#the way in which jason HAS to run into tim and tim extend an olive branch for the rest of that scene with matt and smash to work and fall

[rigginsstreet]

jason spending so much of season 1 trying to run away from his past because he lost it with the accident, will never be that version of himself again and he's sick of all the constant reminders of what used to be and everything is just a painful memory now, between losing football and losing trust and the relationships he thought he had in tim and lyla and he tries to keep lyla close but it's never like it was before and theres this underlying resentment he cant get rid of and he's miserable.

he'll make new friends that fit better into this new life he's adjusting to and he'll throw himself into a new sport he can be good at but that old life took him 18 years to build. he expects this new life to take off overnight and he's disappointed when it doesnt.

and he's losing himself trying to sculpt himself into this new version

but then he gets back on the football field and coaches matt and everything clicks into place and he's having fun he feels like himself again it feels good being out there

and it all starts with a reconciliation with tim. because of course it does. it had to.

[thezestywalru]

Finally, the heart of ice shatters

Warning: angsty af

Damian Wayne was cold. He froze nearly everyone out, only letting a few people in the fortress that was his heart to see the cracks that had been there since he was younger. One of these people was Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

They were most definitely opposites in personality. Marinette was sweeter than confectioners sugar, while Damian barely showed the smallest hint of a smile.

They had met in Paris two years before, at age 15, when Marinette had fallen into him, consquently knocking them into the famed Andre’s cart. They’d blustered and blushed as belongings were sorted and blame was laid. He quickly paid the owner of the cart, briskly apologizing in immaculate French.

“Er, em, M-Marinette Dupain-Cheng.” The girl with the sweet blue eyes and doll-like face had extended her hand. Damian feigned ignorance at the time, and pretended he didn’t see the olive branch. Raising a carefully manicured eyebrow- he’d spent over an hour in the bathroom to get them just right- he had offered his arm to her, feeling the seam of the arm pressing into his skin.

“I do believe that you owe me a tour.... Miss Dupain Cheng, was it?” She had blushed again, biting the inside of her cheek and twisting her mouth. Damian checked his watch, noting the time and allotting two hours to spend walking around the city before he had to report back to the base.

Shocked, Damian had looked at the girl who took his arm, blushing madly. Was that all she did? She seemed to fluster easily. Appearing to gather her wits, Miss Dupain-Cheng has dragged him along-he pretended not to eventually enjoy her rambling monologues of what she has experienced at each landmark- and soon, the two hours were gone. Damian kissed her hand, taking malicious glee in the pretty flush that spread over her cheeks. They quickly exchanged contact information, with Marinette promising to be the first to reach out.

And so, the two friends kept in contact through the next two treacherous years. They both finally grew, Marinette peaking at 5’2” and Damian only 5 inches taller at 5’7”. They each made different and new friends, affecting each other in some large and some small ways.

Damian taught Marinette how to advocate for herself, as well as different martial arts that he had learned with the league. Marinette urged her friend to open up more to his siblings, helping Dick as Damian became more experienced with compassion and empathy.

Sure, they never revealed their identities to each other, but they were close nonetheless. Each would have trusted the other with their life.

Slowly but surely, Damian began to gain feelings for his friend. He wasn’t quite sure if Dick’s assumption about him having a crush on her was correct at first, but now he was certain. She was Marinette: bumbling, blushing, beautiful Marinette.

So, two days before her seventeenth birthday, Damian asked his father for permission to visit Paris. Bruce granted it, quite bewildered when all of his sons piled on- though Jason and Tim just wanted Damian out of the mansion, they really had no idea why he wanted to go. So Damian went, excitedly discussing with an oblivious Marinette her plans for her birthday.

Damian pulled up outside of her family’s bakery the day of, grinning larger than he had ever before. They’d videochatted before, but neither had visted Paris or Gotham since they’d met. He had brought a single red rose from a local market, putting up with the plump lady behind the counter pinching his cheek and calling him handsome. It didn’t matter, because he was finally going to tell her.

A crow gave a sorrowful cry above his head, but he ignored the warning. Picking off the thorns from the stem, he rolled the rose around in his fingers, finally gathering his courage- ‘shake it off. You’re a Wayne!’- and so, he entered the bakery. It was quite crowded, so he looked around for any clues as to how he could get upstairs. As he was peering around, a small woman who bore a startling resemblance to the girl who had won his heart tapped on his shoulder.

���Can I help you?”

“My apologizes, madame.” Damian apologized smoothly, nodding his head in a small bow. “I’m a friend of Marinette’s and I was hoping I could wish her a happy birthday.”

Marinette’s mother bit the inside of her cheek, just like her daughter had years before. Looking up the stairs, she twisted her mouth in indecision.

“How do you know her?” She asked finally, though she hesitated.

“I’m Damian. We’re.... pen pals.” She cocked her head.

“She’s never mentioned an American pen pal.” Damian should have taken that as a sign, but he was too excited. Sabine recognized the look in his eye and again, glanced up at the stairs. Turning back to the clearly enthusiastic young American, she gestured up the stairs and moved out of the way.

“Merci, Madame.” Damian quickly walked up the stairs, cradling the head of the rose like a flute of champagne. Finally, he reached the trapdoor that she had described so many times. Slowly, he pushed up against the door, hearing it creak as the old wood groaned at his touch.

“Papá!” He heard Marinette’s voice cry. “We’re busy!” He poked his head up with a grin that was as sharp as a knife.

“Happy b-“ Damian ceased moving, ceased loving, ceased living as he took in the scene before him. There was a boy next to her. No, not next to her. Almost on top. She had a hand in his blond hair, with swollen lips and wild eyes that seemed to accuse him of intruding in a private moment.

Clearly, the blond was Adrien Agreste, Marinette’s formerly unrequited love. Damian felt his heart shatter in his throat, his face turn white, and the pounding of blood filling his ears as he tuned everything out, so he threw the rose into her room and retreated. The trapdoor closed behind him.

“Who was that, Princess?” He heard the boy say.

“My friend Damian from America!” She sounded worried. Why? He wasn’t worth it.

“He can wait.” There was a small bit of giggling before they continued. Damian ran down the stairs, feeling the burn of tears pricking his eyes. Nodding sadly to her mother, he tore out of the shoppe.

As he walked back to his hotel, Damian tried not to blame himself. Of course she would choose Adrien. He was a model, able to commiserate about the hardships of the fashion world. Agreste was perfect for her- they would compliment each other well.

He was just a mess, a lowly demon, just like his brothers always said. How could he compare to Adrien Agreste, blond supermodel with a gorgeous Mediterranean tan and warmer green eyes than Damian could ever hope for.

Damian glanced behind him, not daring to hope that she was running behind him to accept his rose and his declaration of love. How could he have thought that a singular small rose would be more than what Adrien could give her? She deserved the world.

Entering the ‘Le Grand Paris’ elevator, he glumly picked his phone out of his pocket, looking for any messages he might have missed, but found an empty screen and message box.

He didn’t matter, he realised. He didn’t matter to the person who mattered to him. Inhaling deeply, Damian rebuilt his walls of eyes and snow, opening the contact of the person he quite possibly loved the most and deleting it.

When Damian left that elevator, he was broken once more. However, on the outside, he appeared indifferent except for a singular tear that glistened in his right eye.

———————————————————————

Marinette giggling to herself as she blushed, tracing a finger over the photo of her and Adrien in a heart. This had quite possibly been the best birthday ever.

Her class had organized a small celebration, during which Adrien had taken her aside and blessed her with her first real kiss. They had decided to come back to her room so he could give her his gift in person and they might have gotten a bit carried away.

On top of that, her American best friend, Damian, was in Paris as well! She decided then and there to call him to ask when they could meet. The rose landed on her keyboard as Tikki sat down on the lip of her laptop screen and glared at her holder.

“What?” Marinette dreamily giggled, thinking of three kids and a hamster.

“Do you know what that means?”

“What?”

“A red rose means love and passion.” Tikki’s voice was flat and toneless.

“Don’t be silly! He just wanted to wish me a happy birthday!” She sniffed the flowery aroma before she pushed it into the vase that contained the flowers that Adrien had given her only a few hours before. (The sunflowers classed horribly with the red rose)

Marinette eagerly selected Damian’s contact and pressed the dial image. It rang a few times before leaving her with the harsh and monotone voicemail.

“You’ve reached the cell phone of Damian Wayne. Please state your name and leave a brisk message at the tone.”

“Hey, Dami!” She called. “I’m so sorry! Adrien and I just got caught up with each other. My friends set up a birthday party for me and I was really excited because they’d been working on it for a while! It was a surprise party too.” She blushed at the thought.

“Anyway, I was wondering how long you’re in Paris and if you’d like to grab lunch tomorrow? Please let me know! Bye!”

Picking up the rose, Marinette waited for an hour for him to respond. No messages, no calls, nothing. Two hours passed and she began pulling the petals off the rose.

Three hours passed, so she began tearing the discarded petals to shreds. Why wasn’t he responding? Taking a needle from her kit, Marinette began to hack at the stem.

Four hours passed and she began to yawn, her eyes drooping. Marinette fell asleep in the desk chair, waiting for a call from a broken hearted boy that would never come.

Tags:

@ozmav @g-arya @maribat-archive @maribat-central @maribat @damianette-is-life @artxyra @frownyalfred @department-of-depression @justcourttee @izzybellepenguin @nobodyfamousposts

[hellsbellssinclub]

Can You See Me Now? Chapter 1

This is my newest Batman fic.

Summary:

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

After some nudging from Spoiler and Batgirl, Tim seeks out the Red Hood to ask the older teen for permission into his territory to follow up a lead. It was a small, innocent action but it was the starting point for both Tim and Jason to get to know each other.

But things are never as they seem and things always get better before they get worst.

Read it here on AO3

(Sorry to mobile users, the read more I put on the post does not seem to be working on the app)

“Look, I’m just saying that there is probably more to everything than what Batman told you. Maybe the now not dead Robin isn’t as bad as you think.” The young woman in the eggplant purple suit said for the seventh time in the last fifteen minutes.

“And I am telling you he broke into Titan Tower and beat me with my own bow staff, Spoiler.” Tim sighed, looking over at his Ex, feeling the dull burn of his broken ribs as he breathed in deep. “I know that Batman isn’t telling me everything about what happened. Neither is Nightwing or Agent A. I am in the dark as much as you. But really, I think there might just be a chance that he holds a teeny tiny little grudge against me.”

Steph shook her head at him. “I know he beat you and I know something went down with the Joker but!” She held up her hand to stop him from saying anything over her. “I have looked into every kill and action he has made. From start to finish. While he has been incredibly violent, and well, bloody and stuff, he has not killed an innocent person. Everyone he killed were violent drug dealers and pimps who were hurting the working girls. Crime has gone down in his territory in the last month.”

Tim gave her a pained look. He knew that Jason Todd as the Red Hood was technically doing a lot of good for Crime Alley, a place that has not had a stable crime lord or hand controlling it since Bruce was still a kid. And with Bruce’s own personal dislike of the area because of what happened to his parents and the GCPD’s unwillingness to investigate anything that happens there, Crime Alley often went unchecked and unnoticed by everyone. The Red Hood had strict rules he was willing to enforce and from what Tim had managed to overhear so far, the people who lived in Crime Alley felt a lot safer with the Red Hood around.

But that still does not change the fact that Jason was completely unstable and willing to murder nearly everyone who got in his way. The former Robin was willing to take that extra step to make his point. There had already been at least fifteen cases of torture reported to the GCPD that they know about.

(Though most of those cases were of convicted paedophiles and child molesters and honestly, Tim could not really fault the former Robin for what he did there; he too occasionally got the urge to do horrible things to predators as well, though he himself never acted on it.)

Red Hood’s official death toll was almost at sixty with the possibility of the GCPD finding more bodies every day. Crime Alley might be safer for the people who live there, but that safety was brought with blood and death caused by Jason’s hands. It was not the kind of safety that would last long. Not in Gotham anyway.

At least Jason’s vendetta against the Bat’s had died down though after whatever happened with the Joker that night nearly a month and a half ago. Bruce was not willing to share what had happened and the older man deleted the Cowl Cam footage before anyone else had a chance to see it. The Joker still lived, which was unfortunate in his own personal opinion. Yes, Tim fully believed in Bruce’s ‘save everyone you can’ view of the world but if he was to be honest, Tim would not grieve if the Joker was to be violently murdered by someone. Because really, that cockroach needed to die and just be stopped permanently.

“While I do agree that the whole, you know, serial killer-antihero thing is working in Crime Alley, it still doesn’t change the fact that he beat me up and tried to kill B and N. I really don’t think he wants me to come into his territory and act like we are friends or something.” Tim kicked a stone off the ledge they were standing on. Yes, he was still holding a grudge. But who could blame him really? He got beaten up by his predecessor while said predecessor wore an absolutely horrid copy of the original, green panties, Robin suit.

“I’m not saying go out and act like his friend, Robin!” Steph waved her hands again. “I am saying maybe you could extend the olive branch to him? Because from what you have told me, the guy was murdered in a pretty traumatic way, woke up in his own grave, dug his way out and then was more or less prisoner of those crazy assassin dudes who are obsessed with immortality? Maybe if you and the other Bat’s give him a chance to talk and stuff without the Joker and explosives involved you could actually get through to him. Everything that he has done to you guys, have you considered perhaps it was a cry for help?”

Tim sighed. “When you put it like that you make us sound like a bunch of dicks you know.” He shook his head and slumped his shoulders. She was right. But only to a point. Jason’s actions at the Tower and his anger at the Bats could be seen as a cry for help, especially given what they did know about the trauma that Jason went through. “But it still doesn’t take away the point that he attacked me and the others and while he hasn’t made another attempt against me, he has fought B and Nightwing recently.”

“He probably fought them because they were the ones who entered his territory.” Steph pointed out. That was also true, if Jason had come into his territory he probably would have attacked the older teen without a second thought. He could see the former Robin doing the same if Bruce and Dick tried to enter Crime Alley. “I get it Tim, I really do. He hurt you and that sucks ass. I am not saying that you have to forgive him or anything. I am just saying maybe extend the olive branch to him. You were saying before that one the leads in one of your cases, the one with the underground alien tech, was in Crime Alley, right? Let him know that you are following up on a lead and that you will not cause any trouble for him.”

He gave a low hum of thought at that. Tim’s original plan for that case was to go out in the day, skipping his afternoon study hall at school and going to look for the tech without his gear. It would have been risky but there would have been a better chance that he would not run into the Red Hood. There also would have been a greater chance that he would have been mugged because he looks like a rich white boy with money (which you know, he is), but Tim was confident he could have taken on anyone who attacked him.

But going and asking for permission? Tim had not even considered that an option at all. And honestly, why would he? Jason Todd had made it clear that he hated his ‘Replacement’ and that he wanted nothing to do with the Bats and Birds of Gotham. How would the older teen react? He wondered. Would he attack Tim? Or would he let him pass?

“Hey, if you don’t feel that you can be near him with without him attacking you then you should just bring Batgirl with you.” Steph grinned at him behind her Spoiler mask. Smiling always looked so strange behind her mask but one can definitely see the outline of it. Tim could not help but roll his eyes at her words though.

“I am not bringing Batgirl with me like some kind of bodyguard. I am a grown ass vigilante, I don’t need a bodyguard.” He wasn’t pouting. He wasn’t. He was nearly fifteen, he could take care of himself without Batgirl babysitting him.

“Oh, come on! Batgirl wouldn’t mind! Would you, Batgirl?” Steph looked over his shoulder, causing him to spin around and glare at Cassandra, who was standing a few feet away. He had not noticed at all that she was there and there was a small shock of panic and fear that went through him at that thought. He hates it when people manage to get the drop on him. Cass was the second best in the Bat family at sneaking up on people, right after Bruce.

“We need to put a bell on you before you give me a heart attack.” Tim groaned out, covering his face for a moment. At least Cass never went out of her way to purposely scare him, unlike Nightwing had when Tim was first starting out as Robin. His situational awareness has improved since he was twelve, thank god, and Nightwing was now not able to jump out of the celling and scare him anymore.

Cass gave him a small snort. “Am not Catwoman. Don’t need a bell.” The smirk looked as strange behind Batgirl’s mask as it did Spoiler’s. “I would be happy to bodyguard for you.”

Tim rolled his eyes behind his domino mask. Steph and Cass becoming friends was a horrible idea. He never should have encouraged it. They were both terrible together. Steph always had something to say or do and Cass was always happy to follow her new friend around, enjoying being a teenager like she should. Steph encouraged Cass to step outside her comfort zone and explore being a teen and Cass was willing to do most of the things that Steph suggested.

They were good for each other. But not good for his sanity, seeing as they roped him into following whatever crazy stunt they had planned.

“I don’t need a bodyguard.” He whined at them both. He didn’t need Cass to hold his hand. He could talk to Jason. And if he gets his ass kicked then he could just blame Steph for the idea and spend a week with the Titans licking his wounds.

Not literally. That would be gross. Why is that phrase even a thing?

“Am bodyguard now. No take backs.” Cass nodded, sounding pleased with herself and he groaned in annoyance. He doesn’t need Cass babying him. He is Robin! Terror of the Night and Batman’s partner. He hated being babied by Cass and Dick. They always pulled the ‘I am the older sibling and you are the baby of the family’ card on him. He can’t wait until he could be the big brother. One day he will give the Robin suit up and then he can be the one babying someone else. “Why is a bodyguard needed?” Cass asked, moving to stand next to Steph.

Before Tim had a chance to say anything, his purple menace of an Ex-Girlfriend spoke. “Tim is going to go and ask the Red Hood if he could go into Crime Alley. We need you to bodyguard him because we don’t know if the Red Hood is going to beat Tim up again or not.”

Tim shook his head. “Names, Spoiler. No names on the field.” He reminded her, closing his eyes in annoyance. Steph was bad when it came to remembering the ‘no names on the field’ rule now that she knows his name. If he didn’t know better he would say that she is doing it out of spite because he didn’t tell her it himself.

And Cass was either going to be all for being Tim’s bodyguard or she is going to be against it and honestly, he wasn’t sure which one he preferred.

On one hand, there are a lot of advantages to having Cass actually guard him while he spoke to Jason. Mostly all of them were that she could kick Jason’s ass. It wouldn’t matter how skilled Jason now is, Cass would win.

On the other hand, if she is against it she could go and tell Bruce which would end up with him benched and on the receiving end of a cold shoulder and disappointed glare for the next month or so. And he would probably have several new trackers placed on his person without his consent. Because B can occasionally forget to use his words and just say ‘I am worried about you, please be safe’ out loud.

Mind you, Bruce is still a lot better at emotions than Jack Drake. Tim’s father only really did emotions in small, but over whelming bursts. Which means Tim usually gets a weekend or two of father-son like interactions and then it is several weeks of ‘we exist in the same house but are mostly strangers to each other’. Which is always fun.

Cass said nothing for a few moments, her head tilting to the side slightly as she no doubt read Tim’s body language and seeing his hesitance and his inner monologue. “What’s in Crime Alley?” She asked finally.

“A lead to one of my cases. The alien tech one that I have been working solo on.” Tim explained. Cass had not yet said yes or no and he was still very much undecided on which way he wanted her to choose.

“Come on! Big bad Batgirl can definitely take on the Red Hood if he tries to hurt our Baby Bird!” Steph wrapped an arm around Cass’s shoulders. “And you guys can extend an olive branch to the guy by being nice and you know, asking to be let into his territory.”

Cass hummed, which once again was not a yes or a no. She gently shook off Steph’s arm and looked at both Tim and Steph. “Why extend the olive branch?” She asked. “He is a murderer. He kills people and makes Batman sad, here.” She pointed to her chest, right above her heart.

Whelp, that’s an understatement. Anything to do with Jason Todd hurt Bruce. When Tim was first starting out as Robin he could barely mention Jason’s name without Bruce completely shutting down. It had gotten better over the years. Sometimes Bruce would mention Jason in passing or would say something about how the young boy used to be. But now that it was known that the Red Hood is Jason Todd, things have gone back to the way they were at the start and Tim did not know what to do other than avoid mentioning Jason or the Red Hood all together.

“Spoiler believes that there is more to the story than what B has said and that there we should hear Hood out and let him tell his side of the story.” Tim explained with another sigh. He wondered how many times he was going to end up sighing in this conversation and thought to himself that perhaps he should stop doing so already because ow, his ribs do not like it when he sighs at all. “She also believes there is a chance that his behaviour and actions could have been a cry for help and that we should perhaps try and talk to him instead of you know, fighting at any given chance.”

“Yep! That is some good summary skills there, Ex-Boyfriend of mine.” Steph nodded and looked at Cass expectedly. The mask made it impossible to tell what Cass was thinking. Not that it was easy for him to read Cassandra without the mask but it was slightly easier without the frankly unsettling mask staring at you in the eyes.

There is a good reason as to why he would never go for a full-face mask when he finally is ready to let go of being Robin. And that reason is that is that he is more than likely going to see his mask in the reflection of a window or something and then forget that it is his mask and then scream in fear. Which you know, would ruin the whole serious vigilante look he would be hoping for.

Thus, he will probably only stick to a domino. Or a cowl. But a cowl is slightly too Batman like and Tim did not want to be Batman. He would have to think on this more in-depth later.

“Cry for help?” Cass tilted her head again. “You believe that the killing is his way of crying for help?” If anyone else had said that, Tim would believe that they were being dismissive or sarcastic. But Cass just sounded curious.

“Well, yeah.” Steph waved her hands carelessly as she began to explain. “I met him a few times back when he was Robin. He was a great guy. He was kind. Sure, he was a little bit rougher than Nightwing was when dealing with scumbags and stuff but he always stuck around to make sure that the victims were okay. All of his interactions with you Bats so far look like lashing out and cries for help if you ask me. I mean, he dressed up in a frankly fucked up Robin costume and beat up Tim. He was apparently angry that there wasn’t a statue of him in the Tower like there was for all the other dead heroes and whatever the hell happened with the Joker and Batman was well…” She trailed off.

Tim shrugged. “No one knows what the hell happened with those three.” And it wasn’t from lack of trying to find out either. Bruce was tight lipped about the whole thing and the Joker apparently only laughed when he was asked what happened. Tim suspected that Alfred knew what went down because the older man had been very stiff and cold towards Bruce for several weeks and has only just started to warm back up to him again.

“You think that we should reach out to him?” Cass asked. “Show him we can offer help?”

Steph nodded enthusiastically at Cass’s attempt to clarify what they were telling her.

“I do think that! And I think that Wonder Boy here is the best person to do it.” She gently punched Tim’s shoulder as she said this, making him rock back a little close to the edge. Steph may not be a meta but her punches, gentle or not, were stronger than she realised.

“Why can’t you do it? He hates me.” Tim pointed out. He really did not understand why she wanted him to do this. Yes, getting permission from the Red Hood could open up a professional relationship between them where they could actively avoid each other unless they needed to do something in the other’s territory. And yes, he could definitely see Steph’s point about how Jason’s actions did seem like a huge cry for help.

But Tim has already been beaten once by Jason and he honestly did not want to have another round with the older teen. The fight between them showed Tim just how much he was lacking in his training and he could not help but feel a deep, festering bitterness that he would never be as good as Jason was. As good as Dick was. It was a bitterness he was trying to push away and forget about but it never seemed to go away.

Tim didn’t want to offer the older teen help and then accidentally drive him away because he could not get a hold of his own mental health issues. Issues that he needed to actually address sometime soon, least he turn into Bruce. Or a supervillain. Either one would be bad for his health in the long run.

Steph punched his shoulder again, this time harder; causing him to wince because ow, why, that hurts. “Because Boy Blunder, you don’t have any history at all with him. Except for, you know, him beating you. And you are more than likely a trigger for him because you are now Robin. But still, you at least don’t have a history like Batman and Nightwing do. And he knows nothing about you as a person! He probably only knows what he has read about you from the assassins he was with!”

“All the more reason why you should talk to him and not me! You are a stranger to him, not me! Spoiler is new and not actually connected to Batman and Robin. And if you haven’t noticed I am Robin and something tells me he does not like that I am Robin.” Tim waved his hands in what he could best describe as ‘I am emphasizing my point and you are not listening to me’. He learnt this gesture from Steph when they first became friends and has used it a lot over the years.

“Look Tim; think about it like this. You are brutally tortured and murdered. You wake up in your own grave, dig your way out and are taken in by evil assassins. You spend who knows how long with said assassins and find out you have been replaced by a younger, better model who comes from the complete opposite background as you do. Your attempt to kill your murderer doesn’t work and your father figure is a dick. How do you feel?” Steph put her head in her hands and sighed before continuing.

“You need to be the one who talks to him because you are a Bat and someone who probably makes him feel like he was replaced by a better, richer model and that you are everything that he isn’t. If you talk to him, show him you are an actual person and not some cardboard cut-out of someone who he wasn’t, then maybe you could actually get him to talk about what happened to him and help him! Yes, I am a stranger to him and while we could get along and stuff he is going to need someone who is a Bat to speak to him at some point and…” She groaned. “I messed up my point. Tim, you are someone who is actually a part of all of this mess. I am not. Just, go and ask him for permission to enter his territory. If he says no then he says no. I will go and follow up that lead for you if that is the case. But please, try at least.”

Tim groaned again and looked over at Cass to see what she had to say about all of this.

“You,” Cass pointed at Steph. “You want Robin to talk to Red Hood. Because Red Hood is hurting. And needs help. Robin means a lot to Red Hood. It was his name, who he was before the Joker killed him. If Robin shows that he is not…” She waved her hand in a very vague but Steph like manner. “If Robin shows that he is not who Red Hood thought he was then the Red Hood will feel less like he is replaced or… unworthy? Red Hood was a good Robin. Now he is not good as the Red Hood. Bad things happened to the Red Hood, made him hard and angry. Extending olive branch might help.”

“Yes! Thank you!” Steph let out a low breath. “Why are you guys so good at summarising everything?”

“Nightwing.” Both Tim and Cass said together. Dick had a habit of not only rambling but also talking fast and without breaks. A habit of both his ADHD and from being best friends with a Speedster. Anyone who works or is with Dick for long periods of time learns how to summarise what he says.

It is a handy trick for Tim to know, seeing as he is also best friends with a Speedster and Steph has a habit of rambling herself at times.

“So…?” Steph trailed off and Tim, though he said to himself that he wasn’t going to do it because ow, sighed and completely ignored the pain in his chest.

“If Batgirl is willing to bodyguard than I will go and ask Red Hood for permission into his territory.” Tim felt slightly defeated.  He wanted to keep arguing that he really wasn’t sure that this was a good idea for either Jason or himself but at the same time he knows he would feel crap if he said no because Steph’s points were more than likely all true and-

And he did not want to be a person who ignores someone else who could be in need of help because he was selfish.

Tim has been lucky. Since becoming Robin he has had a wonderful support network that he has used a lot over the years and would never trade for anything in the world. Jason does not have that. Or at least Tim was pretty sure that Jason does not have that.

“I will bodyguard. Will only interfere if you are attacked. I will stay in the shadows and away from sight.” Cass said. “We do this tonight, on next patrol. It is late now. Time for bed soon.”

Cass was right, it was getting close to four am and Tim was due back into the Cave in less than half an hour. He was thankful that he did not have any classes until nine am because he wanted to have more than an hour sleep when he finally got back to his home.

“Oh wow. Today went quicker than expected.” Steph rocked back on her heels. “I am stuck in class tomorrow night but I expect to have at least three texts telling me how it all went from you both. Got it?”

Tim rolled his eyes but nodded. “Yes, yes. Three texts. If I get beat up you are so making me waffles.” He pulled her into a quick hug.

“Whatever, Ex-Boyfriend.” Steph pulled Cass into a hug of her own and then was grappling away with a careless wave.

“Do you think this is a good idea?” He asked Cassandra quietly now that they were alone on the ledge. Cass looked at him, the eyes on her mask stared directly into his own white out lenses.

“I think… that there is a possibility that the Red Hood is falling without a net. And that his lines may have been cut by accident. By Batman. By Robin.” She paused and looked up at the dark sky. “We can offer him a new line. And a net. Falling without a net or line… It is not good. That mindset. You feel like you are flying, until you hit the ground.”

Tim flinched at that imagery. Jason had been hurt by the Joker and whatever the hell happened with his resurrection and the League of Assassins. The trauma alone from that would be enough to make enough the sanest man go a little wonky. But whatever happened with B that night with the Joker…

Whatever happened might have taken away his line, like Cass said. But Tim was not overly convinced that this is a good idea. Cass must have read his hesitance because she spoke once more.

“He needs to see you as a person, like Spoiler said. Not just as a costume. He needs to see not Robin but you.” She gestured to his body. “When he attacked you, he was looking for reason as to why you were supposed to be better than him. He wanted to see, prove himself and you, that he was the better one. Because if he was not the better one, than him being replaced would have been a good thing.”

Tim frowned at that. He had not thought of it that way. While he could see the attack against him in the Tower as being a cry for help like Steph kept saying, he did not think to look as to the reasons why it was a cry for help. Steph and Cass both were good at getting him to take a step back and look at the full details of the bigger picture. He would certainly be lost (and probably more emotionally stunted) without them.

Tim knows that he should not use them as a crutch for explaining emotions and details that he may have missed about basic human reactions, but Tim was not ashamed to say that he did not connect with other people well and often missed simple emotional matters that should have been obvious to him. According to the internet, this was probably because he missed out on many key interactions with his parents due to them constantly traveling around the world and leaving him home with a nanny who discouraged most emotional reactions he had. Because his nanny believed that ‘boys don’t do emotions like girls and he should man up already’.

Tim really, really needed to get his mental health checked out sooner rather than later.

“Okay. Yeah, I see your point.” Tim conceded. “What about you? Are you going to try as well?”

Cass hummed and nodded after a moment. “Yes. Will try with Spoiler and Oracle. Give some space between us and you. Keep him from feeling trapped.”

He hummed in agreement and gestured to the edge that they were standing on. “I am heading back to the Cave. I take it you are going back to the Clock Tower?” He asked, feeling drained. This whole conversation and everything about it made him feel like he had fought off an energy sucking monster. He wanted to go back to the Cave, get into his own clothes and head back to his own home. Or maybe just crash at the Manor. He will see what kind of mood B was in when he got to the Cave.

“Back to Clock Tower.” Cass nodded again. “Will Comm you tonight. Find where you and Hood are. Go to bed.” She reached up and ruffled his hair fondly and then flung herself of the ledge with grace that only Nightwing could copy. He watched her grapple her way towards the Clock Tower until she was gone from his sights.

His bike was down in the alleyway below him and it would take him only a short time to get to the Cave from his location. Tomorrow, well tonight really, was going to be interesting to say the least. He would like to say that the growing pit inside his stomach was just anticipation and not the low level of fear at the thought of speaking to Jason face to face.

The Red Hood was volatile, dangerous and had a grudge against the Bats. Tim had no idea how this was going to go and it frightened him. Jason Todd could simply say yes or no. Or he could just shoot Tim in the head and Batgirl or no Batgirl there would be no stopping him if he does.

Normally, being in that kind of situation was sort of exciting. Like a free fall off the top of the Wayne Enterprises tower. It was a rush that left a bubbling feeling in his chest that just screamed ‘I am alive!’ but he did not feel that right now. He just felt a low level of fear bubbling away in his stomach, making him feel nauseous.

Jason made it clear that he did not like Tim. Did not want to be near him or see him. The beating he had taken was not the worst one he had suffered through. But it had hurt him. Hurt him badly because this was Jason Todd. Robin. The boy who Tim used to follow around with a camera around his neck hoping to see in action.

What do you say to a person that had once been one of your heroes after they beat the living shit out of you?

Tim did not want to think about it at all right now. He needed to get back to the Cave and back home before B and his dad start to worry. He would think about it before he goes onto patrol. Not now while his head was clouded. But later when he was rested and ready for the night.

[chronicbatfictioner]

Theater of the Soul - Chapter 10

It all sounded wrong. The red in the box. Yet it sounded right, too. He felt that he was moved, somewhere, out of his safety-- the blanket. His fort that is his safety. Somewhere else cramped and smelled like fruit and chemicals.

A hand was extended toward him, followed with dark blue eyes that felt... safe. Safer than none. He took the hand, but didn't lower his legs from the cushions until the little girl came in and spoke to him. The scenery outside changed rapidly, but the little girl chirped along with everybody else and assured him that he would be okay.

Everything else was a big blur until he found himself on a couch. A comfortable couch, unlike the ones he would find on the streets - obviously. But there were no stars in the sky - not that there ever was in the skies of Los Angeles. The air felt chilled, but stale-- bottled. And he mourned a little, for the freedom he must have lost again, this time; for his little bird, gone with whatever meager possession they must have taken away from him, again; for the boy and the little girl, still with him from the sounds of her voice nearby, just probably not for long.

He sighed, a little dejectedly as he watched the activity and people talking around him without understanding. It was odd, that his brain could not understand. He was good with languages. Once upon a time. Before hell rained down on him. Before the wrath of... whoever or whatever deity that hated him befell him. But it was all his fault, anyway.

What else is new?

It seemed that seeing Barbara's quite an emotional response, and Jason's likewise response to Barbara finally convinced Danny that they were all somewhat related.

"How do I know you're not a pedo, dude?" He demanded once they managed to get Jason in to Helena's car, along with some meager possessions that... well, that Helena deemed worthy to be put in her car; which do not 'smell or looked like it hasn't seen a detergent or soap in twenty years.'

Tim gave him a withering glare. "I'm fifteen. You're sixteen. I believe 'pedo' requires the monster to be an older person." he deadpanned.

"She's an older lady." he pointed out.

"And I can assure you, young man, that I have no interest in men whose age start with the number one, or are yet to be able to legally buy liquor." Helena retorted.

"She's actually a school teacher, you know." Tim said. "Maybe..."

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Drake." Helena warned.

"Not making any, just a suggestion." Tim shrugged, taking the front passenger seat and partially turned around to look at Jason. The latter was huddled in the backseat, hugging his knees and looked...

Tim blinked in confusion.

...scared. That's what Jason looked like.

On a whim, he extended his hand toward Jason. After staring at Tim's hand for a long moment, Jason tentatively took it and held on.

"You'll be okay," Tim told him. "Whatever happened, you'll be okay. I promise..."

"What did I say about promises you can't keep?" Helena scoffed.

"I don't care, Helena. He will be okay. Whatever and however." Tim said, solemnly promising himself that.

"Well... I'm going in to get my sis... Won't be five minutes. But if he freaked out..." Danny warned them as the car pulled over in front of the Hope Center.

"We'll holler." Helena assured him. As Danny slipped out of the car, Tim started to feel the tremble.

"Hey, hey... you're alright... Jason, you'll be okay, I promise..." Tim soothed him, rubbing his thumb to the back of Jason's hand - still lightly clutching his. "I know... I know you're scared. Whatever happened to you..." he continued, keeping his voice soothing and low. "it's not your fault, okay? I'm here to help. We're here to help you go home."

Tim kept talking softly, with Helena watching, until Danny came back with a 4-year old girl in tow. She glowered at Tim and Helena before her eyes landed on Jason and she bounded into the car. "Hi, Red!" she cooed.

Jason didn't reply. But he didn't object either when the little girl firmly took a seat on his lap. He had released Tim's hand to hold her with both arms.

"This is Ellie, my sis." Danny explained. "I told her we're going to a hotel with some really nice folks." he glared, as if expecting Helena or Tim to challenge him.

"Babs and Dinah would've gotten some food," Tim said. "...I hope." he added.

"Dinah has... handled homeless issues before." Helena replied, a little grim. "Just... food for thought here, Timothy, we're not in Gotham. Nobody here cares enough like Bruce Wayne to start something to help everybody."

Tim nodded. "I know." he acknowledged. "Just... I'm not stupid, okay? I'd love to help whenever I can. But I know where I'm standing."

"We don't really need your help, you know." Danny said, a little huffily. "I toldja my mom would be outta jail next week."

"And then you think she'll go back to prostitution, or can find a job on her own thereafter?" Tim asked softly. "It's just... Gotham, where I'm from, has this kind of problem, too. Back there, we have someone who's willing to help those who need it - like your mom or you. Here, honestly, I don't know if anybody will. And if what Helena said is right, nobody would. You'll need all the help you can get, Danny." he added.

Danny was quiet for a long moment, and then said, "I can get a job. I just haven't found any so far."

Tim nodded, but said nothing. "Yeah, we'll figure it out, man. Just... give us a week, alright?"

It was only once they got to the penthouse, and met Barbara's glare, that Tim started to wonder if his plans would backfire at some point.

"Bruce is flying here right after curtain down tonight," Barbara told him. "I've told him that Jason might need a physician, so he's bringing along Dr Leslie Thompkins. Whatever you have in mind for those two - and probably their mother, next, I hope you have or will think it through, Tim."

"Yeah, well. No I haven't. But I've checked with the Teachers' Registry and their mother is registered there. She was laid off from a private school due to downsizing - not because of any complaints. Babs..." Tim pressed his lips, "do you ever think of how hard of a decision it would be for a teacher to go down the road of solicitation to feed her children?"

Barbara's sigh was soft, but right there. "I am a woman, Tim." she reminded, and Tim could feel the flush rising up in his cheeks.

"Yeah, just... you know, even those of the same gender can sometimes be insensitive of their own's plight. ...Not saying you do, that is. Just..." he backtracked quickly.

"Timmy, baby, your compassion is stellar. But..."

"...if Bruce had thought of having 'saved' only one person, Dick wouldn't be there. Jason wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be here. And that's not putting names or numbers to the Narrows and Park Row kids at the community theater of each area." Tim snapped. "I don't understand people's obsession with numbers. Yeah, it might take me a shit load of cost to try and help one person. Yeah, I'm a kid, and maybe I don't have that kind of money. But at least I can present to those who can help - can set aside some of their resources to help. Like Bruce, maybe. Or Kate. Or anyone.

"Even if it doesn't work in the long run, Babs, at least I've tried. It's better than doing nothing, right? If everyone who 'wants' to help eventually do nothing, where do those who have less get their second chances? I know I'm not a god who can just will everyone to prosper or suffer less. I know I didn't waste my vote on the stupid idiot we have to refer to as 'the President' who'd made people suffer indirectly and directly. But at least I don't sit around and do nothing other than clucking my tongue and twiddle my thumbs!" Even as he wrapped up his speech, he quickly became aware of Helena and Dinah's glare from behind him. He screwed his eyes shut, feeling foolish.

He understood that his wishes were wishful thinking. Tim was smart enough to understand that it would take more than a few weeks at the Penthouse or a few jobs offered to make sure Danny, his sister, and mom wouldn't need to suffer and/or live on the streets. He just... didn't see why he shouldn't try.

"I've called my boyfriend, Ollie," Dinah suddenly said. "He told me that his friend, Michael Holt, has just opened a business here in LA that's looking for new employees. I'll see if he can save up a few slots." Dinah's boyfriend Ollie - Oliver Queen - was a businessman whose businesses tend to lean on the sustainable green businesses. Michael Holt, Tim knew from the plethora of articles of him in various magazines, has a technology-based company that has since blown up bigger than Apple and its contemporaries.

"They... and their mom - can stay over at our place while they look for another." Helena said. "No need for Wayne to keep this penthouse open while our place can handle them."

"We don't need charity!" Danny suddenly burst in .

"Danny..." Tim started, but Dinah cut him off.

"Oh no, buddy, this ain't charity. I'll bill you and your mom once she got out." Dinah told him. "You should consider this as being put on credit."

Danny seemed to contemplate the thought for one long moment, and Tim could feel Barbara tugging the back of his shirt, likely warning Tim to not interfere.

"Okay, fine. Just... just because you'll be taking Jason and..." Danny turned to look at Jason, all the way across the other side of the living room. "...maybe taking him home. I mean... he's pretty strong and all. But..." he gulped.

And Tim understood. Jason has been protecting the two kids for the past few months. In Danny's mind, Jason had probably done a better job than his mother.

"He has a home, too, Danny. And people who love him dearly." Barbara said softly. "He... had gotten hurt coming out here. It's our duty to get him back to health and take care of him. I'm... the Jason I know won't abandon you, and once he's back to health, I know he'll look for you again."

Danny's chin jutted defiantly, and Tim pretended not to see the swift dip or the tremble of his lower lip. "Yeah, I know. Besides, I figured if I keep in touch with y'all, I'll know where and how he is, eventually. Maybe you can help him find his beloved little Red bird."

Tim's vision suddenly tunneled onto Danny.

"--What??"

"Little Red Bird. He has this photo of a bird with red chest like, mid-flight. A polaroid photo. He had it for-- I dunno how long. Since I've met him, I think. I don't know where he'd found it or what it meant. I thought it was his pet or something." Danny explained. "He lost the photo a few days ago and... well... he's been like that since." he thumbed toward Jason. Still inert, not even responding to the little girl chatting and crooning. "Not like he was chatty from the start. But when he lost the pic, it's like he'd lost his will to live or something." he shrugged.

"Oh." Tim replied numbly. He caught Barbara's questioning glare. "I..." he gulped, torn between wanting to search through his archives in his laptop, and giving an explanation to Barbara. "It's... oh... I gotta show you." the former won, and he dashed to his bedroom, to his laptop. After what felt like forever (and after sending a print command to a printer), he finally found it.

He marched triumphantly with his laptop to Barbara, and pointed at the screen. "This," he said. "is a robin."

"Cheeky," Barbara smiled as the photo was printed out in A4-size letter - and a few others in smaller size because there is no photo paper available in the penthouse, and Tim wasn't planning on getting it - at least not now. "Robin, huh?"

"Yes, Puck." Tim said, smiling smugly. "He'd accompanied me on the shoots for this one. We were..." he gulped around the lump that suddenly appeared in his throat. "...I was making his portfolio. And then we saw the robins. This... mama robin was landing to feel her fledglings." he explained. "It was more of a lucky catch than anything... Jason loved it and asked for a copy in polaroid shape."

"Shit, boy, you took this photo?" Danny gave a low whistle.

"Language!" Helena hissed.

"Sorry, but,.. yeah, seriously. You printin' this out? He could be... I mean, maybe he'll be less sad..." he said.

"Yeah, I'm printing it out." Tim said, going to the printer and retrieved the bigger picture. "I'm not sure this will work, though... But..." he handed the picture to Danny.

"Oh no, buddy. If you're... if I'm right, then you should give him the photo." Danny said.

"Boys, I strongly advise we wait until Doc Leslie got here. If anything... if he lashed out or anything, the doc can sedate him." Dinah suggested. "That's... an amazing photo, Tim." she added, looking at the photo. "But yes, I think he has been in some sort of trauma-based catatonia, and thus the strong emotional ties to the photo. I would prefer to give him a little time..." she paused at Tim's glare. "Okay, I would like to observe him without uncommon stimuli for as long as possible, at least until Bruce gets here. Or at the oh-so-very-most until morning, since Bruce will get here by the crack of dawn and I expect most of us to be asleep." her tone of voice did not leave room for argument, and Tim shrank away a little. "Right now, I would like you - all of you - to wash up. Use the pool or something. Just wash up real good. And then we can get some lunch. Wait-- no, supper. It's almost 5 p.m."

"Can we get Thai?" Danny asked, almost innocently. Dinah glared at him. "I haven't had Thai in like, forever!"

Dinah huffed. "Fine. Just... all of you scrub up. Now!" she glared at Tim. "You too, Timothy. Or else I'm gonna throw you to the pool."

Tim almost laughed. Almost. Then his eyes landed on Jason, still huddled quietly at the corner of the couch in the living room with Ellie, Danny's sister, leaning on him comfortably.

"I'll get you home, Jason, I promise." he muttered under his breath, even if his mind is telling him that Jason's blank stare equals to a very tall, very sturdy brick wall around Jason's mind that might just be very, very hard to break through.

[the-anti-internet]

#trypod

Hey, haven't been around in awhile. I've been "busy" over at @petesmediadiary logging (once a week, usually Sundays) all the media I consume (plugtime over). But in honor of #trypod, a campaign to make people aware of podcasts, here comes a list of all of the podcasts that I listen to with a brief description of what the podcast is about: 12 Hour Day with J.D. and Connor -- Each episode is at least 12 hours long where the hosts hang out for a day. You follow them as they hang out, and do things around New York City. (Comes out a couple of times a year) Comedy Bang Bang -- Scott Aukerman hosts where each episode he has on a comedian and other odd people come in after a brief interview segment Mike and Tom Eat Snacks -- Each episode Michael Ian Black and Tom Cavanagh Pick a snack, Eat a snack, and Rate a snack. (Currently on extended hiatus, but worth listening to the back catalogue) The Indoor Kids -- Kumail Nanjiani and his wife Emily V Gordon talk about video games and other stuff they are watching. (Also currently on hiatus, but might be coming back soon?) Womp It Up! -- Jessica St. Clair and Lennon Parham spun off their characters Marissa Wompler and Charlotte Listler from Comedy Bang Bang where Marissa has a senior project podcast from her schools library where they interview the schools faculty and other students. (Hopefully it will be back after Playing House season 3) Spontaneanation with Paul F Tompkins -- PFT has a chat with a celebrity guest and then he and some improvisors do a 30 minute long improv based on that conversation. Harmontown -- Dan Harmon has a mental breakdown on stage, and raps about having sex with your momma. The K Ohle with Kurt Braunohler -- No longer active, but it was a multi-format podcast that Kurt hosted. Pet-o-philia and Get Lost were the two best formats. Beautiful Stories from Anonymous People -- Chris Gethard takes a call from a random person and is not allowed to hang up for an hour. At the hour mark the call is ended. Surprisingly heartfelt and wonderful. My love of Gethard aside, this is a GREAT podcast. Hollywood Handbook -- Sean Clements and Hayes Davenport are two of Hollywood's elite and drop names on this red carpet we call showbiz. This is some of the hardest I have ever laughed. It does take some getting used to though. You will hate it for the first few episodes. Emotional Hangs -- Kurt Braunohler and Joe Derosa explore their friendship and break down adult friendships and try to be open and vulnerable with each other. Rose Buddies -- Griffin McElroy and his wife Rachel recap episodes of The Bachelor family of TV shows. (I have never watched an episode of The Bachelor Family of shows) You Made It Weird w/ Pete Holmes -- Pete talks about Comedy, Sex, and God with pretty much anyone (usually comedians) who will talk to him about it. (Harris Wittels #3 is one of the best episodes of a podcast I have ever heard. It's an episode where Harris is open and honest about his struggles with addiction, and he is so effortlessly funny about it too. Spoilers: While the episode ends hopeful and on a way that makes everything seem like Harris is going to turn it around, he died from an overdose less than a month after the episode was released) Who Charted? -- Howard Kremer and Kyla's Vilaysack count down the charts in Music and Movies every week. Pistol Shrimps Radio -- Matt Gourley and Mark McConville don't know anything about basketball, but that doesn't stop them from doing the play by play of a women's recreational basketball league in LA. The Worst Idea of All Time -- Guy Montgomery and Tim Batt watch and review the same movie once a week for an entire year. Year one: Grown Ups 2. Year 2: Sex and the City 2. Year 3: We Are Your Friends (currently still going) Doughboys -- Mike Mitchell and Nick Wiger review a different chain restaurant every week. My Favorite Murder -- every episode Georgia Hardstark and Karen Kilgariff each talk about a murder and go through the story of it. The Dollop -- Dave Anthony tells an American history story to his friend Gareth Reynolds who has no idea what the topic is going to be. The Adventure Zone -- The McElroy brothers and daddy play dungeons and dragons together. It's some of the best storytelling you will ever hear and it's consistently incredibly funny. Never Not Funny -- Jimmy Pardo hosts a relaxed chat with a celebrity guest. Doug Loves Movies -- Doug Benson plays movie games with comedians and funny people. Totally Beverages (and Sometimes Hot Sauce) -- Andy Rosen and Intern Josh do blind shootouts of beverages trying to figure out which is which and guess their favorites. (I "produced" episode 100, so selfishly I would suggest that episode) CoolGames Inc. -- Griffin McElroy and Nick Robinson create a new video game every week. With Special Guest Lauren Lapkus -- Every week Lauren is the guest on a different host's made up podcast. How Did This Get Made? -- Paul Scheer, Jason Mantzoukas, and June Diane Raphael talk about a different (usually) bad movie. No Such Thing As A Fish -- Writers of British panel show QI talk about their four favourite facts of the week that they learned while researching for QI. Ding-Donger with Matt Braunger -- Matt Braunger hitchhikes into your life for 30 to 45 minutes each week as he tells you what's been going on with him. Thanks for picking him up! The Bugle -- Andy Zaltzman and a rotating group of co-hosts talk about what's been going on in the world over the past week. (Formerly co-hosted by John Oliver) Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction -- Comedians write erotic fan fiction about pop culture and read it in front of a live audience. Slumber Party with Alie and Georgia -- Alie Ward and Georgia Hardstark have a guest over and they play slumber party games. What Say You? -- Sal and Q from Impractical Jokers talk about whatever is on their minds. Cardboard! With Rich Sommer -- Rich Sommer (Harry Crane from Mad Men) talks about board games. Black List Table Reads -- Franklin Leonard produces "ear movies" each episode is a table read of an unproduced screenplay. Hound Tall with Moshe Kasher -- Moshe has an expert on a topic as well as three other comedians on stage to talk about the experts subject in a town hall style meeting. Post Pink -- Justin Linville and Robby (who's last name I've forgotten) talk about Weezer's releases since Pinkerton. U Talkin' U2 To Me? -- Scott Aukerman and Adam Scott talk about everything U2 related in the dumbest way possible. Tell Us How Your Dog Died -- David Kramer and David Stoll talk to a guest about how their dog died. Legitimately one of the best earwormiest theme songs ever. Even though there hasn't been an episode (and probably won't be any more) I still find myself singing the theme song to myself fairly often. 'Till Death Do Us Blart -- The McElroy brothers and the guys from The Worst Idea of All Time Review Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 every thanksgiving for the rest of eternity. In the event of one of their deaths they are to bequeath their spot to someone else who will take the mantle. FizzyBoys -- Don Finelli and Chris Gethard review a different soda every episode. The Ones Who Knock -- A podcast that recaps every episode of Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul Decoding Westworld -- From the people who brought you The Ones Who Knock talk about Westworld. Analyze Phish -- Harris Wittels (rip) tries to convince Scott Aukerman that Phish is a good band. Andy Daly Podcast Pilot Project -- Andy Daly's many characters from Comedy Bang Bang each try to get their own podcast at earwolf. Each episode is the first episode of what their podcast would be. New Years Eve with Neil Hamburger -- Listen to Neil count down the new year! In Your Dreams with Chris Gethard -- Chris and Dream Analysis Expert Gary Richardson analyze the dreams of people who called in with a different guest each episode. End of podcasts that I'm subscribed to. Now onto podcasts that I am either working through their back catalogs, or listen to depending on the episode: My Brother, My Brother, and Me -- An advice show for the modern era, the McElroy brothers give their listeners (and Yahoo answers users) advice. Started listening in June, currently on episode 114 out of 346. Hard Nation -- A spoof on Right Wing Political talk shows. Brothers Mark and Pete Hard host a show with a different political guest (a comedian pretending to be a political figure) Dr. Gameshow -- Jo Firestone hosts a radio call in show where listeners submit their ideas for game shows and Jo has comedians play the games in studio. No longer active and the back catalog is disappearing. So get on this one quick if you want to listen. Jordan, Jesse, Go! -- Jordan Morris and Jesse Thorn talk with a different guest. (Guest dependent) Hopefully We Don't Break Up -- Couple Will Miles and Giulia Rozzi talk with other real life couples (usually at least one comedian) about their relationships. High and Mighty -- Jon Gabrus talks with a guest about something that they are both passionate about. (Guest and/or topic dependent) If I Were You -- Jake and Amir give advice to their listeners. (Guest dependent, but the Ben Schwartz, Jon Gabrus, Thomas Middleditch, And Rose McIver episodes are all must listens) The Adventures of Danny and Mike -- Danny Tamberelli and Mike Maronna (better known as Pete and Pete) go on a monthly adventure together. I Was There Too -- Matt Gourley talks to an actor with a small-ish role on a big movie. Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend -- Alison Rosen talks to a person of note. (Guest dependent) This Feels Terrible -- Erin McGathy talks to people about relationships and why they make people feel terrible. Fitzdog Radio -- Greg Fitzsimmons interviews (usually) another comedian. (Guest dependent) 100 Words or Less -- Interviews with musicians. (Guest dependent) Going Off Track -- Interviews with musicians. (Guest dependent) The Best Show with Tom Scharpling -- Tom Scharpling's long running radio talk show. I don't have enough time in my week to listen to this every week, but whenever I can squeeze it n it's always worth it. The JV Club -- Janet Varney interviews People about what they were like in their formative years and then plays M.A.S.H. with them. (Guest dependent) Put Your Hands Together -- The audio recording of the weekly standup show hosted by Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher. The Todd Glass Show -- Todd Glass has a guest and it's just non-stop bits. There we go. There are all of the podcasts that I listen to regularly (or at least check in with regularly). There should be something in there for everyone. You're a champion for reading all the way through this, and if you try one of these and like it, please let me know. I would be happy to talk about any of them.