#sebastian cotard

[galactic-mayhem]

messing around with a cover for an OC story. my previous attempt at a webnovel sucked but I think I've learned enough about How Not To Write A Story (tm) that if I tried again it probably wouldn't suck. also helps that I'm not writing for a grade anymore. have some doodles of canon characters and potential characters too i'm feelin generous

[iliadicjasontodd]

Do you have any Jason AO3 fic recommendations? Or just DC AO3 fic recommendations in general?

Hello! Hi, yes I do.

So, of course, anything by yutro @boyfridged, first of all, such as paint it over, black out days, & leave no trace, but genuinely all of their work is incredible. They understand Jason on a fundamental level- though to say he understands only Jason that deeply would do him and his writing which is so, so skilled, a disservice :))

the clay steals the clay by zipadeea is beautiful.

I'm sure you're familiar with it, but PLUTO. by orpheusaki @damianbugs is, imo, a classic. It recalls some of the feeling of some of the best parts of Countdown for me, for obvious reasons.

all of ceramicheart's (who I'm not certain would want me linking his tumblr blog!) work also- in particular redshift, but all of that series and, like I said, I love all of her work. ultimate Kyle Rayner understander & beautiful writer.

What the Living Do, Anonymous, is one of my favourite fics, esp as someone trying to give Jason Cotard's Delusion at every possible occasion.

last word WISDOM better get some even too late by Esmenet is one of my favourite fics point-blank. the Anne Carson of it all...

Get Used to Dying, by papered_king is one I always associate with the above, stylistically also! Love the meta of this, love theatre as horror.

a second darkness by vlnlr @batphobique. This absolutely blew me away, and the script format was, personally, a major bonus. I will probably be reading this over and over again.

mushrooms at sunrise by bleepbloopskoodlebop & Amble On (and your friends will surely find you) by Nightsrk both feature Jason dealing with schizophrenia, and I am very, very fond of both.

the Emergency Line series by crucifixinhell

i am what i am by luuma.

dirt by sunspikes. It's horror to me.

Time Loop fic! Ad Infinitum; Modified by familiarities (twistsandturns)

The Cold Like Coming Home by cabezas_de_vaca.

Smashing Tail Lights by CunningCrow @redactedcrow. I have read this about 5 times. I am still (very patiently) waiting for part two. It was, I think, the fic I read directly after reading Lost Days for the first time.

Apollo by sparkypants. the horror of never letting go!!! the horror of bruce wayne specifically never letting anything go!!!

Incomplete, but which came first (the robin or the grave) by figofswords @figofswords. Two years on I'm still hoping for more but it's very good as is as well!

do you listen to the girl in red, white, and blue? by ThatSpicySeaFlapFlap. Stephanie Brown girl of all time Stephanie Brown

Trapped by lurkinglurkerwholurks. I must have read it about 15 times whenever I'm feeling anxious. Because something is wrong with me.

Song of the Insensible by Jade_green.

The Whale by chucklesbuckles if you want some very terrifying Jason, & Get Joker by them (featuring maybe one of the only Harley Quinn depictions in a fanfic I've found compelling, not that I know her well) also!

Your reflection, your bitter deception & dust in my mind by KangaRou.

Bloodstains Won't Make It Matter by skylarkblue.

This is orphaned, but The Last Laugh.

Enough by Lunette3002.

Batman Kills the Joker by DragonflyxParodies & Palimpsest by cabezas_de_vaca both take interesting metatextual approaches to killing that stupid clown.

You're No Hero to this Story, Just Another Wretched Pawn by EventualToast. The way this is written is so genuinely unmooring and perturbing; it feels very authentically like derealisation and the true experience of profound horror despite most of that being magic.

To My Brother by a_silly_gander, I’d feel less like St. Sebastian if you’d stop searching for another arrow by worthy_willow, i know (do you know?) by cuephrase, imperfections can be nice by mikkal, Where You Perfectly Stand by cherrysour, what's in your head? by sinistercacophany @sinistercacophony (also has very good aftg fics, as an andrew enjoyer I come back to their work often), . I am at heart just sentimental about Dick & Jason.

the prophetic spring by yellow_caballero @yellowocaballero. I need you to understand I barely ever approve of Reverse Robin AUs. It's a thing. I talked about it extensively. I don't even care about or actively dislike a lot of the characters this au focuses on but it doesn't even matter here, seeing as I've been a fan of this author's writing for ages. So much tragicomedy. If you, or anyone reading this ask happen to be a fan of TMA do yourselves a favour and go read their TMA work also.

Late Night Langoustining by whaleofatime. I rarely read fluff but I'm very fond of this one.

Stage Directions by confusedrambler.

I mention sparingly but arkham!jason was my first foray into DC at all- and so naturally Ill Weeds Grow Apace by LananiA3O is something I've come back to, mostly for nostalgia nowadays. And trauma of course.

So if you want to absolutely ruin your entire day and possibly week and possibly several months, Of Broken, Blazing Wings by FrEShAVocaNoob. It absolutely wrecked me, I felt genuinely unwell after, but it was worth it.

Clearly Calm and Keeping Terrorised by Batbirdies & the Make a Little Birdhouse in Your Soul series by bacondoughnut are others I think everyone knows, but I thought I'd mention them anyway.

Anyway, I'm sure it shows that I've got a bit of one-track mind when it comes to characters I read fic about, but I hope this is a good collection for you. It took me two hours in one sitting but for some reason I can't write an essay for my master's degree? Fascinating.

[cleanerdoesntgaming]

numbered list of the alters I have so I can keep count

( + where they’re from if they’re fictives )

Willow 🍡

Fishface🐟

Jet of the Truth (Michael’s Teachings)🔪

Flikkr (Orin Ayo)📺

Donna🌹

Unknown Principal (Michael’s Teachings)🔥

NULL (Baldi’s Basics)📕

3JT-KU❌

Cleaner (Michael’s Teachings)💎

Paloose Man (GFAG)🚨

Mr. Music (GFAG)🎼

Ms. Painter (Michael’s Teachings)🎨

Spud (Regretevator)🥔

Kanesky📜

Mr. Sys (Nintendo)™️

Vade (On Command)🍆

Sayori (DDLC)🌧️

Natsuki (DDLC)🧁

Yuri (DDLC)🖊️

Monika (DDLC)📝

Vera💌

Michael (Michael’s Teachings)✏️

Alex (ABIBAZ)♒️

Billy (BBEG)🚹

TV Dude (Michael’s Teachings)📘

Jctot (Michael’s Teachings)🌈

Anastas (Michael’s Teachings)📙

Do You Accept? (GFAG)📦

Gzoonk (Michael’s Teachings)🥤

Bive (Regretevator)🕯️

Clover (Regretevator)☘️

Sylven☂️

Aspen🍏

Mr. Cotard (Substitute)🔷

Swirlziy➰

Lilac (Orin Ayo)🪻

Kaski (Orin Ayo)🔲

Andrew (Orin Ayo)✖️

Mannequin_Mark (Regretevator)🪜

Wallter (Regretevator)🧱

DrRETRO (Regretevator)🐱

MR (Regretevator)🪨

Split (Regretevator)🍌

Pilby (Regretevator)🐛

Gnarpy (Regretevator)🦠

Mach (Regretevator)🖤

Jeremy (Regretevator)🟪

TARMITE (Regretevator)⬛️

Unpleasant (Regretevator)

The Onceler (Lorax 2012)🌲

Fleshcousin (Regretevator)👁️‍🗨️

Prototype (Regretevator)🔆

Banrey (Regretevator)🤍

Poob (Regretevator)🪅

Pest (Regretevator)🕷️

Lawrence (Idiotic Investing) 💵

Swirlzy 🟡

Letzy 💢

Spark ✨

Vera 🪻

Jerry (TLOE) 🎹

Neesterhere (Factive) 🥒

Umphkin 🎃

Crackhead 🦐

Lerx 🧶

Folly (not from regretevator) 👙

Angel (Angels of Passion i guess) 👛

Ms. Numbers (TLOE) 🔢

Glass Joe (Punch Out) 🇫🇷

King Hippo (Punch Out) 🦛

Don Flamenco (Punch Out) 🇪🇸

Aran Ryan (Punch Out) 🇮🇪

Super Macho Man (Punch Out) 🥂

Chief Sebastian (TLOE) 👁️

.zip □

[libracorpvs]

thank you for tagging me!

Last song: asheq majnoon - mahmoud al turky/محمود التركي- عاشق مجنون

Favourite colour: orange 🧡🍊☀️

Current watching: Succession (good but SO cringey 😬)

Last film: probably barbie tbh, i don't watch many films

Currently reading: a million neurosci papers

Sweet/spicy/savoury: i have a massive sweet tooth but i also love torturing myself with very spicy food

Relationship status: 🥰

Current obsession: hogwarts legacy! if sebastian ends up betraying me or dying or something i'll be SO pissed

Last thing I googled: volcano snail

Currently working on: i have 3 assignments to finish before the end of the month plus something exciting im preparing for in october

Tagging: @researchgate @judasvibe @cotarded @winchesterf @bakerstreetdoctor @blorbortion (no pressure gyns!)

9 people you'd like to get to know better

Tagged by @radidoe

Last song: New Romantics by Taylor Swift

favorite color: green

Currently watching: one piece and beserk 1997

Last movie: Akira

Currently reading: The Body Keeps Score by Dr. Bessel Van Der Kolk

Sweet/Spicy/Savory: savory like a juicy steak or garlic mashed potatoes

Relationship status: In a 5 and 1/2 year long relationship

Current obsession(s): Beserk, Taylor Swift, weightlifting

Last thing I googled:

Currently working on: building big muscles, making friendship bracelets to trade at the taylor swift eras tour movie, looking for a car to replace my 2006 manual transmission mini cooper s that I've had since I was 16, eventually getting a higher paying job

Tagging: @magnetictapedatastorage @lookupmedicalmisogyny @ovaruling @wawaenjoyer @swaglet @shrimpsisbugs @femgoddess-hecate @butchviking @butch-reidentified

[bleedsloyal]

    post - beacon incident .

a verse headcanon list .

unlike for many, joseph’s exposure to STEM did not end with the death of its creator. after being hunted, tortured, and nearly killed in immeasurable ways including by his own hand, MOBIUS had more work to do, and limited subjects to do it. the detective remaining was one of their earliest, dubbed cb-204 and kept medically comatose for the majority of his time. his was a documented study on the prolonged exposure of STEM on a weak mind, and later, testing early models of what they came to call union, studying his experience at beacon to improve upon past failures.

it took the combined efforts of former partner sebastian constellanos and rogue MOBIUS agent juli kidman to come to his aid, but it was not without its sacrifices. 

joseph has an incredible amount of difficulty discerning real situations from hallucinations, and has been known to demonstrate odd and concerning behaviors accordingly. at first, he no longer seems capable of comprehending the direct consequences of actions, and with sudden manic mood swings, is, for awhile, a danger to himself. 

infrequently exhibits delusions similar to cotard’s syndrome stemming from his extended time as a haunted, believing himself not to be real, and/or to be dead. 

insomnia is an understatement.

his memories of his life before stem are disjointed and disorganized, often times out of correct chronological order. sometimes he even has difficulty with his own self-awareness, though time has played some part in fixing that.

due to spending the better part of years literally in his own mind and physically in induced comas, his body was kept alive intravenously. muscle mass he once had built working for the kcpd is gone, it takes time before he is capable of walking and eating solid food again. his immune system is nigh nonexistent to many common illnesses (ie. influenza, colds, etc)

 he absolutely refuses direct hospitalization once capable, instead entrusting the guidance of private practices they can thoroughly research beforehand. were it not quite literally a matter of survival and functionality, he would probably reject even that. eventually he is able to settle with a doctor, who is only allowed in the house in civilian attire, but who oversees his physical rehabilitation process. 

joseph does not seek therapy, between learning of sebastian’s experiences and his own deep mistrust for doctors. he turns to writing as a method of self-soothing instead, even if it is no longer the tidy, organized note keeping of before.

as far as the public, even his own family knows, joseph is dead. with no leads on his supposed disappearance, the kcpd were quick to dismiss him as killed in action after a year. he even has an empty memorial headstone near his family’s plot, and consciously decides not to reach out to change that fact.