#something something i cannot REST
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hoomanbeaning · 1 year ago
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n.m.sanchez's initial meeting
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liorlen · 2 years ago
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gale origin playthru from astarion’s pov or smth like that
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egophiliac · 2 years ago
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now that I can think semi-coherently again...whooooo's ready for Friday WEEHOO
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uncanny-tranny · 2 years ago
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I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.
It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.
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javierduffy · 4 months ago
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different.
#can’t help but recognize how kieran is a fantastic unspoken representation of autism#i see a lot of myself in him and the way that he is so isolated and lonely and yet cannot help but perform and find solace in his daily#routines is so heartbreaking in its own way to me. like no matter what you do or where you are you have no choice but to be yourself and fun#nction the only way you know how and it will never not be vastly different from everyone else. and when you’re surrounded by people who DONT#like you and will not accommodate and are not at all willing or curious in understanding WHY you are the way you are you’re left to just ….#live in your own head forever. i’m certain kieran thinks many wonderous things and sees the world in a beautiful light and i know this becau#se i am autistic myself and because of that i see the world in colours that neurotypical people will never comprehend but we’re never allowe#d to see the world through kieran’s eyes. we are never allowed to see where his heart rests or the poetry he waxes or what he believes or wh#at his triggers are or what’s a stim and what’s just habit or anything. anything. the breeze sounds different to him and he can hear birds f#or miles and the sun makes every hair on his arms tingle and that’s why he wears layers everywhere and every green he sees sings a beautiful#song to him and yet we’ll never know. because he is too different even for the van der linde gang. he is incomprehensible to them and he doe#s all of his 4/5 daily tasks over and over and over again and while he would always do them and will always do them because they are innate#to him no one will ever know just what they mean to him. no one will ever know that kieran duffy can distinguish the horses behind him by th#eir breathing cadences behind him as he scrubs the spare saddle with the sun high above his head and he can know when something is wrong bec#ause he can hear it. no one will ever know that he CAN read but the only thing he’s interested in is books about wildlife and horses and fis#h in particular and no one will ever know because he knows no one will ever understand or even care and if they do they’ll be sure to make#it a point to tell him how DIFFERENT he is. and realistically even if the vdl’s DID come around to liking him he STILL would NEVER be unders#tood. i know for certain he would always be described as odd and despite its new affectionate approach he would still be the odd one out wit#h his daily routines and his texture preferences and his inability to make eye contact and his erratic seemingly random triggers and his#anxiety that seems to have a mind of its own. no one would ever know how bright the tree leaves are in his eyes or how every horse smells di#fferent or why sometimes it’s more fun to reel his rod in over and over instead of actually catching a fish. he will always be …. different.#sorry. novel moment. he means a lot to me.#i’m not super happy with how he looks in these but i’m just trying to draw more :’) i always say that but i always mean it too#also if my novel makes no sense then just ignore it. it’s late and my head hurts. i tend to get tangential#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#kieran duffy#image#art#hero draws sometimes
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broareweabouttoviberightnow · 5 months ago
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am I getting too convoluted if I said Johnny dies Dallas lives n Pony loses his hearing as a result of the way Dallas hits him (to put out the fire) when he pulls him out of the church au??
#idk man#this idea has been rotting in my head for a long time#i have like a terribly rough outline#where basically the events of the book happen exactly as canon up until post church fire#so pony johnny n dallas are in the hospital#n ponys reeling from literally everything that just happened#n he reunites with soda n darry n suddenly realizes like oh fuck#i cannot hear sodas hysterically releived laughter#or darrys voice as he thanks god ponys fine#n then the dr pulls darry aside n tells him that pony has profound hearing loss as a result of an injury sustained during the fire#the last voice he will ever have heard clearly is johnnys#johnny dies canon complicent#but before dallas can get himself shot by the cops darry gets to him first#so dallas survives#pony learns asl from a deaf woman who their family has always been familiar with#since their parents were always real keen on including people that the rest of the world looked down on#dallas has to deal with not only surviors guilt but feeling like he took something from Pony that can never be given back#he has his own arc with the woman#but it basically all boils down to deafness is not the LOSS of something#but rather just the ADDITION of a new community n language n experience#plus dallas learns sign n is just utterly overwhelmed by feelin like his hands can be used for somethin soft n good#UGH#if yall wanna hear more about this lemme know#bc i have been thinking about this for a WHILE#the outsiders#sodapop curtis#ponyboy curtis#darry curtis#dallas winston#the outsiders 1983
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dirtytransmasc · 7 months ago
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I think I need MelVik connecting when Viktor was on his sick bed. they had been amicable before, maybe a little more than that due to their connection through Jayce and her presence around Hextech and such. but they weren't entirely friends. not yet.
and she goes to see him. perhaps she feels a tinge of guilt at assuming the worst about Jayce, or her bleeding heart makes her feel responsible for keeping Jayce out of the lab when Viktor had needed him. maybe Jayce needs to step out for a moment, and she soothes his worry by promising to sit with Viktor. maybe she just wants to be closer to the man that's so painfully important to the one she loves, wants to befriend him, wants to know him, all before it's far too late.
maybe it's a little bit of each.
but she goes to see him. she sits in the chair that Jayce has nearly worn a hole through, and keeps a semi-awkward distance between them, not knowing what is too close and too far.
this man is dying. he is dying and he has accepted that. he looks like a corpse. cold emanates off of him. he is something she doesn't fully understand.
she doesn't know how to approach.
but she does.
she greets softly and speaks softly and hesitates to touch, but rests a hand over Viktor's and feels how cold he is, even as a sickly warmth brews in his bones, leeching the warmth from his skin and the energy from his body.
he seems surprised she's there. it feels out of place. like the song and dance of their dynamic has shifted, and now he needs to relearn the steps. and now this is a dance of two, not three.
she will tell Viktor, in enough detail to be understood and not enough to be awkward, where Jayce was. because it feels right to confess. it's not an apology, but the avoidance of keeping something like a secret from a dying man.
Viktor will probably just nod and say something self deprecating, because what else do you say when your body is already making a joke of itself? before assuring her that Jayce is not his keeper, that she is not to blame, but even that comes off as some twisted attempt at humor. sue him for being sardonic as he lay dying.
but unlike Jayce, who will cringe at the jokes, she will hide a smile behind her fingers, muffling a soft, if not saddened, chuckle in her palm.
Viktor's eyes will light up ever so slightly.
she'll feel awkward once more. should she have laughed? was this playing into a complex? was this right of her?
Viktor will smile weakly.
she'll feel a little less awkward.
she will realize Viktor needs someone to laugh with. that Jayce, bless his soul, cannot be that person for Viktor. his worry has brewed too long. it's too strong.
but maybe a fresh face like Mel's can be there to smile when Jayce cannot. will laugh when Jayce cannot. can make cheeky jokes and pokes and prods.
the three fit together like 3 pieces of 3 broken puzzles. they fit together, not perfectly, but they fit, and create a finished object, even if off kilter her and uneven there. but it's ok, they're making due.
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damfangirl08 · 11 months ago
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Im working on the "Legend and Time get turned into children and Mask causes chaos while Little Legend causes angst" fic so if anyone has any suggestions feel free to either interact with this or send me an ask! Also please help me pick a name for Little Legend because i cannot call him Little Legend
would like to add that im making it so baby legend has been on two adventures, alttp and cadence of hyrule because its funny to me
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spicynoodlehouse · 3 months ago
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“I look ridiculous,” Albus grumbled at his reflection. 
“You look like James,” Scorpius said.
“Like I said, ridiculous.”
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Drew this just to get a better picture in my head of what they look like! 💚🐍
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grif-hawaiian-rolls · 6 months ago
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My RvB Secret Santa gift for @hipstersoulgushers!!!!
You asked for Locpez in space, and i spent three days trying to figure out how to show the inside of the A'rynasea, so these two could go off on their own little adventure
No clue what they're talking about but i hope you like it! :D
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neolxzr · 5 months ago
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i know it wasn't just a dream
(au info: here)
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mohntilyet · 7 months ago
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also i talk about 'getting lucanis out' like it's an easy thing but i do genuinely wonder if he experiences cognitive dissonance over it all. surely he must know if he stays with the crows and stays first talon, he's stuck in this state forever. he can change things, but how long does that last? how many times has he thought, guilty, 'maybe after caterina dies, i can be free'? how many crows will be waiting for him to die, so they can go back to killing for coin without thinking of the innocents lucanis wants to save? how could he ever ensure that? and if he has kids (i don't even think. he wants kids frankly.) i refuse to believe he would abuse them the way caterina abused him. like how does he raise any child to take over a guild that is infamous for infighting. he doesn't need to look far to know how that goes. the dellamortes used to be 14 members strong, and within a few decades that number gets whittled down to 3. lucanis stays with the crows? it can be whittled down to 0. but the dellamorte legacy remains. how on earth could he ever extract himself from the mess he's inherited. how could he ever trust any other hand except his own
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sidesteppostinghours · 1 month ago
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Happy birthday, Charge
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laqueus · 11 months ago
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i'm rewatching tron uprising again for the first time in a while and I'd forgotten just how... graphic??? some of the violence is
holes punched in chests (multiple occasions)! a bisected guard dragging themself across the floor & trailing digital gore! a (failed) public execution where the prisioners are being pulled apart by lightcycles! dyson's caved-in skull! tron's entire fucking torture scene that was genuinely harrowing to watch! let's carve out his eye! let's carve out tron's fucking eye!
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sleepanonymous · 2 months ago
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not me frantically going through my spotify playlists listing to songs i think i might miss in the next couple of months when all i listen to is Even in Arcadia on repeat I Am A Normal Person 🤡
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rochenn · 2 years ago
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lightsaber wielders being forced to use a steel blade >>>>>>>
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