#so i'm just hoping that soon my cats will destroy it so i have an excuse to switch it out

[deanpinterester]

once again watching room makeover videos and wishing i could do SOMETHING to my room

[minhosimthings]

Gilded Skin || 18+

Synopsis: A makeout session with your tattoo artist neighbour

Pairings: tattoo artist!Jay × fem!reader

Warnings: SMUT MINORS DNI 18+, Dom!Jay, sub!reader, fingering, p in v sex, rough sex, exhibitionism, semi-public sex, manhandling because idk I love Jay's hands, kinda pervert Jay, unprotected sex (not for you), swearing, use of "sweetheart"

A/N: for you my beloved @jaeyunluvr. Also possibly my last work for in a while since I'm getting kinda busy!

Tattoos.

Controversial (to some people) as they were, you loved them.

The mere thought of getting a tattoo scared you though, yes they were pretty, but number one, money and number two, needles. But soon enough, your friend, Heeseung, who was ironically a tattoo artist himself convinced you to pay a visit to the tattoo parlour.

Normally you would have refused, stating the usual excuse of 'I'm busy maybe next time?'. But lo and behold to Heeseung's ears you agreed this time.

"It's because of that hot guy there isn't it?" Heeseung snickered, his hands on the steering wheel as he drove you to the parlour.

'That hot guy' aka your new neighbour, aka the tattoo artist at the new tattoo parlour that had opened up down the street.

Even though it had been just a two minute walk's distance from you, Heeseung insisted on coming to the parlour with you. Although his actual motives were to see you absolutely melt infront of the man you had a cunt-destroying crush on, he kept on with the absolute lie that he was trying to be a supportive friend, and also obseve the artists at the parlor.

"He has a name you know." You rolled your eyes as Heeseung parked his car into the alleyway, "It's Jay or something."

"So we can no longer call him 'hot guy'?" Heeseung asked, seemingly amused by the way you were fiddling with your fingers, "Shame, I liked that nickname. What do you like about him anyway?"

What did you like about him. What answer could you have possibly given to that? Of course there were so many factors. The fact that he was your new neighbour but you still hadn't talked to him, the fact that he fed the street cats, the fact that he-

"His hands."

Heeseung's reaction was... appropriate to say the least. His choking on air made you roll your eyes, as you slapped his back to make him calm down. Then after a few moments of silence, he burst out laughing.

"His WHAT?" Heeseung held his stomach as raucous laughs escaped his lips, "Please don't tell me you're being serious right now." He doubled over again, almost hitting his head to the car's ceiling.

"Oh shut up, you're talking as if you're any better." You rolled your eyes, opening the car door, with Heeseung doing the same, "Remember last September when you-"

"Do not even start right now." Heeseung glared, slamming his car door shut, "Come on, don't want to keep the hands waiting do we?"

Taking a deep breath and letting it out rather too quickly, you pushed on the neon pink decorated door, which opened with a tinkling sound. The smell of lavender hung around, an unfamiliar scent for a tattoo store, which was covered in rock posters from head to toe, along with a few blue beads here and there, the kind Heeseung liked to collect.

"Hey." You greeted the red haired girl behind the counter, "I have an appointment under the name Y/N."

The girl looked up and sent you a quick smile before looking down at her computer, her eyes whipping around before finding a spot she thought was satisfactory.

"Yep right here." She popped her lips together, "I'll see if anyone is free Ma'am, could you wait for a minute?"

You smiled at her as if to say yes and plopped down on the couch next to Heeseung, who had been analysing the store with a lot of vigour in his eyes.

"It's fancy." He whispered, eyeing the girl at the counter, "Let's just hope your man comes out and you can get to catcall him before he goes."

"I am not going to catcall him, im not you." You chuckled, getting distracted from the conversation when you saw a black haired figure from the corner of your eye.

"Is that-?" Heeseung didn't even have to finish his sentence. He knew, judging from the look in your eyes and the fact that your mouth fell slightly open, that this was the person he ever so passionately called "your man".

You were mesmerised.

No, mesmerised wasn't the right word.

You were starstruck.

Maybe your hormones were on a whole different level, maybe you had just been dick-deprived for a long time, or maybe it was the lavender fumes, but you truly thought you had seen a Greek God fill the vision of your corneas.

"Y/N. Y/N!"

You felt Heeseung's elbow jab you painfully in the side, which was effective in breaking you out of your stupor. You blinked a couple of times, to see the red haired woman and Jay looking at you in what seemed to be amusement.

The woman coughed to defuse the seeming tention, you swore you could feel Heeseung awkwardly smiling for your left.

Well they always say bad beginnings have good endings don't they?

"So," A steady hand carefully polished the silver of the miniscule needle, "Y/N was it?"

Though the air conditioning was turned onto a high, you could feel sweat drops form at your forehead, why were his hands polishing the needle so erotically?

"Y-Yeah. You're Jay right?" You managed to cough out, feeling yourself immediately melt into the chair leather chain again when his eyes fell on you. His eyes were sharp as an eagle's, seemingly darting around to catch it's prey, but never leaving one point of focus.

"Nervous?" Jay chuckled, "Don't be, unless you're chronically afraid of needles."

"I am." You laughed, leaning back a little more comfortably on the chair, "Probably shouldn't have gotten a tattoo then should I?"

"Perhaps not on your most sensitive area." Jay nodded, sitting in front of you, his legs spread wide open, did he realise how welcoming that was to you?, "Most people go for the arm, I'm surprised you went for your thigh."

"Heeseung told me it doesn't hurt much." You braced yourself in the chair at the sight of Jay's needle pressing into his tattoo machine, "He's a tattoo artist too."

"I should make a friend of him then." Jay chuckled, looking into your eyes, he could bore deepwells in them and you thought you'd forgive such a handsome man like him, "How did you meet him?"

"Are you-" you gave him a funny look, "Are you trying to make conversation with me?"

"It helps most of them." Jay shrugged and smiled at you, you noticed his dimple come off his cheek, the one you saw last week, whilst spying on him from your bedroom window.

"So, new neighbour who I've never talked to until now," Jay raised his eyes up to you, "How about some conversation to lessen the pain?"

You had always known since you were a child that you had the attention span of a butterfly, eyes always zooming from one place to the other, but you never knew all you needed was a handsome face and some pretty hands to get you to focus.

Jay's deep voice soothed into your nerves, effectively proving his theory of "more talk, less pain". You hadn't noticed much of the tattooing process, except for a few instances here and there when his knuckles brushed across the skin of your thigh, making you mold your orgasmic whimpers into 'painful' winces. You could physically hear Heeseung in your brain telling you about your pain kink.

"So any relationship goals?" Jay asked you, your eyes briefly meeting with his, as his fingers stopped to move across the cross section, "I know that's sorta personal, don't answer if you don't want to."

"No it's fine." You laughed, pretending as if you didn't maniacally want to answer the question, "I'm still single for now, and as for goals, I'm free for ramen tomorrow, and that's it."

"So how about ramen tomorrow then?" Jay smiled, looking up at you, his hands coming to a halt and resting softly on your thigh.

"Will we be eating or will we be talking like this?" You chuckled, your brain fog capturing you entirely as you had no idea what words were coming out of your mouth, "Because to be honest, I'd just be staring at either your lips or your hands if we do either of them."

The most painful part of getting a tattoo, according to the internet, was the beginning part, when you'd be so scared, because apparently fear paralyses you more than the actual tattoo process. But you now knew, the most painful part would probably be Jay's amused eyes staring at you, while your brain managed to catch up with what you just said.

"Oh- no! No I'm so sorry—i didn't mean-"

"It's fine sweetheart." Jay's soft voice stopped your panicking, he stifled a chuckle at your behaviour. Adorable, he thought.

"No I'm really sorry Jay, I shouldn't have said that." You apologised again, feeling the heat come upto your cheeks.

"Oh sweetheart." Jay chuckled, leaning in towards you, "Do you really think I had no idea of your pretty little face spying on me through your window?"

He knew?

"I must admit, you look cute in that flimsy tank top, which hides nothing by the way." His deep voice rang through your eardrums, "but don't worry, I won't press charges or anything on you for spying."

Your back pressed against the leather of the leaning chair, as Jay put his tattoo machine down. Taking off his gloves, his tongue swept across his lips in a swift motion, as his hands trapped you in a cage, laying on either side of you.

"May I?" Jay asked, not even waiting for permission, he already knew the next thing to come out of your mouth was a pathetic whimper.

Without a moment's waste, his soft lips landed on yours, hands rubbing to take off your shorts.

You soon became lost in his presence, lips meeting his in a fiery kiss. his tongue pushed past, kissing you like his life depended on it.

"Fuck sweetheart." Jay said, "You taste good."

You moaned quietly into his mouth, feeling his fingers trail down and start to rub your clit. Your hand came down to grab his cock, already half hard, and you could feel him growing with each stroke you gave him.

His fingers slipped past your clit, toying with your opening and eventually plunging in as deep as he could with the angle he was at. Your head fell back, resting on the leather of the chair as your pussy fluttered around his fingers.

“fuck, you're so tight.,” he managed to say through gritted teeth, chuckling as you let out a stifled whimper, "You like that baby? You like my fingers hm?"

He began to set a fast pace, one of his hands gripping your hip to keep you in place for him and the other hand next to your head. you could see the veins in his arms as it flexed beside you, no doubt he was trying to hold back.

Small whimpers came out of your mouth with each thrust, but then you heard it. Footsteps outside the room, you had forgotten you were in a public place in the heat of the moment. The footsteps died down after a few seconds.

“Just gonna have to keep those pretty sounds in. Wouldn’t want them to hear you,” You clenched down at that.

He chuckled, a devilish, almost cruel sounding chuckle like he had something in mind.

“oh you like that, huh? Like the idea of someone walking in on us fucking in here, watching us. Watching you come apart on my fingers. You’d like that, wouldn’t you baby? Dirty fucking slut.”

At that moment, he made it his mission to make you cum, hard. keeping one hand clamped around your mouth to stifle your moans, your eyes practically rolled back into your head when his fingers touched a particularly sensitive position, the new position making his fingers fuck impossibly deeper into you.

As you were nearing release Jay pulled away standing up, quickly unbuckling his pants to unveil his already hard twitching cock eager to pound into you.

“gonna let me fuck you princess? gonna be a good girl for me?” he says, stroking his dick as he swipes his thumb over his slit wiping away his precum yet it still spews out, covering thumbs in the substance

He held the base of his cock, dragging the tip in between your wet folds, before slowly pushing himself into you, causing a groan to escape from the back of his throat.

His hands grabbing onto your hips, he began to slowly move his hips watching your pussy swallow his cock.

“You feel so fucking good” he said as he began to pick up the pace. Your hand moved up to your mouth blocking out the moans leaving your lips, doing your very best to stay quiet enough so others wouldn’t hear your lewd sounds.

Jay's thrusts became rough, his hand releasing your hip entangling his fingers through your hair tugging on it as he pounded into you. “You’re such a good girl, taking me so well”. 

“fuck…you’re so tight” he says, pulling your legs up to sit on his shoulders as he thrusts inside you at a steady motion, fucking you deliciously in missionary. His eyes stare at your tits that are bouncing with each motion he pulls you in.

“fuck baby..i’m gonna cum…gonna cum inside” he says as he gets that dumb look on his face, he squeezes your breast with white knuckles as something to hold on to while his eyes roll back in his head, a beam of his sweat falling on your chest.

your orgasm comes as his does, his dick twitching inside of your cunt making it almost impossible to keep going.

“m’gonna cum too…” you whimper, wrapping your legs around his waist, pushing him further into you to feel his cum covering your walls. the warm liquid coming fast inside you.

as Jay pulls out, he’s met with his mess, the pool of his cum leaking out of your cunt.

His fingers make their way down and pump inside of you, the squelching noise of your wet pussy filling the room. His fingers make their way out of your cunt and up to your mouth, pushing in his cum covered fingers inside your mouth.

“Suck sweetheart.” he demands, and so you do. You suck the mixture of cum off of his fingers while maintaining eye contact, his thumb cradling your chin for support. You could get intoxicated on those eyes for centuries.

Jay's thumb swept out of your mouth swiftly, as his lips landed on yours again, pressing you into a sweet and chaste kiss, breathing heavily as he pulled away and supported your tired structure with his strong arms. You could see the veins flex on his hands.

"So how about that ramen date tomorrow hm?" Jay asked, his dimple once again appearing on his cheek, "that is, if you can handle staring at my hands while I eat."

"A ramen date, if I can walk by tomorrow." You chuckled, "So, I guess this messy hair is because I was struggling too much out of pain while getting the tattoo? Or should I tell Heeseung something else?"

"Tell him how good of an artist I am." Jay chuckled, "And that his friend won't have to spy through bedroom windows anymore."

"Was I really that noticeable?" You rolled your eyes playfully, as Jay handed you your shorts.

"Sweetheart you have no idea."

[womanofwords]

Darling Demon (Part 20)

Yandere!batfam x betrothed!neglected!male!reader x yandere!demon!spouse

TW: animal cruelty (from the animal).

You decided to take a break from Azrir and check in on your family. You'd been 'sleeping over' at 'Ally's' place for a while now, and it was about time you made your way to Wayne Manor. Mostly for Alfred.

"Y/N, if you come to any harm when you visit your family, I will never allow you to go back," Azrir said. You agreed.

"So, Y/N, when will Ally finally meet us?" Bruce asked. "I hope we haven't scared her away from you."

"You haven't," you assured.

"I'm more worried about scaring Y/N away from us," Dick said, messing up your hair. There was Dick's smothering affection on display.

"Grayson, unhand my brother," Damian ordered. "If your filthy fingers are not pried off of his body in five seconds, I will be forced to beurble hugh burbpfffffft." His thumb jammed itself into his mouth before he could finish his threat.

"Are you OK, Damian?" you asked, trying not to laugh. "Why are you sucking your thumb?"

"Because he's just a little boy, Y/N," Jason said. "And little boys have thumb-sucking habits."

"He looks like Prince John from Disney's Robin Hood," Stephanie snarked.

"He's missing a crown," Duke mused. "There you go." Duke's light powers illuminated a crown for Damian, and his siblings laughed it up even harder.

"Damian, does this happen every time you try to talk?" Alfred asked.

"Almost always," Damian grumbled. The thumb had decided to give him a break. "I can't get a word in edgeways to my idiot siblings."

"Have you tried not threatening them?" you asked.

"It's the only way they'll understand!" Damian insisted.

"Well, that won't go well for you," you said. "Please, Damian, try to be nice to people for once. Start with your siblings."

"OK," Damian said. He'd just had an incredible idea. If all he had to do was be nice to his siblings, then he should start with you.

Damian wrote like a maniac as he completed an apology letter for you. You were going to love this so, so much. This was going to go much better than the Brothers Grimm stories he'd tried to show you.

Alfred The Cat whined with the humiliation of it all as Damian draped him in frilly bows. "Stop whining," Damian scolded. "We have to show Y/N that we can be nice. I'm going to read him this apology note for everything I put him through and all you have to do is be cute. I would use Titus for this, since he's better trained, but he gives Y/N nightmares."

Damian took his apology note and Alfred The Cat and journeyed to your room. "Y/N, are you there?" he called. As he waited and rehearsed, Alfred The Cat fussed in his arms. You had better show up soon.

"Damian, where did you get the cat from?" you asked.

"This is Alfred The Cat, not to be confused with Alfred. We're both trying to be your friend," Damian said. Alfred The Cat meowed pitifully, limbs waving like a child that wanted to be carried by a specific person.

"Aww, he does look cute," you said, picking up the cat as if it was a baby.

That was the straw that broke the kitty's back.

Alfred was a tornado of claws and screeches, not sure whether to abandon everything and leave or to destroy the earth itself, starting with you. "Alfred The Cat, stop it right now!" Damian screamed. "You're hurting Y/N!"

Azrir plunged into the scene, grabbing you. "You. I should have eaten you when I first arrived," they growled, advancing on Damian.

"Baba!" Damian screamed. Bruce rushed over, finding Azrir looming over his two boys. He had a mace; where he'd gotten it from, you were never going to ask him.

"You will not harm my son," Bruce hissed. "I don't know why you won't leave him alone, but you can't be in his life. Y/N is dating a girl named Ally now."

"Leave Y/N alone!" Dick shrieked, completely unannounced and completely ridiculous.

Azrir pretended to be surprised. "Girl? What girl? Oh, you must mean me." Azrir shifted into the female form they took on when they first came to Wayne Manor. "Hi, is Y/N home?"

"You monster!" Dick screamed. He rushed towards them, escrima sticks bared and ready to fight. Azrir was in his ear in a blink of an eye.

"Grayson, if you fight me, I will take you to hell, lock you in a room, and force you to watch your little brother being corrupted by me for all eternity," Azrir hissed. It was low enough for only him to hear, but he backed off all the same.

"What do you want?" Bruce asked. Your siblings were gathering behind him, looking like little kids eavesdropping on a conversation they weren't supposed to be hearing.

"I allowed Y/N to see you on the condition that if he was hurt in any way, he would never come back." Azrir surveyed you, throwing Alfred The Cat at Damian. "He has been hurt under your watch."

"I'm sorry," Damian said. "I just wanted to show him my kitty." Alfred The Cat meowed, as if it was an apology.

"I stand by my choice. Y/N will never come back to the manor. Instead, he will live in the love nest I made for him, journeying to the human world when he wants to with me as his protector." Azrir looked closely at your face, clawed, but nothing permanent. "Y/N, nothing these filthy relatives have to offer will ever hurt you again."

"Azrir, can I at least see Alfred?" you asked. "He was so kind to me."

"Of course you can, Y/N," Azrir said. "Come along. I'll make sure those scratches don't scar."

You were whisked away by a very concerned demon, who spent a lot of time gently tending to your face. "It honestly just stings."

"You shouldn't be in any kind of pain," Azrir shushed. "Come here, my fragile little trophy. Let yourself be cared for."

You relaxed into the care session, letting the tenseness of your muscles loosen and leave you. You were going to be cared for in every possible way. Azrir would take care of you in every way possible.

You were really going to like living in hell if hell meant a big, mean demon took care of your every need and threatened to kill anything that moved wrong near you.

Taglist: @tinybrie, @bunniotomia, @c4xcocoa, @darkmoka, @fightmebissh, @bloobewy, @chi1lllb, @cqerrz, @heart-cream, @noone1233nobody, @type-ink, @sonyboos, @atlasbatman05, @eyeless-kun, @zomqiez.

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[mr-crawlings-wife]

No Way Home

Prologue-3

Previous part, Masterlist. Next part

Warnings: ooc

"Off With Your Head!" Riddle yelled the incantation and almost instantaneously a heavy heart-shaped collar was conjured around Grim's little neck.

Kalim rubbed his neck, "Ooo- wouldn't want that happening to me ever." I remained silent.

"MYAH?! What are you doing?!" Grim was stupified, as if he fully expected himself to be able to get away with destroying all this furniture.

"The Queen of Heart's Rule 23: 'One must never bring a cat to a formal affair.' " Riddle retorted.

Who is that? The Dowager empress? Not a consort for sure...... Queen...must be a small land that she rules over..

"Your very presence here is a violation of order. You will vacate these premises immediately." Riddle demanded.

Does the Queen of Hearts fall ill in the presence of a cat? Or is it simple disdain?

"But I ain't a cat either!" Grim attempted to argue. If you looked close enough you could almost see the sadness slowly clouding his eyes. But it didn't last for long as his gaze soon became fierce and determined.

"Don't try to collar me! I'll burn it right off! " He opened his maw to its full capacity and exhaled with all his might.

But nothing came out except humid air.

"Huh...? Wh-what gives? My fire ain't workin'!" He seemed shocked but there was an underlying hint of devastation.

"Until I deign to remove that collar, you won't be using any magic. You're naught but a pet cat now." Riddle seemed quite pleased with himself. His arms crossed and his chest slightly puffed. A proud man.

" M-meoWHAT?! I ain't nobody's pet-NOTHING!" Grim was quite offended.

"Oh, you've nothing to worry about there. I certainly have no interest in having you as a pet. The collar will disappear once you're removed from campus."

The silver headed man that really didn't contribute much to this goose chase, spoke up. Showering Riddle with praise.

"Ha-HA! Good show as always, Riddle. You're signature spell locks down any magic. It's quite handy."

They seem to be quite friendly with eachother. Perhaps they're of the same ranks. Colleagues, maybe. Though, Riddle doesn't seem all too fond of him.

Something about the way he speaks sounds like he has ulterior motives.

Crow man knocked the tiles with his cane, "THROW HIM OUT! I shall spare it from being served as dinner. My, but I AM kind." but his commands seem to carry no weight.

Crickets.

" ...Someone take this away, please."

The Silver head from before instructed, a smooth hand rubbing his temples.

Everybody seems to carry a disdain for the headmage.

A boy with teal hair, like the ocean water on a sunny day, stepped up and seized Grim by his scruff.

"Nooooo! Let me gooooo! You fools better remember my name! Cause I'm gonna go down in the annals of magic history! Just you wait!" His voice faded out as he was carried away. If you looked close enough you could see the tiny beads at the edge of his waterline.

"Poor guy." Kalim mumbled from beside me.

I don't particularly share his sentiment. I can't help not feeling anything for the beast that chased me around. But it sure is a tragic thing for his dreams to be crushed in such a way. I don't give it further thought.

I walked towards crow man, bowing low, my voice hopeful. "Sir, dince you can perform magic, is there a way you could send me back home? If you would be so kind."

Crow man smiled instantaneously at my words."Yes, I AM kind. But how come? You don't want to remain here? This is the first time a student has refused enrollment." His confusion appeared to be genuine.

"Well my liege-"

"Can she really be a student here if she's a magicless normie?" That glass slate spoke, it's voice mocking. It floated over to where me and crow man were standing. Coming face to face with its headmage. Practically inches from my back.

He has basically locked me in place.

"Wouldn't that be outrageous headmaster?“

What pleasures does he get from mocking me?

How does the glass slate even qualify? I thought the requirements were to be human?? Or... at least humanoid...

I have the urge to stand up straight and project this glass slate across the podium. And I do. I don't know what seized me. Perhaps spite.

"Right you are Shroud." Crow man hums, looking away just as I stand up and yeet the thing, but it regains balance quickly and knocks the back of my head with it's... strangely metal like body?

"I'll circle back to you later." Crow man puts his hand on my shoulder, as I rub the back of my head. A snort and cackle coming from the slate of glass.

"He means nerver..." The blond man's whisper echoed from behind me.

Crow man faced the chattering students and clapped once, "Well, that was quite the unexpected fracas. I hereby declare that orientation has concluded."

Raising his hand, he gestured in the general direction of the glass slate, the blond man, the silver head, Riddle, Kalim and the lazy man.

So all of them are people in power.. WAIT THE GLASS SLATE TOO??

"Housewardens, please escort your students back to the dorms."

But then he frowned, "...Hm? Come to think of it, I don't see Housewarden Draconia of House Diasomnia anywhere."

"And that surprises you? Dude's a total recluse." The lazy man drawled as he stretched and yawned as I was sweating bullets. Worried about what would happen to me for disrespecting the sentient glass.

Kalim perked up, "Wait a sec... Did anyone even invite him?"

This Draconia seems to be a prominent figure.

The blond man picked at his nails as I bit my cheeks and glared at the floor., "If you're that worried about him missing out, maybe you should have told him yourself."

Kalim shrunk back, sheepish. "Maybe, but I don't know him too well either..."

"Draconia... Like, Malleus Draconia? THAT Draconia?"

"So it's true? He really does go to school here?"

"Yikes."

Mutters floated through the crowd of students.

This Draconia must be a feared individual.

"Ah. Just as I'd expected." A deep and rich voice spoke.

I turned around to put a face to the voice.

And it was hard to believe.

This man looked like a child.

He was almost as short as me...

"I figured I'd come down and see for myself whether Malleus had made an appearance."

I took deep breaths to calm myself as he spoke.

So Draconia is a last name. To call such a feared individual by their first name. This boy... he's close to Draconia. Which means he's also powerful.

All this powerful people surrounding me and the reality of magic existing was eating away at my composure. It has been for a while...I just didn't realize how small I felt until now.

Not a single mistake is to be made...

"But once again, he was evidently not informed that his presence was required at an official ceremony." The child like man breathed a sigh and shook his head, revealing strips of bright pink in a canvas of ebony.

"You have my sincerest apologies. I assure you, this oversight was in no way intended as a snub." Silver head apologized with a light bow.

"I mean, you must admit, he's not exactly the easiest person to strike up a conversation with." Riddle attempted to justify.

The child like man didn't remain for longer to hear their excuses. "No matter. All who were assigned to House Diasomnia, follow me. I just hope he doesn't sulk about this."

Sulking? My if Draconia is a feared individual with lots of power, these people are jesters. Ways to dig your own grave.

I stood on the podium with my back to the sentient mirror as each 'housewarden' escorted the students out. Kalim waved at me with a smile before leaving. I waved back but didn't return the smile. I felt too nervous to smile.

It didn't help that the sentient glass gave me one last hit to the head before leaving.

I sincerely hope that was it being playful.

Crow man then turned to me, "Well, Maomao. This is a most unfortunate turn of events. I'm afraid that you will not be attending Night Raven Collage after all."

I'm glad, truly.

"Surely you realize that I cannot very well admit a student with no magical ability to my academy."

"It is understandable sir." I hung my head low and bowed. My eyes staring at the floor.

"But worry not. The Dark Mirror will see you safely home. Now, step into the gate, and visualize the place you whence you came." He gestured towards the coffin.

The coffin-? Where did that come from....

I didn't question at and quickly layed myself inside. The lid shutting shutting into place and locking me inside.

Here's to hoping he doesn't bury me alive for looking at him when we first met.

"O Dark Mirror! Return this soul to where it belongs!" He chanted.

Silence followed.

Crow man coughed, "*Ahem* L-let us, er...try this again. O Dark Mirror! Return this soul—"

"There is no such place."

What does that mean?

“What?“

"There is no place in this world where this soul belongs."

"None?"

"None."

I clawed at the padded interior of the coffin, a sudden tightness in my chest.

"How can that be? My, but today is a veritable cavalcade of impossible phenomena!"

"......."

"This has never happended throughout my long tenure. I must confess that I am at something of a loss."

"From what land do you hail?"

Is he asking me?

"Li, Chang'an, red light district." I responded. I was unsure if he even heard me from beyond this coffin. I've surprised myself with how well I'm taking all this. No panic, no sharp breaths or clenched palms...

"I'm afraid I am not familiar with such a place." The coffin lid flew open, to reveal crow man walking past me and towards the door.

"I am intimately acquainted with the origins of every student who has ever come here, and yet... This mysterious homeland of your eludes me." He was stroking his chin deep in thought as I rushed out of the suffocating coffin and followed after him.

"Let us go to the library and look it up, shall we?"

"Yes sir."

Taglist: @kittycat246 @wutap @coffee-or-hot-cocoa @boredselkie @krysthalina @frostines-blog @anastasia-426

[finniestoncrane]

hiiiiii hi hello hi i'm going to start doing some doodling again soon for my western!au (it was so fun deciding on everyone's ancestry and making sure their names fit in!!)

i've been playing red dead redemption 2 for my beloved dork squad, and i've been filled with inspiration but lack the artistic talent so that'll come afterwards and very slowly lmao but for now, here's my ideas for the rogues that i'm hoping to flesh out, maybe into a long fic!! >:3c

hopefully i'll get some more plans for the long list of other characters i want to include, but they're just floating ideas for now kjkjhasd

bruce wayne (batman the dark knight) - scottish/english ancestry. the most boring addition because obviously he's working as an independently wealthy vigilante whose parents were murdered by a lesser known outlaw and he can't get the right help from corrupt government officials, so he's out here working (kind of off the books) as a bounty hunter to clear out the worst of humanity himself. he also doesn't trust the bounty hunters themselves, because he always brings his charges in alive

katherine kyle (catwoman the cat) - surname is of scottish ancestry, given to her father by his former owner. she's the child of a slave owner's daughter and a former slave. highwaywoman, stagecoach thief extraordinaire. somehow manages to get an invite to high end parties as an 'exotic' partner of disgusting, rich men in order to steal as much as she can. she enjoys stealing from rich white people to make up for the treatment her father, a former slave, went through, even after he became a freed man

edward nashton (riddler) - scottish ancestry. crazed inventor and mad scientist who keeps out of the way of society in his laboratory in the hills. his experiments seek to prove that he is far more intelligent than most of his prospective investors give him credit for, and those who mock his work or back out of investment meet a horrid end. he was pushed to madness after being embarrassed in front of the crowds at the 1876 world's fair

jonathan crane (scarecrow) - english ancestry. a former professor at a university in a city on the east coast, he was fired after an unfortunate educational ‘incident’ and moved back to his family farm, long abandoned after his grandmother finally died, to seek a meagre living and the means for revenge

hugh dent (two face) - scottish ancestry. the corrupt sheriff of a small town in the desert. former big city police chief, but was ousted due to his odd sense of law and order and his seemingly random decision-making when it comes to the noose

jervis tetch (mad hatter) - english immigrant with some chinese ancestry. a snake oil salesman who genuinely believes in his powers. some of his tonics have the power to alter minds. specialises in fungus and the use of medicinal herbs in teas, recipes passed down from his mother's side who were from china.

victor friess (mr freeze doctor friess) - german immigrant. town doctor who lost his own wife to consumption. out of nothing but jealousy, he takes the lives of other women to make up for his sense of loss and the unfair luck other men have in having their spouses still with them

poison ivy - native american. travelling herbalist and conservationist. her nation was all but destroyed by the government through war, land theft and false treaties, so she is seeking revenge slowly but surely on former generals, politicians and businessmen

oswald cobb (penguin) - english immigrant. oil tycoon, third generation born in the u.s. who came over with a lot of money and managed to sway government officials. he'll stop at nothing to succeed and continue his control over wealth and power. he still talks with an english accent despite being thoroughly american because he was sent to boarding school and university in england (and because he's a bit of a dick)

john johnson (the joker)  - no known origin. a circus ringmaster and confidence man who runs "the joker's travelling circus". he's a silent serial killer, america's first! he would describe himself as an outlaw for fun, a bandit for laughs, a travelling salesman of chaos

helen quinn (harley quinn harlequin) - french ancestry. she's a travelling sideshow act (contortionist) at the joker’s circus of oddities, and his sidekick and long-suffering romantic interest. she entertains crowds while he commits crimes and she is often charged with sneaking into buildings to rob them

senor dorrance (bane bandito) - mexican immigrant. he works as a strongman with the joker’s travelling circus. he is also often tasked with being joker’s hard man when the clown finds himself in a bit too much trouble. often runs a boxing side event, which is obviously rigged to make money when he throws the fight

basil karlo (clayface) - european ancestry, not entirely known but likely swedish or norwegian. a vaudeville actor who is a little too fond of gambling so has to find other means to claw back his money. very good at deception. now works at the joker's travelling circus after making a few too many enemies at the local theatres

daniel chapel (music meister) - prussian ancestry. in charge of the band at the joker’s travelling circus. he’s often the one sent into town in advance to scope it out and find the rubes. his charm and wit provide him with ample opportunity to part fools with their money

arnold wesker & scarface (ventriloquist) - a ventriloquist and performer with joker’s circus. his puppet often chooses one person from the crowd each night, the ones who don’t laugh, to suffer. hecklers beware

waylon jones (killer croc croc) - no known origin, but speaks with a cajun accent and dialect and is mixed race. his parents abandoned him a as a child in the swamps hoping that he would succumb to the elements or be eaten by animals. he is now a moonshiner in the swamps and prefers to keep away from people given his birth defects. previous associate of the joker's travelling circus, but left as he felt used for shock value more than his skills

roman sionis (black mask)  - italian immigrant. the sadistic owner of several big city factories. his employees suffer at his hands and often go missing, used to satisfy his cruel urges. the factories have been in his family for generations, and he's in the pocket of many officials. he wears a skull mask to separate his two identities during his crimes and has his associates refer to him as black mask during his crimes also

william fugate (clock king) - english ancestry. a simple clock maker on the surface, but he’s a devious loan shark who counts down your payback time to the second and seeks brutal revenge if he’s not paid back on time

deacon blackfire (joseph blackfire) - english ancestry. mad preacher who lives in the hills and has started his own religious cult by luring in the homeless and less fortunate. his goal is to convert the entire u.s. as he believes his word can save them from their sins

floyd lawton (deadshot) - welsh ancestry. notable gunslinger turned outlaw. he makes his money as a hired gun for nefarious and illegal activities and has killed and robbed his way onto the back of many cigarette cards

garfield lynns (firefly) - irish ancestry. explosives expert for hire. he tends to hide himself under a large hat, a bandana and goggles, providing himself with a veil of secrecy to hide the scars he got from the accident which saw him discharged from the army

lazlo valentin (professor pyg) - spanish ancestry. a very strange and isolated pig farmer who is prone to doing experiments on his animals and any unfortunate travellers who happen past his farm

[theverywest]

I'm not sure what the fuck I just watched but me and the bestie had a great time. Some of those jokes were SCANDALOUS and Dan was a great guest, 10/10 great guy.

Highlights of the show below the cut (contains spoilers) which is mainly for my poor memory

- HE ACTUALLY PLAYED HOT TO GO IM A GENIUS

- shane dawson cat joke right out the gate made me want to DIE

- IM HALF WHITE , OTHER HALF ALSO WHITE

- the invisible girlfriend is so sad tom please keep going to therapy

- WHY DID HE LET HIMSELF GET CARRIED BRO (apparently hurt his balls not sure if that was a bit)

INTERMISSIONNN

- DANNNNN he and Tom's dynamic is so funny I cant

- rip invisible girlfriend you'll get to dance soon

- tom and dan going off a "script" is funny as I'd be really interested to see what other guests problem is

- your big , long , huge problem.

- Dan's problem was Phil. Pop off I guess

- Dan having anger issues was not somthing I needed to see but it was funny as

- The SCREAMING of names of people with dan having to insult them all was ICONIC. Some of my favourites: Tubbo, pervert. Quackity, nothing specific I just dont like him. Jack Manifold, bald. Dream, not that bad of a guy. Technoblade, worse upload schedule than me.

That last one had people howling lmao

- BRIGHTON BITER JOKE - "I'm like Tommy's mentor, almost his brother. But nothing like any other tall brown curly haired people he used to be associated with"

- Desecmating Tom's self worth - " how are you so bad at spotting red flags"

- Dan's sex jokes were actually funny hes destroyed my humor wtf

- banger quote from dan when left alone with the invisible girlfriend "I'm a homosexual I dont know how to talk to women!"

- dan going off about how the invisible girlfriend is bad for tom was great

- Tom " hypnotising" dan with the power of the audiences I phone camera lights was comedy GOLD

- dan struggling to lay down and sit due to his old age, brother ur like 30 chill

- dan trying to fight a child in the front row

And that's all I can remeber right now I'm actually so overwhelmed it was so fun! Hope all those who attended had as great a time as I did. Tommyinnit survival tour 2025!

- the invisible girlfriend finally getting a dance

- everyone got a happy ending :D

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Cod Characters General Dating Headcanons (part two)

+ Random and Some bits of Chubby Fem S/O Headcanons with mentions of different nationality S/O

+ What type of BF/GF they would be

Including Valeria Garza, Farah Karim, Kate Laswell, Alex Keller, Gary "Roach" Sanderson, Nikolai Belinski

+ Some Poly! Farah x Reader x Alex Headcanons

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Fem terms and pronouns like she/her are used for the reader

ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ

My rules for requests and characters I can write for

Please comment if you want to be added to the taglist, the next part or cod content alone. I also have content for TLOU and Resident Evil, so please specify.

Taglist: @marshmallowinamess

A/n: Hi lovelies! It's me again Lia, currently working on this one while I haven't even posted the other yet because I wanna post early and I love Valeria. Y'all don't got shit on me, I'm writing this shit while I'm in class AHAHAHA. Btw more Resident Evil content soon...

Disclaimers/warnings: Typical Cod things, OOC characters???, Unrealistic, Some suggestive themes and language, I'm so sorry but English is not my first language so please don't come after me. Most of the content I've seen are on TikTok and Tumblr I don't actually play the game but I love the characters so much, same with any other content I have for other video games.

Tiny sidenote: the reader in this has been describe to be shorter than the characters and has been mentioned to have a soft body rather than the muscular type.

Valeria Garza

ꕥ (Just saying, I'd let her step all over me)

ꕥ The El Sinombre falling in love? No shit she's... semi-normal??

ꕥ Black cat/Doberman girlfriend for sure. She's extremely protective and extremely terrifying when she wants to be. Scary dog privilege if you get it. (Occasionally it's funny to imagine her as a Chihuahua)

ꕥ Dates all kinds of women, body type and other things don't matter to her because she doesn't have a type. If you catch her attention then that's that.

ꕥ Loves spoiling you in everyway possible, just sit pretty for her and she'll take care of everything. Doesn't give a shit on the amount of money she spends on you, you want it? You got it.

ꕥ Loves it when you need her, it's one of the ways she feels loved and appreciated. Would never say it out loud but loves it whenever you show her your appreciation by doing manual labor.

ꕥ The idea of you being her pretty little housewife is sending her to heaven.

ꕥ Spanish pet names galore, culture is something of importance to her so will definitely teach you Spanish if she had the time.

ꕥ Would be interested learning about your culture as well because if you're gonna know about hers then she ought to know what to call you in your language. (Definitely not self-indulgent because I'm Filipina and I know she'd pronounce it somewhat correctly)

ꕥ Doesn't ever let you know about her cartel business. You can never know and she will never allow you to get ever get involved. You're too precious to her and god forbid anything will happen to you, she will destroy the world if she had to.

ꕥ She's more of a masc lesbian, she's the type who likes to be in charge in a "I'm the one who wears the pants in the relationship" way. She's very dominant.

ꕥ Doesn't ever even consider to be submissive, with the amount of shit she's been through. She can be vulnerable with you but in no way, shape or form could you ever top.

ꕥ You're an escape from the life she knew, it was peaceful with you. At first she wasn't used to it, definitely has reoccurring thoughts of something going wrong. You dying, getting kidnapped, falling into the hands of her enemies so constant reassurance.

ꕥ Would absolutely kill for you, no hesitation. The literally definitely of "I would burn this world for you", would absolutely deny it but you know otherwise.

Farah Karim

ꕥ Tabby cat coded girlfriend, she's down to earth and chill. She's that one neutral person everyone adores, she puts her best efforts into a relationship for sure.

ꕥ Has and will help you do your make-up all the time, doesn't matter whether you asked. She'll observe the specific way you do it and do it perfectly.

ꕥ Sweetest girlfriend ever, she has dominance tendencies but it's mainly because she's quite assertive and often makes the decisions. Can't help it, after all her field of work requires her to one up egotistic men.

ꕥ That being said, I think she's had some mild PTSD about how they treated her. Sure it made her tough and she didn't like to be bossed around (unlike angry Mexican man) but I like to think she keeps you out of it as much as possible.

ꕥ Chubby!Reader headcanon is that she literally would adore you, compliment anything and everything. Insecure? Not on her watch, she just makes you feel so loved.

ꕥ Most definitely has introduced you to Price (I feel like he's everyone's father figure except los vaqueros and characters he hasn't interacted with) and don't worry he's already looking after you as well.

ꕥ Poly! Farah x reader x Alex headcanons:

ꕥ You guys following whatever Farah says, towards relationship decisions anyway because you and Alex tend to be indecisive.

ꕥ Lot's of communication between the three of you even if it's just a small thing, consent is always key.

ꕥ Alex following his two wives around a lot, he's mostly behind you guys all the time.

ꕥ Farah is patient when it comes to a lot of things but especially you and Alex.

ꕥ You get head pats from both of them, Farah is in a more praising manner while Alex tends to be in a comforting manner.

ꕥ You cannot tell me these two won't be down to cuddle in any position because I know damn well they would be. More often it's just Alex wanting to be a little spoon.

Alex Keller

ꕥ Golden Retriever boyfriend FOR REAL. This man is the type of man to kneel down and clasp the strap of your shoe or heel when he notices it.

ꕥ You know when you pick up something near a corner of a table or underneath it? He's the type of boyfriend to subconsciously cover the edge or corner of that table so that if your head bumps into it then it wouldn't be as painful or even at all.

ꕥ Having said the first one, he also guides your head whenever getting into a vehicle because god forbid you actually hurt yourself. Not on his watch.

ꕥ Understands why you're insecure and definitely offers a lot of verbal reassurance.

ꕥ Is the type of boyfriend to say "Yes Ma'am" when you ask him to do something, doesn't matter whether it's a small thing or labor intensive. It's kinda become your guys' thing now since people take notice on it.

ꕥ Pouty kind of jealous? Not necessarily whiny but makes this sad upset face at you when jealous instead of something like Ghost or Valeria would do where they'd be glaring the person down jealous.

ꕥ Very thoughtful, he pays attention to what you want and what you need and knows the right timing.

ꕥ Forehead kiss giver, you cannot convince me this man doesn't love doing it. Especially when you're shorter than him, loves resting his chin on top of your head or burying his head in your neck.

ꕥ HATES seeing you uncomfortable, absolutely despises it. That's the last thing he wants you to feel when you're around him. Would understand if there's imminent danger around but it would literally being him back to life if you felt safe enough around him even if there was danger because you're confident in his capabilities to keep you safe.

Kate Laswell

ꕥ (LOVE THIS WOMAN, SHE'S FOR THE GIRLS BECAUSE IT'S CANON. ARGUE WITH THE WALL)

ꕥ She only ever let the TF141 and Nikolai meet you because of course she trusts them enough.

ꕥ They were like "So you're the infamous wife of Laswell huh?"

ꕥ Even before you were married, Kate called you her wife because she was ✨manifesting✨.

ꕥ She loves using it though, sometimes she'd be with coworkers and they'd invited her to go out to pub and drink but she'll refuse saying "Can't, my wife is waiting for me". She'd really rather just spend time with you anyway.

ꕥ Congrats, you made her quit smoking or at least she's trying to. She still does every once and a while when shit gets really bad but never around you because she knows that secondhand smoke is just as bad for you.

ꕥ She doesn't have a type when it comes to people so body is out of the question, if she feels a connection then she feels it.

ꕥ Anything and everything to keep you safe, if something were to happen to you, trust that she'll either get it down herself or if she can't then she'll turn to Price and Belinski for help.

ꕥ As much as possible, she keeps you away from everything. The job she has is just too dangerous and she can't risk you, not when you're one of the only good things in her life that keeps her happy.

ꕥ Definitely a workaholic, something as simple as asking her to eat or rest, maybe take a break. She'll do it, for you and because she knows you care for her.

ꕥ Doesn't half-ass anything, full effort when it comes to you especially when there's a special occasion between you two like holidays, birthdays and anniversaries.

ꕥ Also she loves making you laugh, more often with stories of her experiences with Price and also about how they met.

Gary "Roach" Sanderson

ꕥ (I CANNOT FIND A DECENT GIF OF THIS MAN FOR THE LIFE OF ME... Here's the credits to where I found the photo)

ꕥ Get this man a makeshift antenna, he would adore it. You made it for him because of his call sign.

ꕥ He sometimes wears it on missions but mostly keeps it so that it doesn't get damage because this man is definitely a horder, not in a bad way just anything you give to him is something worth keeping in his eyes.

ꕥ Gary definitely gives you handmade gifts back, when he knows you'll like something or even if it's at a random, he loves making them for you and he cried when he found out you kept those all in it's own box labeling it your treasures.

ꕥ Very shy and reluctant at first but once he's comfortable, he is tackling you for a hug when he gets the chance.

ꕥ Doesn't talk a lot, (it took me to Google when I saw that many people hc him communicating through BSL) but I like to think he does talk. It's just really selective, like a few words.

ꕥ The first time you heard his voice, you looked at him like "???". He looked at you confused at your reaction and he only realized it when you told him.

ꕥ Think that he'll try to learn sign language within your mother tongue you know, it's too cute not to think about.

ꕥ He gives off soft lover vibes, definitely far more on the gentle side compared to his comrades.

ꕥ Something in me tells me this man rambles but only and I mean only when he's already extremely comfortable around you, not used to using his voice much so expect a bit of stutter. Which by the way, he does this without knowing he's rambling and will profusely apologize with his tone of voice slowly getting more quiet. (This is your sign, comfort this man)

ꕥ Likes to crawl around and climb things for fun, another one of the reasons his call sign was formed. The first time Ghost genuinely screamed was when Roach was stuck on the side of the wall and Ghost saw him there. Kinda like when you see a roach climbing up a wall and it flies straight for you in your direction. (Happened to me by experience when I was taking a shower)

ꕥ He also likes crawling around, like this I mean. Hacker!Reader seeing this on the enemy's security camera while she tries to shut them off is just funny to me idk why.

ꕥ Chubby!Reader? Sign him the fuck up. You once sat down near him and he saw how you thought spread a bit and it was so close to his that he was just resisting the urge to touch. The voice in his head shamelessly thinking of what it would be like if you suffocated him with them.

ꕥ He loves peppering kisses, doesn't matter whether it's receiving or giving this man would straight up take your hands and use them to cup his face, his hands still being over yours and would with wait for you to kiss him or kiss you himself.

Nikolai Belinski

ꕥ (I have no clue how to write for nik but I'll try my best)

ꕥ We all know him and his jokes about his "wives" which by the way is not true and you know it.

ꕥ He's husband material however he is quite busy, not that he'd barely spend time with you but he is away a lot. There's an upside to this, he constantly calls you (Let's be real, he prefers calls over texts) just to check on how you're doing and he tells you when he's going to come home.

ꕥ Despite all his jokes, he'd never actually make fun of you. Sure he's sarcastic and talks to himself a lot but he'd never go as low as actually making an offensive joke to his lover.

ꕥ Speaking of joking, your laugh is music to this man's ears. Don't matter if you sound like a dying cat, he's still gonna make you laugh.

ꕥ Surprisingly really sweet, people are often surprised to see that man with a lover. He's very thoughtful in a sense that he's observant, sure he's quite absentminded when around you because that's the only space he's comfortable enough to do so but also because he likes listening to you.

ꕥ Does every safety measure in a helicopter possible if he knew you or Gaz would be in that helicopter, he also makes improvements to it and calls it Gaz-proofing because we all know how Garrick fell off a damn helicopter TWICE. (Idk how he does it, Gaz has some serious plot armor)

[yolowritter]

I actually meant to ask about the one where Lila gets the Ladybug Miraculous, I wanted to save the serial killer for tomorrow... And I added a "future" for some reason, causing confusion.

Well then, I'll ask about the Lilabug & Marinette AU now.

Oh sorry, sorry! I thought you asked abt the serial killer Au! My bad! So, the Lilabug Au! Basically it's what it says on the tin! Lila arrives in Paris early, and Fu comes across her while searching for compatible Miraculous Holders. The reason why he senses her is because Lila would be an excellent Fox, but Fu can't tell specifically which Miraculous she has affinity with. So he pulls his scheme with Truck-Kun, and Lila saves his life. Because you know, there's people recording the damn incident and she wants fame!

Also, Lila is extremely (read: canon levels) cynical in this Au, and generally abhorbs being around other human beings. Sure, she'll play the happy-go-lucky new girl from Italy and smile sweetly at people all day, but she secretly hates every second of it. Anyway, Lila will later find a pair of magic earrings in her bag because she wanted to go viral. Is this Fu Bashing for picking that testing method out of every option? Sure. Will I salt the man? Nah, we have yuri to write!

Anyway, the rest of Origins goes normally, except Lila is also there, sweet-talking her way into sitting at the back of the class and away from all these weirdos. This will be important later. Anyway, Chloe bla blas about Adrien, gum on the seat, etc. Then Stoneheart happens, which also paints a big target on Marinette's back as the local goody-two-shoes! Lila doesn't plan to bully her though, no no. Being her friend is the better option, because she doesn't think Marinette will have the spine to accuse her of lying then. Totally not for the free bakery sweets!

Anyway, Stoneheart! Paris' resident furry is right on cue, and Lila gets an unwanted moral compass in the form of adorable Eldritch Deity! Tikki absolutely hates her btw, since Lila doesn't create anything of her own except lies. Still, they have a city to save and once our beloved Kwami pulls out the "people will love you if you save them" card, Lila's sold! Say less, she's already suiting up!

I'm giving her a more stylish outfit too, think black boots and gloves, as well as actual linings to separate different parts of the suit with some inverted coloring on the sides. Because Lila Rossi is nothing if not fashionable! Anyway, a cat boy falls out of the sky while she's learning how to rip off Spider-Man! One introduction later, Lila sticks with the name Ladybug because why the hell not? She'd have gone with the Italian word, but that's a dead giveaway. Generic means less clues to her identity.

Now, she puts on a great show for the cameras! If Chat hadn't heard her mutter insults about everyone not running for their lives, he'd be impressed! Alya gets saved from that overdramatic car flip, Ladyblog becomes a thing later, and Stoneheart gets absolutely destroyed because Lila is just as smart as Marinette! A bit more straightforward and "I'm going to rip you yo pieces with a spoon if need be"...but very intelligent! Chloe gets saved, Lila feels the urge to psychologically damage her someday soon, and she and Chat find a second to talk after the whole "as long as we're here Hawkmoth can't get you" speech.

Reminder that Adrien has been surrounded by actors and performers his whole life, so he sniffs out Lila's true intentions instantly. Still, she isn't immediately hostile to him. They talk, and decide that since they're the superheroes now, and Paris needs saving from a mentally ill mothman with a midlife crisis, they'll work together. Chat warns her that he won't let her abuse her Miraculous' powers, and Lila promises she isn't going to. Ladybug's reputation as this city's only hope needs to remean clean, after all!

The rest of Origins happens the same, umbrella scene included, and Fu is very proud of himself for making such good choices! Lila also decides to befriend Alya because a blog dedicated to Ladybug is 1) a great publicity stunt she will gladly abuse, and 2) this idiot needs to be kept in check, lest Alya accidentally connects the dots some day. Therefore, we now have the Core 5, consisting of Marinette (reluctant friends with Lila), Adrien (empathetic to the other new kids and thinking her confidence is cool), Nino (music provider), Alya (unhinged conspiracy theorist), and Lila (local lying machine). What a wonderful group of dumbasses! I'm sure everything will be fine!

Most of Season 1 stays the same, with Chat and Ladybug coming to an understanding that the other isn't actually so bad, and Lila secretly liking his stupid puns. No romance for obvious reasons, but Chat is why she slowly starts to open up a bit more in her civilian life. Lila still doesn't care about these people, but Chloe annoys her and Marinette is useful either as a distraction or a help when it comes to getting back at the Queen B. Plus Alya's incresingly ridiculous theories are generating so much popularity for Ladybug that the least Lila can do is listen to the yapping once in a while. She'd still kick them off a cliff just to "save" them for clicks, but her "friends" are at least not on the target list.

Actually, Lila doesn't really try to maliciously manipulate almost anyone here, because she's taken a different approach. The people in her class inexicably seem to have connections with famous artists, chiefs and whatnot, so keeping up the innocent facade is working better for Lila than herding them around like sheep! At this rate, one of these drains on her social battery might prove to be Jagged Stone's secret love child or something! She wants to be in people's good graces!

Due to all of this, her lies are kept relatively minimal and somewhat provable. Besides, most of her deception skills are busy keeping both Ladybug's identity a secret, and the heroic, dauntless persona up for the cameras. Many Akuma are roundhouse-kicked, uppercutted, and defenestrated, but Paris still loves Ladybug (and Chat Noir)! Surprisingly, Lila is actually willing to give him credit where it's due, since she thinks he operates similar to her, with how Adrien poses for the cameras and shoots out witty puns. Just that Chat has a Morality Stick somewhere behind his tail.

Things stay relatively the same until Evillustrator, where Lila's lack of understanding about so-called "normal people" puts her in a Situation. Chloe still exposes Nath's drawings of Marinette, and Lila cannot for the life of her understand the concept of a crush. Physical attraction, she gets. Attraction to someone's status or wealth? Of course! Heck, the free things Adrien usually treats their friend group over are half the reason she's nice to him! Social obligations regarding politeness? Completely comprehendable. But a crush? It just doesn't compute.

An Akuma gets yeeted out of Gabriel's attic, Nathaniel gets butterflied, yada yada. When Ladybug goes to check on Chloe however...the blonde is overjoyed to have her idol visiting her! Lila takes this opportunity to shake some rust off her insults for a bit, and spends the entire time "recipricating" the excitment, with backhanded compliments to boot. Chloe...feels very weird about the experience afterwards, and doesn't understand why. Lila is very proud of herself, and gets yelled at by Tikki later.

Meanwhile, Marinette is actually there when Sabrina shows up and they begin doing the project thing together. Until Evillustrator shows up. Sabrina is terrified, but Marinette's like "Oh, you want to go on a date with me? Yeah sure, let me just change into a better outfit." Nathaniel is overjoyed, and Marinette takes that time to actually wear something nice, and also tell Sabrina to get the heroes ASAP! To her credit, she does so very quickly, and totes not because Chat Noir was looking for Marinette specifically.

Anyway, the boat ride is still the same. Marinette actually notices Hawkmoth hurting Nathaniel, deducing it might be possible to get him to reject the Akumatization somehow, and keeps him busy with a surprisingly enjoyable evening, all things considered. Chat calls in Ladybug, who tells him to stealth after them and wait until she gets there, dumps Chloe, and heads over there. Lila yoyos Nathaniel's sketchbook away, tossing it into he river, trips him and breaks the pen, undoing the damage, etc. It's important to note that since Sabrina was already there with Marinette before, Adrien didn't get to do his "cool introduction" as Chat.

Anyway, Marinette tells them what she noticed about the Akumatizations, and Lila keeps it in mind. After all, if there's one person in Paris who can psychoanalyze people so badly their mental health would improve, it's Lila Rossi! Ladybug dips to go recharge, and Chat starts fawning over how amazing Marinette was. To the girl in question. Adrien is a dork and I love him for it.

He also rants about Marinette to Ladybug, and Lila makes up her mind to pay her a visit as Paris' friendly neighbourhood superheroine. For now, Chat gives her a ride home, and the next day, Adrien has miraculously "heard about" what happened last night. This tips Lila off to his identity, but she decides to figure it out later. Surprisingly, Nathaniel is sitting in the back with her today, and Lila takes that chance to try and understand yesterday's debacle.

They strike up some conversation, and Lila slowly thinks about what Nathaniel is saying. She doesn't feel any of the things he describes to her, but she kind of gets it, if as a abstract concept. Now, Lila still doesn't really care about people, but decides to keep talking to Nathaniel since abruptly going quiet after asking so many pointed questions would be weird. The result? He ends their chat by exclaiming that he's not sure why she's being nice to him, but that's it's nice to have a friend. Lila is so stunned by the idea of friendship, she doesn't manage to correct him in time. She officially has her first friend, and no idea what to do about it. Tikki is laughing at her misery.

A lot more things happen in this Au, like the Collector tipping Lila off regarding Gabriel (which she doesn't share with Chat since he might be Adrien, and while his reaction would be telling, it's too much of a risk), and meeting Fu for the first time since Tikki doesn't get sick in Princess Frangrace here. Needless to say, Lila is very tempted to steal that box full of magical jewels! She behaves, but does slowly begin to loan them out through Season 2. Marinette gets the fox on Sapotis, because Lila would sooner reveal her identity to Hawkmoth than trust Alya of all people to be a responsible superhero.

She and Marinette have been bonding a bit (over their mutual dislike of Gabriel), and Lila is slowly learning how to make friends as herself, while resisting the urge to slingshot stupid civilians off a building with her yoyo. She specifically hates Mr Ramier for getting Akumatized so many times, and repeatedly calls Hawkmoth a tasteless, unoriginal failure of a villain. Gabriel takes extreme offense to this.

Anyway, I'm going to stop here for now because I've been typing for a bit too long. You or anyone else is free to send me questions any time, and thanks a bunch for the ask martiya! Marinette is getting her superhero romance with this one, and ends up being the only person aside from Chat that Lila feels safe to be bitchy and snarky with as Ladybug. Ahh, toxic yuri my beloved! Marinette can totally fix her btw.

[mirrorball-leclerc]

snow angel - track two

series masterlist // previous // next

2 YEARS AGO

i'll fucking fight him. i swear it.

no honey, you don't have to.

i saw this coming.

how on earth could you see this coming?

he was distant.

i've told him i loved him for days and he always responded me "me too" or worse he said nothing back

oh sweetie

how did you put up with that? you deserve so much better.

it's okay. i'm moving out of our apartment tonight. ryan said i can stay with him for a few weeks.

i love him lily. i don’t know when those feelings will go away. i hope they go away soon. i can’t keep loving someone who hurt me this bad.

i promise you i’ll fight him when i see him in bahrain next season.

i hope he dnfs

i hope you write a fucking day destroying album because of this. he will never know peace

oh lily, i'm going to ruin his fucking life with whatever i come with.

lily muni he removed lando norris

lily muni he fuck that guy

charles leclerc i do not understand what happened? george russell you're telling me the chronically online guy doesn't know what just happened? alex albon the grid's #1 gossip girl doesn't know what happened? charles leclerc NO I DON'T KNOW THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING CONNARDS!

pierre gasly lando cheated on rhea

max verstappen i can crash into him in bahrain next season?

yuki tsunoda i will bite his ankles. lily muni he i'll poison his food yuki tsunoda we will not go that far. food is sacred.

esteban ocon does this mean that **** can finally **** ***?

lance stroll how about you shut the fuck up esteban? max verstappen what the fuck are you two going on about now? lance stroll ignore esteban. he's a bit delirious.

daniel ricciardo i promise to make his life miserable next year.

rhea reynolds i'm just pissed that he was too much of a coward to end our relationship before he went on to publicly cheat on me.

rhea reynolds at least try to not get caught.

charles leclerc what is it the kids say? he fumbled?

lance stroll please never use that phrase again

pierre gasly she's probably crying to taylor swift now

rhea reynolds LET ME BE PEAR GASLY! daniel ricciardo yeah, pierre let the girl be emotional! rhea reynolds if i'm crying to all too well that's nobody's business but mine

charles leclerc you can come to bahrain with me!

max verstappen or me! daniel ricciardo you're both thinking too small. show up with me. can't promise i'll have a good race or win but it'll show him!

rhea reynolds thanks guys but i'm not really up to going to races anytime soon.

lily muni he never let a man take anything from you. GO TO THE RACE!

rhea reynolds nah, not really up for it right now but i could change my mind in a few months. it's literally december!

charles leclerc i will save a spot for you regardless.

yukitsunoda it's okay, i can bite his ankles if he comes near you.

rhea reynolds i appreciate the sentiment yuki

rhea reynolds besides, i'll never date another fucking driver again.

rheareynolds posted new stories

nothing better than taylor swift to help with heartbreak who needs men when cats are much better company?

liked by lilymhe, charles_leclerc, mickschumacher and others

rheareynolds home for the holidays update: i adopted a cat, i got cheated on (i should stick to dating women), and goats hate ryan. p.s. the first picture is what i sent to max when he made fun of me for getting cheated on.

tagged: vancityreynolds

view all comments

maxverstappen33 THAT’S NOT TRUE AND YOU KNOW IT!

↳ rheareynolds you told me and i quote, “that’s what you get for dating a guy who looks like a walking orange.”

↳ maxverstappen33 i called him ernie and then a walking orange. get it right.

lilymhe my offer still stands

↳ yukitsunoda0511 mine too! i can bite ankles!

↳ rheareynolds thanks guys but i'd rather not have to bail you out of jail for assault.

user01 so did they break up? or what? the chismosa in me needs to know

user02 it's okay rhea, he didn't deserve you

user03 fuck men, am i right?

comment liked by rheareynolds

vancityreynolds you're lying to everyone blake made those cinnamon rolls, not you.

↳ rheareynolds must you ruin everything?

↳ vancityreynolds it's my job as your older brother.

georgerussell63 why get an orange cat when he's a walking orange?

↳ alex_albon because rhea is the embodiment of an orange cat

↳ rheareynolds it's true. i've been told many times

user04 love to see that loser's friends are on her side. how are you going to publicly cheat on your girlfriend?

↳ user05 but did he cheat? what if they were broken up?

↳ user06 either you can't read (no offense) or you didn't read the caption, she literally says, "i got cheated on" they were very much together. stop trying to invalidate her pain because you love l*ndo

user07 it's okay baby, you can date me instead

↳ rheareynolds thanks for the offer babes but i should stick to being single for a while ❤️

↳ user07 i'm screaming!

user08 rhea's better than me fr. i would've destroyed his car carrie underwood style.

maxfretwell going to miss your cookies. that's the worst part about all of this

↳ rheareynolds yeah cause fuck my heartbreak right?

↳ maxfretwell that's not what i meant and you know it!

↳ rheareynolds can't wait to see the gossip pages say max fretwell says rhea reynolds' heartbreak is not validated

↳ maxfretwell i take it all back this is why he cheated on you

↳ rheareynolds TOO SOON FRETWELL!

↳ user09 curse n*rris for taking this duo away from us!

taglist: @emilyval @ihateyougunthersteiner @lesliiieeeee @firetruckstuckley @cashtons-wife @landonorizzz @yoremins

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CLICK HERE TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST

¡leclerc-s speaks! i was listening to say don't go while write the first half of this. hence, the reference to the song.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[yuri-is-online]

Host With the Most (Vil Schoenheit x Yuu)

Intro

notes: they/them used for Yuu, in this house we love Vil Schoenheit and his pursuit of aesthetic beauty, Vil is very touchy with Yuu because he likes them, Yuu is a wee bit oblivious. Also happy New Year! Ha this took me too long to write. If you wish to see more of me, consider looking at my masterlist.

"As the default 'owner' of the Mansion it makes the most sense for Yuu to help me." Vil's voice has that firm air of finality to it that thunders through the air with the same force as Leona's roar or Malleus's storms. Speaking of Leona, he seems to be frightfully amused by this cute little attempt at imitation, and you have absolutely no desire to see them cat fight.

"Just what help do you need exactly? I'm not really the best choice for an understudy." You try your best to keep any trace of tiredness out of your voice, but you really should know better than to lie to Vil by now. He ignores his argument and cups your face in his hands to get a better look at your skin, pursing his lips ever so slightly to try and avoid a full frown.

"You really need to have more faith in yourself." The scolding is serious but the genuine affection in his gaze as you involuntarily chase his touch as he takes back his hands is real. "And to get more sleep. With enough practice you could be more than worthy, but lucky for us both that's not what I had in mind."

"Awww beta fish already claimed little shrimpy? Laaame." Floyd blows a raspberry and you stick out your tongue when Vil looks away.

"No chasing shromps for you." That cheers him up. You think.

"Stay!" Crewel seems to have regained a bit of his fire. "Ramshackle is Yuu's home, so having them work alongside Schoenheit will allow them to keep an eye on all you puppies and make sure you aren't destroying their living space."

"You have no need to worry yourself over such a thing Professor." Rook cheerfully says.

"Yeah! We're good house guests." Laughs Ortho.

"... Schoenheit perhaps you would like to take Yuu to look over costumes and explain your plans while I have some words with my third and fourteenth reasons?" Vil does not need Crewel to tell him twice.

~~~~

"We aren't planning on using any rooms you or Grim do regularly, though Rook and Floyd did have ideas for the attic." Vil immediately starts talking shop as soon as you leave the classroom. "Guests are going to walk though the house on a marked tour, and I'll be playing host for part of the show."

"A ghost host?" You expect to be reprimanded but Vil winks.

"In my first script the host had an assistant, but Ortho suggested he be placed in charge of screen mapping and projection so we didn't need to make as many adjustments to your dorm." Vil sounds just as proud of Ortho as Idia would be if he was telling the story. It fills your heart with warmth. "Thanks to that suggestion I get to have you stick with me for the rest of the week." And just like that the warmth floods up to your ears, damn that professional training for letting Vil say... things. Yes just things, you are reading into friendly banter too much. The way your breath hitches at the gentle ghost of his touch across your back as he guides you through the door he opens is natural, you just aren't used to Vil's touchiness yet.

"Have you already thought out the costumes?" You remove yourself from his side and try to place some distance between yourself and your feelings by looking over the fist set of clothes Crewel has laid out in this empty classroom, completely missing the brief flicker of disappointment Vil refuses to contain.

"I provided Professor Crewel some concept sketches and my script, but we still have some sizing adjustments to make..." Vil's voice trails off and you turn back in concern. Yet he does not seem distracted at all when you do, he simply proceeds with his thoughts evenly. "I hope you don't mind, but the costume I have in mind for you is raven themed, so you might end up looking a bit like our dear Headmage."

"Oh please no." You groan and Vil laughs.

"Just the bit." He moves to your side, directing your attention towards an admittedly sleek tunic like outfit with a hood and feathers embroidered down the cape. "Go ahead and try it on, I'll wait out here to look it over." As you turn to do just that you find his face close to yours, the typical intensity of his stares and danger of this specific smile suggesting something other than his usual ire. "And make sure to tell me if it's comfortable," he gently tips your chin up to look at him with a slender finger, it's as if he means to kiss you with how he tilts his head "you will be standing next to me for the whole night, I can't have my partner falling down from something as simple as fatigue."

Oh there is no need to worry over that when he is more than able to be the death of you on his own.

~~~~

The better part of your next three weeks is spent practicing the haunt and slowly loosing your sanity. You don't actually have any lines, or much of anything to do other than follow Vil around really, but that meant you had to spend more time around him. More time around those casual touches and compliments that have invaded your friendship since your trip to the underworld, battering your imagination in directions you had long since tried to convince yourself was forbidden. Vil is beautiful, and his confidence of it strangely not off putting to your foolish heart. But Vil had been clear, he was affectionate to all of his friends in private and no amount of skirting the boundary-

though it was all him, if you could only realize how he is trying so desperately to initiate that he is starting to come unglued

-would make your desire for his love anything less than a pipe dream. A dream made substantially worse by how you did know just enough about what one of his kisses would feel like to fantasize about tasting him on your lips. Not that you could see them from your position at the back of the test group, clammy hands fidgeting with the prop lantern you carry, but his slicked back hair and strategically rumpled suit are so ingrained in your dreams at this point you're sure you know what he looks like.

As if you are the only one tortured by fantasies, as if he did not design that cape specifically to see you in it. As if-

"Horntoads and lizards, fiddle and strum. Please answer the role by beating a drum!" Cater's head begins to "levitate" up off the table as he chants in a show of theatrics that's still impressive even if this is the 999th time you've seen it; Ortho's projection mapping coupled with Cater's willingness to improvise had blended into a really unique act. Something a Scarabia freshmen seems to really agree with you because he immediately starts screaming and flailing around in a way that has you deeply concerned for your poor dorm's safety. You take a deep breath to steady yourself, trying to examine the idiot's body language to determine if he was a threat or not. A decision that's made for you as soon as he goes for his magic pen and you note, perhaps too late, that maybe you should make your guests surrender them before going through the haunt.

"Excuse me." You make sure your cowl is lowered as you gently try to tug his hand away from his pocket and are rewarded with an easily dodged slap. "Well now you're just embarrassing both of us."

"Just what do you think it is you are doing foolish mortal." You swear you saw Vil walk forward, but your brain refuses to register his movements as soon as he opens his voice. "It seems you would prefer to take my way out after all." It's silly, being impressed with a professional actor staying in character, but then it must be equally silly to go a bit jelly legged at seeing Vil drawn up to his full height and radiating confidence. The student whimpers and you again reach for his hand, acting the good spirit gently tugging him away from the grip of the damned souls of the mansion.

"C'mon now, no need to be shy." The student lets you lead him away mutely, clearly disappointed in himself.

~~~~

"And I will see you all a little later." Vil bows, disappearing from the group as they flow into the dancers and he immediately drops his practiced face and begins making his way to his next scene. He has faith in you, so he is not surprised to see you waiting, cowl once again up and swinging your lantern to amuse yourself in a manner that would be cute if he wasn't so worried. "Yuu," Vil does not love how forceful his tone is for the way it makes you jump but the emotions running about in his chest keep him from softening it "are you alright?"

"Just peachy." You try a chipper tone but choke as Vil once again reaches to touch you. He cups your face in his hands like it is precious, examines it careful and runs his perfect fingers along your arms to examine your hands in what feels dangerously close to an excuse to hold them. "Dumbass," he purses his lips "sorry, po-ta-to thought Cater had actually lost his head because of Riddle or something. I made sure to hand him over to Crewel and suggested we take the guest's magic pens to make sure if they do freak out no spells get fired off."

"In hindsight that seems like a rather obvious precaution." Vil exhales, letting out the disappointment and intakes a prideful, teasing look to his eyes as he continues to focus on you. You swallow thickly, how many times has he said what he's about to in these past few weeks? "You're doing an excellent job, I knew I picked the right person to partner with." You look down at your hands, Vil still hasn't let them go. It hurts somewhat, more than nearly being slapped.

"You don't have to say things like that just to make me feel better." You cough and Vil frowns.

"I don't give compliments for the sake of ego you know." He lets go of one of your hand to run his thumb over your quivering lip, staring deeply at the tears you had not noticed until he moves to dry them as if he can erase them from time with sheer will alone. "When I say something to you about how grateful I am to have met you, that I admire you, when I say I find things about you to be beautiful and that I want you to stand beside me, I mean every word."

"If you say things like that I'm going to start thinking you mean something different when you call me your partner." You try to joke and for some reason this is what makes him falter.

"... wasn't that obvious?" Vil, beautiful Vil, has a genuinely surprised look on his face. As if he was not the one who had said he was affectionate to his friends specifically... as if he had expected you to notice how much longer he spent kissing you than Rook or Epel and divine his romantic intent from the way his hand sought yours alone. Perhaps he had thought you had more courage than you did, or perhaps, you think to yourself with some relief, there are some things Vil just doesn't quite know how to say because he is so used to having to prove himself worthy of saying them in the first place.

"Are you sure you want this?" You ask because you feel like you have to, but what you are really trying to ask is if you are allowed to want this, to want him.

"Dangerously so." He rests his forehead against yours, a contented sigh worming its way past his lips at the lack of ambiguity in the way your fingers finally thread through his. "I only have so much time left to keep you to myself you know? When the school year ends I'll have to make excuses to more than just a handful of classmates for why I deserve to be alone with you, without sparking any comments." You had considered that of course, let it fuel your doubts and even still now it flickers slightly in your mind.

"I don't want to take the coward's way out." You say and Vil's eyes betray momentary shock. "I don't want to keep ignoring my feelings."

"Then we are in agreement, my dearest partner." Vil draws you impossibly close and presses one kiss to your forehead to his joy and your rancor before he dips you to give the kiss you really want. "I don't think I could ignore you if I tried."

Welcome, foolish mortals, to this haunted taglist: @nothingfuninthislife

[yarrowleef]

once again thinking about my various pepe-sylvia-red-string-board StarClan theories trying to come up with a canon compliant way to interpret them.

I'm getting on this because StormClan's Folly is going to come out soon, and i'm sure it will imply StarClan """sent""" that storm as punishment for their transgressions (the same way they """"sent"""" one in "The Raging Storm." and when this inevitably happens I WILL be calling their bluff again.)

Look, all i'm saying is every time we have seen a starclan POV they are never controlling things on that scale. they are usually sitting around fretfully looking at visions.

anyway, recently I came across this passage in yellowfang's secret's prologue that i've been thinking about because....what the hell is this.

So....Here we have StarClan cats. fearing divine punishment on behalf of the clans.....

punishment from who?????

not from StarClan, apparently! not with how it's phrased here! This is not a threat that StarClan is making, it's a warning they're trying to decipher. It's coming from somewhere else, and it's not some other spirit in starclan or else Molepelt and Hollowbelly would be able to ask them. These dipshits don't know anything about it.

maybe I shouldn't say that StarClan cats are lying per se when they let the clans believe that all disasters are punishments. i think StarClan also believes it, that the world is controlled by some predetermined force of fate and everything that happens must happen for a reason. a reason that will ultimately favor them in the end so long as they follow The Rules.

it's just insane how this supposed great inevitable punishment for driving out SkyClan took ages and ages to happen, and it's been insinuated that everything from Brokenstar to Tigerstar to the dark forest to the twolegs destroying the territory (which they were already doing, hence what caused SkyClan to leave in the first place??) to Darktail to the stupid storm that ended that arc ties back to this one crime. Every bad thing that happened in a decade+ time span is blamed on this long-time-coming punishment over there not being the divinely mandated 5 clans. It took a long time for the self-fulfilling paranoia to justify itself, but I guess they technically got there eventually! fascinating.

if the reason doesn't make sense, StarClan will invent an interpretation and pass it on to the medicine cat as truth. It's not like, a choice in the typical sense, it's a religious belief. 

Let me clarify that I am not advocating that a god or god equivalent exists in this world. I hope desperately that they never try to have real deities, it would suck so bad. If Erin Hunter ever introduces the god of the stars as some fuck ass discount-bargain-bin Aslan Lion who appears in ProtaginistPelt's dream one night like "be not afraid, it is I, Starmane, god of all prophecy and creator of StarClan" rest assured I will be VERY UPSET.

 dont get me wrong, I like pantheons and fictional deities as much as the next guy, I even like them in wc fanfic! but as far as canon warrior cats goes, it is too late to introduce gods in this world and i'm confident they would make it worse.

I'm just saying that StarClan acts as if there is one, and that they must answer to it Or Else. not in the form of a being, but at least in the form of some divine ineffable will. StarClan is a lot easier to make sense of when you stop viewing them like gods, and start viewing them as worshippers of their own religion. i cant view them as a separate being from the clans, they ARE the clans. they interpret the world the same as when they were alive. i wish I could find more starclan-villain fanfics that approached them like that (more paranoid then in control) rather than as a powerful outside oppressive force (aka framing them as something akin to like...old testament Christian god. i get it, it's cathartic! it's fine, but I don't think it always works in this setting, at least not in an exact 1-to-1 way.)

StarClans actions make no sense because they also don't know why things need to happen a certain way. They are just higher ranking messengers passing on interpretations of what they see, fully believing they need to follow the will of "fate" the same way the clans believe they need to follow StarClan. And tbh I like this interpretation of the world. i LIKE the idea of StarClan trying to make divine sense out of bullshit. It's the only way to make sense of their pointlessly cryptic actions.

this is why trying to introduce deities would be a bad idea. Because you just can't put a conscious "wisdom" behind when they claim they can and cannot meddle with the living world's politics. Sometimes they can reject a chosen leader, sometimes they apparently have no choice but to let tyrants do what they want unchallenged, sometimes they send passive aggressive omens, sometimes they yell at you directly in your dreams or straight up appear in the living world, sometimes (like last arc) they opt for complete radio silence for moons and moons for no reason!

why does starclan choose to intervene here and not there? because they aren't choosing. they are waiting for something they could interpret as permission. When StarClan feels that Fate(tm) is bidding them to directly intervene with the living is as inconsistent and irrational as say....random violent weather patterns.

[bumblebeehug]

Together Forever

Summary: Natsu and Lucy being consent in each other's presence, and a little bit of Happy being a sweet baby boy. Notes: This is the first fanfic I've written and posted, and since I don't wanna re-read and edit stuff I'm just gonna close my eyes and hit publish :P Ao3 - FF.net

***

“Come on Natsu, at least steer your vomit away from me!” Lucy cried out, watching the sick dragonslayer destroy yet another pair of shoes. She was seriously considering putting plastic bags on her feet if Natsu couldn’t gain control over his flow anytime soon.

“Luuushi...” Happy said with a groggy voice, barely keeping his eyes open. The exceed had used up almost all his magic powers this mission, making him unusually tired - and unexpectedly cuddly towards a certain celestial mage.

“Come here Happy.” Lucy patted on her lap, letting the blue cat curl up into a purring ball of blue fur. The low frequent rumbling actually helped her calm down too. She would just have to deal with his shedding and the dirty shoes later - it’s not as if she could do anything now anyways.

Natsu himself was laying on the bench opposite to his best friends, watching them regain lost energy and magical power from the exhausting mission. It was sweet watching them both being calm like this. Of course he truly didn’t mind their friendly bickering. Happy felt comfortable enough with Lucy to show all sides of him to her, both the emotional and the snarky part. He remembered how loud and reductant Lucy was in the past, with her big and crazy reactions to almost everything that happened. Shouting every time Gray stripped or kicking Natsu out of her apartment. She never wavered. Once again, he didn’t actually mind that part, in fact, he really liked it. She had courage to be herself no matter who she was encountering, and her cute reactions often made the enemies favour her. However, she had gotten a lot calmer and sweeter the last two years. It must be that thing they call growing up, huh?

While in the middle of his thoughts, the train started moving extra much, making the salmon haired boy hurl up a mix of whatever he had eaten before boarding the hell-transportation. He really hoped Wendy could learn a new anti motion sickness-spell soon - life hadn’t been too kind since that Troia spell stopped working on him.

***

“Finally!” Natsu kissed the ground in delight of finally leaving the train, being back in their hometown. Lucy ignored him, as usual, and took care of their baggage. After all the years she had known him, he was still just as embarrassing to be out in public with. How hadn’t he picked up on social cues yet? Happy was still asleep in her arms, so after struggling for a bit she finally kicked some sense in Natsu, somehow without waking the cat.

“Come on and help with the bags you moron!” She scolded quietly, not wanting to disturb the sweet little animal who conveniently used her left boob as a pillow. “You don’t want to wake Happy, right? He deserves some rest, you know.”

Natsu obliged to the blonde’s orders. She was helping him nurse Happy back to full health after all. Grabbing the baggage, they soon headed back to Lucy’s apartment. The sun had started setting and he really craved that soft bed of hers.

Shortly after Lucy had met Natsu, she noticed an odd behaviour with him. Usually when walking back from missions with the entire Team Natsu, the air was filled with discussions. Natsu and Gray bickering in the background, Erza talking strategies with Lucy and Wendy, Happy and Carla talking about fishes or something, and then the occasional bickering between Lucy and Happy. When it was only Natsu, Lucy and Happy though, it was as if a switch had flipped. They rarely spoke, only leaving the sounds of Happy’s purring and Natsu and Lucy’s footsteps in the air. It was never uncomfortable though. They already knew what the other thought, and even if they didn’t know, they never felt the need to rush any conversations. This happened more and more frequently after the Alvarez Empire war, when Natsu had said those words to her. “We’ll be together forever, right?” Not any huge words, not anything complicated - just, the truth. Why would they need to talk all the time when they had forever in front of them. Everything would come in time. Lucy had decided to believe that.

“Hey, Lucy…”

… Did she jinx herself?

“Can we stay at your place? And can you make us some food, pleaaaase?”

Nevermind.

“Whatever, you guys just do what you want anyways.”

***

When they stepped into the apartment Lucy immediately went into the bedroom, carefully dropping off the knocked out exceed on the foot of the bed.

“I’m taking a quick shower, get the meat out of the freezer and defrost it while I’m gone, will you?” Lucy didn’t bother doing that stuff herself - Natsu knew her kitchen almost better than she did, he could figure it out.

Once she was in the shower she finally relaxed. A bath would undeniably be better, but right now she was more focused on getting all the dirt off her body. The mission they had gone on was fairly easy for Lucy and Natsu - the only one who had a hard time was Happy. The bandits had some type of flying ability, and the only way to defeat them was to get close. Therefore, Happy had to switch between them while they regenerated their powers. Lucy had gotten a bit worried when she saw Happy’s fur getting wet from sweat, but the exceed had just shaken her off, staying strong to the end of the mission. Lucy couldn’t help but admire him. If only Carla saw these heroic moments, maybe they would have gotten further in their relationship by now.

That reminded her of how protective Natsu could be. He hated it when Carla was rude to Happy. He didn’t show it, but Lucy saw. His twitching legs and furrowed eyebrows were of course big clues. Yet he still was very supportive. Every time Happy felt down because of Carla's cold behaviour, Natsu cheered him on, giving him money to buy an extra nice fish for Happy to give away. Lucy really had to give them better gift ideas though, once they had tried giving Carla a live eel instead, and she had ended up transforming into a human to run away faster. Who knew she was afraid of eels? And who knew she was that fast in her human form.

Lucy chuckled for herself at the memory. Yeah, she should definitely tell Happy to give her flowers or tea or something. She could at least spare Carla the terror of any other horrible sea creature.

After a quick round of shampoo, conditioner and body soap, she finally got out of the shower. She tried running a brush through her hair in an attempt to sort out the knots, but she quickly gave up. She would just have to brush it out when it dried.

When she left the bathroom, only dressed in a towel, she was met by a nice smell and the sound of sizzling coming from the kitchen.

“So, what are we having?” Lucy asked, secretly happy with getting a meal cooked for her. She would say that she was glad that it was free for a change, but she did buy the groceries with her own money after all.

“Curry ‘n rice,” Natsu answered, tongue sticking out of his mouth as he concentrated.

“Sounds nice. I’ll put on some clothes, then I’ll take over. You can take a bath or something while I finish it,” Lucy offered, once again not waiting for an answer before going into her bedroom where her wardrobe stood. She picked out a thin crop top and a pair of shorts in a soft material, before heading back into the kitchen.

“Now shoo,” the blonde said, dragging Natsu away from the bubbling pot.

“Wait! I didn’t turn on the stoves!”

Lucy grunted loudly.

“Whatever, I’ll fix it. You stink, here’s a towel, the opened medicines are to the left on the sink.”

Who knew the fire dragon slayer had such a passion for cooking? Lucy was pretty sure that was something only she knew about. Team Natsu never really had dinner the same way at Lucy’s. The only possible person who could have known about his cooking skills would be Lisanna, but to be frank, he didn’t really have enough control over his fire back when they played house. Happy knew about this skill of course, but then again, how could he not know about it? They lived together for god's sake.

As the clock struck 10pm Natsu finally left the bathroom, dressed in only a pair of chequered pyjama pants.

“Do you know where my t-shirt is?” He asked, lifting one of the pillows that laid on the couch.

“Oh yeah, it’s in the washer. Seriously, if you keep leaving your sleepover clothes here then you at least have to learn to wash them regularly!” Lucy scolded half heartedly, blushing slightly at the sight of her half naked best friend. It’s not as if she was immune to his muscular torso.

“Whatever, it’s not as if you ever come close enough to smell it anyways,” Natsu murmured as he made his way over to the table.

“Do I need to remind you that I also use the couch that I accidentally happen to OWN. If your clothes smell, then the couch will smell too. You seriously have to break your habit of sneaking in,” she groaned, knowing that her words had no effect whatsoever. “Nevermind that for now, did you see if Happy has woken up?”

“Nopfe, he’f ftill refting,” Natsu grunted, mouth full of hot curry.

“I’ll cut up some fish for him later then, hopefully he’ll get his energy back after a good meal.” Lucy pondered for a second, wondering if she maybe should wake him up anyways. He never liked missing meals and then having to eat alone. Lucy sometimes wondered if it was because he was unaccustomed to being alone, seeing as he always had the guild or Natsu around.

The mage decided to let him sleep on for now. Happy could wake one of them up if he wanted a snack in the middle of the night. It was already late enough for Lucy, so she sat down, finally digging in on the homemade food.

“Delicious!” She beamed, letting out a satisfied sigh before continuing letting the hot curry warm her up from the inside. Nothing tastes as good as a newly cooked meal after a long mission.

Natsu watched as the woman in front of him made a happy little dance before digging in. He had already eaten his portion of the food - almost four times the amount that Lucy had on her plate, and sat now and just watched as Lucy regained energy and warmth.

This was one of his favourite moments of the week. After many days sleeping in tents, constantly being on alert and never even getting the chance to clean themselves up, the smell and familiarity of Lucy’s apartment really made him feel safe. Sure, he might be a bit barbaric on missions, itching after someone to fight, not really caring about living conditions while he actually was on the mission, but getting back to this smell always made him shocked by how tense he had been the last week. Finding this type of ritual of sleeping the first night after a mission with Lucy, brought a sense of relaxation he didn’t know his body or mind possessed. Just coming home, chatting with Happy or starting cooking while Lucy took a bath or shower, and then himself taking a shower either while Lucy finishes or starts the food, or just after the meal. There was still one problem in Natsu’s opinion though. He still slept on the couch. After all these years she still wouldn’t let them share bed unless she was drunk or if he snuck in during the night.

While Lucy’s apartment smelled great, there was just something else he felt when he shared bed with her. Sometimes he got a boner, he was not going to lie, she is very attractive after all, but most of the time he felt something else. It could be called love, but for some reason that just didn’t sit right with Natsu. Love was great, no doubt, he had felt it lots of times, to his father, to his guildmates and to material things, but sleeping with Lucy was… Comforting. The combination of the sound of her soft breathing and her steady heart, and her cool skin against his hot, and then that special smell that he only could smell when they got really close. All this made him feel… Safe. Happy. Reassured. Content. If family could be an emotion, that is what he felt.

Even better was when Happy curled up in the middle of them, making Natsu able to smell and hear him too. Sometimes, when Natsu felt bold and cuddled really close to her, Happy would lay above their heads or close to Lucy’s belly. That’s when he truly slept the best.

Natsu knew that he wouldn’t exchange these two people for the world.

“Ya done?” He grinned, watching Lucy swallow the last forkful of food.

“Yep, that meal was exactly what I needed!” She purred, patting her belly. Natsu stood up and started putting away their plates.

“We’ll wash them tomorrow,” he croaked, filling the pots with water so that they would be easier to clean the next morning. Lucy just agreed as she began cutting up that fish she had promised Happy. When she was done Natsu had already removed all the dishes from the table.

“Let’s go to bed now,” Lucy suggested, a big yawn escaping her lips.

A small part of Natsu didn’t want to go to sleep just yet. His wounds were itching and he didn’t look forward to leaving Lucy’s presence. With Happy in Lucy’s bed he didn’t have anyone to cuddle with.

So, Natsu did what anyone would do in his situation. He took the lead, grabbing Lucy’s wrist on the way to her bed, only to gently fall into it and pull Lucy closer, wrapping his arms around her.

“N-Natsu… Hey... “ The mage was blushing furiously at his actions. Not that this was the first time he had done so, in fact, it happened more and more regularly nowadays.

She didn’t dislike sleeping in the same bed as Natsu. Quite the opposite to be honest. When she was cold she found herself cuddling up closer to his chest, feeling safe in his muscular arms. When it was hot outside they actually kept a good distance - but they always touched in one way or another. Legs tangled together, feet touching, or Lucy’s personal favourite - hand holding.

She vividly remembered that hot summer night in June, shortly after her birthday, when Natsu had climbed into her bed again. Natsu didn’t understand why she kept turning away and moving from him - he didn’t understand how unpleasant the summer heat was for normal people. He was a fire dragon slayer after all. In the end they just laid in bed, back to back. Natsu really wanted to turn the other way and hold his best friend close, but he knew that she was uncomfortable in the heat. Lucy didn’t know if it was her or Natsu who had grabbed the other’s hand in the middle of the night, but she remembered how important she felt that morning. He had respected her boundaries and still found a way to hold her close. It was heartwarming. Except the part when she saw that Happy had woken up early and raided her fridge in hope to find some yummy fishes. They ate breakfast at the guild that morning.

However, keeping that night in mind, Lucy finally gave in to Natsu’s demands.

“At least let us get under the covers first,” she mumbled, squeezing out of Natsu’s bear hug. She pulled Natsu to his feet as well and then crawled under her bedsheets. Natsu stood beside her bed, pouting in disappointment. Lucy giggled for herself before lifting up one side of the blanket, inviting him into bed. Natsu immediately lit up, jumping into bed with her, almost giving in to the temptation to cuddle up in her arms and sleep on those soft, squishy boobies. Once again, who could blame him for wanting to do that - not only would it be soft, warm and comfortable, but he would also be able to hear and feel the beat of her heart.

Of course, he didn’t do that. Natsu wasn’t a pervert (sometimes he wondered if he was though), but ever since Lucy showed up in his life his hormones had been acting up a bit. He had once felt a similar way for Lisanna, but nothing really blossomed on that part. Now he found himself accidentally seeing or feeling the curves of Lucy’s (sometimes naked) body and he actually got a boner from it. He had heard Gray and Loke talk about relieving themselves if the tension got too bad, but he only tried it once. He felt bad about it later though because he had thought some nasty thoughts about Lucy, so he never tried it again. No, Natsu wasn’t actually a pervert. He could go almost a month without thinking about Lucy in a non-platonic way, but one week every month Lucy smelled different. Wondering about this odd occasion, he had actually asked Levy about it. She had gotten all flustered and thought he meant that Lucy and the other girls smelled period blood, but then he explained that that wasn’t it. It came almost a week before that, and only from Lucy too. Levy explained that it possibly had something to do with her ovulation - the perfect time to impregnate a woman. This time Natsu had gotten flustered instead. He didn’t want to impregnate Lucy! Not then anyways. Not now either. He was far too young to have kids, and besides, it was his best friend they were talking about.

No, Natsu wasn’t a pervert. He never acted on these thoughts. He knew that Lucy wanted her lines between friends, best friends and lovers to be clear. Natsu didn’t mind being all over the place. He could easily bleed over all the lines, just them being them was enough for him. But Lucy wanted them to stay as best friends - not because she didn’t want to be with Natsu, but she just wasn’t ready to take that step yet. And Natsu respected that. He wasn’t sure of course if she ever wanted to have a romantic relationship with him - how could he be? But he had faith that they both would come around some day and show the world that relationships don't need to be complicated - they just needed to be happy together, and if kissing, cuddling, chatting or raw sex was the source of it, then so be it. In Natsu’s opinion anyways. Lucy still wanted things a bit more traditional, but it was clear that as long as they made each other happy it didn’t really matter if they had ever gone on a real date or not. They didn’t mind being more than friends, less than lovers.

Now, since Natsu respected Lucy, he didn’t use her chest as his pillow - even if it tempted him to, but instead he laid down beside her, faces facing, and he did the one thing he had never done before. As Natsu settled down beside Lucy, they had locked eyes. Lucy’s big brown eyes were dazy of tiredness, and her lips were turned upwards in a little smile. Natsu had a crooked smirk on his lips, still happy with his accomplishment of sleeping in her bed. As they gazed into each other's eyes they somehow found themself moving a tiny bit closer. Natsu lifted his head up slightly and gave Lucy a light peck on her lips. The kiss was short, Lucy had barely felt Natsu’s dry, chapped lips against hers before it was over. She just smiled though, not feeling as frustrated as she probably could have felt.

“Goodnight Natsu,” she said as a light blush danced on her cheeks.

“Goodnight Lucy,” Natsu whispered back. They both closed their eyes but still felt their hearts flutter as their hands reached each other.

Yeah. There was no need to rush this family. They understood each other perfectly fine, and after all, they were going to stay together forever, right?

[kierancampire]

Today marks 2 years since I got the girls :) So here are some comparison photos from the start and now! Just as an FYI, the Disney Castle is up and out of reach, but I brought it down just for the comparison

I will try and keep this short, but yeah that's pretty much it, just the 2 year anniversary. However I do wanna say some things. From day one my life has never been good or happy, and 2018-2023 were particularly hard years, I went through multiple, extensive, severe traumas, I was homeless twice, I lost everything, but what destroyed me was being forced to give up my cat Roxy, she was my reason for living and fighting, and I always told myself I'd get her back, but deep down I knew I wouldn't

I don't really have any friends, I speak to very little family, I am rather isolated in life. And when I went back to wherever I was living, I hated it, there was no life, no warmth, no desire to be there. Then I moved to this place, continue to went through hell, but at least I was finally living by myself in an "actual" home, but it was never home for me. But one day mum messaged saying a lady she knew found and was looking to get rid of kittens, then along came these two

I realised sometimes I feel like I'm taking it for granted. For the first time in a long time, I feel a desire to go back home, I want to be home, when I go out I look forward to coming back, and it's because I know they're there waiting for me. My home has life in it, it has personality, it's not just this cold dead space. But that's another thing, I realised I started referring to it as home. I honestly don't know if I ever really feel I had a home, I've never had a place I felt I belong, I never had a place I felt safe or secure, but these girls make me feel like this is home. They've given me purpose again, they've given me joy, life, they mean the world to me

It's funny reading about their first day here, in some ways they are the same, in others they are so different. Coraline is less affectionate and clingy, but she is still so bolshy, curious, and has to get involved in everything. Ember was so standoffish at first and wanted nothing to do with me, but now it's hard to make her leave me alone! Also as I'd be posting it soon anyway, here's what the tattoo looks like a year later :) I was hesitant about getting the girls at first, I sometimes still have fears. But I am so glad I did get them now, I know what life was like without them, and I hope to never live that life again. They're gonna get their favourite tuna fillet today and some catnip in celebration :)

[filthyjoetini]

Stumblin' In

a/n: Well...it's been...a while. heh. Sorry. I've been going through a lot. On here (the accusations...) as well as in life. Latter keeps me busy to no end. It's exhausting...but I'm back. beta-reader, editor, partner in crime: @barfightzanddiscolightz

warnings: mentions of previous injury, rpf, fem!reader, cuteness overload

wordcount: 2.2k

part 1 - part 2 - part 4

Part 3

You let yourself fall face down on the sofa with a loud sigh. The last few days had been nothing short of exhausting. Your back and neck still hurt, and the concussion had caused some nightmarish migraines that had left you unable to work. So, you spent your days in your dark living room, accompanied by your two cats, Freya and Kiro. Freya, a chubby lady with a moustache who you had had to put on a diet, was sitting on the back of your sofa, silently judging you. Kiro, your long-haired void of a cat, sat next to you, purring in your ear.

When you had come home from the hospital almost a week ago, they had greeted you with loud, screaming meows as if they had been starving. Your dad had been looking after them, cuddling them and feeding them generously. You also knew that he had given each of them a little treat every time before he left. So much for starving. Total drama queens - Both of them. But that's just Freya and Kiro, you wouldn't trade them for any other cats in the world.

Today had been your first day back at work and you wished you hadn’t gone. Your migraines had stopped the day before, but your body was still killing you. Groaning, you pushed yourself up to sit properly on your sofa, your legs sprawled out on its long chaise longue. You took a blanket from the basket beside it and pulled it neatly over your legs. Kiro immediately took this as an invitation to plop down between your legs. You were about to open one of your newly ordered books when your phone buzzed. A new message.

Huffing annoyedly, you picked up your phone from where it lay beside you to check who had the audacity to disturb your precious reading time.

It was Joe. Forgotten were your pain and shitty mood.

He hadn't texted you in days and, not wanting to appear desperate, you hadn't texted him either. That's just the way you were, constantly thinking that you were annoying people with your presence.

Pushing the negative thoughts to the back of your mind and grinning to yourself, you quickly unlocked your phone and read his message.

Bambi on ice! How are you?

You rolled your eyes at his new name for you. You got it, you're a klutz.

Hello to you too, Joe... I'm fine. How are you?

I'm good. Very busy. That's why I haven't texted you the last few days. I'm sorry about that.

Oh... you don't have to apologise. It's fine.

No. I don't want you to get the wrong impression. I'm working abroad at the moment, and I only have internet when I'm back in my temporary home. And then I get flooded with messages and things to check as soon as my phone connects to the internet. I didn't mean to forget about you.

You read the last sentence he wrote not once, but twice... no screw it, five times. You'd be lying if you said it didn't affect you. The slight pink tint to your cheeks betrayed you and you were glad no one was around to point it out. You had to change the subject. This is too much lovey-dovey bullshit. You were not ready for this... yet.

How are you supposed to do your hacking without internet? Must be difficult.

Perfect.

All Joe did was send a series of eyeroll emojis that made you giggle.

It's a top-secret mission, you know. We're doing it the old-fashioned way. Infiltrate and then destroy. 😉

All right there, soldier. Top secret. Got it.

But I'll be back in four days!

Amazing! Quick in and out then?

Yeah...something like that. Hey... I was wondering if you were up for that date you owe me when I get back?

You stared at his question and the blush crept back into your cheeks. Here you were again. Back to the subject you had hoped to avoid, at least for a little while longer.

While you had agreed to go on a date with him, your motivation was more to please him and get off the hook so you could get inside your house. You were knackered and just wanted to rest. Days had passed, and you had been beating yourself up about agreeing. You weren't dating at the moment. You found contentment in the way your life was going. Nevertheless, you had promised him, and breaking a promise was not your style.

Swallowing hard, you let your fingers tap out your response.

Sure! Just let me know when and where and I'll be there 😊

Great! Can't wait!

Me either!

Listen, I gotta go now. Duty calls! Text soon?

Of course! Good luck with your mission.

Thanks! Bye, darling xx

Bye Joe xx

---

Fuck. You had an official date. With Joe. You needed to tell a certain someone.

"Brother in Christ. How are you?"

Of course, your best friend would pick up like that. You pushed yourself up a little, which made your legs move, much to Kiro's displeasure. The cat glared at you, and you quickly apologised with a kiss to his head.

"I'm fine...guess what!", you tried her, gnawing on your bottom lip.

"You finally managed to put your summer clothes in the basement?" she guessed.

"Well, yeah...but that's not what I wanted you to guess.", you snorted and then blurted it out: "I-have-a-date."

"What?"

"I HAVE A DATE!”, you repeated, almost shouting. Since your neighbours were all half deaf anyway, you didn't care that you had just raised your voice.

“Ouch, don’t yell at m- WAIT! You?! Have a date?!”, she sputtered.

"Yes!”, you replied in a breezy voice.

"With who?"

"Joe.", you replied so quietly that she almost didn't hear it, but her gasp gave her away.

"Joe. As in 'your knight in a beige cable-knit jumper'-Joe?"

"Yes!”, you squeaked out, earning a glare from both your cats.

"Holy shit, babes! This is like one of those romance films we sometimes watch on film night.”, she gushed, clearly very excited for you.

"Ugh, yeah. I know.”, you groaned. "I need your help. I don't have anything to wear!"

"Lies! Your wardrobe is bursting at the seams."

Which was true, but she didn't have to expose you like that.

"I know. Can you help me put together an outfit? I will repay you fabulously!"

"Ahhh... just deduct it from the mountain of drinks-debt I owe you. I'll be there in 20 minutes!"

"Wait! The date's not even se-", you started, but she had already hung up. Typical her.

18 minutes later your doorbell rang and there she stood in all her 'hair in a messy bun, oversized jumper, leggings with a questionable stain and the oldest trainers she could find' glory. Her face was sporting a huge grin.

"You look absolutely insane." you pointed out as soon as you opened the door, chuckling. She snorted and pushed past you, heading for your room. You quickly followed, knowing full well that without you, she'd start pulling out pieces of clothing from your closet and throwing them on your bed.

---

She had been rummaging through your wardrobe for almost two hours now and had mentioned that you had 'too many things' at least 20 times, accompanied by an eyeroll, whilst you made yourself comfortable on your bed. Your cats had decided to join you for a while, but the mess she was making was too much for them and they went back to the living room.

She was standing on one of the shelves in the closet, trying to get to the top shelf. It was the most hilarious thing you had ever seen, you had to snap a picture. Without thinking, you sent it to Joe.

Who’s that?

My best friend. She’s a madwoman.

I can see that, and I see how she’s your bestie. You both like to put yourselves in dangerous situations. I bet she’s pulled a Humpty Dumpty before as well.

You snorted at his text, earning a raised eyebrow from your friend who was still standing in your wardrobe. When she saw you were on your phone, she gasped and jumped out of the wardrobe. She quickly made her way over to you.

"Who are you texting?", she demanded, her eyes narrowing.

"Nobody."

"Bullshit.”, she claimed, holding out her hand to you. "Give me the phone."

"No.”, you giggled, trying to crawl away from her, but to no avail. She was very quick and snatched the phone out of your fingers. Her eyes went wide.

"BITCH! Stop sending pictures of me to your boyfriend!"

"He's not my boyfriend!", you argued, snorting and laughing at the face she was making.

"He better be after your date...", she muttered, tossing your phone back at you, which you almost caught with your face. "I've got your outfit."

With a huge grin, she walked back over to your wardrobe and picked up a few stray clothes. Then she laid them out orderly on your bed. It was perfect. Totally you. Totally the opposite of Joe. You'd stick out like a sore thumb.

“Thanks babe.”, you smiled, pushing yourself off the bed and engulfing her in a tight hug.

"Anytime, love.”, she grinned into your hair and returned your hug with an even tighter one.

"Coffee and biscuits?", you asked her as you pulled away and her face lit up all over again. She didn't even answer your question but ran off to the kitchen.

"You better have chocolate chip cookies!", you heard her yell, knowing she'd already opened your cupboard where you stored your sweets. When you heard her excited squeak, you knew she had found them. Shaking your head at her antics, you made your way to the kitchen to join her. You wouldn't trade her for anything in the world, either.

---

When your best friend left, it was already dark outside. You opted for a light dinner which consisted of a piece of sourdough bread, half a tomato, a handful of shredded cheddar cheese and three green olives. Everything was neatly arranged on the plate. Girl Dinner was served.

Walking over to the sofa to read for the second time that evening, you placed your plate on the small table in front of it, sat down and draped a blanket over yourself. Picking up the plate, you leaned back against the headrest and popped an olive into your mouth. Freya and Kiro soon joined you and tried to beg you for some of the sourdough. Kiro was particularly persistent, but so were you. When they finally realised you weren't going to give in, Kiro trotted off to sulk under one of your chairs and Freya retreated to her place on the headrest.

You were just about to open your book when your phone again alerted you to a new message. Thinking it was your best friend letting you know she had gotten home, you leaned forward to grab your phone. But it wasn't your best friend. Joe had texted you again.

Did you have dinner?

Uh... yeah. Why?

Oh, just checking. What are you doing?

I wanted to read, but a certain someone keeps interrupting.

Oh! My apologies. What are you reading?

This. *attachment*

Ooh. This looks interesting. What's it about?

Instead of telling him, you took a picture of the summary on the back.

It sounds very interesting. I'll stop bothering you now. Go read!

You're not bothering me, Joe.

Your last message stayed unread, and you frowned at your phone. After a couple of moments, you put your phone aside and finally started reading where you had left off.

---

You were about to take a sip of the tea you had made yourself an hour into reading when your phone beeped again. You wondered who it was. It certainly wasn't your best friend. She had let you know that she had arrived home shortly after Joe had dropped the conversation. You had a hunch, though.

Turning your phone around, you saw that Joe had sent you a picture. With a gentle tap to the screen, you enlarged the photo. It was a book, but not just any book. It was the same book you were reading. Smiling to yourself, you tapped on the picture again and added a heart reaction to it.

Then another message from Joe.

Now we can have our own little book club.

Those nine words instantly made your heart flutter.

Just the two of us?

Yep.

Count me in...

Brilliant! I was hoping you'd say yes. It'd be a shitty book club if I was on my own.

Yep. The discussions would be very one-sided.

And boring. OK, I'll let you read. I'm sure you're way ahead of me. I just got it and I gotta catch up so we can discuss it on our date.

I'd love that. Talk later?

Of course we will. Happy reading! Bye, darling xx

You too! Bye Joe xx

Grinning from ear to ear, you put your phone down and picked up your book up again. You’d never been happier that you had so mindlessly agreed to a date before.

---

Taglist:

@ohmeg @daleyeahson @lma1986 @palomahasenteredthechat @mandyjo8719 @aysheashea @littledemon-lilith @freakymunson @sidthedollface2 @i-wont-run-this-time @miserybeans @kylakins88 @thehillzhaveeyez @punctualhowell @icallhimjoey @ghostinthebackofyourhead @siriuslysmoking @cancankiki @definitionwanderlust @1paire2vans @theonewiththecrackedmind @fromasgardandback @captainonaboat @josephquinnsfreckles @emilyslutface @alessxa

there's still some spots left on the taglist :)

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 14 thoughts from 14.8 through the end:

Gonna get a little bit gay up in here pretty soon. But first, some other stuff.

Pretty much jump right into "Oh shit everything is fucked" with the bio-weapon just spreading everywhere right away.

Skitter's focus on Tattletale specifically when trying to get them to higher ground was top level Chatterbug/Smugbug content. Like sure Sundancer and Trickster too, she wanted to save them. But when Bentley wasn't climbing fast enough what she said to herself in worry was "Tattletale."

Fucking god. Tattletale telling Skitter to fly to the higher building and use bugs so Trickster could teleport them and they'd follow? But fully knowing it wouldn't work and just trying to get Skitter to safety?

"It doesn’t look like her plan will work out. Tell her I’m sorry." - I WAS FUCKING BAWLING

I had figured that Bonesaw's contingency wasn't just a "everyone dies right now" virus or whatever. It would need to be artistic. And it would need to be a punishment to the local capes, both hero and villain. And the way to punish them would be to "take the city from them". "Make them watch it destroy itself." "Make them help".

I feel like what she did covered that general outline with a heavier focus on taking everything away from the capes. But still, god damn Bonesaw. Absolutely fucking terrifying. Super powered face blindness. At the base at least. Don't know who anyone is. Damn.

SKITTER IT'S NOT GAY YET THAT ISN'T TATTLETALE IT'S BONESAW! GAY WILL COME LATER!

If Jack put's his slimy fucking hands on my daughter again I will personally remove them.

The "Don't swear!" from Bonesaw while pretending to be Tattletale was fun. I managed to hit on it before that, but it was a good confirmation.

Fucking Jack and his "You’re versatile" after seeing Skitter make decoys while prepping to tie someone up with spiders. FUCK OFF WITH YOUR DREAMS YOU DICK. YOU CAN'T HAVE HER.

Instantly confirmed when Skitter flat refused to shoot someone despite Jack and Bonesaw telling her to. My daughter might not be perfect but she's not going to be one of you!

Coil fucked up a bit on the phone. He wasn't dealing with the pathogen so he should have done better. Even just asking everyone there to say something so he could listen to the voices. He would have known right away it wasn't Tattletale and Grue. Patching them through to Cherish that easily was a mistake. He really doesn't do as much as he could be. Like ya he's evil but that doesn't mean I'm not disappointed when he isn't using his full potential.

Cherish very fucked up when she thought letting Jack and Bonesaw know where she was would be good for her. Hope she likes her eternal torment at the bottom of the ocean. (Ok there's a chance she'll get pulled out in the future I guess.)

I'll admit, when Amy left with Victoria earlier I wasn't expecting to see them again so soon.

"Panacea is the healer, top floor, Jack is the slasher, the blond girl is the chemist-tinker." I don't know why, since it doesn't rhyme or anything, but I got very "The pellet with the poison's in the flagon with the dragon; the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true" vibes from this.

Jack trying to convince Amy by talking about how many of her ancestors were successful by being cruel and Taylor just internally going "How many were successful because they cooperated?" Love my daughter.

Victoria is still very much . . . not dead.

HOLY SHIT AMY YOU PUT YOUR SISTER IN A PERSONALIZED FLESH COFFIN MADE FROM CATS AND DOGS?

Seriously. Personalized. It has her face on the outside made out of bone. What the actual fuck Amy?

Proud of my daughter for shooting Jack, even if it didn't work.

It's probably fine that Skitter got Amy to break her brain rule again. I mean like it's good. It was the only way to fix the pathogen. It saved herself and the city. That is all good. Just . . . there might also be some long term negative outcomes. Probably fine though.

Getting gets cured and goes off to cure the city be gay.

"I leaned forward and planted a quick kiss on her lips." - EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!

WOLFSPIDER WOLFSPIDER WOLFSPIDER!

SO FUCKING GAY I LOST MY FUCKING MIND WHEN IT HAPPENED

"'You couldn’t have waited until after you’d cured me before you put the bugs on your face?' Tattletale asked. She was smiling as she asked it." - ALSO EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

SO GAY. DOUBLE GAY. EXTRA GAY. ALL THE GAY!

CHATTERBUGCHATTERBUGCHATTERBUG (SMUGBUG IS FINE TOO)!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also the level of effort the girls went through after that trying to figure out how to cure Grue and Regent without kissing? Fucking amazing. Kissing was only ok for these three. Obviously.

GAAAAAAY

Gay (bug)horse girl gay (bug)horse girl gay (bug)horse girl

And the remainder of the Nine got away. Which is pretty fucking bad I guess. What with the whole "end of the world" and all that. I get that story point is the *actual* big end of the arc. But it's been overshadowed. By the gays.

Did I mention things being gay? I just want to make sure. Cause they were. Gay that is.

Interlude 1 - Sierra is amazing. She is exactly who Skitter needs to be running things while she's away. Charlotte is also amazing and I think worships the ground Skitter walks on. My daughter is, as always, absolutely terrifying when described from anyone else's PoV. She only gets more so every time. She just uses bug speak without even realizing now. Amazing. I love her. Atlas is helping and I'm so proud of him. He even got to take the gun. I hope he gets to keep it.

Interlude 2 (thought about making this it's own post but I'll just keep it really simple) - God dammit all three of the big 3 are Cauldron created? Ugh. Legend you appear to be trying to do the right thing but you sure as shit aren't paying much attention are you? Holy shit like, you believed so much of what the Doctor has been saying for years? God damn bud. How could you look at Cauldron and assume they *aren't* doing human experimentation? Especially since you know they have done it in the past! Like god damn man! At least you do kind of acknowledge that maybe you were purposefully ignoring the signs cause you wanted to be ignorant. Maybe there is a little bit of hope for you. Hell of a lore dump interlude though. Gives me lots to think about. Also I'd absolutely listen to The Number Man talk about spreadsheets all day long.

GAY

[blosoms-blocky-world]

Hermits and Empires DnD Part 1

"Welcome to our first DnD session…I am your humble dungeon master. So let's take a look at what's happened leading up to present times…the Rapture."

The Rapture was an event that shook servers to its core. Causing strange and often destructive occurrences to happen, such as moons falling, entire empires being cracked and in the worst case scenarios, entire worlds known as servers being destroyed. This even even ripped some people out of their own server, sometimes warping them back in time and placing them in another server. No one knows what caused it. Many servers ended up colliding with each other and forming the world we know now…

"Oh Grian!" A familiar chipper voice called from bellow. Grian looked down from his perch to see Scar waving him down. He chuckled before flying down from the floating rocks he had constructed.

"What's up Scar?" He asked waving. "You've got mail!" He said holding out an envelope. "What are you my mail man?" He asked taking it.

"I don't know, these four letters appeared on my doorstep. I asked Pearl and Impulse to meet us over here, there's one for them too." Grian shrugged, noting the wax seal with two swords going into a block with a crown on top.

"Huh, I wonder where this came from." He replied, scratching his head. "Beats me," Scar replied.

"Wonder where what came from?" Impulse's voice came from behind them. The dwarf was a few feet smaller then the two, with a great bushy beard and hair pulled back to show horns coming out of his forehead. Accompanying him was his base neighbor and Grian's sister Pearl.

"We got mail?" She asked seeing the envelopes. Scar handed them out. "Yea I don't know they just appeared at my base," He said scratching his head. He took a seat in his wheelchair as the four began to open their letters.

Grian I send this letter to you from the server of Empires I, Pixlriffs of the Ancient Capital request the presence of you and three other Hermits in the Capital. I wish for you to take a rift at these coordinates. It will take you to my server, Empires for a meeting with 6 other people. I have a job for you regarding the Rapture, an event which I know you know well.

Warmest regards Pixlriffs, Ancient Capital Archeologist

"What's this then?" Pearl asked. "An invitation to an ancient capital? For a job?" "Sounds like it," Impulse replied. "I wonder if any other Hermits received this."

"I asked around, Xsuma has no clue about this. He suggested it might be from another server," Scar replied "Do we have directions?" Grian asked.

"It says to take the rift at these coordinates," Pearl replied. "Wait G, isn't that…" Impulse pointed out, glancing down at the hole under Grian's base.

"Yea I guess it is." He shrugged flying down. "Wait for me!" Pearl called, flying after him with her owl wings.

"G! I hope you made a way down for us!" Impulse shouted from the top. "There's an elevator don't worry! I didn't forget we can't get Elytra's anymore. End's closed off!"

Scar and Impulse soon joined the two Avian's as they looked into the strange rift Grian had uncovered days prior.

"So how does it know where to take us?" Impulse asked. "Doesn't say," Pearl said. "I guess it just does." Scar slowly rose to his feet, grabbing his cane from nearby.

"You sure you'll be fine with your cane Scar?" Grian asked. "Oh I'll be fine don't worry about me," He replied smiling. He tapped the chair twice, watching as it shrunk down into a small orb. He put it on his hip before whistling for his cat.

"Oh Jellie!" The spectral cat meowed, jumping down from the top of the hole, landing on his shoulders. He smiled, tipping his hat. "Let's go go go!" Impulse laughed shaking his head.

"I say we all hold onto each other to make sure we don't get separated." "Good idea mate," Pearl said, holding onto her brothers sweater. "Don't want to get separated from you again."

"I'm seriously having Deja vu," Grian replied making Impulse and Scar laugh. Pearl just smiled at him nodding. "Me too Grian, me too." She held onto Impulse who held onto Scar.

"Ready?" Grian asked. The other three nodded as they started to run in. "Geronimo!" "Allons-y!" Scar yelled out in a fake British accent. "Oh for gods sake!" Impulse shouted. "Woooooo!" Pearl shouted, as they all jumped into the rift.

"Soft landing," Impulse said landing on his feet. Grian hovered for a moment before landing down with Pearl. Scar came through and almost fell over.

"Whew, I tell you what someone passed gas," He said, stabilizing himself with his cane. "Hey look a festival!" Peal said pointing up.

"Did we even bring our Diamonds?" Impulse asked, patting his pocket. "Oh no," Grian said sighing. He felt around and pulled out some gold coins. "Mine are in my ender chest."

"Same," Scar said sighing. "X warned if we were heading to another server our ender chest wouldn't work. Even though a bunch of servers combined into one."

"Well looks like we've got gold to work with," Grian said sighing. "We could scam-I mean make some money," Scar replied, his eyebrows wiggling around.

"Scar!" Pearl said smacking him. "First thing you do is try to scam someone!" "Well haven't you two made some fun friends." Pearl and Grian turned around to see an old friend leaning on the rocks.

"Martyn!" Pearl yelled out, running out and hugging him. "Oh it's so good to see you. Where have you been?"

"In the void," Martyn replied causally shrugging. "The void!?" Grian exclaimed.

"Hey you can't say much!" He said pointing at him. "Hmm touché," He mumbled before laughing

"Mind introducing us?" Impulse asked, scratching his beard. "Oh right, Impulse, Scar this is Martyn," Pearl said smiling. "He's a friend of ours from the Evo server!"

"Martyn don't run off!" Another voice shouted. A smaller female rushed over, wearing a large witches hat

"Sorry Shelby, I got excited," he said sheepishly scratching his head. "Oh this is Shubble, I've been helping her out with some jobs around her empire."

"Nice to meet you all. You guys didn't get a letter from Pix about a job did you?" Shelby asked, holding up her letter.

"Yea we did," Impulse said holding up his. "Huh so that's…" Scar counted on his fingers. "Six of us, where are the other two?" At that moment, horns rang out from the festival. The six of them slowly went back up to the grounds to see what the commotion was about.

"Introducing Princess Gem of Dawn and Scott of Chromia!" An announcer rang out. Scott shook his head, adjusting his fedora on his head.

"Was that really necessary?" He asked, tying up one of his many lama friends in the pens. "I know," Gem said sighing. "A bit too out there for my liking."

"If it was Oli I'd be fine with it," Scott said chuckling. "Agreed. Now we need to find Pix and ask him about the letter."

"We should at least pay tribute to the fallen empires," He said softly. "A lot of my population are from Rivendell, and I'd like to respect the ruler."

"That's a good point," she said sighing, rubbing her arms. "You miss them?" He asked softly.

"Yea," she said, playing with her pink dress. "I miss a lot of them…" She glanced up at the banner of her former kingdom and academy, Crystal Cliffs.

"Gem!?" She quickly jolted looking over to see a dwarf and avian, who looked a lot like Pearl looking at the two.

"Oh shoot!" She said, bolting in the opposite direction. "Cover for me Scott!" He stood there confused, watching the two chase after her.

"Get back here missy! Where have you been!?" The avian shouted flying after her. Scott laughed, a little confused before glancing at the tent representing Rivendell. He sighed going over, glancing down at his hands before kneeling and muttering a small prayer. He shut his eyes for a moment before-

"Scott!" He jumped up and yelped, turning around to see Shelby standing there laughing. "Don't scare me like that Shelby! Sensitive ears!" He pointed to his barley hidden pointed ears before laughing with her. "Is this about Pix's letter?"

"Yea how'd you know?" She asked crossing her arms "Cause Pix also sent me one too." He nodded before noticing the other three guys behind her. "Ello strangers. Scott of Chromia at your service."

"Can I try on your hat?" The wood elf asked with a smirk. "Scar!" The avian squaked at him. "What it's fancy!"

"Don't give it to him, you won't get it back," he said. "How dare you accuse me of such a thing Grian!" Scott laughed before pulling out an extra.

"Here you go," he said smiling. "Yay!" Scar said taking it and putting it on. "Oh Scar, it even looks good on you," Grian said shaking his head.

"He looks so shady," The half elf said laughing. "I'm Martyn by the way." Scar laughed, leaning over to Scott. "Why don't you step into my office and we'll discuss some deals." The four of them laughed brightly.

"Scott help!" He looked over to see Gem caught by the two and lifted by Pearl. "Watch it Pearl I'm wearing a dress!"

"Is this where you've been this whole time?! We've been worried sick about you!" Impulse scolded. The group laughed once again, before the sun set over the mountains. They jolted hearing fireworks go off.

"So pretty!" Pearl said putting Gem down. Grian nodded before glancing over at the bridge. "Hey Scott how well is that bridge lit up?" He asked.

"Umm I'd say well why?" He asked. "Cause there's a bunch of mobs heading straight across it!"