#night just staring at a wall and thinking abt life events

[cheridraws]

happy late mothers day to penelope and penelope only <3

[satrs]

A/N; working on alll of ur requests rn sweeties!!! It's gonna take me a good while tho, so here is a lil sum sum I wrote abt the guys sum time ago ^^ Hope u enjoy my late night yapping and plzzzz be patient with meeee, I didn't forget ur requests my lovelys!!!

Random/unpopular headcanons of Weird stuff they do! (MDNI! SFW ans NSFW)

ZAYNE

SFW

Drink his coffee HORENDOUSLY. It looks like a brew straight out of hell. Honestly, it’s closer to motor oil than anything drinkable.

Eats like a pregnant woman with the wildest cravings. I’m convinced he mixes sweets with damn near everything, pickles with ice cream, shit like that.

Uhhh, I also think he’s messy??? Like, his house looks tidy at first glance— floors clean, dishes done, nothing crazy. But if you actually live with him, you realize he doesn’t have time to handle allat!!! There’s always clothes flying around, jackets tossed over chairs, hoodies crumpled on the couch, random socks disappearing into the void. Not necessarily dirty clothes, just... clothes littered across the house. It's like he tries to stay organized, but life moves too fast and the laundry pile moves faster.

NSFW

Tries to optimize things. It's kinda weird but also hot??? "What if we adjust the angle by 12 degrees—oh. Oh, that's better."

One time, he came with one hand on the wall like a man in mourning and didn't say a word, just stood there. (Post-nut trauma pose lmaooo)

Looses track of time when he's with u. You've been at it for 3 hours with barely any break before he realized that he has 2 hours of sleep left before he has to get up for work. But he'll worry about that in the morning.

He's giving you a clinical review when you ride him. "Your pelvic tilt just now was exceptional. Ten out of ten."

SYLUS

Bro im ngl… i feel like he's a hoarder. Antique stuff probs like old pennies from 1500s or sum shi.

Props a history nerd on the low. Knows every event ever happening around the word from the stone age to modern times. (Rants to you about them sometimes)

Caffeine Dependency, But in odddd forms.He refuses to drink normal coffee so, instead, he's obsessed with fancy stuff like matcha lattes, cold brew espresso, or even herbal teas that are supposed to enhance mental focus. If you catch him on a "bad caffeine day," you'll see him get irritated if he had to settle for a drink that doesn't meet his exacting standards (He's gonna pull out the glock ain't he).

NSFW

Discovered his wax kink one time when candle wax happend to drip on him turing sexy time, and he moaned so loud it scared you. That's when you both began to involve wax as a main actor during the act more often.

Oh he's soooo horny when you patch him up after a deal gone wrong. Grows soooo hard when you're shocked self runs up to his all bloodied form:(( Just such big baby and a suckerrr for your nursing skills!!!

Guns are everywhere. Like, casually. Sometimes there's one just sitting on the nightstand, loaded, of course— the barrel practically staring at you while he's fucking you. It's kinda terrifying if you think about it too hard.

Okay, hear me out!!!! When he's really exhausted, like dead-on-his-feet exhausted, he comes home, takes a quick, half-awake shower, then just slumps onto the bed, still wet, still half-dressed, a lit cigar hanging from his lips as you ride him. He's barely doing anything, just lying there with this lazy, heavy-lidded look, letting you use him however you want. Smoke curling up toward the ceiling, his body all warm and loose under your hands. It’s messy, raw, and honestly addicting if you admit.

CALEB

SFW

Constantly challenges himself to do backflips in inappropriate places. "Bet I can flip off this railing" No, Caleb. You can't. But he does it anyway(urghhh). It's even grown to a point that he makes a quick backflip when you two meet up as agreeting mane. It's sooo embarrassing when the bystanders eye him but he thinks it's soooo cold LMAOOO

Caleb still doesn't know how to use a lot of things properly. He'll try to fix things around the house and end up breaking them worse than they were. You'll catch him watching YouTube tutorials, struggling with the basics of cooking, or just trying to figure out how something works.

NSFW

Tries to make you laugh mid-stroke. Literally says stuff like "What would you do if I'd start moonwalking right now?" You're crying laughing while he's still inside you.

He high fives you after sex. Every damn time. Yep. Its canon bc i said so!

Treats you on top as if he's ur personal trainer. "Yeahhh, get those megan-kness working. One, two, three— heyheyhey you gotta put your legs into it!“

XAVIER

SFW

Despite him sleeping so damn much, I feel like hes a light sleeper. If you move away slightly his eyes shoot open bruh. (They also glow in the dark and scare the shit out of you when ypu come back to the room after taking a piss)

Incredible memory for faces, but not names. He can remember every single detail about a person's face—the way they looked when they smiled, the exact way they tilted their head during conversation—but when it comes to their names? Not a clue. He js couldn't give less of a fuck.

Always late for your dates. At least half an hour. Not bc he's been sleeping but because he's so slowww man! You're so mad bc you can't teleport like a certain someone cough cough, but still manage to show up on time!!! And when he shows up he acts so innocent and clueless as if you didn't wait for him for half an hour.

NSFW

Thinks it's soooo sexy when you scold him. Say his full name with force and he's rock solidddd 'm tellin youuuu!!!

Always insists on so much foreplay it's frustrating. Don't get me wrong it's sexy! ....until it's been 45 minutes and you’re still begging for him to finally put it in.

Has a thing for u playing with his hair, especially if you pull it when he's eatin you out. But even if you just genuinely move it out of his face after a heated make-out shesh, he whines as if you got his dick in a headlock (you do).

RAFAYEL

Props has a journal and draws little doodles of you next to his entry of the day!! When he's feeling espacially romantic, he'll begin with a small doodle but get lost in it end end up drawing the most breathtaking portrait of you. He hides the journal too, a bit too embarrassed to show you his rambles of how much in love he is with you. Yeahhh for his eyes only!

Rafayel is full of bizarre superstitions. He's the type to refuse to walk under a ladder, always carries a lucky charm, and insists that everything happens for a reason. If you spill salt, you're definitely going to have to throw it over your left shoulder. Was a literal sea god but bad luck are the most of his worries ig...

His desk is a mess, but somehow everything is in its right place. Papers are scattered everywhere, but you can not touch them. He has his own chaotic filing system, and God help you if you try to reorganize anything.

NSFW

Sucker for you when ur in heels. I dare you to step on his foot by accident in heels!!(he almost came in his pants). Loves to fuck you in heels from that point onwards.

Ok so this is ridiculous but I have this headcanon that you both made out in the ocean once and got so into it that you didn't notice rafayel turned into a merman until his fishtail grazed your legs and you fucking screamed for your life. He had to make it up with some sloppy toppy head underwater ofc!!!

Will literally stop mid stroke to get his sketchbook and sketch you when he has the urge to capture your beautiful form splawed out for him. Like, this is for him, like.... oh my godddd yu're so perfect???

[love-bitesx]

what would hobie do in a situation where reader, who’s a new spider person (like pavitr, like they got bitten by the spider few months ago or smth) had just went through their canon event?? whether it be what he would do after the event or during is completely up to you, im just curious and i have hobie brainrot rn LMAOAOAO

ofc if u don’t wanna do this request thats completely fine, have a good rest of ur day/night!!

hobie x gn!reader

warnings: death, family member dying, very (very) brief description of a dead body, but nothing graphic at all. hobie just wants u to be safe n happy :( he’s been through that grief and his heart hurts knowing you’re abt to go through it too :(

you couldn’t move.

your watch emitted a blaring, shrill alarm, miguel desperately trying to make contact, but you were frozen. bones aching, numb, all you could do was stare at the scene in front of you with watery eyes.

“i-,” your body betrayed you, catching your words as they try to escape, clawing at the walls of your throat as they get dragged back down into the growing pit in your stomach. falling to your knees, numb to the feeling of rubble against your bones, you picked up a slab of concrete and threw it to the side.

“uncle ben.”

it was all you could muster, voice small and hoarse, and if a mouse had squeaked at the same time, you would’ve lost in comparison. shaking hands rising to touch his face, a strangled choke broke out at the cold, lifeless skin that met your trembling fingertips. he looked strangely peaceful, sending a bolt of pain directly to your heart.

“no-no, please, uncle ben,” your thoughts unravelled, grabbing at his shirt, as if you could shake the life back into his bones, “please, i can’t do this– i can’t do this without you.”

you’d only been a “spider person” for 4 months. only 4 months of navigating the most isolating, terrifying journey with no one but your dear uncle by your side. he’d grown with you, seeing you muster from dangling off climbing frames in playgrounds as a child, to scaling buildings and saving lives. not a day went past when he wasn’t there with you, holding your hand through the unfathomable changes.

it all happened so quickly. one moment, you’re fighting an anomaly, bashing around the streets of your earth, leading the monster further away from the crowds – until it threw itself, headfirst into a neighbouring building, office blocks, you think to yourself, nothing too serious. that is, until you trap it, ready to send it back to miguel with ease, and lay eyes on the scene it left behind. people crushed under concrete, glass shattered the streets, and a familiar face unconscious on the pavement.

“y/n,” a voice sounds from behind you, but your soul is too busy trying to claw it’s way out of your chest to notice, or care. you laid on his unmoving torso, heart ripping at the vacancy of its usual heaving.

“y/n,” it sounded again, and a twang of familiarity shone its way through the darkness.

“he’s–” you sobbed, reluctantly lifting your head, “i couldn’t save him, i– it’s all my fault, hobie.”

“shh, come ‘ere,” you barely felt his arms wrapping around you, your body was numb. it’s like you were a ghost, haunting your own skin – a poltergeist in the wind.

regardless, you fell into him, gripping his leather vest until your knuckles were white. sobbing into his chest, his ringed hand came up to calm you, running it softly over the curves of your spine, voice low as he whispers into you, “it ain’t your fault, love.”

“you two, you need to get back—” miguel’s voice came booming from a growing portal, spider-people spilling into your dimension, ready to bring the anomaly home, until hobie cut him off sternly.

“fuck off, miguel,” he spat, pulling his arms tighter around you, feeling as though if he held you close enough, he could shelter you from the grief. maybe, if he kept you in his arms, he could carry the burden of your loss on his own studded shoulders. but, he knew he couldn’t, he’d been there before – they all had. all he could do was be there for you, a hand to hold and shoulder to cry on.

and so that’s exactly what he did.

“love, gonna come stay with me for a bit, yeah?” he whispered into your hair, and you nodded weakly, his heart surged, “just ‘til you feel a’ight.”

he placed a kiss – gentle, safe – to your forehead.

“i’ll look after you, darlin’.”

[peachiimilquetea]

heyyyy :) can i get an angst scenario (fem!reader) for your event, with tenya and the prompts, "fuck you for making me love you.", "i'm sorry that i was never enough" and "i just want to understand why i wasn't enough." please?

your writing is *mwah* chef's kiss <3 thank you!!!

“𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮” + tenya iida

ft. “i’m sorry that i was never enough” + “i just want to understand why i wasn’t enough”

a/n: PLS WHY DO YALL ENJOY ANGST SM IT MAKES ME SAD WHEN I WRITE IT EVSJSBSJSSN. this one was just… damn. i hope i did the prompt justice tho! check out my event here!

contains: infidelity, tenya CURSES????, fuck mc ion like her in this one, breakup, overall just a shitty time, hakagure is a real one even after graduation

length: 1.2k

a/n ii: tysm for the kind words abt my work!! 🤍

hey iida, i hope this email finds you well given the circumstances,

i’m really really sorry…

tenya’s eyes scanned over the contents of the email and he could feel his world crumbling around him as he read. he had to remember to give hakagure something for all her troubles, as he was appreciative of all her help.

he had suspected something was going on for a few months, he wasn’t stupid. he saw the way you had started leaving your phone face down and picking up “extra shifts” at your job.

he noticed the way you smiled, how hollow it looked now when he said something to you or how you tensed up whenever he touched you, almost like an aversion to his affections.

so he pulled some strings, reached out to his old classmate from high school, now one of the top heroes that specialized in stealth in the country. he asked her to tail you on the way to one of your shifts and see what she could find. all he needed was confirmation.

i’m really really sorry…

you had decided to surprise him by coming home early from work that day. the guilt of sneaking around was eating at you and you knew he was suspecting something you made the snap decision to try to throw him off your trail.

you had decided to surprise him by coming home early from work that day. the guilt of sneaking around was eating at you and you knew he was suspecting something you made the snap decision to try to throw him off your trail.

“ten ten? baby i’m home!” you called, putting your stuff down at the door and striding into the room.

“why are you home so early?” he clipped out, initial devastation turning into anger the longer he looked at your face.

“what, i cant surprise, my boyfriend, anymore?” you attempted to joke, picking up on how tense the air was becoming.

“oh now i’m your boyfriend?” he chuckled in disbelief.

“what are you talking about? you’ve always been my boyfriend, ten, we’ve been together for like a year.”

“don’t bullshit me right now, _____. how long?”

“excuse me?” your smile started to slip, hoping he was angry about something else. anything else.

tenya turned the laptop sitting next to him around and your voice caught in your throat as you tried to answer him. high definition proof sat in front of you, a testament to how little you cared anymore. the look on his face told you everything.

he knows, you thought but used all your energy to keep your face as neutral as possible, opting to play dumb.

“how long, _____? answer me.”

you stayed silent, still trying to figure out a way out, but you knew you had reached the end of the line.

“how long have you been doing this _____?”

“s-seven months,” your voice was small. you were scared and ashamed- knowing you had been stringing him along for all this time and never seeing him react to anything like this. not when his brother was attacked or when his father died.

tenya didn’t think he could feel any worse. 7 months was more than half of the time you had been together officially, meaning you had checked out of this relationship a long time ago. you had been lying the whole time. having your cake and eating it too. it made him want to scream, cry and throw up all at the same time.

“im sorry tenya… really i am, but youve been so busy with hero work and your father left you in charge of everything, i’ve just been feeling really neglected, you know?”

“and you didn’t come to tell me about it? you went outside the home, outside of us to get your needs met?”

“it wasn’t like that-”

“then what was it like?” he pressed.

“i..”

“answer me, _____, what was it like?”

“you want the truth?” he gestured for you to go ahead, “i was bored.”

everything you said after that fell on deaf ears. you were rambling, and he wasn’t even sure if you were coming up with excuses for your own sake or for his.

you cheated because you were bored- bored of him and his unwavering love, bored of the late nights you stayed up to imagine your future, and bored of the way he treated the ground you walked on like gold. he absolutely adored you, and you got bored.

tenya’s mouth felt dry as he tried to articulate exactly what he was feeling. he wanted to go for a run and let the world blur into the background as he cleared his mind. he wanted to cry, one large cathartic release of everything that had been building up for the past few weeks. but most of all, he wanted to know why.

“you... got bored of me?”

you breathed out, exasperated, “yes, tenya, god! i needed some excitement, something different. you’re always so uptight, i just wanted to let loose sometimes, it was suffocating!”

iida flinched, the truth stinging more than he anticipated it would. he didn’t even recognize the woman that was staring at him, trying to explain away the betrayal of a lifetime.

“fuck you," he spat, even surprising himself with how hostile he was.

“tenya…”

“no. fuck you for making me love you, and fuck you for not having the integrity to break up with me when you knew you didn’t want to be here anymore.”

you deflated, feeling sick to your stomach at what you had done. initially, you hadn’t meant for it to get this far, but that didn’t matter now. “i know, i’m in the wrong and i’m sorry, but i think we can make this work and-”

he raised his hand at you to stop you. he didn’t want to listen to any more of what you had to say. he wanted you out of his house and out of his life.

he wanted to make you leave, and that’s exactly what he did, helping you pack up the things the two of you had gleefully moved in 3 months prior, and kicking you out.

he told you explicitly to never contact him again, much to your anguish. you knew you fucked up but you still wanted to be selfish, you still wanted access to him in ways that you didn’t deserve.

the rest of the day didn’t feel real. tenya went ghost, turning off his phone and sitting on the couch staring at the wall, unable to sit in the bedroom he once shared with you.

he thought about the ring he had asked his mom for, the ring he had already planned to give you, and heaved out a shaky sob. it was probably burning a hole in the nightstand drawer now, never to be used for its original purpose.

his eyes scanned the room, landing on a photo of the two of you that sat on the tv stand. getting up, he walked over to it to get a closer look. such a stark contrast from the way things were now. the two of you were all smiles in the photo, faces flushed and rosy from the cold air. he ran his thumb over the frame, finger caressing your face.

“im sorry i was never enough… i just want to understand why i was never enough.”

[oftenderweapons]

Can you write a drabble about jealous taehyung with lace? Ty 🥺

So... I had to brainstorm with my dear mate abt this one since we never really saw Taehyung as someone who could be openly jealous or would even consider the feeling, since we see him as a confident person, and even more than that, we think that he and Lace are very open about trust and loyalty. We think that both of them would be happy with introducing a third party in the bedroom — not on a regular basis though. Lace is a sucker for Taehyung — and Taehyung alone; he knows it, and he also knows that he has a beautiful girlfriend who is bound to attract people’s attention and make them believe that they can flirt with her. Still, Lace gives the cold shoulder to anyone but her man.

HOWEVER

We found out a potential loophole.

Pairing: Kim Taehyung x reader (nicknamed Lace)

Wordcount: 1.5k (sorry, I got carried away)

Genre: angst/smut/fluff

Rating: 18+

TRIGGER WARNINGS: uhm, there are dirty thoughts in the middle (mild) and smut at the end (mention of oral male receiving, female receiving, rough penetration, biting). Possessive!Tae. Takes place a few weeks after Love Talk and mentions a few events in Illicit Affairs (which should — hopefully — come out soon).

As you walked down the long corridor of the small gallery, Taehyung tried not to notice — or better, not to care about — the young artist waiting by the door, walking several steps behind you.

Taehyung’s hand twitched before he shoved it in his pocket. He wanted to touch you.

Having that... that vulture staring at you... It made his stomach sour.

Maybe it was because this was your first date after having you all to himself, after knowing how you taste and how you moan, how your breasts flush when you’re about to cum, how good it feels to grip your hips while you ride him, to feel his fingers sink in the flesh of your ass.

He took his hands out of his pockets and joined them behind his back, cracking his knuckles and rolling his shoulders in an attempt to calm down.

You stopped in front of a picture, observing it for a moment. It was a hyper-realistic painting of a watermelon sculpted into a cube, placed there in the middle of the white canvas. It was truly the game of a virtuoso.

“Impressive.” You said, before turning toward the man about a metre or two away. “How long did it take?” You asked nicely, still impressed by the amount of details: the seeds, the small veins, the grainy texture of the watermelon.

“About three months.” He replied. “I had started it as a still life, but I changed my mind and redid it with a more... Surrealistic approach.” He explained.

Taehyung raised an eyebrow, trying to keep his annoyance at bait, licking his lip before biting it. “Good job.” He said, trying to be grateful even though he wanted to rip the man’s eyes away from his skull.

The only thing holding him back was that he didn’t know how you would react to that. And if you would ever love his fingers as much after seeing him perform such a crude act.

You smiled at the artist and took a few steps to the next painting, this time a basket of cherries — only barely visible from behind a lace curtain. It was alarmingly realistic, truly breathtaking in the amount of precision poured into every small thread making the see-through effect. “Wow.” You commented under your breath.

Taehyung thought about how different his style was from these pictures. Sure, they were very good and they showed great talent, but that didn’t mean that he would want one in his own house.

“I was in Greece when I made that one.” The artist explained. “Beautiful country. Have you ever been there?” He asked.

You turned, making your light summer gown twirl in the motion, exposing more of your calves and the soft skin of the inner side of the knee as the slit parted, the plump, soft flesh of your thigh still protected by the row of small buttons that ran from your belly button to your knees.

Taehyung thought you were too beautiful for this universe. Nevertheless, as he stared at you and the artist there, right in front of his face, he felt actually menaced, for the first time. Something ugly slithered around his chest, tightening and tightening as your calm, composed voice said: “No, I’ve never been to Greece. I’ve only ever visited Jeju once, and I’ve travelled to Japan a couple times but normally I don’t get the chance to travel much.” You explained, blushing.

He would take you all around the world, Taehyung thought. He would spend Christmas with you in the Alps and make love to you in Amsterdam for your birthday, and of course, he would take you to Greece, feed you grapes and cherries and damn watermelon too. He would have you in white, light clothes and take pictures of you standing by the sea, your bright, flowy skirts contrasting with the deep blue of the sea — like the one he saw in Malta. He would rent a small house away from anyone and watch you sunbathe naked, with no one interrupting him as he drew you again, and again and again, until his hand could draw you with his eyes closed. He would leave the windows always open, the long white curtains flowing in the breeze as he would wake up from his afternoon nap and wrap his naked body around yours, kissing you and rubbing against you until you were nothing but two bodies melting into each other, like an embrace could naturally slide into passionate lovemaking. He couldn’t even think about nights. Nights were something he was too weak to think about.

Lost in his musings, he didn’t even realise your visit had come to an end, the gallery empty just like it had been when you had arrived, booked for a private visit for Taehyung and you alone, for safety and viewing pleasure.

“Thank you for visiting,” the artist said, bowing to Taehyung.

“Thank you for guiding us,” Taehyung replied. “I’ll let you know if I find any of the pictures fit.”

“Of course.” The artist said, kindly.

Taehyung nodded and was ready to leave the moment he heard the artist speak again. “Excuse me, miss, I’d like to ask... I’ve been working on portraits for my new collection, and I would be extremely pleased if you would pose for me.” He said. “I don’t usually... I usually book professional models but I thought someone with your looks could be really interesting to portray.” He explained. “I can leave you... Uhm.” He rummaged in his pocket and offered you a small piece of paper. His business card. Stealing a pen from the entry table, he wrote something on it. “I’d be honoured.” He commented, offering you the card.

You raised your eyebrows and smiled. “Thank you. I can already tell you I don’t think I’ll accept.” You looked at the floor. “I don’t have much spare time and I’m a bit too uncomfortable when people stare at me.” You chuckled embarrassedly. “Plus, I don’t think my boyfriend would be very happy with it.” You said, giving him a hint.

Taehyung was furious, still he kept all his inner turmoil to himself. Until you reached the car. The moment you sat at his side on the passenger’s seat, he started the car and began driving silently.

“Are you upset?” You asked, looking at him, keeping all the enthusiasm about the exhibition to yourself. You were more than capable to divide the artist from the person behind it. He was talented, maybe a bit sleazy as a person — and a bit too flirty — but still, talented. Plus, Taehyung hadn’t made it clear that he was with you as your boyfriend.

Taehyung tutted. “No.” He replied.

“Did he make you uncomfortable?” You could feel his mood poison the air in the car like dark waves of black oil covering the surface of the sea. It reminded you of a scene from Howl’s Moving Castle, when the young, beautiful wizard gets depressed and all his house starts getting covered in green slime.

“I’m okay.”

Catching his free hand, you placed it on your thigh pulling it toward the inner side.

He couldn’t resist, his thumb immediately drawing slow, lazy circles on the smooth, tender skin.

You noticed him taking the route to his apartment. “Aren’t we going out for dinner?”

“Mh.” He noted, counting the minutes until he could claim you all to himself.

“Do I need to un-book?” You asked with a mischievous grin.

He looked at you, his mouth forming a slow, insecure smile before he nodded in reply.

The rest of the night is a fuzzy memory of his mouth hungry and his hands grabby on the lift on your way up to his apartment, the shape of him hard in your palm as you entered the door, your attempt at offering him a blowjob, already lowering yourself to one knee before he pulled you up.

“That’s generous of you but I need inside.” He growled as he walked the both of you to his bedroom.

You didn’t even remember anything of him undressing you, it was all a whirlwind of limbs until you found yourself with your legs spread open and his mouth on your clit, his fingers stretching you before he stood on his knees and grabbed a condom.

You remembered his groan as he slid inside, your walls welcoming him with their tight embrace. “Dammit Lace, love this pussy.” He spoke through gritted teeth, your hands landing on his butt and pulling him toward you, inside you, harder, faster. “That’s my pussy.” He said, ramming in. “All mine.” He said, slowing down only to get the right angle. “My girlfriend.” He said, biting your breast, and giving the most precise jabs to your g-spot, suckling your tit, tugging at it, stretching it with his mouth before letting it fall back heavy to your chest. “My nymph. All mine. Mine.” He said again, your body too tense for speaking. Your high reached you as his fingers started toying with your bundle of nerves, rubbing it furiously until both you and him were nothing but two desperate beasts fucking each other.

“I love you.” He said, as soon as he was back to planet Earth, his body heavy on top of yours, his cheek glued to your chest with a mix of drool and sweat. “Love you, my precious dove.” He said again, rubbing the outside of your leg. “My love.” He repeated as you patted his head and reassured him yourself.

“Only yours.”

[dameferre]

i also wanna know abt who am i really 👀

okay. so. ‘who am i really’ is the first zukka thing i ever wrote, started before i had even. finished watching the show lmao

basically i have 25k of it written, probably another 4-5k written in notes and an outline, but i am mature and knowledgeable of my own shortcomings enough to know there’s no way in hell i’ll ever finish it, because that 25k? isn’t even. 20% of the fic if i were to actually write it, like this shit would approach 200k in its final form and i very simply do not have the time to actually. write that lmao

but i’m happy to talk about it! so basically it was the whole ‘oh my god they were roommates’ premise except zuko is sokka’s downstairs neighbour, they fight over music volume, and for the first part of the fic zuko’s a bootlicking son of the city police chief and starting out at the police academy, who calls the cops on sokka for his music one night

aand i just realised how long this is gonna be so under the cut!

so we start from the ‘zuko’s a fucking asshole’ stage and move on from there, and then due to a couple of different mildly traumatic events  zuko realises the police system is inherently evil, has his whole redemption arc slash emotional breakdown and quits the force, he gets cut off by ozai and moves in w sokka for cheaper rent bc sokka is a nice person (who’s seen the way zuko has been walking around looking like absolute Death for weeks) and also needs someone to help w the rent

we also start from the point where sokka’s dating suki, and zuko’s still coming to terms with his sexuality, so there’s all that to work through

basically it just goes into the development of zuko and sokka’s friendship, and zuko’s development as a person going from an incredibly sheltered, incredibly privileged life to... the opposite of that lmao and how his friendship with the rest of the gaang grows, and his personal journey, and whatnot, just a nice little mirror for canon except w more swearing and the author talking about how all cops are bastards

it’s all self indulgent nonsense and little bits of shit that popped into my head so i wrote it down, really, but here’s my favourite bit

“So I was thinking.”

“Never a good sign.”

“Ha, ha.” Sokka deadpans. “Seriously though. I want a GNO. Drinking, dancing, questionable choices, might even get some action if I’m on my game.”

“And you think this is something I would enjoy.” Zuko, the introvert who can’t dance, responds.

“You’ll enjoy it because you’re going with your best friends, one of whom is just getting over the emotional hangover of the end of a three-year relationship.” Sokka pouts. “We can even go to a gay club! It’s been ages since I’ve been to one.”

Zuko snorts, and looks back to the TV. “I thought you wanted to get some ‘action’.”

“I mean, I would also be fine with just a fun night out with the gang. But if there are interested parties.” Sokka shrugs.

“Well, forgive me if my idea of a fun night isn’t watching Toph beat the shit out of you for creeping on lesbians at a gay club.”

Sokka makes an exasperated noise. “C’mon, you know me better than that.” He says, throwing a cheeto at the side of Zuko’s face. “I said interested parties. I can be strictly dick-tly for an evening, no sweat.”

Zuko turns, brow raised. “What does that even mean.”

“Y’know. I wouldn’t say no to a girl of the bipan persuasion if she wants to make a move, but if I’m actively pursuing anyone, it’ll just be guys. And, y’know, any non-girl people who seem into it.”

A record scratches in Zuko’s brain. “You… why would you pursue a guy.”

“I dunno, if he’s hot?” Sokka says, looking at him like he’s crazy. “Or has a nice smile? Shiny hair? I dunno, why do you usually pursue guys, Z.”

“But.” Zuko stammers, staring at Sokka. “But I’m attracted to men.”

Sokka blinks at him. “…so am I?”

What. “What.” No seriously, what. “What?!”

“Is this… are you trying to be funny?”

Zuko stares at his roommate, frantically trying to understand what’s going on. “Are you trying to be funny?!”

“No, I’m being bisexual.” Sokka says, slightly defensively. “Because I’m bisexual?”

“Since when?!”

Sokka stares at him, then gestures to wall. “Zuko, that’s been up since I moved in. I know you’ve seen it.”

Zuko turns to stare at the wall, but all he can see is- “The flag?”

“Yeah, Zuko, the fucking flag. Did you think I just thought it was pretty?”

“Is-” Zuko flounders. “Is the flag significant?”

Sokka looks intently, somewhat crazed, at Zuko’s face, like he’s searching for something. Whatever it is, he obviously doesn’t find it. His arm is still held out towards the wall, and he uses it to gesture towards the flag again, more aggressively this time. “It’s the fucking bisexual pride flag, Zuko!”

“I.” Zuko gapes at him, still confused. “I thought the pride flag was a rainbow?”

“Oh my-” Sokka starts. “Are you fucking with me right now. Is this you fucking with me.” He pauses, staring at Zuko. “Jesus fuck, Zuko, there are different flags for different sexualities. That’s the bisexual one.”

Zuko stares at the flag, then back at Sokka, then back at the flag. Then back at Sokka. “Well how was I supposed to know that?!”

“Everybody knows that, Zuko!” Sokka exclaims, then brings his hand up to rub at the bridge of his nose. “Okay, I guess you just. Didn’t know that. Somehow. And that’s fine. Point being, I am bisexual. I am attracted to all genders, I’ve been- I thought- out since I was sixteen. So yeah. I’m bi.”

“But.” Zuko’s brain has been trying to process this information, and now rejects it entirely. “But that. You can’t be.”

Sokka gives him a weird look. “I can’t be?” His face shifts, into something sort of… defensive. Wary, almost. “Do you have a problem with bisexuals?”

“What?” Oh shit. “No, of- of course not! I- I love bisexuals! All of the- um,” Zuko’s mind races, trying to think of a bi person he knows personally, and then frantically widening its search to any bisexual human being in all of recorded history. “Jet! Jet’s bi! Love Jet, he’s, um. Yeah! Bi.”

Sokka’s face isn’t defensive anymore, but it is shocked. And- something else, Zuko can’t quite place. “You love Jet?”

“What?”

“You just said you loved Jet.” Sokka says, sort of quietly. “I just- I guess I didn’t know you guys were at that point.”

Zuko absolutely does not love Jet. Only Jet loves Jet. But Sokka’s looking at him, lit by the artificial glow of the TV, still the most attractive thing Zuko’s ever seen. So Zuko’s self-preservation instinct kicks in. “Uh. Yeah, you know.” He swallows. “It’s still pretty new, but. Yeah.”

“Well hey, that’s.” Sokka gives a small smile. “That’s great.” He places his hands on his thighs, pushing up off the couch. “I’m just gonna text everybody, see if we can get the night planned.”

He walks away, leaving Zuko to his mental breakdown in peace.

Sokka’s bi.

Sokka.

Is bi.

[later that week or some transition i haven’t written lmao]

“Zuko, you know I’m bi, right?” Suki laughs, but the grin slides off her face when Zuko hesitates. “You know that, right.”

Zuko makes a reluctant face. “I know now…?”

“Oh my-“ Suki stares at him, then looks at Sokka who makes a face as if to say ‘see, what did I tell you’. “Ew, Zuko!” She cries. “Ew, you thought- you thought I was straight?!”

“You had a boyfriend,” Zuko defends himself weakly.

Suki looks like she wants to scream. “I’ve never been so offended in my entire life.”

“Now you know how I feel.” Sokka says.

“Me! A straight girl!” She laughs, slightly hysterical. “Me!”

“Okay, I guess I just-” Zuko starts, but Suki holds out two fingers in front of his face, shutting him up.

“No no, that’s enough from you today.” She looks, wide-eyed, at Sokka. “What do I have to do, paint the fucking bi flag on my face?”

Sokka snorts. “He wouldn’t recognise it, anyway.”

Suki turns back to glare at Zuko. “I thought we were friends, Zuko.”

and then in a perfect world this would be followed by a montage of all the times sokka has definitely been openly bisexual in front of ‘still coming to terms with his own sexuality’ zuko who’d just. wrote it off as bro culture

[lake-arrius-caverns]

Nerevarine Rising

Chapter 7: Awakening

oops im seeing about changing my upload day to friday but yesterday i totally forgot abt it so lmao

summary After a successful assignment, Fahjoth is glad to be given a few days off and learns a little about his duties from Caius. The twins plan a trip to Vivec City for some exploration.

content warnings none

tag list @boulderfall-cave , @padomaicocean (lmk if you’d like to be added!)

read under the cut or on AO3, cheers 👍

:: First :: || << Previous << || >> Next >> || :: Masterpost ::

—————————————————————————————

Flouncing through the front door of Cosades’ tiny house, Fahjoth couldn’t wipe the grin off his face as he brandished the scrolls of parchment with glee. 

“I got them!” he cried, ecstatic. “The notes from Sharn gra-Muzgob! I got them!”

Cosades looked up from his supper with one brow raised, but by no means did he look on with disapproval. “And not a scratch on you,” he remarked, holding out a hand to receive the scrolls as Fahjoth passed them over. “I knew it wouldn’t be long before you found your feet. Well done, Novice.” 

“Well, I had help—” Fahjoth started, unwilling to take all the credit for his achievement, but Cosades didn’t seem to be listening anyway. He unfurled the scrolls and silence fell as he pored over them, a thoughtful look on his face as he examined the scrawling, loopy handwriting. Fahjoth took a seat at the table and waited, wondering what his next assignment was to be. At least Ribyna was on standby back at the South Wall Cornerclub, and for that, Fahjoth was grateful. 

“Well, Fahjoth,” Cosades started, rolling up the parchments once again and turning to face Fahjoth with the beginnings of a smile, “I’m promoting you to Blades Apprentice. You deserve it after the hard work you’ve put into all your duties.” 

Fahjoth’s heart began to soar with excitement. “Apprentice?” he repeated, awestruck. “Thank you, sir! So, uhh... what will I be expected to do now?” 

“Nothing too different, I assure you. It’s mostly a recognition thing, to be perfectly honest,” Cosades answered. He got to his feet, beginning to pace around the room in deep thought and occasionally stopping to check a book or scrap of paper, cross referencing several stacks of notes. Fahjoth wondered how he was able to keep track of it all. “Now, I'd like some time to think how this all fits in with the Emperor's plans for you. So if you'd like to get in a little freelance adventuring, go ahead. But whenever you're ready, I'll have new orders for you."

“Oh... alright.” The news came as a welcome surprise for sure. Fahjoth had to admit, he was glad to have a few days of downtime at last. It would be a good opportunity for him and Ribyna to do some exploring; she had mentioned wanting to visit Vivec City at some point, perhaps now they could finally go. 

But there was one thing that he had been growing more and more curious about; the subject of all his errands, the very reason he had been putting his life on the line in exchange for whatever information Cosades wanted. He knew nothing about any of it, and the burning desire to ask, to learn exactly why it was so important, could not be quashed. Maybe now was the time. 

“Sir?” he questioned, biting his lip with uncertainty. Cosades stared fixedly at Fahjoth, indicating that he was listening, and so Fahjoth continued — albeit with some hesitation. “Could you explain the... things that I’ve been getting information about? The, uh, the Sixth House and the Nev... Nevera... Neraver—“

“The Nerevarine,” Cosades finished for him, and Fahjoth nodded. “Of course. I forget that you can’t read well. We’ll start with the Sixth House.” 

Fahjoth shuffled in his seat, getting himself comfortable and listening with rapt attention as Cosades began to speak. “There isn’t much to say about the Sixth House cult just yet. A trusted informant of mine says they're a secret cult associated with some strange events recently. More importantly, my informant thinks these recent disturbances are related in some way to the Nerevarine Prophecies."

“And what are the—?”

“I’m getting to that part, Apprentice. One thing at a time. I’m not sure if you’re aware, but there’s been some attacks recently attributed to sleeper agents of this cult. Have you heard anything about them?”

Fahjoth shook his head. “No sir.” 

“There've been several attacks recently, and these Sleepers all say the same thing. ‘Serve your Lord, Dagoth Ur. The Sixth House is risen, and Dagoth is its glory.’”

A shiver suddenly tore through Fahjoth’s ribs, catching him by surprise. Why did that name sound so familiar? There was no distinct emotional response attached to hearing it, but the hairs on Fahjoth’s arms continued to stand on end, giving him prominent goosebumps. 

“Keep an eye out, and if you see anything suspicious, let me know.” 

“Yes sir.” 

“Alright, now for the Nerevarine.” Cosades rejoined Fahjoth at the table and took a swig of something from an open bottle before continuing. “The Ashlanders—“ 

“The what?”

“The Ashlanders— by the divines, Vetharys...”

Fahjoth grimaced, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. “Sorry...”

“No, it’s alright,” Cosades sighed. “I just thought you would’ve heard about them by now. I don't know much about them. Most people say they‘re murderous savages. But most people are idiots. I know they hate the settled Dunmer almost as much as they hate Westerners. I don't think their tribes tend to be particularly welcoming to outlanders, so watch yourself if you’re ever wandering in the Ashlands.” 

Fahjoth nodded, remaining quiet to let Cosades go on. 

“The Ashlanders pass down their customs and history in the form of poetic verses. Among the things they preserve in verse are the dreams and prophetic visions of their wise women, in particular the verses that foretell the coming of the Nerevarine. And before you ask,” Cosades added, seeing that Fahjoth was about to speak again, “some Dunmer believe that an orphan and outcast, a youth born on a certain day to uncertain parents, will one day unite all the tribes of the Dunmer, drive out the invaders of Morrowind, and reestablish the ancient laws and customs of the Dark Elven nations. They call this orphan and outcast the ‘Nerevarine’, and say they will be a reincarnation of the long-dead Dunmer General and First Councilor, Lord Indoril Nerevar. But... I don't know much else about it. That's why I'm sending you to find out.” 

Fahjoth nodded, fascinated by the sudden bombardment of information he was receiving. “And... it’s relevant to stuff that’s happening now? These cult attacks and whatnot? That’s why we’re investigating it?”

There was a split second where Fahjoth thought that Cosades may have paused, his stern grey eyes locked on Fahjoth’s own, but then came a perfectly normal response, leaving him wondering if he’d simply imagined it. 

“Correct.” 

Armed with this knowledge, Fahjoth suddenly felt inspired. So this was what all his top-secret missions had really been about. He still had no idea why he’d been pulled out of prison to join this endeavour specifically, but he no longer felt as much of a need to question it. This was his chance to make a difference, to do some real good in the world; it strengthened his resolve and he silently vowed to give it his all, regardless of how many errands he would end up having to run. 

“Alright. Thanks, sir.” Fahjoth rose to his feet, figuring he should go and find Ribyna and tell her the news, but Cosades leaned back in his chair and stared at him with such a dour look in his eyes that Fahjoth faltered.

“Don’t forget, Vetharys — always pay attention to what’s going on around you. You’re an agent of the Blades; information is our specialty,” he advised. “And never let your guard down. I don’t ever want to find you being sent back to me in a box.” 

Fahjoth cringed, feeling distinctly like he was being told off for the sheer amount of ignorance he had so openly displayed. Well, he had to learn somehow, didn't he? “Yes, sir… thank you, sir.” 

And with that he bade farewell to Cosades for now, scurrying out of the house before he could be admonished further, and made a beeline straight for the South Wall Cornerclub. Just as he rounded the corner and descended the short flight of stone steps between buildings, he found himself face-to-face with a familiar dark-haired figure, and coincidentally just the person he was looking for. 

“Ribyna!” he called, grinning as he got his sibling’s attention seconds before she stepped into the cornerclub. “Thought I’d find you here.”

“‘Sup, Fahji?” Ribyna turned away from the doorway and gave Fahjoth the usual hug of greeting. “You look happy. Has something happened?”

“I got a promotion!” he exclaimed without hesitation, eager to share the news. “And I got a few days off, too. I was thinking maybe we could do something.”

“Ah, well done, bro!” Ribyna congratulated him with a grin. “Yeah, I’m good for a few days. What did you have in mind?”

“Well, I thought maybe we could go to Vivec City? If you still wanted to go there, that is.”

For the second time that night, Fahjoth thought he detected a fleeting look of hesitation on the face of someone he was speaking to. This time it was Ribyna, who appeared almost apprehensive as soon as Fahjoth had mentioned going to Vivec City; but then her response was as casual as ever, leaving Fahjoth even more befuddled and debating with himself over whether he was just seeing things.

Maybe I’m just tired, he mused to himself. 

“Yeah, sounds good. D’you wanna leave now or tomorrow?” Ribyna asked. “If you like, I can go see how much the silt strider bloke charges.”

“Well, it’s getting on a bit, but…” Fahjoth paused, looking upwards and searching for the position of the sun, which was already past its highest point in the sky. He estimated that they had a few hours of daylight left, so ignoring the little voice of caution in his head, he made his decision. 

“Yeah, why not? Let’s go tonight. Could be fun to stay overnight in the big city!” Fahjoth enthused, and Ribyna nodded. 

“Alright! I’ll go find out how much a one way trip costs,” Ribyna said. “Start heading over towards the silt strider and I’ll meet you there!” And with that she tore off, racing over the bridge in the middle of town and zipping up the stairs to speak with the caravaner. 

With a quiet chuckle, Fahjoth shook his head and began to meander at a far more relaxed pace after his twin, passing by one of the townsfolk as he stepped off the bridge. He dipped his head and smiled in casual greeting, but the Dunmer gripped his wrist with such force that Fahjoth gasped in shock. 

He leaned in, his face mere inches from Fahjoth’s own, and Fahjoth could see only too clearly his strangely blank, vacant expression. His eyes, though unfocused, were glaring at Fahjoth with such a scorching intensity that he almost broke out into a sweat, his heart hammering rhythmically in his chest like a trapped sparrow, fast and fearful. 

And then he spoke, his voice gravelly and harsh, the sound of crumbling charcoal over burning ashes. 

“Beneath Red Mountain, Lord Dagoth sleeps. But when he wakes, we all shall rise, and the dust will blow away. Serve your Lord, Dagoth Ur. The Sixth House is risen, and Dagoth is its glory.”

Momentarily frozen, Fahjoth’s senses eventually returned to him and his first instinct was to yank his wrist free of the Dunmer’s grip, panting as if he had just run a marathon. The Dunmer jerked as Fahjoth tore free, and then within seconds, the blank look on his face melted away and he cleared his throat, glancing around as if confused. He then regarded Fahjoth with a perfectly normal, albeit rather sleepy stare. 

“What do you think of our city, outlander?” he asked mildly, but before Fahjoth could even think of a response, a voice calling his name caught his attention. 

“Fahji! C’mon, hurry up!”

His mouth dry, Fahjoth wheeled around and dashed after Ribyna, not stopping until he had caught up with his twin. Ribyna looked irate as she immediately began a short rant. 

“I’m not paying for that bloody silt strider. It’s a ripoff! And if we’re gonna stay in Vivec overnight, gods know how much the rooms are gonna set us back, too. Come on, we’ll walk instead—” She paused and frowned as she finally took in Fahjoth’s appearance, while he tried to calm himself down in the meantime. 

“What the fuck’s the matter with you? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” With a shake of her head, Ribyna corrected herself, “Actually, you weren’t even this pale when we did see a ghost. Did something happen?”

“A— a Dunmer,” Fahjoth began, his gaze rapidly flicking from left to right, half-expecting an attack to come out of nowhere. “A Dunmer stopped me and... and said a thing...” 

However, as he took in Ribyna’s attentive expression, he realised with a heart-wrenching disappointment that there was no way he would be able to explain any of it to her. Not without going into detail about the missions that Cosades had given him, which he had been strictly forbidden to do. He could lie, omit some elements of the truth, but then what would be the point in that? His voice trailed off into silence, leaving him awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. After a few seconds, Ribyna spoke up again. 

“Did he threaten you?” she asked, very seriously. “D’you want me to find this bastard and have a word?”

“No!” Fahjoth replied hastily. With reluctance, he took a deep breath and tried to swallow his anxieties, his gaze wandering down to his wrist as he rubbed it. There was no visible blemish, but somehow, he felt his wrist burning fiercely where the Dunmer had grabbed him. “It’s fine. It was probably nothing. Let’s just go to Vivec,” he added, “I could do with the walk, I think.”

It was clear from her expression that Ribyna didn’t believe him, but his tone of voice made it very clear that to question him further would only exacerbate the issue, and Ribyna relented. “Alright,” she said eventually. “But if you’ve got a problem, you can talk to me, okay?” 

“Yeah... I know. Thanks, Beebs.” Though he wanted nothing more than to confide in his twin, Fahjoth regretfully held back. He was alive, and that was the main thing; telling Cosades could wait until he got back. In his shaken state, he found it far too overwhelming to think about right now anyway, and so the two departed from Balmora and embarked on the considerable journey southwards to Vivec City.

[sunflowerhae]

Omfg the story of us is one of my fav Taylor songs so can you write that with mark 🥺🥺 thank youuuuuu

|📣 ▹▹ brooo it’s one of my favorite too 😩😩 I hope u enjoy! 💕🌙 ok tbh I don’t really like the ending so sorry abt that😔😔

Send in your music requests! ✨👼🏻

“I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us How we met and the sparks flew instantly And people would say, "they're the lucky ones’”

“Jesus you two are so lucky” Yeji couldn’t keep her comments in as you turned away from Marks retreating frame and to the green-eyed girl sitting in front of you at the library desk you two were currently occupying. Late night study sessions for the upcoming college exams called for loyal boyfriends to bring coffee from the campus starbucks for you and your best friend, effortlessly gaining brownie points with you.

“What do you mean we’re lucky?” You snickered as you handed her coffee to her and immediately sucked in your own cold, bitter sweet; feeling the coffee practically revive your body.

Yeji sighed with an elongated eye roll to express her clear annoyance at your confusion. “Y/n, everyone knows you and Mark are the cutest couple on campus. I mean you two met at what, a frat party?-“

“-yeah” you mumbled.

“-Yeah, and you two immediately clicked. I mean your two year anniversary is coming up, right? I won’t be surprised if you two are telling your children how you met in 10 years.” She laughed at the end of her sentence as you gasped and balled up an empty piece of paper in front of you; throwing it at her giggling and arm-protected frame as you whisper yelled,

“Yeji - shut up!” The light pink hue undoubtedly covered your face and ears at her claims as you both went back to the notes in front of you. Yeji - quickly forgetting the conversation - started complaining about the riparian plants of the San Joaquin (“-like we’re not even at the San Joaquin-“) but your mind was too preoccupied with the previous conversation, and a smile slowly etched it’s way onto your face as her words settled deep into your heart -

Unfortunately setting you up for heartbreak.

“Oh, a simple complication Miscommunications lead to fall out So many things that I wish you knew So many walls up I can't break through”

“Well you were supposed to come over and help me pack!” You couldn’t help your voice from failing you and slightly raising in accusation and anger, and you cringed at the annoyance of your tone. You could hear Mark sigh on the other side of the receiver - even over the sounds that occupied his side of the call.

“Y/n, I know, I’m sorry. I thought you meant later. I didn’t know you needed the help right now.” You wanted to ask him to come over now; to drop whatever commitment he was already at and come be with you like he said he would, but the idea of stressing him more than the situation already is, you’re sure, left a twisted feeling in your stomach, and a metallic taste in your mouth. And, with yet another sigh - maybe the 40th one through out this entire, 6 minute call - you told him that it wasn’t a big deal and he could make it up to you later. You both mumbled your I love you’s before he hung up first - leaving you in complete silence.

Your heart burned at the thought of yet another conversation passed where you refused to let out the feelings that were too overgrown for the space of your chest. There was so much you wanted to say to Mark; so much that you wished he knew. Usually, you wouldn’t hesitate to tell him how you feel - but lately the conversations seemed strained and overworked, and you had reserved yourself to the insecure thoughts that maybe Mark didn’t want to hear how you felt, and maybe it was best for your relationship if you kept them in.

You spaced out your gaze as you looked around your almost empty dorm room. It was the end of your junior year of college, and you and Mark were supposed to be packing up your room. Mark, however, forgot about it and chose to instead spend his time hanging out with his frat brothers (like he always did).

No. You slapped the side of your head and shook it back and forth while trying to get rid of the jealous thoughts. It’s okay. It’s not that deep. You’re fine.

To distract yourself, you shot Yeji a text to come help you with your room. At this, your thoughts wandered back to that late night in the school library, and your frown deepened.

You’re fine. We’re fine.

“Now I'm standing alone In a crowded room And we're not speaking and I'm dying to know Is it killing you like it's killing me yeah I don't know what to say since the twist of fate When it all broke down and the story of us Looks a lot like a tragedy now”

The music blasting through the speakers of the party was giving you nothing short of a migraine, and the unknown, red alcohol in your cup was doing nothing to soothe it. In your defense, it’s not like you wanted to be here. You would have preferred to be back in your new apartment, unpacking your boxes with a romcom playing, a candle burning, and your new cat, Ivy, cuddled up on the couch. Yet, when Yeji all but bullied you through text to come to the first party of your last year of college, you didn’t have much of a choice other than to attend. You hoped that maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as your mind was playing it up to be, this thought being reinforced by your best friend. The minute you walked through the doors of the quite familiar frat house, however, you instantly regretted ever showing your face in these hallowed halls.

You knew almost everyone in this room, yet also felt like you knew no one. Lately, that was a pretty normal feeling for you. You had spent the majority of your college experience being friends with the people that partied all around you; getting to know them at events not so different than this one. Yet, you - ever the shy one - wouldn’t have even known them, if it weren’t for a certain person that occupied the majority of your thoughts. The very same person standing across the room from you, playing beer pong with his fellow frat members.

This summer had not been kind to you.

Your uncertainties about your relationship with Mark bled into the summer heat, and were reinforced by the distance you two shared. Calls became far too in between, and texts were sporadic and short; usually just quick check-ins and awkward hellos and goodbyes.

Those were all okay for you. Well, they weren’t okay, but they were better than nothing; better than not having him.

The climax of the summer, however, came mid July, when you called and he did not answer. This wasn’t a new thing, so you left it. Yet when you called him a second, third, and fourth time (in the span of 24 hours) and he never answered, never texted you, never even acknowledged you, you knew something was wrong. You didn’t want to be the annoying one in the relationship (always so insecure), so you left it once more.

For a week.

A week had gone by without so much as a two letter word between each other. Deep in your heart, you knew the relationship was over at that point. But how could one admit that they had lost the love of their life so easily? So finally, after three weeks of no contact, you texted him a four letter message that hopefully explained everything you felt.

So this is it?

Mark responded.

I think so.

That summer was recorded as one of the hottest since 1946, but you never noticed. Your tears kept you cold.

“See me nervously pulling at my clothes And trying to look busy And you're doing your best to avoid me I'm starting to think one day I'll tell the story of us How I was losing my mind when I saw you here But you held your pride like you should have held me”

If you could cross the room and pull Mark into your hold and hug and kiss him like you two never even broke up, you would do it at as fast as the speed of sound. But Mark didn’t want you anymore, he made that clear. He was laughing at something Haechan said, and he looked beautiful; you felt idiotic for staring. You prayed he - or anyone else, for that matter - didn’t notice you there, but after shooting a text to Yeji that you were leaving, and looking back up at him for the last time, you were surprised to see that he was already looking at you. His eyes were rounded larger than usual, and even from your corner across the room, you could see the shock in them at your presence.

Time stopped as you two stared at each other, before you finally let out a small cough and looked down at your shirt to “fix” it, while Mark quickly looked anywhere but you. Satisfied with whatever you were trying to do with your clothes, you looked at Mark’s awkward figure one last time through your eyelashes, before turning and walking out of the party. When Mark looked back to where he last saw you, you weren’t there anymore, and his heart became hyperaware of the ever present twinge of pain that seemed to constantly be there, whether he numbed it out or not.

To be clear, Mark isn’t too sure why he broke up with you. While he still was deeply in love with you, you and him didn’t seem to be on the same page anymore, and that was enough reason for him to leave you. He wished he could hold you, hug you, love you like he used to. But every time you came to his head, the cringe at the way you two ended things quickly followed, and he’s too embarrassed to even think about talking to you again.

With a sigh, Mark turned back to his friends, and spent the rest of the night trying to drink away the memory of your face across the room.

“The battle's in your hands now But I would lay my armor down If you'd say you'd rather love than fight”

The insistent knocking on your apartments door at 3am scared more than annoyed you, and you couldn’t help yourself from grabbing the bat next to your bed before slowly making your way towards the door. You had 911 on speed dial in one hand and your bat in the other. It was moments like this that made you especially miss Mark, because lord knows you couldn’t fight back if someone tried to break in (not like you wouldn’t try).

Trying to distract yourself from the fear, you thought back to the party a month earlier, and your terrified thoughts had you thinking ‘if this is how I die, I’m going to regret never talking to Mark again’ as you arrived at your door.

You slowly lifted yourself to your peep hole, and let out a gasp at who you saw on the other side. You quickly placed your bat on the ground and your phone on the counter by your door, and opened the door wide.

“Mar-“ you didn’t get far before Mark took one huge step towards you, cupped your cheeks with his hands, and smashed his lips onto yours. You both stumbled into your home before mark pushed the door closed and spun you both, slightly pushing you against the door. After about 45 seconds of intense making out, Mark broke away and placed his forehead on your own.

“Hi,” you giggled out, to which Mark laughed himself.

“Hi.”

[berylliumliumite]

Cigarettes

Word Count: 2506

Characters: Cali

Summary: Cali thinks abt being alone after they leave the team. Tw for cigarettes, self harm at the end, and thoughts of being alone/ self hate

Cali splashed water on their face for the tenth time in two minutes, stopping their pacing around the grimy bar bathroom to stare at themselves in the mirror. It was not the best light- that they could admit- and the mirror made it difficult to tell whether the dirt was on their face or just in the reflection. Frowning, Cali cupped some water in their hands and threw it at the mirror, backing off and beginning their pacing once again.

They had never gone to this bar, only heard that it didn’t care who you were. They also knew that it had a lockable gender-neutral bathroom. When they had thrown the door open and stomped in- golden blood dripping from their nose, muddy and crying- not one patron had glanced their way. It was dark and dusty, and almost completely empty for early morning. All good signs. Now they’d locked themselves in a dirty bar bathroom for an hour or so now.

They stopped their pacing to stare at their reflection in the mirror. It was a bit cleaner- foggy and uncertain in the way water dripping down on mirrors without proper cleaning makes them cloud up.

Cali looked like they were about to fall over.

Despite having washed their face, arms, and whatnot multiple times, there were still signs of tears streaking down their cheeks. Their right eye was swelling up just slightly and the scratch on their cheek which had been welling up with blood just 30 minutes ago was now starting to scab over, leaving a golden scar in its place. Same with the one on their neck. Dark strands of hair fell limply over their face. As they gripped the dirty sink, their arms shook weakly. They looked... tired. And sorry.

Cali tried to hold back another round of tears, sniffling pathetically at their reflection. They were sorry. Looking down at their hands, they realized they were clutching the stone sink like it was a lifeline. Quickly, they backed off and into the opposite wall, sliding down the concrete wall and swiping at the tears that threatened to overflow.

They weren’t going to be able to get the dirt and blood off their clothes, so they’d have to find something else to wear. It would be easier to focus on finding new clothes than to focus on the events that had happened just hours earlier, anyway.

Turning their attention to their gloves lying limp on the edge of the sink, they pulled themselves to their feet to pick the gloves up and throw them in the trash nestled in the corner. No use for them now. Under the gloves lay the bandages they were using to cover their arms with. No use for those, either.

Staring back into the mirror, Cali jumped as someone knocked. Not getting this bathroom yet, sorry, they thought, turning back to the mirror and ignoring the whispered swears they heard slipping under the locked door as whoever knocked wandered away.

Slowly they pushed the disordered strands of hair out of their face, not bothering to redo their ponytail, just flipping what remained of it over their shoulder. Cupping more water in their hands, they started to sip out of their makeshift cup before spitting it out. It tasted like dirt, but they had no money, no chances, and they’d probably cry again later. Self-care measures? Taken.

Figured it’d be now you’re thinking correctly, the idiot side of their brain began. Glaring at their reflection, Cali shook their head slightly, deciding not to go down that path. It wouldn’t be good today. Survival first. Self-hate and pity later. Shaking the last of the water off of their hands, they started to prepare to leave the bathroom. Hopefully, no one would stare. It was probably late morning, and no one cares if you’re covered in golden blood in the morning. Right?

Swinging the door open and curling their hands into fists, they willed their stone mask of a face to come back. Cali learned early on it was easy to intimidate people- no matter how young you were- and then they wouldn’t ask questions. So as they strolled through the bar, it was both a relief and a smug fact that no one cared to look at them.

Spotting a drunken shadow snoring in the corner of the room by the door, Cali examined their chances to steal the red coat hanging off his seat. No one would really notice, they figured, sliding up to snatch the coat. Making a quick exit and throwing it over their shoulder, they realized it smelled like cigarettes. Gross.

The bartender didn’t even look up when Cali left, too preoccupied washing the bar of mix-matched and rusty metal. It was kind of sad, the little joint with one bathroom and small windows, filled with the smell of beer and people who wanted to forget about living in the clouds. It was perfect to hide out in for an hour though- and to steal a coat that smelled like smoke.

As they strolled on the street silently, they were on alert. The bar lay on the bottom level of the city- which was poorly constructed and greasy. It was one of the few places the Angels didn’t know well enough to track anyone down quickly. It was almost always deserted in alleyways, and always dark at midday, laying in the shadows of the sham city towering above them. Cali was certain that no one would be walking about- it was common sense to stick to the main streets down here, but they could manage themselves in a fight. The Angels didn’t exactly know the streets like Cali did, so they just had to wait to find a crack in the wall, slip into it, and sleep. They’d figure out what to do when night came.

Slipping the worn coat on as they walked, they jingled around the pockets. A few coins, a lighter, four cigarettes and a fortune cookie paper that said ‘Trust in your friends, for they are the family you choose.’

Twisting their face into a sneer, Cali ripped the paper up and threw it to the side, watching the scraps of fortune be brushed away by the wind before shoving their hands back in the pockets and walking the opposite direction, taking another alleyway to get away from the fortune’s grip.

Finally, as they strolled down an alleyway, they spotted a broken metal piece falling off the wall, revealing a tiny open space. Boxes were stacked up around it, and to a less experienced walker, the hole wouldn’t even be there. To Cali, however, it was a jackpot.

Crouching down, they pushed the boxes aside and slid into the hole. It wasn’t very big, but it was big enough to lie down in, so it was good enough. The metal screeched as Cali pushed it back and they winced, pulling themselves all the way in. Sticking one hand out, they clumsily pulled the boxes back to the entrance, so it wouldn’t be as obvious someone was rooming there.

Curling up into themselves, they sighed. The area smelled like rust and they did not look forward to the back pain they’d wake up with tomorrow. Not that glamorous, but it’d do. Beat sleeping wherever Carrie was right now.

Carrie.

Their throat choked up and they turned swiftly, facing away from the metal opening and staring at the stone dark.

What if he was safe and Cali was just an idiot? Again?

Cali didn’t realize they fell asleep until they heard the whispers of a night sweeper team from where they were laying. Groggy from sleep, they pulled themselves up to face the opening and waited until the team left before emerging from their hiding spot. Pushing the metal aside and tumbling out of their hiding spot, they landed elbows first on stone and wooden boxes, swearing quietly under their breath.

It was night again; now it was time to move.

Forcing themselves to stand and stretching themselves out- painfully, as their spine did not appreciate the position they had chosen to sleep in- they began to look for anywhere else to lay low until morning. Try to come up with a plan before they starved. Survive.

As they walked, they figured they could just steal some food from the outer ring’s marketplace. Maybe get some cheap work sweeping a store or cleaning some fruit. Wash a few dishes so they didn’t have to rob already poor shopkeepers of their stock. If Cali had been at a richer inner ring, this wouldn’t have mattered, but with how tattered they looked right now and how much they didn’t want to get caught by the Angels, it mattered a lot. Maybe they were just scared of being found again.

It occurred to them that’d be their life until they could get out of this two-faced city. Laying low, hungry, cold. Working to pay off debts or struggling for a meal. More scared than before. Alone.

Cali felt water on their cheeks and turned to the sky to look for the storm. It was clear out- where was the water coming from? And it occurred to them that they were crying. Shit.

Quickly wiping the tears off their cheeks, they decided they’d find someplace high to look at the stars. It’d make them feel better- feeling higher than the elites in the final ring of the city always made them feel a burst of satisfaction.

Walking steadily faster and ignoring the tears that were coming down easier now, Cali scanned the buildings for any handholds to help them climb. As they kept turning corners, the shadows of the city grew larger and larger, stars blurring more and more as they began to run across stone, trying to keep down sobs. Finally spotting a low-hanging roof and a couple of fallen over boxes, they sprinted towards them instead, climbing up the boxes and landing on the metal roof loudly.

Swearing quietly to themselves, they scanned the brick wall and saw a ladder hanging down from the building next door. Taking a running jump, Cali pushed themselves off the roof and onto the ladder, wincing as they grabbed cold metal. Scrambling up quickly and onto the rooftop, they scanned for any taller buildings. As soon as they chose the highest one they could see, they formulated a route to get there. From there on it was easy- switching from rooftop to rooftop a few times to get to higher places, climbing over pipes and fans until they reached as high as they wanted to go.

Exhausted, the walked across the roof silently and sat themselves down at the edge, turning their attention to the sky. The stars looked spread out in the sky, winking in and out of existence. That was a perk, Cali supposed, of living in a cloud-filled city. The stars were always brighter in the cold air. Shivering slightly, they pulled the jacket closer to themselves and tucked their legs inside of it. Warm lights from building tall out of desperation shone, and a fan blew in the background. It was peaceful. Cali smiled.

Now all they had to do was wait for Carrie to find them.

It took a minute before they realized Carrie wouldn’t be finding them. Carrie was probably gone now, along with all of their team. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Suddenly, Cali couldn’t stop sobbing. It was gross and gasping and quiet. It didn’t disturb the night. The sky blurred as they glanced away from the stars and they pulled their legs tighter to their body, shaking.

They could still hear the way Carrie asked them to please, please stay. How they couldn’t keep running away. The way they heard their name yelled as Cali turned around and started to run.

They could hear how they’d yelled at him. It was just the two of them; how couldn’t he understand? How couldn’t he realize that they weren’t ready for a family again? They’d be trapped if he left. He had a chance to escape. Cali had left him.

If they were trapped, they would’ve been trapped together.

Idiot.

Their hands searched through the thick red pockets, grabbing a cigarette and lighter from where they’d been hiding since Cali stole the coat. Shaking, Cali stared at them both, laying in the palm of their hand, before grabbing the lighter and starting the flame. It seemed almost hesitant to burn at first, but soon the lighter was a beacon of light. With an equally unsteady hand, they held up the cigarette and watched it start to glow.

They had plenty of bad habits. What was another one in the long run?

Slowly, they put the lighter down and held the glowing cigarette in their hand, not wanting to use it yet.

Why had they run? Cali knew that answer.

Logically: the Angels were coming. They knew where they both lived. Going back to tell the team would’ve gotten them caught anyway.

Technically: they were afraid.

Cali watched the embers of the cigarette dancing down the side of the building, ignoring how the gross sobbing was gone, replaced with a steady flow of tears. They shouldn’t waste the cigarette. Cali brought it to their lips, choking on the foul smoke as they pulled it away. Gods, how did people live on this stuff?

They were afraid. Sitting on the rooftop, smoking their first cigarette, Cali realized this: they were still afraid.

Why did they run away?

Carrie was the only thing that’d kept them going all these years. Even when they felt like giving up. Carrie was just the half to their whole, the one they could rely on when things got dark, the one they could talk too when it started to seem like socializing presented a barrier between Cali and anyone else. Explaining why they flinched when doors slammed was hard. Telling people who believed the house they left was a paradise became a burden.

Talking was a barrier Cali couldn’t break for the life of them. So when talking began to get hard, they stopped. They started fighting instead.

Cali glared down at the moving lights below. There was a four-person sweeper team miles below, laughing at something Cali couldn’t hear. The cigarette in their hand glowed sweetly, asking for another taste, as a rain of gleaming embers fell into the city below.

They pressed the still-lit cigarette out on their hand, ignoring the burn as the embers died down. Silently, their lips pressed together, they wiped the last of the tears from their eyes. Turning from the scene below, they emptied their pockets of the three cigarettes left, discarding them and the burnt-out one on the roof they were standing on. Standing up, Cali tucked the lighter back into their pocket.

Cigarettes sucked, and they had enough of the stars.

Maybe they’d try to get some money tomorrow. Dust off their pickpocket skills.

They only have to provide for themselves now.

[faunusrights]

a small instance

just a little fic. ive seen/read a lot of instances in fic n stuff where velvet lets coco/friends make little jokes abt her heritage, but sometimes its just a little too much to bear.

Weiss knows better than to make even the most lighthearted Faunus jokes around Velvet.

Scratch that; she knows better than to make any sort of Faunus jokes around any Faunus at all, because it’s really not her place. Even though she’s dating Velvet, she understands that it’ll always be a step too far. Blake will shrug off nicknames like kitty-cat as easily as water off a raincoat, accept the pointed references to catnaps with a roll of their eyes, but Velvet’s… well, Velvet has less of a fuse and more of a pin, never a warning and more a sudden explosion. Which is fair. She’s always said her losing an ear is something she’s over, but Weiss knows better, can see the way she gets distinctly nervous at night. Can see how sometimes people move too fast and she flinches away.

She may be built like a brick wall, every inch of her curved with muscle, but fear is more insidious an attack. No amount of brute force can ever really defend her when the hurt comes from inside your own head.

Still, the point remains that Velvet hates any reference of her being a Faunus as some sort of cheap joke. She’s too prickly for it, and where she might make the odd sly pun towards Blake or another Faunus, every human who has ever attempted has been met with a violent boiling-over.

That’s why Weiss is sat on the sofa in the living room, listening to Velvet who’s locked in a call on her Scroll and giving Coco Adel the biggest dressing-down of her life. If it wasn’t so serious an event Weiss might find it somewhat amusing to hear Velvet’s friend be knocked down a few pegs, but then Velvet snarls in an ugly way and Weiss shrinks into herself.

“No- no, do not apologise to me. You know you’ve fucked up, you know you have-”

There’s a pause, a distant voice stammering out something in reply, and Velvet’s whole body tenses.

“It. Is. Not. Funny! Fuck off, I have to deal with enough fucking dickwads saying the same shit to me when I go outside to put out my fucking trash, Coco!”

The situation is as follows: Velvet was out with Coco and Fox and Yatsu, as ever, because she might be dating a couple of first years but they were the first group of friends Velvet made here at Beacon. Velvet’s lamented the way groups tend to drift apart when shit comes up and things get between people, but ‘CFVY’ (as was named by Coco herself) has stuck together. People always thought they got along like a house on fire, and they do. But sometimes someone fucks up and in this case Coco couldn’t help herself when they all went to nab a quick lunch and when asked what Velvet would like, Coco had made an upbeat joke about that carrot cake is looking real juicy, huh, Velv?, accompanied by a wink and a nudge.

Weiss has gathered from the call that Coco had meant it entirely as a jest between good friends, but Velvet had come home seething. Well, not at first, that is. Initially she’d been stiff with tension and oddly quiet, until she’d cursed out a colourful display of an old, tribal language and grabbed her Scroll. The call that followed is how Weiss gathered pretty much all of the context, and now she’s just watching it play out sentence by gritted sentence, the little room of their student home filled with a tension so taut it may as well have been a knifeblade pushed to the very edge of breaking in two.

“I am mad!” The ways the words crack makes a cool chill run down Weiss’s spine, because that only happens when Velvet’s really riled, every word trembling with emotion. “I am angry! And don’t fucking- don’t tell me I can’t be, because you know I’ve always hated that shit! You know that!”

There’s a long pause, and then Velvet leans over a touch to press against Weiss. She sniffs and it’s snotty, so Weiss reaches over to put an arm across wide shoulders as best she can. Coco’s voice tapers off on the other end, and Velvet sniffs again before the smallest choke of a sob escapes her and she covers her eyes. It hurts to see.

“I- I get this shit all the time and I can’t- I can’t handle my friends doing it too. I’m not an animal; I’m a real goddamn person!”

Distantly a voice says ‘I know that!’ before it fades off, and Velvet waits for almost ten seconds before she snaps again. “Then please just- I don’t care if you apologise. Thank you, but I’d rather you just- don’t do it again.”

Another moment passes. “Alright.” And another. “Okay. Bye.”

The Scroll goes dark against Velvet’s cheek and she pulls it away, staring at the greased screen blankly. Weiss squeezes Velvet’s shoulder in a gesture she hopes is vaguely comforting, and it causes a mumble of acknowledgement. She doesn’t really know what to say in this situation, especially since Velvet is very clearly not okay, but she musters up the confidence to try and offer something.

“I’m… sorry that happened, Velvet.” The words feel too formalised, her upbringing betraying her, and she winces internally.

But Velvet simply sighs, and then nods. “I’m already regretting saying all of that.”

“Don’t. You’re right to be frustrated.”

There’s no response to that, Velvet tossing the Scroll onto the coffee table with a sharp clack of glass on wood, and she drops her head into her hands. Weiss isn’t sure if she’s crying or just trying to collect her thoughts, and then she barks out a short, sharp, “fuck!”

Weiss thinks it sums everything up very neatly, really.

[simkjrs]

msa ch3 asks

Anonymous said: I love how msa Izuku comes across as an honest to god cryptid: can't see his face, absolutely the kind of person you'd find at a gas station at 3 am, doesn't want attention, most likely distant cousins with Mothman

msa au is just me fulfilling all of my ‘protagonist is a cryptid’ dreams by making msa izuku as cryptid as possible. favorite character archetype: cryptid 

Anonymous said: so the msa au is my life right now thank u for that & I just read through the update twice so thank you for that x2 and I had to go back and look for Izuku and Kirishima's deal when it came up again and realized oh hey Kirishima agreed not to try and stop Izuku from leaving after 3 minutes and they didn't put a time limit on that i wonder if that'll come up again (& then my brain jumped to Izuku using that Forever. "we had a deal" every time it comes up. he cannot be stopped bc kiri promised)

got it in one!! izuku will abuse the wording of that deal forever if he can. good eye! 

Anonymous said: relatability of msa izuku: trying, doesnt trust feds, inability to sleep, ready to jump out 4th story window at a moments notice, anti-attention-

that’s msa izuku living the cryptid life of his dreams

Anonymous said: So wait you don't have to answer this if it's a spoiler but the collarbone blood tattoo™ is what's making deku's existence confusing to electronics, maybe?

yep, you got it! normally izuku is able to keep his presence from overtly affecting the electronics around him but scripting really starts messing with them. 

Anonymous said: quirkless msa deku anon and can i just say that deku looking eraserhead straight in the eye with lie detector policeman there and him saying "i don't have a quirk" and said policeman not detecting a lie is arguably the best thing i have thought of today.

tsukauchi:  tsukauchi: wh  tsukuachi: how did you even do all of [gestures at ch2 events] that without a quirk?  izuku: it’s a special talent of mine.

Anonymous said: I just read chapter 3 and oh my god oh my god oh my god. Your Izuku is who i aspire to be 24:7. Like everything he says makes me want to cry and laugh at the same time. You did good. <3

haha we are all aspiring to izuku’s levels of impromptu sass. im glad you liked the new chapter! 

Anonymous said: I'm probs rlly late cuz I Love in GMT+1 which means 9 HOURS of difference but I love your writing. Man, dude, being from beyond time and space, you always manage to create the perfect harmony between comedy and suspense that has you giggling while trying to figure out the mysteries of the universe. Just. OH BOI.

this ask is so funny and sweet at the same time. i love you 

@arinrowan said: it's kind of ironic that msa!izuku is exactly the kind of person who would benefit from friendship with/interacting with canon izuku.

msa izuku would benefit from friendship in general but you’re right. he needs the kind of quiet but aggressive support that canon izuku gives 

Anonymous said: Cuz I'm trying to see if I can figure this out, by "told me about Kamino Ward", does that mean that Izuku tipped kirishima that that was where bakugou was? How did he know tho, did baku's spirit go to him and tell him that? Did izuku actually play a part in the rescue???? So many questions

THE ANSWER TO ALL OF THESE... [spoiler alert] is actually ‘yes.’ more soon...

Anonymous said: when they start asking questions abt kamino ward at some point he just gets fed up and says "I JUST DID IT BECAUSE THE GODDAMN CAT WOULDNT LEAVE ME ALONE. I DONT EVEN LIKE BAKUGOU" and the heroes are like :0? what if, we brought bakugou here?

izuku doesn’t even acknowledge that the kamino ward incident happens it’s like theyre just talking to a brick wall 

Anonymous said: Izuku has no control over his own sass anymore and it's glorious?? Says "that'll be 500 yen" and looks surprised at himslef, says "now it's 600 yen" and looks downright mortified, the sass is too much for his smol body, sassmaster izuku ftw

to quote @salvainterra, “i love the fact that izuku never stops even when he himself thinks he should stop.” izuku listens to every nonviolent intrusive thought that crosses his mind and it both incredible and unfortunate. izuku is no longer bound by human limits 

Anonymous said: msa izuku is the living embodiment of the "fuck this shit im out" song

ABSOLUTELY

Anonymous said: tbh when msa chapter 3 said that izuku slept 12 hours at nighteye's office, i was guessing that he would just passive aggressively sleep as much as possible for as long as they had him. won't give them the satisfaction of watching him wander around in his holding cell. hes in the middle of the interrogation and he puts his head down and goes to sleep (btw love your work!)

haha no he was just so exhausted he passed out for 12 hours. he hasn’t had a good nights sleep in weeks, as soon as all [gestures at ch2] this was over he just crashed 

Anonymous said: Wow the new chapter is great!! Stellar as always. I can't help but imagine what's going on from Izuku's point of view with the spirits. Am I the only one who thinks Aizawa's spirit was trying to apologize or something when Izuku talked about not being forced into anything?

there was definitely some spirit stuff happening... i will say that aizawa’s fox spirit is the one who asked/persuaded izuku to tell aizawa what was Up with his quirk 

Anonymous said: tbh i want to see them question izuku with a lie-detector quirk or something. like he'll say something positively ridiculous and everyone's gonna go "wait wtf he's telling the truth??!!?!!?!?!?!?"

hoho... well... buddy im not gonna say anything... 

Anonymous said: Hello! I found your works recently and have an insane amount of time in the past few days going through it all, cause is all beautiful. I want to scream at you about all of them but you only get so many words with this so I'll focus on msa rn and I read chapter 3 of msa last night and since then I've been switching laughing at Izuku's sass, crying cause Izuku has so much angst involved him and I just wanna hug him, and screaming cause whAT WAS THAT CLIFFHANGER?!! Just what. Thanks for ur works-A

THANKS, thats the kind of reaction i aim for when i write something. im super happy you liked it!! <3 

Anonymous said: Technically his quirk is "Being alive" or "Having a functioning body" but saying that would probably end with the same blank stares. As a side note, in the manga (and canon in general) they mentioned quirks are activated by the 'quirk factor energy' or whatever... Do you think that might mean that people who are quirkless just don't naturally have enough quirk energy to activate their latent quirks? it would also make some sense from an evolutionary standpoint, the glowing baby is from the first

generation that had enough of the qfe to actually manifest their quirk and after that generation the lowering number of quirkless could be attributed to those that have a deficit in the production of said energy and they might actually have latent quirks. The pinky toe missing could be the final mutation that causes them to have enough energy for their quirks to work.. The only issue with the theory I see is OFA not awakening latent quirks with it's energy jumpstart...

i think that’s a pretty good theory! it lines up pretty well w/ the worldbuilding in msa. as for afo, :3c

Anonymous said: Hey uh.. I know this is probably 100% non canon in your AU but I was re-reading your MSA fic and I misread something that made me think that Izuku is actually dead and his body is actually being run by his guardian spirit who possessed his body/took his place when he died... *sweats* Its a really weird.. dark idea but I thought it was sorta cool and you might like it..? um.. I'll just let myself out now

god yeah that would be so dark and everything in msa would actually be even worse than it was before 

Anonymous said: When deku explains nighteye's quirk i can only think of that's so raven.

theyre valid questions... 

Anonymous said: I spent my break reading the asks sent to you RE: chapter 3 of msa and I cannot stop fucking laughing over "look eraserhead dead in the eyes and tell him you don't have a quirk" thank GOD I'm supposed to be happy and smiley to everyone

honestly, this is conceptually such a powerful moment that i can’t not put it in the fic now 

Anonymous said: msa izuka finally get set free but kiri has started following him around. States its official hero business but really just wants to see what other "cool shit" izuka will do.

izuku pulls an Official Cryptid Move (tm) and disappears while walking thru a liminal space 

Anonymous said: i love that when aizawa starts asking about deku's quirk he's like, 'screw this i'm answering in riddles now'. this is such a great fic!!

Anonymous said: “It’s a secret,” he says. “A secret that no one knows, that one will suffer, and one-half loathes. Who knows if it’s true or not? The only thing we can confidently say is that it’s one thing that should not be.” Okay, so this is probably one of my favourite little scenes from your fic, partially because it sounds so ominous and badass and makes pretty much no sense. I loved your update, I was so tense the entire time I was reading it, but also giggling hysterically because /Izuku/ just - Izukus

hmm i sure do wonder where izuku got that riddle from... and what it means... 

this riddle is just izuku complaining about everything because as long as he’s in this situation, he might as well make it perfectly clear how unhappy he is about EVERYTHING. when else is he going to have an audience for him complaining about his various maladies 

Anonymous said: I think that a part thats particularly true to izuku's character is when kirishima makes the observation "damn maybe it IS good we arrested him so he can sleep" & izuku goes into a miniature coma for 12 hours bc being arrested presented the perfect opportunity for him to finally be able to sleep

nfdfsljndslfnjdf YEAH, everyone please stop this child it’s for his own good 

Anonymous said: Reading know what i've made by the marks on my hands is really terrifying when not in Izuku's pov because you now know how scary?? it is for some other characters and Izuku looks crazy-- but you know he's not because cheesus???? This kid???????? Honestly I love it so much, thanks for your amazing writing and I want you to know that I enjoy it a LOT.

that’s the goal... showing how weird and strange and bizarre izuku is from everyone else’s point of view... i loved the outside pov bc i got the chance to show how much of a cryptid izuku is, something that izuku himself isn’t even aware of and thus would not make it into his pov

Anonymous said: anon who ((still)) hasn't read bnha here. chapter 3 of msa is amazing. i cannot get over the sheer amount of sass found in such a smol boy. also kirishima is quickly becoming my favorite character because of how supportive and caring he is. kirishima/deku is apparently now something to add to my armada of ships. for that i thank you. also i cannot wait for deku to meet spirit!one for all. it will either be glorious or horrible.

haha im always happy to introduce someone to the wonders of kiri/deku!! its an extremely good friendship... and in my professional opinion everyone should get on it and make it the Hot New Thing. as for ofa, ;3c

Anonymous said: I just thought of this but during Aizawa's interrogation I could totally see his spirit just blatantly looking away from Izuku while Aizawa is asking about his benefactor.

HAHA YUP, i love izuku saying all kinds of stuff about spirits and no one can make any sense of it and meanwhile the spirits are trying to tell him to stop. but izuku cannot and will not be stopped from passive aggressively vaguing about them. he WILL get his complaints in if its the last thing he does 

Anonymous said: “I just fixed your entire Quirk, you cabbage.” I'm sorry but this. This is beautiful. I'M GOING TO GO AROUND CALLING PEOPLE CABBAGE NOW

i was worried it was a bit of an overused classic internet insult but this is reassuring :p 

Anonymous said: every word that comes out of MSA Izuku's mouth is a blessing

but not to our three heroes and their intrepid intern sidekick... 

Anonymous said: Shit after the msa chapter i've got so many questions about Kamino. Did the rescue occur the same with minor variations? Is AfO still down? Did All Might fckin die? Has OfA been passed down yet? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS

im uncreative and unoriginal with canon events so we’ll see.... we’ll see. 

Anonymous said: MSA CHAPTER 4! I just found it today and I'm already rereading it. I did not know how much I needed sassy dead inside izuku. I Love this fic so much! That cliff hanger was so good! I'm so exciting to see more of izuku's pov. I love kiri but like I can't get enough of this izuku and his thoughts and reactions to things. This is so well written. The pacing in chapter 2 was so good. It felt like a heist and then keeping the readers guessing with not knowing if he was gonna get away was so good!

thank you so much!! im really glad you enjoyed the story that much <3 <3 sassy izuku is a pleasure to write honestly, can’t wait to see him more in future chapters 

Anonymous said: Ohhhhhh you should update msa! It's so unbelievably good! I love the interaction between kirishima and izuku! Like I'm so excited to learn more about kamino ward and how that's gonna affect izuku going free and keeping his identy safe

:3c 

Anonymous said: In chalter 2 of the msa au, did Kirishima think anything about how Deku said "I swear to every spirit I know"?

he dismissed it as a kind of weird, niche turn of phrase. like oh, guess this guy believes in spirits and junk, but im more worried about literally every other weird thing he’s done today 

Anonymous said: So does MSA!Izuku always mess with attempts to record his presence? I feel like this would be kind of a major problem when it comes to getting himself a school ID or the like. (He's going to school somewhere, so he must have a school ID stashed somewhere). You know, they could potentially use this to track his identity down. They can try contacting schools to see if any had issues with one student needing to have an excessive number of photo retakes.

nope, usually izuku can keep it under control! the blood sigil on his collarbone is what really let him passively affect the electronics.

Anonymous said: Ok so msa!Izuku says "he shouldn't" exists, and when I first read that I was really confused, do you mean he shouldn't exist in the way that he sees things he shouldn't, or that he literally should not exists and Inko has no freaking clue where he came from/he was not a planned child?

yes to the first proposal. other than that, spoilers... 

[athcnvs]

aLLL of them

Send “✆” for a MORNING text.

[ 11:57 ] ➝ graham: my eyes are aren’t fully open yet but good mornign my dearest[ 11:58 ] ➝ graham: is it still morning i think it’s still morning why is my csreen so brgih t[ 11:58 ] ➝ graham: yes just in time im up before noon are u proud of me????[ 11:59 ] ➝ graham: say ur proud of me ://

Send “” for a text that WASN’T SENT. 

[ UNSENT ] ➝ graham: hey if i wasnt so hung up over brandon during high school, do you think we would have dated? idk why i’m thinking about this now bc it’s so long ago, but do you think? i probably misunderstood and you probably didn’t have feelings for me back then, but i can’t help thinking about the possibility that you did. in retrospect, you really did care about me a lot, even way back when. i can’t believe that i took you for granted. i know i’ve apologized for it several times, but i had no idea how good i had it. i feel like i took you for granted more than i apologized for it and then teagan happened and i dont know. i didn’t have the right to be jealous, so why was i??? why do i have to keep building up walls?? why can’t i give anyone a chance??? i’m so stupid i should have let you in from the start. fuck brandon, i hate him. why am i so dumb??? why am i writing this why do i think this would even make a difference?? maybe i should take ur advice from before and give up on what’s never going to happen bc ur my best friend and i cant let anything or anyone change that

Send “☎” for a RUSHED text. 

[ 15:31 ] ➝ graham: my phone is at 1% but pls remind me to tell u abt my day bc i was hit on by a cute boy and i feel very conflicted atm im omw back soon lov u

Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.

[ 01:12 ] ➝ graham: ui have a sueqtion[ 01:12 ] ➝ graham: do yoyu caer about me ?[ 01:13 ] ➝ graham: like hkonestly?[ 01:14 ] ➝ graham: i know dyou say you do btu are you telgling thbe trtuh[ 01:14 ] ➝ graham: pim afraid that one day youre goign tto stop caring about me[ 01:14 ] ➝ graham: i love you pso much i dont want to eewvr lose you[ 01:15 ] ➝ graham:im afraid of aour friendship being ruuined [ 01:15 ] ➝ graham:evertiyhngs a mess but i lvoe u

Send “✿” for a SUGGESTIVE text. 

[ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: yea sure just give me a sex[ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: OMG THAT WAS A TYPO[ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: WHY CAN’T WE UNDO TEXTS IT’S 2017 [ 18:22 ] ➝ graham: I’M SO SORRY PLS DO NOT BRING THIS UP

Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.

[ 04:34 ] ➝ graham: u up? i can’t sleep[ 04:34 ] ➝ graham: i’ve just been staring at the ceiling… thinking[ 04:34 ] ➝ graham: my first instinct was to text u about it[ 04:39 ] ➝ graham: ur probably asleep nvm

Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text.

[ 02/23/13, 22:35 ] ➝ graham: ok can u pls stop telling me that i should just give up on brandon????? like holy shit graham[ 02/23/13, 22:35 ] ➝ graham: i get that you’re trying to look out for me but i can handle things on my own u kno[ 02/23/13, 22:37 ] ➝ graham: if i want to go out and get my heart broken at least let me learn my lesson[ 02/23/13, 22:40 ] ➝ graham: i really don’t mean to be confrontational with u because you’ve always been so kind to me, but trust me on this ok???? just…. let me try to fix this bc i really care about him and i’m getting tired of everyone telling me that he’s not worth it bc he means a lot to me and since u kno how i’ve felt abt him u should respect my decision to go through with this and take my chances[ 02/23/13, 22:41 ] ➝ graham: i just dont want to give up on someone that mattered so easily and i’m going to hope that he still hasn’t given up on me

Send “#” for a RANDOM text.

[ 02:05 ] ➝ graham: did u kno that the pillsbury doughboy’s real name is…[ 02:06 ] ➝ graham: poppin’ fresh[ 02:06 ] ➝ graham: i mean i guess their products should be poppin’ after they’re fresh out of the oven… they should give him sunglasses

Send “@” for a SCARED text.

[ 23:11 ] ➝ graham: i see people who are so passionate abt their craft and i keep thinking that i’ve made a mistake in my life and that i should have found a way to move forward with music even though my parents would probably yell at me forever??? i mean computer science is cool and all and people make a lot of money but is that really what i want in life??? i guess there are cs jobs in entertainment but i guess it’s not exactly what i was thinking of. but at the same time maybe i’m not a good enough musician to do anything with it.[ 23:16 ] ➝ graham: i guess my youtube channel is good enough for now but what does it matter if i’m not happy in the end u kno???? o well…. que sera que sera i guess i’m gonna go back to transcribing this tab

Send “&” for a LOVING text.

[ 23:16 ] ➝ graham: hey saw these scans from a book called soppy online and it’s so cute??? some of them made me think of us[ 23:17 ] ➝ graham: hold on lemme send[ 23:21 ] ➝ graham: [ attachment ][ 23:21 ] ➝ graham: [ attachment ][ 23:21 ] ➝ graham: [ attachment ][ 23:22 ] ➝ graham: that last one is when im playing overwatch

Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.

[ 12:42 ] ➝ graham: what is ur stance on matching hoodies??[ 12:42 ] ➝ graham: i’m not planning on buying any or anything i was just asking for a friend who saw something online[ 12:43 ] ➝ graham: the colors are the inverse of each other and i think they look cool

Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.

[ 14:23 ] ➝ graham: GRAHAM GRAHAM HARHAFAMRA HRRAHAM GHRAM[ 14:23 ] ➝ graham: IM SCREAMING CAN U HEAR ME[ 14:23 ] ➝ graham: I’M ABT TO HIT 100K ON MY CHANNEL HOLY MOLY[ 14:24 ] ➝ graham: LET’S GO OUT AND CELEBRATE WHEN I DO

Send “$” for an ACCIDENTAL text.

[ 13:52 ] ➝ graham: https://youtu.be/58-jcJupBug[ 13:52 ] ➝ graham: oh my god that’s not the video i wanted to send u[ 13:52 ] ➝ graham: i… have no idea how that got in my clipboard  

Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text. 

[ UNSENT ] ➝ graham: sometimes i ask myself how the events of my life led me to this point. sometimes i wonder how different things would have been if slowly distanced myself from you. or if i found some reason to hate you. there were so many instances where i could have vanished from your life. would you have noticed if i did?? sometimes i think about how my life would probably be less complicated and messy if i wasn’t your best friend. if i didn’t love you so much. but here i am, and here i will forever be. i wish i could give myself the closure i need, but it’s been four years and i still don’t know where i stand or how i feel about you. four. years. i just hope that i don’t mess things up for the both of us. in the end, it’s the two of us against the world. wow ok that sounded dramatic athena what are you doing[ 03:04 ] ➝ graham: i can’t believe i’m really out here tearing up to the ost of a kdrama at 3 o clock in the morning… who am i??

[sunflowerhae]

She plays bass with jaehyun pls!! Also your music taste is *chefs kiss*

| 📣 > > ty! I quite like my music taste as well🥳😌 follow my spotify if u wanna see my playlists lmao (( @coolangelgwen - lowkey hate myself for this one but no regrets, right?!? )) I tried to make a more realistic conversation style, but idk how I feel abt it. Lemme know! Also~~ last thing, I promise - this isn’t proofread lol so sorry if it’s bad

Send in your own requests! 🧚🏻‍♀️🐮

“Hey, won't you call me back? ‘Cause I've been waiting for a text back. It hurts my brain - This chick who plays bass”

“Jesus Jaehyun, simp much?” Jaehyun reluctantly drew his line of sight from the unlit screen of his phone to the eyes of his best friend.

“What? No, what do you mean?” Johnny rolled his eyes and glanced around the coffee shop the two currently sat in, not focusing his attention on anything specific, before returning his gaze back on the hopeless romantic in front of him.

“I know you’re waiting for her to text you.” At the ~truthful~ words thrown across the table in humor, Jaehyun rolled his own eyes with a “psh” - trying to play off the fact that Johnny was unfortunately right.

“Her” was in fact Y/l/n Y/n, a girl he met at the NCT party that his frat held the previous night. Jaehyun didn’t usually enjoy or attend them, but he had a feeling (some unknown feeling) that he should maybe go to this one, so he found a calming spot in a corner, hunkered down with a beer and a bowl of chips, and prayed that the party would end soon. Friends came by and talked to him, girls came by to seduce him, but Jaehyun’s ass stayed firmly cushioned on his seat in that little, calming corner.

The corner just so happened to be near the food table, so people were coming and going; you were not privy to this fact. You - much like Jaehyun - didn’t usually attend these events. It wasn’t that you had anything against them, you just felt there were better ways to spend your nights. However, Haechan - your best friend - practically begged you to come, stating that,

“it’d be nice to have at least one other cool person there!” And when the younger boy used his pouting charms on you, you found yourself agreeing to his request.

It was lame, though. Haechan had been stuck like glue to you the whole night, prancing you around to his frat brothers and with the obnoxious, “see - I told you she was real!”, he enjoyed seeing the fire of joy ignite in his brothers eyes the more they got to know you. Haechan claimed it was because you were quite known on campus for being the cool, quiet skater girl with good fashion, and everyone who had a conversation with you came out better because of it. You would just respond that he was the Leslie to your Ann (which he would just laugh at, joking that he has scrapbooks of your friendship - thus scaring you more). What was lame, was the party. There was no reason or organization, which you didn’t really care about, you just hated the amount of people, thus lessening the amount of air flow. One glance at the food table that had basically no one by it, and you were telling hyuck you were going to get food and heading that way.

When Jaehyun first saw you, his mind immediately registered who you were. Y/n. The girl that skated through campus, and had dyed hair, and always had butterfly clips in. He had always wanted to meet you, but was never courageous enough to act on it. It was funny, girls practically killed for a conversation with him, yet the one girl he actually wanted, never even looked his way.

That was until now.

You turned your body out to the crowd and glanced around; eyes landing on the little, calming corner, and on the boy who was already looking straight at you. You knew him. Jaehyun. A lot of people liked him, but you specifically knew him as a member of this frat.

“Hi!” You smiled, and he looked surprised that you were even talking to him.

“Hey,” he waved back, “y/n, right?”

You moved closer to him, “yeah, Jaehyun, right? You know Haechan.”

“Oh, yeah I do. You know Haechan?”

“He’s my best friend.” You both nodded at this, but Jaehyun looked a bit surprised.

“Wow, how do you know Haechan? Aren’t you older?”

“I mean, yeah. How do you know I’m older?” You had a playful tone, which calmed Jaehyun’s nerves a bit.

“Oh, we have a class together. Environmental Impact on Civilization with Professor Cilinado?” Your eyes went wide, and even with the strobe lights going off, Jaehyun could see the blush that projected itself onto your cheeks.

“Shit, that’s right. Hi!” You both laughed, “um, I don’t know, Haechan just kind of came up to me once and started talking like we’ve known each other for years and I went along with it, and I guess the rest is history.” The memory of meeting your best friend made a smile cross onto your face, and Jaehyun couldn’t help but think you were beautiful.

“Yeah, that seems like him. Weird I’ve never met you, though.”

“Yeah, I don’t really come to this stuff.”

“Same, what do you like to do?”

“Um..listen to music, I like to play my bass, skate, I guess.”

“Wow, you play bass?” Jaehyun’s eyes went wide in surprise, and you laughed at his taken aback expression.

“Yeah, why, do I seem like someone who wouldn’t?” Jaehyun felt idiotic for once more saying something insensitive, but you, again, had a smile on your face.

“No! Yes? I’m not sure, it’s just always cool to hear that someone plays an instrument. And the bass is so cool.”

You start to respond, but turn your head instead at the sound of Haechan calling your name. “Well, can’t keep the devil waiting. Speaking of, if you want you can get my number from Haechan, text me!” Jaehyun eagerly nods, but you’re already walking away; your back turned around.

Johnny has to literally snap his fingers in front of Jaehyuns face to shake him from the memory of last night, and the moment Jaehyun saw Johnnys amused face, he knew he was caught.

“What’d I say - simp.”

“She plays bass, she plays bass. Nothing matters 'cause we're both in space”

Y/n (4:57pm) hey Jaehyun! I’m happy u texted me! Yesssss let’s totally do something together!! What did u have in mind??

And that’s how you and Jaehyun - basically strangers - ended up on the hood of his car at 1 am; eating chicken nuggets from McDonald’s and looking at the stars together.

“Everyone knows the buffalo sauce is the best, Jaehyun!” He laughed at your counter argument, but shook his head none the less.

“No, honey mustard is superior!”

“No, because you could get that anywhere-“

“-you could get buffalo anywhere! And why is it orange, and why does it taste the way it does?” You were both laughing in between arguing your respective sides, and if it weren’t for the slightly uncomfortable position of laying on the hood of a car, this moment would have been picture perfect (but really, it was anyway).

You were thankful that the college you went to wasn’t directly in the city, so when Jaehyun picked you up and drove to a good star gazing place, it was easy to see the night sky.

“Sometimes, I like to close my eyes and imagine I’m floating in space. It feels kind of trippy.” Jaehyun turned his head at the sound of your voice, but you continued staring at the sky.

“How do you do that?” He asked.

“Well, I have to be in a completely dark and silent room. Then, I just unfocus my gaze and I don’t move my body at all. It’s how people become, uh..Jesus what’s the word? When they get like, controlled?-“

“-hypnotized?”

“Yeah! I watched a video where he hypnotized the crowd and the viewers to see their past life - it was crazy.” Through out your small speech, you waved your hands a lot, and Jaehyun took notice of the fact that you spoke with your hands; it was something small, but he tucked it into the back of his head, and kept it to think about for when he needed to smile.

“What was your past life?”

“I lived at an old korean palace - like 19th century. I wasn’t a high position, but I was wealthy. I wore red a lot.”

“Send me the link?” You finally turned to lock eyes with Jaehyun.

“Yes, of course.” You both smiled at each. Nothing was said, but both of you could practically feel yourselves making room for each other in your hearts, the longer you sat on the hood of Jaehyun’s car; staring at the stars.

“How I wish we could just date - So you can teach me how to be more like you”

Jaehyun could feel himself fidgeting slightly while he waited for you to open the door to your apartment. After gazing at the stars, you offered him a tour of your place and a beer or two, and Jaehyun didn’t admit it, but he didn’t care if you said you wanted to kill someone - he would have agreed if it meant spending more time with you.

“Sorry it’s kind of a mess! I was going to clean it on Wed...” your voice continued going, but the farther you walked away, the less Jaehyun heard it, so he just chose to instead look around the main area of your apartment, and what he found left him in awe.

A black bass sat snugly in the corner of your living room, surrounded by plants. Behind your couch framed, vintage movie posters decorated the wall, and fairy lights, records, and books sat on the shelf above your tv.

You came out of the kitchen with a wine bottle and two glasses, and you sat them down on the coffee table while Jaehyun took a seat on your couch. “I like your apartment.”

You looked back at him with a smile while pouring yourselves drinks, and sat down next to him while laughing, “thanks. Like I said, it’s kind of messy,” you paused to take a drink, “But it’s home. Bleh, wine makes me feel old.” Jaehyun nodded while laughing, and the air became thick with quietness, which teetered between awkward and calm leniently. Jaehyun - as slyly as he could - stared at your side profile while you started talking about the movie posters hanging behind you. You had an aura of chill vibes, and it seemed that whatever you talked about, you managed to make interesting. Jaehyun was debating whether he wanted to date you, or be you, until he came to the conclusion that he wanted to date you so he could learn to be like you. Although it was the beginning of what he hoped was a new relationship, Jaehyun already had so much respect for you, and as you joked around with him about whatever the two of you could think of, Jaehyun’s excitement for the the future held only increased more and more.

Past life video

That was my actual past life btw! Lemme know what y’all get 😩 also just go on the website if you get a lot of ads - bc that can fuck w ur hypnotization! It’s not scary, I promise. The dude has a super nice voice. It’s vv trippy. If you’re a skeptic - do it anyway. Worst case scenario, you get a good laugh.