#red and kitty and eric

[that70sshowgoldencouple]

"Eat a pop-tart!" 🤣

Season 4, Episode 6: The Relapse

[poguelandia]

THAT '70S SHOW (1998-2006) 1.01, “That '70s Pilot”

[agaypanic]

Could you do something with Hyde (actually, any t70s character if you think ot fits better) and the reader whos usually feels like a teacher's pet. But they see the reader at a batting cage or something. Sorry if that isn't a lot, happy requests are open again!!!

Wear a Helmet (Steven Hyde X Forman!Reader)

Masterlist

Request Something!

Summary: Steven Hyde thinks you’re nothing more than Eric’s sister, a try-hard, goody two-shoes teacher’s pet. But while taking a cruise around town, he sees a completely different side of you at a batting cage.

A/N: made reader eric’s sister bc idk it feels right to me. Idk how batting cages work

***

“Are you seriously doing homework right now?” Hyde asked, looking at your work from over your shoulder. Rolling your eyes, you ignored him. You should’ve known that you’d regret studying in the basement, but it felt like the best place at the time. You didn’t want to be cooped up in your room, your mom was busy gossiping in the kitchen while your dad read the newspaper, and you didn’t want to walk to the library.

Eventually, Hyde’s stare from behind his sunglasses broke your concentration. You turned to look at him. “I know that all you think about is lighting up Hyde, but some of us actually have a future to think about.” You patted his shoulder teasingly and went back to your work.

“It’s just a question, man.” He responded, throwing his hands up in defense while waltzing over to his chair, as if the tone of said question wasn’t judgemental. “Only asked because Scooby-Doo is on.”

“Unfortunately, I have more important things to do than watch the gang expose another guy in a mask.”

Hyde turned the TV on anyway, flipping to the aforementioned show. Although you did have more important things to do, you couldn’t help but glance up every couple of seconds to see what was happening. 

Eventually, you had completely forgotten your work in favor of the show. You only realized how much time had passed when the episode ended, and you looked down to see that your homework was still half finished.

“Damn it.” You muttered, gathering your things. Clearly, trying to study in the basement was a bad idea. “I’m going to the library.”

“It’s seven PM,” Hyde replied, looking at his watch.

“I’ll get Eric to drive me.” And if he refused, you could just threaten to tell your parents about Donna sneaking into his room almost every night this week. “See ya.”

“Bye,” Hyde called out, reaching for the remote to change the channel. “Nerd.” He said under his breath.

“I heard that!”

***

When it had reached ten o’clock, Hyde started to get a little worried. Although, he’d never admit that out loud. You still weren’t back from studying, and your curfew was in half an hour. Part of him wondered if his distractions had pissed you off so much that you decided to leave home and not come back. You weren’t dramatic enough to go through with that though.

“Hey, Forman.” Hyde flipped through an old magazine to try to seem casual and uncaring. “Where’s your sister? Sneaking around with a guy or something?”

“Laurie or Y/n?” Eric asked, wondering why Hyde would be interested in either sister’s affairs.

“Y/n.”

“She’s at the library. Told me she would walk home.”

Hyde looked up from his magazine, which he threw on the table. He looked at Eric, completely unamused. “You’re letting your little sister walk around town this late at night? I wouldn’t even do that… I think.”

Eric rolled his eyes and stood up from the couch. “She’s almost eighteen, Hyde. And she said she’d call me if she needed a ride.” He started to walk up the stairs to the kitchen. “If you’re so concerned, you can pick her up.”

“Fine, I will,” Hyde replied, getting a little heated. The curly-headed boy fished his keys out of his pocket and went up the other basement stairs that led outside. After getting out of the backyard, Hyde settled into the El Camino. Just before he pulled out of the driveway and onto the street, he paused. “Where the hell is the library?”

***

The library ended up not being that difficult to find. What Hyde had difficulty locating was you. The library closed at nine, and it was now a quarter after ten. Hyde wasn’t one for walking, but he knew it couldn’t have taken you over an hour just to get home.

So he started searching.

Hyde drove all around town, peering out his window for a glimpse of you. He went to the Hub, the school, and even the water tower. Nothing.

When it was close to your curfew, he figured he should give up his search. You had to have been home by now; you were too much of a goody-goody to break curfew or any other rule. So Hyde turned the car around and started heading back home to the Formans.

“What the hell…?” Until he passed by the Point Place Family Fun Center and recognized your sweater. The wheels of Hyde’s El Camino squealed from how hard he turned to get into the parking lot. As he turned off the car and got out, he realized what you were doing. You were in one of the batting cages, swinging a bat at oncoming balls. Hyde didn’t know what was more shocking, the fact that you were batting balls or the fact that you didn’t miss a single one. “Y/n?”

At the call of your name, you turned and looked at Hyde, expression quickly going from startled to confused. “Hyde? What are you- Oof!”

Hyde ran to the cage and swung the door open, pulling you to the side while you rubbed your now slightly throbbing head. “You okay?”

“Why-” You wanted to ask Hyde what the hell he was doing here, but figured your possible head injury was the more important matter. Plus, it wasn’t often that Hyde seemed so concerned for your well-being, and you didn’t feel like ruining the rare moment. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Aren’t you supposed to wear a helmet or something?” 

“It’s more fun without it.” You shrugged, setting your bat on the fence since you figured you wouldn’t be batting any longer tonight. “Besides, it makes my hair flat.”

“Right.” Hyde nodded, rolling his eyes, which you could barely see because of his sunglasses. Hyde was the only person you knew who wore sunglasses when there was no sun. “Maybe you should start wearing one. Don’t wanna break that big brain of yours. Besides, I think you’re starting to get a bump.”

Your hand flew to the side of your head, feeling around. “Say you’re lying, oh my god.”

Hyde smiled a little at your reaction. “What are you even doing here? I didn’t think baseball would be… your thing.”

You shrugged again. “It’s a good stress reliever, I guess. And I didn’t feel like going home after the library closed.”

He nodded in understanding before remembering why he was looking for you in the first place. “Speaking of home, I think you’re gonna miss curfew.”

“What?!” Hyde had never seen you react so quickly to something. You looked at your watch, confirming that you were five minutes away from possibly getting grounded, and ran to pick up all the balls that you hit so you could put them in the basket. When the cage was tidy, you grabbed your bag and the bat, ready to return it to the front desk and book it to the El Camino. “Hyde, start the car!” You yelled over your shoulder as you ran.

Hyde laughed as he watched your panicked speed. No matter how hard you could try to seem like a rebel, you’d always be Goody-Goody Forman.

[tinydancerfreelancersblog]

[la-luna-di-luiza]

[thestupidhelmet]

Fanfic Ask Game

Put a color in my ask box, and I'll answer the corresponding question. Please ask me only one at a time. 😄

If you'd like me to ask you a question in return from this list, add a ✏️.

💚 Green: Do you ever feel inspired by and/or jealous of other people's writing?

♥️ Red: Do you ever feel anxious or scared while writing? If so, why?

💙 Blue: What inspires you to finish writing a fanfic, and what makes you quit writing one at any stage in the process?

💜 Purple: Name one song you're listening to while writing your next/current fanfic. How or why does it help the writing process?

🧡 Orange: When in the day do you typically write?

🩷 Pink: Do you find a certain character (or characters) easy to write? More difficult -- and if so, do you avoid writing that character (or those characters) when possible?

🖤 Black: Do you think about your story when you're not physically writing it? Does it help with plotting scenes, character arcs, etc.?

💛 Yellow: Do you ever alter, highlight, or de-emphasize certain canonical traits in a character? If so, why and describe how.

🤍 White: What's a fanfic scenario or idea you'd like someone else to write so that you can read it?

🤎 Brown: How did you decide to write (or why are you writing) a certain fanfic? (Asker, feel free to choose a specific story you're curious about. You can also let the answerer choose the story.)

[manicpixeedream]

[thatseventiesbitch]

Well what do you know ... I had one more in me.

I am thrilled to share the original script for S7xE25 "Til The Next Goodbye" with you all. There's lots of Eric/Donna goodness in this script - I was hoping there would be. 🥺

Read on for my summary of the differences between the table draft and the episode that aired!

Jackie and Kelso's scene to start the episode is nearly identical, but there's an added line about the Chicago sports teams that makes me (a transplant Chicagoan) laugh:

The rest of the scene is the same. It ends with Kelso offering to stay awhile and get a burger with Jackie.

Next up we have the scene in the Forman kitchen with Eric, Donna, Red, Kitty, and Bob. It's written a little differently in the table draft:

Donna bought Eric travel books for the extremely nervous traveler lol 🥺🥰 (Also - can I get that series?? Asking for a friend.)

I also like how she pushed back on Kitty here on Eric's behalf, reminding her that her adult son can make his own decisions... well, until Kitty glares at her and Donna ducks behind Eric to get out of the swing zone 🤣

Then we have the scene of the gang in the basement.

In the table draft, Eric isn't worried about his mom throwing him a surprise going away party.

Eric, Donna, and Hyde's cut dialogue here made me laugh out loud. 😂

Kelso's recounting of dropping off Jackie - and Donna's about her calling several times to criticize her outfit - are the same as in the episode. Then Jackie calls, and Hyde's surprised she wants to speak to Eric.

Eric and Jackie's dialogue is a little different (more sentimental, I'd say):

The scene ends the same way, with Jackie asking to speak to Red after she's finished talking to Eric.

The next scene is Fez and Charlie talking on the driveway, and then Eric and Donna approach. Fez tells the story about what a good friend Eric is because he poured soda all over him after he fell into a hole Kelso and Hyde lured him into 🙈. It's word for word, except Charlie interjects a few lines.

It's particularly clear in this draft that their original plan was to set up Charlie to be a regular in season 8 following Topher and Ashton's departure. As I think most of us know, Charlie's actor, Bret Harrison, got offered his own show called The Loop, resulting in T70 writing him off in the first episode of S8 by saying he died falling off the water tower. I am personally in the I-would-definitely-have-preferred-Charlie-over-Randy camp, even though they still might've tried pairing him up with Donna to manufacture angst. This gives me an idea for a What If story. Hmm...

There's also this added exchange at the end of the scene, mocking Fez's sentimentality and manhood 🙄

Next is Hyde and Leo at Grooves, discussing Loud Girl. The scene is word-for-word up until this point:

Leo provides more of his stoned insight: "I mean, you guys fight sometimes but deep down you really care about her. There's no shame in that." 🥰

Speaking of Charlie... here's another scene he had with Fez and Eric, that was greatly shortened in the aired episode:

*Wonders about how Fez's S8 storylines would have been different if Charlie was around instead of Randy* 🤔

The scene continues with this:

Which leads directly into the guys' final circle.

Eric says, "Hey, pass me some more courage!" to start the scene and then they go into the exact dialogue from the episode.

The following scene with Red and Kitty lecturing the guys in the kitchen while they're stoned out of their minds is also word-for-word to what aired. It ends with Red saying he can't think of any worse punishment than sending Eric to Africa, so guess what pal, he's going to Africa!

Hyde and Leo's next scene about Loud Girl, Chicago, and Leo watching the store for him is also nearly identical. I'm not including screenshots because of the image limit.

Up next, Eric and Kelso at the hospital getting their shots. In the table draft, Red came along with them, too. Well, until he heads across the street to get a beer. 😂

Kelso is extra pervy towards Donna.

I prefer their interaction from the aired episode, where she gives him a painful wedgie when he asks her to help him with his pants. 😅

Eric and Kelso's goodbye moment is similar, but I can see why some of the superfluous lines were cut.

I think it's obvious that the show was acknowledging here that both actors/characters would be leaving in S8.

In the draft, Eric and Donna's goodbye scene is next. It's in his bedroom rather than on top of the Vista Cruiser.

I kind of laughed at Fez realizing he crossed a line and that this is too intimate of a moment for him to witness, but I'm just not a big fan of the Fez-creeping-on-E/D-from-closets joke to begin with so, meh. I feel fine that this was cut.

I do love that among Eric's "bare necessities" for the year away are his GI Joe's and Donna's bra (🤣), and also the stage direction that when they hug, "it's obvious that neither of them wants to let go." 🥹😭

But overall, I prefer the scene that aired in the episode.

The scene in the episode is longer, and includes more sentimentality from Eric (he tells her she's his best friend, and that he loves her so much).

It's interesting that they flipped the line, "I'll be back before you know it, and then we'll have our whole lives to spend together." In the table draft it's Eric who says it, but in the episode it's Donna's line.

And finally, I think thematically it makes more sense for Eric and Donna's last scene on the show (theoretically anyway, we all know that Topher came back for a cameo in the series finale but they probably didn't know that then) to be on the Vista Cruiser. It's a natural bookend to their story; it subtly reminds us how far they've come when they reminisce about having their first kiss.

Eric and Red's scene is next. It's very similar, but with a few different lines.

Donna packing crackers so Eric doesn't get car sick on the way to the airport is sweet/wifey of her, but it is that same ridiculous infantilizing of Eric routine that the writers really leaned into in S7 (and eventually T90S, too). 🙄

I liked Red's final line in the actual episode better. "You lose that knife, don't come home," always gets a big laugh from me.

Finally, the goodbye scene on the driveway.

Kitty has, of course, thrown him a going-away party. She has a banner printed, but there's a mix up and it wishes him a "HAPPY RETIREMENT, FRANK!" 😂

Leo's already doing a bang-up job watching the record store for Hyde, *lol*

And there's some more Fez and Charlie interaction, making me wonder - again - how Charlie staying on as a main cast member in season 8 would've changed storylines for Fez, and for everyone else...

Eric and Hyde's scene is very similar, except Eric starts to get sentimental and Hyde immediately shuts it down.

Bob has a surprisingly nice interaction with Eric (before introducing his oompa band). 🙄

Kitty's goodbye to Eric is similar - she hugs him and doesn't let go until they have to pull her off of him *lol*

But I missed Eric's line from the episode about, "I'm really only allowed one carry-on." I wonder if it was improvised.

Just like in the episode, Eric's car won't start and so his friends and family push the Vista Cruiser from the driveway for his series exit. I get by with a little help from my friends, right? 🥹

Now, there is one more Very Important scene in this episode: the one with Hyde knocking on Jackie's motel room door in Chicago.

I hit the image limit for this post so I can't include the last screenshot. But I'll type the last page of the script in case any Zennies wanted to see it:

Hyde: Y'know, okay. (THEN) Is everything alright?

Jackie: Everything's fine. I just didn't expect -

(Kelso enters wearing just a bathrobe and carrying a bucket of ice)

Kelso: I checked and no one can see us doing it from the parking lot.

(Kelso sees Hyde, screams, and throws the bucket of ice in the air. Ice flies everywhere. The moment is frozen until...)

Hyde: You son of a -

(Kelso turns to run out the door. Hyde grabs his robe. As Kelso bolts, Hyde holds onto the robe which peels off Kelso as he disappears out the door)

Kelso (OS): I'm nude!

Fade Out.

It's very similar to what aired, and imo doesn't hold any extra clues as to what Jackie and Kelso did (or planned to do) in the hotel room. The writers left it purposefully vague and open to interpretation.

The tag at the end of the episode is what aired - Kelso running around the parking lot naked, grabbing a fedora to cover his privates, and then running into two attractive women and flirting with them.

Whew, that was a long one! Thanks for reading along with me, @thatseventiesbitch and check out some of the other original That '70s Show scripts I've posted!

S2xE20 "Kiss of Death" S2xE22 "Jackie Moves On" S2xE23 "Holy Crap!" S2xE26 "Moon Over Point Place" S3xE23 "Backstage Pass" S4xE2 "Eric's Depression" S5xE21 "Trampled Under Foot" S6xE20 "Squeezebox" S7xE8 "Angie"

[escapismqueen]

They didn’t give ‘that 90’s show’ enough of a chance. Like ffs stop cancelling shows with potential too soon

[einsteinsugly]

Retcon Time!

Red and Kitty caught the gang smoking weed in the season 7 finale, and they're all mad, shocked that they've been smoking weed down there for all these years.

But this is an obvious retcon. They found out that the gang smoked weed down there in late season 2/early season 3, when Hyde got arrested for possession, and Eric blurted out that he smoked too. Red even installed a smoke detector in the basement, grounded both Eric and Hyde, and generally went nuclear.

[brain-fuzzies]

That '70s Show, The Circle - The Sims 4

[that70sshowgoldencouple]

Flashback Foto of the time Kurtwood Smith, Debra Jo Rupp, and Topher Grace were at the American Comedy Awards in 1999!

This picture of the three of them makes me so happy! 🥰

[phantomstatistician]

Fandom: That '70s Show

Sample Size: 1,287 stories

Source: AO3

[never-stop-dreaming30]

The Things You Give Part 36

SIKKKEEE look I lied, y'all. There's like three or four more parts left! I'lll be posting the rest tomorrow! I hope you enjoy my loves! The story isn't over yet!

Warnings: Smuttttt. Gotta go out with a bang lol

“Have you guys heard from Markus?” Y/n asked Donna over the phone from her hotel room. She had called Donna to check in on her since Eric left. She was on day three of being in New York and couldn’t stop thinking of her friends.

“Not since he left Chicago,” Donna responded. “He called to let us know that he’d be gone awhile, but didn’t say where he was going. Jackie really affected him.”

“Well, yeah, wouldn’t it affect you?” One of the babies started to fuss in that moment. Y/n turned to Hyde and motioned for him to check on them.

“I mean, yeah,” Donna answered truthfully. “When Eric left me at the altar, all I wanted was to pack up and leave for a while.”

“Yeah, but instead it was Eric who skipped town,” Y/n pointed out.

“And yet, he thought he was the humiliated one,” she laughed.

“So, what happened after he ripped the towel off Kelso?”

Hyde whipped his head in her direction, confused and bewildered to hear such a sentence. Y/n gave him a look—a look that said, “I’ll tell you later.”

“He chased Kelso for, like, twelve blocks and finally faltered back after Kelso circled back to the motel and ran into the room and locked the door,” Donna continued. “Apparently, it didn’t end there and Markus continued to shout through the door, demanding to be let in and kick Kelso’s ass. Jackie was trying to calm him down, but he was just getting more irate. Eventually, the cops were called and Markus was asked to leave otherwise he was going to be arrested.”

“Dude, that’s crazy,” Y/n commented.

“I know! After that, I guess he ran home, packed a bag and just…took off. We haven’t heard from him since.”

“Man, I hope he’s okay.”

“Well, I don’t know about everyone else, but me and Fez got postcards in the mail. And by the looks of it, it looks like he stopped in Vegas.”

“Vegas? Huh,” Y/n huffed. “Maybe he’ll come back a changed man.”

“That’s usually not the reason people go to Vegas after a bad breakup,” Donna chuckled. “Oh! And did you hear that a new guy moved to town?”

“A new guy? Who?”

“I don’t know a lot about him, but his name is Randy and he just started at the record store to help Leo. Apparently, he’s been bringing a lot of business”

“Wait, what?” Y/n turned to her husband who was changing a diaper. “Steven, did you hire someone before we left?”

“No? Why?”

“Some guy named Randy is helping Leo. Do you know anything about this?”

“What?!” Hyde replied roughly and gestured for Y/n to give him the phone as he walked over. “Hey, Donna. What do you mean some guy is working at the store? Where’s Leo?”

“I’m not sure half the time honestly. When he is there, he’s usually locked up in your office. This Randy guy has been running the store on Leo’s behalf. Now that I think about it, I’ve seen this guy more than I’ve seen Leo.”

“What about Mandy? Isn’t she there?”

“Oh, yeah about her…”

“What? What about her?” Hyde asked nervously.

“She quit.”

“She qu—why?!”

“Mandy quit?!” Y/n asked, barley containing her glee.

He gave her look. “You don’t gotta be so happy about it.”

“Apparently, she didn’t like Randy coming in and pretty much being promoted to manager and changing everything.”

“Manager?!” Steven almost screeched. “Pretty sure this isn’t legal.”

“Legal? Since when do you care?” Y/n poked.

“You’re right,” he agreed. “I’ve clearly been with you too long. You’re rubbing off on me…I want a divorce.”

She grinned widely at him. “Sorry, ‘til death do us part, baby. And death will part us.”

The way Hyde stared at her, he couldn’t tell if he was scared, impressed, or turned on. Or all three.

“Uh, anyway, um,” he stuttered and cleared his throat. “W-what changes have been made?”

“Well, when I walked in there last night, he pretty much rearranged the whole store,” Donna answered, having chosen to ignore her friends’ flirting.

“He did WHAT?!” Steven yelled, forgetting his conversation with his wife. “Who gave him the right—Leo,” he growled. “What else?”

“Oh, he alphabetized all the records. You know how you had it sorted by band and genre?”

“No?”

“Okay, well you remember how Angie had it sorted by band and genre? Now, he has the whole store alphabetized.”

“What the hell?! I’m going to kick his ass.”

“You didn’t even know it was organized that way until I told you,” Donna laughed. “Why are you angry about it now?”

“Because he’s still messing with my store!” He turned to Y/n. “We’re going to have to cut the trip short.”

“But I still have to go down to campus and sign up for classes!”

“We gotta leave afterwards. This—this Randy guy is messing with my store and his self proclaimed manager position.”

Her shoulders slumped. “No sightseeing or romantic dinner?”

“We can do that when we move here in a couple months. But I need to sort things out first.”

Y/n nodded before she walked into the bathroom to finish getting ready.

Hyde turned back to the phone. “Is there anything else?”

“No, no that’s it. But, I do have a question for you…what are you going to do with the store once you do move?”

He froze. “I…I didn’t really think that far.”

“Maybe this Randy guy can help.”

“Donna, we’re going to be here for four years at least. God knows what’s going to happen after she graduates. Whether we stay or not, I’m not sure if she’s ever going to want to come back to Point Place. So, I’m not sure if this Randy can help us if we shut down.”

“Are you considering closing the record store?”

“Call it relocating if you will.”

“Wow…so you guys really are moving out of Point Place forever…”

The silence following the end of the sentence made Hyde’s ears perk up. “Donna? You alright, man?”

“Yeah, it’s just…” Donna chuckled sadly and sighed. “Everything is changing and everyone is leaving. I mean, Eric’s gone, Kelso is leaving, you and Y/n are leaving soon, Markus is MIA…I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but I’m going to miss Jackie too. I’ll even miss Fez and his creepiness.”

“Oh, man, it’ll be okay.”

“I know, but everyone I’ve known my whole life is leaving. And here I am, staying here.”

“Uh…this sounds like a conversation for Y/n—”

“I mean, I stayed here for Eric and then he goes and leaves!”

Hyde pulled away from the phone. “Y/n!”

“And to think all that I’ve given him—”

“Y/n!”

“What?!” she asked irritated, coming out of the bathroom with her hair in rollers and only one eye that had mascara on.

Hyde waved her over as he continued to listen to Donna rant. “Uh-huh,” he said absentmindedly before grabbing his wife by the shoulders and replacing her in his place.

Confused, she grabbed the phone from him and put to her ear to catch Donna mid-rant.

“You know the other day, he was supposed to call me, but he called his mom instead!” she yelled. “That twiggy little punk-ass—”

“Steven!” Y/n whispered-yelled.

He chuckled. “Sucker!”

                                                --The Next Day--

“Mrs. Forman, what a wonderful idea to send a tape to Eric!” Donna beamed as Kitty got the tape recorder ready. Her, Fez, Kelso, and Kitty sat at the kitchen table in the Forman kitchen.

“Oh, please I’m full of wonderful ideas,” she said proudly. “One time, when Eric was at a summer camp, I sent him a card with a big picture of my face on it that said, ‘Mommy loves you’. Well, it made him miss me so much the next day he called and begged me to come home!”

“Ah, yes. The summer of a thousand wedgies,” Donna recalled.

“Oh, Eric is going to be so excited to hear so many familiar voices,” Kitty gushed.

“Oh! I can do Porky Pig,” Fez said and grabbed the microphone and hit record. “Hababadahababada, that’s all people!”

Kitty yanked the microphone from Fez with a scowl. “Okay, then, let’s start the tape.” She rewound the tape before pressing record. “Hi, Eric. It’s your mother. I’m here with Donna and Fez.”

Donna took the microphone from Kitty’s outstretched hand. “Hi, honey!” she said cheerfully as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “Thank you for the postcards about monkeys. I’m still bananas about you, too!”

She handed the microphone back to Kitty. “Okay, let’s see. Where to start…well, your father and I were very furious when we found you smoking in the basement. The minute you left the airport, your father and I did what the Feds’ call a ‘sweep’…”

                                    --Flashback—

“How dare you boys smoke in my basement!” Kitty exclaimed as she was frantically searching the couch cushions. “When you know how hard I work to keep it smelling lemony-fresh!”

“You morons just hung vacancies on your asses and my foot is looking for a room!” Red barked.

“Here it is!” both Red and Kitty said at the same time as they both held up two baggies.

“TWO bags?!” Red shouted.

“I’ve never seen those before in my life!” Hyde said defensively. “Your son has a real problem!”

“Kitty, I want you to take this garbage and flush it down the toilet!”

“I’m just glad we caught you boys before this became an everyday thing!” Kitty cried out, feeling betrayed.

Red turned to Fez and Hyde. “Is that all of it?”

“Yes, sir. That’s all of it,” Hyde said.

“Good. Out of everyone of your dumbass friends, I expected more from you, Steven. You can’t be doing this around your children. You need to live by example and not bring this crap in their lives. You’re not your mother and you sure as hell aren’t Bud. So, act like it!”

Hyde was silent for a moment. “I understand, Red.”

“Good. Now, you’re sure there’s nothing else here?”

“Yes, now there’s nothing else for us to do but smoke Candyland,” Fez chirped before it dawned on him. “I mean, play Candysmoke, I mean—”

Before Red let him continue his fumbling, he whipped out the boardgame and flipped open the lid to reveal another baggie.

“Ai, no!”

“And so I flushed it all down the toilet and taught everyone a lesson,” Kitty continued with the story.

“Why don’t you tell Eric was else happened?” Donna asked, giggling.

“Oh, oh! Let me! Give me that,” Fez said, giddy and took the microphone. “I’ll tell him.”

“Kitty! I found another one!” Red called out as he entered his way to his bedroom, finding Kitty in the bathroom with the door closed and smoke drifting from underneath. He knocked on the door. “Kitty?”

The bathroom door swung on, revealing a disoriented looking Kitty and a cloud of smoke behind her.

“What the hell?!” Red exclaimed. “What do you have to say for yourself?!”

She looked at him with red, glazed eyes. “I’m STARVING,” she responded and cackled.

“I still can’t believe Red caught you with the guys’ stash,” Donna laughed.

“Someone’s getting a tie-dyed apron for her birthday!” Fez chimed in, a wide smile on his face.

“No, I just…” Kitty defended herself. “I just wanted to see what all the hubbub was about. I mean I was skeptical about tubber ware and that was life changing!”

She turned back to the recorder. “Anyway, Eric, I suffered the consequences and your father gave me a very stern talking to.”

“Kitty, when we took our vows, we said we’d be together through sickness and in health!” Red said, him and Steven standing in front of Kitty in the kitchen with her sitting in a chair. Just like the boys had done not long before. “But nobody said anything about what to do if your wife turns into a dope fiend!” He was getting madder by the word and was practically spitting. “You’re a nurse for God’s sake! You know this stuff is bad news! Bad news isn’t the half of it!”

“Here are the facts: when the smoke hits the brain, the cells start dying. This process causes impaired judgement and hallucinations and a lot of other wonderful things!” Hyde said.

“Is it Eric going away? Is that why you’re using this stuff?!” Red interrogated.

As he was talking, Kitty was looking at the walls changing shapes and colors.

“Kitty, if you were feeling blue, you didn’t have to turn to drugs!” he continued. “I would’ve made you a martini!”

At this point, Kitty was laughing loudly, watching their heads grow bigger like a balloon.

“What’s so damn funny?!” he roared.  

“Is it the big head thing?” Hyde asked, chuckling.

“I hardly felt a thing,” Kitty stated.

“You ate a whole box of uncooked spaghetti,” Donna pointed out.

“I needed something crunchy,” Kitty responded matter-of-factly.

Donna took the microphone from Kitty. “Anyway, Eric, the day you left, Markus went to go see Jackie in Chicago. When he got there, he walked in on Jackie and Kelso about to…get busy.”

“Have sex,” Kitty corrected.

“Dooooooo iiiiittttttt,” Fez joked.

“Anyway, Kelso told us everything that happened when he got back,” Donna said.

“No, hardly anything happened, okay?” Kelso defended, grabbing a popsicle from the freezer in the basement. “Jackie asked me to stay ‘cause she was lonely. And the next thing I know, I’m naked. And then Markus shows up and kicks me out the door! And so I had drive all the way back in this dress that I found. All the truckers were flashing their lights and honking their horns at me.”

“That was pretty great,” Fez giggled.

“Man, Markus is going to kick your ass,” Donna said seriously.

“I know, and that’s why I gotta get out of here before someone kicks the crap out of me.”

He toward the basement door just as Jackie walked through. The second her eyes landed on Kelso, she started throwing her fists and legs wherever it would land. “YOU JERK!”

“Ow! Ow! Watch the face!”

“Jackie, aren’t you supposed to be in Chicago?” Donna asked.

“Yeah, well I was, but I’m here to get Markus back. Where is he?”

“He’s not here,” Kelso responded.

“Yeah, he left after you two were about to DOOOOOO ITTTTTT!” Fez sang-song.

“Oh, my God this is horrible,” Jackie whined and sunk into a chair at the table. “My life is ruined. I quit my job, I lost my boyfriend. My whole life is ruined.”

“I’m really sorry, Jackie,” Donna said.

“Look, Jackie I’m really sorry about what happened. I never meant to come between you and Markus,” Kelso said sincerely and sat next to her on the couch. “Let me ask you one question, though…are we back together or not?”

Jackie gave him a soured look. “Oh, you are just as dumb as ever!”

“Okay, you can insult me all you want, but answer the question.”

“NO!”

“No, you won’t answer the question? Why not?!”

“Because we’re not together!”

“THAT’S the reason why you won’t answer the question?!”

“NO!” she yelled as she elongated the word.

“THEN WHAT’S THE REASON?!” Kelso shouted back.

“And then went on about…half an hour,” Donna concluded the story.

The sliding door opened, revealing Bob. “Hey Kitty, I need to borrow any oil or butter. Anything greasy, really.”

“Why?” Kitty asked. “Are you cooking?”

“Nope. Tanning,” Bob said, grinning. “Hey, what’s up with the tape recorder?”

“Oh, I’m sending a tape to Eric in Africa. Want to say hi?”

“Sure!”

“Don’t! Give him the microphone,” Donna sighed, holding her head in her hand.

“What’s new pussycat. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!” Bob sang.

“Hey, Donna, boo-boo,” Fez said, blowing her a kiss.

“Dad, can’t you say nothing normal?” Donna begged.

“Normal doesn’t put people’s asses in the seats, Donna,” he said.

“What seats are you talking about?!” Donna exclaimed.

“Hey, Red! Say something to Eric!” Kitty said, holding out the microphone as he walked through the door.

“Sure,” he responded and took the microphone. “Son, I was in the garage the other day and saw your old baseball mitt. And it made me think, ‘What a waste of money.’”

“Red!” Kitty exclaimed and quickly shut off the recorder. He pranced out the kitchen with a smirk. Kitty adjusted herself in her seat before pressing record again. “Eric, your leaving was very hard on your father.”

Kitty was standing in front of the washer and dryer, folding some freshly-cleaned towels. Red, in his excitement and giddiness, twirled down the stairs with a big smile on his face.

“I feel like…dancing!” he said and grabbed Kitty by the hand, causing her to throw the towel in a random direction, and twirled her into his arms. Dipping her to the floor, he quickly brought her back up and picked up one of Eric’s Millenium Falcon and twirled and danced his way to the door before throwing it outside.

“By the way, we donated some of your toys to the church!”

                                                --Later—

Kitty held the microphone to Fez who was tapping a deck of cards on a bottle of soy sauce while sitting in the living room. Donna sat besides Fez, bored out of her mind.

“Give up, Eric?” Kitty asked. “That’s the sound of a deck of cards hitting a bottle of soy sauce.”

Donna reached over and grabbed the microphone. “Eric, please come home. You have no idea how much I miss you.”

“Oh, honey, I miss you, too,” Kitty said, sadly. “I don’t think I’ll ever be happy until I see you again.”

“We’re home!” Y/n called through the door as she and Steven stumbled inside, each holding a baby carrier.

“STEVEN! Y/N! YOU’RE HOME!” Kitty screeched and threw down the recorder and ran over to them. She threw her arms around them, disregarding them holding the bags and babies.

“Good to see you, too, Mom,” Y/n greeted and started to fall against her mother’s hold. “Mom? I’m falling.” Kitty didn’t budge. “Mom, I’m falling!”

“Sorry,” Kitty said and brought Steven in for hug.

“You guys weren’t supposed to be home until Monday. What happened?” Fez asked.

“We got a call from Donna saying that someone is messing with my store. I need to go sort some things out,” Hyde responded, putting down Kat on the piano bench.

“Oh, yeah, I was down there the other day. The store was closed in the middle of the day,” Donna said.

“Alright, I gotta go down there. Now,” he responded and shrugged his bag off his shoulder. “Y/n, are you going to be okay with the babies?”

“Yes, of course, go. Let me know what happens.”

“Thank you, you’re the best,” he responded and kissed her cheek. “I’ll be back.”

Just as he walked over to the door, he swung it up seeing Markus already standing there.

“Oh…hey,” Hyde said and stepped to the side to let Markus in.

“Hey, man,” he greeted as he entered the house.

“Markus, where the hell have you been?!” Donna asked.

“Oh, honey, I’m glad you’re safe!” Kitty fussed and gave him a tight hug.

“Miss Kitty, he doesn’t like hugs,” Fez informed and pulled her away before slamming his body against Markus’s and pulling him into a hug.

“Yeah, I missed you too, buddy,” Markus said, chuckling. “I thought I’d stop by here first before going home. Just wanted to let you know that I’m back.”

“I spilled my soda and my—Mark!” Kelso screeched. “I—I don’t know what to say.”

“How ‘bout ‘ow’?”

“Why would I say—?”

Before Kelso could finish the question, Markus suckered punched him square in the jaw. He fell to the floor in a thud, groaning before it turned into laughter.

“Oh, I get it!” he giggled.

“Eric, Markus just hit Michael,” Kitty whispered into the microphone. “And while I am very disappointed in Markus for hitting Michael, it was very exciting.”

“Come on, man, get up,” Markus demanded and helped Kelso off the floor.

“Why? So, you can deck me again?”

“No, I’m good now,” he responded. “Everything I wanted to say was in that one punch.”

“Not gonna lie…I peed myself a little on the way down,” Kelso announced.

“Ew, Kelso,” Y/n said.

“Well, I’m going to go home and change,” Markus announced and turned around to the kitchen, but was stopped when Jackie entered.

“Markus?” she asked. No one had heard come into the living room. “Where have you been?”

“Uh…I’ve been hanging out in Las Vegas,” he responded.

“Well, we need to talk.”

“About what? How you nailed Kelso?!”

“No, about our relationship!”

“Okay, I’ll start…you nailed Kelso!”

“You never gave me a chance to explain!” she cried out.

“BECAUSE YOU NAILED KELSO!”

“Mom, start taping. Eric loves it when he yells at her,” Y/n whispered.

Kitty held up the microphone a little closer to them.

“Markus, I never even slept with Michael,” Jackie pleaded.

“Yeah, right because Kelso is always showing up at my hotel room naked with a bucket of ice,” he spat.

“You know this is your fault, too!” Jackie said, raising her voice.

“You two stop yelling,” Kitty cut in before taking the tape out, turning it over, waiting a few seconds and then held up the microphone between them. “Go ahead.”

“You know what? Forget it,” Markus said curtly and stomped out the house.

“Well, I guess that’s that,” Jackie said, her voice breaking and walked back into the kitchen.

“Wow, that was…horrible,” Y/n said.

“I know,” Hyde said and cackled. “It was great.”

Y/n smacked him in his arm. “Steven!”

                                                            ----

When Hyde and Kelso arrived at the record store, they found it locked.

“Why is the store still locked in the middle of the day?” Steven questioned and used his key to unlock the door.

He wasn’t sure what to expect when he walked in, but it definitely wasn’t what was laid out in front of him. Inside, a circle of people sat on the floor with smoke bellowing around them. All of the people were either laying down or swaying to the weird psychedelic music the was playing in the shop. The lights were turned off and the windows had the curtains and blinds drawn.

“Leo! What the hell?!” Hyde yelled and flicked on the lights. “I leave you alone for two days and you turn my store in a stoner den!”

“Oh, hey, man,” Leo slurred. “You’re back early. Come join us!”

“No, man, you gotta get out of here,” he said sternly. “I don’t like what you’ve turned my store into and, by the way, that you hired a new guy without telling me first!”

“Oh, yeah, I put a help wanted sign in the window.”

“Why would you do that?!”

“Because I needed help opening a jar of pickles, man.”

Hyde had to take a deep breath before he said something he would regret. “You and your friends need to be gone. Clean this mess up and leave. I’ll be in my office.” He walked back to where his office was before turning around a second later. “There’s an orgy in my office!” He turned back to Leo. “Get them out of there!”

“You got it, man,” Leo said and went into the office. The scene in front of him put a large smile on his face as he took his jacket off to join them.

                       --Back at the Forman/Hyde residence—

“Y/n, would you like to say something to Eric?” Kitty asked as they all sat around the table.

“Yeah,” she responded and took the microphone. “Hey, bro. I hope you’re doing well in Africa. I and the kids miss you. I know Hyde misses you, too. Not in the conventional way that a normal person with regulated emotions would, but in his own way. Like, the other day while we were in New York…”

Steven and Y/n were walking around the university town with the twins in the stroller. Idly chatting about nothing in particular, they came upon a thrift shop with a big window display. On the display were a couple mannequins wearing Star Wars t-shirts. 

“Oh, man, Eric would love that,” Y/n pointed out nonchalantly.

“Yeah, he would probably say he absolutely needs those t-shirts and go inside. And then when we tell him that’s stupid and doesn’t need them, he would probably say, ‘Why, you stuck up, half witted, scruffy looking nerf herders! You know nothing about good literature.’”

She blinked at her husband. “I’m pretty sure he has said the exact same thing to me before.”

“Yeah, he was always full of stupid phrases like that. Sometimes it wouldn’t even make sense.”

She laughed. “It never did.”

“Yeah…it’s kinda quiet now without it. It’s weird.”

She nodded. “It really is.”

“I’m glad because now I don’t feel the urge to punch him in his stupid face.”

Y/n raised an eyebrow at him. “Uh-huh, sure.”

“Oh, and the constant whining, man. You’re manlier than he was.”

“Uh, thanks?”

“It’s good that he’s away,” Steven said, this time a little softer. “I probably won’t have to revoke his man card every time he whines about Donna.”

Y/n’s gaze softened at him. “Steven?”

“Hm?” he hummed, not taking his eyes off the shirt.

“It’s okay to miss him.”

He scoffed. “I don’t miss that nerd. We’re men, okay Y/n? Men don’t miss men.”

This time she raised both eyebrows. “Is that so?”

“Yeah.” He cleared his throat. “It’s weird. I can feel his absence and notice that it’s quieter without him and wish that he was here to make fun of Kelso and Mark with us, but no, I don’t miss him.”

“Sounds like you do.”

“Well, I don’t!”

“Steven…”

“I don’t miss people, Y/n. You and the kids are basically the only ones I would because you’re my family. That’s the only time a man can miss someone.”

“Steven, Eric is family to you.”

“Yeah? So, what if he is more like a brother to me than my actual brother? Doesn’t mean anything.”

“I think it does.”

“No, stop trying to contradict me!”

She laughed. “I’m not trying to, but it sounds like you’re denying that you miss him. Just say that you do. No one will blame or judge you.”

“Fine, I miss him, alright?! There, ya happy?!”

She smiled at him before laying a hand on his cheek and kissing him. “A little. Hey, I miss him too. Everyone does. He was the weird glue to our group.”

“Yeah, he was…”

“But, it’s a good thing he left so he can move on with his life just like we are. Just like everyone is. It’s not like you guys are going to grow apart. We’re literally family.”

He smiled at her and kissed her once more. “Come on, let’s get back to campus so you can finish registering and then we can get something to eat.”

“And then you know, he spent the rest of the time insulting you some more,” Y/n said, concluding the story. “But it was all out of a place of love. I can send you pictures of the twins. Leo and Kat have started laughing. You should’ve seen Hyde’s reaction…”

“Alright, Leo, your diaper is changed and fresh,” Hyde said and sat on the couch with his son in his lap. He stared at Leo’s face, noticing small details of his son’s features. “You are a handsome little man, just like your dad,” he said, cackling. “You’re going to be a ladies man, for sure.” A beat passed. “I hope you know that I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to be like my parents and bail on you. I’m in for the long haul, man. Don’t you ever forget that.” Leo gripped Hyde’s finger so tight, it almost brought tears to his eyes. “Can you keep a secret? I don’t think I’ve ever loved anyone as much as I love you and your sister. And that says a lot because your mom is the one I have loved the most. And that also says a lot because I’ve never loved anyone. I guess you guys have changed that.” He hummed and gazed at his son lovingly. “Man, you really are the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Aren’t you?” He tickled his stomach and Leo let out a gurgled laugh.

Steven froze in his place, staring at his son. “Did you just—?” He tickled Leo again, which caused another fit of giggles. “Oh, my God,” he gasped, a wide smile spread across his smile. “Leo, man, you’re laughing! Y/n! Y/n, get down here!” He stood with Leo in his arms and bomb rushed to their stairs.

When he got to the middle of the stairs, Y/n was already half way down. “What? I’m in the middle of packing our room. Which, by the way, you promised you would help!”

“Leo laughed.”

“He what?!”

“He laughed, man! Listen,” he responded and tickled Leo again. Leo squirmed in his hold but let out a high pitched laugh.

“Oh, my God!” Y/n cried out, excited. “Our baby boy laughed!”

“Yes, he did!” Hyde exclaimed. “Where’s Kat? I want to see if she laughs, too.”

“Yeah, she’s hanging out with me,” Y/n responded as they both rushed to their room to see Kat laying down in her bassinet. “Hi, baby, can you laugh for mommy and daddy?” She tickled her daughter’s belly, but only received a smile. “Can you laugh for us?”

An idea popped in Steven’s head. He tickled Leo’s stomach again, gaining another laugh from him. When he giggled, that triggered a small laugh out of Kat. And before Y/n and Steven knew it, they were both laughing, ping-ponging off each other.

“Oh, my God. This is the greatest thing ever,” Y/n said, laughing herself.

“It really is,” Steven agreed as he stared lovingly at his family.

“But, you didn’t hear it from me,” Y/n said and handed the microphone to her mom. “I gotta go finish up some packing before me and Donna hang out tonight. Are you still okay to watch the twins for me?”

“Well, I have to be since you’re leaving for New York in three weeks!” Kitty said, albeit loudly.

Y/n looked at her guiltily, but since she returned from New York, all she had been saying were apologies and expressing her guilt, but never regret. And it annoyed Kitty that Y/n wasn’t admitting it.

Silently, Y/n left the kitchen and made her way into the basement to look for more boxes, but when she entered the room, Markus and Jackie were talking.

“Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to get married sooner?” Jackie asked him.

Y/stopped in her tracks and slowly retreated back up the stairs, but stayed at the top to listen in.

“Because I wasn’t sure if I was ready yet,” he answered truthfully. “And now that I’ve thought about it, I was right. I’m not ready yet.”

“Yet?” Jackie asked hopeful, but nodded. “Oh, okay. I can—”

Suddenly, the door opened and a tall, thin blonde woman entered the basement. “Hi, I’m looking for—MARKUS! Hi baby, I missed you!”

“Uh...hey, Sam,” Markus greeted her, confused.

“Who the hell is that?!” Jackie asked, nastily.

“This is Sam. She’s a str—” Markus stopped himself and cleared his throat. “An exotic dancer I met in Vegas.” He turned back to her. “I’m sorry, what’re you doing here?”

“You don’t remember? We got married!” she announced.

“Oh, my God!” Y/n and Jackie exclaimed un unison while Markus sat there with his mouth hanging open.

Markus, Jackie, and Sam whipped their heads to see Y/n on the stairs before bolting it back up.

“Mom! Mom! Gimme the recorder!” Before she let Kitty hand it to her, she had already snatched it from her.

“Alright, Miss Grabby Hands. What’s so important?”

Y/n ignored her as she fumbled to press the record button. “Eric! Eric! Markus married a stripper!”

Kitty gasped. “What?!”

                                                            ∞∞∞

“Hey, Hon,” Y/n greeted Hyde as he walked into their bedroom. She walked over, giving him a quick peck on the lips and went back to the box she was currently packing. “How was your day?”

“It was fine,” he responded and took off his jacket. “Randy is growing on me. Knows how to run the hell out of a store, too. He said he used to run quiet a few businesses before moving here.”

“He moved to Point Place? Why?” she scoffed.

He shrugged and sat on the bed to remove his shoes. “Said he wanted a fresh start and was tired of the city.”

“Whatever floats his boat, I guess,” she chuckled and turned back to the box. “I’ve packed a majority of our stuff, but I still need your help with the babies’ stuff. When you get a sec—are you okay?”

She noticed that Hyde wasn’t listening, but instead was sitting at the end of the bed, staring at the wall.

“Hmm? Yeah, I’m fine. Just thinkin’.”

“About?”

He let out a puff of air and scratched his neck. “About the move, the store…everything.”

Y/n suddenly knew where this was going. “Oh, no. Don’t you tell me you want to stay behind.”

“For the first time in my life I feel like I’m doing something right and have something going.”

She stood abruptly. “Are you serious?!”

“Y/n, please…”

“No, Steven! You expect me to leave while you get to stay here with our children?”

“No, I thought—”

“Oh, you thought I’d take them with me?”

“No! Y/n, I—” he sighed frustratingly before raking his hands down his face. “That’s not what I meant at all.”

“Then what did you mean?”

“I-I,” he stuttered, not knowing how to word this. “I’m just—I’m just saying that maybe, we stay for a little while so I can make sure the store is in good hands before we leave. Or..."

"Or?"

"Yeah, I stay behind."

“How can you say that?!” she exclaimed. “I’m over here busting my hump packing our boxes to move into our new apartment—the one that we applied for and got by the way—and thinking about how my husband and I can actually start our life instead of being tied down to such a small town where nothing ever happens, and now I’m being told that you don’t want to move with me? And split the family?!”

“No, no, that’s not what I want at all!” He quickly stood to meet his wife. “What I wanted to say was…”

Y/n quirked an eyebrow at him.

“…yeah, I want to stay here.”

“Are you kidding me?! Why?!”

“Because I just want to make sure that my business doesn’t go under!”

“If you were feeling this way, then why the hell did you sign an apartment lease with me?! How am I supposed to pay for rent now? I can’t afford that by myself!”

“Hey, you’re the one that decided to apply for out of state colleges without consulting me first!”

“Oh, so this is my fault?!”

“Yeah!”

“Wow,” she said darkly. If he didn’t know any better, he would think she was planning his demise, but he was too mad to care at the moment.

“Well, imagine my reaction when I found out you wanted to move to New York without telling me! You didn’t ask if I wanted to move, you just did it!”

“Because I didn’t think I’d get in! And I didn’t want to stress either of us out about getting into a school that wasn’t likely I was going to get in!”

“Yeah, that turned out well didn’t it?”

“How could you be so selfish?”

“Me?!” he shouted, now his blood boiling. “I’M being selfish?! You’re the one who is about to pack up and leave her family behind for some stupid dream of being a scientist!” The second it left his mouth, he wanted to chew his words back in, but the damage had already been done.

Shocked silence fell over Y/n. She stared at her husband with watery eyes, betrayal beating through her heart like needles. “Stupid, huh? Was it stupid when I supported you through when you met your real dad? Or when my dad kicked you out and I went with you, risking homelessness?! When I chose you even when my parents said not to? Not to mention when you dipped out on me for a few days when you found out I was pregnant! Please, Steven, tell me, when do I deserve to focus on my career goals instead of just standing on the sidelines, helping you achieve yours?” She yelled, crossing her arms.

Steven swallowed hard, regret thick in his throat. “I’m not saying that you can’t ever go after your dreams.”

“You just did.”

“No, I—”

She held up a hand, stopping him. “Don’t. I’m going to continue packing. Since it’s way too much for you to support my dreams and only yours, you can stay here. Me and the babies are going to New York.” She hiccupped, forcing her sobs down, but not before she let the tears burn her eyes and run down her cheeks. She forced herself to turn away from him and throw open her door.

“Y/n, no! Wait!” he called after her and ran after her as she stomped down the stairs, desperate to get away from him. “Please! Let me explain!”

“You’ve said enough!” she choked out and they crossed through living into the kitchen where Kitty was cooking meatloaf.

“No! Wait, baby, please!” He reached for her elbow to stop her.

She stopped but refused to look at him.

“Please don’t go,” he continued and grazed his hand down to hers, lacing his fingers through hers. “Let’s talk. Come on, doll.”

Tears continued to race down her grief-stricken face. “There’s nothing to talk about. You made your point.”

“No, that’s not what I—”

“I need to clear my head.”

“What? Y/n, come on, stay and let me—”

“Please, Steven,” she begged, her voice so soft, it broke Hyde’s heart. “Just leave me alone.”

The wobble in her voice made him let go of her hand, his own shaking. He nodded and stepped back. “Okay.”

Wiping her tears, she quickly stepped out the kitchen and out to the driveway. “Watch the twins in the meantime.” She shut the door before walking away.

“What happened?” Kitty asked gently.

“I messed up,” Hyde responded, his eyes glued to Y/n as she walked away. “And this time it’s bad.”

                                                            --Later—

Y/n found herself walking around Point Place for a while to clear her head—and to let the tears fall. She didn’t want to go back home with her face red and puffy. When she felt her face was dry enough, she walked herself over to The Hub. Thankfully, it was empty, except for Donna…who was shoveling ice cream into her mouth.

“Donna?”

She spun around with red, puffy eyes—much like Y/n’s. Concern immediately gnawed at Y/n who made her way over to Donna who had fresh tears running down her face.

She sat across from her and stared at her blotchy face. “Donna, what happened?”

Donna sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve. With a wobbly and broken voice, she said, “Eric broke up with me.”

Y/n’s eyes widened. “He WHAT?!”

“Yeah,” she sobbed and broke down crying again. “He said that this long distance is killing him and he can’t do anymore.”

Rage filled Y/n’s veins and for a moment she was thankful. “I’m going to kill that friggin’ idiot!”

“Why does he keep breaking up with me?”

“Because my brother thinks that…you see, the thing with Eric is…” Y/n couldn’t think of the words to help make this situation better or even make it sense. Her shoulders slumped in defeat. “I don’t know. He’s just stupid.

“Donna, I’m so sorry that he did that to you. You’re amazing and deserve better.”

“I know, what’s wrong with him?!” she continued to sob.

“I’ve been asking that question for nineteen years.”

That earned a wet chuckle out of Donna. “I’m sorry. I normally don’t cry in public, but I didn’t want to be near my dad. He will try to cheer me up by telling me jokes and…his jokes aren’t good.”

“On the bright side, at least he’ll distract you for a little bit,” Y/n said, which made them both erupt into light giggles.

“Yeah, he’s really good about that. I mean, I called my mom crying…again. She said that with how many times me and Eric have broken up that I should find someone who isn’t going to give me emotional whiplash.”

“Wow, she said that? I’m impressed.”

“Yeah, but then she asked me how many coconuts do we need to make coconut water, so…”

“And there we go,” Y/n laughed and rubbed her eyes.

That made Donna really see her eyes, too. “Were you crying, too?”

Fresh tears filled the brim of her eyes before screwing her eyes shut to prevent them from falling, but failed as they escaped down her cheeks.

“Oh, my God, what happened?”

Y/n had to take a deep breath to steady her voice. “S-Steven doesn’t want to move to New York anymore.”

“What?!”

She wiped her face once more and sniffed. “He said that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to leave his business behind and then called my dream of becoming a scientist stupid.”

Now it was Donna’s turn to be filled with rage. “I’m going to kill him.” She stood abruptly from her chair, causing it to screech against the floor. “Where is he? Is he at home? I’ll drag his ass out the door by his ‘fro and kick his ass!”

“No, Donna, it’s fine,” Y/n called after her.

“No, Y/n, it’s not!” Donna argued. “He made a promise that he would and now he’s going back on his word? No, that’s not right!”

“I know, Donna, I know,” she sniffled. “We’re just going to have to work something out. Maybe I can drop out and just go to the university in Milwaukee or something.”

Donna sat back down to face her best friend. “Is that what you really want?”

She shook her head, fighting back tears. “No, but I love Steven and care more about my marriage.”

“No, you go to New York and Steven goes with you because that’s what a good spouse does. He can’t expect you to always give up on your dreams so he can follow his.”

“Donna, he called my dream stupid,” Y/n whined and burst into tears again.

Donna swore she could feel the boiling hot rage course through her. “I’ll be right back.”

Before Y/n could stop her, Donna had practically sprinted out the building, bursting through the doors.

                                               

“So, then, I said to her, ‘Ma’am, there’s nothing in the back. I promise you, if we had anymore Bee Gee albums, it’d be here on the floor,’” Randy explained to Steven as they sat alone in the record store.

“What did she say after that?” Steven asked, leaning against the counter.

“Well, after I calmed her down, I said—”

“HYDE!” Donna screamed as she threw open the doors. “What the HELL is wrong with you?!”

Steven blinked at her. “Well, I assume a lot of things, but the big one I think is—”

“SHUT UP,” she screamed, causing him to immediately shut his mouth. Her outburst threw Hyde for a loop. “How could you say that to Y/n?!”

It dawned on him. “Oh, you heard about that.”

“Yeah,” Donna mocked him. “Mind telling me why you called her dream stupid and now refuse to move to New York with her?”

“Dude, you’re moving to New York? Does this mean I get to run the store by myself?” Randy asked, hopeful.

“Zip it, Farrah Fawcett!” Donna snapped and turned back to Hyde. “Care to explain yourself?”

“Okay, first off, I don’t know why you’re being so pissy, so whatever is causing it, it’s not my fault so knock it off,” Hyde warned, already fed up. “And second, this isn’t your business, so butt out.”

“Oh, it is when she comes to me bawling her eyes out because her husband is a complete tool!”

His face softened at the mention of Y/n crying. “Look, Donna, this is a complicated situation that’s between husband and wife. I’m still trying to figure things out.”

“No,” she said sternly, still pissed off. “You don’t get to suddenly act like you’re the victim when you might as well punched your wife in the gut.”

“Okay…I’m going to go on my lunch break now,” Randy said awkwardly and made his way out the door.

“What you said was really, really low,” Donna continued, staring daggers into him. “You need to apologize to her now. Especially if you want to keep her as your wife.”

“What about me, Donna?!” he asked angrily. “Not once has anyone ever asked me what I wanted! She didn’t even tell me she was applying! Imagine my surprise when an acceptance letter came in the mail and she up and said we’re moving to New York. Never mind a conversation about what I’m going to do with my career if we move out of state. She just expected me to drop everything for her and her future! So, excuse me for not being supportive!”

“Wait, she didn’t say anything to you about it?”

“No, Donna! I didn’t know she even applied for out of state!”

Donna was silent for a moment before her eyes reached Hyde’s. “Excuse me.”

Before he could respond, she was out the door.

                                                --Later—

“Of course I told him!” Y/n defended as she continued to pack. “He just never remembers! I have to repeat myself ten times to that bonehead for him to finally listen!” She threw the last of the shoes into the box, frustrated. “It’s from all that circle time all these years!”

“I don’t know, Y/n, he seemed really upset,” Donna said as she sat on the bed.

“Well, I’m not giving up this opportunity,” she said stubbornly. “I finally have something going for me instead of just being someone’s wife or mother. I want to be something more. I deserve to be more!”

“I know, but did you ever stop to think that he has something going on for him? Remember growing up all he thought he wasn’t going to do much with his life because no one in his family did? Let alone, support him? He finally has a career that he’s good at. Did you even say anything to him about wanting to apply out of state?”

Y/n’s movements stuttered for a moment, but continued packing. “No, I didn’t want to upset him if I didn’t get in.”

“Well, that worked out well didn’t it?”

“Look, Donna, I don’t need judgement from anyone right now.”

“If you had talked to him than maybe he’d be willing to move.”

Frustrated, she shut the box and kicked it aside. “He degraded my career choice, okay? I can expect from literally everyone else, but my own husband?!”

“I know, and I’m sure he feels terrible about that, but you’re not in the right either.”

“Are you seriously taking his side?!”

“I’m not taking either sides, Y/n!” Donna defended. “I’m just saying that he’s upset for a very valid reason! You guys need to sit down and talk.”

“Oh, he said all he needed to say.”

“Try again when you’re not mad,” Donna said and stood. “I gotta go. I have a date.”

Y/n scrunched her eyebrows at her. “Already?”

“Yeah,” Donna replied casually. “A carton of ice cream and some trash tv.”

“I’d offer to join you, but I know I’m not good company right now.”

“That’s okay,” she said and rubbed Y/n’s shoulder. “I think I’d rather be alone right now. I need to figure things out anyway.”

Y/n nodded. “No problem. You know where to find me if you change your mind.”

She nodded at her best friend. “I know.” She turned on her heel and walked out, leaving Y/n alone.

Y/n had been rage packing for hours that she hadn’t noticed she was sweating. She walked across the hall to the twins’ room and peered inside to see them still sleeping. Quietly backing away, she made her way to the shower, allowing the hot water to wash away the day’s stress and heartache.

While she let the hot water roll down her body, she heard the door open and quietly click closed. The curtain shower opened to reveal a naked Hyde and wordlessly hopped in the shower with her. He wrapped his arms around her torso and pulled her close, the water falling on his curls.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and kissed her shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”

Tears brimmed her eyes as she screwed them shut and sniffled. “I’m sorry, too. I should’ve told you.”

He nodded, agreeing with her. “Yeah, but I was way out of line for telling you your dream was stupid. Your dream isn’t stupid. It’s admirable and I love that you’re going into something that you actually love.”

“A little bit,” she agreed and turned to face him. “But I was wrong, too. I should’ve talked to you first. It’s not just about me anymore. It’s us. A family.”

He sighed. “This is what I was afraid of…”

Y/n’s face fell. “Afraid of what? Afraid of us?”

“No, I—” he sighed and set his forehead on her shoulder. “I—I, God, I stuck at this, I keep messing up. And I keep failing you.”

“Steven, look at me,” she said sternly and he lifted his head to meet her eyes. “You’re not failing me, alright? You’re pissing me off, there’s a difference. But out of everything that you’re doing, you’re not failing me.”

“Y/n, I can’t even be sure if I want to move to New York, how is that not failing you?”

“Because this whole thing is my fault. I don’t blame you.”

“Wait, can you say that again? I wanna get that on tape.”

“Shut up,” she giggled.

Hyde placed his finger under her chin. “Hey, I love you.”

“I love you,” she responded and leaned up to kiss him deeply. “What are we going to do though?”

“I think I can allow someone I trust to run the store. I mean, it’s not like I can’t call or fly out to see how it’s going. Maybe I can open another location while we’re there. New York needs some good music, too.”

“Are you sure? Look, I know how much this store means to you.”

“No, you’re my wife and there’s no way we should be apart.”

She quirked an eyebrow at him. “Are you sure you’re not just saying that so you can keep an eye on me to keep college boys away?”

“More like to keep you away.”

Her jaw dropped. “Steven!”

He chuckled. “What? You expect me to believe that you’re not going to leave me for some college preppy dillhole?”

“Yes,” she monotoned, but gently lifted a hand to his face. “Because I don’t know how many times I’m going to tell you, but I’ll tell you over and over again that you’re the only one I want.”

“Yeah? Well, what if some brainiac, scientist dude comes along?”

“Then I’ll have you kick his ass,” she said lovingly.

“Well, I haven’t kicked anyone’s ass in a while,” he pondered. “Could be refreshing.”

“You’re an idiot,” she laughed. Once her laughter calmed down, she looked back up at him with doe eyes. “So, are we okay?”

“Yeah,” he said and kissed her lightly. “We’re okay.”

She gave him a small smile before sighing. “We’ve still got a lot of packing to do. And I still need to get the keys for the apartment sent, call the moving company—"

“Why don’t we worry about that later? We’ve got some making up to do,” Steven said lowly.  

“But…we just did—oh,” she said, catching on to what he was saying.

“The babies are asleep, your parents are out—we’ve got the whole place to ourselves.”

“Well, I may have forgotten to tell you that the doctor cleared me and—”

She let out a yelp as Hyde attacked her lips and slammed her against the wall. Shivers went down her spine at the coolness of the tiles, bringing relief as the steam encompassed them, making it hotter than it already was. Their breaths and tongues mingled together, devouring each other. Hands were moving every inch of their bodies, eliciting moans and sighs from the other.

Slowly, she trailed her finger down his chest to where he needed her the most. A broken sigh exhaled from his lips as she started to pump her fist, feeling her arousal heighten by the sounds he was making. He didn’t want her to go without, so he brushed his fingers to her breasts and pinched a nipple between his forefinger and middle finger. He tugged and pinched, enjoying every little sound that he pulled out of her before leaning down and taking the unoccupied nipple into his mouth.

A soft moan escaped her lips, but that wasn’t enough for him. The hand that was busy teasing her breast, trailed its way down her body. She gasped when he ran a finger through her folds, already feeling her arousal.

“All wet already?” he growled, chuckling.

“Steven,” she whined, pulled him into a searing kiss by the neck.

Hyde hiked her leg over his hip before aligning himself. Before he did, he pulled away their breathtaking kiss and leaned his forehead against hers. “I’ve got a lot of making up to do.”

She nodded. “You do. But so do I.”

“I love you,” he breathed.

She smirked. “Prove it.”

“As you wish,” he whispered before grabbing her by the hips and pushed into her, making her sigh at the feeling and her eyes to roll to the back of her head. Stilling in his movement, he allowed her to adjust as he kissed down her neck.

“I missed you,” she whispered breathlessly.

“I missed you,” he repeated before pulling his hips back and snapping them against hers.

A gasp escaped her as she relished in the pleasure of feeling him again. Wanting to savor the feeling of her again, he moved slowly and achingly—but not gently. Six weeks. Six long weeks of no intimacy, he wanted—no needed—her more now than when they first got together. 

He held her hip in one hand and her hiked leg in another in bruising grips as he brutally slammed into her, nearly taking the breath out of her each time.

She let out high pitched moans each time, fighting to keep quiet in case the babies woke up or someone walked in. “More,” she demanded, breathlessly.

“Oh, I’ll give you more,” he growled that turned into a groan and captured her lips once more into a bruising kiss.

Moving her hands from his hair and neck, they traveled slowly down to his hips and tried to get them to move faster. A loud smack to her ass made her yelp and remove her hands.

“You’ll get it in a minute,” he said lowly in her ear. “I just want to feel you first.”

She leaned her head against the wall, her eyes fluttering closed at the sensation. “You’re killing me,” she said, huffing out at a laugh.

“You should see what you do to me,” he replied and let out a broken groan.

His words sent shivers down her spine, causing her to clench around him. He let out another strangled moan, making him pull out completely before slamming back into her aching center.

She let out a loud cry, but was quickly cut off by a harsh kiss to her lips. Another smack to her ass allowed her to open her legs wider to him.

“That’s it,” he praised. “Good girl.”

His words went straight to her core, making her wetter than the shower floor. She threaded her fingers into his hair and tugged. Letting out another guttural moan, he bit down on her neck harshly and pistoned his hips into her, hitting her sweet spot.

She moaned loudly, dragging her nails down his back with one hand and trying to find something to grip onto with the other. Her hand landed on the shower caddy and put so much pressure on it that snapped off the shower head.

“Be careful, Doll, we don’t want anyone to hear us in case they come home,” he warned her.

She tried to form a sentence, but all she could get out was garbled, “Nu-uh nuh.”

He chuckled darkly in her shoulder before removing his hand that was on her hip to her neck and brought her in for another searing kiss.

“God, you feel amazing,” he praised, his speed not letting up.

“I could—oh, God—say the same…about y-you,” she responded.

He began to pound into her hard enough that her body began slamming into the wall.

“Steven, I think I’m gonna—”

“Not yet,” he said and withdrew himself, setting her on her feet.

She whined and was about to protest, but he flipped her around to where her hands were planted onto the wall. He held her still in a firm grip as he made his way into her again.

“Oh, my God!” she screamed, the new angle making the sensation build up again. “S-Steven!”

Another smack to her ass cracked through the small room, making her swallow her own moans.

“Quiet,” he ordered. “You’re going to wake the babies.”

She bit her lip, struggling to stay silent while his harsh movements didn’t let up.

                                    Meanwhile…

Donna and Markus made their way up the Forman’s driveway before entering the kitchen.

“Thanks for hanging out with me tonight, man,” Markus said. “I know I dropped by unannounced, but I really appreciate you taking me out of the house.”

“Yeah, no problem,” Donna responded and opened the fridge for a soda. “Maybe I needed it, too. I mean, my ice cream started to taste a little salty from all the tears.”

Markus chuckled and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “I’m always here, too.”

She gave him a tight-lipped smile. “I appreciate it.”

“It can get lonely at times,” he said, subconsciously taking a step closer to her without his hand leaving her shoulder. “Break ups can make you feel that way and I just wanted to let you know that I’m here if you need a shoulder to cry on.”

Donna brought her hand to his as a friendly gesture, but instead their touch felt like electricity. Their eyes met for a brief moment, a spark flickering within them. “Same to you, Mark,” she breathed.

They both quickly looked away, clearing their throats, and withdrew their hands quickly.

“Want to see if Y/n and Hyde are free? I’m thinking we can all go see a movie or something,” she asked.

“Or maybe some circle time?” he offered.

She snapped her fingers at him, pointing a finger gun at him. “I like the way you think.”

They both entered the living room as they continued the conversation.

“It’s perfect because it’s Hyde’s favorite pass time and it’ll be a great send off for Kelso—” Donna was interrupted by the sound of banging.

“What is that?” Markus asked.

“I don’t know,” she responded and strained her ears. She started to hear faint moaning. “Uh…”

His eyebrows furrowed. “What?”

“I think Hyde and Y/n made up.”

His face screwed up in disgust. “Ew.”

“Yeah...let’s get the hell of here,” she said and practically ran out of the house.

“Right behind ya,” he said, right on her tail.

                                    Later That Evening…

“Man…this feels good,” Hyde sighed as they sat in circle time.

“I know what also felt good for you earlier,” Markus giggled.

“What does that mean?” Y/n asked, completely sober. As much as she wanted to join them, she knew she couldn’t risk passing through her breast milk.

“We heard you guys, uh…making up earlier,” Donna said, giggling.

“You guys WHAT?!” Y/n exclaimed, making Hyde laugh. “Steven, this isn’t funny!”

“It is a little bit,” he responded.

“Ugh, this is so embarrassing!” she cried out, putting her face in her hands.

“At least we know you can give it to her good,” Kelso said, smiling dumbly.

“Shut up, Kelso!” Y/n snapped.

“That’s right,” Hyde said, cracking a smile and threw an arm around her shoulder.

“You guys make me want to drink myself into a coma,” Y/n grumbled.

“Hey, hey, to be fair, we had no idea that Hyde was into ass smacking and Y/n liked being called a ‘good girl,’’” Donna said, laughing.

“Oh, my God!” Y/n shrieked, her face turning a crimson red. Even Hyde was starting to feel his neck and ears heating up.

“I now know more about you two than I thought I ever would,” Markus said and smirked at them. “I didn’t know you were so dominant and demanding, Hyde.”

“Yeah, you guys were such freaks!” Kelso chimed in, laughing widely.

Hyde reached over and slammed his fist into Kelso’s shoulder.

“Ah!” Kelso yelped, holding his arm, then he laughed. “Man, am I gonna miss this!”

“Can we change the subject instead of talking about mine and Steven’s sex life, please?” Y/n begged.

“We could, but this is funnier,” Fez giggled, but flinched away when he saw Hyde raise his fist. “Or not.”

“So, where’s Jackie?” Donna asked, inhaling the sweet, green plant.

“I don’t know and quite frankly, I don’t care,” Markus responded, rubbing his red eyes. “I haven’t heard from her since we got back.”

“We, as in you and the stripper?” Y/n asked, trying not to judge.

“Look, man, I didn’t even know I married her, okay?” Markus said. “I honestly don’t want her anymore. She moved in with me and my family is so uncomfortable with her being there. The other day, she taught my mom how to seduce my dad with a strip tease.” He shivered at the memory. “I don’t even want to know what my mom did with that information.”

“Okay? Then get an annulment and send her back home to whoreville,” Fez responded and giggled before sighing. “Boy, do I want a whore.”

“Yeah, yeah, Fez, we’ve heard this a million times,” Hyde said and turned back to Markus. “So, tell me, what’s it like being married to a stripper?” He quickly changed his tone when he realized Y/n glaring at him. “Or, you know, whatever.”

She stared at her husband before whipping her head back to Markus. “Actually, yeah, do tell.”

“You guys are so perverted,” Markus laughed and propped the joint between his lips. “It’s weird and I can see the disappointment in my conservative parents’ eyes every time they look at me.”

“I know that feeling,” Y/n said and this time it was Hyde’s turn to glare at her. “C’mon, you were there. You know how that went. But, it’s great and they love you now!”

“Uh huh,” he hummed.

“Anyway, I’ve been trying to break up with her, but every time I try, she just suddenly just throws herself at me and it’s like, the best sex of my life,” Markus continued.

“Really? You should get checked out for crabs,” Hyde said nonchalantly and reached for the joint. He inhaled the plant and turned back to Y/n. “Are you sure you don’t want a hit?”

“I mean, I could, I would just have to pump and dump later,” she replied and took the joint from his hand. She put the joint to her lips and inhaled deeply. When she exhaled, she let out a long-exaggerated sigh. “Oh. My. God.”

“Good stuff, eh?” Hyde asked her and took the joint back from her.

“God, I missed this stuff,” she said and took the joint one more time, inhaling deeply. “I gotta do this more often.”

“What happened to ‘we are parents now and we can’t do this anymore?’” Hyde asked her, pitching his voice higher.

“Shut up, I don’t sound like that,” she giggled, starting to feel the effect. “And I changed my mind.”

“Man, this is the best night ever!” Kelso cried out. “I’m moving to Chicago to work as a security guard at a Playboy club, Y/n’s doing circle time again, Markus is married to stripper, and Donna’s been making eyes at him all night--just like high school. Except, it was Eric, not Markus. This is nice.”

“What?!” Donna cried out, exasperated. “I haven’t been making eyes at him at all!”

“Yeah, you are!” Kelso defended. “I see some spark between you. Just admit it!”

“Donna, you and my brother just broke up,” Y/n said, slightly disappointed.  

“I haven’t been making eyes at him!” Donna defended. “Besides, he’s not over Jackie and married to a stripper. I don’t want to get involved with that circus.”

“Oh, come on, it’s not even much of a circus,” Markus defended. “Jackie and I are done and I’m going to have Sam move out this week. I—”

Suddenly, the door opened.

“Markus, baby?” Sam asked, coming through the door.

“Sam? What’re you doing here?” he asked, standing up.

“IT’S THE STRIPPER!” Kelso shouted excitedly. “THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!”

“Shut up, Kelso,” Hyde snapped and smacked him upside the head.

Sam made eye contact with him and furrowed her eyebrows. “You look familiar. Have we met?”

Hyde’s eyes widened and quickly looked to his wife who was giving him the dirtiest look she has ever given him.

He quickly shook his head. “Nope. Never met you in my damn life.”

“Steven, what the hell does she mean by that?” Y/n seethed.

“I-I don’t know!” Steven panicked.

“Huh, you definitely look like someone I’d get with,” she said innocently.

“Can it, stripper!” Y/n shouted. “He’s married. Mine, not yours!”

She brought up her hands in defense. “Whoa, chill. I was just saying that—”

“Yeah, well, don’t,” Y/n said and turned to her husband and brought him down for a passionate, searing kiss. Hyde let out a surprised yelp but quickly melted into it as he placed his hands on her hips. When she pulled away, he chased her lips and pulled her in for another kiss.

“HEY!” Donna shouted, clapping her hands which caused the couple to pull apart. “Get a room!”

“Yeah!” Fez added on. “It gives me needs!”

“Steven, baby, let’s go upstairs to our bedroom,” Y/n purred and grabbed his hand, leading him upstairs. “I’m sure our children are asleep.”

“Alright, that’s enough,” Markus cut in sternly, rubbing his forehead. “That won’t be necessary.”

“Oh, thank God, I’m exhausted from earlier,” she sighed and plopped back down on the couch.

Markus shook his head and turned back to his wife. “Sam, you didn’t answer my question. Why are you here? Why aren’t you at home?”

“I’ve been looking for you,” she answered. “I wanted to make sure you weren’t hanging around…you-know-who.”

“Okay, Sam, listen,” Markus sighed. “I need you to go back home so we can talk.”

“About what, baby?”

He cringed internally. “About us. Just go and I’ll meet you there.”

She sighed, “Okay.”

As soon as the door shut, he turned back to the group. “I’m going to have to hide our valuables before I break the news to her.”

“You think she’s going to steal them?” Y/n asked, craning her neck to look up at him.

“Or break them,” he answered. “I don’t know who she is when she gets angry.”

“All I know is that she’s super hot!” Kelso said loudly.

“You want her? You can have her,” Markus deadpanned.

“You mean that?” Fez asked.

“Down, boy,” Y/n said, grabbing Fez by the shoulder and shoving him down onto the couch.

“She’s not a piece of meat, guys,” Donna said.

“But she’s a stripper,” Kelso added.

“She’s not an object to ogle at!” she fought.

“But she’s a stripper!” he said, louder.

“She’s a human being!” Donna yelled.

“BUT SHE’S A STRIPPER!” Kelso yelled back, louder.

“Okay, this can go on for a while,” Y/n said, and stood up. “I’m going to go because we still have to finish packing. “You guys…figure this out on your own.”

Hyde and Y/n trotted up the stairs as they listened to their friends bickering. When the door to the basement shut, and their friends’ voices had been muted completely, she turned to her husband. “I’m going to miss those guys as much as they bug me.”

“Yeah, I’m going to miss punching Kelso,” he responded, laughing.

As they entered the living room, the doorbell rang.

Y/n checked the clock as it read passed 9:00pm. “Who’s here at this hour?”

Hyde strolled over to the door and cautiously opened it. “Mom?”

“Edna?” Y/n asked in unison with Steven.

“What’re you doing here…again?” Hyde asked. “I thought I told you to stay out of our lives.”

“I know, but I have news for you.”

“That you’re leaving? Because that’d be the first,” he snarked. “Look, if you’re here to see the twins, they’re already asleep and we’re still in the middle of pack—”

“No, that’s not it,” she said, her voice quiet and solemn. Something that he’s never seen her before.

“Edna, what’s wrong?” Y/n asked, shuffling past Steven.

The dark brunette fought to keep the tears from resurfacing.

“Mom, what’s going on?” Steven asked, quieter. “Did you get evicted or something?”

“No,” she responded.

“Then what—”

“Bud is dead.”

Taglist: @not-shy-nanya @taysirene @maddieschampagneproblems @mdittyz123 @undead-sierra @random-thoughts-004 @lieswithoutfairytales @chloem4a1 @srhxpc @zhonglibxitch @leothesquishy @because-makeup @cinemadaydream @pokemonlover65 @t-stark35

[those70scomics]

Summary: Jackie changes Hyde's physical appearance while he’s passed-out drunk to save their relationship, only he doesn't know their relationship needs saving. Her big plan: entering them and their friends in a Brady Bunch lookalike contest in Las Vegas.

FFnet / A03

Note: Not a new story but a new summary that better describes the content. This is a fun and deep fic that I think some readers have missed out on due to the original summary being too vague.

grain

Colonial Blue Background Texture

Brady Bunch Character Frames Format (FREE USE)

[thestupidhelmet]

A6

AU T7S Where Kelso Doesn't Exist on the Show

This turned into an outline/first-draft hybrid of a fanfic I would call One Difference: Michael Kelso Doesn't Exist.

Quite a few twists. Lots of Zen. Plenty for the other characters, too.

Season 1

Jackie joins the basement gang because of Fez. Jackie enjoys his flattery and attention, but she hasn't promised him anything romantic or sexual. She also keeps her time in Eric's basement secret, acting like she doesn't know Fez, Donna, Eric, or Hyde while in school.

Hyde influences Eric to be more delinquent than he otherwise would be. Without Kelso as his partner in crime, Eric fills that role.

Eric gets into more trouble with both his parents because of his shenanigans with Hyde. Donna also finds Eric slightly hotter for his rebelliousness. In canon season seven, she tells Eric she thinks it's hot when he does naughty stuff.

Unfortunately for Eric, his parents don't agree. He doesn't get the Vista Cruiser, as he does in "That '70s Pilot" (1x01). They tell him that unless and until he acts responsible enough to have a car, he's not getting one from them.

Red's opinion about Hyde is also different. Instead of seeing Hyde as a good kid who's rough around the edges, he thinks Hyde's a danger to his son and tells Eric Hyde's no longer allowed in the house. He also tells Eric to let Hyde find another dumbass to get into trouble with.

Jackie wants to go to the junior prom so badly that she accepts Fez's invitation. Problem is that she's finding herself attracted to Hyde in spite of herself. Before Red banned him from the basement, regardless of how annoyed he is by Jackie, she's drawn to him.

Hyde is the only one who fights the guy (and his friends) who punched Eric unconscious in "Grandma's Dead" (1x23). Without Kelso there, Fez tries to help but is tossed aside and passes out.

Hyde gets more than a fat lip from that bar fight. He's bruised all over. He's allowed to go to Grandma Forman's funeral to support Eric (because of Kitty).

When Red sees Hyde, he assumes the worst about why Hyde's bruised and swollen. Eric tells Red what Hyde did for him, and that significantly changes Red's mind about Hyde.

Fez is confused as to why Jackie runs hot and cold with him. Hyde and Eric both answer that she's a nutbag and he should look for a girlfriend elsewhere. Donna, though, defends Jackie. They're friends now, and Jackie's helped Donna transition her friendship with Eric into a romance.

Fez decides to fight even harder for Jackie's love, and Hyde and Eric groan.

After Edna abandons Hyde, Red (without knowing yet what happened) lets Hyde join his for dinner three nights in one week. During these dinners, Red starts to understand that Hyde is a good boy who's rough around the edges. Kitty, who always liked Hyde, is grateful for how he stood up for her son.

Once Red and Kitty learn that Hyde's mom abandoned him, he allows Hyde to live with them on probationary status. Hyde has to cut out the nonsense and stop cutting classes.

Hyde excels at following Red's conditions, so much so that Eric becomes jealous. With Hyde no longer doing senseless stupid stunts, Eric decides to do a stunt of his own. He's got way more experience in it since Hyde essentially trained him in the art for eleven years.

Eric, who's earned the Vista Cruiser a third through the season, decides to take his mom's keys to the Toyota and find out how fast and far it can go on one tank of gas. Donna, Hyde, and Fez try to convince him not to.

Jackie is present for this moment, and she encourages Eric to go with his plan. This pisses off Donna and Hyde, but Fez finds it hot (despite not wanting Eric to do it).

Hyde tells Eric if he's gonna do something so stupid, Hyde better go with him.

Eric ends up swerving to avoid another car, but the Toyota's bumper falls off and the left taillight is busted. A good measure of paint has been scraped off.

When Red discovers what happened to his car, Hyde takes responsibility for it. Eric objects and says it's his fault. They fight over it, and Red fights internally with himself whether to blame Hyde and kick him out.

But, unlike Donna and Fez who have run off, Jackie steps in and says it was Eric's idea and that Hyde tried to stop him. She's a witness. She knows Hyde will be homeless if Hyde doesn't let Eric take responsibility, and then she'll lose access to him.

Red is relieved and disappointed. He makes Eric and Hyde work to pay off the car repairs. Rather than being upset by this punishment, Hyde feels more like part of the family.

Season 2

Fez tricks Jackie into a kiss during the movies. Once she realizes what he's doing, she stops him. With no Kelso to slug Fez, Jackie runs out of the theater.

Jackie tells Donna what happened and admits she liked the kiss. She's considering dating Fez in secret.Donna has two problems with this idea: one, Fez tricked her into a kiss, which doesn't set a good precedent for the start of a relationship; and two, Jackie shouldn't date Fez in secret. If Jackie has romantic feelings for him, she should be proud to date him and not let xenophobia -- or fear of others' xenophobia -- dictate how she lives her life.

Jackie says in this conversation that she's never had a boyfriend before and she's getting long in the tooth. It's time for her to start dating already. Fez is a terrible choice. "He worships me. He's great dancer, but ..."

Donna says, "He's foreign."

Jackie says, "No. I mean yes, but you're right that I shouldn't treat him like a dirty little secret. The problem is ... I love kissing, and Fez is good at it, but I'm not sure Fez is the one I want to kiss."

Donna, shocked and intrigued, says, "Is there someone else you want to kiss?"

Jackie becomes cagey, an obvious tell, and Donna calls her out on it: "There is someone you want to kiss! Who is it? Do I know him?"

Jackie, very uncomfortable, escapes the question by escaping the conversation (and Donna).

In the circle with Eric, Hyde, and Fez, Donna does her best to keep her mouth shut about Jackie. But Fez brings up how he kissed Jackie at the movies and that Jackie ran away afterward.

Eric and Hyde rag on Fez (and Jackie): "Why Jackie? I mean ... why Jackie?" "You found the Holy Grail, man -- the secret to gettin' Jackie to disappear."

Donna, unhappy about their burns, says, "Jackie liked the kiss, you jackasses -- " which makes Fez brighten -- "but she wants someone else to kiss her that way."

Fez, Hyde, and Eric: "Who?"

Donna: "I don't know. She wouldn't tell me."

Eric: "Oh, God -- that must mean it's one of us!"

Hyde: "Donna's hot. Wouldn't blame her."

Eric: "Not Donna. Us! You and me!"

Hyde: "No way, Forman. You make her sick, and she makes me sick. She wouldn't go after her best friend's boyfriend anyway."

Donna, Eric, and Fez: "How do you know that?"

Hyde: "Uh ... "

Donna (teasing, singing): "Hyde and Jackie sitting in ... in ... have you two ever sat in anything together?"

Fez (sad): "Only the remains of my heart."

Hyde: "Look, last winter at her ski cabin, she whined to me about wanting this guy Jake Bradley -- "

Eric: "The Jake Bradley? The Vikings quarterback?"

Hyde: "Yeah. But he's dating Kat Peterson, so that's never gonna happen."

Donna (remembering): "Right! And you tried to 'comfort' her by saying Jake wouldn't cheat on Kat with Pam Macy either, so Jackie's in good company.

Hyde (chuckling to himself): "That was a pretty good burn."

Donna: "You were a total jerk that weekend -- and not just to her."

Hyde: "Yup. I was. [Sincerely to Donna] Sorry, man. For all of it. No excuses. Just a reason: head was screwed up from my ma. Wouldn't want anyone to do to me what I did to you, and I'm glad we're still cool though I don't deserve it."

Donna's about to accept his apology, but Eric says, "What did you do to her?"

Fez (morose): "What I did to Jackie."

Eric (pissed and confused, to Hyde): "You kissed her in a movie theater in Alpine Valley?"

Donna and Hyde: "The ski cabin."

Hyde: "And she slapped me good. Too bad it didn't knock sense into my skull."

After this circle, Eric is uneasy about Hyde.

Laurie, bored, finds a sad Fez moping around the Forman driveway. She gets him to open up about Jackie's latest but as-yet unspoken romantic rejection of him. Laurie sees an opportunity to amuse herself.

Laurie: "You're a virgin, right?"

Fez: "Yes -- no! I have done it with many women. Like a stallion."

Laurie: "Mm-hmm. Care to prove it?"

Fez glances around. "Where?"

Laurie holds up the keys to her parents' Toyota and nods her head toward the car.

"B-b-but we could get caught!" Fez says.

"It'll be more fun that way," Laurie says and pulls Fez to the car.

A little later, Hyde goes to the driveway. The garage door is open. The Toyota is rocking. At first Hyde thinks the Formans are having sex, and he back away. Then Laurie screams, "Fez!" in passion (and in an attempt to get caught).

Hyde is more repulsed by the idea of Fez and Laurie screwing than the Formans and flees to The Hub.

At The Hub, Jackie is eating at a table alone. Hyde brings his tray of fries, a hot dog, and a soda to her table.

Jackie (suspicious and intrigued): "What do you want?"

Hyde: "You don't have to worry about Fez anymore."

Jackie: "Huh?"

Hyde: "Look, we all know he's been after you for months, but someone caught him in her web today. He's probably gonna stay there willingly, even if the spider sucks out his insides ... leavin' him a dried husk."

Jackie (annoyed): What are you talking about, Hyde?"

Hyde: "Spotted Laurie and Fez doing the backseat bossa nova."

Jackie: "Is that some kind of dance?"

Hyde (smirking): "Some kind. Doesn't require clothes. [To himself] Hope he's wearin' a condom."

Jackie (understanding): "HE'S HAVING SEX WITH LAURIE?"

Hyde winces at her shout. "You should be happy, man. Now that she's got Fez on his back, he'll get off yours."

Jackie: "I -- well -- who's gonna ... "

Hyde: "What?"

Jackie: "You'll just burn me if I tell you."

Hyde: "Likely. [Gently] You can still tell me."

Jackie: "It's just that ... I don't get a lot of attention at home, okay? And I have no boyfriend to lavish me with the adoration I totally deserve, so now that Fez'll be all over Laurie, I'm gonna be alone."

Hyde: "Not alone. Lonely."

Jackie: "What's the difference?"

Hyde: "Trust me; there's a difference."

Jackie stares at Hyde a moment. Then she says, "I do. I do trust you."

Hyde, realizing he made a big mistake, says, "I'm gonna take the rest of my lunch to-go." He stands up with his tray of food and leaves The Hub while Frank (the manager and cashier) yells at him about it. Hyde says, "I'll bring it back!" and hurries away outside.

Fez, exhilarated and a little scared by what happened between himself and Laurie, looks for someone to confide in. He wants someone who will react helpfully, so Eric's out. Hyde's at The Hub with Jackie, so Fez can't find him. Next door, however, is Donna.

Nervously, Fez relates to Donna that he just lost his virginity to Laurie. Donna's first reaction is disgust and shock, but she recovers and asks if he's okay. "And please tell me you used a condom."

Fez: "I don't know if I'm okay -- but yes, Pépé wore a coat. Laurie said I was all right, which is a synonym for *okay,* but did she really mean it? And the first-first time lasted five seconds. The second first time was eight minutes and -- "

Donna: "Spare me the second-by-second breakdown. Please. I want to know how you feel -- emotionally. Because, y'know, it's Laurie! And how did this even happen?"

Fez (laughing): "Oh, you silly virgins and you're silly questions. Sex-education in this country is very lacking. You see, women have -- "

Donna: "I know how sex works! I mean how did you and Laurie ... *why* did you and Laurie?"

Fez: "Oh. She was bored. I was heartbroken over Jackie, and now Fez is no longer a virgin. But what if Laurie just used me to burn Eric? Or if she'll never have sex with me again? Or if that will be my *only* time having sex? Because I liked it ... about four minutes into the second first time."

Donna wishes Hyde were the one Fez was talking to. She's very uncomfortable. She's also worried about how this situation will affect Fez and Eric. She says, "Laurie is always up to something. Whatever you do, even if it's having sex with her again, don't trust her. And don't mistake sex for love. They're totally not the same thing. And I think you should tell Eric right away. Like now."

Fez: "Wow. This is a lot to think about."

Donna: "I just don't want you or Eric to get hurt."

Donna supports Fez by being present in the basement when Fez tells Eric about Laurie. Eric has a negative reaction, and Donna tries to calm him down. Hyde enters the basement amid this bit of chaos.

Hyde: "So Forman knows Fez and Laurie did it, huh?"

Fez, Donna and Eric: "How do you know about that?"

Hyde: "I was there, man. In the driveway. Saw the Formans' Toyota rattling around. Once I spotted the cause, I was outta there."

Eric, hoping to find an ally, says to Hyde, "So what now? Laurie's not hanging out with us just 'cause she and Fez committed that abominable act."

Hyde (to Fez): "Whatever you do, whoever you do, is your business, man. Just don't make it ours, all right?"

Donna: "I already warned him not to fall in love with her."

Fez grows annoyed at his friends' controlling, unsupportive attitudes. He decides that if Laurie's interested in him, he'll have fun with her as long as it lasts.

Throughout the rest of the season, Fez and Laurie's strange relationship continues. Jackie's disgusted and thankful she'd realized she doesn't have romantic feelings for him early. Red is oblivious, but eagle-eyed Kitty recognizes that Laurie is "playing" with Fez (please excuse the unavoidable double entendre).

Kitty sits Laurie down and has a serious talk with her. Kitty knows Laurie is in no way faithful to Fez and doesn't want her to break Fez's heart. Laurie tries to reassure Kitty, albeit dismissively, that the heart isn't the organ Fez is concerned about.

Dissatisfied, Kitty goes to Red. Big mistake. Red puts the onus on Fez and tries to scare him off Laurie. Fez tells Laurie about this development, which makes her want Fez more.

Jackie tries to befriend Hyde, much to his annoyance. She likes how real he is, especially compared to the guys who are part of her social circle at school. She finds in his personality and demeanor aspects she feels she lacks within herself and is attracted (platonically) by that.

Hyde shows no interest in reciprocating any friendship until he witnesses at school a nasty encounter Jackie has with a very competitive cheer squad teammate, Julie. Julie is gunning for cheer captain for the varsity team next year. She sees Jackie as a threat and uses Jackie's lack of boyfriend as a way to spread rumors about her.

Hyde teaches Jackie his version of Zen so she can protect herself. He also introduces her to the circle in between lessons. Unfortunately, being Zen goes only so far when Jackie Burkhart is a lesbian (remember, 1970s) and other untrue statements about her are written on blackboards and whispered by students whenever Jackie walks into a classroom or a school hallway.

To mitigate these rumors, Jackie starts dating Chip. Hyde is wary of this development and keeps an eye on it.

Before Jackie and Chip's third date, at school Hyde questions Chip -- whom Hyde knows is a year older than Jackie and has bragged about previous sexual "conquests". Chip says what he and Jackie have is quid quo pro. Chip goes on a few dates with her, tolerates the yapping, and on the last date he gets to nail her.

Hyde: "Is tonight gonna be the last date?"

Chip: "Hell yeah. She's a bitch."

Pow!

Hyde lays out Chip with one punch. It's witnessed by a lot of students, including Jackie. Jackie wants to know what happened. Hyde manages to get out, "He said bitch. Last date. Nail you -- "

Unlike the Jackie of T7S Prime, this one is a virgin at this time on the show. She's sexually inexperienced, and she pieces together what Chip intended and why Hyde punched him.

Unfortunately, the school principal arrives. As he hauls Hyde to his office, Jackie shouts that she loves Hyde. Many students witness this moment, too.

The principal suspends Hyde from school for the rest of the year, which only has two weeks left, but it means he can't take his finals. He'll have to attend summer school and anger management classes.

Eric and Donna's stories in season 2 are relatively unaffected by Kelso's absence except as described above.

Season 3

Jackie happy-brags to Donna about what went down and why Hyde has to go to summer school. Donna thinks what Hyde did is noble but that Jackie needs to tell her dad about it since the principal doesn't know.

Jackie thinks Donna's idea is great. She does tell her father, who uses his influence to get Hyde out of anger management and a commendation on his transcript for community spirit-- despite the principal condemning the use of violence to solve issues. Chip is expelled because of Jack's influence (and fury that someone thought to hurt his daughter in such a way).

Hyde remains suspended for one week but is allowed to return to school to take his finals.

Jackie is flustered that Hyde doesn't thank her for her intervention on his behalf. He protected her, and she protected him, so -- to her mind -- they should be really close now.

When Jackie confronts Hyde about his lack of gratitude, he tells her he never would've had to punch the guy (Chip) if Jackie didn't give into social pressure. Although this statement is victim-blaming, Jackie does think hard about how toxic her social circle is and tells Hyde he's right. She'll choose her friends better. In fact, he'll be seeing a lot more of her from now on.

Hyde complains to Eric and Donna about this latest situation. Donna's pissed at Hyde for blaming Jackie for Chip nearly taking advantage of her.

Eric, meanwhile, is still focused on Fez and Laurie's relationship and says he bets Laurie took advantage of Laurie, but no one was around to punch her before she could get to him -- not that a man should punch a lady. But if Donna had been there ...

Donna slaps Eric's shoulder and tells him to pay attention to the matter at hand.

Hyde takes to heart Donna's point about victim-blaming Jackie and wants to make it right. He apologizes to Jackie, in his own way. He says, "I get feelin' pressured, and sometimes it puts us in situations we don't know are dangerous. Chip is a sneaky bastard, and you're not used to sneaky bastards. I am, but you couldn't have seen what he had planned for ya. Even if you could -- "

Jackie: "You're rambling, Steven."

Hyde: "I don't ... yeah, okay, I do. I am. Anyway, I'm sorry for acting like a dillhole after I punched Chip. I kinda punched you, too, with my words."

Jackie: "Yeah, you did. It really hurt ... and not only because I really like you."

Hyde: "You shouldn't -- like me, I mean. I'm no good. But under your abrasive, bossy exterior is someone I can stand to be around."

Jackie (touched): "Aw! Does this mean we're friends?"

Hyde: "I knocked a guy's teeth in 'cause he called you a bitch and planned to do a lot worse, and you had your dad bail me out of goin' to summer school and more. People who hate each other generally don't do things like that, so ... "

Jackie (excitedly, hugging Hyde): "We're friends! Hey, why don't we go to the Sizzler for dinner and celebrate?"

Hyde (uncomfortable): "I'm not sure we -- "

Jackie: "I'll pay."

Hyde (now agreeable): "You've had a rough couple of weeks. Let's go, kid."

Jackie and Hyde's arc in season three is their growing friendship that they manage to conceal from everyone but Mrs. Forman. She keeps it mostly to herself but talks to Red about it. Red approves because of his experience with her in "Career Day" (1x18).

Fez and Laurie's relationship ends when Fez discovers that Laurie's cheating on him. His friends say they all warned him but still display various levels of sympathy.

Donna says, "Why did you like her so much anyway? She was mean to you most of the time."

Fez: *She had sex with me, Donna. Regularly! How could I not love a woman like that?"

Hyde: "Dude, you didn't love her."

Fez: "I loved that she had sex with me. Regularly! And sometimes strangely, which I also enjoyed very much."

To help Fez get over Laurie, Hyde takes Fez "cruising for chicks". It cheers Fez up a little, but he's relatively down the rest of the season.

Eric never gets the idea of getting Donna a promise ring because Kelso doesn't exist to give it to him. Still, Ric and Donna's relationship goes downhill because of h increasing independence and his increasing insecurity.

At the end of the season, Eric has an important conversation with Donna. He says, "When do you think we'll get married? Before college or after college?"

Donna (laughing, thinking he's joking): "Why not tomorrow? We could drive to Vegas, and an Elvis impersonator can officiate."

Eric: "I'm serious. Donna, I can't imagine my life without you."

Donna (stunned): "Are you, like, proposing?"

Eric: "Hypothetically if I were, what would you say?"

Donna: "I'd say, 'We're seventeen and have no idea where our lives will take us.'"

Eric: "But wherever they take us, you see us together ... don't you?"

This question leads to the rest of their breakup scene in "Promise Ring" -- minus the actual ring.

Season 4

Eric's depression proceeds as it does on the show. For the first half of the season, he dates random girls. Donna doesn't date.

The heartbroken Eric and Fez set up the get-Hyde-a-girlfriend party. Jackie invites Rhonda -- not because Jackie's insecure about not being the prettiest girl at the party but doesn't want to find Hyde a potential girlfriend. Fez and Rhonda hit it off.

With no Kelso and no vanity-driven insecurity, Jackie stays at the party and watches Hyde closely but sneakily. She's relieved when he doesn't seem seriously interested in any of the girls.

After a short absence, Hyde returns to the party with Melissa. Jackie recognizes how disrespectful and manipulatively Melissa treats Hyde. Once Melissa leaves, Jackie pulls Hyde aside.

Jackie: "Melissa's really pretty."

Hyde (still dazed by his attraction to Melissa): "Uh-huh ... "

Jackie: "She's also everything you hate about me."

Hyde: "What?"

Jackie: "You clearly didn't pay attention to how she acted. She was bossy, mean, and -- and -- what's that word you taught me, when you described how your mom used to give you the silent treatment whenever you pissed her off by blinking too loud?"

Hyde: "Withholding."

Jackie: "That's it! She's emotionally withholding, and she's gonna use that as a weapon against you if you date her. I can see it already."

Hyde (annoyed): "Jackie, I spent an hour with her. You can't tell all that."

Jackie: "You had one conversation with Chip, and you knew exactly what he had planned for me."

Hyde: "Because he told me!"

Jackie: "And Melissa told me. I might not have your sexual experience or whatever, but I'm an expert in manipulation. ... Just think about what happened between you two tonight before you call her, okay?"

Hyde (mostly because he wants to end the conversation): "... Okay."

But Hyde does as Jackie asks. He flashes back to how his mom treated his dad (Bud) and eventually himself. Melissa did seem to resent him already, and he'd end up resenting her. She might be a great girl -- but not for him. She clearly doesn't think he's enough for her as he is now. Not a great way to start a relationship.

At The Hub a few days later, Donna tells Hyde that Melissa told her he never called. Donna asks why.

Hyde: "You called me whipped after she left the party. That was enough."

Donna: "Oh, come on, Hyde. I was teasing. Melissa's really cool. You're cool. I don't think you should miss out on each other."

Hyde: "And I don't think you and Forman should've broken up. You obviously miss each other, but what can I do about it?"

Hyde hit the target he was aiming for. Donna, emotional and pissed, leaves The Hub.

Jackie arrives at The Hub and passes Donna, who says, "Hyde's being a jackass today. I wouldn't sit with him."

Jackie does sit with Hyde, however, and she gets him to spill about not calling Melissa and his interaction with Donna.

"Thanks, by the way, for lookin' out for me," he says.

Jackie: "That's what friends do even when it might piss their friend off like you did Donna."

Hyde: "She'll get over it. Don't know how she and Forman'll get over each other, though."

"Tornado Prom" (4x15) happens a few episodes earlier in this AU. Jackie really wants to win Snow Queen, but she laments to Hyde that she has no date. Hyde shrugs. Jackie says, "You could take me."

Hyde: "I could, but I won't. Plan on partying in the principal's office."

Jackie: "You can still do that. But if you're my date, the teacher-chaperones won't be as watchful of you."

Hyde: "Huh. ... All right. I owe you for Melissa -- and I hate owing anyone -- but no dancing."

Jackie: "Five dances, and you wear a tuxedo."

Hyde: "No dances, and I wear a shirt and pants."

Jackie: "Steven!"

Hyde: "Whatever. One dance."

Jackie: "Four and a tux. I'll rent it."

Hyde: "Two dances, and I wear the suit Bud left me after he -- well, left me the first time."

Jackie: "That mustard thing? Ew! ... Three dances, a nice suit jacket, pants, dress shirt, and tie I'll buy you, and I distract any teachers who might be eyeing you."

Hyde: "Deal."

During his dances with Jackie at Snow Prom, Hyde begins to realize his romantic, aesthetic, and sexual attraction to Jackie. It scares him. After their third dance, he definitely wants to have his circle in the principal's office. Jackie joins him with Fez and Rhonda.

Jackie falls asleep. Hyde draws a unibrow on her forehead. She wins Snow Queen, and Jake Bradley wins Snow King. Jackie is elated but can't understand why everyone in the gym is laughing at her. Then she sees her face in a mirror and knows Hyde is the culprit.

Jackie is furious, but instead of letting humiliation get the best of her, she goes Zen. Everyone is impressed, including Hyde -- and he knows now he's in big trouble.

After "Tornado Prom," Eric realizes he'll never get over Donna if he doesn't actually try. Without Jackie setting Donna up with Casey Kelso, Eric's able to focus on his own date life. He asks out Shelly ("Eric's Panties" [3x06], who is happy to go out with him.

Donna's emotional spiraling begins again. She doesn't want to date anyone, but she's afraid Eric and Shelly might actually have a chance at a relationship (unlike his previous dates).

Jackie (to Donna): "Oh, my God, you still love him!"

Donna: "Of course I do, but that doesn't mean I can be with him. He tried to control my life."

Jackie: "No, he confessed his undying commitment to you, and you rejected it."

Donna: "Because the second I carved out a little piece of my life just for myself, he freaked!"

Jackie: "Someone who loves you as much as Eric does would be willing to work through that."

Donna: "How do you know? You've never even had a boyfriend."

Jackie: "No, but I understand love and that it takes compromises and work ... and trust."

Donna: "Then I guess I don't trust Eric to work on compromising with me."

Jackie: "He compromised with you all the time!"

Donna: "I compromised with him. Until I was sick of him refusing to respect me enough to do the same."

Jackie: "Have you ever told him that?"

Donna: "I told him to trust me."

Jackie: "That's not the same thing."

Donna: "It should've been enough."

Jackie: "Obviously, it wasn't."

Donna: "Well, that's not my problem."

Jackie (mockingly): "'That's not my problem.'" [She pinches Donna's arm, and Donna cries out in pain and anger.] "Who's problem is it, then? Eric's, someone who Shelly or another girl might give a chance to let him learn from his mistakes and be happy? Or the person so stubborn she'll end up alone and miserable because she's in love with someone who needs more time to understand what he's doing wrong?"

Donna can't absorb Jackie's insight all at once, but the seed is planted.

Jackie's parents find out that Hyde took Jackie to Snow Prom. They think she's dating him, despite her protestations to the contrary: "We're just friends! He'll tell you the same thing!"

Jackie's parents want her to stop hanging out in the Formans' basement. She can go to Donna's house, but if she keeps going to the Formans', her father will cut her off financially.

Jackie has more than Hyde to lose. Despite that Donna doesn't go to the basement as often, especially now that Eric's dating Shelly, Jackie will miss all her friends there.

In the basement, Jackie announces her conundrum without saying that Hyde's the reason for it. She says her dad wants her to spend more of her spare time with her "real" friends from the cheer squad and in her own grade. She's decided, though, to get a job because she knows everyone here will miss her too much.

Eric, Donna, Fez, Rhonda, and Hyde's reactions are unenthusiastic. But in private, Hyde asks Jackie what the actual deal is.

Jackie, to her surprise, admits the truth. Hyde laughs and says, "That's ridiculous. Your folks are ... "

Jackie: "Ridiculous! I know! You'd never like me that way."

Hyde: "Right. Never. And you wouldn't date a poor, lowerclass burnout dirtbag."

Jackie: "Exactly! Not that you're a dirtbag ... or poor in the non-money sense. You're richer in every other way that counts compared to the sons of my parents' upperclass friends."

Hyde (sensing the awkwardness between them): "So you're getting a job, huh?"

Jackie: "I'm going to the mall. Maybe Halverson's is look for someone pretty to model its clothes."

Jackie ends up at the Cheese Palace, hired to hand out cheese samples to potential patrons. She has to take the bus to the mall and back because her dad took away her keys to the Lincoln.

Hyde feels partially responsible for Jackie's situation, so he drives her home from work when his own work schedule allows.

Eric catches Todd "the Cheese Guy" kissing Jackie (Todd had tricked her when she was down about her parents' lack of trust in her and low opinion of Hyde).

Jackie doesn't want Eric telling anyone because she's humiliated that her second real kiss was due to being tricked by another boy. Moved by compassion, Eric keeps her secret.

Except that Jackie feels like she cheated on Hyde in some way.

By the end of the season, Fez doesn't get terrible advice from Casey Kelso, and his relationship with Rhonda is intact.

Donna has grown completely depressed. She refuses to try to break up Eric and Shelly by telling Eric she loves him. She had her chance to work through the toughest part of her relationship with Eric, and they both blew it. She needs to get away for the summer, and she heads to the bus station -- and California -- to stay with her mom.

What Donna doesn't know is that Eric has broken up with Shelly. He's still in love with Donna, and he can accept living in the now with her and leave the future unwritten.

Jackie tells Hyde about what happened with Todd. Hyde says she doesn't need to confess to him. He's no priest.

Jackie: "I do. I feel terrible about it, Steven. He tricked me!"

Hyde (growing protective): "What do you mean by tricked?"

Jackie: "He offered to give !e a sympathetic hug because of my parents, you know? But he turned his face, and his lips pushed against mine, and we were kissing. I was so confused, but I kissed him back! Just like I was confused when Fez tricked me at the movies and kissed me -- and I kissed him back."

Jackie (tearing up): "My teammates are right about me: I'm a naive loser. God, I've never been kissed by a boy I've chosen to kiss. Who I've wanted to kiss. And -- and if you hadn't looked out for me another boy, Chip, might've done a lot worse."

Hyde (consoling): "Hey ... hey, that sucks. But it's not your fault, all right? I didn't get to choose most things about my life, either, but I got to choose my friends. Like you."

Jackie feels a little better, but her first tear falls.

Hyde: "Listen, any guy you choose to kiss someday will be lucky."

Jackie: "Any guy?"

Hyde: "Well, someone who wants to kiss you back."

Jackie: "Would you want to?"

Hyde (flushing a little): "If you kissed me ... it would be cool."

Jackie: "That can mean anything!"

Hyde: "I wouldn't hate it. ... Hell, I'd probably like it."

Jackie places her hand on Hyde's cheek. She kisses him gently. He responds gently -- at first -- then they're making out with each other heavily. Fade to black.

Eric goes to the Pinciottis' house to tell Donna about his breakup and what he's learned about trusting the moment. Unfortunately, Donna's not there. Bob and Joanne don't know where she is. They let Eric wait for her in her room. He waits a long time.

Season 5

Jackie and Hyde's romantic relationship develops over the summer. They keep it a secret because Eric is sad and mopey about Donna. They also want the relationship to be just theirs while in its beginning stages, without their friends' opinions.

Hyde gets Eric the plane ticket (using Eric's Candy Land stash) to go to Donna in California. Hyde and Fez cover for his absence.

Eric and Donna reconcile in California. Without Casey being an issue, and Eric explaining that he dumped Shelly and never had sex with her because he never stopped loving Donna, they actually deal with what broke them up.

When Fez and Rhonda catch Hyde and Jackie in the basement post-kissing -- unlike Fez -- Rhonda recognizes what they walked in on. Hyde decides to act Zen about it. Jackie follows his lead.

Rhonda: "That doesn't work on me. I know love when I see it."

Hyde (laughing nervously): "Love? I don't love, man. I tolerate."

Jackie: "No, no, no. I tolerate. You're so overwhelmed by my beauty that I tolerate making out with you."

Fez (to Rhonda): What are they doing?

Rhonda: "Acting like two in love dorks. Want to see if Mrs. Forman has any peach cobbler left over?"

Fez: "I suppose I could tolerate that."

With Rhonda and Fez gone, Jackie says, "Steven, are we dorks?"

Hyde: "Nope."

Jackie: "Are we ... in love?"

Hyde: "How's about we quit talking and get back to what we were doin'?"

Jackie and Hyde continue to make out but wonder about Jackie's question.

Donna and Eric return from California.

Without Kelso, Jackie and Hyde's arc consists of figuring out just how they feel about each other, supporting each other through life issues (e.g., Jackie's dad going to prison) and not always getting it right the first or second time.

Eric and Donna don't get engaged this season. They're too busy finding the balance between their fears, individual desires, and how all that affects their relationship.

During the senior prank, Eric, Fez, and Hyde are present. Eric tried to get artistic and paint a tribute to Donna. He miscalculated his reach and fell off the water tower. Hyde leaves Fez to check on Eric. Fez is arrested.

Jackie is afraid to admit to Hyde she loves him. Hyde is afraid he's unlovable, but Kitty reassures him and says, "Maybe Jackie has to hear it first."

Hyde: "And if she laughs in my face?"

Kitty: "Steven, you've loved that girl for years. You can deny it all you like, but a mother knows. And if you've chosen someone worthy of your love, which I believe you have, you'll hear the right thing."

Jackie, meanwhile, has gone to Red -- who doesn't want to get involved but does. Jackie says, "When did you first tell Mrs. Forman you love her?"

Red: "Between when I fought in World War II and the Korean War."

Jackie, despite knowing Hyde would never join the military and dislikes conflict of any kind, decides she'll have to take drastic action.

Jackie finds Hyde in the Formans' basement. She says she's declaring war on him.

Hyde, confused since he and Jackie haven't had any serious fights in a while, says, "Before you do that -- whatever that means -- I've got somethin' to tell you."

Jackie wants to speak first, but she's learned that she has a tiny window when Hyde is open and vulnerable enough to say important things to her. She doesn't want him to shut down, so she gestures her assent.

Hyde: "I love you. ... Okay, go declare war."

Jackie, taken a back says, "I -- I ... I admit defeat. I love you, too!"

Hyde (unsure): "You what?"

Jackie: "Mr. Forman went through one war and was about to fight in another when he told Mrs. Forman he loves her. So I thought if I declared war by telling you I love you that either we'd both win or both lose. I just needed a definitive answer."

Hyde (laughing): "You are one freaky, freaky chick. Glad we both won. Medical care for vets in this country, 'specially mental care, sucks. Have you seen that guy on Sherman? He -- "

Jackie quiets him with a kiss. "Another time, Steven. This war is over."

Hyde kisses her back.

Rhonda marries Fez so he can stay in the country. Red doesn't have a heart attack.

Eric, inspired by Fez and Rhonda, proposes to Donna at the end of the season. We don't get her answer.

Season 6

Kitty is devastated that Eric and Hyde are leaving for college. Eric says, "It's in Kenosha. We'll be less than forty-five minutes away."

As in The Middle, we get the characters' college experiences, but they're in Point Place for the majority of episodes.

We learn that Donna said yes to Eric's proposal by seeing the engagement ring on her finger. Their arcs revolve around keeping their engagement secret, accidentally revealing it, and their parents' reactions on top of dealing with college life and sharing a house with Hyde, Fez, and Rhonda off-campus.

With Donna out of the house, Bob spends his fatherly attention on Jackie. It's helpful and annoying, and then her mom returns to town. The conflict this arrival creates is handled more seriously than it is on the show with Kelso.

Hyde struggles in college. He's smart but not academically inclined. His temperament is much better suited to an apprenticeship, learning a craft by doing the craft. He's scared.

During one weekend, Hyde learns Hyde bought Wilson & Son's Muffler Shop. He asks Red if he can work there on the weekends. Red hears the uncertainty in Hyde's voice and gets the truth out of him.

Hyde says he doesn't want to disappoint him or Mrs. Forman after all they've done for him.

Red says part of being an adult is making one's own path. Red will hire Hyde full-time if that's what Hyde wants. Hyde agrees.

Hyde then has to go through the process of telling everyone else. Mrs. Forman is worried but trusts Red to teach Hyde well -- and is happy he'll be moving back into the house.

Jackie is shocked, but she ultimately supports Hyde in his decision. She's also happy he'll be next door instead of forty minutes away.

Eric, Donna, and Fez are not happy, especially Eric. He's afraid Hyde will end up like one of his cousins. But Donna says Red owns a muffler and car repair business, not a gas station. If Hyde's happier, then he needs to make this change for himself.

Once Red and Kitty learn of Donna's engagement, they try to stop it. Shenanigans enue for a few episodes until Eric and Donna finally get the chance to tell them that the marriage won't take place until after college, which they're in.

Rhonda learns she's pregnant at the end of the season.

Hyde receives a letter in the mail from someone who claims to be his sister.

Season 7

Part of Hyde's arc is learning about his biological father and that side of the family. He's been working for Red for eight months, but W.B. works in music, and that's Hyde's true calling. Red lets Hyde go from the muffler shop.

Fez and Rhonda deal with Rhonda's pregnancy while going to college.

Donna gets the opportunity to study abroad in Paris for her junior year. Eric wants to go with her, and he applies for the same opportunity. Odds are against him, but he studies hard, inadvertently distancing himself from Donna she doesn't know why.

Near the end of the season, Eric learns he's accepted. Donna finally understands and wishes he'd told her. He didn't because he didn't want to get either of their hopes up.

Jackie is accepted togoing to NYU in New York City. She's torn because Hyde manages Grooves in Point Place. W.B., though, just happens to be expanding his business into the Northeast. Hyde will run the giant, new flagship store with Angie's help.

Rhonda has the baby. It's a girl, ten pounds, eight ounces. Fez is a proud papa.

Red and Kitty face the fact they'll truly be empty nesters. "Until Eric's senior year," Red says, "when he and Donna will be back in Wisconsin."

The show ends with the Vista Cruiser driving away. We see the license plate, and Hyde shouts (unseen): "Goodbye, Wisconsin!"

Jukebox Ask Game