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Potty Mouth Lahote

Concept: Paul and reader have a three-year-old son who loves to repeat new words he’s never heard before.

          It was a normal Thursday afternoon when you decided to get some quick housework done while Paul was at Sam’s for the pack meeting. You had managed to wrangle your three-year-old down for his nap upstairs, wash the remaining dishes from this morning’s breakfast, and throw a load of laundry into the washer and dryer each. Just as you were busy moving some things around to thoroughly clean the floors your son comes bustling down the stairs. “Mommy mommy!” little Isaac comes running into the living room completely oblivious to the vacuum chord lying in the middle of the hardwood floor. “Ow Fuck!” he yelps as he goes flying over the chord and face plants to the ground. You quickly drop what you’re doing and pick your son off the floor just as your ears finally registered what has come out of your child’s mouth. “Isaac Nathaniel Lahote, WHAT just came out of your mouth?!” you exclaim shell-shocked. “Oh fuck mommy?” Isaac responds looking up with those innocent brown eyes. You were at a loss for words. It was obvious he had no idea what he said was inappropriate, but you also didn’t know where he picked that up from until you remembered whom you chose to procreate with…

“Paul Lahote wait til you get home” you muttered to yourself.  

            You explained to Isaac that the F word was not something that should ever be coming out of his mouth again until he was 45. Then you turned on his favorite Paw Patrol episode as you finished the rest of your work and waited for Paul to come home. About 30 minutes later you heard the lock on the front door click and Isaac yell “Daddy!” from where you were in the kitchen.  You counted Paul’s steps as he made it into the kitchen with Isaac in his arms hugging his neck for dear life. “Hello beautiful” Paul leaned down to peck your lips. “Ew daddy! Get a room!” Isaac exclaimed as he hid his face in Paul’s neck. Paul chuckled as he set your son down and he took off to go finish his favorite show. As Isaac walked out you placed both hands on your hips with your eyebrows raised to the Gods glaring at Paul.

 “I’ve been gone all day what could I have possibly done now?” Paul shrugged.

“Paul, we’ve talked about this before. Isaac is at that age where he’s like a sponge one wrong false move and he will soak it up and never let go. You have to be better about your language.” You scolded. Paul furrowed his brows, “What did he say?” You glanced out the door to see if Isaac was listening, but he was too busy being engrossed with the television. “Paul he said the…F word” You whispered like a secret your life depended on.

 Paul tried hard to hide the smile that was threatening to appear on his face. Alas, he couldn’t contain himself and let out a grunt like chuckle. You smacked his chest with the back of your hand, “It’s not funny Paul! I don’t want our son growing up to be some butt face miscreant!” At this Paul snorted. “Like his father” you deadpanned.

“Hey!” Paul looked genuinely offended but kept on “I have no idea where he would get that from! It wasn’t from me. I don’t even say the F word anymore, if I need to call one of the guys out I just call them a mother frogger I swear!” He insisted.  

 “Ugh Paul, then where would he get that from?” you pressed on. You guessed this would be one unsolved mystery for the books. Maybe Isaac picked it up from the T.V. or even from one of the guys without them realizing, but the question was which one?

            The next day Paul drove you and Isaac down to help Emily cook for the bonfire tonight. Some of the guys were in the living room playing video games as you three walked into the house. “Holy fucking shit dude you suck at this game!” Quil belted out just as Isaac ran up for his “turn” to play. You and Paul froze, looked at each other, and then zoned straight in on Quil and Isaac. Isaac looked up at you with big excited eyes “Holy shit mama!” he proudly exclaims. All of a sudden the room went silent. Everyone zoned in on you and Paul’s reaction. Paul decided to break the silence “Oh Quil buddy I think you should start running now.” Just as Quil is about to question Paul he takes a look at your furious eyes and bolts out the sliding door.

 “Quil you mother frogger get your butt back in here!” you storm outside after him.    

 A/N: How did I do for my first imagine? I’ve written before but this is the first for this blog. I’m rusty. Requests are open if anyone would like one or for feedback (: