#these tags were all over the place i apologize. i can't really remember the initial point of this post

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Unfortunately sometimes I know what will fix me and then I just don't do it. Anyway

[cultivating-wildflowers]

hi there !! i was over here because you had reblogged a really pretty photograph a while ago and i wanted to see what other lovely posts you might've found in the corners of tumblr.

i looked at your account and noticed, oh, pro-life! i was a bit wary at first because many people i've seen as pro-life are misogynistic sexist idiots who say it's a woman's fault if she's raped, even if the 'woman' in question is a fourteen year old girl. i hope you forgive my initial scepticism.

however, i read your post on the pro-life argument with the way you see it (it may have been a reblog of someone else? i can't quite remember) and i have some questions. i myself am pro-abortion, but with certain restrictions (mainly the current law in many places of you can't abort the child a month before birth because it's a human, and that aborting a child for its disabilities isn't ethical in the slightest).

what about when a twelve year old child is raped? is she meant to carry the strain of a child, scorn from parents, lack of support, blame, maybe have permanent harm or disabilities from childbirth? i have an old friend who got her menstrual cycle at eight years old. if she were raped, would she need to carry the child? in my worldview, no. a child gets raped and then the next day the "morning after" pill is administered so an elementary schooler (or middle, or even high schooler) does not have to suffer.

another question: sometimes, conception happens hours or even days after the actual ejaculation. would a "morning after" pill be outlawed? because there's no way to be sure if conception has actually happened, and if it hasn't, then taking a pill or some other action to prevent conception from happening in the first place isn't "bad".

and what about women whose children died in the womb? would anti-abortion laws still apply, would she charged with murder?

what about women who due to an illness or some other reason cannot have a child because they will die in the process, killing them and the child? would the pro-life worldview condemn both lives, or would they allow this person to take a pill and cut off the few cells that could not in any world be called a human?

if some vile person killed a woman who had conceived two days prior, would they be charged with double murder for that which is not yet a blastocyst (the zygote phase is four to five days after conception).

i'm very sorry if these questions seem accusatory or rude-- i'm genuinely trying to understand the other side, because i don't feel like i can actually justify abortion if i don't know how the "other" side would approach ethical questions. i put "other" in quotation marks because while we have two very much opposing sets of ideas on how abortion should be approached, above all we care for the welfare of people and want the best for everyone.

so sorry for putting this big chunk of text in your askbox, and feel free to ignore it, but you're one of the first genuinely nice people i've seen that is pro life who isn't trying to justify arguments with religion (because separation of church and state means no religion as sole justification for law, which is what many people i've seen try to do)

thank you!!

Hello! Thank you so much for your detailed questions! I'm happy to answer as best I can. I had thought this might take a while to answer, because I had to find a few resources I knew I had linked somewhere that helped me as I was sorting through the logistics of my own convictions surrounding being pro-life. Turns out this was how I'd spend my evening, lol.

I still have gaps and I'm always happy for civil discussion. (As you know, a lot of my thoughts are under my pro-life tag. Apologies in advance that several of my links just shoot back to posts I've reblogged, but they're more comprehensive than a single webpage. I can also direct you to a couple of tumblr folks I follow who have even more resources and cover different facets of the issue than I usually reblog or that I'm still investigating.)

As you might have guessed, this got long, so I'm tucking it under a read-more. But before I do, here is my most important resource: What actually happens during an abortion. I rarely say anything is so important that everyone needs to see it. This is one of those times.

i was over here because you had reblogged a really pretty photograph a while ago and i wanted to see what other lovely posts you might've found in the corners of tumblr.

The funny thing is that used to be 90% of my blog until like two years ago, and now here we are 😅 (I lost a lot of followers when I started actually using this like a blog. I also found a lot of great friends.)

i looked at your account and noticed, oh, pro-life! i was a bit wary at first because many people i've seen as pro-life are misogynistic sexist idiots who say it's a woman's fault if she's raped, even if the 'woman' in question is a fourteen year old girl. i hope you forgive my initial scepticism.

Yeah, can't say I'd care to associate with those people, either, and I'd love to challenge them on their own convictions (only, 1. I'm not really one for heated debates and 2. I'm pretty sure I, a single 20-something woman, would be immediately ignored, so why waste my time).

however, i read your post on the pro-life argument with the way you see it (it may have been a reblog of someone else? i can't quite remember) and i have some questions. i myself am pro-abortion, but with certain restrictions (mainly the current law in many places of you can't abort the child a month before birth because it's a human, and that aborting a child for its disabilities isn't ethical in the slightest).

While I was born and raised in a pro-life family, being pro-life as an adult is a conviction I claim and have searched out for myself. I know, and science affirms, that life begins at conception. (Yes, all of those frozen embryos stored at ivf clinics are unique and full human beings. I'll be so honest with you and say even I have to grapple with that and no, I haven't begun to grasp the implications.) Every single human being is deserving of dignity, from womb to tomb. It is never permissible to murder a human being for being inconvenient. (Canadian and British government healthcare systems, I'm looking at you. Also, Iceland, I see your claim that you've eradicated Down syndrome and I know you're a bunch of lying cowards.) It is never permissible to murder someone because they have the potential to be inconvenient. I could be hit by a car tomorrow and end up with brain damage. I could lose my job and plunge into horrible poverty. I could meet some random guy and end up in an abusive relationship. If it's not ok to kill me because of less-than-ideal circumstances, it is not ok to kill a child because they might be born disabled, or into a poor family, or into an abusive situation. We need to fix their circumstances, not kill them.

(Before I get much further, this post is a collection of a lot of my favorite resources on the impact abortion has on women. More facts and figures here. Unfortunately I cannot find the link to the study, but I have seen it cited often on here that a large majority of women who considered abortion but did not go through with it, within five years, are glad they didn't get an abortion. I believe the number is between 90 and 95% but again, can't find the link.)

For the last eight years, I've worked at an organization that provides care for individuals with disabilities, many of whom have the sort of disabilities that would make doctors suggest abortion. Not one of those human beings would be better off dead. The world is richer for them being in it, and I'm happy to know them. They deserve support and dignity, not death.

There is no magical point at which a preborn baby becomes human or becomes a person. They are human from the moment of conception. I have a friend who was born nearly two months prematurely; did she have to wait a month post-birth to be considered human?

There are also no non-person humans. Personhood is not merit-based. Again, if I end up with brain damage and have to rely on other people for the rest of my life, do I cease to be a person?

what about when a twelve year old child is raped? is she meant to carry the strain of a child, scorn from parents, lack of support, blame, maybe have permanent harm or disabilities from childbirth? i have an old friend who got her menstrual cycle at eight years old. if she were raped, would she need to carry the child? in my worldview, no. a child gets raped and then the next day the "morning after" pill is administered so an elementary schooler (or middle, or even high schooler) does not have to suffer.

It is a fact that abortion protects abusers. It is a fact that rapists and sex traffickers force women to have abortions to keep them in those horrible situations. Abortion is anti-woman, because it helps horrible men dodge all responsibility, and it prevents society at large from having to address the actual causes that often drive women to abortion.

Rape accounts for about 1% of all abortions. I'm not saying that makes it ok and I'm not trying to dismiss it, I'm just observing that it's nearly always treated as the main driver behind abortion when it is not. What it is is one of the most horrific things that can ever happen to a person, and the offender needs to be dealt with, with extreme prejudice. Killing a child helps no one. The mother deserves protection, she deserves support, and she deserves medical care. I don't know all the ins and outs of how best to handle this situation, but I believe the best case scenario is eventually a c-section. (A book I really appreciated that covered a situation like this is I Am the Exception by Anna Richey [video linked]). There are countless testimonies of women who were in this situation who chose to save their children and they are glad they did. They know the answer was not to kill children. There are countless testimonies of people who were conceived in rape who are glad their mothers chose to give them a chance at life. They know their lives have value and are worth living. Mother and child are both victims who deserve justice, not trauma heaped upon trauma.

(There's a whole discussion to be had here around child marriage and sexual abuse but unfortunately I don't have the material to even touch it. I can say making pedophilia a protected "identity" is so far off the mark that the radar can't even pick it up.)

(I will briefly sidebar to wave at the legislation being put into place to teach human development in schools via the Baby Olivia...project? [I forget what the whole initiative is called which is horrible because I've seen it around a lot lately.] I think that's actually pretty awesome. Kid-me would have been fascinated [and a bit grossed out because yeah, I was an awkward kid].)

another question: sometimes, conception happens hours or even days after the actual ejaculation. would a "morning after" pill be outlawed? because there's no way to be sure if conception has actually happened, and if it hasn't, then taking a pill or some other action to prevent conception from happening in the first place isn't "bad".

I have to disagree there. It's still bad. Especially because, in the overwhelming majority of cases, we're talking about sex between two consenting adults who are looking to disrupt a natural process and divorce it from all natural responsibility for the sake of convenience. If you don't want to get pregnant, don't have sex. If you don't want to have a kid with that person, don't have sex with them. Simple as. Biological children are not a human right, and neither is sex.

(If you poke around at enough of my blog you'll notice I'm straight-up against birth control. For one thing, it is extremely harmful to women; for another, it is a band-aid that has completely stalled the improvement of women's healthcare; for another, it is seriously damaging the average Western woman's understanding of her own body and biology; and there's the whole disrupting-a-natural-process bit. But I digress.)

and what about women whose children died in the womb? would anti-abortion laws still apply, would she charged with murder?

Reading any of the laws in question shows that ectopic pregnancies and miscarriages aren't at all included in those laws. Those are not abortion because the pregnancy is nonviable and it has become a medical situation. Abortion wouldn't even help those situations; if anything, it would only make everything worse, and risk the life of the mother. Abortion is not medical care. Ectopic pregnancies and miscarriages have to be treated medically. All of the cases I've seen where "a woman was charged with murder for miscarriage" end up being something else like "woman miscarried and tried flushing her baby down the toilet" (yeah that was an actual thing in the last month and she was charged with improper treatment of human remains which... = human dignity.)

what about women who due to an illness or some other reason cannot have a child because they will die in the process, killing them and the child? would the pro-life worldview condemn both lives, or would they allow this person to take a pill and cut off the few cells that could not in any world be called a human?

Abortion is not healthcare. If a woman is already at risk of complications, abortion will only make those complications worse. They will not help her. There is not a single situation where pregnancy is so dangerous that the only answer is abortion.

Those "few cells" are human. I'm also a clump of cells; I'm human. If I'm drowning (unlikely because I avoid swimming because I suck at it), is it ok for the lifeguard to hold my head underwater instead of making me calm down so they can tow me to shore?

Any reasonable human being who recognizes that the woman in question is carrying another human being, her child, would recognize that what they both need is medical care. The mother can be monitored, her condition treated as best as possible, and there's always the option to deliver early. Modern medicine allows us to support babies who are almost as early as 20 weeks premature! The answer is to take care of these people, not kill one because the other is in danger.

And in case anyone is wondering, this goes for babies who are "incompatible with life". 1. Doctors make mistakes and it's proven they often make mistakes where fetal development is concerned. (My sister got the scare of her life when a stupid tech told her that her third baby had "spots on her brain". I told my coworker, who said the same thing happened to her 15 years ago and one doctor bandied about the word "abortion" in front of her. Friends, the baby's brain was still developing. My sister's child is fine, and stupidly adorable to boot. Please.) 2. Even if that baby is "incompatible with life", the answer is not to kill them more quickly (and far, far, far more painfully). The answer is to treat them as best as medically possible, support their parents, and afford them the dignity deserving to every human being. Palliative care is a thing. For heaven's sake, let's use it more.

(My mother used to be a volunteer photographer for an organization where she went to hospitals and took pictures of babies who either had just passed or who didn't have long to live, to give their parents something to remember their children by. I also have so so many relatives and friends who have suffered miscarriages and stillbirths. I don't know that grief firsthand, but I know what it looks like, and I know that parents and siblings need support, not murder.)

(We also really need to stop treating all pregnancies like medical situations or a disease. They aren't. Pregnancy is natural. It is only when there are complications that it becomes a medical issue. I love modern medicine by and large. I love that it can help improve our lives. But sometimes doctors need to butt out and let women do what they were built to do.)

if some vile person killed a woman who had conceived two days prior, would they be charged with double murder for that which is not yet a blastocyst (the zygote phase is four to five days after conception).

I don't know all of the legalities of double homicides in the case of pregnancy. I'm fairly certain that if it is known that the woman is pregnant, regardless of whether or not that motivated the murder, then the charge is double homicide. I would assume if the pregnancy was unknown, it doesn't apply? (I watch too many murder mystery and police procedural shows to have any faith in how these things are determined.) Morally, two people have been killed regardless, but I have no idea on the legalities.

Also, note that zygote and blastocyst are stages of human development, same as embryo, fetus, newborn, infant, toddler, adolescent, and adult.

i'm very sorry if these questions seem accusatory or rude-- i'm genuinely trying to understand the other side, because i don't feel like i can actually justify abortion if i don't know how the "other" side would approach ethical questions. i put "other" in quotation marks because while we have two very much opposing sets of ideas on how abortion should be approached, above all we care for the welfare of people and want the best for everyone. so sorry for putting this big chunk of text in your askbox, and feel free to ignore it, but you're one of the first genuinely nice people i've seen that is pro life who isn't trying to justify arguments with religion (because separation of church and state means no religion as sole justification for law, which is what many people i've seen try to do)

I don't think any of this comes off as rude or argumentative in any way! You laid out every point very clearly and it's nice to be able to discuss it as clearly as I am able (which, admittedly, is sometimes as clear as milk) instead of feeling like I have to defend myself (usually in that case I just give up and delete the ask). Again, I'm happy to look into any of this further and to provide better resources if there's something lacking in any of my points. I'm by no means perfect, and my arguments, while driven by a deep-felt and sincere conviction, are not as thorough as perhaps they should be. That's on me to work on, but I'm happy to do my best in the meantime.

Part of my convictions are grounded in my belief in God, but as you are aware, they can't be my whole foundation, and if the person on the other side of the conversation doesn't share that belief, we need another point of common ground for our discussion. (Secular Prolife is an excellent resource if you want more in-depth, non-religious discussions of this topic. I know there are others, but I don't have the list in front of me.)

And it is important to explore all sides of the issue! It's kind of hard to argue coherently otherwise. I see this discussion all the time from people "on the other side" or on the fence, both people I know and total strangers. I'm familiar with a lot of their arguments, both the ones they consider good-faith and the ones that are obviously driven by vitriol. Listening to them only helps bring clarity to my own knowledge and convictions.

I know so many people who are "for abortion with exceptions" are sincerely motivated by concern for other people. The onus is on them to figure out why, for them, that means killing some people for the sake of others. It's not enough to say "Well, I've never been in that situation, so I don't have room to speak". Abortion is a human right's issue. We all have a place at the discussion. Because at the end of the day, it comes down to one thing:

Abortion is the intentional killing of a child, a human being. It doesn't matter the reason behind that killing, whether it's a question of health, social circumstance, situation in life, or fear. It is murder.

And it is never ok.

For further reading (the majority of these are actual links, not links to tumblr posts):

This post and the notes are my-go to for the breakdown of the key abortion arguments.

Choice42

Carrying To Term

New Wave Feminists

The Human Defense Initiative

Birthright International

Abortion73

Rehumanize International

And again, if you are looking for more nice and rational people who are willing to discuss things like adults, I can give you a list!

[datura-tea]

ok this has been brewing in my brain for a while now and i need to put it down somewhere, so... have the romantic relationships of my courier ocs (moz, kiwi, and avery) hehe

moz

gabe -> first love, childhood sweethearts; they almost became teenage parents. they broke up because moz wanted to explore the wasteland and gabe wanted to stay in their town. for a while, they would hook up whenever moz would come home but eventually stopped when gabe wanted to get serious with his eventual spouse. here's their ship tag (#when forever was us)

sydney -> first girlfriend; they met when they were matched at the boxing ring. moz won the fight, sydney bought her a celebratory drink, and they spent the night together. things ended when sydney threw a boxing match and left in the night with both of their winnings

allie and bien -> moz was only dating allie; she didn't know that allie was in an open marriage with bien, who knew about moz but didn't want to get involved initially. but when moz and allie started to get serious, bien wanted to get involved. allie's big reveal (that she was married, that her husband wanted to join in) didn't go as planned; moz freaked out at first, but was convinced to try being a throuple. it didn't work out, mostly because getting a third made allie and bien's marriage stronger, and they realized that they didn't really want another person in their relationship. they still keep in touch with moz. she visits them sometimes

arthur -> stabbed moz in the thigh after a big fight, then apologized profusely while calling over the resident doctor. once she was ok, moz punched him so hard he blacked out. she broke up with him right after, and swore off serious relationships for a while

a series of situationships and one night stands -> most of them are still friends with moz :) ringo is among this group, as is cass (they were a thing for a couple of months, then moz went to the big mt for a month, and cass moved on; here's their ship tag (#hangover heart))

ulysses -> oh you know ulysses and moz!! theyre the loves of each other's lives 💖 here's their ship tag (#we are bound by symmetry)

kiwi

jamey -> first kiss; jamey grew up with kiwi - his sister, marie, is kiwi's best friend. their relationship was nothing serious, just some teenage experimentation, significant only because it was the first for both of them

flirtations and flings -> kiwi has never taken anything seriously in their life, most of all romantic relationships. they flirt with every man they meet, regardless of their interest in the man. they constantly flirt with arcade just to rile him up even though theyre both not attracted to each other at all haha

the king -> kiwi's longest casual relationship, which only became more and more serious until eventually they get married. the king still has his groupies. kiwi still has their flings. they're both very happy with the arrangement here's their ship tag (#vegas royalty)

avery

river -> best friend, unrequited first love; avery had always had a crush on river, but river didn't return it. they used to practice kissing on each other though. unfortunately river discovered that he was very straight, while avery realized that he was a gay man. they stayed platonic friends

casual relationships -> having been on the run since his teens, avery never has the time to fully stay and develop a long-term relationship. but he doesn't like to be alone. so in every place he stops at, he manages to find someone to hook up with for a while. then, eventually, he leaves

ulysses -> casual on avery's side; serious on ulysses' side. they're bitter exes and ulysses actively wants avery dead. however, thanks to benny's bullet, avery only has vague memories of his time with ulysses. can't even remember his voice. oops! here's their ship tag (#so bury me in memory)

boone -> nothing happened between them but there was something between them. yknow how when you're freshly out of the grave and need a stoic man to snipe enemies for you because you can't even aim your gun and he's so big and capable and strong and protects you so well? yeah

arcade -> they clicked immediately, but avery fumbled arcade, but then they got back together before the battle for hoover dam, but then avery went with an ncr-run vegas so arcade had to go into hiding. it took a few years before he finds where arcade was hiding and a few months of groveling before they get back together (jury's still out on whether they stay together) here's their ship tag (#poor confidants)

[shenanigans-and-imagines]

ok first of all, completely OBSESSED with “Welcome to Hellfire” it was everything i needed and more. and second of all i remember you mentioning that lucy and eddie get into a fight before s4 and that’s kinda why she quits hellfire (i’m sorry if this is kinda wrong but i was scrolling through the tag and couldn’t really find it) and i was hoping you could maybe elaborate a bit more on that. like was the fight just initially about her quitting and it spiraled from there? i know that’s kinda why it was awkward when they first find eddie in the boat house but i crave details

Okay, this is actually something I’ve been chipping away at for a while. I don’t have any exact dialogue but I can give you the broad strokes.

Some background, their fight would take place after the events of season 3.

Hopper and Billy are dead and as far as Eddie knows, the Mall just burned down.

Lucy and Eddie haven’t been hanging out as much as a result, but it looks like things are going to turn around as Eddie’s birthday approaches

Eddie never expects anything from his birthday anymore, between his dead beat parents and his uncle working all the time, there has never been much of a celebration. He honestly kind of hates it.

But Lucy has been dropping hints all summer of doing something fun and for the first time in years, he starts to get his hopes up

She then surprises him with tickets to a metal concert (still debating which band)

Eddie honestly thinks this is it; things have been rocky but he’s going to tell her exactly how he feels about her after the concert

But it doesn’t happen

The night of the concert Lucy and some of the others get pulled away by Hawkins lab for a debriefing on everything that happened

Tests are run, they’re all grilled for details, anything and everything is questioned to make sure this never happens again

Lucy can’t even make a phone call to tell Eddie she won’t be able to make it

By the time they finish up it’s super late and Lucy goes rushing over to Eddie’s trailer to apologize

Eddie turns up not long after to see Lucy waiting on the front step

He drove to Indianapolis, but never ended up walking through the doors

He’s had a few hours of driving and brooding which has done no thing to help his feeling a when he sees Lucy

She immediately tries to apologize, but Eddie cuts her off telling her he didn't know what he expected

Lucy asks him, "what's that supposed to mean" and Eddie goes off

He lists all the times she'd blown him off all summer, how she's been spending time with Harrington and the popular crowd, and has in general been avoiding him

Lucy protests and tells her it's not like that, but Eddie shoots her back with, "okay then tell me where you were that was so important you couldn't even call"

She doesn't answer and Eddie takes that as a guilty conscious

Lucy insists that she can't tell him. If she could she would, but she can't.

Eddie presses her on what that even means, but Lucy doesn't budge

If anything the last twelves hours have driven home exactly why she can't tell him; people who find out about the Upside Down get hurt, she already lost Barb and nearly lost her brother more times than she can count, she doesn't want to see Eddie get hurt

She tells him he's just going to have to trust her

Eddie tells her he can't, because he can't think of anything that would be so bad she couldn't tell him unless she's trying to cover her ass

He tells her he's an idiot for thinking she was different from the shallow assholes that live in this fucking town and he cannot wait to graduate and get the hell away from all of them

Lucy can't defend herself and basically tells him, "well, I guess that's it then"

She can't convince him to trust her again unless she tells him the truth, and she can't tell him the truth because there is no way he'd believe her; she can't win

She tells him she's sorry one more time and leaves crying

They spend the next year avoiding each other with these last words to each other echoing in their brains

Questions torment Eddie every time he thinks of her; what the hell was so important? Was it actually important? Did she really just blow him off? What couldn't she tell him?

Every time he sees her passing in the hallways he just wants to talk to her again, but doesn't want to be hit with a brick wall he knows is waiting for him

Lucy meanwhile just lets the guilt eat away at her from the inside out

She can't blame Eddie for any of the words he said, from his perspective it was completely justified. He had every reason to think the worst of her, but at the same time. She's hurt that he did.

There are so many nights she's stared at her phone wanting to finally break the silence and tell him everything, but then she rolls back over and talks herself out of it

Of course, all her intentions end up blowing up in her face when Eddie gets sucked into everything anyway

[rogue-durin-16]

STICK TOGETHER

Summary: When Fred finds out Y/n is planning on leaving the Wizarding World, he canalizes his feelings in the worst way possible, which leads to a terrible outcome that seems unfixable.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Slytherin!Reader

Genre: angst

Tags:

Fred Weasley: @whiskeyn-rain @lumos-solemn

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog @amourtentiaa @just-here-to-escape-from-reality

Warnings: swearing

A/N: @meph1stophelian is here putting pressure on me to post this already so I'm apologizing for the poorly written ending lmaoo enjoy <3

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

"Fred, calm down." George begged me; he walked by my side, trying to talk some sense into me, but it was not the moment. "You gotta understand her— throwing a fit isn't going to help anyone—" I didn't even look in my twin's direction while he spoke. "Bloody hell, Fred—"

"Y/n!" I quickened my pace, leaving George behind after spotting her in one of the corridors, having a chat with a couple of Ravenclaws. "Can I have a word?"

"Sure— Oi!" I hadn't waited for her to reply before grabbing her hand and snatching her away to pull her into the nearest broom closet. "What was that about?"

"Tell me I heard Katie wrong and you're not actually leaving."

"I can't tell you that." She plainly responded, her voice steady.

A single, gobsmacked snide left my throat. "You're joking, right?" My heart ached as if it was being constricted when she shook her head no. "So you're fleeing?"

"What?"

"Things are getting ugly so you're running away."

Her eyes dug into mines as she stayed in a very uncomfortable silence before replying with. "So what if I am?" When I averted my eyes from hers, she called my name. Her eyes were somewhat softer now, with a gleam of plea in them. "For the last two years we had nothing but tragedy. Diggory died, You-Know-Who is back and recruiting, the ministry is full on going against a teenager, this pink colored nasty toad is physically abusing us, and on top of that, I have to put up with my housemates' bullshit for having muggle blood— I'm tired!" Her voice had raised a bit, enough for me to know she was struggling to keep it at bay, but still managed to. "If I can have a life out of this then—"

"You're a coward."

"Fred." there was a warning on her tone, but I couldn't listen.

"You're leaving... people behind," she attempted to reason; I didn't let her. "Dunno why I'm surprised, really. At the end of the day you're a Slytherin for a reason."

Her eyes started to well up, and I couldn't tell if it was with anguish or fury. I knew I was getting under her skin, but that was exactly what I intended to do; if I was going to leave that room scarred, so would she.

"Self-preservation, you call it." I scoffed, feeling my own rage building up faster each passing second. "Pure cowardy."

"Is that what you think?" Her tone wasn't steady anymore; she was holding back the poison of her words, for my sake.

"Yeah." I wasn't capable of doing the same thing for hers. "And I don't want your cheap excuses and emotional manipulation to convince me otherwise." My face was probably red due to the anger, my jaw and fists hurt from clenching them; I was off the rails, and the person who would usually stop me was standing in front of me. "Better leave now so you don't have the chance to sell us out when shit goes down."

Silence fell upon us, our gazes locked, equally watery and with the same amount of fury and sadness within them.

And finally she snapped. "Maybe I'm a coward, but you're a self-absorbed prat who's not able to see beyond your own ego!" The way she said it hurt me more than the sentence itself. "This is not gonna be a DADA class, Fred! I don't want to fucking die because I was too slow casting Protego."

"Good luck, Y/l/n." I curtly wished her before stalking out of the broom closet I have initially dragged her into.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

We avoided each other for a week. The following Monday, when I entered the Great Hall, I found George and Katie quite depressed.

"What's gotten into you?"

They shared a look before my brother turned to me, deciding to break the news himself.

"Y/n left last night." He gave me an apologetic look. "Thought she'd wait until the graduation—"

"But she's had enough." Katie finished, toying with her breakfast. "Honestly, I wish I had a life in the muggle world too."

My lungs were refusing to take the air inside; I felt as if I would choke if I stayed there, so I stormed out, jogging to reach the countryard.

I needed to breathe.

Even after the wind hit my face, that vital task felt like the most difficult thing in the world to accomplish.

I hate her I hate her I hate her I hate her.

A sob escaped my chest, realising the harsh words I had spat at her were probably the last ones she would ever hear from me.

I love her.

A Year And A Half Later

READER'S P. O. V.

I managed to apparate somewhere in the cornfield —the only place around the Burrow I remembered clearly.

I should have landed with a broom, but apparently, Mad-Eye didn't inform Lupin that I would serve as an extra escort for Harry if they were ambushed, so my broom was now smashed somewhere down the muggle road we had flown over.

Mentally cursing the damn moment in which I spoke to Shacklebolt in hopes of being useful in this war, I looked for the entrance of the Weasley home, which took me quite a while.

Funnily enough, it was Lupin who stepped out, wielding his wand and casting yet another hex at me that I somehow managed to block.

With a swift wave of my hand, he was propelled back into the house. "YOU!" A long-haired redhead I recognized as the eldest Weasley helped my old Professor up as I stalked to them with my wand up. "YOU HEXED MY BLOODY BROOM! I'M LUCKY TO BE ALIVE!"

"Y/n, calm down—" Shacklebolt was now besides me with his hands up. "He didn't know you were coming— he was trying to protect George from further harm."

My brain was slow to process his words, but as soon as it did, I started to down my arm. "What happened?"

"Snape hit him with the sectumsempra." My eyes widened at Lupin's heavy words.

"Did everyone else make it?" The three of them remained silent, the ginger shaking his head no.

My breath caught up in my throat, but before I could ask if Fred was alright, another tall ginger flashed the corner of my eye, and my head snapped to the living room's door.

FRED'S P. O. V.

Everyone was scattered around the house. Ginny took Hermione and Fleur to her room; Ron and Harry made its way up too; Tonks went out —she needed a moment alone to mourn Mad-Eye—, and, while my parents and I stayed with George, Lupin, Shacklebolt and Bill went to guard the entrance.

I was still kneeling by George's side, holding his hand while our mother healed his wound the best she could, when we heard a yell followed by a strong blow in the kitchen.

I looked at my mum and dad, my eyes flickering to my twin while I reached for my wand.

As I got up, more yells were heard, this time clearer; the voice was familiar— I knew that voice all too well.

There she stood, at the entrance of my home.

Her eyes met mines as soon as she caught a glimpse of me, and my head started to spin. I knew I had no right to do what I was about to do, but after that night's events, in which the war became very much real, I couldn't help but rush to her and engulf her in a tight hug.

Surprisingly enough, I couldn't take more than two steps forward, since she did what I intended to do first.

"You're alright." She mumbled against my shoulder. My eyes shut, trying to block the tears that threatened to fall. "How's he?" She inquired whilst pulling away with a concerned frown.

Not trusting my voice, I nodded in the living room's direction. A quiet sough escaped my lips as she passed by, her hands lingering on my arms for a brief instant before she entered the room and took careful steps towards the settee.

I barely caught a couple of words from George and Y/n's exchange, my mind still buzzing due to the shock.

"What do you say, Freddie?" I frowned at my twin, regretting not listening to the conversation. "She can take my bed, right? I'm not gonna get far anyway."

"Right." I agreed, struggling for my voice to come out steady. It was Y/n we were talking about; I had known her since our fourth year, I had been friends and more with her, seeing her shouldn't be that nerve-wracking.

A couple of minutes later, we were all heading to our respective rooms, and as I closed my room's door behind me and Y/n, it dawned on me that I had underestimated the anxiety that could cause me being left alone with her.

Get it together, Fred.

"If you want, you can grab a shirt from the drawer." I finally managed to speak, motioning at the chest besides the window. She nodded and turned to it to look for one she could sleep in.

Now that I had the opportunity, I carefully observed her, and soon realized how much she had changed in the time we were apart. Not only when it came to her physical appearance; she stood a bit straighter, talked a little calmer; the joy with which she used to sparkle was dim now, eclipsed by a severe, worried attitude— a sign of us no longer being the kids who messed around at Hogwarts.

"I missed you" I knew right away that wasn't the best start for the conversation.

"It sure didn't seem like it." The bitterness in her tone stung my heart harsher than I expected.

"You're still mad?" The way I was conducting the conversation was making me want to bang my head against the wall.

She sighed, turning around now that she had the shirt on to meet my gaze. "A year and a half, Fred. You didn't contact me for a year and a half. I thought we were friends."

"You left me behind!" I talked back, partly because I panicked, but also because I, to my surprise, was still mad too. "What did you even expect?"

"A letter?" She questioned, throwing herself down on the bed. "I mean— I didn't really expect anything, but a letter would have been a good way to let me know you didn't fucking hate me." My eyes, now fixed on my lap, went wide when Y/n's voice broke at her last three words.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled, quite ashamed of having to apologise while also being scared of saying anything that could harm her further. "I'm sorry about not writing and- uh... I'm sorry about what I said to you. I know it's not an excuse but I was really mad and..." I cleared my throat and felt the blush creeping up my neck even before I finished the sentence. "... and hurt 'cause you- I thought that maybe I wasn't important enough to you and- yeah, I'm sorry about what I said." I tried meeting her eyes but they were fixed on the wall before her.

"It's fine." She shrugged, "I guess you were right anyway."

"I wasn't right-"

"You were." She hugged her knees to her chest and hid her face there. "Wanna know why I'm back?" She didn't need my response. "They're hunting down my family." My heart stopped beating for a second due to the shockingly deadpanning tone. "A friend gave me a tip-off— they were tracking them down. I got to them just in time." I refrained myself from asking about them —the less I knew, the better. "So yeah, you're right, I was a coward and left people behind."

My body shot up and my legs carried me to George's bed; without me being fully aware of what I was doing or which consequences it could have, I sat down and pulled Y/n into my arms.

Though she was shocked at first, her body soon relaxed into the familiarity of my arms, and she let out a relieved sigh. "You're not alone on this." I whispered, pecking her crown. "I'm here, okay?"

"So you don't hate me?" She murmured against my chest.

Maybe it was the fragility of her voice, or the warmth of her embrace I missed so much; maybe it was this past year and a half of regret, or the night's events, but I couldn't hold back my words.

"I love you."

And even though she went stiff, even if I had just blurted them out almost in accident, I didn't regret saying them, because I, in fact, loved her.

She pulled away to look into my eyes. "You mean it?"

"Yeah." I replied, calmer than I had been in a while. "And I'm really sorry about everything, if I could turn back time—" words and air were cut off by her lips crashing against mines.

We had kissed before, but it was on a bet's behalf or to prank someone; this was different, this was her pouring her 'I love you' into actions, and I embrace it gladly.

"No more running away." I commanded when she pulled back. "From now on, we stick together." She nodded, her forehead resting against mine and her palms on my chest.

[echo-three-one]

Whatever It Takes : RELOADED

Abducted in a decent hotel room. That's the summary.

Table of Contents

Previous Chapter : Lurking in the Shadows

Chapter 19 to another story made by Ray (echo-three-one) Comments and Reviews appreciated! I hope you enjoy! Love you all ❤️

forgive the piccrew ;-;

Vlad the Janitor

Samantha Coleman

Happy Traveler Inn - Room 240

Moscow, Russia

"Room Service!" Someone knocked at the door and something in Russian followed. Samantha assumed it's the same thing but in Russian. She carefully eyed the three men whom she knew were secretly armed. They were members of Shepherd's secret force, the one he calls "Shadow Company".

She's tired of being held hostage, she just wanted to live a normal life. And if Alex was correct, she can't believe that she chose to forget him just to get another shot at a normal life. She felt stupid. And she actually missed him. Even with all the jumbled and altered memories, her heart reacted to his presence.

The three abductors looked at her threateningly as the janitors entered. She knew she wasn't supposed to act suspicious or she's dead.

"We don't need cleaning!" One exclaimed as he shoved the janitor to the door, out of surprise the two janitors immediately grabbed mops and brooms and began fighting the abductors.

Samantha described it as a scene straight out of the movies, the trio worked together, hitting enemies until they were knocked down by severe hits in the head. They quickly disarmed and bound the abductors.

The tall janitor approached her, his eyes felt familiar but Samantha was reluctant to accept help. She eyed his name tag which said "Hello I'm VLAD"

"Thanks, Vlad?" She guessed, Vlad quickly removed his hat and face mask.

"Aw come on, Samantha. It's me!" Alex smiled, behind him, Roach and Soap stood and looked happy to see her.

Samantha's heart skipped a beat. She was right. He did go to the ends of the world for her multiple times. That meant that whatever they shared back on her memory lapses were far too significant for him. She hugged him tight and he reciprocated it quickly. She wanted to kiss him already but in their situation, it was better to keep it for later.

"Here you go, Alex." Soap tossed him the abductor's uniform as they quickly changed from janitors to bodyguards as they escorted her back to safety.

"Ghost this is Alex. The package is secure. Prepare for exfil."

"Roger that, pal." He replied as they effortlessly exited the hotel, leaving a message to Shepherd that he should not mess with them.

The elevator ride was the most awkward place for Samantha. The tension between her and Alex were reaching new heights. Their eye contacts felt more intense and small grazes from their hands felt like small jolts of electricity. Her heart raced so fast that she bit her lip.

"Thanks for saving me guys. For a second I thought you were never going to find me." She breathed as Alex slowly locked his hand on hers. She felt her cheeks warm up as his touch sent her on an ecstatic feeling. Was he really like this to her?

"You're still our priority, Samantha. Disbanded or not." Roach grinned as the elevator dinged upon reaching the Parking lot. In front of them was Price, driving the van and Ghost slowly sliding the door open.

"Welcome back, Samantha." The masked man greeted them as they entered the vehicle.

~

Safe House 110197

Brazil

Alex somewhat expected familiarity or nostalgia from Samantha, but all she remembered was the name of the safehouse. The number combination was somewhat familiar. She felt guilty and frustrated once she stepped foot on the house, as none of the items rang something from her memory while Alex took effort in recalling everything they did during their stay there, things that Samantha didn't expect she'd do but wanted to feel all over again.

Amidst the stress of the things happening around them, Maxine and Francine were getting along as they prepared a little feast once they heard that Samantha's on the way here. Maxine cried as she hugged her best friend and Samantha couldn't help but also shed tears.

"I missed you. Are you okay? Did they hurt you?" She asked, those same words also came out of Alex's mouth earlier, guess she was that important to the two of them?

"I'm fine, Max. They didn't hurt me or anything. Shepherd was actually out to use me as a bargaining chip so that my Dad would help him." The room fell silent. This was what they needed to hear. Intel.

Before lunch was even served, they already gathered around the dinner table. Alex finally sat beside Samantha, and that meant Ghost was the only one without a partner.

Samantha discussed the case at hand. How Shepherd would give Nero an IP Address in exchange for blueprints of an EMP Nuke. He'll then use such machinery to combat Nero's assault as well as avenge 30,000 of his defeated troops in Afghanistan. He also has his own elite troop called Shadow Company, which were trained the same way as the 141, but they had strength in numbers.

The rest of the evening was devastating. Now that they had information on Shepherd, Price and Jack started to call in some favors and prepared for the best window to fight back. Ghost got a text from Agent Ryder of interpol that she was too late to stop the trade of funds and now Shepherd has put the remaining 141 as most wanted people. Laswell also called Price that the initial plan of creating a task force was not going to work considering they're already fugitives and they should be more careful outdoors. Everyone else looked like they saw this one coming, they already knew the risks of the things they've done and proceeded to live their lives.

Samantha caught a glimpse of Max and Roach sprinkling each other water while washing the dishes, Soap and France arguing about how the word 'whimsy' was supposed to be used in a sentence and Ghost was always on his command center. She felt that she was never gone.

"How are you holding up, Love?" Alex plopped beside her, giving her a glass of water. Samantha smiled and raised her eyebrows.

"I don't remember you calling me that." She questioned, as she noticed the faint smell of Alex that she began to admire.

"Of course you don't. That's why I'm helping you." he grinned, tucking her hair behind her ear. She giggled and inhaled once more.

"You smell good today… Are you still trying to win my heart? I thought you already did." She mused, blushing as she ran a hand across his strong inked arms. She was always scared of heavily tattooed men, but this guy was an exception to the rule.

"Well, I wore clothes from two different people today… so… but nevermind that reason. Is it working? To you…? Are you… smitten?" He wiggled his eyebrows in an attempt to be seductive and Samantha just laughed. Was it possible to fall in love with a guy whom you already love? If so, then she's all for it.

"I can't say for sure, Vlad." She teased as he quickly fished his wallet, revealing a letter inside a small ziploc container. He gave it to Samantha as she uncrumpled it and started to read the contents.

"What's this?" she asked, looking at her own writing, she started to feel scared and nervous about the letter.

"You left that note to me before you forgot me… I tried to keep it for as long as I could, to the point that I almost wanted to throw it away." he held her hand while she held the letter.

"My Dearest Alex…" She spoke softly. Her hands began to tremble as he gently tightened his grip on her, making her feel more at ease.

"...In a span of three weeks, you managed to make me feel love once again. You allowed me to realize that even after a horrible loss, I could still open my heart and feel the joy of falling in love." This was clearly her creation, she slowly turned to Alex as he smiled and nodded his head to continue.

"...I always told myself that no matter how painful it is, I'll never forget your face, your smile, your eyes and all those memories we shared together. I actually convinced myself that we were a happily married couple back in that safehouse, an illusion I made because my heart felt like it. It was a good feeling, and I want to thank you for it." She leaned on his shoulders, looked at him once more and mouthed "Sorry".

"It looked like I forgot…" tears started to well on her eyes and Alex smiled. He wasn't the crying type but his eyes were already starting to get wet.

"I can't help but think about a lot of things, one being that if we were destined to meet and not end up together, it would be better if I don't meet you at all. I'm sorry to say this but I do love you so much and I know I promised, but I think my heart couldn't carry the idea of you existing and not within my grasp. It's utterly heartbreaking." she sobbed, hot tears fell from her cheek and Alex immediately wiped them off with his thumbs as she continued reading, her voice was shaky.

"So, your office offered me a chance to alter my memories of meeting you, along with the memory that made Nero look for me. You were on a briefing and I wanted to talk to you personally, maybe feel your warmth one last time. I'd want to kiss you too, but I guess the world didn't want that to happen." She looked at Alex one more time, then their lips met, it was a small peck, their lips immediately parted upon contact. She looked back at her letter"

"So I took the offer, and by the time you read this, I'm already on my way home to resume the life I've lost. I'm sure Maxine misses me right now...

I know you'll agree to this because I feel you always want what's best for me. If our paths would cross again, I hope you'll remember me the way I remembered you before I take this operation, A good memory that's supposed to last forever.

Apologizing in advance if I don't remember you anymore.

Don't you dare forget about me,

- Samantha" Teardrops splattered across the paper as she folded it and reached for Alex's mouth, this time they went all out. Like teenagers who shared their first french kiss, sloppy, needy yet satisfying. They didn't care about their surroundings. All they both cares about was that they were within each other's grasp after a very long time.

"I guess you kept my word. You never forgot me…" She exhaled as they broke the kiss.

"It's because I can't… and I told myself that I won't." Alex replied as they kissed once again. This time, they could hear Maxine and Roach cheering in the background.

"Geez! Get a room you two!" A loud Scottish yell was heard from the distance. But despite all the noise, the two of them didn't mind.

~

Samantha was brushing her teeth when Alex snuck up from behind, wrapping his arms around her. She remembered how she admitted to the letter that they acted like a married couple, maybe this was always their thing for weeks. She was happy as they both swayed harmoniously, looking at the most handsome man in the world, hugging her.

"Do hmm haa hoo heemmmi hoo?" She mumbled while her hands brushed her teeth.

"We don't. But if we had one what would you think it'd be?" Alex mused, turning to her. He already knew what she meant despite it being inaudible. She spat the contents of her mouth and finished brushing her teeth before turning to him, all while still under his warm embrace.

"Have you heard of Way Back into Love?" she asked, Alex's reaction was a very wholesome smile.

"Like from that movie? Yeah." he chuckled, minty breath traveled to her nostrils.

"All I want to do is find a way back into love…" she sang softly, her singing voice made Alex smile.

"I can't make it through without a way back into love…" Alex sang or more specifically, said the words near the tune. Samantha giggled as they swayed to their little song.

"And if I open my heart again

I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end" They sang together, Samantha doing it in tune while Alex sounded like he's narrating the song. They both were spinning around on the small area in front of the sink, enjoying the moments that they were together once again. Samantha wishing that she'll never get separated from Alex ever again.

Next Chapter : Undying Admiration

Notification Squad my Beloved

@enderio @whimsywispsblog @beemybee @samatedeansbroccoli @smokeywhalee @ricinbach

[onlyyyariii]

The Interview

Pt 5

Indent/italics indicates flashback

Right as we're about to exit my house, wow it's weird to say 'my house'. Grayson has been living with me for a while so I've just been calling it our house. Anywho right as we're about to exit my house, Grayson stops me.

"Wait." He says, placing a hand on my shoulder.

I set down my bag and turn around to face him, "Yes?"

"I- Would it be easier for you if we had our last kiss here or at the airport?"

I stared up at him for a moment before looking down at my entwined hands. Would it be easier here? Yes, it would be because I don't want Ethan to see us kiss. This thought made me feel guilty. Like I was cheating on Grayson.

"Here, kiss me here." I say, glancing up at him.

I see tears spring to his eyes as he gives me a small smile. I have to make this a good kiss for him. He bends down and wraps his arms around my waist, picking me up so I wrap my legs around him.

"Grayson I-"

"This is easier for me, sweetheart. I know, it's just one kiss."

I wrapped my arms around his neck and leaned down to touch my lips to his. It was a powerful kiss, with lots of emotion. A very passionate moment that made tears spring to my eyes. I pulled away because I knew it was getting out of hand. I jumped down and turned towards the door. I looked back just in time to see Grayson wipe the tear trails off of his face.

"Okay, are you ready to go?"

He scratches the back of his neck, "Um yeah, let's do it."

We both get into the car, and as Grayson's driving I can see how hard it is for him to keep his hands to himself. Not in a bad way! I mean like, it's hard for him to not hold my hand or place his hand on my thigh. I know we both feel the awkward tension creeping in, so I hook up the aux cord to my phone and start playing Kid Cudi. We glance at each other with small smiles, reminiscing the memories we had jamming out to this music. As we pull up to the airport Grayson grabs my bag out of the car and starts to walk up to the doors of the airport.

"Um Gray!?"

He stops and turns to look at me, "Yes?"

"I think it would be better if we parted ways out here."

His small smile fades to a frown, "Oh, um, okay. I'm sorry I didn't realize I-"

"No! You're okay. I just... it'd be easier for me if we parted ways out here. I know you and Ethan have a lot of packing to do and-"

"No, no it's okay. You're right, it is easier this way."

"So you understand?" I look at him hopefully.

"Yeah I understand. You sure you can handle your suitcase though?"

I smile, "Grayson if I can handle you at night in the same bed than I can handle anything."

He chuckles and wraps me in a hug before kissing my forehead and hopping back in the car. I wave as he drives away. I let out a deep breath I didn't realize I was holding in. I didn't want to sit there with Grayson and act like everything is normal when it's not. Two twin brothers, that I've known my whole life, both want to date me and I don't know who to choose. The logical choice is Grayson because he was there for me when Ethan pushed me aside. But I know in my heart I still love Ethan.

"Liana?"

I whip my head around to see Ethan standing behind me.

"Ethan!? What are you doing here? You're supposed to be helping Grayson."

"I had to see you before you left."

"Ethan you saw me earlier I-"

"I had to see you without Grayson."

I breathe out a breath, as much as I didn't want my heart to flutter at his words, it did.

"Oh."

He sat down beside me and grabbed my hand. He intertwined our fingers and played with the ring on my middle finger. It was the promise ring Grayson gave me. I've been so used to wearing it that I never took it off. I watch as Ethan clenches his jaw and closes his eyes. I could see the annoyance in his eyes when they reopen.

"E I'm sorry I didn't realize I was still wearing it."

"No, he gave it to you. I'm not going to stop you from wearing something if you want to."

I smile, he really has changed. Of course I would continue to wear the ring. I still have the tattoo that I got with Ethan (tattoo picture below). After Ethan and I broke up I would just tell everyone it was my moms first initial, Evangeline. I watch as Ethan grabs my hand and flips it over to see my wrist. He smiles when he notices the tattoo.

"You didn't get it covered up?"

"No, why would I? It's the first tattoo I ever got. Yeah it may be your initial but it's one of the most important tattoo's that I have."

"What are your other important ones?"

"Well I have the e with a heart on my wrist, I have a g behind my ear, and I have an s on my finger."

"So the E's for me, the g," he rolls his eyes, "is for Grayson right, and who's the s for?"

"Sean, your dad. He was like my dad too, so I got the S to commemorate him."

I watch as tears well up in his eyes.

"Oh E," I hold his face in my hands, "don't cry. I'll have it covered up if you don't want me to have it."

"No that's not it. Um, I think it's great that you have it. I just- I can't believe that I ever let you get away."

A blush rises to my cheeks. Ethan wraps his hand around my chin and leans in. I let him kiss me, and... and it reminds me of this one date we once had.

"Ethan stop..." I say with a giggle.

"How else am I supposed to wake you up? You don't like the kisses?"

"No, I love them. But I love them even more when I can kiss you back." I say, slightly pouting.

"Well I'm awake, you're now awake, I think we're both wide awake, don't you say?"

"Yeah why?"

"Because now," he says, pulling me on top of him, "now we can do more than just kiss." He finishes, raising an eyebrow.

"Ethan we just woke up."

"Yeah and we need to start the day off right, I know I would have a much better day if I got to have you first."

He pulls me closer and litters kisses all over my neck and jawline.

"E that tickles!" I exclaim, my smile already hurting my cheeks.

I smile as the memory floods my mind. I open my eyes to meet Ethan's gaze.

"You look like your daydreaming."

"Not daydreaming just... remembering."

"Oh that's funny because I-"

He gets cut off by the intercom system calling for people to board my plane.

"Well," I say, standing up, "that's me."

He stands up quickly, "Um could I walk you over to where you need to board?"

"Sure, of course you can."

I watch as he grabs my suitcase handle and pulls it behind him as we walk to the terminal.

"E I hope you know that you coming here doesn't affect any decision I'm going to make."

"I just, I had to see you one last time before Australia. I don't know how long you'll be in Jersey for but I really hope you find what you're looking for. Because I miss you. Everyday, all the time, I miss you. It was wrong of me to move on so fast and I didn't really love Kristina I was just trying to get over you because I wasn't ready for marriage. I thought that when her and i were steady for a while, I thought maybe I'll try it. Maybe I'll propose and if she says no, then so be it. But she didn't, she said yes and we got married. It was stupid, now I know you don't want to hear this but I messed up and said your name instead of hers one night. She got pi**y with me and ran off. I didn't see her until a week later. Everything was fine I apologized and we were good up until about a month later she told me she was pregnant. I was excited because I was going to be a dad. When I overhead her talking to one of her doctors about she wasn't sure who the dad was I demanded for a paternity test. When the results came back that I wasn't the dad, I immediately called up my lawyer and had him write up divorce papers as soon as possible. I sent them to her as soon as they were done and now we're divorced. Sure I never expected to end up divorced at 24, but things happen for a reason. I think we're meant to find each other and be happy again. I know you have to board your plane but I want you to know that I love you and I'll be waiting for you in Australia."

I smile and wrap him in a hug before kissing his cheek. No ones perfect. I'm not, Ethan's not, and Grayson's not. I love them for who they are, now I just have to find out which one is ready to be completely mine.

*******

Tag list: @blindedbythelightt @fangdolan @luxplsr @rhyrhy462 @333dolans

[greenappleeyes]

Secret Lives (Part 2)

Words: 2.6k

Summary: You and Steve become closer after you insist he stay with you at your motel instead of sleeping at the Gas-n-Sip.

Warnings: Smut (pretty vanilla, some dirty talk, unprotected sex,) some language, fluffy

A/N: Tag list is at the end, let me know if you’d like to be added.

—————

Your motel room was definitely not the Ritz, but it was clean, had decent water pressure, and a small kitchenette. To you, it was nothing fancy; to Steve, after all he had been through, it was more than he felt he deserved.

The first night wasn’t nearly as awkward as it should have been. You both continued to talk, sitting in your own beds, until the silences became longer and longer. “Do you work tomorrow?” you asked him sleepily.

Without opening his eyes he sighed in the way someone does when they really, really don’t want to go back to work. “Yes. I need to be back to open the store. It’s quite a walk, so I will have to be up…”

You cut him off, “Don’t be silly. I’ll give you a lift and pick you up when you’re done working.”

He wanted to argue, but he was too thankful for the gesture. The extra sleep and not having to walk a couple miles sounded too wonderful to pass up. “Thank you, Y/N. You are very kind.”

—————

The second night was bound to be much more awkward than the first and it was entirely your fault. While he was at work, you thought it was a good idea to open an over-shaken carbonated beverage on your bed. The resulting explosion of foamy liquid soaked through all the bedding and deep into the mattress. As you were attempting to clean the mess, Steve called to inform you that he was finished with his shift.

In the car, you broke the news about your bed to him. “Sorry Steve, it might be a little more cozy tonight.” You looked at him sheepishly and he simply cocked his head to the side and let you explain. “I kind of ruined my bed. So we will need to share tonight.” You paused for a moment and became even more embarrassed. “If that’s ok! I… um… I can sleep in one of the chairs. I’m shorter than you so I’d fit better. And I can't…”

He smiled and cut off your rambling. “It’s ok. The bed is large enough to accommodate both of us comfortably.” You we so often caught off guard by how he phrased things. He was clearly an educated man; he knew countless historical facts and spoke multiple languages. Yet, he often didn’t understand certain slang terms, colloquialisms, or even pop culture references.

—————

Sitting up on the headboard, watching TV and chatting with Steve turned to be a lot less awkward than you had initially thought it would be. You both sat comfortably on your own sides, but your eyes often drifted to him. He was wearing a light button up shirt and jeans that made it easy to see some of his muscle definition. You also found his perfectly defined jawline to be quite the distraction. You somehow managed to keep yourself subtle and looked away before he noticed you were staring.

When you were trying to not look at him, he was looking at you. He had found the human female form attractive prior to losing his grace, but was able to control any urges he might have had. Now, not only was he human but he was no longer a virgin. His time with April weeks earlier had given him a taste of giving in to those urges; which proved to make them stronger.

You were dressed like a typical hunter. Plain tank top layered with a flannel shirt, tight jeans, and boots. You had lost the boots and flannel shirt in an attempt to get more comfortable. Unfortunately, it also had an effect on Steve. He found it hard to not stare at your cleavage when you folded your arms under your breasts; or when his eyes would widen as they would drift to your ass when you’d bend over.

He felt ashamed of himself for thinking lustful thoughts about you after the kindness you had shown him. He never realized how lonely being human could be and you were his first, as far as he knew, normal friend. Of course he has Sam and Dean, but they didn’t exactly fit in his new life; and he clearly didn’t fit into theirs after Dean had asked him to leave the bunker.

You may not have known each other for more than a couple days, but he already cared about you. He didn’t want to jeopardize his friendship with you by acting on his lustful thoughts.

—————

It took the motel staff an entire week to get the mattress taken care of, not that you minded. Having him close by was comforting to you. It was also incredibly frustrating when he started sleeping without a shirt. That first shirtless night was a torment to you. But he had shown no interest in you, in a physical way, so you continued to keep yourself composed.

You rarely let yourself get too close to people. This life didn’t typically allow for a lasting relationship; your choices being one night stands or settling for another hunter. Either way, it was more about a physical connection than anything else. It felt different with Steve, somehow. He didn’t want anything from you beyond companionship; although you could tell he liked to be close to you, even letting his fingers brush over yours on occasion. His light touches never lingering, but they were still a comfort.

It caused a strange feeling for you. On one hand, you were happy that he just enjoyed your company without constantly trying to turn everything into a sexual situation; like every other man you had ever met. On the other hand, he was gorgeous. But it was more than that, for once you really liked a guy. The fact that he never tried to make a move on you actually made you like him more.

He had begun to feel more deeply for you as well. It proved difficult for him to entirely keep his hands to himself. Every touch was deliberate and light; enough for him to feel the smallest connection to you, without you noticing what he was doing. On more than one occasion, he would gently brush hair behind your ear as you slept. In those moment, it took all his willpower to keep himself from placing his lips on yours.

—————

Then, the week was over and you had your bed back. You both felt like you were miles away from one another. You both desperately wanted to be in each other’s arms that night, but were both still too stubborn and worried about rejection.

You were the first one to break. After a long 3 days of him working 12 hour shifts at the Gas-n-Sip, then falling asleep rather quickly all the way over in his bed; you had missed him. You wanted to have another one of your lengthy conversations about any random topic, but you knew he was tired and needed his sleep. You laid awake until you heard him shifting around in his sleep. The shifting turned to thrashing as he groaned and whimpered in his sleep.

You were no stranger to nightmares, and this one sounded like a doozy. You weren’t even thinking of the fact that you had gotten warm and were only wearing a tank top and panties at the moment or that he might find the gesture more creepy than comforting.

Quickly, you crawled into his bed and ran your fingers gently through his hair. “Hey, Steve.” you whispered. “Wake up, it’s just a nightmare.”

He jolted awake, terrified. He never had dreams or nightmares as an angel; so he never got the chance to get used to them. When he looked up and saw you, he didn’t think, he just acted. He reached up and yanked you down to him, holding on to you tightly. His heart was racing, his breath was ragged, and tears stung his eyes. He never felt as helpless as he did in those first moments after a nightmare.

You laid there with him, rubbing soothing circles on his skin and speaking softly into his ear until he calmed down and finally spoke. “Thank you. I’m sorry that I woke you. Sometimes these… nightmares are overwhelming.”

“It’s ok. I get them too. I’m just glad I could help.” You felt a little bad for enjoying this embrace as much as he was. Until you remembered that you both were not very clothed. You started to pull away, feeling a little self conscious. “I..”

“No.” he said suddenly, hugging you even tighter. “Please stay. I’d rather not be alone right now.”

“Ok. I’m not going anywhere. We can just hang out for as long as you want. You don’t work tomorrow, so we can sleep in.” Without thinking you moved to place a chaste kiss on his cheek, accidentally catching the corner of his mouth.

You pulled back quickly and started to apologize when moved his hand up to the base of your neck to still your movement. He glanced between your eyes and lips for a second before hesitantly moving towards you.

Your lips touched gently at first. It was as sweet and tentative as you would have expected from him. What you didn’t expect was him threading his hand through your hair, tightening his grip on your waist, and deepening the kiss. As his tongue moved against your bottom lip, you wondered where he had been hiding this kind of passion and quickly granted him access.

His kiss was dominant, but needy. He rolled you over so he was mostly on top of you; keeping his hips away from yours. You giggled as you assumed he was trying to be polite and hide his obvious arousal. He moved away from your lips and kissed along your jawline, mumbling into your skin. “Mmm. So soft, so tempting. I tried to resist, but I can’t anymore.” He placed open mouthed kisses along your neck as he continued to mumble. “So beautiful. So kind. Mmm… perfect.”

You thought you were going to melt; literally melt. His words were so sweet and his actions were so hot. You moaned his name as nibbled on the sweet spot of your neck. You were overwhelmed by him, but yet you needed more. He had yet to place his hands on your body, keeping one in your hair and the other propping him up slightly.

“Steve,” you whispered breathlessly, “touch me.”

He chuckled into your skin, “Y/N, I am touching you.” He then bit gently on your neck before running his tongue over your pulse point causing your to cry out again.

“Please, Steve. I need more. I need you.” You never knew you could sound so desperate. Under any other circumstance, you would have been mortified. But you don’t care right now, he had you wound far too tight to think about anything other than him.

Hearing your pleas spurred him on as he slowly brought his hand down from your hair. He stared at you as he traced his finger down your neck, across your collar bone, and down your chest. He stopped just as he reached the top of your breast and looked you in the eyes again. “Are you sure you want this?” His confidence seemed to have dissipated some.

You grabbed his hand and shoved it over you breast underneath your tank top. “Yes. I am completely sure.” He massaged your breast and kissed his way down your chest. You mewled as he pulled your tank top out of the way and ran his tongue around your erect nipple.

Your hips bucked and your thighs rubbed together in a failed attempt to gain the friction you desperately needed. You couldn’t take it anymore, so you pushed him off you and rolled to straddle him. You could feel his hard member pressed against your core between the light layers of clothing. When you pulled your top off completely, fully exposing your breasts to him; he grunted as he sat up pulling your hips into his and wrapped his mouth around your nipple again.

You ground yourself down on him causing him to let out a loud, pleasured groan. Leaning down to place your lips right next to his ear, you whispered,“I need you inside me, baby. I need you, now.”

He growled and bucked his hips up into you before throwing you backwards and hooking his fingers in your underwear before pulling them down your legs. Normally, you would have been self conscious and closed your legs. But tonight, you were too turned on and wanted to give a good show. You spread your legs wide for him and rubbed two fingers through your wet folds, throwing your head back and moaning at the feeling.

He shifted slightly to pull his boxers down just far enough to free his achingly hard cock. He moved your hand away and rubbed himself through your wetness. “Is this what you want? Tell me how bad you need it?”

When his tip reached your clit, you gasped. “Please! Oh fuck, Steve…pleeeohhh fuck!”

He slowly pressed himself inside you before you could even finish begging for his cock. He grabbed your knees and pulled you wide open before him so he could watch himself sink into you. Once he was fully seated inside you, he groaned. “So beautiful. You take me so well, don’t you? I knew you would.”

You bucked your hips involuntarily and moaned at his words. Before you could beg him to move, he pulled back and slammed into you. He immediately set a harsh pace, causing him to have to hold your hips tightly to keep you from flying off the bed. All you could do was grab the sheets and hold on for dear life.

He knew that if he kept his hard and fast pace he’d never last long enough. He let go of your hips to stretch down over you and wrapped his arms under your shoulders. You instinctively hooked your ankles around his waist and ran your fingers through his hair before pulling him in for a deep kiss.

You could tell that he was he was getting close, so you snaked your hand between the two of you and rubbed your clit; occasionally splitting your fingers to rub on either side of his shaft where he penetrated you. The extra friction was enough to get you where you needed. You moaned into his ear, “Come on, baby. Fuck! Come with me.”

A few hard thrust later he felt your walls clench around him as you came screaming his name. He quickly followed you over the edge shouting, “Fuck! Y/N!” His sudden use of profanity reignited your fading orgasm causing you to cry out again.

He rolled off you and pulled you close again. He looked at you and gave you a sheepish smile. “I may have gotten carried away. I apologize for my roughness… and language. I didn’t cause you any discomfort, did I?”

“Discomfort?!” You laughed loudly. “Oh my fuck, no. That was amazing, Steve. You were amazing. Unexpected? Maybe. But still incredible.”

He pulled you close and kissed your forehead, smiling. “Good, I’m glad it was enjoyable. It was rather unexpected, wasn’t it? I had not intended on laying with you tonight, but I’m happy it happened.”

“Me too.” You said with a yawn. “Me too.”

He settled, getting more comfortable. “Sleep now. We have a big day of not leaving this bed tomorrow.”

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