#the arguments that occurred while discussing the plot was pretty funny

[womanyellsatcloud]

Put on Goblet of Fire at my parents' house and all the fathers were locked in. Easiest Father's Day ever.

[lavenderek]

i have a thought to express, feel free to scroll past.

i’m gonna discuss rape and sexual abuse in this post. it’s also long because i don’t really have a conclusion, it’s just some thoughts. 

so i was looking into that reality show that facilitated shane dawson’s horrible movie “not cool” and i stumbled across a reddit thread posted by someone who was a fan of his as a preteen. the OP alleged that shane’s content contributed to them developing some serious issues including body dysmorphia and the normalization of sexual behavior involving children. 

some of the comments were in support and agreement, but a large amount of them were like, “where were your parents? it’s not shane’s job to police what you see online. it’s not his fault you were too young for his content.” 

now, shane was well aware from the jump that his fans were mostly kids and teens - he talked about it multiple times - but that’s not what this post is about. this post is about that particular argument, which does not sit well with me.

it reminded me of a couple years ago when i made a very critical post about c*ptive prince. 

pause: i want to make it crystal clear that i am not drawing a comparison between people who like cp and shane dawson. i’m not mad anymore, so i am not making this post making a value judgment on cp or fans of it, positive or negative. 

specifically, i was really bothered by the way cp content was posted and shared with no mention of or reference to the actual material. people were calling it a queer romance. it was a little-known series by a little-known author, so there were no synopses anywhere online, only the summary you’d see on the back of the book. so people would seek out cp thinking it was a romance and be blindsided by the fact that, spoilers, the story is set in a fantasy world where child rape is a major tenet of society. the scenes are explicit, detailed, and many. it’s not a thing that happens once or twice and is a major plot point, it’s a thing that happens multiple times in every chapter and is just kind of a thing that’s going on. if you’ve ever read twilight, i would compare the presence of rape in cp to the presence of rain in twilight.

like, that’s how often it happened, that’s how it was treated. sometimes with indifference, sometimes with a negative opinion, sometimes it caused problems, bella talks about it every two pages. it is a very rapey series. 

and people like, did not want to discuss this. they were like, “the characters decide the rape is bad in the end. and that’s not even what the story is about, it just happens in the story. i don’t know what to tell you.” like... people were not receptive to any kind of conversation about this topic lmfao, it was very touchy. they wanted to acknowledge that rape itself is bad, and then they wanted the subject closed. 

now, why is this a problem? i read the books. there were parts i enjoyed, and there were parts i didn’t enjoy. i’m not gonna reread them, but i’m still game to talk about it. ultimately i wanted to be able to talk about books with a friend of mine, and while i was like, “yikes, this is a lot of rape, was not expecting the volume of rape,” it didn’t occur to me this would be a pervasive issue at all until a different friend of mine happened upon it. this other friend was a rape survivor, and i happened to know she would find this content very upsetting. when she said she was thinking of buying the book, i was like, “halt, you know what happens in it, right?” 

nope! she didn’t. she saw cute fanart and a ficlet on her dash, somebody told her it was a queer romance. nowhere was there any indicator in summaries online or the posts she was seeing that the book would describe a person being drugged and sexually abused. she was pretty relieved that i’d warned her and shaken that that’s what happens in the books lmao. she would never have guessed. the cp fandom was made up of people who loved the main pairing, and they’d talk about them being in love and draw them being in love, and it felt like everybody was just acting like the rape wasn’t even present in the books lmao. 

pause: i didn’t go in the tags. this is not representative of the fandom as a whole. this is just my and my friend’s experience of it as passive internetgoers.

people got uncomfortable and a little defensive if i brought it up. they’d agree to tag for cp, but if you don’t know what cp is about, that isn’t helpful information. like that post that’s like, “waterboarding at guantanamo bay sounds like a lot of fun if you don’t know what either of those things are” lmao. if you don’t know what cp is about, tagging for it just tells you what it’s called. and it very clearly ruined everyone’s fun if i talked about this. 

so that’s what i was mad about, i was mad that i felt as though there was no recourse here, and i was mad because i felt like the cp fandom was the emperor’s new clothes. nobody was acting like it even existed and everybody got uncomfortable if i brought it up, like, i legitimately wondered at some point if i had somehow accidentally read a kinky rewrite of it, that the real version did not have rape in it and nobody knew what i was talking about. i felt like i was going crazy and i got shitty in the middle of the night one time, and wrote that post. 

i ultimately deleted it, so i do not remember how it was worded; but i do recall that it was a venting post, it was not intended to reach a wider audience. i was not trying to convince anyone in that moment, i was just talking shit. so i can bet that it probably came across as very judgmental and unkind. 

i made a bunch of people very angry with that post. somebody got thousands of notes by reblogging with an impassioned smackdown saying basically what those redditors were saying about shane - it’s not their job to police what people see online. it’s not their fault you were unprepared for cp. 

i do not think this is a nuanced enough argument because i do not think it acknowledges that not all content is created equal. 

i even got an anon ask in good faith saying, well, a huge trigger for me is body horror, and people will draw or reblog stuff with body horror in it, and i can’t hold that against them. 

and like, no, you can’t, but body horror is not the same as rape or child sexual abuse. body horror isn’t the same as sex trafficking. right? like those things aren’t comparable in the way that i think the anon was wanting them to be. they were saying that both of these are common triggers that people would want tagged and be unable to move past in media, you know? and i get that, i got what they were saying. 

kind of like that cartoonist who wrote a spooky horror comic a while ago and somebody sent them an ask being like, “that was really scary, you usually post fun comics, this was damaging, unfollowed :/” like obviously a stranger’s fear of spooky things is not something he should be expected to take on on his own blog lmao. i am deeply afraid of ghosts, by the way. 

but according to rainn.org, 1 in 5 women experience rape in their lifetime. 1 in 5 women are not frightened by literal ghosts in their lifetime. 1 in 3 girls and 1 in 7 boys aren’t body horrored. body horror and ghosts aren’t used on a global scale as tools to control and abuse people and they do not have the same connotations of shame, degradation, and control. the things are not the same. 

i don’t have an easy answer. i can’t wave my magic wand and make people not enjoy the rape erotica, nor was that my goal in the first place. i wasn’t clutching my pearls like, “how dare you! do not draw this art! think of the children!” and i don’t know how else i would have solved the problem, aside from having a weird disclaimer under your art of two dudes cuddling that says “warning, these dudes are from a book that’s got several thousand words of explicit rape in it, and i know that, you’re not the only one seeing that,” like that’s a lot and i get it. 

i don’t have an easy answer because there isn’t one. i felt like “well, that’s not my problem” was an easy answer. 

as i get older, the more responsibility i have as an adult online to maintain boundaries between me and minors, for example. i am not responsible for their internet experience and they can’t get mad at me for cussing or writing about gay werewolves on my blog, but i do have to be mindful of that context if i’m interacting with someone online. that’s where the complexity comes in. you can’t wash your hands of the context of the things you say and do online. 

just how to solve these problems, i did not know then and i do not know now. i guess we take it on a case by case basis. 

if you’re curious about shane dawson and his horrible movie, by the way, this guy did a few funny videos about the horrible movie and this guy did a not funny but comprehensive breakdown of shane and his career. 

and i tried to tint my eyebrows for the first time the other day, i have red hair and my eyebrows are darker than my hair for some reason, so i tried to use an eyebrow tint to lift my brows just like, a shade, so be closer to my hair? but in doing this i discovered that my eyebrows are a mixture of red and brown? 

so the red hairs lifted to a sunny orange, and the brown hairs stayed brown. so my eyebrows are fully like, calico right now. boom, orange juice, that’s life

[avelera]

Hi! For the Director's Cut, how about "How to Accidentally Become a Jaeger Pilot in 10 Easy Steps"? Particularly the stick-fighting scene, (which I adore), but really any commentary on it would be awesome :)

Oiajsdoiasjd AAAAH, thank you I really adore that one too, it’s so fun! 

OK, so, I’ve actually got stuff to say about the fight scene in "How to Accidentally Become a Jaeger Pilot in 10 Easy Steps“! 

First of all, it’s the scene that made me want to write the fic in the first place and I plotted most of the fic while on the treadmill, where a lot of my more “active” story ideas come together. I think it was also after seeing a Tumblr post that broke down to something like, “Wouldn’t it be funny if Newt and Hermann actually became Jaeger pilots because Newt would hate that?” 

I mean, obviously there are other takes on the character, I can easily see a version where Newt would be delighted to become a , but based on his (deleted scene) confrontation with Raleigh I’ve always personally headcanoned Newt as a bit anti-Jaeger pilot, seeing them as the manifestations of Earth’s instinct to “shoot first, ask questions later” that is constantly getting in the way of his work being, y’know, effective at finding some other way to solve this massive invasion Earth is going through!

So I thought, “Yeah, it would be funny. Y’know what would be even funnier? Newt and Hermann doing the stick fight battle.” And thus the fic was born.

After that, I got really excited to write it because IRL I’m a bit of a fight junkie, as they say in the LARPing world. Over the years I’ve done 1) boxing 2) kickboxing 3) historically accurate (as in, not for the stage) longsword choreography 4) full-contact (foam weapon) LARP combat 5) bujinkan ninjutsu 6) and olympic-style foil fencing. I’ve been itching to find a place in one of my fics to put some of this knowledge to the test without it coming off as preachy or overly technical, so such a fic would be the perfect opportunity!

It was a real delight to write Newt and Hermann getting their own version of Mako and Raleigh’s famous fight scene (albeit a comical version because Newt does nothing but scream and run around dodging). Such a fight is also possible in this fic because Hermann does not have the limp, with the conceit being that it’s more that he doesn’t have it yet and in fact avoids ever getting it as compared to the canon timeline. Another Jaeger pilot, Stefan, is briefly mentioned as being 60% compatible with Hermann and “built like a Mr. World contestant”. I envisioned him as the person who deliberately broke Hermann’s hip after they got paired together in a malicious effort to get a different partner. Newt joining the academy prevents that event from occurring in this timeline.

So, Hermann is at this point is a pretty lean, mean, twenty-six year old fighting machine with a lot to prove. He’s been dreaming his whole adult life about being a Jaeger pilot, so needless to say he’s pretty good at this whole stick-fighting thing. Hermann’s expertise and exacting nature allowed me to include discussions of a bunch of the forms and stances I learned from longsword choreography. Basically, Hermann is fighting in many of the descriptions in (ironically) the Medieval German-style longsword form, which bears some resemblance to kendo (there are only so many ways to hit someone with a longsword so the similarities between those very different styles is often, heh, striking). 

One anecdote from the fight in the fic that I realy enjoyed including is, “What would be the score, out of five, between two fencing masters? 5 to 5? No, zero to zero. Because two masters would fight one another to a standstill without scoring a point.” This is a true story I was told by one of my teachers back when I was fencing. Like Newt in the fic, I guessed 5-5. But the fact it’s zero to zero got me thinking.

I went back and re-watched the Mako vs. Raleigh fight and developed a theory. Maybe scoring a point in that fight isn’t a sign of success, it’s a sign of a loss in the true aim of the fight. After all, the true goal of the match is to discover compatibility, not defeat your opponent. 

If you and your opponent are well matched and compatible, neither of you should ever score on one another at all. Thus it is the length the fight goes without someone scoring on the other that would determine Drift compatibility. In essence, your high score is actually how many times you block or dodge one another, which indicates you anticipated the other’s movements. A hit or a successful strike, even against your opponent, indicates a failure and a lower score on your Drift compatibility rating. 

Thus, in that fight, when Newt successfully dodges Hermann’s attacks for a half hour (btw, a truly insane length of time to be fighting, most Medieval duels lasted under five minutes), even when Hermann is a much more skilled duelist, they are still found to be insanely Drift compatible. After all, it would have been silly and out of character for Newt to be able to match Hermann when Hermann’s been practicing so hard and taking this so seriously, and while the Newt of this fic is a pacifist (there is a note that his bar fight earlier in the story is the first one he’s ever been in). But, because they’re so compatible, Newt is able to visualize Hermann’s movements before they happen and successfully avoid them even while in panic mode, and while having a screaming argument.

Because you absolutely cannot write these two without the screaming arguments, lol. Fight scenes have always been a classic place to mirror physical sparring with verbal sparring, and in a way it’s a send-up to GDT’s intention with the stick fight scene in the movie and how it mirrors Hermann and Newt’s verbal fights. Not only can these two have a perfect match in which no point is scored, they can also do so while name-calling one another and airing all their dirty relationship laundry for everyone in the Shatterdome to hear XD 

It’s one of the scenes I’m most proud of writing so I had a lot of fun getting to babble about it, thank you so much!

[blueskyheadleft010]

Analysis of Stevenbomb: Wanted

There be spoilers under the cut

Ok, so first off I want to say that I am very pleased with this strong narrative Season 5 has started with and am dying for the next episode(s) to come out even though we have none scheduled as of yet. (I swear to goodness it better not be an entire month before we get another episode I’ll be frothing at the mouth and dying by then).

I’ll go ahead and skip analyzing Stuck Together since it aired early and most of the internet has already seen it. Having said that, let’s proceed to The Trial.

While there’s a lot to say about this episode, I’ll try my best to summarize it as just WOW.

True to her word, Rebecca has done it again by giving the fandom exactly what it has been waiting for since Jailbreak Season 1. A meeting of the Diamonds with Steven acting as a key factor. To be honest, I was honestly surprised we were getting straight to the point with this episode, seeing how Steven just sorta decided to surrender at the last moment in I am my Mom, but I’m grateful the Crewniverse wastes no time throwing us into the hellfire of a 6,000-year-old grudge against Rose Quarts as we finally get to see exactly what roles the Diamonds play on Homeworld.

I absolutely adored Zircon in this scene; trying her best to be a good lawyer and losing her cool, and yeah I get the show’s ‘logic’ is supposed to for kids, but honestly her dialogue had me raising an eyebrow or two as she tried to state her case, and I think even Steven knew she was getting nowhere with her argument.

Speaking of that, the attitudes that the different Zircons and Pearls have towards their own kind ruled under different Diamonds was an interesting little bit of information that clearly shows gems don’t seem to find ‘compassion’ and ‘friendship at the top of their list; at least when it comes to other gems ruled under another Diamond. (I also loved how Y-Pearl typed her entry in, while B-Pearl drew pictures. :3)

Adding Lars in for the trial was an interesting touch that I think surprised just about everyone, seeing how up until now he hasn’t really been significant to the plot other than for comedic relief and furthering Steven’s own maturity. I like how he’s just sorta dragged around by the gems, yet is still allowed to do his own thing to an extent. (So long as he doesn’t interfere with whatever the gems are doing). Seeing how he helps keep Steven grounded and focused on the mission I think is what makes him an important plot piece in the episode, as otherwise I think Steven would be very overwhelmed without a direct goal in mind. (And that goal is saving Lars and getting out of there.)

Blue Zircon really makes her debut after the brief court recess, as she finally gets her act together after Steven provides her with some actual evidence, and completely turns the tables around as she goes as far as to accuse the Diamonds of sabotage based on the factual evidence and eye witness accounts.

Here’s something I found funny. Eyeball as a witness. She had no real reason to be there, and frankly made herself look even worse when she admitted Steven healed her during the trial. Why would a Diamond shatterer heal an enemy gem? ;) Still, it was a nice little touch the Crewniverse added for comedic effect and I loved it all the same.

I’ll wrap it up by saying that Yellow seemed pretty mad to be accused of treason, though I have my suspicions that she’s not the real culprit here, nor is Blue. (Though dang Blue’s emotion manipulating abilities are something to be afraid out.) It might be White, since she’s not been seen yet, and she may not even exist I’m just spit balling, or it might be a color switching/shapeshifting alien/gem? We’ve never seen before.

Point is, Rose is pretty much confirmed to not be the killer of Pink Diamond. I’d bet my two cents that she loved PD, and that Pink was actually trying to help humans. :O

Off Colors

Oh you sneaky writers, you ;)

I really like how the title not only foreshadows Lars’ death, but is also a slang term for ‘defect’ on Homeworld, which I never guessed either would be canon in my wildest dreams.

So, we basically meet 3 new gems (8/9/10 ½ ??? If you count the fusions and whatnot) and Lars becomes a hardcore hero who sacrifices himself to save his new friends.

I have to give props to Lars for doing what he did, seeing how he’d basically been a yellow-belly this entire time and only ran away from his problems. Honestly I expected him to do the same this time around, but when I watched him interact with the defects I realized that he saw something he’d never expected to see in those gems. Himself. And why is this significant?

Let me put this in perspective for ya,

Have you ever looked at an old photo of yourself doing something either embarrassing or something that reminds you of a darker time in your life and go, “If only I had a time machine and could go back and tell myself not to do ‘x’ or that life will get better if you just hang on a bit longer… Then life would be so much better for the both of us.” This is Lars seeing his past-self reflected in these, scared, defenseless gems, who have no one to help them.

So this is why Lars decides to become courageous and be the hero he’s always wished he could be but was too afraid to act, and goes ape sh*t on the robonoids because he knows he’s the only line of defense they’ve got.

So ya, needless to say I’m very proud of Lars for sticking up for himself and protecting the defects from Homeworld.

(Also A+ writing for the team thinking about Lars being ‘invisible’ to the Robonoid’s scanners and using that against them! It was amazing and heroic and alkjfhdgjkdhfjgkhfj!)

Lars’ Head

So a bit of a misleading title, but understandable given it’s hard to explain what’s just occurred in a few short words while simultaneously not spoiling the episode. (Even though everyone already knows that Lars is Pink Lion 2.0 from the previous episode).

So wow, again I never expected this to be a canon thing in the SUniverse.

I can’t really express the excitement I got when Lars was revived by Steven, the team discussing death (briefly and without literally saying that word ‘death’ just ‘away from life’), and Lars is PINK now. (And has what I assume is a BA permanent eye scar, along with the fact his ear lobes are probably stretched out forever now hahahaha sucks to be you Lars! ;D)

I think Lars accurately summed up everyone’s thoughts when he asked Steven “Am I a zombie now?!?” because let’s face it, yes Lars, you are in fact a very, very, magical pink zombie. J

So yeah, let’s talk about the defect gems for a second since I totes forgot about them in favor of paying attention to my Pink Son for a moment.

We’ve got the Twins of Rutile, Rhodonite, Flourite, and  Padparadscha Sapphire (Which I’m gonna call P-Sapphire for now).

The twins are rather interesting, as they seem to be the most level-headed of the team, as well as quite possibly two of the brighter gems in the group. I just really love how they don’t seem to be all that concerned about their appearance, and more concerned about the group, which really shows how compassionate they are in comparison to some of the other characters on the show which are way more hung up on their looks than caring for others.

Rhodonite wasn’t a major shocker for me, seeing how we’ve already been filled in about Garnet’s past, but it did raise some eyebrows about how two gems fused on Homeworld and weren’t shattered right away for doing so, just merely replaced. I think theirs’s a lot more to their story the Crewniverse didn’t have time to put in, but hopefully somewhere along the lines we’ll see her again and get to know more about the two of them.

Flourite is… Interesting. Besides the obvious fact that she looks like the Hookah smoking caterpillar from Alice in Wonderland, her personality and combination of gems is so distinct from the others that it’s amazing she’s actually a stable fusion. I get the underlying theme is polyamory for her, but besides that it’s something else to see such a massive fusion remain so gentle and kind while not bickering between herself since she’s got like 6 or 8 gems… Sidenote: something interesting I wanted to point out was how slow Flourite talks when she’s speaking, and one can only assume that’s because of how many gems she’s comprised of, which is fascinating. It speaks volumes that the more gems involved in a fusion, the more time it seems to take to sync up thoughts and even actions, as demonstrated by Flourite’s behavior.

Lastly, P-Sapphire. A classic Rosalina appearance with a heart of gold. I’m really curious to know how the heck she survived this long and how she found this rag-tag misfit of gems since she can only predict the recent past, as she seems to constantly be stuck in her visions as demonstrated by her actions. Regardless, she’s still really cute and I love how eager and excited she is about everything, so hopefully we’ll get to see her character arc grow past just comedic relief.

Anyways, back to Lars. The fact that Lars is essentially a portal home is cool enough, but when Steven steps inside it’s shown he’s got his own tree in there too. So I get Rose can do plant stuff, which explains the tree on? in? Lars, but what I don’t understand is the portal power since it doesn’t seem to be connected to either of her abilities.

The fact Rebecca decided to leave the defects and Lars on Homeworld was a surprise, but an understandable one, not for the story’s sake, but because trying to fit Flourite through Lars’ hair would be a nightmare that I don’t think anyone would want to explain.

So Steven discovers he’s a necromancer and that Lion’s his undead slave pet, and then the gems and Connie and Greg all show up just in time to have a reunion and happy tears are shed. (And then Steven proceeds to eat everything in sight, prompting Greg to go out and buy the boy some more bread lol).

So much has been left out in the open, and I get the distinct feeling this is gonna be the least season for this show. L Still, I feel like everything’s gonna be amazing when we get the next episode, so for now I’m rather content. :D

[ntrending]

"First Man" is astonishingly accurate--here's how NASA helped

New Post has been published on https://nexcraft.co/first-man-is-astonishingly-accurate-heres-how-nasa-helped/

"First Man" is astonishingly accurate--here's how NASA helped

NOTE: this article discusses pivotal plot points from the movie First Man. You have been warned.

Long before the advent of modern rocketry, filmmakers were enamored with space, dreaming up wild adventures far from Earth’s surface to the delight of audiences around the world. But a number of space films have looked to reality instead of science fiction for their dramatic narratives: 1983’s The Right Stuff, 1995’s Apollo 13, 2016’s Hidden Figures, and last weekend’s First Man, to name a few.

Conjuring the dawn of space exploration decades later can be a challenge, but Hollywood had some help in making those films as accurate as possible. NASA is an archival treasure trove for screenwriters and filmmakers looking to produce a project on its missions. The agency’s Bert Ulrich, Multimedia Liaison, Film and TV Collaborations, is the guy you go to if you’re looking to dig into NASA history. As he is for for many productions about space, Ulrich was instrumental in assisting First Man screenwriter Josh Singer and director Damien Chazelle in telling Armstrong’s story with the utmost accuracy.

As Multimedia Liaison, Ulrich receives proposals from hundreds of writers, producers, and directors each year, and he’s tasked with deciding which films and shows the agency will work with. In 2017 alone, he provided assistance on 143 documentaries, 25 feature films, and 41 TV shows, coordinating interviews, film shoots on NASA property, and archival research. “One of the great legacies of NASA is the assets that we have: the footage and photos and other details in our historical archives,” says Ulrich. One of the scripts he helped shepherd through the system was a draft of First Man by Singer.

Based on the only authorized biography of Armstrong by James R. Hansen, which shares the same title, First Man doesn’t just follow the narrative of the first lunar landing, but takes a long, hard look at Armstrong as an individual man. “Accuracy is just super important to us because we knew it was important to the Armstrong family, and we knew it would’ve been important to Neil,” says Singer. “And also because we think this is a pretty provocative portrait of both Neil and of the program at the time.”

Singer visited NASA headquarters in Washington, D.C. to meet with Ulrich and Chief Historian Bill Barry for advice on the script. “They gave me more books than I can carry,” laughs Singer, who then traveled the country to visit different NASA facilities and interview a number of people who worked either directly with Armstrong or on the missions he served on. “We wanted to make sure that the Armstrong family was on board, too,” notes Ulrich, so he coordinated Singer’s interviews with Janet Armstrong, Neil’s ex-wife; his sons, Mark and Rick; and his sister, June. When the family gave the okay to move forward with the project, believing the portrayal of Armstrong to be accurate, NASA officially signed on as a consultant to the film.

“NASA was incredibly helpful,” says Singer, not only during the writing process (in one case, Singer was able to fly a simulation of Armstrong’s X-15 flight that opens the film in order to write it as realistically as possible, as well as interview the last living X-15 pilot, Joe Engle), but also during filming. “Damien [Chazelle] made an effort to do as much practical shooting as possible,” says Singer. Using NASA’s plans, models—and in some cases, the actual equipment—the crew physically built models of spacecraft, planes, and other machinery for the film. For instance, the scene where the Lunar Landing Research Vehicle malfunctions and nearly kills Armstrong—a true event—was filmed using a model that ejected bursts of steam while being swung around from a crane. The production team also built the multi-axis trainer that spun the astronauts to dizzying speeds. “It probably didn’t work exactly the same as the real one, but it could spin in all three directions, and it was visually an exact replica,” says Singer.

Visuals aside, NASA also was essential in creating the authentic sounds the audience hears throughout the film, providing sound artists with access to Gemini and Apollo spacesuits. “They recorded the zipper going up and down, and they stuck mics inside the helmets to record airflow,” says Singer. The writer also spent time with astronauts going over every detail about the sounds during a launch. “Frank Hughes, when he saw the Gemini lift off for the first time, he said, ‘You know there’s this funny thing with the Titan. When it first pushes off it does this chirp,’” notes Singer. “We didn’t originally have it in there, but we found it and put it in.”

It wasn’t just NASA that helped with the accuracy of the film. The space community at large chipped in. “For our Gemini 8 cockpit, the console was actually built by a hobbyist who had been in love with Gemini since he was a kid,” says Singer. “It’s an exact match.” NASA did step in to help figure out what the purpose of all those buttons on the console, though: Frank Hughes, who trained the Apollo astronauts, was also a Gemini expert, and he sat down with Singer to go through each and every one. Hughes also helped Singer translate the communications recordings, or comms, of each mission. “We can listen to these comms, but being able to actually understand what’s going on is a different thing entirely,” says Singer. “I asked Frank to help me add just a little bit of dialogue to help people understand what’s going on when the comms aren’t transparent.”

Other help came from the general public when the trailers were released. On one occasion, space historians contacted the team to let them know that they had the Gemini 8 thrusters all wrong. “We had to redo that completely with visual effects,” says Singer.

While NASA and the space community at large were essential to determining the accuracy of the practical aspects of the film, it was the Armstrong family and the astronauts that were perhaps the most important key to unlocking Armstrong’s personality. In writing the official biography, Hansen spent hours with the Armstrongs, including Neil himself. “I think Jim [Hansen] gets at Neil in a way no one else has,” says Singer. “He really went pretty deep, and then we went deeper still.”

In the film, Armstrong is portrayed as a reticent man, particularly following the loss of his daughter Karen, who died of cancer when she was two, as well as the deaths of his fellow astronauts throughout his career. “He was not a guy who was gregarious and would come towards you—you had to come towards him,” says Singer. “And, if you did, you’d get to that wry sense of humor and that big smile. But he was tightly packaged emotionally, which is how Jim describes him in the book. His sons said you’d ask him a question, and often times he just wouldn’t answer. And Janet said ‘no’ was a loquacious argument for Neil.”

There is one part of the film that’s not based in fact, but informed conjecture—the moment Armstrong drops his daughter Karen’s bracelet into the Little West Crater on the surface of the moon. In the real-life sequence of events on the moon, Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin went through a carefully choreographed series of movements, save for a brief moment when Armstrong went off script to stand at the edge of the crater. Hansen, after spending years with the Armstrongs, speculated that, perhaps at this moment, the astronaut had left something of Karen’s behind.

As climbers do on Mount Everest, many moon astronauts placed mementos or tokens of loved ones and lost ones at the apex of their journey, so it’s not unreasonable to suspect such an event occurred. It’s not something Armstrong ever confirmed himself—unsurprising, given how private a man he was. “But [Hansen] went directly to June Hoffman, Neil’s sister, who he felt knew Neil just about as well as anyone in the world,” says Singer. “He asked June, ‘Do you think Neil might have left something of Karen’s on the moon?’ And June said, ‘Oh, I dearly hope so.’”

For Singer and Chazelle, First Man is a chance to tell a side of the moon landing story we don’t often hear. “We’re really trying to nudge the history a little bit,” says Singer. “The issue I have with the conventional tellings that have sugarcoated the early years of the space program is that it makes us feel like it was easy. I think achievement is very hard, and achievements of this nature require great sacrifice. The cost to the astronauts, in particular, was a lot bigger than has been depicted in the history books.”

Written By Stefanie Waldek