#so many in a nutshell worthy posts-

[kibby-reaper]

🥜

- mod kibby

[ultravioletqueen]

I've finally decided to post this!

Elysia Korenos is a college student whose parents work for S.T.Y.X. She often goes to the organization's headquarters with her parents because she hopes to work for S.T.Y.X as an engineer one day.

Elysia falls into the adorkable category; meaning she's a very sweet person, but at the same time, she's considered quite a nerd. She has the bad habit of info-dumping wildly when asked about topics that interest her (don't ask her anything about engineering or Dungeons & Dragons because she'll just turn bananas). There are times when she comes across as quite awkward and the opposite of refined.

However, Elysia also knows how to be serious and has a strong sense of independence. Thanks to this independence, she manages to avoid depending on others or being seen as someone who can't do things alone. She knows she's just as capable as anyone else.

Elysia and Idia met through online games. Elysia is also an otaku, so these two started chatting regularly. It was a great experience for both of them to find someone who wouldn't trash them for talking about their interests. Thanks to Elysia's initiative, they started seeing each other in real life as well.

Both Elysia and Idia like each other as more than friends, but they both have a poor self-image and think they might ruin one of the few friendships they have, so they keep quiet about their feelings for each other until they have the courage to confess.

Elysia loves engineering! Her hobby is making small robots that help her complete certain tasks and give her important reminders.

Her unique magic, called "Spark of Life," allows her to give sentience to inanimate objects like the robots she makes. She can remove their spark at will if she feels threatened.

Now I'll talk about the mixed-race twins, Hazel and Sammy.

Hazel and Sammy were born to a human woman and a fairy. However, due to their mother Svetlana's obsessive and toxic behavior, their father ended their relationship without knowing that Svetlana was pregnant with his children. However, out of spite, she decided not to tell him about her children and would raise them alone if necessary. Thus, these two were born.

The twins' mother was always very unequal with her children, preferring Sammy over Hazel because, in her words, "Sammy is just like his father when he was young," and that the bond she has with him is special because of this (she's a boy mom, in a nutshell). This caused Hazel to be neglected by her mother and to become her emotional punching bag, where she projected her insecurities.

Despite his mother's care, Sammy (fortunately) grew up feeling uncomfortable around his mother and always wanted to look out for his sister, whether it was trying to defend her when his mother got angry with her or passing her food when her mother punished her. The twins have a strong bond and have always had each other's backs for as long as they can remember.

Hazel is a shy and meek girl due to her mother's treatment, which made her fear social interactions throughout her life and made her unwilling to tolerate people yelling at her. Hazel clearly has issues with her self-esteem, considering herself unimportant and always prioritizing others over herself, believing that other people's problems are her responsibility.

Hazel is very gentle and sweet, being quite tender to those who know her and a great friend. Many consider her affable temperament worthy of a princess.

Sammy is a himbo. He's not the brightest light bulb in the room, but he has a big heart and is the opposite of toxic masculinity. He's quite well-liked by the people in his dorm and has great social skills, making friends in seconds.

Sammy tries to be independent from his mother and is always clear with his sister that her attention makes him uncomfortable. Because of this, Sammy has very strict rules about his personal space while in NRC.

Sammy becomes friends with Silver the moment he develops diasomnia. Sammy follows him around like a lost puppy. Silver likes his optimism and energy. Sammy makes sure Silver doesn't fall asleep in class and helps Sammy with subjects he doesn't understand.

Sammy introduces Silver to his sister by taking him to one of Hazel's ballet recitals since his mother wasn't showing up again and he didn't want to go alone. After the show, they manage to have a conversation where Silver manages to stay awake without any problems. He also has a chat with Hazel about horseback riding. Hazel loves horses, but her mother refuses to pay for her riding lessons (despite paying for her brother's). Silver offers to teach her for free, which Hazel accepts.

Silver and Hazel form a friendship through horseback riding, which helps Hazel feel more confident by talking more about herself and being more assertive, and Hazel's presence helps Silver be more active and not fall asleep so easily.

Silver tends to treat Hazel like a delicate flower, considering her attitude similar to that of a princess, which makes Hazel blush since she's not used to receiving attention from boys, much less from boys as chivalrous as Silver, whom she sees as a knight in shining armor (literally).

Their romantic dynamic is literally knight and princess: Silver is very patient and protective of Hazel, and Hazel always feels safe with Silver.

Sammy takes the relationship with humor and happiness, since he thinks that Silver's influence helps his sister a lot to be more confident and is more than happy that Silver spends time with her (he wants them to get married someday).

(Español)

¡Por fin he decidido publicae esto!

Elysia Korenos es una universitaria cuyos padres trabajan en S.T.Y.X, ella suele ir a los cuarteles de la organización con sus padres ya que ella desea poder trabajar en la organización S.T.Y.X algún día como ingeniera.

Elysia es una chica que entra en la categoría de adorkable; osea ella es una persona muy dulce pero al mismo tiempo es considerada bastante nerd, tiene el mal hábito de hacer info-dumping a lo loco cuando le preguntan algo sobre los temas que le interesan(no le preguntes nada acerca de ingeniería o calabozos y dragones porque ella se pondrá bananas) y hay veces en las que muestra ser una persona bastante incomoda y todo lo contrario a refinada.

Sin embargo Elysia también sabe como ser sería y tiene un gran sentido de independencia, gracias a esta independencia ella se las arregla para no depender de otros o que los demás la vean como alguien que no puede hacer las cosas sola, ella sabe que es igual de capaz que los demás.

Elysia e Idia se conocieron gracias a los juegos online, siendo Elysia también una otaku estos dos empezaron a chatear muy seguido, para los dos es una gran experiencia poder encontrar a alguien que no les tire basura por hablar de sus intereses y gracias a la iniciativa de elysia ambos empezaron a verse en la vida real también.

Tanto Elysia como Idia se gustan como más que amigos, pero ambos tienen una mala imagen de si mismos y piensan que podrían arruinar una de las pocas amistades que tienen, así que guardan silencio sobre sus sentimientos por el otro hasta que tengan el valor de confesarse.

¡Elysia adora la ingeniería! Tiene de hobbie hacer pequeños robots que le ayudan a hacer ciertas tareas y le hacen recordatorios importantes.

Su magia única se llama "chispa de la vida" y le permite darle conzciencia a objetos inanimados como los robots que ella hace, ella puede quitarles la chispa a voluntad si se siente amenazada.

Ahora hablaré de los mellizos mestizos, hazel y Sammy.

Hazel y Sammy nacieron de una mujer humana y un hada, sin embargo debido a las conductas obsesivas y toxias de su madre svetlana su padre terminó su relación sin saber que svetlana estaba embarazada de él, sin embargo ella decidió por despecho no decirle de sus hijos y que los criaria ella sola si era necesario, así fue que nacieron estos dos.

La madre de los mellizos siempre fue muy desigual con sus hijos, prefiriendo a Sammy por sobre hazel debido a que según sus palabras "Sammy es igual a su papa cuando era joven" y que el vínculo que ella tiene con el es especial por esto mismo(es una boy mom en pocas palabras), lo que provocó que hazel fuera descuidada por su madre y fuera su saco de boxeo emocional donde proyectaba sus inseguridades.

Pese a la atención de su madre sammy(afortunadamente) creció sintiéndose incómodo con su madre y siempre quiso velar por su hermana, ya sea tratando de defenderla cuando su madre de enojaba con ella o pasandole comida cuando su madre la castigaba sin comer, los mellizos tienen un vínculo fuerte y siempre tienen la espalda del otro desde que tienen memoria.

Hazel es una muchacha tímida y mansa debido al trato de su madre, que hizo que temiera las interacciones sociales con su vida y que no soportará que la gente le gritase, hazel tiene claros problemas con su autoestima ya que se considera no importante y siempre prioriza a los demás por sobre si misma al creer que los problemas de otros son su responsabilidad.

Hazel es muy gentil y dulce, siendo alguien bastante tierna para los que la conocen y una gran amiga, muchos consideran su temperamento afable digno de una princesa.

Sammy es un himbo, el no es la bombilla más brillante del lugar pero tiene un gran corazón y es todo lo contrario a la masculinidad toxica, llegando a ser bastante querido por la gente de su dormitorio y tiene una gran capacidad social para hacer amigos en segundos.

Sammy trata de ser independiente de su madre y siempre es claro con su hermana con que sus atenciones lo incomodan, por esto mismo Sammy tiene reglas muy estrictas con su espacio personal estando en nrc.

Sammy se hace amigo de silver el momento en el que llega a diasomnia, siendo Sammy alguien que lo sigue a todas partes como un cachorro perdido y silver le agrada su optimismo y energía, aparte de que Sammy se asegura de que silver no se duerma en las clases y silver ayuda a Sammy con materias que no entiende.

Sammy hace que silver conozca a su hermana al llevarlo con el a uno de los recitales de ballet de hazel ya que su madre no iba a aparecer de nuevo y no queria ir solo, depsues del espectáculo ellos logran tener una conversación donde silver logra mantenerse despierto sin problemas y tiene una charla con hazel sobre equitación, ya que hazel adora los caballos pero su madre se niega a pagarle clases de equitación(pese a que si se las paga a su hermano) y silver ofrece a enseñarle sin costo alguno, lo que hazel acepta.

Silver y hazel forman una amistad a través de la equitación, que ayuda a hazel a sentirse más segura con hablar más de sí misma y poder ser más asertiva, y la presencia de hazel ayuda a silver a estar más activo y que no se duerma con tanta facilidad.

Silver suele tratar a hazel como una flor delicada ya que considera que sus actitudes son similares a las de una princesa, lo que no para de hacer sonrojar a hazel ya que no está acostumbrada a recibir atención de chicos, mucho menos de chicos tan caballerosos como silver, a quien ve como un caballero en brillante armadura(literalmente).

Su dinámica amorosa es literalmente caballero y princesa, silver es muy paciente y protector con hazel y hazel siempre se siente segura con silver.

Sammy se toma la relación con humor y felicidad, ya que piensa que la influencia de silver ayuda muchísimo a su hermana a ser más confiada y está más que feliz de que silver pase tiempo con ella(el quiere que se casen algún día).

[wmb-salticidae]

Let's Read "Teachings of the Book of Mormon" by Hugh Nibley (and consider Mormon Xianxia) #2

Introduction + Master Post

<== Last Post: 1:1 The Book of Mormon—Like Nothing Else || Introduction

1:2 Nephi's Heritage || Introduction

One thousand years of history ("history") in a nutshell: Around 600 BC, a couple of extended families flee Jerusalem before the city falls to the Babylonians. They wander for a bit, build some ships, and sail to the Americas, where they set up a society, divided roughly into Good Guys and Bad Guys. Things happen, and the kings and priests of the Good Guys keep a record of those things. Around AD 400, the Bad Guys overrun the Good Guys, and the last surviving Good Guy priest, "Moroni," lives on the run for the rest of his life.

Moroni has a lot of time on his hands, though, so he creates an abridged version of all the records he's got, with guidance from God. The Book of Mormon was written for its own people, but it was abridged for us, the people of the 19th 20th 21st century.

Autobiographical literature

In the Book of Mormon proper, the first character we're introduced is a guy named "Nephi," who belongs to the couple of families I mentioned above. He's old at the time that he gets to writing, and he's writing an account of his life, because he's seen some important shit that he wants his descendants to remember. He's going to end up writing two books, "The First Book of Nephi" and "The Second Book of Nephi."

Nephi begins his account by writing, "I, Nephi," which Nibley uses to launch into an account of autobiographical literature in Egypt. He refers to several accounts, but for the sake of brevity I'll refer to just one, "The Autobiography of Kai."

Nibley is very interested in the parallels between Kai and Nephi (you can read Nephi's self-introduction here if you're curious): they declare who they are, give an account of their upbringing, establish their moral reputation, etc. What's particularly interesting to me is how Nibley refers to skin color.

Race and skin color in Mormonism

Mormonism has a complicated relationship with race, by which I mean "non-white people commonly possessed an inferior social position in the early Mormon church, there are ways in which this persisted into relatively modern times, and the main Mormon church largely refused to acknowledge that there was a problem until a few years ago." The most notable example is the prohibition on black men from receiving priestly authority. In a church composed almost entirely of lay clergy, and which ordained all "worthy men" to some degree of priestly rank and expected them to perform as priests to their spouses and children, this not only locked black men out of administrative positions and many teaching positions but made it impossible for them to do what the church said that a "real man" was supposed to do. This lasted from about 1852 to 1978.

Besides this specifically anti-African prejudice (literally anybody but a Black African could enter the priesthood: Chinese or Pacific Islander, Mexican or Aboriginal Australian), colorism ran through Mormonism from the beginning until relatively recent times: not just that black skin was the mark of Cain or that everyone in Heaven would have white skin, but that the descendants of dark-skinned families would have lighter and lighter skin.

We're going to see this in the Book of Mormon itself — good people being "white and fair and delightsome," and bad people being cursed with "skins of blackness" — but Nibley argues that this is purely symbolic, and he points to Kai to do it. In the PDF that I linked above, Kai describes himself as "bright of face, good of character, open-hearted, free of darkness." Here's what Nibley says about that:

It doesn't refer to skin color at all, but there's a lot about race in the Book of Mormon. That comes in here already; we can see that. But here, you notice he used those peculiar terms. He was ḥḏ ḥr. He has a picture of a white face (white of countenance). And he was clean of body, and he eschewed snk.wt (what is greedy or what is dark of countenance).

As far as I can tell, this is a legitimate interpretation. The PDF says "bright of face" and "free of darkness," but as best as I can tell as a non-expert with Google, Nibley's interpretation (of the Autobiography Kai) is valid.

But this is serendipity. This is the Oxford Solar Myth. This is when I find just the right couple of nuggets to tie Rowena Ravenclaw to Macbeth in my Harry Potter fanfiction.

In the future we're going to see pretty clearly that when the Book of Mormon says "skin color," it's being literal. But I appreciate Nibley's attempt. I would have liked for him to not be a Mormon in the first place and to expend his energies on something other than religious apologetics, but I think it's worth acknowledging that, as much as he tried to defend Mormonism, he also tried to make Mormonism into something that was defensible.

Nibley's defining flaw is rampant parallelism. Besides the survey on Egyptian autobiography literature, Nibley provides an excellent example when he refers to the Odyssey and the Aeneid in order to make a generalization about heroic epics:

Notice, these start out with the fall of a great city, every one of them. This starts out with the collapse of Jerusalem. […] It's the theme of a man looking for a promised land. The city has been destroyed because of its wickedness. That's the way the Book of Mormon starts out. This leads us to a very interesting phenomenon that we find in the Book of Mormon and everywhere else. That is what I call the recurrent scenario. The same things are happening all the time, and you will find them happening all the time in the Book of Mormon. This is a very good check, a very good control on things (the recurrent scenario) because things do recur at various levels.

(I sincerely doubt that anybody here will be tempted to convert to Mormonism, but if you do begin to feel a burning in your bosom, then remember that you're only seeing what Nibley wants you to see, and then go talk to your general practitioner)

Nibley is also very excited about mystery cults, and no wonder.

A mystery is a thing you cannot find out or learn about by your own resources. Since it's a thing you can't possibly find out for yourself, it must have been revealed—either as a primordial revelation in the beginning and handed down, or it has been revealed to you or somebody else. And when you hear about it, you are always warned, "Don't talk about these things."

Nibley suggests that Nephi has been initiated, in one manner or another, into a kind of mystery cult, and that Nephi is leaving a record for other people that have been initiated into the same mysteries.

Reformed Egyptian and other languages

Language is rather important in the Book of Mormon, and it comes up as early as the second verse of the first chapter, when Nephi says, "I make a record in the language of my father, which consists of the learning of the Jews and the language of the Egyptians." This "language of the Egyptians" is what the Book of Mormon will later call "reformed Egyptian," and which Nibley identifies as the Demotic Script, which he claims was developed around 600 BC (Wikipedia bears this out). He also makes comparisons between the "Meroitic script" and the "Anthon transcript," the latter being a slip of paper on which Joseph Smith wrote some of the symbols from the Book of Mormon (in its untranslated form) and which was purportedly shown to a classical scholar named Charles Anthon. For the life of me I don't know which "Anthon transcript" Nibley is referring to: there are two, but one doesn't match the description that Anthon himself gave and the other is a modern forgery and was known to be a forgery at the time of Nibley's lectures.

In connection to "reformed Egyptian," Nibley talks about the relationship between the Egyptians and the Hebrews, from Abraham to Joseph and so on. Nibley draws a map to situate the drama: here's Egypt, here's the Sea of Galilee, etc. He briefly mentions Akhenaten (the transcript reads as "Ikhnaton") and claims that the Pharaohs preceding him were "just as monotheistic and pious as he, but he had a tremendous ego." He talks about the Akkadians, Hittites, Sea Peoples, and so on, talking occasionally about their languages (particularly, which languages were lingua franca) and gives us this gem:

What did the Hittites speak? They spoke a language like Welsh, very close to our own language.

This isn't completely absurd — Hittite is an Indo-European language — but the life of me I don't know why he chose Welsh, particularly to say that it is "very close to our own language."

One final note: Nibley believes that everything is cyclical.

All the cities had names similar to their names today. Beirut was called Bayrut (it hasn't changed much). And there were the same riots in the streets that there are today. The picture does not change; this is the point.

This is why the Book of Mormon can have material that is applicable to our day.

Morcult Corner

The idea of describing and referring to skin color in a symbolic way is something that I'm not going to touch with an eleven-foot pole, but this concept that "the text says X, but it means Y" is something that comes up a lot in Book of Mormon discourse. See, for example, the occasional claims that when the Book of Mormon says "horse," it means "tapir." I already have a preference for adapting preexisting vocabulary, thanks to Gene Wolfe and a general affection for wordplay, and I'd like to double-down on that in Morcult. I might use strange new words for personal names, but if there's a bizarre creature that fills some of the roles of a horse — people often ride it for transportation, say — then I'm going to call it a "horse," not a "blipblap." And then, as the story goes on, you start to get a better picture of this thing: it's called a horse, but it has six legs, it is indiscriminately omnivorous, it lays eggs. Maybe I'll sometimes mash a couple of words together, e.g. "pig-dog," but I wouldn't want that to be the primary approach.

The same would apply to sapient beings. Mormon!WMB-Salticidae (hereafter and forever "Mormon!Salt") believed that it was awfully provincial to assume that all of God's children looked like humans, a view that is shared by other Mormons of a more science fictional bent. There will be humans as we know them, but I'd also like there to be "nonhuman humans" in some capacity, whether they live on some other planet, they inhabited this planet during a previous era (the emphasis on dead civilizations and archaeology in Mormonism necessitates a lot of thinking about the past in Morcult), or whatever, and they'll be considered "humans" as well, just weird humans, even if they have a radically different body plan and are almost as difficult to communicate with as a river or a mountain.

Next Post: 1:3 Geopolitics and the Rule of Tyrants, 600 B.C || Introduction ==>

[happyfeetfuryroad]

Oh my god I finally get to be annoying about Zevran YES

(This will be VERY long and rambly so read at your own risk)

Oh gosh, where do I even begin. I love Zevran so much. I think he's one of - if not THE most underrated romanceable companion in Origins (I would have put him on par with Leliana but I still hold him as a touch more underrated because Leliana already got a lot of well-deserved love in her prequel DLC and in Inquisition). Nothing against Alistair or Morrigan, I think all the LIs in Origins are solid characters with compelling friendship/romance arcs, but I feel like Zevran often goes unnoticed or underappreciated in his complexity and I think it's a damn shame. So now I get to ramble about it to compensate lol

So, I think Zevran's character can be summed-up in one of my favorite quotes from his post-bedroom dialogue:

"I shall ask nothing more of you than you are willing to give."

I feel like this is who he is in a nutshell, regardless of whether you pursue him romantically or not. He doesn't open up to you, unless you make an effort to show that you care. He rarely, if ever, demands anything of you, and will always choose the path of least resistance. He's one of the least judgmental companions, and you can befriend him with relative ease without having to bend your Warden's morality too much (as opposed to Alistair and Morrigan, who are written to be compatible with a "good" Warden and a "cruel" Warden respectively - I'm oversimplifying, but you get my point).

Most importantly, however, he has one key difference with all other Origins companions, romanceable or not: his personal quest does not unlock until you get to the late game. Zevran is not someone you can speed-date or speed-befriend, no matter how many gifts you shower him with. And on top of that, when his personal quest does unlock, he's going to turn against your Warden, and force them to kill him, if you didn't get his approval high enough. I suspect this is why many players overlook him: the game really goes out of its way to make sure you don't get to know him unless you care.

Zevran himself also goes out of his way to make sure you don't read into him too much: some people dislike him because he falls into the "non-monogamous slutty bisexual" archetype (which I get, but also let's not act like bisexuals have to be monogamous and chaste to be worthy of respect, please and thank you), but I think that's on purpose. He was raised an orphan in a brothel and then sold to an assassin guild when he was a seven year old boy, which means he's much more comfortable with sex and acting sexual than with being emotionally vulnerable. The Antivan Crows took advantage of his talents and his background, and they groomed him to use his sexuality to manipulate his victims and to get out of trouble - which is exactly what he does in his banter with the Warden's other companions.

Now, this isn't me saying that the way he behaves in-game is always okay. Zevran does regularly harrass Wynne and Morrigan in particular, and that's unacceptable behavior regardless of context. What I do want to point out, though, is that this harrassment isn't so much predatory behavior (I will expand on this later, but Zevran is easily the most mature and attentive LI when it comes to consent) as it is a toxic defense mechanism against people who he feels are trying a bit too hard to read him or his motives. He hopes that by making unwanted and obnoxious sexual advances, they'll leave him alone - and it usually works. The Warden's companions, as well as any players who don't particularly care for Zevran as a character, end up seeing him as a one-dimensional hedonistic weirdo, and he's fine with that.

Interestingly, though, he doesn't behave like this with the Warden. His sexual advances are genuine, and he's much more careful to back off at the faintest sign of rejection. Zevran has known sexual coercion all too well, and he's adamant not to let anyone repeat that experience with him. And I cannot, cannot properly stress how formative this part of his characterization has been to my lonely teen self, when I was playing this game for the first time.

Other Origins romances have some sort of pressure to them, one way or another. Alistair and Leliana follow a kind of amatonormative "fall in love first, have sex when monogamously committed" narrative, and Morrigan is an emotional wreck with commitment issues who will literally slap the Warden in the face if he doesn't break up with her despite her refusing to do it herself.

Now, I'm not saying any of this to belittle those romances, don't get me wrong! Like I said before, they're all well written characters and their romances fit perfectly with who they are as people. What I'm trying to get at is, Zevran is unique in how he refuses to pressure the Warden one way or another. All he does is offer his companionship, and then graciously accept either your acceptance or your rejection. Despite all his trauma and his terrible coping mechanisms, he still has the emotional maturity to know that he doesn't own you and that it's okay if he's not your priority. He also makes it very clear that he's against unethical non-monogamy, by calling your character out if you romance him and any of the other (monogamous) LIs at the same time. He even offers to be the one to step away because he's that much of a sweetheart who puts everyone else's happiness before his own AGH-

Again, I can't properly express what a rare, positive role model he is, for a love interest in an RPG. Stumbling across him as a teenager with zero relationship experience gave me a framework for how consent works that I will always be infinitely grateful for.

But sex is not all there is to Zevran's romance. It might seem like it because, again, he takes so long to open up compared to all other LIs - but the signs are there, even before his post-Taliesen crisis.

The poem he recites to the Warden? The one he claims was recited to him by someone he killed? Yeah. No. He 100% wrote that. He's nervous and sheepish and constantly belittles it as trash and also it conveniently rhymes in fereldan despite him operating in Antiva- It's obviously an attempt to be charming without being too vulnerable about it, and I find it... so precious. Like... come on. The man has the guts to write them a poem without even knowing if they feel anything for him besides lust. I need to lie down.

Also - and here we get into major YMMV territory, because the Warden is very much a blank canvas and their story can be interpreted in a million different ways - I haven't seen many people point out how, in relation to the Warden (especially if you play as one of the more disadvantaged origins - including the elf mage which is my favorite for reasons I don't have time to ramble about right now), Zevran can act as a more or less direct foil to Wynne, specifically.

Wynne will always criticize the Warden for their romantic involvements, but the reason for her criticism can be slightly different depending on who you're romancing. With Zevran, she can barely hide her contempt for his laid-back, pleasure-seeking attitude, and all but shames the Warden for indulging in such pleasures instead of focusing all of their energies on being the stoic, no-nonsense, and perpetually self-depriving martyr that all Grey Wardens are imagined (or expected) to be.

But this isn't just Wynne's expectation, is it? Pretty much everyone looks up to the Warden as a leader, the one who is meant to single-handedly carry on the legacy of Ferelden's Grey Wardens and gather an army against a spreading Blight. Even Alistair, his senior in the order, would rather take a backseat and let this young recruit carry the weight of the whole world on their shoulders. Even Morrigan, eventually, is revealed to have wanted something from them all along.

But Zevran? He doesn't want nor expect anything from the Warden. Sure, he wants to see the Blight destroyed as much as the next guy, but he never really puts any emphasis on the role that the Warden is expected to play in it (except for the one time he remarks about how both they and Zevran's roles are the product of a life of suffering). All he ever focuses on is how they're doing. What they want and need. If you manage to get his approval high enough without ever initiating sex, he will eventually proposition you himself, and for how flirty and silly it is, I think it's also genuinely sweet:

Zevran: "Look at you. Your weary stance. The dark circles under your eyes. Poor man, all this constant walking has gotten to you. Do you know what you need?"

Warden: "A good night's rest, maybe."

Zevran: "Hmm. I think more drastic measures are called for, here." Zevran: "My thought is this: we retire to your tent and I show you the sort of massage skills that one only learns growing up in an Antivan whorehouse."

Warden: "Are you suggesting what I think you are?"

Zevran: "If you mean to ask whether there will be more than a massage involved, allow me simply to say that you won't be disappointed with any of the techniques I've picked up over the years."

Warden: "Are you sure about this?"

Zevran: "(chuckles) What is there to fear, my Grey Warden? You deserve a little fun, do you not? If you're not of a mind, however, it is no tragedy."

Yes I did type all this out by heart why do you ask

But like... he's right. The Warden DOES deserve a little fun, dammit. They're a young, traumatized person who got forcibly drafted into a death cult after suffering a horrible personal loss and is expected to just be fine with it and suffer in silence Catholic style. Zevran is the only one seeing them struggle and offering them a moment of levity, no strings attached.

And I like to think that, as their relationship blossoms, the Warden comes to realize that they deserve better than to live like a martyr for the rest of their life. That after saving the world from the apocalypse, they deserve the happiness that their traumatic past and the Grey Wardens tried so hard to deny them. And so, after the events of Awakening and all the DLC, they finally cast away their role as a world-saving hero and embark on a quest to defeat the poison killing them from within.

Similarly, Zevran eventually realizes that he deserves love, and softness, and a happy life with someone who is caring and gentle with him. And I like to think that this is why, out of all the original LIs, he's the only one who stays by the Warden's side during the events of Inquisition.

So yeah. Zevran is wonderful. He means so much to me, a queer lad who grew up feeling as doomed and deprived as the Grey Wardens are in the game - raised to believe that happiness wasn't meant for me, that I had a higher role to fulfill that required me to suffer until the day I died. I can't begin to explain how healing it has been to play through this game, and through Zevran's journey, for all these years. When I finally met my partner, and the loneliness that the game had helped to soothe went away, it felt as if a prophecy had finally been realized. It sounds silly, and I wouldn't know how to elaborate on that, but yeah. This character means a lot to me, on a very personal and intimate level.

And as a thanks for reading through my insufferably long rambling, here is my favorite audio to come out of the pandemic. Peace out.

would y’all do me a favor? reblog this and tell me WHY your favorite dragon age companion is your favorite. this is a free pass to be annoying and rambly I wanna read some positivity

[onsiteairconditioning]

A Guide to Smart Air Conditioning

Whether you’re battling the sweltering heat of summer or the biting cold of winter, smart AC systems offer a beacon of hope. They promise tailored climate control at your fingertips. But how many of us understand these systems correctly? A handful at best. So, here’s a guide that aims to present a clear picture of your smart air conditioning system.

Even if you have no experience with air conditioners, this guide is supposed to help you figure it all out without a problem. That’s why we urge you to read this post before getting any air conditioning service in Newcastle.

Let’s dive in!

The Workings of a Smart AC:

Smart air conditioning systems are pretty complex, but let’s break it down. They have lots of parts working together behind the scenes. Understanding how they work can help you make the most of your investment.

Sensors: These are like the eyes and ears of a smart AC. They keep tabs on things like temperature, humidity, and even if someone’s in the room. This real-time info helps the system figure out the best settings.

The smart thermostat: It’s a component that connects you to your AC. With its easy-to-use buttons and ability to connect to the internet, it’s key in making your home smart.

Connectivity: Smart ACs can communicate with other smart devices in your home through the internet. That means you can control your AC from your phone, even if you’re not home.

Machine learning algorithms. These algorithms analyse all the data collected to learn your preferences and adjust settings to save energy.

Cloud computing: Smart AC systems send data to cloud-based platforms, enabling refined algorithms and improved performance. This feature gives users valuable insights into their energy usage patterns.

So, that’s how smart air conditioning works in a nutshell! When you use the AC with this understanding, you will face fewer issues with it and, thus, require fewer air conditioning services in Newcastle.

Key Benefits of Smart Air Conditioning:

In a smart AC system, there are several key benefits you should know about:

Better energy use: Smart air conditioners are super efficient. They learn from how you use them and adjust cooling to save energy. This means lower bills and a cleaner planet.

More comfort and ease: Imagine a home that always feels just right. With smart AC systems, it’s not just a dream. They learn your preferences and adjust automatically, making sure you’re always comfy.

Helping the planet: Smart ACs are great for the environment. They use less energy, which means fewer emissions. That’s good news for everyone!

Saving money: On top of all that comfort and green goodness, smart ACs can also save you money. They use less energy, so your bills go down over time. It’s a win-win!

If these benefits align with your everyday needs, you are right to get a smart air conditioning installation service in Newcastle. Remember—it’s not just about staying cool. It’s a smart choice for your comfort, your wallet, and the world we live in.

Challenges with a Smart AC:

Now, let’s talk about some challenges you might face with smart AC systems:

Initial costs and setup: While smart air conditioning can save you money in the long run, the upfront costs and installation can be a hurdle for some. So, it’s essential to weigh these against the future benefits and see if it’s a worthy investment in your case.

Security and privacy: As homes get smarter, keeping your data and system secure is vital. So, you will want to take extra steps to protect your smart AC from hackers and ensure that your personal information stays private.

Compatibility with existing systems: If you are upgrading from a traditional AC, making sure your new smart system works with your current setup is crucial. Compatibility issues could disrupt your cooling, so it’s essential to check before you buy.

Maintenance: Just like any tech, smart ACs need upkeep. Following the manufacturer’s maintenance guidelines and keeping the system in good shape is key to keeping it running efficiently over time. Also, scheduling regular air conditioning service in Newcastle will prove beneficial.

While these challenges exist, they can be managed with care and consideration. By addressing them upfront, you can enjoy the benefits of a smart AC system without any major headaches.

The Future of Smart AC:

In the future, smart air conditioners will team up with Artificial Intelligence (AI) to become even smarter. AI will help your smart AC learn better and adjust to what you like. As a result, they will get better at managing energy, which means saving more money and being better for the environment. These improvements will make smart AC systems even more helpful and eco-friendly for everyone.

Final Word:

All in all, investing in smart air conditioning is a wise decision for most people. If you need more concrete suggestions, you can talk to a qualified technician or air conditioning service in Newcastle.

For immediate assistance, try contacting Onsite Air — one of the best companies for all kinds of help related to Residential Air Conditioning Maintenance Newcastle. Whether it’s the installation of a split AC or ducted air conditioning maintenance in Newcastle, you can trust their expertise.

[blueprint-han]

[Image ID: A black picture with the title “HOW TO SUPPORT FANFICTION AUTHORS” written in bold caps lock, colored with a winter forest picture. End ID.]

Well, this post has been made countless times, but I’m making one too because I’ve seen a lot of people say they’re new to tumblr and don’t know the whole “reblogging is better than liking” rule and other stuff. So without any further ado, here are ways YOU can support the fanfiction authors. Now keep in mind this applies to almost every author out there, not just the stayblr fandom, so if you’re a silent reader (or even if you aren’t), I advise you go through this post. Warning, this is a fairly long post going into detail, so yeah. I still expect you, the readers to read this, and if you’re a writer, feel free to lmk if i’ve written smth wrong or if you want me to add something! ^^

In this post I’ll go into thorough analysis of the pros and cons of each of the methods listed here and how YOU as a reader can show the authors whose fics you read more love and motivate them to produce content.

WARNING; LONG POST! GOES INTO A DECENT AMOUNT OF DETAIL. NOT EDITED, EXCUSE ANY TYPOS.

#1 : LIKING !

I think this is basic common knowledge, and a lot of people tend to do this. When you like the post, the author sees it, you see it, and if the author has their liked posts accessible (which majority of the time they don’t), and if someone deliberately goes to check it, then they see it. See why so many authors say just liking does nothing? Only liking says “Hey, I’m gonna tell you your story is not that good by simply liking it and not sharing it with other people. :D”

♯ PROS:

You’re telling the author that you've read their fic, and either you’ve enjoyed it to a certain extent, or you’re just saving it to read for later.

Likes are seen by you, the author and anyone who has access to your likes (which, most people don’t).

♯ CONS:

If you ONLY like, you’re not really helping the author’s work reach a wide audience because this site isn’t Instagram. Reblogging is the only way people can SEE our works. I’ll cover more on that in the next section.

In a nutshell, liking is good! But you should most likely use it in a combination with the other stuff I’ve listed below, because just the like itself doesn’t really do much in giving the author any feedback or interaction on their fics.

To clear shit up; I’m not talking about those people who don’t read the story or appreciate it in the first place. I’m talking about those who appreciate the fic, like it, but don’t leave any sort of feedback to show that.

#2 : REBLOGGING !

This is SO, SO important. I cannot stress on this enough. Let me explain WHY so many writers stress on reblogging content: 

Tumblr’s tag system is inherently fucked up, and has grown more so over the year. I’m not kidding, at first, the fic either used to show up in the tags or it didn’t, but now, sometimes your fic can be REMOVED from the tags because of,,, idk tumblr tag shit. Anyways, as you can see, it’s very demotivating for authors at that point, because the major way for people to find their content and expand their blogs has been blocked.  

Due to this reason, tumblr authors need to RELY on you, their followers to help spread their works to a wider audience. Now again, before you get me wrong, I’m not saying you ae forced to rb our works regardless of whether you like them or not. BUT, that being said, if you DO infact like the story, there’s no harm in reblogging, right? By doing this you’re indirectly telling the author — “hey! :D I liked your fic! Which is why I am gonna share it to my followers so they can read it too :D” Trust me, you’re doing nothing but helping the people who produce content for you to read. Seems like a worthy cause to hit the reblog button, right? It’s only a one, or maximum two step procedure.

Leave tags in your reblogs! Trust me, as an author myself and as much as I know from all my author friends, we oft check the tags of your reblogs to see if you found any part amazing or even if you have anything to say about the writing we put so much hard work into. Even a key smash or a “This was so [insert adjective] 🥺” is enough to leave a smile on your authors face. 

♯ PROS :

You’re !! Sharing !! Your authors !! Works !! This leads to them getting more recognition, so for the content they’re so graciously providing for free, you’re promoting their blog and helping them expand it.

If the tags are being a shit, which majority of the time they are, then you’re literally making an author’s day by reblogging! You’re showing them that you, a follower and appreciator of their works are willingly sharing their content because it deserves to be seen by more people. Again before any dumb people decide to attack me, i am talking about people who like the fic but don't bother reblogging and are silent/ghost readers. I am not forcing anyone to read anybody’s work.

YOU’RE MAKING YOUR AUTHOR SO HAPPY WHAT MORE REASONS COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT !! 🥺

♯ CONS :

Literally none, because as far as I remember no author is against reblogging of their works. It’s quite literally the way this platform functions. Reblogging is IMPORTANT.

#3 : COMMENTING/SENDING FEEDBACK !

This kind of overlaps with the previous section, but THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT STEP !! When you leave feedback, you are directly giving the author something so much more valuable to them than high follower/note counts or money. Your feedback is literally our serotonin. I kid you not the number of times I’ve received a positive comment and smiled and it has made my day. There’s a reason youtubers (though not the best example, bear with me here because it was the only one I could think of) ask people to subscribe, like and COMMENT. The subscription is like a follow, the like is ofc like a heart, and the comment is equivalent to an rb with comments in the tags. 

You might argue and tell me that a comment is basically like an ask so the reblogging step isn’t necessary, but I’m sure 99% of you use YouTube and you know that more comments leads to people’s videos boosted in the stream/trending charts. This is what reblogging does. Reblogging shares the piece with other people like minded, which leads to a boost in reads. You are literally helping your author grow.

It’s quite literally the same thing as youtubers. Youtubers NEED validation to keep their content creation going, so do writers, so do other ccs on this site. This post is however, focused on WRITERS, so keep that in mind.

♯ PROS :

By doing this, you’re giving author valuable feedback! It’s similar to what you do in rbing with tags. Interactivity with their fics boosts their note counts and helps expand their audience, so srsly, now think of it: your one comment is playing such a massive role to help ccs create more content.

Imagine how much of a difference the note counts will be in when every person who simply likes after reading the fic, reblogs, leaves a comment and sends an ask. the note counts would be high on each and every fic, which is validation in itself, but your comments would inspire the writer so much more! Please, don’t skip the commenting part. Even a simple one like: “this is so cute!” is wonderful. 

♯ CONS :

Remember, if you’re gonna give constructive criticism (which I’m sure you all are smart enough to know if different from hate), make sure the author is okay with it. Authors need to be in a specific mindset and must be ready to accept criticism, so if you’re gonna give constructive criticism to them when they’re at a low point, it may demotivate them.

Just commenting, instead of reblogging and commenting in the tags/ reblogging and then leaving an ask in their inbox, while it gives validation in plenty, will not lead to the author’s work being spread. Therefore I suggest either reblogging and commenting in the tags or reblog and then leave an ask, or comment under the fic!

!! reminder; I am not saying that if you don’t rb and just leave feedback, your feedback has no value. We authors truly appreciate every bit of feedback, but this post is aimed to help you learn how to interact with and support authors, and make them feel more motivated, because the current scenario of liking and scrolling is taking a toll on their creative abilities. Take it from a person who’s been writing for a year.

#4 : COMMSIONING VIA THEIR KO-FI/OTHER APPS !

Before any of you attack me, let me tell you that this is not a step that is 100% necessary to do. ONLY donate if you can and if you genuinely want to, and if anyone is forcing you to pay for something against your will, you need to get yourself out of there.

Regardless, if an author has a kofi and you’re able to and you want to donate, you definitely should! It’s also a valid form of support.

#5 : ADDING THEM ON REC LISTS/ RECOMMENDING THEM TO REC BLOGS

This is such an underrated option, to be honest. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen my fic was recommended onto some rec list and it’s made me smile so hard. If you like some fics, create a rec list! They’re oft very popular amongst the fans too. Making rec posts is such a great way to share your favorite stories with others. 

Rec blogs! I’ve seen a couple going around, and needless to say they are a great way to get someone else to read your favorite author’s work whilst also giving them your own feedback. These blogs oft accept recs via a form or ask box, and they leave your feedback along with their own, or else they’ll oft tag the author in the feedback post, so look! You’re basically helping your author share their fic to many more people, because you’ve given them feedback and a reblog.

♯ PROS :

Validation! Feedback! Reblogs! More exposure! Helping a blog grow! Spreading love! basically a run down of the stuff I’ve said before!

♯ CONS :

Literally no con of this. Unless, a one in a million case, this author says they don’t like receiving feedback/being tagged, and I’m sure NO person has said this before, at least none that I’ve heard of.

#6 : FINAL COMMENTS; MISC !

When an author points out about how the interactivity is drastically reducing, don’t just give them blind apologies. Yes, you feel sorry for not interacting as much, we understand, but rather show that you’ll become a better content consumer through your actions. We need to see that we’re not just throwing words into a void and that people are actually trying to be better content consumers. 

Understand the fact that authors don’t get paid for this, and 99% of the time, these authors don’t take commissions either. They’re giving you novel worthy writings for free. Take Percy Jackson: You think the author would have felt motivated to write the subsequent parts, let alone two whole series based off of it if literally no one showed that they were interested? Rick Riordan has sales, he is being paid, there are millions of people and big agencies who provide him feedback. Now take that huge amount and simmer it down to an audience of maybe 10000 people This is what fanfic authors want. They don’t want your money, nor are they telling you to risk your lives for them. All they want is, a reblog, some tags, some feedback, some INTERACTIVITY.  A sign that they aren’t throwing fics into the void and that people actually like them, some motivation to continue. Seems fairly easy to throw an rb with some tags, right?

Don’t bother to tell me that we do this for ourselves and we shouldn’t ask for likes and reblogs and feedback, because 1) you are consuming the content that we “write for ourselves” and 2) writers post their content here for interactivity and feedback. We could just not post and write and save our fics in our dungeon drafts for years. But we choose to post to entertain the readers, the consumers. And we aren’t even asking that much in return.

Don’t give me the whole “I’m scared that authors feel that comments are annoying” excuse either because seriously this has been DEBUNKED SO MANY TIMES. Istg, in the nicest way possible, if you still think writers are annoyed by interaction and feedback, after so many posts, long rants have been posted as to how we’re not, then you must truly be living under a rock. There, I said it. Please stop thinking this way, I’ll say it again, AUTHORS ARE NOT ANNOYED OF FEEDBACK, COMMENTS, TAGS, REBLOGS. WE LOVE IT. Saying this is like saying that the audience in a theatre play shouldn’t clap when the play ends because the actors would find it noisy. 🤡

I’ve seen some people saying they have anxiety issues and such, so pls note that I’m not invalidating your condition. If you’re trying to be more interactive, I really appreciate it! If you can’t, that’s fine too. You’re trying.

But for the people who have no reason other than feeling lazy to rb and comment, your lack of interactiveness is not excused. Please. Tumblr is a reblogging site. If you’re gonna consume content like authors are some sort of machines, I encourage you to go get some more perspective.

This site is not Instagram or the satan bird app. Your likes are appreciated but frankly speaking, they do nothing to the author except tell them “Hey i read ur fic but i'm not gonna support u :D” and honestly, that is detrimental to their creative capabilities and mental health. 

DON’T FOLLOW AN ACC JUST TO MINDLESS RB THEIR SIGNAL BOOST POSTS AND THEIR REBLOGS OF GIFS AND NOT INTERACT WITH THEIR WRITING AT ALL ! Trust me, authors prefer a lower amount of interactive followers than a high count that doesn’t even give them any feedback. Again your follows are appreciated, but when you’re following, you know the type of content the author creates, so the author expects that the more followers, the more interactivity. These days, this is just becoming the opposite. So don’t do it! If you’re gonna follow to read, interact with their works. I promise, this will make both you and the author happy. A win-win situation.

In conclusion: SUPPORT YOUR FUCKING AUTHORS! THEY ARE NOT MACHINES THAT HAVE NO FEELINGS TO PRODUCE CONTENT FOR YOU! FICS TAKE DAYS AND DAYS OF PLANNING, PLOTTING, OUTLINING, WRITING, EDITING, MAKING TEASERS. SO JUST SHOW THEM YOU APPRECIATE THEM WITH AN RB. IT’S THE L E A S T YOU CAN DO.

I will be liking this post here written by the lovely @chaninfused​ and @scriptura-delirus​ . Please take time to read it because if you weren’t convinced by my arguments, you will see how much frustration we as writers face on a daily basis. Please, just show support. Here is the post by @stayndays​ about how to get more people to read your work, because it also has a note on reblogging. Please educate yourself, and put an end to this mindless consuming culutre and bring up some interactivity.

If you’ve read this far, I want you to go to two of your favorite authors and leave some feedback in their inbox, and tag me in it (either tag me yourself or ask the author to do so, they won’t mind). Show your writers that our words are taking effect and you are becoming better consumers. I mean it. I’m serious. I want every single one who reads this post to do this. besides valid reasons, if you’re lazy to do this, you’re a part of the problem. PLEASE get more perspective.

Also, feel free to add to this post! I’d love to read your thoughts too, remember to be kind though. And, if I think your rb is somehow contradicting my points and is bringing down the reason I made this post, I will politely ask you to delete your comment, because this post is about being truthful about the harsh reality of tumblr consumers and how we can change it. I’m sure none of you will let it get to that point, though. <3 love you guys. 💓

And, just a reminder, don’t just blindly like this too. Do what I said before, and while I am not forcing you, I’d appreciate your reblog, because seriously, it took me 3 whole days to write this, plus, I’m sure this will help more of your followers understand the fault in consumer culture. haha, that’s it! This post was way too long uff.

also, this is ur cue to not be stupid in my inbox. You have something to say? Think I worded smth wrongly? I’m sure it wasn’t my intention to do so, point it out with manners. 

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

Happy Birthday Seokjin!

Truly I am so grateful that Seokjin is part of Bangtan and that we got to meet him, still get to know him more with the passage of time, and are blessed by his beautiful personality and charm. There are so many things that could be said about him, so much praise, and he would deserve all of it and so much more.

Personally he inspires me so much with the way he carries himself and the way he views the world, realistic yet without losing a sense of wonder even if it shows in different ways from some of the other members, how he moves through his days and through schedules (based on what we see and hear), and the gentle care he puts into the things he cares about and the people he loves. I love the fact that he knows what he wants, that he knows how important it is to rest sometimes and will take the time to just do...nothing, or something that others would deem as “waste of time” simply because he enjoys it, like playing video games. He’s so incredibly intelligent, both in the sense of being smart but also on an emotional level, it’s awe-inspiring.

But he’s also incredibly hard working and dedicated, and he brings those around him so much joy. He isn’t afraid to do something a little embarrassing, like attaching RJ to the back of his head for the encore or coming on stage with mini space buns because he knows we’ll love it, or to pretend that he fell so that Tae, who actually fell on the red carpet, wouldn’t be embarrassed on his own. He’s introverted and shy and yet he still takes it upon himself to put himself out there, to crack jokes to lighten the mood and participate in interviews and red carpet moments, even in English, to help the other members and especially Namjoon. And in return his members love him so endlessly, just like ARMY does.

Cute, he asked. The absolute cutest and best, I answered.

Seokjin having grown so much since debut could possibly best be showcased through the masterpiece that is Super Tuna, and I mean that wholeheartedly and not at all ironically. “I spoke with Son Sungdeuk and asked if it was okay to do this. He said he wasn't sure because we were superstars now and putting out something of this kind of quality may be odd. But I thought it would be fun. Please don't criticize it too much and please just enjoy it.” (Seokjin Birthday Vlive, trans. ryuminating) Truly, any tongue that dares rise against Super Tuna shall fall.

I’m so glad that Seokjin stood his ground and here we are. A song about fish and fishing created simply for fun, for giggles, using things he said while finishing as inspiration. It’s like Namjoon creating Bicycle but in like a supercharged version with a trot feeling to it.

It’s brave, unapologetic, creative, confident and marvelous--Seokjin, in a nutshell.

Can we also talk about the range that Seokjin has music wise? In a years’ time we went from the deep soul-searching ballad beauty that is Abyss to Super Tuna, so drastically different, two opposite ends of the music spectrum, yet both of them are so very Seokjin. I love it and him so much. 

Using this occasion, I thought it would be a good chance to share something I wrote (but never got to finish and post) about something that Seokjin spoke about in his BE-hind Interview with JK a long time ago:

One thing that particularly stuck out to me about this interview, which of course has immediately been misconstrued and twisted for the sake of a narrative by some people (don’t let me get into it because I’ll never stop yelling), is how content he is with his “clean” voice which he believes to not be “special” (which I don’t agree with but that isn’t the point). This is so valuable and such a good way of thinking. Some say he was being modest, which surely is part of it, while others that he’s being negative toward himself, which might be part of it, too, but I don’t actually believe that to be the case. I think with the way society treats creative people right now, how your talents are only worthy of being seen and showcased when you’re the best, the most talented, your voice is the most special and outstanding, your music the most genius and innovative, your art the more outstanding there ever was—basically you feel like your creativity is only valid if it can be/is accompanied by a superlative.

But in comes Seokjin, worldwide handsome silver voice Seokjin collecting praise left, right and center for his vocals, who says these things about his voice.

This is shining a light on many things, but especially on how you can be happy with having a voice that (according to you) isn’t a superlative but that suits you and works well for you, but also how truly far hard work can take you. After all, Seokjin wasn’t a singer when he became a trainee, he basically unlocked a talent that was already within him and then put in the years and countless hours of work to elevate what was already there to become who he is today vocal wise. That’s admirable and presents talent was not the magical nebulous idea that people have—basically you’re either born talented or you should just give up—but something you have to work for, put in the time and effort and you don’t need to be the next Freddie Mercury (though his imitation at Wembley was still amazing, like come on) to be a good singer, to be worthy of being heard.

Another thing that this did was taking a step away from “old” Seokjin, the one that only ever wanted to show us his happy side while keeping anything negative away from us, and the “new” Seokjin who’s willing (and trusts us enough) to tell us about feeling blue and writing Abyss in a time when he literally didn’t want to do anything at all to put his emotions into something, who shares his opinion on his voice with us, despite knowing how some might react yet being confident enough that we’ll still understand him. This shows how much he’s grown as both person and as artist, show a very human side of him, shows that at the end of the day, despite the fortune and fame, he’s a person like any of us who worked hard to become the artist he is today, who’s still working on his talents, still growing, who still has so much more space to grow into and more aspects of his voice and musical skills to explore, and I am immensely grateful for the fact that he’s done this.

[talkingtea]

they are pr. everything about them screams pr. i mean everything. there are toooo many red flags for them to be real. and the timing is to suspect. their stories always changing. everyone around them promoting her kindergarten workout routines. the buying of the likes and followers and buying that blue check. there is so much more, like i would be here all day listing all the shit that makes them pr. and it will end because even if they put all this time and energy into this pr bs, he is done. you can see it in his attitude. he is done. and if he cared about the public image he would be on social media posting about her and this damn pregnancy the way he did when they got “got together” and “engaged” and “married”. my opinion. this pr stunt hit a point that he didn’t want and he is showing that. which is why i don’t believe they got pregnant the normal way and why i don’t believe he was in on this plan of hers. he is to unattached and disconnected. my opinion

That’s it in a nutshell. Why would buy that anything about their relationship is legitimate when they lie about it all the time and use it shamelessly for PR? It’s not like Grant and LA had a normal relationship and she was so interesting and star-worthy that she attracted attention that she wasn’t seeking and they decided to capitalize off of it. No, she went actively trying to get it and he helped her do it. From day one. The only reason she’s not A-list famous is because she’s dull as dishwater and no one is interested in her outside of Grant. It damn sure wasn’t because of a lack of trying.

[jenniboo311]

GQ: Spider-Man Goes Undercover on Reddit, YouTube, and Twitter

GQ: Spider-Man Goes Undercover on Reddit, YouTube, and Twitter by jenniboo311

Part 2 of the Social Butterfly Spidey series General |  4115 Words  |  Chapter 1/1

---------

The video opens with Spider-Man sitting at a table with only his torso visible, the set background a solid sky blue. He is wearing his signature mask and a simple white t-shirt, forearms bare and defined with lean muscle. He gives the camera a jaunty two fingered salute.

"Hey I'm Spider-Man," he begins in a friendly voice as he flips open the lid of the laptop in front of him decisively, "And I'm going undercover on the internet." The video cuts to a title screen as it types out "Actually Me with Spider-Man" as Spider-Man says off screen, "It's actually me!"

The screen then clears and types out a new message for its audience, "We had Spider-Man create real accounts and go undercover online."

"Let's begin!" He says as the camera cuts back to him typing into the laptop. The video shows his screen as he is typing his username and password into YouTube. Once the site logs in he selects his display picture, a cheeky shot a fan must have captured as Spider-Man swung past upside-down. "First up, let's take ourselves to YouTube."

A brief clip plays from a seven and a half minute humorous compilation of Spider-Man saves, cutting back and forth between impressive confrontations against dangerous criminals with firearms to sweetly helping older ladies with their groceries.

"From user SkepticalOfSpidey, she says," he narrates the comment as it is displayed on screen, "'Is this guy for real? How can a superhero go from dodging bullets to carrying groceries? Like how is this even on his radar? Does he actually care or is this some kind of PR stunt?'"

The video cuts to Spider-Man who replies vehemently, "I absolutely care! And I think it's hysterical people consider me "above" certain things, or they're not worthy of being on my "radar", as though I'm some hotshot. Look, the Avengers are great with the big world ending stuff, and sometimes I'm part of that too, but the little guys need help too, day to day. I'm the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man, and no matter who you are, your race, your age, your sexuality, your income, whether you're a victim of a mugging or a kitten in a tree, you all deserve help when you need it. That's my personal mission, just to help people. So as long as I'm doing that I'm not ashamed."

The video cuts to show the end of his response being typed out on screen and Spider-Man hits the "Comment" button to post his answer.

Another short clip plays of footage from the scene of a crime where Spider-Man is knocking out a hulking goon in one hit, displaying his super strength. The subsequent comment is displayed on screen as Spider-Man reads it aloud, "'oh great, just what we need: another brawny idiot that uses his fists to solve problems. What we really need is intelligence. Can we get more scientists please?'"

Spider-Man reels back in his chair a little, seemingly taken aback. "Wow! Why are you so angry-" he consults the laptop again for the username, "Chelsea?" He shifts in the chair to get comfortable before responding, "First of all, another? I'm offended on behalf of my teammates. All of the people I work with are very intelligent, so I'm not sure where she's getting that you have to be an idiot if you have muscles. Secondly, I am a scientist, actually. I specialize in biochemistry, though I also dabble in engineering, physics, and programming. I have an IQ upwards of 250, which if you want to compare to the likes of Tony Stark, is around 270, who also kicks ass by the way."

He straightens his shirt indignantly, "Though hopefully I didn't give too much away with that. My point is," he points at the camera, "you can have both brawn and brains. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise, people. Defy the societal norms."

The comment section displays on screen again and scrolls down the page until it hits another comment. "'How strong is Spider-Man?'" He lounges back in his chair and taps the fingers of his right hand on the table idly, "Well, last we checked I could bench press about ten tons. Tony and I ran some tests about eight months ago to find out, so it could have changed since then but likely not by a large amount. So I'm going to say ten tons, give or take."

Another video clip plays that shows Spider-Man swinging confidently on his web before suddenly taking a wrong turn and eating billboard. The jarring collision dislodges his grip and he falls several feet to land on a garbage bin, whose lid caves in immediately under his weight. He reads aloud, "'Ouch. I wonder how that felt.'" Spider-Man laughs quietly, not afraid to laugh at himself. "To be honest with you Joshua, it did not feel good. That billboard actually broke my nose, though the garbage bin helped break some of the fall. There's definitely worse things I could have landed on. I don't get distracted often but it still happens sometimes. Web slinging is hard, okay?!

"Wikipedia!" he says off screen, as the visual on screen shows Spider-Man logging in to the Wikipedia webpage with the username, 'itsactuallyspiderman@gmail.com'.

"Let's see here," Spider-Man says before devolving into mumbles as he reads the information supplied on the website about himself. "Wait wait wait!" He exclaims after a moment and quotes the offending fact, "'His signature weapon is his webbing, which is created biologically and dispensed from a gland in his wrists at the base of his palms.'" The text in question displays on screen and zooms in on the text, "biologically", and then, "gland in his wrists".

"First of all, gross." Spider-Man rests his forehead in his hand, propped on the table with his elbow in a perfect picture of disappointment. "Second of all," he sits up straight and addresses the camera full on, "have you all actually been thinking I've been spurting real webs out of my hands at everything for the past few years?!" After a beat he processes what he has just said and facepalms while mumbling, "Spurting, oh God I regret my word choice."

The video cuts to the text being backspaced as Spider-Man narrates offscreen, "This is incorrect, let's delete it!"

The video cuts back to Spider-Man reaching below the table, leaning slightly to the left to dig something out of his right pants pocket, sighing heavily. He pulls out two simple black bracelets which he pointedly holds up for the camera before slipping them on. "Web shooters: 101," he says before deliberately knocking his wrists together so the bracelets make contact and activate. "Now obviously Tony Stark has gotten his hands on these and they are a little different than the originals, as you can tell by the nano technology," he explains, black colored metal creeping up his forearms to encase them in a type of bracer, "but the base mechanism is still the same as what I designed from the beginning." The nano technology finishes covering his forearms, the device quite noticeable with the stark black of the metal covering the majority of his pale exposed forearms. He flicks his hands back, palms facing upwards to show the camera, as the motion triggers a small device to deploy in the center of his palms. He reaches into his pocket once more and retrieves a couple small cylindrical cartridges filled with a milky fluid which he then deftly loads into the devices at his wrists.

"In a nutshell: web shooter," he holds up his left forearm to present the whole device to the audience. "The trigger," he presents the small button resting in his palm, "and web fluid," he continues, indicating the cartridge now inserted below his wrist. He points to a spot at the base of his palm, "They got the location of the dispenser right, I guess, but it's not coming out of a gland of any kind!" He aims carefully just past the camera and shoots a quick burst by depressing the button at his palm that makes the viewer feel as though he is shooting it at them. "I developed this formula myself, in a lab, with chemicals!" He emphasizes. "It's completely synthetic, not biological by any means, and nobody had to milk me for it." He pauses, staring at the camera for a moment before looking down at the table and murmuring uncomfortably while shaking his head, "That was a strange sentence I never want to repeat." He huffs a quiet laugh.

"Quora!" Spider-Man says as the onscreen graphic shows Spider-Man logging into the website with his fake email. "What the heck is Quora? I have no idea but let's get into it.

"'How is Spider-Man such a darling? He's so sweet and wholesome and is a big, soft, cinnamon roll'," he narrates as the question displays on screen. He shifts around awkwardly and scratches the side of his head, "Aw, I dunno! But thanks Quora, you're my new favorite website.

"'How many people has Spider-Man killed?'" He narrates as the question displays on screen. "Wow guys, that's dark!" He leans forward and clasps his hands together to convey the seriousness of his response. "The answer is none. I haven't killed anyone nor do I intend to. Spider-Man is strictly nonlethal. I only use webs to detain, I don't use blades or guns of any kind. Except these guns." He lightens the mood by flexing his right arm and kissing his bicep. He holds it together for approximately two seconds before exploding in laughter. "Oh God, how do I have friends?" He mutters to himself.

"Next!" He exclaims, searching for the next question. "'Does Spider-Man wear a mask because he's disfigured?'" The question displays for the viewer to see. "Hmm, okay well the short answer is no. That's not why I wear a mask. I don't really know how to quantify my own attractiveness, that's just awkward. I think I'm perfectly average, though I've had people tell me I'm handsome. They were all terribly biased though, so take that with a grain of salt." Spider-Man's grin can be seen in the crinkling of the fabric around his mouth. "I have two eyes, a nose, a mouth, and completely normal teeth. No extra eyes or mandibles or anything. That may sound like a strange thing to say but you'd be surprised how many times I have to clarify that," He snorts. "I cover my face because dealing with so many street-level criminals puts me on the radar of a lot of people who want revenge against me and anybody I care about. So if my identity was known I'd have to constantly watch my back, and my loved ones would be in danger. Of course there are contingencies for if that happens but in the meantime I want as normal a life as possible for me and mine."

Spider-Man clicks away on the laptop until the next question displays on screen. "'Does Spider-Man give autographs and selfies?'" He narrates. "I do, but all I ask is that if you catch me out in the wild and I look busy or distracted, to please not bother me. Most times the people I save are a bit too traumatized to be thinking about getting my autograph at the moment, but if the night is slow or I'm taking a break I'm happy to give an autograph or take a photo with you if you ask. Your best bet is probably at fundraisers and charity events, if I am in attendance, since I'm not focused on crime fighting and am just interacting with people."

The next question displays on screen, "'Is Spider-Man single?'" The video cuts to Spider-Man shifting uncomfortably. "Uh, I'm not comfortable confirming that sort of thing. Like I said, people in my orbit are in danger so I don't want to bring any kind of attention to who I surround myself with, even if their names are as yet unknown. The less information going around about that the better. So all I'll say is that at the very least I am not looking for a relationship." He awkwardly clears his throat before moving on.

"'How strong are Spider-Man's webs?' Strong enough to restrain the Hulk. Seriously," he nods at the camera, "I know this for a fact. We, and by we I mean the Avengers and I, had a code green sometime last year and out of sheer desperation I let the webs fly. By the time I was done he was basically in a cocoon but hey, it worked! Hulk looked pretty cozy actually." His eye lenses squint in amusement.

"Now let's go to Facebook," he says as the video shows him logging into Facebook and selecting a new profile picture, a closeup of Spider-Man shooting the camera finger guns.

"'Who would win in a race between Spider-Man and Captain America?'" He claps his hands together once in excitement, "Me! Because I'm obviously superior to Cap in every way!" He barks out a laugh and mumbles, "He'll let me have it for that comment! No I'm joking, Cap is awesome. I'm actually not lying though. We had a race, because science, and I clocked in at about two hundred miles per hour while Steve maxed at about seventy. Nothing to sneeze at of course, but not quite up to Spidey's par!" He gives another cheesy arm flex, this time with both arms. The video cuts to Spider-Man typing out the last of his answer and finishes it with two flex emojis before submitting it.

"'Do you think Spider-Man has any hidden talents?'" He looks seriously into the camera. "Well if I told you, they wouldn't be secret talents anymore, now would they Gerald?" He cocks his head to the side in thought. "I guess I can tell you that I can dance? I took dance and gymnastics for awhile when I was a kid, which is probably why I'm so agile and acrobatic now. My enhancement made me even more agile and acrobatic, but it was already there to some degree to begin with." He gives a careless shrug.

"'Coffee or tea?' Well I try not to drink either of them to be honest. Caffeine and spiders don't mix! Sometimes I can't avoid it though, lots of late nights being Spider-Man, so in those cases I drink coffee. Funny trivia for you, but I used to love lemonade. I must have inherited some spidery traits because lemon is a deterrent and I can't tolerate it now. I mean it won't kill me, I just find it unpleasant. Don't want criminals thinking they can spray me with lemon juice or something. I'll just be annoyed and smell funky fresh while I kick your ass." His eye lenses squint as his mask crinkles around the mouth. "My beverage of choice is actually apple juice, because I'm twelve years old." He snickers and hits the submit button to post his answer, complete with a baby emoji.

"'How are you doing? Are you getting enough sleep? Do you need a hug?'" He shifts forward to prop his chin on his hand. "I'm doing good, thank you for asking. I am absolutely not getting enough sleep, but neither is anyone else I know so I'm in good company. And I absolutely need a hug. I love giving people hugs and will one hundred percent hug you if you ask me to and I'm not busy. There's lots of Spidey to go around, I love each and every one of you."

He reads the next question silently first and barks a laugh before narrating, "'What even is your life?' Dude, I have no idea. If you had told young Spidey that one day he'd be flipping all over the city fighting crime and battling aliens with a superpowered team of highly skilled famous individuals he'd probably check you for fever and then back away slowly.

"Up next, Instagram! I know all about Instagram, I use it all the time." The video shows him once again logging into the website

"'Does anyone else desperately want a reality TV show with Spidey and the other Avengers? I would kill to watch hours of Spidey being a sarcastic little shit to bank robbers and Tony Stark just being a mess.'" Spider-Man laughs. "Wellllll," he hedges, "you might not have to wait that long. I've been toying with the idea of creating a YouTube channel and posting some shenanigans on there. Now, mind you, it won't be expertly edited or anything, I really don't have the time for that, but it would be something. Keep an eye out for that soon."

The video next displays a picture on Instagram that a fan had posted of a young Spider-Man from his early days coming out of a porta-potty with a string of toilet paper streaming off the bottom of his boot. The comment reads, "'Check out this disaster. What is going on here?'" Spider-Man looks straight at the camera, unimpressed, and deadpans, "Everybody poops, Deborah."

He navigates to the next picture, which is of a kneeling Spider-Man getting mauled by an enthusiastic, fluffy golden retriever. "'Was he a good doggo?'" He reads aloud. "He was best boy. What a good doggo!" He grins big through his mask.

"Now here we go to Twitter," he says as he logs in and selects a profile picture. "This is probably the social media I use the most. I'm thinking about deleting the app off my phone for a little while though, it's starting to consume my life. It's nice being able to connect to the public with it but I'm starting to find it difficult because people get so disappointed when I have to step away. Saying no to people is hard! And I have an extremely busy life so I can't keep this up forever. I've got cats to cuddle and lives to save! Gonna have to dial it back a bit I think."

The screen displays a tweet from user EmmaRox as Spider-Man reads it aloud, "'Do you think the abs are real or does he pad his suit?'" Spider-Man snorts and slaps his chest in mirth. "Well I would think that the fact I can lift a bus is proof enough, but here you go," he says and lifts his shirt to expose his impressively sculpted abs for just a moment before dropping his shirt and shaking his head in embarrassment. "Not padded."

The video cuts to the next question as he reads, "'What do you do in your free time?'" He looks at the camera and his left eye lens shifts as though he has furrowed his eye brow. "Free time? What's that?" He snorts, "No seriously, there's not much of that to go around. If I'm not on patrol or sleeping or training, I'm trying to keep up with my personal relationships and trying not to spend all my remaining time in the lab, with or without Tony. Like I said before, I'm a scientist, so a lot of my downtime is devoted to developing better tech, and to research to advance in these areas." He dramatically sweeps his hand across the top of his head as though he is a diva flipping long hair over his shoulder as he announces, "I'm not just a pretty face, you know." The video cuts to Spidey typing out the end of his answer, finishing it off with a queen emoji.

"'What's the best piece of advice you've ever been given?'" Displays the next question from user, David P. "That's a good question, David. Hmm," he strokes his chin thoughtfully, "I would have to say 'With great power, comes great responsibility'. It was advice given to me by one of the two most important people in my life, and I have carried that motto in my heart ever since. It was advice that ultimately lead to the creation of Spider-Man, actually. I have these fantastic powers, so I consider it my responsibility to do something good with them." He wrings his hands together at what looks to be an uncomfortable topic for him to speak about. After a beat he continues his answer, "The second best advice I've ever gotten, however, was 'It is better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring', which you'll also notice I take very seriously in that I am incredibly ridiculous. I mean if there's a person out there who spouts more bad puns in the face of danger than me, I haven't heard of them." He quietly snickers to himself.

"'If you had to choose three adjectives to describe yourself what would they be?'" He doesn't hesitate when he rattles off, "Genius, witty, humble." He stares at the camera seriously for a moment before he cracks and laughs. "No seriously, uh, probably awkward, smartass, and nerdy." He shrugs for lack of a better answer.

"Reddit!" He says as he logs into the page and selects a display picture of Spider-Man facepalming.

"'Do you have any pets?'" Spider-Man reads. "No. My apartment doesn't allow pets, sadly, but I love animals. And actually I do hang out with Tony a lot and I have to constantly make sure he's fed and watered because he forgets, so I feel like that's close enough." He covers his mouth with a hand to hold in his snort but a strangled one escapes anyway.

The next post shows a piece of fan artwork that is poor quality and is obviously from an inexperienced child. It depicts a heroically posed Spider-Man saving a young boy from a burning apartment complex window. The young artist in question posted the caption, "'I know it's not any good but spiderman saved me and my mom from a fire. I really want to say thank you so I drew him this picture. If anyone gets the chance to talk to spiderman can you please show him this and tell him I love him?'" Spider-Man looks at the picture on the laptop for a long moment and audibly takes several loud swallows. He looks at the camera and says hoarsely, "I love you too, bud. And I'm glad you're doing okay. It was my absolute pleasure to help you that day and I'm so glad I was there. I love your drawing and I think you're so very talented. I'm going to print this out and post it on my fridge so I can see it everyday and think of you. Study hard in school and be good for your mom!" He looks down at his lap and clears his throat, filling with emotion. After a moment he looks up and clasps his hands.

"That's it! We're done!" He says as he shuts the laptop with a snap and his eye lenses squint in a smile. "I hope you enjoyed watching and learning a little bit about me. See you around!"

The video fades to the GQ logo before ending.

--------------------------------

Comments: ----------------

magicalbluecookies omg that last one killed me. Spidey got all choked up Friedfishcat I live for Spidey telling us he loves us. I stan a Spiderboi not afraid of his emotions. kitty22803 Am I the only one who took a screenshot of his abs? TeamIronDad Bahahaha subtly roasting cap and iron man. I wanna be a fly on the wall of their common room, I bet they're all hilarious to watch together lovelyjourneys Does this cinnamon roll ever rest? He needs a nap! And some milk or something! saucysquatch "Everybody poops, Deborah." Dumbledork I will die if he actually makes a youtube channel, please actually make this a thing! enchanted_nightingale Nooooooo dont delete twitter! kim_cc I once got a hug from spidey!! I was crying after he saved me from almost getting hit by a car and he asked if i needed a hug. It was the best hug of my life. Isi1dur Spidey is 12 years old confirmed, someone call the press xoxheartErin Spidey, post a video of you dancing!!! Proof or it didn't happen! Slyrocker Spiderman is asked how's he's such a soft cinnamon roll, proceeds to then prove he's a soft cinnamon roll Hi NOBODY HAD TO MILK ME FOR IT UselessDiamond19 Holy crap his web shooters are so cool! chrissyglikesbooks 250?! His IQ is 250?! Einstein was 160!!!! I feel faint. amillionmiles Spidey eating that billboard is about how my week is going honestly Mira Spidey is such a smart boi! He's going to make a great husband when I marry him.

TotallyNotDeadpool Well I guess this is all we have to live for now that you're out of the MCU

[agentnico]

The Devil All the Time (2020) Review

For some this is a dark and gritty gothic crime drama. For others, it’s Spider-Man, Pennywise, The Winter Soldier, Alice from Wonderland, Dudley and Edward Cullen in a movie together! 

Plot: Sinister characters converge around a young man devoted to protecting those he loves in a post-war backwoods town teeming with corruption and brutality.

In a normal year, this film would be right in the centre of the film festival circuit, playing out screenings in Cannes, Venice, Toronto.... But as we all are very much aware, this is no normal year. Instead, this Academy Awards hunting motion picture gets a small release on a small little streaming service some of you might have heard of known as Netflix. However the calibre of entertainment of Netflix really has improved in the past few years. Whenever a new film is announced to be released on the streaming service, you can actually look forward to possibly enjoying an actually well made movie. With The Devil All the Time, the movie hits all the notes for an awards worthy contender, however it’s a movie that’s inspired by other greats that came before it, and stars a talented cast all of which are great, but have proven to be if not more great previously. 

With notes of Coen Brothers and Paul Thomas Anderson lingering in every shot, director Antonio Campos captures the rawness and lifeless nature of the west really well, and even story notes remind one of No Country for Old Men and There Will Be Blood, especially the latter, as this movie leans heavily into religious symbolism, questioning what it means to be one with God, and that even the most holy of men from the outside may be the ultimate deceivers on the inside. So, in a nutshell, The Devil All the Time is about bad people. Just a load of no-gooders, each worse than the other, and all of them exemplifying acts of hypocrisy left and right. Some are more straightforward criminals, who go around committing serial murders and getting enjoyment out of it, then there are others who carry out malice through manipulation and intimidation. It’s a world of kill or be killed. So, like, this movie is very deep, you guys! Really gets down into the human psyche. Or at least it tries. Don’t get me wrong, the movie is impeccably filmed, with fantastic performances (more on them later) and extremely well paced - the duration clocks in at over 2 hours and the movie is truly a slow burner, but you never find yourself bored. There’s always something interesting going on, whether through dialogue or character expressions or tension building from the notes of Saunder Jurriaans’ eerie western music score, you do find yourself engaged and invested throughout. However, once the credits begin rolling, you do wonder what really is the point of it all? Is there anything the movie is trying to say, besides “oh look at all of these bad folk and their bad folk ways!” After much thought on the subject, I honestly think that’s really it. The movie paints humanity as a bunch of psychopaths, which at the end of the day isn’t far from the truth, and that’s really the message of it all. Personally I expected a bit more from the movie besides the obvious, but hey-ho, it is what it is.

As mentioned prior, the performances are off the charts here. All actors are on their A-game, and it’s a case of every performer stealing the show whenever they are on-screen. Tom Holland shows his much darker side in comparison to his web-slinging ways; Robert Pattinson is repulsively vile and weird; Bill Skarsgard brings emotional heft nothing like his whimsical It shenanigans; Riley Keough and Jason Clarke make for a decent murderous take on Bonnie and Clyde; and Harry Melling shows inspiration from Paul Dano in There Will Be Blood for his lost-from-reality preacher part. Yes, there are a lot of There Will Be Blood similarities in The Devil All the Time. Like a lot a lot. One can additionally argue that the female cast is under-used, with the likes of Haley Bennett and Mia Wasikowska passing by only fleetingly, though the counter-argument may be that the film is trying to communicate that this is a world of evil men, not deserved of a female’s touch.

This movie is undoubtedly divisive. I see many absolutely loving this thing for its artistic value, and then on the other hands others who may be bored or confused by the movie’s slow tone and messy anthology-like plot, but I myself really enjoyed watching it, if not left questioning the movie’s purpose. Nevertheless, I can recommend it, and a must-watch for those questioning if Pattinson’s high pitch Southern accent is worth to be bestowed.

Overall score: 7/10

[idrewbedraggledbreaths]

Sorting Daenerys Targaryen and Jorah Mormont with the sortinghatchats system (GoT verse)

I didn’t want to write this post before I finished my Killing Eve sortings (basically Carolyn and Konstantin), but I’m stuck with them, so I decided to revisit an old fandom instead with a new approach. My take here is possibly an outsider’s take, given that I haven’t interacted with this fandom for a while, save for a few close friends I made in it. Now, bear in mind this sorting system IS NOT the original HP system, it is simply based on it. It sorts you into two houses. Your primary is you WHY, your reason to be who you are, what you believe in. Your secondary is your HOW, the way you act and approach life. Below is a little tl;dr of what each of them are (I’m using the animal terminology that’s being used in many blogs, by the way. If you know the houses, you know what each animal is supposed to represent).

Lion primaries are intuitive and guided by their moral compass, which is very strong (doesn’t mean what they believe in is in fact good or correct) and Lion secondaries are the people who charge straight at something, regardless of whether they will come out of it unscathed or not.

Snake primaries value people. Not any person, their people. They will go to hell and earth for their people to be safe and happy, which can get kind of self destructive. Snake secondaries improvise much like Lion secondaries, but they tend to adapt to situation and shapeshift their way out of problems.

Bird primaries also value right and wrong like Lion primaries, but they build their systems with external information and observation, not from their gut feelings. That means Bird primaries change a lot with time, because their ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ change. Bird secondaries collect. Skills, tools, random knowledge, they delve deep and acquire as much of them as they can, not because things are useful, but because it’s fun.

Finally, Badger primaries are also people-persons, but their communities are much broader than a Snake primary’s. They value people, tradition, cultures and so (but not every Badger sees everyone as people, so there’s that). Badger secondaries are the hardworking types in the sense that they cultivate things, they invest in them and even become them.

You can develop models of each house according to what you find useful or what society has instilled in you, but when push come to shove, the models aren’t the real you. All of these houses can burn, meaning their essence is somehow scared away from them due to trauma, depression, societal pressures, etc. That means a Lion stops trusting their instincts, a Snake no longer feels like they’re able to protect their people or their people are better off without them, a Bird loses faith in their systems and a Badger closes themselves off from their communities and adopts a smaller circle of people. Burnt houses can look a lot like each other. For more info, check out the tags. 

Daenerys

Double Lion, no doubt (for most of the show). Dany knows what’s right, she feels it in her bones. She never tries to rationalise her decisions and she won’t usually budge, even if she is presented with a more rational plan. None of her advisors have really convinced her to do anything, they might have pushed her to do what they wanted, but if she had her way, Daenerys would only ever listen to her own heart. She needs people around her to help her not make impulsive, brash decisions(because of her Lion secondary that I will get into), but she definitely doesn’t need - and doesn’t want - a moral compass, hers works just fine. She was burned as hell in the first episodes of the first season, mostly because of Viserys’ horrible influence, because he had robbed her of a purpose, of her truth. Drogo also stifles her primary and secondary for a while, but he eventually gives her some space to be herself. When she unburns, she unburns fast. ‘Not a Queen, a Khaleesi’ is pretty much Day gong ‘yeah, I can do things my way, I can be my own person with my own values and my own self.’ I think from there on, her quest to liberate 1) take back the Iron Throne 2) liberate Slaver’s Bay and ‘Break the Wheel’ just show how much she is focused on a big quest that is not explained by reason, by her need to form a community or by the influence of someone in her life. She does it because that’s the Right Thing ™ to do, and that’s Lion primary in a nutshell. Another thing that points towards Lion primary to me is how she just won’t take criticism and specially betrayal well (not that anyone does, but Dany is particularly unforgiving most of the time). Lion primaries are particularly shaken when someone they admire doesn’t have the same moral standards as they do, because deep down they like to think they know what’s ‘good’ and ‘true’ (oops my Snake primary who doesn’t really get Lions is showing), so if you don’t follow them and their beliefs, you must be doing something wrong. This is why Dany is so fucking pissed at Jorah when she finds out he betrayed her. She is also devastated true, and she misses him, but her ideals and her ‘truth’ stop her from seeing things from his side ad from forgiving him until he has proven himself worthy. Her reaction to betrayals tie in to the fact that she is a MASSIVE Lion secondary. She headbutts her way into things and her liberal use of Dracarys is proof of that. That’s not to say she doesn’t think or plan or listen to her advisors, but when push comes to shove, homegirl ACTS. Fuck the consequences, I have three dragons, fucking try me. Don’t tell me that climbing on Drogon in the fighting pits and burning the Khals were calculated decisions. Burning the Lannister army wasn’t a calculated decision. She leaves the planning to the people around her. This is something I struggle with regarding Lions, but I have to admit they are much more prone to seizing opportunities that us Bird secondaries (because I do have a Snake model but it is utter shit). 

Now, in seasons 7 and 8, she starts burning again. She gets to Westeros, where people aren’t flocking to her side like they did in Essos. Daenerys lets herself be swayed by Jon’s pretty little speeches that sound very Lion, sound very true to Daenerys, but guess what? She is fucking betrayed by everyone. The people she loved are killed, her children are killed (and the whole ‘I will take what is mine’ thing indicates that she might have a Snaky primary model, after all, she does some things because of what she claimed as hers, be it people or the Throne), she is left absolutely alone, so she burns, she loses faith in herself, starts doubting her actions and her instincts and no one is there to help her unburn safely, so the way she does it is destructive, as it often is with Lion primaries who don’t have guidance in order to regain their trust  their instincts and their selves. To me, the KL incidence is her primary going ‘You fucking left me behind, you fuckers, now you are going to see that I was right and fuck the consequences’. Her primary takes a turn for the worse with the help of an impulsive secondary and she ends doing anything to reach her end goal, similar to Albus Dumbledore and his disregard for human life as long as Voldemort being defeated is concerned. 

Jorah

I have no doubts whatsoever that Jorah is a Snake primary. I know the fandom likes to sort him into Hufflepuff when using the traditional sorting system and while there’s no doubts he is a loyalist to the bone, Jorah’s loyalties are much narrower than a Badger primary’s would be. Before he meets Daenerys, he wants to go home and make up with his family, because they are the ones who matter. Not his reputation, not the North, not Bear Islad itself, the Mormont House. Before that still, he does literally anything to keep Lynesse happy, including doing things that are against the law. This utter devotion to certain people are what makes him a Snake primery to me, a paricularly self destructive one. He starts worrying about the fact that he berayed Daenerys when he ‘adopts’ her into his circles and more so when she goes from being in his outermost circles to being the one person his Snake primary is attached to. Daeerys is everything to Jorah. Does he persoally care about freeing slaves or generally following her morals? No, he does it because it is importat to her and he wants her to see he is worthy of her attention (I, another Snek, still don’t kow if I like Florence + The Machine so damn much because I liked a girl who was into FATM or if my Bird secondary saw her taste for FATM and went ‘OMG ME TOO LETS TALK ABOUT THAT’ and the primary just said ‘huh, that’s legit. We’ll worship her from now on’, so yeah, us Snakes do that. On a side note, I never worked up the courage to ask her out, though). That’s why he goes batshit when she banishes him. He doesn’t burn, which means his primary is so strong it wasn’t fazed by being ast out of her circles; no, he is hell bent on getting back into her good graces and if he has to sacrifice his life fr that, so be it. 

Now, when it comes to secondary, I’d say Jorah’s a Lion secondary too, even though he has a lot of models he picked up with time. Models are useful, models get you out of bad situations, but they’re not who you really are. Jorah wans to be a Bird secondary when he’s around Daenerys, he wants to be the careful planner who looks ahead and ensures she is successful and he also needs a Snake secondary model, because his life demands that he twists and turns himself to fit different situations, but deep inside he is a Lion. His most honest moments are the moments when he just does it, no thoughts head empty. Did he have a solid plans when he kidnapped Tyrion? Fuck no! Did he truly know what he was doing when he decided to fight in the pits? Fuck no! Did he think before he charged at the wights and saved Daenerys in Winterfell? Fuck no! His head was probably just going ‘my Daenerys is in danger let’s punch first and see what happens later’. He’s not like Littlefinger, who plans everything ad is so fast at analysing and changing plans he looks like a Snake. His models make him seem like the opposite of Dany, like a Bird to a Lion, brains while she is brawn, but when she is in danger, Jorah charges. 

What the Jorleesi shippers do is take Dany’s Lion primary that is so focused on a quest and show her that she can also include people in her big aspirations. The gut feeling that is so characteristic of Lions is already inside her, all she would need is to put it into words, which isn’t necessarily the strongest suits of many Lions (that’s a Bird thing). Since most of their dynamics inevitably lies on Jorah’s models regulating Dany’s secondary, there’s not much point in ‘taming her Lion’. Jorah stays the same. The fandom looooves his Snake/Lion, specially since us Snakes tend to be too hard on ourselves. A self-loathing Snake who is also a stupid brave Lion secondary? Yes. They are both stupid brave. Also just stupid. Just talk, you two, for fuck’s sake. Get over your Lion, Daenerys, and talk to him, his Snake won’t allow him to bother you too much. 

[underthedekutree]

Young Link might have PTSD - Part 2: Termina is NOT a Parallel World, Technically

This is a continuation of my last post so if you’re seeing this and haven’t read it, go here.

This is the part where I somewhat smoothly segue into Majora’s Mask. Link, lonely and filled with unprocessed trauma, leaves Hyrule in search of Navi. According to most sources (which take from Hyrule Historia probably? don’t quote me on it), Link falls down a hole into Termina, a parallel world to Hyrule, that contains many familiar looking denizens of Hyrule, but playing different roles. And well, if you probably guessed by the title, I have a rather different interpretation.

Okay, so in a nutshell my theory is that Termina is in fact all a dream, kind of like Koholint Island. Except the one dreaming up this world isn’t some deity like the Giants or Skull Kid or the Moon. It’s Link.

(big explainey hoo hah below)

Evidence 1: Link begins the game sleeping. Yes, I know literally every Zelda game begins this way and it’s a whole tradition thing. I am beginning with the weakest points first and working my way up to the strong ones. We’ll get there.

Evidence 2: The reuse of character and environment models from Ocarina of Time. The literal IRL reason for this is of course the game famously being given only one year of production time, which meant that the most practical method was to reuse as much material from MM’s predecessor as possible (eg. Romani Ranch sign is the Kakariko Village sign, and still says Kakariko Village on it). It seems like a rather offhand afterthought for Nintendo to chalk it all up to “oh its just a parallel world like Link to the Past or something. But think of it like this; when we dream, we often see familiar people from throughout our lives put in strange and unexpected situations, like that irritable old farmhand you hated so much is now a depressed circus master for some reason. Dreams don’t make sense. Things you know will mix with other strange inexplicable things, fleeting thoughts in your mind, all roughly tied together by whatever emotions you had been feeling when you went to bed. Malon is split into two people, Romani and Cremia, her older and younger self. This might reflect how Link feels about Malon, that she changed so much in those 7 years that she’s like a different person entirely, that it’s hard for him to process that they are the same, because the change was so shockingly sudden for him.

Evidence 3: Gorons in the snow, Gerudo by the sea. Yes, I know that sounds a lot like good evidence for a parallel world (that’s why the idea is widely accepted in the first place, it has merit), but it also works in as dream world evidence too. As a child, my family was obsessed with skiing. We would go to the same mountain every winter, and we would stay at the same lodge. It almost became like a second home for me. So much so, that one night I dreamed that my house had been replaced by the lodge, so it wasn’t on a snow-capped mountain, but in a bushy Australian suburb. Okay that kinda got off subject but I’m bad at conclusions so in summary Dreams Just Be Like That (tm). You get what I’m saying right? No? Sorry, let’s just move on.

Evidence 4: The Milk Bar. AKA my favourite location in the game! It’s often overlooked as the “haha funny they couldn’t put alcohol in kids game so its kiddy milk hee hee”, but it is actually a strong thematic pillar of Majora’s Mask. As I mentioned in Part 1, if you put a 9 year old in a 16 year old’s body and call him an adult before ripping that all away is probably going to leave the kid with an identity crisis. What is a mature place open at late hours when children are sleeping? A bar. What is a drink associated with the young, being produced for the purpose of helping children grow? Milk. No please don’t go I swear there’s more to this, stay with me. In order to gain access to the bar, Link must prove he is mature enough by wearing a mask, a disguise, like Adult Link is to Young Link. Being adult isn’t earned through years of natural living experience and mental development, it’s a thing you are given by adults to just BE when they deem you worthy, at least from how Link sees it. So that is the amalgamation of dream thoughts that is the Milk Bar. Is it mature? Is it childish? What is the line between the two? Is there one? It’s the culmination of his anxieties and confusions that he doesn’t know how to express. Another, smaller expression of this anxiety is the Clock Town Guards. When Link is a Deku, the guards say they don’t allow children outside the gates. When Link turns back however, the guard goes to stop him because he looks too young, but sees that he has a sword, and lets him pass. Why the sword? Well, in one way this is a callback to Kokiri Forest, where Mido doesn’t let Link see the Deku Tree until he has a sword. But also, what is the item that lets Link travel through time and become an adult in OOT? The Master Sword. Link seems to believe that adulthood is measured by the things you have, physical markers of maturity, which is how lots of children see adulthood. You’re an adult if you can drink, if you’re tall, if you’re married, if you have a house, a car etc. But in reality this isn’t how it works. Heck, I’m technically an adult but I sure as hell don’t feel like one, because I know I still have things to learn about responsibility, patience and all the other things, that can only come with time, which is the moral conclusion of OOT, but clearly Link missed the memo. Don’t get me wrong, there are some indicators to show he’s grown a bit. He can ride Epona, use the bow, do flips like some kind of acrobat etc. But those strange and confused feelings linger, and manifest in the young boy’s dreams.

Evidence 5: The four transformation masks. The four masks represent different aspects of Link’s self, and the way he grew and changed in OOT. Deku Scrub the Innocent, Goron the Confident, Zora the Mature and Fierce Deity the Hero. Link began only knowing the Kokiri Forest, and nothing of the world outside. As he set out on his journey, he grew more confident in his skills and defeated greater foes. When evil took over, he learned from his fatal mistake and worked to right it. And when it was finally time to face the greatest threat, he was ready, with all the heart pieces, bottles full of fairies, Biggoron Sword in hand. At that moment he struck the final blow he probably felt like the strong and unstoppable hero everyone in Hyrule told him he needed to be. And that feeling of pure uncompromising strength, with the whole world behind him, manifested in the Fierce Deity. Fierce Deity is much taller than Adult Link, and packs so much of a punch that he can beat Majora without batting an eye, like some overpowered Super Saiyan. It reminds me a lot of Undertale, with young Asriel becoming what he imagines to be an all-powerful godlike being, like something you’d see as a children’s drawing. Fierce Deity gives off those vibes, like “he has a HUGE SWORD that SHOOTS BEAMS OF LIGHT and he’s 8 FOOT TALL and CAN KILL ENEMIES IN A SINGLE BLOW!!” Before the final battle on the moon, when Majora gives you the mask, he childishly asks if you want to play a game of good guys and bad guys. And the good guy always wins, no matter what. Fierce Deity makes the final boss a cakewalk, but its supposed to.

Evidence 6: Anju and Kafei. Short one, because it falls a lot into everything else I’ve said regarding childhood vs adulthood. Kafei is effectively a switcheroo of what happened to Link in OOT. An adult shrunk back to childhood, uncomfortable in his new body and looking for a way to fix everything. He’s a reflection of how Link now kinda feels like an adult in a child’s body, because he had started to be used to being called an adult.

Evidence 7: The Moon. I haven’t super touched on the main meat of the game yet, so here it is. The moon and the 3 day mechanic is an allegory for constant mounting pressure, that builds and builds, never ceasing, because the world is in danger, and there’s only one person who has been chosen to save it. I’ve always been interested in the Chosen One narrative, and how different media explore the idea of the world’s very existence being pushed onto one person. How at the end of it all, they can never be the same again after all they’ve gone through. When you’re somehow expected to hold up the Moon itself single-handed, and your life and everything you care about suffers because you’re putting everyone else before yourself. That feeling of complete loneliness under a crushing weight, and although other characters may come to help you, in the end its still all down to you, and you never had a choice in any of it, as all the decisions were made by someone else. You must do what they tell you. Believe in yourself, believe...

Evidence 8: Skull Kid. The story goes that long ago in Termina, the Skull Kid and the Giants played together, until one day, the Giants left, leaving the Skull Kid alone and heartbroken, with nobody to turn to. As life moves on, things may change, and people always come and go from your life. Your friend might move overseas, or stop texting you, or you might fall out of friendship after an awkward event from which you could never recover (no, these have totally not all happened to me, shut up i’m fine), or your fairy companion might just disappear without so much as a goodbye after their task is complete. And it feels like you didn’t matter at all. That they never really cared about you, and you’re as easy to drop and move on from as a child’s toy. You might get angry, and want to shut them out, and give them a taste of their own medicine. Majora’s Mask teaches you that this isn’t the case. Life is ever changing, but you will always have the memories of times with your friends, and a chance to make more with new friends, like a sassy talkative fairy sprite and her shy brother or a child made of wood who wants to destroy the world. Friends come from unlikely places, so accept that change will happen and hope that wherever the people you knew are, they’re okay. You’re thinking about them, so they might be thinking about you too. And who knows? Life is unpredictable. They might just come back one day, and it’ll be like they were never gone.

Evidence 9 (the final one, I promise): The Song of Healing. At the end of all things, after losing ones you love, connections to family and friends, memories of things long past... you need time to heal. Link’s journey through Termina is a constant gauntlet of running into his own past traumas, forced to relive them again, and again, and again. But sometimes you should take a deep breath, gather your thoughts, and take time to heal. Although it can be important to confront your fears and learn to surpass them, it is exhausting, and you can end up more emotionally broken than when you started. The three masks all had regrets of powerlessness; unable to protect your community, your loved ones, or even yourself. Troubles you’ve gone through that keep plaguing your mind, and you’re wondering if you’ve done enough, seeking answers where none can be found. And the best thing you can do... is accept and move on. Be kind to yourself, and give yourself time to heal. Link’s way of processing his grief and trauma is to create an entire hellscape world in his own head, but not everyone processes it the same way. Sometimes you feel like you need to busy yourself, or listen to soothing music, or talk to people you trust, or spend copious amounts of money, or make some angst art, or cuddle your plush toys until their stuffing squeezes out. Sometimes life hits you in the face and you want to blame yourself for standing in the firing line, but it’s not your fault. It’s okay to feel however you feel, whether you’re drenched in a pool of tears or you just feel numb, it’s okay and natural. You’re okay. You’re here.

Okay so it got kinda personal at the end there but I hope it was informative, and made you think a little bit differently about Majora’s Mask and Ocarina of Time. You probably want to go back and play them now. Me too.

So was this all just an excuse for me to gush about how cool Majora’s Mask is? Hell fucking yes it was. Congratulations for making it through my monstrous ramblings, you get the secret prize of looking at my weird art on my DA. Here you go. Have a nice day, Zelda Nerds.

[grrlinthefireplace]

Hey so I’ve been seeing you post a lot about La Casa de Papel recently. What exactly is it? It looks kinda interesting.

Thank you so much for asking!

I am delighted beyond reason to have the opportunity to tell you - and by extension the entire world - why this show has cleared my skin, watered my crops, and legitimately healed my soul after this particularly soul-crushing season of Grimdark White Man Television almost broke me as a human being.

I will attempt to keep this as spoiler-free as I possibly can, because this is a show that should be experienced in the moment, but in a nutshell, La Casa de Papel is a heist show set in present-day Madrid which follows both a found family of thieves who rob the Royal Mint of Spain, and the law enforcement officials on the outside who are chasing them.

If that is enough for you, go right to your TV or computer, fire up the ol’ Netflix, and don’t waste any more time.

If, however, you need a little more, here are the top five things I flail about to every single person in my life to convince them they need to start watching this show like immediately and then come back and tell me all about it.

For visual flair, we’ll intersperse them with some gifs of ladies, because I know my audience.

5. character driving plot > plot driving character.

You know that infuriating thing lazy TV writers do where, in order to to hurry up and get to the big explosion or battle scene or dragon attack or whatever, which is the only bit they really care about, they handwave away the whole concept of motivation and make some character do something that any halfway-attentive viewer will immediately clock that they would never actually do?

There is none of that bullshit here.

In its simplest form, the plot of La Casa de Papel is as follows: a brilliant criminal mastermind devises a heist which cannot possibly go wrong, and then we proceed to watch all the ways in which it goes wrong.

This is a fantastic setup for an action story, made even more breathlessly exciting by strategic use of my favorite heist movie plot device (as perfected by Ocean’s Eleven): namely, “scene where it looks like our crime heroes have been outsmarted and are now threatened by a completely unforeseen disaster” immediately followed by “flashback to the team prepping for the heist where we learn that of course they prepared for this exact scenario.”

But from time to time, things do actually go wrong (as they must, or else there would be no story); and, when they do, it is never because you can tell a writer just wanted to write a scene where bullets go flying, and didn’t care how he got there. These characters are so clear, their behavior so consistent, that when gasp-worthy plot twists happen, they happen because of course that character, in this exact scenario, would do that exact thing.

I’m telling you, I came to this show for a ship (more on that in a minute) and I stayed for a swooning, heart-eyes writer crush on the impeccably-designed plot structure and characterization.

4. High stakes, low gore.

Tone-wise, on a sliding scale of Heist Film Intensity where a really fluffy episode of Leverage is a 1, Reservoir Dogs is a 10, and the Ocean’s franchise is somewhere in the 3-4 range, I would place La Casa at a 5 or a 6, which is perfect for me. I love action, suspense, drama and adventure, but I hate gratuitous violence (especially when it’s pointless and masturbatory and doesn’t contribute anything to the plot) and have a very low tolerance for blood and gore. So I kept waiting for the story to eventually take a hard left turn into Tarantino Land, until eventually it was all just one huge pile of dead bodies, and was genuinely surprised when it didn’t.

This is how I learned just how badly my brain has been fucked up by lazy showrunners who think shock deaths are the only way to raise stakes. During the first season of this show, before I had figured out that it was a Flawless Gem of Television Which So Far Has Not Once Disappointed Me, there were probably a dozen moments where I was absolutely convinced that some character was about to be gruesomely killed for shock value … and I was wrong every single time.

Reader, it was fucking wild.

Every single time I was convinced that person A was going to shoot person B in the head because blah blah maximum angst over here in this part of the story and then it will motivate person C to do this other thing, the show did the hard work of finding a smarter, more unexpected direction to take that character’s story. That means that when deaths do come along - and there are a couple - they feel genuinely earned, and they matter deeply to the story and to us.

3. I would die for these women.

This show loves women. Like it truly, authentically, uncompromisingly loves women in all our fucked-up messy glorious complexity. There are no “types” or cliches here; no one is forced to be only one thing. Fuck your one-dimensional Strong Female Characters, lazy writers.

For one thing, on many shows you might be lucky if you get maybe one mom who is given a personality and a story outside of motherhood. Often, on shows written by men, the fact of her motherhood diminishes her strength or her agency. On this show, nearly every one of the central female characters is both a mom and an action hero simultaneously. Seriously. By season 3 there are four different battle moms. They’re all different, they’re not all on the same side, they have different perspectives, and their role as mother impacts the story differently, but that’s the joy of having a whole lot of different kinds of women - no one has to be everything to everyone.

These women are complicated. They laugh, they cry, they crack dirty jokes, they get laid, they have babies, they fight, they make mistakes, they fall in love, they grow. Men pull sexist shit and they shut it the fuck down. Some of them have love stories, some of them don’t, but they are never defined by or triangulated around relationships with men. They get to have relationships with each other. All of them are excellent at their jobs.

Tokyo is the kind of hot mess antihero protagonist we’ve been watching middle-aged white men play for decades.

Allison is such a realistic teenage girl it’s genuinely painful to watch.

Monica has one of the best arcs I’ve ever seen on television, this is not a drill.

Alicia is terrifying. (A pregnant black ops interrogator! ON WHAT OTHER FUCKING SHOW!?!??)

Nairobi is unlike any other character you’ve seen on TV before; she’s got a little bit of Parker from Leverage, a little bit of Raven Reyes from The 100, but she’s entirely her own creature and you will fall in love with her instantly.

And Raquel. Oh, my love, my angel, my hero, Inspector Raquel Murillo. Love of my goddamn life. A fierce, kickass hostage negotiator swimming upstream against a tide of workplace misogyny who sometimes has to make the frustrating little male-appeasing compromises we all have to make to get through the workday. A beautiful, sexy, powerful heroine over 40 whose femininity isn’t diminished based on some bullshit notion that, for example, pairing your tough-bitch suit and gun holster with red toenails and a lacy blouse detracts from your strength. A loving mom and daughter who has to juggle raising a small child and caring for an aging parent with the stress of, you know, trying to stop the biggest robbery in the history of Spain. A domestic violence survivor (TW for those who need it; nothing is ever shown onscreen, but it’s discussed several times) who is given the space to discuss the things that have happened to her and how she has worked through them with such dignity, accuracy and respect that you can tell the writers did their homework.

This is a show where you can tell there are women in the writers’ room.

2. The Professor and Raquel. I don’t want to spoil a single thing for you here except to say that I myself was lured into this show by the promise of electric sexual chemistry between a criminal mastermind and the police inspector hunting him down, and my God I was not disappointed.

1. Love.

This show came into my life at a period where I was so weary of cynicism on television - so fucking furious at showrunners who dangle hope in front of us and then crush it, who only care about building anything if they can tear it down later, who treat love and fun and joy and hope and family and happiness like they’re intellectually lesser than grimdark nihilism with no soul - that I was honestly kind of broken by it. I was just so. fucking. tired. Tired of “the way we show this heroine is strong is to kill off her love interest.” Tired of “sorry but all this rape and murder is NECESSARY because of REALISM” (particularly rich when coming from shows featuring evil A.I.’s or dragons and ice zombies). Tired of getting invested in relationships - whether ships or friends or found families - only to realize that the show I was watching was always going to sacrifice character to force plot mechanics into place, and those relationships were never going to get the kind of care and focus I wanted them to get.

But that is not this show.

The single most revolutionary thing, to me, about La Casa de Papel - the thing that sets it apart from every other rollercoaster action thrill ride on television - is that every single thread of the plot is tied to love.

Every.

Single.

One.

Love of all different shapes and sizes - parents and children, friendships, doomed crushes (straight and queer), toxic exes, blossoming romances, siblings - and over it all, a deep, deep love for humanity.

The thing I said before, about how when things go wrong they go wrong in character-driven ways? It’s this. Love is why everything on this show happens. Love is what makes children want to live up to their parents and what makes parents fight to leave a better world for their children. Love is why deaths have stakes. Love is why we spend so much screentime lingering on small moments another show might ignore, like all the thieves at heist camp sitting down every night to have dinner together and argue about paella techniques. Love is what causes chaos in the middle of the heist; when there’s one person in the room you care about more than the others, you can get distracted and take your eye off the ball. Love is how your enemies can get to you, by leveraging or blackmailing the people who matter most, knowing that you’ll crack if they’re in danger. Love, gone wrong, causes toxic men to develop possessive and controlling behavior towards women. Love is how the Professor gets the idea for the heist in the first place. The plan is flawless on paper, but it doesn’t account for the human variable, and over and over again we see that relationships and connection and sex and family and love cause people to behave in unpredictable ways and throw the whole plan into chaos, which is what makes for a dynamic and compelling story.

How refreshing to see a show simply refuse to grant the oft-repeated premise that a show cannot have both high-octane thrills, and a big soft squishy heart, at the same time.

ANYWAY, I’VE TAKEN UP ENOUGH OF YOUR VALUABLE TV-WATCHING TIME, GO JUMP ON BOARD THIS TRAIN AND COME SCREAM ABOUT IDEALISTIC SPANISH ROBIN HOODS WITH ME, AND LET THE GOOD SHIP SERQUEL INTO YOUR LIFE, YOU WON’T BE SORRY

THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK

[missmentelle]

This might sound very silly but I just don't know how to be more proactive. I've been very passive all this years until this point where I feel like I can't anymore. I wish I could be more hardworking for the things I want but I get all overwhelmed and don't even know how other people have the energy or the motivation. People think Im just lazy. I don't have almost any skills let alone any that I can monetize, I feel like Im going to be a looser forever.

I think this is a problem that a lot of people - especially younger people - are struggling with right now. We want to achieve great things, and we feel like we should be achieving great things, but many of us are so paralyzed by doubt/anxiety/apathy/uncertainty that we have a hard time mustering up the motivation to run basic errands, let alone chase our dreams. I’ve certainly spent more than my fair share of time beating myself up for the countless days that I’ve fucked around on Reddit all day instead of actually achieving anything, even when I was fully aware that I was sabotaging my own dreams and goals by doing so. I just couldn’t always muster up the ability to care about the things I needed to be doing, even if there were dire consequences for not doing them. The good news is, there are definitely ways to overcome this issue, and reach a point where you are happier with your progress and your life. To get started, I recommend:

Decide what it is you actually want. Telling yourself to “be more proactive”, “work harder” or “have a better life” is not helpful if you don’t actually have specific goals that you’re working towards. It is very, very easy to find ways to be “busy” for 8 hours per day - but being busy doesn’t necessarily mean progress. Take some time, and think about some rough goals that you’d like to actually work towards. Don’t worry about how much work or effort it would be to achieve those goals, just start thinking about what you want in life, and what’s the most important to you. Think about the kind of life that you would like to have someday, and start figuring out the steps you need to take in order to get yourself from your current life to the life that you envision. It’s okay if those things are very far apart - the point is not for you to get overwhelmed, but for you to have something to be proactive about. 

Start slowly. You cannot go from “spending 8 hours per day mindlessly browsing the internet amidst a pile of old take-out containers” to “running 5 miles every morning before making art for 8 hours in a spotless apartment with a fridge full of vegetables” overnight. Trying to change your routine too drastically and too quickly will lead to you burning out in a couple of days and going right back to your old ways, with an added dose of self-hatred because you tried and failed. Trying to be more productive and more functional is a process, and a long one at that. It’s not at all unusual or abnormal to take several years of work before you get your life to where you want it to be. Start slow. Start with incredibly tiny changes, and slowly build up those changes over time. If you currently live on a diet of fast food and candy, and you want to be a shredded, clean-eating fitness guru, you can’t rush into that all at once. Start by swapping out full-sugar pop for diet pop for the first month, and trying to drink more water. That’s it. Don’t make any other changes. Then the second month, switch out diet pop for flavored water. And so on. Change only sticks when it’s gradual. 

Focus on one thing at a time. Again, trying to do too much, too soon is a recipe for fast burnout and self-hatred. Start by trying to change one area of your life, and one area of your life alone. Once you feel like you have a pretty solid handle on that part of your life and you have established some new habits, then you can add on a second area of focus. Spend some time, and really think about which area of your life is the most important for you to change, and which area of focus will improve your life the most. If it helps, envision your problems as rocks that you are carrying around in a backpack with you at all times. What’s the heaviest rock in your backpack? If you are overweight, unhappily single, making no progress building your YouTube channel and failing out of college, then your college grades are probably the thing causing you the most stress in your life, and they’re your most urgent concern - focus on that, and give yourself permission to let the rest of it sit on the back burner until you have boosted your GPA. Only then will you be ready to start changing something else. 

Go easy on yourself. I think one of the pitfalls that many young people face these days is that they absolutely crush themselves with unrealistic expectations of what they “should” be doing with their lives; it’s hard to get up the motivation to do anything when you’ve convinced yourself that the bare minimum for success is an impossible ideal. I have friends with master’s degrees who still consider themselves failures that haven’t done anything in life. Remember that you are not a machine. Even at your most successful and high-functional, you will not be perfect and productive 100% of the time. You will still have lazy days where you don’t get much done. You will still occasionally order takeout instead of making a home-cooked meal. You will still occasionally procrastinate. Don’t set yourself up for failure by comparing yourself to an unattainable ideal - just aim to be a slightly better version of what you are right now. 

Get used to tracking, even without making changes. It’s hard to set goals for improvement if you don’t have a solid idea of what you’re actually doing right now. Telling yourself things like “stop being so lazy and do more things” is setting yourself up for a spiral of self-loathing if you don’t actually track what you’re doing, because you won’t be able to see the small, gradual progress that you’re making. Being able to actually see yourself taking baby steps toward your goal is important for keeping you motivated, and keeping you from beating yourself up. Don’t track absolutely everything in your life - that becomes obsessive after a while - but keep an eye on some of the major things that you might want to change in the future. Install apps on your phone and laptop that track how much time you spend doing what. Set up the step tracker on your phone. If you want to eat better in the future, start tracking roughly what you eat now. I’m a pretty avid bullet journaler, I track a lot of my daily habits. Keeping track of the things you do, even if you’re not proud of them, and even before you start to work on them, gives you a baseline to work with, so you can establish how bad the problem is and see when you’re heading in the right direction. 

Forget the obsession with monetizing. A lot of us have gotten this idea in our heads that we need to find ways to monetize everything that we’re even remotely good at, or doing that thing is somehow a waste of our time. I don’t want to generalize about millennials and gen z too much, but I do feel like our generation was raised on the belief that “doing what you love” is the most important thing in life; I personally have many friends that are obsessed with monetizing, to the point that they no longer do anything unless they can find some way to funnel it into advancing their blogger/influencer/creator career. I think this is a mistake. When you monetize something that you love doing, you turn it from a hobby into a job, with all the stress that comes with that, and I think it’s important for everyone to have at least one thing in their life that they do just for the joy of it. It’s okay to let work be work, and play just be play. And I say this as a person who has monetized one of my hobbies; I love true crime and forensic psychology, and I co-host a true crime podcast that has recently had a huge surge of popularity and is on the cusp of being monetized. I could write an entire post about the mental health side of being a creator with a public online presence, but in a nutshell, turning my podcast from a hobby into a business has required me to take it a lot more seriously, and it now falls more into the category of “work” than it does “fun”. My enjoyment of life requires that some of my other hobbies - like playing music - just stay un-monetized hobbies. Let yourself create and do things that don’t have economic value. 

Don’t compare yourself to what you see on social media. I have had both personal friends and followers on this blog tell me that they feel bad about themselves because their life doesn’t measure up to what they see on Instagram, or because they feel that their own lives would not be worthy of posting online. This is a toxic mindset to get into. The things you see on social media are not reality, no matter how much they appear to be - people put incredible amounts of effort into carefully cultivating an online persona that makes them look more productive and accomplished than they actually are. I have a brother who who is a somewhat successful Instagram “influencer”, alongside his more successful girlfriend, and I could write an entire post about the lengths they go to to fake having perfect lives on Instagram, and the toll that their Insta careers are having on their mental health. If you are looking to be a more productive version of yourself, it’s best to steer clear of “motivation” from people who are paid to pretend to be successful online. 

Set measurable, achievable goals. Goals like “be healthier” and “do more stuff” won’t get you anywhere - they are so vague that it’s not possible to tell when you’ve actually achieved them, or how much progress you’ve made. If you want to be more productive and feel like you’re getting more done, you need to set goals that can actually be worked towards and checked off when they are done. Instead of “go to the gym more”, aim for “go to the gym 5 days per week” as your end goal, and start with a solid couple of months with “go to the gym at least once per week”, and slowly increase from there. If you’re aiming for something big like “have an awesome job”, break that down into medium-sized goals like “finish an undergrad degree”, and then break that goal down even further into “hand in all my assignments on time this semester”, and break that down further into “write the first 10 pages of my paper by the end of the week”. Set tiny goals for yourself that you can easily achieve, and that will gradually accumulate into big accomplishments. 

Remember that slow progress is better than no progress. If you write one sentence per day, it is going to take you a really long time to write a novel. It will take you a whole lot less time, however, than if you get overwhelmed at the thought of writing a novel and never write at all. Sometimes you need to break goals down into steps so small that they also seem not worth doing. It can feel a little silly to congratulate yourself for things like “brushed my teeth today” and “texted someone back today”, but those are little habits that add up into bigger things, and giving yourself that positive reinforcement is important. “Greatness” and “success” are not things you achieve all at once, they are made up of tiny habits that you’ve been working on for months or years at a time. 

Take care of your mental health. Not feeling the motivation to do anything, even things that you enjoy, can be a symptom of depression. Everyone beats themselves up from time to time for not being more productive, but if your brain is constantly on a feedback loop of “I’m human garbage and I’m wasting my life”, that’s a pretty serious problem, and a solid sign that it’s time to seek out some professional help. Trying to make major life improvements without addressing underlying mental health concerns is kind of like trying to drive a car without wheels - you’re just not going to get anywhere until you’ve dealt with the obvious problem. 

Remember that setbacks are okay. Even the most highly proactive and high-functioning people have days where they say “fuck it” and order takeout to eat in front of the TV. Everyone occasionally misses deadlines or leaves things to the last minute when they shouldn’t. Everyone shows up late occasionally. These things happen - we are humans, and none of us are perfect. The key to long-term proactivity and productivity, though, is not to let those small setbacks define you, and not to throw away all the progress you’ve made over a bad day or a bad week. Eating healthy six days per week will put you in a much better position than deciding “fuck it, I blew it” after one bad meal and returning to eating unhealthy meals 7 days per week. As the saying goes, don’t let perfect be the enemy of good - in other words, perfection is not attainable, and getting hung up on being perfect will prevent you from achieving many things that are good. The idea is not to be perfect; it’s just to keep striving to be a slightly better version of yourself. 

Best of luck to you!

[presidentrhodes]

Spider-Man Far From Home spoilers

I just finished watching it and, honestly, I’d say it was a pretty good way to bid farewell to the first three phases of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. 

Spoilers under the cut. This is pretty long and rambly. 

1. Midtown high is supposed to be a school for geniuses but these little shits use comic sans in tribute videos and steal watermarked Getty Images pictures to put in them. I loved it, particularly with the song choice and the fact that Vision’s picture was from the Civil War airport standoff in Leipzig — that means only Peter could’ve provided it and no one bothered to ask how he got it. 

2. Tom Holland really wasn’t kidding when he said the film was a love letter to RDJ/Tony Stark. He was everywhere, his sacrifice was being recognised around the world: they even had a documentary on him, which was available in the in-flight entertainment, plus, there were murals and photographs in Venice and Prague. He was very much present throughout the film. 

3. EDITH. In a nutshell, it’s an augmented reality-enabled AI that controls a tactical and defensive system Tony built to protect Earth in the aftermath of his demise. Think Ultron’s perfect self minus the winning personality — EDITH controls a bunch of massive Stark Industries satellites in orbit that are equipped with thousands of weaponised drones. It can remotely target individual threats and take them out with simple voice commands. It also is able to connect to any network in the vicinity, so, Peter was able to see what his classmates were doing on their devices. 

I’ve already seen so many angry posts comparing EDITH to Project Insight without taking into account a) intent; and b) the reality of the MCU. Tony didn’t build EDITH for the same reason Zola built Project Insight. The former was meant to be a last or first line of defence, controlled by an Avenger Tony personally trusted. The latter was a means to subjugate the world population to Hydra’s will. 

All tech in the MCU is dangerous when it falls into the wrong hands — that’s why they’re called the wrong hands and why Steve once said the safest hands are their own. The supersoldier serum gave us Steve Rogers; it also gave us the Winter Soldiers, a bunch of dangerous, invincible highly-trained assassins. Pym particles gave us Ant-Man and the Wasp as well as time travel; it also gave us Yellowjacket, who immediately wanted to weaponise the tech. The Iron Man suit gave us Iron Man; but also gave us Iron Monger, who wanted to build an army of metal soldiers. Wakanda’s highly-advanced weapon systems were able to withstand a full-scale invasion from the Outriders, but those same weapons almost started a global war in Killmonger’s hands. Project Insight and Ultron showed us the bad side of AI; JARVIS, Vision, FRIDAY, Karen and EDITH, to an extent, showed us the good side of AI.

The point is, technology in the wrong hands will always be a bad thing yet people only seem to gripe about Stark tech while ignoring every other piece of advanced technology we’ve seen weaponized or misused. I wonder why. Since the MCU canonically isn’t made up of one big Luddite colony, there’ll always be new technology being developed and bad guys finding ways to abuse them. 

Just look at the holographic tech Mysterio designed while at Stark Industries. Even before he was fired, his ambitions were grander and afterwards, he weaponized it and willingly sent people to their dooms so that he could play a hero. When 16-year-old Peter Parker, MJ and Ned — literal children — found out the truth and Mysterio risked being exposed as a fraud, he actively tried to kill them. Mysterio beat the shit out of Peter and threw him in front of an incoming high-speed train, so, no, I don’t care if Tony Stark was mean to him by firing him, he was a piece of shit who tried repeatedly to kill a kid. 

Tony, meanwhile, spent $600+ million on the holographic tech to design B.A.R.F — a technology with some really promising applications in the MedTech sector to help people overcome their PTSD and trauma. That’s the fucking difference between a superhero and a supervillain.

Sure, EDITH also has massive privacy concerns. That’s on Tony, but after the Decimation, I think people have bigger problems to worry about than whether Peter Parker is snooping on their text messages. Ultimately, EDITH offers Peter, and whoever else is going to fill up the Avengers roster in the future, a plan B to strike the bad guys from a safe distance. I

4. Tony left Peter in charge of EDITH. Not the Avengers, not SHIELD, and definitely not the US Department of Defense — a fact that actually pissed off Mysterio. Tony left it in Peter’s hands because he knew Spider-Man took the meaning of responsibility far more seriously than he ever did. All those years ago, Peter told him if one could do the things he could, and they didn’t, and then the bad things happened, they happened because of them. And, honestly, if anyone deserves to have control over such a potentially dangerous piece of tech that can help in future battles, then it’s Peter — even more so than Tony. 

5. Again, Peter is 16 in this film and still coping with loss and trauma. He willingly gave controls of EDITH to Quentin because Mysterio had everyone fooled, including Nick Fury/Talos — they’re both highly experienced soldiers. Fooling them wouldn’t have been easy and Mysterio’s plan was extremely well thought-out and perfectly executed. Peter redeem himself in the end and takes back control of EDITH. 

6. Peter and MJ were super adorable. Spider-Man is the only franchise apart from Iron Man, where the secondary lead characters are allowed to grow without it all being about the main hero. MJ is allowed to explore her feelings for Peter and measure them against Brad’s affection. Ned is allowed to also grow in his character and be more than Spider-Man’s best friend/guy in a chair. 

7. Happy and May were also adorable.

8. Happy ruined a perfectly good bed of tulips just to rescue May’s nephew and give him the TLC/pep talk he needed after, again, Beck pushed Peter in front of a high-speed train that would’ve killed an ordinary person. 

9. Peter confusing ACDC with Led Zeppelin is the most Gen Z thing ever. Happy watched Peter design his own suit and it reminded him of the times he spent watching Tony tinker in his lab. You could feel Tony’s absence pretty viscerally in that scene on the jet. 

10. Peter tingle. Lol. 

11. Happy’s words about Tony were beautiful. He said something along the lines of, “Tony was my best friend. He second-guessed everything he did. He was a mess. But the one thing he didn’t second-guess was picking you.” That really furthered the Iron Dad Spider Son narrative.

12. Iron Zombie was the w o r s t thing ever. Again, Beck emotionally manipulated 16-year-old Peter Parker and said if Peter was any good, his mentor would still be alive just as he projected an illusion of a decaying Iron Man corpse attacking him. To give you a sense of how manipulative he really is, he told his guy in the chair that Peter’s blood will be on his hands because he had failed to report a missing drone part that MJ had discovered in Prague. 

13. Peter finally understanding that he doesn’t have to be the next Tony Stark or Iron Man. He just needs to be the next Spider-Man and Peter Parker. 

14. Peter choosing to safeguard EDITH. 

15. J. Jonah Jameson and J.K. Simmons. That is all. He’s the MCU equivalent of Alex Jones and I love him so much. I wonder if this means we’ll see Doctor Strange offer Peter his help to erase everyone’s memories about the reveal of his secret identity. 

16. Every Nick Fury scene automatically becomes 2000x funnier when you realize it’s Talos posing as Fury and 90% of the time, he has no idea what the fuck is going on and he’s just winging it as he goes along. Also, he was furious that he and his wife, as members of a shapeshifting species, were unable to detect Mysterio’s ruse. 

17. Mysterio was a douchebag. Apart from trying to kill actual kids because he feared they might expose him, he did nothing worthy of a hero. He was jealous and angry about Tony, and he wanted to usurp Iron Man without doing any of the hard work. He willingly put people in danger, was prepared to sacrifice people to make his actions seem more realistic and wanted to take credit for saving the day and preventing an Avengers-level catastrophe. I’ve already seen reviewers trying to sympathise with Mysterio, and his persistent attempts to kill a 16-year-old kid because Tony was apparently mean to him. 

18. And, no, Tony did not steal B.A.R.F tech from Mysterio as some review sites are claiming. The narrative is unreliable at best because we hear only Quentin’s point of view — the same Quentin who had been using his holographic tech to deceive people and put them in harm’s way because he wanted to shake the Queen’s hands or some misguided bullshit. He deserved to fired. Plus, he was a Stark Industries employee. Tech companies almost always own the patent to whatever tech you design or invent for them when you’re on their payroll. It’s how corporations work.

19. Tony quoted Henry IV to Fury when he told him to give EDITH to Peter and said Spidey wouldn’t get the reference (Heavy is the head that wears the crown) because it’s not Star Wars. It was a nice, poignant moment — made funnier when you realize that’s Talos in disguise, which means at some point, Fury had to have a conversation with him about Shakespeare and Star Wars. Someone pls write the fic. 

20. The most important thing is that this film actually tried to address the Decimation. Endgame pretended to gloss over it to give Gay Joe Russo his 15 minutes of fame. But this film actually started with May and Peter organizing an event to help the displaced. Pepper sent a huge check and apologized for not being able to make it in person. :( 

20a. I love Jake Gyllenhaal. I had expected Quentin to be a dramatic thot but he really brought a lot of depth to the character. 

Overall, I liked the film a lot more than I had anticipated. Some people are going to scrutinize this film to death to prove Tony was the ultimate MCU villain and, hey, if that’s the hill they choose to die on, I don’t really care. After 11 years and 23 films later, if they still think that Tony was the real villain all along, then nothing we say or Marvel does, will change their mind. 

Personally, I thought this film was a good send off to Tony, now that they’ve firmly established that Peter Parker/Spider-Man is going to be the new face of the MCU and will carry with him the Iron Man legacy. He wasn’t always right and a lot of his choices tended to backfire but, in the end, his motivations were good and he still went out as the man who saved the world. He, unlike Beck, or Vulture before him, never tried to kill a child, not even when he brought him to a parking lot brawl among friends. 

Now, if only Marvel can just leave Tony’s legacy alone and let Peter, and the rest of the MCU, thrive on its own instead of retconning established Iron Man lore to fit new narratives. 

[bigskydreaming]

How would you go about a good Spyral Dick Grayson storyline? I like the idea but not the execution (if it was stated he was acting like an idiot I'd like it better). Also in the same vein how would you do DickTiger/how do you think it'd work?

I’m side-eyeing you a little anon, lol, because I’m not sure what you mean by it’d be better if it was stated he was acting like an idiot. Because see, as far as I’m concerned, nothing about Dick’s actions was out of character....so long as you center Bruce’s actions as the real driving force behind Dick ending up stuck undercover at Spyral. Dick’s actions make perfect sense....as the fractured attempts at recuperating from a massive trauma without any semblance of a support system or any time or space to actually dedicate to acknowledging and accepting what he’d just been through before leaping right back into danger.

It remains extremely troubling to me that even WITHOUT taking into account Bruce’s victim blaming him for his own death, emotional manipulation and physical beating...all of that only stacks on top of what should already have been the takeaway, IMO:

And that is that its absolutely ridiculous to think that Dick could have remotely been emotionally and mentally composed enough to make an informed, non-coerced decision about undertaking the Spyral mission AND keeping it from the rest of the family.....mere days after being extensively tortured and then briefly died.

He wasn’t in a sound state of mind to make that decision with full awareness of all the implications and repercussions like he would have at other times. Nobody would have been.

And the rest of his family might not have known about him dying, but they did know about him being tortured for days and then unmasked, since they literally saw that on TV....and they know, post Dick’s return, that Dick had been in place undercover before his funeral was even held...the same week he was thought to have died. It should have been obvious to a family of geniuses that all choices made in a matter of days after being tortured and unmasked and who knows what else might have happened offscreen that they could only know about by ASKING him about his ordeal instead of jumping straight to punching him for the choices he made while in the immediate aftermath of massive trauma....like, point is, even without knowing he died, there was always more than enough info they were privy to that there’s no real excuse for their response to his return being judgment instead of concern for how the hell has he been coping with all of that, out there all on his own without anyone he could fully trust, let alone unburden himself to.

None of them spared a single thought for what any of that had been like for him, because they were too focused on their own hurt, and I’m always going to be pissed about that, lmao.

Anyway, apologies if none of that was anything you intended with your word choice, but to be perfectly honest I need very little excuse to go off on a rant about how even the rest of his family’s response to that storyline was like, fundamentally flawed.

NOW. On to your actual question! Because I do have an answer as I’ve thought about this particular thing a LOT, and my ire at both the Spyral storyline and the amnesia storyline coalesced into conjoined seething frustration because of how EASILY they could have avoided making all of the Batfam seem shitty, EVEN BRUCE, and like, also avoided them driving Dick further away rather than bringing him back closer to the family.

All you gotta do....is smash those two stories together and do them both at the same time.

LOL, a few months ago I actually literally wrote out a whole post outlining it in detail here:

https://bigskydreaming.tumblr.com/post/187334221591/if-dc-had-just-combined-their-spyral-and-amnesia

And I’ve copied and pasted the content of that post below the cut here too, just to keep it all in one place for convenience.

As for Dick/Tiger - that’s a whole other post I don’t have time to get into at the moment, but in a nutshell, I’m hugely a fan of their pairing but in specific ways...I mostly see them as each other’s angsty kinda ‘the one that got away, that they could never shake how they got under their skin, but can’t find a way to actually be with, longterm.’ Because the thing is, so much of their dynamic and interactions with each other were clouded by the layers of deception they both wore at all times, and how many different lies they had to tell in service of their whole reason for being there, and how much of themselves they had to hide.

Like, I tend to picture them as kinda both wistfully thinking if they’d met in another life, in another way, without all the cloak and dagger and lies from the very start...they could absolutely be happy together. But as it is, there’s no getting around that they both feel in any kind of relationship, there’d always be some part of them, even if just deep down, that was always keeping an eye open for a crack in the other’s mask, a sign that once again, they were not what they professed to be.

So I see them as being very much that spy vs spy trope, even after Dick goes back to vigilantism and civilian life and even when he and Tiger are theoretically on the same side.....like, I could see them having very emotionally charged, physical, almost desperate kinda encounters in secret whenever they’re in the same city or whatever....because they’re past denying that there’s definitely something between them, always has been, probably always will be...but without even talking about it, just with mutual understanding and implicit agreement, they always know these encounters are just for the night....and then its back to reality. With them thus becoming a kind of escape and fantasy for each other, all rolled up in one and thus inevitably romanticized even further within their own minds...

But they’re also both very pragmatic people, and used to taking what they can get and making the most of it. Its nice to picture the could-have-beens in a world where they met under more honest circumstances, but they live in this world, and here, this is what they can make of what they have, this is what they can make work. So its not all terrible, because if they both ultimately decide this is one of the better outcomes resulting from where they began, which neither of them can change...then it becomes more possible to appreciate what they have for what it is. Even if its not ideal. Or conventional. Or even forever....because I think they both are prepared for it to end if either one of them meets someone who can give them those kinds of nights and still be able to be there in the morning...

But none of that means that what they do have isn’t real, isn’t significant, isn’t as powerful and worthy in its own way as any more conventional relationship.

After all, neither of them are conventional people. They wouldn’t even have met if they were, making a lot of those might-have-beens a moot point. Probably wouldn’t even be as drawn to each other if they were other than what they are, because so much of their dynamic is tangled up in their respect for each other’s skills and convictions and more along those lines.

To be honest, I imagine both of them value and prize each other’s acting ability, their skills with deception and subterfuge....even as those are the very things at the root of why they’ll never be that conventional, longterm couple.

Because it keeps things even between them, and thus even when lying to each other’s faces, there was still an honesty to their dynamic, a balance. Neither is burdened by excessive guilt for deceiving the other, because they both were doing it and they understand why. Thus even when outright deceiving each other, there’s a weird kind of balance there that wouldn’t exist in relationships they had with others who couldn’t match what the other brought to the masquerade, so to speak.

Idk. I have a lot of thoughts on them obviously, lol, and totally meant that all to be another post but got carried away as usual, but I’ll leave it on that note for now, lmao.

How To Make The Spyral Storyline Work (If You Ask Me, which someone literally did so I can get away with saying this).

Ahem.

So. If DC had just combined their Spyral and amnesia stories into one, instead of like the mess we got, we could’ve actually had a good story.

Like, literally all you gotta do is back during Forever Evil, find some way to separate Bruce and Selina from Dick’s body BEFORE Luthor revives him….so Bruce too is of the belief that Dick’s dead, and Luthor being heralded as the one who saved the day from the Crime Syndicate protects him from Bruce or the Batfam’s reprisals.

Then all you gotta do is…instead of Dick getting amnesia like a year later from being shot in the head by KGBeast….Dick gets amnesia from complications in how long it took Luthor to revive him. And of course Luthor capitalizes the HELL out of this.

And then, you can pretty much do everything the same….without it being ANYONE in the Batfamily’s fault, or anyone taking anyone for granted?

You can still have Dick go undercover in Spyral, be Agent 37….only now its on Luthor’s orders, because Dick woke up with no memories and all he knows about himself or like, anything, is whatever Luthor tells him.

And he knows SOMETHING’S not right about everything, like, something’s off about the person he feels like he is and the person Luthor claims that he is, but Luthor’s savvy enough that he’s not forcing Dick to do anything that might trigger some buried memories or built in moral resistance to an order, he’s invested in keeping Dick as fully cooperative for as long as possible, because he knows Dick will be way more effective if he’s on board with stuff than actively fighting things. So Luthor has Dick sold on the idea that he’s infiltrating Spyral on behalf of the good guys, like Dick thinks he’s fine with doing morally gray stuff but isn’t full on trigger happy so Luthor doesn’t force him to kill people on his behalf and thus Dick’s time in Spyral and his character conflicts with Helena, Tiger, etc, remain largely the same.

And meanwhile, Dick’s in the dark about his real identity and past because not having any clue he’s alive, the Batfamily reluctantly has been doing their best to bury details of the late Dick Grayson, no matter how much they hate it, because they have to worry about the living members of their family and try and distance themselves from Dick post being-unmasked, so nobody connects the dots to all of them.

And then of course, eventually one of them runs into someone who reminds them suspiciously of Dick on a case, like his face is still all swirly because of the Hypnos implants but he says or does something that’s so quintessentially Dick Grayson that they can’t NOT wonder. Because here, Dick doesn’t KNOW to tamp down on his natural quips and banter or mannerisms around the Batfamily, and so they give him away even as he remains faceless, and there’s not really any way Luthor could have seen that coming or prevented it, without like….scripting everything Dick says or does in every possible encounter he has, which of course is impossible.

And so THEN ultimately, you can have one or two Batfam members pursuing possibilities that Dick’s alive on their own, and then eventually comparing notes and realizing Dick really IS alive, what Luthor must have done, and that Dick didn’t come home because Dick literally doesn’t remember where or what home is…..

And then whammo ka-blammo, its Fully United Batfamily To The Rescue as they basically just invade Spyral and blow it to Kingdom Come whilst convincing Dick that he’s their brother/son/friend and belongs with them and Lex Luthor is a lying liar who lies, SEARCH YOUR HEART, FEEL YOUR FEELINGS, YOU KNOW WE SPEAK THE TRUTH and blah blah blah et cetera et cetera et yada yada.

And nobody ever has to read Tom King and Scott Lobdell’s like…..*gestures disgustedly in the general direction of their utter tripe*….That.