#stream recaps with bex

[bex-draws-things]

todays skizz stream

oh my oh my oh my ohhhhhh myyyyy

we got

skizz hotguys hotguy himself with NON INVERTED mouse!

impulse had a multiple piercings including a NIPPLE PIERCING and shares some interesting stories about THAT experience

overall too much talking about nipples for the average person

impulse saying they should be vigilantes (DDVAU fans rejoice) (also the timestamp in the vod is 2:35:35)

etho used to work for home depot specifically with the carpet displays and he now has a large collection of carpets (rugs) that he gives as wedding gifts

gem checking out of the conversation but then they start talking about haboobs (a type of dust storm) and gem just goes "BOOBS?" (https://www.twitch.tv/geminitay/clip/ObliqueComfortableBatteryAllenHuhu-MbcyHICh66Y4xg69?filter=clips&range=7d&sort=time <- heres the link to the clip from gems POV because i cannot articulate the perfection of this moment)

MATURE STREAM moment when they continue to talk about haboobs (https://www.twitch.tv/skizzleman/clip/EnthusiasticSneakyTireJKanStyle-i6WsnyXpPUWDHZhw?filter=clips&range=7d&sort=time)

EDIT because how the HECK DID I FORGET THE FACT THAT scar came back in his season 7 HEP skin when gem suggested changing the shape of the river

and then they planted mycelium and started chanting "spread the spores"

thank you for coming to my ted talk

[lgbtyrus]

Andi Mack Reunion Live Stream Mini Recap:

-Tyrus is still endgame and had the most perfect wedding ever

-Ambi is canon

-Kippen siblings is canon

-Luke did the rap apology that TJ sang to Buffy and still knew 95% of it

-They said there was basically an entire episode that got deleted where Bex went on a date with someone and Andi was NOT okay with it.

-They all said they'd return for a reunion- Asher the first to say yes.

-They watched a Lemon Boy edit together and Asher said it was a "beautiful edit" and Trent said it was made by a genius and he teared up

-Emily said "Amber loves lesbians"

-The cast sang the theme song acapella 🥺❣️

-Asher had originally said "no" to playing Jonah because he wouldn't play frisbee and they auditioned many more guys until they were like "fuck it let's teach him frisbee"

-Emily had auditioned for Andi but since they had locked in on giving Peyton the role of Andi, they wrote in Amber for Emily specifically 😭 It was because her agent called the producers to say, "We know she messed up the audition, but she'd really like to try again." And after this, Terri knew they had to write in Amber for her.

-They also wrote Iris for Molly

-Terri Minski said Luke's hair was a character in itself. They had told Terri that Luke was an Evangelist Christian, so she took Luke and his parents to lunch to talk about it because she was stressed out because TJ was going to be gay. She had told Luke and his parents what was happening and they cried, and she was so nervous, and they told her that they were so honored. Luke said he thought he was going to get fired because he only shot one episode and didn't understand why he was being taken to lunch.

-The guy whose audition video played before Trent's got the part for 20 seconds before Terri saw Trent's audition

-Terri said Lilan wore the weirdest audition outfit ever, and it was her good luck outfit.

-Terri called them "lighting in a bottle" because she's not sure she'll ever get someone as special as this cast together again

-Tyrus was NOT supposed to be canon, but they shot the scenes anyways. They had said, "We gave you one gay character, we're not going to give you TWO." But they fought hard for it, and they found allies that allowed it to happen.

-Disney is still saying that they are looking for the "new Andi Mack" and Terri is adamant that they already have it, and she would love more than anything to bring the cast back together again for a spin off

-Terri had wanted Andi to repeat the cycle LMAO. AKA, teen pregnancy. Disney said, "NO WAY!"

Here is a pic of the stream before Josh and Trent had to leave! Terri left after a few more questions, too.

DJ Fruity Live Performance

-Younger fans would see Emily and scream "Amber alert!" and run

-Luke uses an Andi Mack journal as his personal diary

-Bi Bex Canon. Lilan said something along the lines of: Did you not see the clothes she'd wear? Of course she's bi.

-They played a behind the scenes clip of the Tyrus bench scene. I screen recorded, but THERE IS LAG. I'm sure there is a better video out there, but here is this for now.

-Luke and Josh wrote an episode of Andi Mack where a blackout happens in Shadyside and nobody can use their phone. Everyone is forced to go outside. But they were too scared to pitch it so nothing ever came of it. They also wrote an outline for an Andi Mack movie.

It was an extremely long live stream, and they were entertaining and funny the entire time. They were able to raise $20k for the families affected by the LA fires, and you can still donate here if you'd like it's live for another week as of now, 1/26/25. I missed them and the Andi Mack magic so much. I hope they do this again in the future.

[wookgerine]

2023 kpop recap!

tagged by @28reas0ns and @zuhoz !

groups you started stanning: you know who it is 😌 weishenv came in the last two months of the year and obliterated everything else. but also lessera and cravity. idk maybe that was last year the passage of time is not real to me. oh fromis_9 for sure this year tho

new ult biases: wayv will be included in every answer so now that we have established that - yangyang

idol(s) who got most of your simping: courtesty of li <3

most streamed groups: wayv, onlyoneof, cravity, wjsn, shinee

most streamed soloists: taemin, jonghyun, woodz, sunmi

top songs of the year: can i include the entire on my youth album.... and unlock my world... umm satellite by shinee, baddie by cravity, and kick it 4 now by tnx are some

top debut(s) of the year: riize bc they made the icon talk saxy and because i have no idea who else debuted this year <3

choreographies you learned: against my own desire - queencard. also attempted to start birthday by ten but that was like dec 31st or something. a tiny bit of super yuppers by wjsn chocome

albums/merch you bought: only thing I've bought is albums

new kpop mutual(s) you made: recently umm vinnie, wwill, bex, and nini

Tagging @taegyunie @luvrli @wayvmp3 if you would like to do it!

[monriatitans]

Ta-Da! List: Monday - 12/25

I have decided to make a “Ta-Da! List” every day! There won’t be TMI.

Don’t know what a “Ta-Da! List” is? To learn more, check out @adhdjesse‘s book Extra Focus here.

– (throughout the day) made emails more manageable by deleting some – shared the Dec. 24th Ta-Da! List to IG – took a selfie wearing a Christmas gift and sent it to the gifter, who then called and said they loved their presents and asked if we liked the peanuts they, also, sent; Fun Fact: Virginia is the peanut capital of the world – using a gifted Bookshop.org Gift Card from mom, bought “If You Could See the Sun” by Ann Liang and “Sensory: Life on the Spectrum: An Autistic Comics Anthology” by Bex Ollerton – on Steam, featured the 2023 Recap – using a gifted Amazon Gift Card, and an affiliate link, bought a new photo album – finished sharing the Dec. 24th Ta-Da! List – unpinned the O&T Stream Announcement, then added its link to the SITE MAP

Well, these are all the updates I had for today! Thank you for reading!

May every decision you make be *in the spirit of fairness* and may the rest of your day *NOT go to $#!7*!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Please consider supporting through Buy Me a Coffee or the tip page! Like what you see? Click here to subscribe for updates! For more about MonriaTitans, click here! Watch MonriaTitans on Twitch and YouTube! The images were made in Canva!

[tjkiahgb]

Episode Recap: 3.18, “Something to Talk A-Boot”

I got sent this almost immediately after people were able to stream the episode last night:

First of all, thank you, anon, for thinking of me.

But also, honestly? This entire episode feels like it was written specifically for me. TJ Kippen being a hashtag good boi? Check. A bunch of Tyrus scenes? Check. A couple of random, nonsense plots that I could make jokes about for days? Check and check!

The episode starts with Andi, Jonah, and Cyrus hanging out, waiting for Buffy.

Andi is dressed like she just walked out of a punk show in 1970s London for some reason.

Cyrus says Buffy’s on her way. She’s coming from an appointment. Andi’s like, but she’s not doing her hair until next week and Cyrus notes that she just had her teeth cleaned.

Jonah notes how they seem to know everything about Buffy and they’re like, yeah, we do.

And then Buffy comes hobbling over on crutches and with her foot in a boot and Andi and Cyrus look around in confusion.

So it’s that level of closeness where you know someone’s entire schedule but don’t pay attention to them complaining about their foot pain for weeks or notice them badly limping around places.

They ask her questions about this mystery injury. Buffy explains it’s a stress fracture she got because she tried to run a marathon on a dare.

Jonah asks her if she’s going to be able to still play basketball and Buffy’s like, yes...

And Jonah’s like, “Oh you know what I meant.”

At school the next day, Buffy walks the long way through the football field to class, when TJ shows up in a golf cart like an angel sent from the country club.

Buffy wants to know what he’s doing. He tells her he’s there to give her a ride to class, since apparently Jefferson offers no assistance to injured students.

“Can we offer a way to help incapacitated students get around the campus easier?” asks one of the teachers. “So they don’t risk further injury?”

“No, sorry,” says Metcalf, staring at rows and rows of hundreds of white rabbits locked in cages, each one labelled with the name of a student currently attending Jefferson. “There’s just no room in the budget.”

Buffy tells him how it stinks she hurt herself right before the last game of the season and now she can barely get around. So, he tells her, get in the golf cart already so he can get her to class. She does.

Making sure she uses a seatbelt on a vehicle that’s going no more than four miles per hour? I mean, talk about good behavior.

Later at the Spoon, Buffy talks about how far TJ has come. He used to be the worst but now he’s the best and, really, that’s like as far as you can go. That’s the whole span.

Cyrus is like, lemme just take this modeling pose...

...and put another point up on the scoreboard for the ol’ C-dog.

Behind them, Amber comes and dumps some girl’s food on the counter.

Andi notices and says it seems like Amber’s still struggling because she’s being a terrible waitress, but not in the normal way that she’s a terrible waitress.

Jonah’s like, you think this is my fault? Buffy’s like, I don’t think it’s an existential crisis. Jonah’s like, huh?

Well, sure, it could be that, but, if you’re not feeling artistic, it could also just be locking yourself in a dark room for several hours and crying. It could manifest a lot of different ways! Don’t limit your existential crises.

Amber comes over and asks to talk to Jonah.

Jonah apologizes for doing a bad job of breaking up but Amber doesn’t want to go back over all of that. She just wants one thing from Jonah: for him to leave. Don’t come to The Spoon because it makes her sad to see him.

And now it’s costing her money!

Jonah says he’ll go then. Amber says he won’t have to be gone for long, but also can’t really put a time frame on when he can come back.

I wonder how the owners of The Spoon are going to feel when they learn one of their waitresses banned a frequent customer from eating at their establishment.

Jonah tells the GHC that Amber needs some space, so he gathers his things and heads out into the cold.

At Bex’s, Bex and Bowie watch something funny on a really old TV.

It looks like one of those old microwave-sized boxy TVs with antennas and dials and everything from like the 1960s. One of these things:

The kind that’s technically a color TV, but only like four colors, and most of them have a brown tint. The kind that’s so grainy it looks like you’re watching everything through a coffee filter. The kind that emits the constant low-hum of radiation to let you know it’s working.

Where did they even find something like this? It’s older than they are. And how does it still work? I want to say this is the kind of thing you only find at your grandma’s house, but even grandmas got rid of this outdated scrap 30 years ago.

Also, why?!

I’m not exaggerating when I say nowadays there are literally thousands of better options for entertainment than stacking a bunch of tray tables on top of one another and putting a 10 inch screen, piece of junk on top. What point are they trying to prove?

Anyway, Andi’s upset, and not just because she lives with a couple of weirdos. She finished her application to SAVA but she doesn’t know if she’s going to submit it. She’s worried she might not be one of the small group who gets accepted. She asks Bex what she thinks.

Andi’s like, EXCUSE ME?!

Andi wanted her to say that she was talented and that she believed in her. Bex is like, of course I believe that! Haven’t I said that to you like hundreds of times? Andi’s like, well, you didn’t say it in the last thirty seconds so do you really??

Andi gets up to leave. Bex is like, hey, if they don’t accept you, it’s because they’re wrong and dumb! Andi’s like, OH SO YOU DON’T THINK THEY’RE GOING TO ACCEPT ME!?

Bex is taking a beating like a boxer on the ropes here. It’s like, why is everything I’m saying wrong?! PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO SAY SO YOU DON’T GET MAD AT ME!

Bex says she wasn’t saying Andi wouldn’t get in.

Andi leaves.

Bowie’s gotta be sitting there going, “Boy, I made the right decision to just not say anything.”

He asks Bex why she didn’t just tell Andi she’ll get in.

It’s a tough line to toe. You want to be realistic with your children, and not set them up for an emotionally crushing blow by telling them “Get all your hopes up! Nothing can hurt you!” but you also don’t want to damage their self-esteem. You can see Bex battling with the nuance of the issue.

Or, as Andi would’ve heard it:

At school the next day, Cyrus finds TJ out on the bleachers. TJ’s been summoned to Student Court, which is where a group of students figure out your punishment for a wrongdoing.

Mr. Bag is forcing TJ to go because TJ took his beverage transportation machine.

Cyrus is like, but you were just being a hashtag good boi! And TJ’s like, I know! And now I’m being hashtag persecuted for it!

Cyrus, seeing an injustice, decides he’s going to be TJ’s lawyer. TJ tries to tell him that’s not a thing, but Cyrus is like, too late! Train’s already left the station! I’m off to steam my lawyer suit. And he leaves.

TJ watches him like, “Uh oh, maybe I gave him too much confidence.”

Andi, meanwhile, debates with herself as she stares at the SAVA website.

Okay, I mean, in fairness to Bex, Andi’s awards are first place at a “Sew and Show”(?) and an honorable mention at the County Fair, so, you know, I wouldn’t say she’s a lock to get in.

Also, I like SAVA’s go big or go home attitude. There’s no save progress button. Submit your application or delete the entire thing and get out. Don’t waste our time with half-measures!

Jonah stops by to terrify Andi.

For old times’ sake.

She slams her laptop closed. He asks her what she was working on but she doesn’t want to say yet. She just says she has to make a decision.

Jonah’s like, don’t say the d-word around me. You know I hate that word.

Andi explains how she doesn’t want to say what it is because it might not happen, and she doesn’t want to open up to people about something personal like this, something that she’s so unsure about. And then she’s like, but I guess you couldn’t possibly have any idea what I’m talking about, JONAH BECK.

Jonah’s like, actually, that’s been my life for three years now so...

Andi’s like, okay, without me telling you any details, what should I do?

Jonah says this is making her tense and nervous, so forget about it.

Andi’s like, really? Jonah’s like, yeah, don’t do anything you have trepidation about. Andi’s like, sounds good to me.

Lemme just warn you, kids, following this advice is going to severely confine how you’re able to move through the real world. The real world is nothing but things that stress you out.

Andi thanks Jonah for helping her out and tells him to go.

Jonah’s whole storyline this episode is about people telling him to leave places.

Jonah heads off. Andi opens up her laptop and finds...

...that conversation was all for naught. Honestly, this is what you get for asking Jonah for advice.

Buffy meets with Kaitlin. Kaitlin sees her broken foot and goes, welp, guess that’s it then. We have no chance to win our last game, which she sees as a shame because they were getting so close.

Question: where is she getting this hope from? Last time we saw the team, they were in such shambles that Andi had to play and they lost so badly, they had to resort to celebrating just being alive. Good for her though, for keeping the faith.

Buffy says they still have a shot, that the team is light years better than it was before. I guess that happened off-screen. Either that, or I guess it’s like saying you’re light years better now at driving a car than when you were a newborn. When you start at the bottom, there’s nowhere to go but up.

Plus, Buffy adds, she made a playbook.

Like, yeah, she’s been trying to teach them plays for months and they just kept running into each other, but now that it’s in graph form? How could they not succeed?

Kaitlin’s not feeling it. She doesn’t understand all these complicated dots and arrows and it won’t matter because it’ll never replace having Buffy on the court anyway.

At the trial of TJ Kippen, Gus calls the court to order.

I have to know, how in the world did Gus end up a judge? Who looked at Gus and thought, “There’s a guy who’s got his stuff in order, let’s put him in a position of power.”

Cyrus comes running to the stage, pulling several boxes of files behind him. TJ asks him what all of that is and Cyrus says evidence, but then he’s like...

Where do you even get phone books, plural, in 2019? There’s gotta be a store in Shadyside that’s just called Retro Junk and it sells things like 1960s TVs and phone books and only the characters on this show are keeping them in business.

Cyrus says it doesn’t matter because it’s an intimidation tactic anyway. He’s come to fight to make sure TJ’s not kicked off the basketball team.

Cyrus announces himself as TJ’s defense council. Gus is like, is that a thing? Let me consult with my voiceless co-judges.

Gus’s co-judges voicelessly agree to allow it. Gus says TJ is here to answer for his crime of “Grand Theft Golf Cart.”

Gus asks him to explain himself, so TJ and Cyrus launch into his defense, which boils down to this: he saw someone in need and he did something hashtag good because that’s who he is as a person, and, really, isn’t the real crime here that the school was going to punish an injured child for not being able to drag herself across campus in an unreasonable amount of time? How could any morally conscious person just sit idly by and let that happen?

Gus feels he and his co-judges have heard everything they needed to hear, but Cyrus disagrees. He thinks they all need to hear from a key witness: Cyrus Goodman. Cyrus grills himself.

Gus asks him to speed it up but TJ’s like, I think we have to let this play out.

Then, as his defense attorney continues to argue with himself, TJ tries to come to peace with the fact he’s going to jail.

At Buffy’s house, Buffy hangs out in her room when there’s a knock at the door.

It’s the entire girls’ basketball team.

They were wandering the neighborhood together and wanted to celebrate a season of losing all their games before they lose their last game and then don’t want to celebrate losing all their games anymore. I know that sounds like nonsense but I just described the line of thinking perfectly.

Buffy doesn’t like that attitude as the team’s captain, but as a human being, sitting in the room with baked goods mere inches from her, she agrees to the party.

At Bex’s, Bowie tells Bex he found a postcard from SAVA in the mail.

They both get excited that she applied and she’s going after her dreams. Bex also thinks it’s great that she didn’t accidentally crush Andi’s hopes for the future.

They realize Andi didn’t tell them because she didn’t want them to know she applied, so Bex makes Bowie put the postcard back in the mailbox.

Back at Buffy’s, Kaitlin brings her computer by and asks who wants to watch videos of their old games. She says they’re hilarious. I don’t know about that. Entertaining maybe, in the way that videos of building implosions are entertaining.

They agree to watch the videos. Kaitlin pulls one up of her shooting a free throw in which she legit closes her eyes for a full two minutes before shooting.

Kaitlin’s like, ugh, I’m so terrible and I DON’T KNOW WHY!

Buffy, using all the knowledge and experience she’s picked up from her time as both a basketball player and coach, says hold on, I think I know what the problem is.

She makes her go back and look at the footage again.

OH?! YOU THINK?! COULD THAT POSSIBLY BE IT?! YOU CAN’T PLAY BASKETBALL WITH YOUR EYES CLOSED?!?!?

I’m screaming. This isn’t some subtle thing only a master of the sport would notice like, oh, you’re not lining your feet up right or you’re letting go with your guiding hand too early.

She shut her eyes!

For a long time! Like she’s trying to will herself to sleep.

She shut them before she even looked at the basket to aim for it! What did she think was going on?! When things went pitch black?!

“Okay, so, I’m holding the ball and want to shoot it into the basket. Then things go dark and when the lights come back, I’ve missed the shot. Just what in the world is going on here? Who keeps turning out the lights on me?”

How has this gone on the entire season? Better question, how is Kaitlin able to feed herself? How is she functioning in every day society? There are plants with better problem-solving skills.

Buffy guarantees Kaitlin if she just OPENS HER EYES TO PLAY BASKETBALL, her game will improve.

Then she tells Maria that she’s great at getting open, but that she never calls out to her teammates to let them know.

Buffy’s like, you have to use your voice, Maria.

And Maria’s like...

Lesson learned.

Buffy tells the girls they are better than they think. They can win if they fight for it.

Also, if they don’t shut their eyes for the majority of the game. Fight and keep your eyes open. 1a and 1b.

The girls agree and Buffy hands out her playbooks.

At the game, Buffy pumps up the team.

Armed with confidence and the newfound knowledge that being able to see what you’re doing vastly improves your chances at successfully doing it, the Spikes put up a fight.

Buffy coaches from the sidelines.

You know, I appreciate the wordplay of the “See you in court” sign that that girl is holding, and how it plays into the other storyline of the episode, but, honestly, who is that sign for? Which team wants that? Is that pro-Spikes or pro-Spartans or just... pro-basketball? Pro-wordplay? Does she just want one of the players on the court to see the sign and go, “Huh.” and give her a polite nod or something? What was the goal here?

Buffy continues to coach.

I’d say that’s over-coaching, but there’s a decent chance Kaitlin forgot between the sleepover and the game what the problem was.

The game nears to a close. Maria gets open and does some clapping, but doesn’t really call out to her teammates like Buffy told her to.

Half-credit, I guess. Light years improvement.

Speaking of credit, let’s give some to this loyal group of Spartan fans behind Maria, who show up to every game and sit in their same lucky seats, and wear their same lucky exact outfits.

Because they were there for the last Spartans/Spikes game, too.

You know what, if I had a cool shirt that just said “Weird” on it, I’d probably wear it all the time. I get it.

Anyway, Maria gets the pass and Buffy delivers her best bit of coaching advice yet.

Again, I don’t know that that’s over-coaching. That might be the exact right level of coaching for this team.

Maria’s shot goes in and the Spikes finally win a game. They all celebrate with Buffy.

Then Buffy’s friends storm the court and celebrate with her.

And credit to the girl who’s still waving the pro-Spartans sign even though the game ended several minutes ago. Keep up the spirit.

TJ’s phone buzzes. The court reached a verdict, so he and Cyrus run off to the theater.

Gus has TJ stand so he can read the verdict, and what he and his co-judges have verdicted is:

Cyrus doesn’t take it well.

Or, in other words, this is a KANGAROO COURT!

TJ tells Cyrus to stop fighting. He tells Cyrus he did his best, which... ehhh...

He kept his eyes open at least.

Gus sentences TJ to the harshest punishment allowed by Student Court:

TJ and Cyrus are surprised, but Gus explains they have very little actual authority.

So, wait, if they don’t really have the ability to hand out any kind of actual punishment, why even bother? If you can’t accomplish anything, then let him walk, otherwise you guys are just being jerks and ruining TJ’s lunch.

TJ grabs Cyrus’s shoulder.

I... think that was just supposed to be a joke about prison but... my God that got gay in a hurry.

Gus says court is adjourned and he and the other judges head off to return their robes to the choir while TJ and Cyrus hug.

This whole plot was silly. So so silly.

And I loved every second of it.

Jonah waits for Amber outside The Spoon. Amber spots him and she’s like, I thought I said to get! Scram! He’s like wait, don’t pepper spray me! I just want to tell you something. His dad got a new job and his parents rented a new apartment, which they’re moving into next week.

Amber says that’s great and she’s really glad for him.

Jonah says she really helped him through this tough time. She says he was there for her, too. Before he leaves, Amber offers to get him a milkshake. Not an invite back into The Spoon, mind you. Just a milkshake to go. The Spoon is still off-limits.

Back at school, Cyrus walks out when TJ shows up with another stolen golf cart like a demon sent from the country club.

Cyrus is like, did you learn nothing from your trial? TJ says he lives on the edge. Cyrus says he lives in the middle.

Cyrus gets in and he and TJ drive around the school with gay abandon.

I can’t believe I’m watching a gay teen romcom on the Disney Channel.

At Bex’s, Bex and Bowie spot Andi coming home, so they get in position to play it cool by turning on the TV and putting on one of their weird shows.

“It’s hideous!”

They ask Andi how her day was, hoping to hear about SAVA, but then Andi only tells them about the Spikes game and walks off.

Bex is shaken. Bowie tells her that’s okay. It’s the way it is. Kids don’t tell their parents everything.

Bex is like, yeah, I guess I just thought we were different.

The episode ends with Bex dealing with her greatest fear: she’s becoming her mother.

[illbeyourreasonwhy]

So Much I Think It Must Be...

Chapter 10: Out

Andi took a deep breath and sat on the edge of the couch, trying to work out what to do from here. She had taken a decision. She was going to tell her parents.

As soon as her mind stopped feeling like it was on fire.

*

Chapter 10 of my Ambi Enemies to Friends to Lovers fic! You can read it on ao3 here and from the beginning here. Hope you like it!

*

“Is movie night over already?”

Andi ignored Bex’s question, putting her coat down and pacing.

“Hey, is everything okay?”

“Everything is fine,” Andi said forcefully, rushing into the kitchen to avoid more questions.

“Okay, uh – there’s leftover pizza in the fridge if you’re hungry,” Bowie’s voice called from the living room.

Andi knew they could tell something was up, but figured they would leave her alone for now, which she was grateful for. She kept pacing around the kitchen, chewing mechanically on pizza, and trying to get her mind to shut up.

She liked girls. Okay.

It wasn’t that big a shock. She had been questioning it for a while now. But there was something about realising it was true…

She liked girls. Did that mean she was bisexual? She really had liked Jonah… she thought… But it had felt different than this, than an all-encompassing and consuming stream of thoughts, this pure yearning tugging at her, digging into her and wanting, wanting… wanting what, exactly? She was freaking out too much to understand.

She made her way to her room, sitting on her bed and trying to mute the constant buzzing in her brain.

She needed to keep busy.

She took a shower. She changed into fresh pyjamas. She ate a yoghurt.

Then she went back to the living room. Bex was sitting in the corner of the couch, a book in her lap, and offered her a small smile.

Andi took a deep breath and sat on the edge of the couch, trying to work out what to do from here. She had taken a decision. She was going to tell her parents.

As soon as her mind stopped feeling like it was on fire.

 *

“Where’s Bowie?”

“In the shower. He went after you.” Bex cocked her head, concerned. “Is everything okay?”

Andi nodded, her mouth suddenly dry.

For the next ten minutes she sat in silence, her mom occasionally shooting her worried looks over her book, trying to get the words out. She played with her sleeve, fidgeting as she tried to work up the courage to say the words tumbling in her head. She was terrified, more terrified than she could ever remember. Of course she thought her parents were going to accept her – this was Bex and Bowie she was talking about, the most accepting people she knew, and after everything they went through this should be nothing – but what if they didn’t?

She had been planning on waiting for Bowie to be back, but then her mom shot her another one of those concerned looks, and it just slipped out.

“Mom, I like girls.”

As soon as she said it, she fought the urge to bury her face in her hands. She couldn’t look at Bex, only heard her move closer from the rustle on the couch. Her heart was beating so fast and her face was hot and she felt like she was about to faint.

“Really?” her mother asked, her voice soft.

Andi could only nod weakly, still not meeting her eyes.

Then Bex said, “Okay, cool. Thanks for telling me.”

Andi looked up then. She had done it. She had come out. Oh, god, she had – she had come out.

It was out. She was out. If only to one person. She couldn’t take it back now. And she didn’t want to take it back.

She looked back at her mom, holding her breath. This couldn’t be it, there had to be more, her mom had to have an opinion on this, this couldn’t be it.

“Cool? That’s it?”

Bex moved to sit right next to her, a hand reaching up to go through Andi’s short hair. That, more than anything, helped Andi exhale. She still wasn’t sure she wasn’t going to pass out, but her mom still loved her. And that meant everything.

“Do you know how I met your dad?” Bex asked, pulling her out of her thoughts. Andi shook her head, still too emotional to say a word, and kind of wondering what this had to do with her coming out. “We were introduced to each other by my ex. Roxie.” Andi stared on, not getting her point, and Bex rolled her eyes fondly. “Short for Roxanne.”

Wait.

What?

“Funny story, she was his ex too,” Bex went on, Andi barely hearing her over her mind imploding. “When we started dating, we actually found out that we had four exes in common.”

And then, somehow, Andi found her voice again.

“You’re kidding.” Bex shook her head, deadly serious despite the teasing smile on her lips. And suddenly Andi burst out laughing. “You dated a girl called Roxie?”

“Hey, she was in a band! That’s always been my weakness.”

She joined in Andi’s laughter after a few seconds. Andi couldn’t help it. It was as if all the tension and worry that had been emanating off her for the past hour – no, longer than that, so much longer than that – had transformed into this dizzying mix of relief, glee and elation, leaving her light-headed with happiness. Bex seemed to get it – of course she did.

Bex hugged her after they had calmed down. “I’m proud of you,” she said quietly, and Andi wrapped her arms around her as tightly as she could.

Bowie found them like that a few minutes later. He asked what he had missed, and Andi almost laughed, despite the lead weight settling on her chest at the idea of doing this again, of coming out to another person. It wasn’t as huge this time, though. This time, she knew she was going to be okay.

“I like girls,” she said.

Her dad’s expression barely changed, aside from one of his eyebrows raising slightly. His eyes flitted over quickly to Bex, before settling onto Andi, a warm smile on his face.

“Cool,” he said, moving to sit next to her.

Andi did laugh this time, the elated feeling back in full force. “You two are made for each other.”

Bowie kissed the top of her forehead. The three of them stayed that way for the better part of the night, Andi sandwiched between her parents and feeling more at ease than she could remember.

 *

Andi was in a daze as she called Buffy and Cyrus, unable to sit in one place as the pixelized faces of her friends appeared on her phone.

“Andi? What’s –”

“I came out to my parents.”

There were a few seconds of silence, then an outburst.

“Andi, that’s amazing,” Cyrus said, beaming.

“How did it go?” Buffy asked.

Andi gave them a full recap, from her realisation to coming out to her parents to going back to her room and having too much energy to sit still, prompting her to call her friends at 10 at night.

“I’m so proud of you,” Cyrus said, and Andi felt a rush of affection for him so powerful she almost cried. She hadn’t even told Cyrus about any of this, but here he was, reacting perfectly as always.

“We’re going to give you at least a million hugs when we get back,” Buffy added, and this time Andi did cry. Only a few tears, mostly of relief, and Buffy and Cyrus didn’t comment on it, only kept smiling at her.

“I have to go,” Buffy eventually said. “We’re leaving early in the morning. But we’ll talk more tomorrow, okay?”

They said their goodbyes, and Andi laid down in her bed, smiling. She knew she wouldn’t be getting sleep anytime soon, but it was worth it if it was to feel like this. She was more hyper than she could ever remember, an energy running deep in her entire body. She felt unstoppable, as if anything were possible.

Her phone tinged with a notification, and she opened a message from Cyrus.

 Cyrus: so so proud of you <3

 Cyrus: I’m sorry I wasn’t there while you figuring things out

 Me: you were great

 Me: i promise

 Me: i just wasn’t ready to face it yet when you tried to get me to talk to you

I get it, he texted back, and Andi felt herself tear up again. Of course he understood. This was Cyrus. She felt a rush of love and affection go out to him.

 Me: i love you

 Cyrus: I love you too

 *

True to her word, Buffy greeted Andi with a huge hug that almost knocked the air out of her lungs. Andi hugged her back just as tightly. She had missed her. A lot.

“I missed you so much,” Buffy said, mirroring her thoughts. “And I’m so proud of you.”

She had come over to Andi’s as soon as she arrived back in Shadyside, the middle of the afternoon after Andi had come out to her parents. Emotions were still running pretty high.

She stayed over for the rest of the day, the two of them catching up about everything and nothing, until a text from Jonah lit up both their phones.

 Jonah: I’m back, let’s meet up

 Marty: YES YES YES

 Marty: FINALLY

 Marty: My girlfriend and my best friend back the same day. Perhaps miracles do exist

 TJ: rude

 Marty: How many times do I have to tell you

 Marty: You’re both my best friends

 Jonah: anyways

 Jonah: where are we meeting up?

Buffy rolled her eyes over at Andi, who just grinned. She didn’t think anything could dampen her mood today.

 Buffy: if you guys are done

 Buffy: I’m at Andi’s, she says you can all come over

 TJ: except for me and cy

 TJ: we’re excluded from everything

 Buffy: forgive me for not feeling bad for you two living your best life on the coast in a 4 star hotel

 TJ: smh

 *

Everyone did end up coming over to Andi’s, even Amber. She and Andi watched in fascination as Marty ran as fast as he could to pick Buffy up and spin her in his arms, a bright smile on both their faces.

“What was up with you leaving so fast yesterday?” she asked.

“I, uh, remembered I had something to tell my parents,” Andi stammered.

Amber raised an eyebrow. “Fine, keep your secrets, Mack.”

But Andi found that she really, really didn’t want to. She wanted to tell Amber, she wanted to tell everyone. And yet… There was still this feeling buried deep inside of her, the fear of bearing this part of herself again and it not going well. She knew it was irrational (Amber was a lesbian, for goodness’ sake, and three of their friends were also gay), but, well, she wasn’t known for being rational, was she?

She was spared from answering by Jonah walking through the door. Marty let out a roar of delight before rushing over so the two of them could proceed to do a very complicated handshake that lasted a good fifteen seconds. Buffy just stared in consternation the whole time.

They all crowded in the living room, Andi and Jonah ending up sitting on the floor when the couch couldn’t fit all of them. Andi and Amber listened to everyone recapping their holidays; Amber told everyone about Andi’s contest coming up, which prompted Buffy to say that they would all come to see the results; Jonah announced an upcoming gig. It wasn’t until Marty mentioned that they should all get together for a new movie night soon that Andi was reminded of what had happened the previous night.

She shot a look at Buffy, who just gave her a supportive smile. It’s your choice, I’ll support you no matter what, she seemed to be telling her.

Andi looked around at all her friends. Her heart was beating irrationally fast again, like it had every time before she attempted to come out, but she wasn’t worried, not really. These were her friends, the people she loved the most in the world. It was going to be okay.

So she straightened up, opened her mouth, and said, “You know how I left in the middle of the show last night?”

Jonah looked clueless, but Amber, Marty and Iris turned to look at her curiously. It was obvious that they had been concerned but decided not to mention anything (at least, in Iris and Marty’s cases).

“It’s because…” The words wouldn’t come out and Andi panicked, searching for Buffy, who nodded, and managed a small smile. Andi took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down, and then she said it. “It’s because I realised that I like girls.”

There was a short stunned silence. Then Marty said, “Oooh, that makes sense,” and suddenly everyone was talking.

Jonah and Marty both hugged her, Iris joked that she hadn’t meant to awaken anything in her, and Amber just watched, giving her an unreadable look when Andi met her eyes.

“Anyways,” Buffy said once the excitement died down. “Food?”

The crew made their way to the kitchen, raiding the fridge. Andi made a mental note to pay Bex and Bowie back for a few of the things that would have mysteriously disappeared when they got back from the gym.

“Hey, Jonah,” Marty called, “what does it say about you that all three of your ex-girlfriends ended up being lesbians?”

Jonah gave him a look while everyone roared with laughter.

“Hey, I think I like boys, too,” Andi said. She caught Amber’s eye, who smiled almost shyly, looking down. “I don’t know. I’m still figuring it out.”

Amber gave her a tiny smile, something in her eyes that Andi couldn’t describe, and Andi’s heart skipped a beat.

The group separated not long after that; Iris said that she had to get going if she wanted to pick up Natalie from her ultimate frisbee practise, which prompted Jonah to go with her so that he could see his friend again. Marty and Buffy decided to go to the Spoon so that they could catch up.

Which left Andi with Amber.

“I, uh, I can go too, if you want,” Amber said after a few moments.

“You don’t have to,” Andi said, and was surprised to find that she meant it.

Amber smiled at that. She didn’t seem to be able to look at Andi directly in the eye, always looking away after a few seconds, but her gaze always seemed to find her anyways.

“No, it’s fine, I should go,” she said eventually. Andi nodded, a little disappointed. “But, uh…” She hesitated, looking away from Andi again. “I just wanted to say that I’m glad you worked it out.”

“You mean you knew?”

Amber blushed. “No, I just meant that I’ve been through trying to figure yourself out, and I know it’s not always fun. Or easy.” She rubbed the back of her neck. “If you… want to talk about it, or anything, I’m there. No pressure.”

Andi looked down, touched. “Thanks.”

Amber smiled. “I’ll see you around.”

Andi walked her to the door; Amber left and Andi went back inside, catching herself looking back at the other girl as she walked away.

[craigbrownphd-blog-blog]

ANA103 – SAP Lumira Version 2.0: Overview and Strategy #SAPTechEd Recap

Source: SAP You can watch the replay here I also attended the same session live (but with a different customer) Source: SAP Forward thinking statements are subject to change Source: SAP Bring self service to business user and more sophisticated dashboard design You get 3 applications with SAP Lumira: Discovery Client – catering for the self service business use cases Designer – more of a developer tool, enterprise ready applications with JavaScripting and a command engine in the product Add-on to the BI Platform that brings together both on the BI Platform There is also interoperability brought in, taking a self-service story to a development environment Source: SAP The two clients are sharing same graphical engine, output format (.lumx), The graphic above shows the key components, including an in-memory engine (also in the desktop tools) Reusing runtime for Design Studio for the HTML5 Source: SAP Legal successor for products “Seamless upgrade” for the tools License is covered above Source: SAP Designer has a “rich roadmap” shown above Left is the 2.0 release December will ship for 2.1 (planned) Source: SAP This slide was not covered in the lecture, but I thought it I would include it Source: SAP 2.0 has a Fiori style sheet; fits to the rest of the SAP styles Source: SAP Composites are a key feature for Designer; allowing designers to create their own composites, complex advanced components and reused across different applications Source: SAP Updates to the generic templates; get started quickly using the templates Source: SAP You can export to Analysis Office; you can keep navigating Source: SAP This was a quick outlook – ship scheduling/broadcasting capabilities; this is one of the gaps Source: SAP Commentary solution – comment on the dashboard layer and on the data; stored on a central place on the BI platform Source: SAP Three important themes for Lumira 2.1 are shown above Close gaps with BEx Web Source: SAP Copy components Source: SAP Improved PDF export is shown above Source: SAP Close the 1.x gaps Source: SAP At run time you can hide/show components Source: SAP Linked Analysis – filter value and context between stories Source: SAP Filter on measure within a visualization and set context is planned for 2.1 Source: SAP BW live analysis will be web-based in 2.1; the end to end live analysis to remove dependency on desktop for the end user Source: SAP consume Lumira on Fiori-fied BI Launchpad   Source: SAP Governed self service for end users – a few more rights to export stories Source: SAP Planned for 2018 – 3 themes are shown above Tighter integration with SAP Analytics Source: SAP Simplify workflows is part of the themes   Upcoming ASUG webcasts: Oct 19 An exciting new future for SAP BusinessObjects Web Intelligence Oct 26 Overall SAP Analytics strategy and direction  Oct 31 What’s new in SAP BI Mobile and Roadmap Nov 7 Cross-Solution Analytics with SAP Analytics Cloud Nov 9 What’s New in SAP Lumira 2.0 Nov 20 What’s new in Analysis Office 2.6? Nov 28 – Introduction to SAP Data Hub  Nov 30 Refresh Expert Streams on Predictive Factory Dec 5 – Update on Conversion Tools for SAP BW/4HANA Dec 12 Best Practices for Automated Analytic http://bit.ly/2i7HTIv #SAP #SAPCloud #AI

[craigbrownphd-blog-blog]

ANA103 – SAP Lumira Version 2.0: Overview and Strategy #SAPTechEd Recap

Source: SAP You can watch the replay here I also attended the same session live (but with a different customer) Source: SAP Forward thinking statements are subject to change Source: SAP Bring self service to business user and more sophisticated dashboard design You get 3 applications with SAP Lumira: Discovery Client – catering for the self service business use cases Designer – more of a developer tool, enterprise ready applications with JavaScripting and a command engine in the product Add-on to the BI Platform that brings together both on the BI Platform There is also interoperability brought in, taking a self-service story to a development environment Source: SAP The two clients are sharing same graphical engine, output format (.lumx), The graphic above shows the key components, including an in-memory engine (also in the desktop tools) Reusing runtime for Design Studio for the HTML5 Source: SAP Legal successor for products “Seamless upgrade” for the tools License is covered above Source: SAP Designer has a “rich roadmap” shown above Left is the 2.0 release December will ship for 2.1 (planned) Source: SAP This slide was not covered in the lecture, but I thought it I would include it Source: SAP 2.0 has a Fiori style sheet; fits to the rest of the SAP styles Source: SAP Composites are a key feature for Designer; allowing designers to create their own composites, complex advanced components and reused across different applications Source: SAP Updates to the generic templates; get started quickly using the templates Source: SAP You can export to Analysis Office; you can keep navigating Source: SAP This was a quick outlook – ship scheduling/broadcasting capabilities; this is one of the gaps Source: SAP Commentary solution – comment on the dashboard layer and on the data; stored on a central place on the BI platform Source: SAP Three important themes for Lumira 2.1 are shown above Close gaps with BEx Web Source: SAP Copy components Source: SAP Improved PDF export is shown above Source: SAP Close the 1.x gaps Source: SAP At run time you can hide/show components Source: SAP Linked Analysis – filter value and context between stories Source: SAP Filter on measure within a visualization and set context is planned for 2.1 Source: SAP BW live analysis will be web-based in 2.1; the end to end live analysis to remove dependency on desktop for the end user Source: SAP consume Lumira on Fiori-fied BI Launchpad   Source: SAP Governed self service for end users – a few more rights to export stories Source: SAP Planned for 2018 – 3 themes are shown above Tighter integration with SAP Analytics Source: SAP Simplify workflows is part of the themes   Upcoming ASUG webcasts: Oct 19 An exciting new future for SAP BusinessObjects Web Intelligence Oct 26 Overall SAP Analytics strategy and direction  Oct 31 What’s new in SAP BI Mobile and Roadmap Nov 7 Cross-Solution Analytics with SAP Analytics Cloud Nov 9 What’s New in SAP Lumira 2.0 Nov 20 What’s new in Analysis Office 2.6? Nov 28 – Introduction to SAP Data Hub  Nov 30 Refresh Expert Streams on Predictive Factory Dec 5 – Update on Conversion Tools for SAP BW/4HANA Dec 12 Best Practices for Automated Analytic http://bit.ly/2hXoB8u #SAP #SAPCloud #AI

[craigbrownphd-blog-blog]

ANA103 – SAP Lumira Version 2.0: Overview and Strategy #SAPTechEd Recap

Source: SAP You can watch the replay here I also attended the same session live (but with a different customer) Source: SAP Forward thinking statements are subject to change Source: SAP Bring self service to business user and more sophisticated dashboard design You get 3 applications with SAP Lumira: Discovery Client – catering for the self service business use cases Designer – more of a developer tool, enterprise ready applications with JavaScripting and a command engine in the product Add-on to the BI Platform that brings together both on the BI Platform There is also interoperability brought in, taking a self-service story to a development environment Source: SAP The two clients are sharing same graphical engine, output format (.lumx), The graphic above shows the key components, including an in-memory engine (also in the desktop tools) Reusing runtime for Design Studio for the HTML5 Source: SAP Legal successor for products “Seamless upgrade” for the tools License is covered above Source: SAP Designer has a “rich roadmap” shown above Left is the 2.0 release December will ship for 2.1 (planned) Source: SAP This slide was not covered in the lecture, but I thought it I would include it Source: SAP 2.0 has a Fiori style sheet; fits to the rest of the SAP styles Source: SAP Composites are a key feature for Designer; allowing designers to create their own composites, complex advanced components and reused across different applications Source: SAP Updates to the generic templates; get started quickly using the templates Source: SAP You can export to Analysis Office; you can keep navigating Source: SAP This was a quick outlook – ship scheduling/broadcasting capabilities; this is one of the gaps Source: SAP Commentary solution – comment on the dashboard layer and on the data; stored on a central place on the BI platform Source: SAP Three important themes for Lumira 2.1 are shown above Close gaps with BEx Web Source: SAP Copy components Source: SAP Improved PDF export is shown above Source: SAP Close the 1.x gaps Source: SAP At run time you can hide/show components Source: SAP Linked Analysis – filter value and context between stories Source: SAP Filter on measure within a visualization and set context is planned for 2.1 Source: SAP BW live analysis will be web-based in 2.1; the end to end live analysis to remove dependency on desktop for the end user Source: SAP consume Lumira on Fiori-fied BI Launchpad   Source: SAP Governed self service for end users – a few more rights to export stories Source: SAP Planned for 2018 – 3 themes are shown above Tighter integration with SAP Analytics Source: SAP Simplify workflows is part of the themes   Upcoming ASUG webcasts: Oct 19 An exciting new future for SAP BusinessObjects Web Intelligence Oct 26 Overall SAP Analytics strategy and direction  Oct 31 What’s new in SAP BI Mobile and Roadmap Nov 7 Cross-Solution Analytics with SAP Analytics Cloud Nov 9 What’s New in SAP Lumira 2.0 Nov 20 What’s new in Analysis Office 2.6? Nov 28 – Introduction to SAP Data Hub  Nov 30 Refresh Expert Streams on Predictive Factory Dec 5 – Update on Conversion Tools for SAP BW/4HANA Dec 12 Best Practices for Automated Analytic http://bit.ly/2zjxvXY #SAP #SAPCloud #AI