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thatsmzbitchtoyou · 1 year ago

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Sex pollen!Bucky Barnes one shot

What a weird night. Another mission blowing up an old Hydra base, ransacking it for information before the explosion. You and Bucky had been scouring emptied shelves and desks. All computers and hard drives had already been wiped clean. As you explored you found a lone flower in a pot, sitting in the middle of an exam table in an abandoned lab.

“What is this?” you wondered out loud, walking closer to the flower but not daring to touch it. It looked otherworldly, a color that you could only describe as indigo with iridescent anthers that seemed to glow as you came closer. You took a picture and sent it to headquarters. A video call quickly came back within seconds of you sending the picture.

“Hey Shuri, what am I looking at?” you asked.

“DON’T TOUCH IT! GET AWAY FROM IT!” she yelled, her eyes bulging through the screen. You quickly stepped back, staring at it in fear.

“What the hell is going on? What is it?”

“We don’t have a name for it here on earth, the only way I can describe it is an alien aphrodisiac. The anthers on it will shoot out a dust that will make the one who breathes it extremely aroused to the point that if they don’t…copulate quickly it could cause dangerously high heart palpitations, abdominal pain, even psychotic breaks. It can severely hurt or even kill you.”

“An alien aphrodisiac?” you asked dumbly, staring at the flower again. It was beautiful, and you could feel a strange pull to go up to it and desire to touch it. Thankfully you had some sense of self-preservation. “Okay, what do we do with it?”

“Just get out of there and blow the place. The explosion should be enough to kill the plant. I don’t know how Hydra was able to get one, but there’s a reason they left it behind.”

“Jesus, okay, we’re on it. I’ll report back soon,” you ended the call then tried to get hold of Bucky. “Buck, can you hear me?” you said, hitting the earbud in your ear. Nothing. You left the room, walking down the corridor to another side of the base to try to get a better signal.

“Bucky, do you read me?” you called more loudly. You heard nothing but static. “Dammit,” you grumbled. You tried your phone since you’d been able to get hold of Shuri. After two rings he answered the video call.

“Hey doll, where are you?” he asked, a strange glowing behind him. Your eyes widened at the color of the glow.

“Buck, where are you?”

He turned, showing the lab you were just in. “This old lab, there’s this weird looking flower in here, we should probably bag it up and bring it in for testing,” he said, reaching a hand out to the flower.

“Bucky NO!” you screamed at your phone, already running back down the corridor.

It was too late. A large puff of indigo dust poofed from the flower’s anthers, surrounding Bucky and making him cough violently. By the time you reached the lab he was on his knees, dry heaving as the dust seemed to magically disappear into his skin.

“Shit,” you swore, running in and pulling him away from the flower. “We have to get out of here. Did you set all the charges?”

Bucky was unresponsive, still coughing and holding his stomach as he tripped over his feet as you dragged him out of the room. You grunted as you pulled him along back down the corridor, his arm hung over your shoulder.

“Come on Buck, stay with me,” you reached a hand up and grabbed his chin to make him focus on you. “Did you set the charges?!”

“Yeah,” cough, “yeah I got it,” his arm around your shoulder seemed to tighten as he doubled over in pain, his face getting dangerously close to yours, like he was nuzzling your cheek with his nose. “What the fuck was that thing?”

“Ugh, I’ll explain once we’re out,” you ignored his close proximity, pulling him through the halls until you finally found the entrance, quickly loading yourselves into the quinjet. As you placed him into a chair and buckled him in you noticed a sheen of sweat along his hairline. You gingerly placed a hand on his forehead. He was burning up. “Shit,” you swore again. When you turned away to start the jet Bucky groaned.

“Don’t, don’t leave me,” Bucky begged, his eyes screwed shut. His metal hand was warping the arm of the chair.

“I’m right here, Buck, just gotta get us in the air,” you placate him, getting the jet moving then turning to him again. “Where’s the remote for the charges?”

Bucky shifted in his seat, reaching towards his pants pocket but fumbling as his fingers trembled. You quickly reached down and dipped your hand into his pocket. Bucky moaned loudly as you touched him so close to his cock, which you just noticed was straining against his pants. He still had the sense to look embarrassed as your eyes flashed to his face when he moaned, but you pretended like nothing happened as you took the remote and once you were a good distance away detonated the charges. A loud boom reverberated as you flew away, taking out the base and the alien flower.

As you sank into the other chair and took a breath you called Shuri again.

“Shuri, it’s done, but we have a bit of a problem,” you started when her face showed up on the screen.

“Oh please don’t say what I think you’re going to say,” she pleaded, looking worried.

“Bucky wasn’t with me when I called you, so he didn’t know to stay away from the flower, and by the time I tried calling him there was no reception so I wasn’t able to tell him before he got too close to it. It blew right in his face and now he’s–”

“Ungh!” Bucky moaned again, his flesh hand palming himself through his pants. “What is this? God, it burns everywhere!”

“Oh Bast,” Shuri swore. “What are his symptoms?”

You stood back up, walking over to Bucky as he writhed in his chair. “Sweating profusely, high temperature, abdominal pains…hey Buck, open your eyes, look at me,” you directed him. He quickly responded to your voice, his eyes looking wild as he stared at you. “Pupils are dilated, and uh, well, some major arousal from what I can see,” you finished quickly, looking away from his debauched gaze.

“Damn, and it all started immediately upon breathing in the dust?” Shuri asked quickly, her body turned towards a screen that she was typing on.

“Yes, he was choking and dry heaving on it, and it seemed to, I don’t know, seep into his skin? It was crazy,” you rushed out. You felt a tug on your shirt, looking down and seeing Bucky’s metal fingers pulling on the hem of your shirt, trying to pull you closer to him. “And now he’s trying to touch me,” you stated plainly.

Shuri sighed, turning away from the screen she was looking at. “There’s nothing else that can help him. He needs to have sex as soon as possible or else he will get worse and worse until his heart or mind gives out. And seeing how much his mind has gone through in the last 80 years, you don’t have much time,” she remarked gravely. “I’m sorry I don’t have any better answers for you. This is something that we’ve never had to deal with before.”

You sighed, feeling Bucky’s fingers grab onto your thigh and pull you closer to him. “I get it, Shuri, thanks. Just…turn off the cameras and speakers for the jet, please?”

Shuri nodded with a pitiful smile on her face. “You got it, good luck.”

You hung up your phone and set it on the other pilot chair. You glanced back at Bucky and saw him crying as his metal fingers dug into your thigh. “Oh Buck, it’s okay,” you sank down onto your knees in front of him, your fingers wiping his tears.

He sniffed hard. “No, it’s not. This isn’t okay. I didn’t want it like this, this doesn’t give either of us a choice,” he cried, his metal fingers now rubbing the back of your neck. He didn’t seem to have control over what his hands were doing as his flesh hand pushed harshly against his cock. “It’s not fair.”

You nodded, “You’re right, it’s not fair, it’s not right. But I’m not going to let you die. It’s okay,” you reached your hand up and cupped his cheek again with your palm, which he happily hung his head into. “You’re my best friend, my mission partner, and I’m not going to lose you to some alien fucking flower. I want to help you, do you hear me?”

Bucky looked in your eyes deeply, looking for any hesitation. He didn’t find it. “Buck, I want to,” you reassured him resolutely. “I want you.”

That was all he needed to hear. He ripped the seat buckle off of him and stood quickly, pulling you up harshly from the floor and towards the back of the quinjet where there were a couple of rooms for resting. He picked the one with the bigger bed and shoved you through the door. As much as this situation was dire, you were also secretly excited. The feelings you’d tamped down as a childish crush were now coming full front as you peeled your mission suit off, kicking your boots off to a corner and then helping him get out of all the buckles and straps on his outfit. Once you were both naked he wasted no time in cupping your face in his hands and kissing you. The kiss was desperate, his fingers digging into the softness of your cheeks, his lips moving against yours then biting your lower lip. You gasped and he took his opportunity to stick his tongue in your open mouth, tasting your tongue and swirling it with his. His hands quickly traveled down your body, feeling his way over each hill and valley of your curves, settling his flesh hand on your breast, tweaking the nipple making you moan, and his metal hand kneading your ass. Your arms wrapped around his neck, fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

Bucky picked you up and heaved the both of you onto the mattress, gently seating himself between your legs. His hard cock was nestled against your stomach, the contact making him rut against you. He grunted as you bit his lip in return, another thrust against your core making you arch your back. He slipped his flesh hand between your bodies and felt around your lower lips, feeling the slick already building up. He moaned at how wet you were for him, using some of that slick on his thumb to bring it to your clit and rub you. You arched again, your hips thrashing as he flicked your clit and rubbed you harshly.

“Gotta get you ready for me,” he murmured, looking down at you and watching as he dipped two fingers into your pussy while his thumb kept busy on your clit. The fill of his fingers made you moan loudly, your mouth dropping open and hands digging into the sheets below you. He pumped his fingers lazily, his thumb doing all the work. You could feel the orgasm coming embarrassingly quickly, your hips gyrating against his hand.

“Oh god, Buck, I’m gonna cum, ungh,” your breath hitched as he flicked harder. The snap in your core was sudden, a yelp falling from your lips as you came on his fingers. He let you ride out the orgasm and the aftershocks, pulling his fingers out gently then bringing them up to his mouth and sucking on your juices. His eyes rolled back in his head as he licked his fingers clean. The scene almost made you cum again.

“Fuck, you taste divine, doll,” he growled. “Next time I’m gonna eat you out and pull as many orgasms from you as I can with my mouth.”

“Next time?” you breathed.

Bucky nodded as he shifted his hips and gripped his cock, lining himself up with your pussy. “Yeah, next time. Been wanting you for so long, doll. Although this isn’t the way I wanted it,” he paused as he pushed in slowly, making you gasp, “I’ll take whatever you’re willing to give me. Jesus, you’re tight!”

Your hands gripped his biceps, fingernails digging into his flesh arm. You tried to relax as he pushed slowly, trying to let you adjust even though you could tell he was struggling to go slow. The sweat was almost pouring off him now, his pupils dilated so much that his eyes looked almost completely black, his temperature even hotter than before. You worried that if he didn’t cum soon he’d pass out. He was trying to be careful, but he didn’t need careful, he needed relief.

“Buck,” you whined, swiveling your hips. He buckled as you moved, falling to his elbows above you. “Move, please. Just use me, honey. I can take it.”

“No,” Bucky grunted, “I don’t want to use you. You deserve better.”

“I know, hun, I know, but that’s not what you need right now. I need you to take me, please,” you ran your fingers through his hair then gripped it harshly, pulling his head up to look at you. He whimpered at your rough treatment, his eyes widening. “Fuck me, Bucky. Fuck me hard.”

His eyes seemed to glaze over as they narrowed at your words. His brow furrowed with determination as he moved himself to a different position, holding up your hips and lifting your legs over his hips. “Yes, doll,” he answered through gritted teeth. He then thrust into you violently, causing you to scream. He set a punishing pace, savagely driving himself into you as he chased his high. All you could do was hold on, your fingers grasping the sheets or his arms. You could feel the building orgasm in the pit of your pelvis as he hit your g-spot over and over. As your pussy fluttered around him he suddenly twisted you around, still inside you as he flipped you to your front and rutted into you from behind. The sound of skin slapping skin and gasping breaths filled the cabin as you moaned, trying to keep your hips up as he drilled you into the mattress.

“Bucky, oh baby, yes!” you cried, tears starting to form in your eyes. The new position made him reach even further inside you, making you see stars with each thrust. Your peak kept getting higher and higher until you finally fell, screaming his name as you came around him. Bucky shuddered as you came, your pussy convulsing around his cock, making him cum with a shout. He kept thrusting into you as he pumped you full of his cum, mumbling your name repeatedly. The flower dust had made him so incredibly horny that he kept cumming more than he normally would, making a mess as it overflowed from your pussy to the mattress below.

You both stilled as you calmed down from your highs, more dribbling out of you as you tried to regain your breathing. Bucky slowly pulled out, a squelching noise coming from your pussy as you both groaned, more cum dripping from your aching hole. You fell onto the mattress, your legs periodically shaking and arms splayed above your head. Bucky laid on the mattress next to you, breathing heavily.

After a few moments you shifted to your side facing Bucky. His eyes were closed, his mouth open as he breathed, his hair matted to his forehead from all the sweating. You reached out and moved some of his wet hair from his eyes. His eyes fluttered open at the feeling of your fingers. He looked at you with shining eyes, looking thoroughly fucked. You giggled at him, and he gave you a lopsided smile back.

“You feel better?” you asked slyly.

“Yes,” he chuckled. “Thank you, doll. I’m sorry I put you in this position,” he started, moving to his side to face you as well.

“Buck, it’s okay–”

“Will you go out with me?” he asked hurriedly. You blinked as your mind caught up to what he said. He watched you carefully as you processed what was happening.

“Yeah,” you smiled softly, closing the distance between you and kissing his cheek. It was very innocent considering you were both still naked. He smiled and took your free hand in his, giving your fingers a squeeze then bringing them to his lips and gave them a kiss.

“I know it’s too early, but um, I love you,” he confessed. “I’ve loved you for a long time.”

Your smile widened, your hand squeezing his hand back. “I love you, too, Buck. Probably too much.”

Bucky recoiled, “What do you mean too much? How could you love this,” he gestured to his body, “too much?”

You doubled over in laughter, slapping his chest as you straightened out after a minute. “You’ve been hanging out with Sam too much,” you laughed, wiping your eyes.

He laughed along with you, grimacing at the sound of Sam’s name. “Please don’t say Sam’s name while you’re naked in bed with me. It just doesn’t feel right.”

You laughed again, this time trying to stifle it behind your hand. “Okay, I’m sorry…Barnes,” you teased him. His eyes narrowed at you. “Or should I call you James?” he minutely shook his head. “Okay, how about…Sergeant?” His eyes widened. “Oooh, did I find a kink?” you giggled. “How about, sir?”

Bucky pounced on you, encircling you in his arms and tickling your sides. You squirmed against him as you screamed his name.

“That’s right, doll, that’s what I want to hear. You screaming my name,” he growled in your ear as he let up on the tickling. “Just Bucky is fine.”

“Haha, okay, okay…Bucky,” you said his name sensually.

Bucky moaned, rolling his eyes. “Don’t start, or else we’re never leaving this cabin.”

“Who said I was ready to leave?” you teased him again, your fingers scratching down his chest. His hips jutted forward as you flicked his nipples lightly.

“Okay, you asked for it,” he warned.

#sex pollen #oneshot #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #marvel #bucky barnes x reader #smut

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dykeadvocate · 5 months ago

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— ellie was the Imposter.

pairing: imposter!ellie x afab!reader

summary: you're a crewmate on the ship and unfortunately stumble upon the imposter's first murder.

content: noncon, fingering (r receiving), degradation, HEAVY blood mention, dead bodies, description of murder, character death, knives, dark!ellie.

a/n: yeah, this is an among us AU, what about it??

You covered your mouth to muffle a scream and your eyes widened in fear. “Holy fuck.”

Ellie Williams, one of the crewmates on the ship, stood over Tommy Miller’s dead body holding a knife. His blood leaked from the multiple stab wounds in his back, creating a large blood puddle surrounding them. Ellie’s uniform and knife were stained with his blood.

She stepped towards you, her grip around her knife tightening. She had a sick, disgusting smile painted across her face.

“You’re going to get caught, you know that, right?” you tried to sound confident, but the shake in your voice ruined that.

“Will I?”

You weren’t going to die, not here, not now. As Ellie continued to stalk toward you, her knife leaving a trail of blood, you frantically searched for an escape. Your eyes landed on the pipe on the other side of the room. If you were able to get it, you would have a chance of fighting back.

Surprising Ellie, you shoved her to the ground and sprinted towards the pipe. You sighed in relief when your fingers wrapped it.

Ellie growled and pulled herself to her feet. “Little bitch.”

You swung the pipe at her when she tried to get closer, just merely missing her. For a few minutes, that cycle repeated, until she was able to grab onto the pipe and pull you towards her.

“I never thought you would be so irritating to kill.” she sneered.

She slammed you into the wall and held her knife to your neck, smearing Tommy’s blood onto your skin. Her other hand held your hip down, pinning you against the wall and herself.

“I deserve to have a little fun with you before I slit your throat, don’t you think?”

“I think you’re fucking sick.”

Her hand slipped to your waistband, and you thrashed in her hold. She tsked, digging her fingernails into your skin.

“The more you fight, the longer and more painful your death will be.” she dug the tip of the knife into your skin to further her point.

Her knife dragged downwards, staining your once white suit with a red streak. With one quick motion, she sliced the seam of your pants and pushed your underwear to the side. Her bloodied fingers were warm against your skin.

“Why?” you croaked.

Ellie pouted mockingly, “Uh, because I can?”

Typical sick, twisted answer.

Her knife pressed against your neck again and her lips ghosted yours. One finger pressed into you and your walls clamped around her. You tried not to think about how Tommy’s blood was a perfect lubricant. Her thrusts were slow and teasing; you almost wanted to beg for her to go faster.

“What, am I not fuckin’ you right or something, baby?” Ellie questioned. “Or are you always this silent?”

“Is this how you normally fuck girls?” you smiled at how that upsetted her. “I guess you’re just bad at-” you choked on your words as Ellie found that sweet, pleasurable spot. Your knees buckled and Ellie was forced to hold you upwards as she slipped another finger inside and relentlessly drilled into you.

“Bad at sex, huh?” she shook her head in disbelief that someone would say that. “Says the bitch that can’t even hold themselves up because I’m fucking them too good.”

She grabbed onto your throat; her knife dug into your skin and she forced you to look at her. She knew you were close from how you desperately clenched around her fingers and moaned louder.

“Please.” you begged.

“Please, what?”

Maybe if your brain wasn’t so clouded, you would’ve begged for your life. “Please, let me cum.”

Ellie shrugged and her thumb pressed against your clit. The final bit of pleasure you needed. You shuddered against her hold and your head fell against the wall. If Ellie had given you a few extra seconds, you would’ve thanked her. Unfortunately, she sliced your throat, paralysing your vocal cords and making you choke on your own blood. You collapsed to the ground and clawed at your throat.

“Idiot,” she huffed.

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams smut #ellie williams x fem!reader #melwrites #ellie williams fanfic

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lost-in-fandoms · 5 months ago

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Daniel takes sugar baby!Max for a spin on a very nice car. This comes from nowhere and goes nowhere. 700 words of no plot just vibes. (Disclaimer: I don't know anything about cars).

"This is...a car."

Max wishes he could take back his words as soon as they're out of his mouth, but in his defense he was asleep until 5 minutes ago and now he's standing in front of a 1963 Ferrari Spider that looks like right out of a movie. And he hasn't even brushed his teeth.

Daniel laughs, pushing his sunglasses up into his tousled hair, one arm draped over the back of the free seat to lean towards Max, the picture of perfect relaxation.

"Sure is, baby! Are you coming for a spin?"

It's only because Max knows him that he feels the doubt hiding right under the light tone of his voice, and it's yet another ridiculous thing Daniel does. As if Max would ever say no to him.

"Give me a second," he says, because he's insane, instead of jumping straight into the car.

He rushes back upstairs, thanking his reflexes for reminding him to grab the keys while he had been stumbling out of the door, still blinking sleep out of his eyes, Daniel's voice saying come down, baby, I've got something to show you! ringing in his ears.

He brushes his teeth as quickly as he can while hunting for some clothes that aren't the faded t-shirt and shorts he wore to bed, and then attempts to flattens his hair while tugging a sweater on. Two minutes later he's flying down the stairs again, still pocketing his wallet and keys, one shoe untied.

Daniel is on the phone when Max closes the building's door behind his back, but he smiles brightly, gesturing at him to get in the car.

Max takes one extra second to just run his hand along the passenger side door before opening it, sinking in the leather seat with a sigh. Everything feels expensive. He feels expensive.

It's not the first time he's been this close to this amount of money since he's started this...thing with Daniel, but he doesn't love helicopters and fancy meals as much as he loves cars.

"Ready to go, or do you need one more minute?" Daniel's voice startles him from where he'd been staring at the details on the dashboard, and he feels himself blush, feeling once again way too dumb to be allowed outside. He hadn't even realised Daniel had finished his phone call.

"Fuck off," he says, automatic, before blushing deeper. Daniel only laughs though, and reaches for his leg, squeezing his thigh.

"We have time baby, don't worry," he jokes. There's something in his voice though that tells Max that if he was to ask for ten more minutes idling at the curb just to be able to stare at every piece of the car, Daniel would be happy to say yes.

It knocks the breath from his lungs more than the car had. Well, maybe not more, but close enough.

"Where are we going?" he asks, finally buckling in and turning his head to meet Daniel's eyes through the sunglasses that have been lowered again.

"Just for a drive, and then if you still have time for me, for lunch."

Again, as if Max would say no.

When the car comes to life, Max shivers, the purr of the engine making his spine tingle, and Daniel laughs again.

"Knew you'd like it," he says.

Max doesn't reply, too scared to open his mouth and have a moan come out instead of words. Daniel's hand returns to his thigh, higher than before, and Max knows it's impossible to hide how he's half hard. He shivers again.

"Do me a favor?"

Max looks at Daniel again, already nodding, and grabbing his phone when the other points at it.

"What am I doing?" he asks, unlocking Daniel's phone without having to ask for the password, his fingerprint working giving him yet another satisfied thrill.

"Find me the fastest route to go somewhere isolated in the hills, will you?"

Max frowns, confused, but navigates to the maps app obediently.

"How isolated?"

"Isolated enough that I can fuck you on the car's hood."

Max drops the phone.

#maxiel #my writing #was listening to a song and this appeared in my brain #so it doesn't matter if it's nothing because it wasn't meant to be anything in the first place

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sickskz · 20 days ago

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LEE KNOW EMETO LEE KNOW EMETO LEE KNOW EMETO LEE KNOW EMETO LEE KNOW EMETO….good talk!

I gotcha 💪🏽🫡

So... I had to take a little break off of 'Breaking point' (too much hospitals in my real life rn lmao) and I ended up writing this instead!

Something a little lighter, a little funnier, a little sweeter 💕🙂‍↕️

Plus, the amount og LK emeto requests has been insane (love it), so I hope this will be able to satisfy some of the many sickfic hungry souls out there! 🤣✨

Thank you again for your patience🫶🏽 (and yes, the breaking point finale will be finished one day. I am not abandoning it🫡)

Alt Title I thought of for this: Han Jisung and the philosophers fever ✨🤣

Domestic Delirium

Sickie: Lee Know

Caretaker/s: Han

————————————————————————

It all started with Minho insisting he was fine.

Literally. He didn’t even lead with a hello, a good morning, anything…

He just started the day with just that dumb little phrase, "I'm fine", the tone in his voice almost defensive.

Things didn’t usually go well when Minho started the day insisting he was fine above everything else. He’d shown up to dance practice looking unnaturally pale, his eyes a little sunken, and his posture hunched.

Everyone saw it, the way he held himself whenever he thought no one was looking, but no one dared say anything. Not at first.

Within the second hour of practice, Minho was looking worse by the minute. He was visibly shaking, doubling over between songs and breathing through gritted teeth. His steps were heavier, less precise, and it looked like he was barely holding on by a thread.

Of course they could tell he wasn’t ‘fine’. Jisung could tell, and he could see the way Chan never let the poorly member out of his sight.

When Minho finally cracked, sprinting to the trash can and heaving his breakfast into it during a run-through of ‘Walking On Water’, there was no use for him to keep resisting.

While the music effectively drowned out the sound of his misery, Chan approached Jisung with the four sacred words that would seal the rest of their day:

“Take him home. Now.”

—

The drive back to their dorm was a blur of muffled groaning and retching. Minho’s forehead pressed against the cooling window, a sick bag clutched in his hands, beads of sweat trailing down the side of his face…

Jisung sat beside him, rubbing his back in a feeble attempt to offer some measure of comfort while he sent increasingly dramatic texts to the group chat.

The heat radiating off the dancer made Jisung’s skin crawl, and he couldn’t even begin to fathom how Minho had been standing upright at all.

[12:47 PM] Jisung: he is so not okay [12:47 PM] Jisung: Lino hyung is melting

[12:48 PM] Chan: MELTING?? [12:48 PM] Jisung: okay maybe not literally [12:48 PM] Jisung: but like… emotionally, spiritually [12:48 PM] Jisung: and a little physically too I think

[12:49 PM] Jeongin: Y i k e s [12:49 PM] Hyunjin: …good luck with that

[12:52 PM] Jisung: oof he threw up again [12:52 PM] Jisung: driver does NOT look happy bout it

[12:55 PM] Jisung: he’s really got one hell of a fever [12:55 PM] Seungmin: is he talking in riddles yet

[12:56 PM] Jisung: no not yet [12:56 PM] Jisung: I’ll let you know when he does

[12:58 PM] Jeongin: I wonder if he’ll theorise about overthrowing the government again.

By the time they arrived at their dorm, Minho was barely able to stand upright, hanging off Jisung like melting wax on a candlestick.

Jisung fumbled with the key in the lock while he tried to keep them both balanced, muttering. “Hold on a a little longer, hyung…”

Once the door finally clicked open, the two of them stumbled across the threshold.

Jisung quickly steadied Minho to the best of his ability, catching him just as his knees buckled slightly beneath him. With a quiet huff of effort, Jisung kicked the door shut behind them and guided Minho to sit down in a chair.

The dorm was quiet, aside from the faint hum of the fridge and the gentle whir of the ceiling fan above. It was entirely different from the chaos of practice, and Minho felt like the serenity alone could put him to sleep right then and there.

But sleep wasn’t a luxury he could afford just yet.

“I swear, hyung…” Jisung muttered, his voice tight with a mixture of concern and frustration. “if you pull something like that again, I’m gonna have to duct tape you to your bed.”

There was something disturbingly genuine about the threat, as if Jisung had already planned it out in detail.

Through his fevered gaze, Minho really couldn’t tell if he was joking or not.

It felt far too niche and specific to be a simple jest, and the more Minho looked at Jisung, the more he realised how dead serious he appeared to be. He managed a half-hearted scoff.

“Are you threatening me…” Minho slurred, blinking up at Jisung sluggishly. “Or offering to redecorate?”

“Both.” Jisung replied instantly, deadpan, not even a shred of hesitation in his voice.

Minho frowned, though it was weak and tired, barely more than a twitch. His mind felt too foggy to think straight, but the sincerity in Jisung’s voice had a strange, unnerving weight to it. “You wouldn’t…”

Jisung’s expression softened slightly, but his voice remained firm. “Don’t test me, Lee Minho.”

Minho didn’t know whether he was supposed to be scared, amused, or both. His lips twitched in what might’ve been a weak attempt at a smirk.

“Hmmm… Maybe I’ll like it.”

Jisung rolled his eyes, his resolve cracking just enough for a small smile to grace his lips. “Oh my god.. shut. up.”

Minho kind of wanted to laugh, but his breath only came out in a soft, pained sigh. It was becoming increasingly difficult to focus on anything other than how sick he felt; how much he was shaking, and how completely his stomach seemed to have turned on him.

With an exasperated sigh, Jisung knelt down, slipping off Minho’s shoes one at a time. The older of the two sat in silent compliance, watching his roommate with an unreadable expression. He just wanted to sleep.

“Come on..” Jisung said, holding out his hands toward Minho once he was done. “To the couch we go.”

Once Minho was safely situated on the couch, Jisung tucked a soft blanket around his legs, ensuring the warmth would seep into his chilled body without worsening the fever. "Good?"

A hum of acknowledgement left Minho's throat, the shivers running down his spine making his teeth chatter. The room felt colder than usual, the air too still, but the blanket was a small comfort.

“Wait here.” Jisung commanded, standing back up. “I’ll go get you some water.”

Minho just groaned in response, folding his arms over his chest and letting his eyes slip shut.

Where would I even go, he thought bitterly.

Jisung didn’t just get water.

Once he got to the kitchen, he got preoccupied, his mind traveling a million miles an hour. Alongside the water, Jisung grabbed some medicine, a bucket, and brewed up a cup of soothing peppermint tea.

It took a little longer than just grabbing some water would have, but at last, he was pleased with his efforts. With a concentrated look on his face, he returned to the living room.

“Iriiinooo-… oh” Jisung stopped dead in his tracks once he rounded the corner to see Minho lying on the floor, his feet elevated on the couch. “…..What are you doing?”

“Watching a movie.”

Jisung blinked. The TV was on behind him, sure, but Minho’s eyes were very clearly fixed on the ceiling.

“Okay..” Jisung approached him carefully, immediately sensing that something wasn’t right. “Watching a movie in the ceiling..?”

Minho huffed. “I have a very impressive imagination…” he retorted, as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

Jisung raised an eyebrow, then nodded slowly. “Right. Or you’re hallucinating…” he muttered the last part under his breath, crouching down beside him and brushing a few stray locks of hair off Minho’s forehead.

He really was burning up…

Minho made a weak sound of protest, but Jisung managed to get him back up on the couch without too much of a hassle.

A bit of effort and a knee accidentally kicked into Jisung’s chest later, Minho finally fell asleep, entirely knocked out cold across the cushions.

Jisung decided to update the others.

[2:39 PM] Jisung: I have wrestled the tiger [2:39 PM] Jisung: think he may have bruised my rib [2:39 PM] Jisung: But he’s finally asleep. Mission accomplished. He is still very hot though

[2:40] Felix: simp

[2:41] Jisung: fever Felix he’s feverish

[2:42] Felix: …. [2:42] Seungmin: …. [2:42] Jeongin: ….

[2:43] Jisung: ok I get it guys you can stop now

[2:44] Hyunjin: simp <3 [2:44] Felix: :) <3

With Minho conked out on the couch, Jisung decided it was probably the right time to try his luck in the kitchen.

The plan was rice porridge. The kind of simple dish his mom always made him when he was sick as a kid. Gentle on the stomach. Hopefully edible, if everything went according to plan.

Jisung stood over the stove, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and the tip of his tongue poking out slightly as he stirred around the pot.

Cooking had never been his forte, and taking care of a sick hyung wasn’t exactly in his wheelhouse either. But Jisung was determined, stubbornly so, to do what he could.

As steam curled around his fingers, he sniffed the air and nodded to himself. The smell was… promising. Bland, but warm, not burnt.

That was a big win in his book.

Jisung was carefully ladling the porridge into a bowl, chewing on his lip in concentration when someone’s voice-undoubtedly Minho’s- startled him.

“Hey! What do you think you’re doing?”

Jisung froze, the ladle slipping from his grasp and clattering back into the pot.

For a split second, a wave of fear washed over him.

That didn’t sound like the kind of feverish muttering Minho had been doing at the walls earlier.

That was directed at something, or someone.

Was there someone else there? Had someone snuck in? No, he would’ve heard-

Heart racing, Jisung bolted out of the kitchen, a spoon clutched in his hand like a some sort of makeshift weapon. “Hyung?”

He skidded to a stop the moment he reached the hallway, taking in the sight before him.

There was Minho, teetering unsteadily on his feet, one hand braced against the wall, the other raised in a confrontational gesture. He was glaring down the entryway like he’d discovered an intruder.

Only there was no intruder.

There was only a coat rack.

And Minho himself, who was apparently descending to madness under the weight of his rising fever.

Jisung’s jaw went slack as he watched Minho stagger forward, pointing accusingly at the unsuspecting piece of furniture.

“Don’t think I’ll let this slide..”

Oh my god.

“Lino-hyung…” Jisung began, making his presence known. But Minho didn’t even spare him a glance, too busy staring down the coat rack like it owed him money.

Jisung glanced at the coat rack; unmoving and just as inanimate as ever before. “What’s…”

“He started it.”

“Hyung, that’s a coat rack.”

“Don’t patronise me. He insulted my mother.”

“Oh, that’s…” Jisung bit his lip, unsure whether to laugh or be alarmed. Probably both.

He took a careful step closer, almost like he was approaching a cornered animal. “That sucks. But let’s not pick fights right now, okay? You’re too sick…”

Minho wobbled a bit on his feet, eyes still fixed firmly on his new nemesis as if the spindly hooks were loading up to swing at him. “I can take him.” He protested.

“I’m sure you could, babes.” Jisung assured him gently, though his voice cracked with a hint of disbelief. “But I think we better get back to the couch before it calls for backup.”

“Hmmm.” Minho frowned deeply, unmoving. “‘don’t trust him…”

“Good instinct." Jisung commented. "But let’s interrogate him further when you’re feeling better, yeah?” He looped an arm around his delirious hyung’s back and began steering him away.

Minho didn’t resist, but he kept glancing over his shoulder like the coat rack might come for him the second he turned his back.

“Acoat Rack… weird name… Is he not from here?” Minho slurred his questions like his lips were having a hard time parting.

"Uuuhhh, no, I think he's..." Jisung paused, glancing back at the poor piece of furniture, who had been deemed an enemy despite its innocence. "Swedish."

He was pretty sure they had bought it from IKEA, at least.

Minho hummed solemnly in agreement. "Checks out... y'know him?"

Jisung just shrugged meekly.

“I've seen him around.”

As they passed by the kitchen, Jisung’s gaze drifted over to Minho’s face just in time to see his expression shift.

There was a subtle crease in his brow, a sudden tightness around his lips that had taken Jisung’s years to discern. It was almost imperceptible to most, but he knew Minho well enough to catch it.

Oh no.

Jisung’s heart dropped. He knew that look all too well. It was the look that told him Minho was about to hurl, and time was sparse.

“Hyung, no—” Jisung’s voice was sharp and he yanked Minho’s arm, urgency lacing his tone. He swirled them around in a one-eighty, instantly discarding the initial plan of returning to the couch.

Minho blinked sluggishly as he swivelled around, a guttural sound reverberating up his throat in response.

“Crap.” Jisung hissed under his breath.

“Bathroom. Lino-hyung, bathroom—” He said urgently, grabbing onto the sick dancer’s arm and pulling him in the right direction.

Jisung kicked down the bathroom door and hauled Minho inside with all the strength he could muster. He barely had time to guide the latter over to the toilet before the floodgates opened.

It wasn’t as seamless as Jisung would have wished for. The first round of sick spilled halfway across the tiled floor and the toilet rim itself, but fortunately, most of it was contained.

Jisung exhaled sharply through gritted teeth, placing a hand on Minho’s back in his best attempt to offer some support despite feeling entirely out of his depths. “Aigoo…”

The sickening, wet sound of vomit splashing in water filled the bathroom, and Jisung frowned deeply as Minho hugged onto the toilet, coughing and spluttering.

His body shook with each heaving breath, but Jisung stayed close, murmuring reassurances he wasn’t even sure Minho could hear.

“It’s okay, hyung… I’m here, just breathe.” Jisung said quietly, rubbing his hand in slow, soothing circles across Minho’s sweaty back.

Minho groaned pitifully once the vomiting subsided, and Jisung’s heart broke a little more with each laboured breath and groan that left him.

“That’s it…” Jisung breathed out softly, brushing some hair out of Minho’s sweaty face. He flushed the toilet and shifted a little, guiding Minho to lean against the wall.

The dancer sagged against it bonelessly, almost like his body was made of dough, and Jisung scowled deeply as he studied his sickly complexion.

Minho’s skin was even paler than before, sweat dotting his forehead, and his eyes dazed and glassy with fever.

Jisung’s voice was soft and steady as he spoke again, rubbing a hand up and down Minho’s arm to rouse him. “I’ve got you, Irino. It’s okay. We’re almost done, yeah? Just hang on a little longer.”

Minho managed a small nod, and Jisung quickly stood, grabbing a damp washcloth from the sink before returning right back to the sick man’s side.

He wiped Minho’s face carefully, trying to offer whatever solace he could, even though it felt like a small gesture in the midst of it all.

Minho looked up at him, eyes wide and glossy. “‘Made a mess…” he muttered shakily.

Jisung’s lips twitched up in a reassuring smile. “Yeah, you sure did.” He admitted, inwardly cringing as he cast a quick glance at the mess that still coated the floor and toilet. “But it’s okay.. don’t worry about that… I’ll clean it.”

Minho furrowed his brows and gave a small, dubious grunt.

Jisung paused his ministrations, retracting his hand from Minho's face. “Hey, be nice.” he warned, already sensing what was going through the dancers head. “Don’t you dare doubt me..”

Minho just narrowed his eyes a little, gazing at him skeptically as he slowly, very slowly slid further down the wall.

Jisung raised his brows, incredulous and indignant as he watched Minho distrust him. Silently, but unmistakably so.

After everything he had done for him?!

“Hyung, I know how to clean!” Jisung protested, his voice a little too much of a whine. Minho still didn’t look convinced.

He had to grit his teeth to keep from defending himself further. Now wasn’t the time to argue about his cleaning skills. Not when Minho was at the brink of collapse.

Instead, Jisung slowly exhaled through his nose and grabbed Minho by the shoulders, pulling him forward until his feverish forehead bumped against his shoulder. “Let’s just get you back to the couch, okay? Don’t worry about the mess..”

Minho had quieted down for a while after the bathroom incident, his stomach a little more settled, and a faint rosy colour finally returning to his cheeks.

After cleaning up the spillage and getting Minho wrapped into a human burrito on the couch, Jisung had finally went back to fetch the porridge.

It was still warm enough, and the smell remained just as underwhelming and plain.

Unfortunately, his attempts at coaxing the sick man to eat didn’t make it very far. He tried, at first, but Minho’s feverish mind had other plans.

Jisung was, for the lack of better word, silenced.

Food was of least importance when Minho’s mind spiralled into feverish, philosophical wormholes.

It had started with something about the moon and its significance in Minho’s life. “I’m the moon, Jisungie.” he had said, and Jisung gave him a hesitant thumbs up in return.

Time moved at a snail’s pace, Minho kept blabbering nonsense, and Jisung felt like his brain was going to melt out of his ears any second now.

“-so I couldn’t touch it, because it was blue and not spiky enough to be significant…”

Minho had been rambling on in a feverish frenzy for the better part of the last hour, and Jisung had long since stopped paying attention to his words.

He sat on the floor, back against the couch, spoon in one hand and the now fully cold porridge bowl balanced on his knee.

Minho had eaten a total of maybe four spoonfuls of it in between his effusions, but that was enough for now. It was better than none at all.

Now, as Minho continued spilling his every thought, Jisung could only nod along, staring dead ahead like he was dissociating mid-shift at an underpaid customer service job.

Jisung had deliberately stopped listening after Minho declared that one of his cats harboured the soul of an ancient Chinese emperor.

According to him, Doongie had ‘a very commanding aura’, and ‘once knocked over a candle during Lunar New Year, which was symbolic.’

Jisung had simply nodded and moved on with his life.

Listening to a feverish Minho was like listening to an introvert after one too many beers— low filter, and every little thought leaking out in a consistent flow.

Once he started his delirious ramblings, he became a one man podcast with no concept of time... or anything, really.

“Jisung-ah.” Minho said softly, breaking through Jisung’s trance and making him turn his head towards him, blinking slowly to recalibrate.

“Did you know a shrimp’s heart is in its head?”

Jisung stared at him, feeling his very last brain cell slowly dissolve into the sea of nonsense and oddly specific facts Minho had been spewing for the past hour.

Minho stared back, waiting expectantly, as if this fact was of critical, life-altering importance.

“Hyung.” Jisung said, deadpan and admittedly, maybe a little impressed. He’d heard the fact about shrimps before, somewhere, but it had long since slipped from his brain.

How Minho remembered it, even when deathly ill, was beyond him. “You’re… how do you just know stuff like that?”

Minho let out a small, breathy laugh that quickly devolved into a soft groan as his stomach cramped again. “The little man in my brain must’ve Googled it… he does that sometimes.”

Jisung furrowed his brows, letting out a resigned sigh as he resumed his spot with his back against the couch. His brain was completely fried.

“Right. The little man…” he muttered softly, reaching his hand back to check Minho’s temperature again, pressing his fingers to his forehead.

Still burning hot. Still very much not in his right mind.

This was going to be a long day.

When Minho didn’t say anything for a while, maybe that should have been a red flag in of itself. But honestly, Jisung was too blissed out by finally having some peace, that he couldn’t bring himself to break the silence.

Then, the first sound came, loud and demanding of both their attention.

Grrrgggrrnk.

Jisung slowly turned his head to look at Minho, eyes blown wide with concern. “Was that your—“

Minho's stomach answered for him before he could even finish the question.

GrrRRnnnkkk-GUHHHR.

The rumbling was loud enough to be alarming, and Jisung was already reaching for the bucket he’d placed on the end of the couch as Minho winced, clearly uncomfortable.

The older man had curled up into the most pathetic looking croissant Jisung had ever laid eyes on.

He was lying on his side, knees drawn slightly up toward his chest, one arm slung over his eyes while the other clutched at his stomach like it had personally betrayed him.

“Hyung?” Jisung turned to fully face Minho as he laid a hand on his shoulder, rubbing small circles into it with his thumb. The bucket was secured in his lap, just in case. “Are you okay?”

“The revolution…” Minho let out a pained sigh, not bothering to open his eyes. “‘y stomachs singing the song of its people…”

Jisung scoffed at that. “Well… It’s a terrible singer, then.” He declared earnestly.

And he meant it, too. If Minho’s stomach truly was singing, then it would have to be somewhere within the genre of deathcore, that was for sure.

Minho huffed out a short “Rude”, but the tension in his face betrayed his agony, and it made Jisung’s heart ache. He shifted closer and moved his fingers to brush tenderly against Minho’s feverish cheek. “Seriously… are you okay?” He tried again.

Minho stilled for a moment, tense, then let out a strained sigh. “…no.”

It was such a simple, defeated answer. Just no. It strayed so far from the usual ‘I’m fine’ display Minho put up that it made Jisung’s chest tighten with concern.

“Jesus… you’re being honest, you must be feeling really bad..” Jisung remarked incredulously, trying to bring a little light to the situation.

But then he paused, his concern deepening when Minho winced, curling further in on himself. “Does it hurt?”

Minho gave a small, barely-there nod.

Jisung scowled, taking in the fresh sheen of sweat that beaded across Minho’s forehead. “Where? Just cramping or…?”

Minhos response was delayed, as if his brain was working in slow motion all of a sudden, rather than conjuring up an array of unhinged ideas.

“All of it.. ’s like… tight, and sharp… and-“ Minho broke off, scrunching his face up with a groan. “Just.. hurts.”

As if to confirm, his stomach let out a miserable, squelching sound of protest.

The younger man winced in sympathy, and Minho let out a whimpering noise that hit Jisung like an actual punch in the gut.

“Oh, baby…” he whispered breathlessly, eyes betraying his conflict as he desperately wracked his mind for any way to help.

Jisung grabbed the blanket that had slid off Minho’s body and carefully pulled it back up, tucking it in gently around his shoulders.

Then, almost without thinking, he reached his hand under the blanket and laid it lightly over Minho’s—right where it was pressing into his stomach.

At first, Minho froze at the sudden contact, but the tension ebbed quickly. He twisted his torso slightly, just enough to allow Jisung better access to the aching spot.

It wasn’t just permission, but a silent plea for help.

“Tell me if it hurts too much..” Jisung murmured, eyebrows pulled together in concentration. As he shifted closer, readjusting his hand, Minho nodded faintly in return.

Jisung began to rub, careful and deliberate, hoping to provide if only just a shred of relief. The tension beneath his palm was impossible to ignore; taunt muscles pulsing with each wave of discomfort.

Jisung moved his hand in small circles, his touch gentle, as though he was afraid he’d start a new uproar if he wasn’t tactful enough. He probably would, too.

At first, the effort seemed fruitless, but then… Minho’s breathing eased, his face relaxed, and a small, quiet sigh escaped his lips.

That was all the motivation Jisung needed to keep going. He continued the small massage, patient and resolute, until his own hand started cramping in protest.

Eventually, Jisung had to stop, flexing his fingers with a soft wince. He listened in on Minho’s breathing; steadier now, easier.

“Better?” He whispered, hopeful.

A gentle ‘Mhm..’ was all he got in return, low and tired, but he was pleased with that.

Jisung nodded softly, relief settling across his face. “Good..”

He let his hand linger on Minho’s stomach a moment longer, soaking in the warmth. Then, slowly, he withdrew. “You should try to get more sleep, baby.. It’ll help...”

Minho paused, still and quiet, like he was debating whether to surrender to sleep or to resist, just so he could bask in Jisung’s comfort a little longer…

At last, Minho patted the couch lightly. It was a wordless gesture, a quiet request, but it was received loud and clear.

Without hesitation, Jisung climbed onto the couch and stretched out beside him, propping himself up on his elbow. He decidedly stayed atop of the blanket, as the feverish heat radiating off Minho was more than enough to keep him warm.

Jisung reached his free hand up to run through Minho’s damp hair once more, watching the dark strands sluice past his fingers like threads of silk.

Minho was facing him, but his chin was tucked in, so Jisung could only see him from above. A rare vantage point, honestly.

His eyes flitted over the details of Minho’s face; the dark lashes brushing against pale cheeks, the sharpness of his nose, the red flush that had settled high on his cheekbones.

Jisung stilled for a moment. He studied Minho’s face intently, like he was either a piece of art, or some otherworldly, horrific entity.

To Jisung, Minho had always been a fine mix of both, anyways.

But now, on top of all that, he just looked.... miserable.

Jisung hated that.

He hated seeing his best friend so washed out and pitiful, entirely stripped of his usual energy and charisma.

In place of a mischievous smirk, a permanent scowl had carved its way into Minho’s lips, and where there was usually a snarky remark, only the faintest whimper tucked between clenched teeth.

It left Jisung feeling lost, helpless and frustrated with his inability to ease Minho’s discomfort.

If only he had some magical way to make it all vanish… like in the wizarding world of Harry Potter, where the flick of a wand or a whispered incantation could miraculously wipe away the pain.

But unfortunately, this wasn’t fantasy. There were no potions, no magical spells to serve as a miraculous quick fix.

Just Jisung, with a head full of hopes and wishes that Minho would wake up tomorrow feeling more like himself again.

“‘bet you’ll cry t’most at my funeral…” came the raspy voice from below, pulling Jisung from his thoughts. He could’ve sworn Minho had finally drifted back to sleep, but today truly seemed to be a day of surprises.

Jisung's hand paused in Minho’s hair as he blinked down at him, expression caught somewhere between disbelief and exasperation.

“Yah… Don’t say stuff like that.” He chided, a pout forming on his lips. He reached down and gave Minho a half-hearted flick on the forehead.

Well, flick was generous. It was more of a gentle tap, really.

Minho already looked so despondent and small, Jisung had no intention of making it worse. The sentiment behind the gesture still stood, anyways.

Minho merely hummed a flat note in return.

Jisung sighed deeply. “You’re probably right, but..” he hesitated, considering his words. “I’d rather not think about your funeral… You’re not going anywhere. Not for a long time.”

“‘Dunno that…” Minho retaliated, exhaling through his nose. “Tick, tock, tick, tock…”

Ah, there it was. That familiar dark humour, always tinged with just the right amount of dramatics. Grim, yes— but so very Minho.

And honestly?

If Jisung was to endure another day with this scrappy version of his Minho, at least there was some comfort in knowing that not all of his usual attributes had been burned away with the fever.

“Stop being so dramatic..” Jisung said softly, allowing his hand to resume its ministrations through Minho’s hair, nails scratching lightly at his scalp.

It was already a tight fit with both of them on the couch, but Minho shifted himself closer anyway, drawn to the comfort like a moth to a flame.

Though truthfully, if anyone was the flame in this moment, it was Minho, who was as still radiating heat like a furnace.

They lay there, tangled in silence.

Jisung’s thoughts kept drifting, skipping through the day’s events in no particular order. The knowledge that he needed to get Minho some medicine kept nagging at him, but he pushed the thought aside for the time being.

Right now, this—his presence, their closeness—would have to suffice.

Jisung wasn’t above a few stolen cuddles either, and while it broke his heart to see Minho in pain, being the one to hold him through it felt like a small blessing.

It was still early in the evening, but as Minho’s soft breaths ghosted warm against his chest, Jisung could feel the drowsiness begin to settle in his bones.

With a tap on his phone, the living room was dimmed to a golden hush, and Jisung settled in. He held Minho a little tighter, grounding himself in the weight, in the familiar scent of his shampoo, and the hope that tomorrow would be better than today.

Jisung’s eyes strayed towards the hallway before they closed, quietly making a mental note to move the coat rack out of sight next time.

Just in case.

-END-

Bonus: Sometime the next day

[11:44 AM] Jisung: I think his fever is going down [11:44 AM] Jisung: he’s been sleeping a lot though which is good I think [11:44 AM] Jisung: but he tried starting a fight with the coat rack yesterday

[10:45 AM] Seungmin: come again??

[10:46 AM] Jisung: yea it was pretty bad

[10:48 AM] Jisung: oh and he thought the police was coming for him this morning [10:48 AM] Felix: police???? [10:48 AM] Jisung: yup. he heard the microwave beeping

[10:49 AM] Jeongin: I'm not seeing the connection..

[10:50 AM] Jisung: idk he thought it was a siren ig

[10:51 AM] Chan: unbelievable [10:51 AM] Chan: anyways. I’ll be dropping by your place with some soup around lunchtime :) [10:51 AM] Chan: take care until then. you've done good, Hannie <3

#stray kids sickfic #skz sickfic #kpop sickfic #sickfic blog #stray kids fluff #stray kids sick #sickfic #stray kids #skz fluff #skz #sick lee know

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lalacliffthorne · 2 years ago

Text

🌪 idiot 🌪

Azriel x Reader

summary: a fight gets out of hand, and suddenly, everything's turned upside down

notes: this one is a slight emotional rollercoaster, people, so - you know, prepare. this was actually planned to turn out totally different, but the second I started writing, it just completely ran away with me and basically took on a life of it's own, and who am I to fight that. also. uhm. pretty much half of it is smut. yeah. so. you go have fun. I need a cold shower.

______________________________________________________________

I wasn't quite sure how it had happened.

One second, I had been yelling at Azriel, feeling anger and frustration tear at my chest as the shadowsinger glared at me, rage burning in his eyes as they pierced into mine.

The next, his hands were buried in my hair, his chest pressing into mine as he pushed me backwards and kissed me like a male starving.

Training had been shit. Cassian hadn't been there because he was on border patrol for Rhys, so for once, no one was there to keep Azriel from pushing and pushing.

He had followed me after, his deep voice cool and cutting like his knives when he had counted down the many ways I had failed, would have died in a real fight.

It was always like that - me somehow never being able to do anything right in his eyes. But for some reason, this time, it had been the last straw on a shitty morning, and so it had turned into a screaming match as soon as he had yanked me into his room instead of letting me storm into mine to slam the door into his face.

Well, I had been screaming; frustration and anger and hurt of over a hundred years finally pushing past the surface to unload onto the shadowsinger.

Azriel had not even yelled, but his voice had still grown louder with every word, deep and vibrating with anger as his shadows swirled around him; to egg him on or to calm him, I couldn't tell.

At some point, he had stepped closer, towering over me and just making me angrier as I unleashed every ounce of fury I had bottled up about the way he'd been treating me since the very beginning, either ignoring me like I wasn't even there or reprimanding me, harsher than on anyone else.

It had all spilled out without me being able to hold it back, all of the frustration about how he was treating me laced with the anger and the hurt that was buried deep within as I stabbed my finger at his chest. All the while, he had just stared at me, something indiscernable in his eyes when I had finally ran out of words with a vibrating, angry sound and we both had just stared at each other for a long moment, breathing heavily, my insides twisting with anger.

And then he had leaned down, his lips crashing against mine, and without thinking, I had tugged him closer.

Which had led to where we were now. Azriel's hands stripping away my leathers as my fingers pulled at the buckles of his chest armor, trembling with what I told myself was the rage still burning in my chest. Rage that made me stretch and slip my hands into his hair to tug him down after pushing his armor off his shoulders as I kissed him back, feeling the world sway with the groan vibrating through his body as his hand gripped the back of my neck, tilting my head to kiss me harsher, more feverish, furious and somehow desperate.

Azriel's tongue swirled around mine, his breathing heavy as he pulled back just to tug my shirt over my head. His fingers started undoing my leather pants as his lips crashed onto mine again, messy and hot, and something lurched in my stomach as I scratched my nails down his chest, the deep sound leaving him causing something to twitch in my pulsing lower stomach as I started tugging on his pants.

The back of my knees hit the mattress; Azriel stopped himself from falling onto me when I pulled him with me, his hands pressing into the sheets next to my head, and his hips bucked up into mine.

A wave of heat washed through my lower stomach, my lips fell open, and Azriel groaned into the kiss, his body growing rigid as he rocked into me again.

A whimper tore from my throat when he latched his lips onto my neck, beginning to trail harsh kisses down my throat that made my back arch as his hips started grinding down into mine in a steady rhythm. My insides tightened so harshly, I whimpered again, more breathless as my fingers clawed at Azriel's shoulders and I rolled my hips to meet his.

Azriel's movements stuttered, and a deep, strangled sound broke from his throat. His grip changed, and my heart stumbled to a screeching halt when his rough hand closed around my breast the same moment his tongue ran over the other.

My breath hitched, my whole body turning into a hot, squirming mess when Azriel began palming my chest harshly, licking and sucking at my nipple as soft groans left him. I gripped his hair as I tried to fight the moans building in my throat, his warm tongue lapping over my skin, leaving my eyes rolling back into my head.

Dragging his lips down over my body, his breathing quick and rough, Azriel pulled down my pants and underwear in one, leaving hard kisses on every inch of skin he could reach. But they seemed to soften as his rough, scarred hands wrapped around my hips. His eyes moved up to meet mine, half-lidded and hazy, fogged over with something that made my hips twitch, and a soft whimper left my throat.

Azriel blinked, and something shifted in his expression. His gaze cleared a little as it flickered over my face, and suddenly, his throat worked, his jaw tightening. Then his grip around my hips changed, and the next second, I was flipped over onto my stomach.

My breath staggered, and I could feel something lurch in my chest when the shadowsinger dragged me over the mattress. But then his breath brushed over the back of my shoulder, and when his deep voice sounded next to my ear, it was soft and a little rough as he mumbled: “Hold on.”

Swallowing against the way my throat closed up, I reached out and gripped the headboard, and Azriel's hand pressed down onto my spine almost gently. My back arched, and his other hand tightened around my waist as he pushed my legs apart. Then I felt him shift, heard the sound of his leathers being pushed down, and my mouth parted soundlessly when the tip of his cock brushed over my folds.

Azriel exhaled raggedly as his rough fingers slid through the wetness of my pussy, then he gripped my hips tighter, and a strangled gasp left me when he slowly started to push in.

My head dropped forward, my insides fluttering, and Azriel's fingers dug into my hips, a strained curse slipping from his lips as his cock pressed against my walls, slowly working its way forward inch by inch. He was big, filling me in a way that made small whimpers leave me, and Azriel pressed a curse when my hips bucked back on instinct, his hand pressing onto my back, and I moaned breathlessly when the movement made him slip in deeper.

I didn't know how long it took until he finally bottomed out, but when he did, my eyes were fluttering, my knuckles white around the headboard. Azriel was breathing harshly, his hips pressed flush against mine, and I whimpered just from the feeling of him, so deep, filling what felt like every inch of my body.

Azriel's grip tightened, and his hips rocked harshly into mine. Then he started to move.

Breathing, something that was second nature, suddenly became difficult. Every thrust sent my body rocking forward, and I could feel the strain in Azriel's grip, like it required every ounce of control on his body to keep the hard, steady rhythm. Every thrust seemed to hit deeper inside of me, my body melting back with every harsh rock of his hips. My fingers burned with how tight I was gripping the headboard, my head tipped forward and lips agape without any sound leaving them as my insides fluttered, tightening with every time Azriel rolled his hips to meet mine, waves of pleasure crashing through my body.

The sound of sweaty skin meeting skin mixed with Azriel's harsh breaths, causing my head to roll to the side, breathless moans falling from the back of my throat, and every single one seemed to be followed by a stutter of Azriel´s hips and an even harsher thrust. I could feel my clit throb, my body heaving as I pushed back, back against his deep thrusts, and the movement caused him to hit something inside of me that made my insides coil. A gasp left me, my eyes rolling back, and just as my arms gave out, I was pulled up by my waist.

My heart staggered, stuttering when hands slipped over my torso, rough and calloused as they dragged me up. Then hot breath hit the side of my face, and an arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me flush against a hard, muscled chest.

My breath stumbled, something skipping high in my chest when Azriel's nose brushed against my cheek, arms gripping me tighter. Then his hips pushed forward to meet mine, and my head tipped back.

The new angle caused Azriel to slip in even deeper, and my eyes rolled back the same moment a strained sound left him, grip pulling me tighter almost frantically as he picked up his movements, every steady, hard thrust rocking his body into mine.

A choked sound left me as my insides tightened, my fingers clawing at Azriel's arm wrapped around my waist. I could feel every inch of his skin, hot and slick with sweat like mine as he pressed into me, his hands gripping harshly onto my skin, almost desperately. Something hot washed over my insides, tightening, and Azriel's lips grazed over the side of my neck, a deep grunt leaving him, causing my legs to almost buckle, and I reached out to desperately grab onto the back of his neck.

Azriel's movements stuttered, and my stomach jolted at the rough sound escaping the back of his throat, his thrusts growing harsher and more frantic. Like somehow, that one movement had kicked his control out of the window and he couldn't; wouldn't hold back anymore. His heavy, ragged breaths hit my cheek when he raised his head, and my heart flipped in my chest at the way his nose pressed against my temple, open lips dragging over my skin as his body rocked into mine, every push of his hips seeming to sink deeper, making my eyes roll back further. His hand gripped my breast, tugging and palming until I writhed in his grip, whimpering as I pressed my head back against his shoulder, and my mouth fell open when he hit that spot.

Azriel's body seemed to tighten, every muscle locking in place, and his pace grew desperate. Then his other hand slipped down from where it was gripping my waist bruisingly, and his rough fingers brushed over my clit.

A sound left me, so loud as it ripped from my throat, my nails scratching over his skin, but Azriel didn't seem to care, not when my hips bucked back into him and I could feel my insides tighten, tighten as he started circling my clit, changing between quick brushes and barely there grazes. My legs began to tremble, something white hot building in my stomach as moans and whimpers spilled from my lips as I squeezed my eyes shut and the knot wound tighter and tighter, Azriel's grip tensing like he could sense –

The tightness exploded, and a garbled sound left my lips, so loud, it echoed in my own ears.

Waves of white hot pleasure crashed over me, my hips grinding desperately as my legs shook and I felt myself drip as the whole world shook and heat rushed over me, over and over again as Azriel's hips snapped against mine and his arms gripped me so tight, I almost forgot to breathe. Then I could feel his thrusts stuttering before pushing deep, and Azriel's lips parted with a strangled groan as his body pressed into mine.

I didn't know how long I shook in his arms through the feeling of loosing all sense of who I was, my body melting into a puddle of hot tightening pleasure.

When I finally felt my limbs again, my mind slowly ceasing its spinning, Azriel was still thrusting, slow and steady, his sweaty chest pressed into my back as his grip loosened enough for me to feel the hot spots of skin where his arms had held me. My head lolled over his shoulder as I felt sweat run over my skin and my heart thumping against my chest, and Azriel's hand ran down my side, his hips stilling. I thought I felt him swallow, then he dropped his head and buried his nose in the crook of my neck.

My heart skipped once, but it was harsh as suddenly, dread took over every limb in my body.

Shit.

Azriel's arms slipped away from me, almost gently, and I dropped forward, catching myself on my hands when he slowly pulled out. An involuntary sound fell from my lips at the sudden feeling of emptiness, and something lurched in my chest.

There was an ache spreading rapidly in my chest, and suddenly, my eyes burned with pressure, my fingers shaking.

Shit.

I could feel the mattress move distantly, like Azriel had climbed off, but I couldn't focus, couldn't feel anything but the rising feeling of panic in my chest and the way my limbs started to tremble.

Shit, shit, shit.

Looking over my shoulder, I found the room empty, and something lurched in my chest, bile rising in my throat.

Of course he had left.

I quickly slipped off the bed, darting down to pick up the first piece of clothing I could reach. My body felt sticky, suddenly dirty in a way that made my stomach turn.

The ache in my chest surged as the expanse of what happened rushed over me, and my breath quickened frantically as pressure built in my throat.

I had fucked Azriel. The male that seemed to be annoyed by me more than not, that was either cold and ignoring me or harsh and unrelenting. And it had taken my breath with every second. Had turned the world upside down, had made every fiber of my being tremble with the way he had touched me.

The shirt I slipped over my head was way too big, and its smell hit me like a blow to the stomach. Hastily pulling my underwear back on and grabbing my clothes, I pushed myself to my feet, my knees shaking.

But before I could even take one step towards the door, Azriel appeared in the bathroom door.

My breath hitched, and my heart skipped painfully when he stilled.

For a second, we just stared at each other, my breath trembling as I fought the instinct to bolt and that ache in my chest that grew heavier. My gaze darted over the shadowsinger, the pyjama pants now hanging low on his hips and the towel in his hand that caused something to twitch in my heart in confusion for a second. His eyes looked almost soft as they pierced my own, and for a second, it seemed like a crease threatened to appear between his brows.

I blinked before hastily averting my eyes and mumbling: “I'm sorry, I'll just –“ The sound of my voice almost made me wince, hoarse and small, and I started hurrying towards the door.

But I only made it a few steps before a hand closed around my wrist, gentle but firm, and my heart darted into my chest as my head whipped up.

Azriel's eyes flickered over mine, and for a second, he looked like he was hesitating, a muscle in his jaw shifting. Then he blinked and lightly pulled on my hand, slowly turning me around as his gaze darted over my face, and his throat worked like he was trying not to swallow.

“I just - have to see –“, his deep, raspy voice broke, and my breath hitched when he seemed to take a breath and dipped his head.

My body froze when his nose lightly brushed over mine. Azriel's grip around my arm tightened when he stilled for a second, tension rippling through his wings. Then he bridged the last bit of distance.

A soft, trembling inhale made my shoulders rise when Azriel kissed me, slow and firm and gentle, causing my hand to reach out like instinct to grab onto his shoulder –

I gasped, and my fingers dug into Azriel's skin harshly when something tightened in my chest like a snap.

Heat bloomed under my ribs, right over my heart that fluttered wildly as something pulsed under my skin, something that tugged, pulled me towards the male in front of me who fell completely still, and I knew. Knew he felt it too, knew from the way the pull in my chest grew, like another had joined it, weaving together to form one single, strong bond.

Slowly, Azriel broke the kiss, and when I forced my eyes to open, breathing quickly, he was staring down at me, eyes wide, looking shaken and almost a little fragile.

“You're –“ My voice gave out, and something feverish seeped into the way Azriel's gaze flickered over my face, like he was trying to drink it in, commit it to memory. Then he swallowed.

“Hello, love.”

His deep mumble, rough and hoarse beyond reason sent shivers down my spine, and I felt my lips fall open, my heart rising into my throat as that thing in my chest pulsed, sending a chant through my body.

Mate. Mate. Mate.

I didn't know how long we just stood in the middle of Azriel's room, staring at each other while my heart fluttered achingly and that weight in my chest grew. The setting sun was seeping through the light curtains, dipping the bedroom into a soft, golden hue.

Azriel blinked, and his eyes softened, softened until the ache in my chest caused my breath to hitch when he took a step torwards me, and my heart skipped into my throat when he reached out to gently pry the clothes I still clung to from my grip.

Letting them drop to the ground without even sparing them a glance, Azriel's eyes flickered over my face as I stared up at him in a mix of fear and confusion. Then his hand lightly closed around my elbow, something fluttering high in my chest when his chest bumped into my shoulder, and Azriel gently nudged me towards the bathroom door, his breath brushing over the top of my head when he mumbled into my hair: “Come on.”

The bathroom was facing west like the bedroom, and I lost my breath a little when Azriel carefully pushed me through the door, the windows in the carved walls allowing the golden light to flood the room.

The shadowinger's hand was a gentle weight on the small of my back, just firm enough for the warmth of his palm to seep through the material of the shirt I was wearing. It caused the skin underneath to tingle, and I was almost glad that it slipped away when we reached the sink, because the urge to lean back into him had grown unbearable. Looking up at him over my shoulder, I felt my heart still before something began to rise in my chest.

The sunlight was casting a golden glow over Azriel's body. His face looked like someone had carved it from marble, the warm light causing his brows to crunch together almost indiscernably, emphazising the sharpness of his jaw and cheekbones, the straight line of his nose and his lips while somehow making all of his face look softer. And his eyes – his eyes looked like amber held into sunlight, bright and honey colored.

I missed Azriel stepping towards me, my eyes glued to his face as something thrummed violently in my chest. But then he leaned down; his hands slipped around the back of my thighs, and my heart jumped into my throat.

A soft sound of surprise left me, and I quickly clung to his shoulders when Azriel lifted me onto the counter.

The cold marble sent a jolt down my legs, making me shiver softly. The muscles in Azriel's shoulders shifted under my hands when he straightened up again, his breath grazing over my forehead, and when I looked up at him, his eyes were already on my face, warm in the golden light.

Suddenly, something seemed to close around my throat.

“I'm sorry.” The words left me before I could stop them, in a whisper that was soft and a bit weak, and the weight in my chest grew.

Azriel's brows twitched, and a crease slowly formed between them as he stared at me. Stared and stared until I gently shrugged one shoulder, mumbling: “I know how long you've been waiting for –“

A mate.

His mate.

I swallowed as my eyes flickered over his face, and something ached in my chest even as I tried a soft smile. “I know I was probably the last person you had in mind.”

Azriel stared at me, and there was a harsh tug in my chest, like he was trying to hold something back from rushing down the bond. Then a slow exhale left him, and he pressed his hands onto the counter next to my thighs, dropping his head.

My heart skipped softly in confusion when I stared at his hunched form, his wings twitching almost like he was in pain.

Azriel's fingers curled into fists. Then he straightened up again, running a hand over his face. His eyes found mine, and something flashed through them.

His jaw shifted; he blinked and moved forward, and my breath hitched when his hands slipped over the sides of my neck to cup my jaw. His thumbs brushed over my cheeks as Azriel stared at me, looking almost desperate when he said slowly, his deep, low voice rough: “Never say that again.”

My heart lurched in my chest, and my gaze flickered over his face in slight shock and uncertainty.

A muscle in Azriel's cheek shifted as his fingers flexed slightly, and his voice sounded strangely close to cracking when he mumbled hoarsely: “I should be the one apologizing.”

Suddenly, something blocked my throat, no matter how hard I swallowed.

Azriel's eyes moved over my face, and I could see the moment his jaw set like he was making a decision. Then he said roughly: “I'm sorry. I am so sorry I ever was stupid enough to make you believe I didn't like you. I am sorry I didn't listen when Cass and Rhys told me that I was making a mistake and that I would fuck it all up, and I'm sorry that I was an asshole. I treated you awfully, all because I – was scared.” His voice sounded pressed. “I was scared, because I don't hate you. I do not not like you.” His eyes darted over my face, and the muscle in his jaw worked. “I like you far too much. You make me feel things I have never felt before, want things I've never wanted before. And that scared the shit out of me.”

Azriel's throat worked like he was trying not to swallow. “I wanted to protect myself from what I thought was inevitable heartbreak, because there was no way someone like you didn't have a mate, someone better for you than me. Because if you somehow, miraculously felt the same, it would have been only a matter of time until you found that other person, and losing you after having you would have torn me apart. Even more than just never having you in the first place.” His voice rasped slightly. “So I pushed you away, ignored you.” His eyes searched mine, desperate, pained. “Because I was already in far too deep.”

I stared at him with wide eyes, trying to understand the words falling from his lips as something started fluttering against my ribs, quicker and quicker until my chest ached.

“You –“ My voice broke, weak and slightly trembling, and Azriel squeezed his eyes shut for a second like it caused him actual physical pain. It took away my breath, seeing him like this, every emotion visible on his face, completely off guard and vulnerable.

It was like finally, after centuries - his unmovable mask had dropped.

“I'm sorry.” Azriel sounded hoarse, his low, deep voice vibrating through my very bones when his hands slipped from the side of my neck, dropping to press against the countertop.

“I'm so sorry. I fucked everything up, and you have every right to be furious with me.“ He opened his eyes, and the pain in them took my breath. “When you yelled at me earlier – I realized how much I have actually hurt you. That I had taken my anger and my frustration about myself out on you.” He swallowed, his deep voice weak and rough when he mumbled: “I never meant to hurt you. And I still did. So – yell at me, scream at me, do whatever you want. I deserve it.”

My heart jumped into my throat, something thrumming and fluttering against my ribs as I stared at the stupid, stubborn, beautiful male in front of me. My breath hitched, trembling as I listened to that surging feeling in my chest, hot and wavering. Then I raised my hands, slipping them up his shoulders to cup the back of his neck.

Something flashed through Azriel's eyes as they darted up to meet mine, and my breath hitched at the way his amber iris flickered over my face as he slowly let me pull him towards me.

Swallowing softly, I raised my chin; my nose brushed against his, and I could feel Azriel freeze when I pressed my lips onto his.

There was a surge in my chest, rising and taking my breath away as my heart began to flutter against my ribs, quicker with every second.

Azriel's lips were warm, just like his skin under my hands where they were pressed against the sides of his neck. Then one of them slipped up into his hair before I could stop it, and a soft tremble went through Azriel's body, a quiet, hoarse sound breaking from the back of his throat.

My heart skipped into my throat, and suddenly, something tightened a little in my chest, because maybe just kissing him hadn't been the best idea, and maybe I should have –

I didn't realise I was beginning to pull back until one of Azriel's hands rose to cup the side of my neck. I almost whimpered at the feeling of his rough skin gently pressing against mine, the hum in my chest growing, and Azriel breathed out against my skin. His fingers slipped up to tangle gently in my hair as his lips brushed over mine for a second. Then he leaned in and kissed me, slow and deep, and a small sound built in my chest.

Azriel moved, his free hand sliding up my side to bury in my hair as well, and my fingers started to tremble at the way he tilted my head, his hips pressing into mine as his tongue lazily dragged over mine.

My hands slid down to his sides, my fingers digging into his skin, and Azriel groaned softly and quietly into my mouth, causing the flutter in my chest to grow into a humming, rising feeling.

By the time the shadowsinger slowly broke the kiss, the world seemed to spin, the only steady thing the male in front of me and his warm skin under my hands, his fingers curling into my hair and his hips pressed against the insides of my thighs.

Trying to breathe against my racing heart and the bond thrumming in my chest, I swallowed harshly, feeling Azriel's forehead press against mine and his heavy, ragged breaths hitting my skin. His fingers slowly loosened their grip far enough for his hands to slip out of my hair and to rest at the base of my neck, his thumbs brushing softly over my skin. Then he drew back, and forcing open my eyes, I felt something tumble in my chest when my gaze found his, his amber iris looking hazy in the warm golden light hitting his face.

“You're an idiot,”, I mumbled, my voice soft and rough. "A jerk, and an asshole, and an idiot."

I could feel Azriel's muscles shift under my touch as he swallowed, his wings twitching a little as his gaze darted over my face.

Breathing out softly, I felt something surge in my chest when I stared at him and his beautiful eyes, and my heart skipped when one corner of my lips rose, soft and hesitant and a little wobbly when I whispered: “But I guess you're my idiot now.”

Azriel stared at me, stared and stared as the setting sun enveloped him in a warm golden glow, his gaze swirling with a storm of emotions so tangled it was hard to discern them all. Then a slightly shuddering exhale left him, and his glassy eyes fluttered shut for a second when he dropped his head forward to rest it against mine. His thumbs brushed over my skin as his nose nudged against mine, and I could feel a wave of something so warm and strong pulse through the bond from his end, my heart missed a step.

For a moment, neither of us moved, breaths mingling, Azriel's wings shivering slightly as my thumbs brushed over his skin. Then I mumbled: "Az?"

A soft sound left him at his name falling from my lips, his grip tightening, and I furrowed my brows softly without opening my eyes, muttering: "Why did you bring me in here?"

I could feel the shadowsinger shift, then he pulled back his head, and when I raised my own, something fluttered against my chest as my eyes flickered over Azriel´s face, gods damned beautiful in the golden light, his gaze already dragging over me. Then he blinked and slipped his hands off my skin, and my heart lurched at the loss of contact, but Azriel just picked up the towel and turned on the faucet. Holding the fabric under water for a second, he turned it off again and returned to his place in front of me.

His hips nudged my legs apart, and my breath hitched when his warm, scarred fingers gently tapped against my knee, his eyes bright in the golden light when he mumbled, his low, deep voice like a soft brush down my spine: "You're sticky."

My heart skipped high in my chest, and a soft, croaky laugh broke from my lips as I stared at him, feeling warmth begin to bubble violently in my chest as suddenly, something fluttered against my ribs.

One corner of Azriel's lips turned upwards, and he watched me for a second, his eyes gleaming in the light. Then I lightly pushed my legs apart, and his scarred fingers slipped under my knee, lifting it gently as he began to clean my skin.

Something rose in my chest as I stared at the male before me, his head dipped down slightly and brows crunched softly as his scarred hand carefully bent my leg, the warm towel gently running over the underside of my thigh. A strand of hair was falling over his forehead, and suddenly, my fingers itched to brush it away.

I hesitated for a second, then I carefully tugged at that pulsing thing in my chest.

Azriel´s eyes darted up to meet mine, his grip nearly slipping on my thigh, and I felt something close around my throat.

"I can feel you,", I whispered.

Azriel's gaze moved over my face, and my breath hitched when a light formed in his eyes, bright like the warmth of the setting sun. Then he blinked, and one corner of his lips quirked softly.

"I'm not that big."

My heart skipped high in my chest, and an incredulous snort escaped me, quickly followed by wild giggles as I grabbed the towel from his hand and whacked him into the face, causing a slow grin to spread over Azriel´s face. Suddenly, the world seemed to slow as well as his smile became wider and wider until deep creases formed in his cheeks and his brightly twinkling eyes crinkled at the corners.

My breath faltered, hitched and trembled, and I stared at him, my heart fluttering wildly against my ribs.

"Idiot,", I whispered, and Azriel's eyes twinkled in the warm golden light.

"I know,", he mumbled, soft and hoarse.

My heart skipped as we stared at each other, Azriel's iris bright in the sinking sun and the corners of his lips curved upwards. Then he blinked, softly raising a brow.

"Can I get the towel back or do you want to hit me again?"

Warmth bubbled in my chest, the bond pulsing and surging, and I huffed, barely biting back a stupidly wide smile as I grumbled: "I think I've changed my mind; I'm not sure I want you as my idiot anymore."

Azriel's eyes moved over my face, and there was something in the way he was staring at me, a twinkle in his iris, face pooled in golden light and the hint of a crease in his cheek that made my heart stumble when he slowly shook his head.

"No, sweetheart." His gaze tracked mine, and his deep voice was a little husky when he mumbled: "I'm yours now."

The bond whispered, and something swelled in my chest, warm and fluttering as my throat closed a little.

"Promise?", I whispered and cursed the weakness of my voice. But Azriel just stared at me, eyes warm and steady as he reached out, hooking his pinky finger through mine and squeezing as he mumbled, deep voice hoarse: "Promise."

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x female!reader #azriel imagine #azriel/reader #az x reader #az imagine #az/reader #acotar x reader #acowar #acomaf #acotar #lalacliffthorne

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daisyvisions · 1 year ago

Text

Unspoken Words (Pt. 2)

➺ Pairing: best friend!Sangyeon x afab!reader x enemy!Hyunjae

➺ Summary: If someone were to tell you that you'd be in a fake relationship with the person you despise the most just to make your best friend jealous, you would've laughed in their face. But here you are... caught up in this exact situation.

➺ Word Count: 3.2K

➺ Warnings: Smut (18+, minors DNI) buckle up y’all, this chapter purely filth, fake dating, mutual pining, angst, jealousy, implied p in v sex, morning sex, oral (fem! receiving), fingering, tit sucking, marking, some hair pulling, lots of kissing once again, mentions of grinding, allusions to jerking off, pet name (sweetheart, baby), let me know if I missed anything!

➺ A/N: After five months… I am so sorry for taking this long. The lack of inspiration really hit me and I just couldn't seem to continue writing this series. But not to worry! Part 2 is finally here! Originally this was gonna be the final part but decided to extend it to maybe 1-2 more parts and this time I will NOT take a while to write! Proofread once, enjoy 😉

➺ Read Part 1 here!

➺ Network and tags: @deoboyznet @winterchimez @aimeecarreros @snowflakewhispers

“Hyunjae we have to go, we’re gonna miss our next class.” You giggle.

“Just a little longer-” He groans against the column of your throat.

It was hard to separate the two of you ever since that intimate night you shared. You found yourselves tangled in each other’s arms almost every other day, kissing each other until you were almost out of breath, and sneaking in a few stolen glances at one another when given the chance. It was like your trust in him grew as well as your friendship.

And even if you told yourself after that night that would be the only time you would allow Hyunjae to cross the line, you both knew it was a lie. And even if he never forced or coerced you into doing it again, it was you who wanted to experience everything you’ve been missing out on. Thank god he was well experienced in that field, since most of the time he took the lead and taught you everything you needed to know.

After all, you were just a girl with needs. And Hyunjae was more than willing to give you what you wanted.

And the way he treated you with utmost care, how he always made sure your pleasure came first before his, the way he looked at you like you were from another world, it was always overwhelming to you in a good way. Sometimes you had to mentally slap yourself in the face and remember that this is all fake. You two aren’t really together, and this is all just to make him jealous.

But somewhere deep down you knew that the more you spent time with Hyunjae, Sangyeon was slowly becoming a distant memory.

“Okay, five more minutes then we have to go okay?” You lift his chin up, his heavy lidded eyes looking at you so sweetly. You kiss the tip of his nose and let him continue with his ministrations.

His hands were gripping onto the softness of your hips while you gently grind your core on his semi-hard bulge, making sure you don’t rock your hips too hard to avoid the car from shaking. You feel his fingers digging into your skin further, a familiar signal that he wants you to roll your hips harder.

“Don’t want to go…” Hyunjae whines from beneath, pulling away from your neck to look up at you with those cute doe eyes. An expression you once thought was gross now has you going weak in the knees.

“C’mon, just a few more hours then I'll come over to your place after my last class, promise.” You caress his cheek.

“C-can you sleep over this time? Please?” He looks at you with pleading eyes. “We can watch a movie, set time to study and-”

“Hyunjae, we both know we won’t be able to study. We never do.” You tease.

“I’m studying your body does that count? Y’know… female anatomy and all?” You lightly slap him in the arm as he chuckles. “I should be getting an A+ in biology with you at this point.”

“Mhm, you sure would.” You kiss his forehead before getting off him. Both of you adjusting your clothes before getting out of the car.

“What about your roommate? Does he mind? Not gonna lie I was kinda embarrassed about last time. Couldn’t really look him in the eye when I came out of your room.” You look up at Hyunjae as you walk side by side.

“Nah, he won’t mind. He says your moans are hot so he’s cool with it.”

“Hyunjae!” You feel your cheeks warm up at the thought.

“What? Can you blame him?” Hyunjae shrugs.

“Please, I don’t want him to be thinking of me like that…”

“He doesn't, believe me.” He turns his head quickly after realizing what he had just said before you said anything in return. “Not because you aren’t attractive, because you totally are-” Your heart slightly flutters in the middle of his ramble.

"-Juyeon just has a high tolerance to that kind of stuff for some strange reason. Moans and sounds of sex don’t phase him at all. Unlike me, a little gasp or moan from you and I’m-” Hyunjae raises his hand, his finger gesturing an upwards motion as he makes a popping sound with his mouth.

The sound of you laughing at Hyunjae’s gesture brings a warm feeling bubbling inside his stomach, a sound he would never get tired of to be honest. But he’s totally unaware of the feeling as he’s too focused on how you smile at him.

“So 7:30? I can pick you up from yours, we can go out to eat quick then go back to my place.”

“I think I’ll just hitch a ride with you after class. Is it okay if I just borrow your clothes instead? Kind of lazy to go back home.” You ask.

Good thing your eyes were focused on looking ahead, because if you turned up to look at Hyunjae you would've seen the dust of pink showing on his cheeks. The thought of you wearing his clothes made him more flustered than he had cared to admit.

“Y-yeah sure. I’ve got extra towels, toothbrush, the works. Just text me when you’re done.” You nod as you both stop at the front of your classroom.

As he leans forward and slightly ruffles your hair he holds back the urge to kiss the top of your head and instead leans down closer to your ear to whisper,

“I’ll see you later sweetheart.”

The next morning you’re awakened by the feeling of the sun’s warmth slowly shining on your skin through the curtains. As you blink slowly, you feel a warm presence behind you, arms wrapped around your torso as Hyunjae’s breathing lightly touches the back of your neck.

Last night’s activities were replaying in your head once more as you start to fully blink your eyes open. You two wasted no time going at each other as soon as you stepped foot into his apartment, completely forgetting the movie and anything else you had planned out.

You loved little moments like this, being in Hyunjae’s arms, in his room, under his blanket as he held you close. It always gave you some sense of protection, especially when he would cuddle you to sleep and never let go.

You pry yourself free from Hyunjae’s embrace and decide to get up and make some coffee for the two of you, something you’ve grown accustom to whenever you’re at his apartment. Hyunjae groans in his sleep as you move, his hands subconsciously looking for your figure to hold again but you instead tuck him in gently and smile at the way he looks so peaceful right now.

Sleepiness hangs heavy on you as you go out of Hyunjae’s room, wearing nothing but his oversized shirt and your underwear beneath as make your way to the kitchen, eyes too droopy to even notice anything around you while you grab two mugs from the upper shelf and pop in the coffee pods inside the machine.

You subconsciously hum a tune while waiting for the coffee to fill the mugs, grabbing the milk from the refrigerator and the sugar from the pantry. As you continue to stir the milk and sugar inside the cups, you suddenly hear someone clear their throat behind you. As you turn around to see who it might be you suddenly gasp and wake up from your groggy state.

You see Sangyeon sitting by the counter with a coffee cup in his hand, staring at you with a look in his eyes that you’ve never seen before.

“Oh my god you scared me.” You hold your hand to your chest as you try to calm down. “Wait, what the hell are you doing here?” You ask him.

“I could ask you the same thing.” He takes a sip from his mug as his gaze stays on you.

“I-uh…” You pause for a moment. “Slept over.” You look down at your feet as you avoid looking at him.

“So you slept over here… You slept over at Juyeon’s?” He tilts his head in confusion. But deep down Sangyeon could feel jealousy bubbling within his stomach but also trying to hide the fact that he’s semi hard right now seeing you like this.

The way the shirt you were wearing rode up as you reached for the coffee mugs in the upper shelf, giving him a glimpse of your ass in the process. He nearly choked on his coffee mid sip from that. From all the years he’s known you he’s never seen your ass nearly on full display like that before.

And the way you bent down to get the milk from the refrigerator? He had to immediately avert his eyes before he got extremely hard at seeing the outline of your cunt beneath your underwear. But as he looked back at you after, he couldn’t help but notice the marks that were littered on your throat, making him visibly upset.

“Oh god no not Juyeon! I uh- well…” Before you could even continue, Juyeon suddenly appears in the room.

“Here are the books we need for our research on- oh! Hey!” Juyeon smiles at you. “You sleep well last night?”

“Y-yeah I did.” Your cheeks blush, suddenly becoming very aware at the fact of how exposed you are right now. “I gotta go. Talk later okay? Bye Juyeon and… Sangyeon.” You rush to get the two coffee mugs on the counter and head back to Hyunjae’s room. As soon as you close the door Juyeon turns to Sangyeon, whose eyes never left your figure ever since you walked in the kitchen.

“She’s a loud one I'll tell you that.” Juyeon says to Sangyeon as he lays the books on the table.

“Excuse me?” Sangyeon’s eyebrows pinch together.

“I mean, that must be a good thing right? She’s always loud whenever she’s inside Hyunjae’s room. Means he’s really taking care of her if you know what I mean” Juyeon smirks.

“H-hyunjae?” Sangyeon’s eyes widen.

“Yeah! Oh sorry, I forgot to tell you he’s my roommate. Anyway, yeah he always gets her making these really pretty noises. It happens so often that it doesn’t bother me at all. If only I find someone like that too.” Juyeon sighs

“Aren’t you two like best friends or something? Doesn’t she tell you where she goes?”

“No… She hasn’t.” Sangyeon mutters under his breath.

At first Sangyeon thought Juyeon was the reason why you were here, but now knowing it was Hyunjae and what Juyeon had accidentally revealed made him ball his fists together. The veins in his neck slowly popping as he clenched his jaw.

As you close the door behind you, you immediately put down the coffee mugs on the bedside table and sit at the edge of the bed, your eyes wide as ever as you internally freak out from the unexpected encounter with Sangyeon in the kitchen.

“Hey you.” You feel two arms wrap around your waist and a kiss on your shoulder.

“Hey…” Your voice shakes as you stare at the window in front of you.

“Did you make coffee for the two of us? You’re so sweet.” Hyunjae kisses your neck as he leans his chin on your shoulder.

“We have a problem.” You blurt.

“Hm? What’s wrong?” Hyunjae sits up and tries to get you to face him.

“Sangyeon he’s- he’s outside in the fucking kitchen and oh god- he must’ve seen my ass and all the marks you left on my neck!” You quickly say.

“Woah woah slow down I just woke up.” Hyunjae rubs his eyes. “Say that again?”

It takes a while for Hyunjae to process everything you’ve just said, but he grins as an idea suddenly pops into his head. Before you know it, Hyunjae quickly pulls you towards him and immediately has you under him, making you squeal from the sudden action.

“Hyunjae what are you doing?!” You loudly whisper.

“Breakfast! I’m starving…”

Before you could even ask what he meant Hyunjae’s lips are on your neck as he litters your skin with kisses. His hands sneak their way beneath your shirt and immediately grab your breasts in his hands, his thumbs flicking at your sensitive buds as you impulsively let out a moan.

“Oh fuck…” You groan as your fingers thread through his hair. It was like a switch suddenly turned off inside your head because now you can only think about Hyunjae.

“God can’t wait to taste you.” Hyunjae whispers against your ear as his fingers start pulling down your underwear. “Relax baby, let me do all the work.” Hyunjae grips the hem of your shirt and pulls it up enough to expose your breasts, the sound of his groan seeing your bare chest making your core pulse in excitement.

He wastes no time and immediately latches his lips onto your nipple, sucking it slowly as one hand rolls your other nipple between his fingers while the other cups your mound before running his fingers between your slick folds.

“You’re so fucking wet, is this all for me?” He whispers against your mouth. You nod your instead and let out a small whimper.

“C’mon now, need to hear you say it baby.”

“Y-yes… All for you.” You mumble.

He slowly runs his fingers in-between your folds, teasingly letting them get caught in your entrance before running them up to circle your clit. Every touch he leaves always has you brain dead in seconds. It was amazing how quick he remembered what you liked, and how well he observed the way you responded to his touch.

Now you finally understood why all his past conquests would never shut up about him.

“That’s a good girl.” He coos. Your back arches at how he expertly rubs the tips of fingers against your bud, your core throbbing when he stares right into your soul as he licks your essence on his fingers.

“Let me make you feel really good okay?” Hyunjae kisses your lips before slowly kissing his way from your neck all the way to your inner thighs. He playfully nips at your soft skin, making you yelp before he licks the spot to sooth any pain.

“So beautiful…” Hyunjae brings two fingers to spread your folds apart, admiring the way your slick glistens in the light. He’s not even that close and he can already taste your sweet sweet essence in his mouth from the smell alone.

“Hyunjae… please…” You beg, feeling his hot breath so close to your core. And without hesitation, he licks a fat stripe between your folds. The way he darts the tip of his tongue and traces it along your pussy as you spiraling.

Hyunjae latches his lips onto you, licking and sucking your sensitive bud as his hands grab the back of your thighs and pulls them over to his shoulder, further burying his face against your cunt. He subconsciously inserts two fingers in your entrance, making you arch your back further. Nothing but the sound of slurping, groaning, and endless moaning fills the room as you pull onto his hair. Hyunjae grips onto your thighs further, locking you in as he subconsciously grinds his hips onto the mattress seeking that needed friction on his member.

Your moans and the way you chant his name like a prayer are heard through the door. Though muffled, it was nearly echoing through the whole apartment. And it was especially ringing through Sangyeon’s ears as if he was inside in that room with you.

Sangyeon taps his foot anxiously as he tries to unclench his tightened jaw. If you could see him right now, there would be steam coming out from his nostrils like a raging bull from how pissed off he is at the moment.

The entire scenario confuses him deeply. While he should be mad at the fact he can hear what you’re up to, he is just a man after all. His crotch area starts to tighten beneath his jeans, making it uncomfortable for him to sit properly.

He really wishes it was his name that you were moaning to instead of Hyunjae’s. Wishing he was the reason for those angelic sounds, wishing he was loving you the way he should’ve. Regret starting to invade his mind as he continues to hear your voice behind the door. All of this wouldn’t have happened if he had just told you the truth about that night instead of running away like a coward.

“I-I’m cumming!”

“That’s it, that’s my good girl.” Hyunjae emphasizes.

As soon as Sangyeon heard both of your muffled voices, he snapped. He immediately got up from the chair, hastily gathered his things from the table, and rushed out of the apartment slamming the front door in the process. He couldn’t stand staying for another second and the high chance of seeing the both of you come out of that room at the same time.

‘Left, can’t focus at your place. Let’s meet by the cafe near school instead.’

Sangyeon hits send to Juyeon before throwing his phone to the side in his car. His fingers rushing to unbuckle his belt and free his aching member from his jeans and take care of his “problem” right then and there before heading to the cafe.

While you came down from your high, you both hear the front door of the apartment slam. The loud sound suddenly bringing you back to reality that Sangyeon was outside the whole time Hyunjae was eating you out and probably heard you both loud and clear.

“Oh shit Hyunjae I think he’s still-”

“Don’t worry, he’s gone.” Hyunjae lifts his head and looks at your with a mischievous grin on his face, a sheen of your essence coating his lips.

“How did you know?” you look back at him confused.

“Again, Juyeon does not give a fuck. Who else would be slamming doors while you scream my name?” You slap Hyunjae’s arm while a loud laugh erupts from his throat.

“You ass, you did that on purpose!” Your eyes widen, suddenly feeling embarrassed to look at Hyunjae.

“But you loved it anyway.” Hyunjae kisses your inner thigh before getting up and hovering above you, his incredibly hard bulge slightly nudging your core.

He leans down to kiss you and gives the back of your thigh a good slap, making you gasp at the sudden sting on your skin.

“Now c’mon, on your knees sweetheart. Wanna see you come on my cock this time.”

(Part 3)

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mmmichyyy · 1 year ago

Note

40? for the prompt

#40. "am i your husband or your taxi service?"

the first time it happens, mickey doesn't think much of it.

can you pick me up after my shift? too tired to take the L

when mickey is near the station, he parks the van a block away. force of habit from when he and his brothers used to sneak up and collect from people who owed terry money. plus, he doesn't particularly want ian's coworkers to see their stolen ambulance, even though it's completely unrecognizable after debbie helped them revamp the entire thing and paint over it with the logo sandy designed.

here

i don't see you

i'm parked a block away

pick me up at the station

your legs don't work?

i'm tired :(

i drove the van

it's fine no one will be able to tell lol

mickey rolls his eyes and drops his phone in the cupholder. as he pulls up across the street from the station, he sees ian standing on the curb, chatting with someone wearing a matching EMT uniform, a shorter man with tan skin and curly hair.

mickey honks once, a bit impatient since he's hungry as fuck and there's a large pizza he ordered earlier waiting for them at their apartment. ian lifts his head and smiles. as he waves goodbye to his coworker and jogs over to the van, mickey doesn't miss the way the dude is gaping at mickey with wide eyes and a dropped jaw.

the hell is this guy's problem?

"everything okay?" mickey asks, once ian buckles his seatbelt and reclines his seat.

"just tired." ian yawns. "had a long shift today."

"well," mickey puts the van in drive, reaching over the center console to ruffle ian's hair, promptly forgetting ian's weird coworker, "i already ordered a pizza so we can eat then turn in early."

ian smiles sleepily and interlaces his fingers with mickey's. "you're the best husband ever."

mickey shakes his head, biting back a smile. "sappy fucker."

after almost two weeks of ian asking to be picked up, mickey suspects something is up. not that he minds or anything, since he makes his own schedule nowadays. after the security business started turning a profit and ian went back to being an emt, he hired a couple of guys to drive the routes so he could work from home and catch up on admin work, freeing up a lot of time in his day to day.

but ian never used to mind the commute. he's the kind of long-legged freak who liked to take the scenic route and go on long runs in the morning, just for fun. absolutely deranged behaviour, in mickey's opinion. but lately, ian has been flashing his kicked-puppy eyes and asking to be chauffeured like a pampered prince and, well. mickey could never resist spending more time with his husband, so he hasn't said anything. not yet, anyway. god he's so whipped.

the excuses ian came up with, however, were more unbelievable as it went on, ranging from the train broke down (mickey knew for a fact it didn't), to spraining his elbow (though he had no problem throwing mickey on the bed later that night with his supposedly injured arm), to how it was going to rain later (it was sunny all day without a cloud in sight).

when mickey tried to call him out on his bullshit, ian either got down on his knees or flipped mickey over and fucked him senseless into the bed, promptly making mickey forget what the hell he was trying to say.

it's gotten to the point where ian stopped making excuses and simply asked mickey to come get him. which truthfully, mickey doesn't mind at all. but he just finds it odd how his beefy athletic husband had gotten so lazy.

"what's with you?" mickey finally asks one day, as ian climbs into the passenger seat.

ian blinks innocently. "what do you mean, dear husband of mine?"

mickey rolls his eyes. "am i your husband or your fuckin' taxi driver? 'cause i've been picking your ass up every day for the past two weeks when you have two perfectly functioning legs."

ian huffs, crossing his arms. "maybe i just want to spend more time with you."

"we live together," mickey points out flatly, "how much more time do you need?"

"i–"

a tap on the glass interrupts them, and mickey turns to see a woman with brown hair tied back in a ponytail, enthusiastically gesturing at him to roll down the window.

"the fuck?" mickey turns to ian, whose face has turned slightly pink. "did you forget something at the station?"

"ah, no." ian scratches his head sheepishly. "sue is just being... sue."

sue waves her hand again and mickey reluctantly lowers the window.

"mickey, this is sue, my supervisor, and sue, this is–"

"the elusive husband." sue grins. "i've heard a lot about you, mickey."

mickey raises his brow. "have you now."

"oh sure," she says, ignoring ian's frantic head shaking, "ian won't shut up about you, yapping on and on about mickey this and mickey that. we're all jealous at the station actually, everyone just complains about their partners while ian keeps gushing about how perfect and amazing his husband is. his words."

"huh." that explains a lot, actually, why there was always someone different waiting with ian every time he came to pick him up, and why they all stared at him like a circus freak. "well, i bet ian didn't tell you the time we stole an ambu–"

"okay," ian cuts in loudly, reaching over to turn the key in the ignition, "we're leaving. i'll see you tomorrow, sue."

"come to the company picnic next month," sue calls out. "it's a potluck and everyone is bringing their family. it'll be fun!"

"uh sure," mickey says, even though a social gathering with ian's nosy coworkers sounds like the least fun thing he's ever heard of. he looks over at ian, slumped in his seat, avoiding mickey's eyes. "I'll check my schedule."

once mickey drives around the corner, he playfully flicks his finger at ian's temple and ian rolls his eyes, shaking his head.

"you yap about me to your coworkers," mickey teases. "you're so fuckin' whipped."

"whatever," ian grumbles. "stupid sue calling me out."

"is that why you keep asking me to pick you up?" mickey asks, amused. "to parade me around like a little show dog?"

"well, eduardo blabbed to everyone he saw you, then everyone kept asking about you and wanted to see you in person, so..."

"hm." mickey reaches over and brushes his thumb over ian's palm. "what do you say about me?"

ian links their fingers together and sighs. "that you're attentive. funny. caring. protective. loyal. the ideal man."

mickey laughs. "you're really overselling me here, gallagher. did you forget i'm an ex-convict, pimp and drug dealer?"

ian waves him off and continues. "kind. loving. perfect in every single way, except when you leave your socks on the floor. oh and that you're hot as hell with an ass that won't quit."

"you talked about my ass?"

"okay, i didn't say the last part," ian amends, "your ass belongs to just me. but i meant everything else i said."

"you really are a sappy fucker."

"you love it."

"i'd love it even more if i didn't have to be your chauffeur every day, at least they get paid to drive back and forth."

"you come with me to the picnic, i'll pay you with favours in bed. i'll even throw in a big tip."

"a big tip, huh..."

#here's a fluffy fic for you anon 😌✨#gallavich ficlet #ian x mickey #michy ficlet #gallavich fic #my words #gallavich

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elainak03 · 4 months ago

Text

Broken (pt. 3)

TW: assault, trauma

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“hey there, pretty girl”, joe said to you as soon as you answered the skype. he’s been gone 5 weeks at this point. it’s honestly sucked being away from him this long. y’all’s friendship was really solid. he was opening up more about what’s been haunting him. he was only able to skype once a week, but hey, you’ll take that over nothing. you blushed hearing him call you that name. it’s something you noticed he started calling you a couple weeks ago, you didn’t put much thought into it.

“hey, how are you today”, you said back, smiling warmly. “i’m good, you know, could be better if i was home but hey, what can you do” he said jokingly. you giggled, “i know, im sorry. i miss you, i have a lot of paintings to show you when you get home”, you said, with a warm smile. he grinned from ear to ear, “i can’t wait to see them. i miss you too. i got some news though” he said. “oh? and what’s that”, you said, curiosity surging through you. “i’m coming home tomorrow” he said, with such a sweet expression. you tried to hide the excitement, even though you knew your cheeks flushing gave you away. “oh my goodness!! yay! i’m so excited to see you.” you said to him, eyes crinkling with excitement. he laughed subtly, “hey i gotta go cause we’re packing up, but i will see you tomorrow, pretty girl”, he said to you before ending the call.

~~~~~time jump to the next day~~~~~

it was about 12pm in the afternoon, when you heard your phone ding. you were chilling around your house waiting to hear from joe, and what do you know, it was him that texted you.

joe: hey i’m back, wanna catch a dinner and a movie later? that new bar & grill downtown. i’ll pick you up.

(y/n): hey! i’m so happy you’re back. of course, 5pm sound good?

joe: 5 sounds good to me, see you later, pretty girl

you say your phone down, cheeks flushing. you would be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t have feelings for joe. even though he was gone for 5 weeks, y’all grew closer. having personal conversations that make a bond grow stronger. he became your rock, when you would have your nightmares, you would wake up and immediately think about him. when you did, it instantly calms you down. joe opened up more to you. told you everything that has been bothering him all these years. he told you he was so happy to have you in his life, he finally felt safe with someone to talk to about his demons. after a brief nap, you went and got ready. you decided on an oversized sweater, leggings, and some chucks. you wanted to be comfy for the movies. it was 4:30pm, when you heard a knock on the door. you quickly grabbed your keys, phone, and wallet and headed for the door. “coming!”, you shouted, tripping slightly trying to hurry. you took one last deep breath before opening the door. you opened it to seeing joe smiling at you. you both stood there for a moment, before he engulfed you in a hug. “i missed you”, he said, hugging you tightly. you squeezed him back, “i missed you too, bear” you said, letting each other go. “you ready? i’m starving”, he said to you, motioning to his truck. “yes, i am starving”, you said back, following him to his truck. he opened the passenger door for you, and you hopped in, buckled up, excited for tonight.

you and joe finally made it to the restaurant after a few minutes. got seated and eventually ordered y’all’s food. “what movie were you thinking about watching?” he asked you, curiously. “hmm let me look on my phone and see what they’re showing….omg i found the perfect one”, you said giggling, a bit of mischievousness in your tone. “but you have to wait till we get there”, you said to him, a smirk wide on your face. he gave you a curious smirk, “alrighty, we’ll see” he said. y’all’s food finally arrived, after enjoying that and laughter consuming the conversations, joe paid for y’all’s food. he helped you out of the booth, y’all’s hands touching for a moment, electricity buzzing through your body. you blushed hoping he didn’t notice. y’all headed for his truck, and then onto the movie theater.

after arriving, you both hurried inside to get out of the cold air. “you pick whatever candy or popcorn you want”, joe said to you, with a wink and a smirk. “i just want some skittles”, you said looking at him sweetly. he told the worker a pack of skittles, and a drink. joe looked at you, “and what movie did you pick?”, he said, questioning. “two tickets to ‘anyone but you’, please”, you said with a big grin to the worker. you could just hear joes groan. “what’s wrong bear? not a big fan of rom-coms?”, you said, laughing. he just laughed and said, “come on, let’s go watch your silly movie”. yall eventually found your seats and the movie began. you’ve been wanting to watch this movie for weeks and were so happy to drag joe to it. you were so deeply entranced with the movie, you didn’t realize joe was looking at you, smiling. you didn’t know it yet, but he was getting feelings for you too. bad. you could ask him to do anything, and he would do it. eventually the movie was over, and you both got into the truck. it was about a 15 minute drive to your house. after some quite chit chat, you both were listening to music, and you fell asleep. car rides always put you to sleep, it never failed. joe noticed you balled up, cold. he reached into his back seat and grabbed one of his hoodies. draping it over you. he was just about to your house when he noticed your breath quickening. getting louder. he looked over to you, worried. he saw your brow scrunching, you started panicking in your sleep. he finally pulled up to your house, when you started crying, begging for someone to stop. he put the truck in park, “ (y/n)?? (y/n) wake up please, you’re safe. pretty girl, you’re safe, you’re with me.” he said, shaking you, panic setting in. you woke up, your breath spiking up, grasping for another. you grabbed the hoodie you didn’t realize was on you, for dear life. you looked around and saw joe, your heartbeat started slowing down, but then it hit you. you just had a nightmare right in front of joe. something you hadn’t told him about. he grabbed your face with both of his hands, “hey, shh, it’s okay. i got you”, his blue eyes connecting with your (e/c) one’s. after a moment you were finally calm, but you were choking on your words. “what was that? i mean if you don’t have me asking. you were asking someone to stop” he said, worry evident in his voice. you were stuttering, trying to find the right words. after taking a deep breath you looked at him, “do you wanna come inside? we can sit down and i can explain”, you said, worried. joe would be the first person you ever told. after a moment you both headed inside.

you showed joe the couch, and then you headed to the kitchen to brew some tea. after awhile, you headed back into the living room and handed him a cup. you held yours, staring at it for a moment. when you looked up at joe, he was looking at you worried, but there was also a caring look. you took a deep breath for a moment, “two years ago i was attacked. i was leaving an art function, when someone grabbed me and shoved me into an alley. he had touched me so disgustingly all over my body. hitting me, kicking me, if it wasn’t for the little strength i had left, yelling for help, i don’t think he would’ve stopped. someone heard me, thank god, and the guy ran off.” you said, not realizing you said it without skipping a beat. you looked at joe, he was looking at the ground, so many emotions were on his face. anger, worry, sadness, rage. “did the cops ever catch him?” he said, looking at you with a completely different look. “no they didn’t…and i’m sorry i didn’t tell you about this. i haven’t talked to anyone about this..”, you said, shame almost in your tone. joe grabbed you, engulfing you in his big arms, “you don’t have a thing to be sorry for, and don’t ever think you do. i am so sorry some low-life filth hurt you”, he said, laying his head on top of yours, and then proceeding to kiss the side of your head. that’s when you came crashing down. you held onto joe tighter, tears soaking your face, and his shirt. joe rubbed your back lovingly, letting you let all of this out, he knew you needed this.

after awhile, joe noticed you calmed down. your breathing slowed. he looked down at you, asleep, and at peace. he didn’t have it in his heart to wake you up. he quietly kicked off his shoes. grabbing a blanket off the back of your couch, while still holding onto you. he carefully laid back, putting his feet on the footstool in-front of him. you laid on his chest, peacefully. he put the blanket on you both, after watching you for 30 minutes to make sure you weren’t having another nightmare, he put his hat over his face, arm wrapped protectively over you, and eventually fell asleep.

#joe graves #joe graves x reader #captain price x reader #captain price #barry sloane #fluff

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silverlining-ships · 3 months ago

Note

Have you ever thought/posted about the mortality of silver vs the (kind of) immortality of jasper?

So this has sat in my inbox for WAY too long. Sorry for that anon, but buckle in. Lets talk about their contrast in mortality. Obligatory read more, I like to talk too much :')

Before I start though I'd just like to say I LOVE LOVE LOVE asks like this! Make me pick them apart ty!!! It's so fun to analyze them 🧡🧡🧡

Also also tw for mentioning death

When it comes down to it, it actually really bugs both Jasper and Silver but in different ways. Jasper, of course, has FINALLY let go and started to accept... peace, you know? She's spent thousands of years fighting, being alone, being convinced she MUST be alone (that she deserves to? that her strength lies in being alone?), and it genuinely takes her SO long to .. relax once her and Silver get together. Like it isn't just a ~kiss kiss fall in love~ thing. Jasper is a very angry, prideful, and terrified character, and it takes much more time (and both being with Silver AND reintegrating back into "gem society" and finding people she can really TRUST and rely on) for her to relax.

So eventually, she has to face the fact that Silver isn't going to live forever with her, and that's TERRIFYING.

On the other hand, Silver's reasoning is actually a little bit more selfish than Jasper's. Silver has ALWAYS felt lesser than her. She's stronger, she doesn't need to sleep or eat, she's a whole ass alien and Silver's just... a human, you know? She grew up without friends really, just doing her homework and trying to be successful that way, and not only does she finally have someone (multiple people!) that care about her and want her in their community... it's a community of people who will last FAR longer than she ever will. And deep down she hates that. She's always felt that there's so much she wants to do, so many places she wants to go, and she just won't ever be able to. Jasper's immortality is just ANOTHER thing she has above Silver. Of course there is a small voice worried for how Jasper would react after she passes, but to me, Jasper is the STRONGEST person I know. So Silver has no doubts about whether she'll be okay or not because she knows she'll be okay. But that deep down gross part of her? She hates that Jasper has this additional strength on her.

True to both their characters... they shove it down and ignore it for awhile. But eventually, I'd imagine that Silver ends up getting seriously hurt--probably while fighting or sparring or something--and it kind of hits both of them just how much more FRAGILE she is. Silver's like... well hell, my stubbornness can't get me through everything. Jasper's like... this human is bound to do something that ends up getting her killed, and I have no true power to stop it.

I know at some point, Silver actually is going to die an early-ish death in Jasver canon (around 40 or so), and the first thing Jasper does is get Steven to resurrect her. And Jasper/Silver end up fighting over it after.

-> "You can't just--Jasper, you can't just decide that for me, whether I get to live."

-> "There is no living without you."

-> "There is going to be living without me whether either of us like it or not."

-> "Shouldn't you be happy!? You're always talking about your next big thing, for the Homeschool, or for the Gems--aren't you glad!?"

-> "I'm just... upset. Upset that I didn't get the choice, is all."

-> "You picked that choice when you decided to go into a fight unprepared AND outnumbered. You should be thankful. I... I know I am."

I actually have this OLD sketch for what an older Silver would look like after being resurrected that I've always wanted to share though 😭🧡

But after Silver eventually passes away for good, I've always imagined Jasper aligning more with the Crystal Gems in her memory as well as watching over the bloodline resulting from the kid they adopted, Kay.

It's definitely a tragic thing. And I am personally extremely terrified of death, like... it's something that's always paralyzed me. There's so much I want to do, so many places I want to go, so many things I want to be. Jasper honestly... has given me a bit of peace when it comes to that. Maybe there will always be a part of me that keeps living on, even if it's just in my music and my art.

Idk man. Immortal x mortal my beloved.

#i love talking about them #and this was a really nice break from my work today so thank u anon #sorry this was so late :')))))#jasver 🧡#jasp analysis 📙#analysis & lore 📒#silver talks #long post #death mention #tw death #thank you anyone who read the whole thing i write a lot :'')) sdlfkjsdlkfjsd #phone call ☎️

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and-claudia · 2 years ago

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Against All Odds pt. 7 (Joel Miller x fem! reader)

SHE LIVES!!!!!! Hey guys sorry it's been awhile!! This semester is crazy!! I got a little time off and was finally able to work on some writing!! I am still getting back into the swing of it so I am so sorry if this isn't my best quality!!

Warnings: more angst, allusions to SA

General Warnings for later on: The main story will have an age gap between Joel and the reader (Reader will be 25 once we get to the main storyline), this will also be your warning that it will eventually be an x pregnant reader (if that's not your jam, I'm sorry) there is also going to be more graphic/trigger parts later on so please always to be sure to read the warnings BEFORE reading. This story will also be 18+ and TO BE ON THE TAGLIST YOU CAN NOT BE AN AGELESS BLOG (i do actually check that) also there first hand full of parts are all prologue so Joel won't actually be in it for a bit

word count: 4000+ (shorter again, I know but I wanted to do the whole ambush part and the suburbs part together in one part, so the next one should be longer, but it may not be out until closer to Christmas once the semester is over)

Taglist Sign-Up (read my rules carefully before filling it out)

gif not mine

After we had all gotten a chance to clean up, Joel decided to go out and see if he could get the truck started. Meanwhile, I went around the kitchen seeing if there was anything salvageable to bring with us.

“Truck’s ready.” Joel said as he walked in.

“Good, I found a few cans of food in here. I figured I could check the garage too before we left.”

He nodded before turning around and walking back out. I turned to Ellie who was throwing her bag back on.

“You ready?” I asked.

“Yup. I’ll help you look in the garage when we get out there.” She said as we headed for the door.

“Thanks.”

We got to the truck and tossed our bags in before taking one last good look around. There wasn’t much out here in all honesty. I was ready to just get in the truck and leave when Ellie called me over.

“Hey, I found some more cans over here!” She hollered causing Joel and I to walk over.

“What‘cha got?” I asked.

“I found a few things, they were all under that crusty shirt.” She said pointing to it.

When I saw it, my eyes almost bulged out of my head. I knew where that shirt came from, and it belonged to the man standing beside me who had a similar expression on his face.

“Ellie, go wash your hands, we’ll get the cans.” I said and she gave me a weird look, “Just go do it.”

She shrugged and did as I said.

“Huh, never really expected to see that again.” Joel said tossing the shirt aside.

“Yeah, me neither… Do you think Bill or Frank ever found it?” I asked.

He only shrugged and started grabbing the cans to put in the truck. So much for a conversation.

When Ellie got back, we loaded up the truck with everything we were taking. Joel got into the driver's seat, and Ellie got in behind him. Out of instinct, I went to get in the backseat with Ellie. I had never actually ridden up front ever. I was still in a car seat when the outbreak happened and then anytime I rode in a vehicle after that, I was always in the back.

“What are you doing?” Joel asked.

“What?”

“Get up front.” He nodded to the vacant seat beside him.

I shut the door and went to get in the front seat, “This is weird.” I commented but to tell the truth, I was kinda excited to ride up front.

“Both of you buckle up.” Joel said, as he started the truck.

“What?” Ellie asked.

“This thing.” I showed her mine that I had pulled down.

She glanced around herself before Joel turned around in his seat and reached back to help her out. I couldn’t help but smile to myself, it was really such a dad thing to do, but I tried not to dwell on it too much knowing it would only make me sad. Subconsciously, my hand went to my stomach.

“Is it safe?” I asked as he pulled out of the garage.

“Hm?”

“Riding in the front when you’re pregnant, is it safe?” I clarified.

“You think I would tell you to if it wasn't?” He asked as we began to drive away from the house.

I shrugged and reached up to open the glove compartment. I found a cassette tape in it. It was too faded to read what was written on the side. I shrugged and opened it anyway.

“What are you doing?” Joel asked.

“Road tunes.” I said as I put it in.

An old song started playing that I vaguely recognized. I reached up to change it to see what else was on it, but Joel stopped me.

“No leave it, leave it. This is good. This is Linda Ronstadt. Do you know who that is?”

“I don’t.” Ellie said from the backseat.

“I’ve heard of her… I think my mom used to listen to her… This song sounds a little familiar.” I said.

We pulled up to the gate and Joel stopped. He took a deep breath before pressing the button to open it. The sun was low in the sky, casting a warm, golden glow across Joel’s face. I rested my head against the window as we drove. As the song got to the chorus I heard the familiar words “And I think I'm gonna love you, For a long long time” I couldn’t help but think of Joel… and as I sat there, eyes closed, I allowed myself to pretend, even for just a moment that everything was normal… that Joel and I were together, the outbreak never happened, maybe even we were the same age, going home to tell my parents about the baby, his daughter-no our daughters- sitting in the backseat. It felt so right. It felt like a dream… too good to be true.

Progress was slow. Once every hour or so, we were having to stop to siphon gas out of abandoned cars. During one of our stops, I was looking at the map trying to help refine our route. I traced my pinky over a route that would take us longer but would ultimately be safer.

“Why don’t we follow that one? 84?” Ellie asked pointing to a different interstate.

“Because 84 goes to Hartford, the QZ there is in shambles. We’re trying to avoid it, but not take forever… so I’m thinking… stay here on 90, avoid Connecticut all altogether… only issue is, it does take us further North… so it’s going to take us even longer…” I said, scanning the map for any alternatives.

“Well, we’re already taking forever, stopping every hour.” Ellie said with a sigh as she sat back in her seat.

“I know, but we have to.” I said with a similar sigh just as Joel opened the door.

“We have to what?” He asked, starting the truck again.

“Stop every hour for gas.” I said.

“But why? I thought cars were supposed to be useful. This just seems like a major inconvenience.”

“They were. 20 years ago. But gas breaks down over time… the stuff I’m siphoning out of these cars is practically just water now. So to keep the truck going, gotta make stops. But it beats walking there.”

“I think found us a route to take. It takes us North a bit, but it’ll avoid Conetticet completely. I think it’s worth it if it means we avoid Hartford.”

“Let me see.”

I showed him and to my surprise, he agreed it was the best option.

“We got maybe two hours left of daylight… I wanna get past Springfield at least.” He said.

I nodded and soon we were on the road again. We had already cycled through the tape and were now riding in an awkward silence. I glanced behind me at Ellie to see what she was doing and found her reading a book.

“Whatcha reading?”

She held it up to show me, “‘No Pun Intended: Volume Too’ by Will Livingston,” She said with a smile, “Get it? Volume Too.”

“Jesus.” I heard Joel sigh under his breath, hearing our conversation.

“Is there some good stuff in there?” I asked.

She nodded and then scanned the page she was on to find a worthy joke, “Oh here, it doesn’t matter how hard you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationary.”

I smiled, it was cheesy but good.

“What did the mermaid wear to her math class?... An Alge Bra!” She said, laughing a little at it.

I laughed some too and glanced over at Joel, he was shaking his head slightly, clearly not amused by the jokes.

“I stayed up all night wondering where the sun had gone-” Ellie began another joke.

I knew this one and decided to push Joel’s buttons, just a little.

“But then it dawned on me!” I said with Ellie.

“No way, you know that one?” Ellie said.

Joel looked over at me still not amused, “You can ride in the back.” He said.

“You’re such a stick in the mud, you know that?” I said to him.

Thankfully Ellie got the hint that that was enough jokes for now and closed her book in favor of looking at what we were driving past. Both sides of the roads were covered in cars that had been forced off the road.

“Must have been some truck.” Ellie said.

“Yeah, they used to stick big-ass plows on them, and clear the roads for their tanks and such.” Joel said, not even glancing away from the road in font of him.

“I wanna see a tank!” Ellie said.

“I don’t.” I commented, talks usually didn’t mean good news.

“You will. Tanks, choppers, all that stuff. But they’ll fight the wrong enemies. Just scattered around now.” He said, clearly bringing a heavier tone to our conversation than Ellie was wanting because she quickly changed the topic.

“Oh yeah, I found this…” She said leaning forward and holding a new cassette tape in her hand, “This make you feel all nostalgic?”

Joel glanced at it, “This is actually before my time.”

“Great, even older, old music.” She said, sitting back.

“It’s a winner though.” Joel said, putting it in.

“Found something else too.” Ellie said, pulling out a magazine from under the seat.

She opened it and scanned the pages, “It’s light on the reading but it has some interesting pictures.”

At that Joel and I both looked back to see what she had found.

“No, no, no. Put that back.” Joel said immediately, meanwhile, I was just trying not to laugh.

During the whole exchange, I was just trying not to laugh, but then I was sent over the edge when I heard Ellie say, “Why are all these pages stuck together?”

I couldn’t hold it in anymore, I started laughing so hard it was difficult to breathe. What made it even better was Joel trying to come up with a response. He stumbled over his words and couldn’t get an answer to form.

“I’m just fuckin’ with ya.” Ellie said, before scooting over to the window and tossing it out.

I was in tears by this point.

“Dude, chill, you’re gonna piss yourself.” Ellie said.

“I’m trying not to.” I said, whipping the tears from my eyes.

After that, the drive died down. Every so often we would comment on what we saw. We passed some wild buffalo that had roamed more and more since the outbreak. We passed an old amusement park. You could see the old rollercoasters still standing tall. I had always wanted to ride one, but never got to. Joel told us about a few that he had been on when he and his brother went to Six Flags Fiesta Texas, a couple of my brothers had been there before too, I was just too little to go with them. Later on we saw the tanks that Joel promised. And just like the hundreds of cars we had passed, they were left abandoned on the side of the road.

I was grateful when Joel announced that we had done enough driving for the day and pulled the truck off the main road, across a field, and into the tree line to keep us hidden. I got out and stretched. Sitting all day had made my knees stiff.

“I’m gonna make us some food.” Joel said and I nodded.

“I’m going to go find a place to pee.” I said, walking the other way.

When I got back I could smell the food and it made my stomach rumble.

“What is that?” I asked, walking over to stand by Joel.

“20-year-old Chef Boyardee ravioli.” He said.

“Could’ve left out the ‘20-year-old’ part.” I said, taking a seat.

“You can raid what we have, it’s slim pickings though, but I guess if the smell or something is already making you feel sick.” He said.

“Oh, no, I feel fine. It smells really good actually.” I said, happy that I didn’t feel like I was going to puke anytime soon.

“Good. Here.” He said scooping some out and handing it to me, “Ellie, come eat.” He called the young girl over.

Ellie took her portion and sat down with it then immediately dug in.

“Slow down some.” Joel said.

“This is good stuff, what is it?” She asked between bites.

“Chef Boyardee.”

“That guy was good.” She said, shoving another bite into her mouth.

“I actually agree.”

“Me too.” I nodded, taking a bite of my own.

“So… how long we staying out here?” Ellie asked.

“I figured I sleep tonight and drive tomorrow, all day, all night, get us to Wyoming by next mornin’.” Joel said.

It wasn’t a bad plan, I just didn’t know if he’d be able to stay up that long without dosing off. Ellie must have thought the same thing.

“Why doesn’t Yn take a shift driving? I feel like that’s a lot of driving for just one person.” She said.

“I don’t know how to… well, I know the logistics of it, but I’ve never actually done it before. And don’t think right now is the time for driving lessons.” I said.

She nodded before firing off another question, “Can we start a fire? I’m freezing.”

I already knew the answer but Joel beat me to it, “Now why am I going to tell you no?”

“Because infected will see the smoke.” She said with a sigh.

“Fungus ain’t that smart.” He shot back.

“We’re too remote now for infected.” I chimed in.

“Okay, so people?” She asked and we nodded, “So what are they gonna do? Rob us?”

“Oh, they’ll have way more in mind than that.” Joel said.

Ellie nodded, understanding what he meant. A young girl, a woman in her 20s, and an older man wouldn’t be much of a fight against raiders, and if a big enough group got to us and overwhelmed us, they could easily have their way with any of us. It was a scary thought, but it was just the reality of what could happen.

Conversation died off after that and we finished our meal in quietness. Then after that, we got ready to settle down for the night. We each grabbed a sleeping bag and brought them over to the lantern to set up.

“Actually smells pretty good.” Ellie commented as she laid her’s out.

“That would be Frank’s then.” Joel said.

“That would mean you have Bill’s.” I said, popping the tag off of mine. I had found an unused one in one of Bill’s supply stashes.

I hesitated as I thought about where to lay mine out. Yes Joel and I had a few moments today where we seemed like our old selves before we knew about the baby, but I wasn’t 100% sure where we were overall and I didn’t want to test my luck. So, I opted not to lay mine right next to his. We all got settled in and Ellie turned off the light.

I was just about asleep when I heard Ellie call out for Joel.

“Joel? Can I ask you a serious question?” She said.

I was worried that something was wrong.

“Yeah.”

She took a deep breath and sighed, “Why did the scarecrow get an award?” She asked.

There was a few beats of silence before Joel spoke up, “Because he was outstanding in his field.”

I could see him fighting a smile.

“You dick!” Ellie said with a laugh, “Did you read this?”

“No.” Joel said, suppressing a laugh as he rolled over to but his back to us, “Now go to sleep. Both of you.”

It was quiet for a few moments before Ellie spoke once again, “Those people you said… there’s no way anyone knows we’re here, right? No one’s going to find us.”

“No one’s gonna find us.” Joel confirmed.

“Okay.” Ellie said quietly.

I fell sleep soon after that but was woken up only a few hours later. It was still dark out. I rolled over and saw Joel’s sleeping bag was empty. I glanced around and found him standing watch. I quietly got up and walked over to him, making sure not to startle him.

“You should be asleep.” He said.

“So should you.” I commented.

He was silent for a moment, “I couldn’t… just paranoid, I guess.”

I nodded. In the short time she’s been with us, I could tell the effect it had on Joel. I knew about Sarah. And I could tell that having Ellie around was bringing that all back to him.

“Hey, we’ll be okay. Alright?” I said gently as I hugged onto his arm and laid my head on his shoulder.

I could feel the way he relaxed some and let a sigh. After a few minutes of standing there with him a yawn escaped my lips.

“You should go back to bed. I’m gonna stay up. Just in case. We’ll stop again tomorrow night and just get to Wyoming the next day.” He said.

“Okay.” I let go of his arm only for him to catch me by the wrist gently.

“I love you, you know that right?” He asked.

I nodded, “I love you too, Joel.” I said quietly.

And I meant it. Despite the shit show we’ve been through the past few days, I did still love him. I knew we would figure this all out eventually. It would take time, but we’d get there, together. I went back to my sleeping bag and slid back into it. When I woke back up the next morning, Joel was already heating up coffee on the camping stove. Ellie was just waking up as well. About 30 minutes later, we were loaded back up and on the road again.

Joel had poured the coffee into thermos to drink on the road. In the past, I would’ve happily shared it with him. But now the smell was revolting almost. Ellie seemed to agree.

“Is that seriously what the Starbucks in the QZ used to sell?” She asked, clearly disgusted.

“Well, theirs was a lot fresher than what Bill saved up, but yeah, this what they sold.” Joel said.

“Smells like burnt shit.” Ellie said.

“Yeah, it’s gross.”

“You love coffee.” Joel said.

I shook my head, “Not anymore.”

“Alright, eyes on the map, where am I heading?”

“Keep headin' south until we hit 78, that will get us to 76, then from there we’ll get to 70 west which we will stay on for pretty much ever.” I said.

Joel nodded.

“Where in Wyoming did you say your brother was?” Ellie asked.

“Last contact came through a radio tower close to Cody.” Joel said.

I scanned the map to find it and once I did I held it up to show her.

“Wow that is deep in there… And what if he’s not there?” She asked.

“Then odds are he’ll be near a settlement, probably close to another city out there. Ain’t too many of ‘em in Wyoming.”

She nodded and I thought, more so hoped, that would be the end of her questions. I knew this was a touchy subject for Joel and I really didn’t want to upset him.

“What’s his name?” She asked.

“Who’s name?”

“Your brother.”

“Tommy.” He said.

“Younger or older?” She fired off another question at him.

“Younger.” “Why isn’t he with you?”

I watched Joel for his reaction to this question.

“Long story.”

“Is it longer than 25 hours? ‘Cause I think that’s what we got.” She asked.

I could tell Joel was considering his options of telling her or not. To my surprise, he began telling her about how he was a “joiner.” He told her that he enlisted in the Army right out of high school. Then after the outbreak, Tommy was the one who convinced Joel to join a group that was heading to Boston. He told her how Tommy met Marleen and how she convinced him to join the Fireflies. But last he heard he had quit that too and he was alone and that is why Joel was heading out there, to go get him.

“If you don’t think there’s hope in the world, why bother going on?” Ellie asked.

Joel glanced over at me for the briefest second before answering, “You haven’t seen the world, so you don’t know.”

“You keep going for family. That’s about it.” He added.

“I’m not family.” Ellie pointed out.

“No, you’re cargo. And I made a promise to Tess. And she was like family.”

I could tell the conversion was making him shut down.

“What if you don’t find him?” Ellie asked.

It was a legitimate question. One that I was too scared to ever dare ask.

“I will.” Joel said firmly.

“How do you know?”

“I’m persistent.”

That shut the conversation right down.

“Hey Ellie, we got up pretty early. You can take a nap back there if you want.” I said.

“I’m not even tired.” She said.

But sure enough after about 30 min of silence, she was out.

“Are you okay?” I asked Joel.

He sighed, “Yeah.”

“You sure?”

He only nodded.

I decided to drop it, he had already shut down, and there was no point in making it worse. Instead, I opted to also get some rest. Later that day, Joel had changed his mind and continued driving through the night.

I could never fall asleep very long. I ended up dosing off and on throughout the night. When I woke up again, the sun had risen and we were approaching a city. Ahead of us was an overpass tunnel and from the looks of it, it was blocked.

“Where are we?” I asked, rubbing my eyes.

“Kansas City. Wait here.” Joel said, turning off the truck and going to get out but I stopped him.

“Joel, we are way too close to the city for you to go out there alone.” I said, worried about Infected or even other people attacking him.

“I’ll be fine.” He said and got out, then he grabbed the rifle from the back seat.

I watched anxiously as he got closer to the tunnel. There could be anything in there. After a couple minutes of looking, he began making his way back. I didn’t take my eyes off him until he was back in the car.

“Now what?” I asked.

He grabbed the map to look for an alternate route.

“Screw it.” He said tossing me the map.

“What’s the plan?” I asked.

“We go back a ways, get off the highway, come back down, take the next ramp. Puts us back on the road, 5 minutes tops.” He said.

I sat quietly as he drove but I began to grow wary as we got deeper and deeper into the city.

“Where the fuck is the highway?” He asked.

“I’m trying Joel!” I said looking between the map and the signs we were passing. They were all so faded it was nearly impossible to figure out where we were and him yelling at me wasn’t helping.

“Quit looking at the state map!”

“Joel, I am trying my fucking best! Quit yelling at me, I’m already freaked out as it is being this far into the goddamn city!” I shot back.

“Well we wouldn’t be if you could just give me directions!”

“I thought you had a fucking plan? 5 minutes tops, remember?!” I shot back.

Suddenly Ellie yelled from the back seat, “Stop!”

We did and turned to see what was wrong.

“Is that the QZ? Where the fuck is FEDRA?” She asked.

Sure enough to our left was the entrance to the QZ with its gates wide open.

“We need to get the fuck out of here.” I said.

“Hey! Please help!” We all turned to the front to see an injured man stumbling towards us.

“Both of you seatbelts, now.” Joel said, putting his own on too.

“Aren’t we gonna help him?” Ellie asked, clearly confused.

“No.” Joel and I both said.

Joel turned the car to try and get away from him. I was scanning the area for anyone else, knowing it was a trap.

“Joel!” Was all I was able to yell as I saw a guy throw a cinder block from a fire escape.

It hit our windshield and shattered it. Joel kept driving. We ran over something and I could feel the car drop as it popped the tires. Then another man stepped out in front of us and began shooting. Joel swerved the truck to the left. I only caught a glimpse of the glass window before we went straight through it. I closed my eyes and braced myself for the impact I knew was coming.

taglist: (if you filled out a form and aren't on this list that means either a) your blog is not coming up in the searches so I am unable to confirm that you are 18+, or b) you did not follow my rules for being tagged in this fic)

@sexyvixen7

@joelmillerslays

@elliaze

@little-lovely-darling

@swimmjacket

@watercolorskyy

@mserynlarsen

@sebby-staan

@beelanie

@fan-g0rl

@paige96

@pedropascalfanclub

@ameliadraws

@mavs101

@azerty29

@rileyferg

@belliedellie

@rhaenyrasgf

@imcreepininyourheartbabe

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@summerchicken

@kelh27

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@letmehavemyfictionalmen

@everything-isfucked

@emilyjustemily

@drewharrisonwriter

@littlwitchgoblin

@angel4astraea

@vodkawriter

@taz-97

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@kodzuvk

@kittenlittle24

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@keileighr

@shotgun-shelby

@joeldjarin

@catsareawesomek

#joel miller x reader fluff #joel x reader #joel the last of us #joel miller x pregnant reader #joel miller smut #joel miller tlou #joel miller #joel tlou #joel miller x reader #hbo the last of us #the last of us hbo #the last of us

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queen-tashie · 14 days ago

Text

Happy Storyteller Saturday!

It's Storyteller Saturday, and I am very inconsistent with it lol

So let's talk about some of the stories I've written, and more specifically, some queer ones for Pride month!! Feel free to ask questions about the stories below (or any other aspect of writing, too)!

Stories with info below the cut because this could get long.

Fanfics

Stardew Valley - Left Behind (~11k words)

What happens when the farmer divorces and wipes the memory of their ex? Elliot wakes up from a nightmare he can't remember. As he goes about his day trying to introduce normalcy, he learns it's six years later than he thinks it is. Some people know what happened, but only one is willing to tell him.

Currently my most popular fic on AO3, even despite the fact that it's a rarepair. The story follows Elliot's POV the whole way through as he copes with the above problem. Early on, Willy takes notice of Elliot's struggles and gives him stability as he makes sense of the six years he's missing. It's not the first mlm fic I've written, but it is the first one with smut!

Legend of Dragoon - Two Rocs Don't Make a Right (~8k words)

The night before the party enters the Valley of Corrupted Gravity, they confront their feelings in their own ways. It's difficult dealing with romance on the road, and even more so, dealing with grief. After a night in Twin Castle, the party fights for their lives in the Valley.

Speaking of the first mlm fic, I wrote this fic last year and posted it on Valentine's Day to celebrate 25 years (plus a few months) of platonic love with my bff, who I had been replaying LoD with at the time. There's almost a half-dozen POVs throughout the fic which I'm quite proud of, as I think each one really adds to the story in a way that one or two wouldn't be able to achieve. I also rarely write stories with more than one POV, so this is an accomplishment there too.

Originals

The Diver (~5k words so far, should be almost 7k after chapter 2 is added)

Andi and her wife, Emily, have been struggling to keep up with unfair taxes on their rented farmland, when an opportunity to own it, and the surrounding farmland, presents itself. The lord who owns it is devious however, and has deceived countless others before. With little other choice, Andi joins the competition, only to discover there are worse risks ahead than losing her farm.

Not only was this my first wlw story, it was also one of my first ever completed short stories. Originally a flash fiction, it may have also been written either just before or around the time I only just started to realize my own queer identity, though that has been an ongoing and multi-step process lol. It's intended to have a second chapter which was also written around the time I started doing these flash fictions, I just need to buckle down and edit it a bit (just for polish). Ask me questions about it and it might kick me in the ass enough to work on it haha

The Quiet Forest (~92k words once the entire story is posted)

A mysterious cult is destabilizing communities and gathering followers before it summons its violent goddess. But the rest of the world is fixated on the threat of another war, and it's up to one furious elf to stop it.

My very first completed novel-length manuscript! I started it over a decade ago when I believed myself to be both neurotypical and straight, and while some hints to queerness and ADHD were subtle in this story, others were not (even in early drafts). I like how the story and identities evolved over the time I wrote this story, and how I kept my promise to my younger self to finish this story no matter what. The queer characters have all been introduced at this point, and I've left evidence of them even in my earlier teaser posts for this story. Can you find them? ;) The final chapter will be posted in the nearish future, can you guess what's significant about the final chapter date?

#writing #writeblr #my writing #pride #feel free to either read the stories or ask questions based on these very short summaries!

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lostinlewis · 2 years ago

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can we do “I miss you sex” or “after fight sex”

Hehe It is hard to decide which one I want more...

Mature - After fight sex

Words: 1.2k

“I said I’m sorry, what more do you want from me?”

You answered his attitude with a slam of the kitchen cabinet, you were not about to give him the attention he so desperately sought from you, it was too late for that.

“Baby, please…”

It was only as you felt his hand slide around the small of your back that you snapped, shrugging him off of you, recoiling like his touch made you sick, you finally looked at him, although when he saw your expression you were sure he would wish you hadn’t.

“Do not baby me, Lewis. I told you to leave me alone.”

You looked at him as if he was anyone else in the world, you looked at him with disappointment in your eyes, with a sadness that only the strongest of loves could conjure, you looked at him with a gaze that attempted to penetrate his skin with a thousand words you tried hard to not say, knowing always that you had a way of saying the most vicious things when you were angry, whether you meant them or not.

“And I told you that I’m not going to, you can tell me to leave a hundred times but I’m not going to.”

“Whatever Lewis, I’m done here.”

You tried to walk past him, you tried to stay strong, but the very moment you almost passed him he grabbed your wrist, turning you back around to face him.

“We can’t keep doing this, YOU can’t keep doing this…I have told you I love you, I have told you that it will only ever be you, yet every time I am pictured next to a woman you doubt me.”

You tried to shake off his grip on your wrist yet it only made him hold on tighter.

“How would you like it if you opened up Instagram or Twitter and saw images of me with other men? What if the roles were reversed and you saw a video of me in a club with a man who stood a little too close to me whilst I had my top half off.”

Lewis smiled and you felt a rage burn so hot within you, you thought you might explode.

“You think this is funny? Fuck you Lewis, Fuck you.”

It was that rage that gave you the strength to wriggle loose from his grip, turning quickly on your heels you tried to leave once more.

“No baby, wait…wait…It’s not funny, I would hate it…”

This time he held you by your waist and you felt a familiar tingle, a tingle that was born from his touch, a tingle that made it impossible for you to do anything but listen to him.

“I would hate it if I saw a man next to you, I do hate it when I see man next to you, but I would also remember that you love me, that you would never betray me, that no matter what those men said to you, how those men looked, they would never…ever…”

Lewis moved closer to you as you anticipated his next words, a smile on his face as if he knew he was about to win this one, until he stood in silence in front of you for a second before dropping to his knees.

“...be able to make you moan like I can.”

As if you could do nothing but prove him right, the very second he pulled your shorts to the side and buried his tongue against your clit, you let out the loudest sweetest moan, your knees buckling in an instance, held up only by his hands on your ass.

Lewis licked at your clit with a point to prove, you tried your hardest to not give him the satisfaction of your pleasure filled sounds yet the more you held them in the harder he made it for you.

It was effortless how he carried you to the counter top, placing you so gently down on it, he never once stopped eating your pussy as you moved. Once he had you in place, once he had full access to every single part of the pussy he loved to devour, he really made the most of it.

The sounds of him lapping at your clit, sucking at the wetness of your folds, his soft humming moans from how much he loved eating your pussy, rang through the air. You struggled against your moans, knowing that every sound that left your lips would tell him of your forgiveness when you wasn’t quite ready for that yet, but Lewis made it so hard for you to keep quiet, he battled your stubbornness with his tongue, his powerful, magical tongue, and soon he had you teetering on the edge of the most earth shattering of all orgasms.

“Let go, baby…let me make you feel so good…”

Lewis hummed the words against your clit as he felt how tense you were as you tried so hard to hold back. You were winning and he hated it, he needed you to feel how sorry he was and the only way he knew how to do that was with an orgasm.

Standing back up to your level, he panted breathlessly just as hard as you did as both gazed unsatisfied.

“You’re such a stubborn girl, such a stubborn girl…”

You were so hypnotised by the glistening of juices in his beard, you hadn’t even noticed that he was carefully undoing his belt until the very moment you heard it drop to the floor.

He saw your eyes widen with anticipation, a knowing of what was to come next, an understanding that within a few minutes he would win this argument and you would be forced to forgive him.

“...you don’t wanna let me taste your orgasm tonight? Fine, but you will give it to me regardless.”

Before the last words left his lips he pushed inside of you, bottoming out within you with such force it was only the wall behind you that held you in place.

No longer could you hold in your moans, not now that he stretched you out with his thickness, you were powerless to him, awash with pleasure in an instant as he pounded you with every intent of making you crumble within minutes.

“I love you baby, I love you…only you…only ever you…”

His voice was gruff now, hoarse from the intensity of which he fucked you. This was for you, every single stroke was for your pleasure only and you knew it too.

“Please baby, let me have it…please…”

His pleas were for a mercy that meant so much more than the orgasm you permitted him, as you crumbled underneath his weight, screaming out pleasure filled moans into the air, you knew his pleas were weighted in a need for you to forgive him for a crime he was mostly innocent of.

Most other men would have carried on until they finished too, but not Lewis. That was for you, that was all for you, and the very moment he knew that you were satisfied entirely he pulled out of you and hugged you into his chest to soothe you.

“You’re my everything baby, don’t ever forget that.”

#LHex #my inability to keep it short and sweet is SO frustrating

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sleepingpopplio · 2 years ago

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Toga and her happy ending

I think after taking some time to process the latest chapter I can finally verbalize what feels wrong about it. First, I think it’s really good to be hopeful that Toga isnt dead, but I also feel like a lot of the fandom right now is trying to not think about Toga being dead because if she truly is then they might end up like how I’m feeling. So, let’s just say hypothetically she is like truly, really dead without a shadow of doubt.

Now, The first Issue I see with this writing is that it arguably goes against the themes of the story. In order to make a better society, our heroes need to be able to win AND save (hehe Bakugo and Deku at the core of the story once again). Otherwise, saving the league would feel hollow. So, Ochako DID win the fight between her and Toga by talking toga down from the edge and bringing out the goodness in her. But did she save her?

I would argue no.

Toga may be able to go out “her way”, but she still ends up dying before taking any further steps to heal and find her place as her authentic self within society. Ochako thinks she has a cute smile, but will everyone else? We are stripped of the negotiation process to get Toga the proper help she needs instead of throwing her in jail. We are deprived of Ochako standing up for her and helping her finally be the happy schoolgirl Toga always wanted to be, without the mask this time. We, the audience, are denied of seeing toga take accountability for her actions. Therefore, while Ochako may have saved Toga on a one-to-one level, and she still deserves credit for that btw, Toga ultimately died without witnessing society as a whole changing for the better. She was not saved— She was only helped… and is that a satisfying conclusion after years of buildup? After all the work to make Ochako come to value winning AND saving of everyone? Is that satisfying?

The fact that so many people refuse to believe Toga is dead points to this.

One more thing I would want to add here is a comparison to another member of the lead, someone that I have seen a lot of members of the fandom fight back against the notion that they should die. That character is Tomura Shigaraki. I’ve seen people say that Tomura should die in a sacrificial way in order to redeem himself, but then in response many fans push back and speak about how that wouldn’t solve any of Shigaraki’s problems and instead it would only leave shigaraki in a state of limbo in terms of reaching a satisfying and logical conclusion for him. Deku wouldn’t have achieved his goal to the fullest extent, society wouldn’t get to accept Tomura and show that even he is design of forgiveness after what he was put through, and we wouldn’t get to see how a reformed hero society would handle the league of villains moving forward. Sound familiar? My point in bringing this up is to show that it seemingly doesn’t make sense how you can argue how one villain should survive while the other should die because either way the death of one villain, even if it’s a heroic sacrifice, is still an incomplete rescue. It’s still an incomplete narrative, as it had framed itself to be a hopeful one, despite all the dark aspects. So, let’s just keep that in mind.

My next point is going to be a heavy one, so buckle up. Let’s keep going with the hypothetical of Toga being really, truly dead, ok? Toga being dead has so many implications and undertones. You can make an argument for, if she is the only league member that dies, how she is written in an upsetting way as both the only woman and canonically queer member of the league. Furthermore, the ‘Bury Your Gays’ trope is defined by killing off LGBTQ characters at an alarmingly higher rate than their heterosexual peers, and their death is usually because they entered some sort of queer relationship, or if someone has to die it might as well be the queer one. Am I saying that Horikoshi has malicious intent and hates queer people in stories? ABSOLUTELY NOT. DO NOT GO AND HARASS THE MAN BECAUSE IT ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING. But, there could be some internal bias because of Japanese society as a whole’s view of queer people. There also could be some push from editors to kill the queer character for this exact reason. Of course, this is all speculation and it’s not ok to jump to conclusions and assume the worst of writers. But Toga meant something to people. She meant something to queer people. If the reformed hero society could accept Toga for who she is, then wouldn’t that include her queerness? In a world where homophobia is increasing again at an alarming rate, kids need to see that being queer doesn’t mean that they have to be the “villain” in society’s eyes. Queer people deserve saving. But as my previous point discussed, Toga was not fully saved. Queer kids reading the manga will not get to see how Toga could find her sense of belonging in society while still living her truth. The queer subtext behind her relationship with Ochako will end in of of their deaths. Therefore, as someone with experience with living in a homophobic household and having to hide themselves, this does not feel like a happy ending.

Furthermore, I’m going to make another comparison just like I did in my previous point. But this time, I’m going to use a character from a different franchise that also involves superhero’s and is a heavy inspiration for Horikoshi’s writing. That character is Black Widow from the MCU. She was a beloved character, but often underutilized by the writers. The only female member of the avengers, Black Widow was often sexualized and used as the object of desire out of the bunch. She was badass, but always tied to her male counterparts. She was not allowed to exist without the other male avengers around. This was the pattern of her character writing for many years, up until Avengers: Endgame premiered. When that movie came out, Blackwidow played a key role… that role was to sacrifice herself. She did this so that her best friend, Hawkeye, wouldn’t have to sacrifice himself instead. He didn’t want her to sacrifice herself. He was fine with dying and tried to stop her. But despite his efforts, Blackwidow still sacrificed herself and died. This happened before she could get her own movie, and specifically before she could confront her past trauma and heal from it. She went out her way on her terms, but the audience still lost the vital piece of representation that she gave to the avengers and still suffered from never seeing Blackwidow’s character get to heal and overcome her pain. Does all of this once again sound familiar? Women often are the first to get hurt or die out of their hero or villain groups in the superhero genre. One good thing about Toga, however, is that she died alongside another female companion. A well written relationship between two women was front in center, instead of one between a man and woman. Despite that, however, Toga was often used as the sexualized member of the league and tended to revolve around Izuku a lot, just like Blackwidow. That is why it was amazing to see her bond with Ochako, and then devastating to have that taken away without letting the audience witness Toga’s complete healing.

Therefore, dying “your own way”, is only empowering if the female character had already had time to complete their character arc and heal their trauma in the same way that their male peers were allowed. Otherwise, it feels fake.

This chapter was overall amazingly well written. I enjoyed it a lot. Honestly, I enjoy MHA as a whole a lot!!! I’ve hyper-fixated on this story and tis characters a lot, and have a lot of faith in Horikoshi as a writer. I have no doubt that he’ll do a great job writing the other characters in this final arc give the audience a satisfying conclusion. I also hope that I’m proven wrong and somehow Toga ends up ok.

But the ending reminded me of how far writing has to go in order to accurately portray the female and queer experience, and to give such characters hopeful endings like everyone else. Toga deserves to find acceptance. She deserves to find love from society as a whole, not just Ochako.

Toga Himiko deserves a happy ending. Queer women deserve happy endings too.

Sorry to be a downer, everyone. If you want a more hopeful meta for this chapter, then please go check out @pikahlua’s blog because their meta on this chapter was spectacular and mind blowing.

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