#so its like... guess i'll just die alone..

[swankpalanquin]

i do understand why people from the same small town all marry each other cos if you try to engage with the greater world, you realize just how small your world was growing up and it sucks to feel inferior every time you interact with people who had more and better life experiences :\

[grace4867]

Please please please please please please please please please please please please

[furiouszealot]

UPDATE: As of 25/04/2025, 4chan is back up and running again. This post and its addendum will be kept as is, and will no longer be updated unless it goes back down again. If you were on /ghost/, it was a pleasure shitposting with you.

All right, I know no one gives a shit, but let me give you a recounting of the fall of 4chan from the perspective of someone who was there and has been lurking both 4chan and tumblr for a few years now.

I'll try to provide as much context as I can, but a lot of images were either lost or im too lazy to look for them in the +5000 reply thread in soyjak party.

Anyways, info below:

So, necessary context: a few years back, 4chan had a board called /qa/, which if you know little about the page, you may think every board is like /b/ or /pol/, which means a containment cess pool of grifters, (you) baiters, incels, and other deranged individuals. The thing is, /qa/ was somehow worse. The entire board was plagued and infested with soyjack edits, board culture was a nuclear disaster, anons were incredibly hostile in there, you know the drill, the big bad 4chan, but this time its actually true.

One day, moderation deleted /qa/, anons that posted there got mad, tried to raid other boards, failed, and then moved on to an altchan called soyjack party, which entire purpose you can guess from its name alone.

Apparently, the boards that allow pdf uploads (paper and origami, for example) didn't check if the uploaded file was actually a pdf file, so postscript files could be used to get access. This is as far as my understanding of web backend goes, sorry.

The hacker claims to have been working on this since 2021, and that he had access since about a year ago, but was recopilating data.

Now, what actually happened when the hack ocurred? Well, a banner of miku dancing with a song that played automatically was placed on top of every board, with the text "/QA/ IS BACK", this was possible because apparently no board was ever deleted, they were just hidden from the public.

A thread was then made on soyjack party, claiming authorship over the hack, and shit went south from there. Anons went en masse to talk there, a lot of weird discussion happened, the thread got the bump limit removed and got pinned, more than 5k posts were amassed on the first night alone. Keep in mind this happened at about 8 pm and most of the stuff went on through midnight.

So, the hacker leaked some things, first of all, the html files for the entirety of /j/ and the email address for every moderation member (important note: the pressence of .gov mails was disproven by the hacker themselves, so i guess there were never any feds), what is /j/? the board exclusive for jannies and moderators to discuss actions taken on the website regarding spam, ban evaders, threads spiraling out of control, etc. Among other things, some of the inner workings of 4chan got revealed, such as the web extension for jannies that allows them to do their job easily, how reports are handled, and other stuff. (Anecdotically, some guy got permabanned for calling anons jews or n-words over a 100 times in the same few threads)

Then, the source code got leaked. Important to say, the hacker removed the part of the source code related to the captcha, as to not facilitate bot attacks on the future, and all information related to email verification or 4chan pass users information also got removed, so all in all users are safe.

What was found on the sourcecode? That it was old, mostly. Most boards used code that hasn't been updated since about 2016, and /flash/ used the exact same code from when it was created back on 2011.

From there, desuarchive, a site that archives threads that die from bump limit, opened a dragon ball general on ghost mode, and thus began what later got called /ghost/, a solely text based thread with well over 20k replies as of right now, where a fraction of the 4chan population took refuge and is currently discussing random things with no particular topic. Kinda hard to read, but its comfy.

What does this mean for other sites? Not a lot, really. A lot of anons already crossposted in 4chan and tumblr already, and the ones that din't most likely wont come here. Some of the bigger/most dedicated groups, like /vt/, migrated to other boards. Various altchans are trying/tried to catch some of the flock of users that got lost, but i doubt it will get anywhere, since soyjak party for example was struggling with just the influx of users that came for the hack thread given its poor infrastructure. Kiwifarms saw a surge of new accounts apparently, but a lot of anons kinda loathe the idea of having to register, so theres that.

Smaller communities, such as generals that didn't get a lot of traffic, or boards on the slower end (say, /ic/, /lit/, etc) will probably vanish or disseminate until (or if) 4chan comes back up. I'd say give it a month, don't get your hopes up whether you want it to stay dead or want it to come back.

Given how many anons are staying on places like /ghost/ or other similar archives with the same ghost posting feature, i doubt it will be as bad as people are making it sound. Besides, the communities that are most likely to migrate to places like tumblr are either /co/, /vg/ or /lgbt/ refugees, which aren't THAT bad. Not every board was like the main cesspools (/b/, /r9k/, /pol/).

From now on, either 4chan comes back up in a few weeks (somewhere between 2 weeks to a month is expected), altchans capture the migrating anons, or a brand new imageboard rises from the ashes to become the new go-to site for old 4chan posters.

In conclusion, nothing ever happens, but also don't worry, chances are this won't affect tumblr in the slightest. If it does, you can cash in your "you were wrong" ticket whenever you want, i'll take the L.

As a footnote, keep in mind: NO users were compromised, if you ever posted there and are worried for your safety, physical or digital, you are safe.

Edit: Forgot to add, if you are a 4chan refugee, im BEGGING you to dm me and tell what board you were from and where are you migrating, if at all.

[yanderenightmare]

Gojo Satoru

TW: implied noncon, desperate starved reader, God!Gojo

gn reader

based on this by @hawnks

He's worshipped, but worship alone doesn’t make those who pray by his shrine his belongings.

Even pets run away when they don't like the food.

He could take lives, which suppose some of his fellow gods might view as ownership, but right when he ran out of places to wash the blood off his hands, he’d sooner found it to be an empty pastime bearing no merit.

After all, taking lives doesn't mean they belong to you—it just means they’re dead. 

He'd come to realize that the power to take is a far cry from the prospect of actually owning something—something he can truly call his. He could level a forest and everything in it, crush mountains to deserts, drink the entire ocean dry—but it wouldn’t make any of it his.

It leaves him feeling stingy when yet another measly human comes before him—on your knees with your forehead bowed in the dirt, skinny hands shaking while laid flat out before you, cracked lips crying his name.

With his chin propped in his palm, he yawns while listening to you, and with jaded eyes, he nearly dismisses you altogether. But there’d been a question he’d been mulling over lately—one that had found its way to the tip of his tongue.

“What do I get in return?”

You’re only asking for very little—one of the humbler humans who still bother praying to him. You might see it as greedy of him to ask you for something in return—a poor soul with nothing but your sorry name. But what you don’t understand is that you and he are the exact same.

Dirt poor.

In many ways, he has it a lot worse. You could die. He could not. Infinity would pan on forever and drag him with it as if with a ball and chain—and he’d remain destitute and alone for the entirety of it all.

Which is why…

“You can have me, I guess…”

It sounded so sweet—like a vow.

You say it with such defeat, as though you’ve already accepted his rejection—as though you’re about to offer yourself to the forest next—as though you're worth nothing more than returning to soil again. 

You don’t notice the new light in his eyes that threatens to swallow you whole, nor do you hear the growl in his gut like a beast awoken from a deep slumber—starved to death if he only could. His tongue swells with sweetness, it nearly runs over and spills down his chin.

Your offer hangs still in the air, poised and waiting for him to grab it, brighter than a star. It nearly frightens him—how much he wants it—how desperately he yearns for it. His fingertips buzz with thrill as he reaches out. He’s never held something like it before—soft and warm and flickering with something fleeting and precious. It almost feels wrong for him to hold it in his blood-soaked hands. Eyes all but blacked out as he looks down at it.

“Mine, you say?” 

You feel it, too, but it’s not close to the same sense of elevation—how he reaches into your chest and scribbles his name on your soul. Each letter is heavier than the last and leaves you curling in on yourself in agony, screaming before you fall silent.

Panting once you look up, you clutch your chest, only to see his sneer gone, replaced by something worse—something haunting.

The regret is palpable. You pick yourself up and take to running away—but by then, it’s too late. You don’t make it more than two steps before something has you tugged right back—this time into his embrace.

“I accept your generous sacrifice, little human.”

His words weigh awfully heavy while you shudder in his lap. His skin is like marble—shimmery and cold as his hands wrap around you, holding you tightly as he puts his lips to your neck.

"I'll take precious care of you..."

You feared he’d bite, but the kisses that commence feel no less like a collar being fastened snug around your throat. As well as his promise—like being sentenced to spend eternity right there, hand-fed under that awful smile on his face.

♡ GOJO SATORU masterlist ♡ JUJUTSU KAISEN masterlist

[capricornlevi]

Gojo with his s/o who went missing for MONTHS, but comes backs somehow?

(Bonus: he thought that s/o was dead ;-;)

ten years previously

"Promise me you won't be too mad when I die."

Satoru furrows his brow when he hears you, tilting his head to the side to look at you funny.

You're both sprawled out on the grass, lying flat on your backs and gazing at the blue skies shining over Jujutsu Tech. Outside the school grounds, mountains line the perimeter like battlements, but you don't feel locked away. You feel at peace with everything: your choices, your circumstances, the company you've kept. The warm summer air wraps around you like an embrace.

What once seemed so alien to you, so frightening, is now your reality. It doesn't scare you as much anymore.

You're shoulder-to-shoulder with Satoru, laying about on the soft grass, not caring if your uniform gets wrinkled as you roll over to your side, propping your head against your elbow and meeting his gaze.

You've both ditched Yaga's class to hang out in the training field, and the sounds of the second-years laughing from the nearby dorms are the only noises you can hear apart from the distant chirping of birds.

That is, until Satoru objects indignantly:

"What are you talking about?"

You smile, not wanting to spoil the otherwise peaceful day. You hadn't brought it up to be negative, but it had to be said; if you don't do it now, you'll never get the courage to do so.

"You know what I mean. You are my best friend in the entire world, and you know that I am not going to last as long out there as you will -- on missions, fighting."

Somewhat irritated, Satoru reaches a hand up to flick you on the nose. You swat him away, laughing, which makes him crack a smile.

"Our last day before graduation, and you want to focus on this morbid shit?" he asks, his tone light and jokey but with an undertone of seriousness that only you ever recognise.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not planning on giving up," you elaborate, distractedly picking a nearby daisy. You don't touch the petals, twirling it by its stem so that it spins in your fingers. "I'll give it my all for as long as I can, but I'm just saying ... don't expect me to be fighting by your side when you're one of the ninety-year-old elders."

"If I turn out like them, then I'll need you around so you can shoot me."

You make a sound that's half-scoff, half-laugh. "I'm being serious."

"So am I," he says, eyes fixed on yours. "Completely serious. You've excelled at every test. We couldn't have won the goodwill event without you. You've completed dozens of missions by now, missions that even I found tricky. What's bringing this on now?"

You shrug, still peering down at the flower in between your thumb and index finger. "Just a feeling, I guess."

"A feeling?"

You hum in the affirmative, and Satoru sighs.

"Want to know my reply, then?" he retorts, still quite serious.

Your head snaps back up at that.

Satoru sits up, cross-legged, scanning your face as though he's committing it to memory. Then, he carefully plucks the daisy from your hand and tucks it behind your ear.

"If you die, I'll be well and truly pissed."

---

The only part of that mission that Satoru really, truly recollects, the only crystal-clear memory in an otherwise blurry mess, was the feeling of Yaga's hand on his shoulder when he arrived at the gates of Jujutsu Tech.

Alone. He arrived back alone, for the first time ever. Three years after graduation and he'd never even had a close call, much less return in this state, and without you.

The whole experience felt so strange, for lack of better word. It felt like it was happening to someone else.

He had explained what had happened, the words leaving his mouth without much thought on his part. His voice sounded cold, detached, unrecognisable.

"And it took her," is how he finished speaking, he's pretty sure. Again, the details are hazy. He doesn't think that he bothered telling Yaga that he tried everything he could out there. That he pushed himself until he nearly broke. That he tried, at the end, to put himself in the curse's reach, to step into harm's way if it meant you got even five minutes more in this world.

Yaga already knows all that.

Thankfully, his former teacher doesn't waste time with empty words of condolence. He just rests a hand on Satoru's shoulder, the gesture doing more than any speech could.

It's not enough, though. Nothing ever would be.

---

Satoru prides himself on compartmentalisation. He has to do it to survive, he'll drown otherwise, and luckily, he's quite good at it. When Yuji asks him if he's ever lost someone to a curse, eyes wide with concern, he's able to wave off the boy's worries. He says yes, sadly, he's lost people, but that it's part of life, and that the only way to deal with it is to get stronger.

He doesn't sugarcoat it, but Yuji wasn't expecting him to. The boy just nods and continues his training. Satoru, meanwhile, resumes his meandering around the classroom, whistling along to some song that's been stuck in his head.

The only person you can control is yourself. Everything else just ... happens.

That's the closest thing he has to a personal philosophy, and it's a pretty foolproof one, having gotten him through some of the bleakest, emptiest years of his life.

He's done well for himself, considering. He's not as brash and impulsive as he was when he was younger. He's dedicated his life to preparing young sorcerers for the world out there, trying to keep them safe as long as he can. He lives a comfortable life and keeps himself entertained but focused, constantly motivated to keep moving forward.

Truthfully, the only time his worldview comes close to being threatened is when he sees a patch of daisies growing in the grass.

Whether out walking through the school grounds, or on a mission in the countryside, or on a faculty trip to the botanic gardens in the city, he's struck by them every so often. He tries to avert his eyes when he glimpses the tell-tale flash of yellow and white petals, but it's no use.

He doesn't break down. He doesn't even cry, not since that first night. He just feels the sensation creep up his chest, gripping his throat like a vice. It burns, sometimes, like someone's actually there choking him. When he breathes, it's more like a gasp for air.

That's why he's built that philosophy, see, because those moments, those flashes of emotion, are more painful than anything he's felt in his life. If that's even one percent of what the feeling must be like in its entirety, then it's best kept buried. To unleash it is to unravel, to be at the mercy of the world.

And the only thing he can control is himself.

---

This is the final night of a five-day-long exchange trip to Kyoto, and the students have earned some rest time. Satoru doesn't object to the girl's request, letting her leave to explore the souvenir store while Yuji and Megumi pick up their crepes from some touristy café down the street.

present day

"Gojo-sensei, can I pick up something from that store before we head back?" Nobara asks, lifting her hand to shield her eyes from the sun. "I won't be long."

Satoru hangs around as people mill past, hands in his pockets. The air is thick with heat and the smell of baked goods from nearby bakeries. Though it's well into the evening hours, the sun shows no sign of setting.

With nothing better to do, he resigns himself to people-watching. The fact that he's a head or so taller than most passers-by means he sees everything.

He spots an ageing businessman scolding his teenage son, gesturing furiously at a folded piece of paper -- a school report, maybe -- as the boy looks down at his feet while walking alongside him.

An elderly couple walking hand-in-hand.

Two friends bickering over summer holiday plans.

A group of ten or so tourists, trailing hopelessly behind their guide who is striding along the thoroughfare without looking back.

But then, suddenly, all the faces in the crowd blur into obscurity.

Noises cut off instantaneously.

He hears nothing, feels nothing.

For a moment, Satoru swears that time pauses, everyone suspended in freeze-frame while his brain tries to catch up with what he's seeing.

Who he's seeing.

You.

You're wearing sunglasses. You're dressed differently. You're a few years older than the last time he saw you, which only adds to his hope.

Even with these changes, he knows it's you. He'd know it was you even if he were surrounded by a million other faces.

His legs move before he can process anything else.

It doesn't take him long to catch up to you. As he reaches out to touch your shoulder, understandably, you jolt with surprise at the unexpected contact. Turning around to face him, you remove your headphones and relax a little when you realise that he's not a salesperson or pickpocket.

You push your sunglasses up to rest on your forehead, smiling politely.

Satoru waits. His eyes bore into yours, waiting for that sign of recognition, that epiphany to hit you when you realise that he's finally found you.

Nothing comes.

"Can I help you?" you ask, your tone amiable, if a little confused.

Satoru blinks slowly.

"What's your name?" he asks in response, though he knows it.

You respond with that same name he's had at the tip of his tongue all these years, but never let himself speak it aloud.

He doesn't give his own, suddenly unable to say that, either.

"Where did you go to school?" he queries finally, almost pleadingly.

Even more puzzled, you still try to maintain that aura of politeness. "In Tokyo. Why?" You hesitate, and he's just about to let himself breathe again before you exclaim;

"Oh! Did we have a class together?"

Satoru feels a crushing weight settle over him. Cold, unyielding dread floods his veins.

Panic.

He isn't dead, is he?

No. This can't be the afterlife, this can't be your reunion, because he can't imagine that a supposed paradise would be so cruel as to make you a stranger to him.

You, on the other hand, interpret his silence as answering your question.

"I'm so sorry, that's so rude of me!" you apologise, grimacing with embarrassment. "I really don't remember much from back then, I promise. I'm terrible with names. I'm sure you were lovely!"

Only then does Satoru notice something else: the change to your cursed energy, the way it barely registers as anything at all. It hangs over you like a rainy mist, grey and lifeless, completely different to the bright effervescence that used to follow you everywhere.

He realises a thousand things at once.

That curse, that creature that took you, didn't kill you. He's heard of this only a few times before, but what you encountered was a parasitic spirit, one that sustains its pathetic existence through the cursed energy of powerful sorcerers. They do this because of the potency of a sorcerer's energy, like an untapped well, particularly from someone as high-ranking as you were.

To achieve this, it has placed some amnesiac over you to stifle your abilities to fight back.

That ... thing, that spirit, that parasite, likely returns every so often to feed, and with it goes all memories of your life beforehand.

Satoru's first feeling upon this realisation is guilt. A strange feeling, but one he can't deny, because even though he understands what happened to you, you're none the wiser.

You're still standing there, groceries in hand, as the warm summer breeze washes over you both.

You're waiting for him to speak.

He doesn't. He can't.

"Well, it was lovely meeting you again!" you pipe up cordially, pushing your sunglasses back into place with a flick of your finger. You turn around and call out over your shoulder, "I'm sure I'll see you around!"

Satoru stays there, frozen, and makes a decision there and then.

A new philosophy. A new promise.

He is going to do whatever he can to give you back your life.

You can do whatever you want with it -- maybe you won't forgive him for not saving you, maybe you'll carry on with this existence in Kyoto, maybe you'll go back to sorcery and pretend this never happened.

But it's your choice. The least he can do is ensure you get the chance the make it.

---

"You know it doesn't always work out the way you want it to," Shoko says with more sympathy than he's ever heard from her before. She stands with her back to the stone wall, looking at him sadly. The school buildings loom behind them both, everyone inside asleep. It's so quiet out here that it feels almost unnatural, foreboding.

Satoru has spent months working on this mission, forsaking all other tasks in preparation to exorcise this curse that's robbed you of so much. Tonight, with hours before he leaves for Kyoto, he is asking Shoko his only remaining question.

He's already worked out when the spirit is likely to return to feed. He's figured out a plan to kill it. He is even certain that he can do all of this while keeping you out of further harm's way.

There's really only one question that he has left for his friend, and that is what might happen afterwards.

She's never seen something like this before, she warned him, only ever heard about it from others. It's all word of mouth, no medical texts or written histories. And it's most definitely not a given that all of your memories will return. You'll be lucky if you regain any of the cursed energy you've lost.

That's enough, he figures, to give you a fighting chance. If he was in this position, he'd want the same to be done for him.

"I know," he finally answers Shoko, watching as she exhales from her cigarette into the dark night air. "But it's not just about what I want."

"You can live with it?" she asks with a quiet concern. "With being a stranger, maybe forever?"

He doesn't have to think over his reply.

"I can live with it."

Shoko nods. She puts out her cigarette against the wall, flicks it away, and they head back inside.

---

As strong as he knows he is, Satoru is surprised yet again by the strength of that spirit, how desperately it wants to keep draining life from others.

It's a messy fight. The creature recognises him, almost gleeful at his arrival. It glances up at your apartment overhead, with you sleeping inside, completely unaware of their presence on the street below. Then, the curse looks back at Satoru with a grin that fills him with a fury that burns a hole in his chest.

He is filled with a sensation that feels alien to him, completely unfamiliar, an all-encompassing feeling that he can't attempt to put into words.

As he strikes the curse over and over and over, watching as the hits land, watching it get gravely wounded, none of it does anything to alleviate that feeling.

He kills it, eventually. It dies somewhat pitifully in a puddle of its own cursed energy, spitting out angry hisses until it grows quiet.

Nothing changes then. Satoru feels no shift in the air, no disturbance. He's shielded from civilians so he expected a degree of quietness, but he hears nothing, absolutely nothing, not even the rain falling around him.

Everything else is still.

He feels exhausted in every way. Physically, emotionally, he's spent, having unleashed not only his rage on that spirit, but every iota of pain and fear he's been slowly amassing since their first encounter, since it tore you away and left him untethered.

That feeling is not gone, though. He's not sure it ever will be. But he's identified it, and somehow, that does something to soothe him.

Then, the quietness is interrupted by the sound of a window opening a few floors above.

He glances up in time to see you shout down at him.

"Satoru!"

He closes his eyes. The sound of his own name pours down on him like sunlight.

He feels it all; the recognition in your voice, the relief.

By the time he opens his eyes again, you're down on the street in your pyjamas and slippers, throwing yourself into his arms.

He wraps them around you as tight as he can without causing you any pain, lifting you up and keeping you so close to his chest that you can hear his heart beating.

He can feel your tears seep into the fabric of his shirt and rests a hand on the back of your head, desperate to carry out any gesture to bring you comfort.

You kiss him, then. You kiss his lips, his face, his neck, you cup his face in your hands and feel him lean into the touch.

Eventually, after a perfect eternity in this embrace, you pull apart.

"Were you pissed?" you ask, laughing as you say the words, tear lines still streaking your face but your eyes bright and full of life. "Back then, you said you would be."

"Yes, but not at you," he answers with a smile, and that makes you cry again, good tears, proud tears.

It will take a while for things to get back to normal, he knows that. There's still a lot he can't control. But if he hadn't tried, if he had given up and surrendered to circumstance, you wouldn't be here in front of him, smiling, glowing, looking up at him with beautiful recognition.

That's enough for a new philosophy.

[crushedsweets]

Which songs would you pick as theme music for each of the Creeps?

i'm picking songs from MY daily playlist, which is mostly indie love songs - so these arent entirely accurate, but i think it forces a unique perspective (and im far too lazy to perfectly curate a song per character)

TIM is fast car by tracy chapman; "maybe together we can get somewhere; any place is better; you and i can both get jobs; and finally see what it means to be living"

BRIAN is 4runner by brenn; "i see you're still doing the same old; hanging out with people like me; you know i'm trying to get a little bolder; so, this town is where i'd rather you be"

TOBY is king for a day by piece the veil; "won't you push me for the last time; you want a martyr? i'll be one; now i dont want to feel a thing anymore; im tired of begging for the things that i want; im over sleeping like a dog on the floor; imagine living like a king someday"

KATE is hammer by hana vu; "are we gonna make it? cause i have to; i don't wanna be here but i do; and i run away cause i ruined mine; and i fall asleep cause i get so tired; and its hard to say what the trouble is; ill run away til its all behind"

NINA is cologne by beabadoobee; "at least leave the scent of your cologne; i'm not done yet; please, kiss my neck; lets go for another round; i hate what this song is about; am i attractive? tell me, am i good enough? lately i've been on an off; i think ive hurt too much; think i'm gong to explode"

CLOCKY is tell me its okay/im not angry anymore by paramore; "maybe its been years since i genuinely smiled; and maybe its been years since i wanted to be apart of anything, but lately i've been good, you know, i've actually been great; man, i even laughed a little today, oh so strange"

JACK is the dead coming talking by roe kapara; "feel the worms eating holes through my mind; light regrets that'll kill me in time; walking backwards is always a guess; distance faces burn holes in my chest"

LAZARI is my mother wants me dead by carolesdaughter; "nobody can say they know me; i know my mother wants me dead; i cant trust you, i know you bleed blue"

BEN is hot rod by dayglow; "my memory is not like the other one; maybe i'm not all that you thought; we don't move like we used to do; maybe you're not such a hot rod"

SALLY is oysters in my pocket by royel otis; "oysters in the pocket; not that we are selfish; we just haven't learnt much; send me on my bicycle; the chain is all rust"

JANE is lucerene by richy mitch & the coal miners; "i fervently want some time alone; no wine, no elixir, no spirits can make me whole; i say it with pain; i don't know if im in the right yet; still some burnt blood remains"

JEFF is scrawny by wallows; "still wear the same shoes i did back then; i dont think theyve ever been untied; dont care to watch the story unfold; hate feeling like im not in control; now tell me im a scrawny mother fucker with a cool hairstyle"

LIU is didya think by arlie; "never thought you'd be the kinda guy to get a day job; never thought you'd be the kinda guy to take a safe route; so why ya sittin around? did ya think it'd be easy?"

DINA is my bodys made of crushed little stars by mitski; "im not doing anything; my bodys made of crushed little stars; would you kill me, jerusalem? i should tell them im not afraid to die"

ANN is baby you're a haunted house by gerard way; "better find another superstition; your heart will stay forever; when your last remains are few; ill be the ghost inside your head when we are through; sometimes you scare me; and i'll find a way to scare you too"

LULU is stella brown by jelani aryeh; "i don't know what to talk about; how has my head just hollowed out? spend my time awaiting, lying; patient inside this racing mind; i'm too precautious and i often doubt"

[dreamlandcreations]

Knowledge and Power (I)

Darth Maul x Queen of Naboo!Reader

Summary: Maul is afraid that he is not strong enough...

Warnings: angst, nightmares/visions/past and possible future trauma, enemies to lovers, implied smut (naked in bed together), hurt/comfort, fluff, paraphrasing the "Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That's the only way to become what you were meant to be." quote, ?implied? plotting murder, reader description (long hair), some soulmate-ish/dyad-like stuff at the end, not proofread so probably a mess 🙈

Started for the Sith/Jedi secrets prompt but I guess it works with Death of the self too

A sequel of last year's @maulweek fic, Beauty and the Beast

~ 1,3 K words

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Maul was having another nightmare. There were not many tells but you know him by now. He usually sleeps eerily still, his breathing so calm and hearts so slow that you used to (and sometimes still do) have to check if he was alive when you woke up in the middle of the night, not used to having someone sleep next to you.

The nightmares were getting more and more frequent, and if you were correct, increasingly upsetting too. He refused to tell you about them though. That was about to change tonight!

You shake him awake as gently as you can but still find yourself pinned beneath him but instead of the night's previous loving embrace, he grabs you by your throat, ready to get rid of the threat.

It only takes a second or two for him to realise what's happening but it's enough to cause damage in the already fragile bond between you. He rips himself away so fast you can hardly follow, only barely reaching him before he could leave the bed.

You pull him back on you slowly, knowing that the skin to skin contact will help ground him after whatever he had seen. After a little hesitation, he nuzzles into your neck while pulling you impossibly close, holding you tightly with slightly trembling hands as his breathing starts to even out while you caress him ever so gently.

Lately he has been training you and your handmaidens, relentlessly trying to increase his own power too in his freetime. Something was clearly bothering him and instead of turning to you, he started to drift away, like he was preparing to leave.

"You are not alone. Please, tell me what's wrong," you murmur into his ear, and sigh when you feel him tense up again. "Even if I can't help, it could take some of the weight off you if you would just share."

He leans back on his elbows to look into your eyes, contemplating your words for a long minute before finally speaking. "If I tell you, it will put you in even more danger."

"While not knowing will keep me safe?" You question him with a disapproving frown.

Maul leans on his side, holding his weight on one arm so he can cup your face before he steals a kiss, lingering for a long moment then he parts and answers as he keeps brushing your cheek with his thumb.

"If there is a chance that he will spare you because I have not revealed his identity..."

"Is there a chance he would spare you?"He looks away instead of replying to your rather biting cut in, which is enough of an answer on its own. "I also made a promise to protect you, if you think I'll let..."

He turns back to you sharply, his intense gaze no longer dull yellow light in the dark but glowing flames of almost completely red as he practically growls, "I can't lose you."

Silence. Pain. Paralyzing helplessness. Does he truly think you feel any different about him?

You can hardly breathe as you plead, "Tell me what you dream about."

You almost think he will shut you down again but whatever he sees or feels has him give in, only a little though.

"It is not always the same." He starts, pausing to think just how much to tell you but you don't interrupt or demand more, just patiently wait for him.

The truth is, that it is always the same in terms of how it ends. With death. Only he can't tell you that. So he opens with something less ominous but you quickly connect the dots.

"You will have to go to Coruscant soon."

He is there, you think. The mysterious master who is a threat to you both, no matter how much Maul tries to deny it.

"What if we don't go?" you contemplate your options out loud.

"He will come here."

At that statement your brain races with the pieces of this infuriating puzzle that you already gathered. And then it strucks you. Of course! It has to be...

"No, no, no!" Maul gets up and paces in panic. It is unlike anything you have seen from him so far.

"I killed you! I just killed you!" he chants in desperate cries as you hug your blanket and hurry to him.

"Look at me!" you demand as you grab his arm and turn him to face you. His face kept in place between your palms, letting your covers go while forcing him to do as you said, you try to sound soothing as you weakly attempt to reassure you both, "I'm here. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. And neither are you!"

He breathes out a shaky breath and carefully rests his forehead against yours.

"I am not strong enough to protect you," he whispers in defeat.

"You don't have to fight him alone." You remind him as you circle your arms behind his neck, holding him tightly as you keep murmuring, "You are not alone. I'm here."

Once he calmed down a little, you pull him back to bed, letting him get lost in the touch of you again as you aimlessly caress each other. He unties your braid, spreading your hair on the pillows like a halo and plays with a strand as he tries to stay with you in the moment.

"Love, forming bonds of commitment... It is not something either side embraces, right?" He pulls back and looks confused at your seemingly sudden change of topic but confirms your theory so you go on. "It seems to me that you limit yourself to what he taught you about the Force and that is not even half of the things you could study if something is missing on both sides. Wouldn't you agree?"

He doesn't answer but you know he is thinking about it, you can also tell he is not convinced, at all.

You sit up, making him move as well. Keeping the remaining covers to your chest with one hand, you grip his jaw in your other hand as you anger starts to show. "He is the past, don't let that define you! He can't have you! If he has to die so you'll be completely free of this torment then he will die."

"How?" he growls at you impatiently, like you are talking nonsense.

In response you lean in and nip at his lower lip before sliding away and reaching under the bed.

"I was going to give you this tomorrow."

"What is this?" He looks almost adorable as he eyes the package. Turning it around this way and that way like it is a foreign concept.

"A gift," you huff. "Open it!"

He does and... there's no reaction. Literally, nothing. He stares at the ancient books with a strange expression and says nothing, so you start to explain why you thought to acquire them in the first place.

"I hardly doubt he knows about the Jedi ways, maybe you can find something useful in there. Perhaps it will give you a new perspective, maybe even help to find your own path.

With that, the last barriers that he was adamant to keep up had crumbled between you, his soul wide open for you, connecting the two of you through the Force as it was meant to be.

You gasp at the feeling but you don't have time to question him, Maul surges forward, grabbing you by your nape and capturing your lips in a kiss, devouring you with a hunger even more intense than usual.

That night was the true end of Darth Maul, for he was no longer a Sith apprentice in any way. He was on a new path, going into blindly to fully explore the world and the Force anew. He will never let anyone else define his fate from now on, he vowed. Although he still had doubts, he was no longer afraid of the future because he knew you would be with him, always.

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[lanaroff]

Unwanted- Part 5

Paring: Wanda Maximoff x Reader

Summary: Y/N is an enhanced SHIELD agent who is forced to work with the Avengers. What happens when they discover that she’s not alone?

A/N: I actually don't know where this series is going. But I have so many ideas. Feels good to be back!

"So how does it work?" Peter asked while he was playing with his fingers looking around.

"How does what works?" You confusingly asked without taking your eyes off the road.

"The thing with the alien, you know V..."He stared saying. However, he was cut by the sound of the breaks stopping abruptly the car.

"Don't" You said sighting. "Don't say it's name when I'm driving. We trained it to come out at the mention of its name. You don't want to see it crashing the car, do you?"

The young boys eyes were full of both wonder and fear. You didn't own him an explanation about why the name should not be mentioned under certain circumstances, but you knew what kind of kid he was, and how talkative he could be.

"Sorry, Miss Y/L/N. I didn't know." He said it with an apologetic look on his face.

The ride back to your apartment was normal. You were aware that he was late for school, and probably would end up in detention for it. But you both agreed to go to your apartment first if he could go on the passenger seat right next to yours.

After a long, long, long trip, where Peter talked about his suit, his friends, his projects, how cool Stark was, and how cool working with the Avengers was, you finally made it out to your apartment. Sure, the trip wasn't thaaat long, but to you it felt like ages.

"Wait here, I'll be right back." You said as you walked inside your apartment.

You enter your office looking for your safe box. You knew that maybe leaving important files was not the best thing, so you were more than in a hurry to find them. Once you stood in front of the box, you entered the password and opened it. As you took your files, you heard steps coming from your living room. Immediately you turn to Venom and prepare yourself in case you needed to kill someone.

However, the moment you stood foot in the other room, a loud sound stunned you, and suddenly the feared creature was no longer in control. Turning yourself back, you dropped to your knees and cried the pain in your head. You were fighting to keep yourself conscious; you couldn't give up. As you were about to stand on your feet, someone pushed you back to the floor.

"You know, we were expecting it to be more difficult. I guess you are just weak." A man that stood in front of you stared saying. "You are a hard fish to catch, let me give you that."

"Go. Fuck. Yourself." You said between groans. Your head was killing you, but your mind was too busy thinking about how to get out of there.

"Oh yeah, I will. After I get paid for delivering you to the boss." He said between laughs.

How did these people knew about Venom's weakness? Only you and some man at SHIELD knew about it, as it was supposed to be confidential information. Only you, Fury, Natasha, Hill, and...

"Rumblow." You said, looking straight into the man's eyes.

As you waited for the main man to give you any kind of confirmation that in deed it was Rumlow behind it, another man came into the room.

"Sir, we found a kid trying to enter the apartment. What do we do with him?" He said as a brunette man followed him with a sacred Peter Parker.

Peter's head was being held by the man's arm, and a gun was being pressed on his skull. You immediately tried to stand on your two feet; however, your body betrayed you, making you fall once again.

"Kill him." He said, as he saw your reaction upon seeing Peter being held. You could let the kid die; otherwise, you were dead. They will never forget you if Peter dies. How would Wanda look at you after realizing that it was your fault?

"NO!" You screamed as you finally pulled your body out of the ground to tackle the man standing in front of you. "PETER RUN NOW!"

And he did as you said. Peter quickly used his strength to pull himself out of the man's arms to run towards you. Immediately you stood up and grabbed Peter so he was behind you.

"Listen to me carefully, Peter. I'm going to need you to run as fast as you can. Did you hear me?" You said it without taking your eyes off the intruders.

"But Miss..."

"No. They can't know what you are capable of doing. Now do what I say and leave. Don't look back; don't come to get me; just run and find Stark." You finished whispering so only he could listen to what you were saying.

The truth was that you knew that Peter could take them down. But if these people wanted to take you to where Rumblow was, then you were more than eager to let yourself be taken.

With a nod that confirmed you that he understood his assignment, Peter ran as fast as he could towards the living room window. Guns were fired at him while you stopped one of Rumblow's men to follow him. As soon as he reached the window, he jumped, and you were once again on the living floor in pain. But relived knowing that he was no longer there.

"You bitch! You are going to regret that" Was the last thing that you heard as you were hit with the back of a gun, leaving you unconscious.

You woke up really hot. And not in the nice way. Your body felt as if you were on fire, as in you were being burned from the inside to the outside. The moment you opened your eyes, you saw yourself chained to a stretcher, and the heat came from right underneath it.

"Rise and shine." You heard a voice saying. Immediately you clench your jaw as you recognize who's voice was.

"You know, you should've told me that you had a sunbed. I would've wore my bikini." You said spitting his face.

"Keep that attitude, and you know how it will end." Romblow said wapping his face.

"I'm counting on it, dumbass." You said with a big smile on your face.

The truth was, you loved it. Not the burning pain that you were feeling. But being so close to Rublow. Knowing that he actually was scared. Because boy, you had all the time in the world, but he? He knew the clock was ticking and that he had a few hours before S.H.I.E.L.D. would know your location.

"I could kill you right here right now." The man in front of you said grabing you by the hair.

"I know, but she won't allow you, will she? You are scared of her, I can see it." You replied.

"You are right. But that's the thing. I'm not going to kill you. Nah!" He said as he walked next to a table full of surgical instruments. "I'm going to destroy every hope you have of taking down Hydra." He grabbed a scalpel with one hand and, with the other, grabbed the back of your head. "I'm going to kill your new friends, so you have no one." He said while pressing the blade down your head hard enough to make you bleed but not enough to cut you too deep. "And after that, I'm going to free it, and then they will see you as their threat. And when you realize that you are alone and hopeless, then I will take you to HER. She can't wait to see you and continue with the work she started. You will be all hers!"

"Fuck you!" Was all you dared to say. You couldn't go back to her. You had come so far to be back at that place. Sure, you hated S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avangers, but deep down you knew that they were the only path to revenge. You needed them; you needed Venom. And he knew it.

"Bring Dr. Ackermann. Now!" Romblow said to one of his soldiers.

Back at the compound, the things were not better. Peter had come burst through the door screaming for help, alarming the whole team.

"Hey kid, slow down, what happened?" Tony asked him.

"It's... um... It's miss Y/L/N... We were at her place, and some guys came over, and they... um, they took her. She is gone." He said

The team shared the same worrying expression. You were supposed to take Peter to school; how could something like that happen? But most important, who would do something like that?

"What do you mean she is gone Peter?" Natasha asked.

"They had this device that was emitting some sound that hurt her. And she couldn't move. She asked me to come to you guys. We need to help her." Peter said. Upon hearing what Peter said, Natasha sent him with Bruce to the medbay to see if he had any injuries.

"You know something, don't you?" Wanda asked the spy. She knew something bad had happened. Maybe something related to your hatred thowars Hydra? She didn't know. All she knew was that she had to help you, just like you did with her.

"Y/N has a bomb in her head." Natasha said. The team were left speechless. Wanda couldn't comprehend why. Why would you have that on you? You were not a bad person; she was sure of that. You just needed someone to take care of you. Why would someone put that device on your head?

"What do you mean?" Tony asked.

"When S.H.I.E.L.D. got their hands on Y/N, she was unstable. She couldn't control Venom, in fact, it controlled her. So Fury decided that the best thing to do was to build a device that could control Venom, since she couldn't do it. It turns out that loud sounds and fire are one of it's weaknesses. They built a device that emits piercing sounds straight to her brain." Natasha explained.

Inmediatly, Wanda understood the events of the first night that she encountered the alien. That ringing noise that she heard, the way you twisted in pain, how Venom froze. You were just trying to protect her, and in doing so, you were hurting yourself.

"Okay, and what does this have to do with the bomb?" Bucky asked.

"One time while we were training, she lost control of her body to Venom. It was a disaster; four agents died that day. Venom just tear them apart. So she asked Fury to put a bomb in her head, so if she ever loses control again, she will eliminate Venom before it harms anyone."

"And by that, you mean that'she will eliminate herself'?". Sam asked. As soon as those words left Sam's mouth, Wanda had to leave the room. She just felt like it was too much for her. She felt nauseous.

She had to get out of there.

Wanda run to your room. It was the first time since the incident that she actually got to see it. It was almost empty. There was nothing that really reminded her of you. And that showed her how little she knew you. When she first came to the Avengers Towel, she felt lost. She had just lost Pietro, and she was all alone. Like you. You both had lost so much. She was determined to help you. She wanted to help you. Who knows, maybe one day you two could grow up and be friends, she thought. All she knew was that she couldn't leave you like that.

She came back to where she had left her teamates with another set of thoughts. "What's the plan?" Wanda said.

"I just talked to Fury; he has her location. She has a tracker, just in case something like this happens" Natasha said.

"Alright team, suit up." Said Steve.

[yaoireview]

review sockathan ! 👻👻👻

woah how'd you make that green

SOCKATHAN YAOI REVIEW

Disclaimer: This will contain spoilers (kind of) for Welcome to Hell 2 Part 1 and Welcome to Hell. You should probably go watch that. Its made by Erica Wester and its PRETTY cool.)

My Yaoi Entrepreneurs, I'll be blunt with you. I know we've ALL seen gay people, maybe in the streets, maybe at the park. You might even see one in your home now, so lets be honest with ourselves. Sock is DEFINITELY gay, bisexual at LEAST.

The OTHER one on the other hand.. its a little bit harder to say.. I'll probably find something though..

Lets make one thing clear, when I say Yaoi in this review. I don't mean ANYTHING inappropriate. Its just my special way of saying gay people.. I'm kinda magical in that sense.

Lets just get the first one done and over with a simple section I like to call:

EVIDENCE 1: SOCK IN GENERAL

okay so FIRST of all the FIRST time we see sock, they call Jonathan "hot stuff" while being in a fridge. I'm not sure about you but that's love if I ever saw it.

After that they introduce you to Sock killing his parents. One key point after another. If Sock being gay wasn't important, then WHY was it shown BEFORE telling us Sock's (other) main trait. Checkmate liberals.

Sock would then get the report from Mephistopheles, and you COULD say its just because the camera zoomed in, but its literally the most light ever seen in Sock's eyes.

And then Sock went on to ruin Jonathan's day, making him look crazy, and Jonathan SOMEHOW got blamed for knocking down that desk, I swear I think the teachers just hate him. I'm not sure about you but I certainly cant KNOCK over a desk thats right next to me.

He was WRITING too.. would a guilty man of desk flipping WRITE?? NO!!

And not to mention that Sock made Jonathan look DUMB in front of the faceless brothers which was probably the closest time that Sock did their job right.

Sock absolutely ruined it today.. but can you blame them? They're new to the job, give them some SLACK.

But the upcoming days, Sock was so whimsical.

Yeah SURE. Sock is still telling Jonathan to kill himself, but they just don't want to get fired!!

Not to mention the fact that they stared at Jonathan while they were taking a piss, but there's nothing odd about that.

And also near the end, Mephistopheles calls sock out on liking the guy, and Sock stutters. You just have to take my word for it.

SOCK IN GENERAL 2 [PART 1]

If you saw Welcome to Hell 2 [Part 1], you already know what I'm gonna comment about. Sock went on to call Jonathan's mother, hot. They then went on to say "Must be where you got it from, huh? You definitely got her butt at least."

When Jonathan goes on a walk and Sock follows them and says after Jonathan says he doesn't wanna be friends with them. (We'll get back to that)

"Oh wow, come to think of it, You don't really have ANYONE do YOU? What's that feel like? Knowing you're gonna die alone." to which Jonathan snaps back with "I dunno Sock, you tell me."

Now at first, this looks like a scene of ANTI SOCKATHAN propaganda, but think with me here, yaoiers. How would Jonathan know that Sock died alone??

I understand if he just guessed, since sock DOES look like someone who would die alone, or he just said whatever comeback that came to his head but if not, Sock ALREADY told Jonathan about their past life.

If what I KNOW is true, Sock VENTED to Jonathan about their life before they died in LESS than a week, since Sock just now sees Jonathan's mother in the first part, and due to a comment made by the creator.

Sock REALLY trusts this guy, maybe Mephistopheles didn't want to hear them vent, but maybe its JUST because Sock wanted Jonathan to do the same. but they probably didn't.

And then near the end, Sock says to Jonathan when he snatched his employee manual

"Jonathan, if something happens to you-"

Actually, I think this is pretty weak evidence but I thought I'd include it, since a teacher would say the same thing if a kindergartener was up on a high shelf.

That segment was PRETTY lengthy, but I PROMISE you, the others will be shorter, I just.. didn't expect there to be so much for Sock...

EVIDENCE 2: SOCK SUCKS AT THEIR JOB.

Jonathan was DEAD ON when they told Sock that they suck at their job. And quite honestly.. I could've done it better.. I could've got Jonathan to kill himself (theoretically) on the FIRST day, and if you wouldn't use my strategy, I promise you that there's probably several other you could use for the teenager that you want them to kill themselves at home.

STEP 1: GRAB A WEAPON

Since Sock is seen to be able to flip over a desk and they're able to HOLD Jonathan's journal (Shock or not), I should THEORITCALLY be able to grab a weapon, now for this strategy, I suggest you pick a nonlethal option, only to have a lethal option around, for this example, I will be using a sledgehammer.

After swinging that at the noggin, Jonathan would drop unconscious, probably with brain damage (that don't matter though)

STEP 2: POSSESS THE TEENAGER

Now it MAY not be like this in w2h, but Mephistopheles was able to possess Jonathan when he was DEAD (Probably), so It should hopefully work when they're out of consciousness.

STEP 3: KILL YOURSELF.

Alright now I KNOW that sounds bad.. but it wouldn't be MY hands to kill him. Grab the nearby lethal and SHOOT. THAT. TEENAGER!! Your boss may not agree with the logistics of this, but you get the job done.

This simulation was to PROVE that Sock atleast CARES a bit about Jonathan to want to get to know him. and to not kill him on the spot. Now if It was the other way around.. I'm not exactly sure..

EVIDENCE 3: JONATHAN KINDA HATES SOCK

(he looks like hes standing up to a school bully)

At the beginning of Welcome to Hell, hes clearly annoyed and STILL is annoyed by some of Sock's actions by the end, but he atleast isn't mad enough to NOT act like he could put up with Sock. I think the closest thing to gayness from Jonathan was when he moved the backpack for Sock to sit down.

In Welcome to Hell 2, he IS PISSED at this guy, and honestly, if Sock kept on knocking down those desks, i CANT blame him..

Maybe Sock kinda ruined the vibe when they expressed their love for Jonathan's mother, its hard to say really..

Jonathan makes this very clear that he DOESN'T even wanna be Sock's friend, I mean HAVE YOU HEARD THE THEME SONG?

SUMMARY:

Sock wasn't able to win Jonathan's heart, making him tonight's biggest loser.

YAOI: 6.5/10

[honeygem]

Stockholm Syndrome - Choose your Own Ending

Contains: dead dove: do not eat, smut, hired gunman, cnc, a change of heart, attempted murder/suicide, choking, unspecified character, undetailed/inaccurate venture to the dark web, slow burn, y/n has a specified descriptions but still generalized, mentions of various sex toys, kissing, safe word use, Stockholm syndrome,

a/n: unhealthy coping mechanism, this is purely self indulgent(heavy on self indulgent); I am back in the same building again?!

Dottore, William Afton, Hayakawa Aki, Childe, Capitano, Pierro, Barou Shouei, Michael Kaiser, Oliver Aiku, Itto, Dang Heng, Blade, Nicholas D. Wolfwood, Million Knives, Taiju Shiba, Jing Yuan, Denji, Beam, Scaramouche, Ran Haitani, Rin Haitani, Gojo, Geto, Sukuna, Toji, Kisaki Tetta,

I've thought about this for a long time.

I've always had thoughts about it, on and off, yet I never had the guts to actually do it. I know I could. However I've always hesitated thinking about what I'd leave behind.

What about mom? What about dad and his heart disease? My pet cat? What about my favourite books? Hobbies? Series? Will I ever finish them before my time runs out? Will I ever know their ending? What about my money I still haven't received from my friend, will she still give it back when I died?

Do I need to make an email for all my friends and family and have it sent days after I die? What should I say to them? I wanted to confess all my sins— my shortcomings, to my parents. Finally, I can let them down one last time by unleashing all these kept secrets and disappointments. By then, will they pity me for enduring this life for too long or will they resent me for tainting our family name and being a disgrace?

I sat in front of my computer, alone in my room with no other noise but the fan and dogs barking outside. It feels like time stopped at this moment. Like I could continue with my life without any consequences. However I knew time won't stop for anyone... and so does my thoughts.

Instinctively, like a flash if light, I typed in words I never expect to see appear on my computer history.

I did it... I entered the dark web.

I laughed to myself, almost insanely. This is getting too ridiculous, even for myself. Am I really not going to turn back now? Perhaps I could still close my computer and forget about this.

My body moved on its own, ignoring the warnings running inside my head. It felt like a dozen of red lights flashing inside my head signaling me to stop but I was blind and floored the gas pedal.

I searched desperately for something as if running out of time was part of the risk in doing what I needed to to; it was. I needed to finish this as soon without having anyone know or see it.

I needed it to be done quickly before I crumble down to myself once again and break down.

I managed to keep my mind shut from overthinking and stressing over the fact that this was too much for me. I couldn't afford distractions.

I've accumulated enough money to buy myself a hitman, set aside enough money for my funeral expenses, and enough money to support my family just in case they broke down once I'm gone; I hoped that they won't.

It's been months since I ventured in the dark web. Weeks have passed since I finished writing all the emails to be sent to my family and a few of my friends. Weeks have passed since I acquired a few more money to add to what I'll leave for my parents. And days have passed since I tried to finish everything in my bucket list except for two things.

During those days, I lived my life normallyas I did before. I spent time with my family, bonded with my friends, and caught up with my favourite series to whatever I can catch up to with my limited time. It was as if what happened a few months ago didn't happen.

It felt like a fever dream... but I knew it was real.

This was all a facade. A play to perform until it was the end of the show.

Today's the day, I guess. Or maybe not. I had completely forgotten. How could I ever forget about it? Nevermind, at least I finished what I needed to do.

I had planned to go out today and luckily I didn't have any errands to run. I had made sure to clean the house before I left and gave my mom a goodbye and an 'I love you', a habit I developed these past few months. At first it felt weird but it gave off some sort of relief and goodness in me. I smiled when I heard my mom say it back before I left.

At this point, I can feel myself close to crying... even when I've done this multiple times, gaslighted myself it was for the better, I still felt unsure and scared as I walk along my chosen path.

Maybe I wasn't meant to do this....

It had gotten very late and I still wasn't at home. I've destroyed my phone completely and disposed it somewhere. I assumed that my parents are now looking for me... desperately.

I had went inside the location an unknown messenger had sent me a few days ago. Room 44 of a motel miles away from home.

Perhaps the further I go from home would be better.

I've arrived at the designated room and no one was inside. The room was dimly lit with red highlights, flower petals and scented candles lit everywhere. It awfully gave a romantic vibe for a crime scene that was about to happen.

No one was present in the room but me so I closed the door and inhaled the scent coming from the candles. I wandered around the room and looked at the details further.

I inspected the bed a little closer and saw various sex toys displayed. Some were ropes, whips, paddle, and lots more. I even saw a spreader bar at the bottom of the bed, as well as a few more dildos and extra condoms in the box and other more stuff I don't recognize.

I don't really expect to use all of these in one night... I might not even last an hour.

"Oh, hey. You're here." A man came out of the bathroom.

Good ending, bad ending, deulon's ending Buy me a ko-fi?

[xxventiswindblumexx]

Hi there love! If you have time, could you write a Scaramouche x fem reader, where they hate each other so much, and then he fucks her till she can't speak anymore. W Dom Scara. Have a good day!

Of course! Trying to get back into writing after a long hiatus due to family and home issues!

Here's a hate fucking scara x fem reader NSFW!

Can't forget to tag my local scara simp @hitomisuzuya ❤

⚠WARNING:Hate fucking, harsh/rough love, scara being scara, breeding kink, pet kink⚠

It was late at night as the storm in Inazuma rolls, thunder strikes as the wrath of the Electro Archon could be felt in the air, even more so in the delusion factory where a certain harbinger resided. Scaramouche was appointed to watch over the factory, one of the very last things he wanted to be stuck with, maybe he should've been more.. friendly during the harbinger banquet, maybe then he couldn't gotten out of it, regardless he had a duty to uphold and another idea on his mind.

As the puppet thought he could hear the distant sound of fighting, great, the traveller Y/N arrived, how annoying. just what he needed, another annoyance, already had enough he had to work with the Doctor and Childe, now he must be rid of the traveller.

He waited for her to arrive to his domain, it was only a matter of time before she arrived and of course he would relish seeing her fall, but that's not what fate had in store for the two.

Y/N entered the room alone, she decided this was a fight even Paimon couldn't go with, a fight between her.. and the Balladeer.

"How dare you use people's lives for your profit!" she started, hand gripping her sword with nothing but vengeance for her dear friend. Scaramouche couldn't help but eat up the look, the anger, he loved it. wait.. loved it? no he can't get distracted.

"oh? did your pathetic friend die from it? must've been to weak.. like you" he laughed, only antagonizing the hero more, what he didn't expect was for her to attack already, coming at him with her sword he was able to grab her arm and deflect it, shoving her to the floor, he's much faster then her, with the power of electro he can move faster then she can blink. Once on the ground he stomped on her wrist making her drop the sword, hissing she clawed at his ankle but it was no use, he had her pinned.

His electric gaze sent shivers and strangely arousal through her as she gave him a scowl

"give up yet pest?" he hissed, arousal and anger was filling the air, "I can see you're ready to fight back and prove your worth" He continued his actions of stomping on her wrist again, "that means you have some backbone" he growled as Y/N struggled to get back into her feet

"What I have is not something I care to brag about" she said in return angerly, however when the two got close, scaramouche slamming her into the floor once more but this time holding her down with his hands, her legs on either side putting them in a situation, she could feel his hard on, something he tried to ignore, pathetic human emotions, he would say, but now its gotten him in a bind. "I wouldn't have guessed the Balladeer would get hard from this" she scowls causing his face to flush with both embarrassment and anger, but he couldn't deny the feeling, "or maybe I do know who you are, your true form" She snarls in disgust at him.

"And what might that be" he says with venom. Y/N smirks and sits herself straight up, she's getting more cocky now, and honestly it wasn't helping his already poor self control

"you're just a touch starved, horny angry man aren't you?" she remarks, snapping the last bit of restraint he had, growling he was determined to put this scum in her place

"I'll teach you to respect me, even if I have to break you over and over" he hissed beside her ear, biting harshly on her neck, his hips pushed forward causing her to gasp, a sharp moan leaving her throat as she squirmed in pleasure, she hated him and he hated her yet.. for that reason, they made each other stronger, the balladeers strength, their passion, they complemented and created each other.

Once started they knew they couldn't stop, his hands selfishly grabbing and pulling at her clothing, growls and groans filled the air as they moved around each other's bodies in a way they never thought possible. Her body was soft beneath his rough touches and gentle kisses, her breath coming in gasps and his lips on hers felt like heaven yet hell at the same time.

Once he pulled her clothing off he shoved her onto her stomach, taking control as the god he is, his cock throbbing against her wet pussy as he laughs at her submission, even if she was still struggling, he was the dominate one here, his tip flushed and leaking with precum as he pushed it against her entrance "fucking beg for me like the whore you are" he hissed, she resisted but she couldn't deny the throbbing need, weakly begging "please.. f-fuck! please just fuck me!" shamelessly begging before his thick cock slammed into her pussy, growling as his hands gripped her hips hard enough to cause his nails to scratch the skin, he thrusted hard and fast hitting her sweet spot, moaning loudly as her walls clenched around him, the feeling driving him insane. He pulled himself off from her slowly and threw away his discarded clothes, now fully naked he held her wrists above her head, assuming a new position before pressing his body onto hers, he thrusting hard and deep causing her to whimper, her pussy clenching around him as he mercilessly fucked into her, claiming her as his own.

"F-fuck! you're so damn tight, i-its like you want me to breed you don't you? " he hissed in a teasing tone, she groans as his hand tighten it's grip on her already sore wrists, his cock throbbed with need to release as she felt a knot began to tighten, causing her to cry out his name. He thrust harder until she cries with her orgasm, causing him to release his cum deep inside of her, she writhed under him, crying out in pain and pleasure as his cum filled her womb, his dick still buried within her pussy and balls.

"You're mine now little one, you belong to me and only me, " he murmured softly as she felt weak, he had almost forgotten his plan, nevertheless he had to make changes anyways, he can't just let her get in his way again.. maybe he can keep her as his pet.

[ashisill]

One time thing

Jake Kiszka x fem reader

Warnings: (drinking, smoking, sweetheart Jake, mentions of bad past relationship, pet names, drunk sex, unprotected sex, slapping, female ejaculation, choking, and I believe that’s all)

Been on a Jake kick at the moment so you can thank Mirador for this fic.

~

Its Friday night which means it’s time for Jake’s weekend routine. Bar, drinks, and women. His brothers have all found themselves a partner and have started to settle down. Jake? He’s not anywhere close to all that. He hasn’t even had a true girlfriend in years. ‘I’m a rolling stone’ is what he tells himself to feel better. He’s perfected the act of not catching feelings. There have been times where a near perfect girl has came along but when it got too serious he was gone. He’s not out to hurt anyone but don’t you dare get too attached to him. A heartbreaker if you will.

He says he doesn’t like to date but really he’s just scared of commitment. Although he’d rather die than admit to that simple fact. Its always the same he finds some lucky lady, takes her home for the time of her life, and makes sure she’s gone when he wakes up. Because if she isn’t he knows he’ll fall in love. It has got to be exhausting yet no matter what his brothers say he doesn’t plan on stopping. They beg and plead with him to at least go on a few dates. His brothers have went as far as trying to set him up with their friends. Except in the end Jake's still a loner. It drives his brother Josh absolutely crazy. He’s a lover and he just can’t understand why Jake chooses to live the way he does. He tries to forget about it but it gnaws at him until he finally snaps. As mad as Jake gets he understands he’s only trying to help. Josh just wants what’s best for him even if Jake doesn’t agree. He hates to see his brother’s heart get chipped away with every woman he discards. It’s a constant battle which only pulls them apart. Yet the weekend has rolled back around and there he sits at the same barstool.

He orders drink after drink and with a tolerance so high he’s hardly even buzzed. He looks through the crowd wondering who will strike his interest today. No luck.

There you come walking nervously into the bar. He’s already spotted you and is convinced you’re prettier than any girl he’s ever seen. With a freckled face, long straight hair, and a perfect smile. There’s an air in the bar tonight you think. It’s not like you to come here alone usually you’d bring a friend. Well if they didn’t ditch you to hang out with their boy toys. You pick at your fingers and take a seat at the bar. He thinks it must be meant to be because you’ve sat beside him. He listens as you order a beer and tries not to stare. Although he’s pleasantly surprised when you start the conversation. He’s thankful he doesn’t have to put up with the chase tonight. Usually he has to set through serval awkward silence or rejection until he finds his girl.

"Straight whiskey?" You say.

"That's the way to do it"

"I couldn't even get that half way down" you laugh.

"Wanna try it?" He teases.

"I'll stick with my beer. I'm Mia" you stick out a hand and he shakes it.

"Jake. Whatca doing here all by yourself?"

"My friends ditched me. What's your excuse?"

"Don't guess I have one. Drink here every weekend. Same spot"

"Alone?"

"Don't end up that way" he laughs.

"Cheers to that" you clink your drinks together.

You two didn’t budge all night. Never once did either of you run out of things to say. Which is a first for you and Jake. He’s funny and hasn’t failed to almost make you fall out of your seat laughing. You ask him all kinds of questions and he answers no matter how silly they are.

“Okay okay what’s the worst pick up line you’ve used and it worked?” You ask.

He laughs so hard he damn near snorts. “that’s a good one. So in high school my humor was incredibly dark. I was ‘edgy’ what can I say? Keep in mind I was trying to be an asshole. I was stoned like always and went to the most popular girl in school and said “are you a rope? Because I’d like to hang with you”. And she fucking bought it I had to take her on a date”

You both throw your heads back laughing and bang your fist on the bar. “No way! Your turn to ask me something”

"Mhm hottest guy ever go!"

"Val Kilmer in tombstone and John Travolta in Pulp Fiction!"

"I know you didn't just mention tombstone"

"It's my favorite hands down"

"You have no idea … I haven't clicked with anyone like this in a long time"

"That deserves a round" you wink.

You've sat there together for well past serval hours just talking. You were drunk off your ass but having a great time. He wasn't far from your level which gives him a boost of confidence. Well until your eyes peer to the dance floor that is.

"Jake we should dance!" You poke his arm.

"I don't dance Mia"

"Oh come on it will be fun"

You've taken his arm pulling him off the barstool. "Mia I'm serious. I have no rhythm"

"Oh please I'll teach you. You can’t be that bad”

"Mia-"

You start to love the way his voice sounds saying your name. You could get use to his company.

"I love this song!"

He's watching you move to the song. He can tell you know it well because you don't miss a beat.

"Dance Jake!"

He shrugs his shoulders at you. Rolling your eyes you take his hands. You move to the sound of the song and he tries to keep up "move your hips"

He does and soon his shoulders start to match the rhythm. “There you go!”

The more he loosens up the more fun he starts to have. He’s dancing almost better than yourself you think. “Where’d you learn those moves?” You tease.

“From my brother. He had a disco phase”

Like a stereotypical woman you poke out your lip with a “Awee”. He rolls his eyes playful and a giddy grin spread across his face. You and Jake danced to three up beat songs before the mood switched. “Now I’m really not good at this”

“Shh” you put a finger to his lips. You move his hands to rest on your hips and wrap around his neck. Laying your heavy head on his chest he start to sway. He takes the lead with baby steps. Sure enough in time he’s dancing you around the floor. Your drunken body becomes sleepy in the comfort of Jake’s cologne. You burrow into his neck in getting far too comfortable. Before you know it the song ends and he leads you off the dance floor. Walking back to the bar you stumble over your clumsy feet.

"Woah be careful there" you've almost fallen but his arm holds your waist steady.

"Take me home Jake"

"My place or yours?" He ask with a tilt of his head.

Your pointer finger pokes his chest. He smiles softly and kisses your forehead. He covers both your tabs and leads you out the bar.

"I'll call an Uber sit right here"

You sunk down on the concrete outside of the bar and play with the little pebbles that rested on the sidewalk. Humming a song you don't even know the name to. After he’s done he sits down beside you and sings the words softly. He lights a cigarette and offers you a hit. Which you take causing him to stare mesmerized as you softly blow out the smoke.

"This is the most fun l've had at the bar in forever"

"Me too Mia" a drunken smile lingers on his lips.

You lay your head on his shoulder, steal hits from his cig, and play with his finger gently. He can't help but laugh when you stick out his middle finger. When the Uber arrives he helps you to your seat. You start to doze off a little bit on the way home but woke quickly when you make it to his place.

"Got it?" He ask as you rise to your feet. You nod with a grin.

He's helping you as you stumble around. He's about as drunk as you are even though he tries to hide it. He fumbles with his keys you giggle finding humor in it. He's laughing as he thinks he opens the door. He doesn't and results in his head banging into the door. You laugh so hard your knees buckle and you fall to the ground. After what felt like forever he finally unlocks it and you both make your way inside.

"Welcome to my humble abode" he waves his hand around.

"Damn Jacob" you look around for a little bit but you don't want to get attached to the place.

You'd be gone by the time morning came anyways. Similar to Jake's you have routine of your own. This is how you usually end up and just like the others you don't see them when the sun starts to shine. You’ll never make the mistake of spending the night ever again. Although your reason differs from Jake's it's still a staple in both of your lives.

He sits down beside you on the couch and instantly the mood starts to shift. "It's weird"

"Hmm what is?" Jake questioned.

"Usually at this part I start to get a pit in my stomach"

"That's- that’s not a good thing Mia"

"I know but for the first time I don't have a pit more like butterflies"

"Well you're about as pretty as a butterfly" he spoke in an accent.

"Add that to your list of pick up lines"

"The good or bad ones?"

"The good ones" you smile.

Your eyes burn of need as he closes the gap between your lips. He's kissing you slow and sloppy another thing you're not used to. Always fasted pace and rushed. However, slow and passionate is something you could get used to. His hand rest on your cheeks and yours lays upon his shoulders. You stay that way until you've lost sight of everything else. All you can feel is his lips on yours. You get a whiff of his cologne making you drift farther into ecstasy. Getting caught up in the moment a quite moan slips past your lips. He pulls back sucking your bottom lip as he does.

"I heard that pretty girl"

"Did you like it?" Your eyes flutter.

He smiles "you know I did"

He kisses you for a long while until you start to notice the bulge in his jeans. Your hand moves to his thighs and you feel him through the denim. In a flash he's carrying you over his shoulder and up the stairs. You giggle in excitement "we going to the bedroom Jakey?"

He stops abruptly and places you on your feet.

"What did you just say?"

"| asked if-"

"No what did you call me?" He speaks through a harsh tone.

You've become a little nervous and whispered your answer "Jakey"

"Fuck"

He shoves you against the wall so hard the force causes a picture frame to fall. "Say it again"

You realize he's unbelievably turned on by the nickname. Though you can't think of a reason why. Your nerves quickly shift into excitement.

"Oh Jakey" you tease in a suductive tone with a shake of your head.

His hand wraps around your throat "don't do that to me. I can't control myself”

"What's the matter Jakey? Think I can't handle it?"

"I know you can't that's why we keep that little nickname in the dark" his finger brushes your lip.

"And if I don't ... Jakey?"

He hissed through his teeth grabbing your shoulders and walking until your back hits the door. His hands resumes its place on your throat as he slowly turns the knob. By his grip on your throat he shoves you hard on the bed. You plop down with a gasp and wait for his next move.

"I fucking warned you”

You poke out your bottom lip "oh no" you tease. He strips off his shirt and unzips his jeans. You play along and slowly slide down your skirt. His glossy eyes watch hard as you reveal how wet your panties are. His eyes widen noticing the darken spot and he throws his head back "fuck you’re so wet for me”.

He slowly walks towards you taking in the sight. He bites his bottom lip as his eyes wonder you. Your laid on the side of the bed as he stands between your legs.

Impatient you whine "Come on Jakey".

"Shut up"

He lands a hit on your thigh not hard enough to hurt but enough to sting. You fucking love it and smile asking for more. "again"

"Oh you like that do you?"

"Mhm give it to me"

He gives you a few more careful not to actually hurt you. He switches and lands a hit against your clothed clit. "Oh fuck yes" you cry.

"Now you really liked that huh?"

"Please harder" you whine pathetically.

"Such a good girl telling me exactly what you want"

Another crack echoed through the room. "I wanna be your good girl Jakey"

He squeezes and pulls at your breast. His hands are everywhere it's almost overwhelming. He's breathing you in like it's his last breath. While he's acupied you reach down to feel his cock.

He's unbelievable hard as pre cum leaks trom his tip. You feel the budge of the veins causing you to shiver. All you want is to feel him inside your aching cunt. Running his tip through your slick he reacts with another hiss.

"I need you inside of me please" you choke out.

With no hands he slides himself into you. You moan out in satisfaction. "Jakey"

With a noise close to that of anger he's unleashed upon you. His hands grip your hips tight as he thrust into you at an unforgiving pace. Instantly you're struggling to remain in control of yourself.

"Just like that baby"

"You feel so good Mia"

He's pounding into you so hard the noise echoes down the hall. He stretches you perfectly you think you might just fall apart in his hands. You're loud. Louder than you've ever been but he encourages you after every moan.

"So fuckin loud for me. Let me heard how good you feel"

"-I fuck" Your eyes start to roll and your head nods feeling so heavy. Your ability to hear or even respond is fading.

"Stay with me pretty girl"

He throws your legs over shoulders and holds your head with both his hands. Forcing you to look into his eyes. "are you with me?"

"I'm here"

"You're doing so good baby. Taking me so well"

"Jake!” You cry with pouty lips.

"There she is. So good so pretty so fucking tight"

"You fuck my pussy so good. So good” you mumble under your breath thankful he heard.

"Oh I know darlin"

For a moment you wonder how he's still able to hold a conversation with you. As you fight for consciousness you know you're close to falling off the edge. Your stomach starts to warm and you feel that familiar feeling once more. "Don't stop please. I'm so close"

"I'm not going anywhere pretty baby. You just focus on me"

He drops his hand down to your clit rubbing smalls circles with his thumb "Please!" you cry.

"Please what? Tell me what you need pretty girl”

"Choke me l'm gonna cum!"

"Oh fuck nasty girl”

His hand squeezes your throat and you're completely gone. You couldn't stop this orgasm from crashing over you even if you wanted to.

You can't decide if it's the just alcohol or if something else is going on. Everything feels different and you almost panic. He knows what's going on with your body before you even do. He pulls out causing your own ejaulation to fall out of you. You can barely understand what's happening but with blurry vision you watch as his jaw drops.

"Holy shit just like that doll"

He slides himself back in for a few thrust before pulling out and watching the show again.

“I’m sorry-“

“Eyes on me”

Your shaking and heaving beneath him. Seeing stars and whimpering his name like a prayer. You've never had an orgasm even close to this. He finishes with his release spilled on your stomach. Slowing his pace he softly fucks into you. His fingertips light as ever moving your crazy hair out of your face. He wipes away your sweat and tears giving you a fucked out smile. He plops down beside you catching his breath. After serval minutes you start to come down from your high. When you do you realize the position you've found yourself in. He's already clean you up and your laid across his body as he scratches your scalp gently. What have you done? You should be gone by now or at least close to home. Instead your laid on a strangers chest. Although he doesn't feel much of a stranger. More like a long lost friend. Never in your life has a man taken such good care of you. He cleaned up after himself and devoted his time to baby you. His touch softer than any you've ever felt. It's too much you almost want to cry. Safe with a man is something you've never felt. You push away the tears that threaten your eyes. This is going to hurt. Having to leave him but you know you have to. It’s for the best. You know if you don't leave now there's no going back. If you stay tonight your heart will always long for him. You can't do it. You just cannot.

"Are you feeling okay?"

You nod.

"I'm assuming you've never done that before"

"I didn't know I could" you admitted.

"You're more than capable" he smiles.

"Apparently" you laugh softly and sit up pulling the blankets around you.

"Stay the night" Jake stretches "I'll take you for breakfast in the morning"

"I can't. I-I don't stay ... not anymore"

His finger rubs your cheek bone "has someone hurt you Mia?"

You nod “it’s okay I was stupid I shouldn’t stayed with him”

He frowns and you can see his eyes sadden.

“I won’t hurt you. I’ll take care of you Mia. I’ve never let a woman stay but-”

He opens his mouth as if to speak but shuts it after a moment. He sighs and looks like a wounded puppy. The last thing he wants is to pressure you.

"I can't I'm sorry"

"I'm sorry someone hurt you Mia. If I knew I would have-"

"No Jake stop it. I want to be seen as a victim and I don't want you feeling sorry for me. So just don't". You sit up pushing away from him.

"Mia"

"I can't have sex sober so you can't get your fill in the morning anyways. So it doesn't even matter right?"

"God damn it Mia!" He nearly shouts at you. "I don't want you to stay because I want to fuck you again. I like you your not like anyone l've ever met before. I'm not some freak sex addict okay? Fucking hell"

He doesn't want this to be his usual and you both move on. He can’t put his finger on it but somehow you feel like home. Like those cold Michigan months he endured as a child. Except the fire upon the living room burns bright. The wind whistles outside only to be muted by the sound of laughter. With the faint hum of plucking strings this is Jakes first memory of peace. When the stress of life begins he can’t help but think back knowing he’ll never feel this way again. Yet now that your laid across his bed he starts to feel it. The feelings of home, warmth, and safety. For the first time in his life he's not afraid to fall. As long as you're willing to catch him.

"Jake"

"Mia"

You sigh "I'm different when I'm sober okay? I'm fragile and afraid. I'm not so bad ass and outgoing. There’s a lot of shit you don’t know. I'm a fucking mess Jake"

"Aren't we all Mia? Don't get off thinking I'm so perfect"

"Look at you" you scoff.

He laughs in astonishment "Mia I haven't had a girlfriend in years, l've never had sex sober, and I'm so scared of committing to anyone l've pushed away any chance of a relationship"

"So what's so special about me?" You raise an eyebrow.

"I can’t explain it Mia. You bring back a feeling I haven’t felt in a long time. My love you’re so beautiful. I need you to trust me."

He puts his hand on your face and you poke out your lip "Jake I-"

"I'll sleep on the couch Mia just please"

"But who will hold me?"

He smiles softly with a sigh of relief "I'm here. Right here"

You lay your head back on his chest. He runs his fingers through your hair leaving tingles on your neck. It feels nice to be taken care of it. Far too nice for you to even keep your eyes pried open.

With a soft smile you drift to sleep before you can stop yourself. Despite the issues you usually have attempting to sleep, you’re out within seconds. Unlike Jake who fought sleep just to be able to feel your touch longer. He pondered for a while about what to do with feelings this strong. Didn’t take long before he knew exactly what needed to be done.

The next day he took you to meet his brothers.

~

Taglist: @hailthegodsong

[two-bees-poetry]

4!

4. what is your favourite line you wrote this year?

Oh... oh I'm so bad at picking just one, so I'll give you a long list, I guess.

"he is our brother; he never let me play alone. i miss him and i miss him and now he'll never know." this test of the mountain

"i crack myself open, blood floods from the mountain; i will fix this with my bare hands." this test of the mountain

"i miss you / i hate you again / i'll make you eat it raw like revenge" are you hungry (medea, alone)

"i hold enough inside of me, crying over a biography" i have no words (macduff, a girl)

"i build myself with ichor from your veins / sink teeth into the parts that i love most. / i am become a weapon of remains- / if i can't have you here, i'll have your ghost." i am become

"damned are those who bear the witch's mark- / i love you; please don't leave me in the dark." i am become

"i'm done asking- done asking (i hate this part) can i come home for forgiveness. dad. dad. dad. will you be kind this time?" can i come home?

"you know i'm right, you men- you know this well, / but you have your pride, and village talk is cheap. / hear- i can hear- i can feel my death knell. / i can hear you when you call me infidel." village girl's villanelle

"open, like an animal, raw like a whipped dog. like a bruised throat, something that won't die." my voice is in my sword

"deny me salvation, but don't let me die running." my voice is in my sword

"it's like a snake eating its own tail when they talk, his sentences picking up where hers finish. he has an easy laugh and a smile like a serrated knife. nobody likes who the two of them are becoming, but nobody can stop it, like a hurricane ripping through the south." stages of a king waging war on his daughters

"cordelia's new favorite word is JUSTICE. she demands it from the world, screaming herself hoarse at rallies, slowly realizing that she is a young woman marching in the rain, turning fury into change." stages of a king waging war on his daughters

"i look like dad. she looks at me and sees him. i look at her and see a punishment." a house tour from electra

"you ask her if she plans to leave. she unwraps another lollipop and sticks it in her mouth. if this house doesn't collapse by itself, i'm gonna burn it to the fucking ground." a house tour from electra

[starly-amazing]

Cover art by @khorrorshow as a donation commission for Palestine. Commission him or his team here!

A Star From the Multiverse - Ch 4 is OUT!

Fic summary: Siffrin wakes up in the field South of Dormont... after beating the King. After WINNING. He should be celebrating their victory with his friends atop the house! They won! So WHY!? They drag themself through the day and to the Favor Tree in the dead of night. He calls out—wishes—for help and the Universe listens... by dropping an entirely alien creature with fangs and feathers and talons right at his feet.

Chapter summary: Wuh oh! Turns out Loop isn't quite as helpful as Siffrin had dared to hope. It's fine though! It's fine!!!

Rating: Mature (eventually) Graphic depictions of violence & all the canon-typical warnings.

[Read on Ao3]

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

You

forgot

the rock trap!

YOU FORGOT THE ROCK TRAP!

IDIOT!

STUPID! STUPID!!!

THAT'S THE FIRST TRAP! HOW DID YOU FORGET THAT?

'THIS IS THE LAST LOOP' HUH?

THE LAST LOOP!

NOT GONNA DIE AGAIN, RIGHT?

HAHAHAHA

HAHAH AHHAHAHA HAHA HAHHAHHA HAHAH

OH THIS IS SO FUNNY! I HOPE THE AUDIENCE IS LAUGHING!

...

Because I'm not.

Siffrin wants to shrivel up and die right there. Just die die die and die again. Die and not come back.

If they can't even get past the first trap, how are they supposed to even beat the King again, let alone figure out what's really causing the loops?

They hear light footsteps and swishing grass and, as if being pulled up by puppet strings, they rise and stretch their smile back on.

Okay, well. The curtains open once more; they won't wait for you! Put your smile back on ‘stardust’ and don't make anyone suspicious this time!

Right on time, Mirabelle arrives to chastise them for napping. They smile and nod, smile and nod, and soon enough, she's on her way. Their eye was too unfocused to even tell if she was fooled by their act.

Not like it matters, anyway, he'll be dead in a day anyway.

But they'll have to put on the act once more, and then again and again and again until the end of time!

Stars.

They start to head to town, but a tug at the back of their mind has them turning back around and staring into the trees.

Oh right. Loop.

They push their way into the thicket and scan for any signs of the rukemi.

"Loop?" they call out to the boulder next to the suspiciously quivering foliage. "I'm going to the Favor Tree. I'll talk to you there, I guess."

Why there, anyway? There's no reason you have to go there.

...

Big tree nice.

They shrug, shake the leaden feeling from their limbs--or at least try--and trudge through the meadow.

Happy face. Happy face! Let's go Siffrin!

They pat their cheeks and shake their head to knock some of the despair away. Or, rather, to hide it better.

Mirabelle's second conversation went well, for the most part. She looked at them with a raised eyebrow and a quirk of the head a few times, but if she suspected anything, she said nothing.

Success! Just fit right back into that role!

...

Isabeau time.

" Tree-mendous tree! " they smirk and watch as he barks out his normal (normal!) laugh. He raises his hand toward Siffrin, stops, then lets it fall to his side.

Siffrin blinks. Did that happen before?

They can't take their mind off that gesture as they script their way through the rest of the conversation. It has been a while, after all, besides the complete fumble of the last loop.

He gives a small wave as Isabeau walks off, stopping at the treeline to give him a questioning look before leaving.

Weird. Well whatever, you probably still look like shit.

Shit?

Loop's swear popped into their mind so naturally. They don't even know what it means yet; maybe it isn't even a swear!

Sure sounds like one though. It has that zest only the good swears have.

He shrugs and moves on.

The Favor Tree looms over them, guarding a little patch of night under its million leaves. He inches forward and calls out.

"Loop?"

They look up into the branches to see the rukemi flattened against the same branch from last loop. They peer at him, tilting their head with their ears and long feathers fanned up and out. Like they're studying him, like they're deciding if he's a friend or a meal.

They don't respond. Just stare.

With a deep breath, Siffrin hauls themself up to their branch and plops down. They don't make eye contact for a moment, already suspecting some sort of quip for looping back so soon.

"So...Stardust?"

They groan. "I know, I know, I said that was the last loop and then messed it up."

"Hahah, yeah I uh..." They scratch the back of their head right under their long, fluffy feathers. "I suppose I should know what you're talking about?"

Siffrin's blood runs cold. "What? What!? What do you mean? You don't remember last ni--loop? ANYTHING?"

"I--" their gaze follows a dry leaf as it flutters down through the air, hitting and nearly sticking on branches on the way. "I think? Some things? You def--"

"Like what!?" He leans dangerously close to the edge of the branch.

Loop flinches. "Well, um. You're trying to kill a King?" they say with a huff and a flick of their tail.

A twisting feeling in their chest falls. "...Is that all?"

"No. Something about...hmm..." They bring their claw, no longer cracked, to their mouth and bite down once again. They speak in a low rumble. "No, that's impossible, but..."

"Yes!?"

"Time...loops? That's what you meant, right?"

Siffrin nods so aggressively their hat nearly falls off. "Yes! I told you about it and everything! And you don't remember?"

Loop lowers their head against their shoulders, as if trying to hide in their feathers. "Time loops, tyrannical king--now isn't that redundant?--he/they, stuck for a while, forgotten a lot since you've been trapped, I think, something about mangoes...oh right you told me quite a lot of personal details I don't think were relevant to anything, didn't you?"

Siffrin bites their lip. "Was relevant to me," they mumble.

Loop tilts their head. "Erm, well, we can unpack that another time." They put their claws together in the shape of a diamond.

"...Is that all?"

They make a swirling gesture in the air. "Bits and pieces of things. But, yes." Their feathers settle. "That's about it."

Siffrin sighs. They close their eye and press their face into their hands. Gravity pulls at them harder and harder, making them sink into themself. If the branch he's sitting on shatters and he crashes to the ground in a pile of meat, he wouldn't even be surprised.

Heh.

Ground meat.

But the branch holds firm, and he's faced with the fact that it's only his mind pulling him down.

"Stardust?"

Siffrin grunts. At least they remember that .

Okay. Okay, no this is fine. They're only mostly unhelpful! They remember more than your friends, at least! We can still figure things out!

Digging his palms into his face, he takes a deep breath and faces the rukemi. "We're here to kill the King who's been freezing everyone in time and--" they inhale again and push on. They repeat much of what they said the night before, slowly, painfully, already writing the script in their mind, they plan on telling Loop every single time from then on...

A flash of a buried memory flits across their mind, and they perk up slightly.

Oh right, at least there's that.

They divert the topic and dig through the mire for more and more, picking up speed until there's an edge of desperation to their voice.

More campfire meals. Finding an orb (which one, which one!?). Isabeau's strong hand stopping him from walking straight into a trap he so stupidly missed. Tending to Mirabelle's hair after the river mishap. Losing a drunken arm wrestling match to Odile. Losing a sober arm wrestling match to Bonnie.

Loop listens, just like the night before, head tilting side to side, occasionally having their attention stolen by a fluttering leaf or the gentle piou piou of a songbird.

After Siffrin's words peter off once again, they massage their throat and press their face into the cool, rough bark of the tree.

"Well." Loop stretches out, careful not to tumble out of the tree or snap the branch. "You certainly gave me a lot of information... Again."

"Please remember it this time," they murmur, dejected, hollow.

"Ehh. No promises."

Siffrin can only groan.

"But I certainly can try!" They give him a soft smile with their eye.

"Why can't you remember it all? Why is it only me?"

Why me why only me why why why?

"How would I know?" They give an exaggerated shrug. "Maybe you're infecting me with your memory problems."

"How would I even do that?"

They snort. "Well, we've already established time loops are a thing, so infectious amnesia doesn't seem quite so far-fetched anymore." They flick a leaf off their haunch with their tail. "Also, that was a joke."

Siffrin grumbles and knocks their head against the trunk. "Ugh, some help this is. The Universe is just toying with me at this point."

"I'm sorry ?" They raised their brow.

"I found you because the branch broke and you fell out of the tree."

Loop sinks their head into their shoulders. "Eghh, stars, that's unfortunately one of the things I do remember. What of it?"

"If the Universe did that--if it sent you to help , then this is just some sort of sick cosmic joke."

Just like me.

"Okay, first of all, rude. Secondly, the Universe doesn't work like that. It doesn't care about us. It just is. "

Siffrin presses his forehead to the bark. “Ugh, it’s not like any of that is real anyway." He lets out another long-suffering sigh.

"Are you even listening to me?" Loop's ears twitch. “Ehh, we’re getting off-topic anyway.”

Siffrin sniffs and shifts their head to look at them again. The bark scratches at their face and pulls at their hair.

“You still in there, stardust?”

They grunt.

"Okay, good enough," they shrug. "Anyway, I'm assuming you have not defeated the King again.”

"No." He knocks his cheek against the tree.

"Okay, well, did you try the thing I suggested? The er...poison?"

They grimace. "...No."

"And why not?"

Siffrin grits their teeth. "Didn't make it that far."

"Oo, that would mean you died, correct?"

They scrunch their nose and nod.

"Well, try not doing that again!"

He scowls and is only met with a twitch of Loop's ear.

"Well, anyway, now that you're not quite so...er...last night... Maybe we can put our heads together again and think of something else. What did your party do when you talked to them about it, again?"

"I haven't told them. I can 't tell them."

"Right. And you haven't told them once...why?"

“I told you why."

Loop squeezes their eye shut and exhales. "Something about not wanting to hurt them. A ridiculous reason in my humble opinion, but it seems like you're not budging on that." They clap their hands together and turn their eye upward in a smile. "Well! We'll just have to do this in a more roundabout way, then! Maybe there's somewhere you can do more research? You all have libraries here, right?"

They raise an eyebrow at Loop. Duh .

"Mhm. There's one in town and in the House."

"There you go! A new goal to strive for."

"Ehh, I'll check it, I guess."

How many more loops will it take to even find something useful? There's so many books in the House, and you can't even go into most of them.

"Great! Let's make a list of what we need to figure out. First order of business is to find an easier way to kill the King."

Siffrin presses themself even harder into the bark. "Don't even know if I can , I've tried thousands of times and only managed that one time. What if it was a fluke? What if Mira's not able to deal the final blow next time? What if there's never a 'next time'? What if I can't replicate what I did last time and have to fight him another thousand times?"

...

They scream into their hands.

"I can't do that. I can't keep doing this."

Loop's wings droop. "Well, that's what the research and experimenting is for, stardust. Finding another way." Their voice is gentle, soft like their feathers seem to be.

Siffrin's eye focuses on Loop's talons and how they so easily carve through the bark on the tree. An image flashes in their mind of them carving them into the King's throat--of their fangs slicing through all the weak points in his armor as he thrashes around and paints the room in his blood.

He thinks about Loop's jaws around his own throat--

"Can you help us?" The words tumble out of their lips on their own.

Stupid. Why are you asking this?

"Huh? I mean, I already am?" They flick their tail. "Well, trying, at least."

How are you going to explain to your friends? Are you that desperate?

"I mean help us fight the King."

'Oh, hey everyone, do you mind if I bring a blinding dragon thing with us to the fight? No, they won't eat you! Probably!'

"Er, no. I do distinctly remember telling you I'm not supposed to interact with humans. That includes killing them--even if it is regicide." They add that last bit with a huff and a gaze into the distance.

Siffrin sighs.

Well, at least you don't have to think about explaining anything.

"Plus, I won't be much help, I'm no fighter and couldn't kill a human even if I wanted to." There's a tinge of bitterness to that statement.

"But how? You're covered in sharp parts. It should be easy!"

" I am not a weapon !" they hiss, jaws slamming shut and glaring straight at him with an intense, wide-eyed look. Their feathers stand on end and almost vibrate with emotion.

It was enough to make Siffrin jump and straighten himself out.

" I. Don't. Fight . I didn't sign up for any of this." Loop grimaces and slaps their hand to their head, digging their talons into their scalp. "I didn't ask for this blinding migraine or to be dropped at your feet in the dead of night. I'm helping because I'm stuck in this fucking mess too, but I will not fight your battles for you."

A shiver runs down their spine as their blood chills. "Right, okay, sorry."

Loop studies them for a moment longer, making them shrink into their collar and under their hat until they look like a stray pile of clothes.

Loop sighs and scratches the bridge of their snout. "It's fine." A bit of dried skin falls off their scar and spirals down. The exposed flesh underneath makes the space behind Siffrin's good eye ache a bit. The shade of it is...slightly strange, but they can't really put their finger on what is so wrong about it.

Now that it isn’t quite so dark as before, Siffrin can take a closer look at Loop.

They look… not great.

He can't see much of their left eye; there's hardly any left of it besides scar tissue. It doesn't seem like they can open or close it any more than it already is.

The scar on their face is thick and leathery and extends partway down their neck. It's mottled with different shades and patterns, suggesting that it hadn’t been properly healed. It seems to pull their head slightly to the left as the skin has tightened from whatever injury caused it. A burn? There's really nothing else that could have done it...unless it was caused by whatever chemical warfare Loop was talking about.

Siffrin suppresses a shudder.

They seem to be missing feathers here and there, and many of the existing ones are damaged or dirty. And their front legs--the skin on them looks rough and mottled, though not quite as extreme as their facial scar.

It's hard for Siffrin to really guess much about Loop's condition outside of the obvious--it's not like he knows any other rukemis to compare them to. But... thinking about the fluffy round birds hopping around town, and the many, many chickens and ducks they've seen in their lifetime (oh, a memory! He's seen chickens and ducks before, now isn't that useful!) Loop looks... thin.

"Loop, are you hungry?"

They jump slightly; it seems like they were distracted by studying Siffrin themself.

"I could be, perhaps. Maybe a little." They puff out the feathers on their body just a bit.

"I can get you something to eat." They grab their silver coin and squeeze it in their hand until it hurts. "Well, I don't have any money, but I can catch some fish."

Loop's ears turn back, and they sigh. "It's fine, stardust. It's not like it matters if we're going to go back in time anyway."

"...Right."

The sun is close to the horizon. Dinner will be ready soon. Maybe he can leave a plate out for them; it's not like food does him any good anymore.

"Anyway, I'm sure you have places to be soon. So hurry on over to the library to find some other way of killing the King and more about the loops or whatever." They scratch at their throat. "I still vote poison, or dropping the ceiling on him, but I'm sure there's other magic spells you can use to turn him inside out or something."

Ew. But again, too kind an end for him.

"Okay. Thank you, Loop."

"Don't mention it. And please find something soon."

"I'll try."

Siffrin shifts themself and clambers down the massive tree, making each step with care to fight off the pins and needles that have returned. He takes one more glance at Loop as they watch him silently, head resting on their hands.

With a nod, he heads to the library and feels his smile plaster itself back on the moment he reenters Dormont. He wastes no time with pleasantries and heads straight for the nearest bookshelf.

The librarian approaches him anyway. "You're one of the saviors, right?" They ask with a tilt of their head, the beads on their glasses make a funny little clinking sound. "Do you need my help with something?"

He flinches. They stare at the librarian, giving them a questioning gaze. 

Oh right the boulangier isn’t the only villager who talks to you. Oh. When was the last time you even went there? 

A pain au chocolat doesn’t sound terrible in that moment. Maybe they should go grab one. Anything chocolate. Maybe something for Loop, too.

Wait… 

Can Loop eat chocolate? Or will it kill them because they’re part dog or something?

“Hello?” The librarian waves a hand in front of their face. “Are you okay?”

“Huh? Oh, right? No chocolate for me, please—I mean I’m fine, thank you!”

They blink a few times. “Well, okay then. I’ll be over here if you need anything.”

Siffrin pulls their smile wider and waves a ‘thank you’ before turning back to the bookshelves.

Okay, that was blinding awkward of you, but whatever, not like any of this matters in the loops anyway! 

He shakes his head clear. Sliding his finger across the spine of every book, he reads each title carefully, once, sometimes twice, blinking away the fog in his mind.

Useless.

Useless.

Useless.

Weird headache book again.

Oh? No, just basic craft spells.

Nothing. Of course not. They probably checked it a hundred times before and just forgot.

What were they looking for again?

Oh, right, ways to hit the King harder and a book on time loops, as if that's something that exists outside of fiction. Maybe one of Mira’s horror books has something on time loops. Maybe it’s based on a true story too! You just gotta casually ask her—

No, that’s stupid, of course it’s stupid! 

Defeated, they lightly hit their head on the shelf and trudge out. 

Whatever. Whatever! It's something to look forward to. Enrichment!

They blink.

They're at dinner, eating ash once again. He smiles through the banter and is happy to notice that their friends aren't as suspicious as the previous loop. Or at least they don't seem to be.

Something to look forward to. Don't run headlong into your death this time!

He blinks.

They're in bed and Isabeau is once again trying to tell him what he's tried to say a thousand times before.

Don't be stupid, stupid, stupid this time.

They close their eye.

They're back at the House once more. At least they managed to get a little more rest that time. Even if they didn't get to sleep much, they still got to be horizontal for a few hours.

Beats sitting in a tree and talking all night.

It's hopeless.

But at least there's something new to do.

For now.

[rossithepixie]

Alrighty since people seem interested in this I guess i'll make it an official post with a an open tag!

What JJK polycule would you be a part of?

For me like I said in my original post I took it twice and the common factor was Gojo in both

satoru gojo and suguru geto this would be a super chill, deep and fun relationship. i think you’d all be best friends. its the kind of relationship where youre all comfortable with and know each other so well that words arent really even needed. gojo loves you and geto, geto loves you and gojo, and you love them both. you would die for each other. people might not even be able to tell if you guys are together or just close friends, but the answer is: both! you have fun together, no matter where you are or what you do. i feel like you and geto have to take turns being the responsible one; if you and gojo are up to something he’ll gently persuade you not to do something that ends with jailtime, and when he and gojo plan an elaborate, sinister prank on nanami you have to tell them to please leave the poor dude alone. gojo is also the clingiest mf in the world, so youre gonna have to let him cling to you or geto like a koala sometimes. geto isnt as clingy, but will want to just rest with you while reading a book. both of them crave stability, but also fun. oh, and i just see them being protective as hell. theyre the strongest, so you never have to worry about anything happening to you. overall this relationship is just very stable and sweet, and you all love each other more than anything.

(the true otp of my self ships. Roruru)

And a bonus below the cut if you wanna see it without getting it yourself is nanago polycule

satoru gojo and kento nanami this would be a… kinda chaotic but sweet relationship. you are the middle ground that keeps nanami from killing gojo. they bicker pretty often, and disagree on a lot of things — i do think theyd love each other, though. its just in subtext. when nanami tells gojo to fuck off, its said with love. all jokes aside, i think this relationship would work out well, as long as you can balance them out. sometimes gojo needs someone to be a menace with him, sometimes nanami needs someone who ISNT a menace. gojo will steal both your and nanamis clothes, and also cling to you 24/7. nanami usually pushes him off, so youll have to oblige, otherwise he’ll sulk and ask you when the divorce is coming. he’ll buy both of you gifts all the time, and even if hes annoying sometimes, he loves you; and tries to show it, even when it ends up with him audibly saying ”cringe” afterwards. nanami is more lowkey with his affection, but shows it through acts of service and words of affirmation. he wants to make sure youre not feeling overwhelmed, especially considering youre the one who has to ”put up with gojo” most of the time. they argue and bicker, but the relationship is full of love from all sides.

I can see it but I also think I would be more stressed in this dynamic than I am in my roruru one.

[realisticfanfictions]

Being Sanji's Girlfriend & Baratie's Head Waitress - Part 4.

Sanji x Waitress!Reader: Part One, Part Two, Part Three.

Working at Baratie wasn't without its challenges, and the fights that sprung up because of them weren't rare either. You and your boyfriend never sweated the small stuff, after all working in a high stress environment made you, well, stressed. But maybe some things can't be resolved that easily.

Tags: Sanji x Reader, Waitress!Reader, constant bickering, mostly fluff with some angst, (heavy) swearing.

A/N: Initially going into this, I was planning to have the fishmen come in and have the Mihawk fight, but it was a bit more important to set up some more character dynamics before I moved onto 5k words of action scenes. So here's a nice bit of LORE(tm) and a bit more about how Y/N thinks. Next part I promise is 100% action, and I can't wait to show ya'll what I've come up with for Y/N's weapon! It's so cool.

Word Count is 3,421. Hope you enjoy!

Tag list (comment to join!): @siriuslyblackonback @jvhoons

"So, you're really going to fight him?"

Zoro, not looking up from cleaning his swords, nodded. "It's my dream." He explained, observing the blades for any damage. After he challenged the swordsman, the next few things happened rather quickly. The scramble to get Luffy as if that'll somehow convince him to stand down, the captain instead supporting his first mate's goal, and Nami storming off upset. It all passed by in a blur, and now you were alone with Zoro in their ship.

You nodded and turned to look out of the porthole, observing the calm seas that rocked the boat. "I guess dreams are worth dying for." You sighed and leaned back in your chair. "Sucks you met Mihawk too early."

His jaw tightened, and set down his sword. "If I run now, I'll never become the world's greatest swordsman."

You hummed and watched him through the reflection on the glass. "Honour, huh?" You mused and nibbled on the tip of your thumb. "How ridiculous. You're just like Sanji, uncompromising."

"Don't compare me to that shitbag." He snapped and sheathed his sword, clicking it shut in its scabbard. "Speaking of, why are you with him?"

Confused by his words, you looked over at him. "What do you mean?"

"He cheats on you, doesn't he?" He questioned and turned to face you, leaning against the cabinet. "He seemed pretty friendly with Nami a couple hours ago."

You chuckled. "That's just Sanji. He's obsessed with women. It's more," You thought of the words. "It's like having a dog that you love and care for, and though you go up and pet other dogs, you don't abandon your own dog for some random one on the street."

Zoro's eyebrows raised. "You do realise you just called yourself a bitch, right?"

You rolled your eyes and flipped him off. "Shut up. He's just chivalrous, that's all."

"Well, I'd be watching him if I were you." He walked over, his long strides making it seem effortless to reach you. "Guys like that don't tend to keep only one dog."

You opened your mouth to retort, but shut it and stood chest to chest with him. "Just focus on not dying, alright?" His eyes squinted ever so slightly, and he leaned down close to you, gazing directly into your eyes. "What are you doing?"

He stares for a moment, and then straightens himself back up. "Nothing."

You quirked an eyebrow. "Alright, I'm going home to my boyfriend."

"Wasn't trying to make a move." He retorted and stepped aside, letting you walk past him. "(Y/N)?" You placed a hand on the door frame and turned. "Be careful."

You looked him up and down. "Try not to die."

Mihawk's eyes haunted you like a ghostly presence that you couldn't shake off. It was like you could feel those piercing eyes all over your body, every inch of skin was tainted and you hated it. You always have.

The door to you and Sanji's shared room creaked open, and you popped your head inside. You didn't know what to expect, but Sanji jolting himself upright on the chair that sat in the corner of your room wasn't exactly one of them. The door softly clicked closed behind you, and you slowly walked up to him, his eyes on you the entire time as you sat on his lap. You positioned yourself sideways and leaned your head against his chest, reveling in his warmth when he wrapped his arms around you and placed a kiss against your scalp. Sanji's thumb rubbed circles in your thigh, more of an anxious gesture than anything, as he pressed many more kisses against your skin. You sighed and relaxed into him. "I may have overreacted." You started, ripping the band-aid off. "And I apologise."

He nodded. "Thank you for that. Sorry for not finding you sooner."

You shook your head against his chest. "I was drinking, you would've killed my buzz." You paused. "But I guess it was ruined anyway."

"Oh, I'm sorry-"

He stopped when you held up a hand. "I didn't mean you, Sanji." You opened your mouth, but couldn't find the words. Or rather, you found them, you just didn't want to share them. "A man came asking after our new chore boy."

You felt Sanji tense under you. "Are you okay?"

Mihawk's eyes restraining came to mind. "I'll be fine," You picked at a loose thread. "But Zoro won't."

Your boyfriend's hand stopped and pulled back to look you in the eye. "Zoro?"

"Luffy's friend, the guy with the swords. The idiot challenged him to a duel."

Sanji's head tilted. "Why?"

You let out a small sigh and untangled yourself from him, walking a couple feet to your dresser and pulling out a change of clothes. "Because they're idiots with a death wish." You said as you peeled off your top with a groan. "Fuck. Thank God I don't have work tomorrow."

He watched you for a moment as you shimmied out of your clothes and slipped into some pajamas. "Sweetheart, I'm not really comfortable with you drinking with pirates. I mean, it's a bit dangerous-"

You scoffed, pulling an oversized shirt over your head. "They're not pirates," You said as you tugged the shirt down, barely bothering to notice it was a gag shirt with an octopus on a bowl of rice. "Hell, they barely qualify as sailors." But when Sanji didn't respond, you paused. "Oh, you mean was I drinking with Zoro." You turned around to face him. He was leaning forwards in his chair, leg bouncing. You sighed and walked over to him. "He was just my drinking partner, and he's most likely going to die tomorrow." You run your hand through his blond locks. "It'll be fine. You don't have to worry."

"I'll have to trust you then." He said with a smile, then laughed when your gentle pat turned into a frantic scratch. "Hey! Not the hair!"

A smirk split across your face. "I don't know, Sanji. You might just have to trust me!"

He chuckled and grabbed your hands, pulling you forward onto him and wrapping you in his arms. "You know what I mean."

"I guess I'll just trust you-"

"Yep!"

"And trust that you're doing a good job! And- Sanji!" You squeaked when your boyfriend ambushed you with a barrage of soft kisses pressed across any bit of skin he could reach. "You tasteless toad! You're two tablespoons of terrible!"

"Two tablespoons of terrible." He repeated in a strange voice and you giggled when he tried to tickle you. "Oh no! The tickling toad has come to torment you!"

You push his hands away and trap his face in your hands. "You twat." You smiled and gave him a lingering kiss.

When you parted, he gave a soft smile. "And you even ended it with a 't', brilliant."

You quirked an eyebrow. "You weirdo."

He mirrored you. "And I somehow love you."

"But weirdly, you love me very weirdly."

He nodded. "Birds of a feather."

"If we're birds, you're a flamingo."

"Why?"

"Because if I wasn't dating you, I'd think you were a bit of a flamingo."

He gasped. "Then you'd be a penguin, because you bring me rocks."

You leaned back and gave him a look. "Because I bring you rocks?"

He nodded. "Yeah, you even put them on me. And you help me get my rocks off."

He laughed as you hit him. "Sanji! That's so bad!"

Your hands were caught and you were pulled into his chest, both of you giggling and stealing kisses from each other while occasionally snuggling impossibly closer. Sure, you might be a bad person - but you liked who you were with Sanji. And that's all you really cared about.

You lied. That night you couldn't sleep with hundreds of thousands of millions of thoughts racing through your mind. You felt like you were a greyhound chasing down a slightly too-fast rabbit, every time you got close, sleep just slipped through your fingers. Your gaze drifted from the ceiling where you were counting the nails in the boards, and over to your boyfriend. His sleeping face made a million butterflies emerge from their cocoons in your stomach, your heart beating against your rib cage like an angry gorilla. But something about this wasn't right, and you couldn't go to sleep without doing something about it.

Careful to not wake your peaceful boyfriend, you slowly lifted his arm from around your waist and placed it on his pillow, heart aching at the sight of him trying to seek your warmth. Even in sleep he wanted to be close to you. Grabbing your pillow, you gently tucked it under his searching hand and he brought it to his chest with a soft groan, the smell of you satiating him.

You rolled out of bed and tip-toed over the squeaky floorboards, wincing every time the floor made a sound. After looking back each time and taking moments between each footstep, you made it through the door and quickly shut it behind you. The early morning's chilly air struck you, but you ignored the goosebumps rising under your skin and continued on. It felt strange walking without your heels clicking against the floorboards, but you weren't looking to make noise, or look fashionable in this instance.

The Overnights were rooms for guests who've either had too much to drink, or who pay extra to stay overnight to hookup, or just to stay, again, overnight. You passed by the many in-use rooms filled with snoring and other unseemly sounds, rolling your eyes at the disgusting slobs behind the doors. A room stood out amongst the others, however, and you knew it held what you were seeking. The aura that emanated from it was unmistakable.

You reached into your hair and pulled out a bobby pin, sticking it in between your teeth to open it and then jammed it into the lock. All the locks were the same on the Baratie, and you only had to jimmy the locks, moving the pins frantically within, to open it without much effort. The door clicked open and you gently pushed it open.

When you stepped inside, you felt it. The blade at your neck. Without a second thought, you pushed it from your jugular and grabbed the silver candlestick on the hallway table, holding it firmly as the blade was struck against it. It sliced through with ease and a sharp burning went through your cheek, knowing that if you hadn't moved your head, it would've went through your eye. "You're slow." Came the hauntingly beautiful, yet unsettling voice from your nightmares.

You hissed and shoved his sword away from your face. "You haven't seen me in seven years, and the first thing that comes from your mouth is criticism? How shocking."

"Six." He corrected, and the room was suddenly bathed in a low yellow hue. Dracule Mihawk was a terrifying man. His golden, ringed eyes glowed in the dim light and when they looked you over, it felt like he was observing your soul and picking it apart with the grace one would picking the petals off of a flower. Those eyes locked onto yours. "It's been six years."

You rolled your eyes and pushed past him. The room was a similar layout to your own, with the only difference being the minimalist design and abhorrent amount of red wine. You knew the latter didn't come from the room. Rather, they came from his personal stash that would deem any other man an alcoholic. But Mihawk was simply old-fashioned, born in the wrong non-vampiric century if you will.

He sheathed his famed black blade Yoru in one smooth motion and danced past you, sitting gracefully in his armchair and crossing one leg over the other. Your eyes drifted over to his hat hung on a hook and reached out to run your fingers against the silky feather. "Don't touch it." The old swordsman warned behind you, picking up his book and flipping over the next page. "I despise disorganisation. It needs to be acceptable for my duel tomorrow. Or rather, in the upcoming moments since you have woken me up at such an ungodly hour."

Despite your reluctance, your arm retracted almost on its own. "You were already awake, asshat." You turned around and crossed your arms. "And it'll be creased anyway, so it doesn't matter if-"

"Not necessarily." His words were as sharp as his gaze. "If we go by that barbaric logic, it doesn't matter if a man is murdered since we all die in one way or another."

You scoffed and returned his look with your own glare. "I'm not too sure, you're more experienced when it comes to murdering men."

Mihawk picked up his expensive crystal wine glass, and took a long, silent sip of his Tarapaca. It was placed back down onto the table with a clink. He leaned back in his chair which squeaked as he did so, and interlocked his fingers. "Why are you here, (Y/N)?"

"I was going to ask you the same question."

His head tilted for a moment, before righting itself. "I'm here for Monkey D. Luffy."

You hadn't realised your shoulders were tensed until they drooped down. "That's it?"

He nodded. "I am only here as an obligation to Garp to collect his grandson."

To your annoyance, your throat tightened. "I thought that was an excuse."

"It wasn't." The man you hated sat in his chair completely unbothered. His eyes lingered on you for a moment, before drifting back to his book. He flipped the page. "'But tell me, at the time of those sweet sighs, by what and in what manner Love conceded that you should know your dubious desires?'"

Pathetically, you felt stinging at the corners of your eyes. "'And she said to me: “There is no greater sorrow then to recall our times of joy in wretchedness.”'" You breathed in through your nose. "Inferno, by Dante Alighieri."

"From?"

You cleared your throat. "Divine Comedy."

"What year?"

You took in a breath and shook your head. "1321?"

He said nothing and turned the page. You stood silently, wanting to run but having no strength to do so. His gaze finally lifted to meet yours. "Is that all?"

A chill ran over your skin, and you were once again reminded of the kind of man he was. There was a lot you wanted to say to Dracule Mihawk. So much hatred and anguish that you had to endure, all the suffering handed to you by the well-manicured hands of the greatest swordsman in the world. You hated him. "Unless you want to say anything?"

His eyes held yours for a moment. "Goodnight."

"Go fuck yourself." You practically grew fangs and spat venom at him. Spinning on your heel, you kicked the wall where his hat hung and stormed out of the room.

A scream bubbled in your throat. Your nails dug into your palms, and your lips were bloodied from ripping them open. He had no- you couldn't- he was such a-

As you turned a corner, you felt something pinch the base of your skull and you whipped around. Pulling your gun and aiming it, you locked eyes with the other swordsman in your life. Zoro, bathed in moonlight, turned his attention from his swords to you. The rag he was cleaning his blade with stopped and he was focused solely on you. "I think I know who you are."

You scoffed and shoved your gun back in its holster. "Well, apparently most people don't, so I'll take anything at this point." He was quiet, and your lips tightened into a smile. "Want a drink?"

The door opened with a click and Zoro whistled. "Nice trick."

You put the bobby pin back in your hair with a smile. "Thanks." The Baratie after-hours was a sight to behold, but the bar was even better. You smiled at Zoro and guided him around the front of the bar where the shutters were closed.

"Thought you said it's open all night."

You looked behind you as you bent down to the latch holding the fish's mouth closed. "I said you couldn't get anything on tap around three in the morning," You unhooked the chain and pulled it free from the floor. "Didn't say that the bar was open. Come help me." You shuffled to the side to make room for him, and grabbed onto the shudders. He appeared by your side and hooked his fingers under the shudders next to yours, you both nodded to each other and grunted as you lifted the shudders. You expected it to be heavier, but with Zoro it lifted with surprising ease. The moonlight poured in and illuminated the bar, shining through the empty bottles of booze and creating a kaleidoscope of colours.

The green-haired swordsman chuckled and looked around. "I've never been in a bar after hours." He sat down on a nearby couch normally reserved for V.I.Ps. "It feels naughty."

You shrugged, walking over to the bar and reaching over. "Yeah well, if we're caught I'll probably get fired, so don't fuck around." Your fingers wrapped around the neck of a bottle and you hoisted it to eye-level. "You a rum guy?"

He smiled and gave a half-shrug. "I'm a booze guy."

"Good answer." You said and carried over two shot glasses for the both of you. Sitting down, you tugged off the cork with your teeth and poured yourselves shots. You raised your glasses. "To you dying tomorrow."

His eyebrows raised. "To me surviving tomorrow." He corrected and clinked his glass against yours, keeping his eyes on you as you took a shot together. He sighed, flicking his head and nodding. "That's good."

You nodded and sniffed. "It's very good." You filled your glasses again. "Only the best shit for the only guy that knows me." You gulped it down, and didn't wait for him to finish before filling yours back up.

He chuckled. "I'm the one dying tomorrow, and here you are drinking like it's the end of the world."

"Yeah, well," You sniffed and swirled around the liquid in your glass. "My life kind of fucking sucks at the moment. So, I think I deserve to get shit-faced."

Zoro tilted his head and licked his teeth. "I bet you had a miserable childhood."

You laughed and leaned back, tears pricking at yours eyes as you nodded. "Understatement of the century." You said under your breath and looked up at him, forcing a smile. "I grew up on some private land owned by nobles."

He nodded. "You said that."

"Yeah, but what I didn't tell you was I wasn't born there. My Dad, being father of the fucking year, didn't want to care for a baby so he dumped me with some workers. Then, when I truly got attached to my family and finally was accepted as a member of the community, he just came back and picked me up. Like I was some type of broken watch he left to be repaired." You shook your head and reveled in the burn of the rum as it slid down your throat and warmed your stomach. "And ever since then, he's just tormented me. Even when I got away from him, it's like he's always there just watching me - waiting for me to mess up. And you know, all the shit that I did to make him proud of me? Every late night reading libraries' worth of books just in case he quizzed me on it in the morning. Every lesson in combat styles, or how to sense others, whatever the hell that means. Most of the scars I have are from trying myself to him. But never once was I told 'Good job (Y/N)', or that he was proud of me. He never even smiled at me." You finished the shot and placed it down onto the table. "And you know what fucking sucks? After all this time, all the anguish he's put me through? All I want him to look at me and tell me that he loves me."

Zoro looked at his glass and his mouth tightened into a fine line. "I know the feeling." His eyes drifted back to yours. "To shitty parents?" He offered, raising his glass.

You chuckled and shook your head, but poured yourself a glass and raised it. "The shittiest."

A/N: Um, okay this was pretty heavy and it took me a while to write because I wanted to make it actually matter. I think there'll be a few more parts and then we'll be finished with the Baratie saga! Then, I might take a break and do maybe another series/one-shot while I properly plan the next part. We'll also be naming this series! The poll has concluded and within the next couple of days, we'll be figuring out the name! Comment down if you have any suggestions, or want to join the tag list! <3

P.S: When the Baratie saga is done, I'll release it all as one part so that it'll be easier to re-read. It'll be a bit of its own thing, so stay tuned haha.