#somethign wrong with me perhaps

[ethosiab]

[19] turns out 6 seconds of unlooping animation is actually kind of a lot. excuse the choppiness it's 11pm and i have to leave for class at 7 tomorrow <3

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[higgs-the-god]

barney (involuntarily) shares his end of the story

[hauntedwitch04]

Bdays cake

brother!Den Winchester x sister!reader

(Dean x Cas because Destiel is my ship and they deserve to be happy)

Words: about 2.0k words

Warnings: sad Dean (my love), John Winchester (in this account John Winchester is a worse enemy and more evil than Lucifer, at the end I kinda love my Luci :) ), lovely Cas, lovely moment between siblings

Author's note: Hi! Here another one shot fo the series for my birthday. Tomorrow is my birthday and I'm kinda freakin' out because i have my first exams of uni :). Hope you like it loves, with love your witch Becky

p.s I'm at season 6, so plese be kind with comment if i got somethign wrong :)

Requests are open I Ask

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-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-..-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Dean loves cakes.

And this I think is a universally known truth.

And he's also a decent cook, if we have to be honest, but if we really have to find something that he can't cook, well that's cakes.

Today is your birthday, his beloved little sister, whom he still finds hard to believe has grown up enough to be 19 years old, yet just today he had gone to the supermarket to buy candles, since the nine had now been lost since you celebrated your nine years many years ago and the one they had used the year before for your 18th birthday had melted after Cas had used it as a Christmas candle, thinking it was a badly made candy cane. As a matter of fact, the cashier had smiled at him when she had seen his purchase, along with all the ingredients for the cake she is making, and had asked him how old you were and he in turn, trying to be cordial to the old lady had replied that you would be 19 the next day, today. The lady had smiled even more and told him something like, "It's bad to see one's children grow up so fast, I guess all you would want is for your little girl to still be little." Those words had upset Dean a bit because: first, he had not thought he looked so old that he could have a 19-year-old daughter (Cas, in fact, had spent hours trying to convince her beloved husband, who had been staring at himself in front of the mirror, that he didn't actually look that old and that the lady probably couldn't see that well); second, that indeed perhaps those words were true.

You were born out of a one-night stand, had with a woman in some state that he doesn't even remember, of his father; in fact all Dean remembers is that one day, when he was in his early twenties, his father had walked through the motel door with a bundle of blankets in his hand, and inside in that comfortable chest was you. His life had improved with a simple little human, in fact that day had changed his life, and for that it was the best day of his existence.

Sam had been leaving him for a while, and he had never felt so lonely as he did during those years, and then you had come along, and everything had improved so damn much. Sam had learned about you from a call at two o'clock in the morning from his brother as soon as you had arrived, and immediately asked him to come over to find out about the new addition to the family, and loving you immensely from the first time he had held you in his arms, and found out that Dean was already going crazy not wanting to miss a single thing with you and buying every baby thing he saw in the supermarkets.

For a long time he had been trying to keep you out of his life, leaving you with Bobby and a few other trusted people, but then he couldn't keep you away from himself anymore, coming to see you every chance he got even driving days at a time without stopping, because you were always his light, his tender little reason for living.

Over time you had grown and become a great hunter, having great teachers.

You have always been related to both of your brothers then, but with Dean there has always been a special relationship, you have always been accomplices, each other's halves, and because of that until he met Castiel, Dean was convinced that you were his soul mate.

And it hurts him to see you grow up, to see you become an adult, you his sweet, innocent little girl making drawings to hang on Bobby's fridge with you, your favorite big brother and a gutted monster on them. (Dean also will never confess it to you, because he is too used to not letting on how he feels, but he still has in a box in the back of his closet all the things you gave him when you were little, a box full of mementos, candy, labels and especially all those drawings, wanting to somehow trap little baby you).

But coming back to this moment, we left our Dean intending to read the recipe for your favorite cake, thinking it was very easy, much easier than the website would have you believe. So he takes the ingredients he had bought the day before and begins our great hero's adventure against the most treacherous monster of all: the bakery.

A few minutes pass and already the oldest Winchester finds himself covered in flour, butter and something he cannot recognize, and all having not even opened the flour yet, and for that he does not understand how it was possible.

Cas at the door lets out a small laugh as she looks at her busy husband, who upon hearing it looks up and gives him the middle finger.

"Are you still sure you want to do this? We all know you're not a bad cook, but when it comes to pies you're not exactly the best person for the job." Confesses the angel, approaching Dean, then trying to wipe his cheek before leaving him a kiss in the small area he had obtained.

"She deserves it. I-I have to make her a cake, I have to do something to show her that she is very important to me, she is my little girl, I love her." The man says, gradually shutting off his voice, hoping her husband would not hear the last words, still ashamed a little that he might look weak in her eyes, even though she had now seen him in all his lowest moments and had loved him even in those moments. Cas shakes her head, as we all are doing after all, and looks at the man she loves enough to deny her past and embrace a new present, dreaming of a wonderful future.

"And just tell her what you told me? Don't think I'm not happy that you want to bake her cake, I'm convinced it's a wonderful idea, but it would be even better perhaps if you bake the cake together. She loves to bake, especially cakes for you, why not do it together this time?" Proposes the shorter man of the two, looking into the eyes of Dean who was currently holding back tears, feeling for the umpteenth time as wrong, useless and incapable as when after a hunt gone wrong his father scolded him and beat him until he almost fell unconscious after yet another beer too many.

"Precisely because of that, I have to do it for her. I know perfectly well what it's like to have the need to make sure you do everything to make others feel good, without thinking of yourself, and I don't want her to feel that way too, that the cakes she bakes for me are a duty. I want to return the favor, and for once do it to her." Winchester counters, trying to hide his distress from the piercing blue eyes of the angel he loves so much.

"Then let me help you." Cas begs him, taking his still soiled hands, not caring that he too is now covered in flour, before wrapping leave them to wrap his arms around the waist of the man who had stolen his heart ever since he had seen him in Hell, causing him to plummet, literally dare I say it, from his home.

Dean doesn't find the strength to answer right away, but shakes his head vehemently, before saying in a low voice that he had to do it alone, that he couldn't be helped or the guilt would grip him for who knows how long. This time it is Cas's turn to shake his head, commenting as loudly as all the Winchesters he knows thus emphasizing that John is not for a dick's sake like his sons by reiterating once again the eternal hatred he feels for that existing being who had helped bring his favorite siblings into the world, highlighting how they were frighteningly the same: stubborn, proud, and stupidly and bravely the most selfless and good people he knows.

The sweet and affectionate scene between the two, to the detriment of us poor readers, is interrupted by a voice, yours, which you cannot help but comment on the angel's words.

"Well my dear, you have bound yourself to us with a bond worse than a pact with Crowley himself by marrying that old man." You laughingly comment, looking around the kitchen a bit as you wonder what happened: whether a bomb went off or your brother and his husband decided to have crazy sex while cooking themselves a romantic dinner.

"What happened here?" You ask, then rest your eyes on Dean's red ones, which had let go a few minutes ago in a silent cry on Cas's shoulder.

The angel mumbles an excuse and runs out of the kitchen, leaving you alone, and you immediately hug your brother, not knowing what else to do.

"Sorry, I don't know what else to say. Sorry for not being what you deserve, I wanted to make a cake to celebrate your birthday, but I couldn't even make a fucking easy cake. I am a terrible person, I failed, just like dad failed. I wanted to be better for you, I wanted you to have everything I didn't have, and I feel like shit because I couldn't do it." Dean confesses tearfully as he clutches your figure in your mighty arms, and you can't help but cry in turn and hold him even tighter to you, and sob against his chest.

"Don't even joke about it, you have always been, are and will always be great. You are the only reason I didn't run away from Dad, because I wanted you, and I love you so much, that I can't leave you even for a second because you are a fundamental part of my happiness." You answer, in a voice just loud enough for him to hear you. "I love you, because of what you do and what you are, not because of what you feel obligated to do."

"I love you too little one, much more than you know." He confesses in turn. You stay like this for a while in each other's arms, doing nothing and enjoying each other's presence, until you propose something.

"How about we go see a movie, maybe one of the cartoons we like so much, and then tomorrow, since it's my birthday, we'll all have a cake together, with even those two assholes behind the door who are trying to hide." You comment, seeing Sam and Cas come out of the corner where they were hiding.

They, a little guilty, apologize but you say it's nothing and together they all went to see a movie together, like the beautiful and happy, if a little unfortunate in some (many) cases.

Now the story does not end here, but how about giving these poor people some privacy, I think they have suffered enough already. I hope this little story, good continuation and good research to the next fanfiction to read, from your prophetess Chuck-no sorry Becky is all, with love, to our next fanfiction.

TAGLIST

@cheyennep3107 @mortica-raven13 @theviewfromtheotherside @supernatural-lvr @imnotcryingurcrying-blog

[clarinettispaghetti]

Every once in a while i remember 70% of my art is sincere Garfield anime crossover fanart and I wonder if perhaps there is somethign wrong with me

[quzen]

i used to be funny

actually i think perhaps there was just somethign wrong with me....

Why the fuck did i say this????

[drawlfoy]

Omg that sounds soo cool!! Could you draw one for me s'il-vous plaît?🥺

OF COURSE ok i just drew some cards for you and can i just say they flew out of the deck so quick after i asked what was in store for you this month

card 1: temperance reversed

card 2: the tower (....)

card 3: king of pentacles reversed

ok so ngl this month might be a little hectic for you as it's 66% major arcana cards. plz take care of yourself and check in consistently with how you're doing. i definitely recommend maybe meditating if you don't already make a habit of it and establishing strong routines you know you can depend on even if things get hectic.

onto the rest of the cards: we'll get into the tower card in a second (as that's pretty infamous in the deck) but i'm getting a feeling that something's been "off" with you lately. you might not be able to put a finger on it, but perhaps you've been struggling with this weird nagging feeling of stuff not quite being right. this could stem from a variety of things, but most often it has something to do with the fact that you haven't been paying enough attention to your physical body/your surroundings. it also appears as though you've had an unhealthy relationship with finances and status, which can manifest in either overspending to keep up w other people or just simply obsessing over your personal finances. take a breath, check in with your physical form, and adjust what's bothering you because whatever it is will probably not go away until you regret it.

don't be too scared of the tower card. sometimes when it comes up in a reading it can mean a drastic, negative change might be coming (which can be in a form of a loss), but in context, your other cards don't really reflect that. instead, i think the tower is calling upon you to seriously self-reflect and embrace any internal chaos going on inside of you. the only way to work through your discomfort/this feeling of wrongness you might have is to face it head on as the chaos in the tower card is unavoidable. at the end, though, the tower isn't entirely negative! it means that you're going to come out of this as someone who's more concrete in their beliefs and feels more authentic in every sense of the word.

tldr somethign might feel kind of wrong and like you're just "off". whatever emotional chaos or frustration you're feeling needs to be addressed head on and can't be put off, but this is ultimately for your benefit

[sharp-teeth-and-archived]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐀 𝐑𝐏 𝐏𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐓 / 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐄.

First and foremost, recall that no one is perfect, we all had witnessed some plotting once which did not went too well, be it because of us or our partner. So here have this, which may help for future plotting. It’s a lot! Yes, but perhaps give your partners some insight? Anyway BOLD what fully applies, italicize if only somewhat. Long post!

MUN NAME: Bambi / Eden     AGE: 18       CONTACT: IM, Ask, Discord (search discord up on my blog)

CHARACTER(S): a shit ton

CURRENT FANDOM(S): Dragon Age, rdr2, assassin’s creed, star wars (sorta??)

FANDOM(S) YOU HAVE AN AU FOR:  Modern verse, r.dr2, da, skyrim (haven’t touched my bio for it for a while so I may have to touch it up a bit) and that’s pretty much it for any au verse. They’re just crossover verses.

MY LANGUAGE(S): English.

THEMES I’M INTERESTED IN FOR RP: FANTASY / SCIENCE FICTION / HORROR / WESTERN ( my brand ) / ROMANCE / THRILLER / MYSTERY / DYSTOPIA / ADVENTURE / MODERN / EROTIC / CRIME / MYTHOLOGY / CLASSIC / HISTORY (my 2nd brand) / RENAISSANCE / MEDIEVAL / ANCIENT / WAR / FAMILY / POLITICS / RELIGION / SCHOOL / ADULTHOOD / CHILDHOOD / APOCALYPTIC / GODS / SPORT / MUSIC / SCIENCE / FIGHTS / ANGST / SMUT / DRAMA / ETC.  ( I’m open to most things, it just depends on plot & muse )

PREFERRED THREAD LENGTH: ONE-LINER (it happens but I tend to not favor it) / 1 PARA / 2 PARA / 3+ PARA / NOVELLA. / ALL

ASKS CAN BE SEND BY: MUTUALS / NON-MUTUALS / PERSONALS / ANONS.

CAN ASKS BE CONTINUED?: YES / NO / OCCASIONALLY   - only by Mutuals?:  YES / NO

PREFERRED THREAD TYPE: CRACK / CASUAL / SERIOUS / DEEP AS HECK. / ALL

IS REALISM / RESEARCH IMPORTANT FOR YOU IN CERTAIN THEMES?:   YES / NO.

ARE YOU ATM OPEN FOR NEW PLOTS?:  YES / NO / DEPENDS.

DO YOU HANDLE YOUR DRAFT / ASK - COUNT WELL?:  YES / NO / SOMEWHAT. 

HOW LONG DO YOU USUALLY TAKE TO REPLY?: 24H / 1 WEEK / 2 WEEKS / 3+ WEEKS / MONTHS / YEARS. / DEPENDS ON MOOD AND INSPIRATION, AND IF I’M BUSY

I’M OKAY INTERACTING WITH: ORIGINAL CHARACTERS / A RELATIVE OF MY CHARACTER (AN OC) / DUPLICATES / CROSSOVERS / MULTI-MUSES / SELF-INSERTS / PEOPLE WITH NO AU VERSE FOR MY FANDOM (really depends on if you have oen in mind and we discussed it, it’s just not posted) / CANON-DIVERGENT PORTRAYALS / AU-VERSIONS.

DO YOU POST MORE IC OR OOC?: IC / OOC. ( varies, but overall I tend to post more ooc? )

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WITH FOLLOWING OTHERS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.  

BEST WAYS TO APPROACH YOU FOR RP/PLOTTING:  im me or talk to me over discord

WHAT EXPECTATIONS DO YOU HOLD TOWARDS YOUR PLOTTING PARTNER: Not too much? I’d like for there to be a plot in mind, but I can understand if that’s not the case. I’ve had instances where I want to interact with a character, but have absolutely no idea in mind. Usually sendign in an ask meme can help in that regard.

WHEN YOU NOTICE THE PLOTTING IS RATHER ONE-SIDED, WHAT DO YOU DO?:  I strive to not be one-sided myself, but I do have instances where I can’t think of anything. I’m not sure? Maybe ask the other person if they’re into it or if something else is at play (dealign with real life problems and it just affects their mood voerall).

HOW DO YOU USUALLY PLOT WITH OTHERS, DO YOU GIVE INPUT OR LEAVE MOST WORK TOWARDS YOUR PARTNER?:  I always try to give ideas of my own if I have any. Coming to a equally agreed, general idea is fine. I’ve had instances where I was on both sides of this, but I always try to add input and be equal with the other person.

WHEN A PARTNER DROPS THE THREAD, DO YOU WISH TO KNOW?:   YES / NO / DEPENDS. - AND WHY?: Sometimes I don’t notice it, but sometimes I do. Generally, I like to know, but I understand if someone doesn’t wan tto reach out. Just at least try to let me know and we’re fine. 

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY LEAD YOU TO DROP A THREAD?:  It depends really. Sometimes I just don’t have muse for a thread, or an instance where I have dropped a muse entirely. Sometimes it can be timing, but that’s rarely the issue. Most of the time it’s just I can’t think of anything and I feel like it hasn’t really gone anywhere? I have stuff in my queue for a while, so soemtimes it appears that way until it’s posted and I’m sorry about that.

WILL YOU TELL YOUR PARTNER?:   YES / NO / DEPENDS. ( I do have instances where I was forgetful and I haven’t told my partner int he apst adn I’m sorry about that. )

IS COMMUNICATION IN THE RPC IMPORTANT TO YOU? YES / NO. - AND WHY?: I don’t need to be tlaked every day, but stronger friendships ( ooc & ic ) are formed when I talk to a person. It doesn’t need to be often, but it helps me understand your chaarcter and your approach. With that, I can come up with ideas and understand you rmuse more. I understand if people aren’t fond of ooc chatting, that’s completely understandable to me.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH ABSOLUTE HONESTY, EVEN IF IT MAY MEANS HEARING SOMETHING NEGATIVE ABOUT YOU AND/OR PORTRAYAL?: Criticsm is a good way to grow. Criticsm is different from completely bashing a perosn’s portrayal and not giving any pointers (ex: “your portrayal sucks.”). Or even for a person. If you feel like I am portraying something wrong, like depression or something similar, let me know. If you feel like Lydia’s adhd isn’t properly portrayed, let me know. 

DO YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE SUCH SITUATION IN A MATURE WAY? YES / NO.

WHY DO YOU RP AGAIN, IS THERE A GOAL?: All of my muses are written and taken an interest in for different reasons, sometimes I don’t even know why I decided to write them. I roleplay because I love exploring different characters and dyanamics and it’s easier for me to write like this than forming my own story. But a goal in mind? Be a good rp partner I guess? Or at least try to make things interesting and try my best to portray my characters correctly or in an intruiging manner. 

WISHLIST, BE IT PLOTS OR SCENARIOS:  Varies on muse. I have different plots in my wishlist tag: ( wishlist ). 

THEMES I WON’T EVER RP / EXPLORE:   Potential triggering content ahead. Rape, noncon, abuse, incest, drug use -not alcohol- ( lyrium I can write fine, it’s just the realistic stuff I can’t do. ), inappropiate under age stuff. Themes where I write a stalker. Sexism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, and racism will never be mentioned by any of my characters. I won’t write smut probably ever, so themes with that I tend to not write. Very likely more, I just can’t think of anything. Within dragon age, I do have a characetr ( Sera ) who will refer to elves as elfy-elves and be pretty anti-elf, which can be triggering to others. Also, animal abuse or gore of any kind.

WHAT TYPE OF STARTERS DO YOU PREFER / DISLIKE, CAN’T WORK WITH?: I can’t work with starters that don’t really have any dialogue (handing something over with nothing vocally said is fine, but when someone is just sitting there, that’s harder to work with unless somethign is plotted). Generally, I like outside circumstances to be explained (locaiton, where in a game/setting this might be occuring, etc), I really like when dialogue is added and body landguage is explained/noted.

WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE MOST?:  Honestly? it varies. I tend to really be into deep, complex characters or characters that appear can be sterred in that direction with more added. Bubbly, energetic characters, fighters (typically female). Quick witted or flirty characters & mysterious types. 

WHAT TYPE OF CHARACTERS CATCH YOUR INTEREST THE LEAST?:  I hate using the term but mary-sue/gary-sue. I hate saying that, but if a character has no flaws, I won’t be interested. Or characters that seem to just be placed there with no development. 

WHAT ARE YOUR STRONG ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: I try to add as much effort, or at least a lot of effort, in replies & interaction. I am very open-minded and when I get passionate about soemthing, you can really tell. I am easy-going, so feel free to tell me if you want to drop a thread or have a concern. I tend to work well of other’s people’s ideas, usually able to add my own.

WHAT ARE YOUR WEAK ASPECTS AS RP PARTNER?: I am slow and my queue tends to be slow since I try not to overhwelm myself and stress myself out to the heavens. I try to reach out, but sometimes I just can’t think of anything to say. My muse can be very flickle at times, so replies to stuff can vary. My msue tends to be more for ask memes than replies at times. 

DO YOU RP SMUT?:  YES / NO / DEPENDS. 

DO YOU PREFER TO GO INTO DETAIL?: YES / NO / DEPENDS. 

ARE YOU OKAY WITH BLACK CURTAIN, FADE TO BLACK?: YES / NO.

WHEN DO YOU RP SMUT? MORE OUT OF FUN OR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT?:

ANYTHING YOU WOULD NOT WANT TO RP THERE?:  all of it

ARE SHIPS IMPORTANT TO YOU?:   YES / NO 

WOULD YOU SAY YOUR BLOG IS SHIP-FOCUSED?: YES / NO. ( I love ships, but I am selective with it and require chemistry -unless I know your muse and you occ super, super well-. It’s nice but it isn’t he full focus of this blog. I want to explore my characters and witness other people’s characters and their development. )

DO YOU USE READ MORE?:  YES / NO / SOMETIMES WHEN I WRITE LONG STUFF.

ARE YOU:  MULTI-SHIP / SINGLE-SHIP ( Jacob ) / DUAL-SHIP  —  MULTIVERSE / SINGLEVERSE.

WHAT DO YOU LOVE TO EXPLORE THE MOST IN YOUR SHIPS?: Varies on muse, but for my rdr2 characters I’ve been really wanting a sorta of “outside” character where they aren’t directly involved in the gang, but they are in a relationship with oen of their members. Where my muse,w hose in the gang, will tell you rmuse about it and the whole aftermath of everything. Where their partner will understand to an extent, but try to undestand? if that makes sense? I also want enemies to work on a job/project together and deal with that. But this all also varies on muse.

ARE YOU OKAY WITH PRE-ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIPS?: YES / NO / DEPENDS.  ( I find it easier to write to assume people knwo each other, but an immediate friendship isn’t required. Like my muse may know yours or hear about yours, but they haven’t directly met you before ). 

► SECTION ABOUT YOUR MUSE.

- WHAT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE YOUR MUSE INTERESTING TOWARDS OTHERS, WHY SHOULD THEY RP WITH THIS PARTICULAR CHARACTER OF YOURS NOW, WHAT POSSIBLE PLOTS DO THEY OFFER?: I have a large amount of different muses, but all of my muses all bring something new to the table. Want a guy who seems nice, but can be an asshole with a flick of a dime, who has a secret betrayal plot hidden behind his back? Pick Robert. Want a guy who’s humurous but seems to be hiding under a fake persona? Pick Charley. Want a female assassin who’s very talented anr professional in her work to a fault with her work-alcoholic ways? Pick Evie. Want a sweet and caring character with a heart of gold and will give you advice and comfort? Pick Cassie It depends on the plot, too, but I try my best to add as much to reply to to another. If you ever want more added, tell me! I could give multiple plots, so it’s really hard to put something down.

WITH WHAT TYPE OF MUSES DO YOU USUALLY STRUGGLE TO RP WITH?:  If someone isn’t interested or outwardly hateful of my muse without a valid reason when starting to interact. Beign enemies is fine, but maybe we could write how it became that way? This really varies, so don’t let this steer you away. Just give me something to work with, brign soemthing to the tbale, and I’m usually fine.

WHAT DO THEY DESIRE, WHAT IS THEIR GOAL?:  Varies on muse. Robert: fame/recognition, a legend made out of him. Charley: just to live life happy? He wants to be okay money-wise. Evie: to take down the Templars & help the people of London, not fail and always be successful and outwit her foes. Cassie: everyone around her happy. Sean: His gang to be successful, btu also be sucessful himself, he wants to be admired as well.

WHAT CATCHES THEIR INTEREST FIRST WHEN MEETING SOMEONE NEW?:  Just using the same muses lmao. Robert: Someone who just listens to him and isn’t quick to make fun of him. Charley: If they have a sense of humor and someone he can stand, he’s pretty much fine tbh. Evie: If they can give her any information or aid with her cause. Cassie: How they are feeling. If they let her just listen and seem more open than closed off. Very personality-based. Sean: soemtimes looks, but mostly if they have a similar personality as him.

WHAT DO THEY VALUE IN A PERSON?:  Evie: devotion, kind spriit, efficiency, loyalty. Robert: willingness and empathy despite having little himself. Charley: Honesty. Cassie: Consistency. Sean: reliability. 

WHAT THEMES DO THEY LIKE TALKING ABOUT?:  generally all of them like books (except Sean), events around them, their interests.

WHICH THEMES BORE THEM?:  For half of them, anything mundane or boring. Anything that isn’t relating to anything that’s spoken around / surrounds them.

DID THEY EVER WENT THROUGH SOMETHING TRAUMATIC?:  Robert & Charley (more Robert) witnessed a murder, Robert actually doing that act. Cassie: hearing about the violent nature of her father’s death. Sean: the things he went through with the bounty hunters.

WHAT COULD LEAD TO AN INSTANT KILL?:  A gunshot or anything that could overpower them.

IS THERE SOMEONE /-THING THEY HATE?:  Sean: rich people, Scots for some reason, English people sometimes. When someone disagrees with him on soemthing he is passionate about. Pronouncing and Irish word wrong. O’Driscolls & anyone that’s an enemy of the gang. Evie: Templars, Starrick & Lucy Thorne. People who lie or misled her or others. Injustice. Robert: Someone makign fun of him tbh. Charley: People who don’t plan out anything or are really reckless.

IS YOUR MUSE EASY TO APPROACH?: YES / NO.    - BEST WAY TO APPROACH THEM?: Talk to them. Initiate a conversation. Pretty much that across the board. 

SOMETHING YOU MAY STILL WANT TO POINT OUT ABOUT YOUR MUSE?: None of my muses are perfect. Some are worse than others, but generally msot of my muses will listen to you and usually be nice to you if you appraoch them well. All my muses are different from one another, so expect different results / reactions

CONGRATS!!! You managed it, now tag your mutuals! ♥

TAGGED: stole it

 TAGGING: steal it and pelase tag me ! I want to see your results

[bulletproofscales]

Is there a chance we could get a really gassy Jungkookie w any member? Like, Jungkook was so stuffed and was drinking soda and couldn’t stop burping? Love your blog❤️❤️

--SOO,, u mentioned anymember so i took the liberty of making this a hOPEKOOK FIC!! Ive really wanted to write somethign about them and experiment with their amazing dynamic. It was so HARD!! i tried to balance them exploring their relationship and feelings for eachothr (since its such an uncommon ship) whilst trying to stay on track with your reuqest... I really hope you enjoy it!!-- 

---

By how fun the director had made the commercial sound, this Coca Cola promotion was truly: a drag. Of course, no promotion could be entirely fun, Jungkook likes to keep it professional; so he never once complained, and tried to be as collaborative as everyone else was. Besides, it wasn't all bad, look at all the free soda they were giving them! Ok. Perhaps Jungkook was drowning his boredom in Coke. But, he didn't notice until he felt a strain of discomfort.

He tried to maintain a straight face as best as he could, they were still in the middle of the recording. In his mind trying to remember how he got into this state in the first place. It slowly came to him, the unconscious need to have a bottle in hand during the whole pre-recording, make-up, and rehearsal. Trying to keep count he stood in disbelief when he remembered his tenth Coca Cola. In fact, he could still perfectly remember the feeling. His stomach getting harder by the bottle, but i'm only being automatically motivated to more. He peeked down discreetly and there it was: his taun stomach pressing firmly against the white t-shirt they had dressed him in. Just the thought of how careless he had been about his surroundings, made the boy blush a deep shade of crimson. Luckily enough, all his hyungs were much more professional than him and were way too concentrated on what was going on in the recording to notice, this time...or, any of the... other times.

If he had to come clean, Jungkook had sometimes had the habit of, overdoing it; whatever it was. He never really understood the reason behind this actitudes; thought to himself he had the courage to acknowledge: he liked the way fullness felt. It felt safe, warm and fun. And as mysterious as its reasoning was, or the vagueness behind what it was that he liked, reall; the maknae still knew nobody had to find out about this. If it was so confusing to he himself, he couldn't imagine trying to explain it to someone else. However it was so consuming, so inviting; he couldn't bring himself to stop. He figured if done every once in a while in the privacy of his locked door, nothing bad would come from it. 

But this was certainly not the place. All this time he'd been spacing out the director was giving corrections for the next shot; which was by far the most fun out the bunch. For Jungkook's bloated stomach though, it was going to be only insufferable pain. Of course, he already knew what he had to do; even with his incautious behavior now, he had studied the scene before even coming into set. That made him dread this scene even more; he could barely walk without having his midsection send a wave of pain coursing through his entire body, let alone jumping excitedly into a pool. He put himself in his position, closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and prepared himself for the discomfort he was about to feel. 

"Everybody! Take five!" HIs eyes snapped open and look like they were about to fall of his skull. He took no time bothering in explaining anybody why he pathetically waddled or attempted to run to the toilet.

When he finally got there, he noticed it was a one person only bathroom, which in a way brought him some sense of comfort. Knowing nobody else would be there. He knocked almost excitedly on the door, just to check before locking himself in. Promptly sitting on toilet, JUngkook couldn't help the relaxed sigh that escaped his lips. He peaked down like he had done back in the recording, fearful of what he might find at the bottom; with anticipating undertones. Except this time, he could keep staring in awe. 

His stomach has ballooned enormously, to the point where the waistband of his swimming trunks were interfering with his hardened dome. With slightly shaking hands he reached for said wasteland, and began pushing it down slowly; mesmerized by the continuously skin being exposed. Flesh taunt with gas, pushing outwards like he had swollen a melon. Once they were all the way down to his crotch, Jungkook was still struck with his own body. The way the enormous amounts of liquids had been able to fade away almost every sign of muscle that was there not too long ago. Or the way his stomach now was big enough to cover some of the view of his lap. HIs large hands left their resting place on his muscular thighs and grazed above the hardened flesh tentatively. Slowly, they descend until placed on top of the bloated midsection. Without any force, Jungkook began moving his hands around the dome with care. Not pushing enough to press the gas ou, but he didn't want that; he wanted to stay like this for as long as he possibly could. His eyes still strained to the exposed skin he stayed there caressing himself for what felt like an eternity. Nothing mattered now, not the recording, not the five minute break. This moment was only for himself- There someone banging on the door. 

 When Jungkook had come into BigHit as a trainee he was well accustomed with the fact that he liked men as well as women; so seeing not only Hoseok, but all of his other members as handsome young men wasn't a surprised. However, nothing had prepared him for the dancer's caring and outgoing personality, that would become the one thing helping Jungkook out of his shell to the others. Back in the day, Hoseok was the only people he felt comfortable with. It didn't take long for a crush to appear. 

Throughout the years, Jungkook has had to suffer through cuddles and forehead kisses from the man he's been crushing on for years. It is hell. To know Hoseok is filled with love and needs to express it even without it being romantic really hurt. But he couldn't even be mad about it, it was Hoseok's way of being and it was endearing to say the least. Eventually he stopped asking him for touch and affection, Jungkook reckoned that if he did he was probably taking advantage of Hoseok's loving personality. Recently, he older had caught him off guard, asking him if anything was wrong; he really didn't know what to answer, so he didn't. Needless to say, things were conflictive between the two at the moment. 

"Jungkook, is everything alright? Can I come in?" You could feel his tone becoming more stern, but the care was always there. Guilty, the maknae thought about how he shut Hoseok out the other day. And how, as embarrassing as this was, he couldn't bring himself to do it again. So he inhaled deeply, feeling his stomach push out even more it even stung a little. Exhaled, and opened the door into the stall. Hoseok walked in, and stared at the younger intently. The compromising position made Jungkook's entire body warm up with shame. He immediately felt the need to explain himself. 

"I-It was an accident! I didn't notice how much I had drank until my stomach was all bloated, and I tried to keep it professional, but it had started to hurt so I came in here..." He wouldn't dare to look at the older man in the eyes, he knew if he did his voice would shake even more than it already was. The silence was suffocating, so he continued. "I was about to take care of it! Y-You don't even need to be here, it's-fine I got it." He explained quickly when he saw the dancer kneel before him.

"Let me help." He sounded so gentle yet so determined. All those times he had stuffed himself as to be taken care of, he had had always wished of having Hoseok be the one to pamper him, and soothe him. Regardless, he was going to protest, but the older beat him to it. "What where you going to do?"

"Um, well... I usually rub my stomach, to help me get the burps out... You really don't have to-?"

"Can I?" He interrupted. To which Jungkook, taken aback, nodded slowly. 

Hoseok's eyes were fixated on the large expanse of skin before him, his dainty fingers slowly reaching for the hardened dome.

"The break is over! We need you on set!" Somebody abnged n the door and yelled from the outside. 

"Just a minute!" Hoseok exclaimed happily as if nothing strange were happening inside the stall. When his eyes came back to Jungkook they had changed; they didn't have that caring and gentle aspect they had before, now he looked determined. 

Without any warning, he placed his hands firmly on Jungkook's stomach; the younger man gasped at the feeling. Hoseok's hands were smaller than hid, making him feel a lot bigger than he actually was. And without waiting another second he began kneading the skin with strength and speed. 

Without any warning, he placed his hands firmly on Jungkook's stomach; the younger man gasped at the feeling. Hoseok's hands were smaller than hid, making him feel a lot bigger than he actually was. And without waiting another second he began kneading the skin with strength and speed. The maknae's eyes widened at the sensation, the hands pushing in and out of his taunt flesh had him feeling all sorts of things. Although weird, he couldn't help but think of how intimate this situation was, freeing butterflies inside his stomach. Wait, no. It's a burp. 

Loud and gurgly, it resonated on the ceramic walls. Jungkook's face grew even redder. But when he looked at the dancer for his reaction, satisfied smile was not what he was expecting. The older moved his hands to the very bottom of his stomach, urging all of the has to come out. Even if dainty, Hoseok's hands were massaging the flesh like his life depended on it. Groping tightly, squishing between fingers urging the gas to come out. And it did, repeatedly so. Jungkook felt his body relax form the tension in his stomach leaving, however he could not bare with the embarrassment that the he felt; using his hands to cover his face and burping through them. 

"Do you feel any better?" He asked with care, to which he nodded, head still buried deep in his own hold. "Ok then, let's get out, they are waiting for us" The older man stood up and offered a helping hand for Jungkook to do the same. He took it and together they walked out of the stall and into the set.

Luckily the wait hadn't even been that long as they had feared, it took a little bit of the guilt but it didn't change the fact that this was horrible, this felt horrible. Jungkook had never felt more disgusting and appealing in his life, feeling the silent judgement form his crush out of all people. Of course, he wasn't showing it, yet it was only natural to judge someone under such bizarre circumstances. How was he supposed to talk to Hoseok after this? He might as well have confessed and be let down, at least that's a normal way to ruin a friendship. 

The recording went by smoothly, although he couldn't help but go into shut down more. He cooperated throughout but he did not want to speak to anybody; it was especially hard pretending to be enjoying yourself and having a blast, but somehow he managed. In moments like this, Jungkook truly felt completely unaware of his surroundings; he didn't know how much time had gone by, the people talking felt like faint background noises and all he could hear were his own thoughts resonating inside his head. Eventually, it was over and they could go home. 

The ride home went smoothly, the rest of the group chatting animatedly about the recording. He chose to pretend to be asleep; he knew that if any of his hyungs saw him even slightly upset, they wouldn't let it go. He walked to their dorm, stilll faking his tiredness but slowly becoming real, and walked into his room. He laid there, drowning in self pity.

Beer. That's what he needed. He quickly changed and headed for the door, some of the other members were there. He reassured them he was going out to get something to drink, he would be right back. As he gto outside, Jungkook considered actually going to a bar or rather buying the beer and drinking it in the comfort of his room. The latter sounded better.It was already dark so the streets were not nearly as packed, a beanie and a mask should do it. Living in such an exclusive part of Seoul, he had to actually walk for a couple of minutes to get to the first convience store. However, he needed the walk, think about everything by himself; his feelings for Hoseok, what had happened today, the odler's response, his own reaction. It all seemed like such a mess, and mostly like he has put himself on this position. He was the one who took advantage of Hoseok to the point where it damaged their relationship. He got out of the store almost as soon as he walked in, the only difference was that now he had two large packs of beer inside of a bag and was determinedly or almost excitedly walking back to their shared apartment.  He sprinted trying his best not to shake the dozens of cans he was carrying with him to his room. He went by so fast, that nobody really had the time to process nor worry about what the maknae might be up to; they were all really tired form the recording and they recon even Jungkook might appreciate the space alone. 

He sat in his desk, and turned on his computer, looking for the playlist he truly wanted to listen to at a time like this. Once he heard the soft tunes begin to play, he physically relaxed into his chair, closing his eyes and letting a long sigh escape through his parted lips. And without further ado, he began to drink. 

 It was so easy to get lost in what he was doing, the movement of the can form the desk to Jungkook's mouth almost automatic, the feeling of fullness engulfing him little by little. The warmness in his stomach growing alongside the dizziness in his head.The music playing making it seem like time had stopped for just this moment, but time did go on and soon all the other members were heading to sleep; further immersing him in this atmosphere he had created. He placed the hand that wasn't holding a beer on his slightly rounded out stomach, the gas already begging to expand his midsection, and rubbed there gently. Just to feel if it was actually real or not, he didn't know through how many cans he had gone through but it was hard to keep track of what sensations were real and which ones he was imagining for self indulgence. 

He imagined Hoseok was here with him, helping him drink, help him grow. He imagined sitting on his lap and difference of size between them, and growing heavy with the liquid he was chugging down. Hoseok's dainty hands making feel even bigger. Hoseok's lithe frame making JUngkook feel massive, his thick thighs over his slim ones. Hoseok's breath on his ear, encouraging him to go on, hot breathes against his body only making him thirstier and eager to continue. The determined look on Hoseok's dark eyes when he helped him today, the memory of his hands being all over his body. Hoseok. He needed Hoseok. 

He stood up too quickly from his chair, the world swirling slightly around him. he didn't have time to check how many cans were actually left as he clumsily waddled towards his phone; partially because of the alcohol, but also because of the sting in his stomach from the gas stored inside it. He grabbed his phone and quickly sprinted towards his chair and sat on it with force; the slight noise it made sent shivers down Jungkook's spìne. Uncoordinatedly he dialed Hoseok's number, without any real awareness of what he was doing. 

"Jungkook?" A very tired but mostly confused voice answered on the other side.

"Hobi I-" A loud burp interrupted him mid sentence, he now realized he hadn't really opened his mouth since he began drinking.Without any shame he continued. "I-I need you Hobi."Another gurgling noise left his throat after the needy confesion. "Need you hands, here with-with me." His voice was shaky with desperation.

"Jungkook, are you drunk?" His voice was stern. 

"Please come?" A deep sigh was the only thing he said after a long minute of silence.

"I'm going, stay where you are." Waiting for him to arrive Jungkook looked down at himself, with his stomach ballooned his shirt had risen up and he had undone his pants to make more room, he didn't remember doing so in the first place.

"You came!" He exclaimed drowsy. 

"Kookie, what is going on?" He didn't sound as stern as he sounded on the phone. "Getting drunk on a weekday? Alone in your room? Is everything ok?" He slowly approached Jungkook's chair, ignoring completely the compromising position the maknae was in; slightly disappointing the younger by doing so. 

Even if drunk, Jungkook knew that confessing his feelings on this scenario wasn't ideal, not for him nor Hoseok. But, on the other hand , he didn't want to keep lying, specially when the older man was right in front of him demanding to know what was wrong. He had to say something. 

"I just...I keep looking for this feeling of being full and, and I never told anybody. But now you know and, I don't know...I'm scared, I don't know why I do this, I wanted you here." It doesn't really answer all of the dancer's questions, but it wasn't a lie either. And more importantly, it seemed to work on Hoseok. His face softened at the younger boy as he walked and sat at the end of his lap. 

"You didn't finish all of your beers." He mentioned eyeing the bag beside them.

"Want one?" Jungkook offered with a playful smile. 

"Well I suppose one beer won't hurt." That's a lie, especially coming from Hoseok, but he didn't argue against it. He took the beer and began drinking it quickly. "So, you said you were 'looking for this feeling'. What do you mean?" Hoseok made talking, even in the most uncomfortable situations, like it was nothing. 

"This. The feeling of being full. I don't know what it is about it...It makes me feel, safe? In a way, it's more like I put myself in position where I need to be taken care of. And it feels... amazing." It was weird finally saying all that stuff out loud, yet somewhat cathartic. 

“But…” Hoseok began tentatively, “Has there ever been someone, to take care of you?” The maknae blushed, even though the question didn’t imply anything; or that's what he tried to convince himself of. 

“Well, it has been more of a treat yourself thing.”He laughed pitiful. Warmth re appearing on his face as he remembered how desperate where his urges of Hoseok's care. “But I can imagine.” He stated carelessly, the effects of the alcohol finally affecting his common sense. 

“Oh yeah? What do you imagine?” It was getting hard to read what the older man’s tone meant. But he could see him leaning closer from the end of his lap, eyes intently watching the maknae with a glint of something Jungkook couldn’t describe. It was difficult to pay attention as his eyes closed, drowsy and wasted; Hoseok’s insinuating questions only made his long time fantasy more vivid. Before he could control himself he spoke. 

“You, mostly.” The statement should have been terrifying but he couldn't find it in himself to care at this point, so he continued. “Your pretty little hands all over me, you would take such good care of me, hyung. I can’t stop thinking about it, since today I’ve been wanting it for so long I-” Once the truth was out, Jungkook filled in the silence with only more exposing honesty, though his rambling was cut short by a tentative hand on his muscular thigh. His eye shot open wide. Ant there he was, dainty hand settled comfortably over his thick leg, the older man leaning forward with an expecting look in his eyes. A serious expression made Jungkook shiver, he looked so, demanding. It felt like he was asking for an explanation, and the maknae was about to give it to him, but he beat him to it when he said. 

“You didn’t finish your beers.” He stated simply. An innocent look as he leaned down to grab one from the bag next to the chair. He slid himself forward on Jungkook’s lap, now sitting mid thigh where his hand had once been. The maknae’s eyes widened if possible even more, as Hoseok opened the can and eyed him expectant for a complaint whilst bringing the can to the younger’s lips. Jungkook took it in an obedient began to drank as the older held the can delicately to his lips. Although his adorable demeanor, the maknae still found an authority in Hoseok; but rather than having to fear it Jungkook felt like he was at the dancer’s care, yet still feeling the need to please him as well. His eyes were glued to his drinking lips, so he took the chance to look at the older properly. 

Hoseok had his eyes half lidded and soft exhales where leaving his parted heart shaped lips. With both hands on the can to make sure nothing spilled, he was leaning slightly towards the bloated stomach; which was beginning to make itself noticeable to both men. Giving it a light pressure, not enough to get any as out, but enough to make him squirm. 

The time their conversation ahd taken hadn’t been enough to sober him up, and the extra beer sliding easily down his throat wasn’t helping either. It was becoming hard to process the situation for Jungkook. Of course he knew this wasn’t just a friendly and platonic encounter, but neither had it been the one in the bathroom earlier that day. It was hard to imagine what Hoseok felt for him, let alone this whole stuffing scenario; all the maknae had was his reactions to guide himself on. He had let all his intentions out there, but Hoseok hadn’t mentioned a word; which wasn’t a surprise for the younger. Attentive of others feelings but neglective and fearful of his, yes, that sounded like Jung Hoseok alright. Lost in thought he hadn’t even noticed he finished the can already, it wasn’t until the can was slipped out of his reach that he snapped out of his transe. 

“Just two more.” There it was again. That authoritative tone on Hoseok’s voice. Not stern but strong, motivating, addictive. Jungkook felt within him the strong urge to comply to whatever it was he asked; so when the older man brought yet another beer to his lips, it was impossible to refuse. Even with the growing discomfort on hi middle section. 

Still in doubt of Hoseok’s intentions behind this entire situation, Jungkook raised his hands from the arm rests of his chair; tentatively hovering over the older’s waist. He didn’t want to cross a line and for this to end, but this whole scenario already felt like a line was being crossed. With his mouth full, he tied eyeing at Hoseok looking for some sort of permission; but the dancer’s eyes were glued to his lips. Intently watching the younger drink, as to make sure if he wanted to stop or not. It didn’t take much for Jungkook to decide on gently settling his hands at either side of Hoseok’s waist; gently urging him closer.  The older man slides across his lap, until his slim stomach was pressing firmly against Jungkook’s firm dome. Soon enough the second large can was finished as well, and the maknae was truly feeling the expanse of his midsection pushing against the shirt he was using. It was uncomfortable. But he knew that the more he drank, the more time Hoseok would have to spend taking care of him; so in the end it didn't take much of him to eagerly begin to drink the last can left. 

This one he wanted to get over with, needed the older’s hands on him somehow. He reckoned Hoseok knew that already, yet he pretended to be concentrated on the can on his lips instead of the bulging firmes growing on his stomach. He gulped aggressively as an attempt to finish it as fast as possible, horrible idea. HAfter slightly choking on beed, he was actually grateful Hoseok’s entire attention was settled on him drinking.  

“You are doing great.” He reassured taking the can away from his mouth, his voice sounded gentle and less authoritative than when he first commanded him to drink. “You only have half a can left, you can do that right?” A teasing and challenging mansour taking over the last question, as if darin Jungkook playfully. This made it clear that Hoseok indeed knew what Jungkook was eager for, but wasn’t willing to give to him until the last beer was finished. The maknae hummed determined and the can was once again brought up to him. Patiently he worked his way through the gazzy liquid. He could feel his face scrunching up from the discomfort in his abdomen, the strains of pain making it hard to continue drinking. He found distraction in his hands around Hoseok’s middle, stroking gently; feeling the skin through the fabric, slightly tightening his grip when feeling especially filled. It seemed like forever, but it was finally finished. 

“Amazing.” Hoseok’s voice was quiet and tender. His face inches close of his own; Jungkook wondered if his deep exhales of air smelled like beer, but it didn’t seem to bother the older man. “You did amazing, Kookie.” Their noses were grazing each other with the slightest of touches, and so were their lips. Jungkook froze, petrified by the others bold actions. With a gentle smile, he brought their lips together. Softly the older man began to move his lips.

The maknae was on a spiral, the alcohol only enhancing his feelings for Hoseok and all of the sensations he was feeling. The gas in his stomach, gurgling and roarin within him, the tingling sensation on his lips moving in sync, Hoseok’s thin fingers sliding form his jaw to his neck to his chest to finally settling on the top of his ballooned stomach, pressing lightly against it. Jungkook’s jaw dropped at the sensation, deepening the kiss. On the hardened dome, Hoseok’s hands began to massage strongly; the sensation so pleasing the maknae was opening his mouth again to let out a moan. He wished he’d take that action back, but it was too late. 

A clear burp erupted from his parted lips almost as soon as he had chosen to open his mouth. 

“Hobi! I’m, shit I’m really sorry, all the beer it just-” He began explaining,m petrified by his own actions. Somehow, he had forgotten what stuffing himself usually lead to. Though his ranting was interrupted by yet another burp escaping past his lips. He stayed there petrified, the ashamed warmth taking over his entire body. A quiet giggle erupted from the older man.

“It’s okay, Kookie.” He spoke reassuringly with a tender tone and even softer voice, their faces still centimeters apart. “Just let it all out, I’ll help you” Although it has started with an authoritative Hoseok, this was one Jungkook war most accustomed to: the Hoseok who helped and cared for everybody; even through embarrassing situations. But, how could he be sure he was just doing it for pity of a wasted maknae and not because he actually felt the same way?

His worries were soon vanished, as the dancer continued not only to rub firm circles on the top of his stomach but continued kissing the younger man. He parted their lips and began nibbling softly on his jaw; Jungkook’s hands on the other’s waist tightened at the sensation. Hoseok’s hands over his stomach felt like magic, dainty but strong; he could feel them moving the gas around him. As a result of his miraculous kneading, a string of various burps came out of the maknaes mout like it was nothing. Sure enough, it felt humiliating, but the older’s encouragement was getting him through it. 

“Yes, keep going.” He mumbled lips pressed to his neck. 

“You are doing amazing.”

“Let them out, just like that”

He mewled at the praise, only for it to blended with another burp. Hoseok’s hands had began to travel along the expanse of taut skin. Groping the sides with force; Jungkook’s jaw fell open, his face scrunching up for pleasure. Earning a burp as its consequence. He could feel himself deflating form the gas leaving his body, thought there was still much to go, and Hoseok was determined to get it out. The older man kept on roaming as much as they could, finally doing so underneath Jungkook’s shirt. The dainty hands settled at the bottom of his stomach, pressing slightly. His automatic response came from his hips, pushing forward against Hoseok’s. It was only then he noticed how aroused this situation was making him. He was hard. The older man had shown his awareness, answering through groping of the lower half of his hardened dome. His burps were become softer and quieter, and it seemed like the could finally begin to focus on the maknae’s other issue. 

Jungkook thought about it for a minute, his long term feelings for Hoseok; is this how he wanted it to happen? Drunk, without a clue if this were going to happen again or not? Suddenly, the smooth movement of the hips from the man on top of him seemed unappealing. 

“Wait!” He exclaimed shyly. The dancer stopping entirely, surprised; his attention completely on Jungkook.  “This is not how I want it to happen.” He stated. “I-I’m sorry if I lead you on, but-”

“Hey, we don’t have to do anything.” He reassured with a smile. “How about this, we go to sleep and we can talk it out tomorrow.”

“That does sound nice.” He confirmed drowsy. 

---

Jungkook rose the next day by the excruciatingly loud alarm on his phone. 6:30 am. Right. Work. The memories of last night were blurry, and all his mind could care about at the moment was to finish preparing for the long day ahead of him; whatever it was that they were doing, he couldn’t recall. HOwever the memory of him and Hoseok having to talk made a spark of an indescribable excitement rise in his stomach. Wait no, that’s the hangover.

[cold-arrow]

Doctor's notes, Entry 40, part 1 Book 2 of the Goldenfields group

Summary, things of note since last entry LA place, kids, Lyms hideout/contact in the "slums" , the abandoned district of Mirrorbar, company responsible for buying all the land. The Universal Brotherhood. those assholes are responsible. Mildthru, contact of Lym's brother, Lehel. Her. Omricks curse Equipment from mister Remur. meeting up with our guide Merlus Darkhelm | We spent some time discussing on what to do while we were waiting on Mr. Remur to help us with our supplies. in the meantime we enjoyed some drinks that were provided at behest of the LA. while nurturing our drinks, we were a bit torn on what to do as per usual. Im not sure if its hesitance in regards to leaving the convinces of this safe haven and to risk another assassination attempt. Or if we just arent that decisive for our own various reasons. Eventually we decided to give up on notion of visiting a magic shop (for now) as well as the Blacksmith. Instead began our search of A tavern Lym was looking for.  we asked directions from a few kids and lost a few gold pieces, (and some patience in the process) but we were eventually pointed towards the general location and direction of the tavern.  Towards the so called "abandoned" district or "slums." an area of the city that was described as “decrepit”  Looked down upon for some reason. But as we arrived at that section of the city, it... kind of just looked normal. empty, but normal. nothing high class or fancy, but definitely not the decrepit ugly slums that the area was painted to be.  It turns out that a company has been being up land and houses in the district, and ruined its reputation. causing people to move away from the area, and to look down upon those living there. I think one of the others mentioned that a company or group by the name of the "Universal Brotherhood." was responsible?  When we return here and have some free time, we perhaps should indeed look into the matter. we eventually found the tavern Lym was looking for, Mireditch tavern. It actually seems kinda cozy. small, but nice. The place is run by an elven women by the name of Mildthru. she is a friend of Leh it seems, Lym's brother, and was kind enough to provide us with shelter for the night. she seems to know Lehel pretty well appearently, which certainly is intersting, and was able to tell us a bit more about him. it sounds like he's a pretty decent young man from the way both Mildthru and Lym describe him. so im becoming pretty curious to meet him |

("the next part is written once more in shaky handwriting, and is somewhat hard to read")

 I-I-It's her. she's here. she almost killed me. she s-s-saw an oppertunity and took it. Baras was able to drive her back. b-b-but almost died as well. she hurt them. I think lym got hurt. Omrick got effected by something. I dont know whats wrong with him. its seems connected but it also doesnt. it doesnt make sense. we should go. we shouldnt stay here much longer. Mildthru almost got hurt. I feel guilty and I’m sorry and it's my fault, I am a nuisance. its my fault we disturbed and troubled her. after she was kind enough to provide a... a safe space |

Omrick seemed to be frantic about something and couldnt calm down. seemed to be in pain, or something was causing pain. Or somethign was happening mentally. nothing was working though. and   he was... fighting gho something we couldnt see. kept thinking people were   erm.... were     being possessed. I dont think that actually was the case. Really hope thats not the case. not again. Tried a few things but nothing was really effective. he seems cursed or something. I dont know Baras and lym managed to find the source    of sorts. something about his eyes or aura. they managed to dispel whatever he was seeing for now. but almost as  worrysome as    (seing real illusions?) ( i dont understand. dont know how to figure out. i need sleep. we need rest. maybe Baras is better suited at helping him. Atlesat I think its hi) I couldnt look Mildthru in the eyes the next morning, i felt too guilty. And I kinda wanted to leave as soon as possible. We met up with mr. Remur and he was able to provide most our equipment. and more. not all the extra items like spell components, but still a decent amount of them. we divided the stuff amongs ourselves and set out shortly afterwards. along    with our guide Merlus Darkhelm. a peculiar and strange dwarven man. he seems to be overly interested in me. I am not sure if...     i can trust him. he has a lot of equipment with him. and dont know what all the stuff is that he's carrying or what he needs all of that for, but... i dont know. Nor do I even know how he's able to carry all of it 

[vertigoambrosia]

shotgun is xxtra big so maybe it will help me deal with my woes

...it’s not actually that much longer than a usual one who probably not

awww does old man andy have somethign wrong with his back??

WHEN I TURN 30 SOMEDAY lmaoooo

hahahahaha owned

and for the first time in a while, cmj was happy :D

i’m sad emil is still face because frankfurt had some real great hate for him

pretty sure they did the insulting acrostic signs

god i am so glad these guys are still friends

ilja: if i’m to be a good parent i need a bit of chill!

god they’re so cute

look at ilja and robert smiling at each other

cerberus: hugs not drugs but the hugs are suplexes

uh sorry ‘doug williams might retire’ is not actually that compelling for me

IT’S YAY-HIGH

fucking british people mispronouncing shit

yaaaaay maggot is back!

i love how a dude named fucking maggot is part of a prettyboi gimmick team

‘the son of nothing’ is not someone you expect to be obsessed wuth how hot he is

and then here’s rise

omgggg lucky hugging ivan

ivan’s the token average looking person in this match

why do british people say ‘nip up’ instead of ‘kip up’

haha ahura’s lil run

god i hope we get plot segments with pretty bastards

especiallt with rise cause you know pete would easily get riled up by them being annoying

*alan voice*i’m not judging....but most wrestlers choose to wear shoes

what are ivan kiev’s legs

tee hee pete was probably not supposed to fall there

where are the pretty bastards from? crowd definitely seems real into them

ivan you silly boi that was an obvious distraction! youre supposed to be the level headed one

oh i guess this is xxl show because of the amount of matches

this segment just started and it’s already amazing

‘hello human’

*kris wolf voice* i am here to eat sausages and also people! i am hungry!

awww and christian was having such a good day too....

omg melanie’s a suit wearing heel now

jazzy has a point though cmj shouldn’t have allowed mella to just be in the match

that’s an interesting lil plot tidbit though; it makes more sense for melanie to be pissed that she had a lot of the vision for the womens division that hasn’t been acknowledged than the whole ~she jealous`~ stuff

of course, she’s still in the wrong because she does shit like fucking up martina right before the title match

but she’s a heel so that’s how it should be

awwwwww that is actually really super cute of them to do that lil thing for toni

oooo another mystery envelope????

our boys!

hahaha look at these wrestling nerds

tim is so cute

he says progress the british way

he calls everyone sir

tbh i totally forgot cck were in tag league

is this the second or third time lykos has been booked for a wxw show and then had to drop out due to injury?

i would like to thank every wxw fan who flips off heels right to their faces

HAHAHA THAT CHANT

‘breaking news’ ok that doesn’t really work on commentary...there’s definitely a btter way to have conveyed that plot point

though i already saw the annoucement on twitter before i started watching so perhaps i’m just nitpicking

ngl i am not really paying attention

me: i love grapplefuck

me also: this british catch wrestler bores me

huh, interesting that marius won clean

(yeah i really was not paying attention)

omg i had the fan theme stuck in my head for like a day straight it was terrible

ugh tarkan

yeah i bet you like his look, tarkan

lmao tarkan can’t stop talking about himself is he on coke or something

tarkan is such an emotional sadist why does he want to break lucky more

tweeter promo i guess

i mean it wasn’t really bullshit both of you just didn’t get up

i read what this stip is and i’m eager to see how it comes up

also an emotional sadist: jurn

i love how fucking serious fair vs hair is

you will be balded and shamed for life

or at least i guess until your hair grows back

yay tag league still has the music i like

aww poor rise in the warm up

oh man will lucky finally become shotgun champ???

i bet tarkan will interfere though

oh good ringkampf is getting okami

WAIT NO JEFF COBB AND TIM AREN’T GOING TO BE IN THE SAME BLOCK

someone please put these dudes in another singles match

but like, here or progress where they can actually have fun

jay fk would be the worst bodyguards

i was gonna say i guess juvenile x and koray arent a thing anymore but this was all in frankfurt and i’ms ure they weren’t on the progress tour

i love how avalanche goes into crazy mode when ilja is around

a lil sad they didn’t do the cerberus thing, but they are different boys now i guess

ugh i want a front row seat in wxw

unfortunately i’m not even sure if i can go to carat next year -- i don’t quite have the money to spare to buy the hotel/plane tickets and i think all the hotels might be sold out

i remember when i checked a few months ago the tryp was the only one of the three that had rooms and that has probably changed now

also you have to pay for tryp’s wifi if you use over like, 500MB and also apparently it’s slow

which i suppose is less of a problem when id’ only be staying for a few days, but still - wifi is important when you’re traveling

omgggg jay

none of these men will have mercy on you

lmao i typed almost all of that and only now has the match actually started

also i missed a lot of the pre-match brawling did francis die

did andy leave?

aaaa they did the thing!

<3

oh andy deigns to return to the match

these charlatans! triple teaming avalanche!

oooooo andy julian’s getting riles too

you in danger

i will never get tired of that spot where someone jumps at avalanche and just bounces off

jay doing the loser sign with the wrong hand

oh my god ilja a suicide dive might have been less risky than what you were planning

ah i see he was just waiting to use that for later

ooo that looked like julian’s head hiot the ropes

oh nvm he’s back up

yaaaay former dogboys

baby! baby boy

awww lucky

yeah pete and ivan are 100% his parents now

???? baby has something to say???

oh damn we’ve never seen lucky yell like that before!

oh fuck off tarkan

fuck you and your brass knuckles and your goddamn girdle

we are not your friends!

lucky bb let your parents at least be at ringside so these jerks can’t jump you

tarkan is so fucking cold

[thebrokengodofmischief]

We’re All Leaving

The moment he felt death close around him, Loki felt this peace. He knew deep down in his heart he would never reach Valhalla; his life stained by his many mistakes and misdeeds. Yet if he could chose a path for himself -- to live in the golden halls for all eternity or remain weightless in this never ending silence. He would chose the latter. 

It wasn’t dark, nor light. It was just peace. He was happy, for this gentle calm was more than he knew he deserved.

Yet suddenly it was bright and everything around him was harsh. A loud scream from an all to familiar voice was waking him from this slumber and he felt fear along with grief, anger and anxiousness. The familiar taste of revenge filled him and he could feel his sight returning to him.

Everything was grey, like he was witnessing everything on an old reel of film. Thor in front of him, panting and gasping for breath as he stood in a ship surrounded by an odd band of people. 

“Who the hell are you guys..?” The Thunderer panted out. Loki was only grateful the healing spell he had placed on his brother when he tackled him to the ground was working. It kept him alive long enough while help came.

They tended to him and as Loki leaned against the wall watching him from a far he began to understand what he was. Why he was still here and why no one else seemed to notice him standing there.

He was a ghost, his astral form stuck between worlds. Not truly gone but unable to remain in the physical world anymore. It struck his heart and his whole body tense with the thought of it. Perhaps this was his curse, a curse for his wickedness. The bill coming due and the Fates deciding he would never get that peace. Loki was a fool to thing he would be worthy of anything akin to it, even for that brief moment. His soul was tethered to Thor’s and he knew his brother would never let him go.

For as much as he tried to speak, his screams fell on deaf ears. For as much as he tried to grab at his brother, shake him and tell him he was still here his hands would pass through the thunderer and Thor would continue on his talk about the infinity stones.

---

Crossing his arms, Loki sat next to Thor in the pod. “I wish you could hear me brother.. Please.. Just--” He bowed his head and turned away. Guilt flooded him.

Why couldn’t Thor let him go? He wasn’t deserving of this grief, of this unbreakable bond his brother held over him. 

“So dead brother huh? Yeah, that could be annoying.” The raccoon spoke, though Loki had smiled at Thor’s calling of ‘rabbit’ to the creature. 

“Well, he’s been dead before. Now this time, I think it really might be true.”

“And you said your sister and your dad…”

“Both dead.”

“But still got a mom, though?”

“Killed by a Dark Elf.”

“A best friend?”

“Stabbed through the heart.”

“You sure you’re up to this particular mono mission?

“Absolutely! The rage and vengeance, anger, loss, regret, they’re all tremendous motivators. They really clear the mind, so I’m good to go.”

“Yeah, but this Thanos we’re talking about, he’s the toughest there is.”

“Well, he’s never fought me.”

“Yeah, he has.

“He’s never fought me twice. I’m getting a new hammer, don’t forget.”

“Well, it better be some hammer.” Rocket seemed to be loosing this argument but Thor began to turn serious, his optimism failing for a moment and Loki could see it; it made him ache somethign fierce.

“You know, I’m fifteen hundred years old. I’ve killed twice as many enemies as that, and every one of them would’ve rather killed me, but none succeeded. I’m only alive because fate wants me alive. Thanos is just the latest in a long line of bastards, and he will be the latest to feel my vengeance. Fate wills it so.” A few tears fell from Thor’s eyes before he could catch them.

“Mm-hmm. And what if you’re wrong?”

“Well, if I’m wrong, then what more could I lose?”

---

“All Fathers, give me strength.”

“Do you understand, boy? You’re about to take the full force of a star. It’ll kill you!” Eitri pressed.

“Only if I die.”

“Yes, that’s what killing you means.”

“Thor! Stop!” Loki tried to smack his brother, tried to make him see him. This was suicide and he wouldn’t let his brother die! He couldn’t, not after all he had done to keep him safe. “This is madness! Please! Listen to me! Hear me, I’m here! You don’t have to do this! Please!” His voice hoarse from screaming as Thor gripped the leavers and opened Nidavellir.

Screaming with the last of his might Loki pressed himself between Thor and the stars raw heat and power. Any ounce of magic within his veins shielding Thor from the vast majority of the blast but it wasn’t enough. As Thor lost strength, so did he and he felt darkness close around him once more.

The endless silence pulling him back.

---

A loud snap woke him once more and he found himself laying in the ground. A canopy of trees above him as he tried to remember his last moment with his brother. Nidavellir.. Storm Breaker.. The star..

Pushing himself onto his feet he saw colour once again, everything bright and beautiful as it came into focus. Yet it didn’t last.

Stepping close he looked out on the field to see half of the warriors fading into dust. 

He felt winded, eyes unable to look away as he heard people scream and cry over those who were just.. Gone. There was nothing to bury, nothing to say goodbye to. 

Thanos had won. 

This was his fault. Part of him wanted to argue, but how could he? The moment he had let go from the broken bifrost bridge his road was leading him to this. If he hadn’t let go, if he hadn’t seen the tesseract on his way down to Sanctuary, maybe it would not have ignited the titan so to fulfill his mission of balance.

“Loki..” A soft voice reached his ears yet it was as if it was spoken across worlds. Slowly turning he saw Thor standing there, covered in the dirt, grime and blood of battle. Storm Breaker at his side. Tears fill his eyes, seeing his brother standing there; at the end of all things. Skin blue, in his true Jotun form. Darker blue and purple bruises around his neck and dried blood trailed off from his mouth and nose. Thor rushed to him,  trying to embrace his brother but his arms fell through the trickster and Loki stumbled back; thrown out of his shock.

“You.. You can see me?” His voice like an echo now that it could be heard, distant and sad.

Thor nodded. Still in disbelief and trying to understand.

“I’m not here Thor.. Not really. It’s like.. I’m stuck.” Loki swallowed, bowing his head and looking down in shame. “I feel tied to you, when you wake so do I. Yet when you’re gone I find myself in this empty space. Quiet and calm. It’s hard to explain.. I’ve been trying to call to you, to make you see me since you woke on that rescue ship but..” I wasn’t strong enough. “Nidavellir, trying to shield you, I must have taken in some of her energy and now..”

I’m still not here nor there. But you can see me.

“We lost.. Didn’t we..” Loki finally looked up to his brother.

“Yes..” Thor’s voice cracked, fingers shaking. “It was my fault.”

“No..” Loki tried to placate him, concentrating his magic so his touch would be more grounded just like his manifestation was becoming; his fingers wrapping around the nape of Thor’s neck and the thunderer shivered. “This all comes back to me.. What I’ve done.. Because I let go..” Pausing he pulled his brother close, able to embrace him now and grant him some peace. “I’m here still.. Some part of me is still here and the fight isn’t over! This is just a passing thing, a shadow that we must bring to the light. We could spend the rest of eternity blaming one another or ourselves but it would only keep us in the dark.”

---

Days turned into weeks, weeks to months and months to years. Loki stayed by Thor’s side. A manifestation of energy as he did what he could to help what remained of the Avengers so they might take back what Thanos had stolen from them.

All the while Loki could feel himself getting weaker and weaker. The universe didn’t want him here anymore, his soul was meant to pass and he was supposed to end. That he was still standing here was an affront to nature and the true order of things. Loki wanted to tell his brother, to make him let him go but the happiness in Thor’s smile kept him from doing so. He had gotten his brother back in some form and it made it harder for him to pull away. 

Standing just outside on the balcony, looking out at the stars of Wakanda he heard the Avengers converse behind him. Tomorrow they would begin their years worth of preparing and planing.

“This plan.. It might alter things, change the past and then into the future..” Loki stated, knowing Thor had come out to his side without him even looking beside him. “But for the course of my life, I don’t think my ending will change..” Sighing he finally looked over to his brother who looked like he had just been slapped.

Thor only pressed his lips together in a thin line, “Don’t say that.. We’re going to save everyone, even you! Trust me brother this will work.”

“I’m tired Thor, I feel pieces of me slipping away; memories and sensations but as much as I try to reach for them I get tugged back. By you. My life was supposed to end! I was supposed to--” Loki began to growl, turning to his brother and wondering how he could keep looking at him for all these years when he still looked like he had just died. “But you just can’t let me go!”

With that he pulled himself back into the empty; finding a way to control it so he could have his own space and a small measure of peace. Guilt flooding him at the look on Thor’s face when he disappeared.

---

The morning of, the sun began to rise as it always did. Loki stood in Thor’s room, watching the golden rays catch his brothers face and he let out a small sigh. Sitting down on the edge of the bed. “Thor..” His voice was quiet but it was enough to rouse the thunder god. Sitting up he looked at his brother. “I need you to listen.. Because what I am about to say will be hard to hear.”

Thor nodded, seeming to know what was coming after Loki’s outburst last night; thinking it was an apology that he didn’t deserve but he wasn’t expecting the next words that Loki spoke.

“I can’t stay.. Not like this, you should let me go. It’s not right to hold on like this brother..” Loki tried to be gentle. After all Thor had lost, this one small glimmer of his brother meant so much to him. Loki finally understood and it was when he was saying goodbye.

“Why are you leaving..?” Thor asked, voice weak, trying not to cry at Loki’s request.

“It's like I'm reading a book.. And it's a book I deeply love. But I'm reading it slowly now. So the words are really far apart and the spaces between the words are almost infinite. I can still feel you.. And the words of our story.. But it's in this endless space between the words that I'm finding myself now. It's a place that's not of the physical world. It's where everything else is that I didn't even know existed..

“I love you so much.. But this is where I am now, and this is who I am now.” He pauses, looking away as the words catch in his throat. “And I need you to let me go. As much as I want to, I can’t live in your book anymore..”

“Where are you going?” Thor’s voice cracked and Loki could tell he would never be ready for this goodbye.

“It would be hard to explain, but if you ever get there, come find me. Nothing would ever pull us apart.”

“I love you too brother.. Please.. Promise you’ll be waiting for me.” Thor began to cry and Loki could feel himself beginning to fade. Looking down at his hands he saw how he was disintegrating into flecks of golden light. A warmth filling him like he had never known.

“I promise..”

Then he was gone. Not to Valhalla, not to the empty but to a new world all his own.

[what-ever-happened-to-chip]

Marcus/Lana story I wrote, takes place after Gray had his freak out in the kitchen in the last story.

Marcus didn't release my hand the entire walk to his bedroom. He pushed the door lightly shut and dug in his deep pockets for his cigarettes. Marcus' hands were soft from lack of doing just about anything with them and his bulged knuckles locked safely between mine. Although he always loved to talk, it seemed like now he didn't just want to, he needed to. "Heyaa...you alright?" Gotta start somewhere Lana. "Yes would be a vague statement on the matter, but yes I am ultimately okay." He exhaled the thick Pall Mall smoke. He gave me a reassuring smile. "Any incidence like the such can shake someone, we are all made to preserve our mind and body and to see both at jeopardy leads essentially back to our own selfish motives of survival. A crass reminder, but a neccesary one." "Yeah I guess I'm sorta used to it being in camp by now. I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing." "Would you excuse me for just one moment, dear." He gently placed my hand on my own knee. As he swiftly exited the room, I could feel the warmth leave my hand. My eyes gazed around his room. He was neatish, but very cluttered. Spread across his desk was piles of notebooks and books, notecards with his immaculate penmanship jotting ideas, overflowing ashtrays 90% pall mall filters. His closet was packed to the brim with blazers, cardigans, many dulled colors of the rainbow mismatched together. He loved clothes and took the pride to dress up in his own unique fashion everyday. These thoughts made me love him more. 'THIS IS BOOOORING, she's just sitting there, let's follow Marcus and see what he's doing until she gets back." "Perhaps he is only using the faciluties." I was gonna show him wrong, check and mate, camera engaged to Marcus, and bam, harry was right. Marcus at a reasonable fast pace, hands in pocket, walked down the stairs and turned the corner on to the third door on the right. He gently knocked and called out, "Denny, would this be a bad time to inquire for your time?" "Uh shit, hold on.." "Oh my god Aiden don't, he'll see" "Babe, it's cool, chill..." "whisper whisper....whisper" The door swung open. Jenn was rearranging loose strands of hair while trying to hold the comforter over her exposed bra. She was always jealous to give up alone time with Aiden, but Marcus was his friend and he needed a best friend, especially a cool one like Marcus. "Whatchu need homes?" "Would you be able to spare a gram for the night, a sharp too? I have been outta stock at the present time. "Yeah fer sure, if Joni hasn't fucking washed me out. For a bitch that can get free drugs whenever she wants, she seems to never have any of her own shit. Gray has ghosted the bitch so she's crawling around my shit these days." In a little flower shaped box, Jenn had lovingly gave all Aiden's "shit" a proper place to live in the bedroom. No twice used needles in her perfect little world. Marcus laughed in his head at the concept of a girlfriend being more worried about the physical mess of addiction rather than the cause it had on the boyfriend in case. However, the only annoyance drugs had in Jenn's life was it meant Aiden would talk to his friends more. Aiden held out the box like a bowl of candy and Marcus proceeded to pick out a 1/2 inch rock and assorted tools for the activity. "Thank you good friend, we'll converse tomorrow. Goodnight, Jenavieve." Most of Aiden's friend didn't bother acknowledge Jenn, it felt good that Marcus always at least gave her a greeting or a goodbye, sometimes both. They hugged each other tightly, for almost a full minute. Aiden rested his head on Marcus's shoulder like a toddler. Marcus closed his eyes and held a soft smile. Harry was bored. Thank god he was finally leaving. Oh fuck. "Ayyye ya Marcus, how ya doin?" Harry boringly sat through another 20 minute conversation him and Gippal had about dead romantic languages. This was so stupid, he never thought he hated Gippal until this moment. "Of course, to interpret any eastern religions, namingly Hinduism, Buddhism would never be the proper message without rudimentary knowledge of traditional Sanskrit, we could only roughly use Hindi to roughly define it, but well, jo hai no hai." They both let out pretentious laughs. "Well yeah, but couldn't ya say that about dead greek, latin, and all the like? Lots of those Christian fanatics like to use Latin instead of language, makes it deeper er something like that." he leaned back and clicked his tongue for no apparant reason. "Well fanatic indeed is the key word their, seemingly Christianity's domination of the whole western world led to Latin's prevelance yet today, however Sanskrit is actually still spoken as a live changeble language. The difference between a dead language lies not in the fact their are speakers still, but rather the ability to alter and update language to our modern needs." "I guessum, but maybe the inflexibility makes the language more understandable, certainly easier to learn, hell, sed quid scio?" "Clearly you know a great deal, my friend." This was so gay. Harry couldn't give a fuck about language or latin or anyone of it. He knew some Latin cause of his spells, but he didn't need to speak it. Just speak English, i'm sick of having to put on the translators just to get a joke. Oh thank god they are finishing up. Finally. "Indeed somethign to think about. Very well, Satyricon amicus~" "Oib, oib. facile accipere pitto" "I detect by your accent shift that was Al Bhed?" "oui kud ed syh, hmmm, lmajan" "That's just it, written Al Bhed is an easy cryptograph, so I am more or less fluent there, but spoken I have not quite grasped the dialect." "You got it man, just like any other, you gots to talk with it. Yer good at talkin so it shouldn't be no problemo" "Indeed so, I only find it would be fair to speak Lana, and your, natural language, makes for better conversation to speak the way another thinks." "How's that girlie doin' these days?" "Oh quite well, but to know for sure i'd better get back to her company" "Do yer thang man, I gotta work on some....." he began muttering whatever bullshit to himself and pacing away. Fucking finally he proceeded back to where Harry wanted him. That was super annoying.

The slouched Lana perked up at the sight of him returning. She'd paced the room and looked through his writings, he didn't ever have a concern for privacy and if he did he would never  tell her, he would merely just keep it a secret. She was used to being patient when it came to Marcus. He wasn't neccesarily easily distracted, but easily engaged in whatever was around him. She hated herself for being disappointed that he brought back H. "I'm sorry I kept you so long darling, as we rest society continues to thrive." He used many pet names with people, however darling he seemed to save for more special situations. She felt more relieved. It was cute seeing them together, but Harry wanted more. He needed more. "Fuck this i'm drugging her to ask him questions, i hate waiting for the bitch to do something. " "Indeed so Harry Potter." As much as Harry loved the sound of his own name, it was starting to bother him the way Christian kept saying it, like he was mocking him. Harry opened a secret cabinet to the left of the monitors and began scanning around for the proper potion to guide the situation into what he wanted. "Mmmmmm I think I'll use a dash of love, a bit of truth....." He busily mixed away. Christian sat completely still, but scanned the room thouroughly with his eyes. "That's the magic touch! Okay this should make her start asking him things that might make things funner..mwah haha...." "More fun." "Excuse moi?" "Funner is not a proper word. The expression would be 'more fun'" This guy was really getting on his fucking nerves. Ugh. He placed the potion in the vaporizer, isolated to only work on Lana and pumped it through the vents of Marcus's room. Immediatly the effects engaged. Lana uncontrolablly began to talk before comprehending fully what she had thought. "I thought you weren't using lately?" Oh god she sounded like a bitchy controlling girlfriend, but she really was just curious. Who was she kidding she was bothered and she didn't know why. He never got annoyingly high, he always coasted at a light level, stayed attentive and active in the conversation. Since the day she met him he was a drug user so why now would she want it to change? She truly hated being 'this girl.' Dammit. Why did she say that? "Of course I wasn't lately, but a break would not be a break if one did not return would it, just simply the way things were." He smiled warmly again and excused himself to the bathroom. He knew she didn't like watching him do it, so it was considerate of him, but a pang of loneliness ran over her. Moments later he returned a wave of contentment ran over him, yet she still wanted to talk. "So are you using because you got by upset by before?" Fuck Lana, why do you keep saying these things? Stupid, stupid. "Perhaps there is a connection there, of course, any sitution like that not only is alarmingly in it's own right, it's probably the past associations I share like any human does. Familiar negative stimuli. And well comfort is occasionally do." He went silent and pondered on the wall for a moment. He beginning scurrying around behind his worn out recliner he spent the better part of his time in when he was alone. He pulled out a wooden guitar and begin picking random chords. "Sure, it just seemed you....whatever. I don't know what I'm saying." "Lana dear, are you feeling well? You seem to be rather confused in your sentiments. I mean that in no way condescending, really are you alright?" "Yeah I just wanna know you're okay I guess, not hiding." "I am well, however certain thoughts have the tendency to make one over think so i'd rather level my brain out and find a way to express it more productively." "I guess, but....." She wanted to be careful to not say anything else stupid, but all her thoughts felt like diarrhea spewing out of her mouth. She didn't even mean all the thigns she said, they were just stupid insecurities that passed though, they weren't her. Were they? Dammit, dammit.

"Lana i'd like to show you a song I had written a long time ago, one that reminds myself of this feeling."

Song

Harry was on the edge of his seat. He fucking loved when kareoke/watching people came together so neatly. He could feel his jeans get tight. Lana watched him intently, trying to catch every word, tears welled in her eyes and she couldn't help but to fall even deeper. Fuck why does he do this to my head. "Wow that was......beautiful. I wish I was better  with words. That was...." As she rose from the bed, he moved the guitar aside to make a seat for her on his lap. they sat in silence for a moment as he rocked the chair back and forth to lull them. "Perhaps times where words are at a loss is when music is essential. Of course, I could say something, but well I figure it gets the point across." "hey Marcus, i was just wondering.....what are we?" His eyebrow raised in genuine confusion and turned her on his lap to be face to face. "What are we you ask....as in the title given to the intimacy we share? We've been over this dear, I've never needed the security of labels to define what I share with the ones in my life." "I mean yeah. I know.......but Liza wasn't she your girlfriend, what made her different. I mean I get it if you felt a different way....but I guess after all this time, I don't know. I'm being stupid." "Stupid? No never, what possibly gives you that idea? Oh Liza.....yes my 'girlfriend' Liza, a term she demanded be told to all our companions to solidify her insecurity with the situation. I honestly felt that it made no difference  other than the way other's view a connection, but the power of word does hold a weight in our lives. Language is a strong tool, but not the only one, of course. Could you elaborate what it is you desire from this?" Lana's cheeks flushed. Jesus is this how Memo felt every time she talked to a boy? This is horrible, no wonder she doesn't like dating. "I guess it's not always I need to know, just sometimes you seem you forget about me. Like your devotion... wow that's a gay word....comes and goes." She felt even stupider now, why couldn't she stop talking? It was like diarrhea coming out of her mouth. Fat chance he's gonna like me the same after this. I'm just the same insecure girl he's met 100 times. "Lana I wish you would tell me your first reaction rather than the contrived one you think I wanted to hear. This isn't like you." His eyebrows began to tighten into a concerned look. "Talk seems like it might only make you feel more minimilized, here let me play your song again. It seems our memories don't always stay constant in this camp. I know I had a memory of playing it, but it's as if someone erased it from our minds to try and relive the experience." He briefly glanced directly into the camera. Fuck he was on to Harry. How did he know that he purposely erased it so Marcus could sing it again like the first time? Whatever, it was working exactly how Harry wanted. Bingo.

Next Song

Two songs in my watching. Harry was rock hard. This was good so good. "Damn that was so CUHH YOOOT! You know they're your fav couple now too J, just admit it." "J?" "I didn't say that, why would I be thinking about J? He's actually gotten pretty boring and annoying, i say Jay like the name, it's a nickname we used at hogwarts to mean friend." "You do not need to lie to me Harry Potter, the results are futile." Lana pulled Marcus's hand and led him to the queen bed in the middle of the room. The slowly began removing clothing and kissing softly. They proceeded to make love, not fuck, for many hours. Harry got shy and turned the camera off.

"Do you fear intimacy Harry Potter?"

"noooo I just think it gets boring when people just screw forever and don't talk about things. On that note Harry pulled his robe around his body and scurried away to the restroom.

Christian remained in his seat. Smiling.

[clocks-rising]

spotlight musings

First thing I did while doing the AH spotlight was turn off triples in the search. Triples almost always look good, and they’re very tempting, but since I didn’t want to price police (ie. I don’t go around comparing prices, maybe there’s something similar out there for cheaper or whatever but that’s not my business) and since a lot of them tend to be pretty common (triple pearls anyone?) I figured I’d try to look for something slightly more uncommon than triples.

Even with no triples there are color ranges or gene combos that repeat themselves over and over. Part of this is just due to how the color wheel works - there are some weird color placements, but you can get a cool purple dragon, or a cool red dragon, or a cool blue dragon just by breeding within a general color range as to something specific. 

Part of it is just very popular gene+color combos. Of course, even the very popular ones started somewhere - someone made a pair, gened it up when the genes came out, etc. Some of these are now very common today but perhaps for good reason - they’re pretty!

So when doing an AH spotlight I try to make sure not to make it too repetitive, but of course I have my own personal preferences so those sneak in anyway (male spirals anyone?). And at the end of the day, something being common doesn’t make it bad. There are thousands of players, and what’s wrong with everyone having a few pastels, or a few bloody red dragons, or whatever?

And there are common color/gene combos that are still bloody expensive. And to be honest, that’s fine. Here’s the thing - I love coatls. If I want to make a breeding pair, it’s probably coatls. If I can’t find a coatl (or wildclaw, as much as I dislike them, at least they also produce coatls) then that costs me 2k gems to turn somethign into a coatl. If someone has a coatl that has the colors I need or whatever, then even 250g or 300g or 500g or whatever saves on that cost. So if you see a fancy new gene/color combo and it feels pricey? Just think of how much it would cost to do it yourself.

[professor-tammi]

@ariverofmilk replied to your post “normally I am perfectly ok going longer periods of time without any...”

If you have to stay at home or wherever, do somethign unrelated to social media or anything that'll make you feel extra lonely, okay?

oh, social media makes you feel lonely? I thought it did the opposite, since watching people interact is like... almost as good as talking to people yourself!! well actually I tell myself that a lot but perhaps it isn’t. maybe I’ve been wrong all along. that’s some food for thought

@ariverofmilk replied to your post “normally I am perfectly ok going longer periods of time without any...”

Is it possible to step outside at all?

I’ve been outside for a few hours already haha, but I have some errands to run tomorrow too, maybe they’ll put me in a better mood :D

[dxmedstudent]

Hi :) hope you're well! I'm applying to study Medicine this year. I was recently talking to a doctor about how Medicine has evolved from being anecdotally based to evidence based, and he asked me whether this is always better e.g. in a GP consultation. I wasn't really sure what to say because I thought evidence based would always be better, but now I'm questioning everything aha. Any thoughts? Thanks so much! Xx

Hello! I’m doing OK; it’s been a very long and challenging week, but tomorrow is a new day. Overall, evidence based medicine is the logical choice, so it makes sense that you’d pick this option. All of us work with guidelines, whether our trust guidelines or national ones like NICE quitance. which are drawn together from evidence from many different studies. They tell us that, when many different cases were examined, X investigation was helpful, whereas Y was not. Or X treatment made a difference, whereas Y did not. This takes into account the experiences of many patients, not just one. It helps us to avoid investigations or treatments that are unlikely to help, with the aim of reducing harm to patients. So we almost always use guidelines to inform our clinical decisionmaking; if we differ from what’s expected, then we have to have  a good reason if whe choose to act differently. We’re trained to follow a logical process; from taking a history and examining, to the steps we follow in investigating a case. Doctoring really does change the way that you think; I feel it makes you more analytical and focused on the details, but you also have to become better at piecing together those details into one unified picture in order to diagnose someone. And of course, you have to be able to filter out the irrelevant coincidences or less important information. There’s a lot of pattern recognition in medicine. That makes us sound a bit like computers. But we’re not. Despite all our scientific training, we’re still people, and our brains still work in normal human ways. We still attach greater significance to things we’ve experienced recently, or to things that we have an emotional connection to.After my team had to deal with a serious but rare (and ultimately fatal) case, every time I came across somethign slightly similar, it was at the back of the mind. “Make sure it’s not this!” said the little voice in my head. It’s totally anecdotal, and I’ll probably never see a case of the same thing again. But I can’t say that it didn’t leave an impression. The experiences we have will colour how we view future cases; we build on our previous experiences. Not only ours, but those of our colleagues and friends can have a huge impact on us; we share our cases and learn from each other, because all of us want to be the best that we can be, and help anyone that we can. We all have different personal experiences, and they influence the things we watch out for. If you look carefully, each senior you work with will be particularly uptight about one thing that you won’t understand; perhaps they got burned in the past by a case that they wish they hadn’t missed. People in medicine talk about the little voice in your head. The doctor’s intuition that says “this looks OK, but it really isn’t”. The voice you always listen to, because it tends to signal that something is about to go Very Wrong very soon. Even if the numbers are OK. Some people think it’s gut instinct, but I don’t think it is, not really. I think it’s the combination of the logical pattern recognition that has been drilled into us, and the personal experiences of ourselves and the peers that have shared their stories. I think it’s just us picking up really subtle cues, that perhaps we’ve seen or heard about before. But we can’t always work out the rationale, so it seems irrational on the surface. But life is weird. Sometimes things don’t quite follow the rules you’d expect. In GP, a lot of it is how you relate to the patient, and what the patient is telling you. GPs do a lot more training in consultation styles, because they have a lot less time to get a lot more information out of patients, and because they have to form longterm relationships with their patients. They learn a lot about how to read people, and how to find out what’s really bothering someone, and what to do about it; i.e. how they can get someone to open up about what’s really bothering them, so they can leave the consultation room happy and with their problem sorted. GPs are wizards of persuasion. Guidelines can’t teach you exactly how to draw out your particular patient from their shell, because each person is different. When you’re in the consultation room, it’s just you and the patient, and you have to learn how to relate to each and every person in the best way that you can.Perhaps what he meant is that sometimes, we’re led by more than just rules and clear cut guidance. There’s a human art to medicine as well.

[squky]

Mystic Messenger Another Story ー Day 4 Phone Call Choices

Note: Due to the HG cost of outgoing calls to Ray and V, and of loading your game, I am only going to go through one call tree for Ray+V and incoming calls per playthrough of the day. My choices will be marked with a  ✔ incase the conversation choices branches when you make your answer decisions.  

Jumin, Incoming call, Day 4, after 12:16 I always sleep late ~  ✔ Apology accepted since it's you...  ✔ I use a scientific mattress.  ✔ I sleep on the floor. Nice, sturdy floor.  ✔ Jade mat. Looks like that's how you're programmed.  ✔ You're such a regular person.  ✔ Maybe you'll remember after you get some rest. You'd like to see V, perhaps?  ✔ That's sometimes happens. It's not something rare.  ✔

707, Outgoing call, Day 4, after 12:16am Huff ~ Huff ~ ...Seven? Beep ~ beep ~ beep ~ Seven, I'm scared. Ghost stories! I love them! Same here! Kyaaaaaa!! And then...? What? Come on, say it! But I don't think that's somethign easy to mistake for ... Or maybe that thign was already in the seat right next to you... Don't you think you were mistaken? What? I don't want to hear it! Kya! Dust Kya! I'm scared! What...? That's so lame. Seven, can't you stay with me for the night?

Yoosung, Outgoing call, after 12:16am, Day 4 Yoosung? I wanna break into your base... That's what I call addiction to game. I wish you would focus on me like that. Try orchestrating me... I'm sure you'll do great when you get used it it. I thought you were going to take a break...? Run, warrior! Run out there! Fight! Win! Crush'em!! Go fight the forces of evil, Price Yoosung!

Ray, Outgoing call, after 12:16am, Day 4 What are you doing at this hour?  ✔ I mostly think about my menu tomorrow. Mostly I think about myself. Mostly I think about you.  ✔ Of course.  ✔ I'm not sure. I perfer the AIs. Yes, I can fel how you feel more than enough. Easier said than done. Ok, then let's start with the stripping first.  ✔

V, outgoing call, Day 4, after 12:16am Are you hitting on me right now?  ✔ I like talking to you, too. You're so sweet and inncocent, V! Maybe the one for him was someone else. What does it mean?  ✔ I think you're going too far with that... It's beautiful.  ✔ Now let me see your love.  ✔  (y’all, don’t answer with the one. It sucks) I'm sure she already knows. Could you please stop talking about another woman?

Zen, Incoming call, after 2:34am, Day 4 Couldn't you care a little more about the cat?  ✔ I think Seven is a naughty kid.  ✔ Someday you will find a role made just for you.  ✔ Don't you think your expectations are too high?  ✔ 

I'm sure you'll get a chance soon.  ✔  Why don't you write scripts yourself?  ✔          1.What about the story on the RFA members?  ✔         2. Not really.

Would you like help with that?  ✔  I'd like to be your lady on the stage, Zen.  ✔ 

Jumin, Outgoing call, after 2:34am, Day 4

Jumin, why are you staying up late at this hour? Hehe, were you waiting for me? I can't imagine what kind of pain you were during an interview... No wonder it's tricky. It's a final interview. If I make it to the recruitment, can I marry you? I think I will someday reach my goals if I work hard without giving up. I think luck is important. I don't know. I don't have a goal. I don't know. Swing by your place, maybe? My day starts now. I'm going to bed now.

Jaehee, Outgoing call, after 8:15am, Day 4

Who's Chairman Han? Jaehee, It's me... [your MC's name here]... I'd like to know what an assistant does! You're so professional! You rock! What is their preferences are completely different? How about a snack bar on the road? That's no fun. I wanna be like you! Whoa... That must be such a toll...

Zen, Outgoing call, after 8:15am, Day 4 Good morning to you too, Zen~ How did you do last night, O Zen the Gorgeous? Um... You didn't just get your Internet, did you? I don't  use them a lot, either. I'll show the entire world who my man is. I don't really show it. What about you, Zen? Special delivery you you ~ ! I wanna see those sex fibers composing your back. I'd hate to hang up... Good luck!

Ray, Outgoing call, after 8:15am, Day 4   (This phonecall was blah-ish) Good morning ~ I feel good hearing you so early..  ✔ Attention... I need attention. What are you doing now, Ray?  ✔ Do you have a cheat? So far so good. Hey, could you give me a tip on this?  ✔ You sound so confident.  ✔ Thanks for the tip. I'm going to do whatever I want. I'll keep that in mind. Let's go somewhere with me after I'm done wit this game.  ✔

Jaehee, Incoming call, after 10:22am, Day 4 Why would you ask me that? You mean he's not at his work right now?  ✔ Why won't he pick up? You should do the same to him. It must be tough for you, Jaehee.  ✔ That's what work is like. Think about Zen and fins peace. I'll be your bamboo forest.  ✔          1. Jaehee, you gotta do better than that!  ✔          2. So Jumin likes stripes! 

Jumin, Outgoing call, after 10:22am, Day 4 You can look forward to it. Not at all. I'm not sure. I'll do the best I can. Party is all you think about, Jumin. I want to be reborn as V in my next life. Maybe V is working really really hard. Jumin, you're very fond of V. I'll replace V and stay with you. You're a good friend, Jumin. You can leave V with a cutie - me!

Yoosung, outgoing call, after 10:22am, Day 4 Yep. How do you feel? I'd more than like to stalk you. Are you off to class? You said you're off to class. Yoosung... Your memories are failing you already...? Why don't you take a gap year and play nonstop? You souldn't play too much. I think you need a lesson, Yoosung.

Jaehee, outgoing call, after 12:00pm, Day 4 Wow - it's Jaehee! Working hard today as well? A girl only cries three times in her life. I cry every day. You scolded her because she cleaned your desk? Why didn't you cry together? She shouldn't have done that. You have so much work to do, Jaehee. Bad Mr. Han!

V, outgoing call, after 12:00pm, Day 4 How are you doing, V? Are you having your meals?  ✔ Well... Sort of. I'm doing great!  ✔ No. Yes, a lot.  ✔ I like Mr. Han! I like Zen! I like Jaehee and Yoosung! I like God7! You are my favorite!  ✔ 1. I was saying that I like you as a person. Don't get me wrong.  ✔ 2. A goal is meant to be achieved. I'll take care of this. Let's get married first, V. I feel so safe thanks to you.  ✔

Yoosung, Incoming call, after 2:41pm, Day 4 Didn't you just say you're off to class?  ✔ Then you should just skip! That's a good professor. Don't you think he's neglecting his students too much?  ✔ Jaehee. Seven. V.  ✔ Zen. Jumin.

V, Incoming call, after 5:36pm, Day 4 Yes, of course.  ✔ No, I'm busy. V! I love you! V! You're stupid!  ✔ Yes, I can! Yes, I can year you!!!  ✔ I'm not deaf ~ Please take care of him.  ✔ You can keep talking to me, can't you? You should take this opportunity to get a new phone. Intelligence team...?  ✔ No, not really.

707, Outgoing call, after 5:36pm, Day 4 Seven? Please don't cry. Let's talk things out slowly. Seven...? What are you talking about?

707, Incoming call, after 6:42pm, Day 4 Not yet ~  ✔ I did. What about you. Why do you sound like that? Ice cream is for kids. I like soft ice cream. The one you get on a cone. I like to chew on my popsicle.  ✔ Nobody asked you to tell me that. Who did you share it with? Next time, share it with me!  ✔

Jumin, outgoing call, after 6:42pm, Day 4 Yo, it's me. Jumin, what are you up to? Yes, of course. No. I guess you gotta make strit preparations with the interview. Oh... Are you gonna show them what you're made of? That's so cool. What did you talk about?

V, Outgoing call, after 6:42pm, Day 4 V, what are you doing? Have a nice chat with me, if it's okay with you.  ✔ I'm about to plan what midnight snack I'll have tonight.  ✔ I'm talking to you. V, what is love to you? V, what is a sexy guy to you?*   ✔ V, what am I to you? V, what is friendship to you? V, what kid of person are you? Do you have some kind of fetish with questions?  ✔ I'll ask you later when I have a question ~

* (I was laughing SO FREKIN HARD when I picked this answer!!)

Ray, Outgoing call, after 6:42pm, Day 4 I merely wanted to make a call. Nothing more...! You don't need to tell me.  ✔ These AIs have lots of problems. They're more fun than I thought.  ✔ I need something better than this. I'll look forward to it.  ✔ So what is this something that might be completely different?

707, Outgoing call, after 8:10pm, Day 4 (THIS IS MY FAVORITE PHONECALL OF THE ROUTE!!)(Spoil at your own risk) But it's not my birthday. Seven, are you okay...? I'd like to have you as my birthday gift. What does methal health have to do with a delicacy...? You can't leave me out when you're eating. Mint!  Chocolate. Wasabi desune. A sexy flavor.* Strawberry or vanilla.**

A human brain needs sugar! You should learn other ways to use ice cream.          1. You can ask your girlfriend later on.***          2. I can't say anymore. For the sake of underage players. I'll keep that in mind if I'm on a diet. (2nd best answer)

* (I fucking LOST IT when i read this answer!! As well as lost it through Seven answering my answer) ** (He sounds so ENTHUSIASTIC when answering this answer. Oh god, my heart...~) ***   (fucking LOST IT AGAIN while reading this answer. I literally had to stop and BREATHE for a minute before I could start typing these choices out.)

Jaehee, Outgoing call, after 8:10pm, Day 4 Jaehee! I need your help!         1.Hehe, just kidding!         2.I'm so hungry... No, I'm just calling. Are you interested in V? Jumin is the real leader. I'd like you to please not poke your nose. Yes, I will.

Ray, Incoming call, after 9:53pm, Day 4 And what are we doing? I was playing.  ✔ I miss you, too.  ✔ You're listening to an automated speaker, Please leave your message after the beep. Beep. What is it?  ✔ I don't care about the taste. Anything's good as long as it's food. I'm good with bitter stuff! I can drink coffe without sugar! Sweet is the best. Best are the desserts!  ✔ But Ray, is your headache better?  ✔ Thanks for the call.

Zen, outgoing call, after 9:53pm, Day 4 I seek your teachings, o master! Aww, I wonder what made you excited again...! I did hear that you were a genius actor. You're happy you got a compliment from a kid? He's so cute! Can you call me cute, too? I'm always rooting for you.

Yoosung, outgoing call after 9:53pm, Day 4 When are you going to bed? Yoosung, you're playing games, right? It's fine as long as your don't play too hard. No player in the world can match me at games. Nah. I don't like the fanatics ~ Do you like it that much? What are your, some believer in LOLOL-ism? Give it a try. What about your studies...?