picture painted in museums, films to be made in your honor?” Reid was the one who spoke up this time, his voice remaining strong. Her eyes shone with a sickening excitement at what he said.

“You want to be famous?”

She nodded vigorously.

“Too bad.”

My eyes widened, surprised at the detour the conversation had taken.

“What-what do you mean?”

“Please, the only thing people will hear about is a sad, boring little girl from a small town who killed to feel better about herself. They’ll forget about you in a week, who knows, maybe they’ll even grow an infatuation with your town, someone you went to school with may get as lucky as to catch their big break!” He laughed, while Alessia looked absolutely devastated.

“You? You’ll be a nobody.”

“That’s not true! I’ll go down in history, and they won’t! I’m the fucking butterfly baron for hells sake! All these people?” She gestured towards her field of bodies.

“You won’t remember their names, maybe not even their pretty faces, but me? I’ll live forever.”

Her nostrils flared and she strode over to Reid with purpose. The safety on my glock clicked off, but Spencer motioned for me to wait. So I did.

“You know, Agent-“

“It’s Doctor.”

This visibly agitated her even more as she started her sentence over again.

“Doctor, you have a beautiful bone structure. Absolutely perfect. Symmetrical, not to mention just flat out stunning.”

A glaze formed over Spencer’s honey eyes at her words. He lowered his gun momentarily before turning towards me, Copelas doing the same.

“And you, Agent. Wow. I feel like I’m in an art exhibit, you’re gorgeous. I think the Doctor man here would agree.”

As he lifted his revolver at me, the situation became all too real as I understood what was happening.

I either had to shoot the man that I was struggling to admit I was beginning to love, or died at the hands of the very same man.

Tears flooded my eyes, all safeties were turned down, and all guns were pointed at Reid.

“Spence, please.”

My voice was weak, something that seemed to bring Alessia lots of joy.

She laughed before talking again, commanding Spencer.

“Pathetic, really! Spence”, she mocked,“shoot her.”

“No!”

bang!

whack!

---------------------

Present Day, Somewhere In The Sky, The Jet

I opened my eyes from where I had been tackled to the ground by Hotch, surveying my surroundings to see Alessia laying on the grass, the source of her gunshot wound non-distinguishable from the previous blood on her body.

I looked to the right to see where Spencer had crumpled to, his frame bent in a discombobulated position.

“Spencer!” I cried out, crawling over to him like some sort of dog,

“What happened to him?”

“Y/n, he was going to shoot you-“

“I don’t care you should have let him!”

I cradled his head in my lap, allowing my pent up tears to fall.

“Y/n?”

My eyes snapped open for real this time, my mind calmed at the sight of Spencer sitting next to me on the couch, gently shaking my shoulder in an attempt to wake me from my nightmare.

“Spencer! Sorry, was I too loud?”

He chuckled, gesturing to the rest of the sleeping plane around us.

“You’re fine, I wasn’t sleeping, I decided to reread ‘Fahrenheit 451’ for nostalgia purposes. And you weren’t that loud, you just looked like you were having a bad dream.”

I chuckled at the not-so outlandish idea in an attempt to diminish it from his mind and move on.

“I’m fine. But fun fact, I did have nightmares after reading ‘The Veldt’. Seriously, I don’t get how you can just reread Bradbury’s stuff all the time.”

The genius scoffed, starting a rant on how Ray Bradbury’s storytelling was just classic literature and deserved to be reread, thus successfully changing the topic as I hoped my statement would. Although soon after, he caught on much quicker than I would have liked him to.

“And not to mention, The Veldt alone could be seen as a forewarning to the 21st century and beyond, even Bradbury himself supported that interpretation-‘

I gave him a tired smile, enjoying his rambling like I always did.

“-and you totally just got me to change the subject.”

“I was wondering when you were gonna catch up.”

“Hey!”

He laughed as I rested my head on my hand, trying to fall back asleep.

“Really, I can tell those nightmares are bad. What’s going on?” He questioned, his tone empathetic and compassionate.

“It’s nothing, Reid. I just keep seeing in the park, when Alessia got shot and you-you got hurt but instead of getting up like you did in real life, you just…”

I trailed off, not wanting to relive the negative dream any longer for fear of the tears that were pricking my eyes escaping.

“It’s okay, that didn’t happen, I’m right here.”

He pulled me into a hug, allowing me to bury my head in the crook of his neck, his warmth consuming me once more, a sequel to the film from earlier.

“I know, but what if it hadn’t?” I asked as I pulled away.

He shook his head, reaching for his wallet.

“In this job, this course of work, we can’t focus on ‘what if’s’. In this job, we also get nightmares, all of us. It happens.”

He slid a picture over to me, it was of a happy family. The edges were worn from years of being carried, but the picture seemed loved.

“Gideon gave me that when my nightmares started. He told me about how those families we save everyday, and how that’s what makes what we do worth it. And I know you didn’t know Gideon personally, or the work on the specific case with that family, but I want you to have it anyway-“

I cut him off by throwing my arms around his neck, attempting to speak despite being muffled by his fluffy sweater.

“Thank you, Spence. Truly.”

I smiled, and I imagined he was doing the same.

“No problem y/n. Anytime.”

I moved my legs over to be tucked underneath my arms, leaning into Reid. He wrapped his arm around me, also leaning in. We both managed to fall asleep for the remainder of the ride in our state of content, but not before he managed to sleepily call out my name.

“Y/n?”

“Yeah?”

“When we land do you wanna go on a date or somethin’?”

I smiled at him, separating from his form just long enough to see that beautiful face of his.

“Without a doubt.”

🂦∙🂦∙🂦

AHAHAHHAHAHAHA I’M WAY TOO HAPPY WITH THAT LMAOOO but anyway chile-

i don’t have some long ass paragraph to write this time omg wig, i’m just proud asf of my work for once (except for the zoo part ngl kinda didn’t like it😳)

😛✨vibes✨ love u, xx hj

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prorevenge · 6 years ago

Text

Coworker tried to get me fired over breast implants, so I pulled a reverse uno card.

4 years ago now, when I was 24, my mum died of breast cancer, and as both my grandmothers had also died of it I saw a specialist for a screening. I found out I had some cells in one of my breasts that could have turned cancerous at any given moment.

I was told I had a few options:

I could have regular screenings every 3 or 4 months until it does develop into cancer (I was told the risk of the cells becoming cancerous was very high due to family history) but it could also potentially never could turn so I'd just be getting these screenings for no reason

I could get a single mastectomy on the breast with the bad cells, but they'd need to keep an eye on the other one, so I'd still need regular checkups for the other breast

I could get a bilateral mastectomy and remove all of my breast tissue, basically eliminating the risk.

I went for the bilateral mastectomy. It was admittedly the most drastic option but after seeing what cancer did to my mum and grandmothers I didn't want to risk it.

I was warned about scarring but told it should be fairly minor. It wasn't and I was left with 2 huge, pink, jagged scars on either side of my chest, each about an inch long and half an inch wide, and it caused me to go into a severe depression, where it got to the stage of me not even leaving my flat because I didn't want people to see me, throwing out my mirrors, and getting physically sick looking at myself.

I went to a therapist, who suggested a plastic surgeon. The therapist said they'd never normally do that but it was clearly something I was struggling with and I might never get over it, and the therapist could see why I struggle with it. Although I'll admit the therapist did send me to ask about scar reduction. The plastic surgeon suggested a cream, a laser or implants. The cream didn't work, and the laser was both expensive and risky, so I went with the implants. My natural boobs were an F cup so I went with a slightly smaller DD. Since then my mental health has improved and I feel a lot better about the way I look. My confidence has gone up, as has my self esteem. I know I shouldn't put so much into my appearance but I wasn't exaggerating about these scars. Huge, bright pink, jagged, raised, just really awful to look at and I hated seeing myself, and they are now nicely hidden away and you can barely feel them.

In the present day, I'm 28 years old and working in an office. I'm doing a lot better than I was. My coworker, Jill, found out I'd had a boob job (but not about the cancer thing), when myself and my friend from years before the mastectomy were planning a holiday and she made a joke about me going on a plane with my implants, and Jill overheard. By the end of the day, the entire office knew I'd had a boob job, but not why, and half a dozen people confirmed Jill had told them.

Over the next few months Jill made many "jokes" and comments about my chest to coworkers when I was in earshot, at one point saying I had "more plastic than Barbie" and calling me "fake in two ways". I didn't hear this one myself but a friend in the office told me that Jill had at one point referred to me as a "sack of silicone".

IDK what her problem was exactly but at one point she mentioned the NHS so I assume Jill thought that I'd got my tits done for free on taxpayer money (I'd gotten the mastectomy on NHS but gone private for therapy and implants).

I asked her to stop more than once, but unfortunately the places I'd talked to her were places like the lift and the women's bathroom, where there weren't any cameras, and Jill just kept making comments no matter how often I asked her not to. I wouldn't say it was every single day, but I heard at least 3 comments per week for 3 months.

I hit my breaking point when me, Jill and a few other coworkers were having lunch, I referred to something as being shallow and Jill said "you'd know all about being shallow" while gesturing to my chest. I snapped.

I said "do you know why I have these? A few years ago the doctors found potentially cancerous cells in my breast tissue, I was advised to get a mastectomy and was left with huge ugly scars on my chest. I went to see a therapist who sent me to a cosmetic surgeon, who advised me to get implants to hide the scars, and I did just so I could look at myself in the mirror without crying. So maybe next time you want to judge someone for having cosmetic surgery, you should ask them why they had it first". And feeling like that was a mic drop moment I picked up my food and left.

For the rest of the day I had about 1/3 of my office come up to me and offer support, and the rest tell me that Jill was just joking around and I was being a bitch. I replied that Jill was being a bitch long before I was.

I then got an email from HR saying they wanted to talk to me the following day, and when I called for clarification they mentioned a "hostile work environment" (note: this is apparently an American term and holds little weight in England but it's what was said over the phone). I knew the person who signed off the email and I'd spoken to. Her name was Debbie, and she was Jill's friend in HR so I was fairly confident on who had reported me.

I realised that if this was already being sent to HR, I needed as much ammunition as possible, so I went about collecting my information.

As Debbie had dealt with me so far, it was safe to assume she would be the person reviewing the complaint with me, and if that was true I was fucked. However, I vaguely remembered a section on complaints that was in my contract when I first signed with the company. I flicked through the contract and there was a part in complaints section that said I was contractually allowed to request a change of reviewer if I felt my allocated reviewer was biased. It was called an "impartial overseer". I photocopied the page and highlighted that part.

Then I messaged the people who had offered their support over facebook, and said basically "HR have asked to see me. Do any of you remember Jill insulting me to your face and are you willing to write and sign something saying what you heard and when?". Not everyone was willing to help as Jill is somewhat feared in the office due to her befriending HR and management but about 20 people were willing to help me.

I guessed roughly when I'd asked Jill to stop previously (the 4 asks over the last few months, some timings were easy to guess as they'd happened on my break or when I'd first arrived at work) and I wrote them all down, along with a rough time of when the lunchroom confrontation happened and a list of names of who was there for the lunchroom confrontation.

I got to work slightly early the next morning. I went round everyone who had messaged me and most of them managed to give me a printed and signed letter (some didn't manage to write one but nbd). This isn't exact words as there's 16 letters to sum up here but the gist was:

"My name is [their name]. I work with Jill Lastname and OP. On [date] at [time] (approx), I spoke with Jill Lastname, during which she referred to OP as [quoted insult]. I felt this was inappropriate as it directly related to OP's appearance and am willing to go on record further to establish that Jill Lastname has been discussing OP in the workplace in the same manner for 3 months now, causing me discomfort and creating what I feel is a hostile work environment. Signed [their name]"

I wound up with about 16 letters, all from different people, and one of them was in the lunchroom for my conversation with Jill. Some even had bulletpointed lists of everything Jill had said to them about me or other people, as it turns out Jill has issues with a lot of people's appearances. She apparently made comments about one coworker's weight, and something antisemitic about a different coworker's nose, all of which were put in these letters. There are about 45 people in the office so while 16 wasn't a majority, it's still a decent amount. The letters weren't hugely long, most were only a paragraph, but they had all the necessary information.

I was asked to come to HR at 10am. I took the letters from coworkers, the photocopy of the page in my contract, and my dates and times in a little folder with me.

I got there and Debbie was the one overseeing the interview. She got up from her desk, ready to lead me into another room.

I immediately turned to the other HR worker that was currently there and said "so is my meeting with you, then?"

Debbie said "no, you're with me."

I replied that this wouldn't sit well with me, as "my contract states I have a right to an impartial overseer" and as I said this I took the contract page out of my folder. Debbie read it (I wouldn't let her take the paper when there was a shredder so close by) and said she could be impartial. I replied that I really didn't mean to be a pain, but I had it on good authority that the person on the other end of this complaint is her friend, and my contract does say I'm allowed an impartial overseer.

Debbie stomped off to get Supervisor. Supervisor asks how I know she can't be impartial and I tell him that I have it on good authority that the Jill, who was on the other end of this complaint, is a close friend of Debbie. He asked Debbie if this was true, to which she only replied "I can be impartial".

Supervisor took a deep breath, asked the other HR rep to come with him, and the four of us all went to review the complaint. I thanked them for being so accommodating (I was worried I'd annoyed them), Debbie took out the complaint and all 3 of them went through it with me. Debbie looked homicidal the whole time the interview was happening, as she had clearly anticipated firing me (or at least recommending me being fired).

The interview went something like this. It took like over half an hour and they kept asking me the same questions but phrased different ways so this is a really drastically condensed version.

Q: You said outside that you think Jill Lastname reported you. Why is this?

A: Jill has had an issue with me for about 3 months now

Q: Why didn't you come to us when you realised Jill had an issue?

A: I had no issue with her

Q: What issue does Jill have with you?

A: Four years ago a specialist identified potentially cancerous cells in my breast tissue. I had surgery to remove my breast tissue, thereby removing the cells and the risk. After the surgery I was left with large scars on my chest. I went to a therapist for low self esteem and depression. The therapist suggested a plastic surgeon who suggested breast implants to cover my scars. All of this is in my medical history which you have a copy of in my file and my full permission to review. Jill found out about my breast implants but didn't know about the cancer. Jill had a problem with my breast implants, and decided to communicate this problem to our coworkers.

Q: Why do you feel this is true?

A: Here's 16 signed statements all from different coworkers, all testifying that Jill told the entire office I'd had breast implants on the day she found out and has since made comments about these implants frequently. They have quotes of what Jill said to them about it and rough dates and times.

Q: Rough dates and times?

A: No one knew this would be escalated to such an extent so no one really took notes as and when it happened.

Q: What event or events do you think directly led to this complaint of harassment?

A: For me harassment began when Jill told everyone about my breast implants without my consent, but as to the complaint placed against me, it would probably be what happened at about [time] yesterday in the lunch room. Jill made a comment about me being shallow while gesturing to my breasts and I replied by giving her an abridged version of my relevant medical history and ending with a comment about the importance of getting the full story. There are cameras in the lunch room, so I'm sure you'll be able to find that conversation. I'll admit I could have handled the situation better, but after 3 months I felt I had to put my foot down. Here's a list of names of people who were also present. There were 6 people at the table, including myself and Jill. One of these people is also in those letters, and has written their account of the conversation and signed it.

Q: Had you had a conversation with Jill prior to this regarding her comments about you?

A: Several, spaced out over the last 3 months. Each time I communicated to her that I felt uncomfortable and upset with these comments she was making and would appreciate it if she were to stop.

Q: To your knowledge, was Jill made aware of your former cancer at any point in this time?

A: No. It wasn't mentioned in the conversation with my friend she overheard and I didn't tell her because frankly it's none of her business and I did not feel the need to detail my medical history to a coworker in order to avoid further sexual harassment.

Supervisor stands up and says "well I think we're done here". He shakes my hand and sends me back to my desk saying that I'd hear from them after they reviewed the evidence (letters, CCTV, medical history and anything they had already) and made a decision on the case.

I got back to my desk, pulled up my CV, and prepared to start the job search again.

About an hour goes by, then the person who wrote the letter and was there for the lunchroom conversation gets called for a meeting with HR. They come back 10ish minutes later.

The other people who were also there for the lunchroom conversation get called one by one, except Jill. All of them are gone for about 10 minutes then come back, find a coworker, and say that HR wants to see them.

Then the people who wrote letters but weren't there yesterday are also called one by one and are each gone for about 10 minutes each, some longer, some shorter. By about 3:30 it looks like everyone who wrote a letter or was there in the lunch room has been interviewed.

Then, finally, Jill gets called in. She's gone for about 30 minutes and comes back fuming. She glares at me while I work, but I ignore her.

4:30ish, Jill gets called into HR again. 5 pm rolls around, everyone is either leaving or getting ready to leave, when Jill storms back into the office. She glares at me the whole time she packs up her desk. She then starts telling anyone who will listen that I got her fired before shoving her way onto the lift.

An email comes in from HR. My case is closed.

(source) story by (/u/3240278189)

#prorevenge #by /u/3240278189 #pro revenge #revenge stories #pro revenge stories #pro #revenge #last10

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hopeamarsu · 5 years ago

Text

Hurt

Flip Zimmerman x female reader

Word count 1,538

Warnings: Mention of hospital, stitches, needles and bodily injury (nothing is really described in detail, but they are there). Slightly murderous and feral Flip.

A/N: So, I had to have some minor cosmetic surgery last week because of an irregular mole and currently have some annoying stitches on my body. I guess you could say that this piece is inspired by those four little buggers and the process of waiting for the day when they come out. When I started rolling this idea in my head, I could only picture Flip, so I’m dipping my toe into writing Flip, hopefully it’ll turn out alright.

“Colorado Springs Police Department, Zimmerman.”

“Flip... Please do not freak out, but...”

Flip Zimmerman sat up in rapt attention on his desk chair as he registered your timid voice. A voice that was laced with a hint of hurt and something else he couldn’t quite place. You normally didn’t call him during the day, both of you had busy jobs and he knew that as a school teacher you had even less time than him to take a break during the day. If you were calling him, something had to have gone wrong.

“Baby girl, what happened?”

“...I’m in the hospital.”

A million things went across his mind as he waited for you to speak, to explain more, to ease his mind. Had something happened at work? Were you hurt? Was someone else hurt? One of the kids you taught? Did someone touch you without permission? Who he had to hunt down if they had hurt you?

“It’s really not a big deal, just four stitches and that’s only because the doctor doesn’t want it to scar...”

All of his blood rushed in his ears as he reached behind him to grab his jacket from the backrest. You were hurt, bad enough that a doctor had decided to poke needles at you and you were saying it wasn’t a big thing? No, no way in hell.

“Y/N. What. Hospital.” Flip basically barked out, the receiver giving out a crackle, in danger of snapping in two, as he held it so tightly in his hand. He could feel Ron and Jimmy turning to watch him in surprise at his tone and words, but he couldn’t care less in the moment.

“St. Agnes, near the school. But, Flip, honey, it’s not a big...”

“Do not move. I’m coming to get you.”

The receiver went flying as large cowboy boots stormed across the room, taking the phone with it. Ron, sitting closest to Flip’s station, could hear the faint voice calling for Flip from the phone as he looked at the retreating flannel covered back, eyes wide.

You were sitting on one of the waiting room chairs as Flip walked inside. Well, walking was a kind term for the sound of thunderous stomping that you could hear before you saw him. You watched him make a sweep across the room before he settled on you. A few seconds later the mountain of a man dropped down on his knees before you and worried eyes found yours.

“Baby girl, what...” His voice broke and eyebrows pinched together as he kept sweeping his eyes across your features and hands trailed over your body. You smoothed his cheek and smiled, hoping to alleviate the worry on his handsome face. You buried another hand to his hair, scraching lightly at his scalp in a way that always soothed him.

“It’s nothing bad, Flip. I promise you.” You tried to input as much of calmness into your voice as you could, to make him understand that you were alright. Your Flip was a protective one, you didn’t need him going off the rails with what you were about to reveal. “Just a small accident that happened at the school. There is nothing to worry about, trust me.”

He took a couple of breaths through his nose, hoping silently that he could light a cigarette here. He really needed the nicotine right about now, his chain-smoking on the ride over a proof of that.

“Tell me. Please.” The words were still a little choked as they were whispered. As far as he could feel and see, you were in one piece, no blood or missing limbs. You looked pretty much the same as that morning when he had left you at the gates and kissed you goodbye, promising to pick you up after the school was over. But he knew that it was only an illusion. One that would shatter as soon as you spoke.

“Well... Joshua and Michael were fighting again during art class. They had their hands on some clay carving knifes and as I went to stop them, one of them accidentally stabbed me.”

Stabbed you? With a knife? And you claimed you were alright? How in the name of everything that was holy were those boys still breathing? He could feel his blood boiling again, a nervous tick on his knuckles. His nostrils flared in anger.

“Honey, I need you to calm down. I am fine, I promise. The nurse at the school looked me over, but told that it was better if I came here instead. The doctor decided that I would need some stitches, just to make sure that the area does not get infected and so that it doesn’t scar. At least not badly.”

There was a possibility that you would get a scar from all of this? That was it, Flip was going to kill the boys responsible for hurting you. Ron could help him dispose of the bodies and Jimmy could run interference. There was a nice stone quarry outside of the city they could use for the job, nobody would be the wiser.

“Where?” He ground out, your hands the only thing that kept him from bolting to his truck and going hunting for those responsible.

You gestured at your chest and Flips eyes widened. That bastard kid had stabbed your tits? Oh, they were going six feet under. He must have flashed murderous anger in his eyes one too many times as the next thing he realized was that you had placed both of your hands to his cheeks and forced him to look you into the eyes.

“Flip. It was an accident. You cannot plan to murder anyone. I am fine. I promise. This is only a precaution.”

“I’m not planning to murder anyone.” He didn’t care that he sounded like a petulant kid at that moment. He wanted to hurt them for hurting you, but if you didn’t allow him to kill, he could do other things to them to make sure nothing like this happened ever again. “Can I...”

“No, absolutely not. Flip, they are seven years old, I do not want you giving them nightmares either. They are scared enough as it is.”

Fine. He held out his hands as to surrender to your will. But then he turned his attention back to your body, wanting to rip the cardigan off you so that he could see your skin. Make sure that you had been given all the care you needed and he could sooth his worrying mind that all was going to be okay.

“Show me.”

If the doctor had done a sloppy job, Flip could settle for him as well. The idea of it all sickened him. That someone had poked a needle into your perfect skin, threaded it back together, leaving ugly black strings in there to tighten the skin for days to come. That had to have caused you discomfort, to make you even more uncomfortable and he wanted someone to pay for it. He would gladly burn the world at your feet to easy any pain you had, physical or otherwise.

“I’ll show you once we are home. I promise. But I need you here with me now.” You kissed him then, wanting to feel those velvet lips move against yours, make you forget the afternoon completely. Despite what you’d told Flip, you had been slightly shaken by the experience and the pain that was still ebbing from the needlework. And you knew that he would provide comfort for you, make all this go away.

Flip was a full-body kisser so it was no wonder that once your lips touched his, he wrapped his arms around you. He pulled you to his lap, right there on the hospital waiting room floor. Hands danced across your back, slipping lower to grip your bottom. Flip desperately wanted to slip his hands under you skirt, he needed to feel your skin on his skin.

There was almost a feral need coarsing through his veins. He wanted to run away with you on his arms, tuck you under him on a bed with silk sheets, where nothing could hurt you. To place kisses everywhere on your naked body, taste the salt of your skin with his tongue, bring you to the edge and to heaven, time and time again. Make it all go away, leaving nothing but pleasure behind.

But before he could act on those desires, before the kiss could get too heated (a reccuring thing with Flip and those sinful lips of his) you pulled away. You pressed small kisses to his lips as you grounded both of you back to reality. “There is one thing...” Another kiss “...I still need to tell you.”

Flip quirked an eyebrow at this. What more could there be?

“So, there are some rules we need to abide to while I’m healing. No heavy lifting and nothing can poke the wound. Also, I cannot go swimming in the next ten days and a day after they do come out. And... I can’t sweat heavily or jostle the wound. That means sex is out.”

“Fuck.”

His week just went from bad to worse.

Tagging as requested @aloneandsleepless 😉

#flip zimmerman #flip zimmerman x female reader #cw: bodily injury #cw: stitches #cw: needles #cw: hospital #my writing

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unstoppableforcce · 5 years ago

Text

the fight — part three

pairing: Poe Dameron x CMO! reader

previous part | masterlist

a/n: this is the final part of this little mini series and while I had originally planned more angst, I thought a nice fluffy resolution would be nice for my sweet how wonderful pair

It was a grueling bruise, but the cosmetics of it weren’t what bothered you. It was the pain.

Not like a shooting pain, it was a soreness, radiating from the bend of your elbow to what felt like the entire rest of your body. Rubbing over it only seemed to exacerbate the pain, but you did it anyways as your stare stayed trained on the bed directly in front of you, to the body laid unconscious on the bed to be more precise.

You needed the pain, something to feel while every other element of emotion drained from your system. With the DataPAD in your lap, you could monitor his vitals and not a single tick had been out of place since you took your seat down next to him, but you still couldn’t look away, not for a second.

Even as your staff poured in an out, asking for your signature or advice, you did it all without pulling your attention too far from him, you just couldn’t.

This was all your fault.

There was little to take solace in, even as everyone tried to give you reason to. They would say there were no casualties, you couldn’t help but argue that there weren’t any yet. They would say that Poe was slated to make a full recovery, you couldn’t help but let your mind linger on the fact that he wasn’t awake yet. The medicine was laid right out in front of you, you had read his whole chart, reviewed every single second of his surgery once you woke up, and been by his side the entire time since they rolled him out, but he wasn’t awake yet.

And it was all your fault.

The sound of boots coming into the room certainly made it to your ears, but you didn’t turn away. Your stare stayed pinned to his form, moving up and down as his breaths did but not moving any more than that. Figuring that the boots were one of your staff, you also figured they would just hand you a PAD to review or a chart to sign off on, but the steps made it to the foot of the bed and held there, finally enough to catch your attention.

The boots belonged to a familiar face, the only one on the whole base that could pull your attention from him.

“I thought I told the doctors you weren’t allowed to leave your room.” Leia sighed as she took in your exhausted form slouched down in the chair at Poe’s bedside.

You barely had the energy to give a shrug back, “they work for me, you really think they’d tell me no?”

Leia spared a wry smile at that but not much more as she returned her stare to the curly-haired man in the bed, her hands gravitating to his feet, holding them gently where the blanket covered them.

Another few minutes of silence passed, but after inhaling a deep breath, Leia turned back to you, “they tell me he’s the worst of them all, most of the other injuries are minor...”

“Rep blew out his ear drum, I think Finn had a broken arm...” you sighed, rubbing at your brow as you tried to get your head to work the way it typically did, “but they’ve all been healed, or, so I’m told...”

She nodded, “when will he wake up?”

Your hand reached from your brow to your neck, fingers dancing along the chain until they found the ring hung gently over your shirt, the cool metal about as painful as the bruising on your elbow. Instead of real pain though, it radiated a grueling heartbreak through every vein in your body.

‘I love you,’ he had said, ‘I know,’ was all you managed back. You couldn’t shake the memory from your head, nor the fear that it was going to be the last thing you said to him—

“Are you—“ Leia turned towards you to ask, but the sound of her voice snapped you awake immediately, shaking your head and sitting up straighter with your hand still on the ring.

“He should wake up any time now, if he’s going to wake up, we just uh...” you tugged the chain, the cold metal pulling at the back of your neck, “we just have to wait.”

She nodded, giving Poe’s feet one last pat before moving around to the side of the bed to lean down and press a gentle kiss to his forehead while squeezing his hand. When she turned back to you, she gave another weak smile. “I’ll have someone keep me updated.”

You gave a similarly weak nod back, not coming close to the emotional stability necessary for even the weakest of smiles. But as she laid a hand on your shoulder to dole out a reassuring squeeze, something within you collapsed and the words flew from your lips before you even realized they were, all your focus still pinned on Poe.

“This is all my fault.”

She was moving to pull away but you caught her with your words, her hand lingering on your shoulder and holding even tighter once she saw the lost look in your far off stare. She squeezed again, but you didn’t snap back, you barely even felt it.

“I knew this was a bad idea, I knew no one should have gone and I was so...”

“You didn’t do this, the First Order—“

“With all possible respect, General, I know what I did—“

She squeezed again as your voice caught in your throat. “You saved his life. That’s what you did.” And as you moved to shake your head, she laid her hand gently on the side of your face and forced your stare fully off of Poe for the first time since you entered the room. “You saved his life... and while we should have listened to you, it was a risk we needed to take.”

Your eyes fell shut, a stray tear emerging from one of your eyes as they squeezed together. “I—“

“You saved him, you risked your life to do so, and none of this is your fault.”

“General, I—“

“This isn’t your fault.” Her hand shifted down to your shoulder, giving another gentle squeeze. But there was no amount of gentle squeezes that could possibly shake you from your guilt at the moment.

You turned to look up at her, sucked in a breath, and let it all come tumbling out.

“I was mad at him... we never fight but I... stars I don’t know where to even draw the line with you, between personal and professional but...” you had to reach up and wipe the lone tear away, “I’m sorry, I—“

But she didn’t interrupt you verbally. Her hand dropped from your shoulder to your neck, moving for the same chain that you had been tugging on and reaching down for the attached ring. Her fingers ran over the ring as your eyes followed them, but as she let it fall back to your chest, you turned back to her and found a stray tear coming from her eye as well.

“Poe is like a son to me.” She said, as a simple matter of fact as she moved her hand back to your shoulder. “Right now, there is no line.”

“You didn’t hear what I said to him...” you huffed, stifling a painful sound in your throat. “Whenever he leaves for missions, he always tries to stop and see me, and I always say that I love him and that I’ll be here when he gets back, always, but I was so pissed and busy with a patient and I... I blew him off...”

“You can’t—“

“If I distracted him—“

“You saved his life—“

“I did this to him—“

“No you didn’t.” A grunt came out with the raspy voice the two of you had turned away from.

Both of you snapped to the bed before you, the same bed which had previously occupied every inch of your attention before you spiraled into your own emotions. Poe was busy trying to prop himself up on his elbows the second he regained consciousness, trying to get out of the bed despite the sudden onslaught of beeping from the PAD in your lap and the surrounding monitors.

But you were to his side in a matter of seconds, letting your beeping PAD drop to the floor and quickly pressing both hands to him, one to his chest and one to his face, to keep him down on the bed.

“Oh stars, Poe...”

“This isn’t your fault.” He barely managed a voice more than a hoarse whisper, but he used every ounce of his breath to disagree with you, and you couldn’t help the somber chuckle that fell from your lips in response.

“I’m so sorry...”

“This isn’t your fault.” He continued, reaching up a weak hand to the side of your face and wiping away the lone tear from your cheek. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry?” You chided carefully and he managed out a weak chuckle in unison with Leia over your shoulder. “I should have said that I loved you, I was just annoyed and tired and—“

“You were right, I should have listened to you, we should have listened to you—“

“You two are insufferable,” Leia scoffed from the foot of the bed. “But I’m glad you’re okay.”

Poe turned to you with a gaze full of love in spite of the overwhelming exhaustion and obvious pain coursing through him and you swore you nearly melted into his side, reaching your hand up to brush away his matted curls from his forehead.

You weren’t the only one melting.

“I’m pretty sure I know who to thank for that...” he cooed out as a small smile settled on his lips.

“Yeah?” Leia countered, “wait until you hear what she did.”

His whole disposition shifted as he searched your face for any sign of injury, his gaze eventually lowering to your arm and finding the bruise growing in the crook of your elbow.

“It’s nothing—“ you tried to jump in before he could, but his brow furrowed much too quickly.

“What did you—“

“I saved your life—“

“I think I’ll give you two some time to work this out.” Leia interrupted your return to banter by walking around you to lean and press a kiss to his forehead and then another to your cheek, “I’m glad you two are okay, truly.”

“Thank you, General.” You were quick to respond and she nodded, pressing a gentle pat against the ring on your chest before looking back to Poe.

“It’s Leia. There is no line.” She smiled, “not when it comes to family.”

Poe took your hand, confused as to what was transpiring in front of him but in no way opposed to his two favorite people sharing such a moment with each other. And with a squeeze, your smile only grew bigger and bigger.

“But also, either of you two do something as stupid as this ever again and there will be real consequences.” She continued as she made it to the door.

And the two of you gave a quick “yes, ma’am,” as she left before you both turned back to each other.

“So, what did you do...” Poe asked with a curious smile, retuning a hand to your cheek and laying gentle strokes over the skin there with his thumb.

“Not important.”

“Oh yeah?” He tried to counter but your lips made it to his before he could.

It was a gentle kiss as he was still not fully healed, and as your pulled back, the two of you were both struck with genuine smiles that were impossible to wipe away.

“I love you.” You told him, “and I’m sorry.”

“I love you too,” he pressed another soft kiss to your lips, “and thank you for being here when I got back.”

“Always.”

Like Leia said, there were going to be hours of debriefings and new strategy session and eventually you’d have to leave his side to go back to work, but for now, things were okay. You could worry about the fate of the galaxy in a minute...

#star wars #star wars imagine #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron #poe dameron imagine #angst #cmo reader #how wonderful series #how wonderful

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cudan2 · 5 years ago

Text

Starbucks and Skin Grafts

Spring Break Shadowing Part 2

Carlisle Cullen x Reader

Word Count: 2,206

Summary: You’re starting your second day of shadowing with Dr. Cullen and get to learn more about him.

A/N: I underestimated the amount of research I’d have to do for this series woops. I’m pre-dent and not pre-med, so if anyone here is actually a doctor or a med student or even knows more about medicine than I do, feel free to tell me what details I should change! (I really did try my best though, but it’s turning out to be more Grey’s Anatomy-esque)

Anyways, this is #4 on my headcanon list.

Masterlist

XXX

When the train stops at the 168th Street Station, you make your first task of the day to find Doctor Cullen. The campus is growing to be familiar territory, but it’s still massive and you find yourself getting lost on the main surgical floor despite already getting directions from a receptionist. Your frustration begin growing as you turn another corner and realize you’re still as lost as before.

“Just the person I’ve been looking for!” a familiar voice calls out. You turn to look over your shoulder and find the doctor you’d spent the last fifteen minutes searching for. He’s wearing a white coat and lacking the scrub cap from the previous day. So he’s blonde, you notice, not a single strand out of place. You take several steps towards him to meet him halfway.

“Good morning, Doctor Cullen. I’m sorry for not meeting with you earlier. It might have been a little difficult to track you down,” you give a sheepish smile.

“Don’t worry, it can certainly take weeks to learn how to navigate this hospital. I’ve just finished doing my morning rounds, so there is about twenty minutes before I meet for a pre-op. Why don’t we grab some coffee and get to know each other a bit more?” Before you can even give an answer, your stomach growls loudly and you mentally berate yourself for not eating anything beforehand. “Perhaps a little less coffee and some more food would be beneficial for you instead,” Doctor Cullen chuckles.

By the time you reach the Starbucks on the first floor of the hospital, you’ve learned the basics about him and vice versa. He’s a plastic surgeon, this was his first year as an attending, he moved here about five months ago, actually started working here four months ago, and attended University of Washington in Seattle for both his undergrad and medical school.

Meanwhile, you currently attend school away from home at New York University, you’re in your third year of college, majoring in biology, minoring in psychology, and on track to graduate a semester early.

“Hey, Doc! The usual as always?” you hear as you make it to the front of the Starbucks line with Doctor Cullen.

“Good morning, Emily. Yes, the usual as always.”

“Sounds good! Will that be all?” Both the barista and the doctor look towards at you.

You splutter out your intended order and lean towards Doctor Cullen as Emily is writing your name on a cup. “You really don’t have to pay for the food and stuff. I mean, I brought cash so–”

“Think of it as compensation. I can’t imagine how many people actually enjoy being up this early in the morning, especially seeing how this is your spring break. Besides, I think you’ll find you need the energy to keep up with me today. I must warn you though, it won’t all lap appys and fun like with Doctor Stone.”

“I like a good challenge,” you smirk at him. He gazes back at you with a twinkle in his eyes and a soft smile and you can’t help the fact that your heart starts beating just a little faster.

Another barista call your names out and you’re suddenly reminded that this is the real world.

“Thanks for the breakfast,” you quickly say, breaking eye contact and grabbing the orders from the counter. Stop thinking about how pretty his eyes are, you tell yourself, even if they do look like pure amber. Doctor Cullen follows suite and goes to grab his grande-sized cup.

“Careful, wouldn’t want to burn the surgeon hands,” you notice the amount steam coming out of the lid and hand him a sleeve for the cup. When he accepts the sleeve from your outstretched arm, you see a peculiar expression on his face and hear a soft chuckle from him before he thanks you. It’s almost as though he knew something you didn’t.

The two of you walk back to his office so he can grab his notes on the patient. On the way there, he tells you more about his daily life as a plastic surgeon as you eat. He’s done so many different procedures that you can barely keep track of the list. There’s a lot less liposuctions and facelifts – those were for the cosmetic surgeons – and more reconstructions and repairs in his line of work.

“The patient you’re about to meet was in a car accident two years ago,” Doctor Cullen explains. “He received extensive burns to the face and neck, all of which have scarred over now. Our goal is to reduce the scarring and give him back some mobility.”

Before you can ask any questions, Doctor Cullen is already knocking on the patient’s door and entering. The door opens to reveal the patient sitting up in bed along and a woman standing beside him. The other two doctors in the room wore ceil blue scrubs – residents, you note, following Doctor Cullen into the room.

“There’s the man of the hour!” The woman exclaims.

“Mom!” The patient lets out an exasperated groan.

“What? As if you aren’t excited to see the handsome doctor either, Tyler!” You try your best not to laugh but can see the two residents smother their own smiles behind fake coughs. Doctor Cullen is the one to accept the indirect compliment and bids both the patient and his mother a hello.

“Tyler, I have a student shadowing me for the week, if you wouldn’t mind another pair of eyes in the room?”

“Yeah, I don’t mind. I’ve definitely experienced a whole lot worse,” Tyler responds.

“Perfect. Doctor Wang, would you present the case?”

One of the residents looks up from her charts and begins reciting the details as if it were second nature. “Tyler Sardella, age 24, scheduled for scar revision.”

“And what procedures will we be performing today?”

“We’ll be planting an autograft and doing a Z-plasty to minimize the appearance of scarring. Skin grafting will help give a bigger range of motion in the neck, accelerate the healing process, and prevent any future scarring.” Her words exude confidence and you hope to sound like that one day. Skin graft and Z-plasty... you’re not entirely familiar with the terms but store them in the back of your head. After all, you’re here to learn.

Doctor Cullen gives a nod of approval to Doctor Wang and turns back to Tyler. “Tyler, do you have any last-minute questions before we send you to the OR?”

“Nope! I’m so ready to turn my head 180 degrees again.”

“Sounds good, I’ll see you soon then.”

You give a quick nod to Tyler and his mother as both Doctor Cullen and you take your leave. The two residents reconvene with their attending several minutes later and exchange words before they both head off to prepare for the surgery.

You stand around awkwardly for a moment as Doctor Cullen looks over the charts. He suddenly calls your name out, eyes still scanning over his notes.

Your response is to stand up just slightly straighter as you say, “Yes?”

“What procedures will we be performing on Tyler?”

Well shit, you certainly weren’t expecting him to ask you that.

“Um, you’re planting a skin graft, an autograft to be more specific, and then doing a Z-plasty.” You’re unsure and your voice shows it. Of course you could regurgitate words, but it’s hard to explain any further when you didn’t know the meanings to those words.

Doctor Cullen looks up from his charts with that twinkle in his eyes again and a smirk playing on his lips. “Correct!” he exclaims and laughs when he sees the petrified expression you’re wearing from being caught off guard. “Y/N, I did warn you it wasn’t going to be easy. However, I may have failed to mention it was going to be me making your experience here more difficult.”

“Why though?”

“What can I say? I like to keep my students on their toes. It keeps things interesting.”

You huffed and followed him to the OR. Challenge accepted.

Scrubbed – check, PPE – check, scrub cap – well, that was for Doctor Cullen, but check. He’s still scrubbing when you hear him.

“Are you sure you want to be in there? It’s going to take approximately three hours.”

“You told me that,” you remind him. “And I told you that I like a challenge.”

“Alright, but please let me know if you feel any fatigue. I can ask one of the nurses to bring in a chair or you can step out for some air–”

“I will be fine,” you insist. “I sit all day in class, standing for three hours will be a good change of pace.” The concern etched into his face is almost endearing, but really, you’re going to be fine.

Everything and everyone is prepped and ready to go by the time you two enter the OR. You make sure to stand in an area that gives you a perfect view of the surgery but would not get in the way of anyone else. Doctor Cullen has his loupes on and you start feeling the high that comes with observing any sort of surgical procedure. It’s not every day that a mere undergrad like you can witness this kind of stuff.

Two hours later, you are still engrossed in the surgery. There’s 80s music playing in the background at the request of the two residents from earlier, who are now chatting away. About fifteen minutes in, Doctor Cullen had properly introduced you to his residents, Lily Wang and Jaime Montes.

Doctor Stone was great and all, but there is something about the blonde doctor that really makes him stand out as a surgeon to you. He’s able to cut and suture whilst explaining the entire procedure to you. He makes all of this seem so... effortless. Although Lily and Jaime are working as much as Doctor Cullen, it’s clear who the leader in the room is.

“You said you went to University of Washington for your undergrad and med school. What made you decide to work here instead of staying in Seattle?” you ask Doctor Cullen suddenly. The conversations around you die down. It seems you aren’t the only one curious about the surgeon.

“I suppose it felt like the right decision at the time.” He glances hesitantly at you from the head of the table before looking back to his work. You can tell there’s more to the story. “I previously worked in a hospital in a small town called Forks.”

“Forks? As in the thing you eat with?” Jaime asks and everyone around you laughs.

“Yes, Forks. It had less than 4,000 inhabitants, so you can imagine the lack of cases like these. The other residents would have gone crazy. It was peaceful for some time but I was ready to move on. It’s a silly notion now that I say it out loud, but I wanted to make an impact on the people I treated.”

“You weren’t making a difference in Forks,” you say. It isn’t a question, but a statement.

“Exactly. One of my deciding factors in working for Columbia was its resources and size. Here, I could save more people to the best of my ability with the most advance resources available.”

Once the surgery reaches its conclusion, you go scrub out with Doctor Cullen as everyone else stays to finish up. You unceremoniously flop onto the bench outside the OR, propriety be damned. Your feet are sore and you wish you could be wearing scrubs and sneakers instead of business-casual clothing.

A water bottle enters your peripheral and you look up to the person handing it to you. Doctor Cullen’s scrub cap is gone once again and his blonde hair is slightly astray.

“Thanks,” is all you can say as you grab the bottle and take a nice, long drink from it. “Nice hair by the way.” Doctor Cullen has the audacity to look down rather bashfully and runs a hand through his hair. Great, now he looks even more attractive.

“You survived,” he says.

“I did.”

“I’m impressed.”

You let out a snort.

“You’re impressed? You, Lily, and Jaime were the ones doing everything. I literally stood there for three and a half hours! I should be the one that’s impressed.”

“You showed resilience. I have a feeling most students your age would have given in for a chair at least.”

“Yeah, I did tell you I like a challenge,” you point out, even if you did feel like never standing again.

“You also asked very good questions, Y/N. Don’t sell yourself short. You have a lot of potential in this field whether you think it or not. Now go get some lunch, you deserve a break.” He sticks out a hand and you grab it to get up. Damn, his hands are cold. “I have some paperwork to file, so I’ll catch up with you later.”

“I’ll see you then,” you say and begin walking in the direction of the cafeteria.

“Y/N!” you hear him halfway down the hallway and turn to look over your shoulder. “How are we treating the donor site wound?”

You decide to keep walking.

#carlisle cullen #carlisle cullen x reader #twilight fanfiction #twilight renaissance #carlisle cullen imagine #twilight imagines #twilight reboot #twilight revival #twilight saga #twilight #I also never intended on this part to be so long #it just happened #i know nothing about plastic surgery #please do not attack me on my lack of medical knowledge #i only know teeth #doctor daddy cullen #twilight fanfic

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of-another-broken-heart · 4 years ago

Text

I was randomly possessed to just. Do some squats yesterday? I was waiting on the microwave. I did 10 squats. Just to move. In the kitchen. And then I did a little walking later with my friend. Maaaaybe a half mile, if I’m being generous??

I’m so out of practice. My thighs are having a rough time today. And my right hip, especially.

It makes sense, obviously. Years of being sedentary due to fatigue and financial reasons and social reasons. Of course 10 squats and a half-mile walk all of a sudden have done this to me.

Still feels bad.

I miss exercising. I miss going to the gym.

Shit’s so fucking expensive.

I’m over here, slightly giddy because I’ve got “st*mulus” funds hoarded right now that are as high as I ever actually managed to save when I was working. So I know, technically, I can afford a few things.

But years of poverty trauma mostly won’t let me. The $10 fruit smoothie indulgence yesterday was a combined celebration. First time seeing a friend in years. Early birthday for us both.

I still looked up the pricing. Because I want to be able to do it, again. 2021 really coming through on the “Let’s remember how to WANT! And SUFFER for it!!” front. The Black Card membership price is way higher than I remember. Basic is still $10/month (plus $39 annual membership fee - but “no contracts” somehow??) and the Black Card is more than double that - $23/month (same annual membership fee - same “no contracts” claim). Basic isn’t really worth it. Tied to one single location, not allowed to use a lot of the facility’s perks, can’t bring a friend. So the Black Card would be the only plan I would actually consider. But not when a year clocks in at fucking $315 (plus taxes and fees*). The Basic ends up just about half that - $159 (plus taxes and fees*). But you go alone, locked to a single location, and can’t use more than half the stuff the place offers.

I can’t believe there was a point in my life where I was doing well enough that I could afford that. And I wasn’t even doing that well! I looked through my old records. I think the most I ever took home in a year was a little over $9k. That was my income during the busiest of my years in my last job, making $15/hour. And I thought i was doing well. I thought that was great. My boss tried to make me feel guilt for doing that much work and earning less than $10k a year. He, who owned not one but TWO houses by the end of it all, and was able to comfortably plan and start a family, and own new (less than 5 years old) cars for both him and his wife -- HE wanted me to feel guilty for the price of my work done for him, even though it still clocked in far, far below the poverty line. God, that’s so fucked up. That’s SO fucked up.

In contrast to making literally nothing for years, though. $9k does sound huge. And it’s been years of cost of living inflation and more wage stagnation, and pandemic and inhuman corner cutting so businesses can still keep profits ahead of human life since then. So even though $9k sounds huge it’s still just. What? A few months of survival? Rent and food and medical expenses and car costs and hygiene and household cleaning and maintenance... $9k is nothing.

I wish gym memberships were covered under insurance. All this fucking panic over “Fat is BAD! FAT IS BAD!!” But fat-removing surgery is just cosmetic, honey darling sweety. Diet and exercise! Diet and exercise!! But all on your own dollar and time. You get NO nutrition education, no metabolic screening, no meal planning, no food assistance! You get NO safe space to move or exercise, you get NO coaching, you get NO training, you get NO gym access!

It’s all a fucking sham.

I just want to feel better. I will probably never get to the point I was before - especially not if it turns out I have CFS (in which case exercising can worsen your health, isn’t that fun!) but I’ll probably die before I find a doctor willing to even entertain that diagnosis, much less run the tests and criteria for me when there’s conveniently my weight and lifelong depression to use as scapegoats instead.

#personal

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capo-cedes · 5 years ago

Text

Michael

INVOLVED: Mercedes D’onofrio, Nicholas D’onofrio, Al Mazomonie, Donna Mazomonie, Rebecca Mazomonie, & Michael D’onofrio TIME FRAME: LOCATION: -; New York City, New York NOTES: After the house is invaded and Mercedes goes into labor, everyone regroups at the hospital.

Mercedes rested against the hospital bed comfortably. This was the part of becoming a parent that she hadn’t prepared for, the labor and delivery. She exhaled softly as she breathed through a contraction as it wrecked through her. One hand gripping the beds railing for dear life as she laid there focusing on something other than the pain or the fact that there was no home to take their child to. The entire hospital was empty from top to bottom, police and guards circled the entire building.

After everything Al decided that by no means could they trust anything and anyone. The price didn’t matter; he had to protect Mercedes, Nicholas, and the unborn child safely if his own life depended on it. He paced the halls, down its entire length were men armed and ready for battle. He looked to his wife sitting beside Mercedes door before he placed his hands in his pockets and paced in the opposite direction.

Freddie stood even in his current state right by Mercedes door. He could hear the clicking of Al’s shoes from behind the closed door. His eyes darted at Mercedes as she exhaled into the room. Pain wasn’t an easy thing to watch on her but it was inevitable. There was nothing he could do there, outside of standing by her door with a loaded rifle in case anything happened within his control.

Head of Cosmetic Surgery Gregory Aronld. Or at least that is what his name tag read. Nicholas glanced down at the running gash on his leg that was being steadily closed. He rose from his chair and moved over closer to Mercedes’ bed, causing the surgeon to scamper holding the needle at the ready. “Mr. D” Dr. Arnold argued feebly, setting back to work as soon as Nicholas was still. “Do you need me to call the nurse?” Nicholas asked his wife, rubbing the back of her hand.

Mercedes groaned softly to herself and when Nicholas moved over towards her she looked up at him. “Would you please let him stitch you up?” she asked in an exasperated sigh. “I’m fine” she said in a low growl as she twisted her body “I don’t need a nurse” she told him, exhaling slowly through her plump lips.

“He knows what he is about.” Nicholas said looking down at the Doctor. He ran a restless hand back through his hair. “We both know you’re lying. But I guess this is a part of it. Can’t they give you something?”

Mercedes looked at Nicholas again calming down as the pain subsided. “I am not” she said to him tiredly as she licked her full lips and looked up at the ceiling. “I don’t need anything,” she replied back to him easily. Women before her had done this time and time again without assistance. She would be no different. She was strong, she was Mercedes Francis for god sakes a little baby could not break her.

Nicholas stretched his eyes, shaking his head softly. “All right.” He was restless. There were so many things that needed to be sorted out. He wanted to be at home combing over the bodies himself. They had to have left some clues. God help Paul if he didn’t come in with some good news. “Ouch” Nicholas groaned, slapping Dr. Arnold against the back of the head as he finished his work. “Watch that shit! Are you finished? Damn.” The doctor nodded, holding his head and moved away from the couple.

Bernice hurried up the hall, each room she passed was empty save the beeping of machinery. Turning a corner she almost ran bodily into Al. “Al!” She blurted. “How are the kids? Has the baby arrived yet?’

Mercedes blinked slowly as she looked over at Nicholas and the doctor in the room. When the man was finished he scurried away, leaving just her, Nicholas, and Freddie in the room. She shifted again in the bed straightening her posture a bit. “My water broke and he left…” she breathed looking back up at the ceiling. “I would have taken the shot” she said confused “why didn’t he do it? Why didn’t he kill me?” she breathed.

Al looked at the men down the stretch of hall, he needed to get some serious shit done and fast. Despite his pending grandchild, he needed him, Nicholas, and Freddie out and about. He wondered if he could leave Mercedes in the care of his wife as they did so. No, Mercedes needed their support right now she could have lost her life, they all could have and he didn’t know what he would have done truly. As a body bumped into him he turned around seeing Bernice “Bernice” he replied. “Fine, Nicky barely had a scratch. They stitched him up” he said. “No, the kid isn’t here yet. Two hours in, we know how long these things can take…”

Nicholas wandered back to his chair and sat down. “They were definitely there to kill you.” He signed, “Doesn’t make any sense why the deed isn’t done. They knew about the safe room. You two didn’t even know about that. And Luis won’t be giving us any clues. They killed him already.” These guys were connected that is for sure. “The soldiers in the kitchen were definitely Russian.” He said, looking over to Mercedes. “Baby, please tell me this isn’t the Russian mafia?”

Bernice cupped her face in her hand and exhaled, taking a moment to gather herself and wipe away her worries. “Yes, yes… I know. But going into labor during an invasion is a surprisingly new concept even for us.” She inhaled dropping her hands. “I don’t know what happened. This is all so unusual” she said crossing her arms. “Nicholas is too careful. The boy is damn near a ghost. How they could have been so careless with a pregnant woman in the house.” She fussed, in disbelief.

Mercedes listened to her husband, her heart pounding in her chest all over again, in that moment she had never known fear. Al’s back hand was an easy pill to swallow but her standing there without protection, soiling her clothes was a fear she had never known. She exhaled softly “this is all my fault, I am so sorry” she expressed seriously. “All those people,” she said thinking about her staff. “I know how you feel about this, and I am sorry” she repeated. “Our son doesn’t even have a nursery to go home to now” she said rambling on.

Al folded his arms over his chest as he stood before the woman, taking her in and watching to worry melt away. “Well,” he breathed “when you think you are going to die, your water breaking in probably the least of your worries” he let slip. “This isn’t Nicholas’ fuck up it’s hers” he breathed.

“Al” Donna said, very close in range to hear what both he and his friend Bernice were talking about.

Al turned around and looked back at his wife, “it’s the truth” he said back to her before he turned back to Bernice. “Nicholas could have died” he told both women “she could have died” he breathed “the baby for God sakes” he added. “And I am not completely sure how I am going to clean up all of this mess and protect them,” he vented. “Can’t even find these dudes right now…”

Upsetting Mercedes wasn’t what Nicholas intended. Even if it had been the only thing he’d done consistently for the last few months. “Shhh…” Nicholas said, going over the bed again, he sat on the edge, laying her head on his chest. “Everyone knows the risk. They’re family will be taken care of and now we have more time to figure this all out. I’m alive and most importantly you are. We’ll deal with the rest later.” He rubbed her arm. “It’s been taken care of. Down to the last baby blanket.”

Bernice looked confused… “Surly not.” She said, shaking her head. “Still this doesn’t make any sense.” she rubbed at her temples. “You can though. Al. you’ve seen the family though more than this.” She looked around at the assembled guards. “Do they have any soldiers left?”

Mercedes looked at Nicholas as he moved over to her once more she laid her head against his chest. She rested her hand against her bump, nodding her head at him as he spoke reassuring her. “Really?” she asked him as she looked up, a bit of shock and disbelief in her voice.

Al shifted on his feet, dropping his hands and placing them into his pockets again. “The Russian mafia” he stressed to her. “She claims her dealings with them were unbeknownst to her. She did what she had to protect Nicholas in the long run but now look at this shit” he said, throwing his hands up and gesturing around them. “Everyone has to watch their backs now” he told her. “Down to you,” he said, wagging his finger at Bernice. “Five” he told her, seriously lifting up five fingers. “There was an all out war at that damn house, bodies everywhere. I had to pay the NYPD so much got damn money!” he said, his voice booming.

Donna uncrossed her legs and recrossed them “Bernice” she breathed softly to the woman. “Come over here and grab a seat” she said “leave that old man to his thoughts” she said cutting off Al’s rant off.

Nicholas nodded. “Don’t sound so shocked. Yes. Red we are who we are. Shit happens. We lost more of the primary staff then I should like...but, we have a place to go and a pretty good skeleton crew to start.” He smirked, “Hell, Freddie can just be the new cook.”

Bernice’s head was spinning. “The Russians.” She whispered the word as if it were holy. “She couldn’t have known. Tiny’s always been Tiny but she’d never put us all in danger for nothing. Al you know that.” Her eyes focused on Al as he put her on notice. “I’m always careful. This isn’t our first war.” She twisted her lips, her heart ached for the families of the dead. “I can send over my personal maid to take over for them,” she said more to herself. She moved away from Al taking a seat next to Donna she grabbed the woman’s hand holding it in hers. “At least the kids are safe. Right, Al?”

Mercedes looked back up at Nicholas and she smirked a little at his comment. “I highly doubt anything Freddie would make would be edible” she joked back to him softly. She looked over at Freddie for a moment before she laid her head back against her husband's chest.

Freddie overheard Nicholas and Mercedes, he didn’t crack a smile though the joke was actually very funny. Instead he simply stood there swapping glances with her and looking straight ahead once more.

Al looked at her and tilted his head “yeah she’ll do anything for your knuckle head son, including endanger us” he replied easily. “I think Nicholas is ahead of you in those regards” he breathed, when his wife cut in he sighed and went on to pace more.

Donna looked to the woman, holding her hand back lovingly. “Yes that is most important” she chimed looking at the back of her husband's head. “She isn’t due for another few weeks, but they say that both are fine. It was a little rocky at first” she breathed. “Which I could imagine, whoever these people are nearly scared the girl to death”.

“Of course” Al replied back to Bernice easily. Then being alive those were the least of his worries. It was keeping them alive. “Now to keep them alive…”

Nicholas chuckled, and nodded respectfully to the bodyguard. “He might surprise both of us.” He said quickly. Freddie was devoted to his wife, which in their current situation meant more than the money they had stored away. He rubbed Mercedes' shoulder, trying to wash away what doubt he could. “Red, are you feeling better? I need to step outside and talk to your father for one second.”

Bernice clicked her tongue. “Well birds of a feather.” She said, giving Al a knowing look. No matter what Al said the whole thing still didn’t sit right with her. “Yes.. but?” she said struggling with the puzzle in her mind. She turned, giving Doona her full attention. “Good,” she breathed sighing with relief. “I can’t imagine how she feels.” She said looking toward the door. “I bet she doesn’t want any company right now”. Bernice’s head looked to Al seriously. He was right and the bigger question was why were they left alive in the first place.

Mercedes chuckled a little at his comment, glancing at Freddie once more. She felt comfort in his subtle arm caress in the moment. “I’m fine, you can go,” she said, nodding her head at him. She knew her husband well enough to know that being out there on the streets would comfort him far more than being in this hospital room waiting for their son to make his debut. There was still so much work to be done and he wouldn’t rest until it was completed.

Al halted and turned around slowly, he didn’t want to act as he naturally would giving the woman’s comment however this was not the time or place he was too on edge.

Donna looked at Bernice and said “I was in there examining things not long ago” she chuckled lightly. “Mercedes is a bull after all, I highly doubt she needs us. But would also never turn us away” she breathed.

Al allowed his wife to finish her cute little banter before he moved towards Bernice and excused her. Grabbing the woman by her shoulder she stood her up and said “Bernice have a walk with me dear” easily as he gestured the direction with his hand.

Nicholas gazed into his wife’s deep green eyes as she gave him leave. “I’m not leaving.” he said plainly. “I just want to get an update status on what’s going on at the house and check in with Paul. Ten minutes tops.” He felt compelled to explain his actions to his wife, something he’d never felt before.

Bernice grinned. “You raised an amazing woman. I’ll be right here until we hear our grandbaby cry. Whatever Tiny needs.” She flinched, surprised by Al’s hand on her shoulder. “Of course.” She said as if she had a choice and rose. “Excuse me Donna.” she said respectfully.

Mercedes shifted in the bed again as the on-set of another contraction surged and she nodded her head “okay” she told him softly. “I’m okay” she reminded him, he never explained himself she didn’t know why he was doing so now. She understood the motive behind departing to seek her father even as she grabbed the rail again and inhaled deeply.

“Aw, thank you” Donna said before Al walked over, she looked at him before pulling her eyes away and turning her head. She didn’t bother to reply back to Bernice thanks to her husband’s intrusion.

Al offered a fake smile to the woman and began to walk, tugging her along with him. “Birds of a feather huh?” he asked her in a hushed tone.

Nicholas shifted as Mercedes began to cling to the arm rest. “Another one huh?” He asked stupidly, feeling helpless for the second time tonight. He stayed in place rubbing her back gently waiting for the contraction to pass.

Bernice walked quickly to keep up with Al. She huffed silently as schooling her face to calm as she realized what was bothering him. “Yes Al. It’s clear Nicholas and Tiny will do anything to protect one another. That’s all I meant.” she replied honestly.

Mercedes nodded her head at Nicholas as she tried to breathe through the contraction, arching her back a little. She closed her eyes for a moment before she opened them looking up at the ceiling above her. She released he railed and grabbed his hand instead squeezing it for dear life “mm” she grunted softly before she exhaled.

Al looked to the woman before he dropped his hand placing them in his pockets. “Is that so….” he said, looking at the side of her face again. “Don’t play with me woman, I am on edge right now” he told her. “I planned to pass the torch over to her as soon as this kid drops, but now I have all of this mess to clean up” he barked in a quiet tone. “The last thing I need is a smart ass lip from you or Donna!” he said screeched, voice rising with each word he was so angry.

Bernice’s head dropped. “I’m sorry if I misspoke. I didn’t think” She confessed. “It’s been a long day for all of us.” Her stomach fell. This wasn’t the time for Al to retire. The family would fall apart without him. “I know.. I am sorry. This isn’t what you wanted but this may be what Tiny needs to really prepare to take over.

Al looked at the woman “it’s alright” he said calming down. At her moment he sighed “I don’t know” he said to her seriously as he rubbed his forehead.

Bernice's heart pounded her chest. This was no time to piss Al off. Especially now that it appeared to be off of Nicholas. "You are the only person who lead the family right now. You know this is true."

Al looked at Bernice, “Mercedes was a lot of things and now in a few hours she would have gone and made herself a got damn mother. She doesn’t even want to be a part of the family anymore. Can you believe that?!” He said. “She doesn't want to be Don,” he said irritatedly.

Bernice covered her mouth in feigned shock. She had heard this before. Though at the time she did believe it was true. “You believe her?” She questioned genuinely interested in his mindset. She shook her head lightly, “I believe at some point in time all the kids dream of something different. Maybe she’s just experiencing those aspirations later in life?” Bernice did ponder another question… How did Rebecca feel about all of this? Since she was in the stew pot… “What about Rebecca. I mean right now she is the underboss?”

Al paused sighing “yes, because I know her” he told the woman “she’s determined and she gets what she wants” he breathed. “Rebecca will get over it, I just-“ he shook his head. “Mercedes is a better fit to lead, she knows what it means to rule with an iron fist… and” he sighed “carry a little care for those around her rather she shows it or not” he said.

"I see." Bernice nodded, deferring to the Don's knowledge of his children. Even if she held her own reservations to the contrary. He'd lead the family to long to doubt his assessment now. "I can see that. She was about to have me killed at their engagement party. " she chuckled thinking about the girl.

At the woman’s comment Al furrowed his brows “is that right?” he asked her, not having known about that.

Bernice actually giggled, dropping her head then shaking out her red curled ringlets. “Don't seem so shocked. I'm sure you've wanted to end my life from time to time. She is your child. Anyway," brush past her comments. “I can see what you mean about Tiny. I guess now only time will tell."

“I’ve desired other things, that was never one” Al corrected, looking back behind them and he nodded. “Yes” he sighed “time” he replied back to her as he moved to retrace their steps back towards his wife.

Bernice sighed and left the comment to hang in the air. Al was a very dangerous man even after all their years of acquaintance, she had to walk a line with man, the key was never be caught off guard or alone. She nodded shaking her head in agreement with the Don.

Nicholas glanced at the clock on the wall. Wasn't there a way to time contractions. He thought standing now by the side of the bed. "Ummm… you sure they can't give something? Freddie go get the nurse."

“I don’t want anything,” Mercedes said, blowing out a large breath of air. “Freddie don’t you move” she snapped. “I can do this without medical intervention” she said as she shifted against the bed again, dropping her head back against the pillow as her contraction subsided.

Nicholas stood dumbfounded, sighing heavily he shook head from side to side. "You are being stubborn." He smirked, then leaned down and kissed her lips. "I like it. I'll be right back." Nicholas strolled to the door, looking back only briefly as went. The door clicked softly behind him and he looked up shocked to see his mother. "I thought I told the family to lay low." He said, looking to his mother.

Bernice stepped beside Donna, when Nocholas emerged from the hospital room. She chuckled lightly, "You weren't talking to me." She said simply. "Can I go in to see Tiny?"

Nicholas' growled, jaw tightening. He didn't answer his mother. Instead he turned to Al. "A word," he asked, tilting his head in the opposite direction to where the women were seated.

Al looked towards Nicholas as he surfaced, he looked between him and his mother as they bantered before he nodded his head. He began walking hands in his pockets as he did.

Nicholas swept the hall with his eyes physically counting the men present. Shaking his head slowly, took to quick steps to catch up with the Don, ducking his head in deference. "Did they find anything we can use at the house?" He asked as he walked beside the man.

Bernice scoffed, "the joys of having a capo for a son never stop." He exhaled and looked to Donna, "Shall we. Tiny may believe she needs Nicholas, but we both know that a lie." She said, standing she moved to the door and knocked, slipping her head in, "can I come in?"

Al looked at Nicholas and shook his head “no” he breathed simply to the man. “Gone without a trace” he said honestly. “I am sure they left the same way they came, like thieves in the night…”

Donna looked to Bernice and smirked at the woman’s words “why not” she said as she looked to stand up, grabbing her hand bag.

Mercedes shifted, pulling herself upright in the bed and tossing up her hand when Freddie’s foot moved. “I’m fine” she reminded him with a huff as she stretched her short body a bit, her back aching. When she heard the knock she looked to see her mother-in-law and she nodded “yeah” she told her.

Nicholas paused and sighed hand running through his hair, watching as his mother and Donna disappeared into Mercedes' room. "Dammit! All we got is the Russians. I'd say let’s set up a meeting but at this point we’d just walk into a trap." He said thinking more out loud than anything else. Frustrated the leaned against the wall, licking his lip nervous at what he was about to propose. "Al I think once the baby is born, I should take Mercedes away for a while." He said in hushed tones.

Bernice grinned as she moved into the room. Immediately she grimaced. "You need more pillows." She said shaking her head and moving to buzz the nurse.

Al folded his arms over his chest as Nicholas went off on a tangent, he didn’t interrupt instead he let the man speak. And then when he was done he nodded his head “I won’t fight you on that” he said shockingly. He expected her to drop her kid and get back to work however, that wasn’t going to happen obviously.

Donna followed behind Bernice, looking at Mercedes before she found her seat knowingly.

Mercedes looked at Bernice as she came into the room and she shook her head at the woman. “I’m fine” she told her quietly.

Bernice tilted her head quizzically backing away from the phone. "Okay…" she sighed. Hand going to the middle of her back she rubbed it in remembrance of old pain. Clapping her hands together, "Well, dear… ready or not. Is there anything you need?" She asked looking at Donna who had found a seat by the bed.

"Listen, I know it's not what you want but you didn't …." Nicholas cut his prepared argument, face shocked. "You agree?" He intoned in a voice mixture of shock, disbelief, and relief. "Good." He said exhaling, hands going to his knees. “Good. I think the fewer people who know we have left the better. We’ll start out at the safe house I’ve set up then move from there.”

As Bernice spoke Mercedes inhaled and exhaled evenly, shaking her head at the woman. “Uh, uh” she managed to exhale as another contraction wrecked through her. “I’m peachy” she growled, closing her eyes and resting her head back against the bed.

“Didn’t what?” Al questioned “see tons of bodies scattered across your estate?” he asked. “Pay the NYPD thousands to keep their damn mouths closed?” he pressed. “See the hide out you stuffed her in that didn’t do much hiding?” he glared. “Newborns are hard work just how do you plan to run off into no man’s land with one?”

Bernice nodded as she watched the girl clearly in pain. "First children are always the hardest. I'm glad you're up for the challenge. D’onofrio are stubborn son of bitches like to play rent in your womb." She said hold on to the bed rails.

Nicholas bite down on his hard enough to draw blood. The metallic taste of life and death serving as a calming agent against the onslaught of calamities his father in law hurled at him. He ducked his head and kicked at something imagined on the floor, "I have another safe house it's real off the books. It's in a quiet place homey." He shrugged "She'll like it there."

“Yeah well I am married to one so that isn’t shocking” Mercedes said to the woman before she leaned upright again. With her head of hair a mess of wild curls she finger combed them to one side and looked over at Donna with green eyes. Her eyes moved to Bernice again and she said “how long were you in labor with Nicholas?” curiously.

Al looked at Nicholas, turning away from him and saying “I see” with a head nod. “Nothing to fight you on here” as he moved to walk away. “Is that all you wanted?” he asked him “I’d like to go smoke a cigar now” he told him.

Bernice moved to fluff Mercedes pillows as the girl sat up. She sighed heavily after a moment tapping her finger on the bed rail. "Nicholas? I was in labor for 36 hours with him." She said, shaking her head. “In the end they ended up giving me a Csection."

“36 hours?!” Mercedes said back to the woman, the pain subsided and her body relaxed tension leaving it. “A c-section” she breathed as she looked down at her rounded stomach in the bed. She looked back up at her mother, worry in her face now.

“Well yes. You shouldn’t worry though everyone’s labor experience is different. Personally I admire you gusto. With my first the luxury of painkillers wasn’t offered. I learned better with the last of my children.” She patted Mercedes' hand softly. “How is the breathing going for you. Is it helping much?”

Nicholas turned towards the wall, holding himself off the surface with his knuckles. The pain in his leg was starting to spike despite his attempts to keep the pain at bay. One thing down and a hundred to go. He turned and looked at Al’s retreating form, for the first time in life starting to feel that another life was just what the doctor ordered. “Thank you for your time sir.” He said, standing up straight.

“Yep” Al replied, reaching into his coat pocket for a cigar. He flicked it upwards acknowledging the boy as he continued to walk down the hall.

Mercedes eyes left Donna and moved to Bernice again. “Uh” she said with a light shrug as she laid back “I guess it helps a little” she told her. “I don’t want to be here for 36 hours doing this dance with him but I guess I could” she breathed.

Donna looked between the two before she said “12 tops with Rebecca, no drugs, and no Al” she said, looking at the girl.

Slinking up the hall with an air of complete self possession Rebecca appeared. She glanced at her father who was moving towards her but did not stop. Yes she was here to report to the Don, but she want to see her sister. She moved past the guard and opened the door to Tiny’s room. She chuckled hearing her name. "What did they say about the devil?" She said standing in the doorway.

Nicholas’ scowl deepened then hit the floor. Ice cold rage entering his body as he saw Rebecca. He moved past Al, a deliberate stride, wondering what had happened to bring her out of hiding.

Donna looked up to see Rebecca and she smirked fondly “speaking of” she replied to the girl.

Mercedes looked to see Rebecca and despite her attempt the smile never reached her face. Why was she here out of all people? Yes, her acting at her wedding was pretty good but this. This happened to be different. She all but tried to destroy their marriage so why celebrate the birth of their first child.

The door shut as Rebecca moved over to her mother's side, laughing. "Well, I'm sure I was joy enough." She said She bending to kiss Donna's cheek lovingly. Straightening, "Bernice…" she nodded focusing on Mercedes. "This all seems fitting. You were the baby doll type." She committed crossing her arms over her chest.

Nicholas entered the room at full speed. circling the door he eyed Rebecca cautiously. "Anything to report?" He asked looking at his wife, then back to Rebecca.

Mercedes looked to Donna and then Rebecca, again she tried to laugh or smile but it didn’t reach. Instead she made it apparent how she truly felt by stating “the very dolls you stopped at nothing to destroy… I suppose dear sister” she breathed. Inhaling and exhaling, she finally looked up at her and peered into her eyes. When Nicholas showed she looked at him and shook her head “not really” she breathed.

Rebecca shrugged, “Kids will be kids. I was acting out.” She said, reflectively, “Forgive me, I went from being a spoiled only child to a big sister without warning. You can’t still hold that against me?” She asked cutting off when Nicholas entered the fray. “Brother in law…” She smirked, “Nothing. Outside of what you all already know. I was able to find out that most of the thugs were hired guns, with only the main group being Russian. They used them as cannon fodder for the most part. After that I thought it was only right I come here to support the family.”

Nicholas clenched his teeth, trying hard to relax. He moved to Mercedes placing a protective hand on her forearm, nodding as Rebecca spoke. “Do you need anything?” He asked quietly to his wife, brushing her hair back with his free hand. He looked back to Rebecca, “You should go give that report to Al. I’m sure he’ll want to know.

Donna shifted in her seat looking between Mercedes and Rebecca, she was deciding if she were going to speak up or be quiet. As long as she could remember the two had been at each other’s throats.

Mercedes raised a brow, before she scrunched her face in disgust “oh forgive me” she stressed agitatedly. “I forgot at 9 months old I asked your father to do that” she snapped.

“Mercedes” Donna breathed tenderly before she looked at Rebecca. “Rebecca, your sister is in active labor do you think this is the time or place to put on a show?” she asked her with a tilted head. “Yes, your father would love to hear that” she said agreeing with Nicholas, offering the room a smile.

Mercedes eyes rolled over to Donna, just mere moments ago she was facing death to then venture off into motherhood weeks before her actual deadline and here Rebecca was being the usual annoyance she always was. She took the time to sink in the bed, ignoring the contraction she was having. She wouldn’t give Rebecca that satisfaction right now. Looking at Nicholas she shook her head at him, looking down at nothing in particular as she inhaled sharply through her nose.

“And I did?” Rebecca countered in the space of a moment. “Contrary to what you think I’m not here to argue with you. I know I’ve been less than perfect. I’m trying to change.” Her hand went to her mother’s shoulder as her full mouth went into a sad little pout. She folded in on herself visibly in front of everyone. “Yes… I suppose you are right. Brother-in-law” She stressed tossing her hair lightly over her shoulder she quickly moved to the door and exited the room. Outside she took in a deep breath, the move to where her father was smoking. “Father.”

Bernice watched the going ons with the cool disconnection that was completely fake. Her ears were alert while her eyes studied Nicholas and Mercedes with a mother's concern on face.

Nicholas rubbed his hand down Mercedes back, "thank you, I believe talking to Al would be best. Underboss." He ended using her formal title. Despite the complete lack of respect he felt. Turning completely to his mother now. "Is everyone safe. We don't know what these people want… at least tell me you did that much."

At her words Mercedes raised a brow, her mouth twisted in disgust as she thought about the audacity of Rebecca’s lie. “Right” she said simply in response as she shifted her body again, still fighting against her pesky contraction. When the woman left she growled lowly to herself, releasing another harsh breath as Nicholas unhelpfully rubbed her back.

“Rebecca” Donna replied to the girl’s remark, as she went on she nodded her head. “That’s a good girl,” she said, patting the girl’s hip lovingly. She watched the girl go and she rested back against her seat again.

Al stood out front, just down the hall from everyone, he sighed in the cool air. Using his lighter to relight the cigar he heard Rebecca and looked up “the kid is here?” he asked, prepared to finish her statement as he turned to her, eyeing over.

Rebecca looked back at the door, shaking her head. “No the kid takes after his mother he will come when he is good and ready. Needless to say, I’m not exactly welcomed in there.” She shrugged softly then looked back to her father. “We’ve cleaned up as much as we could at their home and are running down the connection to local dead guys. We’ve got the Mitchel brother under surveillance. An easy amount of the hired guys were from their crew. Would you like us to talk to them?”

Bernice rolled her eyes. “Nicholas this isn’t my first war. Calm down. If they wanted us they would have hit us before you guys, or at the same time. Don’t be foolish.” She fuseed, She said, watching Mercedes struggle through a contraction. “Besides, do you actually think I would miss the birth of my grandchild. I’ve never missed one and I refuse to start now.” she said sheepishly, her eyes rose to meet Nicholas again. “Everyone but Paul has been placed underlock and key,” She finally said, moving around the bed to stand by her son’s side. “You just be here. At this moment. Okay?”

“Mother?” Nicholas fussed, not backing down. She alway thought she was the smartest of them all and that bothered him greatly. “You don’t know for sure what any of this is or what will happen. None of us do. Don’t be so flippant”. He relaxed only marginally as she finally offered the information he wanted to know. “Must you always be you.” He sighed, “I’m here mother. Can someone please go tell the nurse to give her something, or at least come in and let us know if everything is okay.” He said finger raking through his hair.

Al chuckled at Rebecca lightly, “why not?” he asked her “your sister needs your support now more than ever” he said honestly. “That shit can’t be easy, no matter the woman or her measured strength,” he said with a headshake. As she went on to tell him something he’d actually like to hear he nodded slowly “mhm” he said processing what she had said. “Yes” he told her with a head nod. “Do just that” he said exhaling a cloud of smoke.

Mercedes swallowed thickly and she shook her head “I don’t need anything Nicholas” she groaned, a whimper escaping her before the pain subsided. She exhaled slowly, one of her hands moving to her stomach pressing flatly against its roundness. “Okay” she said catching her breath “that was like a 9 out of 10” she said nodding her head.

Donna looked between the son and mother, much like watching a tennis match she only pulled her eyes and ears away when she heard Mercedes struggles. She stood up and moved a little closer “maybe you should have them give you something” she said softly. “It’s not a sign of weakness, just alleviate some pain” she suggested. “I’ll go get a nurse,” she told them. It was obvious why they were slow to budge, they knew who they were and anybody who did feared them.

Rebecca regarded her father for a long moment, the old bastard, wasn’t there even for her birth and now he had the nerve to expound on what his bastard needed. She kicked at nothing on the floor, then looked back up. “Old wounds die hard father.” she said simply. “Old wounds.” She waited dutifully as he mulled over her idea, then nodded quickly as he gave his approval. “Consider it done.” She said, already back away from the man. “I’ll let you know what we find out.”

Nicholas rolled his eyes grinding his teeth at his wife's continued resistance to medicine. “Baby... “ he said, trying to keep the base out of his voice. “I agree with your mother,” He said then added “Thank you Donna.”

Mercedes watched her mother disobey her and she looked at Nicholas “I can do this” she stressed to him. “All the stuff we’ve witnessed, we’ve done, like tonight for instance” she told him “I can push out this baby on my own” she said, if she said it enough she would convince herself of just that eventually. “And it is a sign of weakness” she corrected sadly lip quivering, turning her head from him.

Nicholas touched his mother’s hand, lightly. “Leave us for a moment.” he told the woman, eyes only on Red.

Bernice inhaled, then nodded knowingly to her son. “Donna wait up, I’d like to have a word with that nurse as well”.

Nicholas rounded the bed, and pulled over the chair sitting down to rest his leg. “Red.” he said restlessly, “what’s this about? We have the best staff in the world here to help you deliver this child. Why are you being so damn stubborn? Is this natural birth shit really what you want to do?” he asked, feeling a little guilty this was the first time he’d even thought about this aspect.

Mercedes watched Bernice leave and she looked down at the bed she was in, when Nicholas pulled up beside her she looked at him as he spoke. She sighed softly and said “I did a lot of research and it’s better for the baby and I” she told him at first. Which wasn’t a lie at all if she were to be honest with him. However she went on “I don’t know” she answered back to him getting emotional, yet again. “It’s just, while he’s in here I can protect him from some things, but once he’s out” she cried “I don’t know” she said shaking her head as she wiped a few tears. “I’m scared” she admitted “I didn’t really know what to expect and I didn’t imagine it like this” she cried to her husband as a hiccup left her. “I-I-” she stammered working herself up “didn’t picture i-i-t going like t-this” she said her hand covering her wet eyes, her other gripping the bed’s railing as another contraction wrecked through her.

Nicholas sat back and let Red explain herself. He nodded softly, unable to argue against what she was saying. He didn’t know if it was true or not. As she came down to the heart of her feelings, he swallowed then looked to Freddie before he reached for his wife’s fingers, “Shhh,” He squeezed her hands. “Hey… this might not be your dream situation. But even you have to admit, having both your baby daddys here is a blessing.” He waited for her to gather herself, “We are leaving as soon as the baby is born. Far away from here and all the bullshit. You don’t have to be scared. Not anymore.” He promised.

Mercedes dropped her hand as Nicholas reached for her fingers, squeezing her hand and she sniffled hard. At his joke she looked over at Freddie and then “not funny” she said softly those I was amusing. As he went on she looked at him, she couldn’t tell if he was just saying that to her to calm her down or what. So she shook her head a little wiping her tears a little more “yeah right” she said quietly as she exhaled softly the pain subsiding, she laid her head back on the pillow shifting down a bit as she looked at Nicholas, lacing their fingers together.

“Yes it is. You and I both know he’s going to change way more diapers than I ever will.” Nicholas continued, not joking in the least. “No.. I told you we were going to leave the house and got raided. I almost lost you. I am a lot of things but a fool isn’t one of them. We are leaving. Just get our son here safe and sound and we’ll have a new house safe from harm.”

Freddie looked over to the both of them, wondering if Nicholas was actually telling the truth and what it all meant. As they went on he looked down for a moment before he looked back, raining a stone wall despite.

Mercedes held Nicholas hand close, chuckling a little at his words “Freddie has 3 kids, he should be a pro” she breathed looking over at him before she looked at Nicholas again. She dried her eyes a little more before she nodded her head at him slowly “okay” she said reasoning with him, her other hand moving to her stomach. “I can do that,” she said softly, calming down and letting some of the nervousness melt away.

Donna stood before the nurses station “my concern is the strain” she vocalized “and the fact that originally when he got here both her and the babies vitals were alarming” she added. “Remember, her blood pressure” she pointed. “She thinks she doesn’t need the drugs, but mother knows best,” she said with a small smile.

“Three kids…” Nicholas whistled looking at the silent man. “I had no idea. Wow.” He kept her hand in his and leaned back in the chair, “I know you can. Mercedes you're about to be a mother… The best mother. Strong and sure… quiet as it’s kept, I got the feeling you’re going to be a lot like my mother. Which I find sort of scary.” He said looking towards the hospital door.

Bernice stood beside Donna red nails clicking on the counter of the nurses station. Donna’s nice yet threatening approach was another feather in the ladies hat. She really did like the sweet woman. “You heard Mrs. M dear. Get off your ass while you still have one.” She add with a smirk.

XXX

Despite everyone’s protest hours earlier, now at the tail end of this never ending battle Mercedes regret choosing to ignore those protests. Her mother-in-law had jinxed her, or cursed her depending on who you asked. At a whopping 23 hours she still found herself battling with their unborn son. He was proving to honestly be just like his mother and father “whew” left Mercedes in a strangled groan as she huffed through the now excruciating pain. And as if 23 hours wasn’t far too long to punish someone she sat their 9 centimeter, just 1 shy of victory and her son hadn’t budged in an hour. She told herself in the moment sweat pouring from her forehead that if she survived this “I am never doing this again” in a deep growl, squeezing Nicholas' hand as hard as her body allowed.

Nicholas bared his teeth, trying to endure the pain this wife was inflecting on his hand. The time for witty exchanges had left hours ago. All he wanted was his son, a shower and sleep. And at this point, the order of those wants were switching by the second. With bloodshot eyes, that bore a hole in the nurse who stood at the foot of the bed, “This can’t be normal… isn’t there something you can do?”

The nurse's eyes peered past the man, she looked to check Mercedes vitals as well as their son’s before she looked back down. “He’s fine” she said tugging her gloves off “I can see the top of his head” she commented. She moved to page her doctor. After she had done so she grabbed a new pair of gloves. “Here let’s get you ready” she said to Mercedes, the girl assisted in getting Mercedes feet in the stirrups before she attentively dried sweat from the woman’s neck and face. “You are doing so good, a trooper to go this long with no epidural” she commented calmly.

Mercedes released Nicholas' hand and grabbed the beds railing, her back arching slightly as she released another loud groan. At the girl's statement and page, she looked down, releasing another groan. “I’m never doing this again,” she said shaking her head “never doing this again, never doing this again” her words a jumbled plea for help, laced with exhaustion, and agony. As the girl positioned her the way that she needed her Mercedes tried to regain some strength and sanity. “Oh” she cried as her back arched again, she continued to grip the railing on the bed as she inevitably fell into temptation and began to push. Bearing down she didn’t wait for further instruction truly, whatever she was doing came naturally and it was edging her closer to some relief.

“The head?” Nicholas exclaimed, trying to look and backing away at the same time. “Next time say something. Standing there all mute and shit.” Confused he stood by the side of the bed dumbfounded as Mercedes was helped into a new position. “Yeah, baby you are doing great.” He added lamely, feeling a nervousness that hadn’t been there two seconds ago. “I’m here. Just breathe okay… Should she be pushing?” He asked, wondering where the doctor was. “Doesn’t a doctor need to be in here?”

“His head” the girl repeated, rounding the bed the young girl proceeded to set up what was necessary for the doctor ignoring his other remark. She looked at Nicholas and then Mercedes “he’ll be here any moment, don’t worry. It’s fine, she’s doing what her body requires… naturally” she said calmly to him. When she was done she moved back to Mercedes and nodded her head pleasantly “you are doing amazing” she breathed happily offering Mercedes her hand if she needed it. Her eyes moved back down between the woman’s legs watching closely before she heard the door open behind them and the older guy rush in. She only parted ways with Mercedes to assist him, gearing him up.

Mercedes exhaled loudly as she laid her head back on the bed looking at Nicholas with eyes that screamed either be supportive or get your ass out. He told her she was doing good however it went through one ear and out the other “I” she breathed deeply “am going to make you go stand in a corner if you don’t leave her alone” she snapped at him, eyes deadly. When her doctor showed she huffed loudly, puffing her cheeks out. “I thought you were going to miss all of the fun” she told the man her back arching again.

The older guy moved into the room as quickly as his legs carried, truthfully somewhere down the line a nap was needed. Imagine being held hostage at your place of work for a full 20+ hours. Mercedes wasn’t the only person exhausted, was all he could say to this current situation. When he entered he geared up with the help of the nurse and rolled some gloves on. Hearing Mercedes he chuckled lightly “of course not, I was contemplating grabbing us some pop and pizza to bring to the party” he joked lightly as he sat before her. “You are doing good, next contraction give us a big push” he told her happily.

Nicholas raised an eyebrow, but let the girl slide as he focused more on his Mercedes words. He nodded quietly, feeling out of his element entirely. He took the off handed dismissal on the head and moved out the way to allow the newly arrived doctor and the nurse to do the job they had been paid for. Easing to the foot of the bed he stood near Freddie, and scrubbed his hand down his pants then thread his fingers into his hair.

“How thoughtful of you” Mercedes said back to the doctor before she beared down, her hand still gripped the bed’s railing for dear life. Her other slid to the back of her thigh as she pushed roughly against the contraction, a strangled cry left her before she pressed her lips in a tight line. “Oh my goodness” she said, her head falling back against the pillows behind it. “Oh” she groaned, looking down between her legs.

The older man smirk at Mercedes adjusting the mask on his face a little before he watched as the woman pushed with all of her might. He shifted on the stool a little arms extended as he helped to guide the newborn’s head. “Good,” he said cheerfully, “his head is out,” he said to her. “Next contraction he should be out” he told the woman as he reached for the suction, suctioning the boy’s nose and mouth carefully.

The nurse grabbed a blanket and gently laid it across Mercedes' chest carefully, when she started pushing again she made sure to have the examination area prepped for when the baby is born. She moved to grab a pair of gloves and she handed them to Nicholas, moving to push the man right back at Mercedes' side, a little lower even so that he didn’t miss the show or finale. After all these hours of annoying them to death over the woman he thought he was going to stand on the side lines? Oh no, he was going to be all in today. “He’s almost here…” she reminded him.

Nicholas could run the world. Kill a man without flinching, but standing in this room watching his wife give birth he was helpless. Taking the gloves hesitantly, he slipped his long fingers into the glove without prodding. Cutting the umbilical cord was a dad thing, at least in the movies it was. Gloved, he stood like an out of place rag doll while the nurse and doctor cheered Red on. The experience was too wild for him to take it all in.

Freddie’s eyes stayed focused straight ahead as Tiny along with the help of staff worked diligently to bring the child into the World.

Mercedes groaned softly before she beared down and pushed against her contraction once more. Using all the strength she had to muster, she gripped the railing extremely hard as pushed the child out in two tries. Mercedes rested back against the bed releasing the rail finally as she looked down.

Mercedes’ doctor sat there watching the child as his mother pushed him out with ease. When Nicholas' hands were gloved he shifted over a little to allow the man to catch the little boy. “Right here, just cup your hands” he directed.

Watching the tall man put the gloves on the woman brought him closer to his wife, moving him closer to the view of their son and when she did she gestured with her head. “Go on” she encouraged him without much thought.

Nicholas’ head swivelled away from the happenings, as his rooted feet struggled to remain in place as the nurse pushed him south of the Mason Dickson line. ‘Was this normal protocol.’ He thought wildly, now standing beside the doctor. Nicholas looked oddly at the doctor’s face. He wanted him to catch the baby? His eyes tracking down to the doctor’s cupped hands. Yep! That was the plan. Nicholas squatted slightly, for a better position, for a moment more a man taking instruction from a coach than a father to be. The doctor helped support the baby’s neck as he reached down to catch the rest of the body. Hand holding his son's tiny body the Capo, killer, looking up to Red’s haggard and speechlessly grinned. He went back to the baby’s face, hands sure now. He’d never drop him. He laughed out loud, what sounded like a half sob. And before he knew it, he had all of his son’s long body in his hands. He huffed out more laughing sobs, “Hey boy.” He said, still holding him tightly.

Mercedes shifted slightly, her eyes falling on her husband as he held the now screaming bundle in his hands. They swapped glances and she smirked softly to herself, a tear she was unaware of rolling down her cheek at the sight of their son. He happened to be the picture of perfection and far more magical than she expected, it was hard to believe even now that she had carried him for nearly nine months in her womb.

The nurse smirked at the man, she moved towards him with a warm blanket and gestured her head towards his wife. “If you hand him over you can help us with something else” she breathed preparing to offer the man the surgical scissors he’d use to cut the boy’s umbilical cord. When the man feet finally carried him to his wife she’d wrap the bundle up, clean him off a bit and let the doctor and new father do their jobs.

Nicholas beamed down at the little screaming bundle in his hands. The yells were strong and loud, everything a D’onofrio should be. Instantly, everything in Nicholas' life was changed. The nurse got his attention and Nichlas looked over the woman as if she was the novice. He laid the baby in her hands slowly, reluctantly then gave the woman a warning look. He took the scissor then followed the doctor's instructions cutting his son free from his first home, with steady hands. Comfortable in the role he’d play in his son’s life from this point forward. He handed over the scissors then took off his gloves, moving up to Mercedes side. He leaned in and kissed her softly on the forehead. “Thank you.” He whispered into her hair. “He is absolutely perfect.”

The young girl smirked at the dazed man, it was amusing to her. It was as if everything he needed in life was suddenly handed to him. She moved the crying bundle towards his mother, rocking him gently as he did. She rested him on his mother’s chest, which subsequently quieted him a lot. She made sure he was bundled, knowing how very important it was for a child to be in its mother's arms the second it breathed life.

Mercedes watched as the wailing child was placed on her chest and she looked down at him. His red skin as loud as his scream she pecked him sweetly quieting him down, her hand instinctively moving to his small back as she rubbed him lovingly. When Nicholas moved towards her, her sparkling eyes looked up at his. He kissed her on the forehead which only made her eyes close as she basked in it. He whispered thank you and she opened them nodding at him slowly, his statement made her look down at the boy again. “Did you hear that Michael?” she sweetly said to the baby “you are absolute perfection, mommy and daddy are so happy you are finally here” she said kissing his tiny pink lips.

Nicholas reached down stroking the tiny fingers of his son’s hands. “Michael…” He repeated, the shocked expression in his tone. He cleared his throat, and tried to speak, then licked his lips, steadying his broken and heavy voice. He fought back tears, swallowing a huge lump in his throat. “Michael.” He repeated once more, wrapping his arm around Red’s shoulder squeezing her to him closer.

Mercedes continued to watch the little boy, her hand rubbing his small back sweetly. She was in awe, she’d really birthed a baby and with Nicholas no less. She kissed the little boy’s forehead and smirked looking up at Nicholas again “mhm” she replied “Michael Nicholas D’onofrio” she breathed to him before she looked back down at the baby wiggling against her bosom.

#samcedes rp #thread: michael #thread.

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justmikethepoet · 6 years ago

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At 11 it was “a little lipstick like mommy.” But that cherry would eventually turn into sour grapes Now I know it’s late so I won’t keep you. But Lois Lane bagged Superman with an a-cup and a overbite But you picked up all these shifts for overnight Because you just booked a flight to get your butt lifted At 13 her bra was still in training, while other girls had enough to play with These days the playground is dangerous And daddy ain’t home to tell you that you’re amazing so You let what you think boys like, make you throw yourself esteem out the window to get frostbite. And that my friends is the coldest winter ever. If he leaves you for a girl he thinks is prettier, let him. Not enough of my sisters are soldiers. They’ll fix their lips, hips, put on a full lace, beat face, and still can’t get the man to come over. But when the body is XL the Uber is too. Her 16th wasn’t the sweetest. She’s been stressed, so her dress doesn’t fit And we live in world that would rather have you shape your waste with a trainer, than throw on some sweats and take the dress to the cleaners That’s the first night she googled lipo. Now i know what you’re gonna say, Michael, a woman’s body is her temple, not yours, so no thank you But all I’m saying is if you keep changing what God looks like, than how can I pray to her 17 was the first time she sent a picture without pants Now what’s gross is the guy texted back giving directions Let’s call him Lance- for arguments sake. Keep mind it’s already late, but he saw her vulnerability as opportunity I guess that’s why she got knocked up. PSA: Any doctor that performs cosmetic surgery without a therapists consent should be locked up Too many women pissing perfect investment property money on the payment, to give people that run game something to play with. If the only brick house you have is the one you walk around with, you’ll end up bankrupt like the circus trying to get a ring from these brothers, I wanna tell you that you’re on some clown shit But they only wear makeup for work. By 18 she couldn’t pick up milk from the market without making sure her eyebrows, mascara and edges were flawless, and if that’s not worth crying over... https://www.instagram.com/p/B6sPYFDFPpT/?igshid=1gzw157dfl890

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tinalbion · 6 years ago

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Could you write hcs for Leslie, Norman (Psycho), and Brahms with a Male s/o finding out he's getting leg braces? I'm really scared abt not being lovable now that my disabilities going to be obvious because of the braces o~o

Oh, honey, you will ALWAYS be lovable. Something like leg braces doesn't define who you are and these beautiful men know that. I'm always here to talk if you need it anon, you're still gonna be you ♡

Leslie

You were absolutely livid when you found out at your appointment that getting leg braces was the only option, and you had almost stormed out of the office, but your doctor knew it would be a difficult transition for you to get used to. You tried your best to convince her that you were fine, you didn't need them, but she assured you there were worse options to go with, especially later down the line. When you left, you immediately went to your boyfriend Leslie's place, the one place you would hopefully forget about your personal bullshit.

Glen Echo was a small town occupied by very trusting people, Leslie somewhat being one of them, so his door was usually open. When you made your way inside, the entire house was quiet. You called out for him, but suddenly he was behind you and he scared you half to death. He laughed as you turned around and quickly swung at him, catching your arm as he wiggled his eyebrow.

"Nice try, babe, but not quick enough," he teased.

"What the hell, Leslie?!" you cried out in fear, "you almost gave me a heart attack!"

"Just means I'm getting better, right?" His carefree attitude was something that was rather charming to you, but you were in no mood to play around. He noticed your expression and tilted his head to look at you. "What's up? You don't seem too great right now."

"Yeah, I'm really not," you replied shortly.

Leslie smirked and tapped on your shoulders with his slender fingers and bit his bottom lip, looking you deep in the eyes. "What's wrong, you know you gotta tell me. You're not really like this."

"It's not that important, really."

"Bullshit."

You scoffed and looked away, but quickly looked back to see those eyes, you were weak when he gave you that face. "My doctor appointment didn't go so well-"

"Do you want me to kill her?"

This made you chuckle and you shook your head in disbelief. "No, you idiot! I uh, well, would you love me even if something about me changed, like, physically?"

"What, like a a cosmetic surgery sort of thing? Because if that's the case, you really shouldn't because you know-"

"Leslie, I need to get leg braces," you finally spat out, cutting him off. "Because of all that crap I had to deal with, I'm now stuck with having to wear them for God knows how long. I'm going to look like a complete idiot."

Leslie threw his arm over your shoulder and hugged you to him as you almost started to cry. "Babe, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been a dick..." he sighed. "But you're wrong. Those things aren't gonna make you look like an idiot. That negative mindset is what's making you look like an idiot."

You looked up and glared at him. "Oh thanks."

He just laughed. "I'm serious! You can't think of it as a bad thing. They're gonna help, right? So let them work their magic and before you even know it, things will get easier. Besides, you're hot as hell with or without 'em." He gave you a large kiss on the side of your cheek and grinned.

"You know, sometimes you really do have great advice, when you're not talking out of your ass."

"Good thing this hasn't damaged your humor," he groaned playfully and began to pull you into the bedroom. "Come on hot stuff, we gotta work on that attitude of yours."

Norman

Norman is the most understanding out of these three, and he will always support you when you're not feeling like yourself.

When he finds out that you need leg braces, he sits you down and reminds you that there's absolutely nothing wrong with something like this, they're used to help you and have no way of defining who you are.

You were still down about the entire situation, but he was really set on making you see how he had seen you. With some convincing, he walked you into the kitchen and watched as you leaned against the counter, your eyes staring down at your legs as you envisioned them in those horrid things.

"They're going to help you, you know," he lectured you with a stern voice, causing you to look up at him.

You shook your head and bit your lip before letting out a small sigh. "Yeah I know, but the last thing I need is some idiot calling me names because-"

"They won't."

He had his secrets sure, but you knew deep down that he could make anything happen. You had never doubted him before, there was no reason to this time. You stood there and sighed as you hung your head, but he reached forward and lifted your chin up to meet his gaze. "Hey, pick a dish. Anything you want, I'm making it tonight for you. I'll run a hot bath and make sure there's plenty of candles. Anything to help you relax."

Norman was always so thoughtful, even when he thought Mother would disapprove, but because of you, the constant voice of hers that usually echoed loudly within his head had calmed. Norman did as he said and drew you a hot bath with your favorite scent, bubbles threatening to spill over the edge. He wanted you to relax while he began to cook your favorite dinner, and as you sink into the warmth of the water, you couldn't help but lay there for what seemed like hours. It was Norman who finally came upstairs and opened the door to check on you.

"You didn't respond," he panted, "I thought something happened." He greeted you with a towel and wrapped it around your body, hugging your form to his as he planted several drawn-out kisses along your shoulder.

Of course, you apologized for scaring him, but you felt so relaxed, you couldn't help but nod off even if just for a moment. Norman shook his head but chuckled, happy to know you were feeling somewhat better about things. After dinner, he guided you to the living room where you would both watch a movie, but because your mind was still elsewhere, he stroked your hair and played with the locks as you finally broke down and told him everything about how you were feeling.

"Whatever happens, it doesn't change who you are or who you have been, this is just a minor bump in the road. Obstacles will happen, but those things will help you, nothing more. If anything, this will help you build your character even further down the road, and you're already so strong, this will be nothing for you." With that, he placed a gentle kiss on your temple and smiled, your heart beating quickly as you looked into his eyes, knowing he meant every word.

Brahms

When things had settled down at the Manor after you had moved in with Brahms, you had transferred all of your records over to this new doctor you were set to see. You assured Brahms that you would only be a couple of hours at the very most, and you would pick up dinner on your way home. He whined a little, not wanting you to go, but he knew that it was something you needed to get out of the way.

After speaking with your new doctor, who seemed rather knowledgeable and kind, she seemed to point out a few abnormalities your previous doctor never caught up on. For safety, she had you take a couple of xrays to see if anything was out of place.

It took three hours for you to finally get home, and when you did with all of the food in hand, Brahms was there by the door within seconds to greet you. He leaned down and nuzzled the cold porcelain mask against your face.

"You're home," he sang happily.

You seemed distant and sad from what he could gather. "Yeah, I'll go and get dinner ready." You walked away, leaving him standing in confusion in the lobby, his brain turning with endless thoughts.

He crept in behind you moments later to find you standing in the kitchen, leaning against the sink with a blank expression on your face. His arms slid around your waist as he rested his chin on your shoulder, his eyes peering out the window.

"What is it?" he asked in his sweetly toned voice, "are you alright?"

"I think so," you replied quietly as you turned to face him. "I don't know what's going to happen, but I had a bad day at the doctor's." You didn't want to talk about it and you weren't really sure how to explain it to your boyfriend, he was innocent and unknowing about many things, what would he even think about it?

"Tell me."

"I have something wrong with my legs," you started out slowly, "and I'll have to wear leg braces all the time." You watched him as his eyes darted down and broke eye contact with you, that's when you knew he was thinking. "I'll still be able to walk, it'll just be difficult for me to do, but I have no other options."

Brahms's hand lifted to your face as the back of his hand softly caressed your cheek, as if to tell you everything would be okay. "I'll help take care of you."

This made you smile and you quickly brought him to you as you wrapped your arms around him, leaning into his taller frame. You two stood that way for a while as his hands entangled themselves within your hair, not knowing how else to comfort you.

"Just... promise me one thing?" You asked as you pulled away to look at him, tears welling up in the corners of your eyes. "Don't love me any less, okay?"

"I'd never dream of that," he scoffed, his voice echoing slightly beneath the mask as he placed his forehead against yours. "I will always love you."

#tinalbion writings #slashers imagine #slashers x reader #slasher requests #brahms imagine #brahms x reader #brahms hillshire #leslie vernon #leslie x reader #leslie imagine #norman bates #norman x reader #norman imagine #youre still wonderful #dont let this get you down #♡♡♡#pshyco #the boy (2016)#behind the mask the rise of leslie vernon

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missnctyukhei · 7 years ago

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Highschool Drama (pt.1) I student!lucas

Description: Life in high school is not easy, even if you are privileged. But everything changes when you meet Lucas, the new quarterback player. A project brings you together, but even if the feelings fit, a relationship seems to begin impossible.

Pairing: student!lucas!au x student!reader Genre: Highschool AU; angst, fluff, smut Warnings: little bit violence, profanity, racism; Wordcount: 7,6k a/n: Wow this is the longest story I post here. I've really spent a lot of time writing it and have been really trying to catch the mood of the story. There will be definitely a second part. Maybe a third, let's see how much it will be.

masterlist // tell me what you think //

"And? How do I look?" Your dad turns to you and smiled widely. During the summer holidays he had several suits tailored in Paris. They were perfectly adapted to his body and made him look even more powerful. That your father was the mayor of this city and that he owned almost all the properties in this country, often disturbed you. Your father had never a conscience. He threw people out of their homes, who could no longer afford the rent, demolish down their houses and built new luxury complexes on them. Your mother has not loved your father in a long time. Sometimes you thought she even hate him. She drowns her anger often in cosmetic surgery and other beauty treatments. "You look great dad." Are you saying honest and trying to smile. Your dad was a narcissist and he did not care to build a good relationship with you. Nevertheless, it was more important to him to give a good image to the public and you were perfect in this discipline. Everyone in the city had the thought that you have the perfect family. But behind the walls was only silence and hate. "Your grades need to get better this year, you should go to an elite university soon!" It was the first day of school and it was not too long before you finally left it for university. "Pretty girls don’t need good grades." Your mother took the last sip of her morning-margarita and put on a false smile. "Beauty alone does not help, she also needs a good university degree." Your father's words shot sharply against your mother. You roll your eyes and take a sip of your coffee. So, it went off almost every morning and you could not wait to leave the house. "Well, I have to go now." Your dad packed his briefcase and patted your shoulder: "Y/n, have a good first day at school, stay away from other ethnic groups." You just sigh and try, as always, to ignore your father's racist statements. After your dad left home, you also got up to take some bread, but suddenly your mother was behind you. "Carbohydrates make you fat, sweetheart." She raised an eyebrow and then turned away from you. You drop annoyed the piece of bread on the kitchen counter and take your bag.

Every day at the same time, your boyfriend Matthew stood in front of your door to pick you up with his Porsche that his father had given him for his sixteenth birthday. You grew up with Matthew and you were expected to come together. You did not know how it happened. At some point it was just like that. Matthew's dad was a close friend of your father and your wedding was planned before you were going to the kindergarten. Your dad loved your boyfriend. He was blond, had blue eyes, was a Christian and American citizen. He fit perfectly into the picture in your family. "Hey Babe!" He greeted you with a wink and you just get in his car annoyed. By now everything bothered you on him, his stupid smile, his unimaginative sayings, and his disgusting touches. You did not even want to be touched by him or kiss him. But you knew you had to sleep with him soon. He kept pointing it out and time was pressing. You were still a virgin and you were also the last in your circle of friends. You wanted to do it, but you could not. You did not want it, as if there was no desire for it. You never had that feeling, the pressure, to fuck with someone. Maybe that's why you should just try it, you thought. But Matthew was so rude and strong. Sometimes you were scared of him and you did not know how the sex would be with him. The thought of it scares you often. "Do you have cheerleader training today?" he asked as he drove down the street with a speed that was too high. You had asked him several times to get off the gas, but he never listened to you. "No, not until tomorrow." Your gaze is directed out the window and you can see the trees passing you. You just wanted to get out and get away from Matthew as fast as possible. You generally wanted to get away from everything, from school, from the city, from your family. It was not long until your 18th birthday. You often play with the idea to just run away, to go to another state or even to another country. Nobody could reach you there anymore and you would work somewhere in a small bakery, so you would follow your passion. Although you would lead a simple and poor life, but it would be rich in luck and love. You knew that if you stayed here, you would have to marry Matthew and you would be like your mother. You would be a lifeless shell and would try to drown your pain in alcohol. But you would not know anyway if you have the courage to just run away. It would completely change your life and separate you completely from your family. For your father, you wouldn’t existed for him anymore and you could never return. This thought made you incredibly afraid of this step. But before your 18th birthday, you could only dream.

With a dangerous speed, Matthew enters the school parking lot. When he turned, he caught a student on his bike. "Watch out", he said the boy shyly and almost more to himself. You knew him, he went to the same music class as you. His name was extraordinary, so you could remember him. Jungwoo, he was very shy but had an incredibly voice. Sometimes you thought that maybe he could only express himself with music because he barely spoke to his classmates. Often you thought about what he thinks of this life here. Was he happy? Sometimes you would like to talk to him. He would certainly have much knowledge and a very different view on this world, as your friends. "Out of the way geek! Go back to your country and eat dogs!" Matthew got out of the car and spread his shoulders. Jungwoo straightened up, picked up his bike and tried to get out of the way as quickly as possible. "That was really unnecessary." You take your bag and close the car door. You hated this racism so much and you just could not understand it. You knew that Matthew had this from his dad, but your dad was the same, and the ancestry and ethnicity did not matter to you. Matthew ignored your statement, because it was not worthy of him anyway. As a woman, you were not worth anything to him. You were not a full-fledged person for him. He has said that several times. A woman should cook and clean well for him and be good for fucking. That's it and it was the sad truth. "Yo, Matthew!" Liam, another football player like your boyfriend, waved him over. Without thinking about you, he immediately ran over to his friends and left you alone. But it was fine, because you wanted to be alone. You sat down on a bench and watched the goings-on in front of the school. Now and then someone greets you, but otherwise it was quiet around you. Jungwoo came by and he looked a bit ruined because of the accident. There was a big bruise on his forearm and you start to feel bad. Immediately you jumped up and walked over to him. "Does it hurt a lot?" You point to his arm as he looks over at you in surprise. “I-It-it....It’s okay.” He stuttered, because he was visibly nervous talking to you. You could not blame him, after Matthew had treated him that way, even you were afraid of your boyfriend. "Wait, I've always got something to doctor in my pocket. Cheerleading is more likely to cause injury than you think." Jungwoo did not say anything, but let it happen as you wrap the mulch over his forearm. "I know Matthew can be an ass. I'm sorry how he treated you, but he did not know it better. I know that's no excuse, I just hope he might change someday." When you're done, you release his arm and give him your sweetest smile. So you're hoping to temper a bit of Matthew's act a little bit. "Thanks" Jungwoo said softly. Then, as always, he lowered his head and went to school. You sigh and look after him a short time, as a familiar voice sounded. "Since when do we speak with weirdos?" Amber was the queen bee of your clique. Charlotte, Abigale and you were her followers. They were your friends, but sometimes you're not sure if they were only friends with you just because of your name. "Matthew almost ran him over, he was hurt." Automatically you try to justify yourself. Actually, they should not care with which people you talk to, but this was not normal life. That was the high school and everything was different. "That should be his concern, blame him if he's such a dork." Amber made her point, but you just try to ignore it.

It was the first day of school, but it felt like you'd never been away. Everything was as usual. The same people and the same students. Even during lunch, you were sitting at the same table. They were the same people as always. Amber, Charlotte, Abigail, you and Matthew with his football friends. You had nothing to talk about today. There was nothing here that you wanted to share with these people. More and more they alienate you and you do not remember how you should get away from it all. "Yo, Lucas, sit down with us." Your boyfriend releases his arm from your shoulder and waves a boy over from another table. "But he is a Korean!" Charlotte looked around in shock. "He's really cool, a great guy, he's our new quarterback. The coach says he can be one of the best." Lucas went with his tray to your table and stood in front of Matthew. "Thank you, but I think I'll sit back to my friends." With a raised eyebrow, Matthew looked over at the table, which Lucas gestured to. He leaned back and looked at his new team-member. "We are your friends now." "Where do you want to sit? Back to the Korean nerds? You do not belong to them anymore." Amber laughed, but her voice was arrogant. Everyone outside of this table was a weirdo for her and not worthy of notice. "I am a native Chinese." Said Lucas and stand still before the table. "Chinese, Korean, Japanese and Norwegian ... all the same." "Wait...What?" Lucas looks confused to Amber and could not understand this stupidity. "Just sit down with us, they will not give up." A light smile flits across your face and it has been the first honest laugh for him since today. Lucas yield, put the tablet across from you and sat down. "You're new to the school, right?" You try to start the conversation with Lucas with a little bit of Smalltalk. "Yes, I’m here for two weeks." He picked up the fork and poked around in his food. It does not seem to taste him and you wonder what else he would like to eat. You did not like this food either. You did not know for a long time how good food tastes. At home, you were under constant diet, as your mother watched you constantly and the food at school was just inedible. "We are very happy to have you in the team and we can easily win the season with you." Matthew really seemed happy to have Lucas with him. His team had lost last year and that made him really upset. While the others talked, Lucas continued to poke around in his food, but he did not cost a single piece. You watched him for a while and at that moment you were in a completely different world. His long fingers fascinated you and captured your full attention. But then they broke away from the metal cutlery. "I should go now, I have chemistry now and I still have to search the class." When he just wanted to get up, you also took your tray and lifted you from your seat. "Hey, I've got chemistry now too. I can show you where the class is." Lucas nodded and smiled slightly.

"And how do you like it here?" You clasp your books in front of your chest and you both stroll down the hallway. "Well, I have not seen much yet, but everyone seems nice." You just nod in silence and brush a strand of hair behind your ear. Nice was the right word. Everything was nice. But being nice also meant boring. For you in any case. When you arrive in the chemistry hall, you sit down at a table. Your friends were not in the class anyway and Lucas was new. Mr. Peppermount came annoyed, like every year, into the class and put the briefcase on his desk. "Well, did everybody make it again?", he greeted the class and placed himself on the teacher's chair. He cleared a notebook from his briefcase and flipped it over for a few minutes. Lucas turned to look at you questioningly and raised his eyebrows implausibly. You had to giggle, because you knew exactly what he was thinking. "Alright ..." The teacher huffed and turned to the class. "Since the director said that you need more practice in chemistry, I want you to do a group work this year, go together in pairs, I do not care about who, just leave me alone with a fight. Next Thursday I want to have your concept. There is no grace period." As Mr. Peppermount finished speaking, the students all began to whisper. "Do we want to go to a group?" You look wide-eyed at Lucas and wait for his answer. A smile formed on his lips and for the first time you can see what a beautiful mouth he had. His lips were so full and beautifully shaped that they would not leave your head. “Yes sure! Do you like to come to me after school to think about what we are doing? " "That sounds great." All you had to do was smile, but your gaze was still fixed on his mouth. "Do you like Thai food? My parents opened a restaurant here, so if you're hungry, we can eat something right away." Your breath caught for a moment, because you have already heard of this restaurant. Your father had talked about it and not positive. He forbade your mother and you ever to enter this shop because for him was foreign food disgusting. For your father where Lucas parents only immigrants who wanted to live on our taxes. Actually, you never thought much about entering this place because you almost never eat out. But Lucas changed the game. "I have never eaten Thai." You blushed a little when you told him this. You do not know why, but it was uncomfortable for you. "What you have never eaten Thai? Then you have never lived before!" He made big eyes when you confessed your disgrace. "Then it's time for you to try it, believe me, my mum cooks unbelievably. She's a true master." You smile, because somehow it was all exciting. On the one hand you break the rule of your father and on the other hand you try something new. It sounded ridiculous, but it felt like a small step forward for you.

Several weeks have passed and by now school life had returned. And even if everything was the same, everything was also different. Lucas reshuffled the cards and you enjoy the time, almost too much, with him. Your conversations with him were so intense, intellectual, but also incredibly funny. Even if you do not work for your project, you spend the time together. His mother always cooked something good for you two. Lucas had not lied, she was an incredible cook. You had gained a few pounds in the last few weeks, but it was alright for you, because you feel good. At Lucas, you felt safe and secure, and in fact you never questioned it. But slowly you realize that you were wearing your most beautiful clothes and put on a little more make-up, when you went out with him. Your pulse went up more and more as you entered his house and when he touched you. You wanted to spend every second with him, not a day without him. And at a point of conscience, you could not deny it, you were in love.

"Look my Mum left us sweets." Lucas came into the room and gave you your plate. You have already completed your project and you spend the evening just like that. Lucas invited you to his home every afternoon and night and you sensed that this love was not just one-sided. "Your mother is so cute." You go through the room and look at the details. The room was still quite empty, since his family moved in fresh. But nevertheless, this room was filled with love and cordiality. You feel good immediately. It was a home, not like yours. It was nothing fake, everything was real. "Yes my mum is the best." His eyes followed every step of yours. He watched exactly what you do, nothing would escape him. "I wish I had such a family too." You turn to him and lean slightly against the windowsill. Your eyes were lowered and your hands are buried in your mustard knit sweater. It was the first time you mentioned your family before him. But you had the feeling that you could be honest with him. “What's wrong with your family? " Lucas took a step towards you. He was curious because he did not really know anything about your parents. You would like to tell him every single detail, about all your worries and fears. You did not know why, but he triggered something in you. When you look at him, you feel well and secure. It was an unusual feeling that you have never felt before. Never have you felt so safe with someone. You had the feeling to be yourself with him. But even if you wanted to tell him everything, you'll just give it a simple answer. "It's complicated." The fear was victorious. You did not want that Lucas condemn you. You are ashamed of your family and what they did. He took another step forward until he was just in front of you. "But believe me, my family can also be very crazy, it's really exhausting." You had to laugh and your fingertips crawled out of the sweater again. It suddenly became very quiet between you two, almost seriously. But it all felt still easy even when he touched your fingers with his. Your heart began to throb as he buried his fingers completely in yours and you both starred at them for a while. He rested his forehead on yours and you feel his breath spread over your face. You were connected, you could feel it. You closed your eyes and tried to absorb the moment as well as possible. You did not want to forget this, you wanted to keep it deep in your memory. You smell his scent, you hear the melody of his heart. This moment should never pass. "What are we doing here?" He asked suddenly, releasing his forehead from yours. It almost broke your heart because you were so far away from reality that it felt like you were waking up from a beautiful dream. "I don’t know," you breath and also your hands broke away from each other. For a while you stood in silence. Nobody wanted to say something. "Maybe I should go." The situation became a bit uncomfortable over time and you reach for your bag to throw it over your shoulder. Lucas barely moved and you just let a deep sigh out. You knew you had to leave, but you did not want to. You turn around again, because you did not want to let him go so easily, but there he was already standing in front of you and his face was close to yours. Your heart started racing again and you look deep into his dark eyes. His full lips met yours and they joined in a kiss. He held his hands back and it drove you crazy. It was just his mouth that touched you. The rest remained on his body. But when his lip fused with yours, you felt it for the first time. This tingling, the charge and the sexual desire. You wanted more. You wanted more of him and more of his body. The desire should be satisfied. But his hands were still with him and not on you. You did no longer wanted an innocent kiss, it was he that you desire. "Touch me, Lucas." You take a deep breath to keep your body under control. You make him twitch his fingers and go in the direction of your body, but he stops just in front of your skin. "I wish I could, but .... You know, because of Matthew." He had to swallow and as he uttered the words, he regretted them again. For a moment you freeze and look at him. Your big eyes met his and none of you brought out another word. Lucas hand suddenly touched your skin and you feel the warmth of his touch spread over your body. "Why are you with him?" Lucas hand was still on your upper arm and you knew exactly what he wanted out. You would love to leave Matthew right away, but you were scared, because you were cowardly. "Because of my family…it's complicated." You try to avert the topic, but you did not want to offend Lucas either. The situation was extremely problematic for you, because you do not want to lose him. "What about your family? Let me understand! Matthew is a douchebag and I see you're scared of him, you do not deserve that." You knew it, Lucas meant it well, but suddenly you felt totally under pressure. Did the decision have to be made right now? Couldn’t he wait a little while? Anger over Matthew and your family came up in you and you did not know how to handle it. "We spend some time together and you think you know me, you know nothing about me, you can’t just get into my life and mess things up." Your breath was heavy and you puffed as you finished your sentence. And when you looked at Lucas, you discover his injured soul. With your words, you broke his heart and suddenly you see him disappear. Everything moved away from you. First his touch, then he took a step back and you see in your thoughts a life without him and you did not want that. Immediately you regret each of your words and all you only wanted was him. What did you do? “I’m sorry Lucas. I was stupid.” You try to approach him. Tears were gathering in your lower lid and your only fear was losing Lucas. You never felt like that. Previously, you were just scared of your father or Matthew, but now you were even more afraid to lose Lucas. He triggered such things in you and that made him so incredibly valuable. “No, it’s fine.” His voice was cold and he was about to turn back, but you reached for his upper arm to hold him back. You had to take back your words. You had to prove it to him that you were serious and you only wanted him. “I will break up with him. Saturday. After the game.” You look him in the eye and wait his reaction. “Saturday? Really?” His voice was soft and gentle again, as before. Your pulse dropped slowly and you have a little hope that you could make amends. “I want to be with you.” You almost did not even believe what you were saying. But your words were honest like never before. Your eyes were wide as you continued to look at him. He was so happy to hear that. He was in love with you from the beginning. He hated Matthew and he could not bear to see you with him. Your words were salvation for him and he knew that from this moment on, everything would be fine. He took your face in his hands and laid his forehead on yours. With his thumb he strokes your cheeks and you recognize a smile. Isolated tears rolled over your face, but these were tears of joy. And in that moment, he kissed you and you knew that your time has begun.

Your lips only moved up and down at first. Everything was very gentle, but when you put your palms on his chest everything became a little bit more intense. His kisses became more demanding and your bodies came closer to each other. Lucas strong body pushed you against the wall and one hand buried in your hair and the other at your waist. Your arms moved over his neck and you pull him closer to you. His kisses moved away from your mouth and they slowly went down to your neck. He was so gentle and not as rude as Matthew, who you always send away from this point. But you wanted more from Lucas, his kisses should cover every single part of your skin. You wanted him not to miss one part. You start moan and you realize that your actions made Lucas greedy for you. He grabbed you under your butt and lifted you up. Your hands clasped his shoulders tightly until he gently drops you into his bed. As you lie in his sheets and take his scent completely. Lucas bends over you and you raise your head to kiss him. You stay like that for a while, but you wanted to feel him more. So you grab your hand on his belt buckle and open it. "Wait y/n...Do you really want to do that?" Lucas took your hand and looked at you questioningly. Just that he asked you something like that made him perfect for you. Matthew has been pushing you so long that sometimes you were afraid to be alone with him. But with Lucas you feel secure. "Yes, I want to do it." You smile and try to give him back a pleasant feeling as well. "I'm...It’s my first time" he admitted. You knew these words were not easy for him to say. Which boy did like to admit that? But that was convenient for you both because you were also in an unknown situation. "Don’t worry, me too ..." You kiss him gently, put your head back and smile at him. "OK wait." Lucas jumped up, looked for something in his desk and then came back. In his hand he held an aluminium packaging. He had gotten a condom and he put it on the table next to the bed. Then he braced himself with one arm next to your face and with the other he drove over your shoulders. "I really like you very much." His words meant the world to you. Everything was so honest about him, so sensitive, even if he did not seem so from the outside at first. "I really like you, too." You lift your body a little to kiss him. His hand wanders down to your stomach and with his palm he strokes under your shirt. But his lips were still on yours. He took so much time for you, slowly taking each step. But you realize that he could not slow down much longer. His length has already pressed hard against your thigh. But even you did not want to wait much longer and you pull up his shirt. He straightens up and removes the fabric from his body. His body was incredible. His Muscles were everywhere and you could see that he was trained. With your fingertips you drive over the edge that formed on his skin, because you were so fascinated.

Lucas took you by the hand and pulled you up a bit, so you're sitting in front of him. He reached for the hem of your shirt and pulled it up. Immediately he leaned down to kiss you and tried to open the clasp of your bra. Your palms were now on his chest and you wait until he finally releases you from the last fabric on your breasts. When he finally opened the closure, he gently pulled the straps over your shoulders and released you from this garment. First, he kissed your shoulders, where the pressure points of the bra could still be seen. With his big hands he covered your breasts and slowly his kisses also went down. You let yourself fall back into the sheets, while Lucas tongue gently circled your nipples. You run your fingers through his hair and slowly he looked up at you. His eyes were big, dark and so faithful that you almost melted away. "You are so beautiful, you know that?" His voice was so soft, so gentle. He made everything perfect, you could not imagine this moment more beautiful. Now you were ready for him. You did not want to wait any longer to feel him. You reach into his middle and feel the big bump. Slowly you pull down his sweatpants. Lucas also pulled down your pants and when your middle was free, he kissed your mound. His kisses continued to move up. First he kissed your belly button, then your chest, then your neck and finally your mouth. "Are you ready?" He asked cautiously. You were a little bit nervous, but he seemed nervous too. But you were one hundred percent sure, that there was no better time for it. You nod and give him a kiss. Lucas took then the aluminium packaging from the table and unpacked the condom. He lay it carefully over his hard length and when it lay perfectly on him, he leaned over you. "I'm very careful, say, if it hurts too much, we can stop anytime." He looks at you with his big eyes and waits for a reaction. "It’s ok." You smile and try to relax. Lucas positioned his dick in front of your entrance and slowly he pushes the tip into you. You feel everything stretch in you and the feeling was more uncomfortable, but you knew that things would get better with time. Carefully he pushed himself more and more into you and there it was, the pain. Your eyes got big and you realize that everything is cramping in you. Lucas responded immediately and stopped his movement. "Should I stop?" But you shake your head: "No go on, it should be over soon." Lucas looked at you doubtfully at first, but then he kissed you and continued his act. The pain continued for a while and it was not easy for him to move on. But you try to smile and it was not long before everything was over. "Is it alright?" He asked after he was completely inside of you. "Yes, everything is perfect." You smile and put your hands on his upper arms. Lucas now began to move and slowly you feel how a pleasant feeling spread in you. He felt so good and all your muscles relaxed. At a steady pace, he moved inside you, and as you look into his face, you realize he was fighting with himself. "Cum for me," you breath and stroke your palms over his chest. For a long time, Lucas couldn’t hold himself back anyway and with a grunt he reached his climax and cum. His body fell on yours and you can feel how high his pulse was. Then he rolled off of you and pulled off the condom. "Are you alright?" He asked carefully. It was a good feeling for him, but he knew it was not so relaxing for you. But you did not want that he think that it was bad, because it was perfect for you. "I'm feeling better than good." You kiss him and snuggle closer to him. He puts his arm around you and you stay like that for a while.

It was a day before the big game and the team met one last time to train. Lucas could not wait, because it would not only be his first big game, he could also finally officially call you your girlfriend. The last days you were only with him, spent every second with each other. You had to be still careful not to let Matthew know. But he was busy with other things anyway, but sometimes he looked at you, so Lucas was not sure he did not suspect something.

After the last training, the boys met each other in the locker room again. Lucas wanted to get away from here as soon as possible. On the one hand he had a little guilty conscience about Matthew, on the other hand he knew that you were waiting for him at home. He decides to change quickly, but he also heard a conversation that he would like to forget. In the locker room, the boys began to tease each other. "Does she still don’t let you over?" Oliver laughed contemptuously, because with this statement he wanted to annoy his team captain. "The perfect moment did not seem to come for her." Matthew rolled his eyes and took a sip of his water. "Thank God you have Abigale." Oliver laughed and punched his friend on the upper arm. "Abigale, the friend of y/n?" Lucas looked at his teammates in surprise. He did not quite understand what was going on with the boys there. "She has a hot body that Matthew is allowed to climb over and over again." There were a few nasty animal sounds, but Lucas did not understand it all yet. "That means you're cheating y/n?" "Well, if she does not let me fuck her. Somewhere I have to relieve the pressure." Lucas couldn’t believe his words. It disgusts him as the boys talked about you in this way and he wondered how he could get into something like that. "But y/n's body is hot too, so you'll have to fuck her soon." "Don’t worry, it will happen sooner than she thinks." "What does that mean?" Lucas was confused and does not quite know if he should say something. Of course, he would love to beat Matthew down. And he would like to say that you are his own now and that he is never allowed to touch you. But Lucas was not stupid, he knew it was important to be silent now. "Do not worry too much about it." Matthew patted Lucas head and the boys burst out laughing. Lucas was getting more and more uncomfortable. Slowly he realized that these guys were not completely normal and his guilty conscience, that he had kissed, fucked and loved you, were fully away.

It was the day of the big game. Many people came to watch it, but you only had eyes for Lucas. You could not wait to get the whole story passed by, finally get rid of Matthew and spend your life with Lucas. How you would teach your parents that you were dating an Asian guy will keep you going for a while. Now, first of all, it was important that you solve the matter with Matthew. You were very nervous because you knew he was going to get angry. But when it's all over, you can go to Lucas. Never have you felt so happy and free. You could be yourself with him and that was a wonderful feeling. When the team from your high school won, you were relieved, so Matthews mood was at least better. When the team were celebrated, you look over to Lucas. He shines all over his face and when he sees your eyes, he shines even more. Your heart began to race because of happiness. You would like to run over to him and kiss him immediately. So much happiness spreads in you, it was incredible. But you can’t do anything. You had to stand there and wait until Matthew was finally alone.

Before everyone in the team went out for partying, the boys went in the locker room to shower. You wait in front of it and see how gradually the team members came out. Lucas promised to hold Matthew a little longer in it, so you could catch him. Your heart rate was high and you pull nervously at your cheerleading skirt. You have prepared the words to Matthew, but you are afraid that you would forget them again. After some time, the door opens and Lucas stepped out. He looked nervous too. But he came up to you and stroked your upper arm. "He's in there alone now, you can talk to him. I'll stay close." He puts his forehead on yours, but he does not dare to kiss you. "Everything okay?" His voice was gentle and encouraging. "No, but it will be like that later." You try to smile, but it was incredibly hard for you. You separate from each other and you enter the locker room.

The air was thick in the locker room. It was hot and the steam was up to the ceiling. There was a locker open and you can see the blond hair. Matthew was just zipping his pants when he saw you in the mirror. "Y/n, what are you doing?" He turns around and smiles dirty. It was that disgusting smile that your father had too and that you hated so much. You could barely move and did not speak a single word. You were stiff with fear and could barely think now. "Do you want to give me a present, something I've been waiting for a long time?" Matthew winks and walks up to you. You knew what he wanted out. He still hoped that you would give him your virginity, but that was long ago forgiven. That's when you thought of Lucas again and slowly you realize why you stood here. You took a step back and reject Matthew with your body posture. "You want to break up with me, right?" His voice became threatening and slowly you got scared. With slow steps he circled you, like an animal his prey. "Matthew, please ... I….." You try to defuse the situation a little bit, because you could already see how the veins on his forehead with anger became apparent. "It's the Asian or? You like the dog-eating slit-eye more than me?" His breath grew stronger and slowly he began to snort. You decide not to say anything, so you can’t make him any angrier. "You're acting like a holy virgin all these years and meanwhile you're fucking another guy?" "Stop it!" You try to limit the damage, but it did not quite work. Matthew grabbed you by your tricot and pulled you up to him. His face has become red and you are getting more and more scared. Tears began to ran over your face. You did not know how you would come out of his clutches. "You don’t leave me without even fucking you," he snorted and turned around so that your back was to him. You could not move. Your fear paralyzed you completely, only more tears ran down your flushed cheeks. Only when he pushed you on the bench and you came up violently, you screamed a cry of pain. It gave you the gift of talking again, if only little. "Please let me go," you begged under your tears, but Matthew was in a frenzy. It was like a rush that did not stop him. His grip was strong and you could not escape him. The more you resisted, the more it hurt. He reached between your legs and you let out another scream. "Let me go Matthew, please, I beg you." But Matthew just laughed and pulled down your panties. You couldn’t do something, then allow everything and endure this situation. It was too late, you made Matthew angry and that was your bill. You lay there, your cried and just hoping time would pass by. But before anything could happen, you heard a familiar voice. "Let her go!" Lucas screamed and dragged Matthew away from you. But Matthew dodged and gave him a punch. "That does not concern you." Matthew was angry. His head was fully red and he huffed like a bull. Meanwhile, you sit up and straighten your clothes. But you were still afraid. Afraid of Matthew that he could have done something to Lucas. Matthew slammed angrily his locker and walked toward Lucas. He pushed him against the wall. "Matthew let him go." You start screaming, but it did not help. "What did you care about y/n? Hmmm?" He grabbed Lucas by the collar and pressed him even tighter against the wall. Lucas was strong but could not get away from Matthew's grip. Lucas did not answer his question. He knew he would only provoke him. But anyway, it did not matter what he did because it was all wrong. Suddenly Matthew became calm. It was like the calm before the storm. He loosened his grip and started to smile. But that smile was not a good sign. "Ahh you fucked her really!" Everything became so incredibly calm and that scared you even more. Then Matthew turned to you and started to laugh. "You refuse me for years and you let him fuck you right away?" He looks at you disapprovingly, then he opens his mouth and spat at you: "Whore!" Now also the patience of Lucas burst. He is taking the opportunity, grabbed Matthew and slammed him against the locker. "Woe you're talking about y/n again." This time Lucas snorted and getting also red. But Matthew did nothing else but laugh. "Apparently she is good to fuck, that you care so much about here." Lucas pushed him against the locker again, so it makes a big sound. "Watch what you say ..." growls Lucas, when the door opens. It was the coach who suddenly stood in the middle of the locker room. "What's going on here?" His voice was loud and he immediately ran to the two boys. Lucas lets go of Matthew and both look surprised to their coach. "You three, Monday 9 o'clock in the directorate, and now GO!" The coach yelled in anger. You take Lucas hand and pull him out. You both run to his car and get in.

For a while you will sit in it without saying anything. "Does it hurt a lot?" You lean over to him and look at him alarmingly. Who could have guessed that it escalated so much? Lucas looked up at you and you can see his wound. This is going to be a big black eye. He tries to smile and rubs your thigh. "It's nothing, are you alright?" You kiss Lucas, stroke his cheek and smile softly: "The worst is over, so yes." "Do you want to stay with me for the night? I do not want to leave you alone." Lucas really worried about you. But you did not want to be without him anyway. Never again did you want to be without Lucas. So, you go and when you arrived at his house, you immediately went up to his room. Lucas puts you in his bed and gives you a kiss. "It's over now." He smiles and kisses you again. Yes, it was over, but the black eyes will remind you two of this moment for a while. "Should I get something to cool?" You paint over his temple and you see that all the little veins have burst. You feel bad. It's just because of you that he came into such a situation. "No, I'm going, should I bring you something?" You shake your head and Lucas went down the stairs into the kitchen. Although it was already late, the light was still on and Lucas was surprised, because his parents usually went to sleep quite early. In the kitchen his mother sat at the table with a letter in his hand. Her eyes were swollen and he heard a soft sob. His father stood behind her and stroked her on the back. Lucas was nervous and approached his parents. "Mum, Dad, what happened?" The silence in the room was unbearable. He knew something had happened. His mother looked up and saw her son's bruised face. "Lucas, what about your face?" Her face was worried and more tears rolled down her cheeks. But Lucas ignored her question and sat down with his parents. "Dad, what's going on?" His father took a deep breath and then started to talk. “They want to close our restaurant and tear it down. Y/L/N Company wants to build new apartments on this property. The mayor, who unfortunately is also the boss of the company, has approved this. We are ruined. We put all our money in it. We are bankrupt.” Lucas eyes grew big. He could not believe what he was hearing. He had to ask again. “Y/L/N Company?”

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winterverses · 6 years ago

Text

Walking Wounded - Chapter Sixty-Eight

In the morning, Anne had done exactly as she’d said-- woken up early, made a breakfast Jim and Ella could eat quickly or take along with them, set out their clothes, and called an aircar. And then she’d woken them both, helped them get ready, fussed over their hair and clothes while they snatched bites of food, and kissed them both goodbye. There was no awkwardness with Ella, for which she was extremely grateful. It would have been her fault if there had been. Making people like you was a skill, not chance at all. Mostly it had to do with being willing to suppress your own personality in favor of whatever the other person wanted to see, if you could figure out what that was. It could backfire easily, ending up in obsessive and possessive relationships, whether romantic or not.

In Ella’s case, it had been easy to see what she wanted. She was lonely, as Anne had told Jim, and on top of that she wanted someone who wouldn’t let themselves be pushed around, but who could also be affectionate. Someone who didn’t need Ella to be an authority figure, someone who would treat her with a little more delicacy and care than she was used to. Anne had barely even registered those desires consciously before she’d been letting them guide her. It was habit, not a good one, but a useful one, and one that was nearly compulsive. Hell, it had kept her alive and sane more often than any other skill she had. Jim was one of the very few people she knew that hadn’t been subjected to that habit, simply because she hadn’t been able to keep herself under control enough to make a concerted effort to go through her normal routine with him. That was one of the reasons it was so surprising that he’d wanted to stick around… and probably one of the reasons things were so good between them. She hadn’t needed to pretend anything to gain his approval and respect. She hadn’t been in any shape to do so. And by the time she had been able to keep herself together enough that she could have held up an act, she hadn’t wanted to, not even to protect herself. She was safe with him.

The only other two she could be certain she hadn’t swayed into favoring her were Claudia and Spock. And once Anne woke up from the nap she’d taken after Jim left, she’d resolved to see them both. Leaving messages for Nyota and Spock, she’d almost called Claudia to see if she had a spare hour or two to see her that day.

Almost.

Some impish impulse led her out the door instead, over to Claudia’s apartment. She had a vague idea that Claudia might be at the trials, but if so, she could always go and do something else. Visit her Russian friend’s restaurant, maybe, or go to one of the unofficial markets that sprang up in closed restaurants and warehouse buildings. As she rang Claudia’s doorbell, she considered contacting Jim to see if he had lunch free.

The door opened, and Anne’s eyes widened. “I knew it,” she said immediately, then brushed past a startled, disheveled Dr. McCoy and into Claudia’s apartment. “I told you you needed to cover your tracks better,” Anne called, walking into the kitchen to get herself some coffee.

Irritated splutters followed her down the hall. “You’ve got some nerve,” McCoy said. “What the hell gives you the--”

“Don’t be tiresome, Doctor. I needed to see my psychiatrist. Had I called first, she would have kicked you out, and that’s totally unnecessary, as I already knew what was going on.” Anne set the box she was carrying down on the counter and stopped at the synthesizer, punching in three coffees, cream and sugar on the side. “Now, I do want to talk to Claudia, and I don’t mind if you choose to sit in on it. But please be civil. I haven’t told Jim, and I’m not going to unless it comes time to get back on the ship and neither of you have done so.”

Claudia came into the room, obviously having just thrown on a nightgown, her dissatisfaction written clearly on her beautiful heart-shaped face. “This is really intrusive and not at all welcome, Anne.”

Anne paused, then continued to bring the coffee to the table. “You weren’t going to admit it if I didn’t catch you. Better we stop pretending, don’t you think?” She sat down, holding up a mug for Dr. McCoy, who took it ungraciously and sat down beside her. “Anyway, I have some things to discuss with you. First of all, I need to know which nights you’re free leading up to the end of the trials.”

“I really prefer not to see people in the evenings,” Claudia said, sitting down at the table.

“No, no. I’m trying to plan a party, and Jim’s been too busy--”

“If you got us out of bed to talk about a party, I’m going to toss you out right on your pointy little head,” McCoy growled from behind his mug.

“Doctor, please. If that was the only thing I needed to discuss, I would have just called you. But I do want to get it out of the way. Don’t answer me now, send me a message and I’ll choose a date that suits as many people as I can. It’ll be at our place, of course, and we’ll provide the food and drinks. All you have to do is show up and enjoy yourself.”

“Fat chance of that,” McCoy muttered.

“Please come,” Anne said, looking over at him and trying not to seem too much like she was begging. “I know we're not exactly friends, but Jim liked the idea and I want to do something he doesn’t normally have a chance to do. When has he ever been able to invite his friends into his home? Not the ship, where he always has to be the Captain, but his own home.”

McCoy’s glare softened, and he took a swift gulp from his mug. “I’ll think about it.”

Anne looked over at Claudia, who sighed heavily. “We’ll come. But you’d better keep your mouth shut about Leonard and I. This is not going to be a factor in ship politics-- it’s over the moment we’re back on duty.”

Anne sat back in her chair, looking thoughtfully at the two of them. “That will be hard to maintain, but I’ll trust you not to let it interfere even if it does continue.”

“It’s none of your damn business anyway,” McCoy grumbled. “You’ll be gone by then.”

“I know, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care what happens,” Anne protested.

“Which reminds me, seeing as you’re so chipper, I do have something to say to you,” McCoy said. He didn’t seem to take any pleasure in the idea. Anne fell silent, waiting. “When you leave, you’d better be gone. Make it clean. The longer you keep contacting him, the longer he’ll be thinking of you, and the longer it’ll take for him to get his mind back on his real life.” McCoy looked evenly at her, his green eyes holding hers.

Anne was frozen for a moment. She had been actively avoiding thinking about that. Flustered, she sipped her coffee and collected her thoughts. “You’re right, of course. I’ll make it as quick and clean as I can.”

“Good.” McCoy searched her face once again, his gaze snagging on her jawline. “And that jaw needs fixing. I can get you in surgery--”

“Leave it. It’s fine the way it is.” If Anne’s voice was a little sharper than she intended, she felt she could be forgiven for that. Still, she made the attempt to soften it. “It’s all right, Doctor. It’s just cosmetic, hardly noticeable. And… thank you. I didn’t realize how much you were trying to help at the time, but I do now.”

“Well that’s something, at least,” he said. “All right, now what else did you need to bring up? The quicker you finish up, the quicker I can go back to bed.”

Anne thought briefly, trying to turn her mind away from the thought of leaving Jim. That wouldn’t help anything right now. “I want your perspectives, both of you, if you don’t mind. Commodore Paris has advised us to give an interview. Damage control. The higher-ups have been privately questioning Jim's judgment, and Loche’s women have done a number on us, apparently. I wouldn’t know, I don’t read anything about this if I can help it.”

Claudia nodded. “It’s true. It’s kind of hard to tar and feather the rest of the crew for breaking up a smuggling ring, but you and Captain Kirk left yourselves open to it.”

“Idiots,” McCoy said, and for once he didn’t seem to be talking about her. “You’d think they’d have more than one brain cell to rub together among the whole lot of them, but no. They’re happy to report whatever so long as it looks like it comes from a legitimate source.” He swirled his coffee around in his mug, thinking. “Well, you can’t exactly get away from the rumors. They’ve done too good a job on you, and you two have been seen together too often to claim you only have a professional relationship. Especially that motorcycle stunt. I’d blame you for that, but I know that was all him.”

“Well, it did keep me from having to fight through the crowd,” Anne said, shrugging.

Swirling her coffee, Claudia said thoughtfully, “If this wasn’t something that would follow you around after it’s all over, I’d say play it up. They’d latch onto a whirlwind romance narrative in a second, and it would make anyone casting aspersions look malicious. But that will get awkward when the Enterprise leaves and you’re not on it.” Claudia looked over at McCoy. “We didn’t handle it very well when your first wife found us out. All those rumors she started…”

“I should have told Simone to take a hike,” McCoy said. “Her and everyone else that said anything about you. It would have been the right thing to do, even just as a friend.” He gave Claudia a lopsided, regretful grin.

“It’s all right. We were just kids.” Claudia shook her head, her grin just as bittersweet. Anne decided to say nothing; the only thing she’d known about them was that they had a ‘history’, according to Jim. She didn’t want them to feel they had to keep quiet about it. “But that might have shut some people up. And Simone wouldn’t have been able to paint me in such a terrible light if anyone had known half the shit she put you through. It would have made a bigger fuss for a little while, but it definitely would have put some of her bullshit to rest.”

Though Anne’s curiosity was piqued, she couldn’t think of a way to ask McCoy what had happened without looking like she was prying. They weren’t on good enough terms for that. “I do understand if you’d rather not talk about it in front of me. It sounds like it must have been very personal.”

“Breakups always are,” McCoy mused, swirling his coffee in his mug.

“This isn’t about our ancient history, though,” Claudia said. “Media isn’t my strong point, but… you’re the author. How do you sell the story you want?”

Anne considered this for a few moments, tapping a fingernail on the tabletop. “Detail. Verisimilitude of action. Emotional logic.” She smiled a brief, humorless smile. “But this is different. At the heart of it, I’m not asking them to believe my story is true, I’m asking them to sympathize with me.”

“So your choice of venue for this discussion has to reflect that. So does the content of your interview.” Claudia paused. “Why not invite whoever you choose into your home? Make it a relaxed, informal conversation, not a press release or a media event. Make it small, exclusive, and be clear about why you’ve stayed silent, and why you’re not interested in giving more statements. The court case will help with that. Until the trials are over, there are things you can’t talk about.”

“I need to find out the legal limit of what I can talk about,” Anne said.

McCoy had the answer for her. “Anything that’s considered hearsay is off-limits, which means anything that no reliable witnesses were present for is something you can’t talk about. But Starfleet officers are blanketly assumed to be reliable witnesses unless there’s reason to believe that their account is compromised or biased. Which means if Uhura or Scotty or I were present, you’re fine, but since Jim’s in a relationship with you, anything that only you and he witnessed is off-limits until its reliability is determined in its respective court case.”

“Why am I not surprised that you know this?” Anne asked, eyeing him skeptically.

“Because I hang around with Jim,” McCoy said, smirking. “After a while you get used to keeping the legal liabilities in mind.”

Claudia was shaking her head. “Why did I let you convince me to take this post? Well, it’ll be interesting, at least.”

McCoy scoffed. “You were bored to death. You’ll thank me once the five year mission is over.”

Claudia’s eyes lingered on Anne a moment too long. “We’ll see,” she said.

Anne didn’t need a flashing sign. Claudia didn’t want her mentioning the offer to give up her post. It was just as good a time as any to move on to her next topic. “I’ll discuss this with Jim and we’ll work something out. Thank you both, very much. Your insight is always appreciated. Now… do you have time for me, Claudia? There are some things I need your help with. I understand if you’d rather I come back later-- I couldn’t wait on asking about the interview, but this can wait if necessary.”

Claudia’s eyes rested on McCoy for a long moment before she looked back to Anne. “I’m tempted to tell you to wait just because you barged in here like that. You haven’t even apologized.”

To Anne’s surprise, McCoy laughed. “Bit of a hypocrite, aren’t you? Spend all this time trying to help her be more assertive and feel more confident, and the moment she does it in a way that you don’t like--”

“Leonard, that’s not at all what I meant and you know it,” Claudia said.

“Either way, you made this bed. Don’t complain if the sheets don’t hang right.” McCoy pushed his chair back from the table, picking up his mug.

Rolling her eyes, Claudia made a moue of exasperation. “Fine. But next time you’re calling first, Anne. I don’t appreciate this.”

“Thank you, Doctor Hayes,” Anne said, inclining her head in something like a bow. As McCoy walked away, she added, “Wait a moment. I did bring something for you. Both of you.”

McCoy paused in the doorway, watching curiously as Anne got up and took the box from the counter. Flipping it open, she set it down on the table. “There should be enough to last you a while. Jim was too busy to demolish them last night. I know you’re both from the southern states so I thought you might appreciate these.”

Eyes brightening when he saw the contents, McCoy reached in and grabbed a handful of pralines. “Been a while,” he said. “I won’t hold it against you if they’re not as good as the real thing.” Taking a big bite out of one, he thought for a moment, then nodded, appearing satisfied, and left the room.

Shaking her head, Claudia selected a praline and bit off a small piece. “Apology accepted,” she said wryly. “Now, what’s all this about?”

Sitting back down, Anne took one of the pralines and crumbled a bit into her coffee. “Hmm. Well. How do you tell whether something is a dependency, a habit, or just part of the way you relate to the world?” She'd never questioned that ingrained desire to influence people toward her ends before. Jim's presence had thrown it into sharp relief, however, and Anne found herself wondering just how deep it ran.

Claudia looked suspicious. Anne couldn’t blame her. “That’s awfully abstract. Why don’t you tell me why this is bothering you?”

Anne grimaced. “Well, it wasn’t a problem until last night…”

Between phone explosions, drama explosions, projects dying and coming back to life, and various other time commitments, I’ve not even been able to think of posting until now! Updates should resume as normal though.

#James T. Kirk/OC #Jim Kirk/OC #Star Trek #Star Trek Fanfiction #dark romance #ST:WW #Star Trek: Walking Wounded

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