#the benefit too of writing the story for it's own sake means i haven't been overly critical

[thehardkandy]

I'm really glad I decided to finish Exordia this morning because it did lead to just about 7 hours of writing (+lunch break and dog walk) so that I was able to do a short story front to back ~3300 words.

Feels like a bit W because the last short I did was October, which is still much more recent than the one before it had been (though I've had a few abortive attempts at getting past the first 20k of a book in there)

I spent a lot of the winter depressed and struggling to find the joy in doing something for it's own sake, so I've been trying to really push myself toward the parts of writing that have me looking back on my own writing fondly. Because even without plans for publishing stuff there is so much of my writing that I think my life is better for having written

I feel very good about what I wrote today, so hopefully I'll keep doing this small stuff

I'll say an especial shout-out to the Penric novellas, the cemeteries of amalo books, and Exordia for really making me feel that extra fondness for books and writing lately

[livesincerely]

So recently I remembered a funny story, and I thought you might like to hear it. So anyway--curtains up, scene opens, and there I am a year ago, sitting myself down and making the executive decision that it's been Too Long since I last listened to the Newsies soundtrack. Which obviously just wouldn't do, so I went to youtube and thumbed up the The World Will Know scene from the movie. Keep in mind at the time I hadn't seen the full movie since I was like five, and so thirty fucking seconds in I'm doing the emotional equivalent of scrambling for my glasses because that's thirty damn measly seconds of time it took for my poor ol' soul to be convinced of javid. And then I felt dumb for never noticing it before. Unsurprisingly, a few days later found me lying in bed with my phone and red eyes at ass oclock in the morning, well and truly hooked. And I found this fanfic. This fanfic that I haven't been able to get out of my head since, this fanfic that so aptly used the lingo of the time and place and so perfectly seemed to sum up the characters, this fanfic that inspired me to attempt to write my own javid fic (for both our sakes, we will not speak of it). I wanted the whole world to know about this fanfic, this beautiful piece of prose with a bruised and bloody Davey and an overprotective Jack, with friends that you could tell really cared and maybe possibly saw more than they let on. And then I found another fanfic, similarly perfect, except this time I got the added benefit of reading about a Jack who was way smitten with the beautiful blue eyes of his gorgeous best friend. (I still quote this one line about 'lemons' and 'convincing' and 'sweet' daily.) And then I found one about getting back together, about apologies and misunderstandings. All these, of course, I found while scrolling through ao3, because clicking into the author's actual page never crossed my tiny mind. None of the other javid fics on ao3 ever punched me in the throat quite the same, though, and eventually other hyperfixations came calling, and Jack and Davey and the other wonderful little shits were cast to the back of the line. So imagine my surprise, months later, when I fell into a reading slump and remembered the shiny, stunning javid fics I read all those weeks ago and went back to read them only to find that they were all written by the same author? LiveSincerely, the man the myth the legend. (I cried that day because I'm too emotionally unstable for shit like this and that's just the way the cookie crumbles.) Hey, dude. It's been a minute since I dropped by to say anything, and I think you deserve to know how much your stories mean to me and the rest of us greedy little javid rats. I hope you've been well--not too busy, not too bored, but that you've made yourself a cozy little Goldilocks. You deserve it. (Also, please tell me you've watched Our Flag Means Death?)

Holy shit dude. I’m just sitting here, like I do not know what to say, wow, wow, wow, wow.

I mean

Wowwww

Okay I’m gonna try to be normal about this but I’m really just 🥰🥰🥰

So to answer your questions, I’m doing very well!!!! I’ve been really busy with work this month, but in a good way? It’s really fulfilling work and it’s always nice to be out doing theatre, especially after how rough these last few years have been.

I know I haven’t been updating as much now that I’m not in school, so thank you for checking in!!! I always really appreciate all the kind words/comments/tags, they brighten my day like you wouldn’t believe!!

Thank you 💗

[madara-fate]

I also wasn't insinuating that MinaKushi or DanTsu are the only good examples of good romantic relationships (I don't even care about these pairing for the record, or any other pairing in Naruto). I'm just pointing out that people do not doubt that Minato loves Kushina or that Dan loves Tsunade. If Sasuke genuinely loved Sakura and Kishimoto did a good job at showing it, then there would not be a huge debate on whether he does love her or not, because it would be obvious to pretty much everyone that he does, whether they like the ship or not. The fact that it's not and that so many people still debate on this to this day either shows that Kishimoto did a poor job at showing Sasuke as a loving husband either that Sasuke does not love her, despite that "love is the real deal" line or his reply to Sarada's question. It's show vs tell if you know what I mean. On one hand he tells us that "love is the real deal" but on the other hand he does not really show it all too well, which makes many people think whether he truly meant those words or he was being sarcastic and simply mocked the fans. It's either a case of bad writing either Sasuke simply does not love Sakura. I personally don't know what to think. I tend to lean towards the first option, it may just be bad writing after all. He admitted he's not great at writing romance and to be honest? It shows. It is even implied they haven't kissed in Gaiden by Sakura looking sad when Sarada asked her if they ever kissed. And I know you like to refute that by saying that it's preposterous to think they haven't kissed when they obviously had sex in order to concieve Sarada, but the thing is, it is entirely possible to have sex with someone but not kiss. It really is. When you're having sex but you're not really enjoying it or when you have simply been pressured and pestered into having sex with a person. Sakura Hiden confirmed the fact that Sakura was determined to confess her feelings to Sasuke over and over again until he would've eventually reciprocated. She compared that with punching a villain over and over until they're defeated. Now please tell me, would it be so far fetched to consider that harassment? If someone tells you no once, you have to respect their rejection and stop pursuing them, not take it as a challenge to persist in reaffirming your feelings over and over again until they eventually get tired or take pity in you and accept to give you a chance. And even in Gaiden it was confirmed that Sakura had to chase after Sasuke. It's really easy to see this ship as... problematic, to say the least. I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt tho and blame it on bad writing rather than on Kishimoto simply implying SS is not really a loving relationship, but if other people are not convinced or deny that Sasuke loves Sakura, you have to let your bias aside and admit that they have reasons to believe that. The writing makes it really easy to interpret it either way, depending on your preferences.

I already answered a lot of the points you made here in my response to your previous ask, but it's important for people to remember the type of person Sasuke is, and understand that the manner in which he shows affection isn't the same as Dan or Minato. It's a lot more subtle. Are people doubting that Vegeta loves Bulma and Trunks? No, so then people need to ask themselves - in which ways has Vegeta demonstrated that he loves his family in ways that Sasuke hasn't? Both of them aren't outwardly affectionate, both of them aren't romantic, but both of them have undoubtedly demonstrated that they love their family. Yet, only one of them is questioned. It really is just a "damned if you do and damned if you don't" situation. If Sasuke acts all affectionate like Dan and Minato, people will claim that he's OOC (like they did for Sasuke Retsuden), but if he stays reserved and demonstrates affection in his own way, people will just turn a blind eye and say he doesn't care. It really just shows how little they actually know Sasuke's character. To think that Sasuke, who hails from the clan which values love above all else, would marry and start a family with someone he doesn't love.

On one hand he tells us that "love is the real deal" but on the other hand he does not really show it all too well, which makes many people think whether he truly meant those words or he was being sarcastic and simply mocked the fans.

People actually think that Kishi may have been "sarcastic" when he described their love as the real deal. Oh my goodness. Why would Kishi purposely give wrong information to the readers (and never reveal what's actually going on)? Why would he intentionally want the readers to misunderstand his story and characters? Why would he want to portray his 2nd biggest character as someone who would enter a loveless marriage when that literally goes against the ways of his clan and his entire character? Do people not listen to themselves?

It's like how so many people claim that Sasuke saying "because you exist" means that the only reason he and Sakura are still together is because of Sarada, and people really don't realise how stupid that sounds. They don't stop and ask themselves why Sarada would be brought to happy tears, why Chouchou would describe her as lucky, and why Naruto would give her a knowing smile, if Sasuke had really just insinuated that she was the only thing that was keeping her parents together:

They just don't think. They apparently believe that Chouchou was happily thinking to herself "aww, lucky Sarada, you're the only thing keeping your parents together!", and that makes sense to them apparently, Chouchou being so happy for Sarada after hearing such awful news. It's unbelievable.

And I know you like to refute that by saying that it's preposterous to think they haven't kissed when they obviously had sex in order to conceive Sarada, but the thing is, it is entirely possible to have sex with someone but not kiss. It really is. When you're having sex but you're not really enjoying it or when you have simply been pressured and pestered into having sex with a person.

This is just like the people who believe that Sasuke is gay, justifying their ridiculous claims by pointing out how "you can be gay and still marry a woman", and to that I always say - Why would Sasuke do that? Just like to you I'll say - Why would Sasuke do that? To have sex and not kiss? Why would Sasuke of all people be "pressured and pestered" into entering a relationship with someone? He obviously has no problem whatsoever with bluntly turning people down. If he doesn't want to do something, he's not gonna do it. Heck, if you're using Sakura Hiden to try and prove your points then I'll also use a novel to prove this one - The lipstick stain scene during Sasuke Shinden: The Teacher's Star Pupil, explicitly indicates that Sakura and Sasuke had kissed earlier that day. The motorbike scene during Naruto Retsuden has Sakura kiss Sasuke. Sasuke and Sakura having kissed, is not (and has never been) a topic that's open to discussion.

Sakura Hiden confirmed the fact that Sakura was determined to confess her feelings to Sasuke over and over again until he would've eventually reciprocated. She compared that with punching a villain over and over until they're defeated. Now please tell me, would it be so far fetched to consider that harassment? If someone tells you no once, you have to respect their rejection and stop pursuing them, not take it as a challenge to persist in reaffirming your feelings over and over again until they eventually get tired or take pity in you and accept to give you a chance. And even in Gaiden it was confirmed that Sakura had to chase after Sasuke.

I've already talked at length about that scene from Sakura Hiden so I won't do so again here, but I'll link the relevant post where I explained how that scene obviously was not meant to be taken as a negative comment, but people will of course just twist things in order to suit their own anti Sakura/SS agenda.

But if other people are not convinced or deny that Sasuke loves Sakura, you have to let your bias aside and admit that they have reasons to believe that. The writing makes it really easy to interpret it either way, depending on your preferences.

No, here's what people need to understand. If people think that Sasuke's love towards Sakura was not adequately shown, then that's a reason to criticise the writing. It is not however, a reason to deny what is canon. They are stating that Sasuke does not love Sakura, despite the fact that this has explicitly been stated. Sasuke loving Sakura is a canon fact, whether they like it or not. Criticise the execution all you want, I know I have plenty of times, but don't deny the truth. Hell, since you wanted to use the novels...

During Sakura Hiden, Sasuke rushed back for Sakura's sake, despite having ignored the village's prior pleas for help. What does that say about his feelings for her?

During Akatsuki Hiden, Sasuke described Sakura as "The Spring Sunshine" which illuminated his dark life. What does that say about his feelings for her?

What does basically the entirety of Sasuke Retsuden say about his feelings for her?

Many anti SS fans are always so quick to use the novels when it suits them. And then when a novel like Sasuke Retsuden comes along and completely shits over all their theories, they're just as quick to dismiss the novel as an OOC fan fic by a sub par author, figures. As far as I'm concerned, the manga is more than enough to show that Sasuke loves his family (seriously this really isn't up for debate), but I'll also definitely say that anyone who criticises SS and uses the novels as a point of reference, is in way over their heads.

[wowsoboring]

Deconstructing Baseless Harry Potter Arguments#2 (i) : Harmione Edition

Obviously I once again do not mean to target all Harmione shippers. I know quite a few who're very good human beings and tolerant and accepting above all. However these aren't. In this case, you might sense quite a bit of levelheadedness in the beginning, however you must not be fooled as it goes south and takes a nasty turn very quickly. Don't get your hopes up, this is some of the worst shit I've ever seen, especially the way in which it progresses through its course. Naturally, for this post I have picked my own style of writing which will match that of those redditors. Reddit is the perfect breeding ground for all these weird cults, honestly. I shall be resorting to a formal language and style of conversation, very much like a debater would to sound as pretentious as these do. These posts are found on the instagram handle toxicharmonyshippers who gather such toxic musings and sayings for Harmione shippers while respecting the ones that are nice.

1)

Oh yes, let's use words like 'vehemently' to sound smart, why not? Of course, this little tidbit of the highly stupendous post seems more or less civil at the start. They also have the common decency to say "some Romione shippers" rather than generalizing all of us. Very nice of you, how very saint like. Let's wait till they drop the act and show us their true colors. Harkening back to the argument, I have but one question for you, "where do you find these people?". Where's the proof? Who are these radical Romione shippers who worship Ron and dislike Hermione? I haven't seen any such shippers and I am surrounded by Romione shippers on tumblr, instagram and fan fiction sites as well and haven't met the people you speak of. Some point out her flaws, yes, but no one hates her or dislikes her that much. I have seen two or three Romione shippers across hundreds and thousands who're skeptical of Hermione's perfection. Skeptical. Not hating, disliking, or anything. Of course, unlike this person, I have evidence: find these pi charts for your referral (clickable): https://imgur.com/a/QfPnQbB

you can, through these, see the amount of Hermione bashing across Harry Potter fanfiction and you can see that even in Romione fanfiction there's more Ron bashing. Hermione-bashing is a non-issue. That's what it is. Regarding the "nagging" statement, where's the lie in that? "Annoying" is somewhat subjective, I personally don't find her annoying at all. Who are these people and how often do you find them? "Mary Sue" is only reserved for Movie!Hermione. I have only seen book fans call her that. No one has ever called Book!Hermione Mary Sue. The movie does paint her as a flawless, all-rounder who's also drop-dead gorgeous. Only things she's bad at are flying and divination, all of which she denounces as useless, even though flying is like biking for wizards, divination, sure, not that important. with a teacher like Trelawney, even I would denounce it as hokum.

2)

Remember what I said about waiting for them to show us their true colors, well here they are. Bask in the glory of their senseless arguments. Why, I am from reddit, heck I have 25 thousand karma points on there, I just left because it was too stupid for me but I can argue like them very well. And in this case I would like to say that these people are under the impression that Ron is just there in the story for the sake of existence. And he doesn't work hard. That argument is of course, wrong. Because Ron (in no particular order):

1) fights a troll when he's 11

2) is willing to sacrifice himself when he's 11

3) stands up for his friends

4) makes sure Harry feels like he belongs in the family

5) worries about Harry and rescues him from literal jail

6) stands up against Draco rather than by-standing and enabling his behavior

7) tries his level best to make sure Norbert the dragon is in safe hands and carries it out, albeit not in perfection

8) is with Harry every step of the way in his confronting the basilisk

9) sends Harry and Hermione long letters and calls them often to check up on them

10) stands up on a bitten leg to defend his best friend

11) always apologizes for any of his mistakes and is forgiving when others wrong him

12) works his way to join the Quidditch team unlike Draco who most certainly bought his way in

13) destroys at least 2 horcruxes

14) finds out how to defeat a horcrux

15) has an excellent enough memory and observation to notice Harry speaking parseltongue and also using it to his benefit which proves he's resourceful

now since I have 8 more such pictures to rebut and I do have a life, I will stop. These aren't even a twelfth of the remarkable things Ron has done though, so rest assured.

oh wait what did you say about him just existing and not working for anything? If I recall correctly, he did just as well as Harry did in school and didn't score well only in subjects he didn't care about. Which is true for most people except for Hermione who has an eidetic memory which not everyone has, understandably. Rote memorization is not the best way to get by in life, by the way.

what are the "so many reasons" behind why Harry is the best fit for Hermione? Kindly share so I can rebut those too, I'm rather free nowadays, my finals have been cancelled. You say there are so many reasons but don't even give one, yet you want me to take you seriously. I'm afraid that's impossible.

Romione shipper here, i don't dislike Hermione. I haven't met or seen many people in the book!romione fandom who dislike Hermione (except for Movie!Hermione). The question of someone you like ending up with someone you dislike doesn't particularly make sense. In Friends, Chandler ends up with Monica: now I'm not the biggest Monica fan (I don't hate her but I don't like her very much either) but they are my favorite couple because they make sense. It's about compatibility and character traits, not liking or disliking because that's just a set-up for a ghastly invitation for people to pair up hideousness. "Oh yeah, I like Harry and I also like Hagrid, they should be together. I mean it would be very very disgusting but that's my logic, now, you can't fight it. "- that's how you sound. Please read what you write. Your logic is just...abysmal. That's all I can say without breaking my resolve and berating you with colorful profanities.

3)

This is without the doubt, the easiest one to rebut. It's a delight to see such terrible arguments at my disposal. Come on, dear Harmione shippers, write something that makes me question my choices, not things that make me scoff in disbelief.

In this case, you're essentially providing us with theories. Unproved theories and speculation of what you believe because you'd say anything you like. Where's the proof of your theory, though? Where is that crazy radical Romione shipper who does this? Kindly show me these people. Oh yes, you wanna say we objectify Hermione and disrespect her and view her as a prize. This aches me, that you believe this. No one has ever insinuated this, ever, in the history of anything. What is this winner-loser theory? How do you round off Harry Potter to "an alpha-male ends up with lead-lady" trope and still say you're a fan of the series? Harry Potter doesn't fit in with that format. Ron, Hermione and Harry are co-heroes. Similar to how there's no main character in Friends or the Heroes of Olympus series or the Avengers. We're not living in the 80s anymore. Hermione will be a hero, invariably whether she ends up with Harry, Ron or no one. She ends up with Ron and that's it. Talking about her like this doesn't make you sound any better either. Now you're calling me a misogynist because I don't support the ship of two people who describe themselves as siblings. That's very mature of you. Well here's the thing- I'm not a misogynist. It's as simple as that. I believe that women are capable of anything and everything. I believe Hermione is an amazing person and she is a hero and a different person. I believe the series would be impossible without her. I believe she is no one's prize. There's no requirement of a prize. I just think, similar to canon and the truth and her romantic interest, she will have a great relationship with Ron. There's nothing complex or deep about it, really. No personal weird-thing, no psychological complex, no internalized misogyny. There's nothing deeper than what I said. I am not sexist. I am a feminist. I am all for women empowerment. I love women with the fabric of my being. I love Hermione. I think she's amazing. You only become sexist when you ship people with unstable power dynamics, a bully-victim relation or something of the sort. Neither Romione, nor Harmione are sexist. Heck if you paired Neville with Hermione you wouldn't be sexist. And I hate talking about this so much, I can't even tell you. This talk does make it sound like I treat Hermione like an object and I assure you I respect her and I normally won't talk like this unless someone just outright calls me sexist for something that's not sexist. And this is that situation.

4)

in the case of Romione, no one is too good for anyone. Both are amazing people who're heroes and have done amazing work. That's all I have to say. There's no league, they are romantically interested in each other. I have no intention on sounding lame, but, in love there is no league. As long as you're not putting in any effort and are extremely lazy and leech off of your partner, there is no such concept and no, Hermione is not "too good" for him. Unless of course you're talking about movie Hermione, who is too good for anyone.

5) (halftime!)

oh yes they try to pull this off and wonder why we hate them. Classic. This person likes to sound british, so let's switch up our language, yeah? At least then I won't be out of my element. Let me correct ya, Ron at his best is an amazing, loyal, friendly, brave, strategic hero. There you have it. Ron and 'git' can't be used in the same sentence. Now if you talk about Ron's achievements, I re-iterate you to point two. If it's too much work, here:

1) fights a troll when he's 11

2) is willing to sacrifice himself when he's 11

3) stands up for his friends

4) makes sure Harry feels like he belongs in the family

5) worries about Harry and rescues him from literal jail

6) stands up against Draco rather than by-standing and enabling his behavior

7) tries his level best to make sure Norbert the dragon is in safe hands and carries it out, albeit not in perfection

8) is with Harry every step of the way in his confronting the basilisk

9) sends Harry and Hermione long letters and calls them often to check up on them

10) stands up on a bitten leg to defend his best friend

11) always apologizes for any of his mistakes and is forgiving when others wrong him

12) works his way to join the Quidditch team unlike Draco who most certainly bought his way in

13) destroys at least 2 horcruxes

14) finds out how to defeat a horcrux

15) has an excellent enough memory and observation to notice Harry speaking parseltongue and also using it to his benefit which proves he's resourceful

hey, see, I like Ron and I took the time to copy-paste this instead of asking you to scroll up. And I'm a lot of bad things but I am not lazy. I stick to my deadlines like Hermione. I start my homework in library class and continue it during phys ed the day its given. And I am not exaggerating. Bloody hell, I wish I was. I'm the ceo of deadlines, mate, don't tempt me! So you can see that Ron is much more than just a "nice bloke". And being a "nice bloke" isn't a bad thing either. He's all the things I said: intuitive, strategic, helpful, loyal and on top of that he's also a nice person. Yes, I do see a bit of myself in Ron. I do. I see the insecure side. I waste my time hating myself and criticizing myself and undermining myself, telling me I'm no good. But Ron overcomes that. He inspires me to appreciate myself. Is that a bad thing? Are you going to shame me for having a low self-esteem? Do you want to worsen my low self-esteem and make me feel more like shit?

Now the person who replied to your comment saying, "he isn't a nice bloke most of time.", he is. He is not being nice twice in a span of 7 years. How often do you act rudely or with jealousy? Wasn't Harry yelling at everyone in caps lock in OOTP. Now I don't condemn him for that because he's a fucking hormonal teenager like me and that would make me a hypocrite, but by your logic why don't you condemn him? Or why not condemn Hermione for saying "I only date good Quidditch players" and shoving canaries at Ron's face because someone else kissed him, while she kept using Krum and Cormac to make him jealous. She wasn't being a nice girl, then, was she? Now, once again, i don't dislike her or hold that against her because guess what, mate, I'm a hormonal teenage girl who gets jealous most of the time and would probably react in a similar fashion in the spur of the moment (Not defending her actions here, just putting myself in her shoes.) In short, Ron is a nice bloke MOST OF THE TIME.

6)

It would be misogynistic to think that. The thing is, NO ONE DOES my dear friend! My dear daft friend. I have never heard anyone say that! why are you so hell-bent on portraying us as misogynists when no one ever says that? Stop assuming. Just stop. You are crossing a limit here, aren't you? Yes you are. You cannot say these sort of things. We never said that or believed that, no one ever said this to be a reason to ship Romione. God what is wrong with you? Literally, stop fucking ASSUMING god damn it! Do you want me to assume things about Harmione shippers? Do you want me to go there? Because I will go there! I will go there the moment you tell me to. Just challenge me.

Ron is not a perfect best boi , the reason why so many of us like him is that he's imperfect and tries to become better through the course of time. You are once again assuming and I am once again asking you to stop.

Ron might be an ordinary wizard. He might be poor, sure, but he's a pure-blood and won't face much if he chose not to fight. But he did. He fought. Now I identify with Ron's attitude a fair bit, but I am also likely to spend my day in a library without noticing. People aren't one dimensional. Stop trying to act like you're a psychologist, i know you're not. I don't even think Hermione's overbearing at all! You just insulted someone you're a big fan of. Jesus.

Both Hermione and Ron are strategic, jealous, passionate, feisty, argumentative, intellectual...

that's like 6 similarities. They aren't polar opposites in the slightest. Their differences are just: workaholic, not workaholic. Nerd, not a nerd. Like that's fucking it, man!

8)

being relaxed doesn't make you less independent or driven. A relaxed and levelheaded Hermione will think through things, not be impulsive, not panic etc. She doesn't need Ron. I don't understand your obsession with acting like we ever insinuated that. Then she doesn't need Harry either lol. Stop shipping her with Harry, then or like shut the fuck up. Being a bit relaxed won't stop her or anyone from hitting great strides. Just don't get relaxed to the point you're lazy and casual about everything, that's it.

9)

What do you mean? Ron is balanced. He does finish his work on time. And even if he does procrastinate, she could also help him not and be more driven. Of course, this is an open invitation for you to call me a sexist bitch because I said that she could help him and now you'll think her goal is to help him become better yada yada yada. Fuck off. Defeating the horcrux taught him enough. He respected her. He remembered about the elves when she didn't. He begged to be tortured instead of her. He wouldn't need it because school work and jobs are different and the same person might perceive those differently. Calmness and relaxation doesn't hinder your potential. Not caring and laziness does. You can't function if you work and are stressed 24/7 with zero breaks. Period.

10)

No i do not want (nor does anyone want) Hermione to become Ron. Being slightly calmer doesn't change up your personality. I'm sure many people dislike those sort of fanfics without a doubt. I hate OOC and I don't want Hermione to lose her intellect with Ron because that makes no sense. Ron himself is intellectual and loves arguing with her. They'd boost each other, more like it.

-------

okay thats it i am exhausted as fuck. thanks for reading, i appreciate it. notes and reblogs are appreciated, this takes work.

[honeethatsallshewrote]

Me and My Mental Health

What is this "mental health" you speak of Janine?

I'm glad you asked😊

Mental Health is a level of psychological well-being, this is somewhat different from emotional health which is having good control of your thoughts and feelings. So, your emotional health is pretty much 'a part of your mental health.'

But did you know that your metal health is actually probably a bit more important than your physical health? Now don't get me wrong, your physical health is just as important too, but think about it, a comatose is still alive and possibly physically well in some way, only their mind is in an unconscious state, making them almost, 'lifeless' so to speak. I am in no way saying they're dead, but without a healthy mind, were merely a vessel, a body without a host, a ship without a captain, a man without a woman....hehe jk, but you get the idea. Our mental health certainly is very important, and because of this, we need to do all we can to preserve it and keep it safe.

Now the next question is, how do we keep our minds safe? Well here are a few things you could do:

 STOP PROCRASTINATING

Yes, I'm talking to you Dom -_-

It is true what they say about procrastination being a thief. But some of you actually allow this thief to enter your minds... If you catch yourself procrastinating, find a way to stop. Be strong enough to walk away from that insensitive thief and make a change in your actions. Do your homework! If for some reason you're having a hard time focusing, listen to your thoughts. What is replaying in your mind so much that you can't focus? Is it important? Is it something that can wait until after you do your homework? If not, clear your conscience and do that thing now. You'll feel better later after accomplishing two things, when before you felt like you couldn’t even accomplish one.

 Learn to actually say no, when you don’t want to say yes

You don’t owe it to anyone to be perfect or a ‘people pleaser.’ If you want to say no, just say no. Would you rather sacrifice your mental health to be accepted by another person, especially one who probably disregards your mental health by trying to force you to do something you don't want to do? Now this doesn’t mean ‘be mean,’ it just means that with all generosity considered, if you feel as if saying yes will affect you negatively somehow, then don’t say yes. Be true to yourself, be strong for yourself, be thoughtful of yourself. It is not selfish to disagree with someone, it’s called individuality.

 Find a Passion and stick to it

Finding something that inspires and/ or drives you, can give you a sense of purpose, and as human beings having a purpose makes us feel like we are worth more than the dirt we were made from. I mean if dirt can give life then I gotta up my game. If you haven't found a passion yet, then you can try new things to see what interests you. Write a book, feed a cat, play an online game, write a song, cook a recipe, research endangered animals, tell someone a story, take pictures, share your experience with God, sew those pants up, sing a song to your friend, sing a song to a stranger, try yoga, dance, draw, make a YouTube channel, start a blog 😉 Whatever you do, just stay inside. Give yourself a challenge and stop sleeping around if you are. It will make you feel better. I promise.

 Physical Health

Eat healthy, get enough sleep, exercise or at least practice stretching. Your physical health can affect your mental health too.

Aside from keeping your body healthy, eating healthily also affects your mood and mental health. There is apparently some association between certain nutrients in food and our emotional well-being. These nutrients include omega-3 fatty acids, folic acid, vitamin D, magnesium, B vitamins, and tryptophan. Just eat ya’ fruits and veggies... and all the other foods from food groups that make up a balanced diet. Don’t believe me? Go see for yourself, click here.

Sleep is important for many brain functions, like how nerve cells (neurons) communicate with each other. Recent findings suggest that sleep plays a housekeeping role that removes toxins in your brain that build up while you are awake. Adequate sleep can prevent depression, aid in your social and emotional intelligence, and even help you to be more productive and concentrate. Want to know how? Here’s a link, go find out for yourself. Click here.

Exercise, this releases toxins from your body and bla bla bla you know the rest. Okay fine, for those of you who don’t know, “exercise is a natural and effective anti-anxiety treatment. It relieves tension and stress, boosts physical and mental energy, and enhances well-being through the release of endorphins. Anything that gets you moving can help, but you'll get a bigger benefit if you pay attention instead of zoning out.” Here’s the link... Click for link.

 Be kind

Being kind can elevate your mood and release endorphins (a group of hormones secreted within the brain and nervous system and having many physiological functions, produced and stored in the pituitary gland, the gland of wellness).  I know I feel good after helping my annoying sister with her homework or assisting an old lady by reading something she can’t. Any of the fruits of the spirit really, can help with your overall well-being once you practice them. The Fruits of the spirit can be found in the Holy Bible; Galatians 5:22-23. Essentially, they are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. All good things to practice for a sound mind and a better life.

 Love yourself

Still under the fruits of the spirit, this ‘fruit’ is actually the very first one and it’s no wonder why. Love is a very powerful thing. It was Jesus’ love for us that made him choose to die for our (undeserving) sake. This love is not to be kept to oneself but to be shared. Love is free and it’s for everyone. Even from you to yourself. I am not going to tell you why you ‘should’ love yourself, as you should have been told this plenty of times. But if for some silly reason you don’t, don’t allow yourself to deprive yourself of something so beautiful, the love of God. Discover the true you and try, just try and never stop trying to find a way to your own heart. It is so important that you do. Without love, life has no meaning. God is love. So, if you can’t find your love, find His.

 Pray and get closer to God/Spiritual Health

This one is the most obvious and yet the most neglected. You can’t do anything without God so why leave him out of anything, especially something as important as your health? This of course is another form of self-care that connects with your mental health. All aspects of your self-care are connected. This topic of course needs a blog of its own, so as briefly as possible, let me say this, The Lord is your health and your strength. Jesus Himself said in Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

 Surround yourself with positivity

Ya’ like Jazz? Then listen to some. Don’t hold yourself back from doing your favourite things just because you’re busy. Try to balance your work with your leisure. You could even try rewarding yourself after each task with something you like, as long as it doesn’t interfere with the rest of your tasks or any other form of your self-care.

Another way you can surround yourself with positivity is by literally surrounding yourself with positivity. Put positive affirming messages on your walls, as your wallpaper, on your mirror, even on your clothes. Remember, you are what you eat, and this goes for what you allow your mind to consume also.

Anyhoo, it’s late, I’m tired, so I hope you’re tired of reading now. Also, please share this to help someone else. Thank you❤

I’ll talk to you more next time hunees, but for now, that’s all I wrote. Byeee.

 WAIT! Here are some positive wallpapers for your personal computers (pc). Let me know if you want me to make some for your phones too 😉.

[prolifeproliberty]

I need advice for witnessing to an unbeliever, and I'm not sure who to ask at this point. I used to try to witness to people when I was 14 and always butchered it, and I'm a little traumatized by how it turned out. I'm super scared of pushing people away--to the point where I haven't even tried in years. My unbelieving friend is good-hearted and sweet, but vulnerable and depressed right now. I only know him online, and we only started chatting recently, but we're already close friends. (cont.)

(cont.) One question I'd like answered is, is it okay if I don't hide the fact that I'm shy about having this conversation (because of how these conversations have ended up in the past for me?) I've heard that you "absolutely have" to sound confident, but I want to be genuine, too. We're very genuine with each other and having this kind of talk is out of character for me, even as necessary as it is to have it. I know I can't be embarrassed about sharing my faith but it's difficult not to be. (c.(cont.) I'm not an inexperienced Christian and I am reading up about this, but any advice you can give would help, really. And if you think someone else would have a better answer, by all means redirect me. For the most part, if you can think of ways to start the conversation that wouldn't sound awkward, that would be lifesaving ;-; I just think God is pushing me to save this guy (who i'm also unfortunately starting to get a crush on, not that that's relevant) and I'm so so scared of messing up.(cont.) I didn't have room in my last ask, but thank you, by the way. This is really important to me if you couldn't tell. I'm tired of feeling like a fake Christian for being too scared to be a witness, since I fully understand how important it is ;; It's bothered me a lot for years now. So thank you in advance for helping me.

Thank you for reaching out!

First, know that you cannot save your friend. Only the Holy Spirit can create faith in someone. You can’t argue or debate your friend into believing. 

So before you do anything else, pray. Pray for the salvation of your friend, and pray for the help of the Holy Spirit in your conversations with him. 

Second, absolutely be genuine. Relationship is crucial in apologetics, as is your friend believing that you are being honest with him. If he thinks you’re putting on an act or trying to sell him something, he will shut down. 

Third, don’t expect conversion in a single conversation. Most people who convert to Christianity as adults only do so after years of exposure to the Christian faith and many people “planting seeds.” You might be only one of several people the Holy Spirit uses to save your friend. Don’t put it all on yourself, and don’t push for a dramatic conversion story. And, as I’ve said and will keep saying, all glory for someone’s conversion goes to God. 

There are many different thoughts and theories on the most “effective” ways to witness to someone. Ultimately, all you really need to do is speak the truth in love. 

However, there are some good tools to have on hand to help you do that. 

“But even if you should suffer for the sake of righteousness, you [g]are blessed. And do not fear their [h]intimidation, and do not be troubled, 15 but [i]sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a [j]defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and [k]reverence; 16 [l]and keep a good conscience so that in the thing in which you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ will be put to shame.“

(1 Peter 3:14-16)

Your first step is to know why you believe. Is it because Christianity makes you feel good? Is it because your parents raised you that way? Is it because you “just do”? If you’re thinking any of those, you need to take a step back to reexamine your faith before trying to make the case to your friend.

“12 Now if Christ is preached, that He has been raised from the dead, how do some among you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? 13 But if there is no resurrection of the dead, not even Christ has been raised; 14 and if Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is vain, your faith also is vain. 15 Moreover we are even found to be false witnesses of God, because we testified [f]against God that He raised [g]Christ, whom He did not raise, if in fact the dead are not raised. 16 For if the dead are not raised, not even Christ has been raised; 17 and if Christ has not been raised, your faith is worthless; you are still in your sins. 18 Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. 19 If we have hoped in Christ in this life only, we are of all men most to be pitied.”

(1 Corinthians 15:12-19)

The central fact of the Christian faith is that Jesus died and was raised from the dead. Without this fact, Christianity is meaningless. If someone could prove that Jesus was still dead and buried, I would walk away from the church right now. Seriously. Christ’s resurrection is the ONLY reason to be a Christian. 

“What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase?2 May it never be! How shall we who died to sin still live in it? 3 Or do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus have been baptized into His death? 4 Therefore we have been buried with Him through baptism into death, so that as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life. 5 For if we have become [a]united with Him in the likeness of His death, certainly we shall also be [b]in the likeness of His resurrection, 6 knowing this, that our old [c]self was crucified with Him, in order that our body of sin might be [d]done away with, so that we would no longer be slaves to sin; 7 for he who has died is [e]freed from sin.

8 Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him,9 knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, [f]is never to die again; death no longer is master over Him. 10 For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. 11 Even so consider yourselves to be dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus.”

(Romans 6:1-11)

If we are baptized into Christ but Jesus is still dead, then our faith is meaningless. But if we are baptized into Christ and He is alive, then we too will be raised from the dead and be united with Him in that resurrection. That is the central hope of the Christian faith for which St. Peter tells us to be ready to make a defense. 

If someone asks you why you are a Christian, the basic answer is: 

“Jesus lived a perfect life in my place, died to pay for my sin, and was raised from the dead after three days and ascended into heaven to secure my eternal life with Him in paradise after I die. Someday, Jesus will return and raise all the dead, and both living and dead will be judged. Having been baptized into Him, I am clothed with His perfection, and so I will not be judged on my own merit but on the merit He earned for me. That same clothing is available to all who have faith in Him.”

But how do we know that Jesus rose from the dead? The simple answer is that: 

The Resurrection of Jesus is a historical fact recorded by four different authors who either were eyewitnesses themselves or who recorded the testimony of eyewitnesses. 

These records were written, copied, and distributed within the lifetime of the eyewitnesses. 

We know this for multiple reasons, including that absolutely none of them mention the destruction of the Jewish Temple, a major geopolitical event prophesied by Jesus which occurred in 70 AD, about forty years after the Resurrection. If these records were written or even edited after 70 AD, the destruction of the Temple would have certainly been included as further proof that Jesus knew what was coming. 

Those same eyewitnesses traveled the known world sharing their story, and faced poverty, rejection, imprisonment, torture, and death for doing so. 

They received no earthly, material benefit for their testimony, and yet continued to insist on the truth of what they saw. 

These same records name other eyewitnesses and encourage the reader who lived at the time of writing to go and ask these eyewitnesses themselves. 

We know that we have accurate copies of these original records because our first copies date to within two centuries of the original writing. Compared to other historical documents written around that time or earlier, this is incredible. 

These records refer to historical events that can be independently verified by other secular sources, including those hostile to the faith. 

If Jesus died and then rose from the dead, we have much more reason to believe Him when He claims to be God, performs miracles, and promises resurrection for those who trust in Him. We also have reason to take Him seriously when He refers to Old Testament Scripture as the Word of God and quotes it in debates with the religious leaders of the time.

If we then believe both the Old and New Testament as the Word of an all-powerful, all-knowing, and ever-present God, we can see from those writings that God loves us, sent His only Son to die for us, and wants us to live eternally with Him in paradise. We also see that we do not deserve any of that, as we are all inherently sinful and corrupt. We cannot remove that corruption ourselves, any more than a dirty rag can clean itself. However, as I said above, Jesus’ perfection can and does cleanse us and make us able to stand before God with confidence in our salvation and in our Savior. 

There are several excellent books that I recommend to help you learn about defending your faith:

History, Law, and Christianity by John Warwick Montgomery (Makes the historical case I just made, and goes into more depth on how we can trust the four Gospels as historical documents)

Why Should Anyone Believe Anything at All? by James W. Sire(The first half describes what makes a good foundation for believing anything, and then the second half applies that to Christianity)

The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel(Lee Strobel is a former journalist and the former legal editor of the Chicago Tribune. As an atheist, he investigated Christianity intending to prove it false, and ended up doing the opposite. In this book he makes a case for the Resurrection based on the same kinds of evidence that a court would use to reach a verdict.)

I especially recommend the first two. I’m a little biased in favor of Montgomery, as my Christian Apologetics professor in college was his protégé. All three of these are excellent explanations of why Christians believe what we do and how to explain that to nonbelievers.

Also, if your friend or anyone else tries to attack your faith by attacking the Bible, saying it was assembled by people who arbitrarily decided which books to keep and which to throw out, or tries to use non-canonical books to dispute the Scriptures, check out this one:

The Canon of Scripture by F.F. Bruce

With all of this information in mind, remember that honesty and love are going to be your guiding principles in any apologetics discussion, led always of course by the Holy Spirit. Use the information I provided as it’s needed, and don’t try to bury your friend in information. 

Be sure to start by asking him what he thinks about Christianity and why he doesn’t believe that it’s true. Try to answer the particular issues he is facing first. Make sure you listen to what he has to say, and make him feel heard. Emphasize the grace and love of Christ for all human beings, including him. Make sure he knows he is welcome in Christianity.

If he brings up the problem of evil (a.k.a why God “allows” evil in the world), let me know and I can get into that (that’s another long post). Also, if he does express interest in the faith and needs help finding a church in his area that will preach Jesus’ death and resurrection as the central fact of Christianity, I’m happy to help with that as well. 

I hope this helps, and please let me know if you have any questions!