#one thing about frank he'll commit to a bit

[asummersarah]

frank having one sided beef with ringo over pizza was not on my 2025 bingo card😭

[holy-puckslibrary]

━ 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥.

──────────── 𝐰𝐜 — 1.9k 𝐜𝐰 — everyone is aged up / non-canon compliant ages bc i said so; rafe being an emotionally constipated, toxic douche-canoe 3000; an unhealthy dynamic; suggestive moments but not explicit; w*rd + substance mention, wheeze bein' a savage; and a potential cliffhanger? 𝐚/𝐧 — this is a lil nugget from a mini-series i have in the works :) lmk if you’d like to see more in the future! 💌 ────────────

main masterlist | MDNI

IF EVER THERE were a time when a human being might actually be capable of blowing steam from their ears, it would be this one.

Rafe Cameron has been pacing the length of the chapel's private lot since he dragged you out here who knows how long ago. Mumbling crudely configured sentences and half-baked schemes under his breath, he looks every bit the loose canon he's been branded as.

While not ideal, things could be worse—a lot worse. At the very least, he hasn't punched anything yet; concrete wall, tree trunk, or otherwise.

The "otherwise" in this situation (and most, to be frank) is JJ Maybank's pretty face.

Apparently, Rafe doesn't appreciate the way he's been touching you all afternoon.

"If that fuckin' pogue knows what's good for him, he—he'll keep his filthy hands off what's mine."

Strong words for someone who refuses to even attempt exclusivity, or make any sort of commitment whatsoever.

You gnaw on your cheek until copper stings your tongue.

JJ has to touch you, it's unavoidable.

Sarah, his younger sister and your lifelong best friend, has asked you to be her Maid of Honor and, to absolutely no one's surprise, John B, her fiancé, asked JJ Maybank to serve as his Best Man.

Sarah's older brother doesn't see it that way.

And why would he? That would involve rational thinking and a modicum of maturity—two things Rafe is allergic to.

In his perfect world, you would walk in the procession having left a him-sized gap, and, even then, he'd probably decide that wasn't enough. Knowing him, there would need to be an ocean between you two before Rafe was finally satisfied. And still, you know for certain he'd find something else to bitch about.

It's almost like he enjoys getting himself all worked up.

"Rafe, I'm not a pet or a toy to play tug-of-war with on the playground."

At your sudden burst of exasperation, the pacing comes to a screeching halt. And thank god for that; the repetition was starting to make you nauseous.

Just as firmly as his jaw, Rafe's fists clench at his sides.

"When did I say that you were?" he spews his venom at you, but his fervid attention remains fixed on the cracked pavement baking in the late afternoon rays. Rafe kicks a pebble into the side of a parked car, then continues, "—because I don't recall saying that. And you know how I feel about words being put into my mouth."

"No," you all but growl. "—but that's what you meant."

Your teeth ache from grinding them together. A migraine is forming at either temple, but you're already too exhausted by this conversation to massage it away before it takes root. You have your hands full with one headache right now, there's no room for another on your plate. But, like the eldest Cameron's emotional maelstrom, landfall is inevitable.

Rafe glares at you, but doesn't say anything to the contrary.

This begrudged acquiescence is the closest you ever come to Rafe admitting that you were right about something.

Or apologizing.

"Well, whatever you are, you're still mine. Something he doesn't respect and you seem to have forgotten—and I think we're overdue for a little reminder, sweetness."

He reaches for you, and you halfheartedly bat his hands away.

"Rafe, can we just... can we please do this some other time? I have to get back to—"

"—to your side piece from The Cut?"

"—to Sarah. Your sister. Y'know, the one who's getting married this weekend?" You cross your arms over your chest. Rafe rolls his eyes, clearly irritated you decided to cock-block his ogling. "—in case that bit of information got lost in your ego."

"Wow, you're really antsy to get back in there." His eyebrows jump, somehow unfettered by his audacity. The supplemental away from me is omitted, but deafening. "There's no need to be so defensive—if you have nothing to feel guilty for, that is."

You don't dignify his badgering with a response.

His tongue punches his cheek, and he looks away, as if depriving you of eye contact is a punishment in and of itself.

Rafe is trying to bait you into an actual fight so that he can exercise his big, bottled-up emotions without having to acknowledge their existence or their cause. There's too much left to do before the ceremony; you don't have time to spare for something as juvenile and pointless as feeding into his emotional scapegoat.

"If you're spreading 'em for Maybank, at least give me a head's up so I can get tested. It's common courtesy, sweetness."

Cold and debilitating, like a scorpion's venom, his accusation is devoid of the familiarity you've grown fond of. Under Rafe's prickly carapace of indifference, he is spiteful and chronically insecure.

This is what happens when you don't purge yourself of whatever is bothering you. Pent up, the negativity builds and builds day in and day out. The knot gets bigger, stronger, and harder to ignore the longer it's left undealt with. The conflict between inner turmoil and externalized chaos, often projected onto an underserving substitute, is harsh and bitter, persisting until there's nothing left to leverage. Denial is a dreadful opponent and an impenetrable armor.

You are the frog today, and you are more often than not. Perhaps there was a time when turns were frequently taken, but you can't remember.

In shooting to sting, he'll kill himself just the same. Yet, despite the assured detriment to your livelihood, you put your faith in rational deterrence and permit the arachnid to crawl onto your back.

A sense of duty is easily preyed upon, and a desire for benevolence can leave you blind to the true nature of things. Instinct, natural or nurtured, doesn't have to be a death sentence. Nor is it a prescription for life. Villainy, like goodness, is a choice.

The frog may not be able to sting or fight, but it can leap.

"Would you just shut up?"

You bring his mouth to yours before any more garbage can spill out.

He's keyed up on jealousy and, most likely, something else. Rafe's intent on pushing you away with tired cheap shots in a fit of anger. You've known him long enough to know that, in the absence of control, he does and says the exact opposite of what he feels.

He refuses to be vulnerable in any healthy way, instead preferring to throw double-edged rocks at your window from behind a wilting bush.

Words are incompatible with Rafe's trauma-soaked mind. He'll hear whatever it is you have to say—Hell, he might even believe it for a few minutes—but a life of too many broken promises and poorly disguised lies depreciated their value.

Action—that's what Rafe can grasp. For something to click and stick, it must be tangible. You kissed him to express your loyalty in the only way he understands.

And to make him shut up. Definitely that, too.

"I should've ignored Sarah when she said a spray bottle was a bad idea."

Your eyes are slow to open, but you jump away from Rafe anyway. As if you've been caught with your hand in the cookie jar, or like you betrayed some great conspiracy. Like he burned you.

It may not have a label, but your charged relationship with the Cameron heir is an open secret on Kiladare. Still, you're not too keen on public displays of affection—if anything you subject each other to could even be considered gentle or loving.

Intimate, sure. An attachment, definitely. The jury's still out on the health of such a volatile symbiosis, but such an entanglement is a bitch to bury.

You've tried.

Rafe's jaw clenches, annoyed by the irksome interruption now more than any slight you've perpetrated. "Wheezie, can't you see we're in the middle of something?"

"Something I saw a little too much of," she retorts with an exaggerated gag.

You bite down on your cheeks to keep your laughter at bay. You're in no mood to poke the bear further than he's already stabbed himself.

"Run along, the adults are talking."

Again, Rafe reaches for you. This time, you step out of bounds.

She means well, but the youngest Cameron has a big mouth and a propensity for gossip. She's also a compulsive eavesdropper. Wheezie might butt in and stir the pot far less now than she did a few years ago, but when it comes to Rafe, all bets are off. They may be each other's preferred sibling, bonded by their inability to best Sarah in the rat race for their father's attention and approval, but in their household, it's everyone for themselves.

And she's had her eye on the special edition Animal Crossing Switch console for weeks; she'll throw you both under the bus without a thought. Especially, if it means not waiting 'till Christmas to have it in her tween-age hands.

You throw her a bone, and yourself a lifeline. "What's up, Wheeze?"

She gives her brother a final glare, then turns to face you fully. Her features are twisted with exasperation, an understandable feeling considering who her siblings are and the family she's had the misfortune of being born into.

"Sarah wants to practice the rings. Again. So, hurry up and finish sucking face, adults. We have more important things to do."

Wheezie stomps off before either you or Rafe can get a word in. For her, the conversation ran its course. No need to stick around.

"Can I ask something stupid?" Rafe asks once his sister is out of earshot.

His voice is a bit wobbly, and while you know he'll make you regret it later, but you just can't help yourself: "Don't you always?"

Rafe clears his throat, then rubs his jaw like it might grant him the right words.

"We only... y'know with each other, right? I-I mean, I just figured since you're stuck to me like fucking velcro you're in the same boat. I mean—talk about stage five clinger. And, don't get me wrong, I would've unstuck you, but this," Rafe gestures to what little space remains between you. "—is way more convenient than all the hoops and shit of getting with someone else."

You know what he's actually asking—you've been fluent in "Rafe" since the fourth grade. Just one of the many, many joys of your fathers' life-long bromance.

He wants you to spill your guts before he does. He wants certainty; a safety net of prior knowledge.

—Rafe wants power.

"Totally," you drawl, humoring him with half the effort you normally would. Rafe squirms under your knowing gaze. "All for convenience, babe."

"Are you mocking me?" 

"Don't I always?" you counter through a smirk that makes Rafe feel as though he's staring into a splintered funhouse mirror.

Rafe watches you slip back into the chapel, wishing that he said more... wishing he'd said less. He follows your figure down the hallway until the metal door shuts with a rancorous thud.

When he shuts his eyes—a lukewarm attempt to calm his racing heart in the relentless summer sun—all Rafe can think about is your parting wink.

And the God-awful churn of emotion it triggered.

──────────── 

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[literaryvein-reblogs]

Hello!

There is something I want to write regarding a character who isn't well liked because he's mainly in a show to serve as the comedic/perverted role. I do see potential to flesh out other traits that he exhibits, but I find it a little difficult given his poor reputation.

Basically, whatever is perverse, sexist, or annoying about him, I want to address it as flaws, but give hope that HE CAN learn to be better.

So I guess what I'm asking is, do you have any tips for dealing with characters who have his particular flaws and how to write them in a way that leads to change?

I'm really sorry if that's super specific, I'm just a bit clueless here.

Writing Ideas: Comedic Relief Characters

some tropes related to comedic relief and perversion

Lovable Sex Maniac: This form of The Casanova goes above and beyond the average sleaze, engaging in the full spectrum of perversion — from dabbling in pornography to blatant sexual (or in some cases, bisexual) advances. May also come with an Extreme Libido. The only thing that keeps the Lovable Sex Maniac from being a truly disturbing Anti-Hero is that his antics are always Played for Laughs… and the odd thing is, it usually works. The methods to successfully soft-sell such a character are many: (a) from making them a Chivalrous Pervert, (b) to them being mysteriously successful at romance, (c) to their perversions not requiring other people, (d) to them just being unusually and extremely frank about sex, (e) to them not minding striking out and just moving on to the next potential partner, (f) to just having commitment issues. Regardless, he (or more rarely she) is not interested in uninterested partners, thus making the "Lovable" part somewhat reasonable. A Hard-Drinking Party Girl can double as the Lovable Sex Maniac with, interestingly, very little change just because she's female.

The Casanova: A perverted womanizer who is constantly seeking out new sexual partners. He loves 'em, then leaves 'em. The Master Swordsman of perverts, he's a predator whose only motivation is indulging his personal lusts and desires. Sometimes comic, sometimes sinister, always successful, this character leaves behind a string of broken hearts, and occasional vows of revenge that are rarely fulfilled. The Casanova's only motivation is indulging his lust and desire, sating them with the bodies of his completely willing conquests. If he develops feelings for one of his conquests (or someone who refuses him), he's a Ladykiller in Love. If that love transforms him into a committed and responsible partner and father, then he's become a Reformed Rake.

Reformed Rake: "Reformed rakes make the best husbands," was a Stock Phrase in Regency England, and is now commonly found in period romances. A Reformed Rake is what happens when the heroine of a romance story wants to eat her cake and matrimonially have it too. She ends up with a former womanizer with a penchant for criminal activity who doesn't just accept monogamy but thrives in it. Rakes — men famous for cutting a swathe through the wives and mistresses of the town — not only know how to please a lady and protect her from harm, but they are only waiting for that one special woman who will cause them to reform and turn into the perfect husband and family man.

Chivalrous Pervert: He can't stop checkin' out the ladies (and sometimes the fellas), but he'll be the first to defend her should the villain be an actually dangerous pervert.

Plucky Comic Relief: A character whose main purpose is to relieve tension with oddball and/or hysterical, buffoonish antics. This trope is also known as the "comic relief" and in The Team trope it is known as the Funny Guy.

Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist: A comedy protagonist who's a complete jerk, but is rooted for anyway because of their amusing personality. This is a very common trait in British comedy, which has a greater appreciation for truly detestable characters compared to American comedy which tries to keep them more heroic. When the main character in an American comedy is like this, they'll often take a level in kindness and become a more likable character by the end.

Examples

Austin Powers, though he does zig-zag with the Lovable Sex Maniac trope. On the one hand, he definitely is a fun-loving womanizer who likes to shag whenever he can. On the other hand, he does have a chivalrous side as well. When he was living in the '60s, even though he really liked his partner Mrs. Kensington, he never took it past fun and harmless flirting because she was married. Then when he came to the '90s, while he really liked his new partner Vanessa (Mrs. Kensington's daughter), he didn't do anything with her at first because she was drunk at the time and he didn't want to take advantage of her like that.

The lead character in Fleabag is a Lovable Sex Maniac. Or at least, that's the persona she wants us to see. It's demonstrated throughout the series that she behaves this way to cover up for her absolutely massive self-esteem issues, and is shown to be a symptom of her detachment from everyone around her except her (deceased) best friend. Who (accidentally) killed herself after Fleabag had sex with her boyfriend. It's left ambiguous as to whether or not she knew what Fleabag had done, but Fleabag's guilt over the situation leaves her spiraling.

Classical Mythology: Dionysus, god of revelry, was near the embodiment of the id unleashed, something his followers found/find utterly charming, which includes hitting on anyone who passed by that he was not directly related to. Aphrodite, goddess of beauty, was extremely promiscuous, proud of it, and well-liked for it. Several of her temples were art, charity, and sex houses at the same time. Eos, the goddess of the dawn, was sex-obsessed and often kidnapped lovers, yet she wasn't portrayed as antagonistic for this.

Naveen from The Princess and the Frog is a rich prince who claims to have dated thousands of women (and is indeed seen flirting with three in his introductory scene). One Road Trip Romance culminating in marriage with Tiana later, he's a loving husband who helps her start her new restaurant.

A number of Arthur Conan Doyle's short stories (and even some Sherlock Holmes stories) feature Reformed Rakes — in one case, the wife's positive influence was so great that her widower listens to her exhortations not to fall back into drink on gramophone and says it's the only thing keeping him going.

Howl of Howl's Moving Castle, is sort of a Reformed Rake. His heart was literally missing and Sophie had to reform him by finding it. He's still a snarky, cowardly, overdramatic peacock of a wizard; he just doesn't chase every girl in Ingary anymore.

The literary James Bond is a Chivalrous Pervert in spades.

Game of Thrones: Tyrion Lannister's reputation across Westeros for his drinking and whoring is such that the brothel in Winterfell awaits his arrival with great enthusiasm. However, he almost always treats women with great respect, and loathes to see them harmed or abused in any way. Given his disgust for people who treat weaker people badly and his personal history, this makes perfect sense. When he and Sansa Stark are forced into a political marriage by his father, Tyrion can plainly see her reluctance to go through with consummating the relationship. Even though he's extremely drunk, he still stops her from undressing and tells her that he won't bed her until she actually wants him to.

In Catching Fire, the sequel of The Hunger Games, Finnick is the object of every girl's affection and he's rumored to exploit that for his own pleasure. Although, as revealed in Mockingjay, this may actually be a subversion. He does love one single woman, Annie, and was forced into becoming a sex slave by the Capitol to protect her. His heartbreaker reputation is just the public front for what's really going on.

Jane Austen, who inspired a lot of Regency Romance though she didn't exactly write it, liked to Deconstruct the idea that people could reform their spouses, and used the Reformed Rake variant specifically in Mansfield Park. Fanny Price's Abhorrent Admirer Henry Crawford boasts that he will be the first person to ever treat her as well as she deserves, and the narrator agrees in the epilogue that he would have been successful… if he'd only had enough principle to stop trifling with other women's feelings to gratify his vanity. Instead, he is forced to acknowledge that Fanny's harsh evaluation of his character — that he lacks 'constancy' — was completely accurate.

Sources: 1 2 ⚜ More: Notes ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs ⚜ Unlikable to Likable

Hi, here are some related tropes you can use as inspiration. Modify and/or combine them to create the specific character you're going for.

You can start with one trope then transition to another as the story progresses (e.g., from an unlikable Casanova mixed with elements of the comedic relief character tropes, then perhaps your character could turn into a Reformed Rake, still maintaining some humorous characteristics, but becoming more likable — due to finally becoming committed, kind, and/or other changes suggested above — or maybe becoming, more similar to what you described, the Lovable Sex Maniac). Also included some examples to get an idea on how other authors develop similar characters. You can go through the links for more details and examples. Hope this helps with your writing!

[rumeysawrites]

Thank you @imsoveryveryconfusedatlife for the tag!

Here're the headcanons I got forsome of my characters in this generator.

Rosena can kill you in an instant, but won't.

For the early books, not really because she isn't really deadly (except being able to freeze people with her power), later on, probably.

Shan knocks people over by bugging them.

Not really, mostly. He'll try his best to not bother anyone. Despite this, his upbeat attitude can seem annoying, but not too much he'd knock them over.

If someone they knew commited a crime, Kent would cover for them.

Nope. He would encourage them to admit their guilt. He's the biggest law-follower among the Legendaries. If the serson in qiestion is someone he cares about, he will try to convince them to admitting. If not, he'll probably be the one turning them over.

Faren believes in ghosts and insists on trying to summon one at every sleepover.

I mean, spirits are a common knowledge among the people of Eight Alters. So she does believe in them. I'm not sure if she tries to summon them at sleepovers though. She'd probably be up for that and thinks it'd be fun.

Tom watched the Sonic movie.

100%. He had to watch the movie after Miracate told him for the hundredth time (and joking that he might as well be Tom from the movie in the future :D). He did have a good time with his friend group while watching though.

Miyuki believes in Santa.

Nope. She's the least unlikely person to believe in Santa.

Elvis has an incredible short-term memory, but an awful long term memory.

Quite the opposite. His long term memory is great, but he struggles with things requiring shorter term nemory like studying.

Marcelino got hit by a bus once.

Uh sure. I'm still figuring out his backstory anyways.

Nour does intricate and expensive cosplays.

She...doesn't do cosplays.

Mert hacks their stats in every video game they play.

Not really. He gets thrill out of competition and the challenge, even though he gets irritated when his luck goes to negatives.

If Frank was presented with an intergalactic portal, they'd enter it without question.

Of course. That's just another day of work for him.

Itzal stole a lollipop at the checkout when they were 5, and they still feel guilty about it.

He has more things to feel guilty about than just a lollipop. Trust me.

Chromos is the gay cousin.

Did Frank take control of the generator?😅 Honestly, I still don't know what Chromos' sexuality is going to be. But the stereotypical "gay cousin" attitude is kind of opposite of his personality.

Alondra wears Hello Kitty socks.

She probably used to. She loves cute things like that. But being both a hero and a music artist who performs, she tries to look more fashionable, and like the (young) adult she is.

Tarrence sings in the shower.

This is not a headcanon. This is 200% canon.

Tania is an olddst child.

No she's a middle child. Acts a bit like a younger sibling sometimes though.

Toby is not allowed to drink energy drinks.

Duh, he's an energetic 8 year old, so if course. But there's a funny reason why this is canon .

Shuang has an intense fear of spiders.

She's disgusted by them and can act a little panicky when she sees one, but I wouldn't say she has a fear of them. She might develop such a fear later on though.

Miracate was dropped out of a window as a child.

Sure. This won't make her backstory any more complicated. Besides, bith her and Mather were troublesome enough to walk on windowsills as kids as well. So that might explain it.

Mather's favorite subject in school was Math.

Nope! Not at all! Also, shout-out to the headcanon generator for making the third ever Math-er pun!

Faryal listens to 80s music.

I...don't think Faryal knows much about the music in our world. She might have heard songs during her Academy years, but then, would more likely be interested in listening to classical music, opera, or traditional music.

Acer has a pet lizard.

He would probably love the idea. But anyone else besides him and Faren might not. Just make sure that lizard isn't a wild dragon.

Eirlys screams like an anime girl.

Sirry what? I mean...she does take screaming breaks every now and then but not like that-

Stefinis was forced to eat cement as a child.

Quite the oppisite happened actually. Him (as a Merasian elf whose entire family disguising as humans), tried to eat plants & minerals edible to most folks in Meras, but not to humans, and his parents would have to constantly have to keep an eye on him to make sure he didn't eat something like cement or a crystal, in front of his friends.

Blyss sleeps in until noon.

Nope! The fire princess is an early bird who likes to get things done as soon as possible.

Jake watches My Little Pony.

Pretty sure his father got DVDs for the MLP movies, especially for Claire (Jake's younger sister). But Jake himself might join, claiming he's only there to make sure there's no harmful content in the movies.

Maerwynn is very good at using chopsticks.

Probably. She's a royal who'd be trained in all sorts of etiquette, including using utensils after all.

Arwyn chews their nails when nervous.

Not when nervous, but when stressed. Which is like half of all the time.

Aelwen can't handle criticism.

Probanly, if she cared enough about the criticizing person's opinioms at least. Fot 9 times out of 10, she doesn't care.

It would not take much for Vlad to turn evilm

Nope! He's been living with The Villains for over a hundred years, and still has kept a bigger good side to him than most others.

Vesta nearly drowned in a river as a child.

Probably...

Botolfe can't spell resturaunt.

Quite the opposite. He's probably one of the three people in his group who can actually spell with no oroblem.

Vanora is smart, but also very stupid.

Vanora would dusagree, but yes. This is accurate.

Of Ignacius likes someone, thy willl give them a pretty rock.

It's 100% true if those pretty rocks also hapoen to be dragon eggs..

Nihynia forgets to eat sometimes.

I mean, she's a goddess who doesn't need to eat. So I'm pretty sure she doesn't care about eating much. Naybe sometimes to enjoy the taste though.

Anyways! Here're the no pressure tags: @dearunreliablenarrator @heycerulean @writeblrfantasy @author-a-holmes @the-ellia-west @thecomfywriter @mudkissedgirl @yomikunp and an open tag!

Tag Game: Random Headcanon Generator

Thanks @tildeathiwillwrite for the tag here!

Tagging @xenon-writes-sometimes, @illarian-rambling, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @mudkissedgirl, @rumeysawrites,

@agirlandherquill, @clearcloudlesssky and an open tag!

—

Rules: use this headcanon generator to make headcanons for your OCs! Then talk about how accurate they are.

—

Odi reads AO3

Yes.

Dee is an oldest child

Unfortunately, that’s just incorrect. I don’t think they give oldest child energy either

Azzy makes your mom jokes

Certainly not in polite company. But at home, maybe, especially if she was drunk. It’s possible

Eika has been cancelled on twitter

And he wears that badge with fucking pride

Atalanta tells dad jokes.

Those are fighting words to Atalanta. I think the implication she would tell dad jokes would seriously damage her friendship with you.

Kika gets bullied on Roblox

Absolutely. Probably by his own brother too.

Mel would succumb to the fog

?? I think I’m missing a reference

Shethla knows the lyrics to every Britney Spears song by heart.

He’s absolutely the type to be blasting something in the car. Its a 50/50 between it being an absurd death metal indie no one has heard of or Britney Spears

—

Thanks again for the tag!

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

A Voice Through the Nothingness Part 2

Series Masterlist

Part 1

Contains: Fluff, angst, protective Frank

4.0K words

Comment if you want to be tagged or follow #a voice through the nothingness.

“There’s not a word yet for old friends who’ve just met.” - Jim Henson

Hazel smiled as she sat next to Billy's bed, it had only been a week since she had started reading to him but it had become a welcome moment of peace. She took his hand in hers and placed the next book on the bed, it was Death on the Nile this time, "it looks like we're opening up next week." 

Billy was elated, he wanted to cheer but he couldn't. He knew his friends would love Hazel. He could see the meeting in his head, Frank would wrap her in one of his bone crushing bear hugs, Curtis would extend his hand with a smile and Karen would insist on drinks at the bar with Matt and Foggy.  

Each time Hazel's voice had floated into his mind and her warm hand linked in his, he had focused all his energy on just one squeeze but so far, it had been fruitless. His frustration grew as he always managed to do it when she wasn't there. Sometimes it was a moment after she left, sometimes it took all day for him to manage a twitch but he was going to do it.  

He knew the other voice too, Lizabeth's, and he wondered if she looked as fed up as she always sounded, "you should tell me about your day, he's probably getting sick of your murder mysteries by now." 

Hazel huffed, "I don't think he wants to hear that." 

"Of course I do." That was all he wanted to say but he couldn't even manage a sound. He wanted far more than what Hazel had said about herself in passing. 

Lizzy sighed, "just give him the spark notes, then you can start the book." 

Billy heard Lizabeth leave the room and he waited for Hazel's soft voice to fill his ears, "she won't let up until I do," Billy believed it, "well, it started bad because I spilt my coffee and it was the last of what I had at home so I had to brave the subway uncaffeinated. I thought I was going to commit homicide because the person next to me was chewing too loud." 

He wanted to laugh, to tell her stories about being stuck in holes with men who behaved like pigs. 

"Then I got a call about Barry's fancy food, it's on time so he'll get his clams before he grows legs and lungs and eats me in the middle of the night." Barry was Hazel's pufferfish, although Billy thought she was talking about a dog the first time she spoke of him.

He could say so many things, he wondered if she would be shy or smile and toss him something back. 

"And I'm pretty sure a doctor just asked me on a date, I said yes." Billy could hear his huff, a woman that beautiful should know when she's being asked out. 

"But he's kinda of ass so I'm just going to be nice and call it an early night. I'm far too busy to date right now, he'll you're the only man who listens to me and you're pretty much in a coma." 

Billy could feel a charge in his chest, had he been awake, this would have been easy. 

"Now that's enough about me, let's crack open a fresh book and settle in." 

****

Billy knew it was coming, that dreaded chime, but he was planning on it. Days of matching each word with the passing seconds until he could count down until the bell rang, "well Billy, I'll be back tomorrow." 

For the last twenty minutes, he put all his attention into just closing his hand. He thought it was another failed attempt as he felt Hazel's hand leave him but his hand ached and his fingers shifted and she paused. 

Billy waited for her dismissal but it never came, "can you do that again?" He had a feeling that was coming and put every ounce of willpower into fulfilling her request. He must have done it because he felt her jump. 

"Ok, alright. I going to get Lizzy in here, umm" Hazel's hand slipped for his briefly and he heard the call bell, "in a bit, Lizzy's going to swap with me. If you're doing this intentionally you need to squeeze her hand too, that's all I want you to focus on." 

He steeled himself, just a little longer and he could rest. He heard footsteps, "what is it?" Lizabeth sounded worried. 

"He squeezed my hand and I got him to do it again, I'm pretty sure this isn't just a reflect." Hazel sounded so hopeful, he wasn't going to disappoint her. 

He could almost feel Lizzy waving her hand, "give him ere, Russo, I know we're not on as good of terms but can you let me know you're not bullshitting?" 

Billy liked this woman, her hand was different from Hazel's, still warm and soft but different. He focused on Lizabeth's hand in his, going over his fingers as he willed them to move, "holy shit you're right." 

Lizzy's hand was gone and Hazel's was back, "I'm going to go get the Neruo, you stay right there." 

He was so proud of himself, it had taken every bit of his strength but he got to hear joy in Hazel's voice. "You won't need to do any more today, they'll let you have some time to get your strength back but they'll want to do some tests. I'll stay until the docs get here and when I get back tomorrow, we'll pick up where we left off. You did really good Billy. Your friends are going to be so proud of you." 

The next few hours were a blur of tests and doctors. Hazel was right, they didn't ask him to do anything else but they talked him through everything. Just when he thought he couldn't take any more, it stopped and he was finally left in the peace he needed to prepare for the next day. 

****

Hazel came in the next day with excitement in her voice, her hand sliding into his with a familiar warmth, "today's going to be a lot of work but I know you can do it. The docs are going be in here with us are they're going ask you some yes, no questions. All you have to do is show me what those answers feel like and we'll go from there." 

He gave her a quick squeeze, "ok, you've got this, don't worry. And if you don't feel like it today, we can try again tomorrow."

There were footsteps, ones he had learned well in all his time at the hospital, "Hello Mr Russo, I'm doctor Waston, I think you've heard my voice before. Can you show Hazel what a yes is?" 

He focused on holding on for a second longer than he had been, "yes?" He did it again, "ok Dr, long squezze for yes." 

Now that his brain had a mission, it felt like his thoughts were racing and he tried to visualise things he wanted. 

"Can you show Miss Moreau a no?" Billy 

Billy's brain was working overtime now that he had her last name, he could focus on learning more about her. All he needed to do was get it to Frank. He clenched his hand and let go as fast as he could manage, "ok, short for no, can you do it again to let me know?" Billy was anxious to get this moving.

Hazel's voice grew clearer by the second, "yep, short squeeze for no." There was a pause and Billy thought he could hear something being passed to Hazel, "do you remember where we first met?"

He imagined clasping her hand in his as they walked down the street, hoping the vision would keep his fingers tensed, "yes. Was it on boat?" He released his hand and gave her a short squeeze.

"Was it on a train platform?" He was sitting across for her at the table inside the chocolate shop she had told him about. Hazel inhaled, "yes, good work Billy. You don't have long left now and then we'll let you rest. I'm going you ask some questions about your time here and I need to tell me if you remember, can you do that?" When the doctor realised that Billy was ready to communicate, they called his friends for questions they could ask him about conversations they had throughout Billy's stay.

He was still sitting in the chocolate shop. Hazel had a foam moustache and a fleck of chocolate on her plump lower lip, "do you remember when Frank told you about the new iPhone?"

Of course he did, Frank wouldn't shut up about how stupid it was, "that's good. Do you remember when you moved here? Frank and Curt were with you, they told you all about the room." He thought for a moment, white walls, lots of flowers, the nurses were dressed in light blue scrubs.

Billy searched his brain for something else, he was dancing with her at a fundraiser, she had carnations in her hair and her fingers were laced in his, "Great, that's really good Billy."

There was quiet for a moment, "I'm not asking him that, I think we should take a break." Hazel sounded angry, he didn't like it.

"Of course, I told you we'd take you lead on this."

But Billy didn't want to stop, he wanted to prove he could handle anything. He clenched his hand and then let go, hoping Hazel would pick up on what he was saying, there was a pause before she spoke, "ok Billy, I understand. Do you remember what happened the night you were hurt?"

As Billy tried to find the memories, he felt his heart race and then suddenly he couldn't feel Hazel's hand, all he could feel was agony, searing pain and breaking bones and the sound of Frank screaming his name over an unbearable ringing. Things faded fast, the darkness of pain dissolving to just darkness, he was grateful that the last thing he felt was Hazel's hand on his cheek.

****

Billy didn't sleep at all that night, the moment his awareness returned, it was like he couldn't stop his heart racing. All he wanted to do was open his eyes, to ground himself in the real world rather than the one that was pounding on the inside of his skull. 

Waiting for Hazel's late afternoon visit was torture, he had spent his spare moments learning the sounds of everyone's footsteps, and Hazel's was by far his favourite. 

Her hello made his heart skip, she had good news, "Hello Billy, I have good news and better news. The good news is that they're going to move you into one of the rebab rooms so you'll have more people to talk to, the better news is that the hospital will be open for visitors on Sunday." 

He clenched his hand, hoping that the long press gave away that he was happy, "alright, now that we can talk, I can ask you if you want me to keep going with our murder mystery train, so you wanna pick up where we left off with Agatha?" 

No, Billy didn't want that, he wanted to hear about her, he wanted to know how her date with the doctor went. He closed his hand then let go, "alright then, I'm hearing you loud and clear. We can figure this out, do you want to watch some TV? Your plan has all the channels." 

Billy gave her another short squeeze, the frustration made him want to punch something. He racked his brain for an idea, combing through his thoughts until something popped up. He focused all his energy on lifting his thumb before tapping her skin quickly twice and once for longer, dot dot dash. He did it again, Hazel was an intelligent woman, she would understand that he was trying to do something even if she didn't understand what he was saying. 

"Billy, are you using morse code?" He closed his hand hard, "ok, ok. U?" He could almost see her thinking, "oh, you want to hear about me?" 

There was surprise in her voice, Billy couldn't decide if he liked that sound because, of course, he wanted to hear about her, "ok. Well I gave Barry his clams and he made a huge mess of his tank so I'm trying to teach him how to clean up, it's not going well. I tried a new coffee too, it's called rainbow bark roast, it's alright but I think I'm going to sign up for one the those subscription services where they send you different beans every month."

Billy wanted to tell her about the coffee he had at Anvil, about how his first frivolous purchase was an expensive coffee machine that looked like something off a steampunk spaceship. He was surprised at all the small things he wanted to share with Hazel, the little parts of his life he never thought mattered to anyone but he knew that would have mattered to her.

"Oh and I went on that date, not date, I told you about." He was happy at the disappointment in her tone, "it went exactly how I expected it to go, he talked about himself nonstop and then complained about the wine being too floral. I mean we all know wine tasting is bullshit, it's just fermented grape juice, I'd rather drink whiskey."

She liked whiskey, Billy thought to himself. There was a bar a few blocks away from Anvil that she'd love if he could only tell her about it. "You look like a guy Gin guy, I've never been able to get into it, it kinda smells like the ER on a busy friday."

He squeezed her hand then let go and she laughed, that was a sound he did like, "no? Then what do you like?"

He struck a blank, he knew what W was, he just couldn't remember it, "just take your time, all I need is a few letters." All the happy feelings vanished, he couldn't remember something as fucking simple as a letter. It didn't matter, Hazel was there with a solution.

"We can figure it out together. B for bourbon is one dash then three dots," he knew that, "S for scotch is three dots," he knew that too, "and W is.."

It came to him in a flash and he tapped it out as fast as he could, "there you go. Does that mean you're a whiskey man?"

He imagined sitting next to her on the couch, her hand in his while he enjoyed a quiet night with a glass in his hand, "ahh, a man after my own heart. You're pretty smart, you know, it would have never occurred to me to ask you to try Morse code. I have an idea, how about we got through the whole alphabet together? That was when you're friends can visit, you don't have to think so hard. Does that sound good to you?"

He hoped the force of his squeeze let her know all on its own, "great, let's start at the beginning."

****

It was slow going, but being able to tap words out opened up a whole new world. Hazel was fantastic at putting small things together. She learned Billy liked watching MMA, and the next day, she had the rundowns of all the fights that had been on since the lockdown. He was getting stronger, too, and he was slowly getting better at expressing his feelings through how hard he would squeeze her hand.

Billy's favourite times were when he got to talk about his friends, Anvil and all the places he had been. The information he could give was basic, as much as he wanted to pour his heart out, it was hard when it sometimes took him twenty minutes to tap out a seven letter word. That didn't matter to Hazel, she was always patient with him, he never felt like he couldn't answer her but she always gave him just enough of a challenge and helped him rise to it.

Sunday came in what felt like hours but Hazel never entered his room. He held on for visit her all day and the joy of hearing his friends did little to overcome her absence. Nevertheless, Frank's hand in his dulled the ache.

"Hey Bill, it's good to see you again, although from what your nurses said, you had plenty of company while we were away."

Billy wanted to tell Frank all about Hazel and once again, the frustration at his limitations was back. If he couldn't tell Frank, he would have to show him. He tapped out her name as fast as he could and Frank's laugh filled his ears, "oh, so you haven't seen me in two months and the first thing you want me to do is get your new best friend, that's cold Bill."

There was no malice in Frank's voice and the chime of the call bell filled him with hope. Lizzy's footsteps followed and Billy's heart fluttered, "yes Mr Castle, what can I get for you?"

Frank chuckled, "can you go get Hazel? Billy's asking for her."

Lizzy smiled, "I can, she'll be taking her break soon."

Billy heard her leave the room, and Frank's voice filled the space, "we were really glad to hear you had someone with you. Karen was trying to get in here without getting us into shit, but all she could come up with was a story on the hospital's cafe."

Hazel had told him about it, he knew that story wouldn't be a good one.

Frank's tone changed just as he finished telling Billy all about how Anvil was going and Frank's hand shifted from his as he stood up. "You must be Hazel?"

Billy's body filled with anticipation, "I am. It's so good to finally meet you. Billy speaks very highly of you."

Frank chuckled, "oh, I'm sure he does. I can I ask where you were today? Lizzy told me you're normal here in the afternoons."

Billy wanted to hit him, Frank was going to scare her off, "oh, I didn't want to intrude, I'm sure you two have so much to talk about."

Billy could hear a chair moving then Hazel's hand appeared in his free one, it was a strange sensation, she always sat on his left side.

"So Hazel, tell me about yourself." Billy understood where Frank was coming from but it didn't stop him from wanting to kick the shit out of him.

Hazel felt like Frank was trying to look into her soul, "there's not much to tell, I work in the peds ward which is just through the door and across the sky bridge, I live in Hell's kitchen and I have a fish named Barry."

"Why not work at Mercy if you live in Hell's Kitchen?" Billy was growing worried that Hazel would feel like Frank was judging her.

"I work with kids, Mercy's peds ward is pretty basic, plus I have some qualifications that fit better here."

Billy could tell Hazel didn't like where this was going, there was something in her tone that worried him, "I don't mean to be rude because you've done a lot for Bill but why did you want to help him?"

Hazel's hand left him and Billy felt powerless to do anything, "I met Billy on my first day in the city. Without his help, I would have spent the whole day lost. I never got the chance to thank him."

"So you did all this just for a few minutes of his time two years ago." Frank realised his slipup far too late

Billy felt the change in the air, "wait, how did you know it was two years ago?" Billy's thoughts were racing, the last thing he needed was for Hazel to be scared of him, where the fuck was Curt? He would have handled this so much better. "it was nice meeting you, Mr Castle but I think I better head back to work. I'm sure I can see Billy some time tomorrow."

Billy could tell she was scared and doing her best to hide it, he hoped to God Frank understood his as he clenched his hand and let go. Frank's chuckle filled the air, "that right Bill?" He did it again, "stay please. I'm sorry, you gotta see where I'm coming from?"

The tension faded from Billy's body and her warmth returned to his hand, "of course. It doesn't take a genius to know that Billy has a lot of money and you don't want someone you don't know taking advantage of your friend. I'm telling the truth when I say that all I want is to repay his kindness."

She sounded sad, Billy hated it, "that's all I wanted to hear. I probably wasn't the best person to do this, Curt's much better at the people thing than I am."

Hazel laughed, "yeah, I thought I was about to get yelled at. No offence."

Billy could feel the tension leave the room as they both relaxed, "none taken. Bill wants you to stay and so I do, plus you still gotta meet everyone else."

Hazel let out a nervous giggle, "Billy have me the rundown on everyone, Karen's your partner and Curt's your friend. There's also Matt and Foggy, and David and his family am I right?"

Frank nodded, "yeah, that's about it. We'll have to get you over to Avnil too, some of the guys want to thank you for all you've done."

Billy squeezed Frank's hand, hoping it was hard enough to hurt him just a little and Frank huffed, "you can't keep her all to yourself Bill."

If Billy could punch him, he would. "When do you need to do back to your shift?"

Hazel's absence didn't seem so bad now that he knew she was going to keep coming back, "twenty minutes but I'll be back at around six for my two hours with him."

"That's great, Curt and Karen will be here when they get off work. They can't wait to meet you."

Billy was suddenly unbelievably tired, the anxiety and fear fading to exhaustion, "the feeling is mutual."

When Billy came to again, he could hear more voices, all filled with affection.

"How did you manage to work out talking to him in Morse code?" Of course, Karen would ask that.

"It was all Billy, I was just there to catch it." Billy wanted to chastise her, she was the one who gave him the time of day and her faith, he wouldn't have been able to do it all by himself.

"We'll have to have you over for dinner, Sarah's been insisting that we should at least bring you lunch the moment the hospital reopen." He hoped Curt would be more subtle but he knew how it would go with the others, Frank would grunt out a request and Karen would give a demand that sounded like an invitation.

"Thank you for the offer but I couldn't possibly intrude. Maybe when Billy is up and moving around, we can revisit it." Hazel sounded a little taken aback.

"Of course, but I'm sure Billy's going to be more insistent than us." Billy was glad Curt didn't push it, he was smart enough to know that things couldn't get too personal or the ethics board was going to start pocking around, he had a plan for that but now wasn't the time.

Billy wasn't upset when the chime came, "Sadly, I have to head home but I'll be back tomorrow."

Hazel's hand left his, "you can't stay?"

Billy wanted to laugh, he knew Frank would warm to her quickly, "no, I can't stay on hospital grounds any longer," she paused, "I can rearrange my day tomorrow so we can talk more if you like?"

"Sounds good, we'll see you tomorrow."

Billy didn't know how to put his feelings into words, but he had a new mission, open his eyes and say hello.

Part 3

[alirhi]

10 Sebastian roles as boyfriends

Because... I'm bored and I feel like it. 😂 Probably some spoilers for, like... everything? So yeah... That.

Putting it under here for easy scrolling:

10: Chase Collins

Who doesn't love a goofball? In the first half of the movie, Chase is basically perfect. He's sweet, funny, not all caught up in his ego, and actually pays attention to what the girls around him are saying, not just to what he wants to hear. If not for the whole... it was all an act to get close to Caleb and try to steal his magic thing, Chase would actually be a damn good high school boyfriend. He's adorable and would be a fun date, but he's also only 18 so best not to start making long-term plans lol. Also, y'know... the whole psycho revenge/power grab thing.

9 Jack Benjamin

Y'all. Y'all. Words cannot describe how much I love Jack. Pretty sure I've made this clear. As a person/character in general, he's absolutely in my Top 3 - not just of Sebastian's characters, but any character ever. ❤ But as a boyfriend? Boy's got baggage. It's what makes me so protective of him, but seeing as how he's trapped in the closet thanks to his overbearing homophobic family and the insane expectations heaped on him, as the show left him, he can't handle an honest relationship. He's too easily influenced by all the wrong people, poor babe.

8 Chris (Destroyer)

On paper, undercover cop sounds cool and exciting, but even if you ignore the fact that he, y'know, dies... Chris got in too deep and kinda lost the mission, so to speak. Best case scenario, you're his sexy partner and in on it all with him and end up on the lam for the rest of your lives. Worst case, this man lies for a living, so can you even trust him? And... yeah. The whole dead thing. Chris is hot af but getting involved with him is a recipe for disaster.

7 Ben

Min and Hathor have mercy, I love Ben! He's smart, he's snarky, he's caring and loyal... he's an absolute disaster. He's another one who seems allergic to honesty, until his lying and avoiding nearly kill his girlfriend. Not exactly relationship goals lol. Everything before totally was, though! Ben's adorable, and I love how he stayed up all night to protect his girlfriend (from a ghost/demon thing... with a baseball bat. I said he was smart, not perfect, okay? XD points for effort lol)

6 Mickey Henry

I. LOVE. MICKEY. Oml I love Mickey. He's a spazz and - even more so than Ben - an absolute disaster of a human being, but I love him. Pros for dating Mickey Henry: he's fun, he's carefree, he'll cook for you even though he's kinda bad at it lol, he loves his son and wants to be a good dad, he wants his partner to be happy and to love life as much as he does. Cons, and the reason he's not higher on the list: He's a pushover; easily influenced by the toxic people in his life, and it gets him into a lot of trouble. Being easily influenced by toxic dumpster fire of a human being Chloe almost lost him the partial custody of his son that he barely even had. He's an absolute sweetheart, but he's a complete man-child, and dating him would often feel more like raising him.

5 Frank "Suffer Buddy"

Come on! You know he and Mickey had to be back-to-back - they're practically the same character! 😂 Frank is Mickey... slightly more grown up. He's still a disaster, but he's respectful of boundaries, he's caring, he's funny in a dry, witty way that I just adore, and hoo lordy that man is a giver! 🥴🥵 Honestly, if he didn't smoke and didn't ditch Daphne in the middle of a party hours away from everything familiar to her surrounded by strangers to go do drugs, I'd call Frank perfect. He listened, he respected her wishes, he tried to keep some distance between them when he found out she'd gone on a date with his best friend (it failed utterly and brought us to the "damn that man's good with his mouth" portion of the movie lmao but still)... I don't have a whole lot of experience with men who actually give a shit, okay? So Frank is like a goddamn unicorn to me lmao. But that drug thing... That keeps him at the bottom of the Top 5 for me. Sorry, bb

4 Bucky

I can already hear everyone on here raging at me for placing Bucky so low on this list, but hear me out: I love this man. I love all four iterations of this man. Flirty 40s Bucky was a doll (fun date, not commitment material). Post-POW camp 40s Bucky had a fire to him that set me on fire. The Winter Soldier can choke me any damn day. Unf. And TFATWS Bucky... Oh, lady above, 2023 Bucky is a gem! He's sweet, snarky, and broken. He feels utterly, wretchedly alone in the world, and everyone around him, including his only friend, is telling him to "man up" and "make amends" for shit that was never his fault to begin with, rather than helping him come to terms with all that he's suffered and all that he's survived. Bucky needs and deserves love. A relationship with him would be so solid, if he found the right person... But it would take a fuck ton of work. He needs someone strong, patient, and more stubborn than he is to prod him until he finds a better therapist and actually opens up, and to keep him on track because even good therapy comes with homework. He does have to "do the work," Sam was right about that much, but he was way off base with what that "work" is. Bucky needs help and understanding, and he would be an amazing boyfriend... if he found someone with the strength to help him weather his nightmares and flashbacks, and help pull him out of this PTSD pit he's been in since 1943.

3 Chris Beck

Big brains turn me on, okay? 😂This man is an astronaut and a surgeon! Yes, please! Come here, you sexy genius! He's smart, he's funny - pretty sure Sebastian is incapable of playing anyone who's not delightfully snarky lol. He's pragmatic when he needs to be but there's also nothing he wouldn't do or risk for the ones he loves. This man is husband material and I cannot be convinced otherwise! So why isn't he #1? Cuz of the whole... spending years in space, thing. Super cool job and I'd be his biggest fan on the ground, but god damn, I would miss him while he's away!

2 TJ Hammond

Look, I'm gender fluid and he's a little bit bi 😂😂😂 Let me have my fantasy, okay? TJ's definitely got a lot of shit to work through, but love brings out the best in him. Before that fucking closeted shitbag broke his heart and stomped on it for good measure, TJ was clean and sober for months, he was happy, he was playing piano again, he was pulling himself together. Not only would he be an amazing boyfriend, but his partner would get the extra joy of getting to watch their love and devotion to him be the thing that saves this beautiful man's life. It's not healthy overall to tie your self worth and will to live to a relationship, but if he found the right person who would be there for him through all of life's shit and stick it out, I think he'd be okay. Even after his lowest point and without the support of his family, TJ still had a dream and he still chased it. He's not just the sweetest person to ever grace our screens, but he's ambitious and business-savvy, too. Keep him off drugs and watch this man take over the world, I'm telling you!

So why is TJ only #2? Well, besides the fact that he's like 99% gay and I have no bits he'd be interested in lmao, there's also the fact that this guy owns my heart:

1 Will Franklyn

And not just because we get to see him wet and mostly naked lol. Will is fucking perfect. I would die for this man... because he's already shown that he would die for his love. He almost fucking did, and they weren't even together yet! He's smart and very aware, he's a writer so we'd get to bond/geek out over books together, he's not all full of himself (self-deprecating humor ftw!) and he's willing to help a total stranger despite actual mortal peril, just because it's the right thing to do. Fierce, intelligent, sassy, strong-willed, and a flawless moral compass? YESYESYESYESYES! Forget boyfriend - let me MARRY this man! 😍🥰