#this is not serious…. unless

[technically-human]

5 PhDs + 1

@lalalaurieart happy birthday! I offer you one of my silly headcanons

None of Robotnik's degrees are in medicine. Why should he care about that? His interest in the human body ends with his own. That is, until one time when Stone got really hurt, and the Doctor could do nothing. He coped by... teaching himself everything there is to know about medicine! He's very normal like that. Never bothered getting a degree for that one though.

[inkskinned]

don't worry, they're joking! they're always joking when it would be something, like bigoted. because i'm not a bigot, obviously, i just vote for bigots - well, they're not bigots either, you can't really call someone a bigot just because they have religious views. this is the land of the free, and it's a christian nation, after all. you can pretend otherwise but let's just be real here; all our values are really based on the bible. anyway, i know you liberals get your panties in a twist - can i say that, or are you gonna cancel me, haha, #metoo - about every little joke he said and every little dramatic political view. oh, fascist this and fascist that. you are online too much, you love the word fascist because it's big and you're just paranoid about things.

well, no, i don't, like, read the policies. i have a life. and so what if they wrote - stop it, it's not a manifesto, okay? he eventually backed off from that - oh the vice president? who cares about that guy, that isn't real power. you're being dramatic, they're just spitballing. everyone makes big claims when they're out there campaigning. he just means he personally wouldn't get gay married. you want him to divorce his wife and get gay married? anyway, even if they cancelled gay marriage - it wouldn't happen, okay? nobody i know really cares about that - it'd be states-rights like those abortions you love so much. and you live in a blue state. you live in like the gay capital of the world. i don't know why it'd be so bad for you, you're borrowing trouble there.

and besides, you're missing the point of his campaign! you people want to be victims so bad you completely ignore what we're really voting for. there are tons of good things that happened because of his name and his policies - the economy, for one. oh stop, just because i can't tell you what a tariff is off the top of my head doesn't mean i don't have eyes. and stuff was better under him! well, yeah, anything good is his work, obviously. what? no, all the bad stuff was biden. and probably also obama. what do you even care about this, anyway? it's not going to effect you. it's four years.

oh my god, not the climate change argument again, i'm not getting into that. i don't care about it. if my house is beachfront that's great news for me. and we don't really know what's causing it. no, i saw you forwarded me those articles and i just laughed. what, do you think i have time to sit on my ass and read shit? huh? well, no, i like reading the babylon bee. they actually had a great article about all you climate freaks. and in the meantime, what do you want me to do? i'm not paying 4 dollars for gas. liberals love to talk about solutions but never pay for the solutions. what do you mean blocked because of congress. you gotta stop with the conspiracy shit.

no, my side doesn't have real conspiracy theories. the vaccine thing is a real thing. besides, you yourself don't like big pharma. just because i have an opinion, suddenly now you think big pharma is great? and this is serious, okay? your mom's friend's coworker has a kid that died from a heart event. i don't want you getting any more vaccines. i regret that you got them as a kid, i'd redo them. what do you mean you'd vaccinate your own kids? are you finally thinking of having some? you know i want grandkids - oh stop, i've never pressured you, i'm just saying that if you're going to get gay married, you might as well give me some normal grandkids to love.

stop, you know what i meant. what? no, he's not going to take away your right to adopt. besides, you could always use a sperm donor, haha, i know your high school ex would love to - jesus! okay! no need to snap. i'm just saying that you don't need to be married to have a kid. the only real benefit to marriage is taxes, haha. it won't change anything. oh my god, no, there won't be a rise in hate crimes. well, it's not his fault what people do in his name! he eventually spoke out against that, anyway.

what do you mean he supported them? i didn't hear him say that. oh. well, yeah, he said it, but like, he's clearly joking.

[opikiquu]

iknow my comics are ugly please just hear me out

[halorvic]

December 19-21, 2024

[seravphs]

You let Gojo borrow a pen and he spreads a rumor that you’re dating

[qoldenskies]

i rewatch rottmnt a lot because i try to pick up on new things to improve my characterization and i think its so funny that one of the most noticeable things about mikey is his complete inability to read the room. oblivious king

[vespidclan]

[MOON 30 PT 4]

NEXT

Me too, Vinepaw…

But hey bud, cheer up! There’s nothing wrong with a little Grandma N’ Grandson bonding! Unless you’re in a comic called Vespidclan, you might wanna be a little careful around her then…

[artuurle]

doodlepage and then a bunch of pre godhood lovestory. gramps keeps hanging on so he can get it.

[lloydfrontera]

the webcomic can have one (1) funny "earnest moment interrupted by comedy" joke. as a treat. but also because it is so in character for them ajkshdjkas

yes they will say the most earnest shit to each other and then immediately try to cringe out of their own bodies. they are best friends but they would rather jump out of a window before admitting it. they are incredibly devoted and grateful to one another but you could not water board that out of either of them.

the only thing that can get either of them to admit how much they care for each other is if the other is in life threatening danger and not a second before aakjshdks

[infamouslydorky]

Listen, you will sexualize that old man, yes, but you will also sexualize that old woman. No elderly is safe

[dv-kelp-face]

SPOILERS FOR MARK OF ATHENA!!!

Makes me wonder if Zeus and Poseidon bicker like this

[mamawasatesttube]

"girl dad" this, "girl dad" that. if im being honest you guys are so fucking weird about gender roles and bioessentialism

[lemoyne]

i hate bioware so much it’s unreal. why did they make solas’ agents a whole Thing in trespasser only for them to be nonexistent in datv???

trespasser really hyped up solas’ agents as a force to be reckoned with. ‘watch out, solas’ agents are everywhere, even among your own people and allies! watch out, all the elves in thedas are vanishing to go join the dread wolf in his quest!!’ ok so where are they. they don’t exist in veilguard

[d8tl55c]

physeng(write, file, "tco_physeng_breakdown.png");

to:compiler {file}

to:compiler {txt: "Internet and Outernet are full of StickFigures with similar body plans, so there are optimizations for rendering vector strokes specifically. it's way more efficient to use those optimizations than keep calculating perfect spheres for no aesthetic benefit."}

{txt: "btw why haven't heat issues been patched yet"}

{txt: "i fixed this years ago for the latest model. remember."}

from:compiler {txt: "Thank you. The avast! nodes will appreciate the credits. TheChosenOne.exe has been unreachable for some time."}

to:compiler {txt: "you mean OuternetPhysEng still won't update their programs"}

from:compiler {txt: "Yes."}

to:compiler {txt: "and still won't provide a specific location?"}

from:compiler {txt: "Do not allow them to bring up the moral argument again."}

to:compiler {txt: "OK. fine. yes. i will spare both of us"}

to:compiler {txt: "abridged or full docs?"}

from:compiler {txt: "Abridged. Please describe the acronyms."}

to:compiler {txt: "ofc"}

{txt: "

sel.per.filter: standard StickFigure component (src)*****. invisible membrane with special collision properties. protects mouthparts.

H2O scoop: avast! code. implements water retrieval from ambient air.

EIS: avast! code. destroys ingested materials identified as, "dangerous" before they reach internal systems.

SOS: avast! code. they only said this one was, "used for control."

ECL: avast! code. recycles some forms of contact energy.

THROUGHLINE: base code, initialization data, and processing space for vitals. found in some form in all StickFigure-type worms. following unique sectors noted: Black Hole Monitoring System, Basic Intake Threat Enum, Fly By Wire.

smaller points list other vital and peripheral systems.

"}

from:compiler {txt: "Thank you. That's enough."}

end(physeng());

@compressedrage as per my previous email /silly

related: pliable stick figure biotech

[fukashiin]

ACEYUU WOKE ME FROM THE DEAD

book 7 spoilers <3 very long rant im sorry!!

it was never meant to be this way. when he was such an ass to us in the prologue, when he laid those pesky remarks upon us and immediately assuming that we got into NRC as a janitor because we weren't good enough without any prior knowledge of how we were brought here against our will and having to adapt to such an unfamiliar environment where everything - trends, names, history, and even the currency - were different. he didn't know about the throbbing headache we had while the headmage was explaining the school's curriculum and suddenly bringing up the word "magic" into the conversation like it was foreign language.

he thinks he's above us just because we're a clueless student who couldnt cast any spells and took up the miserable job just for the sake of money and to live. he had this one-way "not my problem!!" mindset about us that he dipped the moment after because he never would have suspected that we would grow to be something more important, something more irreplaceable in his life.

he never meant to test the waters, and he's drowning by mistake.

his concern for you gets more obvious as each book advances (or was it always obvious??). you're just an otherworlder oblivious to the dangers that lurk in twisted wonderland, so it's only casual for him to fret about when you've been taken into scarabia with minimal escape routes, to be the first one to notice that you were missing among the entourage of people that have been kidnapped, to be the only one to point out that you weren't in the best condition AND suggesting to bring you back home in case the party was all too much. he knows how vulnerable you are, and he jumps into action as quick as possible because that's basically his brand. nothing deeper!!! (unknown dangers lurk around you on the daily, but you lurk in his mind so much more than he lets on. you're probably more used to the dangers of magic than he's used to the thought of you occupying his mind 24/7. isnt that ironic)

and he didn't consider the complications of how dangerous it could be for the headmage to send us back to our original world, possibly damaging the very fabrics of time and space and ceasing to exist while transporting - he just instantly goes to the part where the news was positive and that we could travel between Twisted Wonderland and earth in one piece, blocking out his surroundings just to see your smile, as that was possibly the happiest you could have ever been in front of him.

imagine each time he hangs out with someone new, or if someone has gained a romantic interest in him once you've left, he tries to find a part of "you" in them in his peripheral vision. whether they have an ounce of bravery that you had, whether they're as understanding as you are to know that he isn't just a human built of jokes and pranks, whether they won't doubt him like the rest did - as you were the only one who truly believed in his capability to truly lead the rest out of danger.

he could beg for other people to believe in him, to see that his skills could draw out much more if he really wanted to, but he didn't have to do that with you. in a flashing moment of possible failure, he turned to you in a heartbeat, uncharacteristically, desperately calling out for you to save him because he had no idea what was happening. he almost started to lose himself and quickly realises that the power he was wielding so suddenly wasn't some lousy spell, that it could possibly cause someone's life, and you were there to steady him when he needed it the most. a rarity of a scene he entrusted his entire body to you with. you believed in him. you ARE the betterment of him.

you held his hand like a vow, to protect each other and strengthen through every obstacle and turmoil that drives you one step closer to becoming a better version of yourself. your hand, tightly coiled around his, radiated the warmth and comfort he needed in his times of darkness and inner conflict.

it should've been you. you're perfect.

and that's why his dream still has you in it. it doesn't have to be one way or the other, you can simply go back and forth to his world and your own in just a snap! he could never dream of you leaving his sight and grasp, hindering him from ever telling you how much you actually meant. he has all the time in the world.

and that's what he wants, but his heart says otherwise, and that's fine. he just wants you to be safe and see him for who he is. you inspired him to take pride in his name, as an ace can do anything!!

[diwtara]

Sanjis love life can be summed up as a series of one night stands.

Thats never the way he wanted it to be though

He dreams of love, of a real connection, of building a home.

But it seems everytime he finds someone, all they want to do is fall into bed with him, then ghost.

He would almost convince himself that hes just bad at sex, but sometimes one of his ex's will text him, make it clear theyre not looking for anything serious just another 'fun night'.

So hes not a bad lover, just unlovable

He hates himself for everytime he agrees to meet back up with one of them. Eventually, when being seen as no more than a warm body begins to wear him down, when it begins to hurt to much to continue on, he will block that persons number, vow not to fall back into such a self destructive pattern.

Until he does.

Over and over.

When he meets Luffy and his friends, well, its not the type of love Sanji has always been searching for, but with them theres a connection and its real.

And from Luffy, Sanji meets Zoro. Their friendship may be unusual, but its there. Its there with their shared looks of exasperation at Luffys antics, its there through their bickering, its there in their shared silences.

Until Zoro goes and asks him out.

Sanji is pre-emptively hurt by this. He thought they got along -in their own unique way- but now he knows Zoros just going to be another person to take a tumble in his sheets, then forget about Sanji entirely. Maybe take all their other friends with him when he leaves.

Still, Sanji says yes. As painful as it will end, as it always ends, Sanji knows he wont ever get what he longs for if he doesnt grasp at any chance hes shown.

They go on a few dates. Zoro is not the most romantic person by any standard. But they have fun, they talk, they get lost, they get to know each other.

Its the fourth or fifth date when after walking Sanji home Zoro says goodnight, makes a face, darts in to smush their lips together, says 'goodnight' again and takes off at a brisk pace. It leaves Sanji standing stunned for a good minute. When he wraps his head around their first kiss he cant help but laugh fondly over how adorable and awkward Zoro can apparently be.

Its a few more dates after that when Sanji starts to get antsy. Zoro has never pushed for more, theyve only shared a few chaste kisses, but Sanji knows. He knows either he sleeps with Zoro and he loses him. Or he doesnt sleep with him, Zoro gets bored and Sanji loses him.

So after their next date Sanji brings him home. Bring Zoro to his room.

Its intense.

Zoro watches him, studies what Sanji likes. Makes himself vulnerable too.

Sanji has never had sex like it before, cant imagine having an experience like it with anyone else.

And in the morning Zoros still there. Snoring away beside him.

Sanji knows that that doesnt have to mean anything.

He cooks breakfast and Zoro wanders into the kitchen half asleep. But Sanji knows, once Zoro has some food, once hes a little more awake, the man will leave.

But he doesnt.

They spend half the day together, Sanji spending it in a confused daze.

They go out on more dates.

Zoro holds his hand in public.

Presses a kiss to Sanjis temple and only waves off their friends teasing when he does.

Its the morning after the third time they spend a night together when Sanji finally breaks down.

The early morning light is soft through his curtains. Zoro is snoring spread out beside him, and Sanji, sitting up, starring at him, bursts into tears.

Zoro wakes up confused, tries to ask whats wrong, but Sanji is sobbing too hard to explain. Not that Sanji would even know what to say.

So Zoro wraps his arms around him, pulls Sanji in close. Rubs soothing circles on his back and tells him "I've got you. I've got you."

And thats when it hits him.

Thats when Sanji knows; Zoros planning on staying