#source: secret goblin

[incorrectvoyagerquotes]

Turanj (one of the Hirogen from The Killing Game two-parter): You mean to torture me? I know pain, human.

Captain Janeway: But do you know... (holds up stack of paper) my D&D character's 19-page backstory?

Turanj: Wait.

Janeway: Aleana Featherwind was born a human princess but abandoned because of her snow white hair.

Turanj: Please stop.

Janeway: She was found by a tribe of wood elves, who raised her as their own. But as a child of two worlds...

Turanj: Oh god.

[incorrectlighttreasonquotes]

Jan Brewer: You mean to torture me? I know pain, Liberal.

Allison: But do you know... (holds up stack of paper) my D&D character's 19-page backstory?

Jan: Wait.

Allison: Aleana Featherwind was born a human princess but abandoned because of her snow white hair.

Jan: Please stop.

Allison: She was found by a tribe of wood elves, who raised her as their own. But as a child of two worlds...

Jan: Oh god.

[ashthesalamipiece]

"You Wanna Run That Back?"

Fem!Reader x Kirishima x Bakugou (poly) – Domestic / Crack-Fluff / Post-baby chaos

Sequel here

---

It was one of those mornings where everything felt just a little too loud.

The baby was fussing, you were half-asleep with your shirt halfway up, and Kirishima was shirtless in the kitchen making eggs one-handed like some kind of breakfast god while holding a bottle in the other.

And then there was Bakugou.

Bakugou Katsuki: combat-ready hero, battle-hardened, emotionally constipated... and currently shirtless on the couch, cradling his infant son with all the confidence of someone defusing a bomb. Which, honestly, might’ve been less terrifying to him.

You sat nearby, sipping coffee and watching with half-lidded amusement as Katsuki awkwardly adjusted the baby against his bare chest.

“You’re holding him like he’s radioactive,” you yawned.

“He is radioactive,” Bakugou grumbled. “He exploded in his diaper twice yesterday.”

“He’s three months old. He literally doesn’t know what a diaper is.”

Bakugou narrowed his eyes. “He knows enough. I see the look in his eye. He’s plotting.”

You snorted just as the baby started rooting—wiggling, snuffling, little fists clenched as he nuzzled against Bakugou’s chest.

“Uh, Katsuki,” you said, leaning forward, amused, “I think he’s looking for—”

Too late.

The baby latched.

To Bakugou’s nipple.

There was a full second of pure silence.

And then—

“WHAT THE F— OI!!” Bakugou shouted, absolutely scandalized. “WHAT—WHY—HE’S GOT TEETH—!!”

You howled with laughter, nearly spilling your coffee as Bakugou tried to detach his son, who was now happily suckling on his very confused, very muscular, very male father’s chest.

From the kitchen, Kirishima peeked in with a spatula mid-air. “Wait, did he—? Bro. Bro. Did he think you were—?”

“YES!” Bakugou yelled, holding the baby out like he’d just found out he was a secret landmine. “He bit me! This little goblin tried to breastfeed from me!!”

Kirishima was laughing so hard he had to put the pan down before he dropped it. “Bro, your chest is kinda soft lately—maybe he got confused!”

Bakugou glared murder. “Say that again and I’m burning your protein powder.”

Meanwhile, the baby was just giggling now, cheeks round and happy, hands reaching back out for his unsuspecting pseudo-milk-source.

“He just loves you,” you giggled, wiping your eyes. “He thinks Papa Boom is his backup bottle.”

“I will sue this child,” Bakugou growled, clutching his offended nipple. “I’m emotionally traumatized.”

Kirishima flopped onto the couch beside him, still grinning. “You sure you’re not lactating, babe? You’ve been glowing lately.”

Bakugou looked personally offended.

You got up, scooped the baby into your arms, and planted a kiss on Katsuki’s cheek. “Thanks for the tit-ful service, Papa.”

Kirishima wheezed.

Bakugou looked into the void.

“I hate this family.”

He didn’t, though.

Because an hour later, while you fed the baby from the correct chest, Katsuki was already curled up beside you, muttering under his breath while Kirishima tried not to giggle from the corner.

And when the baby finished and curled up between his dads with a sleepy little sigh, Bakugou was the one who kissed his head and whispered, “Try that again and I’m putting you up for adoption.”

[herdarkestnightelegance]

Magpie Stash

Pairing: Astarion/ g/n unnamed Tav Tags: fluff, trauma Length: 1k words Summary: While looting, Astarion comes across items he wants to own.

A/N: Another headcanon which I may have shared with some of the talented fan fiction writers out there before. So, if that’s the case, don’t come for me! But holy Hells this got much longer than I planed! I guess this is s drabble now? Or a whole ass fanfic? You tell me 😂

Thank you wonderful @nyx-knox for the beta reading! It was *chef‘s kiss* ✨

::::::::

Astarion has not owned anything in 200 years.

The only things he could call his were his wits and the clothes on his back - and both he cared for and mended meticulously.

But suddenly he’s part of a ragtag group of strangers, and he finds himself looting a temple not far from where they crashed with a damn Nautiloid after being abducted and infected by mindflayer parasites. And frankly, he’s not entirely sure what part he finds most surprising.

Finding food, weapons and healing potions is a priority. For the others. Not so much him. Honestly. Why should he bother looking for food he won’t even eat? He doesn’t know these weirdos.

But he humors them and even aids his positively helpless companions by picking locks. And as he opens the lid of a gilded chest, something catches his eye.

Beneath old parchment and a rotten carrot he finds …. pretty things? There’s a particularly sparkly ring. A skilfully bound book with gilded letters on the cover. A fine silk scarf hemmed with the most delicate fell-stitches …

He has no idea if those items are of any value. They certainly are useless for the group. But … they are beautiful. And he wants, no he needs to own them. So without giving it too much thought, he takes them.

He has no intention of selling *HIS* items to the vendor they meet at the Tiefling Camp. Hells, he doesn’t even have the intention of showing them to his companions.

He wants these pretty things for himself, he wants to keep them safe. The spawn siblings used to steal from one another all the time, so he’s used to being protective over his meagre possessions. Can’t shake 200 years of hypervigilance that easily.

::::::::

Over the next days and weeks of travel, Astarion fills up a little purple leather pouch with whatever catches his eye. Going through the diverse collection of beautiful bits and bobs for a few moments before meditating becomes a secret source of calm for Astarion. A soothing ritual, especially after the more straining days.

Which is what he’s doing now. He sits on his bedroll cross-legged, inspecting the things. His things. His little private treasure trove. That he owns.

A bejeweled comb, random gold coins, a tiny picture frame containing an even tinier painting …

The only piece of his treasure that gave him more of a bittersweet feeling had been a silver hand-mirror he had found in the goblin infested village. To be honest, he was not too mad when he accidentally smashed it in frustration the other night after talking to Tav.

Tav. Their unofficial leader. They never seem to have a problem sharing the things they find. They share their food with the group, their scrolls, and they even gave Astarion that freakish but intriguing tome they had found in that cellar. Far too generous, if you ask him.

As Astarion packs up his collection he hears coughing outside. Again. It’s been going on all night.

He peeks out. Tav is on second watch. The night is cold, and they just added another log to the fire. Still, the cool wind is picking up and Tav pulls their cloak close around their neck - which unfortunately does not prevent the coughing.

For a moment, Astarion considers just ignoring them, letting them hack up a lung. But to his dismay, he … cares? He finds he doesn’t want Tav to be cold or sick. But it’s just because he just doesn’t want their coughing to get annoying. That’s all. Obviously.

So he leaves his tent and saunters up to their leader, who greets him with a sleepy but friendly smile.

Astarion holds out his hand to Tav, holding a long piece of white fabric. He’s offering them his beautiful silk scarf with the immaculate fell-stitched hem that he had inspected a lot over the past weeks.

„You’re coughing too much, darling. It’s keeping me up and I do need my beauty sleep.” he says with mock indignation and his trademark smirk.

„Thank you.“ Tav says as they take the scarf from his hand and wraps it around that oh so delicious neck of theirs.

After an awkward moment of silence Astarion offers a final „Well. Good night, my dear.“ with a courteous bow and walks back to his tent.

He can’t help but wonder at the strange feeling in his chest. Tav can and will never know just what big of a deal this small gesture was for the pale Elf.

For the first time in 200 years Astarion gave away something that was his simply because he wanted to. He wanted them to have it. Because they needed it more than him. And not only that. He does not even expect anything in return. How in the Hells did that happen?

He’s sure it’s nothing.

:::::::

A few years from then, Astarion finds himself in the cellar beneath Tav’s and his home. He’s looking for something, and he’s sure it has to be here somewhere.

“Aha!” From the trunk before him he pulls a skilfully bound book - even though the gilded letters on the cover have worn off with time.

He opens the book - and huffs in relief. And nervousness. It’s still right where he left it between the pages all those years ago.

Hidden inside the old book lies a particularly sparkly ring.

He smiles. A lot has changed since that day they looted that temple and he found his first little treasures. Back then Astarion couldn’t fathom sharing his magpie stash - or anything, for that matter - with anyone. And now? Now he shares a home with the person he loves. And he plans on sharing so much more with them.

What better way of showing that than by proposing with the first thing he ever called his? Because now there’s only one thing, or rather person, he wants for himself. The one person he wants to share everything with.

He looks at the particularly sparkly ring.

Yes. This should do nicely.

So, and on a completely unrelated note: When does a headcanon become a full on fanfic lol?

[some-small-mercy]

Abhari Atlas - An Introduction to the Outer Seas

When the Celestial Host cast down and butchered the Arch-Demons of the lower depths and from them made Creation, they did not do so with a single mind, or in a single effort. The Inner World upon which you and I walk is perfectly formed, and aligned with every principle of True and Beauty - it is for this reason that the Great Gods of Heaven believed it a suitable home for the sublime Order of man and spirit we know as civilization. Make no mistake, I am no Godsemeren pollyanna - the Inner World is replete with heresy and witchcraft, with demons and apostates and every other horror. But it is full, too, of honor and beauty, of loyalty and piety, and of all the countless Glories which obedience to the Chain of Being and true Religion allow. 

But the Inner - or, as I have elsewhere argued it should be more rightly called, the Higher - World was the Celestial Divines’ masterwork, not their first attempt. In ages past, the learned and pious believed that it was built upon the ruins of these previous efforts, and it was from this imperfection that the taint of demology and witchcraft first seeped into the world. I am loathe to contradict such august and ancient sources, but in our modern age this has been proven false - the prototypes and failed attempts at the creation of the World were not destroyed or built over, they were instead cast down and hidden away, or put by the Heavens to some lesser purpose suitable to their failings and what virtues they had. 

There is a great diversity among the nations and the peoples of the Higher World and so the first service provided by a study of the Outer Seas is a contrast by which their similarities might be seen. They are all, for example, human, born imbued with a mortal soul and an honoured place in the Chain of Being. Thus, it is only through sin or tragedy that their form becomes misshapen or corrupted - this is not the case for the greater part of the creatures whose crude facsimiles of government and culture populate most Outer Seas. Not all, of course - some come close to the perfection of the Higher World, their peoples only barely distinguishable from our own. Others are earlier and less finished prototypes, or else abandoned due to some fundamental corruption or flaw, and their natives the same. Yet others were the prisons of great Titans or other fallen Angels, and even if they were once filled with true humanity, ages of capricious interference and corruption have left their descendents weakened or deformed in some manner, either in body or soul. They are not demons, or even goblins, but obvious signs of this inhumanity in visage or bearing, and hereditary tendencies to some particular corruption, abound. It is for these reasons and more that no Outer Sea has produced true Civilization or true Religion on its own, and none have proved capable of equalling the achievements or resisting the arms of the Higher World without the open support of another fully human power (however corrupt it might be). 

It was through just that corruption that the Outer Seas were first discovered - for who but warlocks and apostates would ever cut their way through the skein of the world into the abyss beyond, without any surety that there was a solitary thing to be found? Yet the piety and virtue of the Hierarch then ruling in Imir was soon rewarded with a method of invoking the grace and power of Heaven and its Sublime Will which opened the way for the World-Empire’s own ships. The methods and engines are closely guarded trade secrets of the relevant guilds and orders, but in any case require great ocean-going vessels and occulted prayers and rites that are in every case beyond the means of any lacking the genius of true humanity. 

The methods by which Outer Seas are charted are occulted, but their organization is obvious and clear, arranged in harmonious alignment such that their cosmic distance to the Higher World and the ease with which they can be reached mirrors the severity of their flaws and corruption. Thus the Pearl Sea, one of the nearest and first-charted, is almost indistinguishable from the heartlands of the Empire, and its populace - once winnowed in the Crusade that won it - so close to full humanity to be as worthy of the name as a great many peasants along the Empire’s other marches and borderlands. Thus also, though less happily, the Onyx Sea where the Celmean League’s colonies and daughter-cities have recruited from and interbred with the existing populace so eagerly with no loss of skill or vigor - and where under the Lord Regent’s Tyranny the Empire’s own holdings were lost entirely in one disastrous war after another.

Most Seas are not so blessed of course. Arrayed in an astral orrery, they spiral out, descending from the Higher World and growing more unfinished and flawed in perfect sequence. The remainder that are so close to true reality that a layman would not notice the difference are so small and marginal as to not be worth contesting the claims other principalities have made on them. The next great prizes are middling seas, obviously unfinished and dangerous to both body and soul to sail, yet full of riches and opportunity for glory that explain why the Gods Above allowed mortal eyes to chart the course to them. Here are the great prisons and blasphemous ateliers of Titan and Fae, the kingdoms of oxen walking on two hooves and birds conversing wholly through the fractured words of their long-dead trainers. This, then, is the land where legends and fortunes are made, and where treasure fleets and privateer squadrons sail for under every flag. They are also, as a whole, the theaters within which civilized powers now compete to outdo each other in colonial glory, and where each struggles to put the native creatures encountered to their most beneficial purpose. The rare examples where the creatures have not yet been brought to heel by one power or another - the cavern-dwelling clans of the Iron Sea, mostly famously - remain so by the combination of unusually belligerent and untrusting natives and a lack of treasures to justify the cost. 

At an even further remove are the Seas so primitive and distant from the Divine Plan that the dangers yet outweigh the riches and revelations they offer. Thus, the Starlit Sea, where there is neither dawn nor moon nor horizon, and the stars above are reflected by the glittering heralds of ruin beneath the waves. Thus the Whispering Depths, where any wind can be bought only with the sacrifice of a mortal soul whose breath might move it - and whose voice and secrets then taunt any who hear them for a year and a day. Thus, most of all, the Abyss itself, as dark and depthless as any entrance to Perdition, whose waters swallow ship and swimmer alike.

In the remainder of this treatise, then, I shall focus my efforts on those middling seas, and most specifically on the demi- and in-humans creatures which call them home and which must be truly brought to heel for the Empire’s banner to settle itself in their lands…

-A Discourse on the Higher and Lower Seas, by Brother Adrien of the Poor Fellows of the Sacred Pyre. Despite his later censure for Hierocratic sympathies the work remains a standard reference throughout the Holy Illyrin Empire

[drawing-by-the-bonfire]

♫ To be the wolf ♪ Following the journey to my soul ♪ The wolf ♪ Howling to me, calling to me ♫

— 𖤐 Introduction ⌗

Hello! You can call us Bonfire! We're a DID SMP that's just here to make art and play Minecraft. It's a pleasure to meet you!

Oh, but this is just our art blog! Our SMP blog is @the-bonfiresmp and some of our members' side blogs can be found here if they feel comfortable sharing their blog.

You may have noticed that we don't refer to ourselves as a DID system but rather a DID SMP. We use different system language than other systems when referring to ourselves. It is for our own comfort. A masterlist of our system language/preferred terms can be found here.

— 𖤐 Socials ⌗

Art Fight is forestbonfire.

Discord is forestbonfire.

Simply Plural is The_BonfireSMP.

Art by our friend @gh0stttea!

— 𖤐 Boundaries ⌗

We are in a relationship with another system, so please do not flirt unsolicited or be suggestive without first asking to see if it is okay with the both of us.

Please, no comparing us to omegaverse or suggesting that we are a furry. Nothing wrong with either of those communities, but we're not apart of the omegaverse community, nor are we a furry. We're a pterolycus alterhuman/otherkin.

Don't roleplay with our members and don't treat them like their source unless they ask you to. Thank you.

— 𖤐 Do Not Interact ⌗

No DNI except for fakeclaimers, blatant haters/pricks, and spam/trolls/bots, etc.

— 𖤐 Divider Credits ⌗

Dividers by @sisterlucifergraphics

Dividers by @hyuneskkami

— 𖤐 Our Fandoms ⌗

our faves will be boldened!

TADC, DSMP, Pirates SMP, tales from the SMP , Secret Life, FNAF, epithet erased, eddsworl, Soul eater, Fire Force, Minecraft , Terraria , Creatures of Sonaria , Regretevator , Pressure , Doors , Grace , Delusional Office , Cuphead , SCP , Cookie run kingdom, Inscryption, Stardew, Undertale , Pokemon , D&D , The Walton Files , The Sun Is Missing, Welcome home , Danny Phantom, RWBY, DC Comics (Specifically centered around Gotham/Batman characters) , Somethings Wrong With Sunny Day Jack , The Groom Of Gallagher Mansion , Gavril , Frost Bite , Your Boyfriend , The Bible , Marvel , Spiderverse , Poppy's Playtime , Markiplier (Including ADWM and ISWM) , Lego Monkie Kid , My Hero Academia , Danganrompa , My Little Pony G4 (including infection AUs) , Clinical Trial , Bo Burnam , NCIS , Green Book , Blood Blockade Battlefront , Overwatch , Honkai Star Rail , The Dragon Prince , EPIC , Epic the Musical , Black Butler , Once Upon A Witchlight , The Flash , Transformers , The Green Knight , Doctor Who , Jungle Juice , clinic of horrors , Of swamp and sea , just a goblin, ultimate shut in, the city under saturn, dark zone, the blind prince , suitor armor , the commune , enderbomb , time and time again , castle swimmer , gacha life 2 , love and deepspace , life makeover , moonknight , zootopia , black mirror , mincreaft args (including all of wifies' zachobuild's, render's, and kunai's content and dont look at the moon by RT60), one piece, love death and robots, steven universe, beastars, godzilla, scooby doo , supernatural , arcane, dexter , z nation , cells at work , hot skull (I GOT THE WHOLE ASS BOOK IN TURKISH BECAUSE IT HAD NO ENGLISH TRANSLATED COPIES) , squid game , the wild robot , monkey man , john wick , the pitt , avatar the last airbender , avatar , she-ra and the princesses of power , carmen sandiego , pokemon , kakegurui, bee and puppycat , megamind , the umbrella academy , black summer , strange magic , hellsing , jurassic park franchise , criminal minds, hells paradise , castlevania , dungeun meshi , riiiiise offf the… teenage mutant ninja turtlesss! , nimona , brand new animal , pracific rim (NOT THE SECOND MOVIE ISTG), Sonic the hedgehog, demon slayer, invincible, soma, five nights at candies, encanto, detroit become human, little carly and little kelly adventures, stampy long nose/long head, mine nights at freddy's entire series/movie, mango tango's fnaf series, league of legends, sinners, Metal Cardbot, Just About Any Yandere Visual Novel You Can Think Of, Slenderverse, The Amazing Digital Circus, X-Men

— 𖤐 Our Fictionkins ⌗

Tommyinnit from the DSMP, Sandy from LMK, Music Meister from DC, Leonardo Lionheart from RWBY, James Ironwood from RWBY, Forgetmenot from X-Men Comics, Carl Davidson from Jungle Juice, Wolverine from X-Men Comics

[plethoraworldatlas]

In reading Marcia's review of her experience with Shadowdark, I contemplated on how I run my own OSE games. This is also fresh on my mind because I am running Miranda Elkins' fantastic Nightwick. Its all about distilling things down to the interesting choice and eliminating the non-interesting one.

Basic Equipment: I am thinking about charging my players a flat rate for all basic dungeoneering equipment that is rolled into weekly expenses-- so 7sp a week for expenses plus ~3-5sp for pick of equipment

Not interesting:  Cost of equipment, especially down to coppers

Interesting: Scarcity (what if there is no 50' rope this week?) and how many slots PC dedicates to basic equipment

Light: Due to torch cost and number per slot, it is easy to carry a lot of torches.

Not interesting: Carrying enough light to last 12-24 turns- easily done

Interesting: When torches extinguish-- like in the middle of a fight or when the goblins you are negotiating with get mad; how many hands in the party are occupied by torches

This is why I prefer to use the overloaded encounter die to simulate inopportune moments when a torch is snuffed out- gust of wind, dripping slime, bucket of sand thrown by a sneaky goblin. And with regards to hands, holding a torch potentially lowers AC, removes a weapon, or makes spell casting delayed (need both hands). One saving grace: torches are an improvised weapon that do 1d4 dmg and are on fire.

Stuck Doors: I now commonly interpret the 2-in-6 chance as a basic surprise roll. If they players fail it, they make a loud noise and alert anything on the other side of the door, but open it next round.

Not interesting: Rolling a d6 over and over again to see if PCs finally break down a door

Interesting: Seeing if PC get surprise on whatever is on the otherside; if additional equipment is brought to deal with doors

I usually like the idea that a crowbar allows and additional 1d6 rolled per individual with one.

Rations: This is similar to the situation with light, its easy to carry enough food/water for 2-4 hours which is more likely the time frame of a dungeon delve-- not a camping trip.

Not interesting: Tracking both food and water separately for nominal circumstances

Interesting: How many PCs carry rations; will rations be used for other things (like distracting monsters) or saved to avoid fatigue

For me the nature of rations are both food and water abstracted. So if a player want to use food as a distraction, mark off 1 rations. If a player wants to douse a small fire, use 2 rations as you frantically empty out a water skin and try to put out the fire consuming the spell book.

Secret Doors & Traps:  Two dungeon features that are opposite sides of the same coin. Really I think Chris McDowall has written some of the best bits on this that boil down to "traps are puzzles" and not really "gotcha".

Not interesting: Situations where the PCs have to pick the exact right spot and roll a 1-2 in 6

Interesting: Adding in environmental clues or other sources of information that allows discovery by players investigating the fictional environment

Now, I will keep both rolls as a back-up for either PCs not having a good idea and/or a back-up for perhaps me being unable to convey the fictional environment properly in the moment.

Weapons: I've yet to find a really good way to do weapons simply outside of 1d6 damage for all types. I don't mind BX's variable weapon damage. And I do like some old rulesets sorta "first strike" if your weapon is larger than an opponents other wise smaller, lighter weapons strike first in subsequent arounds.

So here is what I have got so far: Using a weapon two-handed is a +1 to damage, using an off-hand weapon is +1 to-hit, and a shield is of course +1 AC. I do like that fighters with bows can shoot twice if they did not move and the "cleave" ability.

Not interesting: Weapon factors that are so extensive they require a separate rules discussion, trigger player obsession, and/or orient the whole of gameplay to combat

Interesting: What PCs chose to do with their hands: more armor, more weapons, or more light

So that is it for now, if you'd like to see more of my house rules here is my post on the Serpent Song Hymnal. I hope to have a sorta player version created sometime soon but I'm still trying to dial-in what my go-to "french vanilla" D&D is like.

[mogruith]

Chapter VI - Minthara’s Yuletide Reckoning

His face a skull beneath the folds, eyes hollow, dark, and cold— a whisper from the edge of death, with secrets ages old.

Withers reached out his bony hand, and Minthara followed suit. They stepped into her future’s shade, a vision stark and brute.

She saw herself, long cold and dead, her armour picked for gold, as looting goblins mocked her life, now safe from her stronghold.

"She was a terror, harsh and fierce," they laughed and shook their heads; “she made no friends, no bonds in life, just fear and mounting dread.”

To look upon her solemn face, one might well think her deeply stirred, A glimpse of doubt upon her brow, her heart perhaps deterred.

It seemed her gaze grew softened now, as though she'd come to see, that strength alone, without a bond, might truly end in misery.

With visions of her future clear, Minthara felt embolden; and so she turned, with lessons learned, her heart finally wide open.

She called her goblins to the hall, a feast spread wide and grand - A Yuletide bounty, rich and full, set out by her command.

There lay platters heaped with roasted game, with pies and cider poured. Huge hams glazed thick, and golden loaves, and meat pies richly stored.

Jugs of wine and sugared fruits, a spread both fine and rare. Each dish a treat, each plate a prize, beyond what goblins dare.

“Eat well!” she called, her tone sincere, her voice filled with merry cheer, “A happy Yuletide, one and all! Enjoy your feasting here!”

The goblins cheered and tucked right in, grotesque and loud they ate; with gnashing teeth and slobbering lips, they gorged on every plate.

But as they dined, their cheers grew faint, each goblin slowed and sighed. One by one they slumped and fell, as Minthara watched them die.

For every dish was laced with death, each bite a poisoned curse - A Yuletide feast, to end their lives, and leave her halls dispersed.

Minthara laughed, her goblins gone, her eyes as dead as bone, “This Yuletide feast has shown me well - I’m better off alone.

To all who’d dare to scavenge mine, consider yourselves done; for strength is found in solitude - Gods curse you, every one!”

Source: Larian Advent Calendar - Day 12

See the previous chapters:

Chapter I - A Bitter Eve Indeed

Chapter II - Let the Spirits Com

Chapter III - Memories Ser

Chapter IV - Bearer of a Solemn War

Chapter V - An Appeal to Her Present Nature

[soulsongplays]

The Universe of Enchanting

Ah! Hail and well met, traveler. You're not from here, are you? You walk with a confidence the living have not had in this realm for near a century now. You seem confused, friend, I should explain.

The Universe of Enchanting was once a fairly well-off region- not peaceful mind you, The Hate of Moths lead by The Warthog Field Damsto Plaguebones have existed since we first learned to put ink to paper, but once we were not so thoroughly in the hands of darkness. You are lucky to have run into me, as I've been pouring over our histories in an attempt to learn just what went wrong.

The rot that has now taken much of our world has been present since the dawn of history, a legendary scholar of geology who taught the world some of the most fundamental practices of the science, knowledge still used today despite its tainted source. This scholar was The Leather Woman Zukthist Steelshameful.

Wh- stop laughing, this is the rot at the center of our world's decline! This is the greatest evil present in the world, victorious against even the fiends crawled up from the depths of the hells! Yes I know she looks silly, this is a serious matter!

Right, well, later in her natural life (around the year 76) Zukthist became obsessed with her own mortality, and turned to worshiping a darker deity- Bila the Burner of Souls, the elven god of light, of day, of suicide, and of death. It isn't known precisely what she did to gain the god's favor, but what we do know is that shortly after receiving Zukthist's worship, Bila created a slab of Schorl bearing the secrets of life and death and bestowed it upon their faithful servant.

Having secured the immortality she sought, she attempted to go back to her simple life as a geologist, but her nature was changed- and even among elves agelessness does not go unnoticed for long. Driven out of her home, betrayed by the people who she taught so much, she fled to The Coastal Jungle and lead a group of outcasts among the elves known as The Citadels of Rock, and in the year 120 she constructed the first great necromancer's tower of the world, Leapwisps.

From here, the Necromancer would train a large group of necromancers, passing on both the secrets of life and death and the worship of Bila to a number of apprentices who serve her faithfully, leading to the founding of three additional towers across our lands very soon after. The sheer quantity of undead... we were soon overwhelmed, and the living stood little chance.

The forest retreats of the elves were burned, the cities of men pillaged, and the strongholds of the dwarves flooded with the dead, becoming festering pits like those of the goblins. We, the dwarves of The Riddled Flags, once had strongholds across the land, and now we only number a thousand, located in dying strongholds to the south and one above-ground fortress to the north, all of which holding more and more refugees by the day.

And this is where we come to the modern day- the year 200. We've found a site on the edge of The Coastal Jungle, almost in the center of the world, where we believe we may find The Blood of Armok. This material could enable us to turn the tide of this conflict, and as a bonus it is located by the tower Drivenboulder, where one of the greatest enemies of dwarvenkind rests- Logem Lensscars. It was this dwarf who was one of Zukthist's first apprentices, and the first dwarven necromancer to turn on The Riddled Flags.

We will see hoards of the dead, yes, but we will have the mountains to our backs- and if the rumors are true, we must hold this site- there is nothing else that will allow the living to thrive over the dead at this rate. We will secure Armok's Blood, we will kill the traitor Logem Lensscars, and in doing so we will relieve the pressure on our brothers to the north and give the world a fighting chance. We venture out from the fort of Amberglit in the north this morning with the best volunteers we could find, and if all goes well we will win this war, not just for The Riddled Flags, but for the world.

Luckily, Amberglit saw fit to give us some additional supplies, so we'll be starting strong and with... a vast majority of the fort's livestock.

I'm honestly worried they'll run out of food, but I won't complain too much about their generosity. We are the dwarves of The Last Fortress, and we will settle this land called Blueblood or die trying!

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Silly thoughts №6: The Verde Kingdom

⚠️ Spoilers for Ridgeside Village events:

_________________________________________

After thinking about the fact that, according to Ridgeside Village lore, elves still exist to this day (at least a small part) and even have at least one kingdom, I can't get the headcanon out of my head about whether such a kingdom, for example, conducts trade affairs with other cities/kingdoms. It's unlikely that elves deal with modern people from big cities like Zuzu, whether the reason is because of a difference in worldview or a desire to protect knowledge/something else that humans are sure to use as a weapon and destroy themselves (as the elves almost destroyed themselves forever, learning a harsh but valuable lesson). But here's the Castle Village, a magical settlement on the Continent of Galdora....

Not to say that Castle Village (Stardew Valley Expanded) and Verde Kingdom (Ridgeside Village) have a close relationship, because as I said above, there may be conflicting views between humans and elves and a desire to keep secrets. But considering that Castle Village is a magical place where spells is taught, a haven for monster hunters, and is perfectly fine with other races (like goblins, who usually work for witches, as Henchman said), the elves would make a first step with establishing relations with at least one human settlement.

Truth be told, elves of the Verde Kingdom at first wanted no relationship with humans at all, except justice and harsh punishment for the small group that had kidnapped their newborn princess Undreya. However, thanks to one particular human (aka our Farmer) the princess was found, and Farmer was characterized by the royal guards of the princess as a trustworthy and good-natured person, Undreya considers Farmer a friend, and I'm sure that if there are new events in the future, Farmer will earn the trust of the rulers of the kingdom, and (at least most of) the elves will reconsider their relationship to humans.

The Castle Village residents will naturally be surprised that the elves are still living and thriving, not destroyed by their own weapons, according to the history books, and want to have some contacts. But they will quickly and more or less calmly accept this fact. At least as long as Camilla, the Ministry and the Order are running things, there's nothing to worry about. Well, unusual peaceful (mostly?) neighbors, what's the big deal.

The Ministry of Magic will definitely be most excited, because it is thanks to the elven heritage (remaining ruins, books, scrolls, mana sources) that modern wizards and witches know and use magic as it is. Without help from the past, humans would still be thinking for a long time about, for example, the teleportation spell! Because of that, such an ally would be good. But the Ministry would also be careful, because one wrong move and instead of a potential ally and trading partner they would get an enemy whose power would be equal to that of the entire magical society of humans, if not more, and then no one would be happy. Elves are known for being peaceful, but definitely know how to wage war if they have to.

I also like to think that in such a situation, both settlements will send ambassadors to establish contact and settle disputes, if any. And one of the ambassadors from Castle Village would be... Lance! Because why not - the adventurer is smart and savvy, possesses magic, can stand up for himself, uses words as skillfully as sword and spells, plus his calm character, courage, kindness and aspiration to high things, which the elven rulers will definitely appreciate.

Alesia, as I think, would also be a good ambassador because of the same qualities as Lance, except for magic (and she need to protect the wall of the Castle Village almost 24/7).

As for Camilla, who logically should be the one who build the relationship between the Village and the Elven Kingdom.... I don't think the elves will understand her, uh, sense of humor. But they will definitely respect her magical power, maybe even fear her.

Imagine how many possible ideas and headcanons there are for the NPCs of these two mods and Farmer OC in this story!

....And I apologize if I sound like a crazy person and am writing some nonsense that no one asked, but gosh, imagine how much adventure and chaos there would be if they start trying to create a Castle Village and Verde Kingdom relationship, how many funny moments, how much drama if some group of humans/elves are against it and try to derail everything, how Farmer would have a key role in the story, like IMAGINE-

[schizotrinkets]

Howdy. I’m Mallow Rotwrithe (but I go by "Witch Mallow" or just “Rot”). 25, he/it.

I scream spells into jars, argue with teeth, and cry into my spell ink (it makes it stronger).

I work with goblins. Not over them. They steal my smokes and whisper secrets through mold. I listen.

Sometimes I bite gods on purpose. Sometimes I teach you how.

I don’t do “manifesting.” I do “emotional hoarding until the universe flinches.”

You can call me a prophet (as some of my friends and family do), but I’m mostly just extremely observant and full of mud.

Signature Magick Style: Goblinroot Witchcraft

Powered by scraps, emotions, dirt, and too much feeling

Spells come in the form of: broken jewelry, noisy jars, cursed snacks, screaming

Divination style: pull a card, ignore it, scream, and see what bites back

Beliefs:

Nothing is worthless if you loved it once

Chaos is an ecosystem

Magick should be emotional, embarrassing, and extremely effective

You are allowed to be tender and covered in mud at the same time

Current Status:

Emotionally entangled with a spirit that lives on my mlp toy collection shelf

In an open situationship with a local juniper tree

Collecting names I forgot I gave people

DMs open for:

Trinket & hoard picture trades

Cursed advice

Spells that shouldn't work but do

Rot love letters

Feel free to send asks with thoughts, questions, and requests :]

Online Grimoire Table of Contents & Masterposts:

Introduction to Goblinroot Witchcraft:

What Are Goblins?

Introduction to Goblin Magick

Working With Goblins

Finding Your Goblin Familiar

Building a Goblinroot Deck

Trinketwork Basics

What Is Goblin Hoard Magick?

An Introduction to Rot Whispers (Shroomcraft)

Goblinroot Guide to Safe Cursing and Hexing

Mischief Magick Guide

Guide to Bug Divination and Spellcraft

How to Scream With Magick

Introduction to Dirtcraft

How to Practice Safe & Ethical Necromancy

The Goblinroot Spellbook

Working With Goblins

Goblin and Fae Spirit Familiars

Goblinroot Chaos Deck

Scribble Sigils

Trinketwork & Hoard Magick

Rot Whispers (Shroomcraft)

Screaming Spell Examples

Necro-Goblicon (Minor Necromancy). Source your bones ethically

Bugs Bugs Bugs

Dirtcraft

Goblin Cursecraft and Hexes

Mischief Magick

Luck, Blessings, and Nice Things

Strange Magick

[starsofarda]

Ok, I am following after this brainrot.

Have a ficlet - it's probably what I am gonna do about this whole thing, unfortunately it's the time where I don't have many energies.

And yes, I know that I have other things, but again, low energy. ADHD is being a bitch to me.

I hope you will enjoy my offer <3

PS: I know, language barriers, pls do not ask me to write in actual Elvish. Here's a small legendarium for different languages:

Normal font: Westron

Typed: Legolas specifically with his horrendous Sylvan dialect

Italic: Sindarin

Bold: Khuzdul (underlined if ANCIENT Khuzdul)

Cursive: Quenya

At first it felt like a light trickling of dust and pebbles over him - he didn't bother opening his eyes yet.

He was still grappling with the fact that he was breathing again and that he was not in the peaceful Halls of Mandos anymore.

And then he heard drums.

Drums and hurried footsteps and the skittering of orcs - no, not orcs, goblins.

That was when he decided to open his eyes and free himself from the wall he had been apparently staying.

It took him a short while to get back some of his movement, enough to start walking towards the source of that noise, hoping that once he got there he would have enough strength to just give a hand to whoever was in there - no pun intended, he thought, as he slowly directed himself whilst leaning against the stony walls.

It seemed that he was in a mine - a Dwarven mine, to be exact.

That was when he heard it - the horrible noise of a Balrog - and he knew those fiendish creatures quite well.

He needed to hurry, whoever was in there did not deserve to face any Balrogs of Morgoth.

It took a while for him to catch up.

When he finally did arrive, he was just in time to see as what looked like a Wizard was facing off with the Balrog.

The Wizard was speaking a language unknown to him.

"You cannot pass! I am a servant of the Secret Fire, wielder of the flame of Anor. You cannot pass. The dark fire will not avail you, flame of Udûn. Go back to the Shadow! You cannot pass!"

Alas he was way too far yet, as he hurried as best he could towards the group - he could see a Dwarf, an Elf, two men and four halflings - or children, he really could not distinguish them in such darkness.

As the Wizard was caught by the whip of the Balrog and shouted "Fly, you fools!", he jumped straight next to one of the men, helping him hold the little ones.

Aragorn suddenly saw the presence of probably the tallest Elf he had ever met and with fiery red hair - something he himself had never seen. "What?!" He exclaimed confused.

The red haired Elf just shook his head.

"Let's talk later, once we are out of here."

Aragorn nodded and lead the Fellowship out of Moria, as per plans. There would be time to grieve later on.

Once outside the situation looked grim. The Hobbits were stricken by grief, the Fellowship was lost, and on top of that not onl was Gandalf dead at the hands of a Balrog, but they acquired one more Elf - and what kind of Elf.

Tall, fiery red hair, missing right hand and scarred left hand. Aragorn talked to him.

"We will talk once we are out of orcs' sight."

"Fine by me, Elros."

"... My name is Aragorn. I think you have me confused."

"Oh, sorry. My name is Nelyo."

Aragorn definitely had heard that name before, although he could not pinpoint exactly when, or where. Somehow he was thinking of Elrond, but he would know for certain if Elrond had mentioned that name. In any case, that definitely wasn't the time to linger on issues and thoughts - he would have time to do so once the Fellowship reached Lothlorien.

"Boromir, get the Hobbits up, we need to go!"

"Give them a moment, for pity's sake!"

"By nighttime this place will be crawling with orcs."

Legolas was looking uneasy, something Aragorn picked up immediately. "Yes, we are taking the Elf with us."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Aragorn."

The man stopped. "And why not? He helped us."

"He is a kinslayer."

"As far as I am concerned, this one just came out of the rocks of Moria, if anything I will let the lady of the Galadhrim decide."

Nelyo understood only about half of the conversation - damn, the language did evolve a lot during the time he was in Mandos. He would have to ask someone what had happened in the meantime, but for the moment he stood upand wobbled a little towards two of the halflings, gently patting them and signaling themm it was time to go.

The two latched onto him, as the rest followed the man who introduced himself

By the time they stopped by the river Nimrodel, they finally shifted the attention to "Nelyo", as Aragorn had relayed his name to the rest of the Fellowship.

In the meantime Nelyo had understood that probably speaking Sindarin instead of Quenya would be a better shot. It was Aragorn, once again, that talked to him.

"We are about to enter Lady Galadriel's realm. We are on a secret errand. What can you tell us?"

Nelyo considered his options. Also, the fact that Galadriel had been mentioned meant a 99% of certain death - that would suck, but at least he'd say sorry.

"I think it's probably easier if I speak Sindarin."

"Indeed."

Nelyo braced himself. "My Sinda name is Maedhros. I died... Well, I am not sure, but I died. Somehow I was re-embodied here."

Now, Aragorn definitely had heard the name "Maedhros".

"That's why Legolas here said that you were a kinslayer." He pointed at the blond Elf next to him.

"Indeed. It is probably not a good idea making me go anywhere near Galadriel."

"Agreed." Legolas interjected. "My father and grandfather have told me about ancient Doriath."

Now things started to click for Aragorn. Boromir was looking at everyone with eyes wide open - as much as he understood Sindarin, he was nowhere near fluent, so he would need to ask about the ordeal later on, swallowing at least a bit of his pride.

Maedhros sighed. "I will take my punishment whatever that will be."

That kind of settled things down.

At that point Sam interjected. "Hey, Mr. Nelyo did help us and has been nothing but mindful! Why are you all being mean?!"

"I am afraid, Master Gamgee, that the issue runs deeper than ever. But it is indeed true, maybe the Lady of the Galadhrim will be merciful, given the more pressing matters."

Maedhros was tired, however. Whatever would be his destiny, at least he'd get to see the stars once more - so he thought as Legolas seemed to tell a story and sing.

He kind of went back memory lane, when Maglor used to sing, now only just a memory.

The halflings suddenly latched onto him once again. "See, Merry? Mr. Nelyo Elf was feeling grief too, that's not hard to see!"

"He doesn't look as scary now, Pippin!"

"I never said he was!"

And Maedhros was not understanding a single word of that language, but he surely understood warmth. These halflings truly were like children to him. He made a half smile.

"See? He smiled! Frodo, Sam, he smiled!"

Boromir intervened. "Yes, and now we are all very tired. And orcs are still about. Leave him be.

That pretty much concluded the night. Every problem that still lingered would be resolved by morning.

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

Some friends and I are planning to play a superhero-themed RPG and I'm planning a girl who has limited shapeshifting to give herself features and abilities of aquatic life. Things like octopus camouflage and tentacles, bioluminescence, electric pulses, venomous stingers, etc. And I was curious if you could recommend some really strange and obscure adaptations that could be fun to use, or a source to find information on said strange adaptations :)

Oh you’re in luck, the ocean is full of crazy and cool adaptations of animals! I’m just going to be naming any and all that come to mind in a random order because upon hearing this question I got like a million ideas at once. Stargazer fishes have both electricity impulse-generation ability and venomous spines. Hagfish are a classic, they can secrete tons of super sticky slime. Boxfish can excrete poisons from their skin into the water, and their relatives pufferfishes and porcupinefishes can have several toxins in the skin and organs. Many coldwater deep sea fishes like wolf eels have antifreeze proteins in their blood to survive in the freezing water. Some fishes that sometimes live in low-oxygen environments can respire anaerobically by producing ethanol, for example crucian carps and other carps too I think (goldfish for example). Others have specially evolved swim bladders or highly vascularised tissues in the mouth or have a special derived organ of the gills that can also take in oxygen from the atmosphere to supplement low oxygen, but likely your RPG will take place on land anyway so. Parrotfish have 15 rows of teeth that form a hard beak, the beak is formed from the second strongest biomineral in the world and the parrotfish can scrape rocks and even chew coral with it. The strongest biomineral in the world belongs to chitons, a fellow aquatic mollusk that also scrapes things off of rocks. Cone snails have a venomous harpoon-like radula tooth which they can shoot (their radula “tongue” still attached) at prey and predators alike, paralysing small prey instantly and even killing humans. They even have a radula sac where they store the rest of their radulas, ready for use! Moray eels have a second, tiny pair of jaws that help with grabbing onto prey. Tunas and billfish (and some sharks) can heat up their eyes and brain to gain superior vision while hunting. Also both can change colour — many fishes do in fact. Salmonids can smell their home river while migrating back from the ocean, which requires a phenomenal smelling ability. Besides smell many fish have taste buds all over their bodies, usually focused on any barbels and their faces, like in catfish or sturgeon. Many fishes can sense electricity via ampullae of Lorenzini, famously sharks and paddlefish. Elephantfish sense and communicate with fellow elephantfishes via low frequency electricity. Many fishes have extendable mouths, lips, or jaws, like the goblin shark, slingjaw wrasse and john dory to name a few. Seahorses are ridiculously good predators — though granted, their prey is copepods — that vacuum in their prey through their tubular mouth by jerking back their head. Cuttlefish can cause seizures in their prey by rapidly changing colour. Some squids have teeth in their suckers. Zebrafish can regenerate up to 20% of its heart. Sea stars can regenerate a whole new sea star from a severed arm. Electric eels have their powerful shock, and it is even proposed that they could be able to force their prey out of hiding by generating electricity that moves their muscles.

That’s some that came to mind! And you already mentioned bioluminescence, haha! I named so many things that it’s probably best that you go see more information about each on your own, I think sources are pretty simple to find if you just look up these things with important keywords. Hope this helps!

[rubistella]

plotted starter for @bakrahispul

With the goblins put in their place and the tieflings now orchestrating celebrations to come, all those in camp had taken to the grove for either bartering or resupplying. Word in town was that the halfling Arron, local trader with tenure, had gotten his hands on a fresh new batch of weaponry that had come from the south. Which left Astarion to conclude that their adventure had likely taken place north after landing his eyes on a cape he most definitely wouldn’t have walked past without pilfering off the suspicious-looking corpse of a fellow adventurer.

Speaking of pilferages, one would simply beg to know just how come the pale elf had found himself the lock and key to the winding stairs that led to a secret basement in the grove. It had taken him no time to figure out the puzzle behind it– there wasn’t a door he couldn’t unlock, after all.

Even if it was made of stone with no keyhole attached.

Left to his own devices and with no eyes to keep his fangs in check, the pale elf hummed himself a quiet tune of bardic origin from one Elven Song Tavern back in Baldur’s. Pockets heavy with a pouch of coin he’d have denied to his grave having lockpicked a nearby chest for, and a circlet weaved out of nature’s finest branches that simply thrummed with arcane energy sitting on top of his head. Most beautifully, he’d add– if he could see himself in the mirror, that is.

“Now, what do we have here…” The apollonian lilt in his voice trailed off as a batch of old scraps of letters found themselves from his hold to the makeshift table of cut stone lining the walls. Some torn, others burnt, but piecing what he could of them together was child’s play by comparison to the more complex traps Astarion had found himself disarming of late.And just as the rogue was halfway through deciphering whether that last missing bit meant shadow or meadow, approaching steps echoed off the winding staircase and snapped him right out of his reverie.

Head whiplashed towards the source of sound-- the only entrance, and exit available. Quick to touch index to his tongue, Astarion pinched a nearby candle's wick out and slinked back into the shadows. One hand on the floor, keeping his centre of gravity close to the ground, and the other closed around the grip of his dagger.

[thisuserislilsilly]

Summary: A Tech-priest archeologist in her investigation to find relics from time past only receives a message to the Imperium as a whole.

TW: Spooky (not really)/Drama/My bad depiction on how the Mechanicus talks

Pairings: None

Goblin tag squad: @cardinalcanis @finchly-tintinnabulation @artemisareia @echo-of-damnation @meervalv0 @jaghatai-khock (hopefully THIS TIME THE TAGS WORK-)

He who sees your soul, he who takes humanity or returns thy fear

It had taken the tech-priests months and countless servitors, but the ruins of A-74 had finally been cleared. The ancient planetary outpost gleamed once more, its copper domes and crystalline spires catching the pale sunlight. Magos Delphi surveyed the scene with a mix of pride and anticipation, her augmetic eyes whirring as they took in every detail.

"At last," she intoned, her vox-caster crackling with excitement, "We can begin the real work."

Her team of adepts gathered around, their mechadendrites twitching with eagerness. The secrets of the old ones lay within these halls - miraculous technologies from the Dark Age that could revolutionize the Imperium, or perhaps other secrets that would please the Ommnisiah were bound to be found here, in that long lost human colony.

As they approached the newly unsealed entrance, Delphi felt a surge of optimism. Whatever challenges lay ahead, it had been wroth all of the assets, both human and mechanical, her cohort had thrown at it

The massive adamantium doors groaned open, revealing a cavernous atrium bathed in an eerie blue glow. Delphi and her team cautiously entered, their augmetic senses on high alert. The walls were lined with intricate circuitry patterns that pulsed with an otherworldly energy, and strange symbols flickered across holographic displays, they all looked to be human, resembling the speech and symbol patterns she had seen in other cultures using to communicate; although she despised it, she had been taught in the ways normal “meatbags” spoke with their kind instead of the glorious binary language of the Mechanicum.

As they ventured deeper into the atrium, Delphi's excitement grew. The technology surrounding them was far more advanced than she had dared to hope. Her cogitators whirred furiously, processing the wealth of information before her.

"Adept Gamma," she called out, her voice brimming with enthusiasm, "Begin cataloging these circuit patterns. Adept Beta, analyze those holographic displays. Do not get distracted by your excitement and control those mechandrites"

The adepts acknowledged with binary chirps, their mechanical limbs already extending to interface with the ancient systems. Delphi moved further into the chamber, her own augmetic limbs twitching with anticipation. Her vid-feed was recording every detail, so she could study it at her leisure, and her internal cogitator was already running simulations of the possible technology they might find here.

As she scanned the room, her optical sensors detected movement in the corner. She quickly turned to look, but the source was already gone. It had seemed like a blur of light, flickering in and out of view. She blinked her cybernetic eyes and tried to process what she had just seen. Perhaps this had been just one of the common glitches in her visual input; no, the others had not noticed, and their organic parts would be better suited to detecting such errors.

She shook her head and continued scanning the room, but there was no sign of the strange apparition. As her adepts began to collect data, a low humming filled the air. The sound was strangely hypnotic, and Delphi felt her thoughts drifting. She tried to concentrate, but the humming was growing louder. Her limbs felt heavy, and her head was starting to throb, she felt numb to all around her, the excitement fleeting and the whole experience seemed surreal, as if it was happening to someone else.

The adepts were unaffected by the sound, their cybernetics shielding them from the influence. They continued their work, oblivious to anything that could had been going wrong.

"DATA. RETRIEVED. COMMENCING IMPUTATION. INPUT. PENDING."

"Adept, you are experiencing a glitch in your audio input," She heard herself say, her own voice sounding distant and muffled.

"COGNITIVE FUNCTIONS. IMPAIRED. ASSESSMENT. POSSIBILITY. 78%. POSSIBILITY. AUDIO-SPATIAL. ILLOGICAL RESPONSE, PROCEEDING TO IGNORE"

The adept's voice was flat and emotionless, but Delphi could sense the confusion and worry.

"DATA. CATALOGUED. STORAGE. PENDING."

"Adept. Cease cataloging. Initiate. Diagnostic protocols. Assess. Possibility. Data corruption."

"DIAGNOSTIC. PENDING."

She could feel her systems shutting down, her mind struggling to stay focused. The hum was deafening now, drowning out everything else.

"Adept. Report. Diagnostics."

"DIAGNOSTIC. COMPLETE. SYSTEMS. NOMINAL. DATA. UNAFFECTED. ASSESMENT, TECH-PRIEST SPEWING ILLOGICAL ORDERS, RETURNING TO ORIGINAL INSTRUCTIONS"

The adept turned its attention back to the circuits, ignoring Delphi. She could only watch as her team was slowly taken over by the humming, their movements becoming sluggish and uncoordinated.

She fought to regain control of her body, her cybernetics resisting the strange influence. She was the head of this expedition, the leader of these adepts, yet she felt the most human she had been before her discarding of her flesh; now the numbness of limbs long replaced by augmentations were still there, even the sensation of a beating heart that her new organs had replaced.

Her head was throbbing now, her thoughts clouded and confused. The humming was unbearable, a constant, relentless drone that pierced through her. She tried to move, but her limbs were unresponsive.

"INPUT. PENDING"

She could only watch helplessly as her team continued their work, oblivious to their leader's predicament.

"TECH-PRIEST NOT RESPONDING, PROCEEDING WITHOUT AUTHORIZAAAAAA-" The Vox audio of the adept experienced lag as it's mechandrite plugged in a server full of data only to be rejected by the machine, shocked and left it on the ground wailing it's limbs trying to stand up, to comedic failure.

The rest of the adepts stopped and began to scan the area, noticing a sudden change, the air around them becoming cold, and the lights dimming.

"TECH-PRIIISSTT. H-ELP." One of the adepts managed to say before freezing completely.

"INITIATING. C-CONTA-AMB-MENT. MEASURES." The Adept who was the closest to the server tried to reach for something, but failed to do so as his entire body froze.

"WARNING. C-CORRUPT-ION. DETECTED." Another Adept managed to say before succumbing to the cold.

"INPUT. PENDING" The rest of the Adepts said at once, their voices blending together into an unearthly cacophony "WHY DO I FEEL!?!?!?! WHY I FEEL NUMB!?!?!? WHERE AM I?!?!? WHAAAA-"

Their votes spit out for a moment, their mechanic implanted eyes opening wide with a scarily human emotion before the circuits kicked in and returned them to the blank faces the Mechanicus had designed.

Delphi could only watch in horror as her team was consumed by the strange phenomenon, her body still paralyzed.

The air around them became colder, and the blue lights started to flicker. The humming grew louder, and Delphi could feel a strange presence in the room.

She struggled against the paralysis, her mind racing. This was not a natural phenomenon, this was some sort of sentient being, a creature that was capable of manipulating their bodies and minds. She needed to stop it, or else her whole team would be lost.

She focused on her cybernetics, willing them to obey her. She could feel the paralysis slowly loosening, and her limbs began to move.

The humming was deafening now, a high-pitched drone that made her head ache. She gritted her teeth and pushed through the pain, her legs finally moving.

She stumbled towards the source of the hum, her vision blurred. The blue lights were flashing wildly now, and she could see a shadow, a figure much larger than anything she had ever laid eyes on before, hovering above the ground, a dark, ominous mass, with red glowing eyes intently staring directly at her.

"TECH-PRIEST"

"INITIATING. C-CONTA-AMB-MENT. PROTOCOLS"

"WHAAAA-"

"AID. DEMAND."

The Adepts had begun to move again, their bodies twitching and spasming as the strange presence approached slowly, floating just above the ground, the sound growing louder and louder, filling the room with its incessant hum, the red glowing eyes piercing through the darkness.

"WHAT IS THAT?"

"AID. REQUEST."

"REPAIR. ME. NOW"

"ASSESTMENT. FUCK. THE. FLESH"

"PLEASE. HELP. US."

"WHAT. ARE. YOU? WHAT. AM. I?"

"DATA. CORRUPTED. PLEA. SEEK. REPAIR."

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING"

"PLEA. DATA. CORRUPTED"

"I CAN'T UNDERSTAND YOU."

The voices of the adepts snapped back and forth between human-like and their mechanical selves, their minds struggling to comprehend the strange being that was approaching them.

The presence was almost upon them, its eyes blazing and its body pulsing with energy. The hum was overwhelming, and Delphi could feel the air growing colder. She knew she had to act now, or they would all be lost.

The tech-priest flashed a light to the adepts, a series of binary code.

"FOCUS. ON. ME. WE. NEED. TO. EXIT. NOW."

The Adepts were struggling to understand the words, their minds reeling from the effects of the presence. They turned towards Delphi, their eyes wide and terrified.

Delphi grabbed the Adept closest to her and pulled him towards the exit, the others following behind. Through the way back, Delphi realized what the outpost truly was; there were old rusted Aquilas in the walls, chambers so big only those of the Adeptus Astartes would be able to use, plugs and connections fitted to store power armor and equipment, this was a Fortress-Monastery, of a Chapter, perhaps even a Legion long forgotten by time.

The Presence was gaining on them, its eyes glowing and its hum growing louder. Delphi and the Adepts fled through the halls, their feet pounding against the cold metal floors. The presence was close behind, its hum growing louder and louder. They saw the exit where they had blown that building, salvation was at their reach, but they were not alone.

A dozen servitors were waiting for them outside, their bodies twisted and malformed. Their eyes were vacant, and their mouths were open in silent screams. They were reaching out to Delphi and the Adepts, their fingers grasping and clawing. Their own servitors, by some inexplicable reason, were able to feel, just like Delphi and her adepts had experienced before the Presence made itself known,

Delphi pushed past the servitors, their bodies crumbling to the floor. The presence was close behind.

The adepts followed Delphi, their bodies trembling. The presence was nearly upon them, but the shuttle to leave was even closer. As she boarded the few servitors and adepts that weren't yet in the ground spitting oil from it's orifices and repeating binary code over and over, Delphi got to see who the Presence had been in the dim light of the night sky.

An imposing figure, who at the moment had only really been strolling to catch up rather than chasing them at full speed, completely bald, pale and with those piercing red eyes that seemed to look directly into Delphi soul. She knew it had been the cause of the malfunctions, of the disconnections, the king amongst the forgotten and abandoned Fortress-Monastery; slowly and steadily it raised it's arms forward, hands open as if it was pleading; it's mouth was closed, his eyebrows neutral, the entire face did not reflect even a sliver of emotion going through that body standing there, unmoving, silent.

As Delphi backed up to the shuttle, the humming and strange phenomenon in her body began to fade, it was as if she was out of the radius of "that presence". It was the entity who had made them feel that way just by being near, she assessed that it was more than likely the entity wasn't even aware of those reactions to its presence. As the shuttle door slid close, Delphi heard "It" speak in a rumbling voice it pierced the metal now separating it from the tech-priest cohort.

"I see the past and the future. Go, tech-priest; say what you have seen. Tell the other's, the Imperium of Man, that Neran sees and hears them once again"

[alchemist-whisper]

Oh, my starry-eyed gossip goblins! 🌟✨

Your favorite bewildered fortune-teller is back after Grammy energy and... my my!

Now, where were we before all this delightful chaos? adjusts my turquoise and orange-embroidered shawl while stirring the golden flames in my cauldron Ah yes! Let's return to our regularly scheduled mystical mischief!

As I always say while brewing my most focused potions: even the most enchanting distractions must give way to our magical agenda! ✨

And back with some piping hot cosmic tea! Grab your tarot cards and put on your detective hats, because we're diving deep into the mystical world of Taylor Swift's "loml" (that's "love of my life" for those who haven't cracked the Swiftie code yet).

The burning question on everyone's lips: Is this enchanting tune about our tall, blonde, and fabulous friend Karlie? Well, my dears, the cards have spoken, and they're spilling more tea than a clumsy witch at a celestial café!

Let's see what the universe whispered to us:

25 (The Ring) 💍: Ooh, commitment alert! Looks like this song's about someone who's got Taylor's heart on lockdown.

5 (The Tree) 🌳: Roots deeper than Taylor's song lyrics? Check! This relationship's been growing for seasons, darlings.

12 (The Birds) 🐦: Tweet tweet! There's more to this story than meets the eye (or ear). Secret messages, anyone?

Put it all together, and what do we get? A cosmic cocktail that screams "Kaylor" louder than a banshee at a karaoke night!

The Ring and The Tree are practically slow dancing together, telling us this is about a long-term, deeply rooted connection. (Sound like anyone we know? *wink wink*) And those Birds? They're chirping about complex communication and hidden meanings. Classic Taylor, am I right?

Now, I'm not saying it's definitely about Karlie... but if this were a game of Clue, I'd be slapping down my cards and yelling "Karlie Kloss, in the recording studio, with a heartfelt ballad!"

Remember, my little stardust sprinkles, Mama Swift works in mysterious ways. This could all be an elaborate ruse to throw us off the scent. Or maybe... just maybe... we've cracked the code!

Either way, keep those ears perked and those third eyes wide open. The next clue could be hiding in plain sight!

Stay cosmic, my lovelies! ✨🔮

Yours in eternal perplexity,

Alchemist Whisper

ps.: If you see me frantically scribbling notes at the next Taylor Swift concert, no you didn't! A fortune-teller never reveals her sources... unless Mercury is in retrograde, of course! 😉🤫

ps².: Chappell Roan, sweetheart, you can always be at my sacred chamber 🫢