#stupid biIIIIIIIIIIITCH!!!!

[moldypoff-rb]

HANDJSKSHZHSHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

boo boo the fucking idiot dumbass stupid fucking moron fool the clown

[sanctumpyre]

This was a stupid thing to do, Cain knew this and yet here he was standing in front of the large double doors of the Embassy in Pride. Who stood on the other side of the door didn’t know he was coming. It was just offices on the other side but who sat in that office could kill him immediately if he wasn’t careful.

Yet he still presses a hand on the door and lets himself in. No one would be foolish enough to attempt striking a Angel in God’s domain, must be why the door was unlocked in the first place and once Cain came in, he spoke to the woman on the other side.

“Excuse me, Miss Angel Woman ma’am. I have a request.”

{🔥} - "..." Her door might be unlocked, but damn, not even a knock?

Oh, who is she kidding. Sometimes in Hell you should be grateful someone is willing to try & at least be respectful. Yahbel's had people burst into her office & hit her with a 'Heeeeeeeeeeey biiiiiiiiiiiitch~'. Urg.

Sea green eyes give the boy a glance. He seems familiar, but she can't quite remember from what, & that fact annoys her a little, like her age is getting to her.... A sigh, the pen in her hand stills for a moment, before continuing to write at the parchments laid out before her desk.

"You may speak, but I can make no promises." If he's gotten into these offices parts, then clearly this isn't just come run-of-the-mill sinner or overlord, so giving him a few moments won't kill her, but it also won't make her delay doing her work. Yahbel much rather get this done as quick as possible & return home.

[thessalian]

Thess vs A Grave Error in Judgement

Since we're coming up to Christmas, it's time for the annual "Think Of Gifts For My Parentals" anxiety. I mean, it's low-level anxiety, but it's anxiety nonetheless. They can afford the things they want and borderline need, y'see, and they don't want me to spend too much money, especially not in the current climate. So I have to get creative. My stepdad in particular is a biiiiiiiiiiiitch to shop for, so at the end of the day, I just focus on food. And with things the way they are, making things probably isn't on the cards. Besides, I'm already doing dessert. But I still wanted something nice. Something fancy and particularly special that he wouldn't be able to get elsewhere, at least in part. So I thought - because I am an idiot - that I would check out the West End. Fancy chocolate shops, Chinatown, and a Christmas market going on in the St Martin In The Fields' crypt.

The West End. On a Saturday. Four days before Christmas. ME.

I thought it'd be fine. I thought it'd just be a couple of hours. I thought people would at least be trying to get dinner if I went in the afternoon.

I was an idiot.

Yeah, people were trying to find food by the time I got there. But the reason for that was the massive queues - and I mean down the block - at basically every eatery in the area. I'm not just talking the fancy ones, either. I am talking McDonalds. Which of course narrowed the pavements, which were packed. I had my cane kicked so many times - and mine is one of those fold-up ones, which meant one kick was so hard it knocked the whole thing out of alignment. I can't blame anyone; they couldn't watch where they were going because there were too many people. It was my mistake entirely. But so much being squished and staggering around and no room to breathe. I haven't been near that many people in years. There was even more breathing space at MCM Comic Con, and that's saying something.

Chinatown was not quite a bust, though a lot of my favourite little shops are restaurants now. But I found some little crunchy sesame cookies and some chocolate mochi and I thought I'd try him on Pocky. The fancy chocolate places ... that was a little too rich for my blood; if I want him to have chocolates, I'll make truffles. The St Martin In The Fields' Christmas market was better; I got him some fancy homemade jams and chutneys. Figured I'd stop on the way home for some cheese and crackers.

Then a bus driver shut the bus doors on my left hand. I guess he was in a hurry. Nothing broken - there are those rubber things on bus doors, for safety - but it was very abrupt and hit pretty hard, so there's some swelling and a hell of a bruise on the middle first knuckle.

I am paying for it now, let me tell you - and not just in the left hand. Everything hurts. I'm mostly just grumpy at myself for being so stupid as to do that to myself in the first place. I hope I recover by Tuesday. Hell, I hope I recover at least a little by tomorrow - I need ingredients for Christmas dessert, but I'm not going to Sainsbury's feeling like this.

[annieisyourfavourite]

u know what, i am gonna show u guys the email she had the audacity to send me. first email is mine, second is her response.

like. holy shit

GOD my director is such a BITCH

[thenerdytomboy]

Hehe

Hehehehe

EHEHEHEHEHEHEH

THE TIME AS HAS ALMOST COME

WITHIN THE HOUR I WILL HAVE EVICTED THIS THICK FUCKIN MOP FROM MY HEAD

[spookiekewchie]

how hot are these 👁👁

This was a personal attack on my pussy person omg

Not My Type | Alright | Cute | Adorable | Pretty | Gorgeous | LORD HAVE MERCY

THAT GOES FOR ALL THREE BECAUSE BIIIIIIIIIIIITCH THEY ALL STUPID FINE

[uzumakinarootos]

So I’m 15 episodes into Sin Senos Si Hay Paraiso and the first episode already had me fucked up by diverging from the last couple of episodes of Sin Senos No. Like, Catalina La Grande died at nighttime AND she cancelled on Yessicá last minute which is why she was seen buying her car with Marcial in the last episode. So why did they make Catalina La Grande die in the middle of the day and then have Yessicá showing up, seeing Big Catalina shot dead and then walking away? Ugh and don’t even get me started on how they completely changed the way that Big Catalina found out about Yessicá and Marcial…

But you know what, that’s all forgivable. Like I’m salty but if we have to sacrifice a few continuity errors for a higher production quality and less cheesy storyline, I’m all for it.

What I’m hella pissed about is this bs that they’re trying to feed us about how Yessicá has always hated Catalina La Grande because Catalina was prettier and smarter than her her whole life. Biiiiiiiiiiiitch.

First of all Big Catalina hella dumb af. Like I love her and she truly, deeply is a good person but girl was stupid. Like not book or street smart at all la pobresita.

And second of all, they really just came at us with the whole Yessicá became a Pimp because none of the Narcos wanted to sleep with her because she wasn’t as pretty as Catalina La Grande? Ummmmm, Catalina became a prepago in the very first episode when Yessicá attempted to pimp her out to El Titi FOR. THE. FIRST. TIME. So how does the whole jealousy thing work when Catalina was never a prepago before to begin with ? And she still hadn’t gotten her breasts done yet so how could any Narco want her?

Yessicá and Catalina were best friends and the reason that Yessicá betrayed her was not because of some bs ooc jealousy between them, it was because they both grew ambiciosas con el dinero, poder, status and became greedy and materialistic af. Yessicá and Big Catalina cared for eachother very much given that Yessica spent half an episode crying in the bathroom before she went and betrayed Catalina and Catalina herself referred to her as her sister many times.

The evils that come with the world of Narcotraficantes, her past as prostitute turned Pimp, growing up in poverty, her greed for money and power twisting her into this ruthless Dura we see now is a much much MUCH better reason for her hatred of Catalina, who stood in her way of accomplishing her goal, and not some half assed backstory that doesn’t fit Yessicá’s character at all.

Like....que le pasa damn

[broodingsoul]

50 Random Things About So You Think You Can Dance (S14E3)

1.  Why did the New York City auditions get an introduction like it was the season premiere?  I’m assuming because they needed to fill 28 minutes of the episode.

2.  Mary Murphy looks fucking ADORABLE in this school-girl length pleated skirt and deconstructed blazer.  It’s honestly the best she’s ever looked.

3.  And behind her is “triple-threat” “superstar” Vanessa Hudgens, looking like a turd in that shit-brown coat and dark matte lip.

4.  I seriously still don’t understand how Vanessa Hudgens got on the judges panel.  Who on the production team thought, “You know who’s hip and the teens relate to?  That one girl from that Disney movie that was popular 9 years ago.”

5.  Oh ew ew ew, Vanessa Hudgens also has on a weird buttoned straight-lined bodice the same color as the coat.  What is this look?  Who said this look was okay.

6.  “La La Land’s choreographer” LET IT GO.

***

Kaylee “Impavido” Millis

7.  “And what name did your parents give you?” Who gives a shit, Nigel, she wants to be called Impavido.  It costs you zero dollars to call her that.

8.  I’m 100% surprised it took three episodes for us to hear “Issues” by Julia Michaels as a choreographed number.

9.  I like Impavido’s movement.  It’s like if animation and contemporary had a baby.  The choreography itself is really unique and nothing this show has ever really seen before.  Her dancing is almost like if Pixar decided to animate dancing.  I really hope she makes it to the top 20, because I think she’s got the style to nail hip-hop, and I think she’s got the carriage to nail ballroom.  I’d love to see her paired with Jaja.  Incredibly charismatic and just an absolute joy to watch.

10.  Impavido cries when she gets her ticket to the Academy, as she said she would, and then she kisses deuces up to the heavens, so I’d really like to know more of her story.

11.  She and Mark Villaver from the first episode are my two favorites so far. 

***

Ana Sanchez

12.  “I heard about the Hot Tamale Train.  I’m like, I wanna be on that train so bad.”  I don’t have a comment.  Just the quote.

13.  Great lifts and tricks, but there’s something a little juvenile about her energy onstage.  I might be that the choreography in-between just seems like she’s bopping around and not actually dancing?  Plus her mugging is super annoying.  I’m not a fan.

14.  Mary’ll put her on the train, tho.

15.  “I love that way that you’re like “WHOOO!” when you’re dancing!” exclaims Vanessa Hudgens.  The animatronics in her jaw squeak as the wheels that control how wide her eyes open push past their limits.  Her teeth glow impossibly white.  “WE’RE GONNA BOP TO THE TOP” she screeches.  Mary Murphy’s Hot Tamale Train ceases to exist.  Mary Murphy becomes but a wisp of smoke of a memory.

***

Koine Iwasaki

16.  This has nothing to do with Koine, but I’ma already so fucking done with this “It Ain’t Me” song by Selena Gomez.  SO done with it.

17.  Before Koine even starts dancing, her mother Yuriko and friend Alesha are already crying.  Oh God, my heartstrings.

18.  The most interesting parts of Koine’s audition are when she’s doing the really cool contemporary/crump fusion movements.  It’s really interesting the way Impavido’s animation/contemporary was.  When Koine goes back to straight contemporary, it’s less moving for me, because it’s a little paint-by-numbers, a little too schmaltzy with the music.  Overall, I like her, but I don’t think she deserves a standing ovation from the judges.

19.  “And then when you smiled, I literally said, ‘Aw!’”  I might have to end each recap with a list of the stupidest things Vanessa Hudgens said during the episode.  It’s either that, or I stop recapping her entirely, because godDAMN does she say some stupid shit.

***

20.  Hip-hop montage.

21.  Kyle Bennett Jr. is “an animator-slash-tugger.”  I’m just a tugger, but we’re not supposed to talk about that in public.

22.  OH.  He’s a tutter.  I am definitely not that.

23.  Alex Diaz grabs his crotch a lot and has a beautiful smile.  I’d do him.

Joseph “Klassic” Carella & Huwer “Havoc” Marche Jr.

24.  Cat’s hair is EVERYTHING right now.  Just really relaxed waves, like she’s going to the beach.  In New York.  In February.

25.  I don’t know how to critique their style of dance.  I like their imagination, and I’ve always been a fan where it looks like one dancer controls another.  They do it well.

26.  Nigel and Mary Murphy give them a standing ovation, and it takes Vanessa Hughes about three seconds too long to realize she should probably also stand.

27.  How many uppers do you think Mary takes on any given day?  It can’t all be natural personality.

***

Chaz Wolcott

28.  Is a tap dancer, and I hope he’s good because I love a good tap dancer.

29.  That was the most boring sentence I’ve ever written.  I’m sorry.

30.  Here, I’ll take my shirt off to make up for it.

31.  Holy shit, Chaz Wolcott is 29 years old, but looks all of 20.

32.  Technically he’s very good, but there’s something a little too white bread about him for me.  I think that he’s tapping to an old jazz classic and wearing this weird members-only style jacket.  I want to see him do something fun and fresh and contemporary.  His choreography is great, but I’m just kinda bored.

33.  Vanessa Hudgens seems like she hates Mary Murphy, and it’s the only thing I like about her.

34.  “It’s so fun, just making dreams come true!” Vanessa Hudgens croons.  Her throat undulates, her body ripples.  She phases in and out of time, the blips of her being spelling out Morse Code.  “We’re just getting started,” it spells.

***

Darius “The Bigger Cheese” Reed

35.  Look, I know Darius is doing this as a joke, but I am here for this fabulous display of fearlessness.

36.  “What about ‘The Grand Fromage?’”  I have never loved Cat Deeley more than I do in this moment.

37.  Nigel wasn’t expecting Darius to be a man, which is annoying and homophobic.  You think after 14 seasons I’d be used to that.

38.  For once, Vanessa Hudgens didn’t piss me off.  Nigel and Mary were kinda low-key shady about everything, but VH just told him how fun he was, to keep being himself, and to keep dancing and come back.

39.  Oh, except now that he left, Darius is copping an attitude.  If you’re gonna be The Bigger Cheese, be the Bigger Person.

***

40.  They could have let me see shirtless Logan Hernandez’s entire shirtless routine.  I’ve done enough for this show, it’s time they do for me.

41.  Abby Griffin’s contemporary-pointe routine seemed really boring, so thanks for editing through that.  We’re still not even though.

42.  “I have a lot of technical aspects, but it’s technique in ways you haven’t really seen it yet.”  Christina Moya-Palacios sounds like a real special snowflake, but the snippet of her audition puts the proof in the pudding.

43.  “You dance the way I wish I danced,” Vanessa Hudgens admits wistfully.  Suddenly she grows cold,  Her jaw slacks, her eyes dim, as something else inside her takes control.  “I don’t dance,” the entity growls.  As quick as it comes on, it lets go.

***

Ryan Bailey

44.  “My own dance style is kind of weird.  I do a lot of shaking, almost like seizure things.”  I just—I don’t have the patience, y’all.

45.  Somewhere, Sia’s choreographer is like, “Biiiiiiiiiiiitch.”

46.  This audition is ten seconds in and Nigel is NOT. HAVING. IT.  Dude has technique, though.  It’s frustrating, because I want to see him dance, but his choreography seems like a gimmick.  When he combines his style with actual dancing, like in his jumps and leaps, it’s actually breath-taking.  Everything in between just seems weird for weirdness’s sake.

47.  Nigel’s response surprises me.  “You know why I liked it?  Because I didn’t like it.  I liked that I didn’t like it because it gave me emotions.  It changed my thought about dance.  I hated it, so I liked it.”  Fair, but also I just need to see more elements of dance combined with his style.

48.  “I saw a duck.  There were a lot of duck things happening,” Vanessa giggles.  The giggling grows louder and louder, more desperate, as she tosses back glass after glass of champagne.  “This is a night to remember!” she shrieks.  Her legs shake.  This could be too much.

49.  That was a rather unceremonious end to the episode.  I would’ve put Ryan through to choreography, because I wouldn’t have been able to merit his style just on style alone.

50.  But then, nobody’s paying me for my opinion.  Yet.

[swainhoe]

I used to think it was funny and kind of stupid assuming that every person stepped on pll was somehow A like when CeCe showed up I was just like ya know what? Ima give this one the benefit of the doubt but biiiiiiiiiiiitch I was wrong 😕

[mcauja]

Women & Weed... and a baby???

Read that title, take a moment to remove your britches from betwixt your uptight asscheeks, and follow me as I paint this picture for you right quick... January 4, 2017. Just days after naming and claiming my greatness for the year, which included losing that last 15 pounds, going back to school AGAIN, cooling out on flings and meaningless one night stands, and finally obtaining a passport, I sat on the toilet of my closet sized guest bathroom, scared shitless, waiting to see what the twin pregnancy tests I'd taken simultaneously would tell me. "Lol biiiiiiiiiiiitch GUESS WHAT?!" is what those pregnancy tests revealed. Rather quickly, I might add, so there was no time for second guessing. Those pink goddamned lines appeared like a sleazy landlord on the 2nd; posthaste, ready to run my pockets and kill my vibe for the foreseeable future. I was fucking pregnant. Gross. I'm sure most women take those few earth shattering moments afterwards to let the future materialize before them, beginning to dream of a reality they'd never imagined before. Not me. I had a nightcap jay rolled and ready for me before I discovered this new truth because I mean c'mon lol no way, right? RIGHT?! Wrong. So I take my few deep breaths, text my best friend and tell her that she needs to fix this because yeah NO, and I clomp back to my room in a stupor as muscle memory leads me directly to my ashtray where the fresh blunt is waiting; calling. Whenever things in my life go awry, all I need is a little time, a little space to think, and a little bud and I can fix or fineness anything. But just as I'm about to blaze the stress away, I could feel myself developing a little white angel on my shoulder. "You're pregnant Auja, that's bad for the baby dumbass." "Oh yeah, I forgot... Fuck." I smoked a little anyway tho because fuck that little white useless ass angel. Where was she when my uterus was being infiltrated?! Why didn't she tell me to swallow instead?!?! Stupid bitch, I hate that angel. February 9, 2017. It's been a few weeks since I realized I was harboring a squatter in my womb and life has flipped upside down. It's as if my body was waiting for me to catch up to what was happening before shit could really start happening. Mere days after those God forsaken pink lines appeared, morning noon and night sickness followed suit, with intense all day nausea bringing up the rear. I'd made a doctors appointment immediately and on the day of, while filling out the bullshit paperwork, I find myself once again stuck and scared shitless. "How often do you: consume caffeine, drink alcohol, smoke cigarettes, partake in recreational drug use?" Oh shit. Should I lie???? I should lie right?? I mean I didn't even do any of that other stuff before so I'm good. And it's not like they'll know anyway; I've stopped since I found out so it's not like I would really be lying. "Oh we'll also need a urine sample in just a second" FUCK!!!!! Okay, just tell the truth then. Fuck. And so I did. The Gods honest, "every damn day, at least twice a day." truth. Would this doctor call the imaginary pregnancy police on me? Would she look over the rim of her glasses and judge me as if I'd stabbed a white woman multiple times and was about to get away with it?! Would everyone pretend it's all good then on the day of my delivery, CPS shows up and rips my beautiful baby from my arms without bothering to cut the umbilical cord?!? I had completely went on auto pilot and panic mode while Dr. Nice White Lady went through the questionnaire with me, dreading that moment we'd have to discuss my hophead tendencies. "I see here it says you used drugs before pregnancy..." "Yes but only weed" "Well while we can't encourage or discourage that, I do have to inform you that it could possibly affect the baby" *inner dialogue* "DUH bitch that's why I stop-- hold up... did she just say she can't DISCOURAGE me from sparking up??" *Bitch ass angel refusing to mind her business* "Yeah but she can't ENCOURAGE you either dumbass" "1) call me dumbass again and see what happens. 2) nobody ever ENCOURAGES smoking weed but other weed heads. She's a doctor, she basically just told me roll up at my own risk..." "No, that's not what she sai--" "Aaaaahhhh!! Unt-un shut yo ass up, I ain't tryna hear it. You already know what's up!!!" And she did. My stupid shoulder angel I mean, not Dr. Nice White Lady. She knew what I'd been suffering through, but, you, reading this, may have no idea what pregnancy does to women. Each instance is different. All the forums and mom blogs I scoured for slivers of peace and sanity would reiterate this time and again. Most often they tell you to ask your doctor about these things, but your doctor will more than likely bullshit you then prescribe a drug you can't roll up and smoke, but a drug nonetheless. A drug that might make you a little LESS nauseous, but would not keep you from retching up the food you just ate 10 minutes ago. Some days it can be so bad, water won't stay put. You ever thrown up ice cold water??? Spoiler alert, that shit comes back just as cold and it's fucking disgusting. I took to eating Bomb Pops because supposedly popsicles soothe the stomach and help fight against dehydrating yourself and your unborn child but in my case it just made for patriotic toilet decorations. Can't even lie tho, it was kinda cool watching the red white and blue come up in the exact same order as it had gone down. Gross, right? Lol And it's not just stomach issues us preggers have to endure. The sleepless nights, the aches and pains of a body growing and changing to accommodate new life, the mood swings, the anxiety. THE ANXIETY OMG. As it stands, at 4 months I should be gaining about 1-2 pounds per week. I am currently 5 pounds lighter than I was when I first found out about my baby. I worry CONSTANTLY I'm not feeding it enough; that the lil guy(or girl, please be a girl) isn't getting the proper nutrition. That I'm a shit mom because I can't seem to do this without weed. But I mean gahdamn what's a woman to do?? Liquids don't hold and sometimes even just the sight or smell of food while sober makes me dry heave. I search google every day looking for new developments and studies that will assuage my guilt. I don't have to look very hard, almost all weed/pregnancy related studies conclude there isn't enough evidence to surely say weed will harm a fetus, but science can't ever let you have your moment so the "That doesn't mean it's okay" undertones are always there. The judgement I'm sure I'd receive from family and certain friends worries me, and every appointment I have with Dr. Nice White Lady, I fear the lecture I'm sure she's holding onto. But at days end, as I puff puff then take my prenatal vitamin, I can't help but feel a little indignant. My body, my baby, my bud, right?! If things are okay, then I should keep doing what works right?? I heard it's healthy heartbeat and witnessed Baby Big Heads growth in the sonogram. It's recently started to move around in there and it feels like gnarly gas lol I gladly welcome the morning vomit because that means my lil shorty is still alive and kickin. Afterwards I toke up and eat a hearty breakfast and then lunch and sometimes even dinner. I drink way more water than I ever have and make sure I'm getting all my fruit and veggie servings. As it stands, I'm living and self caring better than I ever have before, and my kid is all the better for it. What harm will a little session do, ya know?? Peace and blessings.

[unicornrepublic]

I'm a stupid horrible fucking biiiiiiiiiiiitch no one look at me I'm