#there were rumours he disappeared for so long to focus on law and - they were true ^^; xD

[iristial]

ryutarookada_official: 【Report 】 I passed the 2024 bar exam.

RYUTARO'S FIRST INSTAGRAM UPDATE IN FOUR YEARS, WHO ELSE CHEERED

[annaraebananawriter]

Somewhere Only We Know

Yellow everyone! I am finally back after a while with another Oneshot. Sorry it took me a bit. School has been rough, as you can tell. This is one that I thought of quite randomly and worked on for a few weeks. It involves a couple characters i have not written for before, which is always exciting.

Also, before you start reading, two things to note: first, is that the some I’m using is Somewhere Only We Know by Keane, but I specifically imagined it with a cover of the song by Lilly Allen, which you can find here! 

And second, is that @maggicsorceress has a oneshot with the same song and even the same pairing, or at least the first one listed. Of course, it is far better than this one is, but that’s simply because I don’t have the poetic skills they do. Their oneshot is beautiful, and you can find it here. I really recommend you read it after this one.

Besides that, happy reading!

Fandom: Undertale, but specifically Aftertale, Errortale and Reapertale

Characters: Error, Geno (Who belong to CQ) and Reaper (Who belongs to Ren)

Pairings: AfterDeath and DestructiveDeath

Warnings: Language, I think that’s it. Let me know.

Word Count: 4218

~oOo~

I walked across an empty land

~oOo~

As the god of death, Reaper was often alone.

He could touch no mortal because they would die at his touch, making him or his brother reap them. This has been a fact of his life from a very young age, only a few centuries old. He wasn’t to talk to mortals, never come into contact with them. They were beneath him. They didn’t deserve to see such an important figure like himself. 

He still remembered the first time a mortal died by his touch. He had been hysterical. He didn’t know that it was normal for him, that it was going to be his curse to bear. At the time, he had thought he had done something wrong. Like any other kid who made a mistake, he panicked and didn’t tell his creator what he had done until he was cornered by the man himself.

“Reaper,” Creator had said, voice betraying nothing of what his mood was. It was always like that. Calm. To Reaper, unnerving. “I see you betrayed my orders.” It wasn’t a question, but a fact.

Reaper wanted to hide. To disappear and never face the consequences for what he did. But that was wrong. That would be digging himself a bigger hole, and therefore a bigger punishment. Creator was law. You always went by his word, for he knew all was always right, no matter what you did. So, Reaper pushed away his fear and straightened, looking his creator in the eye, no emotion present, just as he knew the older liked.

“I did.”

He didn’t say sorry either. Father didn’t like that.

In response, his creator did something Reaper never knew possible. His mouth curved into a smile. Reaper stared, eyes wide. He wondered if this was some weird punishment for his betrayal. If it was, it just took number one as his least favourite.

Creator sighed and gestured for the younger to follow him as he started walking. Reaper followed without a second thought. “I suppose I should have told you sooner,” Creator said, not looking at him. “so that you didn’t accidentally do something like this.”

Reaper blinked. His curiosity outweighed his distrust. “Tell me what?”

And so, his creator began the explanation of why death’s power was so extreme, why it should be fear by all.

It was this discussion that sprouted the seeds that would grow into the dislike he felt for his existence and job. He would feel disgust every time he reaped someone’s soul. The feeling of his powers shifting and expanding as he did his job made him shiver. But he managed it. It was fine, in the long run. At least it was him and not his brother, who got the better part of the job.

His brother got the gentle souls. The good ones.

Reaper got the bad ones. The sinful ones.

It was this way for millennia. Doing his job, acting as the obedient soldier his creator loved him to be. All while keeping his personal business a secret. He visited Life as much as he could, which he knew she appreciated.

It was…manageable, if quiet, boring.

Until he discovered the Save Screen in the AU of Aftertale.

~oOo~

I knew the pathway like the back of my hand

~oOo~

The blackness was intriguing to Reaper. He had never seen a place so desolate before. Even when he entered the realm of magic, there were colours and stars all over the place. But this place? There was nothing. At least, until he reached what he assumed was the middle.

A patch of glass highlighted with a light that had no source.

Two floating buttons: CONTINUE or RESET.

His curiosity increased. It was like nothing he had seen before. He had seen many snowy forests, heard echo flowers saying the same thing over and over, felt the heat of the CORE all too many times…but he had never seen this. The inner workings of the world. A place he had believed to never exist.

The Save Screen.

“Who the hell are you?!”

The voice startled him and he turned, looking down at the origin. A small skeleton monster, with white clothing and a torn red scarf. He was drawn to the monster’s eye. A patch of white boxes covered it, the other formed into a glare that the god thought looked…not threatening. Maybe cute, but not threatening.

Reaper blinked. He smiled.

He decided he liked this monster.

He was gonna keep him.

“Why,” Reaper started, lazily floating forward into the monster’s face to look him in the eye. “I’m a thief.” He winked. “And I’m here to steal your heart.”

The monster blinked, slowly.

Reaper stayed smirking.

Then the monster punched him.

~oOo~

I felt the earth beneath my feet

Sat by the river and it made me complete

~oOo~

Geno was adorable.

Whenever Reaper teased him, flirted with him, or talked dirty with him, a blush would rise up and consume his cheeks and he would tense up like a cat, usually telling the god to shut up. But the god didn’t care. He knew the other liked it. He saw the smiles and amusement dancing in his eye when he tried to hide it. It made him feel smug that, no matter how much he denied it, the mortal liked having the god around.

But that wasn’t the best part.

Geno didn’t die at his touch.

Neither knew why, but the mortal just…didn’t. Maybe the glitched around his eye worsened a tad bit, but that was the significant effect. Nothing else. It baffled Reaper and confused Geno. They just decided to accept the gift for what it was.

Reaper loved it. He exploited it as much as he could, relishing in the times when Geno got fed up and punched or slapped him and he didn’t dust away, leaving the god alone. He liked the feeling of picking the other up whenever he wanted to and the other would struggle before he saw the god’s grin and then settle down, grumbling as if he was truly angry.

(He wasn’t. He was just acting like the cat he was.)

The years of this relationship were the best of the god’s life. He found that he was the happiest he ever was. His face always held a grin. His brother had asked what made him so happy, on the rare days that he was now home. Not wanting to put Geno’s life in jeopardy, he lied and made up some random excuse. Not that his brother believed him. But he stopped asking.

When Reaper realized that he had fallen in love with the mortal, he had panicked. This went against one of the main laws in place: never speak to a mortal; never befriend one. Well, he had certainly done more than speak and befriend one. He didn’t know what to do.

So, he went to the person who gave him the best advice.

His brother.

After a lecture on lying, his brother had told him to simply confess. If it didn’t go well, it didn’t go well. It didn’t matter. The two of them would probably remain friends, with as close a bond that they had. The advice gave him confidence. Reaper decided to confess right away. There was no use delaying the inevitable.

But when he got to the Save Screen, it was empty.

~oOo~

Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?

I’m getting tired and I need someone to rely on

~oOo~

Reaper was devastated.

He searched through all of the AUs over and over again, but he found no trace of the one he loved. He refused to give up. Geno had to be here, somewhere. The mortal couldn’t just…up and leave, could he?

His brother had to find him and force him back home, as he had been neglecting his duties. He was put on watch by the king, to make sure he wouldn’t run off again.

He hated it.

He tried to focus on his job because he understood that he shouldn’t be turning a blind eye to his job, but he just couldn’t. No matter what he did, something would remind of Geno and he would get angry and sad again. The mortal never left his thoughts.

He wanted him back.

He was…lonely without him.

He didn’t like being lonely.

~oOo~

I came across a fallen tree

~oOo~

Error, the destroyer, was someone Reaper didn’t interact with.

He heard rumours about the other and had seen him work from a distance, but he had never gone up and talked to the other. He was still hung up on the disappearance of Geno, even though it had been years since the last time he saw him. But when he saw the destroyer, for some reason, the curiosity that had drawn him to Geno was drawing him to Error.

If he was honest, it frightened him. Also infuriated him. Geno was the only person who had made him so happy and he had left. And here was Error, someone he had never talked to, who so ruthlessly murdered countless innocents every day, who he felt the same initial attraction to. Was the destroyer trying to replace the mortal? How dare he!

But he wouldn’t know why until he talked with the other, no matter how much he didn’t want to. It would all be cleared up. He wanted it to be cleared up. He just…didn’t want to talk to him. That’s when he thought of something that would act as a compromise, that would let him see why Error was so special without him talking to the other.

He stalked the destroyer.

…

…what?

…

In hindsight, Reaper would think later, when he was dangling from some blue strings in the Anti-Void (a place that reminded him like the Save Screen, but made him feeling unease unlike the other did), stalking someone who destroyed AUs in a snap and heard voices probably wasn’t the best idea.

Since Error wasn’t around at the moment, he looked around the place, eyeing the dolls distrustfully.

“Okay, who the hell are you and why are you stalking me?!”

The glitchy voice made Reaper blink and look down. The destroyer stood there, tense. He was glaring at the god. Something about the way he did so seemed…familiar to him, in a painful way.

(“Who the hell are you?!”

“Why, I’m a thief. And I’m here to steal your heart.”)

The god shook the past away.

He glared right back at the destroyer.

Then he noticed it.

There in the destroyer’s eyes. A look that told the god he was trying to cover something up, something that looked like…pain? But why? It wasn’t like he knew Reaper…unless…a thought formed in his head, one that seemed impossible.

~oOo~

I felt the branches of it looking at me

~oOo~

“Are you going to answer me?” Error snapped, crossing his arms defensively.

Reaper tilted his head, looking the other over thoughtfully. He needed to test this thought, to have the proof in front of him before he believed it. “Can I see your soul?”

The destroyer blinked. It took him a minute to process it. Reaper could tell when he did because a blush appeared across him checks, the blue and yellow gradient perfect. “What!” The answer resembled a squeak.

“I said, can I see your soul?”

“No, I know what you said—”

“Then why did you say ‘what’?”

“Because it’s an inappropriate thing to ask!”

Reaper raised an eyebrow.

“Shut it!” Error said, bush increasing. “I’m not showing you my soul.”

Reaper sighed. So, it’s the hard way, is it? “I was afraid you’d say that.”

Error blinked, confused. “What—”

The destroyer yelped and scrambled back a few steps as Reaper summoned his scythe and ripped himself free of his strings. The god approached the destroyer calmly and the other prepared to fight. Before he could make a move, the god thrust his scythe under his chin, the blade resting just shy of his throat.

The destroyer froze.

By the magic of the scythe, his soul was summoned forth and Reaper stared at it, no emotion present. Well then…

The destroyer’s soul was just a sliver of a piece, like it had been ripped from its owner.

It looked just like Geno’s.

The thought made Reaper’s mask break. Why did Error have Geno’s soul? The only explanation would be that somehow his love had turned into the glitch before him, who looked like a wild animal that had been cornered. The god didn’t want to believe it…but the proof was too strong.

He looked up into the destroyer’s eyes.

The truth was written there, too. Underneath the angry front he put on, there was a panic and pain that Reaper longed to take away. He didn’t want to see his love feeling any of that. The worry he had been reserving for when he found Geno overflowed and made tears gather in his eyes.

He saw Error’s eyes widen and he knew the other had seen the tears.

The god of death retracted his scythe and reached forward. “Gen—”

In a blink, he was sent through a portal and into a random AU, away from Geno Error.

~oOo~

Is this the place we used to love?

Is this the place that I’ve been dreaming of?

~oOo~

Reaper tried to talk to the destroyer many times after that.

He never succeeded.

The pain of having someone he loved always running away from him was almost too much to bear. But he kept trying. He promised himself that he would make his way through to the other. Make him realize how much he loved him, no matter what name he went by or what he looked like.

He wasn’t going to let him go this time.

Never again.

~oOo~

Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?

I’m getting old and I need something to rely on.

~oOo~

Reaper watched as Error fought Ink.

He had a plan this time and just had to wait for the right moment to use it.

He winced at every hit that landed on the destroyer and felt pride every time his love had an attack hit the other. One particular hit made him twitch with worry, fighting the urge to interfere and hold Error in his arms, making sure he was okay and stayed okay.

But if he did that, he would probably be kicked out of a job, which would just be bad for everyone.

So, he waited.

Eventually, Ink retreated, leaving Error alone in the AU. The destroyer stayed for a minute to catch his breath and Reaper watched, preparing to go over and interrupt him once the time was right.

The destroyer stood and turned, raising a hand to open a portal.

Reaper’s hand twitched on his scythe and he shot forwards.

Now.

~oOo~

And if you have a minute why don’t we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?

~oOo~

Just before the destroyer left, Reaper grabbed his hand and pulled the other towards him and through his own portal.

Once they landed, Error pushed the other away, which Reaper allowed. He watched with a smile starting as his love gazed around to find out where they were. He watched as he froze at the sight of the dark void and two glowing buttons in the air.

CONTINUE or RESET.

~oOo~

This could be the end of everything

So why don’t we go

Somewhere only we know?

Somewhere only we know?

~oOo~

The Save Screen. Aftertale.

Their place, a place only they knew.

The destroyer tensed. “Why did you bring me here.” It wasn’t really a question with the way he said it so stiffly. So…scared.

“Well,” Reaper started, ignoring the hurt he felt from making the other scared. “I figured that if you won’t speak to me regularly, as normal people would, I had to kidnap you.” He tilted his head, smiling even if the other wasn’t looking. “I had to bring you to a place you can’t refuse.”

He could see the way the other struggled with himself. Should he drop the act or continue playing as if he didn’t know where he was? Reaper saw how the other really wanted to go with the second option, keeping this place in the past, forgotten. He didn’t want anything to do with this place anymore.

Reaper knew that. And he decided that, if Error chose that option, he would respect that. He would put Geno in the past and try to be friends with Error. If he was still refused, then he would leave the other alone. It didn’t matter how he felt on the topic.

Error wasn’t Geno anymore, not entirely, and he had to accept that.

But to his surprise, Error went with the first one.

~oOo~

Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?

~oOo~

“I never liked it here.” Error whispered, making Reaper freeze for a minute. “I still don’t.”

He blinked at the other, close to openly gaping at him. Then he shook himself and straightened, playing with his scythe in hopes to calm himself. “I’m sorry.” He really was, too. “This was the only way you would listen to me.”

That actually got a little laugh out of the other, who turned to face Reaper. “I suppose. But now that you caught me, can we leave this place?”

Their eyes met; one pair full of hope and the other full of pain.

Reaper tilted his head again. He echoed Error’s words. “I suppose.” He paused and reached up to rub his chin. “Well, that is if you promise not to run away from me. Again.” He gave a grin.

Error looked at him without amusement.

“What? It’s a perfectly reasonable request.”

“I make no promises.”

“Aw. Then I guess we’re staying here.”

“No, we’re not.”

“You’re not promising.”

“We’re still leaving.”

Reaper only laughed and Error turned and opened a portal.

They left for Outertale.

~oOo~

I’m getting old and I need someone to rely on

~oOo~

They continued bantering as they walked. It felt natural, like a piece of the puzzle clicked back into place and now everything went more smoothly. They stopped for a minute to rest, looking up at the stars.

Reaper looked over to Error.

The destroyer looked magical, sitting there and staring at the stars with a smile and eyes full of awe. He was glad that the pain so prominent in his eyes had gone away, for now. What was left was someone who deserved everything, able to sit with peace of mind that everything was alright. He deserved to be alright, to be loved. His glitches had even calmed significantly, only one or two remaining. Besides that, the mostly black bones glowed elegantly in the lighting.

He looked perfect.

Reaper smiled and an itch grew in the back of his throat. He longed to say the words he had been holding in for so long, but he wasn’t sure if it was time. They had only just reconciled. He didn’t want to ruin things before they started to get better.

But then Error turned to him with a questioning smile, looking even more beautiful that he couldn’t build up a block in time, so the words came blurting through:

“I love you.”

~oOo~

So tell me when you’re gonna let me in

~oOo~

They both froze.

Error blinked for a minute, the surprise openly shown on his face.

Reaper internally panicked. He was so screwed! Why did he do that? He had just found his love again after years of searching—years of haven given up—and now he just threw it all away. But he couldn’t just say he was kidding, too. That would just make him a jerk.

He had to calm down and explain himself. Make sure that Error understood that he wasn’t messing around, that he truly loved the other no matter what he looked like or how he acted. The fact was that he loved the destroyer.

That was it.

Reaper cleared his throat and continued. “I have for years. I was going to tell you, but then you disappeared. And now I’ve found you again. So…

“I love you, Error. And I mean that. It isn’t just something to make you feel better. It’s not some leftover feelings from Geno. I mean, I don’t even care that he’s gone! Well, I care, you know, because I loved him—like I love you! But my point is, that if you want to move on from being him, then I get that. I accept that, and I would say I moved on from him a long time ago. I just didn’t realize it because I didn’t know he had turned into you.”

Reaper inhaled shakily and swallowed. His vision had become a bit blurred from tears that had appeared with how nervous he was. Error was silent. The god of death concluded his confession in a whisper. “I love you, whatever that may be. Whether Geno or Error. I love you. Nothing in the world can change that.”

He stopped and held his breath.

Error was still silent.

“You’re an idiot.”

Reaper blinked, vision still blurred. “What?” He winced at the shakiness of his voice.

Error shook his head and laughed lightly, something soft hidden in it. “I said, you’re an idiot.” His expression changed, becoming something sad. “Why would you love me? I mean…I get loving Geno. He was normal and nice and…a monster with unfortunate circumstances. But me? I’m a monster. I’ve killed thousands of people, more than half of them innocent. I hear voices in my head and fight people on a regular basis.” He laughed again, this time in a self-deprecating kind of way. “How can you love someone like that?”

Reaper tilted his head. It seemed, to him, that Error believed he was unworthy of love just because of something he couldn’t control. By being the destroyer, he had to kill people. There’s no way around it. And just by looking at the pain in the other’s eyes, he could see that it wasn’t something he was actively choosing to do.

So, if he was doing something he didn’t want to do, why would that make him unworthy of love? In the god’s opinion, that just made him more loveable. It told him that he was a good person at the core. It was one trait that he still shared with Geno. They both were doing things they didn’t really want to do, just had or thought they had no choice in the matter.

However, just because Reaper saw it that way, did not mean Error did.

And that was something he had to change.

~oOo~

I’m getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

~oOo~

Reaper laughed, making Error jump. “And you think that one of the gods of death hasn’t killed people?” He smiled more coldly than he intended. “It’s part of my job. I reap souls. In order to do that, I need to make sure they’re dead. That’s where my curse comes into play.” He held up a hand. “Whenever I touch someone, they instantly die. Same goes with plants. Anything living, really. I touch them and they die.”

He looked over at the destroyer. “But not you. You never dusted when I touched you. I’m still not even sure why. But that doesn’t matter.” He put his hand down. “The point is, I’ve killed people as well. You’re not special.”

Error blinked twice. “But—”

“They were innocent? I know. But that’s not your fault. It’s part of your job. You destroy AU’s, doesn’t matter if they’re designed to be good or bad. Your job isn’t about that; it’s about making room. Without you, the AU’s would crash into each other and collapse, in turn killing the entire multiverse.” Reaper smiled. “In a way, you’re protecting the multiverse instead of destroying it. Aren’t you?”

Error looked at him. “I don’t understand how you can think that way.”

“Give it a few weeks. It’ll grow on you.”

He snorted. “I doubt that. Idiocy isn’t contagious.”

“After all that, I’m still an idiot?”

“Oh, definitely.”

~oOo~

And if you have a minute why don’t we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?

~oOo~

When they parted ways for the evening, Error stopped Reaper as he turned to leave.

Before the god could do anything, the destroyer leaned up and kissed his cheek. It was like time froze for a minute. Reaper almost didn’t believe what was happening was even real, but the warmth on his cheek was too pleasant to ignore. All he could do in turn was blink and gape when the other pulled back, a light blush on his face.

“I may not understand how you think now,” Error said, “but I think I might like to try to, if that’s alright?”

The god of impure deaths blinked and smiled, said smile full of love and affection for the destroyer in front of him. “I’d love that.”

~oOo~

‘Cause this could be the end of everything

So why don’t we go

Somewhere only we know?

Somewhere only we know?

[smolbeandrabbles]

My Last Name - Ralph Anderson x Reader (The Outsider)

@wltz-bby​ @happyskywhale​

GIF CREDIT: X

Author’s Note: I was supposed to get this off the ground before the Holiday period so I could write my winter wedding fic and like... completely forgot about it until it was a little too late.  So while you won’t get the Wedding this year, though I’m not promising inspiration won’t strike late, or... y’know if there’s demand, I thought I would still give you the proposal. Special shout out to a very good friend who keeps giving me SO much Ralph Anderson inspiration. I needed it and didn’t even know. Keep doing what you’re doing!  💕

We stan the pure form of ‘Daddy’ on this blog. 

My Last Name - Dierks Bentley 

Disclaimer: The Outsider (Book/HBO) Nothing to do with me / gif not mine / lyrics not mine / I’ve had this in my head so long and I’m not really sure this is the pay off but... here we are!

Premise: Ralph Anderson has a lot on his mind and that list is only going to get bigger. He’s not one for believing in confluence - it’s up to Yune to remind him sometimes things do just work out...  

Words: 4517

Warnings: ....Insulin warning? For a buncha reasons. I mean I know you guys know what’s coming but reader doesn’t! / Swearing

_____

I learned how to write it When I first started school Some bully didn't like it, He said it didn't sound too cool So I had to hit him And all I said when the blood came It's my last name Daddy always told me far back as I recall Son, you're part of somethin', You represent us all So keep it how you got it, as solid as it came It's my last name Passed down from generations Too far back to trace I can see all my relations When I look into my face May never make it famous But I'll never bring it shame It's my last name So darlin' if you're wonderin' Why I've got you here tonight I want to be your husband, I want you to be my wife I ain't got much to give you But what I've got means everything It's my last name Oh, it's my last name

---

Whenever Ralph used to be woken up in the middle of the night it was usually a call. The kind where he would groan and for all of 10 seconds - whilst glancing bleary-eyed at the clock flashing some ungodly hour of the morning - wish that he wasn’t a man of the law. It still happened occasionally these days, but a little less and less; people seemed more respectful of his situation now and wouldn’t call him unless absolutely necessary. Or unless the scene really needed both of you on it, and right away. Instead Ralph was woken by the tugging of sheets. You were still fast asleep, and he wasn’t surprised; the case you’d been working on meant putting in the late hours. He was at least glad you’d hauled Yune onto it with you, even though as your partner (in every capacity) Ralph felt a little guilty about it. You kept telling him not to be silly, he had bigger things to focus on right now. But he couldn’t help it, and he always thought ‘bigger than this case, though?’ As he sat up to figure out what was going on, Ralph came face to face with your adopted daughter Renée. “Oh, oh, Renée, sweetheart, what’s wrong are you okay? Honey?” Although also half asleep she was currently crying and whimpering and Ralph was immediately alert and concerned, “Oh, honey… honey it’s okay… what happened?” He wound his arms around her and hoisted her up into bed, and she kept crying, burying her face in his soft sleep shirt, “Daddy… don’t let the monsters get me, daddy…” “Shhh… Shhh… It’s okay, sweetheart it was a bad dream… I promise it’s just a dream.” It better have been, because if anything like that shapeshifter ever came for the people he loved again Ralph Anderson would give it more than just hell. But Ralph couldn’t help but be a little flustered. She had never, not in all the time you’d been together, nor in the joint decision for him to move into your house, called him ‘daddy’ before. Not even on accident. ‘Ralphie’ was as close as he got to a cute nickname - although he despised it from anyone that wasn’t her. He couldn’t help but be overcome with joy as he wrapped her in his arms, rubbing her back, nor that it spilled to his heart, now beating faster. Ralph had wanted to hear it from Renée for a long time, he certainly wouldn’t deny that. But he wouldn’t force it out of her until she was ready - he was just a little concerned that it had come to her after bad dreams… Ralph’s eyes flicked to you, luckily still fast asleep, he didn’t want to worry you with this if he didn’t have to. Kissing her forehead gently he was glad to see that she wasn’t crying anymore, but she was still holding him so tight and whimpering every so often. “It’s okay, Renée… they won’t get you I promise. I’m here…” That only caused her to hold him tighter, mumbling into his shirt, “Can I stay with you and mommy?” Ralph chuckled gently, another spike to his heartrate that he knew was ending with a stupid grin, he wiped it off to be appropriately concerned, “Of course you can… C’mere, we’ll protect you…” She snuggled in the sheets between you, and Ralph put his arm around both of you, feeling your body move under his touch and your subconscious hum of content. “Goodnight Renée…” He mumbled, hoping he’d be able to settle back to sleep easily. “Goodnight, Daddy…” She already sounded like she was drifting. Ralph smiled again before kicking himself. Don’t get ahead of yourself… she’ll forget by tomorrow morning...

***

He was standing in the kitchen with his what felt like his fourth cup of coffee when you returned from dropping her at school. “You best be careful with those today… what with your Captain’s interview!” You chided, pouring what was left into a cup of your own, before kissing his cheek. Ralph’s smile came off as more of a grimace, “I’ll need all the help I can get.” You shook your head at him, leaning against the counter, “Come on. Don’t be ridiculous, you’ll ace it.” He shook his head, “No.” You sighed, taking his hand and tugging him to you, forcing his eyes to look at yours, “Ralph Anderson, I’ll tell you good luck if that’s what you really want, but you don’t need it.” He laced his fingers with yours, “It’s only contention, Y/N. It’s not a dead cert.” You raised an eyebrow, kissing his knuckles, “Nope. You’ll get it.” Ralph’s eyes flicked back to the garden and he chewed the inside of his lip frowning, you tried searching his face for any clue as to what was on his mind besides the interview. But this detective had you stumped. “What’s wrong?” “Renée called me daddy last night.” You froze, and not only because that was so out of the blue, you knew what that meant to him. How many times you’d teased him about the moment it would finally happen. Now she’d done it, but it wasn’t the FIRST thing he’d said this morning?! “And you weren’t gonna tell me-!?! Ralph, that’s-! That’s so good!” Ralph squinted at nothing in particular, “Look, she… she was half asleep. I don’t think she’s gonna remember it.” “Does that matter? You do.” You pushed yourself up on your toes to turn his face back to yours and you smiled, “Babe… tell me how you felt. Right now, tell me how you felt.” “Like when you first told me you loved me.” You scoffed, but Ralph continued, “My heart kinda… went on overdrive. I know I was grinning like an idiot. Just… overjoyed. I guess, but Y/N she won-” You pulled him to your lips to stop him from getting negative, “Channel it. That feeling and that positivity. Into your interview.” “Y-Yeah okay.” Ralph sighed, knowing he wouldn’t get away with it, and then couldn’t help but smile, “I’m sorry I didn’t wake you. But it was bad dreams, I didn’t wanna worry you.” “Ah, I did wonder why she woke up in our bed.” You kissed him again, “I gotta go, daddy, but I’ll see you after your interview.” Ralph hesitated in your arms at your repeated phrase; “...I’ll need 20 drinks at this rate.” You laughed, but the fact that he was now blushing didn’t escape your notice, “Me too!” “How’s it all going-?” “Oh no.” You shook your head, “Interview first, case later. I got some more interviewing of my own to do!” You turned to him at the door with a smile, and blew him a kiss, “Later, Mr. Anderson.”  

***  

Flint City PD needed a new Captain. This rumour of retirement had been circulating a while with absolutely no weight to it. But earlier this month the Captain had announced that this time, those rumours were true and he would be retiring in a few months’ time - interviews starting imminently. Ralph hadn’t needed any encouragement to sign up, he knew he was getting to the age where he ought to be thinking of desk work as the main part of his job. Also, how often did the opportunity come up? You’d had one simple chat with him about it, that one where he tried to convince himself of all the reasons why he shouldn’t apply, and you told him to shut up and go for it. So Ralph had, and his interview was today. He knew he wasn’t the only one in the precinct to apply for it, and he knew that there were applications coming in from outside Flint City - heck he’d seen a bunch of ‘em walk in to be interviewed. (Always with you and Yune looking at them and throwing comments around that Ralph thought were supposed to help encourage him, but wasn’t always entirely sure) But from what he’d gathered, most of the FCPD wanted it to be him that got the position. Ralph was - obviously - humbled, but he wasn’t one for counting his chickens.

As his interview approached, he’d broached the conversation more seriously with you. Right now you were his detective partner. There wasn’t a lot of conflict of interest there, because you always worked cases together.   But if he was the Captain, and you were a detective under him, he could see why that would cause an issue. You’d moved to Flint City PD to further your own career, and Ralph didn’t want to put a halt on that just because he was the Captain of the department. And Ralph liked working cases with you - aside from you actually being his girlfriend - so there was that element that might disappear too. And he wasn’t sure he wanted that: “So, if I do get it - theoretically - I’ll have to promote you into a senior role. Otherwise you’re a ‘junior’ detective working cases that someone of my current role should be doing. Or I can just put you in my role… But then, do I pull someone else in? Y/N, I want to partner with you still. Would that be okay?” You raised your eyebrow and played into his ‘theoretical’ world: “You’re the Captain.” “Yeah, but conflict of interest.” You frowned, considering it, “Well, no-one has exactly said anything before now. But I see when you’d be in a position of authority over me why it’d cause trouble.” You shrugged, “See what the general consensus is; at work, with the people of Flint City. The DA’s office.” The legal side was very important. You couldn’t risk cases getting thrown out. “I don’t give a damn if the DA’s office cares-!” With that jokey tone - and the inference of your friendship with Samuels behind it - Ralph leant across and kissed you, “Good idea, Ms. S.S. Andersson.” You smiled, but shook your head at his nickname, he was always after that double-S. “I do have them, occasionally!”  

**  

Ralph knew that he wouldn’t get the peace and quiet he really required to prepare, when he rolled into the parking lot and Yune was standing outside the precinct doors, arms folded. ‘Just perfect.’ He took a deep breath, running his hands through his hair - really Ralph wasn’t sure why he was panicking so much about the interview; he knew enough that was fairly certain. Maybe he wanted it too much… maybe - with the consequences of your relationship - he didn’t want it enough. He chewed on his lip, sitting in silence for a minute. You were likely right about him being a dead cert, but Ralph was not about to bet on it until that paper arrived on his desk officially.

Yune came strolling over the second Ralph opened his car door; “How you feelin’?” “Honestly, pretty terrible. I’ve had more cups of coffee this morning than I can count. I haven’t had a real interview in years. I don’t even know what I’m expecting in there. Usually I’m the one asking questions.” “Well don’t act like a suspect and you’ll be fine!” Yune chuckled, but the quirk of Ralph’s eyebrow told him that wasn’t helpful, so Yune jogged his arm instead as they walked towards the precinct, “Man you got this in the bag!” “Look, can I just have the interview first-? Speaking of, I thought you were helping Y/N today?!” Yune shrugged, “I offered to get everyone coffee.” “So you could stand outside and wait for me?” Ralph pushed open the door, turning to his friend, “A little. But while she’s in there I can talk to you!” Ralph’s smile was a little crooked as he opened your office door, “About what?” Although he knew full well where this conversation was going. “C’mon man! About what!”  Ralph threw his jacket over the back of his chair and booted up his computer. His interview notes were still on top of his desk where he’d left them yesterday; you had little cue cards you’d been asking him questions from and he’d been able to answer with a confident smile on the drive home. Maybe he just had to pretend the Captain was you - Ralph had second thoughts on that helping. “Can I just get through today before you get onto me about any of that.” “Geez, what are you so worried about today for?!” Ralph bit his lips together and again blurted it, “Renée called me daddy last night and I- I just… I dunno what I do with that.” Yune’s eyes immediately widened, “Holy shit-” “Don’t get ahead of yourself. It was after a bad dream, she wasn’t properly awake-” Ralph waved his hands towards the floor to calm Yune down, but it didn’t work. “-This is all falling into place! Especially when you’re thinking of…!” Yune’s face lit up, “HA!” Ralph shook his head, “Geez, but it’s all a little too convenient right? Like it’s all just happening a little too… at the same time.” Yune let out a frustrated sigh, making sure the door behind him was closed, “For fuck sake Ralph, just propose to the girl already, you’re killing me here-!!” Ralph looked panicked for a second as he waved his hands once more and pressed his finger to his lips to shut Yune up, looking pretty stern, “Shush!” “She loves you, her kid loves you, you’re gonna get this Captain’s job. It’s all gonna work out. Sometimes things just work Ralph. I know you’re not a big believer… even when you know there’s other forces at work out there.” “...Things don’t just work… there’s gotta be reasons!” “Yeah, I just gave you three, they aren’t connected, they’re just happening at the same time. Stop looking for trouble where there isn’t any.” Yune crossed the room and shook his friend’s shoulders, “Cheer up! Ace this interview!” Then he chuckled, “Now I’m gonna go get coffee before Y/N kills me.” Ralph couldn’t help but chuckle back, “Yeah. I would, and I won’t be stopping her!” “Aw,” Yune feigned hurt as he walked back through the door, “now that’s unfair-! After all my support!?”

Ralph sat back at his desk, finding himself needing to take an even bigger deep breath and wishing Yune hadn’t brought up the proposal. It had been a tentative idea thrown out there the last time the two of them had after work drinks, and Yune had immediately leapt on it. He liked asking if Ralph had thought about what he was going to say, and where, and how, and if he’d got a ring yet. And although Ralph was serious, and he knew in the back of his head such a proposal was imminent, he didn’t know anything beyond the fact he was going to do it. He placed a hand to his forehead and groaned, turning back to his notes - this was priority one, everyone was right. Once Ralph knew what his future was going to hold, he could start thinking about what his future with you would look like - and exactly how he’d change that last name of yours.  

***  

Anderson and Andersson had been a running joke between nearly the whole damn city since you’d arrived here. Yune had refused to tell Ralph your name until the Captain had introduced you. And you’d had to on the spot explain to a surprised looking Ralph that ‘mine is spelt with a double-S’ - hence his sometime-nickname for you. With Yune standing by trying his very best to hold in his laughter with a poker face. How you had to introduce yourselves as “Detective Anderson & Andersson” and everyone got that look on their face. And how you started adding the quip of “Yes, we’re partners.” when you’d started dating. But people started to think that you were already married - and then began the process of explaining the spelling, to every person in Flint City who gave the same little amused smile.

When Ralph had started to joke with you about the possibility of getting married, he’d always said something along the lines of; ‘We need to get rid of that extra S - shouldn’t be too hard!’ You’d never really known - or particularly cared - if he was serious or not. You never seemed to be fishing for marriage, the only time you’d brought it up semi-seriously was when you’d had a tentative conversation of having kids of yours own, your comment being ‘At least change my last name first-!’ Your main concern really was his influence on Renée’s life - and you didn’t need to be married for that to continue the way it was going. She didn’t need to refer to Ralph as her father, but he was certainly a father figure for her. Although ever since that night he’d wanted her to say it again, accidentally, or maybe again in a half-asleep state; it hadn’t happened. And you’d watched Ralph try not to look disappointed, or try not to look like he was wishing for it so hard… You both knew it would take her time, but it looked like it was killing him.

He got the Captaincy easily enough, it was barely even an interview; basic competency questions before what felt much more like a chat. Although Ralph was very cautious of slip ups even then. Of course the Frankie Peterson case was brought up, and all Ralph really had to say was that lessons were learned, no-one was perfect, Terry was done right by in the end. We got the guy - though for obvious reasons he didn’t add that. Ralph was fully prepared to admit to mistakes, but thought the rest of his career would speak for itself. And it clearly did. Basically the whole precinct had been called together when it was announced and had a party for him. (Your little family and his closest friends had a more relaxed and intimate dinner together afterwards, where Ralph let himself go a little bit). Ralph was very humble about accepting it, and careful about his transition period. Especially when it came to you, everyone seemed alright with things as they stood - they had watched you both for several years as partners and how the relationship had played out there. It was all very ‘let’s see how it goes’ - and Ralph would take any complaints or comments about professionalism, favouritism or conflicts of interest very seriously. He had sent a general enquiry to the head of county police, but hadn’t heard anything back yet. Ralph just didn’t want to have to move you somewhere when you were so settled. You joked about going to the DA’s office, but that didn’t go down well - for obvious Bill Samuels related reasons, but also because Ralph thought that might make things even worse. You only ever rolled your eyes at him, “For the millionth time I’m not gonna run off with the guy-! He’s a very good friend.” “I thought he was your best friend.” “Ralph Anderson.” You smiled gently, brushing your lips to his, as if he didn’t know. “You have gotta be out of your mind.” Of course, once the position was in hand, there was barely a day that went by that Yune didn’t give him a look of significance. Ralph quite often had to kick him under the desk or strategically hit him with a folder. ‘Now isn’t the right time.’ ‘No, now is perfect! Don’t tell me you’re scared!?’ ‘I’m not scared-!’ ‘Good, cuz you faced off against a shapeshifting thing in a Texas cave, you can propose to your partner.’ Ralph’s laugh was choked, ‘How is this less scary than that-!?’

Ralph was a little scared of getting down on one knee. He had no plan. No game play. Heck he didn’t even think he knew your ring size - some detective he was! - and Ralph didn’t think he had the skill to enquire nonchalantly, or steal one from your jewellery box to get measured somewhere without you noticing.  And he wanted it to be a surprise for you - another reason why Ralph wanted Yune to keep his damn mouth shut. Either you were bound to overhear, or gossip would get it back to you. But it was his last name. Would you want to change yours? It might have been one letter, sure but… you’d still be taking his name. You’d often said of his last name that it was ‘lazy’ when he told you yours was spelled wrong: ‘Somewhere along the line someone got lazy and decided they couldn’t be doing with that second S.’ ‘Why can’t yours be spelled wrong!?’ ‘Most popular surname in Sweden, definitely not spelt wrong.’ Then you’d look up at him; ‘Or you’re Scottish. Anders-son. Son of Anders. Vs… I think yours is Andrew. With that missing S.’ He’d quirked his eyebrow ‘Something wrong with that-!?’ ‘No.’ Though you gave him a teasing little smirk as you’d mused on it for a minute, ‘I’m still going for that lazy angle!’ Not that Ralph thought that would factor any into your decision to marry him, but it was a conversation that kept flooding his brain as he got more and more anxious about asking you. 

Then, suddenly, the perfect idea came to him…

***  

You’d had another day visiting smaller ‘crime scenes’ and filing legal paperwork. Overjoyed when Bill kept congratulating you on being the only one who actually did half this stuff yourself. “One of a kind, Y/N, I tell ya!” “Anything for my favourite DA, of course.” “Which is why we gotta work against those idiots in the PD, right?” “Team work!” You grinned, “Although one is about to be the permanent Captain.” “Ah yeah, well, I’m still the DA. So, if he gives you trouble-!” Although Bill’s smile was warm - Ralph and he had their differences in the work place, but would certainly consider each other friends out of it. You laughed, “Oh, I’ll be right over!” Now you were back at the precinct and pretty buzzy with good energy. All your work was done for the day, and there was nothing too strenuous to pick up from the crimes either.

Your new Captain was standing outside, hands on his hips and smile on his face. You stopped in the grass and tilted your head at him. Ralph looked so happy, but also a little shy about it. You wondered what was up. But couldn’t help but think how lovely it was to see him looking like this. “Captain.” You grinned as he crossed to you, “You need me for something?” “Well I have been waiting for you.” “Oh, not long I hope?” “Well, I mean, I guess I’ve been waiting a while but… better now than never.” “What is?” Ralph reached into his jacket pocket and held out a little booklet for you. It looked like a detective badge, although you wore your own on your belt you always liked the ID booklet ones. Maybe you’d start using one more if this was a new one. You knew that your own promotion was imminent, in line with his own. “It’s about time you started spelling your last name right.” That smile on his face was gorgeous, and yet altogether quite indescribable and you couldn’t help but smile back.

A little confused at first, you took it from him delicately, opening it up. At first you noticed the title at the top. Quite correct: you’d been bumped up a rank; that didn’t surprise you, Ralph already had discussed with you that was something he would do if he got the Captain’s position. Then you scanned the rest of the document and paused. 

‘Y/N Anderson’. You stared at the name for a good few seconds, even though you knew exactly what this was. Your small smile ended up stretching across your cheeks and you could feel your blush rise as you looked back up at him again slowly. Ralph looked like he was trying to fight a smile until he had the answer, although how he could think he’d even need one was really beyond you. “Yes.” “Yes?” Somehow he looked surprised, even at the confidence in your voice. “YES!” You threw your arms around him, perfectly aware that you’d just shrieked it and you were about to start crying. “God, I love you SO much Ralph Anderson!” Ralph held you close with a laugh, “I mean I don’t have a ring; we’ll have to go shopping. but I-” “Are you kidding!?” You pulled back for a second looking back at your new badge, that wasn’t something you cared about right now, “What were you going for, most original proposal ever!?” “I mean I can get down on one knee and actually ask the question, if you want me to. Heck maybe I should I just--” You shook your head and wiped your eyes, “Just ask me. If you want to ask, you don’t need to. This is… perfect.” Ralph chuckled again, and took a deep breath, “Y/N, will you please let me take that damn ‘S’ out of your last name?” You couldn’t help but cackle, thinking that he might just ask you straight, “You may!” “So you’ll marry me?” He grinned, and instead of answering you pulled him into a kiss. Wrapping your arms around his neck as Ralph pulled your body closer to his. He would change her name too, that significance was not lost on you. If he was your husband, he would be Renée’s step-dad… and maybe he’d get called it regularly. Time would surely tell if Ralph Anderson would get his unspoken wish.

Your making-out in the parking lot had not gone unnoticed by Ralph’s best friend, and Yune’s whistle broke you apart. “Hey! Captain! Did she say yes!?” You both looked to each other and then to him. You were still holding that little booklet in your hand and you looked from Ralph to Yune and back. Ralph’s eyes remained on his friend, grinning although he didn’t answer, arms still around you. Of course Yune knew about this, of course he was in on it. You left your very-new fiancé and sprinted across the parking lot to hug the police lieutenant, very nearly screaming: “WE’RE GETTING MARRIED!”

Ralph shook his head watching you almost drag Yune to the ground with your hug, but laughed. Oh, he knew what he was getting himself into alright. He crossed the parking lot to help his friend before he got too smothered. Day 1 of the rest of his life, and that proposal hadn’t been so bad. You had just specifically agreed to take his last name, and Ralph’s heart swelled. If he was a crier, he’d let the happy tears he could feel prickling at his eyes fall.   He guessed the jokes would have to change now… Still, he’d trade those jokes for this.

Detective Anderson & Anderson didn’t sound so bad to him, after all.

---

Thank you for reading my precious babies! 💙💙

[savagekxds]

basics ~

name: sebastian vidar laviscount age: 23 birthday: september 13 pronouns: he/him sexuality: hetersexual blood status: halfblood species: human affiliation: order family: anita beltam (mother), uther laviscount (father), douglas laviscount (brother - deceased) faceclaim: toby regbo

wizard stuff ~

former school & house: hogwarts, hufflepuff, previously ilvermorney, wampus boggart: douglas' body patronus: swan current residence: oxford, london hometown: frederickstad, norway occupation: auror

biography ~

Sebastian Laviscount is the son of Uther Laviscount and Anita Beltam. Uther, the first son from a long pureblood line of American wizards, met and fell in love with the Anita while working as a part of the International Office of Magical Law, she was a muggle political journalist from Norway. His family had long since strayed from the blood purist ideologies of the past, though the pride that carried with the name remained. Uther and Anita married after a few years of dating, it had taken a while for Anita to get use to the idea of magic, she’d laughed him when he’d told her he was a wizard, thinking he was having a laugh. But eventually it became a normal part of her life. After they married they settled in Fredrikstad, Norway for a time. Both of their jobs often required travel but they managed to find a few years of semi-stability. It was during this time that Sebastian and his older brother, Douglas were born.

Douglas was born two years before Sebastian, and the boys spent the first of their formative years growing up in the rich magical community of Fredrikstad. With a large extended family of cousins, aunts and uncles on both sides of their family, they often found themselves visiting or being visited by family for birthdays or holidays. Both Sebastian and Douglas exhibited magical abilities from a young age, making toys float around them and generally causing strife for their muggle mother. Then, when Sebastian was six and Douglas was nine, their father got a placement in America for a few years and they found their whole lives uprooted and moved to New Orleans. Sebastian loved living in New Orleans, they had dozens of cousins in America, and he enjoyed being closer to them, even if they lived in different states. The family thrived in New Orleans, the two boys were happy, and Anita was enjoying the work it allowed her to do. Then, after three years of peace, the family got devastating news. One of their young cousins had been killed. The loss was felt all through the extended family, especially as more and more years passed without answers about his death. Living in America never quite felt the same after that.

Both brothers attended Ilvermorny, Douglas was sorted into Thunderbird, and Sebastian later found himself sorted into Wampus. Sebastian loved school, he was quick to make friends and join clubs, and he took to magic as easy as breathing. For a while it seemed that that’s how their lives would be, finishing up their schooling in America, likely going on to work in that country as well. But then their father got relocated again, during Sebastian’s sixth year. Douglas had already graduated by then, so it was only Sebastian and his parents that moved across the ocean, back to Europe. This time they settled in London, and Sebastian found himself thrust into the world of a new school and new community. He was placed in Hufflepuff, and made friends easy enough. However it was when he joined the quidditch team that he really found his footing at Hogwarts.

Joining this new school and new community also meant that Sebastian’s family were now thrust into the heart of the brewing war. A war that they had only really heard rumours of in Ilvermorny, Sebastian had found himself expected to choose between two sides that he didn’t really know all that much about. All he knew was that he wanted to keep his friends and family safe. During his time at school he met a girl with dark hair and fell deeply in love in a way he had never experienced before. It was wonderful, and they organised to meet up after they graduated, but she never showed. She simply...disappeared from his life. Heart broken, he turned to focus on his career and his part in the war effort. Eventually he joined the Order, and not long after he joined the Auror program, it seemed to be the best way to be actively protecting his family and the people he loved. 

But it wasn’t. Not long after Sebastian graduated his brother moved to England after getting a job in a small health clinic in London. The clinic also acted as a front for hiding muggleborns and their families and smuggling them away from danger. Somehow the Death Eaters found out, and Douglas and all the other workers in the clinic were found dead a few days after Sebastian completed his training. Losing his brother was devastating, and he’s since thrown himself into the war effort as a way to try and deal with the grief.

physical appearance ~

height: 6′0 hair colour: blonde eye colour: blue distinguishing features: his bright blue eyes and loud laugh, though he doesn't laugh quite so loudly since the death of his brother, and his eyes are tired now fashion style: very practical but not without being stylish. clothes he can move around easy in like loose jeans and cotton t-shirts.

traits ~

positive: confident, kind negative: impulsive, stubborn

♖ – — more info

[the-hidden-writer]

A Second Chance: Chapter 2

An Ace Attorney fanfic. Read on both AO3 and FF.net!

Summary: Miles learns the identity of his "dead" mother, and the aftermath of that revelation is a tricky one. Especially when his newfound little sister is trying to turn him into a spirit medium.

AKA Miles is a Fey. Miles also doesn't really know how to family properly.

[Chapter 1] | [Chapter 3]

Comments make my day! :D

The Sisters

Straightening himself and brushing non-existent dirt off his coat, Miles knocked on the door of Wright & Co. Law Offices. There was a buzzer, but Phoenix had requested him to knock instead. That way he wouldn’t freak out at an unexpected client.

It also meant he could take his time to answer the door.

Miles would never admit to being impatient… okay, he was. But this time he wouldn’t mind stalling. He kept his gaze on his shoes and tightened the grip on his briefcase.

He’d called in sick that day (per Gumshoe’s very adamant request) and had spent the morning thinking and composing himself. Also, he had been trying to work up the courage to come here. Once he’d made up his mind (and hadn’t changed it on the way to the car), he hadn’t bothered changing into something professional. So there he was in his white shirt, black overcoat, and brown trousers (he’d called them as such in front of Wright once, and the man had exclaimed “Jesus how much more British can you get?!”... he’d felt self-conscious about them after that). He felt like wearing his prosecutor’s suit may ruin the image of an older brother.

An older brother.

He couldn’t help but feel agitated, knowing he was the only one who knew the secret thus far. Well, apart from Gumshoe, but he hardly counted. He’d already spent too long thinking about Maya and Phoenix’s reaction that he didn’t want to waste any more of his heart going down that road again.

Finally, Phoenix answered the door. “Hi Edgeworth!” He said, with that charming smile he always seemed to wear.

“Good afternoon, Wright.”

He noticed that Phoenix look him over. He’d never come to their office in casual clothes before. He tried not to shuffle awkwardly, but thankfully Wright invited him in before he got the chance.

He had never been very good with people.

“What’s up?” Phoenix asked, once inside. He motioned for Miles to take off his coat, so he did and handed it to him.

Damn. This wasn’t the time to blush.

“Hey, are you okay? You look exhausted even for you.”

Wright looked genuinely concerned.

“I’m fine, thank you. I was working until rather late last night, that’s all. I’m not working today though.” Miles added after Phoenix raised his eyebrows.

What he couldn’t tell him was that he hadn’t slept a wink last night. He’d shooed Gumshoe away almost immediately after he’d calmed down, but it took a lot of convincing to get the detective to trust him to be alone. Every single second, right until morning, was spent thinking about his life, how it would have differed if he’d known the truth, and how he was supposed to announce the news that he was Misty Fey’s son.

“Wanna go get coffee or something? Or we could watch something, I’m not that busy.”

“Actually,” He said apologetically when Phoenix gestured towards the scruffy blue couch. “I’m here to talk to Miss Fey.”

If Wright tried to hide the disappointment on his face, he didn’t do a very good job.

“Oh… sure! She’s in the room over there.” He pointed to one of the few identical white doors. “I’ll come with you.”

“Um, actually,” Miles hated to break the man’s heart like this, but it was necessary. “Could we have some privacy? It’s rather important.”

Phoenix looked at the briefcase, and then back at Miles.

“That important, huh?”

A deflated Phoenix Wright was a scary thing.

“Sure. I’ll be here I guess… let me know if you guys need anything.”

Miles shot him a look of sympathy. “Thank you. But I’m warning you that it might take a while.”

Phoenix just nodded, that familiar smile returning, and then turned to continue… scrubbing the floorboards? Was he really that addicted to cleaning as the rumours said?

He took it as a sign to leave.

Gathering all of his courage, he entered the room.

Maya Fey was sitting at a small wooden table, engrossed in her work arranging… Limited Edition Steel Samurai Season 2 Silver Trading Cards?! He sincerely hoped his jealousy and awe didn’t show.

Alas, it did, and his eyes lit up. He had to refrain himself from asking about them.

Maybe this whole sibling thing wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“Hey Edgeworth! What are you doing here?”

Maya was always so positive and cheerful. Miles had an awful feeling that he was about to shatter all of that.

“Good afternoon Miss Fey.” He replied, and suddenly the finalized speech that he had spent all night learning (yes, there had been many drafts) disappeared from his mind.

He blanked. And panicked.

With a deep breath, he knew he would have to improvise. He was a prosecutor for goodness sake, he knew how to think on his feet!

“I, um, came to talk to you about something. It’s important.”

The difference with improvising in court is that he could feign confidence. For some reason, he couldn’t do that here.

Luckily for him, Maya took the hint.

“Oh… okay.” She said, her smile wavering ever so slightly. She motioned towards the chair opposite to her. “Here, you can sit down if you want.”

“Thank you.”

As he sat himself down, he carefully placed his briefcase onto the table. Maya watched his movements like a hawk.

“So, er,” He began cautiously, “we searched Misty Fey’s residence.”

“Yeah, I heard.” Was all Maya said, then suddenly she opened her mouth in confusion. “Detective Gumshoe already brought me a whole box full of stuff this morning!”

He couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at that. This may be the first time the detective acted so quickly. Well, the first time he ever succeeded in doing so.

Flashbacks of the horrid crunch of a car crash over the phone came to mind. He cleared his throat to try and rid himself of those particular memories. “That wasn’t the only box he found.”

“Really?” Maya’s eyes lit up. “What else is there?”

Miles sighed. It was now or never.

“Before I tell you, I would like to ask: what do you know about your father?”

This obviously took Maya by surprise.

“Oh… pretty much nothing, I guess. My Sis didn’t really remember him that well and said Mom never talked about him either.” She looked at him with a sudden determination. “Why? Is it to do with him? Do you know who he is?!”

“I-” He wasn’t sure how to answer. “He died. A long time ago. Not long after you were born, I’d imagine.”

As quickly as it arrived, Maya’s excitement died. Just perfect- he’d managed to crush the spirits of Phoenix Wright and Maya Fey in the span of 10 minutes.

Maya looked more miserable by the second. Time to move on.

He opened his leather briefcase. “Here, I’d like you to have a look at this picture.”

After warily taking out the picture of his- no, their parents, he handed it to her.

He hadn’t brought the entire box since he wasn’t ready to share that with the world, however, he’d brought certain items that would have served as evidence for his speech. But since the speech had been abandoned…

“That’s Mom!” She exclaimed, and he understood what she was experiencing. They’d lost their parents at a young age, albeit by different methods, and when Miles had first seen that picture he’d immediately focused on his own father. After having a very limited collection of photos to look at over the years, any new ones became a treasure.

Then Maya’s focus shifted onto the other person in the picture.

“Is that my Dad?” She asked quietly.

Miles nodded, preparing himself for that dreaded conversation. He may have forgotten his speech, but he’d faced worse in court. He could do this.

“Woah, he’s so handsome!”

What.

“Mom had good taste at least. I bet she was so sad to have to send him away!”

Maya’s enthusiasm had returned full swing, and she was practically clapping her hands with excitement.

“I, er-”

“They look so happy together!” She continued, oblivious to the heat in Miles’ cheeks. “Aw, this beats anything I could’ve imagined!”

Finally tearing her gaze away from the photograph, she looked up at Miles to see if he was sharing her joy. He wasn’t. He was confused, mostly.

Then Maya’s jaw dropped slightly. She looked down at the photo, then back at Miles. Photo, then him. Photo again, Miles again.

She laughed. “He looks a lot like you, y’know!”

Miles held his breath as the penny dropped.

Her head snapped down to study the picture again, and her grin began to wobble. “Wait is that…”

He stayed silent.

“H- That’s why he looked so familiar…” she whispered. “I remember that picture.”

Knowing exactly what picture she was talking about, Miles shuddered. It was the only photo she could have seen. The photo of his father's corpse, lying in that cursed elevator, blood streaming out of his gunshot wound. The photo that still haunted him to that day, despite knowing he wasn’t the cause of it.

Now it would haunt Maya too. He suddenly felt cruel.

She eventually looked back up at him. “My dad is Gregory Edgeworth?”

He nodded slowly.

“But that would mean-”

Miles brought up a finger to shush her. “Hold on a moment.” He said as he rummaged through his briefcase for the other photograph he’d brought, before handing it over to let her examine it.

It was a smaller photo that had been lying underneath the letter, so he hadn’t discovered it until later on the previous night. It was a picture of Misty Fey nursing a sleeping baby boy in her arms, with a young brown-haired girl peeking curiously over her shoulder. Though the baby seemed content enough, Misty had tears rolling down her cheeks. And yet she still had the small trademark Fey smile on her face.

Her expression was one that Maya wore now.

“Sis is way too young for that to be me. Is it…” She waited for Miles to finish her thought, but when he didn’t she continued. “...you?”

“I believe so, yes.” He said, voice breaking. Damn it, he was getting emotional now.

Maya leaned back in her chair and sat still for a few moments, mouth open and eyes wide. Her tears had stopped, but they had left their marks on her face. Miles felt anxious about her response but knew that it was his responsibility to tell her the truth. Especially as her-

“Oh my god, YOU’RE MY BROTHER!” Maya squealed, and he could hardly process how quickly she’d jumped out of her seat and ran around to squeeze him, and he flinched at the unexpected contact.

Almost straight away, she pulled back, as if realizing what she was doing. “You’re my… brother.” She repeated quieter, presumably as the implications sank in.

“I am.” He confirmed. She looked up at him.

“I just don’t believe it. All along! I wouldn’t’ve thought you were such a jerk if I’d known!”

Miles cocked his head. “Thank you..?”

Gently, he pushed her away from his side. “Now listen Miss Fey, I understand if you don’t want anything to change between us. We don’t even have to tell Wright. After finding out that you’ve lost your father, it may be better just to carry on as nor-”

“Are you kidding?!”

Miles blinked. “No?”

“Dude, you’re my brother! All this time I thought I was alone. My sister was murdered and then my Mom was murdered- I never even thought about my Dad really- and then I find out I still have a brother! This is awesome!”

Whatever reactions Miles had predicted in his mind, this was not one of them. Why was she being so supportive?

“Why are you so supportive of the idea? I tried to get you convicted for murder!” He exclaimed, genuinely shocked.

“‘Cause you’re my brother, duh!”

He wasn’t sure when the roles had swapped, but now he was the one who had eyes brimming with tears. It was contagious, and soon she began to sob again too.

When she hugged him again, he didn’t pull away. Instead, he held her tightly, if somewhat awkwardly, and genuinely didn’t want to let go.

This was his little sister. The universe definitely tried hard to take everything away from him, but it failed. Oh goodness, it failed. And at that moment, that one blissful moment of siblings embracing, he felt calm. Everything was going to be okay.

Maya jerked backwards suddenly. “I have to tell Sis!”

“Wait, what-”

“Hold on I’ll channel her, you need to tell her too!” She cried.

“No! There’s no need! She’s resting, leave her be!” She was dead, but that's the same thing, right?

But Maya wasn’t listening, she had already crossed her fingers and furrowed her brows in concentration. The Magatama thing around her neck started to glow.

Miles began to panic again. He’d only thought about Maya, and not even considered Mia Fey at all. Cursed spirit channeling!

He turned to look at the door and wondered if Phoenix was listening in. Probably not, since he’d been very interested in his own chores, but he couldn’t help but wonder nonetheless.

He’d planned a different speech entirely to tell Phoenix.

“Edgeworth?”

That wasn’t Maya’s voice.

He turned again to see a familiar face in Maya’s clothing, looking at him in confusion. He frowned- the last thing he wanted to do was to go through that entire conversation again.

“Hello, Miss Fey.” He said, shaking slightly. Though he’d seen this practice in court before, he doubted he would ever get used to the concept of spirit channeling.

“What’s going on? Maya didn’t leave a note, so I’m a little confused.”

She looked more than a little confused, but Miles wasn’t going to point that out.

“After searching your mother’s house, we found out that your father is my father, and I’m your mother’s son. I’m your brother.”

Wow, ripping the bandaid off in one go really does make it easier.

Mia appeared sceptical. “What?”

“See for yourself.” Miles replied, gesturing towards the pair of photographs on the table.

Mia pulled them towards her and studied them, her face scrunching up slightly as she did so.

She gasped. “You’re… you’re our brother?”

Her reaction was definitely less emotional and dramatic than Maya’s, but Miles could still sense the shock coming from her.

“I am.” He nodded, feeling a sense of deja vu.

“Oh… Oh god, I shouldn’t’ve said all those shitty things about you after our first trial!”

Like sister, like sister, even at his own expense. Wait…

“OH!” He shouted suddenly as he brought up a hand to cover his mouth. He looked away in shame. “The horrid things I called you… even in court…”

Mia raised a hand. “An eye for an eye. Never mention it again?”

He copied her action. “Agreed.”

And then they both laughed. And, for the first time in a while, Miles felt safe. It all felt unreal. This wasn't him, this couldn't be happening. It was probably a dream, so he'd enjoy it while he still could.

“I can’t believe it…” Mia said after they’d settled. “I knew our Dad was a defense attorney, and I’d even researched Gregory Edgeworth once I became one. God, it all makes sense! That’s why Mom agreed to help, and why it was such a big deal to her.” She held her head in her hands, and her stolen black hair fell in front of her face. “I’m so stupid,” she muttered, “I should’ve put two and two together!”

“In your defence,” Miles responded, “I didn’t either. And it is rather obvious now.”

“My Dad was a Brit.”

Miles chuckled again. “He was.”

Without warning, Mia’s embarrassed expression turned into one of sympathy.

“I’m so sorry Miles.”

Now it was his turn to be confused. “Why?”

“We all lost our father at a young age, but Maya and I never found out, and we didn’t really mind since we still had our Mom. But you had no-one…”

Miles was about to argue that he had Von Karma, but decided against it. It wasn’t the time to bring him up. It was probably never going to be, either.

“There’s nothing we could have done.” He said sadly.

Mia scoffed. “Yeah but…” she cut herself off with a smirk. “You’ve got a little sister to take care of now.”

“I already have a little sister-” He argued instinctively, then cringed. He shouldn’t have said that to his dead biological older sister.

Still, Mia seemed to show understanding. “Franziska Von Karma, right? She’s still your sister, just as much as Maya is. Maybe even more than her. But I'm warning you, Maya is a hell of a lot clingier.” She paused. “How did she take it?”

Of course, Mia wouldn’t know since she was busy being dead. “Not how I’d expected, but good. I think she’s happy.”

Mia smiled. “Good.”

They sat in silence for a few minutes, in which Miles wished he could have properly met Mia Fey while she was alive, but it was eventually broken by Mia herself.

“You should tell Diego.”

The happiness and warmth that Miles had felt began to dissolve.

“Wh-What?”

“Diego Armando. He told me he worked under Gregory Edgeworth briefly, and he never had a bad word to say about him. I think he deserves to know.”

Diego Armando was a defense attorney that he had faced off against in court a few times but never had the chance to meet properly in person. Even Miles struggled against him, though he would never admit it. The man was poisoned by Miss Dahlia Hawthorne and was in a coma for 5 years. When he woke up, he disguised his identity under the name “Godot”, and was recently convicted for…

A shaky hand was brought to his mouth, and he felt sick to the stomach.

“H-He murdered our mother…”

It was the first time that fact had really sunk in, and Miles hated it.

All of a sudden his shoulders were being gripped tightly. He was forced to look into Mia’s eyes.

“Yes, he did kill our mother.” She stated, matter-of-factly. “But he also saved our sister, whether that was his intention or not. He also mourned me, Miles. He may be a criminal, but he is nothing like Manfred Von Karma. Don’t you dare compare him to him. Deep down, he's a good man.”

“I-I won’t.” Miles replied and for the first time in his life, he genuinely felt like a little brother.

Releasing his shoulders with a satisfied look, she stood up and made her way to where Maya had originally been sitting.

“I’ll let Maya come back now. I’m sure you both have a lot of catching up to do, and I presume Phoenix doesn’t know yet either. You’ll tell Diego, won’t you?”

“You have my word.” Is what he said, but he still felt very hesitant.

“Good.” She said firmly. “I hope to speak to you again soon, Miles.”

Averting his eyes as her figure began to morph into Maya’s, he glanced at the door again. Mia was right, he was yet to tell Phoenix. How would he react, finding out that two of his friends were related? Would he break ties with him? Go into denial?

“Edgeworth!”

It was his turn to smile. This had all gone far better than expected. “Miss Fey.”

Maya (she was back to Maya now) frowned, and Miles immediately took back that last statement. “Dude, we’re siblings now, if you call me Miss Fey again I will end you.”

Once he was certain she was joking, he let himself laugh a little. Perhaps his little sisters weren’t that different after all.

“Alright, Maya.”

It felt strange on his tongue, but he could get used to it. Hopefully.

“Right, what are you up to?”

Both siblings’ heads snapped towards the door, where Phoenix stood with his arms crossed playfully. The pout looked quite authentic though…

He realized that the scene he'd walked into must look very odd, with one friend laughing hysterically and the other letting out a rare chuckle, both with tear tracks on their cheeks.

Now he had another hurdle to cross. Luckily he’d remembered his speech for Phoenix. He would have to be gentle in his delivery and be certain he had the correct order of facts. Reaching out to pick up the photos, he stood up and took a deep breath. It was time.

“We-”

“Guess what Nick?!" Maya yelled, startling him. "Edgeworth’s my brother!”

Oh.

Oh no.

[honestsycrets]

Unwelcome Eyes

❛ pairing | alpha!bjorn x omega!reader x elder!Rollo

❛ type | oneshot

❛ summary | Hey, could you write something where the reader is married to Bjorn and enjoy him on his raid for the Mediterranean and Rollo can’t take his eyes and mind off of her… Maybe Bjorn getting jealous and fucking the shit out of her or fighting his uncle, please? + ABO Universe 

❛ warnings | smut, alpha male snaps, explosions, nsfw, threats

Being an omega meant a certain… few things.

It meant that being married to an alpha would be a naturally aggressive relationship. Not only for the simple fact that omegas and alphas were both prone to their own aggression in different manners– but your husband?

Bjorn Ironside. Whose temper was unyielding.

“So that is Rollo the traitor?” You ask, holding your cup of ale about your chest. Across the way was a man of a likewise tall physique. His long brown hair framed his pale face, casting a shadow upon his brilliant eyes.

He thought he snuffed out other alphas looking at you… Even when that other alpha was his very own so-called flesh and blood. Bjorn wasn’t sure why he was surprised that his uncle stood back against his throne waiting for you to finish eating. You take the last chunk of shredded chicken between your greasy fingertips, wiping it away on the dull brown dress you wore.

“He’s always been a traitor.” Bjorn rumbles, bringing his shoulder up to wipe the ale off of his beard. “There is a reason he summoned you out of the dungeon with me.”

“Let us see if he is as bad as is rumoured.” You reply.

It did little to frame your figure and for that, Rollo did not like it. You stand up to your uncle-in-law, looking at his sword on his belt in admiration for its craftsmanship. Your father was a blacksmith, lain now deep in the cold and unforgiving earth. The love for his passions remained in his absence.

“That dress.” His uncle says. “It does nothing for your figure.”

They had the same taste. As if that was a stretch. Their sexual reputation preceded them. Still, his uncle was not forgiven. Not for his betrayal in Paris and certainly not now, drooling over his beautiful wife. His hard stare turns to his uncle, holding him responsible for the eyes that would have been better popped out and on a dish.

This was what his uncle did. He betrayed him… and worse yet, you seem to be fond of the attention from the man who shamed his family in lavish Frankish robes.

“Oh, you think I have a figure under this?” You laugh. “I could be a bit of plank.”

“You wouldn’t have a Ragnarsson if you were a plank,” Rollo says fondly. The words seem to hurt his tongue as he says them, and still, you flutter your lashes at him. “And I know what a well-endowed woman looks like. I spent enough years chasing them.”

You look down to your toes, lifting your skirt just a bit over your ankle. Heavy breath forces its way out-- but it's not yours. It’s not Rollo’s either. Bjorn huffs out short breaths as he sits motionless, turning his head so that he might watch his uncle interact with you.

“What would you suggest?”

It’s a trap. You know it, Rollo knows it… and Bjorn, oh he knows you’re baiting him for a reaction, like the self-serving omega girl you are. Always in need of more affection. It works. Rollo looks to Bjorn, reading his heated gaze lingering upon your body standing before him. It’s a careful game he plays between the two of you. He steps behind you, his ringed fingers snatch your shoulders.

“Something fitted and rich.” Rollo drags his hands over your loose sleeves, caressing them. Bjorn sits upright, swinging his boots onto the other side of the bench. His legs bounce and bounce as he listens with teeth clenched. “Around the breasts-- and around the hips.”

“Wouldn’t that cling to my stomach?” You ask.

“Of course. That way, when you are with child, you can show it off.” By now, Rollo’s fingertips have swept over your stomach, calculating in every sweep of his fingertips. His soft touch is far from the brash warrior you heard in stories as a girl. You were told that Rollo was a beast of a man who left children in his wake and sundered families.

“I’m not interested in having babies yet.” You laugh it off.

“Maybe not.” Rollo shifts to look over at a servant whose hands are heavy with fabric. Her eyes look down in furtive regard as if-if she focused hard enough she could disappear altogether into the stone floors. “Bring that here.”

The servant girl walks to her master and offers up the goods in her arms. Bjorn’s eyes narrow upon the priceless gown that Rollo unrolls from her, throwing jewelry into his throne. It’s some sort of fine silk with a tailored neckline that is modestly low.

“Now this dress is fit for a princess.” Rollo states.

“Well, it does like beautiful.” You glaze your eyes over the fabric, jealously looking toward the fine silk.

“Would you like it?” Rollo asks, enjoying the glisten in your eyes. Excitement unfurls in your belly and he knows it.  

“Then you should take that rag off.”

Without concern for your husband nor anyone else in the room, you loosen the ties on the back of your dress and dip down. Bjorn’s eyes widen and focus upon your movements, peeling the layers of dress from your thin ankles.

“Beautiful,” Rollo says in a slow, calculated tone. Rollo’s eyes are indecipherable and wrought in obfuscation as the women in the room gasp clearly unable to understand the intentions of a woman that would peel away her clothes in the presence of an estranged uncle-in-law and a husband who at that very moment, whirls his cup across the room.

It’s the start of the end-- because you hear Bjorn’s ripping steps behind you. He pants in his heavy steps. You could feel his anger frothing and in fact, you nearly taste it on your tongue barreling past you. The statuesque guards animate to bring up sword and shield but its already too late with Bjorn’s hands digging into his uncle’s tunic, whirling him around off the steps only to toss him across the stone floors.

“Leave him! Get out.” Rollo holds up his hands, feigning as if he had no intention to fight his nephew. Bjorn storms down the steps, fisting Rollo’s lavish tunic with one hand and raising his fist up with the other. The blows collide with his uncle’s face in something subhuman-- as if something had switched off for Bjorn, chucking his uncle to the floor over and over again.

A final punch leaves Rollo bloody and strewn on the floor, but the only reason it was a final punch-- and not just another punch?

“Are you done yet?” You say not the least bit concerned for the old, ex-Viking. Bjorn rolls about, dilated eyes focusing on you waving forward and back, your hands on your hips. Naked and oh, so proud, sitting upon one of the arms of the throne.

You were bating him! He drops Rollo’s collar and stands upright. He’s coming for you-- and the only thing you do? Giggle and run your hands through your lavish long hair. Bjorn barrels up the stairs, huffing in annoyance when you don’t move for a thing but instead, reach out to stroke his cock through his trousers that were wound into ties. He jerks you up from his uncle’s throne and-- in response, you grip the arms of the chair. A hand holds you in place behind your neck. You scrunch your shoulders up, eyes screwing shut tight as the round head of your husband’s cock prods for your hole.

He sinks inside of your soaked hole, dropping his other hand to the back of your neck. You were enjoying this-- the attention from Bjorn in the middle of a now empty throne room. Well, empty but for Rollo rolling up to sit, watching his nephew’s pleasure splashing over Bjorn’s face.

“You’ve forgotten who I am.” Bjorn throws a spiteful look over his shoulder. Rollo staggers up to stand, a look indecipherable to you on his facial expressions when you look over your shoulder. But Bjorn can read it as clear as any man could with a wife that was appealing to the rivaling alpha males. Especially a wife that was an omega, a precious one at that.

Rollo thought himself exceedingly good at the art of artifice, but he wasn’t-- and this was what he had to show from it. His hips drawback, punching out forceful breaths as he draws his hips harder, faster, more intent on christening the crown with his heathen spunk. Rollo watches from afar, your breasts jiggling as he moves. The words flow from his lips, soft and husky as he turns his hooded gaze back to you, the hand on the back of your neck holding you submissively below him on the chair.

“Your father and I shared once,” Rollo says as if its an afterthought. The wrong afterthought as he speaks of Lagertha, his mother. Bjorn knows that much to be true. Bjorn says nothing else, knowing that perhaps Rollo’s idea of sharing might be to keep him in this Frankish hell. No.

“But you’ve forgotten who I am, uncle. I am Bjorn Ironside.” Bjorn barks out, booming the walls of the throne room. The words shoot straight down to your cunt-- causing you to clench him with more purpose, even if at this angle, that almost felt impossible. “I don’t share. Isn’t that right, (Y/N)? Tell him.”

“No.” You disobey him blatantly.

You grit your teeth together, the stubborn little omega that you are doesn’t let you concede to it. He’ll have to work harder if he wants you to say that. Even if you are bent over Rollo’s throne, nails digging curling indentations into the wood with your husband pounding your pussy raw over, and over, and over again.

“Tell him!” He booms.

“Fuck you.” You snap back in quick work of your tongue. Bjorn’s hand snaps back over your ass, giving you a sharp rippling slap for what you said. His large palm leaves a nasty red print, welts sure to last as with every second of your disobedience, you deserve another and then another. Your eyes squeeze tight together and form a ridge of wrinkles, holding out on crying out for him yet again as your pussy throbs around his cock. It’s what Bjorn wants.

“Tell him, wife. Tell him all about whose woman you are.”

He wants your screams to infest this Frankish stronghold-- to spill out of the room and show his prowess. Prince of the Danes, Bjorn Ironside, soon to become king. Your stubbornness pisses him off and despite your eyes straining to focus on the precious cushion, you’re aware of the fact that you’re soaking him in juices. Your muscles quiver as they strain to hold you up upon the chair. At last, a shout falls from your lips, wrenching louder and louder with one of Bjorn’s hands between your legs, leasing your engorged lips in teasing spirals before seeking out the perfect combination to leave your shouts into barely recognizable groans.

The work of his fingers reminds you of the first time you met him by your elder sister Aslaug’s side. Surfacing from the water after a long breath and praying that Ragnar’s men hadn’t seen you-- but Bjorn, Bjorn always saw you. He saw right through your antics and right now, with his dick stretching and filling your pussy with every fuck of his hips, you knew he knew you for just who you were.

“I’m -is, I’m his, I’m his! Bj-- Bjjorn, Bjjjjorn ple-ase!” It doesn’t matter that your words are nonsensical. Only that you’ve said them, and more than that, Rollo hears them with his ale to his lips.

“There you go.” Bjorn leans over you as you descend into the burning white roiling pleasure that claims you. He opens and closes his mouth with sharp puffs as you gush, exalted in your pleasure. You’ve cum without him by far-- but your bear of a husband pants louder and louder with his intent on using you for his pleasure. Nevermind that your clit felt raw from your orgasm. It didn’t take long, or rather, it didn’t feel like it did with his thick muscles shifting against your back. He plunges deep, filling you with his seed while his forehead rests against your back, cringing the whole way through. You pray that he wouldn’t pop a knot this time because the humiliation would be thick.

No such luck.

Rollo sits drinking his ale, waiting for his nephew’s knot to go down. As soon as it does, Bjorn tucks himself away and jerks you to stand back up.

“Get your dress.” He demands.

“She can take the new one,” Rollo says from down the stairs. “It’s fit for a queen.”

Bjorn says nothing as your dress in silk and a sheer overlay, clinging to his arm dressed in Frankish jewels. Then, he extends his hand out to you.

“Come shieldmaiden. We’ll see Rollo on the boat.” He says, dragging your arm closer to him. You glance after your shoulder, waving playfully to him. This time, however, Bjorn tugs your arm close to his chest. He leans in before speaking. “If you ever try and leave my bed again, I’ll tie you to it.”

@igetcarriedawaywithyou, @kylobien, @titty-teetee, @breathlessouls, @nejijjeoroo, @bcat1291, @readsalot73, @mslothbrok, @romanchronicles, @captstefanbrandt, @ailucascen, @michaeliskindahot, @cbouvier23, @naaladareia, @cbouvier23, @the-geeky-engineer, @dorned, @lisinfleur, @funmadnessandbadassvikings, @tephi101, @akamaiden, @ethereallysimple, @venusloviing, @happylittlepuppydog, @beyond-the-ashes, @slutforrpg, @hipsternoionlylikeunicorns, @mixedwiththemoon, @sparklemichele, @alicedopey, @lif3snotouttogetyou, @rubyquartzshades, @noregretsandyeteveryregret, @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol, @deathbyarabbit, @unacceptabletatertots, @beyond-the-ashes (no sig), @babypink224221, @ivarandersen, @queen-see-ya-in-valhalla, @moose-squirrel-asstiel, @icarus-fell-in-spring, @end-of-night, @gruffle1, @lol-haha-joke @arses21434,  @smileyparrots, @Moosemittens13, @miss-artemis-wild, @two-unbeatable-beaters, @wonderwoman292, @wish-i-was-a-mermaid, @fangirls94, @mcuimxgine, @killerb00sdeath, @heartbeats-wildly, @boo20017, @acacheofstrange, @shaelyn102, @astoryoffireandlight, @smokealone, @shaelyn102 @laketaj24, @peaceisadirtyword, @ly--canthrope@cris101071 @daughterofthenight117 @unassumingviking , @inforapound @wichesterwife27 , @ladyofsoa @sincerelysinister

[xathia-89]

Chandeliers Part 1

It was a ball beyond anything that Japan had seen in recent years. Chandeliers had been bought in especially for the evening, the best champagne and sake had been sourced, and they had hired only the best in terms of waiters, chefs and security.

It made Shingen smirk to himself as he nursed the cognac in his hand. The Emperor had gone all out for this one as his friend, Kenshin was stood next to him and watching the room with a keener eye than the Duke of Kai could manage while knocking back enough sake that would tranquilise an elephant. He secretly suspected that the man had several livers, or he was a robot running on sake.

His date for the evening was a perky little girl who spent her life at these parties, she was all looks and no brains, but it was an easy date who didn’t complain at Shingen for his lack of commitment. Kenshin would often scoff at the man, but the two would never turn each other down for some gambling or drinking together. She was about to drag him onto the dance floor, amongst the spinning masses and allow him to possibly read the room some more. There had been no formal reasoning for the ball, but there were so many rumours flying around that it was nearly impossible to pin it down.

Then he spotted one of his contacts also on the floor. A daughter of a Lord, and as knowledgeable as they can. She inclined her head to the Duke as they caught each other’s eye. She would be his next dance partner, as he purposely spun off his date to meet up with Chiyome.

“Apparently there’s a princess present, from one of those little known places,” she smiled, performing her part in the dance perfectly as they breezed past several other nobles. “She’s meant to be a pretty face, but I’m not sure what nation she comes from or how far up in the line to the throne she is.”

“You’re slipping,” Shingen teased, spinning the woman away with grace.

“They’re playing this one close to the chest, she may even be looking for a husband,” Chiyome replied, ignoring the comment. “Would you even want to be considered as a potential husband?”

“I like what I do,” Shingen began, but a pointed look from the woman made him falter. Technically there was the expectation of continuing the line with a wife, but it was always something that he had put off, saying he wasn’t ready.

The song promptly ended, and then the room just seemed to turn to the platform at the far end of the ballroom.

“His Imperial Majesty, Emperor Naruhito!” The speaker announced, giving way to a room bursting into applause.

Shingen had already laid eyes on a few individuals who he had never gotten on with, including the Duke of Azuchi and the Duke of Mikawa. Both of whom were standing with the Earl of Osaka and looking equally disinterested in being present. He could assume safely that the Duke of Oshu would be around somewhere, probably within the range of the food and kitchens, and it was often that the Earl of Tanba would be about as well.

The Emperor’s speech was full of riddles, entrapping Chiyome’s attention as she stayed with her arm hooked in his.

Until she sharply pulled him down to meet her hissing voice.

“My rumour was true. A princess is looking for a husband!”

Shingen was trying to hold in his smirk until he locked eyes with the Earl of Tanba, who was also probably sharing that tidbit of information with the three men.

“-and I am delighted to introduce Princess Sienna of Rutwaki to Japan,” the Emperor was smiling like a man introducing his daughter at her debut.

The building shook with a force that hadn’t been experienced before. Shingen was keeping Chiyome upright, but the walls weren’t sounding so secure.

“Fire!” A staff member yelled and plunged the room into a panic.

Everyone was rushing now for the exit, expelled from their stupor and stunned status and in the need to survive. Shingen was being dragged by the woman on his arm, screams of terror and shouts of direction filled the air as the telltale noise of the structure failing was now the soundtrack to the event.

Names were being shouted through the air, and indistinguishable from each other.

“Shingen!” One of his longtime friends ran up to him, physically checking him over as Chiyoma waved her goodbye to go and find her father.

“I’m fine, Yuki,” he promised, trying to catch his breath on the grand lawn. It was a chaotic storm of staff and guests, not that anyone was in charge truly while trying to work out just what to do.

“You can thank Princess Sienna for this!” A mad cackle attracted the focus of the madness, and another explosion wrecked the building, sending up more debris, shaking the floor and plunging the whole place into further disarray.

The following morning showed the extent of the damage. Thankfully, no one had been killed, just a few people with broken bones and smoke inhalation who were treated at the local hospital on the Emperor’s insistence and expense. It was all over the news, and the focus was on the fact that the idiots had blamed Princess Sienna for their actions. A lot of the newsreaders were calling for her to go home, but it soon became apparent on the internet that things obviously weren’t that simple.

Shingen was staying with Kenshin, it didn’t feel normal at all to go home and sleep, instead, they were both glued to the news.

A knock to the door surprised them both, before Kenshin’s head butler let himself into the lounge area.

“Terribly sorry sir, there’s a rather insistent messenger who claims to be from the Royal Palace with a message for you and Duke Takeda,” his accent was clipped and precise, as to be expected from someone with his level of experience.

“Send him in then, I haven’t tried my swords out in some time,” Kenshin’s smile was haunting, and the other men knew he spoke the truth in not hesitating to strike a man down if he was in the mood.

The messenger was dressed in the royal crest and colours, a formal outfit that was seen on the inside of the palace only before he bowed swiftly to the two Dukes in front of him, before pulling out two letters. Both of them were stamped with the Emperor’s personal wax seal. Something that neither of the men had seen before, it was something that was only mentioned in the circles they drifted in. This was obviously something valuable from their Emperor before the messenger disappeared as quickly as he arrived.

“I get the feeling we’re about to find out more about the ball,” Shingen spoke with an uncertainty, weighing the envelope up with a great distaste.

***

Sienna was shaken to the core.

She hadn’t taken those threats seriously, everyone on her security detail had declared them to be trivial and merely to stir up fear. Now she had brought danger to another nation, and she didn’t blame the news reports one bit.

Her security was fired the second the Emperor had to take her in under his protection.

Now he was under arrest for giving the incumbents an opening to kill people.

Sienna was truly alone in a foreign country, though it wasn’t for the first time. It was the first time she was facing such a backlash for being herself though.

She had grown up in the British education system under the best private schooling that money could buy. Her mother had sent her away until she was eighteen to learn, without her father’s permission. She had been jailed for that action, but it was refused to return the princess on the basis that there was no need for a forceful extraction after she had voiced at the age of twelve that she wished to finish her education. Her friendship with two princes had always stirred international headlines, but there was never any romantic attachment between any of them, and she was just glad for the company and to have people who understood.

Her country was very set in its ways. Men were the rulers and were always in charge. Women were there to make house and children, and it was said the best way a woman could ‘repay her husband’ was to bear him a son to carry on his lineage. The education was clearly split between the genders, with women trained to do the housework and how to look after children, while men were educated for a career. Domestic violence was rife, and the bigamy laws were never enforced. If a man wanted a woman, and she wasn’t married, then the woman had no defence. Her only way to escape it would be to marry another man before she could be wed to him.

Sienna was also the King’s only child. She was the legitimate and sole heir to the throne, much to the disgust of the aristocracy. Even any mistress had failed to bear an heir, her father was impotent by all means, but it was only the woman’s fault, of course. It was disgusting to know what was expected of women in this era in her country.

They had tried marriages of all sorts between Sienna and the various Lords and their sons of Rutwaki. All failures of the highest degree. There was even a rumour that her father was reportedly going to bed her in order to produce a valid heir for the throne. Something that Sienna had previously dismissed as a fallacy, but now she was scared to return home without at least a fiancé.  

The Emperor had taken her in out of sheer kindness, and their discussions were long ongoing. With repeated interruptions from staff members until it was confirmed that Civil War was brewing at her home. It left her with a difficult situation before she loathed to ask the Emperor if there was any way that Japan could help her.

His falter told her everything, and she smiled.

“I take no offence, you have gone out of your way as is, I can appreciate that this is a delicate matter,” Sienna had been all grace last night, but the Emperor had told her should she marry someone of significance from Japan then they could definitely argue intervention in the parliament.

The Emperor had called a morning tea with some of the bachelors of the aristocracy. Not that she was expecting this to be anything beyond a marriage of convenience. Saving her country was her priority right now, and this was the only way to do it that would cease the impending civil war.

A knock at the door brought her out of her trance, and the maids came in with a new outfit for her to wear for the event. A pale pink skirt with heavy netting that made it fluff out, and fell to just below her knees, and a simple shirt with sleeves to the elbow, and a faux cross front in just off white. She would look the soft wife to be in this combination, nothing like her true self that would be hidden until she could ensure that things were going smoothly.

Shingen was more than a little suspicious on his arrival with Kenshin to the Royal Palace in the mid-morning chaos. They weren’t the only ones who had been invited as Yukimura and Sasuke were also present, and then a string of other men.

A middle-aged man and woman were stood in front of the giant doors to the private tea rooms. Neither of them had spoken or even moved since anyone had arrived until a loud ring sounded out for silence was in the hand of the man, and the entrance was bolted shut.

“You have all been summoned here as a preliminary for meeting Princess Sienna,” the man opened. Shingen swore he looked so stiff that he was expecting to need some oil in his joints, but there was a seriousness that couldn’t be laughed off.

“You will go through several tests to whittle your numbers down and ensure the best chances for the Princess,” the woman stated. “Please stand around the edge of the dance floor and you will be called forward by name to show your etiquette.”

The tests were simple. It was ensuring that the man could actually dance, had the appropriate level of manners, could eat correctly at such events, how they presented themselves and their knowledge on Japan as a country. It surprised Shingen more how many of the fellow aristocrats couldn’t do it all. There were eleven of them in the end, and the tension was palpable.

“I see these are the gentlemen who could stand up to the global view then,” the Emperor spoke from behind them, startling the room as the staff then appeared exasperated. The Princess was on his arm, looking demure and feminine before she glanced over the candidates. “There was no point in allowing for those unable to uphold the scrutiny of the world to be put forward. This is a marriage which could define Japan of course,” he stated and caught several of them off-guard.

Then the Emperor’s gaze was on Shingen, before switching to Masamune. The two of them were known womanisers. If marriage was the end goal, then it was likely to not be him.

“I can tell from your gaze who to avoid,” the Princess spoke sharply and demanded the attention of the room. “Duke Shingen Takeda of Kai, and Duke Masamune Date of Oshu. Both of whom are not going to shine the best light on Japan, and will dig up more gossip than I could already cope with aside from ceasing a brewing civil war in my own country.”

Nobunaga Oda was captivated by the woman’s voice and defiance. She was everything that she didn’t look like. She knew why she was doing this before the princess was shown to a seat by the Emperor, and she was going to make them all work to impress her for sure.

[nikitasbt]

Taiwanese New Wave cinema of Hou Hsiao-hsien: A City of Sadness & Flowers of Shanghai

The emergence of Taiwanese New Wave in filmmaking traces back to 1982 when the young directors started working upon realistic films depicting social problems of the country. It was the last decade of the White Terror, and the directors received more freedom in their work. The most internationally acclaimed directors from Taiwanese New Wave are Edward Yang, Tsai Ming-liang and Hou Hsiao-hsien. A City of Sadness and Flowers of Shanghai are two great films representing the work, style and most important themes of Hou Hsiao-hsien. From my point of view, it is the right choice to begin with for those who would like to get down to the modern cinema of Taiwan.

A City of Sadness (悲情城市, Bēiqíng chéngshì) - 1989

A City of Sadness is an epic historical Taiwanese drama, the first film to deal with the events of so-called Incident 228 and White Terror. The 1989 Golden Lion-winning film A City of Sadness might be a bit difficult to follow unless the viewers know a few facts behind the historical events depicted on the screen. Incident 228 is the crucial and dramatic episode of the Taiwanese history, which is almost as painful and traumatic for Taiwanese history as Nanjing massacre (if there is anything in this world to compare with those events) for the Chinese history. The incident took place on the 28th of February 1947. At this time, the Republic of China was practically part of China as it has been handed to China after the unconditional surrender of Japan ending long-lasting Japanese rule in Taiwan. While the Kuomintang party was still involved in the civil war on the mainland, the uprising had started in Taipei. It has been triggered on 28 February and was brutally repelled by the Kuomintang governmental forces of Chen Yi. The estimated death toll was about 5000-30000. The martial law has been introduced to last for the next 40 years till 1987. Before lifting the martial law, the topic of 40-years of the supreme power of Kuomintang and White Terror was taboo sort of thing for filmmakers. The film of Hou casts light on those contradictory events taking place in the Republic of China.

It is obvious that the director had to stay out of strong political criticism making the film, as it was still 1989. He tries to show the White Terror in a neutral way giving an example of the life of one extended family. He shows the family in the 1940s covering several years and jumping from older events to the subsequent years. Zhang Yimou would later make something similar related to Chinese history in his To Live (1994). While Zhang Yimou is showing the resilience of Chinese people, Hou charges his feature-length film with the fear, becoming an essential part of people's everyday life. A City of Sadness recreates the events of the 1940s where corruption was under control, and everybody could have been arrested for far-fetched accusations for bonds with guerillas or without any accusations at all. The life of The Lin family we see on the screen is destroyed by the Terror, as one brother dies at the war, the other one is assassinated, the third one suffers brain injury and the last one gets arrested.

Many episodes focus at the protagonists whispering or speaking silently to show everybody is under surveillance. They are afraid of talking since you can get arrested for anything. This is probably why Hou shoots very often through the doors like somebody is always watching while people talk or ruminate. The director makes a great and ironical move introducing the protagonist Wen-ching (portrayed by Tony Leung Chiu-wai). Wen-ching is deaf-mute, and it seems like this the way one can take the things better - not hearing what is happening around and not sharing the opinion. However, Wen-ching gets arrested several times before he finally disappears in the jails. Moreover, the director uses Wen-ching to illustrate the linguistic conflict of post-war times, which was another part producing tension in Taiwan. The irony is that the dialogues in A City of Sadness are present in 5 languages and different dialects, while the protagonist is both deaf and mute to understand it.

Despite the fear and horror we observe, one can hardly say that Hou Hsiao-hsien judged those times very harshly. It is obvious, we see that the events of suppression were awful and it led many families to collapse. However, it was the price the nation had to pay to become stable. The price was certainly too high from the modern point of view, but Hou Hsiao-hsien doesn't give us a strict answer on how to take it. He only acts as a chronicler depicting the drastically important historical events of Taiwan in a perfect way, with dim colours and severe atmosphere of fear. A City of Sadness is a long thought-provoking film disclosing the establishment of Taiwanese nation after the II World War, and it is certainly worth watching, from the historical perspectives.

Flowers of Shanghai (海上花, Hai shang hua) - 1998

The theme of desperate and hopeless life of courtesans was one of the pivotal motifs for another master of the Oriental cinema Kenji Mizoguchi. The Japanese director came up with this topic in The Woman in the Rumour and Street of Shame. The courtesans of Mizoguchi don't live in poverty, yet there is no hope for better living for them. The female protagonists from the story of XIX century writer Han Bangqing are somehow similar, and Hou Hsiao-hsien employs this story for his Flowers of Shanghai screenplay.

We see the scenes from several rich Shanghai brothels (or flower houses) designed for wealthy clients. These are the flower houses where only a few girls live, and they serve to the clients who spend days and hours with them again and again. The wealthy men come here to dine, gamble, smoke opium, splurge money, bring expensive gifts to the women. The houses are also used for arranged marriages. Every scene is enriched with dense colours and gorgeous decorations. The smoke of opium and gossips both courtesans and their wealthy patrons soak in this atmosphere of fake paradise. These men seemingly have forgotten about their life outside the flower houses as the scenes of the film never go beyond the brothel. The women get lots of money from the clients, but their debts also grow. We see women fading away as time goes by, and men being enthralled by the stunning allure of these courtesans, elegance of ornate ambiance and smoke of opium. The wealthy patrons illustrate drug-addled passion and emptiness of tremendous wealth, while the women act as more pragmatic characters seeking to escape their cages in the flower houses. Though they end up learning they belong there, and very of few of them would have a chance to escape, just like in Mizoguchi's films about courtesans.

The influence of Mizoguchi can be also observed in the style Hou develops in Flowers of Shanghai. It is described by a particular way of mise-en-scèn creation and subtle beauty of slow-paced story-telling Kenji Mizoguchi was famous for. Hou enhances the film with something magnetic and mesmerizing which would be growing on the viewers after they had seen the film. This is a very atmospheric and gracious film which is shot entirely in swoon-like long takes which is another courtesy to Mizoguchi's favourite cinematic technique. The most impressive long take is probably the opening 7-minute scene at the dining table in flower house: nothing, but wonderful and artificial paradise we glance at.

To tell the stories of oppressed lives of courtesans Crimson, Jade, Emerald, Jasmine, Pearl and other girls Hou had the fantastic cast in his possession: Michiko Hada, Michelle Reis, Carina Lau, Vicky Wei. The story though revolved around wealthy patron Wang portrayed by Tony Leung Chiu-wai delivering the great performance in collaboration with Hou once again after A City of Sadness. It is spectacular to observe these tense situations the courtesans are involved in, as we see a lot of peculiarities and details of Chinese culture, customs, and traditions of the XIX century. Nevertheless, Flowers of Shanghai is the movie that preliminary draws attention with the unique and sublime aesthetics.

[sunaddicted]

hiii... first I love all your 00qad fics <3 and if you're still taking prompts, maybe something with a bit more focus on alex? maybe he's ill or has something to hide? whatever you like :)

Hi! Thank you for the hyper sweet message ♡♡♡ I hope I did your request justice because I never feel as if I’m good enough at portraying Alex lol

Alex wasn’t used to being the focus of so many people - by which, he meant his partners. His speciality, after all, it had always been to blend in with the background: he appeared so ordinary and unremarkable that he went forgotten in people’s minds, faded as a photograph exposed to sunlight for too many years. And, while a thousand of gazes barely registered his presence, Alex stole their secrets.

He was a different kind of spy from James who, to be honest, wouldn’t know the meaning of subtlety even if they made him read it up on the dictionary every day - it just wasn’t in James’ style, making use of the shadows for more than just a executing shot to the head.

They were polar opposites but still James was wrapped around Alex, showing his affection in the only way he knew how to - physically. Which didn’t necessarily mean sex, Alex had discovered; in the beginning of their relationship, influenced by MI6 gossip, he had believed the rumours that depicted the man as sexually insatiable and emotionally unavailable.

The truth was, much like Alex himself, that James hadn’t grown up in a living environment and he didn’t know anything more natural than showing love in a physical manner, the words to express himself escaping him. Which was also the reason why, despite being so radically different, Alex felt like he had a connection to James and enjoyed every single one of his embraces, relaxing against the other’s broad chest.

Alex stretched a little and immediately one hand was on his forehead, obviously checking the temperature “I’m fine” he murmured up at Danny, smiling in reassurance to the younger man as he took his fingers and brought them to his lips, kissing them tenderly.

With his sweetness and too big heart, Danny brought into their relationship what neither James nor Alex could: a love so pure and easily expressed that it almost made Alex’s soul ache with the need of protecting him, making sure that the evils of the world didn’t tarnish him - that serenity and blind trust were just too much of a precious gift.

“He truly is fine” James reassured Danny, tightening a bit his grip on the waist in his arms as he bestowed a kiss on slightly sweaty skin, just under where the other man’s hairline begun.

Saying that Alex liked it, it would have been an euphemism because, while he was glad that he was capable of protecting Danny, he loved the fact that he could let himself relax without worry thanks to James, who would always be there to guard his back. Alex had never felt protected - not until up to the moment when James had entered his life and quietly gained his love and trust.

“And, since James’ word hardly is law, I’ll confirm that Alex really is well with the thermometer” Q chimed in, appearing as suddenly and silently as his cats would when they played hunting around the house; swiftly, he stuck the thermometer - one of those that were supposed to have disappeared from people’s houses because unsafe - under Alex’s armpit and looked down at the watch on James’ wrist, taking the time.

“Thank you, mother” he teased lightly.

Alex often puzzled about Q. He was a difficult man to love, despite the fact that he was the one he had more things in common with - they both were geniuses who got lost in their own minds; people of few words that appeared witty in public, but that in the privacy of their homes could be incredibly awkward; they were rational and they saw the world in numbers, strings of code, variables.

But whereas Alex thought of himself as a polite man with a quiet demeanour, Q had a sharp-edged and restless personality that often clashed with the people surrounding him. To Alex, it almost seemed as if Q’s genius was too much sometimes - clearly not having been nurtured and cherished in his youth, Q’s cleverness had become more of a curse rather than a blessing for the younger man.

Maybe it was that what Q brought to balance out their relationship: the excitement outside of the field without which neither Alex nor James would have been capable of staying tethered to a relationship for so long - a shot of adrenaline whenever Q smirked with a knowing expression, teasing them all out to play.

The thermometer was yanked away from his armpit and Q squinted down at it “36.8 °C” he declared “Perfectly healthy again: I told you that what he needed was just some rest and meds but no, you had to try all the stupid methods you found on the internet first” Q scolded James and Danny, shaking his head in disapproval.

Alex snorted: certainly, it wasn’t Q’s frequent “I told you so"s that he so much loved about the younger man.

[fictoryismine]

NIGHT SKY CHANGING OVERHEAD

C H A P T E R  O N E : Storm’s a Brewin’ (AO3) (FFN)

Prologue (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

It had been a particularly cold December day. It seemed as though nearly everyone in Tokyo was feeling completely run down, with how quickly autumn had come and gone. The days were becoming much shorter and everything was a dreary gray. But Minako knew that something other than just the weather had been off about her friend Makoto. She just couldn't shake the nagging feeling that something was wrong. She'd been fighting with herself all evening, debating whether it would be prying or helping, before finally deciding to make contact on her communicator.

"Jupiter here!" Mako answered her call with a sense of urgency, always ready for a fight, knowing at any moment they could be thrown into battle.

"It's Venus." She was using her alias. Luna had recently scolded them again about using their civilian names when using their communicators, worried about security breaches and all of that. Even though Ami swore time and time again the devices were impenetrable, the cats couldn’t help but stress that the less their enemies knew about their personal lives, the better.

Sounding worried Makoto asked, "Hey Venus– Still there? What's up? Where's the youma? Is everybody okay?"

Mina laughed a little, "No, no... It's nothing like that! Everything's alright, but... Can I come over?"

"Uh, sure.” The brunette had obviously been caught off guard, Mina could picture her surveying her apartment. “Just take your time. Lemme tidy up, first, 'kay?"

Mina felt kind of bad about using the communicators for her own personal reasons, but what Luna had been completely unaware of was that Mako-chan had recently cut her phone line. The bill was one more added expense that made it just that much harder for her to stay in school. --- It was hard enough for her when teachers would complain about her grades, how she would be able to get all As and Bs instead of Cs if she wasn't always almost falling asleep in class. The teacher would make some judgemental remark about how all she had to do was go to bed earlier, like it was really all so simple. Another sore spot was when they would scold Makoto about letting herself get distracted with people who would just slow her down, like Usagi.

For most criticisms, Makoto would usually make an empty promise that she’d work harder, while she tried not to roll her eyes, but no one could ever question her friendship with Usagi. Makoto worried that without Usagi, not only would she still be a friendless loner, but she might have ended up moving again and never would've met the people who now meant the most in the world to her. Without Usagi she would’ve never met Ami, or Rei or Mina... or Ami.

She smirked a little to herself, realizing she named the blue haired genius twice. She knew that she had really come to care for all the other senshi – even the Outers now played a pretty consistent role in her life – but she had grown to cherish Ami most of all.

Usagi wasn't a burden, or the reason that her grades were the way they were. It also hurt that she knew Ami had been told the same thing about both Usagi and Makoto. Teachers never even bothered to get to know them before judging them.

Once, after school, Makoto had come around the corner to meet Ami at her locker and overheard her in conversation with two faculty members. The principal spoke softly, praising the girl for putting their school back on the map. "Mizuno-san, you have the highest grades in Juuban, the highest grades in Tokyo, maybe even all of Japan! You will be able to get into any school you dream of." The other man, a science teacher who always seemed to have it out for Makoto, was playing the bad cop and said, "Do you really want to jeopardize all of that just to eat lunch with a delinquent like Kino-san and an idiot slacker like Tsukino-san?"

Makoto had felt gutted, even though Ami assured the teacher that her studies came first, which was always the easiest way out of being awkwardly cornered like that. Mako was conflicted. She wished that Ami didn't have senshi responsibilities and could have the freedom to focus all of her attention onto her studies, but she also wished that Ami had told him how important her friendships were to her.

It would almost destroy her, but Makoto promised herself for both their sakes, if there ever came a time when Ami needed Makoto to leave her alone, she would go. She prayed that she'd never be asked to. Of course, Jupiter's shared commitment to the princess would still be there, but Makoto Kino would be a distant memory. After all, she had made herself disappear before.

Mako had wondered if, without Usagi, maybe she would have given up on Juuban altogether. Maybe she'd be at another school, maybe dropped out of school or worse. She didn't like to think like that. Meeting the princess and the others had really turned her life around, but that didn't mean her life was by any means easy.

When her teachers would tell her that she just wasn't applying herself, she really had to fight the urge to lose her cool, but more than being punished for fighting with authority, she was always so afraid that she'd reach her breaking point and blurt out the truth. Makoto didn't want anyone to know that she was probably the only orphan in her grade, maybe the school, and the only emancipated minor. She worked two jobs, neither of which could give her enough hours. Her employers would always tell her that they were giving her all they could because, "You're just a kid," "There are laws about that sort of thing," and, "You should probably use all that free time to work on your classes."

Mako took the few shifts with a smile. She would keep asking for more hours, but didn’t want them to know how dire her situation was. She didn't need sympathy, she needed money. She wasn't one to make excuses, but she barely had enough to make ends meet.

She had a real problem with taking charity too.

---

'I hope I’m not just wasting my time, trying to help. She's almost as stubborn and proud as Rei-chan. What if I get there and it turns out that I imagined the whole thing, or something is actually wrong and she just won’t tell me?' Minako thought to herself while stepping over a slushy curb.

She knew that she was getting closer to Mako’s apartment complex; there were fewer and fewer street lights as she made her way from her mansion uptown to Mako’s neighbourhood on the rough outskirts. It made her sad to think that the city seemed to care more about the safety of the richer citizens, especially if some of the others were as nice and hardworking as her friend. The senshi had vowed they would always protect anyone in danger, not just those they found deserving.

Even though things were rather dimly lit, the freshly fallen snow reflected what little light there was to make things slightly brighter, and the winter sky had just a hint of a soft pink hue. It was still frigid though. Mina hurried her pace a little, shuddering against the wind, and switched her bulky bag from hand to hand, trying to get a better grip through thick woolen mittens.

She had picked up some cupcakes. She hated to show up uninvited, which she knew was rude enough, but she couldn’t show up empty handed too! Especially once she realized that Mako had so much on her plate lately. She just wanted to cheer her friend up. 'Who doesn't like cupcakes?' she reasoned with herself.

She was almost there. Walking through this particular slum, which was full of long alleyways, always made her a little nervous, but during the winter people tried to stay in as much as they could. It was a mixed blessing: fewer people to run into, but also fewer witnesses if something were to happen. She frowned. Luna and Artemis were always trying to prepare the scouts for the worst case scenario, even one as terrifying as not being able to use their powers. She knew how to fight, but her everyday form still had certain physical limitations.

She would hate to transform into Sailor Venus and risk exposing her true identity just because she’d panicked when some guy got a little too close when he drunkenly slurred, “Hey baby, howsabout you and me?”

She remembered her first year with the girls. Artemis had really whipped her into shape to prepare her to be Sailor V. She wasn't in bad shape, with all of her volleyball tournaments, but now she had to really train.

There was a real advantage in having an extra year of experience under her belt. They were all comfortable training with their powers, but also sparred in their civilian forms. They began trying hand to hand combat, learning strategies, new tactics and different holds.

Usually Mako was hands down the winner. It wasn't uncommon for her to leave a match without so much as a scratch on her, even before they found the silver crystal. She stood at least five inches taller than the other girls, and had been street fighting for years for her own basic survival. At Juuban, there were even rumours about her being in the Yakuza. The other scouts decided it was best to never ask, just in case. It wouldn't do anyone any good to know that sort of thing about their friend, but Mina still sometimes checked her for those tell-tale tattoos when she wasn't looking and she was pretty sure Ami had run background checks on the others.

Luna knew that the brunette excelled at fighting, and would let the amazon sit out to focus on her studies. This often lead to Jupiter opening her text book, getting stumped on a harder question and then asking the cats if her blue haired friend could join her on the porch of the shrine. The cats would grumble a little, knowing Mercury could use the extra training but understood that she was a very fast learner and could pick up on most of the basic drills just by watching.

No one expected Ami to come out on top, but it was still expected that she be able to hold her own in a fight. They each had their place, and more often than not she worked hard to solve other problems – she was usually the one behind their better strategies.

With Makoto being the decided champion time and time again, this left Mina and Rei neck and neck. Though, sometimes when the cats were scolding and berating the moon princess, Mina would slack off a little and either let Rei win or make a point of dramatically toppling right on top of her. "O, I am slain." She sputtered, before closing her eyes.

There was really nothing like being put into a choke hold by the beautiful miko, staring face to face, feeling Rei's long dark bangs brushing against her forehead, and really seeing the fire burning in those amethyst eyes framed with perfect wing-tipped eyeliner, knowing she had only victory on her mind and that she was about to deliver the finishing blow. Then, instead of bracing, completely shattering Rei's concentration by asking if she was wearing a new bra, or if she knew that she smelled really good that day.

Then it was usually just a stunned look and Mina’s foot to Rei’s ribs, and then Mina kneeling beside her with puppy dog eyes. She hated to hurt the other girl, but knew that she could take it. Mina always told herself she was training Rei to be the leader when she wasn't around.

"Don't let yourself get distracted, Mars!" Artemis would yell, barely paying attention.

"I think you cracked a rib that time," Rei wheezed. The wind was knocked out of her, but they weren’t like ordinary people – she’d heal very quickly.

"I'd offer to kiss them better but..." Mina would roll Rei's shirt up just a little, her lips puckered, eyelashes batting.

Rei would only scoff, offended.

"You seem mad, Reiko. Are you mad?" Mina said, distracting the other girl until her breathing returned to normal.

Minako would help her up, feeling the warmth of her hand against hers. Rei always ran much hotter temperature wise, while Ami ran much colder.

Mako didn't really notice. Whenever Minako or Usagi mentioned it in concern, she'd usually just say, "I dunno, maybe a little?" with a shrug. But, like a moth to a flame, Mina was fascinated by it. She couldn't explain it, but a hug from Rei always felt like being blessed with the good fortune to put on clothes straight out of the dryer on a cold day. It was such a little thing, but with it came that kind of warmth that radiated through your entire body and stayed with you for minutes after.

She'd look for any excuse to touch Rei, especially when they'd train at the temple. She really delighted in torturing the dark haired girl – it was just so easy. Rei could be far too serious for her own good.

Minako would reason with herself that sometimes Rei needed to be knocked down a peg. She could be insufferable when she thought that she was completely untouchable. On the field, that kind of cocky attitude could get you and everyone else killed.

She truly believed that one day Rei really would be unstoppable, but until then she would ask the muddy girl under her boot, "What tastes better, dirt or winning? What tastes better, your own blood or knowing no one can stop you?" Mina could have listed more things Rei could taste, but she knew Rei-chan was nowhere ready to hear something like that from her.

She didn't know if she went too far sometimes, but it really seemed to be working. She would laugh – sometimes she wasn't exactly sure what it was that Rei wanted, victory or vengeance, but Mina was motivating her and Rei was determined. If it embarrassed Rei so much to lose, then being kicked down was the only way to really learn to hunger for that sweetness of domination. Once she had a taste and could savour all that she longed for, everything that she had hoped to accomplish, then she would never want to give it up again. Tormenting her was just good leadership, wasn't it?

Every time Mina would knock her down, she would be all the faster the next fight. Her slender frame allowed her to be very agile, and Mina was trying to teach her to use her anger. If she could channel her rage for a fight, and find a way to be level-headed outside of a fight, she'd be every bit as good a fighter as she already thought she was. Mina had no doubt that she'd get there.

Sometimes, if she'd been flirting especially hard, Minako would awkwardy try to catch Rei's eye after the match, but of course, Rei would act like nothing had happened, and so Minako would have to, too.

She arrived at Makoto's apartment. Opening the heavy door, she hit the button beside the name 'KINO.' Unit 206. She buzzed in to let her friend know that she was there, and Mako let her up into the small grey apartment, welcoming her with a hug. Mina wondered if the walls had always been this drab or if the decades had simply stripped them of their vibrancy.

She felt an uncomfortable twinge. Mina was used to a life of luxury and vacations to Europe. Her parents' master bathroom was practically the size of Mako's whole apartment, but even with all the glamour and expense, she felt like their house was much too big. She often felt lonely with just her feline companion.

For someone who mostly lived off of takeout food, Mina always found Mako's kitchen to be the homiest part of the apartment. Even in the dead of winter, Mako would always have fresh cut flowers in a colourful glass vase on the table. The tiled back splash above the sink was a rosy pink. There was usually something delicious cooking on the stove.

The window looked out onto another old apartment, the not-so scenic view of crumbling brick and urban decay. Mako tried to make the best of it with simple floral curtains and by hanging some spider plants. There was hardly a surface in her home that didn't have a potted plant on it.

Mina wasn't anywhere near as shallow as people thought, but Venus’ eye was always drawn to the old, ripped up, second-hand futon. It was clean but stained from age and wear, and served as both Mako's couch and bed.

When the furnace had broken the winter before, Minako had offered for Makoto to stay with her instead, but she wouldn't budge. She continued to say, '"No," the entire week. She kept saying that she was fine, even though she was sleeping in her winter coat.

Minako had wondered how she would survive if she didn't even have any extra blankets, but she had left it as, "The offer is always open." Makoto had extended the same through chattering teeth.

She knew that Mako wouldn't take charity, always stating she had things under control and that if she wanted something, she'd just have to work harder and pay for it herself. She had noticed the same code of honour with Rei. They could both be very generous on their own terms but hated to feel like they owed anyone anything, but Minako would be damned before she'd watch Mako or Rei die out of some stubborn stupidity. Winter had approached quickly and she was finally going to do something about it.

Minako knew she was a pretty good actress and Mako-chan was pretty trusting with her friends. Once she understood that someone wasn't out to hurt her, she would start to let her guard down. If dying together in battle, side by side as soldiers throughout the millennia wouldn't convince her that the blonde had her best interests at heart, then nothing would.

---

Mako let Mina in, welcoming her and hugged her tightly. After the kind of day it was shaping up to be, it was something they probably both needed. Mako saw the melting snowflakes glistening against her golden blonde eyelashes. The cold of the wind still on her rosy cheeks made the rest of her glow. She squinted her bright blue eyes to blink the snow away. She really was something else.

"Well, don't just stand there! Come in! Come in!" Mako joked, but with concern, "If you had stayed out any longer you'd be as blue as your fuku!" They all wore the same navy school uniform now, except for Rei who still wore grey.

Makoto had been so glad to be done with junior high and able to get rid of that hideous old uniform. There hadn’t been anything in her size, so she had had to wear that old, dingy-looking, brown one, which made her being the new kid even more obvious. She hated anything that made her stick out more. She had worried at first that someone would tell her she was wearing the wrong uniform, that she didn’t fit in, that she didn't even look like she went to their school, and pretty soon make her feel like she didn’t fit in their whole town. No matter where she went it was like someone was already waiting to laugh at her hopes of finally having a second chance.

Mina was still taking off her red hooded cloak. She undid the golden clasp, a delicate chain latched over a large shiny button. She stooped to untie black boots and laughed. “Blue as your fuku! That’s a good one. I’ve gotta remember that!”

She wondered what would happen should Makoto ever decide to use that line on Ami. Venus pictured poor Mercury blushing at the taller girl's flirting. There was just something so inviting about Jupiter's smile that you couldn't help but feel genuinely wanted.

She announced that she had brought some treats, and Mako was more than happy to put on a pot of tea. Mina sat on an old wooden chair that squeaked against the linoleum and watched Mako take down two mugs, as they waited for the water to boil.

"So, why'd you want to see me, Mina?" Mako asked, putting out a medium sized cup in front of her. "Not that I'm not happy to see you," she added.

"Oh, do I need a reason to see my favourite..." The blonde let out a sigh. "Honestly? I just thought you seemed down lately. I wanted to make sure you were okay is all."

"Oh." Mako took a breath and wondered if she should expose herself or play it off. After all, the only thing in the whole world that she'd wanted tonight was some company and she'd got it without even having to ask. She couldn't ask for much more than that. This was no time to feel sorry for herself. If someone had gone through all this just to ask how she was doing, maybe the truth would feel good for a change. It might be nice to get something off her chest for once.

"I didn't mean to worry you. Honest. I was just, I dunno, lonely, I guess," Makoto answered with a shrug.

Mina couldn't stop herself from putting her foot in her mouth. "How can you be lonely with all of us?" She knew it was stupid but had said it anyway.

Mako became very still and uncomfortable. After a moment she took a breath and started to say, "It's not that. You guys are –" The kettle whistled, snapping her from her thoughts. She took it off of the hot stove element. "Sorry about that. Great. You guys are great, but I needed someone today and well." She furrowed her brow, closed her eyes and said, "I miss my mom and dad." She puffed out her cheeks a little, feeling awkward.

Mina nodded. "Christmas is hard sometimes. Like, everyone else is with their families and so happy and making plans and having traditions. I get it."

"Yeah, but, it's not just Christmas. It's, uh, other holidays too. I miss them every day and nobody cares about me the same way that they did. I know you care. I know you do, but sometimes I still feel like it's just me on my own, and I wanted this year to be different. I didn't want to be forgotten."

"What do you mean, forgotten?" Minako tore at the cupcake wrapper, a little put out that her effort was going unnoticed. 'I'm here, aren't I?' she thought to herself. "We try our best to hang out on holidays, but we all have our own obligations, too. It's not that we don't want to see you."

Mako poured the hot water into the mugs and brought them to the table to steep.

"Rei's grandpa is so old he has a hard time remembering to take care of himself," she went on, "let alone Rei. Her dad is totally a lost cause. He's probably going to get remarried to that new woman he's been hanging around. Then he'll have all new kids to neglect, but he'd still probably treat them better than he ever treated Rei. It all comes down to whatever looks good on the campaign trail. And I know it's hard for her to trust Yuuichirou, 'cause she can't tell if they're friends or he just wants to nail her."

Mina looked down, remembering how jealous she was of that bumbling musician, even though she knew deep down that he wasn’t a bad guy. "He cares about the temple, and he's really committed to it, but he couldn't run the shrine on his own for more than a few days. She could probably do worse."

"Yeah." Makoto agreed half-heartedly.

"Ami's mom loves her so much, but works non-stop, and usually comes home to sleep after Ami has gone to school and is gone again before she gets back, unless she sleeps at the hospital." She blew on her hot tea. "And well, my parents are always away too... I know it's not the same as losing them but I don't think they... Well sometimes I think maybe they don't miss me." Mina admitted. She hoped it wasn't true, but still felt like it was. She sipped her tea and continued. "The only one with normal parents is Usagi, and I don't blame her for wanting to spend time with them... Even Shingo, as annoying as he is, still totally cares about her."

"I know, we all need each other. And you guys are everything to me. I just thought things would be different by now." Mako was grateful that Mina had come over, but was starting to feel a little selfish for even bringing it up.

Not knowing what to say, Mina tried to break the tension and asked, "So then, what is it? It's not like we forgot your birthday or something."

Mako bit her lip and looked away. "Well..." She laughed glibly.

"Fuuuck! It was your birthday, wasn't it? Dammit, why didn't you tell us? We could've all gone to The Crown and Fruits Parlour for sundaes. We would've invited Haruka and Michiru, and even girls from your classes, like Naru... maybe not Umino though. He really gives me the creeps.  Unless you wanted him there, but still! Oh my god!"

Mina remembered that it had come up a couple times that no one seemed to be able to pinpoint when exactly the lightning senshi's birthday was. It dawned on her that in all these years they had never really celebrated her birthday, but whenever they'd ask her she'd say that she didn't want one or would change the subject.

'How can someone be mad that I didn't know something if they kept it a secret?' She thought to herself. 'But Mako-chan doesn't seem mad? Just kinda down. Mako-chan always makes us cakes for our birthdays and we just treat hers like some other day of the year! She's always saying she loves birthdays but goes out of her way to avoid her own.' Minako beat herself up internally.

"It's okay."

"If I had known I would've brought candles for you to blow out! You should make a wish anyways!"

Makoto actually had a surplus of candles in one of the kitchen drawers but it wasn't worth the fuss. Plus, Minako would probably awkwardly serenade her. Those little cakes had been more than enough.

"When was it?"

"It's today. But it's fine, really! I just used to go out with my parents and we'd do really normal family stuff and I miss it. I liked feeling like I was the most important thing in the world to someone."

Mina's eyes widened. "Ami-chan didn't talk to you today, did she?" She suddenly understood Mako's heavy heart.

She shook her head. "Like, I know she's trying to keep her grades up and I want to believe it's because I don't have a phone and it's too cold for her to walk over just to see if I was home. I know that she wouldn't risk making Luna mad by using the communicator for anything other than senshi business, y'know? But the cold doesn't bother her anyway."

Mina frowned and shook her head, "For a such smart girl, she can really miss the big picture sometimes." She sipped her tea, feeling much warmer now.

"Yeah. I mean, she is my best friend... Err... No offense. I mean, I know you're the one who's worried and came all the way down here and all, but..."

"You share a more profound bond, I know. I wasn't going to mention it. So, uh, I think your cupcakes are better than these but they're still pretty good." She wondered if she should give the brunette an easy out. She wasn't used to seeing her quite so vulnerable and didn't want to overwhelm the poor girl on her birthday, especially when this was probably the first time she'd ever talked about this kind of thing quite so openly before.

Makoto smiled. She had known her cooking was probably better, but she still couldn't say no to chocolate. Especially when this was the closest thing to birthday cake she'd had in years. It's true, she had cake all the time, but to be surprised like this was really nice. Then she remembered that they were talking about more than just dessert.

"I guess going to the same school, I just see her more, and Usagi has so many other friends. I just was able to spend more time with her, or something."

"Ha! Or something's right! It's like that writer guy said, 'The lady doth protest too much.'"

"Which writer guy? Shakespeare?"

"Yeah, you say that when someone is trying to cover up a lie, like, 'He looks just like my old senpai!' Especially when your senpai looks like a dozen different men. Or the other old lie, 'We're just friends.'"

"Hey! So, you know then?" Makoto was blushing.

Mina nodded, taking another bite of the cupcake.

A look of worry crept across Mako's face. "Do the others know? Does... Does Ami know?" She didn't sound like herself. Everything she was trying to say was true, but she had never said the words out loud before.

She could hear her doubt, and heard her own voice start to crack. She hoped it just sounded like her throat was dry, and not like she was about to start crying.

"Well, Rei sort of knows, but I think I may have been the one to put it in her head. Usagi believes that you're STILL pining away for your lost love from your old school. And, well, Ami – I don't think she has a clue. I've known for a long time though."

Mako was surprised by her friend's intuition. She laughed it off. "And I thought Rei was supposed to be the psychic one."

Mina sighed, exasperated. "Sometimes, I wonder. I mean, how oblivious can she be? She makes me so mad! There's only so many hints I can drop before I take it personally, you know?"

Makoto had always had a hunch, and now she could finally really ask since no one else was around. "Ha! You like her? I wasn't sure what was happening there! But then, with Galaxia and finals, I forgot to ask. Then sometimes it seemed like everything was back to normal between the two of you."

"It sucks to be the goddess of love or whatever. It's like, I can always tell when someone likes someone else but I never know what to do about my own love life! Like, last week, I was at the temple. She was doing her homework and I was laying on her bed, practically throwing myself at her, and she wouldn't even look up. As if some algebra book is cuter than I am!"

Mako finished her tea and put the cup in the sink, rinsing it under the tap. "Still listening!" she said over the loud running water. She grinned. She lived for this kind of gossip.

"So, I start reading the horoscopes. Like, 'Hey Rei, it says, love might be closer than you know, what do you think? Do you like anybody? Hey Rei, it says that Aries is usually ruled by Mars but sometimes it's Venus... Hey Rei, I'm no Virgo but I still have the box it came in ahahaha!' And she never even looked up!" Minako ranted.

Mako laughed. "Oh god you didn't! Heh. T-That joke doesn't even really make sense does it?"

"No, I know... but it still sounds kinda dirty! And she didn't even react! So, like a minute later she finally looks up and tells me she doesn't even believe in the zodiac! So, I'm like, 'Pssh! Says the shrine maiden in a catholic school girl uniform reincarnated from a kingdom in outer space... As if, right?"

"Yeah, after what we've seen, a newspaper giving us a little weekly insight would probably be the sanest thing I've ever heard!" Makoto chuckled. "And, Rei is so bull-headed, I would've pegged her as a Taurus, but I'm sure she likes you."

"I dunno," Mina mumbled, looking away.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

Mina perked up and mimed zipping her lips.

"Rei says she doesn't like video games, but really it's because she's way too hot-headed, and with her bad temper it makes her too high strung to even get past the GAME OVER screen. It's like, the point of games is that they're fun! Put in another token and see if you can get further..."

"Yeah, I know that. What does it have to do with me?"

"Before we met you, when you weren't Sailor Venus yet, just good ol' Sailor V – she would basically drool over the pixel version of you. She even had a couple posters. And once you started coming to the shrine for meetings, she moved all of her manga to Usagi's so you wouldn't think she was, like, obsessed. I think it was a lot for her to meet her idol. Plus, going to an all girl school with crazy nuns, she's probably afraid to think about things like that."

Mina was blushing hard. She didn't have to ask, 'like what?' She knew. Minako smiled. "She really liked Sailor V, huh? I wonder if she ever..." She shook the filthy thoughts from her head.

"Plus, every time she tries to talk to you alone, Artemis really gets in the way. Or there's a youma. Actually, now that I think about it, you're probably why she sneaks over to our school so much, because I know she doesn't go there to see me or Ami," Makoto finished.

"Right, Ami..." Minako suddenly remembered her duties as the love senshi. "Why haven't you talked to Ami? You guys would be totally cute together."

"Dunno. Guess I'm just shy." She shrugged.

"You, shy? The girl who invited herself to Motoki's to teach him how to cook? The girl who rode off down the freeway in a convertible with Haruka after only knowing her a couple hours? You're shy? Or are you just scared?"

Makoto grit her teeth. She didn't like to be reminded of her vulnerabilities. "So what if I am?"

"You, the big, angry giant, scared of sweet, tiny Ami? What's she gonna do?"

"Uh! Say no? Break my heart? Stop talking to me? Make it so both school and Rei's become impossible for me, so then I have to move, and then I'll have nobody, all over again? And that's the Sailor business aside! I don't want to be the reason Earth is enslaved!" She sounded like she was beginning to hyperventilate.

She had obviously been dwelling on the worst case scenario for a while. Mina softened.  "Okay, yeah, okay. You're right, that does sound like something to be afraid of, but it just wouldn't happen! You wouldn't be alone. I swear that Rei and I wouldn't go anywhere. Usagi would probably say something to embarrass herself, but she would support you, and Ami would still be your friend. She would get over it. I promise, even if she was freaked out a little at first, none of that other stuff would happen!"

"I just don't know if she even likes girls. I don't even really know if I really like girls? Maybe I just like Ami, I think? Like, does she seem gay to you? I mean, she doesn't really gossip the way the rest of us do, so it's hard to tell, 'cause she's never talked about liking anyone, guy or girl. She's really closed off about that kind of thing, even with me. She denies it now, but I think she kind of liked that Ryo Uwara, but she said nothing was going to come of it. So they just talk sometimes but nothing else. I don't know if I should tell her."

"Well, 'To thine own self be true,’ right?"

"What's with you and all the Shakespeare tonight?”

"Who?"

"Minako, c'mon. Look, you usually screw up sayings, but when it's just us, you know exactly what you're talking about."

"I guess I kind of got into his plays when I lived in England. One time, I went to Stratford for a few weeks with some friends. That's like, where he used to live, by a castle on a river. It just kinda made me feel things."

Mina almost never talked about her time in England.

"So then, do you just play dumb or something? Is it to make Usagi feel better?"

"Well, truthfully? It's Rei. Yeah, sometimes I say some stupid shit by accident, but I know I have a pretty good idea of what I'm saying most of the time. Sometimes she gets so totally frazzled trying to stop herself from telling me what a ditz I am, and really, as cute as she is when she's angry, she's so super gorgeous when she smiles." She sighed, starry-eyed.

"Yeah?"

"She's just so damn serious all the time, and I feel so special when I'm the one who makes her laugh. And to be perfectly honest, sometimes I'm a little jealous of how much more time she's spent with Usagi. I mean, I know she's the princess, but I wish she would look at me like that, even once. Besides, even when she fights with her, there's a ton of good emotions there, too. She's so protective of her. I guess sometimes I want to know what it feels like to have what they have."

"Ha! So, that's why you asked if there was a poem called Nevermore by Edgar Allen Crow? You just were trying to make her laugh? Ami nearly had a stroke."

"But it is about birds isn't it? I just thought with her having a pair of ravens, such nice black hair, her secret goth phase, and everything that it would have done more than just make her roll her eyes at me. Besides, I shouldn't say, but you just know Raven would totally be her stripper name, or pen name or whatever."

Makoto pretended like she hadn't just heard Rei and stripper in the same sentence, but that'd be one surefire way to get the Senator to resign.

"Hm, well I think maybe Rei might've liked Usagi a little before you came along, but maybe Usagi just reminded her of Sailor V or something." Mako winked, made a peace sign with her fingers, mimicking Mina's trademark V for Victory.

Mina smiled as Mako continued. "I think Rei is just kinda partial to blondes. There was even a girl at her school she talked to a lot. She was blonde too. Besides, she's never been as annoyed with you as she is with Usagi, even though now that I know Usagi makes mistakes by accident and you just try to bait her... You don't get under her skin the same way. She's, like, waaay more patient with you. She knows Usagi is the princess and it's our sworn duty is to protect her, but I think she like really tries with you."

"Yeah?"

They sat quietly for a few seconds. It felt good to finally talk about their crushes but they were still no closer to dating Ami or Rei.

"Do you think it was this hard for Haruka and Michiru to hook up?"

"I dunno. I feel like they were always meant to be together, like they would've been together during the Silver Millennium, and are together now, and will still be together in the future in Crystal Tokyo, and probably even whatever's after that. They'll always be able to find each other. Haruka probably gives her some cheesy line about knowing her perfect soulmate existed, after hearing it whispered on the wind."

"You really think so? Sometimes, I feel like I'm meant to be with Ami, not just because I want to be, but I have these, uh, dreams about her."

"Whoa there, Sparky! Isn't that a little T.M.I?" Mina grinned.

"No!" Mako protested. "I mean, I don't know if they're dreams or memories or, like, premonitions or what, but it was so real. It's not the same kind of memories as when I have nightmares about the crash or dreams that my parents are back and we're in our old house, but I'm the age I am now. I always know right away what happened, even before I open my eyes and know I'm by myself in my apartment." She choked up. "I always know they're still dead and I'm still alone. No matter how much I wish it weren't true. But with the other dreams, I'm in a daze the whole day, thinking about Ami, and trying to figure out what it all means – And she forgets my birthday!"

Mina wondered if Ami ever even knew when Mako's birthday was, but she knew better than to argue, since that it was obviously beside the point. Ami had looked up different personal files about the girls, so she might have come across that information at some point, but decided to keep it quiet to not give herself away. Anything was possible.

"You should probably talk to her. Maybe she's had the same dreams? She should at least know for sure you don't have a phone now. I know you don't like to announce things like that, but she probably just doesn't know that, or that it was your birthday. She missed it but maybe she could make it up to you?" She smirked.

Mako acted like she hadn't just heard that suggestive tone. She got up to put the other mug in the sink, tossing the paper cupcake wrappers into the small metal garbage bin in the corner.

"It's getting pretty late." As she looked out the window, she noticed that the snow was falling much harder now. "Hm. You should probably just stay over. We have a meeting at the temple tomorrow. If you want, I could make you and Rei up  a nice bento each. You can go over early and surprise her, like you did with the cupcakes tonight. Just go over to the temple and have lunch; with this weather they won’t be getting a lot of tourists."

Minako bit her lip, wondering whether that would be a good idea or not.

"C'mon, Yuuichirou could probably help her grandpa with chores until the rest of us get there. I just think the sailor of love and the sailor of passion could find a lot to talk about." Mako sported a cheshire grin, which made Minako giggle. Makoto was such a romantic at heart and nothing would've made her happier than her friends realizing they were perfect for each other.

"That'd be awesome. If I chicken out, I could ask her about you and Ami? I mean, if she has seen anything in the sacred flame or had any dreams herself?"

"No," Makoto stopped her. "If it's okay, I don't really want to tell anyone else about the dreams because its mostly just quick flashes about fighting in different uniforms,or waking up beside a half naked Mercury on the Moon. And I know Luna and Artemis would want to make a huge discussion of it. I couldn't just ask, 'Were we as close then as we are now?' They'd want every detail. I'd just really hate Ami to find out this way."

"That's true. I mean I know you weren't really, really Princess Jupiter, but Ami still might want privacy where Princess Mercury's concerned."

"Uh huh... Or worse, if the cats disapproved? Or called this an unnecessary distraction? Or even forbid us from talking about it. That'd be too much. And the only detail is waking up time and time again in a huge bed other than my own, next to her, or kissing her at a party. A masquerade ball – but we all know what happened that night... So, maybe we should just leave well enough alone. Okay, Mina? Please?"

Minako remembered the first time she connected Sailor V's red mask with the grand balls of the Silver Millennium. It made perfect sense – Tuxedo Kamen had one. So had Phantom Ace. She felt sick to her stomach. She thought about the other Edgar Allen Poe story she'd stumbled upon 'Masque Of The Red Death.'

It was too close to home, or what had once been home at any rate. A young royal knows that everything is crumbling around them, so they throw a party at the palace. The guest's rooms are all colour-coded. She herself had spent many nights in a red room with those floor to ceiling scarlet velvet curtains. They lived like nothing was wrong until intruders showed up. "And the life of the ebony clock went out with that of the last of the gay. And the flames of the tripods expired. And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all." She had found herself nearly tearing up in English class and hadn't known what to tell her peers, other than, "It... It just sounds like such a terrible way to die."

"I know what you mean," she said. "I was the first senshi to awaken so I've been having these dreams the longest, and Artemis still asks too many questions if I bring it up, and well, you're right. Luna can get pretty judgemental." Mina then did her impression of Luna. "Now, Jupiter, why is it that you feel you need to sleep instead of training? Why don't you dream about something useful like how to defeat youma?" She paused to pretend to lick her paw and then wash the invisible ear on top of her head.

Mako laughed, and did her best impression of the white cat, "You need to be more responsible. Now here, help me break into the arcade."

"We'd better get some sleep before the communicators wake us up." Mina looked across the table at the shabby bed, remembering her present. She shot up, and darted toward the door, coming back with a large shopping bag.

"What's all this?" Mako asked, raising an eyebrow. "You plannin' on moving in?"

Mina opened the bag to reveal a beautiful green comforter with lace trim and new forest green sheets with a pattern of tiny little leaves in a lighter shade of green.

"You didn't even know it was my birthday though!" She said in shock.

Mina acted all flustered, knowing her friend wouldn't take charity. "No, but, see, so you know how it's winter? And it's been getting colder? I thought to myself Mina, you should treat yourself to a brand new, nice, warm blanket! But, wouldn't you know, I'm such a total ditz. I bought bedding for a double bed, but I have a queen! And then I lost the receipt! I'm just so clueless sometimes, but I thought, know who would probably like these? My good friend Mako-chan!" She smiled slyly, hoping Mako would accept the gift. She worried that she may have laid that story on a little thick.

If Rei was here, she would've told her to leave well enough alone, that she didn't need to be so meddling and that she didn't have to play interior designer every time she walked into a room that she didn't like, but Mina was the goddess of love AND beauty after all. She always worried that people must've thought she was shallow, just because she didn't think beauty ended with her own looks, but making other things beautiful as well. Besides, Mako had done so much for them and she just wanted her to have something nice, something that was all hers.

"Thank you! Thank you so much! These are really, really nice, they must've cost a fortune!" Makoto squeezed the plush material. It definitely felt like something that would help keep her toasty warm. She thought for a split second, 'Isn't Mina's bedroom is orange or yellow?' and tried to picture the room. Maybe there was a bit of red too, but not green. She pushed that idea away. She was grateful for the birthday present that her friend had obviously picked out for her. Minako had clearly thought up a story like that to spare her pride. She was pretty lucky sometimes.

They tucked the corners of the fitted sheet under the mattress, put on new pillow cases, fluffed, ruffled and spread out the comforter. Mina's intuition was dead on. Like magic, the whole room instantly looked so much nicer. They got ready to go to sleep in harmony.

"G'night, Mako," Mina murmured. "Happy Birthday."

---

Later, Makoto lay there wide awake, as the blonde snored lightly, curled up against a pillow. Part of her wished she hadn't revealed as much to Mina as she had. Once things were out there, there'd be no putting them back. She knew she could trust her friend, even if she had a tendancy to be a total gossip. She at least had enough tact that she would never tell the person that it was about, and it would never leave their circle.

The worst case scenario was usually that Mina would tell Rei or Rei would tell Mina, that was a given. Haruka and Michiru already would know, and you couldn't tell one without the other. Mamoru was intuitive but tried not to meddle in their affairs – he had long outgrown their teenage drama. Usagi was usually kept in the dark about any of the interplanetary feuding. They had always agreed that they would keep up appearances for her, and fight on their own time.

Even if it had been a fluke Makoto was grateful that someone had kind of remembered her birthday, and had cared enough to see if she was alright. She appreciated the company and her friend's concern. She had liked her cake and was completely in love her new blankets.

She was also grateful because she'd be able to keep her anger in check now. She knew that if she had kept all this in for much longer, then the next person to look at her funny would probably have got their arm broken.

She felt a twinge of embarrassment. Was her story about her old senpai really so transparent? She wasn't being dishonest per se, but it must've looked strange to describe someone who was a tall, short, dark, fair, brainy, jock who always wore hats except when he didn't. In truth, there had actually been a couple guys.

Life in her old towns had been very hard, and she hated that, no matter where she went, her past preceded her. There were always rumours, lies and half truths. Everyone always asked if she'd really been kicked out for fighting. She did get into a lot of fights, but she never started them. It was mostly guys who would make a pass at her, then, when she'd ignore them, turn around and call her a dyke all in the same breath.

She knew she wasn't seen as feminine as other girls. Her height made things difficult. It was harder to find pretty clothes in her size, so she'd tend to wear something plainer if it fit better. She also didn't have a lot of money to keep up with the more current trendy brand name fashions.

She was always kind of a tomboy, even back when her mom and dad were alive. Her parents had been proud of her – she had been such a happy child. They encouraged her to climb trees, and if she fell and skinned her knees, to just get up and try again, to be bright and fearless. But the living at first at an orphanage, then group homes, and then on the streets had nearly beaten all that brightness out of her. Life had forced her to be tough, and even when she really tried to be girly, everyone still had something negative to say to her.

It didn't matter that she was getting one of the best marks in her home-ec class, it was the marks she was getting in gym that caught everyone's attention. There were just a lot of little things. Whenever she'd stand up for herself to a boy, they'd say she must be a real man-hater. Pretty soon the whole school thought she was gay.

The guys were so horrible with comments about "knowing they'd be able to fix her." The girls, who were already afraid of her, stopped talking to her altogether. Mako had been really alone then and had had such dark thoughts. She didn't know if she really wanted to die, but for however brief a moment suicide had crossed her mind.

She had truly had no one in the world that she could talk to. She was so overwhelmed, all she really wanted was to find a way to make the rumours stop. She could hear the echoes of their malicious laughter and had their disgusted faces, hateful glares and sneers permanently etched into her mind.

So Mako had slept with a boy, her old senpai. He was one of the nicer guys. He was good looking. She knew that she wasn't really in love with him, but he had seemed decent enough. She hoped that if she really forced it, maybe he'd want to actually date her.

She had needed to feel needed. She was cripplingly aware of how lonely she was and didn't know if she was defective. She had to find answers. She decided that she didn't really mind being used – it was still attention and it felt good to be noticed.

She understood that gossip travelled fast. She figured on some level, being called a slut was better than being called a dyke. The names didn't hurt so much at first. Once there had been things that were carved so deeply into her locker, taking so many layers of old paint and metal with them, that even when the janitor painted over it, it could all still be read clearly. There were things written in the locker room showers.

It had been just getting to be too much and every day was getting harder. She hadn't been sitting alone in the lunchroom anymore, but knew that people just wanted to satisfy their own warped curiosity, and only talked to her to find out if the rumours were true.

It was only once the rumours got to Kioshi Hakoda, a quiet boy in her history class, who had asked her out, that she began to regret her actions. She realized too late that he had really cared for her, but once he heard the talk, he'd broken up with her in a public spectacle during lunch in the busy cafeteria.

She had made too big a mess of things, she decided, and just left, skipping town. The next school would've probably been much the same if she hadn't had an old sempai to talk about. She knew she liked some guys, at least a little. As long as she was talking about boys, no one would think anything else. It got easier to pretend that she cared, or easier to pretend she didn't care. She wasn't even sure which was true anymore.

She learned it wasn't as difficult to get guys to leave her alone if she mentioned another guy than if she just politely declined. She still didn't have any friends but at least now she could fall asleep without crying only to wake up to a tear soaked pillow. She had time to figure out what she wanted. She had been able to breathe again.

She had made one friend, Tomoko Takase, a quiet, intelligent, blue haired girl, who wrote fantasy stories. It was nice to have someone who wasn't afraid of her, who hadn't heard, or didn't care about the rumours. Makoto had found herself drawn to her, eager to win her shy smiles. In retrospect, she could admit it had been a crush.

When she made the realization that she might actually like girls, she knew it must sound strange, but she thought it was exactly like running full speed into a patio door, like everyone watching could tell what was going to happen except her – she was already too close to see it, it was already too late – especially since it felt like she had been hearing it her whole life. Like everyone had been saying, "Oh that Makoto, she's the type to run into glass," "Know who I hear runs into doors? That tall girl," "I bet Kino walks into stuff like that all the time." And she hadn't, they had no reason to think that about her. She had done nothing wrong, and just in case she had, she now did her best to be more careful, almost paranoid, trying to overcompensate to prove she wasn't who they thought she was. It was like when someone is afraid they're going to trip, so they're constantly watching their feet and then BAM! They still fall of course. They were always going to fall, but now it's almost in slow motion, adding insult to injury.

The truth had knocked her right flat on her ass. They were right. They had always been right. Everything hurt for a moment, but she was more shocked than in pain. She felt betrayed, like her very senses had lied to her. Everything she knew had been wrong. She was embarrassed that she had missed something about herself that was such a surprise to her but that must be so glaringly obvious to everyone else. It made her tread even more lightly, in case there were any more things she had to question and even more things she couldn't trust herself with knowing for sure. Unable to face the people she knew, especially Tomoko, she had moved schools yet again.

Mako had spent a lot of time worrying about girls. She didn't want to look like she was giving up on men. Maybe she still liked boys. It was all very confusing. Sometimes she'd talk herself out of it, wondering even if she did like a girl, what kind of future could they have? She'd grown up without a family, would she grow old without one, too?

She sometimes mourned the idea of a nice little house, beautiful garden, maybe a baby or two, and of course, a smart, funny, gorgeous husband who loved her unconditionally and always let her be herself, someone who could make her feel delicate and cared for. Why couldn't she have that? Had she really done something so wrong to doom herself to this fate of unending loneliness? Even when she'd try to change it to a smart, funny gorgeous wife who loved her unconditionally, it still never lined up quite right.

She couldn't always remember as much as she'd like about her parents. What she did remember was fading as she got older, but she knew they would read her fairy tales before bed, and not even one of those colourful pages full of pretty pictures of women in beautiful gowns or handsome princes with swords had two princesses kiss at the end. Girls didn't just run away together and get married, did they?

In each new place, Makoto felt like people judged her too quickly. They'd dismiss her as either some dumb jock or just another ignorant delinquent. She didn't think that she was really a complete idiot, though she did miss a lot of school. She would get suspended for fighting, and got sick a lot from being so cold, hungry and over-tired. Between the fighting and bullying, teachers thought she was the problem, that she must like looking for trouble. They said she must be doing something to instigate the arguments that escalated so quickly into violence, and whenever she needed a fresh start, she would leave again.

Every new school she'd go to would be just ahead of where she left off, the teacher would always start off nice enough, "I'm sure you covered all of this at your old school." She'd smile, nod, and act like she would catch up. "Well, I'm always here to help." But whenever she'd try to track a teacher down with a question, they'd be too busy, or assign a tutor who wouldn't show up because of her reputation.

A few times, her peer tutors had told her she was an idiot and would never be able to learn it in time, and one purposely had her work on the wrong worksheet and denied it to the teacher. After all, coming from a straight A student who was volunteering to help out in their spare time, who were teachers more likely they believe?

With her grades suffering, there would be more fights, suspensions, and expulsions. She couldn't always leave schools and find schools so easily. Sometimes to qualify, she'd have to move to be in the acceptable school district, and that meant finding first and last month's rent. So she was held back a year, not because of grades alone, but for poor attendance.

The others didn't know she was older, but Usagi would always tease her and say being born at the end of the year made her the baby of the group, or that she was too tall to really be their age.

Really, Mako had been tall for a woman of any age, but it still rubbed her wrong. Mostly because it was another way she had failed, something else she had to lie about, another thing she could slip up about.

She hated to be dishonest, especially because she desperately wanted to be close with the other senshi. She wanted the other scouts to be able to trust her, but her past always screwed everything up. She hoped one day she wouldn't have anything to hide, no more secrets, but if you took all that away, what would she even be left with? Who would she even be?

She worried that she was destined to always run away. She hated feeling so weak, and acting like such a coward. It felt like she was always at the breaking point, like any little thing would set her off.

It seemed so strange to her looking back, that the same day she met Usagi her life had changed forever. That same day, she had first been properly introduced to Ami. She had seen her around before and had felt drawn to her, but they had never really spoken to one another. The blue haired girl was rather meek, but unlike the other girls she'd met that day, she hadn't been afraid of  the taller girl. It was only a couple hours later that they found out Makoto was Sailor Jupiter, and it was Sailor Mercury who told her that she was the also senshi of courage.

She didn't feel very brave, and she'd soon come to believe that Ami was really the courageous one. Ami was brave in subtle ways that not everyone picked up on. Like that Rendez Vous of Destiny dance – she had been so bold at that dance. Mako still thought about it a lot. She had been in awe of the brave girl asking her to dance. Ami deserved so much more credit.

It had taken her such a long time to realize just how devastated Ami must've been when Mako waited all night in the rain for Tiger’s Eye instead. She had been so stupid. Makoto had just been another conquest. It had been Ami who had worried about her, and got the other girls to come keep her company and bring her an umbrella and a towel.

Mako had decided that she needed a good relationship, she needed to prove she was normal. She was finally at a point where she was starting to believe she wasn't just trash, something no one wanted, or that they would change their mind about her and just throw her away. She had finally started to believed she was deserving and worthy of respect and affection. She had friends now. She had a little home. There were no more envelopes with scary, glaring, red letters that said final notice, no late cheques or unpaid bills in her mailbox.

She had been doing a little better in school, too, even if her teachers were still on her case. She had thought it was about time for someone to fall in love with her. She wanted to do it properly that time, not just find someone who took pity on her, or who could get what they wanted and leave, but someone who truly loved her. She had had such high hopes for the dance. Motoki Furuhata had told her people found their soulmates there, and she believed him. She had only wanted to feel normal.

When Tiger's Eye had stood her up, Ami had still asked her to dance, and then later came out in the rain, where they'd fallen asleep together. Later, Mina had reminded them of the name, hinting that their's had been the rendez-vous in question. She'd also convinced Rei to dance with her. After all, maybe there was truth in what Motoki had told them.

---

Minako woke up to the clang of pots and pans. Makoto wasn't being particularly loud, but the sound carried in the tiny apartment. Minako decided that no matter what time it was, it was still too early to get up, and tried to go back to sleep. She would've drifted off again, but the aroma of something cooking snapped her out of it. Makoto was making her special french toast. The whole apartment smelled like cinnamon.

Mako returned to the bed with two plates of food, and saw Minako looked around as her eyes adjusted to the room. There was no television. There were books and some old video cassettes on a shelf but nothing to watch them on. Some things had been damaged in Makoto's travels, lost or stolen by the movers. Other things had been sold during particularly hard times, but she liked what she did have left, especially the framed photo of her and her parents that hung on the wall.

Mako caught Minako focusing on one especially bare corner. Makoto sheepishly explained that it was a meditation corner.

A few months before she had gone to Rei, asking for some advice about her anger. She had been worried that if she didn't step back and try to calm herself down, her rage issues would get out of control again. She knew that it would only take one incident for people to start up the stories about how unstable she was. Things had been piling up for her, and there hadn't been as many youma, so sometimes there was no safe outlet to channel her fury. It wasn't like she could be honest with a professional, so psychiatry was out.

She used to go to the gym. At first it was an excuse to run into Ami at the pool. Sometimes she'd go to the ice rink, but the skate rental was really expensive. She would have been just as far ahead to actually buy a pair of skates, but there was never enough extra money. She liked to take the karate classes, until they raised the price and she couldn't afford to extend her membership. She got a second job, and then, when she would've been able to pay the higher fees, she got more hours at her other job and didn't have the time anymore. Things just happened like that sometimes.

She'd been busy with work and school. It wasn't always trying to balance the actual work that was hard, but rather the fear of coming home to another past-due bill that discouraged her from quitting. The store patrons would make remarks like, "How are you ever going to make something of yourself, if you're here instead of studying?" or "How are you going to find a husband if you're hiding in a flower shop? The fellas who come in here already have sweethearts!" She'd laugh it off, knowing if she slipped up that it would probably cost her her job.

Then, in the morning, the teachers would say, "Maybe if you didn't stay out all night, you'd find time to finish your assignments. What would your parents think?" And time and time again she would have to swallow down her anger, so afraid it would eventually consume her. She respected her elders, but she wished that even some of the time they would respect her as well. She was doing the best she could. It hurt, especially when this was the same idiot teacher that had once seen them coming out of The Crown and had told Usagi that she was a disgrace and didn't deserve to play arcade games, because she was nothing like Sailor V. That real heroes cared about their futures. Makoto had had to leave or she would have done something she'd regret.  

Mako had been walking around just seething with anger, carrying the storm with her wherever she'd go, fists clenched tightly. She felt like she was becoming unapproachable again, and maybe she liked it like that just a little bit, but she was part of a team now, one that was almost like a family. She finally had people who cared about her, and she couldn't do the lone wolf thing anymore and still expect her friendships to survive.

She'd known she had to talk to someone, and to her surprise that someone was Rei. All the scouts had their own unique areas of expertise. Whether or not Rei would ever admit it, they had a lot in common.

She'd climbed the many stairs of the shrine and made small talk with Rei's Grandpa. The bald old man had seemed a little disappointed that she hadn't brought any of her fabulous cooking with her, but understood this was a more serious type of visit. He'd joked that he hoped that Rei wasn't in any kind of trouble with her because Kino could really pack a wallop! POW!

She tried to laugh, but he that raw truth hit a little too close to the bone. He told Makoto she could wait inside of the temple for Rei to get home from her classes, but Makoto just thanked him, instead moving to sit under a beautiful cherry tree. Pink petals fell from the blossoms in the light breeze, and even just connecting with nature for those few minutes seemed to help. Even the air seemed sweeter. She tried to convince herself one last time that she was doing the right thing coming there.

Rei came up the path and found her there, studying her with dark, serious eyes. "Mako-chan, I was hoping you'd see me today. Sit down, tell me everything."

"I thought that..."

"None of that! First of all, you know that's not even how it works! So I don't want to hear –" she mimicked her friend's gravelly voice, "I thought you were psychic. So why did you have to hope you'd see me, didn't you already know? Why do you need me to tell you anything, shouldn't you already know?'" Rei softened, "'I do already know that you're feeling out of control, but I need to hear it from you."

Makoto began to wonder if she had made a mistake, but she thought about it for a second, 'If I were to talk to Usagi about it, she'd just tell me what I needed to hear, that I was just over-reacting and couldn't possibly be as angry as I said I was. I'd try to believe it for a little while, but I always tried to keep that side of myself from the princess.'

The shrine maiden wasn't one to sugar coat things. While Makoto was friends with all the senshi, she felt like Rei sometimes still kept her distance. She lowered her gaze and timidly pleaded, at the end of her rope, "Please, Rei? I can't handle things on my own anymore."

Rei started by kept asking Makoto to come up with a list of things that made her angry,  so that she could let go of these smaller things one by one. "See," she said, "Most of these things are just yesterday's problem for yesterday's Makoto."

Rei's advice had been to encourage her to meditate like the bald monk Kakusui, Makoto had once stayed with.

"There is no path that lets me live my life other than this path. Therefore I walk this path."

She had written it down when she had stayed in the mountains for training. She had journaled anything she thought was important while she was away. Even though she had gone when her confidence had been almost shattered, after a few days, she had actually been happy to be around so many different kinds of plants, and she had had a list of things to look up when she went home.

But that day, even a peaceful quote had made her frustrated. "I don't want to be on this stupid path, that's the whole damn point."

She'd been thinking about going back to the mountains. Even if she didn't need to train with him, it would be nice to visit, or to at least write him a letter, but she never knew when she was burdening people. She remembered his other advice. "People cannot live alone, don't force yourself." She had been going at it alone for so long that it was all she knew anymore. She was trying though.

Makoto knew that she and Rei were friends, and Rei cared about her and wanted to help, but she was just a Miko, not really a priestess yet. She'd given Mako a space to vent, really get some things out into the open. Makoto had mostly just needed a good ear and a safe place.

Makoto felt better, a mix of relieved and embarrassed at her confessions. Admitting everything from being aggravated by the video games she normally enjoyed, to being frustrated that she was working two jobs, but still never had any money, to having to cut her own hair. She was even bothered by a bird outside her window which had nearly pushed her to the brink.

"I swear to god Rei, I was going to punch that sparrow in the face."

Rei laughed and told her with a wink, that just like any battle, she should clear her mind before going against the video game bosses or any other obstacle, that she couldn't control how yesterday's Makoto had handled a bird outside of her window, but that that had been yesterday's bird, too, and that tomorrow's Makoto would know what to do.

"And as for the haircut, just never let Mina find out. She says she can cut hair, but don't to listen to her." Rei touched the back of her neck, where if it hadn't been for her senshi healing, there might have been a scar.  

Rei had named some general ways to deal with emotions: "Write things down, talk to people, meditate, exercise, destroy a youma, have sex..."

Makoto raised an eyebrow. "W-What was the last thing?"

"Destroy a youma?"

"No, no, after that..."

"Spiritual texts?"

'Sex...texts...texts...sex... Yeah they do sound pretty alike, maybe I just didn't hear her?'

Rei laughed. "No, I'm messing with you. I totally said sex. You were being so serious, I couldn't help myself."

Mako shook her head. "Y'know, somewhere Mina-chan is just bursting with pride, and has no idea why."

"Mako, I'm not just being your friendly neighbourhood shrine maiden talking to some lost soul. This is as friends, okay? You did really good today. I probably would've just left if I were you. I would've wanted to punch me in the face, but I hope it helps. I do think you're still holding back a little about some things, but that might just be the way you are."

The truth was Rei she couldn't judge her friend on this, when she was the exact same way. Makoto knew that Rei had really felt her pain, that some of it was so close to her own. She saw her open her mouth to speak, probably to tell her that she still missed her mother, too, but no words came out.

Finally, she'd sent her off with a nice box of herbal tea and some candles from the shrine's gift shop. Grandpa's idea. It couldn't hurt. As Makoto headed on her way, Rei had yelled out the front door, "Oh! And go talk to Ami, she's been thinking about you."

---

"So, that's corner I set up to meditate like Rei suggested," Mako concluded.

Mina stifled back laughter, "Rei still flies off the handle more than anyone! She's the last person who should give anyone advice! But seriously, between the herbal tea and sitting quietly in the corner, if you really feel better, then I'm happy Rei could help."

"So far, it hasn't worked very well." Mako sighed. She had started to meditate, seen the apartment from a different angle and spent the evening rearranging furniture, much to the displeasure of her sleeping neighbours. Other attempts had just made her tired. It did a help with clearing her mind before bed. She was having fewer nightmares, but she still wasn't sleeping properly, and was honestly still pretty angry.

"I've thought about talking to Ami-chan," she admitted to Mina. Spending time with Ami always made Makoto feel better. "But I don't want to make anyone worry about me." She really didn't want the quiet girl to think poorly of her. "Besides, Ami's always so even-tempered and logical. What if she just thinks I'm some sort of primitive brute?"

Author's note: Finally... I started writing this in 2014. I'm so glad to finally let it see the light of day. Did you catch the little nods to Frozen, Supernatural and Spiderman? Also is it just me or did the poster for the dance really 'mirror' Haruka and Michiru?

Next up: More trauma for poor Mako-chan. Will Ami 'freeze' up while facing her worst nightmare? Domestic outer senshi, homo sweet homo. A rather 'heated' moment between Rei and Mina. Stay tuned.

In the name of the moon, I will PUNish you.