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starktonyx · 2 months ago

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Alone in this shitty world (Bucky Barnes x Reader x John Walker)

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Word count: 2.4k

Description: After Yelena’s sudden outburst, the group scatters around the streets of New York. And, as if this wasn’t already the weirdest day of your life, you find yourself reaching to comfort the last person you ever thought you'd feel sorry for, John Walker. And Bucky is as confused as you are.

Content warnings: Supersoldier!reader, John Walker being a bitch as usual, protective boyfriend Bucky, mental health talk, hurt/comfort.

Note: After watching Walker’s storyline in this movie I felt like I needed to write some hurt/comfort with him. Enjoy!

Masterlist

"So, what kind of super serum you both get?" Alexei's thick accent cuts through the silence.

You were sharing the front cabin of a stolen truck, Bucky behind the wheel, you in the middle, and Alexei by the window. He'd already declared the ride to Valentina's location a 'super soldier party', clearly over the moon about the whole thing.

"I ... uh don't know. Regular? Hydra" Bucky is the first to answer, quickly brushing off what he considered to be an irrelevant topic. Alexei on the other hand, reacted like it was the only thing he'd been wanting to know the whole time.

"Hydra! Ohh, fancy" Alexei grinned wide, Bucky just huffed at his excitement. "I got something mixed, still good, still powerful" he puffed his chest a little. "And you, pretty one, what is your serum ah?"

"Uh ... mine was Shield's. It was developed from Steve's dna" You reply. Alexei's face lights up with more amazement.

"Ayy Shield! Straight from captain Rogers. She gets the premium brand, ah winter soldier?" He speaks to Bucky like he was breaking news, the latter just nodded absentmindedly.

"A super soldier couple, ha! what are the odds? you two lovely creatures made for each other, strong, beautiful and dangerous. Like spy movie" his laugh booms through the cabin as he pats a heavy hand on Bucky's shoulder.

Bucky pretends to ignore him, eyes still on the road, but his smirk was undeniable.

You just gave Alexie an amused smile, then gently squeezed Bucky's hand resting on the wheel. Without hesitation, he brought your hand to his lips, pressing a soft kiss on it without taking his eyes off the road. Alexei just watched with a knowing grin.

Bucky kept driving in silence, enjoying the calm before of the storm, because once you found Valentina, and her new shiny creation, at the former avengers tower, all hell broke loose.

God, how you missed being back in that truck.

Now, you were limping away from the tower where Bob– or Sentry now, whatever the hell Valentina was calling him now, had beaten the living shit out of all you. Your thoughts were cut short when you noticed Yelena snapping at everyone.

"What, it's my turn now?" Walker asked defensively, his tone only adding fuel to Yelena's anger.

"Oh no, you already know you're a piece of shit. And your family knows too" Yelena shots back without missing a beat.

"Wow" he muttered, his eyes dropping to the bent shield in his hands. He didn't argue to that, he didn’t know how to.

"Yelena, you're not alone in this–" you started, but she cut you off before you could finish.

"You shut up! We're all alone in this shitty world, you only say that cause you have Bucky" She cries out, her finger pointed at you like a dagger.

You didn't fight back to her, you knew she wasn't lashing out at you, not really. Maybe it was the pressure, maybe it was the just the fear taking over her.

Bucky turned to you, curious about your reaction, but your small smile was enough to say 'I'm okay'. She wasn't wrong, after all.

Then your gaze drifted to John, when you noticed from the corner of your eye his posture had shifted. It wasn't only anger you saw in him, it was something heavier. Something that stuck with you longer than it should've.

Normally you would just ignore Walker, silence had always been your preferred way to keep your sanity intact around him. But this time you couldn't help it, you kept your eyes on him a little bit longer.

And you saw it.

The way mentioning his family made his entire demeanor shift. The same reaction you saw the first time Bucky brought them up. And now Yelena had rubbed it in, like salt in an open wound.

You couldn't believe it, and would probably never admit it out loud, but you felt something for John Walker.

Pity.

The next thing you knew, the group had scattered, everyone going in different directions after Yelena's outburst.

And without really thinking, with Bucky walking by your side, you walked towards the same direction Walker had taken. You didn't exactly know why, but you felt like you needed to say something to him.

"This is a mess, doll" Bucky sighs, eyes scanning around like he would find an answer in the clueless people walking by. "I didn't think I'd come to this, but I think I should call Sam"

"Uh huh. Sure, let's call Sam. He can totally take down Sentry" Your tone was half sarcastic half distracted, as your gaze darted around trying to find John, who had walked fast enough to get lost in the busy streets of New York.

"I think he might know something– wait, are you okay, doll? What are you looking for?" Bucky stopped walking, but you didn't, giving him no choice but to catch up.

"Huh?" You ask, barely registering the question.

And then you spotted it, a flash of black and red cutting through the crowd, stomping rather than walking.

"There he is!" Your voice lit up, picking up your pace to reach your target. "Walker!" You shouted his name, loud and clear. No way he didn't hear you, not with his enhanced hearing. The way he sped up to get further from you confirmed it.

"Okay now, Walker?" Bucky asks, completely baffled. As far as he knew none of you could stand the guy.

"Listen honey" You say softly, weaving between pedestrians "I love you, but it wasn't cool to bring up in front of everyone that his wife took his baby and left him. They're just gonna keep throwing it in his face now"

Bucky shifted slightly, but still defensive. "Yeah well, he doesn't exactly make it easy not to"

"I know" you admitted. "But weirdly enough we're all stuck in this shit show together. We might as well try to work with him" You pause for a second, knowing you could catch up to Walker anytime now. "Just give me a second with him Buck, please babe?" You bat your eyelashes at him.

He gave you a long look, raising an eyebrow, clearly ready to protest. But he knew what you were doing. And you knew he knew.

"Alright" he grunts, rolling his eyes. "I'll be right behind you. With my favorite knife. In case you need me to stab him for you, doll" He flashed you an ironic smile, and you nodded back amused.

You turned back around and quickened your pace, finally catching up to Walker. Bucky kept his promise, a hand resting on his knife holder as he trailed behind you at what he considered a safe distance.

"Walker!" You called again, now standing just behind him.

"For fuck's sake, give me a break!" He came to an abrupt halt, turning around to face you, but still keeping his distance. "What, Y/N?” His harsh tone pulled you straight out of your rush.

"Wow, okay. I didn't really think this through" you admitted, realizing you hadn't actually planned what to say.

"You know what? I'm done. I'm done with everyone making fun of me. I get it, okay? I suck. What's new?" He threw his hands in the air dramatically, bitterly trash-talking himself.

"About what Yelena said—"

"Oh, I heard her just fine. And she's right, isn't she? You're all right. I'm a fucking asshole. That's why my family left, why everyone hates me" He continues letting the anger speak for himself.

But now that you stared at him for a little longer, instead of seeing the prick he portrayed in front of everyone, you could see underneath all that rage, there was something much softer.

Hurt.

So you didn't get defensive, instead, you speak softly to him.

"That's not true, John"

He froze. Taken aback by the fact that you've never called him by his first name before.

"Really? Be fucking honest with me" His voice cracked just slightly. "Cause everyone's made it pretty damn clear"

"We don't hate you" you said carefully. "You're just... hard to be around sometimes" You explain, his brows lifted at your honesty. "Look, I'm not trying anything here. I just want to talk, okay?. That's all"

He looks around, hesitant at first, but decides to drops his guard. He rolls his eyes before taking a step closer to you, never admitting he was curious about what you had to say. You pretend to not notice the sheen in his eyes once he's close to you.

He looks behind you, catching a sight of Bucky in the distance, arms on his hips, watching your interaction like a hawk.

"Don't worry about him, he's keeping watch" you brush it off, slightly amused.

And after a deep breath, you start.

"So, you know how the serum works, right? It …enhances everything"

He gave a faint nod, prompting you to continue.

"It can make the good parts of you better, but it can also make the worst parts unbearable" you continue, letting memories you had buried down a long time ago, come to the surface. " When I first lost Bucky and Steve, back in the 40's, I was completely consumed by grief, by this ...” You pause for a second, searching for the right word. “Emptiness” you continued.

“They were all I had back then, and suddenly all my days just went by, all alone. Until one day Peggy Carter contacted me, offering me a spot on a super serum program. She said it was developed from the last blood sample taken of Steve” That seemed to finally peak his interest.

“It was quite experimental but I didn't mind, I had nothing left to lose. So I said yes, because I felt like that was my way to honor them, but deep down, I just wanted to be strong enough to destroy Hydra myself." You let out a bitter breath.

"As you can imagine, I was in no condition to take the serum. But once I did? that emptiness only grew louder. I lost control. I let all my pain out on the battlefield, told myself it was for the greater good. But really, I just wanted to hurt the world as much as it had hurt me" You confess to him, not being able to make eye contact. He didn't mind, he just listened attentively, finding he related to you in more ways than he could have ever imagined. "It went on like that for a long time, and I thought I would never stop feeling that anger. And then one day, the loss felt lighter, the emptiness began to fade away. That's when I finally stared seeing things clearer" You finally lift your gaze to meet his eyes through your glassy ones.

"That anger you feel inside you? It's real, it's the serum turning the volume up on your worst pain, but it's not everything you will ever be" You explain, and now it's his turn to drop his gaze to the floor. "I know what it feels like to drown in that, I know how hard it is to climb out of it, but trust me, it will fade eventually. I got Bucky back. I got my miracle. Maybe you'll get yours one day"

He bitterly chuckles.

"It doesn't feel that way. I'm just ... too messed up" He mumbles, and you shake your head.

"Look around, Walker. Every one of us is messed up too" you chuckle ironically, gesturing vaguely behind you. "We're all running on red numbers here. The only difference is, our worst mistakes weren't, you know... broadcasted to the whole world" You carefully admit, remembering his public incident back in Latvia.

You paused, then added softly. "I'm sorry yours were"

He didn't say anything right away, just blinked a few times, processing everything you told him.

"Thank you" It came out quiet, but it was honest.

It was is the kindest someone had treated him since the day his wife left.

"You know, it's never too late to start over with us" You admit, referring to the new dysfunctional group you had accidentally became a part of. “So, are you? with us?" You question.

He lingers for a second, before he gives you a small nod. He didn't have to say much, you could see how much your words meant to him by the way he looked at you. It was different than before.

You patted his shoulder gently and nod happily, before turning to head back to Bucky.

Walker notices Bucky's face shift into a smile the second he saw you coming. And just before you were too far away, you hear his voice once again.

"You know... I can see why he's so protective of you. He's lucky to share this shitty world with you" He grants, hinting back at what Yelena said earlier. A smile tugs at your lips.

Before you could turn around to respond, a sudden explosion cracked through the air, followed by pedestrian’s screams. Chaos erupted in the streets as people began running in every direction.

You barely had time to process it before you caught the sound of something heavy crashing down, a huge chunk of concrete, straight above you.

In less than a second, two super soldiers blocked the blow, Walker with his dented shield raised above you and Bucky with his vibranium arm braced against the falling debris that shattered around them.

Even though you were as much of a super soldier as he was, Bucky still protected you like you were made of glass.

"Are you okay, doll?" he asked immediately. His hands swiftly dusting away little rests of concrete off your suit, eyes scanning your body for any injuries.

From the corner of your eye, you noticed Walker doing the same, he was more subtle, but still watching you closely, making sure you weren't hurt.

"Yes. Thank you. Both of you." You nodded quickly, still catching your breath.

Bucky gave a short nod in Walker's direction, a silent acknowledgment.

Then your eyes lifted, and your heart dropped.

"Oh my god" You exclaimed, horrified at the sight. The people who had been running were now vanishing. One by one, melted into silhouettes.

You looked back to Walker, desperation setting in.

"You're with us, right?" You ask one more time.

This time, his nod came without hesitation.

"Great" you said, turning now towards Bucky. He nodded firmly, ready to jump into action. "Let's go"

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comments and reblogs save author’s lives, thank you so much for reading <3

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techtalksonthego · 2 years ago

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Hire React Native App Developers From Top React Native Development Company In New York

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Read here

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literaryvein-reblogs · 1 month ago

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Writing Notes: Detailed Settings

A detailed setting draws your readers into the world you’ve built, allowing them to inhabit the storyline. Learn the core elements of setting, and apply them to your own writing.

How to Create a Vivid Setting for Your Story

Writing vividly is all about evoking clear imagery and detail in the mind of the reader. Here’s how to create a richly textured world for your story:

Use place to your advantage. Place denotes both geographical location and immediate surroundings. A story that unfolds in the hurried chaos of New York is not the same if transplanted to an isolated island in the Pacific. A scene that takes place in a cramped room shifts when it occurs in a vast forest.

Make use of time. Time in setting can be expressed as a time of day, a season or time of year, or a historical time period. Seasonal changes—the advent of winter, a blistering summer—might provide life or death stakes; historical periods define the behavior of all the characters operating within your fictional world.

Show the world through your characters’ eyes. Try to reveal the world as the characters interact with it, since the most resonant setting descriptions are the ones that come somewhat altered through the lens of an individual. If you’re writing historical fiction, for example, you may be pulling from a real place or time. Snippets of accuracy can give palpable energy to your prose. As with anything that requires lots of research, knowing what to include can be a balancing act: too much detail, and the reader is overwhelmed.

Be aware of how setting affects emotions. Allow setting to influence your characters’ actions and moods. Otherwise, they and the world they live in will come across as static and lacking nuance. The lives of humans—or mythical creatures living in fantasy worlds—are intimately tied to setting.

Exercises for Writing Vivid Settings

Try these writing exercises to develop a strong story setting and see where it takes your narrative:

Visit a real-world location you’ve never been to before. This can be an actual place from a setting you’ve chosen or simply a place near you that you find interesting. When you first arrive at the location, don’t record or photograph or write anything down, just spend some time absorbing it through your senses. Pay attention to the things that strike you most. Go home later and write a description of the place. Remember to include the sensory details—what it felt and smelled and sounded like.

Select an important location from your novel or short story. This could be anything—a public building, a business, a famous landmark, a landscape, or someone’s house. Now choose two characters from your story and write a short paragraph describing how they might react to the setting. Explore different points of view of your chosen place.

Choose places and write them on index cards. Organize them according to how you think a story should unfold at those locations. Would it make more sense for your characters to move from one theme to another (e.g. from religious buildings to scientific ones)? What’s the most efficient way to organize them? Would a random route be more interesting?

Focus on memorable details. Keep the details grounded in a character’s sensory experience. Everyone probably knows what a tree looks like, so if you’re describing one, tell the reader what makes it different or why it’s important from your character’s point of view. You’ll want to let your reader know what it feels like for the character, what it sounds and smells and tastes like. No matter what kind of world you’re creating, this technique can bring more vividness to your writing.

On an unlined sheet of paper, create a map of your world. Pay attention to detail: Even the smallest moments can help you visualize a world more clearly. Show landscape features like mountains and lakes and roads; mark cities if you have them, and note regions and counties, too. Try to match the feel of your setting. If it’s a magical world, show features pertaining to this—a dark magician’s fortress, for example.

Source ⚜ More: Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

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enjakey · 2 months ago

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How would the New York series Niki, Jake, or Sunghoon react to their reader taking off their engagement ring during an argument? (or all of them, totally up to you) (if you wanna do this)

AHHHHH I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FOR ASKING THIS ITS MY FIRST REQUEST FOR THIS SERIES. and if you don’t mind I only did the three as I have not formed proper personalities for the others yet. HOPE YOU ENJOY (it’s a little long).

MASTERLIST

JAKE

“Do you think you’ll ever stop modelling?”

Jake asked you that question casually. He didn’t mean harm by it- it was just a passing thought he had while you were watching a movie together. You were snuggled into his side, his arm draped over you.

But for some reason, the question seemed to offend you. You shifted slightly, craning your neck in shock to look at his face. Instinctively, feeling your anger, Jake recalled his arm.

“What is that supposed to mean?” You asked, pulling your lips together in a purse.

“No, nothing, just-” Jake sucked in a breath. “I’m not telling you to do anything here. Obviously, baby, I’m gonna support you in whatever you do,” he clarified. “I just thought-”

“Thought what?”

“That if we had kids then-”

“You think I’m not capable?” You crossed your arms, playing with your engagement ring out of frustration. It was a habit you had developed since he’d put that ring on your finger.

“I’m not saying that,” Jake raised his hands in defence. “I was simply wondering.”

“Right…”

“And honestly, I’d always thought. If I ever get married, I’d spoil my wife. Let her enjoy a life at home while I provide-”

“Jake, that’s cute but I like modelling-“

As you said it, your engagement ring had slipped off your finger. It was by mistake- honestly speaking. It was just a slip of the finger. And it landed in the couch, right in between the pair of you.

And Jake saw it, sparkling against the dull fabric of the couch.

He looked at the ring. Then he looked at you.

“Y/N, what the fuck,” he said, voice a bit raised. “It was just a question.”

“What? No-” you rushed to put it back on. “It slipped off, I swear-”

Jake was angry, you could tell. He was making that face- jaw clenched, brows pulled together, lips pursed. Jake angry was not a pretty sight.

“Do that again, I swear to God, Y/N,” he huffed. “It’s not funny.”

SUNGHOON

The topic of moving to a new apartment had been in the talks for a few months now. Ever since you’d gotten engaged, Sunghoon was persistent on living together. He said that was how it was with his parents- that back in the day, the second they got engaged, they started building a house to move in together and start their family. Plus, he was just too clingy (not in a bad way).

“I like coming home to you,” he had said. “It’s comforting.”

And it wasn’t that you had an issue with it. You were excited to live with him. To be a homebody with him- despite the fact that most of your things were already in his apartment and you were there most of the time anyway- was something you knew you couldn’t wait to experience. But it was just… stressful.

To look for an apartment in New York wasn’t easy- it was a whole job in itself. And your job at NYU was already taking up most of your time and soon, you were even on your way to a dig for a few months.

Knowing all this, Sunghoon assured he’d bear the burden of looking for the apartment. All you had to do was respond to his video calls and messages while he was house hunting. And it wasn’t that he was doing it all alone. Most of his friends, especially Jay, were also helping him.

But you didn’t even seem interested while he would fill you in about apartment hunting. Sunghoon had even taken a few days off from being a skating coach for this while you barely paid any head to it- always busy correcting papers or in meetings that stretched too long because the head of department was a pain in the ass.

And you weren’t trying to be distant or uninterested about it. It truly was just stressful and with exam season looming around, all your students seemed to be needing extra help and guidance with study material.

You’d come home late everyday and would usually sleep without dinner. And you were just so exhausted.

And Sunghoon knew this- he really did. And it wasn’t that he was mad at you- he was stressed too. He was stressed about not finding a suitable apartment yet, stressed about you being too busy with work, stressed about how nothing seemed to be going his way.

One day, over a lazy dinner of ramen and rice, Sunghoon just snapped. He couldn’t take it anymore, your lack of enthusiasm and his lack of progress.

“I just wish you’d be a little more excited about this,” he said, rolling his eyes and gripping his hair. His food was pushed to the side, elbows slamming on the table.

You kept your spoon down slowly, letting your head hang heavy. “Sunghoon, I’m excited. Obviously I’m excited. I’m just so busy and exhausted-”

“You’ve been saying that for months- I’m exhausted too,” he pushed himself out of the chair, making his way to the hall.

You followed him, guilt weighing on your chest.

“Hoon, I’m sorry. I’m so damn sorry,” you cried. “I wish I had more energy for this too but you gotta understand. I’m about to travel soon. My students are on edge-”

“Screw your damn students,” he was yelling now. But he didn’t mean any harm. He was just… sad. He was sad that his effort wasn’t being acknowledged. He was sad he was doing this without you. And he just wanted you by his side while preparing for their new step together.

His eyes were welling with tears now. But you didn’t notice, offended by what he said.

You folded your arms together and your brows pulled together. Sunghoon knew he messed up by saying that. He knew how much you adored your students- he knew the lengths you’d go for them. Once, you took them all out for lunch just because one of them said- in passing- that they were too broke to even buy a meal.

But in that moment? Nothing mattered more than his emotional weight.

“That’s not fair,” you snapped. “You don’t get to shit on my students.”

“Well you pretty much said fuck you to living together,” Sunghoon folded his arms too. “Just say it. Say you don’t wanna live together. Stop beating around the bush because I’m tired-”

“Fuck you,” you rolled your eyes. “Stop projecting. I’m fucking tired, too. Can’t you just… just accept that I wanna live with you? It’s just terrible fucking timing, Hoon. You know this. You know this time of the year is most stressful for me.”

“You’re so busy that you can’t even respond to my texts? To a call?”

“I’m usually in class.”

“Fuck, Y/N,” he broke. He was ready to crumble. Sunghoon collapsed onto his couch, dragging his palms down his face. His looked down at his lap, sighing.

Sunghoon saw you, from the corner of his eyes, discarding your jewellery. You usually did that when you felt heavy and overstimulated. Your necklace, your earrings and your rings were placed on the table and then-

And then your engagement ring.

His head shot up, eyes blood shot as he scanned your face. You were sighing too, kneeling in front of him with your head in your hands.

He couldn’t understand what it meant.

And he started to panic.

“Y/N-”

The crack in his house had you lifting your head. He looked distressed, like he was just told terrible truth.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I’m being an asshole about this,” he reached for your hands, trying to pull you up. “We can work through this, I swear.”

As he pulled you into his lap, desperately moving closer to find your lips, you looked at him puzzled. Your hands pushed against his chest, confused at the tears that started to streak his cheeks. Your heart cracked at the sight- Sunghoon never cried, not like this.

You cupped his face, fingers swiping at his wet cheeks. “Hoon, I’m sorry, too. It’s okay, we’re both stressed. We should just take a break-”

“What do you mean, a break?” His eyes darting across your face, his lips pulled downwards.

He looked like a puppy- a sad, sad, lost from home puppy. You didn’t know what to do.

“Don’t do this to me-”

“Sunghoon, once exam season is over we can look for apartments together, okay?” You said, tilting your head. “Until then, let’s just chill. Let’s take a break- I think we both need it-”

“I don’t want a break. Y/N, a break? You’re serious?”

“Baby, I meant let’s go out for ice cream or something,” you said, pulling your brows together. “What on Earth are you on about?”

“… your engagement ring,” his hand moved from your waist to point behind you, at the pristine and shinning wedding ring that sat on the coffee table.

“Oh, my God,” you scrambled off him, moving to wear your engagement ring again. “Baby, I’m so sorry,” you cupped his cheeks again. “Force of habit.”

Sunghoon looked up at you, his features relaxing with a breath of relief. “Don’t ever do that again. I thought I was going to fucking die.”

NIKI

“You don’t like Sinners?”

“Yeah, it’s a bit mid,” he said, throwing his keys onto the kitchen counter.

You had just come back to his house after watching the film and you were raving about it throughout the car ride. After all, to become a director was what you were studying towards and Ryan Coogler was one of your favourite directors.

“It’s not as good as Black Panther-”

“But it’s unfair to compare the two,” you said, crossing your arms. “Sinners is more culturally rooted.”

“Yeah, see. You know that cuz you’re movie buff. You do this for a living,” he pointed a hand at you, not realising how offended you actually were. “What about the people who just watch it for the entertainment?”

“You’re saying you didn’t like the visuals?” You raised your brows.

“Don’t you think they romanticised slavery a little bit?”

“Did you and I watch the same movie?” You were tapping your foot now. “I literally just ranted about everything about the film in the car. Were you even listening?”

“Of course I was-”

“No you weren’t. You never listen,” your voice raised a bit and Niki was taken aback. “You think you’re so cool and know everything about films like you forget this is literally what I spent so many years studying and doing-”

“No, Y/N, I-”

“Like, seriously. Why can’t you just listen? This is the one thing I’m passionate about. I’ve built my whole life around movies and somehow, you take that side of me so lightly-”

“I'm not taking it lightly! I just didn’t like the movie, Y/N!”

“It’s never just the movie with you. It’s always some stupid one-liner and you acting like you’re too cool to care.”

Your voice was already shaking when you stopped talking, and the weight of your anger was sitting too heavy on your chest to keep standing still. You turned, pulled the engagement ring off your finger, and placed it- too gently- on the counter between you. Not thrown. Just… placed. Like it was louder that way.

Niki went completely still.

His expression flickered from irritated to confused to absolutely floored in under two seconds.

“What are you doing?” he said. His voice was quieter now, no longer defensive- just stunned. “Y/N…”

He didn’t move toward the ring. He didn’t touch it. He just stared at you like the gesture had knocked the wind out of him.

You didn’t say anything at first. You crossed your arms, tried to keep your face from falling apart.

“I’m not saying I’m walking away,” you muttered, eyes on the floor. “I’m just- I don’t know. I needed you to see that this mattered. That you not listening mattered.”

He blinked, like he hadn’t even realised what this argument had turned into. Then slowly, he took a step forward, hands still down by his sides.

“I’m sorry,” he said- he wasn't being sarcastic. He was sincere. “I was being a dick. I didn’t get the movie, and I didn’t want to admit I didn’t get it. So I said some dumb shit instead.”

You stayed quiet.

Niki glanced at the ring on the counter like it was radioactive. “I didn’t think you’d take it off over something like this.”

“It’s not about the movie, Niki,” you said, voice finally steady. “It’s about how easy it is for you to dismiss something that means everything to me.”

That landed. You could tell. He scratched the back of his neck, looked down at the floor, then back up at you.

“Okay,” he said. “Got it. No more dismissing. I’ll let you school me on everything from colour grading to lighting to… whatever else makes me sound smart next time we’re at a screening.”

You bit back a laugh, but it slipped through anyway, because of course he couldn’t help it.

“I hate you,” you muttered.

He grinned. “Nah, you love me. You just wanna fight me sometimes.”

You shook your head. And then- because you didn’t want to fight anymore- you reached across the counter, picked up the ring, and slid it back onto your finger.

Niki let out the tiniest breath of relief. “Thank God. That was the scariest two minutes of my life.”

“You’ve jumped out of a plane before.”

“Yeah, and that was less terrifying.”

248 notes · View notes

arlana-likes-to-write · 3 months ago

Note

Can you please do wandanat x daughter reader were she has powers let's say like sonic. And she tries to hide them but it gets hard and she ends up in a fight with her parents and during Wich she accidentally yells about it and like instantly goes quite and how they would react please and thank you.

A Hidden Part of Me

Note: So I changed the power the read has because I didn't want it to be to much like Pietro. The power I choice added more angst to the story (which everyone knows I love). Also, sorry for being MIA I wanted this story out sooner but I think I'm developing carpal tunnel and I got sick. But please enjoy!

Warning: angst, angst with a happy ending (?), headaches, throwing up, dubious consent (it makes sense when you read it), mention of past death, self harm (?), trauma, lots and lots of trauma, x-men mention!, no physical description but reader does have long hair

Word Count: 5.1k

At this point, it was easier to keep it a secret. You had been with Wanda and Natasha for a few years but officially adopted only for 5 months. It was by accident that you ran into the couple. They were in California to help Scott with an Avenger issue. It so happened that the group they were after was after you, too. You gave them information critical to their mission. You thought that was it. That you would never see the Avengers again. However, the couple wasn’t too happy about letting you live alone, especially on the streets.

You moved into the Avenger compound in upstate New York. Nothing was holding you to California anyway. You enrolled in a home school program, worked out with Peter, and fell in love with spending time with Helen in the med bay. The Avengers welcomed you into their family, and you felt safe with Natasha and Wanda. Two years passed, and they officially adopted you. So, a hidden part of you was kept a secret.

They asked why The Syndicate was after you, and you told them you weren’t sure. That was the truth. You weren’t sure the Syndicate knew what you were capable of. Then, it never came up again. So why would you tell them? Being a part of the team wasn’t part of your ideal future. At most, you would want to help Helen in the med bay. You weren’t a fighter. Deep down, you were scared to tell them. Maybe they would see you differently when they discovered you were the reason you were alone.

Besides, it was easy to fight it. The urge to use your powers felt like a prick on the back of your neck. Sometimes, a headache would emerge, but you had remedies for those. So you pushed through. Ignored it. Time would pass, and the feeling would go away. For the past 10 years, you had it under control, and that was how it was going to be.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

A nagging headache pounded at your temples. No medication would touch it to help soothe it. Every sound made it worse. It came at a horrible time, too. You had a to-do list a mile on that consisted of essays, studying, and writing a speech for a conviction you were invited to. Every movement or bright light causes you to fight nauseous.

You called out sick with your internship with Helen and laid on the couch with a cold towel over your eyes. You were in Wanda and Natasha’s little apartment in the compound instead of your own. Their space felt like a blanket of safety around you. The lights were dimmed, and Wanda’s incense with lavender.

You groaned when their door opened, but their footstep stalled. It was Wanda’s soft footsteps that continued over to you. She sat on the table. “Another headache?” She asked softly. You groaned again as your answer. Her fingers undid the ponytail that held your hair up. The release of tension helped slightly.

“You’ve been getting them a lot recently,” Natasha’s voice came from the kitchen. She was trying to be quiet as she shuffled around - no doubt making tea. Chamomile tea had helped in the past, but you weren’t sure if it would help now.

“Grab some chocolate, too,” Wanda said to her girlfriend. Again, you groaned in protest. “I know, sweetheart, but it helped last time.” The last time was two days ago. Natasha wasn’t wrong when she said these headaches were more and more frequent. Suddenly, the cloth covered your eyes was removed, and you stared up at the smiling face of Wanda. Groaning, you rolled onto your side to bury your face in the cushion. “Now, when did a caveman replace my daughter?” Wanda chuckled. Huffing, you flopped back onto your back.

“Head hurts,” you mumbled.

“I know, sweetie,” Wanda cooed. Natasha walked over to you with tea and chocolate.

“Can you sit up for us?” You shrugged but slowly sat up. The room spun, and you closed your eyes tightly, pinching the bridge of your nose. You felt Wanda move behind you to offer support. “Open your mouth,” Natasha whispered. “Try to take a few sips.” As much as you wanted to, you were afraid, too. Saliva pooled in your mouth. The room spun, and you couldn’t find your center, even with your eyes closed. You reached for Wanda’s hand.

“Gonna,” you mumbled. “Gonna be sick.”

“Nat,” you heard the Black Widow move. As quickly as the redhead was gone, she was back, and something was pressed under your chin. A metal bow, you figured, when you grabbed it.

“It’s okay, med (honey),” Natasha said. “We have you.” The dame broke that you desperately tried to hold back. Your body lurched forward, dry heaving first - painful spasms that wrecked through your chest. Then bile rose, bitter and sour, burning your throat as it came up. There was nothing solid to bring up as you hadn’t eaten since yesterday.

Finally, it stopped, and you slumped back against Wanda - all of your energy was gone. Natasha left again and was back with a towel. It was warm against your skin. Gods, you hated feeling like this. Wanda pushed some of your hair out of your face and kissed your forehead. “Maybe we should take her to Helen,” Wanda said. “This isn’t good. Something must be wrong.” Natasha hummed in her agreement and took her hand. You liked the way her thumb moved back and forth against your skin.

“I don’t want to move her too much, though,” the Black Widow said. “Maybe Helen can come to us.” Usually, you hated when people talked to you like you weren’t there. You were just too tired to have any say.

You must have fallen asleep because you woke up in the couple’s bed - under the covers: an IV and a cotton ball with a tap at your elbow attached to your right arm. Helen must have taken blood. Thankfully, your headache was dulled. “Hi,” you looked at the Black Widow sitting in the chair next to the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” you answered and sat up against the headboard. “I’m guessing Helen gave me tramadol .” Natasha nodded. “Does she know what’s wrong with me?” She sighed.

“No, but she took some blood and will run a few tests. She wants to run some scans when you are feeling better.” That made sense. The headaches had to be a neurological problem, and getting scans could help. It wasn’t making sense, though; you never go sick. Even when you volunteered at the local clinic, the flu spread through the city. The last time you had a headache, this bad was 10-oh fuck.

It was like ice was injected into your veins: fear and panic. Ten years ago, these headaches were so bad you missed five days of school. Ten years ago, you sat on your family’s couch while your parents yelled at you. Ten years ago, you became an orphan, but your headaches stopped.

Before you could dwell more about it, Wanda entered the room with a fresh bowl of chicken paprikash. “I hope you are hungry because I made extra.”

“Smells great,” you lied and took the bowl from her. It was your powers that were causing these headaches, which meant everyone around you was in grave danger.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The scans confirmed your suspicion when they came back clear.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

Natasha saw much of herself in you - a scared young girl who thought she had to hold the world’s weight on her shoulders. When they first brought you to the compound, you were terrified and unsure how to act around everyone. You retreated so far into yourself that Natasha was worried she would never see you again. But as time went on, you learned to trust those around you.

Boy, was it a treat to see your personality shine through. Your laughter bounced off the walls. Your smile lit up the room, and you were so fucking brilliant. It amazed her how you flew through assignments. Natasha was so excited to see what the future held.

Now, something was wrong. These headaches were driving you further and further away from them. You pulled back. You kept to yourself, and Natasha was beginning to forget the sound of your laugh. At any given moment, you quickly would leave the room when someone entered. But there were times Natasha could look at you before you left. Your eyes were a million miles away, and you looked exhausted. She’s never seen you like this before. Your absence was taken a toll on Wanda and the team.

The witch desperately wanted to fix what was going on. But it was hard when they had no idea what was broken. The Black Widow was tired of walking on eggshells around you. Hell, the entire team was. She needed to comfort you and figure out what was happening.

The intervention happened during team bonding. The TV had Mario Kart on while Sam, Peter, Bucky, and Steve raced against each other. Bruce was talking with Maria and Yelena regarding an upcoming mission. Wanda and Vision were talking over a game of rummy. That left Natasha with Tony. The billionaire was behind the bar mixing a mocktail for himself. “So,” Tony said. “Any idea what’s going on with that kid of yours?” Natasha huffed and took a sip of her drink.

“No idea,” she mumbled. “Every time I try to talk to her, she runs away. It’s like she’s scared.”

“Of what? You and the witch?” Tony questioned. The Black Widow shrugged. Maybe you were. At surface level, they were good parents. But one look into their dark and complicated past would scare anyone off. “Nah, that ain’t it. She looks scared of herself.” Natasha looked at Tony.

“What do you mean?” Tony sighed and took a long sip of the drink he made.

“I’ve seen the same look on everyone’s face in this room, including mine. At one point or another, we’ve all been scared of what we are capable of,” he shrugged. “Besides, we never found out why The Syndicate was after her.”

He had a point. But if you had a gift like Wanda or Carol, why hide it? You were surrounded by different people unless Tony was right, which Natasha hated to admit, and you were scared.

The sound of footsteps approaching caused Natasha to look. It was you - dressed in an oversized hoodie and sweatpants. A pair of headphones were over your ears. Gods, you looked terrified and turned away quickly to leave, but Natasha was quicker. “Hey,” she waved at you to get your attention. Luckily, you stopped and took your headphones off, winching slightly. Were you experiencing another headache? “Why don’t you stay? Hang out for a little bit. I know Peter has been dying to beat you in Mario Kart.” Peter looked at you when he heard his name and waved.

“I can’t,” you said. “Super busy with school.” You were fiddling with your hands in front of you. “Maybe another night.” Natasha sighed as you turned around.

“Why are you doing this?” She asked. “Why are you putting a wall between us and you?” You stopped walking at her questions, hands falling to the side and flexing into fists.

“Can we not do this here?” You asked. Natasha could tell you said it through gritted teeth.

“If not here, then when?” she countered. You run away every time we try to talk to you.” Natasha heard Wanda’s footsteps walking by her side.

“Sweetheart, we just want to help.”

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

Help? How could they help you when there was no answer to your problem? You squeezed your eyes shut. You were too weak. The simple solution was to leave the compound, but you wanted to stay even when it endangered everyone you loved. Gods, you were a fucking monster. “You can’t help me,” you whispered. “This is the way it has to be.”

“Why are you acting like a goddman martyr?” Natasha asked. Slowly, you turned to face them. Everyone on the team seemed to be locked in on this fight. It was a long time coming. You could feel the tension every time you entered the room. ‘We are a family. We figure things out as a family.”

“You think I want this? Do you think I like isolating myself from all of you? I hate it! But I didn’t ask for this because this is how it has to be,” you yelled, wincing slightly. The headache, which was a dull pulse, was intensifying. You pressed your fingers against your temple as if you could squeeze the pain out, but it throbbed - pulsing waves that started behind your eyes and spread like wildfire across your forehead and down your neck.

Groaning, you hunched forward. The pain was causing your stomach to twist and turn. You felt like you were going to throw up. “Sweetheart,” to blinded by the pain, you missed when Wanda walked over to her. A gentle hand now placed on your back.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” you recoiled away from her, accidentally slapping her across the face.

“Hey, that was so uncalled for,” Natasha looked over Wanda’s face. A small mark formed when you hit her.

It was all too much. The noise. The attention. The pain. You wanted it all to stop. You pressed your palms to your temples. The pressure wasn’t helping. Panic swirled around you. Each breath you took was choppy and swallowed. “Gotta make it stop,” you mumbled. “Gotta make it stop.”

Everyone was talking. Everyone was saying your name. But the worst of all, you heard their blood swirling through their veins. Every heartbeat in this room echoed inside your head. The prickle at the back of your neck became impossible to ignore. “Please stop!” You yelled and threw your arms to the side. Finally, the noise stopped. The headache was gone, but the reason behind it all twisted your stomach in shame.

Everyone was frozen, their eyes wide in shook and fear—except Vision. The android slowly stood up. “What are you doing, Miss?” he asked.

You ignored him. Your fingers twitched as if you were plucking invisible strings. Their body obeyed you - they were no longer in control. Clenching your hands into fists, they fell—one by one, your family to their knees, then to the ground. Everyone expect Natasha. She was fighting it - fighting you. Her eyes darted to yours in panic. Tears were streaking down her face. Her shoulders trembled. “I’m sorry.” And you were; that wasn’t a lie.

You punched your hand forward, and Natasha finally fell to the ground. Unlike the past, you had a little more control over your powers. They weren’t dead, just unconscious. It would give you time to come up with a plan. “Don’t come after me, Vision,” you looked at the android. “I don’t want to be found.”

As quickly as possible, you ran out of the compound, leaving the only family you knew behind.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

Wanda’s head was spinning. It felt like she tried to out-drink Steve and Bucky, and they used Asgardian ale. A gentle hand was able to bring her back to reality. Her eyes fluttered open, and she saw Vision staring down at her. “Easy,” he spoke softly. “I’ve alerted Helen and the medical staff. They should be here shortly.” Against her better judgment, Wanda tried to sit up. The world spun, and she threw up the little food in her system. “Ah, yes, the same thing occurred to Sergeant Barnes when he woke up.”

Once her stomach settled, she sat up and looked around the room. The entire time was in different levels of waking up. She was leaning heavily against the android as she looked at Natasha. Her girlfriend wasn’t moving. Luckily, Helen arrived and rushed over to her first. There was dried blood underneath the Black Widow’s nose. “Viz,” Wanda whispered. “What happened?” The android sighed.

“I witnessed it, and I’m not entirely sure.”

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

Everyone sat in the conference room, an IV attached to their arms that was pumping fluid, pain, and nauseous medication. The only ones not here were Natasha and Peter. She had to be taken to the med bay for further testing. Tony refused Peter to enter the meeting. Wanda knew why through the security feed of the events that transpired. Natasha fought against whatever you were doing to them. Then you ran. Vision told the group you wished not to be followed. Like hell, that was going to happen. Tony groaned. “I feel like I’m hungover,” he said. “I hate this feeling. It’s why I quit drinking.”

“Shit was unnatural,” Sam shivered. “Felt my blood was betraying me.”

“And I’m guessing you and Natasha had no idea about whatever this is?” Maria asked. Wanda shook her head. There were moments when Wanda would accidentally venture into your mind. It was never on purpose, but she never saw this. Either you never thought about it or hid it away from her.

“What do we do?” Bucky asked. “She’s alone and probably terrified.” Steve rubbed his hands over his face and ruffled his head.

“The correct course of action would be to report it to Ross.” Yelena scuffed and shook her head. “What is it?”

“We all know what will happen to her if this gets out,” Wanda squeezed her hands into a fist. Ross and the council would throw you into the RAFT like they tried to do with her.

“What do you purpose, Miss. Belova?” The younger Black Widow locked eyes with her. Natasha liked to joke that you made Yelena soft. The Blonde became an aunt to you so effortlessly no one batted an eye.

“We do not report it, and we keep here where she is safe.”

“And what if this happens again?” Tony questioned. What if she loses control and this happens again?” he raised his arm with the IV in it.

“She is my daughter,” Wanda finally said. She’s family, and we don’t turn our backs on family. If she gets her powers under control, then she can stay here.”

“How do we train her?” Bruce questioned. “I have never seen anything like this before.” Wanda sighed. She sat at a table with an android who was given life by a stone, a man who turned into a Hulk, and two soldiers from World War 2. They were all definitions of ‘never seen anything like this.’ But for some reason, you were the abnormality - the one unable to get her powers under control. It was out of fear - they were terrified of an 18-year-old girl.

“Then I have another option,” She spun around to see Natasha. She looked paler than usual with dark circles under her eyes, but she was awake, alive, and standing.

“Nat, shouldn’t you be resting?” Wanda asked, standing up to approach her girlfriend. But Natasha waved her off and walked over to the table - hands resting on top of it - as Wanda sat back down.

“If we all agree to keep what she is capable of between us, then I have an idea. " At first, no one said anything, and Wanda held her breath. Finally, one by one, they all agreed to keep your power a secret. “Then I think we should send her to Xavier.”

“What?” Wanda exclaimed. “You want to send her away. She’s going to think we are abandoning her.”

“But we aren’t,” Natasha glanced at Wanda, then looked back at the table. “She’ll return to us when she can’t hurt herself or us.” Wanda wondered if Natasha was referring to the headaches. Slowly, the redhead put her hand over Wanda’s. “What other options do we have? Xavier can help her.”

Wanda wanted to argue that there were a number of options if they just took a moment to think and did not let dear cloud their judgment. But Wanda finally took a good long look at her partner. Natasha looked shattered, like a piece of her was missing. It reminded Wanda of a time after Ultron or the night Natasha opened herself up to her and relived every painful memory of her past—a past that was haunted by a man who controlled her—just like you did.

Sighing, she squeezed Natasha’s hand. “FRIDAY, can you locate her?” The AI was quiet for a beat.

“Yes, it appears there is a heat signature that matches your daughter’s physical build in the North Woods. I can send you the exact coordinates, Miss. Maximoff.”

“Send them to me too, FRIDAY,” Wanda went to protest. “She’s my daughter too. This doesn’t change that.”

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

You weren’t sure where you were going. You ran to the forest that surrounded the compound and kept walking. No phone. No money. No plan. You tried so hard to keep it under control -to be normal. But you should have known life was very unkind to you. The cherry on top was it started to rain. You put your hood up and kept walking. The clothes you wore became soaked but you deserved it. This was the least of your worries.

The world pitied you as you stumbled upon a slight covering. You sat on the dampened forest floor with your knees to your chest. This was fine, you tried to convince yourself. This wasn’t the first time you were alone and had to find a new family. But it would be better for you to be alone.

Suddenly, a small chipmunk ran from the bush next to you. You were startled but curious as the creature moved toward you. You held out your hand but fell into your trap. With your hand outstretched, the chipmunk began to tremble. Then, the animal floated in the air, twitching unnaturally. It reminded you of a marionette.

You clenched your jaw but kept your eyes trained on the creature under your control. You wanted to face the monster that you are. Fingers remained in an invisible grip while you puppeted the creature’s veins and blood.

Once upon a time, you discovered a book about your ability. The author called blood-bending a forbidden and lost art. This wasn’t an art. This was an invasion. Your hands were inside everything, able to twist the most scared parts of any living being without consent. “I can feel it,” you muttered, voice hoarse. “The rhythm. Every pulse. Ever desperate little beat.” It came naturally to you, like breathing or walking.

Finally, you released the chipmunk. It fell in a heap, skittered a few inches, then collapsed again. You stayed put, not moving to help it. You looked away and rested your cheek on your knee. “I hate this,” you weren’t sure what you were referring to - the power, the chipmunk, or yourself.

Sighing, you closed your eyes. It wasn’t long till footsteps approached you. They belonged to Natasha. You knew it was her by the way her heartbeat and blood flowed through her veins. Like a fingerprint, everyone’s circulatory system was different. “No one has ever fought against it before,” you whispered. “I’m impressed even though it could have killed you.”

“Was your intention to kill us?”

“No,” you shook your head. “I just wanted the headaches to stop.” You wrapped your arms tighter around your legs. Wanda approached you on the other side. You liked the way their heartbeats complemented each other. They were soulmates in your eyes. “Is everyone okay?”

“They are,” Wanda answered. “Confused but okay,” she sat next to you - close enough for you to feel presence but enough space to not feel claustrophobic. “Can you tell us what happened back there?”

You kept your eyes closed. “I could do it since I was young. I think I did it subconsciously on my brothers as a little game when I was a kid. The headaches come when I don’t use it. The longer I go, the worse they are.” Finally, you opened your eyes. “I killed my family by accident,” you admitted. “My parents thought I was faking the headaches to get out of school. They were yelling, and I just snapped. I tried to wake them up, but they wouldn’t.”

Natasha finally sat down. “The police thought a home invader came in, killed my parents and brothers, and kidnapped me. Somehow, what truly happened that night was found out by The Syndicate.”

“They wanted your ability to help them,” you nodded. That was always your theory. Natasha said your name with a sigh. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I was so scared,” you felt tears running down your cheeks. “I thought I had it under control, and if you found out the truth, you’d make me leave. I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want you to know I’m a monster,” a sob left your mouth. Your body shook from the mixture of the cold or exhaustion. Tentative hands touched your shoulder, and you leaned into Wanda as the witch hugged you. “I’m so sorry,” you sobbed against her skin. They let you cry. They let you scream. At the moment, no words were going to help calm you down. Finally, your tears turned into quiet sniffles and hiccups.

Wanda cupped your cheeks in her hands. “You are not a monster, my sweet girl,” her thumb drew patterns against your reddened cheeks.

“I am,” your voice shook. “I killed my family. I almost killed all of you.”

“You have an ability that needs to be trained and managed,” Natasha said. She made no move to get closer to you. “These events were accidents.”

“Am I in a lot of trouble?” you asked. They were silent, and a quiet conversation passed between them. The longer your question went unanswered, the more anxiety filled your bones, and your heartbeat increased.

“Technically, no,” Wanda finally answered. “No one besides those in the compound knows what happened. Everyone agreed to keep it within the house.”

“Your confession about your biological family stays between the three of us,” you glanced at the Black Widow. She tried so hard to mask her true feelings, but you knew the truth. She was terrified of you. It was the way her heartbeat. Her adrenaline was through the roof. “You need to get your powers under control so the headaches stop and this never happens again. There is a school that helps.”

“You are sending me away,” you panicked.

“It is not permanent,” Wanda forced you to look back at her. “Only till you get your powers under control.” But if you never could?

“We are a family,” Natasha said. “This doesn’t change that.” You desperately wanted to believe her. You nodded and burrowed your face against Wanda’s shoulder. Everything was going to be different now.

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

6 months

“Are you ready to go home?” Professor Xavier asked. You nodded, staring patiently out the window for any sign of their car.

You arrived at Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters 6 months ago. When Natasha and Wanda dropped you off, you were determined to hate it here. But like at the compound, the other students and teachers here broke down your walls. You found another family in the other misguided individuals.

It was hard work, but Xavier helped you control your powers and manage your headaches. During your time here, you only spoke to Wanda constantly. Peter would send you texts every few days, and it was even rarer to hear from the other members of the team. Not hearing from Natasha constantly hurt.

Wanda tried to explain the Black Widow’s odd behavior. Deep-rooted trauma from her past, when a man believed he had a right to her body. Using your powers brought up unpleasant memories for her and, no doubt, Yelena. But Wanda told you Yelena was one of those who advocated for you to stay at the compound. That made you feel a little better even though you still felt awful. Guilt and regret were a constant feeling.

“Thank you for everything, Professor,” you faced the man. “I will forever be grateful.” He waved his hand.

“Nonsense, child. You have been a delight,” that was further from the truth, but it was a nice compliment. Xavier took your hand. “You will always have a home here. Whenever you need one.” You frowned slightly. Why was he saying that? Was there something he knew that you didn’t? Was Natasha and Wanda not coming for you? Xavier smiled. “Ah, I do believe your ride is here.” You looked out the window and saw a car drive through the past and up the long driveway.

Without another word, you ran out the front door to meet them. The car stopped, and your heart was pounding against your ribs. Finally, Wanda got out of the passenger side. It was like you could finally breathe normally again. They kept their promise and came back. “Mom,” you broke out into a run and hugged her. The force lifted her off the ground.

“Oh, my sweet girl, how I’ve missed you so much.” Wanda hugged you tighter. “Here, let me look at you,” you allowed her to take a step back. “You’ve cut your hair.”

“Yeah,” you smiled. “Jean said I needed a change. Do you like it?”

“I love it,” she grabbed onto your forearms. “They’ve been working you hard.” It was true. While Xavier worked on your powers and the mental side of everything, Logan and Hank were in charge of your physical training. Angel made sure they didn’t kill you.

The driver’s door opened, and you watched Natasha get out of the car. You met her at the front, approaching her slowly. “Hi, mama,” you whispered. Natasha smiled.

“Get over here, kid,” she said, meeting you halfway for a hug. You missed her hugs so much, and tears landed on your skin, but you knew you were crying too. “I missed you so much,” she said.

“Missed you too, mama,” you whispered. Natasha cupped your cheeks and kissed your forehead.

“Come on,” she threw her arm around your shoulders. “Let’s grab your things and go home.” Home. You were going home with your moms and couldn’t be more excited.

The past and future were out of your control and a little scary, but with your family by your side, you were ready to face the present.

#wandanat x reader #wandanat x you #wandanat x daughter!reader #wanda maximoff x reader #natasha romanoff x reader #wanda maximoff x natasha romanoff x reader #wanda maximoff x natasha romanoff

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aqusagtechnologies2023 · 1 month ago

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Hire MERN Stack Developers in New York: Build Scalable, Modern Web Applications

In today’s fast-evolving digital landscape, businesses in New York are seeking powerful, flexible, and scalable web solutions to stay ahead. Whether you're a startup looking to build an MVP or an established enterprise in need of a modern web application, the MERN stack offers the perfect foundation. But how do you ensure the success of your project? It all starts when you hire MERN stack developers in New York who are experienced, resourceful, and aligned with your business goals.

This guide will walk you through everything you need to know — from understanding what MERN stack is, to why it’s a great fit for your project, and how to hire the right development talent locally in New York.

What is the MERN Stack?

MERN is an acronym for a popular JavaScript tech stack used for building dynamic full-stack web applications:

MongoDB – A NoSQL database for storing data in JSON-like documents.

Express.js – A lightweight Node.js web framework for handling HTTP requests.

React.js – A front-end JavaScript library for building user interfaces.

Node.js – A JavaScript runtime that executes server-side code.

All four technologies use JavaScript, enabling developers to build both client-side and server-side logic using a single language, which speeds up development and improves maintainability.

Why Choose MERN Stack for Your Next Project?

Hiring MERN stack developers gives you access to a powerful ecosystem ideal for:

Single Page Applications (SPAs)

Progressive Web Apps (PWAs)

Real-time Collaboration Tools

Dashboards & Data Visualization Tools

E-commerce Platforms

Custom CRM and ERP Systems

The seamless integration between the front-end and back-end layers reduces development time and ensures a consistent coding approach.

Top Business Benefits of MERN Stack Development

Fast Development Cycle JavaScript across all layers minimizes context switching, enabling faster iterations and deployments.

Scalability MERN applications scale well, both horizontally and vertically. Perfect for startups and growing enterprises.

High Performance Node.js supports asynchronous processing, delivering fast server-side responses, while React’s virtual DOM boosts UI performance.

Flexibility MERN enables the development of highly customizable applications tailored to your business processes.

Community Support With thousands of developers actively contributing to each technology, continuous support and updates are guaranteed.

Why New York is a Prime Location for Hiring MERN Developers

As a global tech hub, New York boasts a vibrant developer community, innovation-driven businesses, and an ecosystem that supports digital transformation. Here’s why hiring MERN stack developers in New York is a smart decision:

Access to a Large Talent Pool: New York is home to top-tier development talent with diverse industry experience across healthcare, finance, logistics, and AI/ML.

Tech-Savvy Workforce: Developers here are not just coders but problem solvers familiar with business logic and emerging technologies.

Proximity to Clients: Hiring locally ensures better communication, cultural alignment, and face-to-face collaboration when needed.

Compliance & Legal Transparency: Working with developers within the U.S. ensures adherence to federal data protection and IP laws.

How to Hire MERN Stack Developers in New York

The hiring process should be strategic, especially when looking for developers who can align with your business vision. Here’s a step-by-step process:

Define Your Project Requirements: List features, technology needs, deadlines, and expected outcomes.

Choose the Hiring Model: Decide whether you need a freelancer, a full-time developer, or a dedicated team.

Source Candidates: Use professional networks, job boards, or specialized tech platforms to find developers.

Evaluate Technical Skills: Conduct coding tests, system design interviews, and project walkthroughs.

Check Portfolio & References: Evaluate past work and get feedback from previous clients.

Finalize Contracts: Ensure NDA, IP protection clauses, and payment terms are clearly defined.

Skills to Look for in a MERN Stack Developer

When hiring, look for a well-rounded skill set that goes beyond just coding. Essential skills include:

Technical Skills:

Proficiency in JavaScript, ES6+

Experience with MongoDB, Express.js, React.js, Node.js

RESTful API development

Familiarity with cloud platforms (AWS, Azure, etc.)

Git version control

Test-driven development (TDD)

Deployment and CI/CD pipelines

Soft Skills:

Strong problem-solving abilities

Clear communication

Agile and Scrum methodology experience

Team collaboration

Cost of Hiring MERN Stack Developers in New York

The cost can vary depending on experience, project complexity, and hiring model:

Freelancers: $50–$100/hour

Mid-Level Developers (Full-time): $90,000–$120,000/year

Senior Developers or Team Leads: $130,000–$160,000/year

Dedicated Development Teams: $6,000–$15,000/month depending on scope

Hiring in New York is an investment — but the ROI from quality local developers with strong business understanding and timely delivery is often well worth it.

Hiring Models: Freelancers, In-House, or Outsourced Teams?

Freelancers:

Pros: Cost-effective for small tasks or MVPs.

Cons: Limited availability, lack of long-term commitment.

In-House Developers:

Pros: Full-time focus, cultural alignment.

Cons: Higher cost, longer hiring cycles.

Outsourced Development Teams:

Pros: Scalable, fast onboarding, often more affordable.

Cons: Potential time zone and communication challenges (unless local).

For businesses in New York, a local outsourced team combines the best of both worlds — cost efficiency and location alignment.

Common Use Cases for MERN Stack Applications

Businesses across industries are leveraging MERN stack for:

Healthcare platforms with secure patient data access

Fintech dashboards with real-time data

Logistics apps with real-time tracking and analytics

AI/ML-powered analytics tools

eCommerce websites with dynamic user experiences

SaaS products tailored for B2B and B2C

These applications benefit from MERN's dynamic rendering, real-time processing, and responsive design capabilities.

Future-Proofing Your Business with MERN Stack Talent

Hiring MERN stack developers in New York isn’t just about immediate development needs. It’s about building a foundation for continuous innovation. With digital transformation accelerating, having a full-stack team skilled in modern technologies ensures:

Faster time to market

Seamless integration with cloud and AI tools

Strong data architecture for analytics

Agile, scalable solutions ready for future business needs

Final Thoughts

To stay competitive, businesses need technology partners who understand not just code but also strategy. When you hire MERN stack developers in New York, you gain access to world-class development expertise coupled with local market insight.

Whether you're launching a new product, modernizing legacy systems, or scaling your operations, MERN developers bring the right mix of speed, agility, and innovation to make it happen.

See more service:

Offshore Development Cost Calculator

Hire MERN Stack Developers in New York

Hire ReactJS Developers in New York

Hire Full Stack Developers in New York

#MERN stack developers #New York City #web applications #MERN stack #MongoDB #Express.js #React #Node.js #AquSag Technologies #full stack developer skills #software development

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magicalqueennightmare · 1 month ago

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Two Soldiers?

Bucky Barnes x Reader x John Walker

You want them, they want you. You all needed a push

Blame @desimarie12

Warnings: Sexual happenings with 3 people in the mix

You weren’t an idiot. You’d known for a while that you’d somehow managed to catch the eye of not one but two super soldiers. It started with Bucky. You worked closely with Sam, because way back when Steve and Nat were on the run they’d gone to him and he’d pulled you in. After the blip you came back to ruins, Steve was gone and Nat was dead.

Sam knew you had no family left so he kind of helped to keep an eye on you while you, like him and so many others, started to rebuild your life. You stayed in New York, close to Bucky while Sam went home to Louisiana. That was also around the time he gave up the shield and the good ol United States government decided they wanted to place someone as Captain America.

You didn’t react quite as severely as Bucky and Sam did to John Walker. You researched the man. He was qualified. He had the military background and by far the training to carry that mantle.

The day you first met him, you were standing behind Sam and Bucky after the fight against the Flag Smashers. He’d eyed you “Aren’t you Lilith?” you smirked “That particular moniker is thanks to Tony Stark but yeah” he extended a hand and despite you feeling both Bucky and Sam tense you placed yours in his as he introduced himself “John Walker ma’am” you nodded “I know who you are, government snatches that shield out of a museum I try to see whose hands it’s going into” “And what do you think?” he asked, you shook your head “I’ve yet to form an opinion one way or another about you John Walker”

The following weeks were hell, from the constant globe hopping with Zemo of all people to fighting the Doja Milaje to having a front row seat and being helpless to do anything when Lemar, John’s friend and partner was killed. You tried to show sympathy for him but where did the line get drawn? Where do you stop the line between justice and vengeance? That was why you’d walked away from your team before, why Clint had been forced to chase you down when the accords were slapped onto the table.

When it was all said and done, the mantle of Captain America was stripped from John, along with any title he’d earned in the military. You hadn’t agreed with that decision. No he didn’t deserve the mantle of Cap but he’d earned those medals and his retirement.

Bucky ended up going into politics, you worked with Sam and Joaquin when needed and besides that everyone was kind of in the wind for the most part. Or you were until a few years passed and you found yourself getting a text from Bucky. It had coordinates and three words Get here NOW

Those coordinates? When you got there? You were met with Bucky and he had Yelena Belova, Ava Starr, Alexei Shostakiv and god help you John Walker tied up. Apparently there was something big coming and Bucky needed your help wrangling the rag tag team he’d pulled together. Your eyes held John’s as his head barely dipped as a form of greeting “Lilith” “Walker” you replied then looked back at Bucky “Fuck it, I’m in”

Now? You were on the damn team. Thunderbolts, the new avengers…whatever the hell you were. All of you were now living in the watchtower (formerly the avengers tower so you knew your way around it fairly well even after renovations) and worked as a team.

The only issue? You had developed some sort of feelings for both John and Bucky. Bucky, you’d formed a bond with back when Steve would send you to Wakanda to check on his healing then once both of you were leaving just a block or two away from each other you’d grown close. Too many nights where neither of you could find sleep if you weren’t together.

As for John? He’d crept up on you. His wife had divorced him after everything and taken his son. The man had hit rock bottom and was trying to be better and god help you despite knowing how horrible he’d been, seeing how arrogant he still was at times…you found yourself falling for him too.

“You know they both want you right?” Yelena pointed out as you and her were training one day. It took you off guard enough she flipped you across the gym, your back slamming into the mat hard enough your body bounced. “Christ Belova, give a woman a warning!”

She laughed, hopping up and walked over to offer you her hand “Sorry but it’s true. They both follow you like whipped puppies. They get mad when the other gets assigned to a mission with you and why do you think Ava and I always sit on either side of you? It’s so you don’t have to get stuck between them. You would overheat” you felt your face warm “They’re super soldiers Yelena. Not collector items. I can’t just put them both on the shelf above my bed”

She raised an eyebrow “Why? You want to just take them down when you’re wanting to play with them?” you busted out laughing “LENA!” and she shrugged “Just… if I show you, will you believe me then?” you shrugged “Sure” she grabbed your hand “Ok, come on”

She didn’t let you go until the two of you were in the kitchen where Bucky was currently pulling his arm out of the dishwasher. That damn tank top he was wearing had you drooling the moment you stepped in. “Good morning” she greeted him and he raised an eyebrow, looking at you “Is she planning to kill me?” you sighed “Probably not?” he laughed “Well enough. Good morning Yelena. What do you want?” “Can Lilith paint your nails?” your eyes widened “What?”

Bucky was already looking at you, a smirk on his face “Well I don’t know if any paint would stick to my left arm but you’re welcome to the right” she grinned at you and nodded “I’m going to grab Bob and Ava. I’ll meet you two in the tv room”

Bucky couldn’t believe how fast he agreed to letting you paint his nails but the smile on your face when he agreed was worth anything. Once Yelena disappeared from the room you whispered softly “You don’t have to” and he took a step towards you, raising his left hand to gently brush the few strands that had fallen free from your braid back from your face “I want to doll. If you want to” you nodded and took his hand “Ok then”

You drug him behind you into the tv room and as the two of you made it in, Yelena laughed from where she was sitting, painting Ava’s toenails “Now Bucky. You do know that she can’t paint other people’s nails right?”

He looked from her to you “What do you mean?” Ava laughed “She’s good at painting her nails but when she painted mine for that last gala Valentina made us attend, she had to sit in my lap to do so. It made it the same angle as her own nails” you felt your face warm because you were just going to try to paint Bucky’s normally.

He grinned at you “I’m still up for it” and walked over to the couch. He sat down and stretched his legs out, patting one thick thigh “Come on sweetheart” you cut your eyes at Ava and Yelena, both of them shooting you smirks while Bob tried to hide his laughter.

You grabbed the black polish and walked over. You turned to crawl into Bucky’s lap with your back to him, straddling him as you got comfortable. “Good?” you asked as his left arm slipped around your waist “Perfect” you felt your stomach jump, core throbbing at how close he was but your friends were at your feet and you were doing something as innocent as painting his nails, right?

John had no idea what the hell Yelena wanted when she texted him Come to the tv room who even called it the tv room? He rolled his eyes, walking through the long hallways. He wasn’t sure where you were. You’d been training with her earlier in the day or that was what the schedule was.

When he got to the doorway of the entertainment room however he froze. Yelena, Ava and Bob were sitting on cushions in a corner. He wasn’t sure what they were doing or what was playing on the tv. His attention was solely on the fact that you were sitting in Bucky’s lap. The other man had his left arm wrapped around your waist as you painted the nails on his right hand black. You were wearing those damn biker shorts you liked to train in, had thrown a -shirt on over your sports bra but that was it. Just the tip of your tongue slipped between your teeth as you concentrated on the task at hand and as for Bucky? The smug bastard looked up the moment he heard John’s footsteps. A smirk playing at his lips before he finally spoke “Hey John”

Your eyes flew up at Bucky’s words. John was standing in the doorway, staring at you. His hands were balled up in fists at his side, chest heaving slightly. Those damn grey sweatpants he wore hid little to the imagination and the white t-shirt hugged him beautifully. “Hey” you greeted and he smiled “Hey Honey, what ya doing?” you gripped Bucky’s hand and held it up to show off your handy work “Making Bucky’s right nails match the left” Bucky laughed lightly at your joke, his breath teasing your neck as he said “Looks almost as pretty as you” and you felt your heart flip.

John cleared his throat and held up his hands “Well I got ten nails you can paint. Wanna have a go?” you grinned brightly “You, John Walker are gonna walk around with painted nails?” he shrugged “If you’re the one painting them, gladly” you turned to look at Bucky and he was glaring at John but his face quickly softened when he looked at you “Ok sweetheart, let me get up” you crawled out of his lap and saw something pass between him and John as John walked over and sat on the couch where Bucky had been. You turned towards him, leaning down to pick up your bag of polish “I have black like I did Bucky’s or different colors”

His larger hand covered yours, thumb teasing across your knuckle as his eyes met yours. “I like the shade of green you’re wearing darlin” you smiled, face warming “You wanna match me?” he nodded “If that’s ok with you” you laughed “Oh course” and grabbed the shade before motioning to him to lean back so you could sit on his lap like you’d been on Bucky’s.

Once you were straddling John you grabbed his left hand first and started painting his nails. You were focused on the task at hand and fighting the urge to lean into his warm body, press closer to him. You missed the looks him and Bucky were passing or the plan Ava and Yelena was forming.

“I tell you, she was over the moon daddy” Yelena was talking to Alexei in the kitchen. The two of them were getting coffee right next to where John was cooking breakfast. She’d roped Alexei into her idea and he’d been more than happy to “Help Lil get her soldiers”

John tried to act as if he wasn’t listening but he was a little curious. Alexei, ever the dramatic one, gasped “Do you think she will be moving out of the tower? I will miss her! Lilith is like another daughter to me” John’s mouth moved without his brain being able to catch up “How’s that?” Yelena shot her father a look, knowing they had this one. “She’s been seeing two guys. They treat her well and it seems like it’s getting serious”

“She’s seeing two guys?” he asked and Yelena nodded, testing the waters “Why, are you judging her?” John shook his head quickly “No! Of course not, just..I never knew she had one boyfriend. They’re ok with each other?” he was curious and jealous and well pissed. “Of course. They both love her, they’ve actually learned to care for each other because of her” Yelena told him and he nodded slowly “If she’s happy that’s what matters” he tried to act like he wasn’t breaking at the seams but the spatula snapping in half told otherwise. “Shit” he muttered, eyeing it “Um, Alexei..finish the eggs?” he asked and Alexei nodded “Ok”

“Bob, you don’t think anyone will judge her for it do you?” Ava asked Bob, the two of them purposely having this conversation in front of Bucky. Her and Bob were both on treadmills while Bucky was using one of the reinforced punching bags. “Judge her for loving two people? Why?” Bob asked and Bucky grabbed the bag with his left hand. “Who are we gossipping about?”

Ava smirked at Bob before saying “Lilith, she’s got two boyfriends” Bucky raised an eyebrow, he didn’t know you were dating. He’d been flirting his ass off with you..hell so had Walker but he didn’t know two other someones already had you. “Oh yeah?” he asked and Bob nodded “If something doesn’t change she may leave the team for them” “That right?” Bucky muttered more to himself than anything. Like hell. He needed to talk to Walker, now.

John and Bucky smacked into each other in the hallway “Did you know she had boyfriends?” “Those bastards are trying to get her to leave the team” they spoke over each other. Bucky took a deep breath “I care about her outside of wanting to fuck her. Do you?” John nodded “Of course, she’s the only person who gives a damn about me. She’s amazing”

Bucky nodded, staring John down “Do you think you’re gonna change your mind about her anytime soon? I haven’t in over six years” John shook his head “I haven’t felt like this about anyone in a long time”

“If we let her know she’s got other options besides whatever two assholes are trying to make her walk away from this team, do you think she’ll stay?” Bucky offered, crossing his arms. John unconsciously mimicked his posture “What are you saying Barnes? Loud and clear”

“You want her, I want her. If she’s already got two fellas she’s not opposed to it. Let's offer her the better option” Bucky laid it out and John nodded slowly “Can we do this without killing each other?” Bucky shrugged “Do you want to think about her in someone else’s arms or be in the same bed with her while she’s in mine and her still be touching you?” that sold it for John. He held his hand out and Bucky shook it “Let’s go get her”

You were in your room, laid backwards across your bed when the sound of two fists pounding on your door hard enough the frame vibrated made you jump. You stormed across the room, snatching it open to see both John and Bucky standing there “What the hell? I nearly grabbed a damn gun! You two could have broke my door hitting it at the same time”

They gave no explanation, they both just pushed into your room. John closed the door behind them. You took a step back, crossing your arms over your chest and were suddenly acutely aware of the fact that you weren’t wearing a lot. You had on a tight camisole that held your breasts in place and a pair of boxers, that was it.

Their eyes flickered across your body and your face warmed. “Speak, one of you” you ordered and Bucky smirked “I like when you’re bossy, even if you’re so damn short we nearly have to kneel to be face to face with you” you gasped “What the fuck Barnes?” John laughed “Well he has a point, not that either of us would downright mind being on our knees for you” your head whipped towards John fast enough you damn near ended up with whiplash “Excuse me Walker?”

They both took a step forward, Bucky stepping wide while John walked straight towards you. You realized half a second too late they were boxing you in. You looked between both of them when they were close enough you could feel the heat pouring off their bodies “What the fuck are you two doing?” Bucky’s hand came up, flesh fingers lightly tracing across your exposed shoulders “Are you leaving?” you swallowed hard “What?”

John’s fingers were next and that asshole dipped down to let his digits tease across the soft flesh of your thighs “Answer Bucky baby. Are you leaving us to be with those assholes?” you looked from one man to the other “What assholes? What is going on?”

Bucky’s hand moved to your chin, tilting your head to look at him “Ava said your boyfriends were getting you to leave the team” John moved in, breath hot on your neck where Bucky had exposed the skin “Yelena said you were so in love but yet your heart is pounding like you’re about to bolt”

“Even if I was, why would you two be here?” you asked quietly, happy when your voice came out solid. “To give you a better option” John breathed into your flesh, lips finally meeting skin and you would have buckled then and there but Bucky chose that moment for his lips to find yours, tongue slipping into your mouth.

One of your hands slipped down to grasp John’s while the other went to Bucky’s hip. You didn’t know if you should pull them closer or push them away or what. What the fuck did Ava and Yelena do?

As if they’d planned it, Bucky broke from your lips to move down to your neck while John tilted your head to claim your lips. You gasped into his mouth when Bucky’s teeth grazed your skin and he used that opening to slip his tongue into your mouth. You felt dizzy and hot like everything was moving too fast yet too slow at the same time.

You got enough sense about you to snatch away from them both, chest heaving as you stared down the two blue eyed super soldiers who’d just been clinging to you like a life vest. “What the hell is going on?” “You want us, we want you” Bucky answered and John nodded “Give in one time honey. I promise when we’re through you ain't gonna want no one else”

You gasped, looking from one of them to the other. Both were dressed similarly, sweatpants and those damn tight shirts they wore around that look like they were burst at the seams. The damn sweatpants gave evidence to the fact that both of them wanted you. The slick pooling down your thighs gave proof to how much you wanted them. “And me be branded a whore for fucking both of you? Ms cant pick?” you threw at them.

“We ain’t trying to make you pick. We’ll tell the damn press we begged you to have both of us” John told you and Bucky nodded “Want us to call the press conference in the damn morning?” you laughed “You’re getting ahead of yourselves. Super soldiers or not, the dick can’t be that good” they both laughed and that was alarming. The men who’d been at each other’s throats was suddenly getting along on the fact of fucking you. “Oh honey, I don’t know about Bucky but I know what I’m doing” John challenged.

Bucky cut his eyes at him “There’s a reason quite a few women in Wakanda missed me asshole” you felt your thighs clench at them arguing and both of their attention lurched back to you. “What do you say?” John asked and you swallowed “I don’t know..”

Bucky slipped his shirt over his head, tossing it so John did the same and fuck it all you down right whimpered. Here you were being offered the two sexiest men you’d ever seen on a fucking silver platter. “I don’t know if I can please you both” you whispered and John reached to pull you between them, your hands against his chest while Bucky’s chest was against your back “Baby, I seriously doubt anything you do would disappoint us”

You looked up at John then back at Bucky. “Ok” “Ok?” Bucky asked and you nodded “Ok”

John’s lips found yours, hungry and devouring as Bucky’s lips descended on your neck, teeth marking his presence. “Leave room for me to mark her Barnes” John growled between kisses. You laughed “Easy boys, my body isn’t a battlefield. You’ll hurt me”

“Never” “Never” they both promised. You turned to press a kiss to Bucky’s lips before going down on your knees in front of both men. You looked up at them and they were both looking at you like you were a goddess incarnate. You rubbed both of their hardened cocks through the front of their pants “Take these off for me?”

They quickly complied, no shame in being nude in front of the other one. You licked your licks at the sight of their cocks. Both were fucking beautiful, thick and long. You cut your eyes up at them, wrapping your hand around John’s as you kissed the tips of Bucky’s. They both let out a low groan. You slid your mouth down Bucky’s length and he moaned low, just loud enough the three of you could hear. You started to move your hand on John’s in rhythm with your tongue on Bucky’s.

After a moment you switched, moving your hand to Bucky’s cock as sliding your mouth down around John’s. When his cock hit the back of your throat, causing you to gag slightly he groaned “Fuck honey, you’re perfect” and Bucky grunted out “Yeah she is” in agreement.

You found a pace that had both of them praising you, light curses falling from their lips. You knew they were close but you kept at it, you felt both of them tense right before John came, his cum shooting down your throat in hot spurts as Bucky’s cum covered your hand.

They were both nothing short of beautiful, completely nude, cheeks and chest a light pink, their chests heaving slightly as you stared up at them. You licked Bucky’s cum off your hand and they both groaned. “Do we really get to keep her?” John asked Bucky who laughed “Fuck, I hope so”

Their hands came down to pull you to your feet, lips finding yours as they both pressed kisses to your lips and neck. “You’re wearing too much” John muttered and Bucky nodded in agreement “Way too much”

You didn’t have time to take your clothes off. One of John’s hands fisted in your top while one of Bucky’s fisted in your boxers. One flex from the soldiers and your clothing was rags on the floor. “I liked those” you pouted and Bucky laughed “We’ll buy you more”

The next thing you knew your back was on the bed as their mouths devoured your body. You’d never even seen them work as well together in the field as they were working together to take you apart. They started at your neck, mouths teasing with tongue and teeth then working down. When each of them rolled a nipple into their mouths, your back arched off the bed, a loud moan that was somewhere between John and James leaving your lips.

They continued their path downwards and you knew your body would be littered with their marks for days after this encounter. When they got to your waist they eyed each other and Bucky nodded to John. John grinned, face lowering to your core. You felt the first flick of his tongue and your head fell back against the pillows, fingers tangling in his hair “Fuck John, that feels good”

Bucky, not one to be left out, nudged John slightly and John shifted enough that two of Bucky’s fingers could find their way into you along with John’s tongue. It was a maddening rush to be completely at the mercy of those men that could crush you if they wanted and yet they were controlling even their most basic instincts to fight each other so they could please you.

It wasn’t long and you could feel that fire growing in the pit of your stomach. Bucky caught your eye and nodded “Let it go doll, we got ya” you moaned, long and broken as your orgasm slammed into you. You felt your release soak Bucky’s hand, John’s face and the bed underneath the three of you.

Bucky slowly pulled his fingers out of you, slipping them into his mouth to suck them clean and he groaned “Fuck she tastes good” John left a last lingering kiss against your clit before pulling back, a low laugh leaving him “I know”

You whined lightly “Can I fuck one of you now?” they both laughed, pressing kisses to your thigh “Yeah baby” John nudged Bucky “I got to feel her mouth and taste her first. You can fuck her first” you eyed John “Don’t go anywhere, I’m fucking you too before we’re done” he grinned “Didn’t plan on it”

He moved up the bed and turned you so you were cradled against his chest, legs spread wide for Bucky “Gotta make sure he don’t hurt you when he pushes you into the positions he wants you in” he breathed into your ear, pressing kisses to your neck.

Bucky crawled up the bed, nudging his hips between yours “Fuck, Walker! Condoms!” you laughed “I have an IUD boys. I’m covered” Bucky grinned “Even better” you could feel the head of his cock teasing at your entrance but he still looked to you for the ok. You nodded and he caught your lips in a soft kiss as he pushed in, a moan leaving you both at the feeling of him stretching you.

“How she feel Barnes?” John asked and Bucky grunted “Fucking amazing” you gasped when Bucky shifted his hips. “You can fuck me Bucky, I can take it” He used one hand to push the hair back from your face “Oh I know you can beautiful”

John moved to be leaning against the headboard, you back against his chest and your legs hooked over his. Giving Bucky the perfect position without putting too much pressure on your hips.

“Damn you two can work well in a team after all” you teased and felt John’s fingers dig into your hips “Don’t tease us gorgeous” “We can tear you apart” Bucky reminded. You laughed “But you won’t” Bucky’s lips crashed onto yours as he found a pace that had you gasping, nails digging into his shoulders as he worked you closer and closer to that edge.

You could feel your orgasm building and when Bucky slipped a hand between your bodies, fingers finding your clit, you came hard, clenching around him. He bit down on your shoulder as his hips snapped into yours a few more times before you felt him find his release, hot cum filling you. He damn near collapsed on you, pressing kisses everywhere he could reach before rolling off the side.

You were trying to get your breathing back to normal as you looked back at John “Want me to clean up first or..” you didn’t get the chance before he was spinning you around to straddle him. “Or this” you laughed, letting him lift you up to drag your pussy down onto his cock. The stretch still burnt even after Bucky. John’s head fell over onto your chest for just a second once he was buried in you “Damn you feel amazing” “Told you” Bucky laughed.

You shook your head, catching John’s lips in a kiss that was messy and hungry as he started to lift your hips. He would drag you up his length then slam you back down. You were a moaning mess on top of him and he wasn’t much better under you. One of your hands fisted in his hair, “So damn pretty, fuck John. Fuck” you babbled and he slipped one hand between you, teasing at your clit. You shook around him as you came, body going limp. He kept thrusting up into you until he brought you back down flush with his hips and you felt when he found his release, cum spurting deep inside of you.

You fell over against his chest, feeling his hands and Bucky’s on your back. “So, that was fun” you laughed.

The three of you had cleaned up and you were laying half on Bucky and half on John as you talked. “So, are you gonna break up with them for us?” John asked and you laughed lightly “Can I confess something?” Bucky groaned “You’re married?” you made a fake gagging sound “Ew no, I never had boyfriends. I’m fairly certain that was Yelena and Ava pushing whatever this is”

John and Bucky both raised up to look at each other “Those little..” you started laughing “Are you two mad?” they looked back down at you then back at each other “Not too much, you Walker?” “Not really”

#john walker smut #bucky barnes smut #john walker x reader x bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader x john walker #john walker x reader #john walker x you #john walker x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fanfic

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mrs-stans · 10 months ago

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Sebastian Stan Tells All: Becoming Donald Trump, Gaining 15 Pounds and Starring in 2024’s Most Controversial Movie

By Daniel D'Addario

Sebastian Stan Variety Cover Story

It started with the most famous voice on the planet, the one that just won’t shut up.

Sebastian Stan, in real life, sounds very little like Donald Trump, whom he’s playing in the new film “The Apprentice.” Sure, they share a tristate accent — Stan has lived in the city for years and attended Rutgers University before launching his career — but he speaks with none of Trump’s emphasis on his own greatness. Trump dwells, Stan skitters. Trump attempts to draw topics together over lengthy stem-winders (what he recently called “the weave”), while Stan has a certain unwillingness to be pinned down, a desire to keep moving. It takes some coaxing to bring Stan, a man with the upright bearing and square jaw of a matinee idol, to speak about his own process — how hard he worked to conjure a sense Trump, and how he sought to bring out new insights about America’s most scrutinized politician.

“I think he’s a lot smarter than people want to say about him,” Stan says, “because he repeats things consistently, and he’s given you a brand.” Stan would know: He watched videos of Trump on a loop while preparing for “The Apprentice.” In the film, out on Oct. 11, Stan plays Trump as he moves from insecure, aspiring real estate developer to still insecure but established member of the New York celebrity firmament.

We’re sitting over coffee in Manhattan. Stan is dressed down in a black chore coat and black tee, yet he’s anything but a casual conversation partner. He rarely breaks eye contact, doing so only on the occasions when he has something he wants to show me on his iPhone (cracked screen, no case). In this instance, it’s folders of photos and videos labeled “DT” and “DT PHYSICALITY.”

“I had 130 videos on his physicality on my phone,” Stan says. “And 562 videos that I had pulled with pictures from different time periods — from the ’70s all the way to today — so I could pull out his speech patterns and try to improvise like him.” Stan, deep in character, would ad-lib entire scenes at director Ali Abbasi’s urging, drawing on the details he’d learned from watching Trump and reading interviews to understand precisely how to react in each moment.

“Ali could come in on the second take and say, ‘Why don’t you talk a little bit about the taxes and how you don’t want to pay?’ So I had to know what charities they were going to in 1983. Every night I would go home and try not only to prepare for the day that was coming, but also to prepare for where Ali was going to take this.”

Looking at Stan’s phone, among the endless pictures of Trump, I glimpse thumbnails of Stan’s own face perched in a Trumpian pout and videos of the actor’s preparation just aching to be clicked — or to be stored in the Trump Presidential Library when this is all over in a few months, or in 2029, or beyond.

“I started to realize that I needed to start speaking with my lips in a different way,” Stan says. “A lot of that came from the consonants. If I’m talking, I’m moving forward.” On film, Stan shapes his mouth like he can’t wait to get the plosives out, puckering without quite tipping into parody. “The consonants naturally forced your lips forward.”

“If he did 10% more of what he did, it would become ‘Saturday Night Live,’” Abbasi says. “If he did 10% less, then he’s not conjuring that person. But here’s the thing about Sebastian: He’s very inspired by reality, by research. And that’s also the way I work; if you want to go to strange places, you need to get your baseline reality covered very well.”

A little later, Stan passes me the phone again to show me a selfie of him posing shirtless and revealing two sagging pecs and a bit of a gut. He’s pouting into a mirror. If his expression looks exaggerated, consider that he was in Marvel-movie shape before stepping into the role of the former president; the body transformation happened rapidly and jarringly. Trump’s size is a part of the film’s plot — as Trump’s sense of self inflates, so does he. In a rush to meet the shooting deadline for “The Apprentice,” Abbasi asked Stan, “How much weight can you gain?”

“You’d be surprised,” Stan tells me. “You can gain a lot of weight in two months.” (Fifteen pounds, to be exact.)

Now he’s back in fighting form, but the character has stayed with him. After years of playing second-fiddle agents of chaos — goofball husbands to Margot Robbie’s and Lily James’ characters in “I, Tonya” and Hulu’s “Pam & Tommy,” surly frenemy to Chris Evans’ Captain America in the Marvel franchise — Stan plunged into the id of the man whose appetites have reshaped our world. He had to have a polished enough sense of Trump that he could improvise in character, and enough respect for him to play him as a human being, not a monster.

It’s one of two transformations this year for Stan — and one that might give a talented actor that most elusive thing: a brand of his own. He’s long been adjacent enough to star power that he could feel its glow, but he hasn’t been the marquee performer. While his co-stars have found themselves defined by the projects he’s been in — from “Captain America” and “I, Tonya” back to his start on “Gossip Girl” — he’s spent more than a decade in the public eye while evading being defined at all.

This fall promises to be the season that changes all that: Stan is pulling double duty with “The Apprentice” and “A Different Man” (in theaters Sept. 20), in which he plays a man afflicted with a disfiguring tumor disorder who — even when presented with a fantastical treatment that makes him look like, well, Sebastian Stan — can’t be cured of ailments of the soul. For “A Different Man,” Stan won the top acting prize at the Berlin Film Festival; for “The Apprentice,” the sky’s the limit, if it can manage to get seen. (More on that later.)

One reason Stan has largely evaded being defined is that he’s never the same twice, often willing to get loopy or go dark in pursuit of his characters’ truths. That’s all the more true this year: In “The Apprentice,” he’s under the carapace of Trumpiness; in “A Different Man,” his face is hidden behind extensive prosthetics.

“In my book, if you’re the good-looking, sensitive guy 20 movies in a row, that’s not a star for me,” says Abbasi, who compares Stan to Marlon Brando — an actor eager to play against his looks. “You’re just one of the many in the factory of the Ken dolls.”

This fall represents Stan’s chance to break out of the toy store once and for all. His Winter Soldier brought a jolt of evil into Captain America’s world, and his Jeff Gillooly was the devil sitting on Tonya Harding’s shoulder. Now Stan is at the center of the frame, playing one of the most divisive characters imaginable. So he’s showing us where he can go. The spotlight is his, and so is the risk that comes with it.

Why take such a risk?

The script for “The Apprentice,” which Stan first received in 2019, but which took years to come together, made him consider the American dream, the one that Trump achieved and is redefining.

Stan emigrated with his mother, a pianist, from communist Romania as a child. “I was raised always aware of the American dream: America being the land of opportunity, where dreams come true, where you can make something of yourself.” He pushes the wings of his hair back to frame his face, a gold signet ring glinting in the late-summer sunlight, and, briefly, I can hear a hint of Trump’s directness of approach. “You can become whoever you want, if you just have a good idea.” Stan’s good idea has been to play the lead in movies while dodging the formulaic identity of a leading man, and this year will prove just how far he can take it.

“The Apprentice” seemed like it would never come together before suddenly it did. This time last year, Stan was sure it was dead in the water, and he was OK with that. “If this movie is not happening, it’s because it’s not meant to happen,” he recalls thinking. “It will not be because I’m too scared and walk away.”

Called in on short notice and filming from November 2023 to January of this year (ahead of a May premiere in Cannes), Stan lent heft and attitude to a character arc that takes Trump from local real estate developer in the 1970s to national celebrity in the 1980s. He learns the rough-and-tumble game of power from the ruthless and hedonistic political fixer Roy Cohn (Jeremy Strong), eventually cutting the closeted Cohn loose as he dies of AIDS and alienating his wife Ivana (Maria Bakalova) in the process. (In a shocking scene, Donald sexually assaults Ivana in their Trump Tower apartment.) For all its edginess, the film is about Trump’s personality — and the way it calcified into a persona — rather than his present-day politics. (Despite its title, it’s set well before the 2004 launch of the reality show that finally made Trump the superstar he longed to be.)

And despite the fact that Trump has kept America rapt since he announced his run for president in 2015, Hollywood has been terrified of “The Apprentice.” The film didn’t sell for months after Cannes, an unusual result for a major English-language competition film, partly because Trump’s legal team sent a cease-and-desist letter attempting to block the film’s release in the U.S. while the fest was still ongoing. When it finally sold, it was to Briarcliff Entertainment, a distributor so small that the production has launched a Kickstarter campaign to raise money so that it will be able to stay in theaters.

Yes, Hollywood may vote blue, but it’s not the same town that released “Fahrenheit 9/11” or even “W.,” let alone a film that depicts the once (and possibly future) president raping his wife. (The filmmakers stand behind that story. “The script is 100% backed by my own interviews and historical research,” says Gabriel Sherman, the screenwriter and a journalist who covers Trump and the American conservative movement. “And it’s important to note that it is not a documentary. It’s a work of fiction that’s inspired by history.”) Entertainment corporations from Netflix to Disney would be severely inconvenienced if the next president came into office with a grudge against them.

“I am quite shocked, to be honest,” Abbasi says. “This is not a political piece. It’s not a hit piece; it’s not a hatchet job; it’s not propaganda. The fact that it’s been so challenging is shocking.” Abbasi, born in Iran, was condemned by his government over his last film, “Holy Spider,” and cannot safely return. He sees a parallel in the response to “The Apprentice.” “OK, that’s Iran — that is unfortunately expected. But I wasn’t expecting this.”

“Everything with this film has been one day at a time,” Stan says. The actor chalks up the film’s divisiveness to a siloed online environment. “There are a lot of people who love reading the [film’s] Wikipedia page and throwing out their opinions,” he says, an edge entering his voice. “But they don’t actually know what they’re talking about. That’s a popular sport now online, apparently.”

Unprompted, Stan brings up the idea that Trump is so widely known that some might think a biographical film about him serves no purpose. “When someone says, ‘Why do we need this movie? We know all this,’ I’ll say, ‘Maybe you do, but you haven’t experienced it. The experience of those two hours is visceral. It’s something you can hopefully feel — if you still have feelings.’”

After graduating from Rutgers in 2005, Stan found his first substantial role on “Gossip Girl,” playing troubled rich kid Carter Baizen. Like teen soaps since time immemorial, “Gossip Girl” was a star-making machine. “It was the first time I was in serious love with somebody,” he says. (He dated the series’ star, Leighton Meester, from 2008 to 2010.) He feels nostalgic for that moment: “Walking around the city, seeing these same buildings and streets — life seemed simpler.”

Stan followed his “Gossip Girl” gig with roles on the 2009 NBC drama “Kings,” playing a devious gay prince in an alternate-reality modern world governed by a monarchy, and the 2012 USA miniseries “Political Animals,” playing a black-sheep prince (and once again a gay man) of a different sort — the son of a philandering former president and an ambitious former first lady.

When I ask him what lane he envisioned himself in as a young actor, he shrugs off the question. “I grew up with a single mom, and I didn’t have a lot of male role models. I was always trying to figure out what I wanted to be. And at some point, I was like, I could just be a bunch of things.”

Which might seem challenging when one is booked to play the same character, Bucky Barnes, in Marvel movie after Marvel movie. Bucky’s adventures have been wide-ranging — he’s been brainwashed and turned evil and then brought back to the home team again, all since his debut in 2011’s “Captain America: The First Avenger.” Next year, he’ll anchor the summer movie “Thunderbolts,” as the leader of a squad of quirky heroes played by, among others, Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Florence Pugh. It’s easy to wonder if this has come to feel like a cage of sorts.

Not so, says Stan. His new Marvel film “was kind of like ‘One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest’ — a guy coming into this group that was chaotic and degenerate, and somehow finding a way to unite them.”

Lately, knives have been out for Marvel movies as some have disappointed at the box office, and “Thunderbolts,” which endured strike delays and last-minute cast changes, has been under scrutiny.

“It’s become really convenient to pick on [Marvel films],” Stan says. “And that’s fine. Everyone’s got an opinion. But they’re a big part of what contributes to this business and allows us to have smaller movies as well. This is an artery traveling through the system of this entire machinery that’s Hollywood. It feeds in so many more ways than people acknowledge.” He adds, “Sometimes I get protective of it because the intention is really fucking good. It’s just fucking hard to make a good movie over and over again.”

Which may account for an eagerness to try something new. “In the last couple of years,” he says, “I’ve gotten much more aggressive about pursuing things that I want, and I’m constantly looking for different ways of challenging myself.”

The challenge continued throughout the shoot of “The Apprentice,” as Stan pushed the material. “One of the most creatively rewarding parts of the process was how open Sebastian was to giving notes on the script but also wanting to go beyond the script,” says Sherman, the screenwriter. “If he was interested in a certain aspect of a scene, he was like, Can you find me a quote?” he recalls.

Building a dynamic through improvised scenes, Stan and Strong stayed in character throughout the “Apprentice” shoot. “I was doing an Ibsen play on Broadway,” says Strong, who won a Tony in June for his performance in “An Enemy of the People,” “and he came backstage afterwards. And it was like — I’d never really met Sebastian, and I don’t think he’d ever met me. So it was nice to meet him.”

Before the pair began acting together, they didn’t rehearse much — “I’m not a fan of rehearsals,” Strong says. “I think actors are best left in their cocoon, doing their work, and then trusted to walk on set and be ready.” The two didn’t touch the script together until cameras went up — though they spent a preproduction day, Strong says, playing games in character as Donald and Roy.

After filming, both have kept memories of the hold their characters had on them. They shared a flight back from Telluride — a famously bumpy trip out of the mountains. “He’s a nervous flyer, and I’m a nervous flyer,” Stan says. Both marveled at the fact that they’d contained their nerves on the first day of shooting “The Apprentice,” when their characters traveled together via helicopter. “We both go, ‘Yeah — but there was a camera.’”

Stan’s aggressive approach to research came in handy on “A Different Man,” which shot before “The Apprentice.” His character’s disorder, neurofibromatosis, is caused by a genetic mutation and presents as benign tumors growing in the nervous system. After being healed, he feels a growing envy for a fellow sufferer who seems unbothered by his disability.

Stan’s co-star, Adam Pearson, was diagnosed with neurofibromatosis in early childhood. Stan found the experience challenging to render faithfully. “I said many times, I can do all the research in the world, but am I ever going to come close to this?” Stan says. ��How am I going to ever do this justice?”

Plus, he had precious little time to prepare: “He was fully on board, and the film was being made weeks later,” director Aaron Schimberg says. “Zero to 60 in a matter of weeks.”

The actor grappled for something to hold on to, and Pearson sug gested he refer to his own experience of fame. “Adam said to me, ‘You know what it’s like to be public property,’” Stan says.

Pearson recalls describing the experience to Stan this way: “While you don’t understand the invasiveness and the staring and the pointing that I’ve grown up with, you do know what it’s like to have the world think you owe them something.”

That sense of alienation becomes universal through the film’s storytelling: “A Different Man” takes its premise as the jumping-off point for a deep and often mordant investigation of who we all are underneath the skin.

The film was shot in 22 days in a New York City heat wave, and there was, Schimberg says, “no room for error. I would get four or five takes, however many I could squeeze out, but there’s no coverage.”

Through it all, Stan’s performance is utterly poised — Schimberg and Stan discussed Buster Keaton as a reference for his ability to be “completely stone-faced” amid chaos, the director says. And the days were particularly long because Oscar-nominated prosthetics artist Michael Marino was only able to apply Stan’s makeup in the early morning, before going to his job on the set of “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.”

“Even though I wasn’t shooting until 11 a.m., I would go at like 5 in the morning to his studio, or his apartment,” Stan recalls. The hidden advantage was that Stan had hours to kill while made up like his character, the kind of person the world looks past. “I wanted to walk around the city and see what happened,” Stan says. “On Broadway, one of the busiest streets in New York, no one’s looking at me. It’s as if I’m not even there.” The other reaction was worse: “Somebody would immediately stop and very blatantly hit their friend, point, take a picture.”

It was a study in empathy that flowed into the character. Stan had spoken to Pearson’s mother, who watched her son develop neurofibromatosis before growing into a disability advocate and, eventually, an actor. “She said to me, ‘All I ever wanted was for someone to walk in his shoes for a day,’” Stan recalls. “And I guess that was the closest I had ever come.”

“The Apprentice” forced Stan, and forces the viewer, to do the same with a figure that some 50% of the electorate would sooner forget entirely. And that lends the film its controversy. Those on the right, presupposing that the movie is an anti-Trump document, have railed against it. In a statement provided to Variety, a Trump campaign spokesman said, “This ‘film’ is pure malicious defamation, should never see the light of day and doesn’t even deserve a place in the straight-to-DVD section of a bargain bin at a soon-to-be-closed discount movie store, it belongs in a dumpster fire.” The campaign threatened a lawsuit, though none has materialized.

Asked about the assault scene, Stan notes that Ivana had made the claim in a deposition, but later walked it back. “Is it closer to the truth, what she had said directly in the deposition or something that she retracted?” he asks. “They went with the first part.”

The movie depicts, too, Ivana’s carrying on with her marriage after the violation, which may be still more devastating. “How do you overcome something like this?” asks Bakalova. “Do you have to put on a mask that everything is fine? In the next scene, she’s going to play the game and pretend that we’re the glamorous, perfect couple.” The Trumps, in “The Apprentice,” live in a world of paper-thin images, one that grows so encompassing that Donald no longer feels anything for the people to whom he was once loyal. They’re props in his stage show.

“The Apprentice” will drop in the midst of the most chaotic presidential election of our lifetime. “The way it lands in this extremely polarized situation, for me as an artist, is exciting. I won’t lie to you,” says Abbasi.

When asked if he was concerned about blowback from a Trump 47 presidency, Stan says, “You can’t do this movie and not be thinking about all those things, but I really have no idea. I’m still in shock from going from an assassination attempt to the next weekend having a president step down [from a reelection bid].”

Stan’s job, as he sees it, was to synthesize everything he’d absorbed — all those videos on his phone — into a person who made sense. This Trump had to be part of a coherent story, not just the flurry of news updates to which we’ve become accustomed.

“You can take a Bach or a Beethoven, and everyone’s going to play that differently on the piano, right?” Stan says. (His pianist mother named him for Johann Sebastian Bach.) “So this is my take on what I’ve learned. I have to strip myself of expectations of being applauded for this, if people are going to like it or people are going to hate it. People are going to say whatever they want. Hopefully they should think at least before they say it.”

It’s a reality that Stan is now used to — the work is the work, and the way people interpret him is none of his business. Perhaps that’s why he has run away from ever being the same thing twice. “I could sit with you today and tell you passionately what my truth is, but it doesn’t matter,” he says. “Because people are more interested in a version of you that they want to see, rather than who you are.”

“The Apprentice” has been the subject of extreme difference of opinion by many who have yet to see it. It’s been read — and will continue to be after its release — as anti-Trump agitprop. The truth is chewier and more complicated, and, perhaps, unsuited for these times.

“Are we going to live in a world where anyone knows what the truth is anymore? Or is it just a world that everyone wants to create for themselves?” Stan asks.

His voice — the one that shares a slight accent with Trump but that is, finally, Stan’s own — is calm and clear. “People create their own truth right now,” he says. “That’s the only thing that I’ve made peace with; I don’t need to twist your arm if that’s what you want to believe. But the way to deal with something is to actually confront it.”

#Variety #Sebastian Stan #Photoshoot #A Different Man #The Apprentice #Thunderbolts*#Marvel #Interview #mrs-stans

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