#okay end yap session JFKDS

[starryeyed-apple]

hi starrr i’m gonna do 21 for the ask game and ask: top 3 songs that remind you of caleb, and top 3 that remind you of xavier?

HIIIII omg iris ily for asking me this, I love slapping songs onto my pixel bfs. I am about to yap like crazy though so be warned

caleb

number one I have to go with Ribs by Lorde. I wrote a whole fic because of how CalebMC coded it is, like it was on repeat for hours and days and only removed from my top song spot by Nettles lol. it just embodies all of that youthful nostalgia, emphasis on the -algia because it is PAINFUL and I love it. "I want 'em back, the minds we had" always makes me cry thinking about how much they were torn apart after growing up together.

I need to choose a Taylor song, and I'm trying not to put loml because we talked about that already haha, so I'm going with coney island. especially for post homecoming wings right when they've reunited. all that tension and uncertainty, being unable to recognize him. "did I close my fist around something delicate, did I shatter you?" makes me think of his anecdote too: "He knows he's always been good at destroying delicate things." I think about that line a lot tbh. (also the whole amusement park analogy!!)

I'm putting I, Carrion (Icarian) by Hozier and it's specifically for my beloved Ultimate Weapon X-02. "if I should fall on that day, I only pray, don't fall away from me" and thinking about how she leaps after him and they do fall together and they're finally together in that final moment. but also specifically that moment of pure relief on his face when you say that you want to be with him in that moment, nowhere else. the whole song feels like falling, and that feeling of acceptance and peace with each other in the end.

xavier

Xavier is so Mitski coded to me, Francis Forever especially. it makes me think of him being stranded on Earth for hundreds of years and replaying those fading memories of MC from two of her lifetimes with every spring and season that comes and goes. "on sunny days I go out walking, I end up on a tree-lined street, I look up at the gaps of sunlight, I miss you more than anything"

Leonard Cohen by boygenius. this one is a little selfish because it's one of my main songs for a light that never goes out but it just captures that little snapshot in time moment I get from his romance. to me Xavier feels like love in those quiet little moments, intimate and domestic. and the "I never thought you'd happen to me" makes me choke up every time. meeting MC for the third time and finally getting to be together after so long!!

New Year's Day by Taylor Swift. again, it's those little moments where the love really shines through, and that commitment to the long haul together. "hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you, and I will hold on to you." again, him remembering MC for so long only to reunite, and this time he won't let go!

edit: okay here is my caleb playlist and xavier playlist