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heavyhitterheaux · 8 months ago

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Steady Love (Slight NSFW)

Synopsis: After Joe learns of a secret that you've been keeping from him, he has a big decision to make on whether the relationship is worth saving and if he can accept it

Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader

Do not engage if underage

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Joe was deep in thought as he was on a popular restaurant's website looking at their menu to see everything that they offered. He knew that you, his girlfriend, was extremely picky and had a shit ton of allergies and had to make sure they had options that you could pick from.

He was convinced that your diet consisted of chicken nuggets and iced coffee and got on you all the time about it. His goal was to take you there for date night seeing as you had both been busy all week and now you were going to spend the weekend with him before going to his game on Sunday.

The restaurant had amazing reviews and the person who had told him about it and also made the reservation for it was Ja'Marr who was also on the phone, as Joe had put it on speaker so that he was able to talk to him and look at the website at the same time.

“I think Y/N is hiding something from me.” He blurted out as it had been on his mind for the last few days and he thought that he was going to explode if he didn't say anything to someone soon. He figured that telling one of his best friends was a good choice.

“Wait, what? That was random. Why do you say that? Your girl literally worships the ground you walk on and you do the same thing with her.”

“Something just seems off. I find her sometimes going to a different room to answer her phone, which she protects with her damn life by the way.”

“Don't we all? That doesn't mean anything.”

“No, not like she does. And do you know that I've never stayed at her place before?”

“Huh? The two of you have been together for what seems like forever.” Ja'Marr asked as he was moving around his kitchen and trying to find something to snack on.

“A few months but it's weird. Whenever I propose the idea, she immediately shuts it down. Claiming that my house is closer to her job, which is true but I don't know.”

“I think you’re paranoid and probably thinking too much into this. Y/N is amazing and she can do no wrong in my eyes.”

“Because you love whenever she cooks and tells me to invite you over too, but what if I'm right?”

“Hey! That just happens to be a plus but if you're right then confront her about it and the two of you act like adults and go from there. Just keep in mind she's making me salted caramel cookies next week. Don't mess up my supply.”

“Your supply? You act like we're talking about drugs when we are literally talking about cookies. And she just seemed so stressed out this week so the last thing I want to do is send her over the edge.”

“When it comes to her cooking, it might as well be crack! It's addicting! Look, if it comes up then you two talk about it and if it doesn't just wait for the right time. I'm sure that there's a good explanation to all of this.”

“I'm ignoring the part about the crack.”

“But you didn't ignore it because you just mentioned it.”

“Talking to you should not stress me out as much as it does.” Joe replied as he rolled his eyes and ran a hand through his hair.

“Keep in mind, YOU called me and I made the reservation for you so be nice!”

“Mm hmm.”

“Look, just let me know how it goes once you talk to her.”

Later on that evening, the two of you were now sitting across from one another in a secluded corner of the restaurant sharing the dessert that you had picked out. Joe wasn't one to eat a lot of sweets during the season, however for you he'll always make an exception.

You held your fork up to Joe's mouth and was encouraging him to take a bite but he was looking at you suspiciously before looking at the dessert and then looking back at you.

“Joey! Open!”

“Um.. what is this again?”

“It's a pistachio cheesecake. It's good, come on taste it.”

“It looks weird. And wait! Aren't you allergic to pistachios?”

“No, I got an allergy test done recently and apparently I'm not allergic anymore.”

“How reliable is that? The last thing I need is your throat closing. Do you have benadryl just in case? I'm about to call 911 so that they can be on standby.”

“I planned for my throat to close around something else tonight, but yes.” You told Joe as you winked at him.

Being caught off guard by your comment, his eyes went wide but he quickly recovered as he sent a smirk in your direction.

“Oh, is that so?”

“Mm hmm, I haven't seen you all week so I'm excited to spend the entire weekend with you which also includes plenty of activities that do not require clothes. This week was a lot and I really needed to be around you so this was absolutely perfect. Did you pick the place or did Ja'Marr?”

“We'll definitely get to that later. I know this week was a lot for you and there were a lot of things happening so I'm happy you're spending the entire weekend with me. And yes, it was Ja'Marr’s idea. I had never been here before and he recommended it.”

“Doesn't surprise me since you're such a homebody. I'm going to have to make him more cookies for that one.”

“All of my snacks and streaming services are at home. What do I need to leave for? And no, absolutely not. He's starting to stalk me just for your cookies. Any time he calls me now it's about you and your cooking. First thing out of his mouth is if you were at my house and if you cooked anything and if he can come over.” Joe told you as he laughed with you joining in with him.

“Okay, now open.”

“This better not be nasty.”

“Joey! Stop acting like you're five and open!” He did as he was told and slowly started to chew with his head nodding in approval.

“It's not bad, but I know something that tastes even better and I've been craving it all week actually.”

“What? You said you had never been here before.”

“I was talking about my girlfriend sitting on my face.”

—

“Get over here and stop running from me.” Joe told you as he pulled you back onto his California king bed since you were literally about a few centimeters from hitting the floor.

“I am nowhere done with you. Keep in mind you talked all that shit in the car on the way back and now look, a whimpering dripping mess underneath of me. So wet for me.” He whispered in your ear as he once again inserted two of his fingers into you, pumping them at an even and slow pace knowing that it would get you that much closer.

His fingers slipped out and he held them up to your mouth as you opened and sucked on them.

“See how good you taste?” Joe asked as he leaned down to place several kisses on your lips and slipped inside you at the same time making you gasp and quickly wrap your arms around his neck.

“Look at my pretty girl, she's taking me so well.”

He placed his hand around your neck and slightly squeezed, but not too tight as he increased his pace moving in and out of you.

Your moans were the only thing that you could get to come out of your mouth because of how much pleasure that you were in and knew that you being sore later was inevitable.

“Taking me so well that she can't even utter a single word, huh? This dick got you speechless?” Joe laughed, but was caught off guard when you suddenly flipped him onto his back and began to ride him.

“Damn, wasn't expecting that.”

“Not quite speechless, but you're about to be once I finish riding you.” You explained to him as you smirked with him taking hold of your hips in order to help guide you.

“Come on then, princess. Let's get to it.”

It was now three in the morning and you were wrapped into Joe's tight embrace when your phone began to vibrate violently on the nightstand.

Quickly picking it up to look at it, you were startled go see that it was Jayson, your daughters father and slowly moved from Joe in order to hopefully not wake him up and went into the master bathroom and closed the door behind you to answer it.

“Jayson, what's going on?”

“It's Nalanie. She won't stop crying and she's simply asking for you. She kept asking me to call you and wouldn't take no for an answer.”

“Just hand her the phone.”

“Hello?”

“Mom! I…” She started to say, but couldn't continue her sentence without crying.

“I'm coming, okay? Be there soon.” You comforted her and quickly hung up as you made your way back into the bedroom to still see Joe resting peacefully.

You quickly started moving around with the use of the flashlight on your phone to be able to see and this made Joe wake up and he quickly sat up to reach over to turn on the bedside lamp.

“Uh? Baby? What are you doing?”

“Looking for my clothes, I need to leave.” You told him as you had discovered your outfit that you had worn earlier all the way by the bedroom door suddenly remembering that Joe wasted no time in taking it off of you.

“Why? What's wrong? Did something happen?” He asked while you were hurrying to get dressed and you ignored his question. Not on purpose, but because you had no idea what you were about to walk into once you left there and went and got Nalanie.

Seeing how frantic you were, Joe pulled you over to him since he was sitting on the bed still to try and calm you down.

“Joey, I...”

“You need to breathe for a second and then tell me what's going on with you. You have me worried. What can I do to help you?”

“Just…. let me go please. I want to tell you but…”

“But what? You tell me everything. Or at least I thought you told me everything.” He replied as he took your smaller hand in his large one.

You hesitated before you answered him and it was clear by the look on your face that you didn't want to. The man in front of you had always been honest with you since the two of you had gotten together and it was necessary for you to do the same thing in return. He never deserved to be lied to despite your reasoning for it.

In your mind, you didn't necessarily lie to him, but you definitely didn't tell him the truth either.

“I just got off the phone with my daughter. She was crying and scared and I could barely make out what she was saying. I need to go get her from her father's house. I promise to explain more after I know that she's okay.”

“Wait, what? You’re joking right? Since when do you have a daughter?” Joe asked dumbfounded and he was waiting for the punchline of the joke that just came out of your mouth.

“Since I got pregnant when I was a teenager. Joey, I promise I'll explain but not now. Move so I can get up.” You said as tears were threatening to fall down your face.

“So you mean to tell me that you lied to me? And you've been lying to me this entire time?! I knew that something was off with you and I was right! What else are you hiding?! Are there more kids that I don't know about? Why would you lie about something like that?”

“Nothing. I'm not hiding anything else, I promise.” You said as you slipped on your shoes.

“Hmm, your promises have now been proven to come up empty so I don't want to even hear it. Just do what you have to do.”

“Joey…”

“No, I don't want to hear it. I hope your daughter is okay, but….”

“But what?”

“How am I supposed to be with someone who lies to me? Especially something as big as that?”

“It’s not that simple. I'll explain if you just give me the chance.”

“Oh, but it is. Get your stuff and you can leave.”

“I… fine.” You told him as you grabbed your overnight bag from the chair in the corner and your cell phone that had been placed on the nightstand after you had gotten that frantic call.

You looked at your keys and quickly took the key to Joe's condo off and left it on the nightstand that was closest to his side of the bed.

Without another word, you walked out of his bedroom and down the steps to eventually make it to your car. Once your belongings were in the backseat, the water works that you had been trying so hard to hold in, made themselves known and it was like a dam had broken.

After sitting there for a few minutes and giving yourself a pep talk, you made your way to Nalanie's father's house to make sure that she was okay.

It didn't take long before you were knocking on the front door and it was whisked open by Nalanie herself who then placed you in a bone crushing hug as tears were still streaming down her face. You rubbed small circles along her back as you kissed her cheek in order to get her to calm down.

“Lady Bug, are you going to tell me what's wrong? I'm here now and you're okay.”

She slowly nodded her head and broke her embrace from you and moved to the side so that you would be able to come into the house. Once she did, you were greeted by Jayson and his wife Sabrina who had come from the kitchen in order to greet you.

“Hey, she’s been like this for the past hour. Won't say anything to us. All she wanted was you.” Sabrina told you as she hugged you.

You nodded your head before also hugging Jayson, but Nalanie stayed quiet.

“Lady Bug?”

“Can we just go home?” She quietly asked and the first thing you did was nod.

“Go get your things and meet me back down here.”

Nalanie took the steps two at a time before Jayson looked at you and sighed.

“I was trying to handle it without us calling you, but I didn’t know what else to do. Anddd I just realized I ruined date night for you. How's you know who by the way?”

“Very upset with me because he found out about her like this before I could tell him properly and I think we just broke up? I had literally planned on telling him in the next two weeks or so and I was going to tell her too. But it's not important right now. What is important is my daughter so, if he can't accept her then he's not the one for me.”

“He's probably more upset about finding out in the way he did and not the fact that you have her.”

“Either way, we're probably done, so…”

“Don't give up on him so easily, he may surprise you.” Sabrina said before walking back into the kitchen.

“Just see how it plays out. This is the happiest that I've ever seen you and I would hate for you to miss out on that. Just give him time to process.” Jayson told you and you simply nodded as Nalanie reappeared with all of her bags in tow.

Nalanie said her goodbyes to her father and Sabrina and you picked one of her many bags up off the floor to carry outside. You never understood why she needed so many bags for a three day weekend, but then again she was your child and simply took after you when you thought about how you would do the exact same thing.

The two of you were now home and as soon as you opened the door, you wasted no time in asking her what was wrong.

“Okay, out with it.”

“I got my period and got really scared.”

“Oh, Lady Bug, that is nothing to be scared about. It happens to everyone that has a uterus.”

“I know that I could have asked Sabrina, but I just wanted you. I remember you telling me about what to do if you weren't around and it happened so I took a pad from underneath the sink. I'm sorry that I took you away from whatever you were doing.”

“Don't apologize. You needed me and never ever apologize for needing me. So, how about this?”

“What?”

“Take a bath, put on pajamas and we'll sleep. When we wake up, I'll do your makeup and your hair while we watch Mean Girls?”

“Ooh, deal! Can we make popcorn too?”

“Of course we can and then we're going on a snack run. You can't be on your period and not have a supply of chocolate and ice cream in the house.”

It had been almost an entire two weeks and Joe's finger kept hovering over your number as he debated on calling you while he sat in his living room.

This had happened ever since he had told you to leave that night. The guilt crept in not too long after he had heard you close the front door and he debated on running after you, but decided against it.

He admits that he should've given you a chance to explain everything, but in that moment he was too mad to even listen to one. He couldn't begin to wrap his mind around how you have a daughter.

His mind kept going to you and quickly decided that after practice was over and he was home that he would call you and hopefully you wanted to talk to him, but he honestly wouldn't blame you if you had told him no.

Thinking that it was now or never, he pushed down with his thumb on your number and the phone began to dial.

It rang for a while and Joe was about to hang up, before he heard your soft voice come through the phone.

“Hello?”

“Um, hey.” Joe responded hesitantly.

“Surprised to hear from you. Did you dial the wrong number by chance?” You curiously asked as you were fumbling through your kitchen cabinets looking for ideas on what to make for dinner for you and Nalanie.

“No, I wanted to talk to you. Are you busy right now?”

Startled by this, you placed the box of macaroni noodles on the counter and sat down at the island, trying to take in what he had just asked you.

“No, not at the moment. I'm free to talk.”

“Uh, can we do this in person? I would rather do that than talk on the phone.”

“Sure, I can be over there in 15 minutes.” You told him as you glanced down at your watch. After going over there to see him, you would have to go straight to Nalanie's middle school to pick her up from practice.

“Okay, I'll leave the door open for you.”

It didn't take you very long to get there as you had anticipated, but the anxiety of seeing Joe again after the two of you had left things was starting to kick in.

Maybe this was a formal break up?

No, he probably just wants an explanation and as far as you could tell he was long overdue to hear the truth from you about everything.

Reaching his condo, you pulled into the driveway before getting out of your car and walking up to the door. Turning the handle, it was open just like Joe had promised and a deep breath escaped your mouth before turning it and walking inside.

You found him in the living room and he gave you a small smile before getting up to hug you which caught you off guard. You tightly hugged him back just in case that was the last time that you were able to do it.

“Hi.”

The two of you were now sitting next to each other and Joe was the first to speak.

It was time to get it over with. Now or never.

“Y/N, why would you keep something like that from me? And you've done it for MONTHS. I'm just trying to understand.” he asked you, trying to make sense of the situation. He simply couldn't believe that you lied to him and lied to him about something as big as this.

“I wanted to tell you when I felt that the time was right. Please understand that. I had actually planned on doing it soon, but then everything happened so…..” You quietly said, but all he did was shake his head.

“And when did you exactly plan on doing that? At this rate, you probably weren't about to tell me until we got married.”

“That is not fair and you know it!”

“I knew something was up when you would go to another room to answer phone calls, never let me stay at your place with you and always shut down the idea when I asked, leaving early from date night. I care about you, so you could at the very least let me know what was happening. Even if you weren't ready for me to meet her.”

“I just didn't want her to get attached to you just in case we didn't end on the best terms. It's happened before in the past and I don't want her to be disappointed again. And I also didn't know how you were going to take it.”

“Hmm, I would have dealt with it because I love and care about you. But I see that you obviously don't give me enough credit. If something or in this case, SOMEONE is important to you, they're important to me too. How old is she anyway?”

“She just turned thirteen.” You quietly said and Joe's eyes went wide.

“I still can't believe you tried to hide the fact that you have a child from me.”

“Like I said, I was going to tell you. If you don't want to be with me anymore because I kept this from you, I get it. I think you made that pretty clear two weeks ago. I ultimately was just trying to protect her.” You quietly said feeling defeated.

Even though Joe was definitely upset with you, he moved closer to you and took your hand in his and started rubbing small circles on the back of it.

“What's her name?” He asked and from that point on, the light in your eyes returned.

“Nalanie Rue. But I've always called her Lady Bug. When I brought her home from the hospital and we were walking outside with her to get into the car, one landed on her nose and it's been her name since. I never call her by her real name unless she's in trouble, which isn't often. She's a really good kid and I honestly couldn't have asked for more. I'm really proud to be her mom.” You confessed as you told Joe about your daughter.

“I see the way you lit up when I asked you about her.”

“I got pregnant when I was 15 and was obviously scared out of my mind. I tried to hide it from my parents for a while but then my mom noticed that I wasn't using the tampons or pads she would put in my bathroom every month for me and she confronted me about it. They’ve always supported me even though I know deep down that they think that I robbed myself of my childhood, which is fair in a sense. I couldn't really go out with my friends unless I took her with me.”

“And you get along with her father? I'm assuming he is in the picture since he's the one who called you first?”

“Yes, he was there from day one when I told him and didn't back down. He's a year older than me. He got a job and would buy her as much as he could. Jayson. He's amazing to her and they have a good relationship. We're still close and he’s married now. But his wife treats Nalanie like she's hers and that's the best thing I could have asked for. I really lucked out because I know a lot of other people aren't as fortunate. My only prayer was that whoever he decided to marry would do right by her.”

“When did she meet his wife?”

“Literally right before he proposed to her and that was something that we both agreed on, but she did know about her. We never bring anyone around her unless we're absolutely sure that they'll be there for the long haul because both of us have messed up in the past with that. We want to protect her like I said before.” You honestly said and Joe was taking in everything that you had told him.

“And I told Jayson about you, but not Nalanie. From his perspective and the way that I talk about you he's really happy for me and all for it. But he did say that he wanted her to meet you. It might also help that you're his favorite player but who knows.” You said to Joe and a small smirk broke out onto his face.

“You're the one calling the shots here. I just want you to do whatever you're comfortable with. I would love to meet her whenever you feel that the time is right. But Y/N….”

“Hmm?” You asked as you turned once more to look at him and he sighed before answering you.

“You can't keep things like this from me. We've been together for a while and you know better than anyone how much I'm going to be there to support you with whatever is going on in your life, just like you do for me. No more secrets. Promise me. I get your reasoning behind it, but you having a daughter was not going to be a dealbreaker for me.”

“Promise. No more secrets from here on out.” You replied back to him as he leaned over to place a kiss on your forehead. He relaxed into the couch as you brought your head slightly to the left to be able to lean against his chest as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Do you want to see what she looks like?” You asked Joe at the same time that you had reached for your phone, not really waiting for an answer.

You never wasted an opportunity to show off your daughter and let people know how proud you were of her.

Joe nodded as you went to your gallery and pulled up the most recent photos of the two of you and moved it closer so that he could see it.

“She literally looks just like you.”

“My little twin. Everyone says the same thing when they see her except she's a little taller than me. She is literally my baby. I cried when she turned thirteen. I can't wrap my head around me now having a teenager.”

“And you’re going to do such an amazing job with her. I can see that you already are.”

“Well if you're ready to meet her, we can do it tomorrow. It's Thursday and she likes football just as much as her parents do.”

“How about football and an ice cream date? Does she like ice cream?”

“She does. Mint chocolate chip is her favorite and I always tell her how weird she is because I never met a kid that said that was their favorite flavor. Oh, and I should tell you something….”

“That's wild that she likes that flavor, but what is it?”

“The Bengals are her favorite team and for good reason but…”

“But what?”

“Ja'Marr is her favorite player so she is going to interrogate you about him.” You confessed as you stifled a laugh and Joe held his hand over his heart pretending that he was hurt.

“But I think the two of you will get along just fine.”

“Oh, and I think you'll need this back.” Joe told you as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the key that you had left on his nightstand.

Staying over with Joe lasted around forty five minutes until you told him about going to get Nalanie from practice. Once you had picked her up and the two of you were eating dinner and watching Netflix, you figured that it was a good time to tell her about meeting Joe tomorrow and nudged her to get her attention as she was sitting next to you on the couch.

“I have something that I want to tell you.”

“Okay, I'm listening. Is everything okay?” She replied as she turned to look at you.

“Everything's fine. I want you to meet someone really special to me tomorrow after you get home from school. We're going to get ice cream and…”

“MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP!”

“Yes, you can have that disgusting flavor and we'll watch Thursday Night Football with him.” You told her as you turned up your nose and she promptly stuck her tongue out at you.

“That is literally the best flavor of ice cream, you are such a hater. But wait a minute… him?”

“Yes, him.” You replied as you nodded your head.

“Hmm, I have to approve. I need to make sure that he's good enough to be in a relationship with my mom. If the two of you are in a relationship that is.” She said as she narrowed her eyes at you suspiciously.

“We are and I forgot how overprotective that you can get but I definitely think that the two of you will get along really well. You two like a lot of the same things including football.” You said as you thought about her probably wanting to go to every Bengals game once she meets Joe.

“In my eyes, only very few people meet my expectations of being good enough for you. And I want to see you happy, but you look happy so I guess he's doing something right so I'm okay with it. And I know he must be important because I never meet anyone that you date.”

“And be nice. No interrogating.”

“No promises.”

You and Joe agreed to meet at one of your favorite ice cream stands that wasn't too far from your job and you found yourself going there sometimes when you got a break to destress by eating a treat that you knew was going to satisfy your craving. It also had a small park nearby and that's where you planned on meeting him.

Nalanie was actually bouncing off the walls and very excited to meet the mystery man, or it was the fact that she was going to get ice cream in the middle of the week.

It was probably the latter.

The two of you were in line and you were about to pay for your ice cream as well as Nalanie's when you felt a presence behind you. You got a whiff of the cologne that you grew to love so much and knew that it was your boyfriend. Joe then slipped the cashier his card as you shook your head and smiled while Nalanie was looking around confused.

“Wait, mom, where's your man? Is he late? I thought he was supposed to be here already. And why is Joe Burrow here? Wait! Is Ja'Marr here too?” She asked as she was looking around to see if she could spot her favorite player.

“Lady bug, this is my boyfriend Joe and Joe this is my daughter Nalanie.”

“It's nice to meet you Nalanie, your mom has told me all about you.” Joe told her and she slowly nodded her head up and down indicating that she was still taking everything in.

At that moment, her eyes went wide.

“I.. wow… It's nice to meet you too. I had this whole speech in my head to interrogate you with but now I can't remember a word of it.”

“Nalanie! I said NO interrogating!”

“He seems like he would be able to take it anyway.” She told you and you shook your head at her.

“I didn't bring Ja'Marr, but maybe next time. Since someone did tell me that he was your favorite player.”

“Don't be jealous, you're a close second.” She replied as she smiled.

Over the next several months, you watched as Joe and Nalanie grew closer and was happy that they were building such a good relationship with one another. There were even a few conversations that had happened regarding the two of you moving in with him and of course Nalanie was all for it, but you on the other hand wanted a little bit more time before you came to a final decision about it. Joe told you that there was absolutely no rush and that the offer would stand.

It was currently Friday and you were stuck in traffic due to an accident as you were on your way to get Nalanie. You didn't want to keep her waiting and since it was her weekend with you instead of spending it with her dad, you quickly asked Joe if he could get her for you.

You- Joey, I'm stuck in traffic, could you go and get Nalanie for me? But only if you aren't busy. I owe you for this.

Joey- You don't owe me anything and of course I'll go and get her. We'll wait for you before we decide on dinner.

You- Thank you, I love you 😘💕

Joey- I love you more and be safe.

Nalanie was surprised to see Joe instead of you as he pulled up in his Porsche, but quickly slipped into the passenger seat as Joe had leaned over to open the door for her.

“Hey, where's my mom? Not that I’m not happy to see you or anything.” She told him as she brought the seatbelt across her body.

“Stuck in traffic so she asked me to come and get you. We'll decide on dinner once she gets back. How was your day at school?”

“Hmm, it was okay, but this boy Cody is convinced that girls don't know more about football then boys so we got into an argument at lunch about it.”

“Did you know that there are more women who actually watch it then men do?” Joe told her and she quickly nodded.

“See!? And that's what I told him. I was firing off all these stats about my favorite players, you were included, and he was just looking at me like he didn't know what I was talking about.”

One thing Joe knew Nalanie was passionate about was football and sports in general and that you and her were never one to back down from an argument or discussion regarding it.

“He sounds like he talks a big game, but can't back it up.”

“I'm convinced that his head is full of air instead of a brain.”

“You literally sound just like your mother.” Joe told her as he laughed and came to a slow stop at a red light.

“I have a question. Well, two actually.”

“Ask away.” Joe told her as the light turned green.

“Well first, when are you going to marry my mom? She's really happy with you and I can tell.”

Hearing Nalanie ask this caught him off guard, but he quickly composed himself.

“Hmm, funny you should ask. Can you keep a secret? And I also wanted to ask you something.” He said and she quickly nodded.

“I already got her ring, just have to plan when I'm going to do it. And I wanted to ask your permission too, because I feel that it's important.”

“Really!? Well you already know that my answer is yes. I already consider you my bonus dad and that's a plus. This is the happiest that I've ever seen her. What does it look like? Can I see it?”

A million thoughts were running through Nalanie's head about how excited she was about the entire thing. She finally felt that now her family would be complete.

“I have it hidden in my room, hoping she doesn't find it but I'll show you later. What was your next question?”

“Are you two going to have a baby? Or babies? I like the idea of at least three. I want a sibling or siblings to play with.”

“I… you are so full of questions today.”

“I only asked you two questions and you are definitely stalling. I guess all that media training has led you to be able to learn how to dodge questions.”

“I'm not dodging the question!”

“Lies! Then answer it!”

At that moment, Joe's phone rang indicating that it was you and quickly answered it as Nalanie made a face at him.

“Saved by the phone call. But I'm definitely going to ask again later.”

It was around eight at night when you were painting Nalanie's nails on the floor in the living room while Joe was sitting on the couch behind both of you and she noticed that you kept glancing at her.

“Uh, mom? Everything okay? You literally only do that when you have something that you want to tell me.” She asked as you were now painting a second coat. This also caught Joe's attention and he quickly looked over at you.

“Well there is something….” You said as you gestured for her to put her hand in the nail dryer.

“What is it?” She asked as she looked between the two of you and you looked at Joe to give him permission to tell her.

“I think that the role of being a big sister is going to look pretty good on you.” Joe told her and her mouth was now hanging wide open.

“Now I see why you didn't answer my question earlier.”

“Wait, what question?” You asked her and she sent a smile in your direction.

“I asked him when the two of you were going to give me a sibling, but I see that was clearly already in the works. I want at least three by the way.” She told you as she pointed to your midsection.

“Umm, we'll have to see about that and we wanted to make sure that everything was okay before we said anything about it.”

“Well I'm excited for that obviously and now I guess there's only one more part left.”

“And what part is that?”

“The part where you two get married and then we'll be a family for real.”

Taglist:

@hoodharlow

@a-moment-captured

@wickedfun9

@dandelionwrites8

@keiva1000

#joe burrow #joe burrow smut #joe burrow fanfiction #joe burrow fanfic #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joe burrow x black reader #joe burrow fluff #joe burrow angst #nfl imagine #cincinnati bengals #Spotify

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ihatedtoadmit · 4 months ago

Text

Too much

pairing: Bang Chan x gn! reader

genre: angst, comfort

warnings: self-hatred

word count: ~2.6k

summary: Loneliness is a silent killer, although when you notice its presence, you almost run into its blade willingly, had it not been for Chan to save you from yourself.

a/n: I know. Chan again. I apologise but he is my comfort place, in a sense.

↳ Main Masterlist

It was supposed to be a normal day, like any other, yet the weight in my chest only proved me wrong. It settled over me like a veil–, no, like chains, dragging me down to the bottom of the sea. Darkness enveloped me now, both in mind and in body, form hidden beneath the thick layer of my blanket. Even its fuzzy texture and soft fibres couldn’t comfort me, something I had thought impossible before.

Now, it was my reality.

I had woken up like usual, left alone in the shared apartment of my significant other. He worked hard, far harder than anyone I’d ever known, passionate about his job to a degree I could only ever hope to understand. My own work was remote, not needing me to leave the house much, if at all. Still, that had never stopped him from leaving me a message on my phone, always leading to us chatting until he got back home.

Until those messages had turned more and more sparse, comeback season having kept him understandably busy. It had always been a stressful season for him and the entire team, a fact I understood without a doubt.

Yet, on this particular day, a realisation had dawned on me: I relied on him too much.

For so long – practically between comeback seasons – we spent our days together, may that be through phone or not. And as he now worked away in his studio, far too busy to check my message, I’d realised how empty I felt. How my days were spent waiting for a notification, my heart caring too much about one person.

Talking with others didn’t feel the same, or at least those who understood me to a similar degree to him were just as busy, if somehow not more. I’d become isolated in this place, a prison of my own doing.

How I despised my heart for choosing who to trust the most, who to run to for attention when possible, like a touch-starved dog begging for headpats.

It was what had driven me beneath my blanket, curled up until my joints shifted and bones creaked, entirely too weakly body groaning in protest. I understood why it was screaming at me as it was I who had decided to lay there for hours, unmoving, on the verge of tears yet not quite letting them fall. Every single time my thoughts took a turn and over-analysed another interaction with someone, with him, my eyes turned glossy, imprisoning those crystalline droplets like my thoughts had imprisoned me.

I couldn’t believe how clingy I had become, how deeply it was embedded into my nature despite my endless tries to get rid of it, ever since I was a child. No human being could ever possibly give me this much of their attention, no matter how they said it was fine, as it was physically impossible.

I’d been hurt by those promises too much in the past to believe them again.

Yet, even now, I kept listening, breath stilling just so I could hear the soft buzzing of my phone: the telltale sign of a notification. None came, however, and I was left only feeling worse, like a leech that had somehow managed to deceive those around it. They hadn’t signed up for someone like me upon the beginning of our friendships; nobody would have expected to suddenly get a friend who needed attention practically all day and week.

My body shivered and I only curled up tighter, the day now gone with me having done nothing at all. No chores, no hobbies, nothing. I was lucky enough to have had today off work-wise, although perhaps it would have taken my mind off of this thing.

I wasn’t sure, although I would have had this realisation sooner or later anyway.

The lock turned and I froze, body straining to check my phone for a time. The sudden light blinded me and yet I powered through it, burning eyes confirming my suspicions: it was far too early for Chan to be home.

His steps had already halted somewhere in the living room, voice laced with worry as he called out to me. It was enough for me to know that I would be caught had I gone out to greet him, nowhere near a state stable enough to pretend I was fine. My glossy eyes only watered more from having checked my phone, sensitive to the bright light after being in the darkness for so long.

The door slowly creaked open and light poured in from behind me, yet I remained still, hoping he’d think I was asleep. It was strange enough I hadn’t greeted him back, tall form laden with comfy clothes and waddling out to greet him with an all-encompassing hug.

Now he only got a small lump under a blanket, still and unresponsive.

His voice was quiet as he called out to me again, gentle, as if speaking any louder would shatter me. The hand that now caressed my shoulder was equally gentle, if not more, careful to not put any pressure on me. Despite that I didn’t move, mindful of my breathing and keeping it steady.

“What’s wrong, love?”

Apparently I was much too late to pretend I was fine, easy to read like an open book.

“Are you having a bad day mentally, or physically?” – he tried again, that beautiful voice even more tender, just for my sake.

I shifted then, curling up even tighter, if possible, yet it wasn’t enough to break the connection we had. Chan’s hand remained firm on my shoulder, as if it was written in the fabric of reality to be so.

“How did you know?” – my voice was small, too small, yet he didn’t comment on it. “You only ever do this when something’s wrong. Besides, this is your comfort blanket, love. You use it when you want to feel cosy and whenever you’re in need of a hug. Don’t shut me out, please? We’ve talked about this. Let me hug you, let me take care of you.”

His words were met with silence, although my lower lip was trembling as the coil within my chest was wound too tight now. He didn’t see it, of course not, it was physically impossible. I’d positioned myself to not be seen, ashamed of myself and who I’d become, who I truly was.

The hold on my shoulder tightened ever so slightly, worry no doubt coursing through Chan’s veins at my lack of response. It was extremely rare for one of us to do this, to go completely silent; we’d laid down some rules in our relationship long ago, just so there wouldn’t be any hurt feelings over misunderstandings. But I couldn’t speak now.

Not when doing so would break the dam inside my heart, letting everything ugly I’d kept inside spill out and taint this wonderful person.

Chan didn’t speak again as he instead let his actions do all the talking, the bed dipping behind me as he laid down. I wasn’t engulfed and I wasn’t moved; he simply had that hand on my arm now, thumb going back and forth in a comforting motion I didn’t deserve. He didn’t know how it only made me feel worse, to receive comfort when I was the one supposed to be giving it.

To be so weak and dependent on someone who was already dealing with too many things, it disgusted me.

I disgusted myself.

I wasn’t sure how long we had remained like that, just him quietly laying behind me as I fought against my tears. Eventually I failed, the droplets spilling forth and leaving behind glistening trails on my skin. A soft sniffle escaped me without my consent, causing the hold on my arm to tighten, yet Chan never pressed for a response or explanation.

He knew it wouldn’t work, knew it would only cause me to shut myself off.

Instead the sheets rustled as I moved sluggishly, limbs aching and joints popping. I could already see the grimace on his face at the sounds, knowing not all were natural but due to the state of my withering body. No matter, it wasn’t important right now.

“Channie, be honest. Am I too much?”

I watched as his expression shifted, eyes wide and mouth agape in shock. He probably didn’t expect such a question without warning, although to me, its presence made complete sense. This gaping emptiness in my chest perhaps hadn’t formed today, but I finally noticed it and things couldn’t stay the same. Not anymore.

I couldn’t keep being this dependent on a few people, on him all alone.

“What? Where did you even get this idea? Of course you’re not. You’re my baby, my love, my everything. Did someone comment something like this again?” – his voice was rushed, firm, as if in a race to reassure me.

I shook my head, denying his claims.

“Then what happened? Where did you get that stupid idea from?”

My eyes momentarily closed as his hand slid up to my face, wiping a few tears away, only to have more in their wake. He didn’t stop though and instead lingered there, the missed warmth of his hand slowing the droplets’ descent.

“I just realised some things now that you’re busy. Nobody said anything to me.”

Those warm orbs twisted at my words, turning darker and pained. Both his hands held my face now and with so much affection I felt like I was robbing the man, feeling a twist in my stomach at just how worried he seemed now.

“And what did you realise?” – his voice was smaller this time, as if afraid to ask, to know.

A deep inhale expanded my chest forcefully, yet once again not enough to sever our bond. His hands remained firmly in place, thumbs catching my ever-falling tears, causing my chest to tighten impossibly more. The ends of my lips dipped the moment I could feel the dam cracking within my heart, within my soul, disgusting tar and sewage leaking out through the thin openings.

And he stood at its foot, arms open, ready to let it wash over him.

“How can you tolerate me? I yap and whine a lot, even when I know you’re busy and stressed. Even now, I should be the one comforting you and yet here I am, breaking down, again. This isn’t fair towards you, to have someone so demanding as me as your partner. Or as someone in your life in general. I’m clingy and can easily overthink things, needing constant reassurance that nobody has the fucking time or energy to give. Of course they don’t, it’s physically impossible, so why? Why do you look at me like this, as if seeing me in pain hurts you?” – my voice died near the end, cracking from the unbearable weight of my emotions.

Chan didn’t hesitate.

Steady arms pulled me close and buried me into his chest, as if he was openly offering the place for me to live. His heart beat strongly in its cage, and I didn’t doubt that he would have scooted it away just to give me space there. It was such a Chan thing to do, to give without needing anything back and it only drove that self-inflicted knife deeper into my own chest.

“That’s not true. Maybe you don’t believe me right now, but none of what you said is true.”

His hold on me only tightened as he muttered those words into my hair, holding me so tight it felt as if he thought I would disappear otherwise.

“First of all, you take care of me plenty, my love. You always check in on me, leave me something each day to enjoy. Sometimes it’s a small note with a doodle and a short, but sweet message on it, other times it’s some cookies I can take in and eat with the boys. Just the other night you held me like this, lulling me to sleep with your gentle touches and humming.”

A violent sob tore itself out of me at that, two sides of my mind warring against each other. One wanted to believe Chan’s words, that I had some worth and wasn’t just some greedy bastard, while the other was incapable of accepting such things. They fought against each other in a violent battle, rendering me a sobbing mess in someone’s arms who I didn’t even think I was deserving of.

Yet, Chan’s arms remained around me, as if saying ‘You do deserve it’.

“Secondly, you always do your best to respect my space out of your own volition. I’ve never had to ask for it, because whenever you know I’m at work or stressed, you keep to yourself a bit. Only when I replied or I’m obviously free do you bombard me with messages or cutely start rambling about a new hyperfixation of yours. And I love it when you do that. I love seeing you be so excited about something that you nearly burst at the seams, and even be more excited to tell me about it.” – his voice was tender, so sure in itself even in its wavering state.

I didn’t react, overwhelmed by the emotions wrecking my body from the inside, despicable and ugly.

Yet, he still loved me like this, and I couldn’t understand how.

“You’ve never been too much, love. It’s okay to feel lonely at times, to feel more comfortable with certain people than others. That’s why I and your closest friends are here, and I’m sure they’d say the same. We love you both when you’re quiet and more reserved, and when you can barely contain your excitement over wanting to share something.”

A hiccup escaped me at that, and I just knew I’d tainted his t-shirt, terribly so.

“But you’re busy and stressed, and also have to take care of the boys besides yourself. I don’t—I don’t want to add onto that by being clingy. I hate that I feel the need to do so.” “You wouldn’t, my love. Never. But to make you feel better, how about I’ll put my phone on don’t disturb when I’m busy, hm? Then you can message me whenever you want, and when I’m free, I’ll reply shortly. Would that make you feel better?”

I nodded into his shirt, although that solution was a mere bandage to an open wound. Blood kept gushing from it as the plaster could do nothing against its force, only time and self-reflection able to heal it, if anything.

My knuckles turned white from the force I held onto him, greedily basking in his warmth despite knowing I shouldn’t.

“Please don’t ever keep it in if you ever feel like this again. I’m always there for you, my love, always. And you should know by now, silly,” – his voice gained a certain lightness to it, desperately hoping to lift this heavy atmosphere in the room – “I love nothing more than taking care of the boys, taking care of you. It’s what drives me to be better, to always be there for you in case of anything.”

His lips pressed into the crown of my head, sending warmth gently crawling down my spine, easing the knots in my stomach and the tense state of my muscles.

“You give so much yet ask for nothing, deriving yourself of even your basic needs.” “Perhaps that’s why Seungminnie said you’re dating a version of yourself.”

A chuckle blossomed in Chan’s chest at that, brief but sincere all the same. I smiled at the sound, unable to keep it in when it was one of my favourites.

“Can we stay like this for a little bit longer?” “Always, my love. Always.”

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ahqkas · 7 months ago

Note

oh need need need reader being a famous socialite who bruce uses as cover but actually isn't that bad so bruce keeps using them as cover until people start assuming they're dating for realsies .......

♯ SHINING JUST FOR YOU

— gn!reader, fluff

THE GALA WAS PACKED TO THE BRIM, a swirling mess of gotham’s elite draped in velvet and silk, their filled champagne glasses reflecting the crystalline lights above. it was the kind of event where smiles were sharp blades, handshakes were chess moves, and everything felt as calculated as it was extravagant. bruce wayne thrived in this world—not because he loved it, but because he knew how to play the part.

and you? you weren’t a player. you were a queen on the board.

everywhere you went, heads turned. you had an effortless magnetism to you, the kind that made people lean in a little too close, laugh a little too loud at your jokes, and, most importantly, forget to ask too many questions. it’s why a man like bruce had first approached you, months ago, during an event like this one.

you’d been leaning against the bar, champagne flute in hand, watching the room with an air of amused detachment. when bruce had slid into the space next to you, his presence commanding even in its quietness, you’d glanced up at him with a raised eyebrow.

“mr. wayne,” you’d said, your voice smooth and unhurried. the city’s richest playboy at your disposal? this was going to be fun. “to what do i owe the pleasure?”

“i need a dance partner,” he’d replied simply, his eyes scanning the large crowd of arrogant and spoiled men and women. “someone who knows how to handle attention.”

you had tilted your head, intrigued by his simple proposition. you’d be lying if you said you didn’t except him to ask you to warm the cold side of his bed. this was a surprise. “why me?”

“because you know how to shine without blinding anyone,” he’d said, his lips curving into the faintest hint of a smile.

and that was how it started. at first, bruce wayne had used you sparingly—a date to events where his presence required a certain kind of charm and attention. you were poised, witty, and sharp enough to deflect any intrusive questions. you were also discreet, never prying into why bruce needed a date so often or why he’d leave midway through the night with a vague excuse and a practiced smile.

to him, you were perfect.

but over time, things changed. you weren’t just a convenient cover anymore. you were . . . fun.

now, standing at bruce’s side at yet another gala, you could feel the weight of a thousand eyes on you both. bruce, ever composed, was the perfect picture of gotham’s golden boy—polished and impenetrable. you, however, were the spark in the room, the counterpoint to his quiet stoicism.

“you’ve been quiet tonight,” you murmured quietly, leaning closer to him as if sharing some scandalous secret. your perfume, soft and sweet, teased at his senses.

“am i?” bruce replied, his voice low, though his lips twitched in the faintest smile. it was amusing to him, how well you seemed to know him.

“you’ve only grunted at four people so far,” you teased. “usually, you’re at least at six by now.”

bruce chuckled under his breath, a sound so rare it made you grin in triumph. “maybe i’m saving them for later.”

your hand brushed his as you reached for a glass of champagne from a passing tray, and it wasn’t lost on you how the small gesture sent ripples through the crowd. people were watching you both, their whispers just quiet enough to miss but loud enough to feel.

“did you hear? bruce wayne is here with a date!”

“it isn’t the first time they’re attending an event together . . . ”

“i bet they’ll soon enough become official.”

you didn’t let it show, but the whispers made your chest tighten. bruce, as always, seemed unaffected, his mask firmly in place.

by the end of the night, you were seated with him in the back of his car, your shoes kicked off and your head leaning against the window. the city lights streaked past in a blur, and the hum of the engine filled the silence.

“they think we’re dating,” you said, breaking the quiet.

bruce glanced at you from the corner of his eye, expression unreadable. “does it bother you?”

“not at all. does it bother you?”

he held your gaze for a moment longer than necessary before looking away. “it works, doesn’t it?”

“bruce wayne, ever the pragmatist,” you teased lightly, though your chest ached just a little at the impersonal response.

what neither of you said—what neither of you even dared to admit to yourselves—was that the lines had begun to blur there.

you noticed it in the small things. the way bruce’s hand lingered on the small of your back when guiding you through a crowded room. the way he asked questions about your day, about your life, as if he genuinely cared. the way he looked at you sometimes—like you weren’t just a convenience, but someone he saw.

bruce noticed it too. the way he found himself seeking your company outside of these events, inviting you to dinner or simply showing up at your door with some excuse about needing your opinion on something. the way your laughter softened the edges of his world, making the darkness he carried feel just a little lighter.

one evening, alfred found the two of you sitting by the fireplace in wayne manor, the soft glow of the flames casting warm light across the room. you were curled up on the couch, one leg tucked beneath you, a glass of wine in hand as you told some story that had bruce actually smiling—a real, genuine smile.

i don’t think i’ve ever seen him like this, the old butler thought to himself as he retreated quietly, leaving you both to whatever unspoken thing was growing between you.

for bruce, letting someone in had always been a risk. but with you? it didn’t feel like a gamble. it felt inevitable.

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weirdsht · 11 months ago

Note

cale with idiots in love trope

- "You're cute" "hm?" "I said you look like a boot."

- casual displays of affection, hand holding bc s/o would space out and may or may not get lost (directionally challenged)

- pretending everything is casual, but they're soooo in love with each other

- "I look like a mess" "the prettiest mess"

- the kids absolutely love when they get cuddles with cale and s/o

- maybe braiding cales hair??

- whenever cale goes somewhere and can't bring them, they'd go like "I'll be going for a while" (cale) "I'll always be here" (s/o)

- stealing cales clothes bc its comfy!!

- "are you asleep?" "...no" "wanna talk?"

- "I love you" "I've loved you my entire life"

Can’t Two People Be Friends? - Cale/Gn! Reader

tags: gender-neutral reader, deputy commander reader, getting together fic, vague novel spoilers, is told from Alberu's perspective, tired Alberu, save Alberu from his dumb dongsaeng, use of degrading words (e.g. stupid) but it's in a loving way, have I mentioned Alberu is tired of Cale's shit?

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are currently closed but my ask are still open (read navi)

Buy Me Dessert

Navigation Masterlist

another anon said: cale who acts like a lover to his "closest confidant", though they are not in a relationship, they certainly do act like one– to the point that his crew would question them, to which they'd respond "We're just friends" "What do you mean? They look at you like you're their entire world"– which then starts their operation, get cale a lover

Cale Henituse is someone who has a lot of people under his wing. He's a heroic person busy saving the continents– no, the world. Which was why it is no surprise to find out that he has a close confidant. He has a second-in-command who helps him plan everything and is in charge of backup plans in case something goes wrong.

All of that is normal. Expected even.

What isn’t normal is how they act towards each other.

They act like… people who have a deeper relationship than just friends, for lack of a better term.

Like right now. [Name] is holding onto Cale’s arms as they navigate through this tiresome ball. Looking at him as if he had hung up the moon and the stars.

“Your Highness, you are quite close to the both of them… are we sure they are merely close friends?”

One of the nobles talking to Alberu Crossman questions as everyone watches the commander-and-deputy-commander duo dance in the centre of the hall.

“Of course they are. They have said so themselves.”

Alberu adds on at the end about how they shouldn’t inquire about another person’s private life.

However, Alberu himself is quite frustrated.

It was the truth when he said the two are nothing more than friends. And that’s what frustrates him. The two idiots can’t see the way they stare at each other. Can’t notice how they are unconsciously each other’s priority no matter what happens.

Alberu also knows that he isn’t the only one feeling this way.

No, as a matter of fact, everyone in Cale’s group feels the same frustration the future king feels.

“When will they get together? They deny their feelings as if we didn’t see them cuddling last night while reading a novel.”

On complained one day while eating the crown prince’s cookies.

“I’ve always known that our young master was quite dense in the aspect of love but… hmmm, I must say that this level is getting frustrating.”

Ron shared his own opinion as he served everyone tea.

Well everyone except the two people who are the topic of their discussion. Of course, they aren’t. For they were busy cuddling in the newly installed swing in the garden of the black castle while reading a novel. [Name] is busy platonically nuzzling their head in Cale’s chest, while Cale himself is busy platonically draping his legs over [name] as they lay down on the large swing.

‘Merely friends my ass’

Alberu thinks to himself as he watches the two from the window while sipping on the tea Ron served.

The people inside the room merely complained about Cale and [Name]’s relationship. They did not say anything about forcing them to get together and be in a romantic relationship.

And it’s not because they respect what the two have now.

No, it was simply because they didn’t need to say such things out loud. The complaints they have said out loud are enough confirmation to ensure that everyone is on the same page.

That everyone will be doing their best to show those two knuckleheads that what they have is more than platonic.

“You do know that you only let [Name] braid your hair like that. Do you realise just how much special privilege you give them?”

“What special privilege? The kids also braided my hair.”

Alberu’s dumb dongsaeng stared at him in confusion and the crown prince swears his about to have an aneurysm.

“Yes, but they are your kids. Of course, you’ll indulge them.”

“That is true…”

For a moment Alberu thought that they were finally heading somewhere.

“But [Name] is the only one who can braid my hair neatly like this.”

Turns out the only place they are heading to is back to square one.

Alberu pushed down the urge to smack a chair in his beloved dongsaeng’s face. How could he forget Ron’s existence? The Ron that does every task perfectly, but still could not braid the redhead’s hair because ‘only [Name] can do it perfectly’.

Cale better be glad Alberu didn’t transform Taerang into a hammer and threw it in his face.

“I love you, you know that right?”

[Name] had asked Cale during one of their cuddling sessions and Raon’s ears perked up.

“Of course I do.”

Cale answered casually and it got Raon’s hopes up.

“Are you guys together???”

He asked, eyes full of hope.

“What do you mean silly? Of course, we’re together, we’ve been friends for years now.”

That night Raon did not speak to any of them, and the two idiots only thought he was sick and tried to coax him to talk to them.

Subtle advances like that continued for a while before they all admitted defeat. One day Rosalyn even straight up asked [Name] how they felt about Cale. To which the deputy commander only responded with “he’s my best friend of course” before going on their merry way to steal another one of Cale’s clothes.

Just when all of them are about to give up Alberu caught the two of them talking in that same swing one night.

He was about to go back to the palace. Only went to sneak into Raon’s castle to talk to Cale about an important business that cannot be said through a communication device. However, just as he was about to teleport back he heard the two.

“Why are you still awake?”

“I couldn’t sleep. You weren’t in bed.”

“Wanna talk then?”

Alberu silently scoffs at them. Even their conversations sound like their married already.

They talk for a few minutes. Topics vary from the mundane to philosophical questions no one can answer.

It didn’t look like Alberu would get anything from eavesdropping so he thinks about going home.

But then…

“I know we’re both too busy. I know this will only add more burden to you. However, I must say it.”

[Name] spoke gently. Their eyes which were previously watching the stars shifted their focus to stare at Cale’s face.

“I love you. I love you so much. I love you more than life.”

That made the crown prince stop in his tracks. For a moment he remembers Raon’s complaints about how they seem to say “I love you” to each other without it meaning anything. For a moment he doubted if it was a confession.

Of course that didn’t stop him from recording the whole thing.

“I love you too. I’ve loved you this entire time. I’ll love you even after death.”

At Cale’s reciprocity, Alberu finally moved to give the privacy. He may want to see the two of them get together, but he does not want to see them kiss. A confession was enough to satisfy him.

But the irritation he feels from waiting for them to confess did not go away.

Hence why instead of going home he first went to his instructor, Choi Han.

Alberu Crossman did not say to the swordmaster. He only hands him a piece of paper before going back to his palace.

In that paper wrote:

The two idiots are finally together. I have a recording if anyone is interested. I’ll show it in exchange for a recording of you lightly smacking my lovely dongsaeng head upside-down. I’m sure my instructor will understand where I’m coming from.

Choi Han does. He greatly understands where his student was coming from.

That’s why, the next morning he was setting up a hidden recording device with a smile on his face.

Oh, he also got everyone’s permission before he set it up. In fact, most of them cheered at the thought of him physically knocking some sense in their young master’s head.

#le asks #lcf x reader #tcf x reader #lotcf x reader #totcf x reader #gender neutral reader #x gn reader #manhwa x reader #trash of the count's family #lout of the count’s family #tcf #lcf #cale henituse #cale x reader #cale henituse x reader #lotcf #totcf #alberu crossman

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ldolbybts · 3 months ago

Text

Forbidden - Part 1

Pairing ➜ Dealer!yoongi x Female Reader Warnings ➜ 18+, female masturbation, phone sex, sexting, heavy drug use, alcohol use Summary ➜ You never meant to lock eyes with the beautiful stranger at Namjoon’s house party, you also didn’t mean to completely fall for him. Word Count ➜ 9.3K

[This is a repost of a fic I wrote like 5 years ago but since i remade i wanted to reupload it, enjoy!]

As you tried to finish up your final assignment of the week, you sat on your dorm room bed, legs crossed in front of your laptop. You couldn’t wait to have it finished.

As you finished writing the last sentence your phone began to buzz, turning it round to see who it was you read the name with a small smile, tapping your finger on the screen to answer.

“Hey! You ready to party?” Jungkook’s loud voice yelled down the phone to you.

You rolled your eyes at his excited tone, the youngest out of all you was always down for a party, and to his own credit he definitely knew how to do it right.

“Yeah, whose house is it at this time?” You asked.

“Namjoon’s house, you know he has that huge ass mansion and his parents are away on some business trip so it’s gonna be a fucking good night.” You could practically hear him shaking with his excitement over the phone.

“Sweet, did anyone get any pick-me-ups?” You asked, closing your laptop and stretching your legs out.

“I didn’t ask but I’m sure someone has something.” He replied. “So be there in an hour and lets live it up.” And with that he hung up. No further information or even a goodbye, but that was Jungkook for you.

“Crazy bastard.” You mumbled under your breath before going to get showered and ready.

As you pulled up in your taxi to Namjoon’s house you could hear the music blaring from inside the car, you paid and thanked the driver before walking up to the doorstep. You had dressed up a little tonight, rocking a black skirt with black ankle boots and a jumper to keep it a little more casual, however you were showing a lot of leg, which wasn’t usually your style, but you had thought to change things up a little couldn’t hurt. As you pulled down on the handle you weren’t surprised the door was unlocked, stepping in to be hit with the smells of smoke, weed and alcohol you were a little taken aback not expecting the party to be in such full swing already. You could never quite believe how big Namjoon’s home was when you walked into it, it was huge with 4 floors and about 10 bathrooms, you had been here countless of times but every time it still shocked you, he wasn’t even the richest out of your small group of friends which was the even more surprising part, you knew Jin’s parents were just as well off and when you went to his house you really couldn’t believe who you were friends with having lived not the most privileged life. However the rest of them were not as rich, still rich by your standards but definitely not to this extent which had put you at ease when you just beginning to know them. Them. The 6 best friends you could have asked for, knowing them from childhood you had grown up with them and you were still as inseparable as the beginning.

You walked down the long hallway and saw a few people loitering on the grand staircase but you knew where to find your friends. As you went into the kitchen there they were sitting at the table, which could seat about 20 people, but it was just the 6 of them, sitting around with their drinks in their hands.

Taehyung was the first one to spot you and he gave you a small cheer

“Look who it is! I saved you a seat.” He said, patting his thigh.

You rolled your eyes, pulling up a chair beside Jin to see him lining himself up a line of something white.

“Is that coke? Are you going to share?” You asked nudging him slightly.

“No fucking way, this is the last of it, ask someone else.” He said.

You looked around to table to see them all looking at Jin.

“Jin what the fuck man, we always count on you to have shit, what do you mean that’s the last of it?” Jimin asked from across the table.

Jin looked up from intently splitting the powder into 2 thin lines his brows creased.

“You mean none of you have anything on you?” He said looking around at everyone as they all shook their heads.

“Hoseok I thought you got coke from that new dealer you met at that party?” Jin asked.

“Nah man turned out his product’s dodgy as fuck, I only trust the stuff you get and since you wont give us your dealers name…”

Jin let out a long sigh.

“Fine fine, I’ll call my dealer see if he can get me anything in the next hour, if not looks like we’ll be snorting alcohol tonight.” He said with a small chuckle.

“Oh fuck that, he better hook you up, this needs to be a great night.” Jungkook chimed in.

“You can have a good night without it you know.” You shot back.

“Yeah I don’t want a good night, I want a great night, call him Jin.”

Jin took a crisp 20 out of his pocket and began rolling it up.

“Jin! Please man I’m begging you.” Jungkook said again after receiving no response.

Jin put his face to the table running the makeshift tube up the line snorting it all at once with one huge sniff and he sat back one holding his other nostril taking a few more heavy sniffs and wiping at his nose.

“Okay fine.” He said breaking out a small smile.

You laughed so hard tears formed, there was something so darkly comical about the event that had just unfolded you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Since you’re the only one that finds me funny around here _____ you can have the other line.” He said passing it over to you.

You looked at him a little in disbelief, “Really? Fuck, thanks Jin.” You said before sniffing up the line in one swift movement.

You immediately felt the small rush to your head and broke into a small smile.

“Jin! Come one man this isn’t fair! You’re already having a good night and I’m not.”

Jungkook complained again and you smiled a little at his childish behaviour.

“I’m going I’m going. Let me give him a call.” Jin said pushing his chair back and standing up.

Before leaving the room Jin walked over to Jungkook, standing in front of him he stuck his palm out.

Jungkook looked at him confused.

“You going to pay for your share?” He asked, sounding serious.

Jungkook looked at him in disbelief, “What about everyone else?!” He asked, his voice rising in pitch. Everyone stayed silent, trying not to burst into laughter.

“I’ve got everyone else covered I just want your share.” He said.

Jungkook looked well…distressed for lack of a better word, reaching into his pocket he pulled out a crumpled 10, which Jin plucked out of his hands.

“Thanks man.” Jin said, a small smirk on his face before leaving the room.

Everyone laughed loudly, tears falling.

When Jin had returned to the room he gave everyone the thumbs up letting them know his dealer was on his way and would get him sorted in about an hours time.

“Jin man you have to give me your dealers number he sounds like an angel sent from heaven.” Hoseok said.

“A little coke angel.” Namjoon chimed in, which gave everyone at the table a small chuckle.

“No way I already told you all. None of you are getting his name or number, you’re all losers and he won’t want to deal to me if I introduce you to him.”

You knew you should have been offended but honestly you kind of knew what Jin was saying, he had always been the chilled, cooler one out of the 7 of you, people trusted and respected him because he just radiated that sort of aura, not to mention he was a little older than the rest of you.

Funnily enough no one argued back, Hoseok just gave a little sigh of defeat and went back to his beer.

As the night really began you were definitely having fun, the coke had really kicked in and you began drinking beer to add to your buzz.

You soon enough found yourself in the huge living room, which was insanely crowded, the music was the loudest in here and you soon found yourself up dancing in the middle of the room, which had kind of become a makeshift dance floor for the night. As you got up and began dancing with a few girls you knew, you spotted someone sitting on the edge of the couch who you had never seen before. He wasn’t looking in your direction but the pull you felt looking at him was indescribable. You had never seen someone so beautiful. You really studied him for a moment but you soon realised you didn’t know who he was, which was unusual for you considering you knew or had a least seen most of the people in here at least once before. Just before you went to focus you attention back to the girls - feeling a little stalker-ish for staring – he looked at you, scanning the room he locked eyes with you and you immediately glanced away, mentally cursing yourself out for staring.

As you focused you attention back on dancing you couldn’t help the heat that spread across your cheeks, you still felt like his eyes were burning into you and that was all you could think about. That was when you felt a pair of hands snake around your waist, you immediately turned only to be faced with Taehyung, he always got touchy with you when the both of you were drunk, and to be frank you behaved the exact same way.

“Hey sexy you come here often?” He asked with a small wink.

“Hm, sometimes what about you?” You said sliding your hands up around his neck feeling a little flirtier that usual, maybe it was the thought of the handsome stranger watching you.

Taehyung didn’t even need to reply, sliding his hands down and resting them at your hips and you began swaying back and forth with him.

After dancing for a while your mind went back to the guy you had saw and you wondered if he was still there, you glanced over to where he has been sitting only to see the space now empty.

“I’m gonna go pee.” You half yelled into Taehyung’s ear before manoeuvring through Namjoon’s large house.

When you finally reached the closest bathroom it was locked, typical. By the time you reached the 6th bathroom you knocked on the door only to be greeted with silence. As you turned to go to the next you one you heard the door opening and turned back around, so thankful you could finally pee.

You turned ready to thank whoever it was only to be stunned into silence to see it was the guy from earlier. You felt frozen in place, looking at him up close was a completely different experience; he really was as beautiful as you had first thought.

He was looking at you with such a cool calm demeanour you almost felt embarrassed about your thoughts.

“Sorry I just needed to use the bathroom.” You said almost choking on your own words. He gave you a small nod, and stepped to the side. You walked passed him to go into the bathroom and as you turned to close the door he was already walking back down the stairs.

Something in you wanted to call out to him and something in you did call out to him, you realised you didn’t know if he was staying or going and this could be only your chance.

“Sorry, excuse me! Do I know you from somewhere?” You asked.

He stopped mid step in the middle of the staircase.

He turned to look at you. “No, we’ve never met before me believe me, I’d remember.” The line itself was cheesy but he said in such a way you could have swooned.

“I’m _____- Wait actually can we do this after I pee? Wait there one second.” With that you closed the door, you were a little too drunk to even feel shame at this point so after peeing the fastest you could and washing your hands, you got out of the bathroom in record time. When you opened the door you heart dropped a little that he wasn’t there anymore but as you approached the stairs you saw him standing at the bottom of the staircase talking to none other than Jin.

“Hey...” You said cautiously as you approached them both.

Both of them turned to look at you and you stopped short of the bottom step, not really sure what you were interrupting.

“_____, hey, I’m just talking to Yoongi here, I’ll meet you downstairs.” Ah so the mystery man’s name was Yoongi. Jin was being curt with you and to be honest it irked you a little bit.

“Actually I’ve already met ______, we just had a nice chat.” He said a small smile on his face.

Jin’s eyes widened a little which confused you; you had chatted up plenty of guys at parties before what was different about this one?

Then it hit you.

This was Jin’s dealer.

You suddenly felt a little stupid, but were dealers supposed to be this attractive? You always pictured them as sketchy older men who always looked twitchy.

Jin was glaring at you and you knew exactly what he was getting at, he did not want you fucking around with his dealer.

You let out a small sigh before glancing over at Yoongi.

“I guess…I’ll see you around?” You said, making it sound like more of a question.

“I’m sure Yoongi has better things to do than-”

“Actually,” Yoongi interrupted, “I was going to stay a little while if that’s okay Jin, I saw a few people I recognised earlier downstairs, would be nice to catch up.” He stated.

Jin cleared his throat a little, “Yeah no problem Yoongi, stay as long as you like and thanks again for coming on such short notice.”

You realised you had really overstayed your welcome in their conversation as you turned and began walked down the stairs.

“_____!” Jin called from above you. “Your ass is showing, pull your skirt down.”

You felt your cheeks burn as you immediately grabbed your skirt and tugged it down, at least you were wearing a sexy red thong, Jin was lucky for the show, you just prayed to all the god’s Yoongi hadn’t seen.

About an hour had passed and you were back in the full swing of dancing, Taehyung had his hands all over you again and you didn’t even care, you were so coked up it was fucking shameful.

“You know,” Taehyung was whispering in your ear, “me and you would be so fucking good together.”

You were smiling, eyes closed, still dancing up against him.

You and Taehyung had always had this strange attraction growing up, he always told you he thought you were beautiful and the fact he was offensively gorgeous didn’t help. But you saw how he treated women – he would fuck them and never speak to them again, you told yourself that you weren’t going to be another one of his conquests.

However that didn’t stop you and him from being makeout buddies every now and again.

“Tae…” You whined as you felt his hands digging into your hips a little harder than usual, his actions were definitely getting to you, more than they usually did and you could feel your whole body begin to heat up.

He leaned in to kiss you and you imediately returned the kiss letting his tongue slide into your mouth, you began to run your hands through his offensively soft hair.

“Fuck, I want you so bad.” He said, his breathing heavy.

You wanted him too. Admittedly it had been a long time from you had gotten laid and to say you were fustrated was an understatement. But it was a bad idea and you knew that no matter how drunk you got.

“Hm, you can’t have me Tae. You know that.” You said, smiling at him solemly.

“Why is that beautiful? We’ve known each other forever, you could at least give me a little something, you know we’d be great together.” He replied looking at you with wide eyes.

“Taehyung, I like making out with you but I’m never going to go farther than that, there is no together with you, you’re a classic fuck boy, we’d have sex and you’d never look at me again.” You said, sighing heavily.

There was a short time when you had been hopelessy in love with Taehyung, he was beautiful and you had been young and stupid.

When you saw the sort of person he’d became your romantic love for him had slowly died out, knowing you never wanted that for yourself.

“You really think I’d do that to you? You’re my best friend _____.” He said, pouting his big beautiful lips.

You let out a short laugh, “That makes it worse, Tae, just drop it. I’m gonna go get another drink.” And with that you walked away from his embrace, you knew by the time you’d even reach the kitchen he will have already found a new girl to dance with. You loved him but god was he a player.

You found yourself sitting at the ridiculously big dining table once again, beer cradled in one hand as you looked around your surroundings, most of your friends where elsewhere but you could see Jungkook chatting up some beautiful girl out of the corner of your eye, you were feeling a little down and you realised it was because your high was slowly beginning to wear off, you needed another little pick-me-up you decided as you stood up in search of Jin.

You searched the place for him finally seeing him sitting on the couch in living room number two, deep in talk with none other than Yoongi – god damnit, there was no way you could approach that situation and not embarrass yourself, but your low was coming on strong and you knew your night was only going to get worse.

“Hey guys…” you wavered, both heards turning to look directly at you, pulled from their conversation.

“Jin can I see you for a second?” You asked casually, pulling at a strand of your hair, you didn’t know what was making you jittery, the drugs in your system or Yoongi looking at you so intensely you felt your cheeks burning, you must’ve looked like a damn tomato.

“Hey _____!” Jin smiled at you widely, he must’ve been more gone than you were.

“Me and Yoongi were talking about music, you like music too don’t you?”

You let out a small laugh, “Yeah Jin…I think most of of the population likes music.”

You heard Yoongi let out a airy laugh at your joke, although Jin just kep grinning up at you like he was making perfect sense.

“Okay then! So you talk to Yoongi while I go take a piss, perfect plan.”

Before you could even begin to protest Jin was already heading upstairs, so with nothing better to do and in your drunken state you decided to plant yourself beside Yoongi. You sat a little too close, as both your knees touched you sat forward, resting your chin on your hand.

“So I’m guessing you two were talking about…let me guess…music?”

Yoongi let out another small laugh, causing you to smile, you liked that sound a lot.

“Yeah… I was just telling Jin about how I like making music, producing ya know? I don’t think he understood a damn word I was saying tho, dudes so blitzed.”

It was your turn to laugh “I think everyone here is blitzed.”

“Yeah sometimes it’s hard being the only sober one at a party, but at least I can take videos of Jin if he decides to get shirtless and dance on the pool table again.”

You laughed loudly this time, “Fuck! Has he really done that before? Do you have pictures, I must’ve missed that one.”

“Sadly no, I didn’t take any I was too busy making sure he didn’t kill himself, I was just dropping something off to him, but no one was else was making sure he didn’t die, so I stuck around a bit.”

“Have you known him long? I can’t believe we’ve never met before.” You said, resting a hand on his knee.

You were being bold and forward and you knew that but you hoped he didn’t mind.

You couldn’t really tell however as he didn’t even react to your advances, simply responding to your question instead.

“A few years, yeah, you’ve probably never seen me, I don’t stick around, I’m usually working.”

“Ah.” You said knowingly, you didn’t know if it was awkward to bring up the fact that he dealt drugs but you also knew he had figured out by now you knew what his ‘work’ was.

Before you could say anything else Jins voice cut through the room as he made his way over to you both, you jerked your hand away from Yoongi’s knee, knowing it would do nothing but bring you trouble if he saw.

“So, did you guys talk?” He asked planting himself down beside you, a smile still on his face.

“Yeah-listen Jin I gotta go.” Yoongi said, his eyebrows low as he looked intensely at his phone.

Jin began to pout, “Stay Yoon, it’s been so long since we’ve talked like this.”

Yoongi smiled big at him and you heart nearly beat out of your chest then and there.

“Yeah, it’s been good Jin, but I gotta bounce. I’ll see you next time, okay?” When he began to stand up, you found yourself standing with him.

“I can show you out if you want.” You said, nerves completely overtaking you. You can’t remember the last time you really had to work for a guy’s attention like this, you were used to drunken gropes and getting to the sex bit quick enough, but that was all meaningless, drunken fumbles and hungover regrets.

You wanted Yoongi in a completely different way, and you couldn’t just let him walk out the door.

Yoongi nodded, and you walked in front of him making your way to the front door.

You stopped when you reached it, turning to face him, he stopped as well, looking at you, wondering why you stopped.

“I wanna see you again.” You said boldly, this wasn’t you, but you decided it was going to be your only chance.

Yoongi’s eyes widened in surprise at your confession and you shyly looked down at the ground, unable to meet his stare.

When you looked back up he was smirking, but it wasn’t smug.

“I’m really glad you said that.” He began “But wasn’t that guy you were dancing with your boyfriend?” He asked.

It was your turn to be surprised as you took a moment.

“Oh! You mean Taehyung? No, no he isn’t my boyfriend, he’s just a friend, he gets handsy when he’s drunk, to be honest so do I.”

“I noticed.” Yoongi shot back.

You let out a nervous giggle.

Yoongi was smiling fondly but his facial expression quickly turned hard and cold.

“I’m sorry, I’m being too forward, I just- I-” You began, but you were interrupted.

“I’m sorry, _____, it’s not you, I’ve enjoyed meeting you, a lot actually, but I’m not in the habit of getting to know women like you. I don’t live the safest of lives and I don’t like to drag anyone into it, I’m sorry…”

And with that he walked out the front door leaving you feeling cold and rejected.

As you walked back in you took a seat on the couch once again beside a very drunk Jin.

“You know,” he began holding up a single finger. “Yoongi is such a great guy…I have known him for so long.” He slurred.

“That’s nice Jin.” You said, not really wanting to talk anymore about Yoongi.

“He just got dealt a shitty hand you know, I doubt he ever wanted to be put in this situation, but if my dad was the head of some terrifying gang slash organisation slash whatever the fuck it is, I would put my head down and do whatever he asked as well.”

“Wait, what?” You asked, curiousity peaking.

“Yeah, I knew him from a class we took together a few years back, we were friends then, but he left college before the first year was out, I guess his dad didn’t approve, wanted him to stay in the family business, ya know? Such a bad situation for someone so intelligent, he had his whole life ahead of him…” He continued.

“You know he’s never even tried any drugs before? I guess when you grow up around that, you see enough to be put off…my heart aches for him sometimes…”

Jin was still talking but you could only hear bits and pieces, completely lost in your own thoughts.

The rest of the night was awful, you’d ended up leaving early, almost sober and mostly sad. You couldn’t believe what Jin had told you.

You still were in shock at Yoongi’s words to you aswell, maybe it was just genuine concern on his end…

But the point had been you wanted to get to know him.

You tucked yourself in not even bothering to remove anything but your shoes and fell into a deep but restless sleep.

Two weeks had passed since that party and for the most part Yoongi was entirely out of your mind, I mean after all you had barely known the guy and you weren’t gonna let one silly drunken moment bring you down.

It was Jin’s party that was on your mind for tonight. Your rich friends usually had some crazy party once a week but you only attended when you could, and tonight it was gonna be a good one.

“So Jin do you want me to come over early with some booze? I can help set up.” You said over the phone to your friend.

“Yes actually I would really appreciate that ______, it’s not like any of the other guys offer to help.” Jin said with a resigned sigh.

You let out a small laugh – “Cmon Jin, you’ve met them all, when would they ever offer to help for anything, lazy bastards.”

It was Jin’s turn to laugh this time, “You’re right I don’t know why I expect anymore from them, I may have grown up rich _____ but my parent’s made sure I knew how to respect those around me.”

You were nodding even though Jin couldn’t see, but he defintely was the most humble out of all the guys, he had been raised right.

“Shall we say 7? The party doesn’t kick off til 9 but you can come help me set up and we can drink in peace for a bit before the madness ensues.

You chuckled, “Sure thing Jinnie! See you later!”

You could almost hear the eyeroll over the phone before Jin hung up.

As you let yourself in – Jin had told you to do so – you took a second to appreciate the modern beauty of the house Jin lived in, it looked so bold and beautiful…very much like himself.

You tucked the bottle of vodka under your arm as you carried a bag of snacks in the other, you knew Jin didn’t need this, he was always more than prepared but you always felt strange showing up to his house empty handed, maybe it was the fact he had done so much for you.

“Honey I’m home!” You yelled from the hallway hoping Jin would reply and give an indication of where he was in this gigantic house.

You didn’t get a reply however. You furrowed your eyebrows in frustration heading for the kitchen so you could at least put the alcohol and snacks down.

However, as you neared the entrance for the kitchen the bag that was holding the snacks ripped, spilling all over the floor you groaned in frustration setting the bottle of vodka down, you got down on your knees and reminded yourself to stop asking for paper bags and just bring a tote with you.

“Fuck,” Was all you breathed out and you began picking things up.

As you started, a pair of hands joined the mission and you sighed in relief.

“I was wondering when you were gonna show your face, were you in there the whole time? You could have answered when I called also-“ You stopped dead in your tracks as you looked up and realised it was not Jin’s eyes you were looking into.

They were Yoongi’s.

“Uh- oh my god, you don’t have to help I’m sorry I’m an idiot I thought you were Jin, you know, I was thinking those were so not his hands but I carried on anyway I’m sorry again.” You were speaking from a place of sheer panic, you had no idea how to handle being this close to Yoongi, especially sober.

Looking at him was an entirely new experience, like you were seeing him for the first time all over again.

You were still scooping up the bags of snacks whilst Yoongi helped and as you stood up he stood up with you, his arms full now.

“I’m sorry-“

“You said that already, it’s fine, I’m not just gonna watch you struggle now am I?” He said with a slightest of smirks on his face. God he really was beautiful.

As you both entered the kitched you dumped the snacks in the corner of the counter. Of course Jin had an array of more expensive looking stuff already laid out, but it kept your mind at ease knowing you hadn’t shown up empty handed.

“Thank you for that.” You said, afraid to meet his gaze. “Why are you h-“ You cut yourself off, embarrassed you had even begun to ask that question, you knew why he was here.

“I mean- where’s Jin? Did he leave you here all alone?” You asked.

“He just had to run upstairs for a second, he should be down any minute.” Yoongi replied and you realised as he spoke he was checking you out.

He eyes skimmed over your body, quick enough that he wasn’t lingering but slow enough for you to notice.

You weren’t wearing anything fancy although you had to admit you had chosen these jeans because you loved the way they hugged your curves and your camisole had some cleavage on display.. but nothing major.

“Ah okay…well… I guess I’ll get started in the living room. Jin likes me to set up the playlists and everything, he says he doesn’t like the responsibility of being judged by the party music being bad.” You said with a small laugh.

Yoongi just nodded, looking at you with that intense stare. The atmosphere tense, you wanted any excuse to leave the kitchen.

“Maybe one day we can play some of yours!” You said, remembering the small conversation you had with him.

To your surprise Yoongi’s eyes widened. “You remember I said that?”

You nodded, “Of course, I know I wasn’t exactly a model for sobriety, but I wasn’t that bad!”

Then there it was. A smile. A genuine one with even a small laugh.

“Well I guess you weren’t as bad as Jin.”

Like a scene from a movie Jin walked into the kitchen right on cue,

“When was I bad? Why are you two talking about me? Also last question, why was there a bottle of vodka on the floor?” Jin asked holding up the forgotten vodka bottle you had set down when the snacks had spilled.

You merely laughed as you walked on past him, grabbing the bottle from his hands and headed for the living room.

As you played about with the sound system you had regrettably took a few large swigs from the bottle of vodka, trying anything to ease the anxiety you got around Yoongi. It wasn’t a bad anxiety per say, he just made you feel things you weren’t used to, which in turn made you queasy. So you figured getting a little buzzed would help take the edge off. Admittedly drinking vodka raw wasn’t your style, but you didn’t want to interrupt whatever they had to talk about, so here you were.

As you fiddled about with the bass and everything – admittedly you hadn’t one clue what you were doing but it was killing time – you took out your phone to open up your trustly party playlist, always a winner in your book when it came to house parties when you were suddenly interrupted by Jin’s voice.

You nearly jumped out your skin at how close he was.

“Jesus christ Jin! You couldve just called me from a distance there was no need to give me a heartattack!” You said, a little on edge. You knew why you were though.

“Sorry, I’m sorry, by any chance…have you got any cash on you?” Jin asked, “I’ve forgot to take some out of the ATM.”

You nodded, “Yeah I have like 40 on me, is that enough?”

Jin chuckled, then grew serious. “Of course not, look I’m going to have to drive to the nearest ATM, will you keep Yoongi company, I think he likes you and I trust you to be the only one who won’t act strange around him.”

God if only Jin knew what he was saying.

You gulped and looked up at him “Of course, but don’t be long.”

Jin simply nodded already making it for the front door.

“I should be back in 10!” He shouted from the hallway, not sure who to, maybe the both of you.

You took another big gulp of the vodka scrunching your face up at the way it burned down your throat.

As you decided the best thing was to turn back to the sound system you heard Yoongi clear his throat, letting you know he had came into the living room.

“Hi, sorry…I’m trying to figure this stupid thing out, I act like I know what I’m doing, but in reality, I’m clueless.” You said with a sheepish smile and burning cheeks.

Yoongi looked at you crouched on the floor and returned the smile, “Well maybe I can help…this is probably all I know how to do.”

He crouched down beside you and you felt the heat radiate off him with how close he was, sides almost touching he reached his hands out to the many buttons on the system. He definitely seemed to know what he was doing, you wondered if his fingers were as skilled in other areas…

You shook the idea from your mind trying not to look as flustered as you felt.

“I think that should do it…” Yoongi said, standing up. You stood up with him looking up at him. He wasn’t by any means tall, but compared to you he still had a few good inches.

“Are you gonna play something?” He asked.

You nodded, pulling out your phone and connecting it up to the speaker.

You hit shuffle on your playlist and nodded enthusiastically when the song came out sounding great just the right amount of bass and whatever else it was called.

“Thank you this sounds amazing, Jin will be impressed, as I am going to take sole credit for this.”

Yoongi pouted and you swore your heart skipped a beat.

“What exactly do I get then?” He asked.

“Anything you want.” You stated, boldy. You knew the vodka was beginning to hit as only the drunker side of you would say something like that.

Yoongi’s entire demeanour darkened at your words, he was 100% picking up what you were putting down, he was looking at you like a damn meal and you honestly loved it.

He shifted back to his neutral expression clearly shaking himself out of whatever daze he had been.

“Maybe I’ll steal some snacks on my way out here.” He joked.

You couldn’t help but pout a little, slightly frustrated that he had changed the topic.

His words from the other night rang in your ears.

He said he didn’t like to drag anyone into his life, condering it was dangerous; what he did for a living.

You knew it was probably not the best thing in the world for you to want a drug dealer this bad, but he seriously held no qualities of one, he was just as normal as any other guy, well, except for the fact he was so hot he made your head spin.

But what if you didn’t really care about all that? Although in all honestly it did scare you a little…but what if you wanted to risk getting to know him?

You were annoyed now, annoying yourself with your thoughts, your mood had soured fast.

“Yeah do whatever you want.” You said offhandedly, turning to walk back into the kitchen.

He was following you, you could hear him behind you, but you refused to turn around, it was hard acting like you weren’t bothered though, considering you were.

When you finally made it to the kitchen you kept your back to him, setting cups out and trying your hardest to make it look like you were busy.

You heard Yoongi sigh.

“Did I say something to hurt you?” He asked, but you could tell by his tone that he was on the defense as well.

“No.” You replied curtly, you knew what you were doing, you knew you were being a child but you couldn’t help yourself. You honestly embarrassed yourself trying to basically throw yourself at him but he shut you down everytime.

You knew how to take a hint, you needed to leave whatever it was you two had alone, you didn’t want to do anything that would cause him to be uncomfortable, although he had definitely gave you some hints that this wasn’t a one-sided thing.

“God, Jin’s taking a lot longer than he said he would, right?” He said. You couldn’t see his face but you knew he was grabbing at anything to make the situation less tense.

“Yeah, I’m sure he’ll be back soon though.” Was all you could say.

As if on cue once again, your phone pinged in your back pocket, you pulled it out and saw it was Jin texting you.

7:47PM

Jinnie – i am stuck in traffic, tell yoongi i am sorry, will hopefully be another 15mins!

You put your phone back in your pocket and looked up at Yoongi finally, he was rubbing the back of his neck and looking at the ground, clearly distracted.

“That was Jin,” Yoongi lifted his head. “He said he’s stuck in traffic, going to be another 15 minutes, can you wait that long?”

Yoongi took a second to think before nodding “Yeah I have time.”

You turned your back again, looking at how everything was set out you took another couple of minutes to reorganise and pour some more snacks out into bowls, you honestly didn’t know why Jin went through all this trouble but you weren’t gonna judge him.

As you went to start mixing a cocktail in a bowl, you heard a voice directly behind you.

“You need any help? I feel bad just sitting there.”

You jumped a little and when you spun around you couldn’t believe how close he was to you.

You were silent, just looking at him for a second and he seemed to be doing the same thing.

“I think I’m oka-“ And just like that he cut you off mid sentence, only instead of using words, it was his lips on yours.

He pulled away after a quick kiss, trying to gauge your reaction, you searched for any hint of doubt on his face and you think he was doing the same, when you saw none you pulled him in again for a kiss once again.

You immediately wraped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you.

Yoongi obliged – pushing you a little until your back hit the kitchen counter, pinning you between it and him.

He was kissing you slowly, and it was setting your whole body on fire, he brought his hands to your hips and you took that your cue to slip your tongue inside his mouth, he lightly sucked on it.

You moaned into his mouth, loving every sensation his was giving you.

Yoongi moaned back into your mouth, pushing his body close to yours.

He finally pulled away to catch his breath and you did the same, your head was in the clouds, it had been so long since someone had kissed you like that.

Yoongi spoke first, “I’m sorry about that – I know what I said to you the other night, but you have no idea how crazy you’re driving me.”

“Hmm.” Was all you could say, too dazed to think of a proper reply.

You don’t know who started kissing who again, but this time there was no mercy. You kissed each other so desperately that you even let out a small squeal of laughter when Yoongi lifted you up so you were perched on the counter, he moved in between your legs and you boldly wrapped them around his waist, pulling his as close as you could.

“Fuck, I – jesus –” Yoongi muttered between kisses.

You shushed him, trying to encourage him to keep doing what he was doing.

You were both panting heavy, so hot and turned on it was sinful.

You had just began kissing again, completely unaware of the passing of time, when the sound of the front door closing made you both jump.

Yoongi moved away from you and you jumped down from counter, fixing your clothes and hair as quick as you could, you prayed you didn’t look a hot mess as much as you felt it.

You looked over at Yoongi who had took a seat at the kitchen island, you could see his chest still rising and falling and you couldn’t help but giggle a little.

He simply smirked at you and you really couldn’t keep it together as you heard Jin approaching you turned your back to try and make the cocktail you were about to start, you needed a distraction.

When Jin walked in, you heard Yoongi stand up.

“Hey sorry Yoongi, traffic was crazy.” Jin began.

“It’s fine man don’t worry about it, me and _____ were just talking.” He said, as cool and as casual as if that what you both really had been doing.

You were pretty sure if you turned around your face was going to reveal everything Jin didn’t know.

You took a second to catch on what was going to happen and you made yourself scarce, running for the living room with a quick “Excuse me.”

As you sat on the sofa, you pulled out your phone to see you had a missed call for Taehyung, probably wanting to know when the best time was to show up.

You sent him a quick text instead of calling him back.

8:05PM

You: hey tae, party will probably start around 9ish? i think… i forgot to ask Jin actually x

You phoned pinged almost instantly

8:06PM

Taehyung (hottest guy alive): okay i’ll leave in an hour then, see u soon ! x

You sighed a little, you kept forgetting to change Taehyung’s contact name, he had took your phone and made the change when you were at a party with him, you had laughed about it, you never made any effort to change it either.

“Hey.” You suddenly heard from behind you, farther away this time, it had you standing up and spinning around.

Yoongi was standing in the doorway.

“Hey yourself. Please don’t tell me you’re leaving.” You said, walking closer to him.

If you had it your way, he would be fucking you on this sofa right now.

You playfully tugged at his belt buckle, trying to pull him into the living room.

“Come say bye.” You said, looking up at him, eyes full of lust.

You leaned in to kiss him and he returned it, but only for a few seconds.

You never took your hands off his belt, keeping him securely in place.

“Listen, I have to go. I can’t stay, I told Jin I’d let myself out.” He said.

You audibly whined, you were so horny you could’ve cried.

“Fuck, please don’t make that sound…I don’t think I can drive with a hard on.”

You stomach flipped and your core throbbed all at once.

So he was taking it …there.

“Well, I could always help you out in that department you know…” You trailed off.

Yoongi took a deep breath and closed his eyes, clearly trying to compose himself.

“God, you are making me crazy, you know that?” He asked, you knew he wasn’t really looking for an answer but you shook your head anyway, trying to play coy.

“What if Jin saw us like this? I’m pretty sure he would kill me and then kill you.”

You laughed at his statement.

“He wouldn’t kill me, he likes me too much.” You stated.

Yoongi scoffed a laugh.

“Okay that’s fair enough but I really do have to go, give me your number I’ll text you.” He said, taking his phone from his pocket.

You called out your number and he saved the contact.

You didn’t ask for his, if he really wanted to text you he would.

You walked him to the front door.

“I guess we can talk later? About what it is we’re actually doing?” You asked, hopeful.

Yoongi nodded. “Of course. I’ll see you soon.”

And with that, he was gone.

A few hours had passed and the party was in full swing. You were nicely drunk and you were enjoying swaying back and forth as the music flooded your senses.

You had opted to take no heavy drugs, wanting to not be so blitzed incase Yoongi decided to text you before the night was out.

You were dancing when you felt a very familiar pair of hands snake around your waist.

“Has anyone ever told you how fucking great your ass looks in those jeans?” Taehyung whispered in your ear.

You shook your head no. “Well, I’m here to tell you, your ass looks fucking great in these jeans.”

As he started peppering kisses on your neck you pulled away from him.

“Not tonight Tae, I’m not in the mood.” You said, you couldn’t, knowing you had only kissed Yoongi a few hours prior.

Taehyung raised his hands in defence, stepping back a little, one of his redeeming qualities – he actually listened.

“My bad, so who’s the guy?” He asked.

You made your way to the couch and he followed suit.

“What guy?” You asked.

“You never let me kiss you at parties if you have some guy on your mind, so who is he?” He asked again.

You shook your head, “There is no guy…” You knew you were a shitty liar, but what were you supposed to say?

Taehyung laughed. “Okay fine, if you don’t wanna talk about him yet I get it.”

You hit his shoulder playfully. “There is no guy jackass!”

“Okay I believe you!” Taehyung said and if his tone of voice was anything to go by he definitely did not believe you.

You scoffed, “I am going to pee.”

“Okay I am going to find a new dance partner.” And with that you both went your separate ways.

As you made you way up the stairs and found a bathroom, as soon as you closed the door your level of drunk really hit you, what was it about bathrooms that did that?

Enjoying the quiet for a second you pulled your phone out of your back pocket and saw that you had a message from an unknown number.

You let out a small noise of excitement.

11:37PM

Unknown: hey guess who?

You quickly saved his contact.

11:52PM

You: heyyyyyyyyyyyy i knwo who u are ;)

You got a little excited as you saw that he was replying immediately.

11:53PM

Yoongi: hahaahahah how drunk are you exactly?

You: Come to jins party and see,, im not that dru nk

Yoongi: What exactly would happen if I were to come?

You: i cant even pretend to play coy,,, i would suck your dick and beg you to fuck me :)

You saw the dots rapidly disappearing and reappearing. You laughed out loud, he was clearly at a loss for words.

You wanted him to know you wanted him badly, you needed him to know.

11:56PM

Yoongi: fuckdkkck, that is so hot u are so hot, u know that whole time you had your back to me i was just satring at ur ass in those jeans,.,.,, also the night we first met.. ur skirt had rid up and you were wearing that red thong..,fuck i couldve ruined u then and there..

You paused, remembering what had happened, you thought only Jin had seen that, but knowing Yoongi had seen it riled you up so much you thought you were going to explode.

You: yoongi please come here i am so horny pleasseeeeeeeee

Yoongi: fucl

Yoongi: fukc i want too but i cant im working im sorry

You left the bathroom, walking up more stairs heading for Jin’s room, you wanted some peace and quiet… and somewhere more private to sext…

Jin’s room was super off limits at his parties, but you knew he wouldn’t mind you being there.

As you walked in, you kicked off you shoes and propped yourself up against the headboard, phone in hand you smiled as you typed your text.

12:01AM

You: god that sucks so much, i would loveee to pick up where we left off,,

Yoongi: i know :(

Boldly, you switched your phone to its camera. You shoved off your jeans and took a picture of your hand lingering at the waistband on your black laced underwear.

You hadn’t been lying when you said you were horny, you felt insatiable.

You sent the pic, biting your nail in apprehension, this was definitely a bold move for you, but you wanted to get him as frustrated as you felt.

As he took a a little while to reply you started to panick, maybe you had been to hasty.

You phone pinged and you couldn’t unlock It fast enough.

12:05AM

Yoongi: are you kidding me right now? Where are you? fuck that is the hottest thing i have ever seen

You couldn’t help but move your hand under your underwear, running a finger down your slit you couldn’t believe how wet you were.

You: im in jins room… its off limits but i couldn’t help myself, if u could feel how wet i am…..

Yoongi: FUCK

Yoongi: are u touching urself rn???

You: maybe……

Yoongi: jesus hold on.

You gasped slightly when your phone began to ring. Why was he calling you… was he mad?

You answered tentatively.

“Hello?” You said, confusion in your tone.

“Will you let me talk you through it?” Was all Yoongi asked, his voice sounding so deep and husky it only turned you on more.

“Talk me through what?” You asked innocently.

“The orgasm I want you to give yourself.”

Fuck.

“Yes.” You pratically moaned, applying a little pressure to your clit out of the excitement alone.

“Take your panties off completely, spread you legs, get comfortable.” He ordered.

You did as he asked, panting heavily.

“Okay, how wet are you?” He asked.

“I am so fucking wet, can’t stop thinking about you kissing me.” You replied.

Yoongi cursed under his breath.

“Okay, put two fingers in then, put the phone on speaker, set it beside you.” You did as he asked.

As you inserted your fingers you let out a little cry at the relief, you had been craving this all night, granted you wanted it to be Yoongi’s dick…

“Feels good.” Was all you could manage to say, closing your eyes tight.

“Okay fuck yourself slowly, rub your clit slowly as well.”

You eyes nearly rolled into the back of your skull.

You moaned in pleasure, completely in awe of how he was talking to you, he was a fucking pro.

“Want your cock,” you said breathily. “Want your cock in me so fucking bad.”

Yoongi was breathing heavy on the other line. “Fuck fuck – I know I wish I was there so bad. I’d fucking wreck you.”

You only moaned louder at his dirty talk.

“Start moving your fingers faster, put a little more pressure on your clit for me.” He said, hardly able to keep his voice steady.

“Fuck! I think I’ll cum soon.” You said as you did what he asked.

“Hm so soon? God you must be so fucking needy baby.”

You could only moan at his pet name for you.

You loved being called baby, god you wanted him.

“Keep going, I wanna hear you cum.” He spurred you on.

You were losing yourself. Your orgasm was coming on so quick you were chasing it.

“_____? Are you close?”

“Ah- fuck- yes! I’m so close.” You said, it was really all you could manage.

“Cum for me, fucking let go, god you are so fucking hot, rub your clit, I bet it’s so swollen, just begging to be sucked on.”

Jesus christ you were going to explode.

You gave yourself a few hard quick strokes before you pulled your fingers out and focused solely on rubbing your clit until you came so hard you were seeing stars.

“Fuck fuck fuck, I’m coming, I’m coming so fucking hard – fuck!”

You were silent for a minute, trying to come back down after your orgasm hitting you with such a force.

As you came too you had completely forgot Yoongi was on the other end.

“______ are you okay?”

You grabbed the phone putting it against your ear.

“Yoongi jesus christ.” You said.

Yoongi chuckled on the other end.

“You just came so hard you were pratically screaming. Let’s hope the party guests didn’t hear you.”

Oh fuck, you had completely forgot where you were.

“I just came on Jin’s bed.” You said biting your lip.

“Yeah you did and it was probably the hottest thing I’ve ever heard, I wish I had’ve been there.”

You were visibly pouting even thought he couldn’t even see you.

“Next time.” You said.

“Next time?” He repeated.

“Next time.” You confirmed.

“Fuck… listen I’ve got to go, I wish I could talk more, I don’t like doing that then just hanging up, but I’m really busy. I can call you tomorrow.”

You smiled at how genuinely sincere he sounded.

“It’s fine, we’ll talk to tomorrow. Bye Yoongi.”

“Bye _____.” He said, something else in his tone…you hoped it wasn’t regret.

And with that he hung up leaving you to clean yourself up and try and fix Jin’s bed, it wasn’t THAT bad, well maybe except for the small (not that small) wet patch.

Part 2

#bts smut #yoongi smut #yoongi x reader #bts x reader #bts fanfction #my writing

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buckyalpine · 2 years ago

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Cheating!Steve x reader, Bucky x reader

Oh look, more cheating Steve with sweetheart Bucky to save us

A/N: Last year someone asked me for some mad angsty fic and I posted and deleted it so quick because it was god awful. Just awful. However, I had kept a draft of it cause even though I hated it and everything about it, I didn't want it gone forever. Upon rereading it recently...I kinda like it. So I decided to change some stuff (like most of the entire plot), switch around characters (I'm a Bucky girl) and repost. If you want to see the OG fic, I can post it again or just edit this to add it under the new version

Steve couldn't stand seeing you like this. In the hospital room, the needles prodding you, it all reminds him of hydra and the things he had seen on numerous missions. When you almost die, he's thrown back into the spiral where he has no hope for a future. And nothing changes after you get better. You had almost died once. Missions were getting riskier and you weren't always in the clear. In his mind, everything good in his life leaves him or gets ripped away eventually. Peggy was a prime example of that. It's just a matter of time.

Even in your injured state, your attention was all on Steve. You knew how much he hated seeing you hurt. It sent him into a dark place few people had witnessed. As soon as your eyes fluttered open, your tired eyes met his red rimmed, puffy ones. For days, every time you try to bring him back to you, he has his walls built up again.

He won't let himself love you more.

He drinks.

He drinks enough to get drunk. It takes bottle after bottles but he doesn't care. He doesn't care about anything any more. So much so, he decides to seek the warmth of someone else.

Because you almost left him.

You could die so easily.

You almost did.

Nothing matters any more. His moans of pleasure are empty but he's wrapped around her none the less. He doesn't stop until his body can't move, too exhausted to even think about guilt.

You have it all planned out. You were finally released from the hospital and the first thing you wanted to do was spend time with Steve. The team had left the compound so you could set up a movie night for you and the captain, you don't want to let him slip from your grasp, not after all you'd been through together. You didn't go through hell and back to lose him like this. You fought for your life to pull through.

There are snacks laid out on the table, a movie pulled up, some hot chocolate made just for you and him. You shuffle nervously, your heart beating erratically. You didn't spend 4 years with him just for this to end because you nearly died. No. He was worth the fight. His cold demeanor was not towards you but towards the fear of losing you. And that fear was from love. Love you both shared deeply for each other.

You knew he got back from the bar late; if he was too drunk then you'd help him to his room and talk to him in the morning. It was a new habit of his but you understood.

Except he never came. He always made it home. Not tonight.

Steve stumbled in the next morning, rubbing his eyes, seeing a small sleeping form on the sofa, snacks and some drinks laid out in the living room. He swallowed thickly when he sees you get up from the couch wearing one of his hold hoodies, making your way towards him.

"Steve?"

You have a soft smile on your face, but it drops when you get a closer look at him. Tears prickle at your eyes when you see the way his neck is littered in bruises, his skin still flushed. He can't look you in the eyes, not after what he'd just done.

"I-

You freeze before him, you don't want to ask. You don't want to know. The broken expression his face is enough for you. You wordlessly leave the living room, locking yourself in, giving FRIDAY instructions to make sure no one can enter.

"Did you talk to y/n" Bucky asks excitedly when he sees Steve sitting in the living room. He knows how excited you were about the movie night, spending days planning every last detail. His excitement drops when he sees the food untouched and you're nowhere to be seen. "Where is she?"

Steve remains silent, staring at his hands. The rest of the team enter the living room, hoping to find you both curled on the couch, but no. Nat's eyes narrow when she sees the hickeys on Steve's neck but something tells her they're not from you, you've never marked him like that before, you've always been so gentle with him.

"How could you?" She hissed, while the rest of the team look at her in confusion. It doesn't take long for them to piece things together. And it's a mess.

You come down to the living room, both Sam and Tony holding Bucky down on the couch while he glares at Steve, his hands still in fists. They all turn towards you with broken eyes, this is not what they ever wanted for you. The second he sees you, he breaks down. You're numb to his cries, his pleas.

He finds you leaving the compound at 1:00 AM from where he's still seated on the couch, something you'd never done before.

"Baby? Where are you going"

You ignore him, making your way to the garage. You were never able to sleep since and staying in bed only left you alone with your thoughts.

"I-I need some space. Don't worry about where I'm going"

"Y/n, please, just let me explain"

"No"

"I made a mistake, I-

"I don't care. I just want need some air"

"Promise me you'll come back?"

You shake your head, you can't even look at Steve. You scoff, shoving past him, not caring when he hisses in pain. His cheek is bruised, spots of dark purple and blue bloom around his eye and you'd seen Nat icing Bucky's hand earlier.

"Y/n, please angel, I-I just want to talk, just promise me you'll come back?"

"I promise" You reluctantly mumble, hopping on your motor bike and speeding off before Steve can call after you again.

You loved him so much.

You fought so hard to pull through for him, you heard every word he'd said to you when you were unconscious.

Tears clouded your vision.

It all happens too fast for you to comprehend.

The car doesn't see you.

The bend is sharp.

You bike is sent over the edge.

Darkness.

It's been a week.

You still haven't woken up.

It's all his fault. It doesn't matter that the driver was intoxicated. It didn't matter that it was dark out. You wouldn't have left the compound if he hadn't done what he did and it eats him alive.

He's not met with any sympathy.

No one bats an eye at his tears or sobs, too concerned about your well being to go and comfort him. Like clock work, every member of the team visits on rotation since they can't all be there at once. however Bucky is exempt from all hospital rules with one brooding, grumpy stare.

Bucky is by your side every single day. He doesn't say anything when Steve grips your hand, praying for you to wake up, silently praying himself while your heart monitor continues to beep. Steve refuses to move from your side but he's not given much of a choice when Fury summons him personally for someone mission related.

He's only gone for a few hours but that's when you finally stir. Bucky is on his feet instantly, paging for the doctor while stroking your hair.

"Hey pretty girl" Bucky whispers when your eyes finally focus, the knuckles of his metal hand gently caressing your cheek. The cool sensation helps you feel more alert. You smile seeing his baby blue eyes, feeling safe as he talks to you softly.

Everything hits Steve all at once. He didn't just betray you. He betrayed the team. His bestfriend. Himself. All the people who had faith in him to make the right choice, to do the right thing, to protect them. And he threw it away. Everyone waited a month for you to fully recover before throwing a welcome back party so you'd actually be able to enjoy it. Steve looked back longingly at the happy group gathered together in the living room, more emotions hitting him again.

He was happy you were alive. His sweet, sweet girl pulled through. H

He was envious of the love everyone was sharing, one he wasn't privy to anymore. He was invited, he was still apart of the team after all but he knew it wasn't his place.

He was jealous.

Jealous of the way you melted into Bucky's side. Longing to feel that warmth that he used to feel himself. Bucky had his arm around your waist, keeping you tucked right by him, taking care of you long after you were discharged. He wasn't going to stop any time soon.

There was something between you two, everyone could sense it. The soft gazes at each other and innocent kisses. Bucky wouldn't let a day go by without pressing his lips to your cheek, your nose, your forehead, the top of your head. He needed you to know you were loved and cared for. He stuck to his guns, claiming his actions were purely platonic but the pink blush on his cheeks proved that he was a bald faced liar.

Steve knows theres no one to blame but himself. He sighs and swallows the lump in his throat as you stand on your tiptoes to kiss the brunette, sealing you both together forever. He's always thought it would be the two of you standing together at the alter but how things had changed. The cheers of the crowd are a dull buzz to him. He watches Bucky swoop in for another kiss, this time dipping you and capturing your lips sweetly.

"I love you Mrs. Barnes"

"I love you more, Mr. Barnes"

Your happy, love struck giggles cause the first tear to fall.

He does his best to smile when you both walk by, flashes of what your wedding would have looked like. The white dress. The veil. The flowers.

if only he never-

But it was too late.

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ohandcounting · 3 months ago

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Getting The Most Out Of Deltarune Chapters 1+2+3+4: A Guided Experience.

Experience Deltarune the same way we did as it was releasing

Want to read this as a google doc instead?

If you are the rare person who heard about Deltarune (the parallel story to Undertale, by Toby Fox!) through the recent Nintendo Switch 2 Direct, this is for you. This is also a good resource for anyone that's just been out of the loop, or wants to make sure they've "seen it all" before getting to the next chapter.

It details not just what to play before Deltarune's new release content, but also has tips to make sure you don't miss anything important while getting through it without wasting time and detailing what happened between releases so you can go in with the same full experience I've had waiting for it to release for the past 7 years. The best time to get started was 2015, the second best time is now. All of it is below this read more, and it comes with only the necessary spoilers to save you some time. You can read it all in one go before starting any of the games, if you want. It's like, 10 years of stuff in here though. Take your time. If I missed anything, tell me and I'll edit it in. The best way to read this post is on my blog so you can see any of these edits. Feel free to share this around, make a video essay where you just read this off word for word, and/or repost it in any other fashion. I just want people enjoying the games! Credit is appreciated of course.

The Undertale Essentials

Go play Undertale! (you can skip any steps you've done before) It's on Steam, Xbox, Playstation, Switch. You can find android mobile ports of it pretty easily too, apparently. You can find a way to play it, I promise.

Just get to the end however you want, it largely doesn't matter what you do since a large appeal of the game is it reacting to your decisions. But if you get an encounter with no enemies, that means you've killed enough of them to activate an optional mode that skips a lot of the normal stuff in the game. So I would quit out to reload your save in that instance. You absolutely need to experience the game that started it all because a lot of Deltarune's enjoyment comes from the knowledge you'd have after playing this game first! Including the music! Don't mute the game just because you think the Ruins music is kinda mid!

Play Undertale...Again! This time, you need to be going for the True Pacifist Ending. Which just means you do all the important side quests, and don't kill anyone at all.* Don't worry about this being boring, there's actually plenty of unique dialog for a second playthrough.** If you don't super-kill The Flower™ from the trailer and all the marketing during a playthrough, he'll give you tips and hints on how to do it without having to look up a guide after the normal final boss. But really just try and maximize the dialog you see in this playthrough and you should get it. Just make sure you pour water on the blue lady after she passes out in the lava area, if you leave the screen on accident before pouring the water on her it locks you out of a side quest and you'll have to load a save from before the boss fight. If you save after this, that means you have to start all the way over...again again! *If you never killed anyone in your first playthrough and didn't lock yourself out of any important side quests, you can just hit continue to load into the room before the finale, and go back to do the side stuff you missed. **If you can't tell that the dialog is new, that means you can't complain about it being boring since you didn't remember the original dialog anyways! (This is a spiteful remark towards my biological older sister)

Play Undertale...Again Again Again! In step 1, I mentioned an optional mode that skipped a lot of the normal parts of the game. Well now you're going to do that on purpose, by not fighting an area's boss until you've exhausted the encounter limit. It's one of my favorite parts of the game to play. This can only be done by Fighting enemies until they fall to ashes before you, and stop showing up entirely. After the first area, save points start giving you an enemy count so you can't miss them on accident. Do this for the whole game, and you'll be able to reach The Final Conclusion to Undertale.

...Or...

You could watch someone else do it. (Don't click that out of curiosity if you're not at this step yet, it starts with super spoilers for the True Pacifist Ending!) This video playthrough features no commentary and uses YouTube's chapters feature, allowing you to skip through the monotonous enemy grinding if you just want to see what's new. Not everyone wants to do this playthrough, for obvious reasons.

This step might feel optional, but it's so important that I would highly recommend watching the video if you don't want to play it yourself. (You can check the end of this video yourself even if you played it, as this ending does change some things in other parts of the game!)

Congratulations! You've now finished The Undertale Essentials! (or you already did all of this like 10 years ago) Time to move on to...

The Extracurriculars!: Part 1

I don't believe any of this section is skippable if you want to really get the most out of Deltarune, despite the name. Feel free to use this time to think about Undertale even more, on a deeper level. These are events that happened between Undertale and the surprise release of Deltarune Chapter 1. Starting with...

The UNDERTALE Anniversary Q&A

Just make sure you read those instructions! It's not very long, so you could read it all in a single bathroom break.

The UNDERTALE 2nd Anniversary Alarm Clock announcement

This has since been cancelled, but it has some unique dialog for the characters found nowhere else. Again, very short.

The trailer for UNDERTALE's Switch release I guess?

This one is just funny, I really like this trailer. It didn't even release for the third anniversary on time outside of Japan. However, there is a fan favorite Exclusive Boss Fight and also Whatever This Is (<- 1/100 chance) that you'll miss if you didn't play the game on Switch! These are essential to know about going forward, as it's effectively two entirely new characters.

Here's the Exclusive Dog Shrine for the Playstation release, which is...Not Important...I'm watching this just now for the first time and it kind of sucks...badly. Okay just this one is skippable.

The Deltarune Essentials: Chapter 1

I want to take a moment to set the mood here for you. We just had the Switch release for Undertale, for the third anniversary. Nobody is expecting anything from Toby, who's now a multi-millionaire off of game sales alone (official merch comes from Fangamer, I wouldn't look at it yet though as you might run into spoilers) and if he does release anything else, we expect it to be just his "next project."

Then, the morning of October 30th, the day before Halloween, the official Undertale account tweets this and this. (<- start that one at the bottom I formatted it wrong) Then, after waiting a full 24 hours and finally downloading the new thing it greets you with THIS terrifying premise. We were terrified!

Now, after reading that, it is finally time for...

Playing Deltarune! But just chapter 1. It's free! After installing it, if it's the steam version, right click it and open up the "properties..." menu. Then go down to Betas and set it to "chapter1.2.lts.test - 11-25-24" to make sure you're playing the latest version, if you can't it's not a big deal but this does make some changes that will be in the final game. Meaning it's just a way to play the final-ish version of chapter 1+2 a bit early!

It's your first playthrough, just do whatever you like. It's only a single chapter rather than an entire game, so replaying it won't take nearly as long even if you mess something up. I will warn you though, you will need at least 90 minutes in a row after fighting the final boss of Card Castle to complete the next section that has no save points. This is, technically, for the best. You'll see. But please, for your own sake, do not start Chapter 2 yet. I promise, it's worth it.

Playing Deltarune But Just Chapter 1...Again! Or don't. While I do personally recommend playing through it again and doing the opposite of what you did the first time, that's not really important. At least not that we can tell yet. What you will want to do is load your first save file, and then making sure you have the White Ribbon armor item and watching the chapter 1 portion of this guide (it starts in partway through the video to avoid spoilers, make sure you stop the video before he starts talking about Chapter 2) to make sure you didn't miss anything important for Chapter 2! You will need to get to the ending cutscene again to make sure any changes to your file transfer to Chapter 2 properly.

This is just a general playthrough tip: When you're in town, you can just go all the way down to the bunker at the south-most area first thing. This will let you explore through the town in "layers", making it hard to miss anything that isn't hidden (the guide does mention the hidden part of the town!) Really, the most important part is just talking to sinks before anyone else in the room though.

Now that you've finished Chapter 1, it's time for...

The Extracurriculars!: Part 2

At this point, you're probably thinking to yourself "Why should I wait? Why would I not just go into the next part of the game now? Why do all these extra parts?" The simple answer is, Deltarune uses its Chapter releases to give you time to think about it. Probably, too much time, given the way some of us react to it. But this does play into its strengths as a series, giving us tidbits and mysteries to dive into. Trying to predict and figure out what's being foreshadowed and find the characters hidden and all the little interactions you could of missed. This really is the true strength of the series, and why people love talking about it. There's so much to find, there's almost always more you haven't seen.

This section covers the events that happened between chapters 1 and 2 of Deltarune. It's honestly quite a doozy, but less of it as vital as last time. Starting with:

Toby Fox talking about his thoughts on the game he's been working on since 2012.

Yeah, it turns out Deltarune started development before he even started working on Undertale. This is more or less unimportant if you don't care about Toby Fox or the creation of the game.

Honestly a lot of what's here and between the 5th Anniversary is mostly little tweets here and there. If you DO care about a little behind the scenes stuff, you'll just have to open the Toby Fox's twitter account and scroll down until you see the big blue "Windows protected your PC" images because everyone's PC's thought he was releasing a virus because he called the game "SURVEY_PROGRAM" lol. (then you can start scrolling up to see the stuff!)

Also the Chapter 1 Demo released on Switch with a very funny trailer

Seriously though, it's all just other stuff he's worked on, jokes, behind the scenes/scrapped content, or previews for chapter 2 which you're about to play anyways.

This all changed on the 5th anniversary however...

THE UNDERTALE 5th Anniversary Orchestra Concert

This doesn't have much exclusive in it (excluding the music itself, of course) other than a commercial for some merchandise that was released on the 5th anniversary. There are also some piano covers from Toby Fox himself at the 3:03:00 mark, including a song you might not have heard yet. It's a very fun listen and watch, but it isn't vital if you just care about the story and characters instead of the music. Somehow. (If you played through the game muted you're doing it wrong [Unless you're deaf. Sorry.])

The UNDERTALE 5th Anniversary Alarm Clock Dialog

Unlike the other alarm clock dialog, this is actually very entwined with the characters, to the point where despite it being their Undertale versions, it actually gives insight for their Deltarune versions as well. A very important read, if you ask me, and very enjoyable if you just like the characters. Not nearly as short as last time, but it's sectioned so you can come back to your spot easily if you get interrupted.

The UNDERTALE 5th Anniversary Deltarune Status Update

This is more or less just talking about how far along chapter 2 was, and why it's been taking so long! Non-vital if none of that interests you, but there are some cool screenshots of Chapter 2.

Microsoft (probably) paid Toby a ton of money to release the game on Xbox for some reason lol

Again: really funny trailer. Here's most of the Exclusive Xbox Stuff (the rest can be found here, thanks @undertale-encyclopedia for having such a good pinned post) which doesn't sucks and gives more information on a few characters, even some we only meet in Deltarune!

Now for the 6th anniversary we have something very special.

The UNDERTALE 6th Anniversary SO WE PLAY deltarune CHAPTER 1 FOR SOME REASON live stream featuring 3 dads

This is really cool and important to the experience if you ask me! I genuinely recommend watching it, beginning to end, skipping nothing and keeping your eyes peeled throughout. It's not a very "normal" playthrough, and the waiting periods have exclusive songs & information.

You'll see why at the end of it, but now that you've definitely watched that entire video (it's okay if you did it at 2x speed) it's time for...

The Deltarune Essentials: Chapter 2

More spooky tweets...So Spooky... (again, bottom to top. Just like manga!)

Playing Deltarune Chapter 2! Your first playthrough, do whatever you want. There aren't any long stretches without save points this time either. I highly recommend getting at least 1 of everything you come across and keeping it safe, with your new storage ability this shouldn't be too hard. There's plenty of secrets to find too, so keep an eye out!

This will save you a lot of time though: There is a part in Chapter 2 where the party changes in some meaningful way I'm being intentionally vague about. As SOON as this happens, use the new Chapter 2 save menu to copy your save into an unused save slot (I recommend the bottom slot) and don't touch it or save over it for the rest of this playthrough.

There is a hidden B-side route, requiring either a guide to go through it or someone behind your shoulder telling you what to do. Saving at this moment will allow you to do this B-side route, without having to start the chapter over from the beginning. Having someone telling you what to do is the recommended way to do it.

Do the hidden B-side route, which is significantly shorter than a normal playthrough. If you saved in the correct spot, you should have a save file ready to go right before the branching point. Again, someone else telling you what to do is recommended. But if you need a guide for it, there's one on the wiki in the "Method" section near the top. Try not to read anything outside of it.

I recommend to stop reading the guide as soon as possible, as once the route is initiated a low-pitched sound will play whenever you successfully keep the route going. If a different sound plays, you have aborted this B-side route, meaning you need to reload your last save. If you get stuck, you can go back to the guide as necessary. Do note that you WILL need to find The Dumpster and buy from it.

After you Do-The-Thing with the Dumpster-Thing-You-Need-To-Remember-To-Equip, you'll be locked in, so you won't need to consult the guide anymore for the rest of the playthrough.

You can now watch the entire "Making PERFECT Deltarune Save files..." video beginning to end.* I originally linked it at the 6:40 mark, so you can watch what was before that to see what spoilers I skipped. If you just want the Chapter 2 guide portion, it starts at 13:30. This step of "making perfect save files" is technically skippable, but there are some REALLY good items in Chapter 2 that are VERY missable! This will make sure you get them all, maximizing your Chapters 3 & 4 experience. But this one really isn't vital if you're enough of a gamer to not need strong items for "optional" hidden bosses. Oh, and make sure you talk to sinks before people whenever possible. *if you’d rather just read a checklist, here’s one by @brixbraxium. It covers both chapters 1 & 2, so I couldn’t link it earlier. It doesn’t cover absolutely everything like the video guide, but if you just want the big points this is perfect.

The Extracurriculars!: Finale

The Finale. All the extra bits and pieces that have been dropped for us here and there as we've been waiting for the past 3 and a half years for that Trailer. You may not want to read this section until after you're done with Chapter 2! It's easily the longest section to get through. But I'm sure you've been wondering...

Who the hell is that guy from the intro that's been making those spooky tweets before chapter releases? and Part 2 of it. These videos are, of course, not gospel (something like this really can't have one) But it's a very good summary of the information we have and what the common consensus was/is for some things.

Also there's been this unused code that has a person talking the entire time lol. This actually changed between the chapter 1 and chapter 2 release. This is probably Dess? Who you may or may not even know exists at all. Hope you've been paying attention!

The UNDERTALE 7th Anniversary Deltarune Status Update

This one has content you, someone who just played Chapter 2, will actually care about! It previews content and music for chapters 3 & 4, but still effectively tells us nothing! It's awesome! More importantly though it tells you about

THE SPAMTON SWEEPSTAKES

Don't watch the video at the top. This is for your own safety. You can't handle it. Not Yet. This features tons of exclusive music, previews of stuff you already saw and other stuff that wasn't featured in the Switch 2 direct trailer, and ads that you actually SHOULD click on. Can you find all 40 hidden pages? No? Are you sure you checked the product descriptions really thoroughly? Both homepages? Okay here's the wiki page that lists them all. Really do go through them all though, there's a lot of character building that just won't happen in the game here! Also, here's a live Spamton FAQ that got buried in Fangamer's twitter for some reason. Very funny and informative.

Successfully managing to get through all 40 hidden pages, and reading all of the text on the normal pages, and the FAQ, should inoculate you to [Spamton's Essense] allowing you to now watch the video at the top of the sweepstakes page. I am not liable for any [injures] you suffer.

THE NEWSLETTERS

After this, everything became consolidated into Seasonal Newsletters (sign up here, I recommend truck freak) that are archived here on Toby Fox's website. Just click into the Newsletter archive, and scroll down to the bottom first and work your way up. Seriously, just go up through them and enjoy what we've been waiting for months apart.

These talk about everything Toby Fox has been working on and have cool stuff like interviews with the characters and also real people who work on the games! It'll cover a couple things that happened before this section too, so don't worry about me missing anything if you think I haven't mentioned it here. However, there are some Famitsu articles linked, and you may notice that when you try to read them...that you do not speak Japanese...

Here's translations by @chartcarr of pretty much every Toby Fox Japanese only interview! You can find the one's mentioned in the newsletters under the "Toby Fox's Secret Base" link if they're not on the front page. (Chartcarr is going to re-do most of these at some point. That might have already happened, check’em out again if you’ve already read them!)

Newsletter Issue #5 Has 3 Random Valentine's Day Cards. Here's All Of Them In One Page. We had to hunt these down as a community, together! It was brutal! A lot of them only went to a few people, and if those people weren't online or aware we didn't have theirs yet, we just didn't have it! It was great.

All that's left for you now is to remember to click the snowman at the bottom of Issue 8.

Don't want to miss anything once Chapters 3&4 come out? Here's a speculative checklist by @brixbraxium (again!) that predicts everything we'll need to do based on the previous chapters. If I never update this, it can't ever be spoilers! Woohoo!

Big Questions FAQ:

This Series Has Irrevocably Rewired My Brain How Do I Cope With This

Watch this. It's a great video, even if you don't have this problem. It's basically what happened to me.

How Do I Become A Theory Lord With All Of This In My Brain Now?

Here's Device Theory, by @m0llystars, it should get your gears turning just watching it. Yes all 3 parts are out. It's especially worth your time if you like thinking about this game perhaps a bit too much really.

I Really Need Specifically More Undertale Not Deltarune Right NOW!!!...Please?

Here's an Undertale exhibition by Shayy on the show "That's Never Happened Before." You can probably just google "Undertale Theory" or something though if this isn't enough.

I Need To Give This Man More Than The $1-$35 I Have Already Given Him For His Game(s), How?

Official Merch can be found here, there are also EU and JPN sites linked at the bottom of the page. Here is the Bandcamp page to Buy the digital versions of the soundtracks (also on most streaming platforms)

I Like Music Theories

Here you go!

All Of This Happened So Fast I Need Something To Help Analyze The Characters In This Largely Character Driven Series! Help?!

Here's Dorked's Undertale & Deltarune Analysis playlist who you can also find on this website running the blog @megaderping

I've Managed To Consume All Of This Before Deltarune Chapters 3 + 4 Released, Or Came Back After They Released, And I Crave More. Now What?

The biggest inspirations for Undertale and Deltarune are Earthbound, Mother 3, Live A Live, OFF, Yume Nikki, MOON: Remix RPG, Brandish, Cave Story, and the TouHou series. (and a few more not mentioned here!)

OFF The RPG is getting a re-release on Switch & Steam soon with new music (some is by Toby Fox!) and revamped combat, so look forward to that. Or you can play the original OFF for free.

Earthbound is on every Nintendo console ever. Here's an excellent Let's Play of Earthbound you can watch if you don't want to play it yourself. It will show you more than you could possibly find on your own. A great series just in general, if you need something to watch.

Here's a video on how to play Mother 3.

Live A Live can be purchased on Steam or Nintendo Switch, and is excellent. Each campaign is relatively bite sized so you'll never be stuck on anything for long. I recommend disabling tutorials and starting with Imperial China, it's very linear and simple so it's perfect to learn with. Looking up guides to make sure you don't miss anything is fine though!

Cave Story is just free.

Yume Nikke is just free.

MOON: Remix RPG is on steam and Nintendo Switch. If you're a theory head, I highly recommend playing this one through to the end.

TouHou has a very dedicated unofficial translation scene, as there is no official translation for most of the games, so you'll need to go through them to play the games unless you can read Japanese.

I don't really have anything for the Brandish series, I just absorbed information about it from a blog that's no longer active. If anyone knows a truly exceptional let's play of it or the best way to play it, I'll edit it in here!

Stuff from other people who worked with Toby Fox

Temmie Chang has made a couple short games that Toby Fox has helped with

Splendidland (Mickey’s Dicksmasher Person) has done several things, including making Franken RPG. Which is fantastic.

Space Funeral isn’t really related at all but if you liked Franken it’s an obligatory recommendation. A friend of mine played it because they just got into Deltarune and didn't want to burn out replaying it before release, then immediately recommended it to me.

Toby Fox helped with the music for Soul Of Sovereignty, by ggdg, who did some art for Undertale and got interviewed in one of the newsletters.

Fred Wood has his own website, definitely check out LOVE 3.

Taxiderby, creator of UNDERTALE RED, has their own itch page also.

I can also strongly recommend ZeroRanger & Void Stranger if you just want that feeling of digging deeper. Finding obscure interactions and details buried deep within the game, challenging but deeply rewarding in gameplay and lore discovery...Also play them both if you want to hear the music do that thing where the motif is established in the first game to give hints towards stuff in the second game in action. It's very cool.

Wait that's really how you're ending it? A random game rec where all you say is they're very cool without explaining anything about them? One of these wasn't even a question!

#Deltarune #Undertale #UtDr #Nintendo Switch 2 #<- it's a launch day title I think I can get away with that.#switch 2

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crescent-blades · 8 months ago

Text

Father!Kokushibo | Part II

Pairings⌇Kokushibō and his child [c/n], & Kokushibō × wife!Reader. Warnings⌇Refusing to eat or drink/starvation, overexertion

A/N⌇If any of you have seen the earlier version of this, you might notice that this is a bit of a repost. The reason I'm sharing it again is that tumblr apparently hates me and won't let me save that post after adding a few things. So, I figured it would just be easier to just put this out there again, lol.

𖤐ˎˊ˗Masterlist ⌇Part: 1

▪︎Kokushibō would begin training his child; being the strongest and most experienced samurai in history, you could bet that the teachings would be of the highest quality.

▪︎Along with weilding the katana, Kokushibō would also be adamant that his child received a proper education. For that, he would entrust you to teach the child to read and write properly, how to write poems [he could step in if you aren't good at it], and whatnot.

▪︎If you had a daughter, Kokushibō would rely on you to guide her in proper conduct. On the other hand, if you had a son, he would take it upon himself to teach him. [Considering his traditional beleifs]

▪︎There would be many things Kokushibō would teach your child—introducing anything and everything he could. One of which included—

"Here.. I wanted to share this with you.."

▪︎'Go'. Aside from all the trainings and whatnot, Kokushibō would enjoy spending time playing strategic board games with his young one. He didn't just play; he carefully watched every move his child made, trying to understand their thought process. This way, he could anticipate their strategies, pushing them further to think even more critically.

▪︎Kokushibō would provide feedback on every move his child made. If there was a mistake, he would express his disappointment, at times suggesting alternative strategies and what else could have been done. On the other hand, if the move was clever, he would offer praise.

▪︎Despite this, Kokushibō always found a way to twist the game in his favour, making it nearly impossible to win against him each time.

▪︎Kokushibō would not only be a father but also a teacher, quick to teach your young one.

▪︎Unlike his own father, Kokushibō would be much more understanding. He would be strict in terms of his child's behaviour, how they conducted themselves, and even in the way of the sword. However, he would also allow them the freedom to explore their interests and to do whatever they wished, recognising the limitations he faced during his own upbringing.

▪︎As for the breathing styles, Kokushibō would ideally want his child to learn sun breathing, but since he couldn't master it himself, he would opt to teach them moon breathing instead. If the child wasn't strong enough, he would be disappointed but wouldn't mind too much. In fact, he would encourage them to perfect their breathing techniques no matter what style they used.

▪︎Kokushibō's approach to training was quite rigorous. He pushed his child to their limits with each exercise, ensuring that consistency and discipline were maintained. While he provided the training, the actual learning and understanding were left to his child. He didn't believe in spoon-feeding knowledge. After all, it was important for them to grow to be independent and make their own decisions.

▪︎Many a times, Kokushibō would take your child to fight demons and train with them [perhaps even fight a hashira if they encountered one]. He would stand back in the distance and observe them silently. He would not intervene in any way; whatever decisions the child made were theirs and not his; each mistake was a lesson, something he would remind them of after the fight, incorporating those lessons into their training for improvement.

▪︎Kokushibō would nurture and raise his child in such a way that they would be disciplined and incredibly determined, striving for excellence much like their own father.

▪︎Speaking of determined, there was a time, however, when your child would not eat or drink, training and pushing themselves to the maximum, which caused you a great deal of concern. Kokushibō, however, appeared rather unfazed by this, expressing that it was commendable how seriously his child was taking the art of swordsmanship and that he even felt moved.

▪︎But then those few hours stretched into many, and nearly a whole day had passed without your child taking even a sip of water. This was the moment when Kokushibō would finally step in—

"Enough.."The demon stood beside his child, his six eyes fixed intently on them. The child was bleeding from their hands, their muscles worn out and pushed to the limit. "No.. I must not give up..!" Just as the child prepared to swing the wooden sword again, before they could even react, the sword would suddenly be snatched and tossed aside, landing far from reach. "There.. is no benefit in continuing. Your body.. has already reached it's maximum exertion. Whatever you are practicing now is pointless.. rest now and continue tomorrow." "But I need to perfect my—" "You are doing yourself more harm than good.. the state you are in.. you will not be able to practice tomorrow.. an entire day.. would be wasted. It would disrupt your progress. Is that.. what you want?"

▪︎In conclusion, Kokushibō would definitely be a strict father . This means you might find yourself being the more nurturing parent.

▪︎But that is not to say he cannot be compassionate; deep down, he holds great love for his child. His strictness stems from the fact that he wants to see his child excel and be the utmost best; even surpass him one day.

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churipu · 1 year ago

Note

hii ive been obsessed with your work lately and I hope ur doing well! make sure not to overwork yourself!! Anyways can u make a nanami headcanon where s/o comes home late because she’s working overtime but forgets to tell him?

COMING HOME LATE TO NANAMI ₊˚⊹

featuring. nanami kento x reader

warnings. none

note. haiii nonniee, thank you so much for appreciating my works. it means so much to me <33 i'm sorry this one took so long and i hope you like it, mwah mwah

i feel like in the relationship, nanami tries to talk you to quit your job before — but you felt like it was kind of unfair if he had to use his money to support you, so you always managed to decline that. even if the male was a bit disappointed at your decision, he didn't want to force you, so he lets you be.

you didn't have a cursed energy; a non-sorcerer. unlike him, you had a simple job of making coffees, alias a barista. the income was not too much, but still enough for the both of you (although nanami always ends up paying for your stuff because he insists).

the job wasn't too tiring, however today was a bit different — the store had gotten a rush hour in the afternoon, not that you were complaining about it as you signed up for the job anyways. and a co-worker had asked you to cover their shift because they had an family emergency.

really, you didn't mind covering for them at all. you were getting an extra for that and it counts — just it meant that you were going to be the closing shift for today, and everyone knows closing up meant it would be a lot of work; especially with the washing, cleaning up, mopping the floors, the coffee machines, everything.

you ended up closing the shop late at night, rushing to your shared apartment with nanami. opening the door in exhaustion, calling out a tired, "i'm home."

"y/n?" nanami appears from the corner, rushing towards you and then cupping your face.

in confusion you blinked at him, wondering what the hell was happening and why was he acting like this?

"you never texted or answered my calls, i was worried," he mumbles out, and it finally dawned upon you that during your shift — it was too busy that you hadn't managed to get to your phone at all. and it was on silent too.

"i'm sorry, baby. i had to cover up for my co-worker's shift, it was my mistake for not telling you," you smiled at him, planting a kiss on his lips.

nanami shook his head, "it's alright, please inform me next time," he kissed your forehead before pulling you into a tight hug, "how was work?"

"you won't believe how busy it is today, surprising. but it was fun, and i'm getting extra paycheck for covering my co-worker's shift!" you marveled out happily, and he gazes down at you fondly, kissing the crown of your head.

"i'm glad then," he mumbles out to you, "if i tell you to stop—"

"still a no from me," you kicked your shoes off and walked towards the living room, sparing him a cheeky smile, "i like working, plus, it's not fair that you have to waste your money for my livings too."

nanami heaves out a sigh, "my money is your money."

but he didn't push on, what mattered is that you enjoy working. nanami will undoubtedly still pay for your things, telling you that you should just save your paychecks incase he goes broke (which will never happen).

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk #jujutsu kaisen fluff #fluff #jjk fluff #nanami kento #nanami #kento nanami #nanami kento x reader #nanami fluff #nanami kento fluff #i love nanami #bye i miss nanami

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twilightsumu · 2 months ago

Text

how to create a love story | k. akaashi

introductions: best friends kiss ALL the time

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ yn ln

♡ publisher - but hates her job. she wants to become a writer, specifically a mangaka

♡ does not know how to draw to save her life so never went through with it

♡ chronically online

♡ outgoing, loud, & kind

♡ her favorite party trick: reciting passages from classical literature

♡ you’ll find her randomly acting out trisha cappelletti’s monologue along with atsumu

♡ met atsumu & oikawa in college & quickly became best friends - iwaizumi & sakusa following behind

♡ shares an apartment with miya & sakusa.

♡ goes to iwaizumi for deep talks on life & relationships

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ t. oikawa

♡ lives three floors (with iwaizumi) below yn, miya, & sakusa

♡ casually brings up the kiss from the christmas party two years ago despite promising iwaizumi it won’t be talked about again

♡ chronically online - like so deep into reddit it’s scary what he randomly brings up

♡ volleyball coach at the local high school

♡ because of this he comes back talking like a fifteen year old

“do i have rizz yn?” “scale to skibidi to sigma, rate my rizz!” “gyatt!”

♡ plays dress to impress & has been trying to get everyone else to play.

♡ actually super close to atsumu

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ h. iwaizumi

♡ voice of reason in the gc

♡ stressed

♡ athletic trainer

♡ tries to drag everyone to the gym at least once a week

♡ one of drake’s top yearly listeners

♡ gets flustered whenever that christmas kiss is mentioned

♡ watches oikawa play dti and gets confused with the poses (specially pose 28)

“why the fuck do you keep posing like that!?”

♡ does not know why he is friends with them

♡ however, he is super protective of them

♡ oikawa hacked into his phone and gave him that header because he thinks iwaizumi is “so alpha male coded”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ a. miya

♡ gets tricked by ai on facebook

“guys look, it’s a dog singing gangnam style!”

♡ unemployed (it’s just off season)

♡ big sexyredd fan!

♡ gives the worst advice

♡ has folders of memes

♡ gives the worst advice but he says it with so much confidence you follow along (idiots)

♡ buys the most random apartment shit

“roomies, you like this fish lamp? it supposedly smells like fish after being turned on for awhile!”

♡ is hurt when the thing he brought in is “missing” (kiyoomi threw it out)

♡ so damn clingy, is always touching yn and kiyoomi

♡ hates reading but is intrigued when yn talks about the new fanfic she’s reading

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ k. sakusa

♡ uses the group chat to judge.. everyone

♡ volleyball player, home for off season but has a part time job coaching volleyball

♡ lives for drama (especially when iwaizumi & oikawa gets into arguments)

“will you two shut up!? i hear the boyfriends arguing about the christmas party kiss.. again!”

♡ he saw the christmas kiss

♡ gives brutally honest advice

♡ the apartment’s maid

♡ hates physical affection

♡ actually loves that yn’s job allows her to bring home so many books; he sometimes reads them before she could get to them

♡ huge homebody, 99.5% of the time he doesn’t go out with the gc

taglist [open]: @nscuit, @porty, @accidentpronedork, @x3nafix, @vivian-555, @sexylexy12, @luvinazaki, @idontevenknow129, @folksmione, @thatmf-jay

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bucktommypositivityweek · 29 days ago

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🧡 welcome, friends, to a new bucktommy positivity bingo! 🧡

WHAT IS IT?

As in the last bucktommy positivity bingo, we are going to be inviting everyone in the fandom to claim a bingo sheet, and check off squares of fanwork tropes by reading & commenting on other people's fics, writing or drawing their own works, making rec lists, making headcanon posts, or more! at the end of the event, a few special graphics will be shared as honorary badges for everyone who's scored a bingo!

EVENT DATES

Bingo cards posted - Monday 2nd June

Main Event - Monday 9th June to Sunday 15th June

Additional time - the week after the event is allowed as leeway time if you don't manage to complete in the first week!

WAYS TO CHECK OFF A SQUARE

You have a few different options on activities that count for checking off a square in our bingo!

Find a fanwork that features that trope, and leave a detailed reply/tag/comment for the creator about what you like about it! if it's on tumblr, make sure you reblog it!

Find multiple fanworks featuring that trope, and make a rec-list for other people with them! Make sure to leave what you like about each work as part of your rec, and tag the creators!

Create a new fanwork for the square! this could be a drabble, fic, meta post/headcanon, doodle; no limits on size, but we don't want anyone to think they need to spend a lot of time creating a fanwork for this unless they want to. it's all for fun!

You don't have to stick to one method when it comes to getting your bingo! you're welcome to review three fics, reblog one art piece with a comment, write one drabble, comment on five gifsets - whatever ratio you'd like to do it in! all you have to do to complete a row is engage with each of the tropes in it in some way, shape or form!

HOW IT WORKS

The number one rule is have fun and spread as much positivity as you can! anything goes in this event as long as it is supporting a positive, good-faith bucktommy work.

We will post the set of bingo sheets - some with season 8 themed prompts, some with generic ones. To claim a card, all you need to do is save the one you want and post it on your own blog or wherever you want to track your bingos!

There will be multiple options for the bingo sheets and you can choose which one you want to do, so if there are squares that squick you out, you can avoid them.

As mentioned above, you can engage with the prompts however you want, and it's fine to mix and match what you do (reviewing, writing, headcanon posts, etc)!

Occasionally during the week, we will share a post that people can reply to, or reblog & tag, to track your bingos. However, you can also repost your bingo card on your own blog and check them off as you go (remember to tag us!) or however you prefer to track!

If a fanwork or comment you make fits more than one of the prompts on your card, you're welcome to use it to cross off multiple prompts at once! if you'd like an additional challenge you can stick to doing each square individually, but there is no rule against checking off multiple

At the end of the event, we’ll share some pretty graphics as a reward for all your hard work ☀️

We have loved doing Bucktommy Positivity Bingo before and we hope people enjoy it again! it's a great way to participate in an event even if you don't have much time or inclination to create original works - reading, commenting and supporting other people are a huge focus of this event, and we can't wait to see what everyone chooses to do this time around!

Please let us know if you have any questions, reblog this to signal boost, and stay tuned for the bingo cards! ☀️🧡☀️

#bucktommy positivity week #bucktommy #evan buckley #tommy kinard #911 abc #911 fandom events #bucktommypositivityweek #bucktommy fic #tevan #kinley #FAQ

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roguishcat · 3 months ago

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The Best Laid Plans

Summary: Even the best laid plans may go wrong. Admittedly, Astarion's plan hadn't been that great to begin with. Part 2 of 'Part of His Plan'.

Pairing: Astarion x unnamed female Tav

Word count: 4k

Tags: Romance, Astarion is bad at feelings, Unnamed female Tav, Angst, Tooth-rotting fluff, Romance and feels

A/N: This story has a wonderful beta!! Thank you so much @preciouslittlebhaalbae! 💖💖💖 You are an absolute gem and the loveliest person ever for doing this! 🫂Thank you for your patience and kind suggestions! (because I'm a silly person who can't spot even obvious mistakes and @preciouslittlebhaalbae has the patience of a saint). You might remember me posting snippets from this back in January, so this is my second finished WIP for @thekindredcollective BG3 Spring Cleaning!

Hope you enjoy the story and please let me know what you think! 💖💖 Comments, likes and reposts are always loved! 💖💖

Tav had a shadow and its name was Astarion.

She didn’t notice immediately. She was far too concerned with saving Thaniel, breaking the curse, helping every single one of their companions on their personal quests, and combating the mindless creatures wanting to murder them from the moment they stepped out of the dome protecting the Last Light Inn.

At first, Tav thought that she was just imagining it. Because every time she looked up, she seemed to glimpse silver curls, feel feather-light touches of cool fingers on her neck, all but taste rosemary, bergamot and brandy on her tongue. This lasted only a moment, yet a moment was all he ever needed to leave a lasting impression on her.

At some point, Astarion seemed to decide to stop bothering to pretend that he wasn’t following Tav around, his ruby eyes all but boring holes into her back as he watched her closely.

Now, this wasn’t the first time that Astarion acted somewhat uncanny. Perhaps two hundred years of being forced to do someone’s bidding did that to an elf. Either way, Tav didn’t want to offend Astarion. So she chose not to comment on how odd his behaviour was.

However, the longer they travelled, the more Astarion seemed to insert himself into every situation, making sure that he was at her side at all times. She would round a corner and bump into his leather-clad back. Walk down the stairs and he was already waiting for her, tapping his foot in an impatient manner as he scowled at whoever was walking behind her at the time.

Finally, when she almost tripped over him, Tav decided to ask Astarion about it.

"Astarion, is there something you want?"

"Me? Why would you ask such a thing, my sweet?" Astarion said with a crooked smile, and Tav noticed how tensely he held himself. A coil waiting to spring upward at a smallest tap.

"Well.. Lately, I've noticed that you’ve started to… hover."

Apparently, this was the wrong thing to say. His expression shuttered and he took a step back.

“And I take it that you’d rather I didn’t, is that it?”

“No, that’s not what I meant, I -”

"If you do not wish for my company, you can just come out and say so! Send me back to camp to wallow in misery as Gale attempts to engage me in decidedly unengaging conversation," Astarion all but hissed at her.

Astarion regretted snapping at her almost immediately. He knew that it was uncalled for. Tav was nothing but kind and accommodating. But he couldn’t help the bitterness he felt when seeing her treat everyone else with the same thoughtfulness, the same caring. Was her protecting him nothing but an obligation? Was Tav offering her neck to him time and time again something that she would have done for any soul that needed sustenance? To him, it seemed that lately she led without making sure that he followed. Was whatever they shared coming to its logical conclusion sooner than he anticipated?

"I didn't say that I don't want you around," Tav frowned and took a careful step towards him, trying to mitigate the conflict before they started arguing in earnest. "I just want to make sure that everything is alright."

"As is your duty, my fair leader. To check up on any and all lost causes that seek your company, hm?"

Tav wasn’t sure exactly what he meant. His words felt cruel, though, and she felt herself flush.

"Sometimes I don't understand what you want from me, Astarion.”

He winced at how hurt she sounded. Another, better adjusted person, would be quick to apologise. Blame it all on being tired and frazzled, suggest with a rueful smile that the shadows were getting to him. Yet, Astarion only watched as Tav walked past the rest of the party. Shadowheart and Karlach, who had been standing nearby, choose not to comment on the exchange.

He'd rather have one of them punch him than have them silently disapprove. At least then he’d pretend he was angry at his companions rather than himself. Anger was familiar territory. Fear was nothing new. Whatever he felt now was a different, unfamiliar brand of torture.

An hour later Astarion found himself nervously pacing up and down his tent. Or at least doing something as close to pacing as he could in such cramped quarters. His thoughts a flurry of worries and poorly supressed insecurities, Astarion had no idea how to fix this mess. He wasn’t even sure why he was so worried about it in the first place.

By now he knew Tav well enough to be certain that she would not banish him. She would not do that to any of them without just cause. And no matter how unreasonable and hurtful he had been, she would not leave him to die.

So why did he want to fix this so badly? Surely not because he was worried that whatever this was, whatever tentative trust he’d managed to establish between them, would be over come morning once she had some time to think? Because even someone as forgiving as Tav had her limits. She was kind and warm, accepting and generous; but she was no fool.

Astarion stopped abruptly and put his arms around himself.

He had to fix this. Somehow.

Turning to his trunk, he lifted the lid and rummaged around, digging up the bottle that he was saving for a special occasion. Grovelling for his lover to forgive him seemed like special occasion enough.

Then Astarion spent an age making sure that he looked his best. After all, presentation was half the victory!

Thus primped and primed - and carrying a peace offering - Astarion stalked through the night, making sure to avoid his campmates. He really did not feel like getting some unsolicited advice from anyone for the time being.

Standing in front of the tent, he suddenly felt nervous. A strange, sick feeling in his stomach, he found he was unsure if he wanted to know what Tav would say to him.

Taking a breath he didn’t need, Astarion plastered his best smile on his face and moved the tent flap aside.

"Dearest, how about we both choose to be adults about this and make up, hm?"

"Sure," Tav said without looking up from whatever she was doing, effectively dismissing him. Clearly, it was 'thanks for the half-baked apology', but 'no thanks' to spending an evening together. Choosing to soldier on against all odds, Astarion pretended that he could not read her body language and sat down beside her on the bedroll.

"Now... Can I tempt you with some wine? Or perhaps with some other… delights?" Astarion drawled seductively, fingers dancing down the wine bottle’s curved side.

He was a vision and he knew it. Hair coiffed just so, shirt slightly loose and showing off more alabaster skin than usual. It was a very tempting sight, if only Tav were in the mood to be tempted.

She didn’t even look up.

"I'm a little busy right now."

Astarion fought back a scowl. He was finding that maintaining a charming façade was quite a challenge when Tav was so decidedly against playing along. Yet, he was not about to give up. Oh, he would not be ignored so easily! He didn’t spend an age getting ready, thinking of what he was going to say, and bringing the bottle of wine that Shadowheart squirreled away, just to be turned down. He would not spend the night alone in his own tent!

Astarion chuckled breathily. "Aren't you always? Which is why you should really let your hair down once in a while,” he dropped his voice an octave, inching towards her. “Live a little, whilst there is still living to be done."

There was a pause, and he would hold his breath if he still needed to draw it.

"Fine," Tav sighed, her shoulders sagging. "Wine, please."

"And whilst you are enjoying a goblet or two, I will fix that tear in your shirt I noticed earlier."

"You don't have to."

"But I want to. Allow yourself to be the one taken care of, for once. Or are you truly that upset with me that you would rather have to walk about with that tear?"

"I'm not upset with you. I'm angry with myself."

Now that was a development that he could not have foreseen. Angry with herself? Whatever had she done?

"Care to share why?"

"Not really."

It seemed that Tav definitely was not in the mood to make this easy for him. Luckily, he knew just how to engage her in conversation.

"And here I thought that we would play that question game you are so fond of! Go on, dearest. Question for question, as is our way."

Ah, finally a little smile for his efforts.

"I suppose.”

Tav took a sip from her goblet, eyes widening when she realised that the wine was actually pleasant. Honestly, did she really think that he wouldn’t bring something half-palatable?

"That's the enthusiastic answer I was hoping for! Now come on, off with your shirt."

Tav put her wine down and pulled the fabric of her shirt up, his eyes following the ascent as soft skin was revealed inch by tantalising inch. He ignored the unbidden, surprising urge to put his lips onto her neck, not to feed but to taste.

Tav handed him the shirt and as their fingers brushed, Astarion was glad that she wasn’t in any hurry to get away from him, allowing him to hold her hand in his.

“So um… same as last time? A question for a question?”

She moved her hand, leaving his digits to cool once her warmth was gone.

“Yes,” he cleared his throat, “that seems reasonable.”

Tav stood up to get the sewing kit and a spare shirt. This gave him ample opportunity to admire her now that her back was turned. One wouldn’t want to be accused of staring! She slid the shirt on quickly, scars disappearing under the simple cloth, making him once again wonder what the story behind those was.

Tav was usually so forthcoming, answering questions without much hesitation or worry. He could understand why someone would be hesitant to talk about scars, but by the gods was he curious to find out the story behind hers!

Seeing that he probably was still in the proverbial doghouse, Astarion decided to start small.

“What is your favourite thing to eat?”

Tav looked at him over her shoulder as she adjusted her clothes.

“I’m surprised you want to know something so boring.”

“My sweet, when it comes to you, nothing could be boring,” he purred, putting his goblet to his lips and looking at her over the rim in a way that had made hundreds swoon.

Tav smiled and sat down on her bedroll, but otherwise did not seem to be affected by his act of seduction. How annoying.

“Well, whilst Gale’s efforts to make something edible out of whatever we manage to come across is close to miraculous, I do miss Baldurian Mash.”

Seeing the look on his face, Tav giggled, “Too common for your tastes?”

“On the contrary!” Astarion laughed. “I am quite sure that I too enjoyed something like this back when… well. Back when I could enjoy the taste of food.”

Tav’s face softened as he muttered the last part. Astarion shifted uncomfortably and took a gulp of his wine. Damn her and that look! Who even looked at people like that! Only Tav did, in his experience.

“As we are on the subject of food, why did you choose me to snack on? Surely others looked just as appealing?” Tav teased.

The truth was at the time he had already known enough about Tav to put his faith in her, to trust her to at least listen to his explanations. He had been almost certain that the others would strike him down for even attempting to come near their necks. Lae’zel would have probably skinned him alive, given the chance. Even now she occasionally questioned whether he was useful enough to keep around.

Astarion poured her more wine, thinking about the best way to answer her question.

“Perhaps you simply looked delicious enough for a predator such as myself to want to take a bite,” Astarion flirted without looking away, attempting to ascertain her mood.

Tav’s lips quirked into a smile and she took a sip of her wine.

“Or perhaps you had already established your reputation as a do-gooder, unable to turn away anyone imploring you to help them. Pick whichever reason you like, dearest,” Astarion shrugged.

Tav gave him a look that made Astarion both nervous and excited. Not exactly a combination a seasoned professional such as he could afford to feel. Maintaining his cool was crucial, he reminded himself. He could not afford to lose focus. Eyes on the prize and all that. The prize being Cazador's head on a silver platter, of course. Not the love of the woman in front of him. Or something equally ridiculous.

“What are you thinking of doing once our adventure is over? Assuming we don’t all die in some horrible manner.”

“I'm not sure," Tav started, "I might stay in Baldur’s Gate for a while. Assuming my house is still intact.”

“You’re from Baldur’s Gate?”

“Yes. Is it so hard to believe?”

“Hah! And I here I was, thinking that you were a country girl through and through. Meeting each sunrise and sundown in some picturesque little village where all the neighbours call each other by their names.”

Tav huffed and moved to punch his biceps without putting much force behind it.

“Oh, don’t get angry.” Astarion caught her fist and put his lips to her knuckles, fangs moving across skin without breaking it. “It’s a compliment, if anything.”

“I will choose to take it as one.” Tav gave a little laugh and pulled back, making Astarion release her hand.

Perhaps he worded it in a way that did not necessarily sound like praise, but he just could not believe that someone as kind and warm as Tav could be a Baldurian. In spite of being thoroughly and repeatedly defiled by him, she still carried that air of sweetness about her. And whilst this irritated him initially, it was… nice. Pleasant to be around someone who did something for others without any ulterior motive. Just out of the goodness of her heart. It was quite frankly a miracle that she hadn’t been killed yet.

Thinking about her mortality had him taking a furtive glance at her side, where the worst of her scars were.

“About your scars, and you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, how did you get them?”

Tav’s fingers clutched her goblet a little tighter before she caught herself and made a show of wanting to put it down by the bedroll without tipping it over on the uneven surface.

“No, it’s fine. It’s not much of a story. Just a silly girl falling in love with the wrong person only to find out he was using me for his own gain. So, you are right, in a way. Perhaps I wasn’t quite made to live in the city.”

It wasn’t much, but the way her shoulders hunched, her pained expression, her looking at anything but him felt… wrong. To Astarion, Tav was annoyingly righteous, stupidly brave, incredibly stubborn, frustratingly selfless. She was all that and so much more. She deserved better from the world and seeing her look so small made him want to hurt something.

“About earlier…” Tav began tentatively.

“My words were uncalled for. I apologise. I didn’t-”

He wanted to say that he didn’t mean any of it. He wanted to tell her that he just found himself hating that she gave her precious attention to anyone else when he wanted it for himself. He wanted to tell her many things. Naturally, he didn’t say any of them.

“I know. Which is why I was angry at myself. We are all under so much pressure, it’s a wonder that we aren’t constantly at each other’s throats.”

“I was disappointed with myself for thinking that you were like him,” Tav picked her goblet up and took a sip. “Because at that moment, I looked at your face and I saw a spectre that haunted my waking days. And it was wrong of me to assume that you were like that. So, I’m sorry too.”

Astarion felt like someone sucker punched him. Hells, he’d rather she did punch him. Pain he could take. He was used to pain over the years. But this- this raw honesty, the way she looked at him when she said that, the faith she was placing in him-

Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Astarion? Are you okay?”

He was not. Because this was wrong. His nice, simple plan had backfired so spectacularly and in a way he could never have imagined.

Shit.

She was waiting for an answer.

“Yes, of course, dearest! Why wouldn’t I be? We made up! I am well, you are well. All is well,” Astarion put both of their goblets of wine away and then moved towards Tav with an intense look in his ruby eyes.

“Just perfect.” Astarion whispered the last part and pressed his lips to hers to stop Tav from asking any more questions.

Astarion lowered Tav onto the bedroll, one hand behind her head, the other on her hip. Slowly, taking his time to savour the softness of her skin, he trailed his fingers up. The fabric of her shirt bunched as his hand traced the contours of her body and settled just below her breast.

“Are you sure?” He felt warm breath against his lips as they broke apart.

Instead of replying, Astarion put his mouth on Tav’s neck, fangs grazing sensitive flesh, her heartbeat strong in his ears. Her blood called to him, but he didn’t dare bite.

He would tell her everything. And he would tell her soon. Because the thought of him being in any way like that vile man who dared to use her and scar her, to put that dejected look on her face, was something that Astarion could not bear.

His movements grew more frantic as he removed the last of the barriers between their bodies, wanting, needing to do enough that she would stay.

Because whilst he didn’t want to examine his feelings for Tav too much, not daring to hope for anything, he was terrified of what the consequences of his deception would be.

When Tav opened her eyes the next morning, Astarion was still in her tent, his deft fingers moving with precision and making quick work of the tear in her shirt.

“Good morning,” she murmured, pushing her messy hair out of her face. Gods, she must truly look a sight.

“Good morning, my sweet,” Astarion replied without looking up, seemingly too focused on his task to pay her much attention.

Tav didn’t expect Astarion to still be here in the morning. Not that she wanted him gone. On the contrary, his staying the night was nice. The thought that he wanted to stay made her blush.

Except Tav had a small problem now. She had to get dressed and Astarion was still here. She could hobble about with her bedsheet wrapped around her body, but she would probably just end up falling forward like a graceless lump. And that was less than ideal when one was in the company of the most attractive, stunning elf.

Astarion seemed to be busy enough not to pay her any attention. And Tav hoped that she didn’t look as horrible with her hair sticking up oddly and pillow lines on her face. She quickly brushed it back and tried to tame it by running her fingers through it.

And then she saw a ghost of smirk on those mocking lips. Oh, he knew what she was doing. And he was laughing at her! That ass. That gorgeous, beautiful bastard! She would show him!

Thus, filled with a strong resolve – that is to show Astarion that he could not have her flustered and stuttering over just a smirk - Tav turned around and rose, stretching her muscles in a feline manner that had ruby eyes following her every move. Astarion’s pupils dilated and his nostrils flared, one fang worrying his lower lip.

“How are you feeling this morning?” He gave his work a quick glance before cutting the thread.

“Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and ready to infiltrate Moonrise Towers, actually.” Tav quickly (but not too quickly!) dressed and went at her hair with a comb.

“Hm, seeing as how little sleep you got last night, I’d thought you would be postponing that little outing of ours.” Astarion delighted in a little squeak she gave as she dropped her comb.

“Well, I’m fine. But if you are too tired to come with us today, perhaps I can ask someone else to accompany me.”

“Someone else? Perish the thought lest you wish to perish!” Astarion rose in one graceful movement, taking a step and then another towards her. “Who can possibly watch your back better than yours truly?”

“No one can,” Tav conceded easily. She felt cool fingers on her waist as Astarion handed her the mended shirt.

“Thank you.”

“Darling, the only thanks I need is you not leaving me behind today,” he gave a breezy, lilting laugh, wondering if acting nonchalant would be enough to convince himself that her answer did not matter to him.

Please, don’t ever leave me behind.

“I wouldn’t.”

Because I’d rather take a chance on you than wonder what could have been had I been braver.

“Wise. Having Gale try his hand at picking locks could only end in disaster.”

I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you got hurt.

“Oh, can you imagine! No, we need your magic touch and sneaky ways to make sure we are undetected,” she teased him and his eyes were momentarily drawn to the dimples on her cheeks. He wanted to kiss them, then make his way down the column of her neck, and then lower still until she couldn’t tell him to stop.

They were still holding the shirt, fabric bunching as fingers moved closer. Astarion let go of cloth, hesitant fingertips brushing against warm knuckles as Tav looked at him in a way that he had thought he caught her look at others.

And yet…

Perhaps it was simply a trick of the light. Or his mind playing games with him. Just wishful thinking on his part. But Astarion could not help but think that there was something more between them. Something precious and beautiful that bloomed to life among all the carnage and horror that was his life.

“Tav?” He swallowed nervously.

“Yes?”

“I-”

“Breakfast is ready!”

Saved by Gale, out of all people.

And yet…

Astarion felt a wave of disappointment as he watched Tav quickly put on her shirt, the magic of the moment broken, and they were thrust harshly back into their reality.

And yet…

When Tav took his hand and led him out of the tent, her thumb tracing circles on his cool skin, Astarion wondered if this could be real. If they could be real. Tav put her faith in him, chose to trust a predator with her life. He had thought her a fool. Now, as he looked at how radiant she looked even in these listless, lifeless lands, he wondered if he could summon a fraction of her courage and put his faith in her.

💖 Tag list 💖:

@ninty900, @ayselluna, @dajeong, @ravenswritingroom,

@misscrissfemmefatale,

@clazberryk, @anukulee,

@preciouslittlebhaalbae,

@sh3rl0ck, @mellowenthusiast2299,

@fleetstreet78, @starlight-rogue,

@obsessedwhyyes, @arzen9, @hellethil,

@khywren, @maeryls-journal, @larvasmoon, @xxnashiraxx

(divider by @saradika)

#the kindred collective #bg3 spring cleaning #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 astarion #astarion #fanfic #astarion fanfiction #baldur's gate fanfiction #fanfiction #astarion ancunin #bg3 tav #bg3 spoilers #Astarion is bad at feelings #astarion romance #Roguish cat

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writerastray · 2 months ago

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heaven come {Blood Rush}

General Masterlist - Blood Rush Masterlist - Read this before interacting

-> Word count: 3.2k

-> Relationships: Han Jisung/f!Reader

-> Rating: 18+ → Mature/Explicit

->Genre/Tropes: Crime/Mafia AU, Romance, Mutual Pining, Romantic/Sexual Tension, Toxic Love (Spoiler tags: Ex's to Lovers?)

-> Warning tags: Physical Abuse, Weapons, Blood and Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, Car Accident, Toxic Relationship. Other Additional Tags to Be Added.

-> Synopsis: Part 2 of Blood Rush - You swore you’d never see Han Jisung again. Your plan was to focus on your studies and enjoy your normal college life. However, one phone call changes everything, dragging you back into the chaos you tried to escape.

⚠︎ I do not permit any form of copying, translation, or reposting. Please reblog if you want to share my work. This work is only appropriate for adults over the age of 18. Ageless/blank blogs will be blocked.

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

Han Jisung. Always racing into problems' arms like an obsessive lover.

And you, stupid, went behind him to save his ass.

Aside from the arm, there were bruises on his face and a gruesome purple mark on his chest and stomach. He still had his pants, but the red stains suggested more injuries. Thankfully, nothing appeared broken. At least, you hoped not.

"I'm alright, thank you for asking, darling," he replied, his tone dripping with sarcasm.

A sigh escaped as you headed to his closet in search of the first-aid kit.

Returning, you kneeled in front of him, careful not to put weight on his body. Your attention focused on his injured arm.

"Anyone saw you?" You ask, realizing that you'd been holding your breath until you saw it wasn't a bullet wound, only a cut.

"I don't think so. I wasn't exactly paying attention either," he said, his eyes filled with rage, hands clenching. "I fucked up. They will get my DNA, know it was me and—"

"The car exploded. They can't get you," you interrupted.

Jisung's head shook slowly, his lips forming a thin line. His body thudded against the wall, and a soft curse escaped his lips.

You wanted to kill him and kiss him at the same time.

Once the wound had been properly cleansed, you noticed it was deeper than you thought, and the bleeding didn't stop. Thanks to Chris, Jisung had at least the basic things to treat a serious wound.

"I'll have to stitch you up," you said, getting the needle.

"I'm sorry," Jisung whispered.

Your hands paused, and you inhaled deeply, brushing aside the apology. Instead, you focused on the task at hand.

Every wince from Jisung sent an ache through your own heart, and soon you were saying soft, soothing words.

When you were done, you turned your attention to the more superficial injuries.

The accident had been meticulously engineered. They had schemed for months, back when you were dating Jisung. Every minute detail had been plotted—the car's precise placement, the timing of the traffic light, the angles, everything. Jisung was to get out on the streets as soon as he killed the guy and go to the subway. No car should explode, only a minor accident. Enough to be a distraction and ease Jisung's escape.

Something went wrong.

You’ll have to talk with Chris, and that frustrates you even more.

You were supposed to be out of this life.

Cold fingers grazing against your cheek startled you.

You hadn't noticed him drawing close. His chest, that made your fingers tingle at the thought of touching it, his tempting collarbones, his soft pouty lips that begged for a stolen kiss and the beautifully broken eyes.

"You're thinking too much."

"Someone has to," you said.

Gently, you cleaned the wounds on his face. Jisung rested against the wall again, closing his eyes.

"What now?" You ask.

"Chris said there's a place to lay low for the night. It's no longer safe for us."

Us? What was your crime? Loving a man just a little bit more than the healthy amount recommended by society?

"I'm supposed to be home, studying for an exam. Not running from the police," you said, letting the rage out. Why couldn’t he have been just an ordinary college guy whose worst crime was smoking weed? It wasn’t fair. “I won’t go with you.”

His eyes locked on yours, gaze so intense it sent tingles down your core.

“I know,” he said quietly. “But you don’t have a choice.”

You hated the guilt in his eyes.

You hated even more how badly you still desired him.

Want to keep reading? You can check it out on my AO3—just click this link to continue: heaven come 🖤

➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶

Author's note: Hi! I hope you liked this story. English is my second language, so please excuse my errors. Constructive feedback is always appreciated! I do not permit any form of copying, translation, or reposting of my work.

Did you enjoy this? If so, please reblog it. Thank you for reading! Sending love 💕

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flowerandblood · 2 years ago

Text

Equation without solution

[ Michael • Gavey x painter student! • female ]

[ warnings: sex content, angst, smut, trauma, mention of bullying, mention of physical and mental violence ]

[ description: Michael sees no point in worrying about anything, especially relationships, when all he needs is math. His calm, logical world falls apart when a female painting student asks him for help in calculating the best possible composition to create a portrait. Sexual tension, angst, a litte brat taming and domination kink, great childhood traumas. ]

The fragment with Michael in the trailer inspired me to write this. The whole discussion around this oneshot, whether it should be made at all, made me very tired. I don't think we'll get his backstory in the movie, but even if we did, I just felt like writing it - so here it is. Have fun reading.

Part 2 − Formula for perfection

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

My other works: Masterlist

_____

Ever since he could remember, his father had explained to him that an intelligent man is not guided by emotions, but by logic – that's why he married his mother, that's why he went into the army. A long belt hung in plain sight in one of the cupboards of their house, so that he could use it to remind him this when necessary.

His father never hit him with his hand. He did not slap him, considering it humiliating for a man to do this to another man. Punishments were in the nature of a ritual, which he said he did not find pleasant either – he reiterated that only strong people survive in this world, that if a classmate beat him up at school he should not cry, but punch him back even harder.

He was afraid to tell his father when, once again after being hit by Creg, one of the school donkeys, his glasses broke in half. In panic situations he would run to his mother, who would look at him with terrified eyes and only repeat 'quickly, your father must not find out'.

He and his mother shared secrets, which she told him they could not tell his father so as not to upset him – such things were the sweets she had hidden in one of the containers that pretended to be flour, or the savings she meticulously counted when he was away.

She would say that one should always be prepared, but he didn't understand for what.

One day he found a container of sweets standing by his bedside table and his mother had disappeared, leaving him and his father with only a short note, which his father tore up and said they would never mention her again.

He threw away pictures of her, all her clothes, everything, even his toys or his books, which she was the one who bought and read to him. He only managed to hide one, which was a maths exercise book that had slippery, oiled pages from which he could erase the results of equations at will and fill them in again with a dry erase marker.

This book became his favourite; he would only take it out at night when he was sure his father was already asleep and fill in all the blanks one by one, knowing them by heart.

He created his own ritual.

This calmed him down.

Later, however, these tasks proved too simple and tedious, he needed a challenge and asked his teacher, Mrs Rosaline, to recommend something to learn. She did so willingly, surprised by his diligence, and when he came in the next day saying he had solved all the tasks, she started sending him to maths competitions.

Maths was wonderfully logical and cool – you couldn't interpret it in different ways like poetry, you didn't have to get into the mind of the author of an equation to understand the result. Everything was preconceived and safe, a wrong result could always be explained, you could get to the root of it.

There was no reason to be sad, nervous or happy.

He wasn't happy when he got into the best university in the country without any exams, he wasn't happy that he was one of the few to get his own dorm room and a big scholarship.

When, in high school, his tutor announced to his father that he was a genius and that he should start a career in science, his father was furious.

He said that mathematician was not a profession, that all his life he would remain the victim of fate that he had apparently always been destined to be.

His father told him that he was already a man and not a boy, that he would not beat him with a belt to explain to him that he was not a genius but an idiot.

What he had learnt from his father was not to worry about such words – he would grin at him when he tried to explain to him what a mistake he was making with amusement and satisfaction as he watched the man who told him that emotions were a sign of weakness become enraged.

His father was weak.

He was emotional.

Even the army and the fact that he beat him didn't change that.

He thought that this was probably what his father, that is his grandfather, had tried to instil in him, but he had failed miserably.

He truly believed, however, that his father was right.

He didn't need emotions.

Numbers were enough for him.

He could calculate the probability of whether or not he would be able to communicate with someone by analysing quickly in his head with what frequency that person spoke about things that did not interest him.

He didn't consider whether he liked them and didn't even have any idea how he would have known that. He recognised that deciding on the basis of chemical reactions in his brain about his acquaintances was absurd.

Just because he didn't feel anything didn't mean he wasn't laughing or enjoying himself – on the contrary, he smirked a lot, usually while listening to other people's discussions or when he managed to get someone off balance.

Wealthy alpha males who owed the place he had earned only to their rich parents reigned around the university like kings, pretending to be intelligent, studying law, medicine or banking without having a clue what they were doing were his most common victims.

"I could never defend a rapist or a murderer. I don't know, it makes me flinch at the mere idea." Said Kyle once when they were sitting in the library, them pretending to study, actually sitting over open books they weren't concentrating on and talking, distracting him.

When he needed real focus he would study in his room, but when he felt like a bit of entertainment he would go out to listen to them.

It was better than a comedy in TV.

"After all, every man deserves a defence lawyer, he's innocent until the court hands down a final verdict." Matt, a boy who read a lot and could memorise things, replied, throwing quotes from his sleeve without much understanding of them. Kyle snorted, shrugging his shoulders.

"So what? Sometimes you subconsciously know this person did it by looking at them or the evidence is incriminating enough." He replied with a certainty that surprised him.

He corrected his glasses on his nose with his pointing finger, wondering how this moron was going to defend anyone in court if he himself was constantly undermining his client's innocence in his head while he himself wanted to be the judge against him.

"If it was as you say, there wouldn't be so many innocently convicted people in prison. Evidence seems incriminating until one new clue, piece of evidence or witness comes along that changes everything. It is the duty of the defence counsel to look for such details to the best of his ability, and not to judge his client unless he himself wants to plead guilty." He heard a second, frustrated voice and lifted his gaze, noticing a girl standing by the bookcase who had heard their conversation while looking for some book.

He recognised her only by sight, and knew that she had studied painting, so her person did not interest him at all. However, what she said frustrated Kyle and disturbed his nepotistic sense of superiority, so he gave this scene his full attention.

"I didn't know kids drawing with crayons knew anything about such serious matters as criminal law." He said piteously, a mocking sweetness in his voice, his gaze feigning warmth, meant to bring her out of her funk.

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye and saw that she was looking at him like he was an idiot.

"I don't need to know this to realise that no amount of money will make you a good lawyer. I feel sorry for your future clients, because you will destroy them yourself." She replied, raising her eyebrows in amusement, completely unfazed by his insult.

It surprised him that she looked happy and pleased to see his angry face, not letting him get a word in edgewise, grabbing the book she was looking for and walking off towards her friends sitting at a table in the distance.

On his way out of the library he heard her voice, heard her laugh, light and unforced – he glanced at her and their gazes met for a moment before he walked out into the corridor.

He had forgotten about her until an incident when, sitting in the university restaurant, he noticed Kyle walking past her and pretending to stumble, the entire contents of his cranberry juice spilled on her dress, leaving big pink stains.

"Sorry, are you okay?" He asked, feigning seriousness and concern. She stood up, furious, without even speaking to him, walking away.

He watched curiously as Kyle sat down with his friends and high-fived Matt, clearly pleased with himself, putting his arm around some silly giggling girl.

After a while, however, that girl came back, dressed up, wearing only a man's long-sleeved shirt all soiled with paint, covering the small part of her thighs that she apparently used as an apron while painting, overknee socks and trainers on her legs.

He felt something strange seeing her soft thighs, thinking of the fact that he himself wore similar shirts, and took a sip of coffee from his cup, watching as she sat back next to her friends, saying something quickly, going back to eating her lunch, unconcerned.

She laughed.

He shuddered when their eyes met and quickly glanced at Kyle, who was watching her from afar, licking his lips, his leg moving in impatience, the girl he was embracing whispering something in his ear, but he wasn't listening to her.

He was thinking.

Usually when he had to move from one building to another he went through a side exit, so as to have a bit of peace and quiet, but on this day he decided to walk through the main square, walking on its right side, looking through the windows.

He was not at all searching for her with his eyes when he saw the rows of easels and people around the model, dressed in historic Renaissance costume.

He didn't feel the heat stroke at all and stopped involuntarily when he saw her sitting with her back to him, her canvas smaller than the others, she sat closer, focused only on the portrait.

He could see her underpainting, just an outline and a sketch, and the lines she had drawn to help herself.

The golden ratio.

He shuddered at the thought that she was deliberately using mathematical proportional division to achieve a subconscious effect of harmony in the whole composition, which was, after all, just a base for the actual layer with chiaroscuro and colours.

He gasped when one of his year mates slapped him on the back, asking what he was looking at, and when he saw what he was observing behind the window, he laughed.

"These artists. They will die poor, but at least in their mind they will have created something outstanding. Until a critic comes along who says what they've painted is ugly." He muttered with amusement, putting his arm around him as if they were good mates, although they were not.

He looked back and noticed with pounding heart that this girl was turning over her shoulder, looking in his direction.

His friend had said something about the Mona Lisa, about how ugly she was and that he didn't understand how that portrait could be considered the most beautiful in the world, but he was unable to focus on it.

The golden ratio.

The balance of the composition.

Her painting was thoughtful.

He was convinced that painters only recognised their own artistic intuition and thus created ugly paintings, which they then called contemporary art.

He didn't think about her, or at least tried to until his mates told him that Kyle was throwing a party, to which he was obviously not invited.

"Apparently he even invited the girl he doused with juice at the time as an apology. Bruce says he recently brought her flowers during her classes and that he seems to have a crush on her."

"Sometimes it's one step from hate to love."

He didn't like the uncomfortable feeling he experienced in his chest, a sort of sting and tightness in his throat – he went back to the equation he had just solved without listening to them further.

Even if someone didn't know there was supposed to be any kind of party going on, they had certainly heard it that friday night, the music, laughter and screams from Kyle's room echoing loudly through the dorm.

Even though women weren't allowed in there there were plenty of them that day – he could hear them running to the toilet, squealing and giggling, driving him furious as he couldn't concentrate on what he was reading. He pulled down his glasses, massaging the space between his eyes with his fingers, closing his eyelids, trying to calm himself.

His emotions wouldn't change anything.

He swallowed loudly when he heard her voice.

He shuddered when he heard a knock on his room and looked uncertainly towards his door.

He feared it was Kyle and his pack who had drunkenly decided they would have fun at his expense.

"Can I come in?"

He felt his heart start pounding hard, a multitude of thoughts running through his head. He tried to analyse whether he should do it or not, what she might have wanted from him, but nothing came to mind, there was a complete void in his brain.

God.

"Come in." He heard his own uncertain voice, and after a moment the door opened and there she stood.

She came in smiling and cheerful, happy for some reason, closing the door behind her, looking around his room as if she had come at his invitation – she was wearing a large long-sleeved sweatshirt with the university logo reaching halfway down her thighs, overknee light wool socks and trainers on her legs.

Fuck.

He wanted to say something, to ask why he owed this visit and what she wanted from him, but all he did was stare at her legs, at the small area of her exposed naked body between her sweatshirt and the material of her socks.

He felt a strong pulsing in his black sweatpants and swallowed loudly knowing what it meant.

He'd only fucked twice in his life, and this'd been fairly inept acts of physical intimacy between a man and a woman, where they'd pursued their fulfilment on him, not caring much about him, maybe even imagining he was someone else, some more handsome boy who just happened not to want to look at them.

It didn't bother him, because he didn't feel anything for them himself – they didn't even arouse his desire, but they were just very horny, and he decided that he didn't want to remain a virgin for the rest of his life.

It had been more of a relaxing than a pleasurable experience and he didn't understand why men were so overpowered by it, but now, looking at her, he felt his brain and his logic start to give up in favour of what was going on in his trousers.

"You didn't go to the party?" Her light, gentle voice snapped him out of his reverie, causing him to lift his eyes to her face, which, to his surprise, seemed very pretty up close, her eyes large and bright, framed by long lashes, her pink lips curved in a smile.

What made her so happy?

Why did she come to his room and ask such things?

"No. NFI." He replied dispassionately, lowering his gaze to her legs again, unable to contain himself, covering what was happening to him with a book. She blinked, furrowing her brow.

"What?" She asked with amusement and curiosity.

"Not Fucking Invited." He explained and she burst into soft laughter – he wasn't sure he'd ever heard anyone react like that to anything he'd said.

"Maybe it's better for you too. I went there for a while, but they act like pigs in a shed. A friend told me I could find you here so I thought I'd take the opportunity." She said calmly, walking over to his desk, leaning over his books. He wondered with a pounding heart how she had the confidence to just walk into a stranger's room and talk to him as if she had known him for years.

He chuckled and shook his head, running his hand over his face in an attempt to hide his nervousness and what his imagination was suggesting.

"Are you going to tell me why you came here, or are you going to continue wasting my time?" He muttered ironically, figuring that by doing so he would somehow discourage her or force her to stop pestering him.

He blinked and lifted his knees higher when she suddenly sat down next to him on his bed, as if just waiting for that question, excitement in her eyes.

"I've heard you're a mathematical genius and that's a very good thing, because I need someone to help me determine the right proportions for my painting."

She said quickly and he felt his heart beat harder, he got warm in his lower abdomen and all he could think about was wanting to back off and run away.

"Isn't the golden ratio and Fibonacci spiral enough for you?" He muttered, knowing that it was these two proportions that were usually enough for artists to create their compositions. She hit her knees with her palms as if he had said exactly what she assumed.

"No! I want to analyse it more, but I don't have the tools to do it. Nor an exact mind. I want you to help me, take a look at my sketch and tell me what you think could be improved. From a mathematical, compositional point of view." She said with an excitement that frightened him in a way, a gush of enthusiasm that he didn't know what to do, how to discourage her with.

"What's in it for me?" He asked, recognising that perhaps a materialistic approach would discourage her, yet she merely twisted in her seat, completely unmoved, apparently recognising that he was entitled to demand payment for his contribution to her work.

"And what would you like?" She asked lightly, and he swallowed loudly, his gaze involuntarily escaping to her thighs, to where he could see her bare skin.

He looked at her face again, hoping she hadn't seen it, but something in her gaze told him she had noticed it, her lips tightened. He his heart began to pound like crazy, he felt like he was just going through some kind of heart attack.

"Do you want this?" She asked softly, warmly, and he threw her a shocked look, wondering if she was implying what he was thinking, his gaze escaping to her thighs again.

Fuck.

Did he want this?

"What do you mean?" He asked coolly, trying to pretend he didn't know what she was talking about. He felt his pupils dilate as she corrected herself in her seat so that her sweatshirt lifted up slightly, he had a feeling that a little more would have been enough for him to see her underwear.

"You can touch me if you want. Just gently. Don't throw yourself at me." She said softly, a blush on her cheeks, her eyes warm and understanding – he thought she seemed slightly embarrassed, her words sounding innocent despite the obvious subtext.

He wasn't sure if his mind controlled the movement of his hand, the way it involuntarily rose and gently touched her thigh, stroking it in a slow, steady up and down motion. He heard her sigh softly and a shudder went through her, saw her lean back and close her eyes.

He wanted to tell her that she thought too highly of herself if she thought he was so desperate, but instead he just looked at her with his lips slightly parted, fighting with himself.

He glanced at her face again when, after a moment, she opened her eyes and looked at him with a warm, misty gaze, as if she had drifted away with her thoughts somewhere for a moment. She smiled, but there was no mockery in it, her expression had something of girlish innocence.

He couldn't focus on anything other than the thought of how soft and firm her skin was – he wasn't sure he had ever touched anything more pleasurable in his life.

He felt both shame and thrill at the thought of how painfully hard he was, swallowing with difficulty.

He didn't quite understand what was just happening between them – his mind wanted to classify this as a prelude to physical intimacy, but he wasn't sure he was right. He felt immense tension and lust, but also a sort of tightening in his pit, intrigue and anxious anticipation.

"If you want, we can kiss. You have such full lips." She said softly with some kind of admiration and sincere desire, from which he felt a squeeze in his throat.

He wasn't good at choosing his words when it came to this kind of discussion, and he didn't know completely how to act, so he just stared at her, her thigh under his hand seeming to almost burn him.

Seeing the lack of any reaction from him and the clear shock painted on his face she moved a little closer to him – there was something encouraging in her movement and gaze, some kind of comfort and concern.

She was close, but far enough away to still not invade his space, giving him the sense that she was waiting for his decision.

He stared at her, feeling that his erection hidden in his trousers was about to explode, all swollen and throbbing, and after a moment their lips pressed against each other in a sudden, wet dance of their tongues and teeth, their hands clenched in each other's hair, the loud, lewd click of their saliva echoing in his ears louder than the muffled music coming from several rooms away.

"Be gentle." She just whispered into his mouth between their drawn-out, sticky kisses, and he hummed at her words, smelling the pleasant scent of her shampoo in his nose.

He grabbed her softly around her waist and seated her on his thighs with his arm around her, throwing his book to the side, rubbing against her from underneath, letting her feel what she had done to him.

He heard her sigh in contentment at feeling how hard he was, both of them beginning to pant loudly as she began to roll against him with her hips, herself clearly taking pleasure from it.

He clamped his hands on her buttocks and drew in the air loudly feeling that she had no shorts on underneath, just her underwear alone, and for some reason it turned him on even more.

Had she planned this all along?

She moaned feeling his hands slip under the material of her panties and squeeze her bare skin with confidence – she ran her fingers through his hair as the tip of her pink, wet tongue ran over his upper lip. He felt a strong shiver run through his entire body and involuntarily began to pant along with her, having never experienced anything like this before.

Her touch, though filled with desire, was not cold and crude, focused only on her pleasure, her hands stroking his hair, his cheeks, his neck with tender, caring movements, her puffy, full lips merely teasing him, not wanting to give him any more full kisses, so he only growled, frustrated, pulling her forcibly tighter, sliding his tongue deep into her throat.

He didn't even feel the need to undress her, the very thing they were doing now, the senselessness and yet purposefulness of it made him shiver, her certainty of what she wanted.

Was she really going to do this?

Sleep with a total stranger?

What was the logic in this?

He shuddered at the thought that maybe there was none.

None.

She wouldn't let him think about it – he drew in the air loudly as he felt her nimble fingers untie his sweatpants, slipping them down slightly, exposing what was underneath them, his hard, twitching manhood enveloped by the cool air.

He saw her rise slightly, with a movement of her hand apparently pushing the material of her underwear aside, positioning herself above him as he grasped his length in his hand, automatically directing it between her thighs.

"− I'm taking pills − I'm clean −" She whispered softly and he just nodded, not knowing what more he could answer, looking at her with his lips slightly parted, feeling like his heart was about to jump out of his chest.

She lifted herself up with a loud click of her moisture only to fall back down, riding him in a slow, unhurried rhythm – he just leaned down and sank his face into the hollow of her neck, taking in her scent, pleasantly sweet and fresh, panting loudly.

They both moaned embarrassingly loudly and squeezed their eyelids shut as she lowered herself onto him, slowly pushing the fat head of his cock deep into her body.

He could feel how wet she was, how her fleshy muscles pulsed hungrily against him, how tightly they wrapped around his root on all sides miraculously enhancing his sensation.

She embraced him, stroking his hair, clearly sensing his uncertainty, terror and desire mixed together. Unwittingly, his hips began to respond to her movements with sure, deep thrusts, to which she moaned loudly, something of helplessness and delight in her sounds.

"− do you want to stop? −" She mumbled softly, kissing his hair with gentle, warm click. He lifted his face finding her lips in a greedy kiss before turning her onto her back, recognising that he couldn't take it any longer, that his cock was about to explode.

"− yeah − I want to stop very, very much −" He growled frustrated at the way she was teasing him, resting one hand on the backrest of the bed in front of him, the other holding her hip tightly, slamming into her with rapid, quick stabs of his hips from which she began to moan and pant loudly, startled, looking up at him with her lips slightly parted.

"− don't you feel it? −" He asked ironically, thrusting his cock so deep into her that he felt like he would pierce her stomach, her body arched backwards as if trying to escape from him, his thighs all sticky from her moisture, their bodies smacking against each other quickly with a loud, wet slaps.

"− please −" She mewled and he felt a shudder as well as heat in his lower abdomen, something in the way she said it, in the tone of her voice, in her gaze made him lick his lips feeling that just a moment more, a few more thrusts and he was about to come.

"− please, what? − can't you put a fucking sentence together anymore? − you like it when someone fucks you so rough that you don't have words, huh? −" He hissed and groaned low as he felt her walls clench tightly around his fat erection at his words, sucking it inside, her thighs spread wide in front of him, allowing him to slide into her as deeply as he wanted in a gesture of complete submission.

"− I'm sorry −" She mumbled, looking at him helplessly like a rebuked child looking at a parent, and he thought he could devour her whole right now, fuck her all night if she wanted to, if she would react the way she did now.

"− good you're sorry − fucking brat −" He growled, panting loudly along with her and suddenly, without even knowing why, he kissed her greedily, pounding his cock into her with quick, brutal thrusts.

He felt her come, her walls began to clench on him greedily, not wanting to let him go, her whole body was trembling – she tried to push him away, sobbing and moaning with pleasure into his mouth.

He fucked her through her orgasm until he finally gave in and cum inside her, panting loudly, not recognising himself, his sounds or his reactions.

"− oh God − fuck − fuck − fuck −" He mumbled clenching his eyes, coming down from his peak, still moving inside her, hearing her loud breathing underneath him.

What exactly was that?

He collapsed on top of her, completely powerless, smelling the scent of her hair, her hands embracing his waist. They laid like that in the light of his bedside lamp, breathing heavily, listening to the muffled music, the screams and laughter from the party taking place a few rooms away.

He swallowed loudly feeling that he wasn't sure where his body ended and hers began – they were both all sticky from her moisture, her insides hot, pleasantly enveloping him on all sides, giving him some strange sense of security.

He thought it was for some of the hormones that are released after orgasm designed to bring partners closer together and bond.

He shuddered when he suddenly heard her soft, quiet voice.

"So what do you say? Will you help me?" She asked shyly, and he sighed heavily, silent for a long moment.

No.

"Yes."

_____

Part 2 − Formula for perfection

@at-a-rax-ia @daemonskelitsos @alphard-hydraes-blog @travelingmypassion

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