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silverlightqueen · 6 years ago

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Ruin My Life

Based on Ruin My Life by Zara Larsson

RML masterlist

(fratboy!Jimin bc I’m a slut for douchey Jimin🤷🏽‍♀️) - smut, flirty banter, angst and fluff to come

Word Count - 8.7k+

Summary - After an eventful afternoon in the library and an unexpected reunion, you end up sending a text that you might regret...

Warnings - v v smutty!!! dom!Jimin, daddy kink, oral, dirty talking, intercourse, spanking, thigh riding, a lil bit of everything ig

a/n: so this went in a very different direction than I intended it to when I started writing it lol, but I actually like the plot twist so here ya go. also, this is definitely going to be a series and hopefully I’ll be uploading part 2 very soon bc I've already started on it lmao. Please tell me what y’all think, I’d love to get some feedback💕

Edit: Part 2 is out now, link in my masterlist💕

I love university. Everything about it. My course is super interesting and there’s never a moment when I think I’d rather be doing a different course. My lecturers are super cool and understanding, all of them young, so they know what we’re going through, and considerate. My friends and roommate are all amazing people and they’ll never give me a chance to be sad or bored, always on hand to cheer me up and take me out. The parties are always so much fun and I’m lucky enough to have never had a bad experience with a drunk and horny boy, or a group of bitchy girls. So yes, unlike some others around here, I love university with my whole heart and soul. I’m one of those annoying people who shows up to early morning lectures with a coordinated and pristine outfit, a full face of makeup and perfect hair, my laptop and matching stationery ready, as well as a Starbucks and breakfast. I wake up happy in the mornings and go to sleep happy at night. And this isn’t one of those stories where I’m going to rattle on about how much I love university and then say that there’s one exception to the rule. No, definitely not. This is a slightly different story. Because I was pondering how much I love university whilst sat at a desk in the library, book in hand, both headphones in, just as something happened which would cause a chain of events which would in turn change my view on my university for the rest of my life. Maybe even ruin my life as it is, for better and for worse.

Someone leans against the desk beside me and pulls out one headphone, Drake being cut off mid-rap, and I look up, expecting it to be my roommate, Mija, or one of my other friends, but instead, it’s a surprise, and not exactly a nice one. ‘Hello, darling,’ Kim Taehyung says, looking down at me with a small smirk. He’s dressed in the school’s football kit, shorts to his knees, and a loose t-shirt, and he holds his varsity jacket over his shoulder. I sigh, knowing that this probably won’t end well. ‘My name isn’t darling,’ I say quietly, but he reacts to the words like I shouted them in his face, flinching slightly. ‘Well, obviously, y/n,’ he chuckles, saying it with emphasis as a way to prove that he knows my name, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘Can I help you, Taehyung?’ I ask, putting my book down and leaning back in my seat, knowing he isn’t going to leave easily. ‘Yes, actually, babe. I wanted to ask something of you,’ he says, his jawline clenched once the words leave his mouth, and I roll my eyes. ‘Ask it then, and I’ll see if it’s worth my time,’ I say, and his lips quirk up in amusement.

Now, I feel like I should explain something. I’m not a bitch, okay? I’m super nice. I’m one of those girls that gets along with everyone, little kids, old people and everyone in between. I could get along with a brick wall if I had to. I’m sociable, kind and easy to talk to. But frat boys… frat boys are the one exception. I’m lucky enough to not have to see them most of the time, my schedule conflicting with theirs, and we don’t really run in the same social circles. But Taehyung and his friends, I’d been unfortunate enough to encounter them a few times more than I would ever want to. Not direct encounters, though. Through my friends, and their heartbreaks, one-night stands, rejections and short relationships with the boys. I’d had to wipe away their tears, console them and spend nights chatting shit about the boys more times that I can count. It had become tiring to say the least. So, please, forgive me for the way I’m speaking to Taehyung, because he deserves it.

‘Let me take you out?’ he asks, and my lips curl up into a grin. ‘Ah, you and your stupid friends are really not as funny as you seem to think you are. Is this a bet, or a dare? Or are you getting something for it? Money, maybe? If you are, I’ll say yes, and I get half,’ I say, and he looks surprised, trying to keep up with my words. ‘Wait, what? This isn’t a dare, and it’s not for money,’ he says, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘So, it’s a bet then?’ I ask, and he shakes his head hastily. ‘Can’t a guy ask a girl out for the sake of it?’ he asks, tilting his head in a way he must think is endearing. It is, to be honest, but I wouldn’t admit it to him in a million years; he already knows how intimidatingly handsome he is. ‘What makes you want to ask me out? What’s special about me?’ I challenge. ‘Of course you’re special, baby,’ he says, mistaking me trying to catch him out as insecurity. The way the words roll of his tongue with such ease tell me he’s said them many times before, and it makes me even more annoyed. ‘I know I’m special, dumbass, way too special to be dealing with this right now. I wanna know what you think is so special about me to ask me out,’ I explain exasperatedly. ‘You’re, like, clever, and stuff. And you’re pretty,’ he says with a grin, thinking he’s done well. ‘I’m clever, pretty, and stuff?’ I ask deadpan, and he nods proudly. ‘Wow, thanks!’ I say sarcastically, and then he seems to clock that I’m not too impressed with his observations. ‘To save myself from any more of the bullshit that has been nonstop exiting your mouth for the past minute, I’m going to ask you to leave now,’ I say, and I hear choked laughter from behind me. I don’t bother to turn and look, knowing that it’s probably his stupid friends, and continue staring at Taehyung, waiting for him to leave. ‘I’ll see you around, y/n,’ he grins, strutting away. I roll my eyes, putting my headphone back in and getting back to work, incorrect in thinking that that was the end of it. Only a few minutes later, and I have another visitor.

‘I guess my desk is the place to be this afternoon, huh?’ I ask as I pull out a headphone, looking up to see Hoseok smirking down at me, dressed in the same kit as Tae, his varsity jacket on instead. ‘It’s not because of the desk, though,’ he says, and I nearly laugh out loud. ‘Can I help you, Hobi? Because I have loads of work to do,’ I sigh tiredly. ‘Fuck the work, do me instead,’ he says with a grin, and I choke. ‘Wow, you’re… straightforward, I’ll give you that. But you do know that no girl with more than one braincell would ever be flattered or turned on after being spoken to like that?’ I reply with a raised eyebrow. ‘And you’ve got more than one braincell, have you, y/n?’ he asks, a mischievous grin playing at his lips. ‘Yes, more than can be said for you and your friends. Now whatever stupid game it is that you guys are playing, give it up and leave me alone. I’m busy,’ I say in annoyance. ‘Too busy for me? Don’t hurt me, y/n,’ he says, his mouth constantly stretched into that stupidly handsome smile. ‘Even if I’m watching paint dry, I’m still too busy for you,’ I say, and he clutches his heart dramatically. ‘How can you hurt me this way, babe?’ he says, and I roll my eyes. ‘Leave, Hobi, I’m not dealing with your stupidity anymore,’ I say, putting my headphone back in, not waiting to see if he’s left or not. I’m lucky to be left in peace for a few minutes, until another of their stupid friends bothers me.

‘Oh, this had better be good,’ I say, putting my book down again, looking up to see Jungkook smiling his annoyingly cute bunny smile at me, his jacket tied around his small waist. ‘Trust me, baby, if it’s to do with me, it will be,’ he says confidently, my eyebrow quirking up. ‘Arrogance? Not the best way to seduce a girl,’ I say. ‘Who says I’m trying to seduce you?’ he asks, trying not to grin, and I laugh. ‘Don’t be silly, Jeon.’ ‘Who’s the arrogant one now?’ he says, and I give an impressed nod. ‘Touché. So, what have you come over here to ask me to do? Are you gonna beat around the bush like Tae and ask me out on a date, or are you gonna get straight to the point like Hobi and tell me to do you?’ I ask, and I can see him try not to laugh. ‘How about I take you out and then you do me? Or rather, I do you?’ he suggests, and I nod as I digest his words, trying not to let the way his words affect me show. ‘What a… tempting offer. But no, thank you, I have much more important things to do,’ I say, and he pouts at me. ‘More important than me? I didn’t think it was possible,’ he says ponderingly, and I hold back a laugh. ‘God, you’re annoying. You must be insane if you think you have any importance in my life,’ I say, and he hisses, pretending to be hurt. ‘Ouch. Come on, noona, you know you find me attractive,’ he says, and I laugh aloud. ‘What’s the game? Is it a bet to see who can get me on a date?’ I ask, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘You’re clever,’ he says, revealing it straight away. ‘I am, but even someone with your IQ could figure that out after having three morons from the same friendship group come up to you in the space of twenty minutes,’ I say. ‘I’ll have you know my IQ is higher than average. 128, to be precise,’ he says, and I raise an eyebrow at his IQ being mere points off mine. ’28? Sounds about right,’ I say, and he laughs a genuine laugh. ‘You’re a funny girl, y/n. I’m actually genuinely asking you out now, not because of the dare,’ he says, and I grin, amused. ‘Maybe some other time, Kook, when I’m not so busy,’ I say, taking pity on the boy before scrawling down my number on a piece of paper. ‘Don’t hit me up if you want your dick sucked, that’s not what this is for. Send me your name so I have your number, and I’ll let you know when I’m free if I don’t change my mind,’ I say, and he grins victoriously as he takes it from me, the boys behind causing a ruckus. ‘Can I have a kiss for the road?’ he asks, a cheeky smile on his annoyingly cute face, and I laugh. ‘Run along, Jeon,’ I say, and he does so, leaving me laughing to myself.

Only a few minutes later, someone takes a seat opposite me, and I supress a sigh. ‘I’m not gonna fuck around like those kids, I’m gonna get straight to it. Let me take you out,’ Seokjin says once I’ve taken out a headphone, and I raise an eyebrow at his straightforward statement. ‘Well, what a way to woo a girl, Jin. God knows how you’ve managed to get so many girls into your bed,’ I say, and he gives me a smile, staggeringly handsome with his dark hair hanging over onto his forehead, his kit the same as the other boys. ‘I get into theirs, they don’t get into mine. Imagine the germs. I’d let you, though, babe,’ he smiles, and my heart jumps. ‘Thank you, I’m flattered, but I’d rather not step foot anywhere other than the downstairs of your frat house for as long as I live,’ I say, and he laughs his endearingly loud laugh, sounding distinctly like a windshield wiper. ‘I don’t mind coming to yours,’ he offers. ‘So you took that obvious rejection as an offer to come to my apartment? God, you frat boys really are dense, huh?’ I say, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘So you don’t want me?’ he asks. ‘No, Seokjin, I don’t.’ ‘You gave your number to Jungkook,’ he points out, and I raise an eyebrow. ‘He wore me down. And he’s cute, I guess,’ I admit, and Jin gives me a sceptical look. ‘So I’m not cute?’ ‘No, you aren’t cute, and you know that that’s not an appropriate word to describe you at all,’ I say, the subliminal message obvious to him. ‘So you find me attractive, then?’ he asks. ‘So is this about getting validation or about asking me out? Because it’s sure seeming like the former,’ I say. ‘I don’t need validation, babe, I know I’m handsome. I just want to know how you feel about me,’ he says, tilting his head to the side inquisitively. ‘I think you’re handsome, but I don’t have any kind of emotional or physical attraction to you in the slightest, Jin. My apologies but go find a girl who will fawn over you like you want her to,’ I say, and he laughs. ‘Fair enough, I gave it a try, I guess,’ he says, getting up. ‘And it was a good one at that,’ I say, taking pity on him, and putting a sympathetic hand on his forearm, and the boys start to pipe up behind me. ‘See you later, Y/N,’ he says, and I smile at him.

Next, I have someone filling the seat beside me, and I roll my eyes, knowing this stupid roleplay is unavoidable. ‘Hey, y/n,’ I hear once I’ve removed my headphone, and the voice brings a smile to my face. Perhaps the only one I actually like out of them all. ‘Hey, Joon,’ I say, with a wide smile, hearing the boys whispering once more. ‘I… I’m sorry, this is so dumb,’ he says with a shake of his head, and I laugh. ‘It’s okay. I guess it’s kind of brought me some entertainment for this afternoon,’ I say. ‘It was a stupid bet to see if any of us would actually be able to get you to agree to going out with us,’ he says. ‘Where did it come from though? Why did it even come up into conversation?’ I ask, curious, the handsome man rolling his eyes. ‘We were supposed to have a meeting with the Dean of the school in here, something about the frat, but she had to reschedule, and we ended up staying in here because we had nothing else to do. Then Tae spotted you, and asked when you got so hot, and I said you’ve always been hot, because you have, and then one thing led to another, and Tae bet he could get you to go out with him, so all the rest of us bet too, because we’re mindlessly competitive morons,’ he explains, and I crack up at his last few words. ‘Well,’ I say in a low voice, smiling gently as I lean closer to him and place a hand onto his chest for effect, ‘you can go back and tell them that I said I’d definitely go out with you, and I said I’d take you home too, because we really are due a catch-up, and we haven’t binged a series since freshman year.’ He grins at my physical deception to the boys, my words about reconnecting as friends conflicting greatly with my actions, and brushes a piece of hair behind my ear. ‘I’ll text you soon,’ he says, getting up, and I smile at him. ‘Please do,’ I say, the boys reacting far too loudly for the library.

And then I get another visitor ten minutes later. ‘I’m gonna cut to the chase. What’s it gonna take for you to give me your number just so I can shut the boys up?’ Yoongi asks me, and I let out a laugh. ‘You need to convince me,’ I reply as he takes the seat beside me. ‘What did Namjoon and Jungkook do? Did they bribe you?’ he asks, his big brown eyes dancing as he grins mischievously. ‘No, neither of them bribed me. They used their natural charm,’ I say, and he grimaces. ‘I don’t have any of that so would you take a bribe?’ he asks, and I laugh again. ‘You are charming, and witty,’ I say, and he raises his eyebrows. ‘Why does it sound like you’re trying to get my number?’ he asks, and again, he has me laughing, effortlessly funny. ‘Aw, Yoongi, you’re funny. But no, I don’t take bribes,’ I say, and he fake scowls. ‘Not money? Or food?’ he asks, and I contemplate this for a moment. ‘Yeah, probably,’ I say, and he grins the most adorable gummy smile I’ve seen in my life. ‘Okay, I’ll buy you takeout of your choice on any given night. Just text me and I’ll order it to your apartment,’ he says, and I consider his offer. ‘I’ll one-up you; I’m gonna have Joon over soon for a day of binge-watching Netflix. You can come too as long as you bring snacks and then order dinner,’ I bargain, and he nods, ‘Deal.’ ‘Perfect. Let me put my number in your phone and then text me later,’ I say, and he hands me his phone with a smug look at the boys. They let out outraged noises as I put my number in his phone, trying not to laugh as I see the librarian stomping over in their direction. ‘Thanks, y/n, you’re a real one,’ he says, and I grin, shaking my head as he walks away. But the last visitor I get, around twenty minutes later, is definitely the most… unwelcome.

‘Hey, princess. Long time, no see,’ he says after plucking out a headphone, and his voice sends a chill through me. Okay, so maybe I lied when I said I hadn’t directly encountered any of them. One of them may or may not be an ex-fuck buddy (I hate that phrase but it’s the best way to describe it, because we definitely weren’t friends with benefits). It’d been a low point in my university life, when I’d broken up with a long-term boyfriend and wanted to go crazy for a little, and I guess that’s what I ended up doing. Or rather, who I ended up doing. No one other than my roommate knows about our fling, as far as I’m aware, and it’d ended after a few months. We haven’t spoken since, and every time I’ve seen him in real life, I’ve practically run in the other direction to avoid him. It’s not that we ended on bad terms; it’s just… awkward. And now, here he is. Sat on the desk beside me, looking as handsome as ever in his football kit, his thick thighs and strong arms straining against the material, his varsity jacket tied low on his hips. He runs a hand through his newly dyed dirty blond locks, smirking as he watches my eyes travel over his body.

‘Hey, Jimin,’ I reply, not really knowing what else to say. ‘That’s not what you used to call me,’ he says with a smirk, looking down at me with sparkling eyes. ‘It’s what I called you when we were around other people,’ I point out, and he grins widely, his pearly whites out on display. ‘How have you been, princess? I’ve missed you,’ he pouts, and I roll my eyes, trying to act like his nickname for me doesn’t affect me in the slightest. ‘I really doubt that, Jimin. Did you even have enough time in your… busy schedule to miss me?’ I ask with a raised eyebrow, his grin becoming even wider. ‘Now, babe, don’t get jealous. You know that when I was with you, I was with only you, no one else. So, don’t act like the scorned woman,’ he reprimands me, running a hand through his hair again, and I roll my eyes once more. ‘What a privilege,’ I say sarcastically, and he shakes his head at me. ‘Look how you treat me. After everything we went through together,’ he says. ‘The only thing we went through together was a jumbo pack of condoms,’ I say, and he bursts out laughing. ‘I forgot how funny you are, babe,’ he says, and I try not to smile at seeing him look so happy. ‘Listen, don’t be mad at me for moving on. As much as I hate to bring it up, you’re the one that ended things with me, though only God knows why. We were good together, right?’ he asks, and I nod, knowing he’s right; we were. ‘So why did you end it?’ he asks, and I sigh. ‘Do you really wanna know, Jimin?’ I ask, and he nods, watching me interestedly. ‘Because I started to catch feelings for you,’ I admit, watching his face for any kind of reaction, but he doesn’t show any sign of emotion, his face not changing in the slightest. ‘And?’ he asks after a few seconds, hand sweeping through his hair again. ‘Two reasons. One, I’d just gotten out of a relationship, and wasn’t looking to get into another one. Two, you weren’t, and still aren’t, the type of guy to even want a relationship, so there was no point continuing what we had, because I would’ve fallen for you more and more, and it wouldn’t have gone anywhere,’ I say, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘Because you know me so well?’ he asks, and I nod with a small smile. ‘I knew you better than you thought I did,’ I say, and he nods, digesting my words.

‘Well, what do you say we give us a go again, Y/N?’ he asks seriously, and I nearly choke. ‘What, like… do what we used to do?’ I ask, and he nods with a small smile, running a hand through his hair. God, it’s so sexy when he does that. ‘Obviously. Not a relationship, you said it yourself, you know I’m not that guy. Unless you’re gonna go catching feelings again,’ he says, and I scoff. ‘Don’t flatter yourself. I’ve matured. Just as much as you’ve become more of a douche,’ I say, and he holds his chest in mock pain. ‘Ouch, princess, you really know how to hurt me, huh?’ he jokes, and I stick my tongue out at him. ‘Thanks for trying to pimp yourself out to me, Jimin, but no, thank you. I’ve passed that stage in my life,’ I say, putting on a snooty voice, and he pulls a face at me, scrunching up his nose adorably. ‘Come on, princess, for old times’ sake. Just one more time. Then I’ll leave you alone,’ he says, and I shake my head. ‘Can’t you go ask some naïve freshman who doesn’t know you well and will think she’s ‘oh-so special’?’ I say, and he laughs. ‘Princess, you were the naïve freshman at one point, remember?’ he says. ‘We were sophomores,’ I point out. ‘Regardless. Nothing like a one-last-time fuck, huh?’ he says, his casual way with words igniting something long forgotten inside me.

‘Go ask someone else, Jimin,’ I say, looking away from him, knowing if he doesn’t leave soon, I won’t be able to resist him much longer. ‘Don’t you understand, y/n? I’m asking you because I want it to be you. I don’t just want any old sex, I want good sex, and, as much as this is majorly wounding my pride to admit this to you, you are the best I’ve had,’ he says, his tone honest and shameless, and my eyes widen. ‘Seriously? I’m the best? Out of like the other 200 girls you’ve fucked?’ ‘Hey! Don’t downplay me, more like 300,’ he jokes, and I try to hold back a laugh. ‘You’re probably a walking STD,’ I say with a disgusted shake of my head, and he lets out a small laugh. ‘Fine, y/n, but you have my number still, right? You know where I am if you need me,’ he says, getting up. But he hesitates before leaving. ‘I really did mean it when I said I missed you, princess,’ he says, our eyes locked together as he runs a hand through his soft locks, and I look away, embarrassed. He leaves then, and all I can think is, I missed you too.

And it is that thought, resounding in my mind all afternoon, for the rest of my stay in the library, on my way home, during movie night with my roommate, that leads me to do what I nearly do. My fingers ghosting over the screen of my phone, hovering over the send button, I look up at the screen briefly. ‘I can’t believe the main character died already. Her death was so sad,’ my roommate, Mija, says. ‘I know,’ I reply half-heartedly, looking back at my phone. ‘You bitch! You really haven’t paid attention at all! The main character hasn’t died! And he’s a guy!’ she shouts, hitting me repeatedly with a pillow. ‘Ow, Mija! I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Just stop! Mija!’ I shriek, the other girl finally giving up. ‘Right, explain. Why have you been staring at your phone for the past hour?’ she asks. I give in instantly, telling her of the events of the library, specifically my conversation with Jimin, and she gives me the perfect reactions, gasping and laughing in all the right places. She really is the best person to tell stories to. Once I’m done, she stares at me. ‘What are you waiting for then?’ she asks, and I stare stupidly at her, confused. ‘What?’ ‘Message him, you idiot!’ ‘Oh! Yeah, but what if I catch feelings again? He basically said today that he is not up for a relationship,’ I say. ‘So, fuck him once last time, and be done with it,’ she says. ‘You think?’ I say. ‘I know! He told you you’re the best sex he’s ever had, you dumb bitch! For Park Jimin to say that, it must’ve been fucking good, so don’t let that opportunity go to waste,’ she says. ‘Okay, okay, stop cussing me out!’ I say in mock hurt, and she rolls her eyes. ‘Text him, you moron. I’m gonna go see our neighbours, and you’d better put on that brand-new Agent Provocateur set we bought together,’ she says threateningly, jumping up from the sofa and leaving in her pyjamas, phone and popcorn in hand, before I can even say anything. I grab my phone and send the text before I psych myself out. I quickly put my phone on speaker for once and then begin to clean up the living room. I get a text back around a minute later and I practically pounce at my phone. The text I see simultaneously makes me roll my eyes and smile, before I lock my phone and rush around tidying. Then I quickly slip out of my comfies and into a black lingerie set; bra, pants, suspenders, lace, sheer, straps, the whole shebang. I quickly tidy my room too, and then take a seat on the couch again, acting all calm and collected, flicking through the music channels on the TV impatiently.

Only sixteen minutes after I sent the text, I hear a knock at the door and wait until he knocks again before getting up to answer the door. I pull it open slightly, looking through the small gap, his dark eyes meeting mine. He looks positively delectable, dressed in a pair of light blue distressed jeans with rips that reveal strong thighs, and a white t-shirt with the word ‘Lovers’ printed across the front in black writing, a fitted black leather jacket over the top. A silver earring dangles from his left ear, a silver hoop in the other, and his hair is parted just slightly off-centre, a small strip of his forehead exposed. ‘I hate it when you leave me waiting. I nearly ran a guy over driving here, and this is what I get in return?’ he growls, only half-hearted annoyance behind the words, and I pull the door completely open, letting him in. ‘Wow,’ he says, stopping in his tracks in the doorway, his eyes raking over my body shamelessly, ‘all this for me, princess?’ I smile coyly, shy under his burning gaze, and brush a lock of hair behind my ear. ‘All for you, Jimin,’ I say, and he takes a step into the room, throwing the door closed with a thud.

He practically throws himself at me, his hands gripping at my waist as his lips find my neck. ‘Now, now, princess, that’s not what you call me when we’re alone, is it?’ he murmurs against my skin, the feel of him touching me again nearly making me melt in his arms. ‘No, daddy,’ I breathe out, and he exhales shakily, his lips pulling and biting at the tender skin below my jaw. ‘Fuck, it’s been so long,’ he whispers, his hands snaking around my thighs, pulling me upwards. I get the hint, jumping up and wrapping my legs around his waist, my actions a result of muscle memory, and he walks towards my bedroom, his lips still working on my neck. He kicks the door open, the loud noise making me jump, and he lets out a gentle laugh at my reaction, before he virtually throws me down onto the bed. He climbs over me, his toned body hovering over my smaller frame, and he stares down at me. ‘God, I’ve missed you,’ he whispers before pressing his lips to mine, our bodies fitting together perfectly.

He parts his lips and I follow suit, his tongue easily sliding into my mouth to meet mine, and the way our mouths work together in perfect harmony brings memories of long nights past rushing back. The hand that isn’t holding him up grazes up and down my side as my hands grip his back, feeling the soft leather against my skin. I tangle my fingers into his soft hair, the locks sliding between them like silk, and pull on it, feeling him groan into my mouth. Our kiss becomes more heated and passionate, all dancing tongues and clashing teeth. The taste of mint and something distinctly Jimin has me wanting more. I didn’t realise how much I missed the feeling of him, and I relish every moment that his hand digs into my waist and his mouth works against mine. I pull his plump lower lip between my teeth before running my tongue over it, and he groans again, the sound heavenly. He rolls us over, so I lay atop him, and both of his hands furiously explore my body, tracing the curves of my back, waist and hips, and gripping onto my ass tightly. My hands rest on either side of his face, our lips still attached, my hair falling around us like a curtain. ‘Princess,’ he breathes out against my lips, and I pull away by a millimetre, our noses touching, the tiniest distance between our lips. ‘As much as I’m enjoying catching up, I’m getting impatient,’ Jimin says, grinding up against me, the hardening bulge in his tight jeans brushing against my stomach, and I let out a tiny whimper. ‘You like the feel of that, princess? I’m so hard, just for you,’ he whispers against my ear, grinding up against me again. I try to palm him through his jeans, and he slaps my hand away instantly, a dark glint appearing in his eyes.

‘Off,’ he instructs, and I climb off him, watching as he sits up, moving to the edge of the bed, his feet planted firmly on the floor. He pats his lap and I already know what’s coming. ‘Why, daddy? Haven’t I been a good girl?’ I ask, pouting at him with big eyes, and he lets out a harsh laugh, repeating the action again. I reluctantly bend over his lap, my ass up in the air, as he chuckles. ‘Good girl? You think you’ve been a good girl?’ he asks, and I nod. His hand lands on my ass without any warning, the slap hard and stinging, and I supress the yelp that nearly leaves my mouth, knowing it’ll only get me more. ‘That is for not replying to any of my texts or calls,’ he spits out before his hand lands another slap on my ass, even harder this time. ‘That is for avoiding me around campus and at parties.’ Another slap, painfully harsh, bringing tears to my eyes, slick beginning to pool in my black lace pants. ‘That is for flirting with all my friends at said parties, where you knew I could see you.’ Another slap, harsher again, causing me to lurch forward on his lap. ‘That is for giving Jungkook, Namjoon and Yoongi your number.’ ‘Namjoon already had my number!’ I say indignantly, and he slaps my ass harder than any of the previous slaps, causing the tears to spill over, my cheeks stinging and red. I’ll probably have bruises the shape of his hand tomorrow. ‘You never know when to keep your mouth shut, princess,’ he says, his hand landing against my ass again, a loud clap resounding against the room, and I can feel heat rushing to my core. ‘And that one is for how you’ve gotten even sexier over the past two years,’ he says before pulling me up off his lap and pushing me back down onto the bed.

He hovers over me again, pressing his lips against where the tears spilled over onto my face. ‘You are a good girl for me, princess. You always take your punishments so well. I just missed leaving bruises on this perfect ass,’ he murmurs against my face, his kind words making my heart warm. ‘Thank you, daddy,’ I whisper in reply, feeling him tense against me. ‘Such a good girl. My princess deserves a reward, right? You deserve a reward, don’t you, baby girl?’ he asks, and I nod, my bottom lip between my teeth. He ducks his head suddenly, his lips appearing at my jaw, slowly travelling down my neck to my collarbones, leaving blooming bruises in his wake, wanting to mark me as his. When he reaches the black lace of my bra, he lets out a deep breath. ‘You look so sexy in this,’ he says, looking up at me through his dirty blond locks. ‘Don’t rip it off, please, daddy, it was expensive,’ I say gently, and he chuckles. ‘I’ll buy you a new one, princess,’ he says, and I pout at him, not wanting it to go to waste after only wearing it once. ‘Fine,’ he huffs in mock annoyance, his hands snaking under my torso to unclip the clasp of my bra expertly. He pulls it off me, throwing it over his shoulder, and I shiver at the cold air hitting my newly exposed breasts, my nipples already hardening. Jimin exhales deeply, his breath hitting my chest, and I whimper at the feeling, watching him grin before ducking his head to wrap his lips around one nipple. His hand tugs and toys with the other nipple whilst his mouth pulls and sucks on the first, the sensations making me whine. I wrap my hands into his hair as he moves his mouth the other nipple, doing the same, making me numb. He moves further down my body, his lips pressing kisses down my stomach until he reaches the hem of my pants. With a roll of his eyes, he pulls my pants swiftly down my legs rather than ripping them off me like he used to, discarding them on the floor too, leaving me completely naked beneath him. ‘So fucking beautiful,’ he whispers, spreading my legs slowly.

‘God, I forgot how wet you get. Has anyone else managed to get you this wet, princess?’ he asks, and the question embarrasses me. The truth is that no one has. No one has ever pleased me the way Jimin used to. He grew to know my body well, knowing exactly what got me going and what I liked. It’s slightly humiliating how quickly Jimin can get me to my climax. ‘I asked you a question, princess. Has anyone else gotten you this wet?’ he asks, teeth gritted, fingers pressing into my waist. Jimin is all about validation, I’ve learned to realise. Praising him makes him feel fantastic, and when he feels fantastic, he makes me feel fantastic. ‘No, daddy, only you,’ I reply, a grin splitting his face before he ducks between my legs. He blows hot air out over my core, and I let out a small whimper. ‘Please, daddy,’ I say, unable to stop the words slipping out of my mouth, and ready myself for a reprimanding. ‘So needy, princess,’ he chuckles, surprising me by fulfilling my wishes, licking a stripe across my slit. ‘Tastes so good, princess,’ he praises as I let out a small moan, my feet curling up against the soft sheets. He licks at my core slowly, tongue lapping up my slit languorously, dipping his muscle in between my folds every few seconds, the process sending mind-numbing shocks through me. Without warning, he attaches his lips to my clit, sucking and tugging on the bundle of nerves, and I throw my head back onto the pillow, my back arching up. ‘Stay still, princess,’ he warns me, the vibration of his words against my heat having me shivering as one arm comes up to hold my hips down against the bed. His other hand comes up to between my legs and he slowly pushes one finger into my core, working his way in. ‘So tight, baby girl, am I not turning you on enough?’ he asks, and I know this question’s rhetorical, moaning out as he plunges another finger in, trying to open me up a little more. ‘I’m not gonna get my cock in at this rate, princess,’ he says, still with his lips wrapped around my clit, his two fingers slowly pumping in and out of me.

He gradually increases his pace, adding another finger in after a few moments, his mouth still working wonders at my clit. After a while, I can feel my orgasm building up, the moans falling more frequently from my mouth, Jimin only increasing his pace more and more, until his fingers pump in and out furiously fast, his tongue licking up and down my slit before pulling on my clit with his lips. My hands, threaded into his soft locks, pull him closer and closer to my core, and I can feel myself fast approaching the edge. He curls his fingers inside me, hitting that a particular spot, and I let out a loud whine. ‘Shit, Jimin, right there,’ I moan, and he stops his movements. I look down at him, already feeling my orgasm diminishing, and he stares back harshly. ‘What did you call me, princess?’ he asks sternly, and I pout. ‘Sorry, daddy, I forgot. It just felt so good,’ I reply, and a tender smile slips onto his face. ‘It’s okay, baby girl, you can say my name if you want,’ he allows before he goes back to his previous ministrations, and I feel myself tumbling towards the edge. ‘Come on, princess, you’re so close,’ he whispers, and I finally reach my orgasm when he curls his fingers and pulls on my clit at the exact same moment. ‘Fuck, Jimin!’ I cry out, back arching off the bed as my release washes over me.

Once I’ve come down from my high, Jimin licks up my release before he climbs off me, standing up beside the bed. He holds out his fingers to me, and I open my mouth, tasting myself on his digits, licking them clean. He slips off his socks and shoes as I take deep breaths, recovering, and he watches me fondly. Shakily, I push myself up, kneeling at the edge of the bed to help him undress. He shrugs off his jacket and then pulls his t-shirt over his head, throwing it onto the floor as I unbutton his jeans, tugging them down his legs, leaving him in a pair of plain black boxers, his bulge straining against the material. He watches as I run my hands over his chest, the muscles more prominent than they used to be, his skin more tanned now too. I bring my lips up to his collarbone, kissing and sucking to leave a mark of my own, threading my hands into the hair at the nape of his neck. ‘Princess, as much as I’m enjoying this, I really need you,’ he says breathlessly, obviously trying not to let out any noises, and I pull away from his skin. ‘Okay, daddy,’ I reply, pulling his boxers down just enough to let his hard length spring up against his stomach. He’s longer than I remember, thicker too, and his head is painfully swollen, the tip leaking precum. My mouth waters at the sight. I press a kiss to his tip, my tongue sliding out between my lips to lick up his precum, and he lets out an audible breath. I move back, spitting on my hands and running them up and down his length slowly, Jimin’s hands coming to gather up my hair and hold it back. I place my tongue at the base, licking up to his tip against the vein on the underside of his cock, feeling him tense as I do so. I take his head into my mouth, swirling my tongue around him, my hands rubbing him slowly. I look up at him through my lashes as I take him further into my mouth, feeling him hit the back of my throat, and his head falls back, a moan falling from his lips, the sound rushing straight to my core.

I build up my pace, steadily bobbing my head up and down, taking him as far in as I can, trying not to gag around him. ‘Fuck, princess, your mouth feels so good around my cock,’ he groans, saliva dripping down my chin and my eyes watering, not to mention the pain from how hard he’s tugging on my hair, but hearing the moans from him makes it all worth it. Just as I manage to adjust to him in my mouth, nearly backing down my throat, he becomes impatient. He begins thrusting into my mouth, controlling my head movements with the hand he has fisted in my hair, and all I can do is grab onto the back of his thighs as he fucks my mouth. ‘Ah, you’re such a good girl, princess. You make daddy feel so good, y/n. Taking my cock so well,’ he groans, and I moan at his words, the vibrations only making him thrust faster. The tears stream down my face, saliva now dripping all the way down my neck and chest, and I begin rubbing at my clit, already wet again. His thrusts into my mouth become messier and I know he’s nearing his edge, the moans and groans of my name becoming more and more frequent. I feel his cock twitch inside my mouth, ready for the hot cum that hits the back of my throat. ‘Shit, y/n,’ he moans, his head thrown back as he continues thrusting into me, filling my mouth with his release. Once he’s done, he pulls out of my mouth, his cum mingling with my saliva.

He looks down at me, my hair a tangled mess, my eyes streaming, spit and cum dripping down my face, fingers rubbing at my clit. I look up at him, hair pasted to his forehead with perspiration, chest heaving, lips swollen and shining. I swallow down what’s in my mouth as he collects up the liquid from my face and neck, his fingers entering my mouth. I lick them clean of all release again, still rubbing at myself, and I moan around his fingers, watching his eyes darken. ‘Already turned on, princess? You only orgasmed a few minutes ago! You always have been a greedy girl,’ he scolds, moving my pillows out of the way and sitting at the top of the bed, resting his back against the headboard. He pulls me up towards him and I think he’s going to want me to ride him, so when I try to straddle him, he shakes his head with a chuckle. He lifts me up and puts me down on his leg, my legs straddling his thigh, and he holds onto my waist. ‘You want me to ride your thigh, daddy?’ I ask gently, looking at him through my lashes, and he nods with a low groan, leaning forward to press his lips to mine. I can taste myself in his mouth, and I know it’s the same for him, our tongues and teeth clashing as his hands trail down to my ass, giving it a light slap before gripping it tightly. He flexes his thigh beneath my heat and I moan into his mouth, feeling him grin against mine before pulling away.

I begin grinding down on his strong thigh, holding on to his shoulders for support, and his mouth comes to my breasts. He begins licking and sucking on my nipples again and the feeling distracts me. It’s only after a little while that we both realised that I’ve stopped, and he flexes his thigh beneath me. ‘Jimin!’ I cry out, my head falling back as a result of the pleasure coursing through my veins, and he smirks. ‘Move, princess,’ he commands, and I slowly begin rocking down onto his bare thigh, the friction against my heat making me moan, Jimin watching me intently. ‘God, I can feel how wet you are. Gushing all over my thigh, princess. Such a dirty girl,’ Jimin breathes out, eyes on me as I grind down on his thigh. He grabs onto my waist, increasing my pace, and I moan out his name, the motion sending my mind into overdrive. ‘Look at you, grinding on my thigh like that, so beautiful,’ he groans out, licking his lips. Jimin’s eyes don’t leave me for a second and I know exactly what’s running through his mind; smugness and desire at the sight of me getting myself off on his thigh. ‘Fuck, Jimin, you feel so good, daddy,’ I whimper, looking down at his thigh to see it coated with my slick. ‘Be a good girl, y/n, work hard on daddy’s thigh, and I might just fuck you senseless afterwards,’ he whispers, and I let out a moan at his dirty words, a reminder of how vast and vibrant his vocabulary used to be. His length is already hard again, precum leaking from the tip, and I swipe a finger to collect it all up. The action catches him off-guard and he moans out, his head falling back and his thigh flexing, causing me to moan out his name. ‘Come on, princess, I know you’re near,’ Jimin urges, flexing and bucking up his thigh, the moans falling from my lips in rapid succession as I hurtle towards my climax. My orgasm finally washes over me and my back arches before I fall forward, my head buried in his neck, his scent of an expensive aftershave that I recognise from two years ago, his fresh soap and, again, something that just belongs to him, and him only, just something Jimin, floods my senses. He continues rocking me on his thigh until I’ve come down from my high.

‘I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful than the sight of you cumming on my thigh, princess. I wish I could imprint it in my mind,’ Jimin breathes out, lifting me off his thigh and laying me down on the bed, hovering over me. ‘Do you still keep your condoms in the same place?’ he asks, eyes flitting over to my bedside drawers, and I smile up at him. ‘I’m on the pill,’ I say, and he raises an eyebrow. ‘You’ve always been on the pill. Doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take precautions. I don’t want you pregnant,’ he says, and I roll my eyes. ‘Yes, I keep them in the same place,’ I sigh, and he grins, reaching over to the drawer and pulling one out. He hands it to me, shutting the drawer as I rip it open, sliding the rubber onto his length gently, hearing him hiss at the feeling. ‘Ready?’ he asks as I wrap my legs around his waist, and I nod, ‘Yes, daddy.’ He plunges into me, filling me up to the hilt, and my head drops back on to the pillow, Jimin’s head falling onto my shoulder. ‘Fuck, you’re so tight, princess, why don’t you ever loosen up? I won’t be able to last long,’ he groans, and I know it’s a lie, knowing Jimin will keep going for as long as it takes me to cum before he does, his stamina something inhuman. ‘Can I move?’ he asks. ‘Please, daddy,’ I moan, and he pulls all the way out, leaving me empty, before he slams all the way back in, hips snapping up against mine. ‘Fuck, daddy, you feel so good,’ I moan out, and he groans, setting a steady pace, his hips rocking up to meet mine. ‘Deeper, Jimin, harder,’ I moan and, after a few more thrusts, he gets impatient and unhooks one of my legs from around his waist, moving it to stretch up over his shoulder instead, slamming into me harder. ‘Daddy, oh, god, yes!’ I scream as he goes deeper than I thought possible, leaving me feeling completely and utterly full. He slams into me again and again, hitting the spongy spot deep inside me repeatedly, having me screaming. ‘Yes, fuck, Jimin, feels so good!’ I cry out as he begins rubbing at my clit. ‘That’s it, princess, scream my name. Let everyone know who’s making you feel so good,’ he urges, groaning and grunting as he thrusts into me at a fast pace, his thumb rubbing furiously at my clit. ‘Jimin, fuck!’ I scream out, my orgasm washing over me without a single ounce of warning from my body, having me quivering and convulsing under him. ‘Ah, fuck, princess, I’m gonna cum, fuck!’ Jimin moans, his thrusts slowing completely as he cums into the condom, his fingers still working on my clit. ‘Stop, Jimin,’ I say, slapping his hand away when the overstimulation kicks in.

Obligingly, Jimin pulls out of me, standing up and pulling off his condom, throwing it into the bin in the corner of my room. I slowly rise up from the bed, shakily walking over to my bathroom to go for a wee (no UTIs here, thank you very much), and when I go back into my room, Jimin’s redressing, beginning to pull his jeans on. ‘What are you doing?’ I ask, and he looks at me dumbfounded. ‘Um, I’m getting dressed,’ he says, his tone indicating how obvious it is. ‘I know that, I mean why,’ I say impatiently. ‘So I don’t show up to the frat house naked,’ he says in the same tone, and I roll my eyes. ‘Stay the night. It’s late, why would you go back home now?’ I ask, and he grins at me. ‘You sure, princess?’ he asks, and I nod exasperatedly. ‘Don’t make me regret offering,’ I say, picking up his t-shirt from the floor and pulling it on before grabbing a clean pair of pants from my wardrobe, pulling those on to. When I turn to face Jimin again, he’s lying in the bed, just in his boxers, watching me with a small smile. ‘You look so good in that shirt,’ he compliments as I climb into the bed beside him, taking a sip from the bottle of water sat on my windowsill. ‘How do you want me?’ I ask, and he smirks at me. ‘Another round already, princess?’ he asks, and I sigh tiredly. ‘You know what I mean,’ I say, and he chuckles. ‘I wanna spoon you,’ he says shamelessly, and I turn away from him, lying down. He lies down beside me, snaking his arms around my waist and pulling me closer to him so my back presses against his chest, my head tucked beneath his chin. ‘Goodnight, princess,’ he says tiredly. ‘Goodnight, Jimin,’ I reply, already drifting off to sleep, feeling so safe and comfortable in his arms.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts smut #bts jimin #jimin #park jimin #bts au #jimin smut #park jimin smut #jimin fanfic #jimin fanfiction

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an-oath · 6 years ago

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End Credits.

I was 17 when I left Windsor. I was a bright, blurry eyed tweeny adult that was looking forward to her future in...Texas. That’s right. I moved to Texas. When I left, I never said a proper “goodbye” to Windsor. I just hopped in that navy van and stared at the starry flag until my year was over and then I found myself with a new future. And boy was I excited to have a new plan! A new future in... Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario. I joined my parents and my brother and lived out a great few years of working and having fun until I decided to go to school. I took a Graphic Design course and graduated and then I was officially an adult? (unclear). So COOL! New future. Graphic Designer. Yes. Let’s go. I had an awesome job. It was so fun, and cool and bright. My boss was my best friend (literally) and my job was what I lived for...but I wanted experience. I wanted to live out my new “designery” future. So I started hunting out options. Then I had an idea! I could volunteer for awhile, get some experience and see what happens next. So, sooner or later I found myself packing up my great job, saying goodbye to my newly expanded family and watching Sault Ste. Marie blur in my rearview. I mean, I was excited. I was starting a new future of GRAPHIC DESIGN in... Windsor. So that was the full circle. Literally, around the country and back to be here. Today. 5 Years later almost to the day. Anticipating a great conversation between me and you....but I don’t know how to have this conversation again because i’ve had it with myself so many times before. As of September 22, 2019, I will be saying goodbye to Windsor, again and saying hello to Sault Ste. Marie, On. (Look it up if you’ve never heard of it - honestly, it’s the most beautiful city ). I’m learning as I get “older” that timing and seasons are a very real thing. There was a season for snow and a season for sun - if the snow was around when the sun should be there would most definitely be a season of chaos. If I didn’t have these seasons in my world I would be a very confused person. These last 5 years have offered me a great number of life lessons. I learned how to change my own headlight and take my car for an oil change. I learned that it’s important to ask for help when necessary and that I can’t do it all alone. I learned that I’m actually pretty good at what I do. I learned that I don’t love sand dunes as much as you would expect. There’s been a lot. A good long list. Because honestly, a lot has happened to me in these past 5 years. I’ve had my heart broken, I’ve had resurfaced friendships restored, I became an aunty again for the 3rd time. I went to Africa! I can’t think of a lot of other things but I did it - believe me. Now, I sit here reminiscing and wondering if moving to Windsor was a mistake? Should I have left, should I have just stayed where I was at my golden job with my northern views? But I think that’s wrong. I think Windsor was everything I needed to grow up and become someone that knows (kind of) what she wants in life. WCF has a lot to do with that. I’m expecting that you’ll hear some versions of my story from people. There’s a lot of people here and sometimes things can get twisted around. If you want to hear my story, the real story, talk to me or someone that knows (loves) me. I want to start this off by saying that my feelings towards WCF and the leadership have been nothing but positive. They’ve given me an open door to discuss my fears, my hopes, my excitements and have given me wise counsel and encouragement throughout this journey of decision. They’ve been a great source of joy in my life and although I’m moving away, please don’t sum up my reasons for leaving with the letters, WCF. They’ve given me more than I could’ve ever asked for as an employer and a church home. Nobody’s perfect. Even churches, but WCF has always been and always will be my home away from home. I know that the timing of my departure could lean towards a rumour or two but I know in my heart where I stand with Pastor RJ, the leadership and everyone else here and I know that God’s given me a release to go. So with that, I sit here looking at these last 5 years. Thinking of all the things I’m walking away from. People that I’ve grown to love. People that have become a significant part of my universe. People that I can’t imagine living without. And I don’t plan on living without them...things are just going to be different now. And to be honest, that kind of scares me. The reason, the story, behind my decision making isn’t very long. It’s been a long process but the reasons behind it are simple and straight to the point. I’m leaving Windsor because it’s time for me to leave Windsor. Just like I left so many times before. I would never have become who I am without these experiences and I believe that God has plotted this all out from day 1. He knew I would evolve into this crazy nomadic twenty something searching out something great. When I get to the Sault, I know it’s not going to be diamonds and ice cream all the time. Things will be new for me. I’ll have to make new friends. I’ll have to find a new favourite restaurant. I’ll have to adjust to a new season of my life but I know that this whole journey has been so GOD its insane. And I think that my remaining time here will go by in the blink of an eye. Because time tends to do that. I can’t sit here and give you a million reasons or my pro/con list or all of the time of thought I’ve put into this - I wish I could so then you would truly understand me...but it’s okay if you don’t. I’m okay if you don’t. My plan from now until my departure is to say goodbye to Windsor this time. Take the time. Enjoy my world and the people in it. Hope for the best and just expect that if this is where God wants me to go that He’s already prepared the perfect spot for me to leave. I’m sad to leave my people. but I’m excited for what’s ahead. I can’t really describe the feelings in a more clearer way than that. I’ve been processing on this quote by Elisabeth Eliot for awhile now. And it feels so real for me and sums up my thoughts in the most eloquent way possible. “There is no ongoing spiritual life without this process of letting go. At the precise point where we refuse, growth stops. If we hold tightly to anything given to us, unwilling to let it go when the time comes to let it go or unwilling to allow it to be used as the Giver means it to be used, we stunt the growth of the soul. It is easy to make a mistake here, “If God gave it to me,” we say, “its mine. I can do what I want with it.” No. The truth is that it is ours to thank Him for and ours to offer back to Him, ours to relinquish, ours to lose, ours to let go of – if we want to find our true selves, if we want real life, if our hearts are set on glory.” ― Elisabeth Elliot So, pray for me if you think of me. Hug me if you see me. And hope with me that the best is only a month away. :) ps. If you are wondering, I will miss you greatly. <3

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goforwardgreenwriter-blog · 7 years ago

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The Worm Reads: Empire of Storms, Ch 71-72

These goddamn chapters are so long I want to d ie

The Queen of the Fae was exactly as Aelin remembered. Swirling dark robes, a beautiful pale face beneath onyx hair, red lips set in a faint smile

Of course Maeve is also drop dead gorgeous. Somebody gotta put a cap on the amount of beauty in SJM’s novels, it’s becoming too much.

With [Maeve’s] attention elsewhere, Lorcan took up a place at Aelin’s side—as if they were somehow allies in this, would fight back-to-back. Aelin didn’t bother to say anything to him.

I mean, Lorcan being on your side gives you a much better chance of rescuing Elide, but sure Alien, be like that.

That ripple of Lorcan’s power the day Ansel’s fleet had closed in … [Aelin]’d known it was a summoning. The same way she’d summoned the Valg to Skull’s Bay. She’d refused to immediately explain Ansel’s presence, wanting to enjoy the surprise of it, and he had summoned Maeve’s armada to take on what he’d believed to be an enemy fleet. To save Elide.

This seems kinda weird to me? Elide has stated to Lorcan numerous times that she’s on Alien’s side, so wouldn’t Maeve consider her a threat and an enemy? Why would Lorcan summon her to save Elide, then? But whatever, the less time we dwell on shitty writing, the quicker we get this shitshow over with.

Elide was trembling; every bone, every pore was trembling

Every pore??? Lmfao is SJM just giving up at this point?? She can’t shoehorn in sexual references when her protag is confronting the villain so she wants to just get it over with.

Lorcan betrays them and Alien is shocked, but like... why are y’all surprised Lorcan was literally only with you guys for Elide, he has no reason to like anyone else in Alien’s group of jackasses.

Flame danced at Aelin’s fingertips. No. Her magic had been emptied, still hovered near burnout.

Maeve kick her ass please I am begging you, wipe the fucking floor with her

Maeve returned Aelin’s smile. “(...)Of course, the fools didn’t realize that when you had drained yourself on their armies, I’d be waiting. You were already exhausted after putting out the fires I had my armada ignite to tire you on Eyllwe’s coast. It was a convenience that Lorcan gave your precise location and saved me the energy of tracking you down myself.” A trap. An enormous, wicked trap. To drain Aelin’s power over days— weeks.

Alien’s tiny mind is fucking blown by this but no fucking shit!!! You’re a dumbass who thinks wasting her magic on shooting fireworks out of her ass is a good idea, of course someone would notice and take advantage of you!! Does Alien even have a goddamn brain???

“The armada was a precaution. Just in case the ilken didn’t arrive for you to wholly drain yourself … I figured a few hundred ships would make for good kindling until I was ready.” To sacrifice [Maeve’s] own fleet—or part of it—to gain one prize … This was madness. The queen was utterly insane.

I mean. Maeve is an evil bloodthirsty monster, but she’s way smarter than any of these dumbasses. Honestly, I’m starting to root for her. She figured out her enemy’s weakness and used it against them, which is more brain power than Alien is capable of.

Flame slammed outward, red and golden—just as a wall of darkness lashed for Aelin. The impact shook the world. Even Manon was thrown on her ass.

Love how SJM tries to make this showdown all ~epic and uhmayzing~ but then throws in Manon falling flat on her ass. The rivalry between Maeve and Alien is barely developed so I’m hardly excited for Maeve to kick Alien’s ass. Makes me wish I could be reading Death Note instead, now there’s a good power play between rival characters.

Lorcan grabs Elide while Maeve and Alien duke it out and he tries to get her to run.

[Elide] would not. She’d sooner die than flee like a coward, not when Aelin was going to the mat for all of them, when—

Going to the mat? Wtf??? Yes I know it’s an expression of struggling/fighting until defeated or victorious, but this completely threw me out of the story when I read it. This is a (supposedly) medieval setting, and this saying just seems out of place in this setting.

A whip of black sliced into Aelin. She went down. And Elide thought the impact of Aelin Galathynius’s knees hitting the sand might have been the most horrible sound she’d ever heard.

Elide was literally enslaved in a tower and abused by her uncle but seeing some stupid queen she barely knows getting the shit kicked out of her is the worst thing she’s ever witnessed. Okay, SJM, okay. Elide deserves so much better than to be reduced to a fangirl to splooge over Alien.

Aelin crawled backward, blood sliding from her right nostril. Dripping on her white shirt.

*clenches fist* fragmentsssssss. A comma or the word and would’ve sufficed better there.

Aelin tried to rise. Tried, but her legs had given out. The Queen of Terrasen panted, fire flickering like dying embers around her.

I’ll admit, I rather like the symbolism of the embers dying out around her, highlighting how she’s utterly failed and gotten her ass whooped. Very nice.

Fenrys and Gav roll up to the party while Maeve continues to beat Alien. I know it’s cruel to say, but I’m rather enjoying Alien getting her arrogant ass whooped after unfairly winning literally every confrontation with no effort in this novel.

But Maeve let the darkness around Aelin part. She was curled on her side, bleeding from both nostrils now, more blood dribbling from her panting mouth.

Considering she’s getting whipped and stabbed by black magic, I think she should be bleeding from actual wounds than having just a nosebleed lmao. Maeve starts grilling Gav.

“Did I or did I not tell you to execute Lorcan on sight?” “There were … circumstances that prevented it from happening. We tried.” “Yet you failed. Am I not supposed to discipline my blood-bonded who fail me?” Gavriel lowered his head. “Of course—we will accept it. And I will also take on the punishment you intended for Aelin Galathynius.”

NOOOOO I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD SJM IF YOU KILL OFF GAV FOR ALIEN TO LIVE I WILL FUCKING FIGHT YOU

So Maeve kicks Gav out of her court and dishonors him, but he lives, thank god. If Gav ends up dying in this series I’m gonna have to have a long angry chat with SJM. Gav basically disappears for the rest of the scene even though he’s right there? Whatever spares him from the agony of this shitty book I guess.

Elide splooges about what a badass assassin Alien was and how she’ll wait for the right moment to strike, before Maeve removes all of Alien’s weapons for that exact reason. My sides hurt from the fucking cackling I did at that. Can’t believe I am about to stan Maeve, but she’s a ruthless, badass, calculating villain who is capable of thinking about things other than sex. Nothing but respect for my evil queen.

“What a powerhouse you two would be—[Aelin] and Prince Rowan. And any offspring of that union …” A vicious smirk. “You and Rowan could rule this continent if you wished. But your children … your children would be powerful enough to rule an empire that could sweep the world.”

Ungh, c’mon Maeve, I know you’re just fucking with Alien, but don’t make me read that garbage. Can’t wait until there’s a sequel series to Thr0ne of glass about Alien’s goblin kids being even more uber powered special snowflakes than their mother. C’mon, you know SJM would.

“It was so easy to tug on the right psychic thread that day Rowan saw Lyria at the market. To shove him down that other path, to trick those instincts. A slight altering of fate.” (...) Maeve said, “So your mate was given to another. And I let him fall in love, let him get her [pregnant]. And then I broke him. No one ever asked how those enemy forces came to pass by his mountain home.”

Great, so Lyria was nothing but a plot point to get Ratlin together now? Fuck off SJM, stop reducing your other characters as nothing but plot points for your precious OTP. Lyria deserved so much better than this.

“[Rowan] took the blood oath without question. And I knew that whenever you were born, whenever you’d come of age … I’d ensure that your paths crossed, and you’d take one look at each other and I’d have you by the throat. Anything I asked for, you’d give to me. Even the keys. For your mate, you could do no less. You almost did that day in Doranelle.”

Lmfao I love how one of the main selling points fans use for this series were “it depicts love accurately, Alien has more than one love interest!1″ and SJM fucking killed any chance of using that as a positive of the series hahahahaha I am actually fucking dying. Chaol, Dorito, and Sam didn’t mean shit because her one true love was Rowboat all long. Couldn’t have written a shittier plot twist if I tried, SJM, hats off to you. That deserves a slow clap.

Maeve ignored [Elide pleading]. “Well? When did you know [Rowan was her mate]?” “At Temis’s temple,” Aelin admitted, glancing to Manon. “The moment the arrow went through his shoulder. Months ago.”

Nothing turns me on more than my abusive boyfriend almost dying by an arrow to the shoulder. I know, I know, the mating bond in AC0TAR is different than the ones in T0G, but still.

Maeve shrugged. “If it’s any consolation, Aelin, you would have had a thousand years with Prince Rowan. Longer.”

Go tf off, Maeve!!!! I’d read an entire book of Maeve just ripping Alien a new one tbh

Turns out Alien is due to Settle in five years or so. What a relief, SJM’s precious Mary Sue won’t ever have to grow, god forbid, old and ugly! Phew, really dodged a bullet there!

Maeve calls out Cairn, the asshole dude Lorcan brought up many chapters prior.

A handsome, brown-haired warrior walked toward them from the cluster of escorts. Handsome, if it weren’t for the sadistic cruelty singing in his blue eyes.

So is he handsome or not, SJM? These two sentences are so contradictory. Maeve gives Alien a choice whether to come willingly or to refuse and let Elide be dragged along. Alien is a selfish shitlord, but she cares about Elide despite barely knowing her, so we all know which she’ll probably choose.

Next chapter, finally, holy shit that one was so long I had to skim most of it.

Aelin’s body hurt. Everything hurt. Her blood, her breath, her bones. There was no magic left. Nothing left to save her.

It’s funny how this is framed as we’re supposed to feel bad for poor Alien but I’m laughing my ass off. Act like a little shit, get hit, Alien.

Aelin simply nodded at the Fae Queen. Her acceptance and surrender.

Surprise, surprise. I’ll at least give Alien a little credit for considering the safety of somebody else besides herself or Rowboat’s Fae peen. Man, the bar is set pretty low, eh?

And because she had won, Maeve even loosened her power’s grip on Aelin’s bones. Allowed Aelin to turn to Elide and say, “Go with Manon. She will take care of you.” Elide began crying, shoving away from Lorcan. “I’ll go with you, I’ll come with you—��

Wtf Elide, no, you’re smarter than this!!!! Alien is sacrificing herself so you can be free, you run and get Alien’s comrades and then you have a chance to free Alien afterwards!! Goddamnit SJM you’re making me repulsed by Elide because all she is now is a tool to fawn over Alien dhfkhfksdh I'm so goddamn mad

Aelin’s soul splintered as she saw the iron box the escorts now carried between them. An ancient, iron coffin. Big enough for one person. Crafted for her.

Oof, so there’s the coffin bit I’ve been hearing about. Can’t really say I’m sorry for Alien. Yeah I know that’s mean, but she’s a massive unlikable selfish asshole who gets everything handed to her without her doing any work, so forgive me for not feeling bad when she finally gets a good deserved kick in the bottom.

“And tell Rowan,” Aelin said, fighting her own sob, “that I’m sorry I lied. But tell him it was all borrowed time anyway. Even before today, I knew it was all just borrowed time, but I still wish we’d had more of it.”

Again, good concept, just wasted on an absolute shit tier ship. Someone write an AU of this but with a good ship, yeah? And, y’know, rewrite most of the plot so it makes sense.

Maeve lowered the mask and drawled to Aelin, “Rumor claims you will bow to no one, Heir of Fire.” That serpentine smile. “Well, now you will bow to me.” She pointed to the sand. Aelin obeyed.

I shouldn’t be enjoying this as much as I am, but ahhh feels so good to read Alien get taken down a peg or two after being so irritatingly arrogant! Feels good, feels organic.

“Take off your shirt.” Aelin tugged her shirt out of her pants and slung it over her head, tossing it in the sand beside her. Then she removed the flexible cloth around her breasts.

So.... a bra, essentially? Is she wearing a bra? Or was SJM unsure of whether or not medieval women wore bras and was like “Ehhhh I’ll describe it as just a cloth, that way nobody can point fingers at me for shitty world building!”

Aelin didn’t fight as [the Fae warriors] each gripped her by an arm and hauled her up. Spread her arms wide. The sea air kissed her breasts, her navel.

Man, given how there’s only a few chapters left, this may be the last unnecessary focus on a female character’s breasts we get in this novel. And it’s right before our main character endures a harsh whipping. Oh SJM, you never disappoint.

Cairn halted. [Aelin] felt him studying the tattoo on her back. Rowan’s loving words, written there in the Old Language. Cairn snorted. Then she felt him revel in how he’d destroy that tattoo.

Evidently, SJM never learned what nuanced characters are. Cairn whips Alien some until Maeve orders them to chuck Alien into the iron coffin. Manon peaces out with Elide, and I hope SJM lets them run away with Abraxos to a better novel.

Time—[Aelin] was grateful Elena had given her that stolen time. Grateful she had met them all, that she had seen some small part of the world, had heard such lovely music, had danced and laughed and known true friendship. Grateful that she had found Rowan. She was grateful.

Another good example of good concept that’s wasted on a shitty character. This should be breaking my heart, but it’s about Alien and I fucking hate Alien more than almost any other fictional character. So alas, I’m left just feeling hallow and tired.

So Aelin Galathynius dried her tears. And did not fight when Maeve strapped that beautiful iron mask over her face.

Seems odd Alien would describe what is essentially an object meant to torture her as beautiful, but alright. We’re almost done folks, buckle up for the final leg of this shitstorm of a journey.

#the worm talks #the worm reads: eos #anti sjm #anti tog #anti eos

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ohcaptaintarthister · 7 years ago

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What's Mine and When Is It Yours?

I watched the first season of Game of Thrones along with everyone else. It wasn’t the kind of show you watched to chill back and turn off your brain. The intrigue, the violence, the insane plot twists and the general unpredictability kept me on the edge of my seat. Alas, with grad school giving me a final beatdown and plus a most unexpected job offer, I forgot about the show and spent more time at the desk than on any comfortable surface. It wasn’t until 2015 when there was finally time to catch up, from season two to four.

You know how it is. A binge lasts for only so long. In less than a week, I was done. Boobed out (hi, Season 2). Done with everything else an adult should be busy with–no deadlines because everything was turned in early, no more school for the moment. There was a sort-of beginning that surprisingly became a romance. I eagerly waited for the next season of Game of Thrones.

And found out it was gonna premiere later than usual.

I was a show watcher before reading the books. My introduction to Brienne of Tarth was by way of Gwendoline Christie trouncing Loras Tyrell. Her lines were few in that episode but the character had already made an impression. I looked up the character and ate more junk food than any human should eat in a year as Brienne sparred with Jaime Lannister, beating his ass and basically calling him scum right to his face. When his hand paid the price for defending her honor, my allegiance swung not only towards the Kingslayer but even more with Brienne. I would stop breathing every time they were together onscreen, wondering if this was when they would–you guessed it–kiss.

Having caught up and not having much to do (I was oddly productive in 2015), there was no choice but to wait.

And wait.

I cruised online for anything about JB. That’s when I discovered fan fiction.

Aside from my day job, I also write. Newspapers, magazines, books–the only place where I haven’t been published was online. It never entered my mind to write fan fiction. No self-respecting PUBLISHED author would waste her time reading and writing fan fiction. No one. At least that’s what I thought until I read my first JB fan fiction, Beast and The Beast by SigilBroken.

It was fucking awesome!

It was Modern AU. Jaime an athlete with a hand injury. Brienne, a competitive swimmer. I loved every word of it. I was floored with how the author captured the relationship that at that time, I’ve only seen on TV. I was so gobsmacked that I read her other JB works, like In This Light and Honor Thy Regard. I discovered other JB fanfic writers like RoseHeart, Ellaria, Just A Girl and Lady In Red. To this day, they remain my favorite writers and wish so fervently they will write again.

Because of them, I had a new appreciation and respect for fan fiction. Yes, fan fiction is derivative, it builds on a canon world but also deviates from it too. It is also original even when the characters are not yours. The works of the authors I mentioned above told me that fan fiction was a different ball game but also the same with all writing: it’s hard work. Very hard work. Fan fiction is strangely freeing, in my experience but it is very hard work!

I lurked around AO3 reading whatever JB fanfic struck me. When I couldn’t find any more interesting stories, I plucked up the courage to write my first JB fan fiction, Loving Harder and More. I was anxious, excited, terrified. It my first time to publish online and not under my real name. How will my story fare against the others I’ve read and loved? Later, I realized I shouldn’t compare myself to SigilBroken and company.

Hand on heart, they really are the best writers in the fandom. Their stories taught me how to dive into the characters but also be able to extrapolate sensibly. I still look to their stories for inspiration, unbothered that no matter how much I write, I never be as good. What mattered was I was writing and challenging myself.

In my fan fics, Brienne has been a professor, a black ops agent, hairstylist, masseuse, bodyguard to royalty. She has is always loved and appreciated, but also went through the nightmare of a sexual assault and an emotionally abusive marriage. Jaime has been a scientist, a devoted husband and loving dad, a creative director, actor. He is loved and has a full life with Brienne despite having gone through several levels of hell too.

What strings my work together is the smut. I’m proud of that. And I’m glad when people comment on its quality because it’s hard to write! It really is.

Which finally (fucking finally!) brings me to the point of this long-ass (one of SeleneU’s favorite words) piece.

Imitation is the best form of flattery–to an extent. I see no harm when someone compliments me on my shoes and goes out to buy the same pair. It’s hilarious and make plans to wear the same pair with the person. But see, in this kind of imitation, at least the other person makes the effort to go to the store and buy the shoes. He or she also has the right to get those fucking shoes.

It’s not imitation at all when scenes and even plots from stories I worked hard on are copied word-for-word. It might be buried under all the other paragraphs of another’s work but I find it. And it is always distressing because someone is getting praise over something that’s blatantly and even proudly copied from mine. That’s not right. There’s no effort at all no, you SHOULDN’T FUCKING DO IT.

It’s not the kudos and hits that concern me. It’s the copying. Word-for-word. It’s not even done subtly. How hard is it to come up with your own plot? Writing is difficult but it’s never a justification to copy someone else’s work. It’s like taking a dagger in the back when someone comments on my work and then��takes the thing she precisely commented on and presents it as her own! Holy hell. That takes a huge pair of really entitled balls!

How do you get out of bed? Don’t they snag or graze across the ground when you walk? Don’t they fucking hurt?

I write for myself and am thankful when people love my stories enough to leave encouragement and kudos. I’m happy whenever I finish another one and still get excited after posting it, waiting for when it gets its first comment. And people who love them, in a way the stories are theirs too, isn’t? Theirs to read and read, to download and read again. But it never becomes theirs that they have the right to copy and post it as their own.

It’s fan fiction so there’s no way to nail these cheating asses by any legal means. But as someone who would rather believe that decency still triumphs in the era of Trump, if you are of right mind, you don’t have to be told it’s not nice to copy other people’s work. Right?

If you like an author’s work so much, gestures of appreciation that do not involve copying will go a long, long way–possibly as far as Sothoryos. Say your work was inspired by a favorite author. Or at least give a shoutout. If you want to build on a story by a different author, please ask for her permission. But never, never, absolutely never copy another’s work.

I realize how easy it is to copy but it is not going to help the current situation of the fanfic in the JB fandom. Personal opinion, but there’s only one way of peeling a fucking banana and what’s been done is the fruit and the skin have been diced and spliced to death but there’s no denying it’s still the same fucking banana. That’s the kind of stories crowding AO3 quite often (I’m being conservative).

Nowadays, there’s hardly an author who tries to do something different and writes so well, except for isavedlatin (A Star Within the Mere), SeleneU (Pieces of You and A Story Without End), LuxEvergreen (A Walk with Frost and Fire), ShirleyAnn66 (Jaime Lannister Investigations). Off the top of my head, they’re the writers I follow and whose work are original and a pleasure to read. I’m reading some new fan fics but it’s still too early to tell how they’ll turn out. They are promising, that I can say.

I suppose prompts can help with creativity. It depends on the writer. But from what I’ve been seeing, a strong dependence on them will be a hindrance to the good writer you can become. Yes, they’re fun but you’re writing a story that’s not really what you want to tell. I don’t know. Its not helping the writers I used to follow and are now stuck in prompt rut. Still, despite prompts, there’s copying…of my work. Nearly word-for-word.

Which really sucks.

When someone says, “Hey, this person writes like you!” I see come similarities but the story is still different from mine. That’s nice. But when I’m told, “I swear this was your story until I saw the name and it wasn’t,” I check and holy shit, it really reads like I wrote it because it’s practically a scene from one of my stories. Word-for-fucking-word!

Sad, isn’t it? Never thought I’d rather be slammed for writing a threesome story of Jaime, Brienne and Tormund. Being copied is a lot worse.

I’ve calmed down a bit since making the discovery but my resolve to limit access to my fan fics remains just as strong. It’s hard, you know. Aside from it being a slow process, this step means my work won’t appear in public unless one logs in on AO3. On the heels of this, I realized that people who like my work aren’t part of any group. That tells me I don’t need to be a part of anything to be read–and it’s stupendous knowing that people legitimately like what I write instead of being liked just because I’m part of a group.

With the audience most definitely fewer, I’m encouraged more than ever to write. It means less snark and hateful comments when I experiment. It may also lessen the possibility of being copied. My fan fics are my babies and I make the time to write them as well as I can. If restricting access makes me a better writer, I’m still taking it! I will never pass up any chance to improve just as long as I never run out of my OWN ideas and keep writing. Because I the end, that’s all that matters, right?

Also, if you claim to love the story of Jaime and Brienne, don’t you think they deserve original stories? I don’t believe they’ll end up together in the books but in fan fiction they have, over and over. And as fans, it’s our responsibility to explore the different ways we can bring them there–through our own imagination and creativity.

#fanfiction #jaime x brienne #brienne x jaime #tormund x brienne #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #tormund #my writing #writing

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bluerene · 7 years ago

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river, part three [starx]

Hellooooooo

Finally wrapped up part three! Phew, got a little lost in writing it, especially because I want the characters to feel real and I don’t want to get wrapped up in too much plot. I wanted to get this out of the way before I put up Chapter 5 of Liability, so that I can continue editing and writing with a clear conscience <3 Parts one and two are linked here and at the bottom in case a refresher is needed.

take note of the following: stubborn laptop + late writing = formatting issues. bear with me, edits shall be made. Story is post-tokyo, sans kiss, slightly aged up Titans...lots and lots and LOTS of love for @fireflyxrebel who never fails to gush and fangirl and make me cry with her insanely kind words. Show her some love, she’s written some pretty incredible fic. <3 <3 <3

I invite and appreciate critiques, requests, reblogs, and reviews! even the tiny ones :) <3

without further ado, part three, my friends.

A couple of days passed and I was still a little lost on how to plan the date. I was out of practice as it was, it had been a while since I’d had to put in the effort to impress a girl. And I don’t mean that like, “I’m a fucking champ at getting laid without even trying”. I honestly have no idea where to begin.

It couldn’t be outside; we would meet too early in the day and I wasn’t about to greet her maskless. That ruled out a picnic or a restaurant or the movies. I couldn’t take her to the botanical gardens or go stargazing on the beach.

I didn’t think it would be a good idea to bring her back to my place. She’d probably kill me anyway, thinking that I was presuming.

Eventually, I settled on an old planetarium that was partially in the process of being remodeled. Construction had been halted for about a month already, due to some issues between the co-owners. Didn’t matter to me, I had a spot and I had an idea.

Starfire and I hadn’t talked much since our conversation a few nights ago. She wanted to keep our communications lowkey and preferred that we text at night when the other Titans weren’t around to peek over her shoulder or express interest in who she was speaking with. It made things easier for us both, especially because I worked long hours during the day. Not that she knew that piece of information. If she did, she’d never quit on the little redemption story she’s trying to write me into.

I could picture her, gorgeous eyes wide, our hands clasped together, asking me why I did what I did. If I ever let it get there, I wouldn’t be able to resist telling her. And that was something I wasn’t willing to risk.

I thought about not going on the date. Never giving her a time or place, or worse, blowing her off completely. Prove to her I’m as terrible as I want to be. Kill the hope she has for me.

But it’s Starfire. I could never do that to her.

I kept thinking about all of our interactions over the years, brief and non. The first time I had her pinned to the wall, her expression shifting from confused to furious before I could finish my suggestion. The night we found ourselves trapped in a LexCorp vault, her fingers gripping my arms as we were squished into a corner, surrounded by various menacing devices. Her look of wonder when I caught her from a nasty fall a few months back, the surprise in her eyes when she realized I wasn’t Boy Blunder.

Jesus Christ, I was totally gone, wasn’t I?

Fuck.

I had a job I needed to do that night. I’d trip an alarm and get her attention, pull her aside and tell her the whole thing was off. It was stupid of me to suggest in the first place. And it was stupider of her to accept.

I preferred to not compromise the assignment, but she’d already made it clear that it was difficult to sneak out at night. Once the Titans finished patrol, they returned to the Tower and went into total lockdown. If a window or door was opened or broken, Cyborg would get the alert. That had been news to me, and I realized that their security had probably been heightened since the theft of the suit and everything else that followed.

That evening, I broke into a private laboratory. Wasn’t too heavily guarded, I counted five, maybe six security officers stationed around the perimeter of the building, and three patrolling the halls inside. Lots of cameras, but I could mess with the feed by transmitting an older tape on a loop to the surveillance room. I was careful not to use my belt while I made my way to the main lab. There were energy sensors set up all over, designed to bring attention to any odd bursts of power that might be expelled across the premises. I fucking hate scientists sometimes.

No confrontations occurred. A+ for me. I made it into the central lab with ease, keying in the numbers my client had instructed me to use. It was a circular room with several stations, each one cluttered with tools and paperwork. Red lasers crisscrossed the area, but there were little pockets of space around the tables. Towards the back of the lab, there were wide glass windows mounted on the paneled wall, but it was too dark to see what was behind them.

“Here we go,” I muttered, cracking my knuckles and shaking out my hands. One run, not too challenging.

I leaped forward, careful to avoid the scarlet lines that cut through the air. Every action was precise, my hands and feet never lingering on the ground for more than a few seconds. I used the momentum of each handspring to push myself forward, each jump allowing me to twist through the air, clear of any obstacles.

I stumbled a little when I landed, bracing myself against the wall, relief washing over me when I realized I hadn’t tripped any alarms.

I ran my fingers along the grooves in the wall, pulling gently to see if any would budge. There was supposed to be a door to the main office somewhere…

I heard a faint click, and the panel I was gripping hissed open. Sweet.

I was in and out pretty quickly. My day job taught me some pretty cool tricks, including how to hack an “impenetrable” firewall. I accessed the desktop and downloaded several encrypted files onto a pair of flash-drives I’d brought with me. One for the client, and one for me, so I could see what I’d gotten myself into. Shut down the computer, slipped out of the office, closed the door - easy. Getting the Titans here, isolating Starfire, and keeping what I came for - that would be hard.

I darted through the lasers, flinching when the klaxon alarm screeched. I shoved the door open and hit the center of my belt quickly, teleporting to the roof. And then, I waited.

----

I had been lying on the sofa with my legs hooked over the side, deeply engrossed in a romance novel when the Titan alert rang. I glanced up, unsurprised to find Robin glaring at the console.

“Red X,” he said scathingly, turning to address the rest of us. I did not listen to what he said, my eyes immediately finding Raven’s.

I did not wish for X to come to any harm. Perhaps I was being foolish, but I would feel I had failed him if I did not follow through with our arrangement.

My anger flared for a moment - it was unfair that he had not even considered my offer, or at least avoided thievery prior to the date.

“Clorbag,” I grumbled, crossing my arms.

“ - all of us, so Starfire and I can go instead.”

I snapped to attention, “What?”

Robin shrugged, “Nothing was reported stolen, so I don’t think all of are required for this one. You and I can bring him in. It’ll make up for Monday night.” He gave me a half-smile when he said that, quiet butterflies awakening in my stomach. I rarely felt that way around him anymore.

“I do not think-”

“Awwww, ain’t that cute,” Cyborg grinned, nudging Beast Boy, “takin’ down criminals together.”

“I would like to go alone if that is okay,” I said meekly.

Robin tilted his head, confusion evident on his face, “What? Why? Starfire, you can’t go without backup.”

“I will be brief, I promise, I would simply like to have the ‘words’ with him.” It was not a lie, I planned on speaking with him, although it may not have been what Robin thought.

“Red X does go pretty easy on her,” Raven added helpfully, “if you want, I can go with. Keep an eye on her.”

I disliked that phrasing, but I was grateful for her assistance.

Robin pursed his lips, “I don’t want-”

“We do not have the luxury of time,” I interjected.

He sighed and hung his head, “just go.”

I nodded and flew to Raven’s side. Moments later, her powers engulfed us, carrying us to the location Robin had instructed us to investigate.

“Alright,” she said upon arrival, placing her hands on her hips, “what do you want me to do here?”

“Accept my humble gratitude with a hug and keep the security officers busy while I find X.”

She rolled her eyes, “The second one I can do. Save your hugs for later. Keep him out of trouble.”

I did not smile - it seemed that he could not help but get himself into trouble time and time again.

Raven spoke with the guards, which allowed me the opportunity to fly around the building. I could not find any broken windows or weaknesses in structure, which made me wonder if he had left the building at all.

As I floated higher, I noticed a movement out of the corner of my eye.

Of course he was waiting on the roof.

I landed softly, allowing energy to flood my eyes with fury. This was truly disappointing to find.

He had been peering over the edge cautiously, but once he was aware of my presence, he shot up and faced me, a hand hovering in front of his belt. He relaxed when he realized I was the only one.

“Starfire.”

X’hal, I cannot explain how much I enjoyed hearing him say my name. It was strange, there was a gentle lilt to his tone, a soothing quality that calmed me. My eyes dimmed slightly, but I did not relinquish the blaze completely.

“Red X.”

“You sound unhappy, beautiful. Am I not what you wanted?”

I was taken aback by the bitterness in his voice. I had only heard it once before, on an occasion I doubt he even remembers.

We were battling the Hive Five. I had been knocked out of the air, and in my panic, forgot to fly. I still relied on Robin, back then, and often put myself in his way in hopes that he might catch me.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I neared the ground, bracing for the impact that never came.

Arms had caught me. I had touched his chest and quietly murmured, “Robin”. I felt him chuckle, and in a low voice, whisper, “not quite, Cutie.”

My eyes opened to find my savior was someone else entirely.

“Red X!” I squeaked.

He set me down gently, and in the same tired, bitter inflection, replied, “Sorry to disappoint,” before shimmering into the midst of the fight.

It hurt to hear him speak that way.

“I am disappointed that you thought you could continue to commit crimes, despite our-”

“Agreement? Starfire, you made this happen. You pushed me into it. I didn’t want a date,” he said sourly.

I raised my eyebrow, “this was not your goal? Then please, X, explain the flirting. Explain the constant requests. Explain the kindness you show me, the compassion you show only me.”

“I’m teasing, cutie. It’s what I do. I mess around. I steal, I cheat, I lie. Get over it.”

His words sounded rehearsed and detached. I had been on the receiving end of such words before.

“I do not accept that.”

He shrugged, “your problem, not mine. See you around, cutie.”

I growled and launched myself at him, throwing my arms around him as his fist hit the center of his belt.

He yelped in protest, but it was too late.

We landed in a tangled mess on soft carpet, my hands still gripping him tightly as he fumbled around in the dark.

I loosened my hold and rolled away from him, feeling my surroundings until I found a wall. I leaned against it and rose.

“Where are we?”

He cursed, but did not move to turn on the lights, “my apartment.”

That interested me.

“Oh, wonderful. Perhaps now you will be willing to sit and talk.”

“Nothing to discuss. You’re leaving.”

“You think so?” I asked, stretching my hand out hesitantly. I found his arm and curled my fingers around his hand.

“I’ll make you leave,” he said tonelessly, removing his hand from mine. He moved closer and settled his palms on my biceps, wary of holding me too tight.

“I would like to see you try,” I retorted.

He made a little noise of frustration and dropped his hands, “Jesus, Starfire, why are you being so difficult? It was stupid of you to ask, it was stupid of me to accept. Let it go. I can’t be what you want.”

“Cannot or will not?”

“Does it matter?” He asked incredulously, “Bottom line, nothing’s different. This...whatever, never happened.”

“But you wanted it to.”

“Of course I did,” he exploded, backing away from me, “how could I not? But I’m not an idiot. You can’t be around someone like me. You can’t make me change, you can’t ‘fix’ me or make me think you’re interested in me so that you get what you want. Heroes and thieves don’t play nice.”

“You have,” I pointed out, trying to ignore the pain his familiar words brought me.

He let out a bark of laughter, though it was clear he found no humor in this, “you got me there, cutie, that changes everything.”

My eyes had adjusted to the darkness, the faint shapes of the furniture surrounding us becoming more evident to me.

X was leaning against a...couch? An armchair, it seemed, once I squinted. I kept my distance, drawing circles on the wall behind me absentmindedly.

“I am more than just a hero,” I said finally, “I have heard your words before. All this talk of being one thing...humans are so much more complex than that.”

“You’re more than just a hero,” he agreed, “but beautiful, I am what I am.”

“Not without purpose.”

“What is it with you? Give it up already,” he snarled, “why do you trust me so much?”

“You have had too many opportunities to hurt me and my friends. Instead, you have protected us. Protected me,” I paused, “I will not push you to be ‘fixed’. Trust means I must have faith that you are doing what you must.”

“Thanks,” he muttered.

“I still want the date.”

He tilted his head, “what?”

I gave him a tiny smile, “I have often heard the phrase ‘do not mix business with pleasure’. I should not have coupled my heroic agenda with my personal agenda. Our date shall commence as planned, with no talk of you joining the Titans.”

He shifted uncomfortably, tugging at the collar of his suit, “Ah, cutie -”

“You have already admitted you would like to date me. Is it so farfetched to think I could feel the same?” The words spilled from my mouth before I could stop myself. I flushed, thankful for the darkness.

He stiffened and fell silent. I could almost see him working through my words, deciding if he should believe me or not.

“No,” he said finally. I was relieved to hear amusement trickling into his tone, “I guess not.”

“Wonderful. Please take me back to the laboratory, now,” I stretched out my hand expectantly.

He took it and tugged me into him, settling his arm around my waist, “anything for you, beautiful.”

We landed on the roof of the building far more gracefully. He released me from his grasp quickly, laughing quietly when I stumbled into his chest.

“I am not used to chemical transportation,” I said apologetically, blushing yet again.

“You should get going,” he said, jerking his head in the direction Raven and I had come from, “your teammates are probably wondering where you are.”

“That is likely. I thank you for your honesty tonight. I shall see you Saturday,” I lifted into the air and glanced around for Raven. I was certain she sensed my disappearance and return, and would no doubt be very cranky and concerned.

“Starfire,” he said quietly, pulling on my ankle gently.

I frowned and dropped beside him, “yes?”

“Don’t kill me for this,” he breathed. He flipped up the bottom of his mask quickly, revealing a smooth, square jaw and a mouth that was quickly pressed to mine.

[end of part three] part two part one

#starx #starfire #red x #teen titans #fanfic #raven #robin #beast boy #cyborg #blue writes #YOOOO PART THREE #river

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